#now do i think this was the plan on the part of the writers when the show was airing?
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obxanon · 2 days ago
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Addressing the OBX drama and the speculations:
Was JJ’s Death planned?
No, Rudy asked to leave the show. It wasn’t something the writers planned. He didn’t want to renew, the writers were rightfully upset and then decided to kill JJ off.
Did the writers/producers create an uncomfortable set?
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No, they didn’t. This post is not true. The brothers were never inappropriate.
Was Madison a bully on set?
I’ve seen a post going around of someone saying Madison was a bully, controlling the set, and bluntly treating Rudy and crew members like crap. That is NOT true. 
Was Rudy’s decision sudden?
Yes and No. No as in he let the Pates know ahead of time he didn’t want to continue (some time during the strike, so they had time to change what was already written). Yes, as in they were shocked by it.
Was there on set drama between Rudy and the Pates?
Yes, there was many disagreements/personal problems during s4. Yes, Elaine was involved and so was Lilah Pate. They are civil now.
Why did every ship but Jiara get a still?
The jiara still does exist but idk why it was not released. My source doesn’t know either and I don’t want to spread something not true. Rudy and Madison took pictures just like everybody else did.
Why did the cast chemistry seem off in part 2?
They shot episodes 1-5 first, THEN 10, then 6-9. The cast didn’t know rudy asked to leave until they received the script for episode 10. You can tell there was a drastic change between JJ and Kiara in part 2 because after the cast found out, Madison was upset with Rudy and his decision, so she didn’t put in as much effort into the scenes with him. She was upset because she knew that would mean the near end of obx and her character… in a way.
Was there alternate endings?
Yes, but that was only because they wanted to see if rudy would change his mind. There was even scenes where a funeral was shot (obviously they didn’t air it so I’m assuming they’re saving it for s5). From March-June of 2024, they spent the entire time doing reshoots of some scenes. That is why some things don’t make sense.
Did Rudy and Madison talk on set?
Yes, but not closely or anything. They’re not friends, they just did the scenes they had to do and that was it. All those people saying they’re hiding their friendship from the cameras or whatever… that is not true sorry. The pates can’t force them to act like best friends as long as they were doing their scenes.
Why did Jiara have “less” than everybody else?
It’s true that Jiara scenes were toned down. Part of it was Rudy asking for it. Madison didn’t care as much. Another part was just Rudy and Madison not doing more than what the script asked.
Was Elaine uncomfortable with Jiara scenes?
Yes, and she has been since s2. It got worse during s3 and obviously s4. That was part of the conflict.
What is the Rudy and Madison Drama?
Obviously what happened between them is private. It wasn’t the fans. The fans were more so the catalyst to something that had been brewing. 
It is true that the girlfriends are involved and that they weren’t happy. Madison hurt Rudy, but not by being a bully. It was emotionally. The feeling was then returned on his end and it just got worse from there. It didn’t help when the girlfriends and fans were involved. It is true that it’s not a coincidence this happened when they both got involved with relationships. Most of you have speculated correctly, that is all I will say. I think you know by now what I’m trying to say.
Also when I say fans, I don’t mean the “shipping.” They never cared about that. What I do mean is that all this drama happened when Jiara fans were at their peak. Them wanting to see those characters together put Rudy and Madison in a problematic situation because they knew they couldn’t avoid each other on screen. Instead they just did so off screen.
Should the Writers/ Directors/ Producers stepped in?
Yes, but what I need you guys to understand is that these writers were basically father figures to those actors. They watched them grow their careers, supported them, made them who they are now. It’s hard when you spent so much time with each other and became a genuine family. Even their conflict with Elaine was hard because Jonas knew her family, his wife treated her like a daughter, and lilah treated her like a sister. They had every right to be bitter because from their POV, it’s basically like “hey I trusted you to bring my project to life and now I’m being forced to go in a direction I never wanted to go in.”
What’s going on behind the scenes right now?
A mess. They knew it would be bad but infact it is worse and they know that.
Am I reliable?
Honestly I don’t care if you believe me or not. You didn’t before and I got attacked (literal death threats in my inbox). I’m just a messenger. I’ve given you info before and clearly I didn’t lie about it. It’s up to you to decide.
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starry-bi-sky · 2 days ago
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Okay so this is almost a direct copy-paste of my earlier reblog but only the Xin Yuan parts, because its long enough to be its own post and i want to share it! It deserves it's own post <3 typical starry stuff to write a 2k word long reblog, unfortunately.
I say almost because I went through to proof read and ended up adding more stuff.
I've been cooking on this idea for the last two days since I saw the Xin Mo!Shen Yuan post but??? I can't find anything on Xin Mo's backstory or how it came to be -- which means that's free fucking plot right there baby. That's a sandbox and im making LIFE SIZED CASTLES. I'm so excited.
The idea of Shen Yuan transmigrating centuries before the events of PIDW as Xin Mo -- but when he wakes up, he's not the sword. He wakes up in the body of a young boy named Xin Yuan. Now it makes sense for this boy to be a demon, but the drama, the intrigue, the spice of Xin Yuan being a human child.
SY wakes up as a boy below the age of ten, and the System tells him where he is, and SY is excited to meet his favorite protagonist -- only to gradually realize that he's like, a thousand years or so before the events of the novel. The rant he gives the system is legendary.
Bc what's the point of getting dropped into PIDW if he's never going to meet his favorite character??? This is a scam! BUT he settles into his new life, he's like, some orphan street rat or some other tragic airplane-esq backstory.
The system gives Shen Yuan his first mandatory quest: become a righteous cultivator. Which was like, kinda his plan/hopes anyways, except! There's like?? No official cultivator sects anywhere? The Cang Qiong Mountain Sect hasn't even been established yet, and there are pockets of cultivators running around, maybe some groups or schools popping up and then sinking back down, but nothing's really taken root!
If he asks someone how to become a cultivator, there's no straight answer. No "oh you can go to X to do that". He's pissed! How can he become a cultivator if there aren't any schools around to teach him? Deus ex machina, that's how.
Out of sheer luck, SY manages to help save a rogue cultivator, and promptly gets adopted by said rogue cultivator, who gives SY the name 'Xin Yuan'. He is ecstatic. And you know what? It's actually pretty fun!
He's getting to travel the world of PIDW in its early stages, and gets to see the building blocks for the eventual main story. He's discovering all this local flora and fauna that are foreign to his old world and unmentioned in the book, and he's learning cultivation! Granted, its unsafe, newly(ish) discovered cultivation, but it counts!
Wistfully, he thinks about perhaps he'll do something grand and get his name carved into legend. Something that would eventually help the protagonist later down the line in his quest for revenge.
The system remains silent to his thoughts.
But Xin Yuan doesn't take much stock in that daydream anyways. It's nothing more than fantasy to him; wish-fulfillment. He does discover however, that he is positively brimming with spiritual energy. Overwhelmingly so.
It's both a blessing and a curse, as it puts a strain on his meridians if he's not careful, and leaves him prone to qi deviations for the exact same reasons. He already has a heart demon or two from a few traumatic experiences in the past.
(bc hey! angst a day keeps the writer sadism at bay, and all that)
I'll say he's about... eight when he gets picked up by the rogue cultivator, who I'm calling Lin Kai bc he deserves a name. They travel around PIDW up until Xin Yuan is twelve, where he goes through a traumatic experience that results in a heart demon.
It's after that that Lin Kai decides to put a stop to his wandering, and find a place to settle down to raise Xin Yuan in. Coincidentally! They settle down in a nice mountain region that's thriving with spiritual energy. The mountains at the time were called something different, but they will be eventually known as the Cang Qiong Mountain Sect
Coincidentally, the mountain Lin Kai and Xin Yuan end up on is Qing Jing Peak. XY does not realize that the mountain he's on is Qing Jing. The System does not tell him. But he likes it there, more than he was expecting. And as much as he's traveled around, he really does enjoy being in one place.
He has a tendency to go down the mountain and help the village setting up down there, and when he's a teenager he starts venturing out more and more.
Xin Yuan forgets sometimes that he's in a novel, especially after settling down on Qing Jing peak. The system becomes remarkably quiet since there's no quests for him to do and not a ton of opportunities to get B-Points. He cultivates with Lin Kai, helps tend to the garden they're growing, goes down to the village to play with the other kids.
There's one boy he's best friends with, a boy whose not all that good with words, named Liu Zhihao. He's got potential for cultivation though, so Xin Yuan drags him up the mountain when he can so that Liu Zhihao can sit in on lessons with Lin Kai. He drags him all over the forest at the foot of the mountain to go look at bugs and animals.
(One time, when they're fourteen and Liu Zhihao has been learning cultivation for a few years now, Xin Yuan drags him out of bed late one night to go look at the stars. Xin Yuan tells Liu Zhihao about ascension -- something that still feels like a far off dream to many in this time -- that night, while they're sitting on the wet grass.)
("We should ascend together." Xin Yuan tells Liu Zhihao, jade eyes gleaming. Never let it be said that Xin Yuan doesn't love deeply, no matter what kind of love it is. He was always so lonely as Shen Yuan, Liu Zhihao is his best friend. "We'll become immortals, and then we won't ascend until the other is able to.")
(Liu Zhihao stares at him silently, his face unreadable. Then, quietly, he asks; "Promise?")
("Promise.")
When he starts adventuring outwards, further away from the mountain and the village, Liu Zhihao sticks to him like rice. Not that Xin Yuan's complaining, that's his best friend after all, and Liu Zhihao has become a formidable cultivator. He deserves to show off his skills.
He starts making something of a name for himself by the time he's, like, 18 -- although that name is in its baby steps, along with Liu Zhihao. They're slowly growing renown.
Perhaps XY uses his knowledge of PIDW and cultivation in general to help make advancements in the cultivation field. Although the system prevents him from sharing too much, it doesn't mean he can't practice it himself. Perhaps he's one of the first cultivators to develop a golden core. One of the first known immortal cultivators. One of the first to have a spirit sword.
(Although I don't know the logistics of any of this since my knowledge on xanxia/cultivation stuff in general is all still pretty new and google wasn't all that helpful lol.)
Either way, its my excuse to eventually make Xin Yuan come across as ethereal to other people. Peerless beauty SY for the win. Hs wifebeam is too strong, Xin Yuan has a line of suitors following after him and he's completely unaware of it. The rest of history is not.
Demon realm stuff has been stirring up since Xin Yuan was a kid, but at the time it was rare and in the beginning stages. Its been steadily ramping up and the system is sending him on more and more treacherous quests -- some of them mandatory, some optional. SY doesn't often take the optional ones unless it comes with a sufficient B-point reward.
for all intents and purposes though, he's a wandering rogue cultivator with Liu Zhihao, going from place to place to either help a town or village, or to discover more creatures or artifacts (although there aren't that many). Just all around living his life. He participates in a few major quest lines that are sure to get him mentioned in legend, even if it's a background character way.
(Unbeknownst to him, rather than being a side character in these legends, he's named directly. You can't become one of the first immortal cultivators and NOT get name dropped for clout.)
He has a spirit sword named Shā Mó, (杀 shā - to kill/weaken/counteract/reduce) (魔 mó - evil spirit, demon, possession). He routinely goes back to QJP to see Lin Kai, or to rest when traveling has worn down on him and he wants nothing more than to sleep somewhere he knows he'll be safe in. It becomes more frequent as Xin Yuan becomes more famous. Liu Zhihao often comes with him.
it all comes to a head though when the rifts between the demonic realm and the human realm become too great, and the balance between both realms becomes unstable. A demonic emperor's influence, wanting to merge the two realms so he could conquer both to satiate his own greed.
Typical evil king stuff. This comes to a climatic head in a great battle between every cultivator available and the demon emperor's army. Xin Yuan was one of the many who helped lead the charge.
In the end, it was Xin Yuan who ends up defeating the demonic emperor, but the rift that the emperor used to cross between worlds is destabilizing as well. Except instead of trying to close, it's getting bigger and bigger, threatening to swallow the heavens and earth and demonic realm whole.
You know how Yue Qingyuan's soul is bonded to his sword due to a qi deviation? Let's take it a step further >:)
Xin Yuan uses himself and Shā Mó to close the rift. However, it takes all of his spiritual energy to do so, as well as him filtering the demonic qi into his body to redirect it back to the demon realm.
In the end, Xin Yuan and his beloved sword Shā Mó fuse. Xin Yuan's soul becomes trapped in the sword. His physical body is unable to handle the immense amount of power it takes to close the rift, and is destroyed. He is immortalized in legend by his grieving cultivators.
(Liu Zhihao ends up ascending alone. He ascends with the hope that one day he'll see Xin Yuan again, even if it's in the face of someone else. Lin Kai does not ascend, too weighed down by the grief of losing his son.)
Xin Yuan, now Xin Mo, falls into a stasis. He's very confused and disorientated when he regains 'consciousness'. The system has been silent for most of his life, only popping up to give him mandatory quests, hints, points, or to answer any questions.
But once he wakes up, it cheerfully pops up again, congratulating him on completing the origin story of Xin Mo. SY freaks the fuck out. he'd shake the system screen if he could, but he doesn't have arms. or legs. or eyes for that matter.
He can sense his surroundings, but its all like imprints to him. He can sense the energies, but he can't see anything. It's all very disorientating and horrifying after years of being human. Like a sensory deprivation chamber.
The closing of the rift and the cycling demonic qi tainted both Sha Mo and Xin Yuan irreparably, and it did some kind of damage that resulted in SY needing to feed in order to use the spiritual powers. Kinda like how Xuan Su uses YQY's life force for it's spiritual energy, but instead of feeding on his own lifeforce, Xin Mo feeds on others.
The rest is history. Xin Mo is originally tied to the story of Xin Yuan -- believed to be all that remained of the man after he sacrificed himself to keep the realms separate. It's believed that the force of the realms closing permanently infused Sha Mo with demonic energy, turning it into Xin Mo.
But, like many stories do when faced against the tide of time, things get lost; chipped off; changed. Xin Mo is steadily separated from Xin Yuan, especially once it becomes clear how parasitic the sword really is, until they are all but separate entities themselves and the origin of Xin Mo's creation all but forgotten.
The years blur together when Xin Mo is not being wielded, and at first Xin Yuan was agonized by the fact that he stole the lives of all his wielders. He knows it's only a novel, but his decades spent in this life have softened him, and he's grown attached to the world around him.
But time erodes the mind like water erodes stone, and he becomes numb to it, then eventually anticipating of it. He forces himself to remember what he knows of PIDW's plot, and kinda fixates back on his old obsession on Luo Binghe. But while PIDW stays in his mind, his memories as Xin Yuan fall to the wayside.
Not forgotten, per se, but... tucked away. The system prevents him from forgetting fully.
Xin Mo isn't fully a demonic sword either i think, but instead harbors an ugly cocktail of both spiritual and demonic qi. Special circumstances and all that. Everyone just assumes he's a fully demonic sword because that's usually at the forefront, his spiritual qi weakened from the initial fusion and from years of not being fed spiritual qi. It's part of the reason his wielders always end up destroyed by him, other than the whole, yk, 'overwhelming qi' thing.
Nobody would recognize Xin Mo's human form as Xin Yuan other than some truly ancient demons. Of which Meng Mo might. But even that's iffy because there's a lack of surviving paintings of Xin Yuan, but also because of XM's demonic appearance and supposed lack of connection to XY.
Xin Mo has never spoken to his wielders before, not in the same way he does Luo Binghe. He tells Luo Binghe this, and he also tells Luo Binghe down the line that he is both spiritual and demonic -- something he also never told his wielders because there was no point to it.
okay okay i've got to end it here because its already gotten ridiculously long -- of which im both apologetic and unapologetic for -- but i DO think the Shang Qinghua and Shen Yuan meeting (and reveal) would be fucking hilarious. Especially if SY has learned how to pop between sword form and human form by then -- although i guess it doesnt matter either way because SQH's reaction is still the same.
And that reaction is internally screaming and going "hey what the FUCK?? WHY DOES XIN MO HAVE A HUMAN FORM??? WHAT IS THIS??? SYSTEM??? EXPLAIN???"
meanwhile from his place on the sword hilt xin mo is squinting at Shang Qinghua in bewilderment and going "aren't you supposed to be dead" but doesn't pay too much mind to it because its not like its going to change anything.
...up until he catches shang qinghua going "WTF" silently from his little corner while all eyes are off him. One moment SQH is standing beside his king, and the next he's been tackled to the ground by one wild-eyed, human-shaped Xin Mo.
everyone, including SQH, thinks Xin Mo is going to kill him. It is a surprise to everyone when he does not, and instead dissolves into deranged, uncontrollable laughter after spitting out some phrase in some ancient tongue and watching SQH's eyes grow wide in recognition.
#svsss au#svsss#scum villain au#scum villain#scum villain self saving system#shen yuan#shen qingqiu#luo binghe#liu zhihao is indeed based off liu qingge. i am a multishipper at heart and liushen is a delicious ship. XY and LZ i think were very devote#to each other regardless of if it was romantic or platonic. they're besties! and im a sucker for devotion in all aspects. its neat :)#XM eventually tells LBH about how he used to be human once and he tells him about his Xiao Zhi. and that he hopes Xiao Zhi was able to reac#ascension in his absence. LBH silently seethes with jealousy and abandonment issues a mile wide. he asks XM if he misses him. XM gets this#unreadable distant look on his face that makes him look far more mortal than is comfortable. then he mutters 'yes.' LBH hates it#Cang Qiong sect gets miraculously spared by Luo Binghe on account of 'my demonic sword grew up here and he'd be upset if i ruined it'#does LZH look like LQG? ...i want to say yes bc itd be crime to derive SY of LQG's beauty even if he never knows what LQG looks like#imagine XM as human coming to clash with YQY. he takes one look at YQY. then at Xuan Su. before going 'we're alike. you and i.'#rip SQH. executed for the crime of *checks scroll* making XM laugh before Binghe could. making XM laugh at all actually#XM is usually very reserved and restrained but for the first time in a thousand years he's met someone just like him. the emotional rush#is intense. SQH asks him later how long he's been Xin Mo. expecting like. at LEAST a few years now or after him but then XM blinks at him#and then mutters something about how he's lost track of time. oh hey btw what year it is??? he forgot to ask. SQH tells him and Xin Mo says#'oh! about a thousand years now' 'WHAT' and XM tells him about being Xin Yuan which SQH was not expecting. whether thats because#he genuinely wasnt expecting it or it was part of his outline or an idea he messed around with and didnt expect to make it into the world#SQH tells him about the legend of Xin Yuan. XM is stunned. he asks about Liu Zhihao. LZH made it into legend too. which XM is very#pleased by. 'good. he deserves it for all the hard work he put in.'
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asraindarkness · 3 hours ago
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If it’s okay, not necessarily BuckTommy but -
This season feels SO weird. It’s even weirder because for the first time they had a long time to plan it - they knew they were renewed for a Season 8 early into Season 7. So much so that, for the first time, they let the season end with a cliffhanger. Multiple, even.
And they they dropped all of them in a rushed and unsatisfactory way. If they didn’t want S7’s plots to continue on to 8, they could’ve ended them in S7. Never bring Ortiz or Gerard back. But instead, they went with the oddest choice and created a nice cliffhanger, only to disappoint pretty much everyone.
But for me it’s more than that. It’s also the way the characters don’t always feel like them. You’re telling me Buck never went into a deep dive about queer history or rights when he discovered he’s bi?? that Maddie would make the making men gay comment?? that Chimney wouldn’t talk to Hen about the possible second pregnancy?? I could go on and on.
And the dynamics also feel… broken. We barely have friendship moments, at all. Buddie this season feels weird, like Eddie doesn’t really want to be bothered by Buck. Hen and Chim are barely communicating. The firefam doesn’t have moments outside of emergencies (save that montage of them asking Bobby for help).
It feels like the writers have stopped knowing how to write these characters and their dynamics. And for me the found family that I fell in love with at first watch feels gone, you know?
i’ve been saying this since s6!
like aren’t they tried of keep writing buck the same all the time??? he doesn’t get promoted on his job that he’s fucking good at it, they had a kind of story about it when buck wanted to be captain in s6 and then bridge fall happened and buck was a fucking powerhouse in it and i thought they finally gonna show buck more that just a young goofy firefighter that thinks on his feet, show them he’s a leader but then they dropped it.
he doesn’t get into lasting relationship and is always chasing one and apparently now he’s gonna forget his character’s growth and gonna be right back in s1. it’s like buck’s always gonna be the boyish bratt they made in s1 when he was 25/6 not a 33yo man!
eddie can’t fucking move on for 6/7 years and tries constantly to make a mom out of everything woman he dates but now a confession and a random priest apparently healed him like he was possessed not fucking mentally traumatized!
madney are most of the times are dealing with dough that comes out like random jump scares. maddie had 2 stories last season both was about her trauma with him. yes you can’t heal from something like that for a long time or possibly never but for god’s sake that woman raised his brother as his own child when she was still a child herself and what did 911 do with this part of her? NOTHING
and you don’t need me talk about hemren’s endless suffering
and where is athena’s children???
it’s been a mess since s6 but now it’s wors cuz tim starts writing 5 minutes before they start shooting. i said it 100 times the only thing good about s7 was buck’s bi arc. they make a big deal out of problems and solve them in most childish ways in the same episode!
i know it’s basically a soap opera but ffs it’s not a fantasy. they pulled dead wife no.2 cuz it’s a soap but in what word a child can land a plane?
honestly after i reed that tim rewatched the whole thing before writing for bi buck i was sure the show gonna back to its root where chim and hen are besties and hen and athena spend time together etc etc, but apparently all he got from that is abby had a boyfriend named tommy
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trans-axolotl · 2 days ago
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Hi! I'm currently researching prison abolition, both for the sake of becoming better educated about it and because I plan to write a paper on it for class. Two questions for you:
First— what books/articles/videos/any other resources on the topic would you recommend? I've been doing some research on my own, but I'd love to have some more sources.
Second— what solutions do abolitionists offer for people who pose immediate threats? I'm struggling to find a solid answer on this. I know it's going to vary based on who you ask! Just looking for some possible answers. Mostly, I've seen this question answered by redirecting focus towards prevention of the circumstances that lead to this kind of behavior, and obviously that is important and should be the main focus, but I'm not sure what possible methods there are for people who already exist who are a threat to others' safety.
(I especially have a hard time with this question because I'm coming at it from an anarchist lens and I don't believe there should be any sort of carceral system or any governing power, but I don't know how this sort of problem can be dealt with without there being some sort of power structure).
If you don't have an answer for that second one, or just don't feel like answering, that's alright! Thanks for your time :))
Hi!
I'm going to list out a bunch of random resources--this is a very incomplete list, just with a few things that came to mind first.
Articles:
Journalism from currently incarcerated writers:
Prison Journalism Project
Scalawag Abolition Week
Marshall Prison Project
Prison Writing on Prison Abolition by empty cages collective and incarcerated workers organizing committee
Other articles:
Truthout's Road to Abolition
Reports/infographics/organizations:
Advancing Transgender Justice: Illuminating Trans Lives Behind and Beyond Bars By Vera Institute of Justice and Black and Pink
Critical Resistance.
SWOP behind Bars
HEARD
Books:
Change Everything by Ruth Wilson Gilmore
Assata: An Autobiography by Assata Shakur
Disability Incarcerated by Liat Ben Moshe
We Do This 'Til We Free Us: Abolitionist Organizing and Transforming Justice by Mariame Kaba
Are Prisons Obsolete? By Angela Davis
The New Abolitionists edited by Joy James
Captive Genders: Trans Embodiment and the Prison Industrial Complex by Eric Stanley & Nat Smith
Golden Gulag by Ruth Wilson Gilmore
Beyond Survival: Strategies and Stories from the Transformative Justice Movement edited by Ejeris Dixon and Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha
In terms of your second question:
short answer, it cannot be a one-size-fits-all solution--any abolitionist future needs to have a wide variety of options for addressing harm that are able to actual address the particular circumstances of harm and meet the needs of the people in that particular context. Harm is an incredibly broad category that can differ so much depending on context. It feels difficult to just give one broad answer for "this is what we do about harm"--it seems necessary to have a different response to someone breaking into your house versus sexual violence versus bigoted physical violence and on and on and on.
Long answer: You're right that a lot of abolitionist thinking focuses on preventing harm and fundamentally changing a lot of the circumstances that are currently causing harm in people's lives. A lot also focusing on rethinking our ideas of safety, violence, harm, and crime, and untangling all the ways a carceral state has shaped our views on those concepts. (this article titled Reclaiming Safety by Mariame Kaba & Andrea J. Ritchie is an important read for thinking about how the concept of safety is constructed in our society). But all that being said, you're right that part of building an abolitionist future requires us to have a way to respond to harm when it does occur, because change doesn't happen overnight and we need those skills now. And these abolitionist responses to harm are something that are already happening now in so many ways in so many different communities and neighborhoods--a lot of people aren't just talking about it using the terminology of prison abolition. For me, it feels really important to start by thinking about what we're already doing and look for ways we can increase our own capacity to respond to harm and to care for our community.
I don't have all the answers, but I'm going to list out some examples of ways that people are already responding to harm without prisons. i don't necessarily think that all of these approaches are applicable to every situation or that they would be the ideal response in a future when we have more options, but i do just want to emphasize that there are things that people are trying right now:
making sure that someone who caused harm isn't able to be in positions of power in organizations/work/community spaces, and making people aware of the harm that was caused.
meeting the material needs of survivors of harm--mutual aid, getting access to housing, resources, etc.
de-escalation training, having people in community equipped to step in to situations where harm is being caused. (i know a few places where this is more-or-less organized--some neighborhoods where people have sort of a neighborhood watch thing going on so people know they can call that group instead of the cops if they need emergency support. )
building up things like peer respite and many other alternatives for supporting people through madness--i have a post discussing the question of alternatives to psych wards for people labeled a "danger to others."
directly intervening in situations where harm is being caused: physically showing up to keep each other safe
financial reparations
community accountability processes focused on creating accountability for bigoted violence, gender based violence, etc.
and a bunch more ideas--I'm not going to list out every possible thing I could think of here.
I'd really recommend reading Beyond Survival, which is a trying to answer some of these questions through looking at examples of things that are already working, and challenges the idea that transformative justice is just community accountability processes where everyone has to sit down at a table together to talk and the survivor just ends up retraumatized. (some authors in the anthology talk in depth about times in which that kind of process would actually increase danger to survivors, in fact.) They also make a lot of room to talk about the experience of being a survivor who has all these complex emotions and feelings towards whoever has caused us harm, and makes a lot of room for messy, complicated feelings of anger or desires for retributive harm.
Some of the examples of transformative justices responses that they share include a public letter campaign to address an abuser who was popular in movement spaces, community created research databases tracking racist violence and murders, community led murder investigations through different tactics including documentary filmmaking, family members stepping in to confront abusers and remove children from unsafe spaces, building up community first aid and medical knowledge to reduce the amount cops get called, a toolkit for transformative justice plans within youth spaces, community defense groups, including groups prepared to do physical defense, and so many more examples of things that people are trying.
I'll also link the creative interventions workbook, which is a really extensive toolkit for thinking of ways to respond to interpersonal violence.
A frequent criticism of prison abolition is that it's not practical--that our suggested responses to harm are impossible and could never work. And I can understand why people respond that way. It can be really frustrating to see people list out a lot of things that wouldn't work yet where you live because your neighbors are bigoted, or you're currently incarcerated, or you live in an inaccessible city with no in person community, etc. That anger feels meaningful, because it highlights just how fucked up it is that those barriers exist and that we don't have more options for community care right now. And at the same time, if we only try ideas based on what is currently practical, we end up just using the same existing frameworks to try to build a new world, and accept the current limits placed on us through the violence of prisons and policing. I think that abolition must be a little impractical to be effective--we need to be able to move beyond what is currently practical within the carceral apparatuses of state violence, and instead work to build in a way that dismantles what the state defines as realistic.
Last thing I'll say is that for me, it is so vital to always remember that prison abolition is a political movement centered in dismantling a white supremacist system that enacts antiblack racist violence on a gigantic scale. It's not just a buzzword to throw around to refer to anything, it's important to stay connected to what this actually about, learn about the radical history and lineage of Black prison abolitionists in the US, instead of misusing and extracting political resources without having reciprocity and solidarity. And also to stay connected to prison resistance movements right now--recognizing that the most important works of abolition are happening in these carceral spaces as we speak.
if any followers have other resources about prison abolition that they want to add on, feel free!
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sundogsandrainbows · 15 hours ago
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Hi, I'm sorry to write to you out of the blue, but Of Elves and Humans was the first DA longfic that got me hooked back in 2011 when I, as a dumb teen, happened to pick up DAO. Ever since then, the DA universe has been a constant fixation of mine and my admiration for you as a writer as well as someone who isn’t afraid to call out the franchise's flaws has never wavered. Now that Bioware decided to take a massive shit on everything pre-DAV and their oldest fans specifically, I'm really devastated and feel like a fool for having been so invested in DA and its lore for those past 13 years. It’s incredibly encouraging, however, to see you keep on keeping on. "So since they spat in my face like this I ignore this atrocity of a game even exists" is where I hope to be at soon, too. Thank you.
(First of all apologies for the late reply, I put it in my drafts when i was too tired to complete it, and then my adhd brain forgot it existed due to being distracted by new shinies 😂☠)
But aww omg i cannot believe i was the gateway drug into dragon age, or rather the old version of my story on FFN was. I am so very honored <3 And nonnie, I feel you. I am invested in DA as a series since DA:O's release in 2009, like I bought it on a whim for XBox because I liked Mass Effect 1 sm. So that is 15 yrs of my life i spent loving and discussing a thing while still being critical of the thing, but now i feel so very protective of the world, lore and its characters that "New Bioware" has decided to take a massive dump of shit on, and not only the games but the old fans I feel are treated with disdain too and do not matter to them any longer.
Long, subjective rant about current bioware aka the shambling corpse of its former self and talent incoming. Spoilers for Veilguard bc i don't give a fuck to avoid them :D You (general you, not you in particular dearest nonny <3) should use your time better than to play this shit anyhow 😂
It feels like calculated malice of new Bioware to apply the scorched earth tactics to offscreen destroy everything that old fans and fans of the other games in general held dear, and was supposed to suck out the enjoyment of DAO, DA2 and DAI. Like it is obvious they plan to create a sequel on DA's scorched bones, but jfc, you can do so story-wise without spitting everyone loving what old bioware has built in the face after dropkicking them. But to me that is part of the problem, since if i remember correctly and i wish i could find the bit... they praised Veilguard as "The best Dragon Age game ever", with the most interesting companions and best most improved combat system, comparing it to the other three games in a near smug fashion. There is marketing and there is putting the other games down to prop up your most favorite and only child mattering and they were definitely doing the latter. And don't get me started on the whole "Who is Zevran" debacle or we are gonna here all day.
Bottom line is new/current devs and writer do not give a shit about and very possibly have never played any other game than Inquisition, and you cannot tell me otherwise. And since a lot of devs/writer have left since the start of this project that would become this abysmal game, I also have the impression that there is a lot of underlying resentment toward what these former colleagues have created and so they piss on it in order to make it fully theirs now. Like dogs marking their territory, and well that did not work out, imo. At all.
Ever since they announced respecting our past choices by ignoring them (????) it was clear to me that I would not play Veilguard but just watch a playthrough and all spoilers and then move on. And everything i saw before release was shocking... like i was flabbergasted at how baaaad the dialogue was, which as a writer myself is super important to me in my story. There was no subtext, characters just blurt out everything they think and feel, like a lifeless doll you squeeze and words tumbling out and just as natural. It is stilted, awkward and 80% of it exists for info dump or info dumb rather as they keep repeating the same shit they just told you a few seconds ago as if you as the player are braindead. Here is a good example of what i mean.
Jfc, who edited this crap? There is so much superfluous dialogue that adds nothing to a scene but annoyance for the player and says nothing at all. Just pure senseless yapping in the most cringy way. Why was no one there to trim this nonsense as you should as a writer/editor? Hell, they really disregarded every simple and basic writing rule (everything is told never SHOWN for example especially in dialogue) which really made me question their competence in what they were doing and thus the quality of the upcoming game but i still held out hope for it to not be that bad.
Well shit, it was even worse. In all regards. Especially the writing that cringed this writer into a new dimension with its incoherent incompetence. Jfc. they got paid for that? I'm convinced the majority of fandom writer can do much better, even unpaid. Hell my cat just by walking over the keyboard can manage a better draft and script...💀
But I digress. That is a rant for another time. Point is, nonny, despite my defiant words, I struggled too for days after i got to know the full extent of Bioware's spiteful fuckery to even look at anything da related, in my case my Alistair/Mahariel longfic. I was really down for a few days, ngl. Then again, there is nothing better than spite fueling my creativity to prove "i can write better" soooo in the end and with the help of the much better first version of DA4 in the artbook, I was able to exorcise the demons and feverdream-mindfuck of mediocrity sold to me as a turd with gold-glitter that is this game.
I have successfully now rejected its existence, filled the void with the version that should have been from the artbook and vowed to give no fucks what bioware is doing or saying and infinitely more fucks when writing my own version of thedas and the version of DA4 that should be. REWRITES BBY hell yeah. So OEAH:R is just the beginning of a verse-wise rewrite. But if you need a pick me up, nonny, you are very much welcome to take a trip down memory lane to Dragon 9:30 and see how much this iteration of the story differs from my first one back in the days. Because in this house of mine, we grow and learn as writers, unlike bioware where writer ego reigns surpreme (oh boy and does it ever show in VG) aka eating their own turds and tell themselves it is the finest chocolate 💀
There is still a lot of good about DA out there, but we have to accept it does not come from Bioware any longer. Instead it came, comes and will come from the fans and creators of art and texts and words defying their bullshit with their love and respect for the world, its lore and characters. Also very unlike Bioware.
As we should <3
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leonardburton · 3 months ago
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the thing is. juno & nureyev's relationship has been such a major guiding thread throughout the podcast and the major drive of season 5, and the fandom has built itself so much (as fandoms often do) around shipping the two of them.
and yet nureyev doesn't show up at all in the last episode! or, he does, but it's only implied (for all we know it could be like. alessandra strong)(i know it's not but it would be really funny) and we don't hear his voice.
and it's so important to me that despite the room that their romance has taken in the plot and in our hearts, his absence reinforces that the point of juno steel's story wasn't a lady getting his man, it was about learning to grow as person for himself and for his friends (and not just his love interest), and it was about finding his footing in life and being at peace with himself and his place in the world. and he did! his growth and relative serenity is so apparent and just. a balm to the soul
and the fact that his man is back is just a nice add-on, not a necessity for his happiness
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clarisimart · 2 months ago
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So, given the revelations that came with The Book of Bill, and all the intentional parallels they've drawn between Ford and Bill, and even the way we can kinda infer that Bill either saw something of himself in Ford or at least thought he found someone that could potentially really understand him...
With all that in mind, the insistence of Bill of having Ford being the one that opens the portal even after Ford realizes what Bill really is and what he wants, and rejects him... at that point it might have been easier to try and get anyone else, to possess someone and just break into the lab and open the portal that way, right? The portal was complete, he needed someone to open it, but he didn't need FORD to do it...
But, and I am not the first one to point this out by a longshot, I subscribe to the theory that Bill WANTED FORD to be the one to do it, he wanted Ford, the one person he had arguably a genuine connection with in a trillion years, to make the same mistake he did... he wanted to break Ford like he was broken, by making him the architect of his dimension's destruction.
And then he would truly have someone that would understand him completely.
Someone as damaged as him.
This concept is explored beautifully
in this fic by Caspercryptid (FaiaHae) and theneonpineapple:
https://archiveofourown.org/works/58948018/
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mossflower · 1 year ago
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ok while i’m ignoring the fact that i have a 9am lecture in six hours does anyone want to listen to me rant about nanowrimo
#so. last year i decided to do it very last minute with zero planning#it was not a good story but i had a lot of fun writing it and!! i actually finished it!!#this year i have planned a story. i have a plot. i have characters that i like. i have themes and settings and all that jazz#but i kinda just want to abandon it and work on an older project!! which is very annoying#the older project is part of a whole damn universe i’ve been developing the past few years. i am Obsessed obsessed with everything abt it#it’s very close to my heart and i really want to make something of it! and i don’t think i’m a competent enough writer to do it justice atm#also if i abandon my current nano project i highly doubt i will ever actually write it#which would be a shame because i like it! it’s a story i would have liked to read when i was like fourteen fifteenish#and tbh would still like to read now#i think actually writing it would be good practice! and i know i would enjoy it#when have i ever not enjoyed anything featuring magic time travel and lesbians. like honestly#i don’t think it’d take long for me to start writing the older project after nanowrimo either#i have a tendency to get stuck in brainstorming hell but i know how it ends. which makes everything much easier to sort#also if i don’t write something featuring the love of my life maria soon i think she will physically claw her way out of my brain#so there’s that <3#morganposting#nano 2023#now thats a scary tag to be using
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aria0fgold · 1 year ago
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Whoooaaaa! Life gotten bit hectic again but like not events but more like just me. Was feeling melancholic??? like, bit down in the dumps lately but I’m feeling better now! :D And then I had my wisdom tooth removed yesterday! Ngl tho I didn’t realize it was my wisdom tooth up until the dentist said it cuz I always referred to it as the tooth at the very end. For smth called a wisdom tooth, it sure dont grow out wisely.
Been practicing writing again too! But more like, practicing planning. I at first wanted to continue a lil personal story about my OC, Alec and while expanding more on smth I realized a lot of loopholes everywhere in his overall story and ngl, doing a self-test style where I create questions for me to answer helped a lot in finding those loopholes.
Cuz like, I’m the type of writer that goes with the flow and worry bout things later which is honestly not that good as planning goes. I’ve tried like other ways of outlining that I’ve searched up but nothing worked out and now I finally found one that does! So I’m thinking of doing that same technique with my fics too cuz there’s a lot I need to connect with everything and it can also help me with figuring out where to go next!
#aria rants#esp need a lot of planning for oafb#for the ppl that read it yk like theres a scene where at the beginning omori beheaded the corrupted king crawler monster?#i had like 0 plans for it. like legit no reason why omori beheaded the thing.#when i wrote that chapter i was like: yeah checks out thats def smth omori would do#it wasnt until i wrote the later chapters that i found a use for that scene so it wasnt just a scene that happened just cause#like omori finding that silver key and that same key will be useful during the sweetheart castle adventure#having a beginning middle and end is good for me in my fics cuz i can think up ways to bridge each one but also not that good as well#cuz of my overall writing technique that results in changes on the middle part which will later affect the end too and like damn#i need a proper way to outline everything so i dont connect as i write but i have everything connected before i write#and just build upon that connection so it dont look bad!#im just glad i found a way to outline properly when i was losing my marbles finding all the horrible loopholes in my ocs story#ngl working on my oc while looking at my omori fanfics reminds me of how much ive improved as a writer#and i love it! ive come a long way! im proud of it and im still improving! :D#so yeah! oh and im like thinking of doing smth too#basically updating all 3 fics in a very consistent manner + the aubrey and letterbrey fic i have in tumblr too#all i need now is to wake up early again cuz gurl needs to stop waking up at noon
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archaeren · 5 months ago
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How I learned to write smarter, not harder
(aka, how to write when you're hella ADHD lol)
A reader commented on my current long fic asking how I write so well. I replied with an essay of my honestly pretty non-standard writing advice (that they probably didn't actually want lol) Now I'm gonna share it with you guys and hopefully there's a few of you out there who will benefit from my past mistakes and find some useful advice in here. XD Since I started doing this stuff, which are all pretty easy changes to absorb into your process if you want to try them, I now almost never get writer's block.
The text of the original reply is indented, and I've added some additional commentary to expand upon and clarify some of the concepts.
As for writing well, I usually attribute it to the fact that I spent roughly four years in my late teens/early 20s writing text roleplay with a friend for hours every single day. Aside from the constant practice that provided, having a live audience immediately reacting to everything I wrote made me think a lot about how to make as many sentences as possible have maximum impact so that I could get that kind of fun reaction. (Which is another reason why comments like yours are so valuable to fanfic writers! <3) The other factors that have improved my writing are thus: 1. Writing nonlinearly. I used to write a whole story in order, from the first sentence onward. If there was a part I was excited to write, I slogged through everything to get there, thinking that it would be my reward once I finished everything that led up to that. It never worked. XD It was miserable. By the time I got to the part I wanted to write, I had beaten the scene to death in my head imagining all the ways I could write it, and it a) no longer interested me and b) could not live up to my expectations because I couldn't remember all my ideas I'd had for writing it. The scene came out mediocre and so did everything leading up to it. Since then, I learned through working on VN writing (I co-own a game studio and we have some visual novels that I write for) that I don't have to write linearly. If I'm inspired to write a scene, I just write it immediately. It usually comes out pretty good even in a first draft! But then I also have it for if I get more ideas for that scene later, and I can just edit them in. The scenes come out MUCH stronger because of this. And you know what else I discovered? Those scenes I slogged through before weren't scenes I had no inspiration for, I just didn't have any inspiration for them in that moment! I can't tell you how many times there was a scene I had no interest in writing, and then a week later I'd get struck by the perfect inspiration for it! Those are scenes I would have done a very mediocre job on, and now they can be some of the most powerful scenes because I gave them time to marinate. Inspiration isn't always linear, so writing doesn't have to be either!
Some people are the type that joyfully write linearly. I have a friend like this--she picks up the characters and just continues playing out the next scene. Her story progresses through the entire day-by-day lives of the characters; it never timeskips more than a few hours. She started writing and posting just eight months ago, she's about an eighth of the way through her planned fic timeline, and the content she has so far posted to AO3 for it is already 450,000 words long. But most of us are normal humans. We're not, for the most part, wired to create linearly. We consume linearly, we experience linearly, so we assume we must also create linearly. But actually, a lot of us really suffer from trying to force ourselves to create this way, and we might not even realize it. If you're the kind of person who thinks you need to carrot-on-a-stick yourself into writing by saving the fun part for when you finally write everything that happens before it: Stop. You're probably not a linear writer. You're making yourself suffer for no reason and your writing is probably suffering for it. At least give nonlinear writing a try before you assume you can't write if you're not baiting or forcing yourself into it!! Remember: Writing is fun. You do this because it's fun, because it's your hobby. If you're miserable 80% of the time you're doing it, you're probably doing it wrong!
2. Rereading my own work. I used to hate reading my own work. I wouldn't even edit it usually. I would write it and slap it online and try not to look at it again. XD Writing nonlinearly forced me to start rereading because I needed to make sure scenes connected together naturally and it also made it easier to get into the headspace of the story to keep writing and fill in the blanks and get new inspiration. Doing this built the editing process into my writing process--I would read a scene to get back in the headspace, dislike what I had written, and just clean it up on the fly. I still never ever sit down to 'edit' my work. I just reread it to prep for writing and it ends up editing itself. Many many scenes in this fic I have read probably a dozen times or more! (And now, I can actually reread my own work for enjoyment!) Another thing I found from doing this that it became easy to see patterns and themes in my work and strengthen them. Foreshadowing became easy. Setting up for jokes or plot points became easy. I didn't have to plan out my story in advance or write an outline, because the scenes themselves because a sort of living outline on their own. (Yes, despite all the foreshadowing and recurring thematic elements and secret hidden meanings sprinkled throughout this story, it actually never had an outline or a plan for any of that. It's all a natural byproduct of writing nonlinearly and rereading.)
Unpopular writing opinion time: You don't need to make a detailed outline.
Some people thrive on having an outline and planning out every detail before they sit down to write. But I know for a lot of us, we don't know how to write an outline or how to use it once we've written it. The idea of making one is daunting, and the advice that it's the only way to write or beat writer's block is demoralizing. So let me explain how I approach "outlining" which isn't really outlining at all.
I write in a Notion table, where every scene is a separate table entry and the scene is written in the page inside that entry. I do this because it makes writing nonlinearly VASTLY more intuitive and straightforward than writing in a single document. (If you're familiar with Notion, this probably makes perfect sense to you. If you're not, imagine something a little like a more contained Google Sheets, but every row has a title cell that opens into a unique Google Doc when you click on it. And it's not as slow and clunky as the Google suite lol) (Edit from the future: I answered an ask with more explanation on how I use Notion for non-linear writing here.) When I sit down to begin a new fic idea, I make a quick entry in the table for every scene I already know I'll want or need, with the entries titled with a couple words or a sentence that describes what will be in that scene so I'll remember it later. Basically, it's the most absolute bare-bones skeleton of what I vaguely know will probably happen in the story.
Then I start writing, wherever I want in the list. As I write, ideas for new scenes and new connections and themes will emerge over time, and I'll just slot them in between the original entries wherever they naturally fit, rearranging as necessary, so that I won't forget about them later when I'm ready to write them. As an example, my current long fic started with a list of roughly 35 scenes that I knew I wanted or needed, for a fic that will probably be around 100k words (which I didn't know at the time haha). As of this writing, it has expanded to 129 scenes. And since I write them directly in the page entries for the table, the fic is actually its own outline, without any additional effort on my part. As I said in the comment reply--a living outline!
This also made it easier to let go of the notion that I had to write something exactly right the first time. (People always say you should do this, but how many of us do? It's harder than it sounds! I didn't want to commit to editing later! I didn't want to reread my work! XD) I know I'm going to edit it naturally anyway, so I can feel okay giving myself permission to just write it approximately right and I can fix it later. And what I found from that was that sometimes what I believed was kind of meh when I wrote it was actually totally fine when I read it later! Sometimes the internal critic is actually wrong. 3. Marinating in the headspace of the story. For the first two months I worked on [fic], I did not consume any media other than [fandom the fic is in]. I didn't watch, read, or play anything else. Not even mobile games. (And there wasn't really much fan content for [fandom] to consume either. Still isn't, really. XD) This basically forced me to treat writing my story as my only source of entertainment, and kept me from getting distracted or inspired to write other ideas and abandon this one.
As an aside, I don't think this is a necessary step for writing, but if you really want to be productive in a short burst, I do highly recommend going on a media consumption hiatus. Not forever, obviously! Consuming media is a valuable tool for new inspiration, and reading other's work (both good and bad, as long as you think critically to identify the differences!) is an invaluable resource for improving your writing.
When I write, I usually lay down, close my eyes, and play the scene I'm interested in writing in my head. I even take a ten-minute nap now and then during this process. (I find being in a state of partial drowsiness, but not outright sleepiness, makes writing easier and better. Sleep helps the brain process and make connections!) Then I roll over to the laptop next to me and type up whatever I felt like worked for the scene. This may mean I write half a sentence at a time between intervals of closed-eye-time XD
People always say if you're stuck, you need to outline.
What they actually mean by that (whether they realize it or not) is that if you're stuck, you need to brainstorm. You need to marinate. You don't need to plan what you're doing, you just need to give yourself time to think about it!
What's another framing for brainstorming for your fic? Fantasizing about it! Planning is work, but fantasizing isn't.
You're already fantasizing about it, right? That's why you're writing it. Just direct that effort toward the scenes you're trying to write next! Close your eyes, lay back, and fantasize what the characters do and how they react.
And then quickly note down your inspirations so you don't forget, haha.
And if a scene is so boring to you that even fantasizing about it sucks--it's probably a bad scene.
If it's boring to write, it's going to be boring to read. Ask yourself why you wanted that scene. Is it even necessary? Can you cut it? Can you replace it with a different scene that serves the same purpose but approaches the problem from a different angle? If you can't remove the troublesome scene, what can you change about it that would make it interesting or exciting for you to write?
And I can't write sitting up to save my damn life. It's like my brain just stops working if I have to sit in a chair and stare at a computer screen. I need to be able to lie down, even if I don't use it! Talking walks and swinging in a hammock are also fantastic places to get scene ideas worked out, because the rhythmic motion also helps our brain process. It's just a little harder to work on a laptop in those scenarios. XD
In conclusion: Writing nonlinearly is an amazing tool for kicking writer's block to the curb. There's almost always some scene you'll want to write. If there isn't, you need to re-read or marinate.
Or you need to use the bathroom, eat something, or sleep. XD Seriously, if you're that stuck, assess your current physical condition. You might just be unable to focus because you're uncomfortable and you haven't realized it yet.
Anyway! I hope that was helpful, or at least interesting! XD Sorry again for the text wall. (I think this is the longest comment reply I've ever written!)
And same to you guys on tumblr--I hope this was helpful or at least interesting. XD Reblogs appreciated if so! (Maybe it'll help someone else!)
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bemusedlybespectacled · 3 months ago
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proposing what I'm going to call Gaylor's Razor, which is: never explain normal shit as being part of a secret message that can only be decoded by over-analysis.
"These Taylor Swift lyrics are actually coded messages saying that she's a lesbian and is forced to stay in the closet! Any lyrics that are clearly about being attracted to a man are just to throw us off the scent!" Sometimes people, like Taylor Swift, are straight and write about being straight, because they are straight.
"The fourth series of Sherlock was deliberately bad because it was actually a coded message to us fans that there is a secret fourth episode that will make Johnlock canon and will actually be good!" Sometimes writers (even experienced writers who are normally good at their jobs) will write something that's not good, because no one is perfect. They're not going to waste everyone's time and money and energy creating something terrible on purpose as part of a grand master plan.
"Tessa Virtue and Scott Moir, the Canadian Olympic ice dancers, are secretly married (with kids)! Their public relationships with people who are not each other and them repeatedly saying 'we dated as kids and now we're just friends' are just to hide the truth! Which they need to hide for some reason! Their relationship is obvious just from their physical chemistry when competing! JUST LOOK AT THIS TWO SECOND CLIP OF HIM BLINKING AT HER!" It seems counterproductive to put all that thought into hiding a relationship that doesn't need to be hidden but then also telegraph that same relationship in front of millions of people through planned choreography.
"But BB, what about times that people really are speaking in code or hiding something due to outside influences?"
If it requires huge leaps in logic, like adding all the letters in a sentence together and dividing by seventeen and that number matches the binary sequence for the color yellow so YELLOW MUST BE SIGNIFICANT, it's not a secret code.
If it requires focusing on teeny tiny details but discards huge ones, like analyzing someone's micro-expressions but handwaving away what the person is actually saying out loud with their mouth, or focusing on one specific line instead of the entire scene or song or whatever, it's not a secret code.
If both supporting and contradictory evidence are used to come to the same conclusion (ex: when Taylor says something that I interpret as gay, that means she's gay, and when she says something that I interpret as straight, that still means she's gay and just hiding it), it's not a secret code.
Trying to apply fandom meta analysis techniques to real life is a really good way of fall into conspiratorial thinking that can be easily exploited. You can totally try to predict what's going to happen in a story or choose to interpret a scene in a specific way; you can't do that in real life with real people. That way lies the kind of nonsense that leads to shit like "this image of pizza on a children's toy is actually subliminal messaging by The Cabal™ that proves that Pizzagate is real."
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traveler-at-heart · 2 months ago
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The Doctor's In - Part 3
Summary: Wanda gets a little jealous and you're in trooouublee.
Wanda Maximoff x F!R, Carol Danvers x F!R.
A/N: Part 1 & 2 are recent, so you can find them on my blog. Sorry I'm tired and lazy to link them. Will do that later lol.
Coffee in an IV, that’s what you need. However, drinking it is the next best thing so you get one from the cafeteria and give the other cup to Darcy, who’s yawning in one of the stretchers that people leave in the hallway.
“Bless you”
You hum in acknowledgment, sitting next to her.
“Duty or booty?” she asks when your phone pings.
“Ha, good one. You should do stand up” you say, ignoring her.
“So, it is a booty call” Darcy insists when you begin typing, a smile on your face.
“It’s not. My neighbour was telling me something about her children. You remember them, the Maximoffs”
“The broken arm?” you nod, sipping from your cup. “Ok, so now you text her about her children? To get into her pants?”
“No! Not everything is about sex, Darcy”
“If you really think about it, it kinda is. And you still haven’t told me why she’s texting you”
“I took care of the twins the other day, when she went out on a blind date. With a man” you give her a pointed look. “And I showed them a videogame I loved when I was kid, and apparently helped to create a new obsession”
“Which one? Lara Croft?”
“Spyro”
“The purple dragon? You are such a dork” she says, scrunching up her face. You roll your eyes, ready to give her the middle finger when her pager goes off.
“Karma” you cough up and she glares.
“This conversation is not over!” she threatens, leaving you alone.
You look at the chat with Wanda.
Wanda: They both want to be Spyro for Halloween!
Y/N: Sounds cute! They could have a little Sparks floating around on their shoulder.
Wanda: It’s all they talk about every day, I swear I’m dreaming about dragons.
Y/N: Sorry?
Y/N: I do have a plan to make it up to you.
You’re done with the coffee, at least if you want to get some rest. Still, you pick up a latte and a scone for Wanda, and carry the new videogame as you knock on the woman’s door.
“Oh, hi!” she looks at you, confused.
“Hey. Sorry, I don’t know how you take your coffee. It’s a latte, dairy free” you hand over the cup and the scone. “And I have something for the twins”
“That’s so sweet, but they’re at school”
“Today’s not Saturday?” you say, confused. Wanda giggles at that, making you blush.
“Today is Tuesday. Come on in”
“I didn’t mean to interrupt, I’m sorry” you say, following her to the kitchen.
“I don’t have to be at work for another hour, so it’s fine” she assures you. “Plus you saved me a trip to the coffee shop”
“You know, I’ve never asked about what you do for a living” you say apologetically, only now realising that you’ve barely interacted with Wanda since you moved here.
“I’m an author and illustrator” she says.
“That’s so cool! Anything I’ve read?”
“Only if you like children’s books” the woman smiles.
“Can’t say that I have read any lately. But that’s awesome. I’m a little starstruck, I’ve never met a writer before”
Wanda laughs at that, and you blush a little.
“Oh, before I forget. Maybe this will distract them from dragons” you hand over the new videogame and Wanda arches an eyebrow.
“The solution to a videogame is another videogame?” she says with her mom voice.
“Uh… yes? It’s Crash. It’s really funny. Sorry, it was dumb, forget it” you begin to regret it, reaching for the box, but Wanda does the same thing, her hand landing on yours.
“I’m kidding. It’s very sweet of you, Y/N”
The way she says your name is almost hypnotic, and once again your eyes travel to her lips.
For the first time, you’re willing to admit that it wasn’t the alcohol that made you wanna kiss Wanda.
Still, your hands are touching and you want to lean forward.
Your phone interrupts the moment, and you apologize, thinking it might be from the hospital.
Carol: I’m outside your house :)
What?
“Work?” Wanda says when you frown.
“I’m not sure… I should get home. Sorry”
“I’ll walk you out. If you want to come by for dinner and show the boys the new game, you’re more than welcomed” she offers.
“Yeah, that sounds like fun. I’ll text you later” you promise, waving the woman goodbye.
Carol is leaning against her motorcycle, and she does a double take when you walk out of the house across the street.
“Did I get the wrong house?”
“No” you laugh. “I was at my neighbour’s, I got something for her kids”
“That’s very thoughtful” Carol holds your hand, and you try not to blush at the sudden contact.
“So, what’s up?”
“I was wondering if you’d like to come to my place tonight. I’ll cook something nice, we’ll have a lot of sex and you won’t have to hold back those pretty moans of yours”
“Such a romantic, Danvers” you roll your eyes, but smile nonetheless. “I’m in”
“Alright. See you tonight” Carol says, kissing you. That’s another thing that takes you by surprise, and you don’t know what’s gotten into her.
Walking inside your home, you open the fridge and it doesn’t hit you until you see Billy’s drawing.
You told Wanda you’d be there for dinner.
Crap.
It feels cheap to cancel over what is esentially a -very tempting- booty call, but you’re also aware that you might be thinking too much of yourself. The truth is, Wanda probably doesn’t give a crap about whether or not her workaholic neighbour comes to dinner.
A few hours later, when you’re still thinking of a way to politely reschedule, you get a text from Wanda.
Wanda: I forgot we had a thing with friends from school. Maybe some other time?
Y/N: Yeah, no worries!
You try to ignore the disappointment you feel over not seeing Wanda again, focusing on the night ahead.
Here were the facts:
Wanda dated men, obviously.
Darcy would kick your ass if she even suspected you had a crush on your straight neighbour.
And maybe, just maybe, that’s what is happening.
“I hope you like parmesan chicken” Carol says, as you look around her apartment. The decoration is very modern and you admire the collection of books she has. You’re more of an online article person, but right now you’re reconsidering your stance.
“Smells great” you comment, opening the bottle of white wine you brought. You hop on her kitchen counter, watching as she finishes the food.
“So, what did your neighbours say about that thing you got them?”
“I don’t know, they were at school, but maybe I’ll stop by tomorrow”
Or maybe not, considering you’re developing a crush on their beautiful mother.
“I didn’t know you liked kids so much” she comments and you shrug your shoulders.
“I mean, I’m ok with kids, but these two are really sweet and nice. One of them was at the hospital recently, he broke his arm”
“Really? And how come I didn’t hear of it?” Carol raises her eyebrows, always on top of everything that happens at her department.
“Relax, Ortho Goddess. I drove them there and took care of everything, your intern just helped with the cast” you take a sip of your wine. “I don’t even know if you were at the hospital”
“So, no dad?”
You shrug your shoulders, a bit impatient. You were hoping to push Wanda out of your mind, and Carol kept on bringing her up.
“I’m not sure what happened, if there’s a father in the picture or not… but enough about this. How’s the grant application?”
“It’s hell. But I’m glad Kamala is so committed, I’d go nuts without her”
“Must be nice, to have an intern like that” you say, thinking about the rotation of doctors you get. They’re helpful, but none of them stay long enough to understand the logistics of an ER.
“No more chat about work” Carol proclaims and you laugh.
“Oh, what else can we talk about?“
“You’re right. Maybe we shouldn’t talk at all”  she pretends to think about it, standing between your legs. Your laugh is cut off by her lips on yours, moving impatiently until you let her explore your mouth with her tongue.
“Food’s gonna get cold”
“We’ll heat it up” Carol says, pulling your legs around her waist and carrying you across the apartment. “Let me show you the bedroom”
“We’re skipping the rest of the tour?”
“No, we’re definitely having sex in the shower” Carol says, making you laugh.
As her kissing becomes frantic, and you lose yourself in the feeling of skin against skin, for a brief moment, you forget those green eyes and auburn hair.
The rest of the week goes by in a blur. An accident in the highway keeps you locked in the hospital for 48 hours straight, and all you can manage is sleep and shower between surgeries.
You get to be for eight hours at home before returning for a day and a half shift. The only thing in your mind as you finally get in the car is working out, because you’ve seen horrible situations for the past four days and need to be so exhausted that you’ll pass out as soon as your head hits the pillow.
You go out in a sports bra and shorts, hoping the exercise helps with all the stress. After a good thirty minutes, you return home, sweating and panting.
You turn to the garden hose to pour some water on your face and neck, when you hear someone cursing and something falling.
“You ok?” you run to Wanda, trying to get her garbage can back up.
“Yeah, thanks” she says, looking anywhere but you. “Busy lately?”
“God, you have no idea” you sigh, crossing your arms. “Heard about that crash in the highway? We had like twelve people come in”
“That’s horrible” Wanda says, finally looking at you.
“It’s the job I guess. How are you? And the twins? Did they like the game?”
“Oh, they actually haven’t had…”
You hear a motorcycle pulling up and have to stop yourself from rolling your eyes. What’s Carol’s game? The blonde eyes you, and you want to smack that smug grin off her face.
“Sorry, you were saying” you ignore her, turning back to Wanda.
“It’s not important, I have to get back and make dinner” she says, saying goodbye as fast as possible. You turn back home, feeling dejected.
“Was I interrupting?” Carol asks.
“Is that supposed to mean something?”
“I don’t think you notice the way she’s looking at you, Y/N” she insists as you both step inside your house.
“Wanda? Don’t be ridiculous, she’s just my neighbour”
Your perfect, funny, beautiful neighbour who has her life together and no time to entertain a workaholic like you.
“And last time I checked, we weren’t exclusive” you add.
“Why are you trying to pick a fight with me?” she smiles, cornering you against the wall.
“Because, I don’t know what’s up with you, having me over and then showing up out of the blue. It’s very… couple-y”
“Is that so?” she leans forward, her lips barely touching yours.
“Y-yes”
“Maybe I just had a bad week, and I know for a fact you did too. So we can take a bath together, have some pizza and then fuck each other’s brains out”
This time, her lips do actually meet yours and inspite of everything, you give into the kiss.
“Unless you wanna invite your neighbour over to join us, which I’m definitely not against”
“Ugh, you’re such an ass” you break apart, rolling your eyes and going upstairs, laughing with Carol as she follows you eagerly.
They’ll have to move. That’s the only way to escape.
Wanda closes the door, leaning against it, hoping that the image of you, walking in those sinful clothes disappears from her mind.
Of course she had to make a fool of herself, dropping the garbage and attracting your attention.
If only she had gone out earlier, Wanda could have saved herself the trouble of witnessing that mysterious woman, who was very obviously your girlfriend, looking at you like you were an entire meal.
What if she moves in with you? What if Wanda has to see you everyday, kissing the blonde goodbye or hanging around or…?
“Mom” Tommy calls for her, and she has to pull herself together.
“Yes, sweetheart” she forces a smile, looking at her son.
“What are we having for dinner?”
“Well, I was thinking some mac and cheese”
And then, she’ll drown her sorrows in a bottle of cheap wine. Hopefully she’ll dream of you, sweaty and having your way with Wanda.
There’s an unfamiliar weight as you wake up, and as you turn, you look at Carol’s disheveled state.
“Blanket thief” you accuse.
“Shhh”
“Gotta pee”
“No, five more minutes” she pleads, nuzzling against your neck.
“What? Too tired after last night?” you taunt, remembering how she seemed to be insatiable and only stopped when you were too sensitive.
“Well, yeah. I rocked your world. Where’s my reward?”
“I can offer you coffee and scrambled eggs”
“Your fridge was empty, remember?”
“Oh. In that case, coffee and breakfast somewhere nice”
“Deal” she kisses your shoulder, moving to get her clothes.
“I can’t believe we have to be back in three hours” you complain, stretching. The sheet falls, leaving your entire body in full display.
“Maybe we can have something else for breakfast” Carol says, pulling you back down.
After another hour, you finally go down the stairs. You’re arguing over taking her motorcycle or your car when you hear voices outside.
Billy and Tommy are looking curiously at the motorcycle, touching the handle.
“Hey, kiddos” you greet, and they turn around, scared at being caught.
“Wanna get on it?” Carol offers and they nod excitedly.
Carol is busy showing them how it works when the front door opens, Wanda calling for the twins.
“You know you can’t leave the house like that. I am so sorry” she turns to you, but Carol is the one who answers.
“It’s no problem, really”
Wanda gives the blonde a tight smile.
“Come on, let’s get back inside”
“Oh, how long has he had the cast?” Carol says.
“Like a year” Billy says and you laugh, ruffling his hair.
“3 weeks?” you turn to Wanda.
“It’s actually 4. I meant to ask you when is he supposed to get it off”
“Come by the hospital and we’ll take a look. Children’s bones heal faster” Carol says, and it’s very obvious now that she’s inserting herself in the conversation so Wanda acknowledges she’s with you.
“Sure. I’ll text Y/N later”
“Great. I’ll make time to personally check Billy, did I get it right?” Carol turns to the kid and he nods.
“Well, Y/N has been his doctor, so I don’t think that’s necessary” Wanda pushes back, crossing her arms. All you do is look between them.
“Oh, we can both check it out if it makes you more comfortable, after all I am the head of Orthopedic Surgery”
“I thought you didn’t date other surgeons” Wanda turns, and you can finally get a glimpse of how scary she must be when one of the twins disobbeys her. She’s smiling, but her eyes tell a different story.
“I… well…” you mumble like an idiot.
“Time to go, or we won’t eat breakfast. Come on, I’m starving after last night” Carol takes your hand, pulling you away from Wanda.
You’d rather be doing an enema on a patient than witnessing this weird tug-a-war they have going on.
“Come on, boys” Wanda takes them back home, and Carol waves innocently at her.
“Seriously?” you say, ripping out the extra helmet from her hands.
“What? I was just messing with her. Come on, princess. Hold on tight”
Carol revs the engine loudly, leaving your driveway with a smile on her face.
She has the better sense to drop the subject during breakfast, picking out a small diner close to the hospital.
On the other hand, you are unable to stop thinking about everything that happened and, against your better judgement, do something that you’ll clearly regret.
You tell Darcy.
“Wait, wait, wait!” she says, holding her sides. “Your situationship and the MILF next door were fighting over you?”
“It’s not funny” you say, resisting the urge to choke her with her stethoscope.
“It so is. Girl, you gotta pick a struggle”
“You’re useless” you complain.
“No, ok, hear me out” she takes a deep breath, wiping away the tears and looking at you. “So, on one hand, you have a thing with Danvers. Do you really think she got over Rambeau already?”
“Of course not! Which is why I was fine with it being just sex. She’s the one who started doing other weird, couple stuff”
You weren’t an idiot; Carol and Maria had been together for years, and engaged until Maria left to work with Doctors Without Borders. Thought you didn’t know why they split up, it was fairly obvious that they were too proud to talk it out, but they still loved each other.
“Exactly. So, let’s say you start seeing Danvers more seriously, and then Maria comes back. You’re…”
“Fucked” you nod along, starting to understand Darcy’s point.
“On the other hand, you have the hot mom. According to you, she dates men. We have no clue if the father of her children is dead, missing, crazy… Maybe he'll come back eventually”
“And I’m fucked again” you rub your eyes, frustrated. “All I wanted was a way to destress. This is the exact opposite”
“I guess you’re very charming” Darcy shrugs her shoulders, and you’re about to thank her when she adds. “Or stupid”
In spite of everything, her words hold some truth. As you see patients and take care of the ER, you think of a way to fix everything.
Then, your phone pings and dread invades you.
Wanda: We’re in the foyer.
Fuck it, you’ll make sure you get to them before Carol and send them home before they get into another weird ass argument.
You run to find the Maximoffs, taking Billy to get an X-Ray.
“It’s urgent” you tell the technician.
But Carol is three steps ahead of you, because she asked to be informed of any patients that came to get X-Rays over cast removals.
So, by the time you and Billy come back, Wanda and Tommy are in the room, while Carol confirms Billy’s arm is completely healed.
“Hey, thank you for getting that X-Ray” Carol says with a smile and you curse to yourself.
Stupid, stupid, stupid.
“Come on, kiddo, let’s get your arm back” you bring him to the bed, where Kamala prepares to do the removal. Carol forgets her little feud with Wanda for a moment, reminding her resident how to do the procedure.
“Is that a saw?” Wanda says, pale.
“Yes, I know it looks scary but it’s perfectly safe, I promise” you say, holding on to her arm. She looks at you, nodding and you smile, letting your hand drop to her back, rubbing slowly to calm her down. Wanda leans into the touch, her shoulders relaxing.
It’s so easy, to reach out for her.
Carol doesn’t miss the contact, but keeps on observing as Kamala cuts the cast.
Billy moves his arm tentatively.
“It might be weird at first. Try to take it easy the first few days” you say and Billy nods, keeping the cast with all stickers and drawings from his friends.
“That’s pretty much it” Carol says, removing her gloves. “If you have any questions…”
“I’ll call Y/N. Thank you” Wanda cuts off.
“Mom, we should celebrate!” Billy says. “Can Y/N come over?”
“That would be fun…” you begin to say.
“Oh, sweetheart. Y/N is very busy” Wanda speaks over you. She’s not even looking your way and you hate to admit it, it kinda hurts.
“No more running down the stairs, buddy” you say, opening the door for them. The three walk out, Tommy and Billy waving goodbye.
Carol goes after you the minute you leave the room.
“What the hell was that?”
“Excuse me?”
“The touching and the love eyes” she insists.
“You’re the one that made it weird to begin with, Carol” you say, feeling a headache approaching.
“Well, yeah. We have this thing going on and you act like you’re in love with someone else”
“Now hold on” you stop in the middle of the hallway, pointing a finger to her chest. “You and I agreed it was just sex. We don’t talk about the massive elephant in the room because frankly, it’s none of my business. But be honest. If Maria came back right now, would you not to want to be with her?”
Carol takes a step back. This is the first time you’ve seen her speechless.
“I don’t know. Maybe. If she came back, I… she would come first. But that’s just hypothetical”
“No, it isn’t. Because she is right there, Carol”
You point behind her, watching as Maria Rambeau, former head of Pediatric Surgery is talking to Chief Fury.
Carol turns her head so fast you’re shocked she didn’t snap something.
The look of adoration, longing and sorrow in her eyes tells you everything you need to know.
“Go” you smile, squeezing her arm. “You should always go after what you want, Danvers”
She nods, still too shocked to move.
You’ll let them have their reunion in private and will use the rest of your shift to mope about Wanda.
“Go home” Fury says when you stick around long after your shift. “Sorry about Danvers”
“Sir, you knew?”
“I know everything” he shrugs his shoulders and you can’t help but smile.
Of course, Carol drove you here so you take a cab home, which is fine. You’re too tired and distracted to drive anyway.
Truth is, you’re not sad about Carol. The only thing you can think about is Wanda and how she left without so much as a look in your direction.
“This the place?” the driver says and you snap out of it, handing him the money and some extra. “Sweet, thanks. Have a good night”
“You too, man”
After a shower, and eating pizza leftovers, you’re still thinking about Wanda. As you sip from your beer, and look at the tv without paying attention, someone knocks at the door.
“Who is it?”
“It’s Wanda”
You jump from the couch, spilling some of the beer on your pants.
“Sorry, if it’s a bad time I’ll come back later”
“No, wait” you run to the door, opening and looking ashamed. “I spilled beer on myself. I seem to do that a lot when you’re around”
“I should have texted, I’m sorry”
“No, you can come over whenever you want. Is everything ok, are you ok?”
“Well, no” she runs her hands through her hair, and starts ranting. “I came to apologize, I was so rude to you, and I have absolutely no right to be. You have been nothing but nice, helpful and kind and I… I was a total bitch”
“Hey, hey, stop it” you take her hand, pulling her inside. “Wanda, it’s fine, I get it. I’m not mad at you”
“You have every right to be” Wanda insists, and you can see she’s spiraling, so you pull her against you, hugging her.
“I’m here. Not going anywhere”, you say against her shoulder. You only let go when you feel Wanda’s breathing going back to normal. You take a step back, your hands dropping to her waist. “Want some pizza and beer?”
“Uh… that sounds good, yeah. Can we sit on your kitchen? That way I can look out the window, just in case the twins wake up”
“Yeah, come on” you take her hand, closing the door as she enters your place.
You stay silent as you warm a slice of pizza and get another beer for you, offering her a bottle.
“I don’t think I’ve drank beer since college” she says, smiling.
“Only fancy wine?” you joke, taking a seat next to her.
“Not even that these days. Listen… I really am sorry and though it may not seem like it, I’m happy for you and Doctor Danvers”
“Oh, that’s not a thing” you interrupt her.
“Was it something I did?” she says, looking mortified.
“No, it was just… uh, never serious. I think she might be fixing things with her ex so that’s the end” you explain, removing the label of your bottle.
“Are you ok?” Wanda reaches for your hand and you blush.
Yeah, I’m ok because you’re here now.
“I am, it wasn’t serious. Honestly, it was just sex”
“Oh” Wanda blushes, and removes her hand from yours, taking a large gulp of her beer.
“I mean, we all have needs, wouldn’t you agree?” you tease, leaning forward as if you’re telling her a secret.
“I suppose so, yeah” Wanda gets lost in your eyes, hoping you close the distance.
And you want to, you really do, but Wanda gave you a hard time and you might make her sweat a little before giving in.
So, you lean back on your chair, smiling mischeviously at the other woman.
“How’s Billy? Happy to be cast free?”
“Yeah, he’s excited about getting to play that dragon game you gave them from the start”
“I guess Crash wasn’t good enough to replace Spyro” you say, understanding the twins. You always had a soft spot for the latter.
“Actually… I didn’t give them the other game” Wanda admits, chewing her lip nervously.
“Why?”
“To be honest, I wanted you to give it to them so I could… I don’t know, have an excuse to see you again”
As Wanda admits her reasoning, red invades her cheeks. Your heart skips a beat at the sweet admission, and you stand up, walking to where she’s sitting.
“You don’t ever need an excuse to talk to me”
“No?” she says, fidgeting wih her bottle.
“You can text me, call me, fax me, page me. I’ll give you my email so you have that option as well” you say, making Wanda laugh.
“I just don’t know what to talk about sometimes, I get nervous”
“Well, we could talk about the weather, how inflation is crazy high… you could tell me about the Scarlet Witch”
“You looked up one of my books?” Wanda says, blushing.
“Yeah, I have it, ready to get an autograph from the author herself”
Wanda blushes even more at that, chewing on her bottom lip. You take another teeny, tiny step towards her, eyes going to her lips.
“Or, we could not talk. There’s plenty one can do without verbal communication. Like bird watching”
“Crossword puzzles” Wanda jokes, following along.
“Kissing” you say, leaning forward until you’re inches apart. You let her decide if she wants to close the distance, and Wanda does, her lips tentatively moving against yours.
She tastes like vanilla and you sigh against her mouth, pulling her close to you.
It’s everything you imagined and more, her pretty sighs spurring you on until your hands go down her sides, and to her waist.
At the movement, Wanda breaks the kiss, making you whine.
“Is this… do you want this to be just sex?”
“You deserve more than that”
Yes, the thought of Wanda naked, moaning your name make you weak in the knees, but you also want to bring her coffee and have lunch together.
“So, does that mean…?”
“Go out on a date with me” you blurt out, trying to catch your breath.
“Yes” she nods, pulling you in for another kiss. This time, you’re not so sure you’ll be able to resist the urge of worshipping her body right in the middle of your kitchen, for all the nighbourhood to watch. “I should go”
“You only just got here” you complain, kissing down her neck.
“And if I stay, you won’t get your beauty sleep”
“Sleep is overrated” you mumble, biting down her neck playfully.
“Ok!” she holds back a moan, jumping as if your touch burns her.
“Did I hurt you?” you say, worried.
“No, it wasn’t pain that I felt” Wanda admits, turning red.
“I’ll behave” you raise your hands and Wanda steps back, not sure that she believes you. “How about next Thursday?”
“That can work, yeah. Let me just check with the nanny”
She walks to the door, lips slightly swollen.
“Sounds good. I’ll see you before that, though”
“Right, because I live across the street”
“And I might need to borrow some sugar” you joke, leaning forward to open the door, trapping Wanda’s body. “Or other stuff”
“I should go”
“You sure?”
“Yes” the woman nods, biting down her lip. Still, she pecks your lips one last time, and takes advantage of how flustered you get to walk out the door.
“Text me when you’re home” you joke, making her giggle. Still, you don’t get inside until she opens her own door, waving at you one last time.
You take your phone, reading a lenghty text from Carol saying she was really sorry about everything. And then another one comes in.
Wanda: I’m home.
Y/N: Come back.
Wanda: I wish.
Wanda: Night, Y/N
Y/N: Night, Wands.
568 notes · View notes
bluesidez · 1 month ago
Note
Can I request a Miguel O'Hara x Curvy reader where they both get intoxicated from sex pollen ??
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[Sticky-Icky]
lab taster: @waterinthefire 🩻
pairing: Miguel O'Hara x Curvy!Reader
summary: He's a lot less irritating when he puts his mouth to better use.
content warning: a PWP but you guys know me (there's a little plot), this is so 18+ that it's crazy so MDNI, sex pollen (or more like Miguel is playing around and doesn't know wtf he's doing), unprotected p in v sex (WRAP IT UP 🫵🏾) manhandling, temperature play if you squint, standing 69, facefucking, creampies, wrong use of webs, biting, breeding, spitting, squirting, cunnilingus, fellatio, fluff if you squint...I think that's it. my god.
word count: 4.3k, halfway proofread
a/n: Listening to Sticky by Ravyn Lenae inspired part of this. Also watching several episodes of Kitchen Nightmares, Hell’s Kitchen, and Law & Order: SVU in the bg kept me sane. And one more rewatch of ATSV.
My duty as a fanfic writer is fulfilled as I give you this mandatory trope. 🫡
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When you first started working at Spider HQ, you were amazed by the fact that one man was able to create all of this.
It was astounding, beyond what the gray tones of Nueva York could ever present to you.
Now, you think back to your glittering eyes during the first year working here and laugh.
Working for Miguel O’Hara was like squeezing a watermelon through a straw. He was impossible.
Nothing you did was ever satisfactory for him. Something could always be fixed. Sometimes, you wonder why he still kept you employed here.
Currently, he was turning his nose up at a salve you were working on for spiders whose healing time wasn’t nearly as quick as others.
“Run a new test. This batch is no good.”
“What’s wrong with it?”
“The formula could be better, it’s too thick, and why does it smell like that?”
The scent was similar to one you wore often and a lot of the spider-people that swung by the pharmacy seemed to like it.
“Uh, jade tea.”
The pinch in Miguel’s eyebrows deepened as he sniffed the air.
“Switch it to something else.”
You huffed, already tired of this conversation, “Well, what smell do you suggest?”
“Anything but this.”
“How about lavender, then? Perhaps peppermint.”
“And now, you’re being childish,” Miguel put the tin down before placing his hands on his hips. “You know there’s spider-people who can’t smell too much of that.”
“Yeah, I got it.”
He plopped a giant file on your desk, “Deal with that later. I need you to work on something else. For some reason, villains across dimensions are obtaining access to a substance similar to rapture. Every time there’s a mission, the spider-person of that dimension has been left affected. I need something to subside the effects until we can get them back here.”
“Ok, well do you have the substance with you?”
“No. But I’ll get you something soon. For now, I have a year’s worth of research on rapture. It should be of some use.”
You took the rubber band off of the manilla folder, something so old school for this era of tech.
You saw a line of formulas that started to make your head spin.
“Are there a lot of people affected right now?”
“Only a few. They’ve used the leftover solution I made a long time ago. It’s only going to work for so long,”
“Good. I need to sleep on this.”
Miguel’s head knocked back an inch, “Are you refusing work? The state of the heroes of different universes relies on this research. It’s not some science project-“
“I understand completely, Miguel, but I’m off the clock.”
He stopped and checked his watch, the red six o’clock burning back on him.
“I only work the hours you pay me, Spidey,” you reach to pat his arm and regret it when his stern face doesn’t move.
“Not interested in paid overtime?”
You bit your cheek to stop the laugh from coming out.
“That’s nice and all, but I’ve got plans.”
“Like what?”
“Like resting, sleeping, not touching lab work with a you-sized pole. All of these are things you aren’t familiar with. Plus, I have a date.”
A pause went through the room as you started to gather your things.
“Since when do you date?”
You push your chair under your desk harder than you mean to, “Since when do you care?”
“I,” he follows to the elevator, “care about my employees.”
“Sure, Miguel.”
If it weren’t for your tired state, you would think he looks a little sad at your statement.
“See you tomorrow, then?”
The doors start to close as you nod your head, Miguel’s gaze stuck just above your head.
Weird. Just like his frequent stops to your lab.
The feeling doesn’t leave your gut even as you’re smiling in your date’s face.
One minute, you’re laughing at a story about some amateur skateboarders Downtown, and the next, an electric billboard is being covered in tiny nano-spiders across the street.
“So the guy just takes one step on the board and then he’s flying. A straight line across the park.”
“That’s,” the spiders start to crawl into different lines. Then a logo forms, displaying the spider on Miguel’s suit next to an exclamation point. “So hilarious.”
Your date chuckles then follows your gaze, the silence too long, “Is there something wrong?”
The nano-spiders flipped around, the regular billboard showing like normal. You squint.
“No, I thought I saw something. Must have been my imagination.”
“You did say you were a little tired from work. Should we raincheck? We can always catch a movie another time.”
You wanted to say no, you’d been looking forward to tonight.
The billboard flickered to a little picture of Lyla with “SOS” above her head.
“Yeah, I should probably get going. Sorry about this.”
The way he doesn’t sweat you practically ditching him makes your heart pang. You’re already dreading another night exhausted and alone. Your date seemed promising.
You wave at him from your taxi, the route leading back to Spider HQ feeling like torture. You unclasp your purse and check your gizmo.
40 missed messages.
It’s not until you’re walking into the regular lobby that you turn it on.
“What is so important that you waste Margo’s time to interrupt my time?”
Lyla pops in your peripheral, hands up and wary, “I’m only doing what boss asks! Don’t get mad at me.”
“Lyla, why am I back here right now?”
“Well, Miguel has gotten himself in some particular trouble.”
You punch the elevator button, “Get to the point, please.”
“He went into your lab to try and start the solution he talked about earlier. After his first accident, he’s never had any luck with lab work, so uh. He’s kind of made a mess.”
The elevator moves and you look at Lyla, “What kind of mess?”
The doors open and you can smell it before you see it.
It’s poignant, like perfume soaked roses and patchouli. The scent hits you hard enough to make you grip the metal opening as you come out.
“What exactly did he do?” you breathe out.
Your limbs start to shake, nerves drumming from the inside out. A weight feels like it landed on your core, your stomach twitching as you continued to take in whatever had transpired.
“Something about DNA splicing and plants. I can trace his movements back if you’d like, but I’m also currently trying to figure out how to reverse it.”
“Great.”
You swing open the door to a disheveled Miguel. He’s sweating profusely as he tries to clean up your lab desk.
Before you can even begin to yell he’s fussing, “Lyla, I told you not to call her!”
“But you obviously don’t know what you’re doing.”
He bites his lip as he tries not to look at you, fingers trembling as he starts to store materials back into their drawers.
“Thought you had a date.”
“And I thought I told you stay away from my station,” you feel like a baby deer walking over to him.
When you get closer he sucks in his breath like you cut him, stopping in his tracks.
“I don’t think you should be near me,” he grunts. His eyes are dark, lips swollen with the way he’s biting them.
“What are you talking about? I’m trying to help you.”
You round the corner of the desk, the image of you two almost comical. Miguel moves to the edge of the desk, chest moving faster, while you chase after him trying to get a hand on his forehead.
He felt extremely cold compared to the numbness of your palm, despite how flushed he looked. His eyes close as your hand slides from his head to his neck, muscles there tensing.
“Please. Don’t,” he whispers.
“Who else is coming here to save you?” you ask, frustrated. “What did you do anyway?”
He doesn’t answer as he peers at you. Your heart is beating faster and you can’t tell if it’s because of the air or because of the way he looks like he’s about to climb you.
Every move you made felt like sharp pricks in your skin, the tight material of your dress digging into your hips. It felt like the ends of burning flames and you wanted it off. Your breaths were picking up and you couldn’t quite comprehend what was going on other than Miguel being your cooling solution.
“Miguel,” you sounded like you ran a marathon when all you did was step into his space.
“It’s the shocking formula that I screwed up. That’s why everything feels-“
“Like I need you,” you interrupt. “Like I want you on top of me.”
The insides of your thighs were fighting against themselves to stay together, the urge to let your legs fall around him strong.
“That’s just the chemicals talking. W-we can get somewhere safe and separated.”
You grab the back of his neck and pull yourself even closer, his hands gripping the table like a lifeline as he groans.
“So you don’t want me?” you press against him, caging a knee around him right next to his hand. “You don’t think about me?”
You can almost feel his heartbeat matching yours as you pull yourself up.
“I didn’t say that.”
“You don’t wonder how I feel when you come into my lab snooping around? How I feel when you come in here barking orders?”
Your face is in his neck and you feel yourself clench around nothing as you take a deep breath. He smells like coffee and fabric softener, but there’s an underlying wave of musk. Of something so unbelievably him and you want to keep that scent close forever.
“I imagine you’re annoyed. But a job is a job.”
“But you still come in here asking for things you know someone else can do,” your panties are soaked, and from the way his nose flares, you know he knows. “Why?”
His teeth grit as you start to grind on him, the feeling giving you an inch of relief that only makes you want more.
“I, I don’t- It’s because I,” the counter began to crack under his hands. His muscles were pulled taut. “Dios, ayúdame.”
Maybe you were wrong, and your hazy mind only brought thoughts from the subconscious one.
“Fine. I get that you don’t like me but could you at least give me some type of relief?” you were whining in his ears at this point, a complete 180 of how you left him earlier today. With every grind of your hips, you left noises in his skin, desperate.
The desk made a terrible sound as Miguel finally lets go and grabs around your waist. Your breath is slammed out of you as your back hits the wall, Miguel’s hand holding your head to stop it from crashing into the wall too.
Your throat makes a gargled sound as Miguel licks down your jaw, his talons ripping into your dress. His tongue swipes into your mouth, breaths rapid as he finally gets a taste.
“I do like you. More than I should,” his words were passed right into you. “You and your smart mouth.”
“Then stop talking and do something about it.”
A yank in your hair stops your complaints, Miguel kissing down your side. Every press of his lips left a chilly flutter. Your hips are moving frantically, patience wearing thin. Right as you’re about to say something again, he flips you, the layers of your dress falling as he rips into your panties.
The blood rushes to your head as he takes a bite into your thigh, sucking as your legs fall to his shoulders.
You moan his name, hands gripping at his thighs. His kisses led to your lips, swollen and dripping. From your clit to your entrance, he groaned as he covered you, drinking like you were water in the middle of the night.
You felt like you were going to slip, but Miguel’s arms were looped around your legs, not letting go. His suit was in your way, your mouth salivating as his crotch stared back at you. Your fingers could only dig as far as his suit allows and you have half a mind to call Lyla to disengage it.
“Please,” you sigh as you rub his bulge with your cheek. “I need it so bad.”
“Cállate,” he hums, face delving deeper into you. The sound of him licking up every drop echos off the cool walls and the light of his suit dims away letting you see what you’ve been waiting for.
His length hits your chin, precum spilling down and you’ve never been more excited for a man to go commando. You open your mouth and let your breath hit him as you take a swipe down to his balls.
Miguel’s grunts and shifts his hips back. His tip swerves around your face as he tries to find your mouth without unlatching his jaw from your sex. You help out with the last bit of sanity you have, and once you wrap your lips around him, his hips snap hard onto you.
All you can feel is Miguel entering you from top to bottom, his hands keeping you stationed in your position. There’s no room to do anything as he’s devouring you and taking your breath away at the same time. Two of his fingers sink into you, and you jerk from the difference between his skin and his tongue.
Miguel nibbles at the hood of your clit, urging you to be still. Whenever his fingers leave you, his pelvis fills your senses. Your throat gags around him, spit building to keep up with his thrusts.
“So good,” he hums. His pace picks up and the tears in your eyes fall to the floor. “Made for me. Only me.”
Your fingers wrap around his thighs and squeeze tight, your vision fading as you try to take in pockets of air. The shake in your legs and the broken moans that escaped your lips only ignited him.
“Bebé,” his hips stutter. He’s sloppy as he drools over the entrance, voice loud. “Bebé, you’re so, ngh.”
He cums down your throat, balls twitching against your face. You close your eyes and try to swallow everything, jaw aching. Miguel groans your name as he slides his dick out to the tip, a few spurts still landing on your lips. You cough, position making everything go north.
The taste of him was delicious, but you needed more of him elsewhere. Your mouth was as drenched as your cunt and yet you still felt empty.
When Miguel flips you back upright, you’re ready to pounce on him again. The state of you both is alarming. Your breasts have completely fallen out of your dress, that black thing barely holding on by its zipper. Miguel’s suit is phasing in and out in the most obscene places. There’s slick up to his eyebrows and his cum is all over your cheeks.
He grabs your jaw and runs his tongue over your face, cleaning up his mess. You let him live in his own bubble before that burning in your core came back.
Your nails dig into his shoulders and your whispers of “more” come to light. You’re clawing at him like a cat begging him to do something, anything, to make this feeling go away.
“Miguel,” you gasp as he sinks his teeth into your skin. “Miguel, it hurts. Fix it, Miggy, please.”
You guide his hands down your body and place them on your ass. His touch sates you for only a moment, but your body reacts as if he needs to be deep in your bones. He spreads your ass and groans as the sound of how eager you are for him follows.
“You’re not ready,” are the words that make you even more frustrated. Your hands pushing and pulling at him, ready to try and put him where you want him to go.
He clicks his teeth and flexes his wrists. His webs tie your wrists together, neon red strings leaving a buzz on your skin. He yanks your dress off and you stumble with the motions.
The clinical room doesn’t aid the building heat you feel, but Miguel turning you around and pressing you into the wall as he cuts the rest of your panties off does.
He squats and grabs two hands full of you.
He spits onto your hole, mesmerized as he watches it slide to your entrance. “Qué hermosa,” he whispers.
You bend, whimpering as your folds cover his nose, clenching and grinding.
“God,” you sigh. Something this small was going to bring you to the edge so quickly. “D-don’t stop.”
“Greedy,” Miguel says as if he’s not moving the fat of your ass to nudge his face into you. The arch in your back deepens as he continues and your whines get higher.
He smacks your right cheek, sound echoing off the metal tables, and you shout his name as you coat his tongue.
Tranquility clears your mind for a second, one where the flowery scent in the air is less strong.
The peace leaves just as fast as it came when Miguel gets rid of his suit and stands behind you in all of his glory.
His eyes followed from your dewey face to the curve of your hips to bitten thighs to feet with one heel still on.
“He didn’t deserve to see this,” he says.
“W-what?”
Miguel ignores you and pulls your wrists up straight, a confused noise leaving you. He wraps another web around your ankles and huffs. He sets your arms under your chest, your hands in front of you like a prayer.
When he picks you up by your waist, his dick lines up with your ass.
He groans as he grinds, watching himself disappear and reappear.
You try to move with him, “No, not there. Inside.”
“You’re always so distracting,” he growls. He slides his length between your thick thighs and you nearly scream as his hips hit your ass, his tip just barely passing over your clit. “Can never think straight when I see you.”
He rubbed over the bite he left on your shoulder, “So pretty. My pretty baby.”
His low voice right in your ears only made you wetter. He was holding you like you were his toy, fucking the inside of your thighs with ease.
Miguel could cry watching your ass bounce on his stomach. Your legs were soft and warm and he just couldn’t stop.
“Want you so bad. Need to fuck you again and again and again,” he said as your thighs quivered around him.
“Please, Miguel. Make me yours,” your voice crowded the sound of his grunts as he held you up and pounded away.
Those were the magic words to get him to lean back with a firm grip on you and release all over the wall. It was everywhere, from your legs to the wall to the ceiling.
He set you to the floor with shaky arms, and you started to sob.
All of this and you still wanted more. If this was making you feel this insane, you can only imagine the small relief Miguel was feeling after being exposed for longer.
“C’mere,” he pulls you to the bare floor and cuts the webs. You immediately try to climb him, legs wrapping around his waist.
He was painfully hard for someone who came twice now.
Your cries of “inside” slur together, tears running down your face. Miguel was no better, fangs dripping with venom and the hairs on skin raised.
The two of you tussle as Miguel tries to keep your hips to stay stationary. You kept jerking in order to get some sort of friction but he was baring his teeth to get you to quit.
You dip your nails into his shoulders and arms while he drags a talon down your sternum to snap your bra off.
A clatter of your stiletto sounds off across the room as he pinches your thigh, “Easy, beautiful. Let me take care of you, yeah?”
“Fucking hurry,” you whine.
He shushes as he plunges inside of you, the noise you both make as loud as a choir.
Your eyes roll back as Miguel presses, bending your body in half.
“You’re going to be the death of me,” Miguel leans to whisper onto your lips.
Tight is the first thing that comes to mind and heat is the next.
He moves his hips up and slams back down, your ass shifting from the pressure.
“Miguel!”
“That’s it. Talk to me.” All of that chatter earlier and now you can barely get out a word.
“H-harder,” your hands don’t know where to go. They’re grabbing Miguel, they’re falling next to your head, they’re grabbing at your breasts as Miguel jerks your body.
Miguel goes to open your jaw, lips pulling on your tongue to suck. It’s tender and sensual compared to the way his balls are slapping against you. There’s a ring of white on his shaft getting thicker and thicker as he continues.
“Pretty thing,” he says as he lets your tongue go, a string of saliva falling to your neck. “Watched you on the cameras. Always.”
That stirs something in you, a spark in your chest as you see stars.
“Did you want to do this to me when you watched me?” you manage out.
“Yes.”
“I can put on a show for you next time.”
“Yes.”
“You can come in here. ‘N fuck me over the counter.”
“Sí, sí, baby,” his hands push your knees next to your head and he ruts against you. His thighs were straining as he took and took.
A yell pulls itself from your core, that burning feeling getting a crash of cold water. The dam bursts and you’re running all over Miguel, essence leaving every time he inches out and back in.
“Gonna fill you up,” he rasps, eyes glazed over.
You nod your head, clenching and pulsing around him.
His eyes don’t leave yours as he shudders against you. You suck him in, gaining a deep moan from him, “Así, bebé. Take it.”
It’s like you can finally think as his cum overflows, your heart rate finally slowing.
He stares at you as you both come back to reality. Your body is limp, the weight of Miguel making itself known.
“Holy shit,” you wiggle and he catches the hint. He lifts a bit and pulls out. The swirl of you two falls out of you in waves. “What. The fuck.”
“God,” Miguel mumbles. “No shocking way we just did that.”
“You can’t say that when the evidence is leaking out of me.”
Miguel groans as he watches you, your face pouty and your hole glistening. It was intoxicating.
His dick twitches, coming to life again the longer he watches.
“‘M sorry in advance,” he says as he pulls you into his lap.
“Just take care of it, O’Hara.”
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The two of you sat in the middle of the floor, breathing hard. Pieces of consciousness were starting to come back.
“You looked stunning tonight,” Miguel said. He looked at your shredded dress on the floor. “I’m glad he won’t see you in that dress anymore.”
The snort that leaves your nose turns into a full-blown laugh.
“What’s so funny?”
“You just took my soul ten times over and you’re worried about a guy I just met less than a week ago. I fear I’m ruined for anyone else.”
“Oh,” he smiles. “Good.”
“You still should take me on a date. You’ve got a lot to explain.”
Flashes of him confessing to his habit of watching you from afar come back, “O-of course.”
“And you owe me a new dress.”
“On it.”
Lyla pops up next to you both, a blindfold over her shades, “Is it safe to talk to you guys now?”
Miguel checks his gizmo, “I think we’re good for about forty minutes. The effects are starting to wear off.”
“Excellent!” She throws the fabric to the side, “Oh my god, this room is a mess.”
You look at the array of substances over the room and grimace. The entire hall will have to be on lockdown.
“Well, I managed to vent out the solution. You two should be ok soon.”
You lean on Miguel’s chest and close your eyes, happy to hear good news.
“Kind of sad that this is what it took for you to confess, Miguel,” she comments.
“Lyla!”
You laugh again, “Some confession.”
“That’s enough,” Miguel scowls.
Your giggles die down as you pull yourself onto Miguel’s thigh, bubbles in your chest molding into moans as you start to grind over his thigh.
“I’m starting to think you guys are just bluffing,” Lyla gags before she disappears. “Let me know when you’re done.”
“I think,” you nuzzle into his neck, “this’ll be the last time. I’m tired.”
“If not, we can take it to my house.”
The world blurs again as you and Miguel connect under the white lights.
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Take a shot every time I say breath or breathe 😭. Anywho, as always, if you enjoyed, please like, reblog, and COMMENT!
574 notes · View notes
freakyformula · 1 month ago
Text
First time with the Lion
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Summary: Reader is scared to lose her virginity but Max is the best boyfriend and helps her along the way.
Writers comment: The amount of hours I've put into this fucking fic...
Warnings: 18+, MDNI, swear words, oral (both receiving), loss of virginity, creampie, google translated dutch
Word count: 4,4k
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You stood outside Max's apartment, waiting for him to come home. You had forgotten your keys and he was rushing back from the gym to let you in. You told him that you'd go back to your apartment to get the keys but Max was having none of it. You and Max had been seeing each other for a year by now, and he had given you the keys to his home a couple of months into dating.
"I'm sorry for taking so long, I ran as fast as I could." He pants as he sees you when he steps out of the elevator.
"Max, it's been like 5 minutes, it's not like I'll die just because I have to wait for you." You mutter to him while you rub his arm.
He opens the door for you, kisses your forehead, and returns to the gym to complete his daily workout.
You lounge on the sofa for a bit before you feel your stomach grumbling. You walk to the kitchen and realise that the fridge is full of food, unusual for Max, considering he doesn't cook, you think.
It's already dusk and you've started preparing dinner for the two of you when he gets home.
As soon as Max sees you in the kitchen his lips form into a wide smile. He walks up to you and hugs you from behind.
"Hmmm, smells good. What are you making?"
"Penne alla vodka with chicken." You state, suspecting that Max didn't understand one word you just uttered. You smirk at him, "Pasta with tomato sauce, basically."
In response, he nods and continues to observe you while you work on the pasta.
"So… What do you want to do tonight, Y/N?" He suddenly asks.
"I was thinking we could stay in?"
"Sounds good to me…" He grabs your hips and presses himself against you, tickling your face and neck with light kisses. You can feel his hard-on through the fabric of your clothes.
While having supper, you make plans for the next racing weekend. You were not accustomed to the busy paddock, but Max was. Even though you had attended a few races and hidden in the grandstands with other fans, it was all new to you. It was important to maintain a low profile because you and Max had not yet gone public.
When you're done, and as you're finishing up the dishes, you feel his touch behind you again.
"Touchy today, are we?" You ask.
"Hmmmm…" He hums.
And with that, he easily lifts you up on his shoulder, carries you to the sofa, and lays you down with the utmost care.
He places himself between your legs as you part them for him, and he lets out a barely audible groan. He looks you deep in the eyes as he leans in to kiss you.
He begins stroking and kneading his way down your arms, chest, hips, and hands as soon as you start making out.
Max knows you're a virgin, you had told him when he took your makeout session too far once. Turns out he had already assumed you were because of the purity ring you were wearing.
Before you met Max, you'd been focusing on your studies, which meant little time for anything else. Your family was also extremely religious and anything considered sexual was forbidden before marriage.
While you and Max had done some stuff already, like seeing and touching each other while naked, you hadn't really gone further than that, the reason being your inexperience.
"Is this okay?" Max asks as he supports himself on his elbow, admiring your beauty only a few centimeters away from you. You could feel his breath on you, and he was panting heavily.
You spend the rest of the evening cuddling on the sofa, later moving to the bed to finish an episode of your favorite series.
In the days after, Max couldn't keep his hands off you. After that night, you waited for the opportunity to ask him about his intentions. It seemed as though the nature of the relationship had changed. Max had planned a romantic dinner at one of Monaco's top restaurants, followed by a stroll around the harbour to watch the sunset.
You sat on the balcony of the restaurant and enjoyed the food and each other.
You were wearing a floral midi dress and he was rocking a pair of beige shorts and a blue button-up.
When you considered yourself done, you slowly started walking towards the harbour.
The evening was beautiful, with the sky shining in all sorts of different colours.
You inhaled deeply and gathered your thoughts. The nerves were almost getting to you. Max flung his arms over you to try and warm you up, so he must have noticed how much you were shaking.
"Max… I need to ask you something." You begin, "About last week, did something happen that night when we cuddled? You've been acting strange ever since."
He turns to look at you and takes a deep sigh. You can see his face frown, seemingly deep in thought.
"Y/N, you know I love you. All I want is to treat you well and avoid causing you harm. But lately, you've turned me on so badly, and I'm afraid that expressing how much I need you would just harm you. He glances up at you, relieved to have voiced what was on his mind.
"Oh, Max…" You lean in, give his lips a peck, and rest your head on his arm, happy with the fact that he'd confessed his feelings.
"I don't want to rush, it's not like that at all. But I can't keep pretending like I'm not turned on by you." Max admits.
You look up at him and smile, "That makes two of us."
The look he gives you is so hilarious, it makes you giggle.
"D-do you mean that…?" He asks with big eyes.
"Yes… I have a suggestion, why don't we go back to your place and you can show me just how turned on you are?"
The whole walk home, Max holds your hand tightly, almost as if he's afraid of losing you on the way. As soon as he closes the door behind you, his lips are on yours. Max stumbles out of his shorts and you unbutton his shirt, and he helps you with your dress.
When it touches the ground and you're standing in only underwear before him, you cross your arms, afraid and uncomfortable. Max softly grabs your hands and softly bends your arms open, letting him see you fully.
"You're exquisite, Y/N. Never claim otherwise. Can I touch you?" He carefully asks.
You nod and he starts by sliding his hands up your arms, to your collarbones, and down to your chest. You let out a small whimper when you feel him move down to your hips.
The sounds of your family telling you about waiting for marriage and the importance of abstinence rang in your ears and you panicked. You back off and leave Max confused. He quickly makes his way up to you and holds your face.
The same thing had happened before; you desperately wanted to take the next step with Max, confident that he was your soulmate, but your conscience would not let you.
"It's okay, Y/N. We don't have to go further than this." He says, hoping to cheer you up.
"But… I want to. I want you."
"Then what's stopping you? I'm here."
And it's as if all the morals you've ever stored in your body melted away.
You felt ready, even if it would take time to get used to this. Anything sexual being sinful was all you knew of growing up.
You lean in and kiss his lips softly, daring to touch his shoulders. As the kiss deepens, you move your hands to his chest, and down to his stomach. You feel him mimicking your movements, giving you control that way. Without breaking the kiss, he starts to steer you towards the bedroom.
Once you reach the second-story staircase, Max picks you up into his strong arms, causing you to yelp. Max lays you down on the bed with care and follows, placing himself on top.
"How far are you ready to go, Y/N?" He asks.
"I don't know yet, but I'm okay so far. Just keep going."
"Can I take these off?" He asks, gazing down at the bra and panties.
You nod.
"First off, words. You need to use words for this to work, it's for our safety and well-being." He explains.
"Okay… y-yes." You stutter.
"Good girl." He smiles at you and starts placing kisses on your naked skin, that nickname making you absolutely feral.
He starts peppering kisses on your mouth and works his way down to your neck, and further to your covered breasts. He unbuckles your bra and helps you with the straps. The hunger in his eyes when he sees your bare chest is something you've never felt before. He dives down and begins sucking on the sensitive peaks.
Where his mouth isn't, his hands are, caressing you. You let out a moan and Max follows your lead. He lets out a moan and looks at your lust-filled eyes. He takes it as a sign to continue further down. When he grabs your panties and slides them down, you clench your legs together in order to avoid exposing yourself. Max, of course, doesn't accept that and opens them up again. He gasps at the sight, and bends down, placing kisses along your inner thighs.
"Can I touch you here?" He checks in.
"Yes, please."
"Good girl." He chuckles and leans into your heat. He dives in and starts licking, sucking, and teasing your entrance. He soon adds his hands to the mix, with his fingers flicking your clit while his tongue works the rest of your pussy. You feel your orgasm building up quickly, you're feeling ecstatic but your parents lecturing is pestering your mind and you can't help but whimper and move back from his care.
"I-I'm scared." You admit, on the brink of tears.
Max tuts, lies down next to you and holds you while you calm down again.
"I know this is a big step for you, Y/N, but you're doing so well, and we won't go any further than you're ready to."
He rubs your shoulder languidly until you let him know that you're ready again. He goes down again, but this time, he only uses his fingers.
"Does this feel good, mijn schat?" He checks in.
"Oh shit, don't stop." You force out, bucking your hips and lifting your legs over his shoulders.
He works your clit like a pro, and you feel an unfamiliar knot in your stomach.
What is happening? You thought. Before you know it, the knot snaps, and you scream out the first orgasm of your life.
You pant heavily and look at Max, who smirks down at you, clearly pleased with his work.
"So that's what it feels like…" you say.
"Are you okay?" He asks.
"Honestly, I've never been better. Thank you, Max."
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A couple of weeks pass and you repeat the same routine every night you spend together. He's giving you at least one orgasm per day.
You started feeling selfish, yearning to give him the same treatment back but not knowing how to bring it up with him.
You wait patiently for him to make the move, but he never asks. Being the gentleman he is, he doesn't want to pressure you.
"Max, tonight I want to make you feel good too." You say as he makes his way down your stomach to your already sopping core.
He slowly looks up at you in shock. Never could he believe that you'd be comfortable pleasuring him this soon. You could see the outline of his manhood in his briefs as he sat up.
"Are you sure about this? You don't have to, I'm enjoying giving you pleasure and I don't mind keeping it that way." He asks, but behind that caring gaze is a look that you can't place, it's like a fire out of control.
"No." You say as you grab his wrist. "I want to do this."
"Okay. Let's switch positions." And with that, you find yourself on your knees.
"Ready? You can start by touching me, and getting used to the feel and how I react to your touch."
"Like this?" You ask as you take his member into your hands, feeling and studying him, and rubbing up and down his length.
"Yes, Y/N. Just like that, oh god, don't stop."
When you touch the head of his throbbing and leaking dick he lets out a moan.
"Do you like that?" You smile up at him.
"God, yes." He responds.
You continue stimulating him with your hands, and when he announces that he's close you bend down, and give the tip a lick. He's bucking his hips at this point, desperate to come.
"Don't stop, Y/N, please." And you continue pumping him with your hands and you take the head into your mouth, sucking down on it. With each bob of your head, you take more of him into your mouth.
"Where do you want my seed?" He asks desperately.
With your mouth full of dick you only look up at him, and when he comes a few seconds later, he pulls you off him, but leaving you at close proximity. He pumps his cock which starts twitching and splurting out white streaks of cum. You've placed your face under him and feel the warmth on your face as he pumps out every last drop of his fluid.
"Y/N, that was fantastic, you're fantastic! Such a good girl for me…" He praises you as he cleans the sticky mess off your face.
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Miami.
You'd spend your time at the grandstands as usual, all to avoid getting associated with your boyfriend. You didn't feel like it was time to make your relationship public yet, Max would love to to make your love for each other official, but you didn't want to because of the tendency to get called out as a gold digger by the so-called fans.
It was warm, insufferably warm. You wore a flowy white sundress but were still sweating.
You were there with the other fans to cheer Max on as he drove past the checkered flag in the first place and yelled his name when he stood on the podium and heard the Dutch anthem as you had many times before, both at home but also when you'd attended races before.
Max and you shared the hotel room, much to your pleasure. You arrived before him, because of the interviews and briefings he had to do after the race. After you stepped into the room, you undressed and threw yourself onto the bed, naked. You were sticky and sweaty from the warm and humid weather. Getting yourself freshened up felt fitting, so you poured yourself a bath and sank in. The cooler water felt like heaven as you scrubbed your body clean.
You had no idea how long you stayed in that bath, but it must have been quite long because when you were in the process of drying off, you heard Max arriving.
"I'm in here!" You yell as you see Max peeking in through the door.
"Hi, my love." He tuts as you try to cover yourself up.
"Congrats on the win!" You smile at him.
"Thank you, schat. Now, what do you say about a special celebration?"
Slowly, he grabs the towel and lets it fall to the floor. His breath hitches when he sees your naked body.
"Ohhh… This is exactly what I was looking forward to when I walked up to the room."
For what seems like an eternity, you stand there while Max simply takes in your beauty. You cross your arms in order to cover yourself up.
"No, no, baby. Let me see you."
You both take deep breaths as you process your current experience. With each passing second, you can feel your core becoming increasingly hot.
"Max… Need you."
"Do you now?" He asks, with admiration in his eyes.
He steers your body towards the bedroom without breaking eye contact, analysing your facial expression as if he's afraid to accidentally overstep a boundary.
"You decide what we do today, liefje, I'm just your guide."
You stand there for a moment, considering your next move carefully. You sit down on the edge of the king-size bed. Max follows and sits down next to you, unable to keep his hands to himself. His hands are caressing your hands, arms, thighs, face, anywhere he could reach.
It didn't seem fair that you were sitting naked while he was fully clothed.
You straddle him in order to get closer. He seems surprised by your sudden confidence and pulls you impossibly closer to his warm body.
You lift his shirt gently and start tracing his stomach. Your touch leaves goosebumps along his skin, and he closes his eyes.
"Feels so good, sweetheart." He admits.
You remove his tee and begin working on his belt to remove the skinny jeans as well. The pace is slow; you take your time with one another. Max gently touches your sides as you unbutton his jeans. He assists you in removing them, leaving you to admire the magnificence of his body in front of you. Your gaze travels down to his growing member, making you look away.
"Come here." Max encourages you.
As you lie down next to him, he moves halfway over you, placing his leg in between yours. He places soft kisses along your jawline, along the edges of your mouth, along your eyebrows, along your collarbone.
"Is this okay?" He asks.
"Y-yeah." You nod as you pull his head closer to you. He moves down to your exposed breasts and starts sucking on the hardened nipples. His tongue caresses your tits and you feel your heat dripping in anticipation.
"Oh god, Maxie, need more." You comment.
"Patience, love." Max smirks.
His statement makes you groan, looking away from him, trying to cover yourself up.
"You're okay." He smiles as he continues massaging and sucking on your tits. The purple and red marks he leaves will be visible for days but you don't care at the moment.
His mouth finds your stomach, and there too, he leaves marks. When he reaches your mound, he stops.
"Can I go further?" He checks in.
"Yes, please, Maxie!" You instantly reply, sounding desperate.
Max hums and gives your mound a couple of appreciative kisses.
He moves down to your heat, and as you already knew, your juices were already leaking. You feel his heavy breaths on your clit, and Max stays there for a while, relishing in the sight of your pussy.
Then, out of nowhere, he plunges in.
The way he circles your clit causes you to buck your hips up and down again. He pushes down on your stomach and grounds you, continuing to eat your pussy. He teases your entrance with his tongue, opening you up a little.
"Taste so sweet…" He whispers under his breath.
Max has learnt what works for you these last weeks, and in 5 minutes you've had your first orgasm for the night.
You squeeze your eyes shut in pleasure, completely out of breath. Your chest keeps heaving up and down despite your best efforts to find your breath again, but just as you're about to fill your lungs with air, Max laps around your clit.
When he inserts a finger, you yelp.
"Shhhh, it's only my finger."
He curls his finger up towards your sweet spot and you yell out.
"Hngh, gonna cum again…" You manage to say in a strenuous tone.
Hearing that, Max starts sucking and pumping into you harder, and within a couple of seconds you're pushed over the edge once again.
You yell out your spasms and Max pauses, knowing you easily get overstimulated after cumming.
"More, more, more…" You chant.
"Do you want to go all the way, Y/N?"
"Yes, yes, yes, Maxie." And with that, you sit up, pushing him onto the bed.
You take his length into your hands and pump him a couple of times to see how he reacts to your touch. He looks up at you with blown eyes, giving you a wide smile. When you pump him a little harder though, his mouth turns into an O shape.
"Treating me so good, princess."
"Yeah? What about if I do this?" You ask and take his tip into your mouth. As you hollow your cheeks, you hear Max groan loudly but you're too occupied with taking his cock further into your mouth. You bend down a little further until you're on the limit of gagging. You don't dare to go lower. Max gives you an approving look, making sure that you're okay.
Your velvety soft cheeks must've driven Max incredibly close to the edge because you feel his cock twitch in your mouth. You can feel the salty precum on your tongue.
Oh lord, what if your parents found out what you were doing at the moment? They would disown you for sure.
You release his member from your mouth and brush the drool away with the back of your hand.
"Do you think you're ready for me?" He coos.
You stay quiet, pondering your answer carefully. You roll the ring around your finger nervously.
"J-just be careful." You stutter to him.
"Of course, my love." He whispers back as he places you on your back.
"Spread your legs for me." He asks of you while he pumps his cock.
You lift your knees up and slowly spread your legs a little.
"A little more." He demands. You spread them a few centimeters more before you close them shut again in embarrassment.
Max quickly finds himself at your side, peppering you with kisses and praise.
"Liefje, I know this isn't easy for you. I know your parent's lectures are plaguing your mind at the moment. But I just need you to know how incredibly beautiful you are and how turned on I am by you. Here, let me help you…" He says and spreads your legs with his hands. "There you go, good girl."
"I-I'm scared." You admit.
"What are you scared of?"
"The pain?" You ask yourself. You didn't really know what you were scared of, but it was eating you alive at the moment.
"As long as you relax and breathe, you'll be fine." Max comforts. "Ready?"
"Y-yeah." You nod.
He lifts your legs over his strong arms and pulls you closer to him. He pushes a finger into your pussy, and soon adds another one. The stretch scares you at first but you adjust after a couple of gentle pumps. Then, a third one. That's when you start to panic; if you're in this much pain now, how much more will you experience when Max fucks you?
But Max is good, and he slightly pulls back his fingers and slowly pushes them in again, opening you gradually.
When you feel his tip against your opening, you think of what he just told you. Relax and breathe.
"I'll push the tip in first, sweetheart, let me know if it's too much. Breathe with me."
When he lines up with your entrance, you look up at him. He looks like a god like this. Your gazes meet, and you start to breathe together. When he places his tip against you and gives it a little push, you feel a jolt of pain between your legs and yelp by pure instinct.
"You're okay, it's just the tip."
You cry out as Max stays put where he is. He looks down and concludes that the tip is indeed inside.
The face you make when he pushes into you a little further seems to worry him. You can't breathe, can't move, can't speak. The pain is too much to handle.
Max pulls out a little in order to let you recover. You've adjusted well to his tip, you can't feel any pain when just the tip is in.
"Do you want to continue?" Max asks.
"Of course I want to! I'm not backing down now." You exclaim.
Max pushes into you a little further while he caresses your hips. He watches your face in pity.
All of a sudden, after adjusting to his size, the pain subsides and as he's pumping into you, you feel pleasure. You gasp at the feeling of him inside you.
When he bottoms out, you both moan into each others mouths as you kiss.
"So tight for me, schat." He whispers in your ear.
You only groan as an answer, too overwhelmed to form any words. His pace is slow at first, but after checking in with you, his thrusts pick up in speed.
His hips piston into yours and you cry out another orgasm, lightening something within you. Your body is completely limp at this point, exhaustion evident in everything you say and do.
He grabs your hands, places them above your head, and holds them down with his bigger hands. Not that you'd have the energy to move your hands anyway.
His pace is relentless, fucking into you at an unforgiving pace.
"Turn around." He says as he guides you on your hands and knees.
Agonizingly slowly, he pushes into you again, taking care not to hurt you. This position makes you feel everything even more. As if things weren't intense enough, Max moves his hand down to your clit, circling it with his fingers.
"Where do you want my cum?" He asks.
You hadn't even considered this. "What about… In me? I'm on the pill, you know that."
"Hmmm… Classic." You and Max chuckle together.
Max does as you ask and spills his seed impossibly deep within you, chest heaving against yours. All you know is him for what feels like an eternity.
Your chests are heaving against each other, both of you out of breath.
You can't help letting out a small whimper when Max parts from you. You collapse on the bed from exhaustion.
You hear Max in the bathroom, and decide to check on him. When you're about to enter you crash into him.
"Oh! Sorry, I was just about to come get you. I'm running a bath for you, and I've brought a towel if you want to clean yourself up."
You spend the rest of the night talking while Max helps you bathe.
You grab the purity ring on your finger and throw it on the nightstand, not caring about either the ring or your parents opinions anymore.
You fall asleep comfortably, knowing that you were brave enough to finally do it. You finally surrendered yourself to the man you love and adore.
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thebenjiblackwoodexpress · 4 months ago
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Devil's Snare part.2
Aemond Targaryen x Reader
Description: Having realised that he's fallen in love with his handmaiden, Aemond tries to sway her heart to him despite her shy and introverted disposition. But he quickly finds that her heart is not easily won. Can the Prince succeed in winning his Lady with an unlikely combination of books, Vhagar, and advice from his sister Helaena.
Part 1 Part 3
Writer's note: thank you to everyone who read and enjoyed part 1. Hoping this doesn't stray too far from the direction you want it to go in. I have another part planned but would also welcome suggestions :)
Warnings: female reader, dual-pov narrative, slow-burn, mention of Granny Vhagar (she deserves her own trigger warning), lots of angst and lots of fluff too, pining, potentially ooc Aemond (although our Lord and saviour Ewan Mitchell agrees he's really just a Teddy Bear). Lengthy as always because if there's one thing I can't do it's get to the point.
Y/N huffed in frustration as she tried to replicate the braided hairstyle Helaena's handmaiden had shown her to little success. She tended to wear her hair in the same practical style each day, not having much skill in this regard. But her newfound intimacy with the Princess had led her to a friendship with her maid, who had a particular skill for elaborate hairstyles. Realising she would be late to her morning duties should she restart, she tied off the braid and set off for Prince Aemond's chambers. In truth, she now preferred to arrive at the Prince's chambers early so she could greet him for the day before he headed off to the training yard and she wouldn't see him again until that evening.
They had come to form what Y/N supposed could be considered a friendship, if any such relationship could exist between a servant and a Prince. Though she could not help her natural timidity, which prevented her from ever feeling truly comfortable in his presence and often prone to stuttering over her words. Prince Aemond seemed more than willing to accommodate this facet of her personality. He always listened to her so attentively, never interrupting her when she stumbled over her words as others often did in frustration.
With the gentle encouragement of Prince Aemond and his sister the Princess Helaena, Y/N had slowly begun to come more and more out of her shell. She recalled only a few nights ago how the Prince had made her laugh so carelessly, completely forgetting her introverted tendencies. He had been kind enough to lend her books from his private collection as she became more comfortable with reading under Helaena's guidance, and he had explicitly told her to select any that should interest her. As she was dusting the upper shelves in his chambers one evening she'd reached for an ornate tome of red leather that she could now tell concerned dragons. Y/N had always been fascinated with the creatures, thinking them godlike and otherworldly and was eager to learn more about them now that this was possible. It took a few attempts of her reaching as far as she could on tiptoe for her fingertips to even graze the spine of the book, it being on the top shelf and Y/N eventually resorted to jumping for it to no avail. Giving up with a huff to blow the hair that had escaped from her braid out of her face, she startled to see a hand reach for the book she'd wanted.
It had amused Aemond no small amount to see his handmaiden's ill fated attempts to reach the book she wanted from his shelves but he'd quickly stepped towards her as she'd made a jump for it, not wishing her to do anything which might cause her injury. He felt a satisfying sense of pride at being able to be of assistance to her, extending his own arm for the red book which he easily reached with his tall stature. It gratified him to feel she might have need of him and that he could be someone she looked to. Handing it out to her, he smiled encouragingly as he saw what volume had taken her interest this time. "So it is dragons you wish to read of? Have they long held your interest Y/N?" Taking the book from him, Y/N's eyes lit with a spark of uncontained excitement Aemond had rarely seen in his handmaiden. "I have since I was a young girl, they are such magnificent creatures. So beautiful and yet so powerful."
Humming in agreement at her assessment, Aemond's smile only grew as he leaned his head closer to her. "Would you like to meet one? I should be glad to introduce you to mine own, Vhagar." Y/N's face paled slightly at his suggestion. "I think I would be terrified if I were to actually meet a dragon in the flesh, My Prince. But I thank you for your most generous offer." Aemond feigned a pensive look for a moment. "I wouldn't be so sure of that, Y/N the fierce dragon rider has a certain ring to it? Does it not?" Aemond's heart swelled at the sweet sound of her laughter, the laughter he had provoked from his shy girl. And yet, he wished her to know that she would never have been in any danger had she taken him up on his offer, Vhagar would heed his commands and surely sense the importance this girl held for her rider. Looking at her earnestly as her laughter quietened, he spoke in a tone he hoped would convey the truth of his words. "You would always be safe with me, Y/N."
Y/N felt her heart flutter at the memory of Prince Aemond's words and as she passed along the halls of the Red Keep she briefly wondered what the Prince might think of her new hairstyle. She almost scoffed at herself for the ridiculousness of the thought, unsure of where it had even come from. As if the Prince should ever think of her hair, or indeed think of her at all when she was gone from his sight. Y/N looked down to ensure she did not trip in her haste as she neared the Prince's chambers. Just as she rounded the corner to his chambers she collided with a hard figure, letting out a yelp and closing her eyes tightly as she braced for a fall. Arms quickly wrapped around her to stop her momentum, one encircling her waist, the other wrapping around her shoulders. Y/N opened her eyes to find it was the Prince Aemond himself holding her and she smiled sheepishly up at him in embarrassment at the situation they found themselves in.
"I apologise My Prince, I was not looking where I was going." Quirking his lip up at her, Aemond pulled Y/N back up but maintained a gentle hold on her elbows to steady her. "I am only glad I was here to catch you little one." Y/N blushed at that and turned away from him slightly to hide it. A second later the Prince had let go of her entirely, taking a step back.
"I will see you later, Y/N."
Y/N tried to look anywhere but at Prince Aemond's eyes as she nodded.
"Yes, My Prince. I wish you a good day."
The Prince wasted no time in turning on his heels to stalk away from her and she could not help but feel that perhaps she had made him angry.
Aemond had waited in his chambers longer than was usual that morning, hoping to catch even a brief glimpse of his pretty handmaiden before he left to spend the day training with Ser Criston. He'd noticed she had begun to arrive earlier at his chambers and he felt hope surge in him that perhaps she sought him out, that she might enjoy their conversations as he did. When she did not show and he could tarry no longer he let out a growl of frustration and practically stormed from his room. Coming round a corner at such a great speed Aemond's eyes widened in alarm as he smacked straight into the very girl who consumed his thoughts. Quickly wrapping his arms around her so she would not fall, he frantically ran his eyes down her form to reassure himself he had not hurt her.
Aemond was momentarily stunned as Y/N opened her eyes and graced him with a sweet smile that had him tightening his hold on her, relishing the feeling of holding her in his arms. He scoffed inwardly at her apology, he had been only too happy to catch her, and had hoped to amuse her with his playful response. But as her cheeks reddened to a deep scarlet and she turned her face away from him, he relented. He pulled her to stand upright, though he could not help maintaining a light hold on her elbows in case she should stumble. Aemond did so love to see her blush, having convinced himself it must mean he had some power to affect her as she did him. But he did not wish to embarass her and cause her to put any more distance between them. He felt keenly that there was a wide enough chasm already.
The Prince tried to keep his tone even and remove any hint of the frustration he felt. He had begun to fear the worst, that Y/N would never feel truly comfortable with him, and if that were the case how could she ever learn to love him? Was he truly so displeasing to her, so terrifying? Anger coursed through his veins at the blow he had been dealt by the Seven in losing his eye, a disfigurement which he feared would also cost him the love of the woman before him, which he had come to covet above all else. Not wishing to show his already timid handmaiden his anger, he took his leave quickly.
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Y/N gnawed on her bottom lip in her anxiety. She'd been stewing the entire day over her brief meeting with Prince Aemond that morning and inwardly cursing herself for her reaction to his simply helping her. It had clearly angered him, though she knew not why. She found herself wishing she were not so timid, that she could meet his gaze more easily, not stutter so much when she spoke to him. But the Seven had made her so and she could not see her natural disposition disappearing anytime soon. Nevertheless, she endeavoured to present a more welcoming figure when he returned to his chambers that evening and mend any infraction she had inadvertently caused.
As Prince Aemond reentered his chambers for the evening, Y/N turned to greet him with a warm smile lighting her face. "Good evening, My Prince. I trust you had a pleasant day." Y/N often greeted him as such, and the Prince would always readily respond with details of his training with the knight Ser Criston. She had hoped that falling into their normal routine would smooth over any irritation he might still feel towards her, but the smile fell from her face as he only continued to stand in the doorway staring at her. They passed a few moments in silence before Aemond spoke, so softly she had to strain to hear him. "You've changed your hair." That had been the last thing she'd expected him to say to her and she felt her heartbeat increase at the fact that he had noticed.
"The Princess Helaena had her maid show me some braiding techniques when I expressed an interest. She is kind to me."
"It is lovely." At Prince Aemond's words Y/N felt her cheeks burn and butterflies erupt in her stomach. But she forced herself not to shy away from his complement, lest she offend him as she had that morning.
"Thank you, My Prince. I am glad you should think so." Aemond's already handsome features lit up in a genuine smile, seemingly content at her accepting his compliment.
"You are always lovely."
Y/N's mouth parted slightly in surprise. Complimenting a change in hairstyle was one thing, calling her lovely another entirely. She could not understand his motivation for such a compliment, and felt immediately suspicious of it, despite the wild beating of her treacherous heart. She was just a servant girl, and could not possibly hope to have any claim to the heart of a Prince, so what did he mean by calling her lovely? Not knowing how to respond for the best,  Y/N bystepped his words altogether and cleared her throat awkwardly. "I had the wine you requested brought up, it is on the console, and the books you requested brought from the library are on your desk. Will there be anything else this evening, My Prince?"
Y/N watched with regret as the Prince visibly stiffened at her cold tone, his eyebrows furrowed slightly in confusion. "That will be all, Y/N."
"My Prince", with a deferential curtsy she strode past Prince Aemond. Y/N quickly grew ashamed of her suspicion in him and her subsequent rudeness as she saw him cast his head down and shift to let her pass.
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"I cannot sway her heart to me, Sister. Everytime I believe I have made progress, it is quickly followed by another mistake on my part which only seems to push her farther away from me." Aemond had sought his sister's advice, following his disastrous attempt at complimenting Y/N. He feared he had only made her uncomfortable given her cold reaction. He felt pained at the possibility it was him she found so objectionable, as opposed to an ill advised compliment.
Helaena looked thoughtful as she considered her brother's words. "What have you attempted so far to win her affections, brother?"
Aemond reccounted everything he had tried to do to make Y/N more comfortable around him. He'd hoped to build a friendship with her at first as a conduit for expressing his true romantic affections for her at a time when she would be more amenable to this.
He watched as Helaena pondered for an agonisingly long time on the correct response. But as a woman he expected she would be able to find a solution more ably than he could. "I think you should find a way to spend more time with her. You say it is normally only in the mornings and the evenings that you are together for a very brief time. Perhaps with more time spent in your company she will grow accustomed to your attentions and develop her own affections for you in turn." Aemond thought Helaena's suggestion wise and one he should have considered earlier. All this time he had been so concerned with ensuring he did not overstep any lines with Y/N, so very aware of her shy disposition, that he had not tried to orchestrate any more interactions than those she was already used to. But perhaps he needed to try a more direct approach to win his handmaiden over to him. He quickly developed a plan Helaena would have rejected out of hand had he voiced it.
For the second time that day, Y/N was frantically preparing tea in the kitchens, nestled in the lower levels of the Red Keep. Careless in her haste, she accidentally tipped some of the hot water she'd been pouring onto her hand. Letting out a string of curses, she quickly applied some cold water until she could no longer feel the sting so keenly, then hurried to set the already cooling tea on a tray, aware of the distance between the kitchens and the royal chambers where she needed to be. Prince Aemond had started to ask for tea to be brought to him twice a day about a week ago, having never expressed any inclination for it before. It did create some challenges for Y/N in trying to ensure the Prince's tea was delivered to him hot, all the while having to cross such a great distance in the Keep to do so.
And yet he always asked her to sit with him as he drank his tea, asking her various questions about herself, her childhood, her likes and dislikes. His line of questioning was often quite strange to Y/N, asking her what colours she liked best, whether she preferred the colder or warmer months, what flowers were her favourite. She had not thought any of these things about her should interest a Targaryen Prince. But she could not find it in herself to be irritated with his regular requests for tea, as she had come to look forward to these moments with Aemond. She did not know when she'd begun to think of him so informally, as Aemond rather than the Prince. It seemed to occur naturally over time as their tentative friendship grew and she spent more time in his presence. If Y/N was being completely honest with herself she'd even begun to harbour somewhat romantic feelings for the Prince. Blushing every time he met her gaze or their fingers grazed as she handed him his tea, she was sure he'd find her ridiculous if he should ever find out.
Rushing into his chambers, aware she'd taken much longer to deal with her burn, she began setting the tea before Aemond, stiffening as she heard him speak behind her.
"What is this?" His eyes had fallen on her injured hand and he spoke tensly...dangerously. "Did someone hurt you?"
Y/N quickly moved to dispell this theory as she noted how his hand clenched and jaw tightened. "No, My Prince. It is only a small burn. I was not careful enough when handling the tea this afternoon in my haste to make sure it arrived still warm." At her answer a look of pain seemed to cross the Prince's face as he stood, gently taking her hand in his to assess her injury. She realised she did not like to see him so distressed over her. "It is only a little thing. It will heal."
Gazing down at her, his own good eye boring into her own, a penitent look fell over his features. "I do not much like tea. You do not need to bring it to me any longer. I would not have you hurt yourself again on my account."
Y/N was confused for a mere moment before anger took its place. She had thought it strange when he'd begun to ask for tea so regularly, having never expressed an inclination for it before. And here she'd been running about the Keep several times a day, trying and even burning herself in the attempt to fulfill his request when the kitchens were so far from his chambers on the upper levels of the Keep. Only to find he did not even enjoy the tea. Why would he do such a thing? She roughly ripped her hand from his hold, stepping back from him even as he began to follow her. "Were you laughing at me? Was it a mere jest to watch me run about the Keep all day for no reason?" She did not know where she'd found her courage, or perhaps the audacity to address the Prince in such a manner.
He looked positively alarmed now at the fierceness of her glare, having never inspired it before.
"No, of course not."
"Then why?"
"I only wished to spend more time with you"
The unexpectedness of his answer halted Y/N where she stood, allowing Aemond to close the distance between them until they stood nearly chest to chest.
"With me. But why?"
Aemond moved slowly as if she could bolt at any second, perhaps giving her the chance to pull away from him again if she wished. Recapturing her hand in his, he raised it to his lips and pressed a gentle kiss on the palm of her hand where the burn was. Pulling away, he held her hand against his heart and Y/N couldn't fail to take his meaning even though he didn't say the words directly. He must have an affection for her, perhaps not so strong as that which she held for him, but still there. In this knowledge, she supposed his actions though misguided could be considered sweet. She found herself at a loss for words, her mind swimming with the possibilities of what this could mean, and the inherent dangers of having feelings for a Prince of the Seven Kingdoms as a lowly servant girl.
In the moment she felt unable to decide whether she wanted Aemond to reciprocate her feelings or not, and whether she was comfortable with his advances. He'd seemed to sense her indecision as he gazed down at her face. Releasing her hand and lowering it back to her side, he stepped back from her until he was leaning against a side table. He was always so respectful of her, attentively watching for any signs of her discomfort and responding in kind. She was torn, wanting to reach for him again but knowing within her heart that nothing good could come of their feelings for one another. Better to repress them now rather than let them continue to grow and inevitably lead to dissapointment when he married a courtly Lady or Dornish Princess.
"Good night Y/N."
Y/N's eyes snapped up to meet Aemond's, expecting to find irritation or perhaps disspointment with her confused state. She was startled to find only steely determination in his eyes. "Good Night, My Prince." Willing herself not to turn around and look at him, in case she did something truly reckless, she headed straight for the servant's quarters.
Aemond felt more sure of himself than he ever had that he could win Y/N's love. He felt certain she already harboured an affection for him, she was only indecisive on whether to act on it, perhaps unsure of his intentions. This was understandable and he would seek to remedy it, for he had seen how her eyes had softened as he'd kissed her hand, how she had subconsciously curled her hand around his tunic once he'd placed it against his heart, as if to pull him closer to her. But watching her inner turmoil play out in her expressions and in her silence, he resolved to be patient, stepping back from her to allow her space to think. He loved her and was now convinced she at least held some feelings for him, in the end it did not matter how long it took to convince her of the fact.
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tanaor · 8 months ago
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Don't know how to create hooking character arcs?
(✨Dos and don'ts in character arc creation, part 1: don'ts✨)
Every writer knows that's a good character arc is something hard to achieve, and that there is usually a very fine line between making your characters evolve to the better and making them change completely... But don't worry! That's why today I wanted to share some of my tips to give your characters that something that will make their transformative journey unique, and also make your readers fall in love with them. So, let's get right to it!
DON'TS
1. Don't make your characters passive.
Your story needs someone strong to fight against whatever you are planning to put them trough! Making your characters strong doesn't necessary mean creating buff characters, but a good character will always have that *something* that can always push them to their try best. Could be a goal, a loved one, an ideology...
2. Don't give your characters some random disaster for no reason.
Of course, this things sometimes happen, but the best kind of disasters are the ones your character has put themselves into: they have no one else to blame (even if they tried). This are the disasters you should be pressuring for your characters, because they will teach your character something. Maybe your character was very egocentric during most of the story, and now they are alone. You can now either make them realize, or start a villain character arc were they believe the world has made them like that...
3. Don't make the decisions easy.
During the story, your character will have to take a lot of decisions, including many important ones, but here is the deal... Most of them shouldn't be easy. Make it hard for them to decide, make the decisions something that they feel guilty of, make them think that, maybe, "there really was a better alternative". Also remember that when taking hard decisions, characters usually decide what they think will make them suffer less: that's what we call pain vs pain.
4. Don't make everything terrible.
Remember: there's always calm before the storm. And, if you give your characters a false sense of victory, failure will always hurt more. (Even if you don't plan your characters to fail, it's a good technique to use before eventually everything comes down).
5. Don't be afraid of giving the character the ending they deserve.
When the story ends, you should be capable of naming at least three mayor changes in your character. But, of course, when the story ends you also want your readers to think "yes, that's what needed to happen". So, writers: don't be afraid. If the character deserves a bad ending, give it to them. If they deserve to succeed, let them win. Each story is different, but there will always be that ending that you feel is the right thing... Believe me, if a character deserves to fail, I'll want them to fail at the end, and there is not a feeling as good as someone getting what they deserve, what they have been earning since page one.
I wish this was helpful, and if you are interested keep tuned for the part 2: dos in writing character arcs. Happy writing everybody!!
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