thebenjiblackwoodexpress

[thebenjiblackwoodexpress]

Snow Drop Part 12:

Synopsis: Y/N presents Jacaerys with a token of her affection, and he, in turn, presents her with a gift. A dragon flight to a meadow of snowdrops leads to a potential acceptance of Jacaerys' proposal of marriage.

Writer's Note: Hi guys, long time no see. I popped on here a while back to update 'Delicate' but have had this in the drafts for a long time. Have been struggling with chronic illnesses that have been slowing me down, but I hope there are still readers interested in this story.

Dividers by #@zaldritzosrose

Warnings: female reader, some sexually suggestive content.

Y/N smiled slyly from her hiding place behind a stone pillar in the hallway that led to the main council room. She had concealed herself in readiness to catch Jacaerys unawares on his way to the Council Room that morning. Since she had revealed her fears around initiating physical contact with him and Jacerys had reassured her that he would always welcome it, Y/N had grown in confidence in seeking out his affection. Jacaerys was only too pleased with this new dynamic, his face lighting up with joy when they were alone and his love would run up to him in her happiness to see him. Opening his arms out to catch her as she lept into his embrace, he delighted to hear her laugh as he spun her around in his arms. Now that they both new the other's touch was only too welcome, the young couple had made a game of trying to steal kisses from each other in passing throughout the day. So far, Jacaerys was leading the contest, scarcely caring who observed them.

Only the evening before, Y/N had nearly cried out in alarm when, upon making her way back to the servants' hall from the council room, she felt an arm encircle her waist. She was spun into the chest of Jacaerys, who had concealed himself in an alcove. The sneak, Y/N, laughed as she placed both palms on his chest and met his smile with her own. Prodding him in the chest with her forefinger, she attempted to assume a stern tone, though this was made difficult by Jacaerys pulling her flush against him and stroking a finger teasingly up and down her waist.

"You scared me Jacaerys, you're getting far too sneaky for your own good." Jacaerys chuckled, "is that so, my love? Perhaps you would like to announce our engagement then, so I might not offend you so with what you call my 'sneakiness', though I resent that appelation." Rolling her eyes indulgently at him, she reached up to kiss his cheek, earning her one of his dazzling smiles. "Shouldn't you be planning a war effort, my Prince?" Jacaery's hold on her waist became firmer as he lowered his head to hers, mouth hovering over hers. "How can I plan a war when you were stood there looking like that?"

Jacaerys had seemed distracted in the Council Room, when Y/N had entered the room to clear some goblets and replace the wine, stopping in the middle of what he was saying before his shook his head and tried to regain his composure. It was hard to focus when his beautiful dove was only metres away from him. Y/N laughed at this. "Like what, my prince? I'm hardly a wonder to look at in my maid's garb." Jacaerys' eyebrows furrowed together in displeasure. He so disliked when she spoke badly of herself. Well, he would have to prove how hard it was for him to keep his mind or hands anywhere else when she was near. "You have no idea what affect your beauty has on me, whatever you are dressed in. It is you who distracts me so, not your gown." Y/N tried to rebuke him further, but soon lost her train of thought when he spun her around so that her back was pressed lightly against the wall, one arm encircled around her waist and the other placed beside her head to keep her within his arms.

Jacaerys smiled confidently at the pretty blush on Y/N's cheeks as her hands curled into the fabric of his tunic, pulling him closer towards her. He needed no further invitation as he captured her lips with his, kissing her with a fervour that attested to the intensity of his love for her.

After a few moments, Jacaerys pulled away to begin leaving a trail of lingering kisses across her jaw to allow her to catch her breath. Looking around frantically to check the hallway for any onlookers, Y/N attempted to rebuke Jacaerys. "Someone might see, Jacaerys! We shouldn't..." but she quickly trailed off as his grip on her waist tightened, pressing her more firmly against his torso, and he began pressing his lips down the length of her neck. "Jacaerys," she attempted to say in a stern tone, but it came out instead as more of a sigh, as she became more focused on the feeling of his hand sliding down her bodice to caress her thigh. Jacaerys smirked against her collar bone, hearing her gasp and feeling her hands grip the fabric on either side of his torso. "You were saying, my dove?" He teased, brushing his knuckle against her thigh and up to her waist. Sighing in mock frustration, Y/N entangled her hand in his ebony locks, "Oh, never mind. Stop teasing Jacaerys, and kiss me." Lifting his head up from her collar bone, he grazed his lips against her ear, whispering, "as my princess commands. " With that, he crashed his lips onto hers once again, both lovers heedless of anything else besides the other.

Y/N was determined to be the one to surprise Jacaerys this time, else his ego get any bigger, she laughed behind her hand, as she saw him striking down the hallway. When he was just before her hiding place, she reached out with both arms to pull him by his arm towards her, making him stumble. Swiftly righting himself, Jacaerys's shocked expression transformed into a radiant smile when he realised who his assailant was. Reaching up on tiptoes to his his jaw, Y/N giggled, "got you!" Jacaerys chucked her chin affectionately. "So you have, my dove. But I'm afraid to tell you that you missed?"

Y/N tilted her head in puzzlement, "missed? What do you..." her question was abruptly interrupted by Jacaerys taking hold of her waist and wrapping his other arm around her shoulders to sweep her into an embrace as he kissed her. Y/N was too startled to grab onto him immediately, though he held her securely in his arms, but wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him back with equal fervour when she came to her senses. She supposed she would have to concede this round to Jacaerys once again, though she found that she did not mind doing so.

Light from the torches cast shadows over the sequestered spot in the library Y/N had concealed herself in, a piece of smooth leather in her hands. Y/N smiled dreamily while she worked on some stitching she intended as a surprise for Jacaerys, reliving the memory of being in Jacaerys' arms the previous evening. She had never felt so comfortable, so entirely safe and loved as she had with Jacaerys, after so long believing love would never find her.

Over the course of the last week, Y/N had become more and more sure in herself that she no longer wanted to wait to dispense with the veil of secrecy around their relationship. She wanted to marry him, to never be parted from him. And yet, her previous experience with men had left her with a deep seated fear that the man she loved might suddenly change in his manner to her. That he might profess his love for her one day only to cast her aside for another on a whim. Her initial reticence to reveal any of her worries to Jacaerys on this point and to even avoid him if she were unwell or upset was, in part, an attempt to avoid what she believed to be inevitable. That through time or her own actions he might tire of her.

The opposite had proven to be the case. Not only had he taken seriously and tried to alleviate any worries she had brought to him, but he had made it his mission to address even those she tried to conceal from him. She laughed at the mental image of the Prince of the realm falling through a maid servant's chamber door out of worry for. His concern for her was so disproportionate to her actual illness, being only a cold, that she could not suppress a laugh, though his assidious care for her also filled her with warmth.

She had pondered over and over again what she could possibly offer a Prince to show her affection for him, bring only a servant. She knew Jacaerys had little care for the difference in status between them both, beyond his perennial frustration at her not allowing him to make her his princess and, in so doing, promptly shower her in riches. He didn't seem to fully understand that his love was the greatest treasure to her..though she would he lying to say that she didn't covet the diadems he had made for her. He had pointed this weakness of hers with no small degree of smugness, after catching her trying the diadem on, gazing in wonder at her reflection in the glass of the window. She could not fathom the discordance between the glittering jewels crowning her head and her maid's garb. Y/N had not realised Jacaerys was watching her from his reclined position, leaning against a pillar with his arms crossed over his chest and a self-satisfied smirk on his face.

"It looks well on you, princess. Perhaps you should like to wear it from now on as 'my' princess.' Jacaerys had crooned, placing emphasis on the word 'princess'. Y/N had blushed furiously and proceeded to mock hit him in the arm, only to be met with his laughter as he wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling her towards him and silencing her with a kiss. She couldn't offer Jacaerys a gift even half as lavish as those he had bestowed upon her, but an idea had struck her a few days past, after Jacaerys had praised her skill in stitching.

Sitting beside her in the library one evening, a lovestruck expression on his face, which he held in the palm of his hand, he watched as her needle went through the fabric she was embroidering for Queen Rhaenyra. "That's beautiful, how ever did you become so skilled? You're stitching rivals the most experienced seamstresses of the Red Keep."

Y/N blushed with pride. She had always been proud of her stitching, having learnt it from her mother. She felt it was like having a gift her mother had bestowed upon her. But she had never been complimented on her stitching by a Prince.

"My mother taught me, she was a very talented seamstress, though I'm sure you only exaggerate because you care for me." She smiled modestly at Jacaerys before returning to her work.

"Nonsense, your stitching is the finest I have seen and please don't say such a thing again."

Y/N looked up at Jacaerys once again, confusion on her face.

"Say what?"

Jacaerys sighed and leaned closer, taking her hand gently in his, pressing a referential kiss to her palm, before pressing it to his cheek. "That I only 'care for you'. Such cold words. As if I didn't love you more than my own life. More than anything."

Y/N's expression softened in understanding. "Alright, that you love me."

Jacaerys perked up at that, transforming at once from a dejected suitor, his smile dazzling Y/N as it always did. "Much better." He kissed her palm once again before Y/N retracted it abruptly, his own expression falling onto confusion.

"Enough of that Ser, I must continue my stitching, and I cannot do that with you holding my hand." Jacaerys looked sullen at that but seemed placated when she kissed his cheek before continuing her work, not glancing at him again, though she could feel his smug gaze upon her even without looking.

Jacaerys' reaction to her sewing sparked an idea in Y/N's mind of a token of affection she could give Jacaerys and she was now finishing the final touches on her gift: a smooth piece of black leather adorned with three small snowdrops, sewed into it. It was a simple token, but one she hoped Jacaerys would appreciate as an earnest symbol of her love for him. She thought it would look well stitched onto the saddle of Vermax. Holding the token up to the light of a nearby lantern, she admired her handiwork. It might not be anything as fine as Jacaerys was accustomed to, but she fancied that the love she bore for him was interwoven in every stitch. She hoped he would not think it silly, but she had always read of fine ladies gifting their knights with favours as tokens of their affection and had thought he might like it.

Nevertheless, she waited in nervous anticipation for Jacaerys to arrive for her to give it to him, holding the token on her lap under the table. She did not have to wait long for the very prince she had been thinking of peered around the pillar concealing her hiding place. Y/N didn't wonder that he had found her so quickly. He always did, no matter how far she ensconced herself in the expansive library, full of shadowy nooks and corners.

It had almost become a game of hide-and-seek between them to see how quickly he could find her. She thought he might have just grown accustomed to her elusive ways after she has evading him so many times when he first began courting her. Smiling radiantly at her as she rose to meet him, he immediately wrapped her in a warm, protective embrace. Pressing a kiss to her head, he mumbled into her hair "I missed you, my dove."

Y/N laughed at this. "Jacaerys, you saw me only a few hours ago."

This much was true, for they had met each other in passing down a hallway, where Jacaerys had made sure to brush his finger tips against hers as she went by. The rogue was heedless to the whispering tongues and watching eyes of the castle.

Jacaerys only held her tighter at her rebuke, kissing her cheek. "That is long enough for me."

Drawing back from him, she swatted his chest in jest. "Perhaps this will make amends for my absence. I have something for you."

Jacaerys eyes perked up with curiosity, his head tilting to the side.

"Hold out your hand"

Jacaerys held out his palm obediently as Y/N carefully dropped her token into his hand. She suddenly grew anxious to see his response, briefly worried that he would think her gift silly after all.

She averted her gaze to her hands, which she played with restlessly. "I don't have any riches to get you a proper gift, but i wanted to give you a token of mt affection. You have given me so many lovely things. I know it is not very fine and no doubt you are used to stitching far more elegant than mine, but I thought you might like for me to stich it onto Vermax's saddle..that it would remind you of me when I'm not with you." She blushed furiously at this, realising how silly she must sound. Jacaerys' silence rebounded painfully through the echoing library, only the flickering flames from the lamps acting as a background to her anxiety as she anticipated his response. Assuming that his silence must mean he did not care for the gift, she made to take it back from his hand, which was closed around it. "Never mind, it was a silly idea. You dont need to take it," she flushed in embarrassment.

What she had thought was indifference or even a silent rejection of her token was quite the opposite. Jacaerys' silence could be attributed only to his wonder and overwhelming gratitude as he gazed upon his lady's lovely handiwork. He lovingly traced his index finger over the snowdrops stitched into the material, thinking of the first time he had seen his dove look at a real snowdrop; the way she had looked at the flower, as if it were the greatest marvel of this world was exactly how he looked at her.

The real flower had no such beauty for him compared to the ones her lovely hands had stitched into this token for him. He had not realised how long he had been silenced until Y/N made to take the gift from his hand, and he had noted with anxiety the dejected tone of her words. Seven hells, he was a brute. Catching her hand with his other hand, he arrested it in place above the token, preventing her from taking it from him. "No, no, please don't misunderstand. I am only taken aback by your gift. Of course I want it, I will treasure it. It is beautiful, my little dove. Perfect. I could not have asked for a better gift or sign of your affection. Would you stitch it onto Vermax's saddle for me?"

Y/N's eyes lit up as they met his gaze.

"Of course!"

Jacaerys pecked her lips in gratitude, smiling lovingly down at her.

"Perhaps you would like to see the flowers you like so much, my love. Would you accompany me to see the meadow I have spoken of.....that is, if it would be agreeable to you. I know you have turned down my previous invitations."

It was Jacaerys' turn to anxiously anticipated her reaction now. He had asked her to allow him to show her the meadow of snowdrops he had discovered while searching for the flowers for her, and been refused on both occasions. But then had been when she had been under the mistaken assumption that he was not serious in his attentions towards her...he sincerely hoped he had done enough to convince her that nothing could be further than the truth.

To his surprise and delight, Y/N wrapped her arms around his neck, and he caught her as she leant up to embrace him.

"I would love to, Jacaerys" she laughed, kissing his cheek. "I would like to see Vermax again too."

Jacaerys smiled softly down at the girl he held in his arms, scarcely believing his luck in having won her heart. "Vermax will be only to pleased to see you again. He has been an unreasonable fellow since you would not return my love, so perhaps you can act as an envoy between us both."

Y/N laughed at that. "I shall plead your cause."

Jacaerys spun with her in his arms in a circle, her musical laughter washing over him.

Jacaerys had made sure to speak to the cook to secure Y/N soem time off the bext day, having quickly revealed their secret love to her after the third time she had caught him 'skulking around her kitchen', in his ill fated attempts to make Y/N a hot chocolate. Despite her harshness, the old woman had proven to me a useful ally and confidant for them both and he secretly believed she had a soft spot for him; she had almost smiled once when he had kissed her cheek in gratitude for her help in seeing Y/N when she was unwell.

Jacaerys now stood upon the same ramparts of the castle where he had first introduced Y/N to Vermax and taken her on dragon back. He had been surprised and impressed by her lack of fear of the Dragon and hoped to take her for many more Dragon flights now that she had seemed to take to Vermax so much. The disloyal beast had equally taken to her and really has been in a foul humour with Jacaerys when she had not reappeared after their first introduction, seeming to assume Jacaerys was to be blamed.

He turned when he heard her light tread up the winding stairs to the rampart. His face broke out into a smile when he saw her , nd he immediately reached for her hand to draw her over to Vermax. She needed no further invitation to start stroking the dragon's snout as the beast leaned into her touch. Jacaerys snorted. "Are you happy now, Vermax? Will you now consider obeying your rider." Vermax only gave him a stern glare before playfully nudging Y/Ns shoulder with his snout, making her fall back a step, though she continued to stroke the Dragon. Jacaerys pressed a hand to Vermax and assumed a commanding tone. "Easy Vermax, be careful with her. She is precious to me." As if his Dragon did not already know that.

"He's alright, Jacaerys. He's very sweet."

Jacaerys snorted again incredulously. "Sweet is not a word I would use to describe Vermax, but I am pleased you should find him so. Now, are you ready to see your flowers, my love?"

Y/N nodded enthusiastically but looked at the saddle in trepidation. Jacaerys smirked, finding her expression adorable, as she tried to work out how to mount the dragon. "Come here" he said softly, holding his arms out to her. She obliged, pausing in front of Jacaerys. "I think it is a little high for you to attempt whatever dangerous leap you were just plotting. Let me assist you, my princess." Jacaerys carefully lifted her by her waist onto Vermax, before stepping on to the stirrup and settling himself behind her. He wove his arms around her to take hold of the reins, smiling against her cheek, as he noticed her light blush. Dragon flight was a perfect opportunity for him to be as close as possible to her and hopefully impress her, as he had the first time.

"Soves, Vermax"

At his command, his dragon rose through the air, up through the cloud cover so that they were quickly flying through purple and pink stained clouds. Jacaerys soon discovered that Y/N enjoyed the swooping turns Vermax could perform, enjoying the sound of her excited laughter as he directed Vermax to perform a sweep through the swirling clouds, though he held onto her tightly the whole time. He would not chance anything more daring with her in his arms.

They touched down upon the outskirts of a forest beside a glittering stream. The water catching the morning light like glimmering jewels. A thin mist coated the blades of grass, giving it a bluish, lavender hue. Lifting Y/N from the saddle and setting her gently down on the ground, he smiled at her wonderous expression, anticipating the sights he still had yet to show her, if she was already impressed. "Come with me." Taking her hand, he led her gently through the forest until they made their way to an a clearing. Stepping through a copse of low hanging trees, they emerged into a meadow covered with snowdrops, bedecking the grass like crystals under the cool light of the winter morning sun. He heard Y/N audibly gasp at his side, and he watched in fascination as as marvelled at seeing so many of the flowers she had so coveted. "It's beautiful, Jacaerys, I can scarcely believe it." She gazed in awe at the natural wonder before her, but he gazed directly at her when he said, "Yes, beautiful."

Hours later, the couple lay side by side, hands intertwined, under a copse at the border of the meadow, spots of snow-white flowers dotting the grass around them. Bouquets of snowdrops were tied tigether with string Jacaerys had bought with him for the purposes of taking as many of the flowers back with her as is love wanted. He would fill whole fooms with them if it would please her. Turning to face him, she placed her palm on his cheek, which he quickly held in place with his own hand. "Are you happy, Jacaerys?" She asked tentatively. "Of course I am, darling. I am always happy when i am with you." He kissed her palm before leaning his cheek into it once agaib. Smiling playfully at Jacaerys, Y/N turned over and leant over him, her hands pressed to his chest. "And you love me?"

Jacaerys grinned up at her, wrapping an arm around her waist to pull her completely across him. Jacaerys' breath hitched as Y/N lowered herself over him so that she was pressed flush against him, straddling his waist. Instinctively gripping her hips to hold her in place against him, Jacaerys half sighed out "yes". A mischevious glint made Y/N's eyes sparkle, seeing the dreamy look on Jacaerys's face as he gazed up at her. Shuffling lower so that her face was hovering closer to his, feeling his grip on her hips tighten in response, she teasingly whispered against his jaw, "this much?"

"Yes," Jacaerys responded, raising himself slightly to meet her lips. He pouted when she leaned away from him, just out of reach. "You love me and only me?" She asked in a teasing tone. Jacaerys smiled devilishly up at her, "No."

Jacaerys was amused by his love's adorable pout at his unexpected response, but quickly pulled her against him once again when she made to pull away from him.

"I also love Vermax, but I assure you my dove, that you come first in my affections."

Y/N broke out into laughter at this, lightly slapping his shoulder in admonishment. Y/N's expression fell slightly, however and the tone of her next question had a tone of insecurity that bothered Jacaerys. "Are you happy...with me? You don't think you will regret your choice...."

Jacaerys frowned at her question, saddened to hear that she still had any doubts as to the strength of his feelings for her. Raising his hand to gently tuck a loose lock of hair behind her ear, Jacaerys held her gaze steadily. "You have made me the happiest of men. You are my happiness, my love. No one could ever compare to you. Please never doubt it again." He was pleased to see her grant him another of her sweet smiles and immediately wrapped his arms around her when she leant down to press the side of her face against his chest, running her index finger down the patterns of silver foiling embroidered on his tunic. Jacaerys closed his eyes in contentment, stroking her hair affectionately. "Jacaerys?"

"Yes, my love," Jacaerys murmured, his eyes still closed.

"I want to marry you."

Jacaerys' eyes flew open at that, but he couldn't be sure he hadn't just imagined the words, having done so so many times before, since his love had spoken them so quietly against his tunic.

Jacaerys raised himself up, pulling Y/N up with him so that she was in his lap, his arms wrapped around her waist.

"What did you say, my love?"

Y/N wrapped her arms around his shoulders and leant her head towards his so that their lips were nearly touching. "I said that I want to marry you, you fool"

Jacaerys pulled her closer to him, as if afraid she would run away the next minute. "Do you really mean it, my love?"

Y/N giggled, rubbing her nose affectionately against his.

"Yes, Jacaerys. I really mean it"

Jacaerys heart soared, his face alight with a contented smile at hearing the words he had longed to hear and dreamt of for so long. Pressing his hand to her face, he tilted it up towards his to press a gentle kiss to her lips. He cupped her face, pressing his forehead against hers as he sighed out, "Thank the gods."

Gif source https://pin.it/6vwMWl0Qv

Gif by @lady-arryn on Pinterest

[thebenjiblackwoodexpress]

Thank you so much for the mention lovely! @cloud-sitting

House of the Dragon Fic Recs

Aemond Targaryen

Oneshots

Love in Duty by @oldtowrs

3.6k - fluff Aemond had always understood what it meant to be a prince and the duties that came with it. Duty became such a big part of his life that he had come to terms with it, and even began to look forward to some parts of it. But then when his eye is taken from him, all of Aemond's musings are for naught and all his dreams are taken away–including his hope of being loved by his future wife, and loving her in return. Or, at least that's true, until you come into his life.

Series

Devil’s Snare Series - part 1 / of many by @thebenjiblackwoodexpress

multiple works - fluff - Handmaiden!reader You are apprehensive when assigned the post of Aemond Targaryen's handmaiden. You expect him to be cold and cruel, and are surprised when he actually shows you kindness and gentleness. All the while Aemond finds himself falling for his shy and skittish handmaiden.

[thebenjiblackwoodexpress]

how are you? We haven't heard from you in a while, so is all good?? Hope everything is okay and life is treating you well!!

Hi lovely,

Thank you for your kidn message. Apologies for the unexpected hiatus on this blog. We've had a tricky start to the year with a lot of changes and illness but really want to get back into the swing of things. I love writing Devil's Snare and it's so close to being complete, so I need to just really kick myself into gear and get it done for you guys who've been so supportive the whole time.

Elizabeth is cracking one with Snowdrop and Delicate, so we promise we haven't abandoned this blog!

Xxx

[thebenjiblackwoodexpress]

omg LOVED the new chapter of Delicate!! I loved the first 6 chapters and wow what a delightful surprise to see the 7th pop up on my timeline i went :O!!! It made me so anxy (in the best way), like eeeek I just want gwayne to steal alicent and the reader away and go back to oldtown!

Thank you so much for taking the time to say that. It means the world! I've been really unwell for the last year and was only able to write this in stages, but I'm trying to get back into writing regularly now, and Part 8 will follow soon. Whilst the story might take a sadder note for now, I can give you a sneaky hint that a happy ending is in sight. It will be a long series, though. The trio will find a way to be together.

[thebenjiblackwoodexpress]

Delicate: Part 7

Gwayne Hightower x Reader

Description: After Gwayne intervened to defend her against the unwanted attentions of Ser Tyland, Y/N comes to realise just how much he means to her. At the same time, Gwayne struggle to propose to the lady he loves, fearful of rejection. Otto Hightower's plotting threatens to divide Gwayne from both his sister and his lady love.

Writer's Note: Hello readers. I'm not sure if anyone is still interested in this story after such a long hiatus, but here is the next part of the story. I'm so sorry for the delay, I've been suffering from chronic illness, and it's really slowed down my ability to write. I have written most of the next part, so there won't be as long a wait. I'm also close to posting the next part of Snow Drop for those still interested. As always, thank you to everyone who continues to read, enjoy, and comment on my stories. It means a lot.

Warnings: Female reader, misogny, suggestions of familial abuse.

Dividers by @zaldritzosrose

An eery silence fell over King's Landing, as if the very bricks and mortar of the structure held silent vigil over the bodies of the late queen and her son. Not even a breath of wind moved through the trees of the Godswood, the whole of the Red Keep seemingly holding its breath in anticipation of the calamity that was soon to reverberate throughout its walls.

As the candles burnt low in the sconces on the walls, Gwayne could be found sitting sentry in the corridor outside his sister's bedchamber, guarding both Alicent and his lady. He knew that both ladies would feel safer knowing that he was nearby, and he had quickly given up on the possibility of sleep when he was so angered by the events at the banquet. His thoughts were frantic as he fought to find a way of removing Alicent and his lady from the insidious enclosure of the Red Keep and the cruelty of their own fathers.

Gwayne had petitioned his father over and over to allow him to take Alicent back to Old Town with him, knowing how she despised King's Landing and wished only for them not to be separated, but to no avail. If he could only find a way to convince his father that it would be for the benefit of the family or, rather, his benefit... that was the only consideration he ever truly took into account. Y/N was an even more difficult consideration in his plans.

There was nothing for it. He would have to risk rejection as a lover and potentially even as a friend by proposing to his lady. He could think of no other way of removing her from her father's clutches and offering her the protection he so wished to give her and yet...he would wish for more time to further endear himself to her heart.

He did not wish for Y/N to misconstrue his earnest proposal of love and marriage as yet another attempt by a man in her life to control her. He already knew that she had long considered marriage to be just another prison, an exchange of her father's control for her husband's. He could only hope to convince her that he would never seek to control her and that their marriage would be one between equals, founded upon love and respect. He knew, also, that he would have to make clear that he had no expectations that their marriage would have to have a physical element beyond what she was comfortable with.

In truth, he would fall from the graces of the Seven just to touch her face or her hand. He hoped that she knew that, but if she was still unclear on that point, he would reassure her.

His thoughts were abruptly interrupted by the sound of heavy footsteps making their way down the corridor. Looking up quickly, Gwayne's heart plummeted as he saw his father approaching him, his face contorted in rage. Gwayne steeled himself for another tense exchange with his father. Sighing as he rose to meet his father, he positioned himself in front of Alicent's door. He could only hope that his father would not wake either his sister or his lady. Believing that his father's ire was meant for him, Gwayne was alarmed when his father attempted to manoeuvre around him to open Alicent's door. Angered by his father's rude attempt to enter his sister's apartments without her permission and wake her at such a late hour, he had no hesitation in pushing his father back a pace. Taking advantage of Otto Hightower's brief look of surprise at being challenged by his usually pliable son, Gwayne positioned himself more fully in front of the door.

"Insolent pup, what do you mean by challenging your father. Move aside."

Gwayne pushed his father again when he tried to forcefully move Gwayne aside, though his hand shook as he prepared to challenge his father.

"I will not move aside if you mean to wake my sister. There is nothing you can have to say to her that cannot wait until morning."

Otto Hightower's eyes narrowed menacingly at his son, his voice assuming a steely coldness.

"Do you not know what has happened? The Queen is dead. Soon, the whole castle will know of it."

Gwayne's brow furrowed in confusion. Whilst he was sorry to hear of the Queen's passing, having believed her to be a gentle and kind ruler, he could not understand how this could possible provide justification for his father waking his sister at such an hour. He grew suspicious of his father's intentions, fearing that he was planning on involving his sweet sister in one of his sinister schemes in his bid for power.

"And how does this news concern Alicent? What purpose do you have waking her at such an hour to deliver it? I will not allow you to bring her into any of your scheming."

The bitterness in Gwayne's tone surprised even him, but his protectiveness towards his sister won out over his fear of crossing his father.

"Never you mind. I have questions of my own for you, boy. Why are you standing guard like a dog outside Alicent's chambers?"

"It is a good thing I was, or else you may have rudely woken her and entrapped her in some dark scheme I cannot fathom."

Taking a step closer towards Otto so that they were chest to chest, Gwayne spoke in a low, dangerous voice.

"I will repeat myself once more, Ser. I will not allow you to enter Alicent's chambers at such an hour, nor will I watch idly whilst you draw Alicent into your webs of deceit in your relentless pursuit of power. You may not care about her, but Alicent is my sister, and I will defend her with my last breath, even from her own father, who should protect her."

Gwayne was out of breath when he had finished his tirade, his heart pounding. He had never before taken a stand against his father, but his father's strange behaviour had sparked his fierce protectiveness towards his sister. He could not shake the feeling that Otto had some ill intentioned scheme he sought to ensnared Alicent. He would not allow it.

If he had to steal Alicent away with him in the night back to Oldtown or some far away place outside of Westeros to protect her, then that is what he would have to do. He could only hope that Lady Y/N would consent to accompany them. Perhaps then he could protect them both. If his love would not consent to be his wife, then he could present her as a relative. If he could never have her love, he could at least have her friendship and the honour of protecting her and his sister, far from the vipers nest of King's Landing. He was glad Otto was not aware of his lady being in his sister's apartments, fearing that Otto's ire may also extend to her.

Otto stood dumbstruck by his son's rebellion, never having expected his quiet, pliant son to stand up to him. He had not accounted for him in his scheme to endear Alicent to the grieving king. He resolved that he would have to remove Gwayne from the board if he was to win this game. He would have to send him back to Oldtown if he was to make a success of it. For now, he would let the insolent pup think he had won this round. It would give him a false sense of security, which would make it all the easier to send him away later. Placing a hand on his son's shoulder, who flinched at his touch, he sighed.

"Very well, it can wait until the morning. Get some sleep, son."

Gwayne's shock at his father's almost affectionate gesture and use of the term 'son', when he had never called him so before allowed Otto to retreat to his own chambers before Gwayne could question him any further about what he had intended to say to Alicent. Nevertheless, Gwayne was not so easily fooled as Otto imagined him to be, and so remained outside his sister's chamber doors until she emerged to break her fast, fearing that Otto would seek her out again if he sought sleep himself.

Y/N had had but a restless sleep, turning over in her mind the events of the previous evening. Whilst she was shaken by her father and Ser Tyland's behaviour towards her, lying next to Alicent, aware that Gwayne was just outside their door, she had never felt safer. Following his passionate defence of her against even her father, Y/N could be in no doubt that she could rely on his protection.

Besides Alicent, Y/N had never sought the embrace of another person, withdrawing into herself when upset. In her distress the previous evening, she surprised even herself by how natural it felt to seek the comfort and safety of Gwayne's arms. His touch was gentle and tentative, as if afraid to distress her further by touching her. Unlike the other men at Court, Gwayne had always been so understanding about her aversion to touch; but this no longer extended to him... not now that she knew she loved him.

Feeling his arms hover around her tentatively, she had only tightened her hold on him, willing him to return her embrace. When he had finally enclosed her in his arms, it had felt to Y/N like coming home. She felt that there was nowhere she would rather be than within the safety of his arms.

She gazed lovingly at Alicent, who slept facing her, softly breathing in and out. Y/N reached out her hand, lightly stroking her friend's cheek with a feather light touch. She felt she could be truly happy if she and her two best friends could exist in a world entirely their own. Alicent blinked slowly awake, immediately smiling at Y/N. "Did you sleep well, my love? Are you feeling better?"

Alicent's motherly tone had Y/N's eyes brimming with tears, knowing that she would soon have to leave the safety of Alicent's chambers to return to her own chambers and the prison of her father's jurisdiction.

"Oh my sweet, don't cry, all is well." Alicent reached out and gently brought Y/N's head to rest against her chest, rubbing small circles against her back. "I do not wish to leave you," Y/N sniffled against Alicent's neck. Alicent tutted affectionately, stroking Y/N's hair. "Gwayne shall be very put out if he finds you so distressed. Let us try to be cheerful for him. You dont have to leave just yet and we can spend the whole day together, just like we always do."

As Y/N curled her fingers around Alicent's nightgown like a lifeline, Alicent whispered in a comforting tone, "Gwayne and I will not let anyone harm you and....perhaps there will soon come a time when you can leave this place and we shall all never be parted. Would you want that?" Y/N looked up at Alicent's face with a wonderous expression, as if she were one of the Seven come down to gift her a prophecy of future happiness. "More than anything," she responded earnestly, causing Alicent to break into a sly smile. "I am sure that Gwayne feels much the same as both you and I about the matter. Have no fear, my pet, Gwayne will resolve all. He shall care for us both."

Y/N raised her head slightly from Alicent's chest to gaze credulously up at her. She scarcely dared to hope that Alicent's words promised a future she had only dreamed of could be possible. Could she really mean that she such a dream had a possibility of becoming a reality; that she could hope to live with Alicent and Gwayne in Old Town; that Gwayne may even wish her to be his wife? A gentle knock at the door startled them both, followed by the soft cadence of Gwayne's voice on the other side of it. "Sister, Y/N, it is time to wake. The breakfast is prepared in the morning room."

Alicent broke into a smile, "speak if the rascal." Jumping up from the bed, she tripped lightly over to her dressing screen, grabbing her robe and pulling it in before going to the door. When she opened the door, Y/N instinctively pulled the covers up higher, surprised by Alicent's sudden movements. She needn't have worried for Gwayne, perfect gentleman that he was, was stood on the threshold of the doorway with his back towards the door. She smiled at his chivalrous nature, clearly having anticipated that Alicent might open the door without first having warned her friend.

Still with his back turned, though Y/N could see the curve of his smile from his side profile, Gwayne chuckled. "Indeed, sister, I do not think Lady Y/N wants me storming in when she has just awoken. Not all ladies are heathens," he teased.

Y/N laughed when she saw Alicent pout and her cheeks warm. So comfortable were the two siblings with each other she clearly hadn't considered that.

"Oh very well, Gwayne, you are an imp. Wait outside then, and we will be with you on a moment."

Gwayne's smile deepened so that Y/N could see his cheek dimple, and his voice had a satirical lilt as he spoke his next words. "I shall be awaiting your fair presence, my ladies, with bated breath. Do not take too long, or I may run out of it."

Alicent playfully swatted Gwayne's back and pushed him lightly out the door, only eliciting a hearty laugh from him.

Y/N laughed delightedly at the domestic scene. All mornings should begin like this, with the mellow light of the sun streaming through the window and the sound of laughter. Eager to see Gwayne and speak with him, she dressed hurriedly in one of Alicent's dresses. Another green number was more precious because it was Alicent's she considered, as she brushed the velvet fabric.

Stepping out before Alicent, who required more time to brush her elegant curls into place, Y/N found herself almost nervous to be alone with Gwayne after how emotional she had been before him the night previously. Whilst she knew Gwayne would never judge for being so, she still found herself emerging from Alicent's room, feeling not a little bashful.

"Good morning, Gwayne," she spoke quietly, but Gwayne was already turning to face her, having heard the soft tread of her slipper.

Gwayne's expression lit up at the sight of her, as he quickly stepped forward and took her hand in his, interlacing their fingers. Y/N looked down at their joined hands in surprise. He had never done that before. Seeing that she continued to stare at their hands, Gwayne grew concerned that he had overstepped and began to reluctantly withdraw his hand from her dantier one when she suddenly gripped onto it, preventing him from doing so. It was now his turn to meet her eyes with a look of surprise. She wanted to hold his hand....could that mean? But no, he wouldn't allow himself to be carried away with such a delightful thought too soon. She could not possibly love him as he loved her, but he would content himself if she would only consider him as a suitor.

So stunned by her sweet gesture, Gwayne forgot what he was about to say and only continued to stare in wonder, making Y/N laugh in the musical way that only she did.

"Is there something on my face, Ser, that you should stare so?"

Recollecting himself, Gwayne smiled at her, responding softly, "Only the most beautiful features the sun ever did grace with its light."

This stunned her, though it pleased him to see a slight pink hue on her cheeks. Nevertheless, he didn't flatter himself that it was due to any charm he might hold for her; she was probably just flustered by such a comment. Why couldn't he just keep his mouth shut. Just as he opened his mouth to apologise for his forward comment, if it caused her discomfort, she surprised him further by raising her hand towards his face and lightly grazing her fingertips across his cheekbone. Barely the ghost of a touch, and yet he continued to feel it in his soul for hours afterwards.

She met his gaze seriously whilst he was still trying to recollect himself. "I wanted to thank you for defending me last night and looking after me, Gwayne. I cannot tell you how much it means to me...how much you mean to me."

Gwayne's heart stuttered at her admission. Could she mean? Could his dream of her accepting his love and his hand in marriage not be such a distant fantasy after all?

As he continued to stare at her open-mouthed, she blushed further and stuttered out, "How much both you and Alicent mean to me. Where is Alicent anyway. She's taking a mong time." She looked around anxiously. It was now for Gwayne to reassure his lady that there was no need for her to be embarrassed. Taking her hand once again, and recalling her attention back to him, he reverently raised it to his lips and kissed her palm, casting an adoring look at her before he placed her hand over the crook of his arm. "No one means more to me than you and Alicent, Y/N." A look of understanding past between each other, as of their hearts were communicating the love they both harboured for the other.

Just as they were both opening their mouths to give speech to this love, the door of Alicent's chambers clicked open and she emerged, smiling at them both. "I am ready now, Gwayne. You cannot fault me for tardiness today, I don't believe I ever got ready so quickly." Smiling softly at Y/N, trying to communicate to her with his eyes what he could not say just yet, he squeezed her hand affectionately and turned to his sister with a wry curve to his lips. "Dear sister, I salute you on your readiness. You are merciful for not making your poor brother wait for the usual two hours whilst you ready yourself for a day of teasing him."

Alicent laughed and playfully swatted his shoulder before taking his other arm, as was their custom. "You are bad, Gwayne."

Gwayne laughed musically, "You would not have it any other way."

"Oh, do show me, Y/N. I promise I'll behave."

The trio were seated underneath the Weirwood tree, the golden pink hues of the sun dipping behind the horizon casting a glow over them. Gwayne was leaning, arm outstretched in an attempt to pull Y/N's sketchbook towards him as she smiled playfully at him and swatted his hands away. "No Gwayne, they aren't any good."

"I highly doubt that, my Lady. I do so want to see the handiwork of your beautiful hands."

Alicent rolled her eyes at Gwayne's ill concealed lover for her friend. She wished the two would just get to the point so that they could all be happy together in Oldtown.

"It does not matter what you say Gwayne, I shan't give in."

Gwayne pouted as she stood and brushed her skirts down.

Kneeling down dramatically before her, he took hold of both of her hands and spoke in a placating tone. "What if I beg?"

Once again Alicent rolled her eyes at her friend's flustered expression. They were such fools in love and yet, to any observers perspective, they appeared exactly as they were: two lovers, completely enraptured by one another, the Knight kneeling before his lady in adoring supplication.

Y/N's mouth curves into a smile at Gwayne's antics, holding back a smile. "Oh you menace, you cannot be refused."

Gwayne smiled, squeezing her hands before leaping back onto the heels of his boots. "So you will show me?"

Sighing in playful exasperation, Y/N lightly pushed her sketchbook into Gwayne's chest, "if it pleases you."

Gwayne took the sketchbook with alacrity. "Nothing pleases me more."

Gwayne was soon absorbed in turning the leaves of his lady's sketchbook, whilst her and his sister's musical laughs formed the perfect background to his perusal. He delighted in seeing the evidence of her skill in her drawings and in the sights, which seemed to inspire her. She most commonly rendered his sister, Alicent, but she had also perfectly delineated the lines of the Weireood tree they now convened under and the severe structure of the Red Keep. Gwayne's forefinger got stuck on two pieces of parchment, which appeared to have been folded in such a way to conceal the drawing beneath. Curious, Gwayne carefully unsealed the pages, and his eyes widened at what he saw on the page.

It was him. Y/N had drawn him sitting under their tree, as he now was, smiling softly as he spoke to his sister. His heart warmed to think that she had thought him a worthy subject for her skill. He dared to hope that her hiding the drawing might mean it was special to her. Perhaps even that it spoke to feelings she might harbour for him. Looking over the sketchbook, he could see that she was still completely engrossed in conversing with his sister, so he carefully curved the pages over one another, careful to make sure they appeared as before. He did not want to embarrass her by revealing he had seen the drawing if she did not want him to see it. Instead, he rose from his seat and held the sketchbook out to Y/N. "You are most skilled, my Lady." Gwayne's hand lingered on her own, brushing her fingers affectionately as she took the sketchbook from him. Gwayne resolved that he would find the courage in himself to speak to her of the feelings he had so long held within his heart for her like a secret. If there was any chance that she would accept him as her husband, he would take it.

Gwayne sighed in frustration, running his hand across his face before turning sharply to face his father. "I do not see the urgency for me to depart for Oldtown. Cannot Ormond send you the papers you wish to see? I am sure he has all in hand."

"Do not equivocate with me, boy!" Otto Hightower snapped. "Your father commands you to return to Oldtown and attend to urgent matters on his behalf. This is not a request."

Gwayne's brows furrowed in consternation.

Before he could respond to his father with an angry word, Otto Hightower silenced him with his usual threat. Otto sneered. "The King has grown interested in Alicent's company of late, I wager he favours her. Do not you think." Gwayne's eyes widened in alarm, his heart plummeting. He felt unwell hearing his father's words. He had often used his beloved sister as a bargaining chip to force his sob to obey his whims, but something about the manner in which he spoke made him fear that this was no empty threat.

"Do not threaten me, father. I will do as you ask, but only on the understanding that you do not force Alicent into an arrangement with a man more than twice her age. You promised me you would not do so." His face fell, a look of desperation alighting on it. "I beg you to hold to your promise. Leave Alicent be or let her return to Oldtown with me, and I will do as you ask."

Otto grabbed the lapel of Gwayne's tunic and spoke in a dangerous tone. "You would do well to do as I say and return to Oldtown.'

Closing his eyes and dropping his head, gwayne nodded dejectedly. Of course he would do what his father willed. He always did. He would do anything to protect his sister from him and from any other man.

"Understood, Ser. I will depart forthwith."

Grabbing his son's shoulder in a manner that might appear affectionate to an observer, he dug his nails painfully into it. "That is what I thought."

"I don't understand why you have to go, Gwayne! You cannot abandon me now." Alicent held gripped onto Gwayne's tunic, her knuckles turning white and tears trickling down her cheeks. Gwayne swallowed thickly, holding back his own emotions at parting his his sister. He hated to see her so distressed, but he reminded himself that he was leaving for her.

His departure would prevent his father from embroiling her in any of his machinations for power, he assured himself. It pained him, nonetheless, to know that his actions hurt his sister and that she felt he was abandoning her to the cold court of Kings Landing. He gently took hold of her hands, concerned to see that she had taken to biting the skin around her nails again, a nervous habit she had developed as a young girl. He recalled taking hold of her hand when they were both children when he would see her doing it.

In later years, when she was forced to join their father in Kings Landing and he was left in Oldtown, he had gifted her a silk handkerchief, embroidered with the Hightower sigil, so that she could wring it in her hands when she felt such distress and prevent her from hurting herself. It didn't seem to be working now. His brows furrowed in concern as he raised his sister's hands to kiss her knuckles. "Please don't be distressed, sister. I cannot disobey a direct order from our father, and he tells me that I must go. I will return as soon as I can, I can promise you that."

Alicent only seemed to grow more panicked, a look of desperation on her face that left Gwayne with an ill, foreboding feeling.

"But I need you now, Gwayne. Y/N and I both do."

Cupping her cheeks in his hands, Gwayne searched her eyes.

"What are you hiding, Alicent. I can't help you if I do not know what fears you are harbouring."

A look of dejection passed over Alicent's face which was more disturbing to him than even her panic, suggestive as it was of resignation to something he could not understand.

Retracting her hands listlessly from Gwayne's tunic, she quickly turned from him and made to leave the room. Pausing with her back to him, she murmured quietly,

"You cannot help me, Gwayne...Go if you must, but return quickly. Y/N will be devastated to see you go so suddenly."

Gwayne felt a sense of desperation threatening to overwhelm him as his sister spoke. There was something foreboding in her words, the source of which he could not ascertain. He felt as if a chasm were opening up between them, over which he could not reach her and he step forward as if to stop her from leaving the room.

"Alicent wait, come back."

But Alicent hurried from the room without glancing back in his direction, the lock clicking into place as she closed the door. Gwayne felt an uneasiness he could not place as he replayed his sister's words in his mind. What was she so afraid of that she could not tell him? What was she hiding? He could only hope that his absence would prevent his scheming father from disturbing his sweet sister's peace by involving her in his struggles for power.

His thoughts turned to Y/N, who he was just as loathe to leave as his sister, anxious to protect them both from the vipers at Court. Just when he was building up the courage to propose to the lady he loved, he was being forcefully torn away from her. Would she really care if he left? His heart answered that she would, but as a friend or a lover? Either way, he would have to tell her. With a dejected sigh, he collapsed in a nearby chair, resting his head in his hands on the desk. He would have to be strong if he was to protect his sister. No matter how much it hurt him to part from her and his love, he would do anything his father asked of him if he could protect Alicent; even if it meant leaving them both.

@liafiction @madamewhitesnake @rebeccawinters @ateliefloresdaprimavera @beebeechaos @darknessinside11 @read-just-cant @ganymede-princess @a-dorkier-book-keeper @leptitlu @ambrosia-v-black @labellapeaky @deltamoon666 @just-some-random-blogger

#Gwayne Hightower #hotd #hotd imagine #Gwayne Hightower x reader #house of the dragon #house of the dragon imagine #house of the dragon x reader #ser gwayne #hightower #alicent hightower

[thebenjiblackwoodexpress]

Utterly take your time with any writing!! Always gotta put yourself first, and I hope that things get smoother for you! 💚

You're so kind! Thank you lovely. I really appreciate it. 🙏 💚

[thebenjiblackwoodexpress]

This sounds a lot like my Jacaerys Velaryon X Handmaiden reader fiction called Snowdrop. Apologies if I'm mistaken. The storyline is exactly the same but it's Lord Broome instead of Ulf who shouts at her.

help me please find a fiction about Jacaerys valeryon x reader please please 😭🙈. It was fiction where I think that reader was a handmaid and one day they all were ať dragonstone disscussing about strategies And reader was serving them and she accidentally droped a tray with food or something And Ulf the White shouted at her and jacaerys Stod up for her And helped her and said that the tray was heavy and it is no wonder that she dropped it and rest i can't remember please help me. If you know the name or writter of the fiction or you can just tag it or or whatewer I will be sooooo happy 🙈 thank you! 🥰

[thebenjiblackwoodexpress]

Hiiiiii

Probably not the update you were expecting. So so sorry Devil's Snare is delayed again. Have been in the trenches with my personal life and just haven't had the mental capacity to finish it yet. The final part is getting there and hopefully I can get it up soon, but huge apologies for the delay. Elizabeth has an update to Delicate almost ready to go and she's writing a new part for Snowdrop that's going be up soon.

Thanks for your patience lovelies xx

[thebenjiblackwoodexpress]

is Devils Snare nearly over or actually over now? I swear I saw that you had like, 1 more part, but I also couldn't remember if that was wishful thinking on my part because it's so amazing!!

#devilsnarestanclub I'm very much part of this lol

Thank you so much for your question. I'm so glad you enjoyed Devil's Snare lovely! I have still got one more part in the works. It's just super long and has taken me ages, but I'll deffo try to get it up next week.

Haha I love the #devilssnarestanclub. You guys are the best xx

[thebenjiblackwoodexpress]

AAAAAAAHHHHH (me internally when i saw there was a new Devil’s Snare chapter). Ugh, per usual I loved it and I love their love 😭😭 Can’t wait to see the baby be born and to see how utterly obsessed with their baby Aemond will be!! Sad it’s only one more chapter but wow what an amazing series 😭🥰🥰 #DevilsSnareStanClub

Eeeeeee I'm thrilled it lived up to expectations especially with the gap between parts. Thank you so much lovely! Aemond is deffo going to be a doting father. I have plans 😉

#DevilsSnareStanClub I love you guys so much 😭

[thebenjiblackwoodexpress]

Devil's Snare Part. 12

Description: Aemond and his wife revel in their newfound joy at her pregnancy. But a decisive Battle at Rook's Rest looms over the Red Keep and their happiness.

Previous part

Dividers by @zaldritzosrose

Writer's note: Finally got my shit together and wrote something. I'm not even going to lie this is 90% just Aemond being obsessed with his pregnant wife and very little plot. The next part will also deffo be the final part so thank you to everyone who has kept this story alive with all your support depsite the most erratic updates ever. I love you all!

Warnings: mostly fluff with a little angst (fears of miscarriage and childbirth), sexual content but not explicitly smut (speaking my truth that Aemond might have a kink about seeing his wife pregnant).

The relief Y/N felt in finally telling Aemond she was with child, and in his joy at the fact was tempered slightly by the hen pecking she subsequently had to withstand. If Aemond had been overprotective before, he was completely overbearing now, constantly hovering to ensure she didn't fall and constantly harassing the maesters about her health. He would not even allow her to walk down the stairs of the keep if she was not holding onto his arm or the dowager queen's when he was not with her in case she should fall. Though she could admit that the tonics the maesters brought her daily had done wonders for her morning sickness, which had thankfully diminished and it was sweet that Aemond was so concerned for her health and that of their unborn child.

Y/N was also grateful that her pregnancy had brought her and he husband seven closer together. Aemond spent as much time as possible by her side during the day and by night she would always sleep with her back pressed against his chest, his arms wrapped securely around her abdomen as if to keep both her and their unborn child safe. As weeks passed and she finally began to show, Y/N found herself growing more lethargic and spending most of her time in their shared chambers or with Helaena and Queen Alicent, who had been most gracious to her in the knowledge she carried her grandchild. Thus it was that Aemond would come to her at regular intervals throughout the day, very clearly sneaking away from some council meeting or another, often presenting her with yet another gift or bouquet of her favourite flowers.

Despite the happiness Y/N felt, she also felt a little guilty, knowing Aemond must be shirking his duties in some way to be with her. She wished for nothing more than an end to this senseless war between kin, so she could simply enjoy this newfound joy between her and Aemond without a shadow hanging over them constantly. Due to his silent, almost cat-like tread, Y/N did not always notice his presence until she felt his hands gently caressing her growing bump. It was on one such occasion that the baby had kicked for the first time, and she'd winced slightly at the jarring sensation, sending Aemond into a panic as he immediately removed his hands from her person.

"Did I hurt you, my love?" Y/n didn't respond for a few moments in her surprise at the new sensation. But it filled her heart with a warm and pleasant feeling as she smiled at the sure sign of life. Looking up to see Aemond in a state of anguish, she quickly relented, reaching for his hands to place them back on her stomach so he could feel the tiny kicks of their little one.

"No, no. I'm fine. I felt the baby kick for the first time and was surprised. Here, can you feel it?"

Aemond looked down at her protruding stomach in awe as Y/N felt another tiny kick. Aemond surely felt it too, as he smiled softly.

"My little dragon. I hope you will not give your mother too much trouble with your kicking."

Looking back up at her with a tender smile, full of love for both her and their child, Y/N knew, Aemond had leant down to kiss her and Y/N could feel the gratitude he felt towards her in that moment for such a gift. After that, nothing seemed to bring the prince more joy than pressing his hand to Y/N's bump and asking after their little dragon as he had taken to calling their child. He seemed pleased the child was so lively, a sign that the little Prince or princess would be healthy and strong, the maesters said. Though, Aemond remained a caring and loving husband and was ever sympathetic to any pains caused by the child's restlessness.

"I hope my child isn't giving you too much trouble, my love." He tutted softly at her bump as he grazed a hand up and down her spine soothingly. Y/N could only imagine how he'd managed to find his way back to her in the middle of the day when she knew very well his duties lay elsewhere. Y/N huffed, shifting as she felt another kick in her ribs, as if the baby could hear her father's voice.

"Your child barely gives me a moment's rest. Certainly they are the blood of the dragon."

Aemond stroked her hips, his fingers creating small circles as he looked at her with the utmost sympathy.

"Is it terribly painful, my darling?"

Y/N sighed, circling her arms around Aemond's neck and leaning her body against his.

"It's not so bad, I'm glad our child is strong and it's comforting in a way. Don't look so anguished Aemond, I was only jesting before."

Aemond pressed his lips to her temple.

"Is there anything I can do to ease your suffering?'

Y/N smiled at Aemond's affectionate gesture, toying with his brocade a little bashfully.

"You can distract me..if you like." She added as an afterthought.

Aemond was glad he'd paid attention to the trinkets Helaena liked when they were growing up. It made it much easier for him to know what gifts women liked. He had little experience with women before Y/N, and no part of him had ever considered himself a suitable romantic partner before her due to his disfigurement. Yet fortune had bestowed upon him the love of a sweet and gentle lady, who had given him what he'd always yearned for, a family. Past experience had taught him Y/N would only begrudgingly accept jewels or ornaments but that she was partial to fine fabrics, having a particular acuity for sewing and embroidery And of course there was her favoured bluebells he was only too happy to gather for her. He wanted to show her Y/N every day how grateful he was to her for the great gift of the child she nurtured within her womb.

He felt himself smile subconsciously at the thought of the baby his wife carried in spite of himself as he sifted through piles of fine silks, trying to determine which Y/N might like best. He was sure he saw the merchant shiver minutely out of the corner of his good eye. Thinking of Y/N, he could almost forget how others saw him. As a Prince of Darkness, someone to be feared, whose smile could even portend danger and violence. Ever was Aemond reminded of his great fortune in finding Y/N, who was somehow able to see past his harsh exterior and reach the good within him as no one else could, not even his mother or sister.

"These will do. Have them delivered to the Red Keep." Aemond assumed the dismissive and cold air he was sure the merchant expected, before heading back to the keep himself. He knew that he'd already been gone too long, and his absence would have been noted, at least by his mother and Aegon, who'd come to depend upon him in the small council. But his heart pulled him in the direction of his chambers.

Opening the door softly so as not to startle his wife if she were napping, knowing well how her pregnancy had exhausted her of late, Aemond's lips quirked up at the sight of his wife. He took advantage of the fact she had not yet noticed his presence to drink in her beauty, resplendent in the glow of the afternoon sun. Pacing over to her quietly, Aemond gently brought his hands to rest against her bump, though he dropped them quickly as Y/N winced and hunched over in pain. Had he perhaps underestimated his strength and grabbed her too harshly?

"Did I hurt you, my love?" Aemond grappled with his emotions to remain calm as Y/N remained silent, a look of wonder passing across her features.

"No, no. I'm fine. I felt the baby kick for the first time and was surprised. Here, can you feel it?"

Instantly, relief flooded through the prince, quickly replaced by a spark of excitement and curiosity at this most fundamental proof of the little life Y/N carried within her. Aemond pressed his hand to Y/N's bump, smiling as he felt the baby's tiny kicks against his palm. He was briefly stunned in to silence himself, overwhelmed by his love for both the child and its mother.

"My little dragon. I hope you will not give your mother too much trouble with your kicking."

Aemond looked from Y/N's eyes to her lips, leaning down to press his against hers tenderly and convey his devotion to her with this kiss.

From then on, Aemonds hands would always wander to Y/N's bump, hoping to feel their child's tiny kicks. He felt pride in the evidence of the child's strength and Targaryen heritage, placing his mothers hands upon Y/N's stomach excitedly a the queen dowager smiled at her lively grandchild. The prince thought the little drgaon must recognise his voice, for he was seldom left disappointed, much to his wife's chagrin who complained often of the baby's relentless kicking. Aemond knew that the baby's kicks were as reassuring to her as they were to him, though he did regret that the baby's restlessness did cause Y/N discomfort every time he saw her wince.

"I hope my child isn't giving you too much trouble, my love." He tutted softly at her bump as he grazed a hand up and down her spine soothingly.

Y/N huffed, shifting uncomfortably.

"Your child barely gives me a moment's rest. Certainly, they are the blood of the dragon."

Aemond stroked her hips sympathetically, wishing he knew of a way to help her. He felt guilty that she had to bear the burdens of pregnancy alone.

"Is it terribly painful, my darling?"

Y/N sighed, circling her arms around his neck and leaning her body against his. Aemond pressed her closer to him, only too eager to offer her comfort.

"It's not so bad, I'm glad our child is strong and it's comforting in a way. Don't look so anguished Aemond, I was only jesting before."

Aemond schooled his features into a more even tempered expression, pressing his lips to Y/N's temple. He was in awe of how strong his wife was, how brave she was in trying to brush aside her discomfort. But he did not wish her to feel as though she needed to suffer in silence or conceal her struggles from him.

"Is there anything I can do to ease your suffering?'

Aemond watched as Y/N began to play with the buttons of his tunic, an air of nervousness surrounding her movements. He wanted to hold her hand against his chest to stop her fidgeting and ease her nerves, unsure what had caused him. Instead, she surprised him with her next words before he could ask for the cause of her sudden change in demeanour.

"You can distract me..if you like." Aemond felt a wave of affectation wash over him at her request and the manner in which it was posed. He knew that shyness was simply in Y/N's nature, it did not matter that they were married, so he was more than used to her subtlety and took her meaning immediately. Grasping onto her hips, he moving his lips from her temple to graze her jawline instead.

"Anything to please my wife. I am a dutiful husband, after all." In seconds he'd swept her up into his arms, her shriek of surprise and subsequent giggles blending beautifully Aemond thought with the lower cadence of his own laugh. Y/N patted his shoulder affectionately.

"You won't be able to pick me up like this for much longer. I'll be too heavy."

Aemond, ever observant, noticed the real insecurity concealed beneath an air of humour.

"That's nonsense. When I hold you now, I'm holding my entire world."

Y/N pressed her face into Aemond's chest.

"You always say such romantic things when you know how it flusters me."

Aemond chuckled as he carried her towards their bed, amused by her trying to hide her reddened cheeks from him.

"Perhaps it is my intention to fluster you, little one." Y/N sighed exasperatedly as Aemond set her down. He did so love to see her blush.

"Don't tease me, it's mean." Aemond observed that Y/N stopped just shy of poking her tongue out at him. A devilish look lit the prince's eye as he climbed on top of her, humming thoughtfully as he slipped a hand underneath her skirts, stroking the sensitive skin on the inside of her thigh. Y/N inhaled sharply as his hand glided upwards painfully slowly, and he pressed a sensual kiss to the pulse point close to her ear.

"My sincere apologies. I'll have to make it up to you, wife."

Aemond's eye drank in Y/N's features as her eyes flutter shut.

"They'll miss you at the small council."

Aemond restrained a scoff at his wife's perpetual need to always do what was expected of them. He was tired of trying to play the perfect Prince, when everyone including himself knew that was not who he was. Besides, seeing Y/N pregnant with his child had only seemed to inflame the fiery passion he held for her, and he'd much rather spend all of his time between her legs if he could. He did spare his gentle, shy wife from putting it in such lewd terms.

Aemond hummed nonchantly, pressing a kiss to her collarbone as he let his hand slide upwards under her skirts, earning him a gasp from Y/N.

"I think you know there's nowhere else I'd rather be than here with you. Besides, my wife's comfort is a far more pressing matter to me"

Y/N laughed and pulled him closer to her. Aemond knew he would no doubt be called away sooner than he would like to deal with the ugly business of the war he'd had no small part in inciting. But for now, there was just her, who he loved, and the beautiful gift she carried within her womb.

While Aemond was a doting husband, he was often called away from Y/N's side to scout the skies on Vhagar or attend his brother, the King. She was proud of him for his sense of duty to his brother, but ever fearful that he might be called upon to battle. Ser Cristom Cole and Ser Gwayne Hightower, the queens affable and gentlemanly brother, had set out on the March months past, taking castle after castle in the crownlands. Y/N knew it was only a matter of time before a raven summoned Aemond to join them.

And yet, despite the omnipresent and oppressive shadow of war that cast a gloom upon the Red Keep, other worries gnawed at Y/N. As the months flew by and her bump grew in size, she began to realise the true weight of her situation and fear began to creep in of what she could expect in child birth. Her own mother had died when she was only young, and she had very little experience with labour. She daren't ask Helaena about her own labours, not wishing to trigger any traumatic memories, and the queen dowager, as well meaning as she was, only wanted to smooth over Y/N's concerns entirely and tell her that everything would come to her naturally. With such serious matters pressing upon Y/N's mind, she felt more than a little silly at her increasing insecurity in her own body.

As she grew out of her dresses and had to have more commissioned, she spent more and more time looking at her own reflection in the mirror, finding herself unrecognisable and worrying that Aemond might begin to feel the same. Entering their chambers, Y/N was surprised to find Aemond already settled in his favoured armchair reading from a book on the Dornish Wars. She must have tarried longer than she thought helping Helaena put Jahaera to bed.

Aemond's eyes lit up at the sight of her on the threshold, as if they'd been parted for years rather than mere hours, and he immediately held his arms out to her. Y/N's felt her heart stumble at his invitation, knowing he meant her to sit on his lap. But she only smiled at him, shaking her head softly as she approached the floor length mirror.

"I'm much too heavy for that now, husband."

Y/N saw Aemond's face fall at her words as she swept by him.

"Nonsense."

Planting herself in front of the mirror that had earned her enmity. Y/N initially started unpinning her hair but quickly began shifting to see her body at different angles.

"What are you doing, my love?"

Y/N stiffened at the sound of Aemond's voice, having almost forgotten he was there. She huffed with frustration at herself, though she did not avert her eyes from her reflection.

"Just taking note of how huge I've grown. I think I'll need new dresses again soon. This one is fit to burst."

Y/N heard rather than saw Aemond snap his book shut and rise from his favoured chair. She felt her heart beat faster with either nervousness or anticipation as Aemond approached her, sensing tension radiating from him. He hated when she would complain about her changed appearance, and was fastidious in his assertion that there was no other maiden so fair in Westeros. But it was difficult to believe that when Y/N had witnessed her body change drastically to the point she could scarcely recognise it as her own. She worried too whether it would be forever changed once she'd given birth...and whether Aemond would still think her beautiful even if it was. She supposed it was a silly think to worry about all things considered, especially when she'd grown to love the little dragon she carried in her womb so dearly. Y/N was stirred from her thoughts as she felt Aemond's hands press inisistently against her waist, his voice stern in her ear. "I thought I told you not to speak like that about yourself."

Y/N shivered lightly at his tone, no longer denying to herself that she was drawn to this more commanding side of him, which reminded her that he was a Targaryen Prince as well as her loving husband. She did not love him despite the darkness she knew he held within him. It was just another essential part of him she loved.

'Aemond, even you can no longer deny that I'm enormous." She laughed to hide her genuine insecurity, but it was a weak and unconvincing sound. Aemond tutted softly, squeezing her hips. She took a sharp intake of breath as he lowered his head to the crook of her neck and she felt his angular nose graze down her throat.

"Oh my love. Don't you know how beautiful you are? How radiant?" Y/N found herself unconsciously pressing herself further into Aemond's chest as his breath danced pleasantly across her skin, heating her blood, almost sagging against him entirely to her embarrassment as he pressed a slow kiss to her shoulder. Disarmed by Aemond's proximity, Y/N voiced the concern that that been eating away at her even in her happiness.

"I'm worried you won't always think so now that I'm so changed with this pregnancy."

Aemond kissed her temple affectionately.

"Impossible. You're perfect..my perfect wife who carries my child." Y/N let her eyes flutter closed as she heard the smile in Aemond's voice. She knew how proud and excited he was about their child.

Aemond was clearly displeased with her silence, humming thoughtfully as he always did.

"How can I convince you, my darling?" Y/N shrugged.

"I don't know."

She felt his hands shift to her back, his fingers weaving into the ribbon stays that held her dress together as he deftly began to untie them.

"Do you want me to show you?"

She shuddered, completly under the spell of his powerful voice and forgetting her concerns.

"What?" She didn't need him to clarify what he meant...but she wanted him to.

Aemond finished with the laces and let his hand glide down the smooth skin of her back.

"How perfect you are for me. How much I desire you, adore you."

Y/N brought her arm up to rest her hand against where she thought Aemond's cheek was, though she was hardly in control of her body or mind at his ministrations.

"Yes."

Aemond inclined his head down towards her so his hair tickled her neck and cheek. His voice was low and alluring.

'And you won't criticise yourself anymore?'

Y/N readily agreed, flustered and forgetting why she'd been so worried a few moments before.

'Yes.'

"Good girl."

He tugged impatiently on the sleeves of her dress, his growl of frustration as the material caught mingling with her laughter.

Cole had been on the March for months, and Rhaneyra had yet to concede the throne, so Aemond was not surprised when Cole's raven arrived, summoning him to Rooks Rest. Rhaenyra's complacency called for decisive action, and a dragon so close to Dragonstone would not be so easy to ignore as his mother's entreaties. Part of him was eager for battle, to prove himself, and to defend his brother's claim. That did not make telling his wife any easier. And so it was with a heavy heart and a bouquet of slightly crushed bluebells in his hand that he sought her out. He was concerned to find her sat in the middle of their bed, her head on her knees, and a look of anxiety of her face. Had she already heard news of his departure somehow?

"What's the matter, my darling?"

Y/N looked up at him in alarm, clearly startled from her thoughts.

"I'm frightened."

Aemond hadn't anticipated her directness, but he sought to ease her anxieties if he could. He would return to her and he wanted her to have faith in him that he would.

Stepping into the room and shutting the door softly behind him, he moved to sit on the edge of the bed. He took her hand gently in his, lacing their fingers together. Aemond had feared Y/N's reaction and expected hysteria rather than this eery calm, but this was just as unsettling.

"You need not fear. None of Rhaenyra's dragons can match Vhagar and my dragon is well seasoned in battle. I promise to return to you." Y/N looked puzzled by Aemond's words until everything seemed to click into place, and she ripped her hand from his. Rising to stand, she pushed his arms away as he tried to stop her flurried movements.

"You are to go into battle? Have you no thought to what it would do to me if something we're to happen to you?"

Aemond stared in shock at his enraged wife, realising too late that he'd mistaken her earlier words.

"You did not know? When you said you were afraid..."

Y/N looked at him desperately "Afraid to die in childbirth. I've heard such awful things about it and sought reassurance."

Aemond cursed his foolishness in jumping to conclusions, reaching for Y/N.

"I will not let that happen. You will have the best maesters and my mother will know exactly what to do. I promise..."

Y/N cut him off as he went to stroke her cheek, swatting his hand away.

"Don't make me promises you can't keep Aemond. Not when you fly towards danger, leaving your wife and unborn child to suffer your loss should you die in battle." Her words stung, but Aemond was more concerned with his wife's erratic breath and the tears that spilled down her cheeks. As she grew more hysterical, he wrapped his arms around her, despite her struggling, certain her distress could not be good for her of the baby.

"Would you leave me a widow?"

Aemond's heart clenched as her voice broke. Though he noted that her fingers gripped his arms now rather than pushed him away.

"Of course not. Have faith in me, my love. I will lay waste to these pretenders and return to you."

"You don't now that. You can't know that. You can't go" Y/N's words seemed to trail off and she suddenly sagged in his arms. Aemond panicked but quickly stopped her from falling as he caught her in a faint.

"Y/N. Y/N!" Aemond touched her face frantically, hoping she would wake, his chest seizing when she did not. Scooping her up in his arms and palcing her on the bed, he shouted to the guards outside the door to call for the maesters.

Y/N opened her eyes, briefly confused as to where she was until she recognised the patterns on the canopy above the bed and the unmistakable feel of Aemond's hand holding hers. Turning her head, she found him kneeling beside the bed, searching her face with a worried expression.

"What happened?"

"You fainted, my sweet girl"

Y/N's eyes widened in alarm.

"Is the baby alright?" She pushed the bed covers aside, desperate to check that her hysterical hadn't harmed their child, but her movements were arrested by Aemond's hands gripping hers.

"Perfectly fine, my love. The maesters have come and gone and found nothing amiss. You fell asleep shortly afterwards, that is all. But you must stay calm. Stress isn't good for you or the child."

Y/N felt tears well in her eyes, horrified that her behaviour could have harmed their baby. Aemond reacted instantly to her tears, rising to sit on the edge of the bed and brush them away with the pads of his fingers.

"Don't cry, my darling. Everything will be alright."

Y/N sat up and pressed her face into Aemond's chest, her sniffles resounding in the stillness of the night. He placed a hand on the back of her head, holding her to him and stroking her back comfortingly.

"Come back to me." Y/N knew he had to go, that he would want to. She could not stop the inevitable but only pray for her husband's safe return.

Aemond kissed the crown of her head, smoothing her hair down.

"I will."

Slight cliffhanger there. Sorry 😬 Sidenote, I'm obsessed with Aemonds little "hmm" he always does.

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[thebenjiblackwoodexpress]

please don't don't bad or like you have to answer, but I was wondering if Devils Snare is discontinued or whether there will be an update at some point? I just really love the series, and love the writing, but if not then no worries 😊

I'm so happy you love the series, it makes writing so worth it to know people are enjoying it :) It definitely isn't discontinued, a lot of the next part is written and that may or may not be the final part depending on how long it ends up being. I have also considered writing a few extra snippets from earlier parts that didnt make the cut. I hit a bit of a snag with updates as I've been super busy at work and moving house. Finally moving next week so hopefully will have more time. I'm terrible for slow updates but rlly hoping to get a new part up next week. I really appreciate your message ❤️

[thebenjiblackwoodexpress]

Snow Drop: Part 11

Description: Y/N contends with the shadow of her past and intense feelings of shame over thoughts she considers less than pure towards the Prince Jacaerys. Jacaerys is determined to show his lady that their love is true and she need not be ashamed of her desires, even if it requires a daring demonstration to prove it.

Writer's Note: This one was heavily influenced by 'Nosferatu', which Victoria is now obsessed with. I also briefly referenced the song, 'ordinary things (feat. Nonna)' from Ariana Grande's stunning album, Eternal Sunshine.

Dividers by @zaldritzosrose

Warnings: Female reader, mentions of past sexual assault and trauma, complicated feelings around sexuality.

Jacaerys ran a hand through his now tangled locks in frustration with himself. He had made a fool of himself by tumbling through her door in his concern that she was concealing her worsening condition from him. In the moment, he had been so relieved to see her recovering from her illness, having had many sleepless nights over it, he had not fully registered what a brute he had acted by forcing the door to her chambers. He place both hands in his hair again and pressed his forehead to his desk with a groan. She must have been frightened by his behaviour, he chastised himself, particularly given her history with another man who had tried to force himself on her. His eyes darkened in anger at the thought. He would deal with that scoundrel one day, of that he was most certain.

His anger quickly turned up in himself again, however, as he considered that his lady may have feared similar advances from him, given his forceful entry into her room. He practically jumped up from his desk at the thought and began pacing his chamber, turning over in his thoughts how he could possibly apologise and make amends for his behaviour. He never wished for her to feel unsafe with him or that he would not respect her boundaries, he had only lost his composure in fear that her condition had worsened and she was too selfless to tell him.

An involuntary smile softened his expression at the thought of her stubbornness. He did not think she would ever allow him to care for her without some degree of resistance. No matter, he was more than prepared to coax and kiss her into allowing him to do so. He sobered once again. That was, if she wasn't too frightened by his antics the evening before. He comforted himself with the memory of her kissing his cheek before he had left her that evening...she hadn't seemed afraid of him then. He would apologise nonetheless and assure her that he would never force his way into her space again. He wished for her to trust in him and feel safe around him and he would do everything in his power to distinguish himself from that other rogue who had hurt her.

As the morning light filtered through his window, casting shadows along the flagstone floor, a look of determination simultaneously lit up Jacaerys' features. Whilst still early for the royal household, Jacaerys had memorized his love's schedule by this point and knew she would have already risen to begin her duties. He rose from his desk with urgency and exited his chambers in the direction of the Sea Dragon Tower, where he knew she would have begun her cleaning duties.

He knew his love too well to believe she would have heeded his entreaty the night before that she continued to rest until she was completely well. An indulgent half-smile softened his features, and he shook his head at the thought. She would make a formidable Targaryen princess and consort if he was already having trouble getting her to listen to him. Good, she would fit into her role and his family perfectly, and he was sure that their subjects would be as charmed by her and as willing to acquiesce to her every order as he was himself. His heart warmed at the thought.

Y/N smiled absent mindedly as she dusted the grotesque crenelations hanging upon the walls, shaped like basilisks, griffins and wyverns. Normally, these brooding gargoyles would leave her feeling uneasy and she would hurry to complete her survey of the sombre tower, not liking to be alone for so long with such creatures glaring at her from every corner.

Since Jacaerys had learned of her uneasiness in this room, he had made it a habit to rise earlier than he was wont to to keep her company whilst she carried out her duties. At first she had thought his actions strange, but upon questioning him her heart stuttered at the realisation that he was rising early before his own duties so that she would feel safe.

Not wishing to embarrass her, but unable to completely resist from teasing her a little, Jacaerys had responded by tapping the hilt of his sword and smirking at her. "Fear not my love, your prince will defend you from any beast that dares to frighten you, be they living or inanimate", he winked conspiratorially.

She had blushed furiously at his admission, only gaining a laugh from Jacaerys who nonetheless sought to appease her by wrapping her in an embrace. "I only jest, my dove. Do not be angry with me." She had broken into a smile herself, unable to maintain her stern expression as he held her in his arms. "You are a menace." Jacaerys' smile widened at her epithet, realizing at this point that an insult was often a sign of affection from his lady. He knew that she appreciated his assiduous care and concern for her happiness and wellbeing, even if she preferred to call it his 'hen-pecking', much to his chagrin. His company was a most welcome addition to her morning duties, though he grumbled the whole time that she should not have to do anything she thought unpleasant if she would only marry him.

Y/N laughed quietly at the memory of the characteristic pout he would assume when chastising her on this point. She could very easily silence him, she discovered, if she pressed her lips to his, leaving him with a dazed expression on his face when she broke the kiss. She had to laugh when he would reach his arms out to encircle her waist and try to pull her down to his lap into another embrace. Y/N enjoyed teasing the usually serious prince, tapping his chest playfully with her feather duster before she continued with her work.

Upon entering the Sea Dragon Tower, Jacaerys let out a sigh at seeing his lady dusting the gargoyles adorning the walls, routinely struck anew by her beauty and the wave of affection and love for her that always swept over him at the sight of her; there would never be an ordinary moment with her, her very presence investing the sombre darkness of the forbidding room with light for him.

He would normally have bounded up to her, impatient to gather her into his arms, but he found himself hesitating on the threshold of the door. He feared that she may not be pleased to see him, perhaps even angry with him for his transgressions the evening before, so a moment of hesitation passed before he found the courage to enter the room, and Y/N's head snapped up at the sound of his boots against the flagstone floor.

Having prepared for her to chastise him and to apologise profusely to her, he was pleasantly surprised to see her pretty features light up into a smile at the sight of him. He was even more delighted, almost believing himself to have passed into a dream of his own imagining, when she lightly tripped over to him and wrapped her arms around his torso, placing her head on his chest. He eagerly responded to her embrace, enwrapping her in his arms as he stroked her hair tenderly. "What have I done to merit such a greeting, little dove? I half expected I would need to get on my knees and beg your forgiveness for my behaviour last night. Instead I am rewarded for my transgressions by your embrace, my love."

Y/N looked up in confusion at his contrite tone. "Whatever can you mean, Jacaerys? I don't hold you falling through a door against you, if that is your concern," she laughed. "You're still as princely a figure to me as you were before you tumbled through my bedroom door." Jacaerys blushed and pouted a little at being reminded of his less than princely behaviour, though he was pleased she was amused by his antics rather than afraid that he meant to harm her by his intrusion. He didn't think he would be able to endure it if she had been afraid of him.

"So...he hesitated, you were really not frightened by my bold intrusion into your chambers last night? I swear it was only out of concern for you. I would never have tried to force entry into your room in any other circumstances' he rushed out, before she pressed her fingertips to his lips to stop his anxious outburst.

"Don't be silly, Jacaerys. I'm not afraid of you. I love you." His eyes widened at this, his heart skipping a beat, struck anew by the wondrous feeling of being loved by such a sweet creature. He closed his eyes and held her hand to his cheek as she pressed her palm to it. "I am relieved to hear it, my darling. I worried that my behaviour might have brought up unpleasant associations for you...that you might have been afraid lest I had ill intentions. I always want you to feel safe with me." He met her gaze with such warmth and love in his eyes and Y/N was moved by his earnest concern and sensitivity to her past traumas that she encircled her arms around his neck, wanting to be closer to him and reassure him that she felt safe with him.

Jacaerys lowered his torso to make it easier for her to reach him, wrapping his own arms protectively around her waist. "It is because you have always been so gentlemanly and considerate about my feelings that I knew you meant what you said when you told me you loved me and it never entered my head that you meant to harm me." He instinctively gripped her waist tighter at this admission, closing his eyes tightly, pained at the thought that someone had ever harmed her before and he had not been there to prevent it...and despatch the offender. He leant down and pressed a soft, lingering kiss to her forehead before burying his head in the crook of her neck.

Continuing to stroke her hair protectively, he murmured against her skin, "I will always protect you" before pressing his lips to the point between her neck and collar bone. "I know," she whispered, entangling a hand in his hair. He continued to hold her in his arms, settling his head on her shoulder as she tightened her arms around his neck, drawing as much comfort from the embrace as he hoped she did. Both lovers felt that the other was holding their whole person, body and soul, in this embrace.

Though happier than she had ever been, secure in Jacaerys' love for her, Y/N continued to struggle against lurking feelings of inadequacy and guilt she couldn't easily explain to him. The more comfortable she became with seeking out Jacaerys' physical affection, she would find this dark feeling clawing it's way to the surface of her mind. Her previous physical experience with a man had left her with deep feelings of shame and guilt: perhaps it was her fault that he should have been led to believe such advances would be welcomed. Perhaps she was too forward, too affectionate. Perhaps she should be ashamed of her desire for Jacaerys too. She feared he would even be disappointed or ashamed of her if he suspected how much she really loved and wanted him, how much she wanted to touch him and for him to hold her. She knew how important the notion of purity was to Jacaerys' conception of the Targaryen dynasty, and she began to fear that this would extend to her, though he had reassured her most fervently that she was not to blame for her past experiences with a man who did not deserve her love and trust.

He had always stressed to her that what had happened to her was not her fault, that it was an assault and not to be confused with the physical love between two people who loved and respected each other. She was keen to bury the subject away, though Jacaerys had been insistent upon stressing to her that she shouldn't repress her trauma, but confide in him.

She remembered after she had recovered from her initial distress at revealing a memory she had buried so deeply in a shameful corner of her mind, he had gently taken hold of her hand to place it on his chest, exactly over his heart. Looking into her eyes with such love, he had proceeded to speak in a firm yet soft tone. "How you are touching me now is a good touch. I have consented to it and it is pleasurable and comforting to me." He had then placed his hand on her cheek with a feather light touch, stroking the pad of his thumb across her jaw. "Are you comfortable with me touching you in this way, my Dove?" She had met his gaze quizzically at this question, having been sure he should need no such reassurance, since she had already allowed him to touch her in this way so many times. "Of course, Jacaerys." He smiled reassuringly at her response. "Why is that?" "I...I don't know what you mean Jacaerys?"

She couldn't understand what he was aiming at. She loved him and had told him as much, why should he need to ask? "You do, darling. I know it may seem odd to you, me asking you this. I fear that others have not asked before," his eyes darkened, "but it is important, so I must ask you to answer me, if you can." He looked so earnest that she felt she must try for him, even if she did think it silly. "Because...I feel safe with you," she hesitated and he nodded encouragingly, continuing to caress her cheek. "Good, my love, continue." "Because I love you and I know you love me" she blushed, starting to duck her head in embarrassment before he brought his other hand up to hold her head in place, directed towards his eyes. "No, no, don't be embarrassed, darling. That's good, that's important. Is there anything else?" Encouraged by his coaxing, seeing that he was aiming at something important to him, she added the final reason she could think of. "Because you have never done anything to make me uncomfortable...I have never been afraid that you would hurt me." He nodded so encouragingly at her then, before removing his hands from her face and holding his arms out to her. "May I hold you?" Immediately seeking out his embrace, she placed her head on his chest, comforted by the soft beat of his heart under his tunic.

He wrapped an arm around her torso to hold her against him whilst his other hand cradled her head protectively. "My questions may seem silly to you, little Dove, but that is only because you have never been told how important it is for you to feel what you have so patiently described for me, when someone is touching you. What you have experienced before was not love, it was violence. I do not wish for you to confuse the two. It is important that you know the difference and understand that you can always tell me if something makes you uncomfortable, if you don't want me to touch you in a certain way or...if you do" he added, in a slightly bashful tone.

He pulled away from her only slightly so that he could meet her gaze. "Love is choice. It should never be forced or solicited without both parties' consent. I want you to understand that you can feel safe to touch me, he placed her palm on his cheek, "and to either solicit or reject my touch, with the full assurance that that is for you to choose, and for me to heed." Y/N met Jacaerys' gaze now with a light of understanding, tears glistening in her eyes.

No one had ever cared to explain this to her before, and so she had always carried a certain guilt within her that what had occurred had in some way been her fault. She was moved by his attempt to assure her that her choice and boundaries were things to be respected and honoured. That there was a difference between love and what she had experienced in the past, which she had long come long to expect as the only outcome of the advances of men.

Despite Jacaerys' reassurances that there was nothing in her past that should cause her even a moment's feeling of guilt or shame, Y/N found herself becoming more and more hesitant to either accept or solicit his affection. The more she found herself desiring his touch, the more guilty she felt, as if she were somehow impure for wanting him like that. She grew ashamed of herself every time she caught herself gazing at his lips, or wanting him to touch her, and would immediately recoil from his touch, making an excuse to leave his presence. Jacaerys had noticed his love growing increasingly more hesitant to touch him over the course of a few days and accepted it. She had only just felt comfortable enough to confide in him about such a traumatic moment from her past. It was not to be wondered at if she was more avoidant of touch, even if it was his loving touch. He would respect her wishes and not solicit any touch if he thought it would not be wanted at this time.

However, he did begin to grow really concerned when he saw how genuinely anxious she looked when she had embraced him one day and he had eagerly responded by kissing her cheek. She had immediately recoiled, and he was horrified to see a look of fear on her face. He gripped onto her forearms before he could think better of it. "What's wrong, my dove. Have I frightened you?" He enquired anxiously. He became even more worried that he had overstepped her boundaries when she quickly removed herself from his arms and stuttered out a response. "No, no...I just remembered I'm wanted somewhere else." Jacaerys was left stunned and horrified that he had frightened her with his affections as he watched her flee from the room. He resolved that he would not follow her now, not when his presence seemed to have caused her such distress, though it pained him to see her leave him in such a state of anxiety, possibly because of something he had done. He would beg her forgiveness later and hope that he could make amends for his transgressions.

Y/N chastised herself, as she arranged Jacaerys' desk in his room, for having put on such an embarrassing display before him earlier that day. He must have thought her very silly for immediately pushing him away and running away after she had just embraced him, but she couldn't help it. After Jacaerys had kissed her on the cheek, she had immediately wanted to feel his lips on her own and was overcome by a feeling of such intense shame that she had to leave him, unable to conceal her feelings. She hoped he wouldn't be angry with her. She loved him too much to lose him over something so silly. As she began to fold a stray cloak he had left on a chair, she resolved that she would apologise to him for acting in such a bizarre manner, and try to conceal her anxieties from him in future. No sooner had she made this resolution than the very Prince she had just been thinking of entered the room.

She panicked when he freeze at the sight of her, a shocked expression on his face. He must be angry with her then. She immediately ran up to him and buried her head in his chest, gripping his tunic like a lifeline. "I'm sorry for behaving like that earlier, Jacaerys. Please don't be angry with me, I won't be like that anymore." It was true that Jacaerys was momentarily surprised to see his love in his chambers, fearing that he had really displeased her, but he was shocked to see her so panicked and hear that she feared him to be angry with her. She had done nothing to solicit such a response from him, he was concerned only that he had upset her. In his shock at this unforeseen turn of events, he did not realise that he had not yet answered her, and became truly panicked when he heard her sniffles and felt his tunic becoming wet with her tears.

Mentally shaking himself, he cradled her head in his hands to see her face. "Hush, hush, whatever can you mean, little dove? I am not angry with you and I am most sorry for having given you that impression. In fact, I was about to go to you to apologise for heaving merited your disfavour earlier and was only surprised and gladdened to find that you were already here. It is for me to apologise to you for overstepping your boundaries earlier. I should have realised that you may not wish for me to touch you like that after what you told me not a few days past. Please accept my forgiveness and my word that I won't touch you like that again unless you ask me to." He was saddened and alarmed to see that her expression only seemed to become more anxious as he spoke, the tears continuing to pool in her eyes.

He wrapped his arms around her to comfort her, not knowing what to do to make amends. "That is not...that isn't. Oh I don't know how to explain." Jacaerys stroked her cheek and nodded encouragingly at her. "Try, I will listen." She worried her bottom lip between her teeth and hesitated before she began to explain. "It isn't that I don't want you to touch me that made me leave so abruptly. It's that I do" Jacaerys caressed her cheek with the pad of his thumb, "Do what, my love?" She looked away from him then, "I do want you to touch me." Jacaerys grew confused then, not realising why this would upset her, but resolved to get to the bottom of it. Turning her chin gently so she met his gaze again, he softly questioned, "and what's wrong with that?" She looked so troubled by his question, her bottom lip wobbling that he could not stop himself from pulling her more tightly towards him, urgently stroking her cheek. She spoke so quietly that he had to lean down to hear her. "It's wrong for me to want you like that. It's not pure. I feel as if...I’m not pure. You wouldn't want me anymore if you knew how much I want you. How I want you. You always speak of the importance of maintaining the purity of the Targaryen dynasty," she trailed off.

Jacaerys was momentarily stunned. He could never have anticipated that this would be a fear for her. That his darling girl, his pure dove, the only light in the darkness of Dragonstone, could believe her desire for his love and touch to be impure. He had never meant for her to take his words about the Targaryen line to be directed at her. He had only meant that he did not wish for the line to be sullied by traitors and usurpers like the Greens. He cursed himself for not having been clearer, for having only added to her anxieties when he had always meant to alleviate them. More disturbing still was the implications of her apology to him. Jacaerys felt physically unwell when the weight of her previous words fully registered for him. They echoed in his mind now: "I won't be like that anymore." His heart dropped into his stomach. Did she mean that she would allow him to touch her, even if it made her uncomfortable, because she believed she could keep his affections no other way? He could only understand it as the result of her previous experience with physical touch making her belief that it was something to be ashamed of. His heart constricted painfully at the thought. He grew even more determined than he had been before that he would deal with the scoundrel who had left her feeling so ashamed of her own desires and so willing to bypass her own boundaries to keep him. As if she would ever need to do such a thing! He would lover her and cherish her if she never wanted his touch in that way. The love between them was of that between souls, a bond that could never be severed.

A look of determination alighted in his eyes. He would show her that her desire for him and his for her, was built upon the purest love and respect. Far from being buried and treated as something to be ashamed of, she should fully embrace it. But he was also most anxious to show her that her boundaries were important to him and that she should always tell him if she was uncomfortable about anything. He would always love her and want her, in whatever way she would allow. It wouldn't matter if she never wanted him to touch her in a certain way, as long as she still wanted his love. Jacaerys realised he'd let too much time elapse between her words and him resolving all this in his head when she lightly pushed him away from her and took several steps back towards a nearby pillar, placing a distance between them, a look of despair on her pretty face. "I told you," she sniffled, "you are disgusted with me."

Jacaerys strode towards her and immediately closed the distance between them, placing a hand against the pillar beside her head, and weaving another around her waist,  imprisoning her within his arms. "No darling, don't say that. You’re absolutely fine, there's nothing wrong with you. I love and respect you. Adore you. Worship you. I am sorry that you have been made to feel this way and have suffered such feelings alone. I wish you had felt comfortable enough to confide in me before." He held her tightly to him and turned her face once again to his, preventing her from evading his gaze. It was important, now more than ever, that she should listen to him and see the truth of his words behind his eyes. "Your desires are nothing to be ashamed of. I want you to want me," he tentatively brushed his fingers against her waist, "to desire me," he gripped her waist more possessively, when she did not move. He leant down slowly, brushing his lips against her jaw, just below her ear  so that he could whisper "as I want and desire you." He felt her shudder against him as he said this and grip onto his tunic with a hand. She gazed into his eyes for a long moment then, before she seemed to find what she had been looking for in them and he sighed in relief as he felt her relax against his touch. "I don't know.." she hesitated and he waited patiently for her to finish. "I have always felt that it was shameful or unclean for a woman to have these desires. That others would see that as impure, that I couldn't want that."

Jacaerys eyebrows furrowed, his warm brown eyes filled with concern and love for her. Tenderly tucking a lose tendril of her behind her ear, he brought a hand up to caress her cheek. "They have not seen our love. I assure you, my love, that nothing could be further from the truth. Any desire you have could never be impure. Women should be free to experience the same love and desire men do without feeling any shame." He lowered his voice again, hovering his lips teasingly over the surface of her neck as he gripped her waist more possessively. "To have their desires satisfied by the man they love." He smiled roguishly when he noticed the blush blooming on his little dove's cheeks. He couldn't help teasing her a little, though he was entirely in earnest. He would have to establish one point before he continued any further, however. Pulling away so that he could meet her gaze. "I need to be sure of one thing, my little dove. I never wish for you to feel that my affections are only to be retained by you bypassing your own boundaries because you think it will please me. The very thought of it breaks my heart. It pains me to think that you do not understand the depth of my love for you and only you, not for anything you can give me beyond your love. It is not a physical thing which ties us together but a love, which tethers our very souls together. I will never cease to love you, no matter what form you allow me to show it."

He waited anxiously for his love to absorb his words, as she met his gaze. Though he was eager to embrace her, he was determined to convince her of the unshakeable, eternal nature of his love first. He needed to be sure that she wanted his touch before he went any further. He was equal parts surprised and delighted when she gripped onto his tunic with both hands, slowly pulling him down towards her, before she hesitantly whispered next to his jaw, "I want you to show me."

Jacaerys needed no further instruction from his love. He swept her into his arms, encircling her waist and shoulders as he pressed her gently against the pillar behind her, feeling her melt into his touch. He crashed his lips onto her own, feeling her wrap her arms around his neck. Their mouths moved urgently and hungrily in unison, both as desperate to feel the other's touch. With each brush of his lips against hers and each caress of her waist and forearm, he hoped to show her that he not only welcomed her desire for him, but that it was also not something to be ashamed of, but embraced. He broke contact with her lips, bringing a hand to her face and tightening his hold of her waist to arch her back so he could access her neck. He knew that she particularly liked when he kissed her there and was eager to show her that her pleasure was of the utmost importance to him. He placed an experimental kiss to her jaw, then another and another, encouraged by her sigh of pleasure, before trailing a line of lingering, soft kisses to her throat, all the way down to her collar bone.

Pulling her flush against him with one arm around her torso and another around her shoulders to support her as he tilted her back in his arms, Jacaerys continued to trail a line of kisses down from her collarbone to her chest, leaving her breathless, before pressing his lips to the precious space where he could feel her heart beating quickly. The thought that it was his own touch that caused it to beat so rapidly left his own heart stuttering, as he pressed two more reverent kisses to the same place. He was gratified to hear her sharp intake of breath, as she gripped onto his tunic, pulling him closer.

He paused then, his lips still hovering over her collar bone, checking that she was still comfortable with this touch before he continued. "Kiss me again," she whispered. Pressing another lingering kiss to her collarbone, Jacaerys responded in a low tone, "where, my princess?" happy to take orders from her. He would be only too pleased to acquiesce to any request she had, an uncommon feeling for a Prince used to ordering others.

Her voice came out quiet and breathless. "My heart." Jacaerys' felt his own heart skipping a beat at her request, realising that this was her way of telling him that she had understood what he had meant when he had pressed her hand to his own heart. She would always be loved and safe with him and that his love would come with no conditions or expectations of anything beyond what she wanted to share with him. Not only this, but that she now understood that her own desire wasn't something shameful to be suppressed, but something she should openly embrace and express to him.

Giving into the ecstasy of her touch, Jacaerys' own hands slid slowly from her waist, down past her hips to her thighs, before gripping onto the back of them to lift her entirely off the ground and hold her against him. For a second, he feared he had gone too far, that he might have frightened her. His fears were quickly allayed when she tightened her legs around his torso, and he became lost in the dizzying sensation of her, by turns, caressing and tugging his hair. He still had enough presence of mind to understand that she was reassuring him, as much as he was her, by touching him in this way; she was reminding him that she loved him completely, loved that part of himself that he had always found shameful, even if he himself could not reconcile himself to it.

 Y/N placed an index finger under Jacaerys' chin, leading him back up to her lips, which he immediately recaptured. He smiled against her lips, pleased at how confidently she was instructing him, secure in the knowledge that he would never judge her for any desire she had. Far from it, he was only too eager to please her. He kissed her again and again, as if she were the oxygen he was dying for.

He shuddered as he felt her hands slowly slide up his chest to his shoulders before she cupped one hand around the back of his neck. He leant his whole body into her touch, pushing her back further against the pillar she leant against as he tightened his grip on her waist. It was important to him that she felt comfortable enough to initiate physical contact with him. He wanted her to understand that he needed her touch just as much as she appeared to want his. He felt her fingertips move from his neck to tangle at the bottom of his hair, and he moaned as she experimentally tugged on his hair at the nape of his neck. Encouraged by his response, she pressed her lips to his more hungrily than before, teeth grazing his bottom lip as she entangled both hands in his hair.

Jacaerys only broke contact when he grew concerned that if he was struggling for breath, she must really be, but he pressed his forehead to hers affectionately as they both caught their breath. He slowly slid her back down to the ground, though he immediately encircled his arms around her waist, unwilling to let her go just yet, and smiled as she played bashfully with the brooch that held his cloak in place over his tunic. Leaning down, he kissed her cheek and wrapped her in an embrace, leaning his head upon hers. "I love you, Y/N. Your desires are not something to be ashamed of. In fact," he leaned back so she could see his expression as he wriggled his eyebrows suggestively, "I actively encourage them."

Y/N immediately responded by slapping his chest in admonishment. "Don't be such a tease, Jacaerys. I just know you're going to be insufferable now." Jacaerys laughed before leaning down once again to whisper against her jaw, "I thought you liked that about me?" He eagerly moved to connect their lips when he saw her turn her head as if to meet his, and was surprised when the little minx quickly side stepped him instead, skipping a few paces away from him. It would not be the first time she had surprised him like this and had him running round tables in pursuit of her. She laughed at his look of bewilderment, his arms still held out where she had been a moment before. "No Jacaerys," she took a step closer to him, leaning her head up to meet his gaze as he automatically tilted his down. She wrapped a hand around his neck so she could whisper against his cheek, "you like that about me" before she kissed his jaw and quickly evaded his arms to leave the room, giggling at his dazed expression.

It wouldn't do to let her Prince become too arrogant, she reasoned. An involuntary smile made its way onto Jacaerys' face. She little knew how much he liked that about her. He would follow her anywhere.

[thebenjiblackwoodexpress]

The Blackwood Knight: Troublesome Suitors

Description: In which the Blackwood Knight must fend off some troublesome suitors vying for his fair lady's hand.

Writer's Note: Hi all! Been a long time since I posted any 'Blackwood Knight' related content but this is an outtake/extra part of that story, if you will. It may be the prelude to another story/sequel (*wink, wink*). Not sure if this is still of interest to anyone, but had an idea so thought I'd run with it. There was a request from a very kind reader (@rebeccawinters) to write more in this series, so consider this a taste of more to come.

Warning: Brief mention of non con kiss. Female reader.

Dividers by @zaldritzosrose

A gentle breeze fluttered the golden leaves of the Brackentree, overhead, under which a lady and a Knight were ensconced. The lady looked down nervously at the tome open on her lap, still nervous that the Knight next to her would grow bored of hearing her speak of her favourite stories, though he had not yet, after a week of meeting at this tree. She little knew how fascinated Benji was to hear this lovely girl talk to him on whatever subject she chose, especially her stories, since they revealed so much of her character and interests. He admired the beauty of her mind as much as her person, and that of the ideal world she had built in her mind; a world in which loyalty and honour stood for something more than swearing fealty to the next usurper to make a claim for the throne. Perhaps they could build that world together, thought he, smiling softly down at her as she continued to talk about her book. He found her intermittent stutters and nervous avoidance of his eyes endearing and sweet, though he wished that she would feel comfortable in his presence. Benji frowned as he saw Y/N shudder slightly for the second time in a few minutes, realising that she must be cold.

Swiftly unclasping his cloak from around his neck, he gently wrapped it around her shoulders, holding her shoulders affectionately for a moment longer than he needed to. His heart stuttered as she turned her pretty face to look inquisitively up at him, and he found himself stuttering a reply. "Forgive me for my presumption, I thought you might be cold." He held his breath as she tilted her head curiously at him, fearing he had offended her, but she only rewarded him with a sweet, shy smile before returning her gaze to her book. He smiled to himself smugly as he noticed a light dusting of pink on her cheeks. Leaning back against the tree complacently, he shuffled slightly closer so that his shoulder could brush hers. Looking at her out of the corner of his eye to gage her reaction, he was further gratified when she did not stiffen in the slightest and only continued to tell him about her book.

After a few moments she grew silent and her brows furrowed together in a look of worry. Leaning down to meet her gaze, he questioned frantically, “what's wrong? Have I done something to upset you?” Y/N quickly refuted this, shaking her head and waving her hand as if dismissing the issue. “Oh no, not at all, I was only thinking about something displeasing. No matter”' and with that, she smiled up at him. Her quick dismissal of an issue, which was clearly bothering her, concerned Benjicot, demonstrative of a lack of concern for herself and a lack of belief that anyone would care about something worrying her. He would have to remedy this. Anything that concerned her concerned him, and he would fix it if he could. Speaking softly, or as softly as he could, he sought to ascertain the cause of her worry. “I would be grateful if you would tell me what concerns you, my Lady.”

She titled her head inquisitively at him, once again, as if surprised he would care, but answered him hesitantly. 'It is only that my Lord Uncle has been quite insistent in urging me to consider potential suitors of late and I would rather he was not so. I find it difficult enough being forced to talk to people I do not care for, let alone suitors who have no real interest in my person, just what a marriage between our Houses could do for their own personal gain.” She said all of this without taking a breath, her frustration barely concealed, but she immediately looked bashfully after she had finished, as if half expecting Benji to reprimand her for such openness. The dark expression on his face only seemed to confirm this fear and she stuttered out an apology. “Pay me no heed, it is a foolish thing to complain of. I know I will have to marry eventually, but I cannot imagine marrying a man I did not at least like or respect.”

As she looked away from the Knight beside her in embarrassment, she internally rebuked herself for her complaining. Her internal tirade was cut short by Benji interjecting in a soft, almost coaxing tone. She thought she imagined him moving his hand closer to hers on the ground so that their fingers could touch, a comforting gesture. But perhaps he had not realised how close they were, she reminded herself. “When you do marry, it should not be to a man you merely like or respect.” “No?” She questioned tentatively, surprised to see a warmth in Benji's eyes, as he gazed down at her, his face closer to hers than she had previously thought. “It should be to a man who adores you and loves  respects your whole person; not only the beauty of your outward person, but also your mind”. Y/N's mouth parted in silent shock at Benji's outburst before she turned away, growing bashful at his description of her as 'beautiful'. Benji gently turned her chin back to face him, determined that she should fully internalise his words. “For you are beautiful, in your physical person and your mind, which is like a diamond, clear and dazzling.”

 He bent lower to her face, noses nearly brushing as he half-whispered. “The man who you marry will not only see this, but do everything in his power to protect such beauty. I know I would.” Y/N emitted a nervous laugh before releasing herself from Benji's grasp on her chin, and turning away from him once again, though she nestled herself closer to him all the same. Benji satisfied himself that he had made his point and that if his lady did not entirely take his full meaning, the confession of love behind his words, she would at least understand her worth. A moment of silence passed before Y/N quietly said words which had Benji's heart soaring. “None of them are as polite and kind as you. They do not understand me as you do or even care to.”

Benji took a deep breath, feeling his heart swell at her sweet words. Perhaps Rob was wrong. Perhaps she could grow to love him and would one day accept his hand in marriage. His joy was cut short, however, by his lady's next words, muttered quietly under her breath, as if she was unsure whether or not she wanted him to hear. “I know that they mock me for my shyness and see me as no more than a bargaining chip.” Benji's next words came out stiff, through gritted teeth. “These suitors,” he spat out, as if the word was distasteful, “bother you? Are insolent enough to be rude to you?” His anger was rising in his chest, his fist clenching into a tight ball at his side as he immediately began planning how to despatch any man who insulted his lady. The next moment he found himself relaxing and assuming a dazed expression as the lovely lady next to him surprised him by turning her pretty features upon him in a look marked with the utmost concern.

Raising her hand to his head, she pressed the back of it against his forehead and he had to force himself not to close his eyes at the feel of her hand upon him. Instead he looked down at her speechless, as she urgently enquired into his wellbeing. "Are you well Benji? You look flushed, is something the matter?" She looked briefly confused at his lack of response, which she began to grow concerned was only further evidence of an incipient illness.

In truth, the normally formidable Benjicott Blackwood was left utterly in awe of the beauty and gentleness he saw before him, hardly believing it was directed towards him. He very nearly forgot himself and swept the angelic creature before him into his arms then and there but, reminding himself that she was shy and probably did not reciprocate his love for her, he restrained himself, even if he did lean into her touch. Lowering his face towards her, pulled almost by a magnetic force he spoke in a soft tone. "No, my Lady, I am perfectly well, thank you. I am only unhappy to hear of your own troubles and would remedy them if I could. Would you...” He hesitated, seeking to indirectly gain her permission to despatch, remove, he corrected himself, these troublesome suitors for her. “Yes?” She asked in that straightforward way she always did. It was one of the things he loved most about her. She had an innocence, almost like a baby deer encountering the world for the first time, in how she perceived the world and communicated her thoughts. He could not understand how she had been mocked for such transparency in a world of vipers and lickspittles. He knew only too well what he would do to the people who had ever made her feel inadequate about the very traits he found so enchanting about her. He'd planned each of their murders in great detail. Not that he would ever tell her that. The aim was not to frighten her, but to win her love.

He'd have to be indirect about his approach to these suitors, lest the sweet creature next to him looking at him with her crystal blue eyes should grow suspicious of their sudden absence. He'd have to pick them off one by one. “Would you be opposed to these suitors disappearing, entirely coincidentally of course,” he added, hurriedly. He could almost hear Rob's patronising voice in his mind: “real smooth, Benjicott”. “That would be too convenient,” She sighed. Benji smirked slightly, that was all the permission he needed to remove these irritating obstacles from his lady's sight...and his path to win her hand to him.. He was snapped out of his malevolent thoughts, once again, by the soft voice of the lady next to him. “What are you thinking of Benji? You have that odd expression on your face you usually have when I talk about Edmund. Are you...angry with me? We don't have to talk about this anymore if it bothers you.” She spoke hurriedly, turning her reddening face away from him in embarrassment, clearly believing herself to be the cause of Benjicot’s ire.

Benjicot’s eyes widened with alarm and he grabbed her delicate hand in his own and held her shoulder gently with his other, before he could think better of it. Y/N's her head snapped up to meet his at his sudden touch, surprised by the almost tender way he had encased her hand and shoulder in his hands, gently turning her toward him. “Sweet...” Y/N's eyes widened at what she thought sounded like...but it couldn't be, she chastised herself. Why would Benji, a Knight who could probably had a vast entourage of ladies interested in him, possibly be about to call her 'sweet heart.'

After a moment of hesitation, Benji continued, only a slight tension in his jaw revealing his frustration at having allowed his love for the lady before him to nearly result in a misstep that may have had her fleeing from his presence before he could stop her. He could not risk losing her by frightening her with the ardency of his feelings when he was certain she did not feel the same. He sought to correct his mistake as quickly as possible, lest she realise what he had nearly said and flee. “You are very sweet, my Lady, but I wish you to know that you could never anger or annoy me. Everything and anything you have to say to me is of the highest importance to me and if I do appear angry, it is only on your behalf. These ignorant pups have no business intruding themselves upon your presence. I would chase them off if I could.” Benji was equally surprised and delighted to hear his quiet lady, usually so reserved and shy, even with him, break into playful laughter at his last comment - which he had meant in all seriousness. He could not contain the smile that spread across his features as she continued to laugh, her hand pressed to her lips as if to suppress her mirth. He playfully nudged her shoulder, before leaning down conspiratorially to her level. “And what, may I ask, is the cause of your laughter my Lady?”

Still struggling to contain her laughter, Y/N met Benji's gaze with a dazzling smile, like the light dappling a woodland, as she responded. “It is only the thought of you chasing those intolerable suitors off. I suppose one look from you would have them running”, she jested. Benji smirked at this, lowering his head teasingly, seeing her face redden as he drew closer, though she did not move away from him, much to his pleasure. Tilting his head, he whispered by her ear, “am I really so formidable, my Lady? I hope you do not find me frightening”. Sensing she was flustered by his close proximity by the way she was tensed, he reluctantly drew back, though he watched her expression carefully. She could little guess how important her answer to his question was to him. He thought he could hardly bare it if she answered in the affirmative...that she was afraid of him too, just like everyone else seemed to be, Bracken or otherwise.

To the rest of the Riverlands, even his own kin and bannermen, he was known as ‘Bloody Benjicot’, and not for nothing. He protected Blackwood lands from Bracken incursions with a ferocity that lent weight to the appellation. Nevertheless, he never wished for the gentle lady before him to view him as such. From their very first meeting and, even before that, when he had only watched her from afar, he had felt a deep desire to protect her. Much to his surprise and delight, she had appeared to view him as such since he had first defended her from her incorrigible peacock of a cousin who, he reminded himself, still needed a plucking for his crimes against her. Beyond her habitual timidity, she had never seemed to fear him. After he had watched her walk back to her home that first day of their meeting, he had feared that he would never see her again, but she had returned each day to the Brackentree, bordering his lands.

Never seeming surprised to see him waiting for her, she appeared contented at the sight, quickly nestling down next to him to discuss her books or her day or anything. It was all as interesting to Benji, since it concerned her - the lady he loved and adored more than anything in this life, even his own lands. She was the only person who had seen him not only for who he was, but who he could be: a Knight whose trenchant sense of loyalty could be directed towards a higher aim than merely countering border scuffles. He had always thought that no single cause or person could ever command the loyalty of him that his own House and lands did, not even the ruler of the Seven Kingdoms, though he was proud to pledge his sword to Rhaenyra, the true Queen's cause. He soon came to realise that the lady before him was this higher aim, the guiding star in his life and the object of all his future hopes. She might not ever be a Queen in name, but he would readily admit to anyone who asked that she was the queen of his heart and where his true loyalty lay.

Usually so confident, Benjicot found himself tensing his shoulders and fixing his gaze upon the ground, rather than her lovely eyes as he awaited her response to his question. He looked up suddenly in shock, first to the small hand placed upon his forearm and then to the crystalline eyes that had haunted his dreams so much of late. "I am not afraid of you, Benji. You have always been so kind to me. You are...my best friend" she added, with a nervous smile, before quickly looking away from him.  Warm affection surged in his chest at hearing her confirm that she was not only not afraid of him, as he had feared, but also even considered him more gentlemanly than her suitors on the Bracken side. Lowering his head to chase her eyes, despite her adorable attempts to evade them. He couldn't help finding her perennial shyness endearing. When she finally met his gaze, he gently lifted her hand to his lips and placed a reverent kiss upon her knuckles, which only made her blush harder. "You are my best friend too, my Lady, and if your, no doubt, endless train of suitors are causing you distress, I am sure your loyal friend can think of a way of 'removing them'.

Benji grinned, pleased with himself, as a laugh bubbled forth from her and she lightly pushed his shoulder in remonstrance. "Don't be silly, Benji. I appreciate your concern, but there's nothing you can do without crossing the border into Brackenlands. That would be far too dangerous". Benji murmured under his breath, "for them." "What was that, I didn't quite catch it," Y/N looked up inquisitively at him. "Nothing, nothing, my Lady, you just have a twig in your hair. Do I have your permission to remove it?" Embarrassed at having had a twig in her hair for gods only know how long, she quickly assented, "Oh, yes of course." With her agreement, Benji wasted no time in brushing his knuckle softly against her temple and through her hair, before tucking a stray lock behind her ear. "All gone now," he assured her, though there had never really been a twig in her hair to begin with. He smiled mischievously at her, for what reason she could not tell, but she did so like to see him smile, especially at her, because of something she had said.

Smiling brightly back at him, she quickly waved away her concern that he might incur danger to himself in order to rid her of her irritating suitors. Why would he go to so much trouble on her account, even if they were friends? Returning her gaze to her book, the pair happily passed the time in comfortable silence, Benjicott content merely to be in the presence of the one he loved, and she absorbed in her book. When enough time had elapsed, Benji thought, for his next question to be posed without incurring too much suspicion from his lady as to the motivations behind it, Benji tentatively spoke his next query. "My Lady, would you be able to....perhaps, describe these suitors or...tell me their names?" Avoiding her eyes, sure she would be able to see the dark thoughts lingering behind them, Benji directed his gaze off into the far distance as he awaited her reply. A quiet, yet direct response of 'why?' had him struggling to repress a smile at the air of ingenuousness behind it. As expected, she did not as of yet hold any suspicions as to his reasoning; she was genuinely incredulous as to the reason. His brows furrowed the next moment, however, as he realised that her lack of suspicion also spoke to her disbelief that anyone would care enough to intercede on her behalf over something that had upset or concerned her.

A wave of sadness passed over him then, but he quickly rallied himself, a look of steely determination in his eyes. He would convince her, no matter how many years it took, that she was worth more than anyone had ever lead her to belief. That she was worthy of being cared for. That she meant more than anything to him. Gods, he worshipped the ground she tread on and he'd be damned before he let any suitors bother his love for even a second more. Still assuming an air of nonchalance and directing his shifty expression elsewhere, Benjicott responded to his lady's query. "No reason in particular, just to build a better mental picture for myself of these bastar....weasels," he quickly corrected himself. "Oh, of course." She responded, in her sweet, direct way of hers, as if she should have expected us much. She then proceeded to describe the four offenders with a degree of detail he was grateful for, only interjecting a few times to ask for more particulars.

By the time she had finished describing them, Benjicott had a clear enough idea of the "weasels" in question who he needed to despatch...have a stern talking to, he corrected himself mentally, once again. Only one of his lady's suitors had caused enough offense to merit more than that, the others were mere weak-spirited vassals of House Bracken that needed to be removed from his Love's presence. That shouldn't be too difficult. He'd seen all of them before and knew when he could expect to come across them near the borders to the Blackwood lands. The other one, however, would need more than a stern talking to. The craven bastard had dared to touch his lady, grabbing her wrist to prevent her from leaving the room to avoid hearing his pathetic attempts to win her heart. Benji's eyes had darkened at his lady's admission of this, his fists once again curling into tight balls at his side. His voice came out harsher than he'd intended, as he realised he'd been gritting his teeth in his anger at the suitor who had dared to frighten his lady by imposing his unwanted attentions on her. "He should never have touched you or enforced his unwanted solicitations upon your presence.

He would not have gotten so far if I had been in the room, my Lady." Y/N met his gaze with another quizzical look, searching his eyes for something, he could not tell what. He found himself wishing, hoping even, that she might find the love he held for her therein and not be offended by it. That she might even return it. But no, she only looked away from him again and spoke in a quiet tone. "You have always been such a gentleman, Benji. Not all men are so. I wish you could be there with me when I have to deal with these suitors. I never know what to say to them. I always end up offending them merely by being myself." Her eyebrows furrowed at this into a look of concentration, seemingly trying to uncover the reason why she had caused offense. Benjicott found her look of confusion adorable, much as he did everything else about her, especially her directness, which so seemed to offend the spineless scoundrels who vied for her hand. The hand he would so cherish if she were to grant him her love.

"It is their fault if they are offended, not yours. You should always speak your mind, my Lady. It is not for you to pander to weak men such as they are. Have you spoken to anyone of the rude manner in which these suitors have addressed you?" Y/N smiled sadly up at Benjicott before replying. My Lord Uncle cares little for anything involving myself and I would not want to be a burden. "You never could be" Benjicott interjected abruptly before he could stop himself. Another quizzical look from her, before she lightly patted his shoulder. "Thank you Benji, you are very kind." "No I am not, my Lady. Or at least, I say what I say not out of mere kindness, but because I genuinely, ardently mean what I say. You are and never could be a burden...not to me." He said the last part so quietly he was not sure if she would hear him. The light blush on her cheeks was the only intimation that she had heard him and might have been touched by what he had meant as a subtle confession of his true feelings for her, but she quickly looked away before he could completely embarrass himself by falling to his knees in front of her and begging her to grant him her hand in marriage.

 "My uncle does not share your view. My cousin, Aeron, is very kind to be and cares for me. I'm sure he would intervene if I were to tell him of Ser Percival's unwanted attentions but I hesitate to do so after the last time I mentioned a suitor was bothering me." Benjicot's interest was immediately piqued at this unexpected revelation. "Oh? What happened the last time you did so, my Lady?"

"Aeron wouldn't tell me exactly, he's very assiduous about not involving me in anything unpleasant, but Ser Benjen did not renew his suit afterwards and I later caught a glimpse of something that looked suspiciously like a purple bruise under his eye. Aeron wouldn't admit that he was the culprit, but he grew very edgy when I mentioned it to him and started stuttering out possible scenarios which were so outlandish that I know it was him. Ser Benjen is an oaf, but not so much so that he could, as Aeron suggested, have 'tripped over a bucket and fallen down the stairs or been hit in the face by a raven.' Aeron's never been a very good liar, gods bless him. Not to mention that he'd already asked me if Ser Benjen had bothered me again, no doubt in full knowledge the poor man had been too afraid to, with Aeron glaring at him every time he was even in the same room as me'. Y/N shook her head and smiled indulgently at the thought of her kind cousin's well-meaning antics.

Benjicot found himself smiling in spite of himself. He had to hand it to Aeron Bracken, he was as loyal to his House and family as he was to his own. That factor alone had earned him enough respect from Benjicot to ensure their frequent border scuffles always involved an element of almost brotherly playfulness that never resulted in full out warfare. But it was his kindness and care for his cousin, the lady Benjicot loved, which had him thinking he could have befriended Aeron under different circumstances. Not to mention he'd done Benjicot the immense favour of already removing one suitor from the equation. One down, three to go, Benjicot mentally made a tally for himself.

"Right, one down, three more Bracken scoundrels to go. No problem, you've come to the right man. I can arrange for them to mysteriously and, quite coincidentally, of course, disappear". Rob echoed the tally Benji had mentally made for himself but a few hours ago, waggling his eyebrows suggestively and making a motion with his hand as if he were physically wiping the suitors away. Benjicot sighed in frustration with his loyal and well-meaning friend. "How many times do I have to tell you, Rob. I won't allow you to murder Brackens and cause a war, just because you hate them." Rob's mischievous expression quickly turned sullen. "Fine," he sulkily replied, "have it your way. How do you plan on 'removing' these drivelling knaves from your lady's presence?”

 Benji turned fully to his friend, having advanced a few paces ahead of him on their way back to Raventree. "I intend to have a polite discussion with the first two and a not so polite discussion with the third one who dared to lay a hand on her." Benjicot glowered at Rob as he broke into laughter, holding his torso in response to what he had meant to be taken in utter seriousness. "Enjoying yourself, Rob?" Still struggling to quiet his laughter, brushing away stray tears that had streamed from his eyes, Rob sought to make amends. "I apologise my friend, but I think I know enough of your character to know exactly what you mean by a 'polite discussion' and it involves at least three broken noses and several black eyes." "Not necessarily!" Benjicott peevishly replied, though he could not entirely refute Rob's accusation. It all depended on how amenable these pipsqueaks were to his 'polite' request that they kindly full off and leave his girl alone...or else.

His dark thoughts were interrupted, once again, by Rob breaking into another round of laughter. "There it is, I can see you scheming their deaths right now. I'll marry a Bracken tomorrow if you manage to have a 'polite discussion' with these suitors that doesn't involve them encountering some violence from your end of some kind or another." Benjicot did not honour Rob's sallies with any response, merely glowering at him and turning petulantly to stalk off in the direction of Raventree. He'd show Rob that he could a conversation with these suitors, telling them to never impose themselves upon his lady again or face the consequences, without actually putting those consequences into action...he hoped.

"Right, one down, three more Bracken scoundrels to go. No problem, you've come to the right man. I can arrange for them to mysteriously and, quite coincidentally, of course, disappear". Rob echoed the tally Benji had mentally made for himself but a few hours ago, waggling his eyebrows suggestively and making a motion with his hand as if he were physically wiping the suitors away. Benjicott sighed in frustration with his loyal and well-meaning friend. "How many times do I have to tell you, Rob. I won't allow you to murder Brackens and cause a war, just because you hate them." Rob's mischievous expression quickly turned sullen. "Fine," he sulkily replied, "have it your way. How do you plan on 'removing' these drivelling knaves from your lady's presence?”

 Benji turned fully to his friend, having advanced a few paces ahead of him on their way back to Raventree. "I intend to have a polite discussion with the first two and a not so polite discussion with the third one who dared to lay a hand on her." Benjicott glowered at Rob as he broke into laughter, holding his torso in response to what he had meant to be taken in utter seriousness. "Enjoying yourself, Rob?" Still struggling to quiet his laughter, brushing away stray tears that had streamed from his eyes, Rob sought to make amends. "I apologise my friend, but I think I know enough of your character to know exactly what you mean by a 'polite discussion' and it involves at least three broken noses and several black eyes." "Not necessarily!" Benjicott peevishly replied, though he could not entirely refute Rob's accusation. It all depended on how amenable these pipsqueaks were to his 'polite' request that they kindly full off and leave his girl alone...or else.

His dark thoughts were interrupted, once again, by Rob breaking into another round of laughter. "There it is, I can see you scheming their deaths right now. I'll marry a Bracken tomorrow if you manage to have a 'polite discussion' with these suitors that doesn't involve them encountering some violence from your end of some kind or another." Benjicot did not honour Rob's sallies with any response, merely glowering at him and turning petulantly to stalk off in the direction of Raventree. He'd show Rob that he could a conversation with these suitors, telling them to never impose themselves upon his lady again or face the consequences, without actually putting those consequences into action...he hoped.

 "Well well, the conciliator returns, no doubt from his successful diplomatic negotiations with the unlucky fellows who dared to bother his sweet lady. Oh but look, lads," Rob called jubilantly from his jaunty position on a fence to Kermit and Oscar beside him, all with smirks on their faces, "is that blood on your collar, good envoy?" "Oh fuck off, Rob, this one deserved it and I barely touched him. He ran off with his tail between his legs." Rob looked at his nails, returning smugly. "So you said the last two times. Did they all deserve it too?" "Yes!" Benjicott spat out quickly, without hesitation. "This was especially." His eyes darkened at the memory of his encounter with the craven bastard who had presumed to touch his lady and frighten her with his unwanted solicitations. He'd found the swine patrolling the border on his own, in his arrogance. Well, this would go a lot quicker than if Benjicott had to deal with a host if Brackens.

"Oi, dastard, I have some business with you," Benjicott shouted across to the Knight, swaggering casually up to the border. "You dare address me in such a manner, Blackwood swine!" The Knight spat out. "Who are you to accuse me of cowardice?" Benjicot advanced so that he was chest to chest with the Bracken Knight, his steely response coming out through gritted teeth. "Oh I dare. Any man that presumes to touch a lady without her permission and insult her with his unwanted presence deserves the name of coward." The Knight looked shifty and considerably chastened by Benjicot’s close proximity and the sheer aggression radiating off him. Seeing the Blackwood sigil on the broach fastening Benjicot’s cloak round his shoulders, the Knight gulped at the realisation that it was the formidable future Lord of Raventree bearing down upon him.

"I don't...don't understand your meaning, Ser." He stuttered out, attempting to take a step back, before Benji grabbed him by his cloak, preventing his retreat. "Did you, or did you not lay a hand on Lady Y/N Bracken when she tried to kindly reject your pathetic suit for her hand?" The scoundrel had the audacity to laugh then, making Benjicot's blood boil. "Is that what this is about? Why should you care, Ser? Is she some great friend of yours." He quickly stopped laughing when Benjicot's grip on his collar tightened painfully so as to nearly lift him off the ground. The knight shivered in fear as he saw Benjicot's eyes darken and heard his next words, spoken in a low, dangerous tone. "She means more to me than a spineless lickspittle like yourself could ever comprehend and if I ever head of you approaching or even looking at her again, I will have no hesitation in paying you another visit. I assure you that I will not be so reasonable, in that case."

"I didn't even kiss her, she wouldn’t let me, the minx. She didn't need to go crying about it. I said as much to her at the time. She's just too sensitive, I assure you Ser." Benjicot saw red at the knight's revelation. Of course his lady wouldn't tell him the whole truth. She never wanted to burden anyone with anything that troubled her, not even when someone offered her physical insult. If he had known that this scoundrel had not only attempted to kiss his darling lady without her consent, but also made her cry in the attempt, there would have been not attempt at a 'discussion' with him, 'polite' or otherwise. What followed was not pretty and Benjicott was sure Rob would laugh at him relentlessly for giving into his anger. He was also sure that his friend would agree that this one really did 'deserve it'. Besides, he hadn't hurt him too badly, just enough to be sure that he'd never approach either his, or any other lady with his unwanted attentions again. Drawing his mind back to the present, Benjicott was irritated to see that Rob, the smug git, was still smirking knowingly at him whilst Kermit and Oscar continued to laugh at his lovesick behaviour. No matter, he didn't care what they thought. He only cared what she thought. He couldn't seem to care for much else at this point, his whole thoughts consumed by his lovely lady. Even now a dreamy look transformed his features, which had shown his irritation only a moment before.

"What exactly is your plan here, Benjicot? I hate to break it to you, my good man, but as soon as you despatch one suitor another shall surely raise his ugly head. You can't prevent every suitor from seeking out your fair lady's hand. She will marry some lucky fellow one day." Rob held his hands up placatingly, seeing the danger in his friend's darkening eyes, but he could not help himself from expressing what to him was an unavoidable obstacle to Benjicot's suit for the fair Bracken lady's hand. "I only mean to point out, dear fellow, that removing these suitors now will not help you in the long run. You can't really believe that she would marry a Blackwood, let alone the heir of Raventree." "I'm counting on it." Benjicot spoke through gritted teeth, a look of fierce determination on his face. "She's my girl, in my heart, even if she won't have me in that way. She will be my wife if I have my way and even if she won't, I'll get rid of any problem that bothers her and that I have the power of removing. Whatever it is, I will attend to it. And if anyone hurts her," his voice became cold and low, "I'll kill them. Whenever she needs someone to rely upon, I will be there. Is that clear, Rob?"

Rob smiled softly at his friend then, before shooting a warning look at his two partners in crime, who were barely holding back their sniggers, unused to seeing the usually fearsome Bloody Benjicott act in such a manner. He understood now, where he had doubted before, that his friend was not merely infatuated, but deeply in love with this lady. He couldn't fault him for that, though he questioned the wiseness of his choice. The enmity between the Blackwood and Bracken Houses was no easy thing to surmount, and his friend had a hard road ahead of him if he were to win the love and hand of the lady he had chosen. "Crystal clear, my good man." If his friend was really serious about gaining the love of the mysterious Bracken lady, he would help him if he could.

A day later, Benjicot found himself waiting for his lady underneath their Brackentree, more anxious than usual to see her and convince himself she was well. He could not erase the image of her distress at that brute's behaviour from his mind. A deep sense of sadness and anger on her behalf left him with a painful feeling in the pit of his stomach that she considered herself so little she would not even tell anyone that she had been insulted in such a manner. That she wouldn't tell him. He wanted so desperately for her to see him as someone she could confide in and trust to fight on her behalf for her interests. Just as he was pondering how he could possibly gain her trust in this capacity, the very lady he was thinking of emerged from the tree line into view, a book in hand, as usual.

His face immediately broke into a smile reserved just for her, her presence alone acting like a wave of calm quieting his anxious thoughts. He was delighted to see her return his smile with a gentle smile of her own, even if she shyly cast her gaze elsewhere as he continued to gaze at her. He continued to find this perennial shyness an endearing trait of hers, hoping that it might have more to do with his effect on her than any reservations around him. He was surprised when she tripped lightly up to the tree he resided under and slid down to sit beside him, a smile still on her face. Normally she would seem hesitant to take a seat by his side until he had first stood up to greet her and invite her to. He always hoped that she would grow more familiar and comfortable around him and was elated to see her already seeming to be so.

"Good morrow, my Lady. What has you looking so pleased this day?" To his further surprise, she turned to meet his gaze fully, where she usually avoided direct eye contact, gushing out, "Oh Benji, you will never guess what has happened. It's the most wonderful thing. All of the horrid suitors I was telling you off have stopped their pursuit without me having to do anything. I have never had so much time to read!" "Oh?" Benjicot responded in a wry tone, a single eyebrow raised. "I cannot account for it. Of course my uncle is less than pleased, but he cares too little about me to take too much of an interest. Perhaps my awkward manner frightened them off or someone prettier has taken their interest. Whatever it is, I am most glad of it." She sighed in relief. Benjicot frowned at her last statement. Though he was pleased that she was relieved to be rid of these troublesome suitors, he was anxious to impress upon her that their sudden absence was due to no fault of her own. "I assure you, my Lady, that neither of your suggestions for your suitors' sudden departure are in the least likely, for your manner is positively charming and," he tentatively placed his hand on hers, as he gazed into her eyes, "you are the fairest lady that ever lived."

Unsurprisingly, though much to his dismay, she frowned at his compliment, as she always did and looked almost disappointed in him, before shrinking into herself and retracting her hand. "I wish you wouldn't say jest with me like that Benji, it's not very kind." He immediately snatched her hand back as she retracted it and chased her eyes with his own. "Don't do that, Y/N. Don't hide from me and lock yourself inside your mind. I can see you doing it." She met his gaze at this, looking startled, as if she didn't think he would notice her protective mechanism. He noticed everything about her. He just wished that he would be where she would look to for reassurance and comfort, rather than withdrawing from him. "I need you to understand that I would never jest about what I believe to be absolutely true. To me you are the loveliest, most charming girl, not least because you are so outwardly fair. But it is the beauty of your mind and person that makes me sure you are the fairest lady in the Riverlands." He did not add, Westeros, fearing she may think he was being too grandiose in making such a claim, though he was confident that he was not.

To his relief, she had not run away, as he had half expected her too, already kneeling next to her in case he needed to head tail it after her and make her belief him. He couldn't risk losing her forever if he allowed her to run off this once. Not when it was so important that she finally understood how highly he thought of her, to say nothing of loving her. He didn't think it was safe to risk revealing that when she was already put out with him at a compliment. Better to be safe than sorry and lose his girl because he was too impatient to gush out his love for her and wrap her in his arms. Instead he gently held her chin in his hand, holding her gaze as he invested his voice with a firmness he never usually directed at her. "Please believe me when I say that I have never and will never deceive you. I always mean exactly what I say when I tell you how lovely you are. How much I value your voice. How any measure of time spent with you could never be enough for me." Her head titled quizzically in that adorable way it always did when she was testing the truth of what he said before she offered him a small smile, much to his relief. "Thank you Benji, you are very kind. I'm glad you should think me such a friend and that you enjoy my company...I think the same of you." She added before he finally allowed her to withdraw her head from his hand and look away. He could help the smug smile that made its way onto his features at this, though he wished she would see him as more than a friend.

"No one has ever much cared for what I have had to say. It certainly makes a nice change." She smiled up at him once again. Benjicot gazed down lovingly at her, his eyes aglow with adoration for her, which she, alas, could not see, though it was there plainly for any other observer to see. "You have the most beautiful voice I have ever heard. It is to others' detriment if they have failed to hear it. Though it is quiet, little mouse," he lightly stroked her cheek, smiling indulgently at her, "I would hear it above a throng of voices." She seemed genuinely taken aback by this, a light blush gracing her features, and he could only hope that the truth of his words had resonated for her.

Not wishing to flustered her too much, he directed his gaze elsewhere. A hard task for him, since he could very happily gaze at her pretty features until the end of his days. He would make this sacrifice to her shyness, however. "In the matter of your disappearing suitors, I suspect a bigger game is at play. Perhaps a more worthy suitor has sought fit to see them off from bothering his fair lady with their suits." He smiled slyly at her from the corner of his eye, trying to silently convey that he was said suitor. "Don't be silly, Benji. What a ridiculous suggestion." She narrowed her eyes at him as he broke out into laughter at her directness. She grabbed his elbow then. "What's so funny Benji!" "Nothing, my Lady. Only I think in this, I may be proven correct, and you may be mistaken. It is an unlikely turn of events, of course, since you are clearly the intellectual in this pair." "You are clearly wrong. I think I would realise if such were the case." She did not hear as Benjicot muttered under his breath, "if only you would."

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Snow Drop: Part 10

Description: Jacaerys is a man on a mission, determined to care for his lady when she falls ill, despite her attempts to evade him. In his attempts to care for his ailing lady, he finds himself falling for her all over again, in more ways than one. Featuring Jacaerys' poor kitchen skills and foolhardy, but well-meaning, antics.

Dividers by @zaldritzosrose

Warnings: Female reader, mentions of past sexual assault and trauma.

Y/N had returned to her room that night, Jacaerys insisting on walking her the short distance from the kitchen to her room, feeling as if a weight had been lifted from her chest. Her love and trust in Jacaerys had not erased her trauma from her past experience with men or her fear that Jacaerys might blame her for what had transpired with the other man she had loved. She felt not only relief but also a sense of safety she had never experienced at his loving response and assurances that he would protect her heart and self from the perils of this world.

Her difficulty believing that a Prince like Jacaerys could truly love her and her fear that he might suddenly change in his manner to her had been the last obstacle holding her back from agreeing to announce their engagement publicly. His response to her revelation of her past experiences with men had convinced her more fully than ever of the purity of his intentions towards her and had cemented her trust in him. She would no longer allow herself to doubt him again.

Jacaerys placed a soft, lingering kiss on her hand, wishing her sweet dreams, although he continued to gaze lovingly into Y/N's eyes, a hazy expression on his face. After a moment had passed with him still looking at her as if she were the most wondrous phenomenon he had ever seen, which she was to him, Y/N could not help but laugh. At the bell-like sound of his love's laughter, Jacaerys shook his head and forced himself to pull himself together. At the teasing tone of his love's next words, he realised he must have looked like a gaping fool, having become lost in her beauty.

"Should not you be leaving, my Prince? Or has something caught your eye?"

Smirking at her teasing, he decided that she would have to learn the penalty for daring to tease a Prince of the realm. Taking a step closer to her, he watched in amusement as she looked quizzically up at him, before taking a step back toward her door. He followed her steps so that they were pressed chest to chest. Pressing her hands against his chest and looking frantically from side to side, her words came out frantic. "Someone will see, Jacaerys."

He took the opportunity of her turning her head to check for any witnesses to kiss her jaw, whispering against it, "what care I? They will only see their Prince kissing his Princess." At the sound of her sigh he continued to place soft kisses along her jaw, before beginning to make his way down her neck, causing her to shudder. He smiled against her neck, satisfied with having paid his lady back for laughing at his adoration for her.

Pulling away from her reluctantly to see the pretty dusting of pink on her cheeks, he playfully chucked her chin between his forefinger and thumb before kissing the tip of her nose. He did not wish to push her further than she was comfortable, especially after what she had told him that evening. "I really will depart now before I become lost in gazing at your beauty again, my love."

He delighted as She playfully swatted his shoulder, her eyes glittering with suppressed laughter as she whispered, 'be gone with you, you rogue." Assuming an expression of mock despair, Jacaerys sighed dramatically. "Alas, I am always to be thought a scoundrel by my lady." Y/N giggled at his antics before she grabbed him by the forearms and he allowed her to turn him away from her and in the direction of the hallway he needed to take. "Off with you now or you shall have no more kisses." At this he whipped his head around with a petulant look on his face that only made her laugh harder. But Y/N quickly realised that she had not gotten the upper hand over Jacaerys as she turned back to open the door to her room and felt him peck her on the cheek. Whipping her head around, she saw him grin boyishly at her before turning to run down the hall before she could. As she watched his red cape disappear around the corner, she absentmindly pressed her hand to the place on her cheek he had kissed.

Y/N looked bashfully at the matron after she had emitted the fifth cough in the last ten minutes, earning her a withering look of disapproval. The damp and chill of the ancient halls of Dragonstone had done nothing for a constitution already weakened by years of little sustenance and much hard work. Jacaerys had said as much when he'd noticed his lady had developed a small cough a few days past. Y/N had promptly dismissed his worries, not used to having someone care for her wellbeing so attentively since her late mother passed. She found her heart stuttering at Jacaerys' gentle kindness towards her, intermittently pressing his palm to her forehead or the pulse point on her wrist, his eyebrows furrowing in concern her rebuffs did nothing to appease. Nevertheless, she did not wish to be a burden, especially when Jacaerys had much more important matters of state to attend to.

Things had carried on in this manner for a few days, with Y/N finding it increasingly difficult to conceal her worsening symptoms. What she had believed to be a minor cough, hardly worth worrying about, had developed into a searing headache and tremors, which left her feeling as if she were on fire everywhere. As she made her way blearily to the last room she had to clean that day, she found herself stumbling at points as she fought the blinding pain and heat in her head. Making her way to the window, she raised her shaking arms to raise it and air the room. She huffed in frustration as she struggled to move the pane even an inch, her trembling limbs, weakened by fever, preventing her from doing so. She continued to struggle until a gentle hand took hold of her elbow and moved her aside.

Recognizing the gentle touch to be that of Jacaerys before she turned to him, she stood aside. Jacaerys immediately moved passed her to lift the pane up for her in one swift movement, before turning back to her, his warm brown eyes filled with concern, and his lips pulled into a tight frown.

Breathless from her efforts, despite their ineffectuality, Y/N breathed out a thank you to Jacaerys, barely able to manage what she hoped was a reassuring smile. She knew she had failed to allay his fears for her health when he quickly stepped towards her, pressing the back of his hand against her forehead. His eyebrows knit together in panic as he felt her frantic pulse against his hand, which he had encircled around his lady's delicate wrist once he had felt the heat of her forehead. "You're burning up," he said, his voice laced with concern. Y/N quickly withdrew her wrist from Jacaerys' grasp and moved a pace away from him, causing his eyebrows to draw together in confusion. Attempting a laugh, which came out weaker than she intended, she attempted to push aside his concerns. "It is only from performing my duties, I assure you I am quite well."

Shaking his head at her, a look of determination etched itself onto Jacaerys' features as he promptly stepped forward and gently, but firmly, took hold of both her elbows in his hands. "You can no longer push aside my concern for you. You are unwell and you cannot convince me otherwise. Why do you continue to pretend to be well and continue to avoid me? I am convinced it is to prevent me from enquiring into your wellbeing and I cannot account for your behaviour."

Jacaerys had grown increasingly concerned about the state of his lady's health over the last few days, despite her frequent entreaties for him not to worry himself over her. At his persistent enquiries and, he thought, sly checks of her pulse when he would hold her hand, Y/N had finally resolved to avoid him altogether, until she was well again. This had proven more difficult than expected, as Jacaerys had easily ascertained that this was the case, following her last successful avoidance of him when she had changed the schedule of her duties. This time he was more prepared and it was only two days before he had discovered her changed routine and had come across her struggling to raise the window. Under normal circumstances, he would have been only too delighted to gallantly open the window for her and tease her over it, in the hopes of inciting her pretty blush.

The sight of her trembling arms and the fevered flush on her features were cause for alarm, however, and he quickly strode forward to assist his lady. His concerned frustration at her blatant lack of concern for her own health, when it was the utmost priority for him, and her avoidance of him had entered his voice as he questioned her but he quickly relented when he saw her continue to shiver under his gaze. Sighing, he swiftly removed his cloak from his shoulders and wrapped it around his lady's, pulling it securely around her, before embracing her and holding her head against his chest.

"I do not mean to be severe, my dove, but you must concede that I have cause for concern."

Meeting his gaze for the first time, when she had been steadfastly attempting to avoid it, she relented at the tender concern she saw behind Jacaerys' eyes. With a shuddering breath, she spoke in a quiet, hoarse voice. "Alright, alright, I admit I haven't been well. And I may have been avoiding you a little," she added, bashfully. Jacaerys closed his eyes for a brief moment, a look of hurt passing over his features before he quickly schooled them. "Will you tell me why?" he asked, his voice tentative, as if afraid of the answer but determined to get to the bottom of her avoidance of him anyway.

Wringing her hands nervously, she spoke her next words in a quiet, meek tone. "I didn't want to bother you. It is only a minor thing and you have far more serious concerns to attend to. I do not wish to be a burden."

Jacaerys' heart stopped at this. He hadn't been expecting this answer, having never even considered that his love would consider herself a burden to him. He resolved that he would have to assure her that she could never be so to him. He only wished that she would allow him to care for her. Sighing, he pulled her closer to him, rubbing his hand up and down her back to comfort her. "Oh my dove, you could never be a burden to me. I had much rather you allowed me to take care of you. I urge you to believe that you are precious to me beyond all else and that your wellbeing will always be my highest priority."

He had to lean down closer to her head to hear her response, which was muffled as she leant her head against his chest. "I have never had anyone, not since my mother, to care much about whether I was well or not, and I am not used to it." Jacaerys tightened his hold of her and stroked her hair tenderly before responding in a hushed tone, "you have someone now. I will always care for you." Pulling back a little to smirk at her, he added in a teasing tone, "that is, if you will let me. I am, at least, getting to know your evasive ways by now," he added, playfully pinching her cheek before brushing his knuckle lovingly against it. His smile only widened in response to his lady's pretty blush and bashful attempt to direct her gaze away from him.

"Uh uh," he tutted, "you shan't escape me so easily, my dove. You shall be cared for, whether you will it or not." He pulled his cloak more securely around her, a soft smile gracing his features at the thought of how it looked much better on her. "I insist that you return to your chambers to rest until you are well again. I shall escort you there myself." He chuckled as he saw her pretty mouth part and her eyes widen, anticipating her refusal. He titled his head downward so that his lips brushed her jaw, just by her ear. "Either you will allow your Prince to walk you back to your chambers willingly, or I will have no further qualms about carrying you there myself. Your choice, my love."

He inwardly revelled in her sharp intake of breath as he pecked her jaw before pulling away. He knew she had a particular penchant for him kissing her there, and he was always pleased to give her pleasure. He could not deny that his own confidence was buoyed up by this assurance that he affected her as much as she did him. However, he furrowed his brows together now in an attempt to show her that he was serious and would take no further refusal, though it was hard to be firm with her doe eyes looking up at him like that. In normal circumstances, he would deny her nothing, but he would take a fim stance when it came to his lady's health, especially now he knew she was so heedless of it herself. "Don't be silly, Jacaerys. The rooms won't clean themselves, and I have many left to do. I can't just abandon my duties over such a trifle."

With what Jacaerys thought an adorable humph and nod of her head, which signalled her confidence that she had won this round, she attempted to move around him further into the room. Jacaerys struggled to repress a smile at her antics, especially since she had unknowingly done exactly what he had not only expected but also hoped she would do, since it allowed him to do what he did next. With an exaggerated sigh, Jacaerys shook his head and spoke his next words in a tone of mock contrition, though he was secretly very pleased with the opportunity she had given him. "Alas, I did not want to have to do this, but you give me no choice, my dove."

Y/N turned back to him, her head tilting in confusion before a look of mild alarm alit on her features as she seemed to realise what he meant. Too late. She emitted a small squeak when Jacaerys wrapped an arm securely around her shoulders before reaching down to sweep her up by the backs of her knees in one elegant motion. Wrapping her arms around his neck in shock, Y/N turned her head to face Jacaerys with a withering look. He only laughed at her expression before winking and striding confidently in the direction of her chambers. Y/N mentally conceded that she had lost this round but, wrapped securely in the arms of her Prince, who cared so assiduously for her, she could not find it in herself to be sorry.

Jacaerys smiled in contentment, looking down in wonder when he felt his Princess place her head on his shoulder. He wished he could always have her this close, feeling her breath fan his throat and her delicate arms wrapped around his neck, a sign of the trust she placed in him. His concern for her wellbeing was the only thing tainting his happiness in this moment, but he was pleased that his love finally seemed to be relenting on that point. He hoped that the way she was tucking her head into his shoulder now meant that she would allow him to care for her.

He also took note of the fact that her contentment in his arms, when someone could easily come across them and ask questions about the nature of their relationship, meant that she was also beginning to feel that she could announce their engagement. He hoped that day would come soon. He wished to remove any burdens from his love and for her to take her place at his side. He would not pressure her, however. She had been given so little choice over her future in the past, and he would not add to those constraints. In this moment, he was content merely to hold his love in his arms.

Despite her seeming comfort in his arms, even at the risk of being seen by prying eyes, Jacaerys had taken a lesser known passageway back to his lady's chambers. He did not wish to give her cause for alarm if someone should see them together and it should call for explanations which she was too ill to concern herself with for the moment. Gently setting her down by her door, though he immediately regretted the loss of her from his arms, he caressed her cheek before brushing a lock of hair behind her ear.

He attempted to school his features into a serious expression, adopting a sterner voice than he was used to assuming with his love. "I want you to rest until you are better, my darling. If you step outside your room to go about your chores I assure you now that I will hear of it and will have no hesitation in coming down here to enforce my orders. I hope I have made myself clear." He raised his eyebrow, his eyes boring into hers as he said this.

He was surprised when his attempt at using his gravity as a Prince to enforce his care for his lady's wellbeing only elicited a laugh from her. His look of confusion only made her laugh harder until she was suddenly beset by coughs, and Jacaerys' eyes widened in alarm. He promptly closed the space between them, rubbing her back up and down as he untreated her to take long, slow breaths.

When she recovered from her coughing fit, she placed her head on his shoulder, allowing him to enwrap her in an embrace. Placing his head lightly on hers, he continued to rub small circles on her back when she moved her head to rest against his chest. "You begin to really alarm me, my dove. I apologise if my tone before was too strong, but I only wish for you to allow me to care for you."

"I don't mind it, Jacaerys. In fact, I rather like it when you scold me like that, it shows you care. It's nice to be cared for." Jacaerys' heart soared at his lady's uncharacteristic declaration. He delighted to know that she welcomed his earnest care for her. It was all that he wanted: for her to want him, to need him as he did her and to look to him as a source of comfort and protection. He attempted to conceal the self-complacent smirk that lit upon in his features at her admission, burying his head in her neck. "Don't get too smug now, my Prince. I can feel you smiling." Chuckling at this, Jacaerys nevertheless straightened to meet her gaze with a serious expression that he hoped conveyed the truth of his next words.

"Of course I care. I care for you above all else. I care about you morning, noon and night. You are most precious to me." Y/n smiled softly at this and grazed her knuckles against Jacaerys' cheek, whose hand came flying up to hold her hand in place. "I will rest tomorrow but I can't be expected to lounge about all day, neglecting my duties. I am no courtly lady." Jacaerys huffed petulantly at this. "Only because you steadfastly thwart my attempts to make you so by marrying me. One would think I were urging you down the aisle at the point of a sword."

At Y/N's sweet laughter, Jacaerys relented from his frustration a little. It was so difficult to be even remotely irritated by one so sweet and lovely. "I assure you I will go willingly one day. Just give me time." Jacaerys bowed his head and nodded in deference to her wish, desiring her to know that he would not pressure her if she was not yet ready. "I would kiss you now if I could, if not for fear of making you unwell too." Jacaerys' head quickly snapped up, his eyes alight with eagerness. "I care not for the risk, my love." Jacaerys lowered his head to meet her lips, and huffed in displeasure when Y/N only lightly tipped his head to the side with a laugh. "Well, lucky for you, I do care if I make the Prince of the Realm unwell, so there shall be no kiss for you until I am better."

Jacaerys assumed a sulky expression Y/N was sure he wasn't aware of, and she had to fight to repress further laughter, fearing she may really start to impact on his ego if she laughed at him again. With one last brush of her hand against his cheek, Y/N turned into her chambers for the night, softly closing the door behind her. Jacaerys stood outside her room a moment longer, holding his hand to his cheek where she had touched it, just as she had done when he had kissed her cheek a few days ago.

Jacaerys drummed his fingers along the table in the Council Room, struggling to restrain himself from his desire to go down to the servants' quarters to check on his love throughout the day. His thoughts constantly turned on if she was resting, if she was feeling better or, he feared, worse, if she needed anything, if she wanted him. Whilst his duty to his mother and the war effort prevented him from storming down to check for himself, as he wished to do, he sent various members of the Queen's staff to check on her wellbeing and report on it to him throughout the day.

He was relieved to hear that she had remained in her room to rest instead of going about her duties, as he feared she would attempt to do, though he wished that he could be with her to tend to her himself. He did not care for the thought of her being unwell and alone with no one to care for her, and the realisation that she had been up until this point saddened him. Though he could not undo the past, he would make sure that she was never left alone and uncared for again. He saw it as not only his duty, but his privilege to care for his lady and it was with this in mind that he strode purposefully down to the servants' quarters, later that evening, after finishing his duties for the day.

The hour was late, past the royal household and servant's dinner hour, evidenced by the guttering candles lining the wall and the absence of another soul in the kitchens. Sighing with relief to find himself alone, as he had hoped, Jacaerys began pulling out the supplies he had seen his lady use to make the hot beverage she liked so much, and which he had carefully watched her prepare for him several times now. He carefully went through the steps of heating the milk and mixing the chocolate powder, although he had forgotten the exact ratios.

He continued to stir the mixture, hoping that he had remembered the process correctly, before tipping the steaming milk into a teacup, which he placed on a tray, alongside a vase with a small snowdrop in it. After finishing his duties for the day, he had made the short flight on Vermax to the forest glade where he had located the snowdrop meadow, hoping that the sight of her favourite flower would cheer his lady. When she was well again, he resolved to ask her if she would like to see the meadow in person, but for now, this one would have to do. Balancing the tray in one hand, he knocked lightly on his lady's chamber door, hearing a brief rustling before she cautiously opened the door, clearly not expecting him.

He only caught a brief glimpse of her, before she quickly shut the door, her eyes widening in alarm when she saw him. He stood there, confused at her response, wondering if she was too unwell to see him or if he had unknowingly upset her by not coming to see her before. Recovering from his confusion, he knocked gently upon the door again, and spoke in a hushed voice.

"Are you well, my love. I apologise for not coming to check on you before, I was prevented from doing so by my duties. Otherwise, I would have come sooner. I can leave, if you would prefer it." He said the last part in a tone, which revealed a hint of sadness. He needn't have worried. However, as she promptly opened the door again, her form wrapped, he was pleased to see, in the cape he had purposefully left in her possession, yesterday. In her haste to evade his attempts to kiss her the night before, Y/N had turned into her chambers, still wearing Jacaerys' cloak around her shoulders.

Making his way back to his own chambers that night, he smiled softly at the image of her lovely form encased in his cloak, hoping it would keep her warm. The image continued to comfort him throughout the next day; if he could not be with her in person, her heart warmed to think that his cloak might offer her comfort in his absence.

A blush bloomed on his cheeks at the realisation that she may have been embarrassed to appear before him in only her nightgown, and he mentally rebuked himself for not having forewarned her of his visit. The vision of her before him with his cloak around her was, nevertheless, most welcome. Of course, she did not realise that he had kept his own token always about his person to feel close to her.

Early on in their acquaintance, Y/N had left a frayed blue ribbon out on a book she had been reading, when she did not know he observed her. When she had quit the library, Jacaerys had pocketed the ribbon and had smiled when he saw Y/N return to her book the next night to find it missing. He had felt bad about it afterwards, and had since gifted her a deep blue, velvet ribbon, trimmed with silver lace and intricate foiling to replace it. For his part, he would much rather have the frayed ribbon. It was superior in his mind for being her ribbon, and he had continued to keep it in his tunic, where his heart was.

Drawing his mind back to the present and to his lady, who stood with an uncharacteristically bashful look upon her face as she looked up at him, he smiled at her. The hours he had passed in her absence had seemed so painfully long to him, particularly when he was already so concerned for her, and his delight at seeing her was clearly impressed upon his features. He lifted the tray of hot chocolate and the flower out to her.

"I hope you have rested well today, my dove, and that you are feeling a little better since last night. I hoped that this might help you to sleep."

Y/N looked from the tray to Jacaerys in surprise, speaking in a hesitant voice.

"You made me hot chocolate?"

Jacaerys expression turned sheepish as he looked from the tray to his lady's eyes.

"I certainly tried. I believe I remember the process from watching you did it several times. I hope I have done it correctly. Of course, you don't have to drink it, I just thought..."

"Thank you, Jacaerys. That's so sweet." He was relieved to see his lady smiling brightly up at him, happy to have pleased her, if only with such a simple gesture.

"It is no trouble, my sweet. Have you felt better today?", concern re-entering his voice.

"A bit better today, and I'm sure much better for drinking your hot chocolate."

Jacaerys continued to smile lovingly at her, not for the first time, becoming lost in gazing at her and not feeling the moments pass. Her gentle cough brought him back to his senses, and he bowed jerkily before wishing her sweet dreams, not wishing to cause her discomfort by lingering too long by her chamber door.

Y/N had laughed when she closed her chamber door on Jacaerys. She drank the hot beverage eagerly, her heart warmed by his sweet gesture, even if the milk was a little lukewarm and he had put a tad too much chocolate into the mixture. The fact that he had made it made it perfect. She wrapped his cloak tighter around her shoulders, as if it were really his arms wrapped around her. Sipping the drink he had made her, wrapped securely in his cloak, Y/N found it difficult to feel too gloomy, despite her illness.

Jacaerys continued to visit her for the next three days, each time returning with another hot chocolate, the flavour of which was improving since the cook caught him 'making a mess' and was compelled to teach him 'to do the thing properly or not at all'. The thought of the irascible cook scolding the crowned Prince elicited an affectionate laugh from Y/N. Jacaerys had been horrified when he realised he had, in fact, been making the drink wrong.

"But why did you not tell me so. You always told me it was perfect. I should not like for you to force yourself to drink it if it was inedible."

Laughing indulgently at him, Y/N had pressed her hand to his cheek, a gesture she knew usually had the effect of stopping Jacaerys in his tracks.

"It was lovely of you to make me hot chocolate in the first place. It was perfect because you made it." His bright smile, his eyes alight with adoration for her, was more than enough compensation for drinking some less than palatable hot chocolate.

By the fourth day Jacaerys came to check on his lady, he had even added a dusting of cinnamon and nutmeg to the concoction, his conspiratorial smirk clearly conveying that he was pleased with his creation and now considered himself to have mastered the process. He schooled his features, however, before knocking on her door, not wishing to appear too smug just yet. He'd been wrong about his skill in the kitchen before. His lady was slower coming to the door than previous days, and she only opened the door a crack so that Jacaerys found himself trying to look around the door in search of her. Her voice came out to him disembodied behind the door.

"I am not feeling so well today, my Prince. I am not fit to be seen right now. Thank you for coming to check on me.

Jacaerys felt a sense of panic rising in him at the dry sound of her voice, as if it pained her to speak, and at her admission of feeling worse. Haphazardly placing the tray of hot chocolate and another flower on a nearby side table, he stepped closer to the door.

"How much worse is it? You should be feeling better by now. Can I do anything, get anything for you?" His words came out more frantic than he had intended.

"No no, thank you Jacaerys but I'm perfectly fine. Illnesses like this always get worse before they get better, I shall be recovered in no time. I wish you good night."

Jacaerys' eyes widened in alarm as Y/N began to close the door on him, not content to leave her without first seeing her and assessing her condition for himself. Her haste to evade him and her secretive manner led him to fear that her condition was worse than she was owning to him. He must ascertain her condition for himself before he even thought of leaving. Jacaerys placed his boot and hand in between the door and the wall to prevent it from closing.

"My love, you must be far worse if you will not even see me. Why will you not come out so that I can assess your condition. Perhaps I should call for the Maestors?"

To his surprise, his lady's voice came out panicked as she urgently entreated him to let go of the door.

"I will only do so when I am sure that you are not concealing how unwell you are. I...."

A brief struggle had ensued, with both parties pulling the door, which resulted in Jacaerys tumbling head first into the room.

Y/N's hands came flying up to her mouth in shock at her having sent the Prince falling into her room with her antics.

"Jacaerys! Are you alright?!"

Quickly righting himself, Jacaerys jumped up and strode purposefully to his lady, gently taking hold of her elbows in his hands.

"Never mind me. How much worse is it and what can I do to help you?"

His eyes flitted frantically across her features, trying to ascertain the nature of her condition, so he was caught off guard when Y/N pushed him away from her back towards the door. Hurriedly turning away from him, she addressed him with her hands covering her face.

"You can't be in here Jacaerys. I don't wish you to see me like this."

Now Jacaerys was really panicked. How ill was she?!

"Like what?! Do you have another ailment I am not aware of. Where is the injury?"

Jacaerys tried to move around Y/N to face her, but she continued to walk out of his path, much to his confusion. He couldn't understand why she was trying to hide from him if she had not been beset by some symptoms that she did not wish him to be aware of. He knew it was her nature to conceal anything that ailed her, for fear of being a burden. He would not allow her to evade him so easily, not when her health was at stake. Taking a gentle yet firm hold of her elbows once again, he turned her towards him, though she continued to cover her face with her hands.

"Stop with this silliness, my dove. Now calmly tell me what ails you and why you are hiding it from me, otherwise I will go mad."

Pulling her hands away from her face, she cast him a sterner gaze than he had yet merited from her.

"Oh Jacaerys, you are relentless. I am perfectly fine. Can't you see that I only closed the door because I did not wish you to see me look so unwell. I look horrible." After her outburst, she quickly turned her head away from him, her cheeks ablaze.

Ah. That had been it. She had been embarrassed to appear sick before him and he had, like a brute, forced her to open the door in his panic that she was seriously unwell.

He gently turned her face back towards him with his hand, bring his other hand up to caress her cheek. Dark circles formed purple crescents under her eyes, and her countenance looked paler than usual, her nose slightly runny, but Jacaerys only saw the most beautiful girl in the world before him. Still, if she was embarrassed and had not wanted him to see her, he should not have pressed her.

"You are beautiful, you needn't hide from me. I am sorry for forcing my way in, I behaved like a brute. It was only out of concern for you, my love. Will you forgive me?" He looked into her eyes penitently, watching her expression shift from irritation to one that showed she was relenting in her anger towards him. Reaching out to lightly grip his tunic in her hand, she responded in a voice that still held a hint of frustration in it.

"You did behave badly, but I suppose it was because you were concerned."

Jacaerys took hold of her other hand in both of his, pressing it insistently.

"It was, I assure you my love. If I had known you were merely uncomfortable with me seeing you right now I would not have pressed the point, though I wish you would not feel so. You never need hide from me. You are always perfect to me."

He held his breath a moment before the tension left his body, as she leant her head against his chest and laid her palm on his tunic.

"You fool." She laughed into his chest. "It's your fault if I sneeze on you."

Wrapping his arms around her, relieved that she had forgiven him and that she was now allowing him to hold her, he laughed at her appelation.

"Have I not formerly confessed to being your fool, my dove?"

Huffing in mock irritation with him, she nevertheless patted his chest.

"You did, my Prince."

Jacaerys continued to embrace her for a few moments before he kissed her hand and ran out of the room, swiftly returning with the tray he had left aside before. "A new attempt for you to try, my sweet. I think you'll like this one, " he added, a slight lilt to his voice that had Y/N struggling to surpress a smile at how pleased he was with himself. Taking a few sips from the teacup, she looked up at Jacaerys in surprise.

"This is the best hot chocolate I have ever had. What on earth did you put in it?"

Jacaerys smirked in satisfaction, as if he expected her to say that.

"A master never reveals his secrets. I suppose you shall have to simply allow me to make you more until you guess what the secret ingredient is."

Y/N beamed up at Jacaerys, her heart full of love for him as she saw behind his speech. In his usual fashion, he was only hoping to slyly coax her into allowing him to care for her. It was just like her Prince to do so.

[thebenjiblackwoodexpress]

Snow Drop Part. 9

Description: Jacaerys seeks to convince the serving girl he's fallen in love with to be his princess. Y/N teaches Jacaerys the joys of hot chocolate in Dragonstone's kitchen, where secrets of her scarred past are revealed to the Prince.

Writer’s Note: Hey guys, Elizabeth here with an update to my Jacaerys story. Sorry for the long hiatus. I’ve been unwell and unable to write but back on track now, hopefully. There will also be two more parts uploaded in the next two days. Hope you guys enjoy! Dividers by @zaldritzosrose

Warnings: Female reader, mentions of past sexual assault and trauma.

Y/N tentatively handled the tiaras Jacaerys had so thoughtfully procured for her to look at, knowing by now of her fascination with princesses. She had been embarrassed about this at first, but quickly came to consider it as a further sign of his sweetness to her: that he not only indulged her in her interest, specifically reading of Targaryen princesses to her, but also actively encouraged her to view herself as one of their number. As his Princess. Each of the tiaras were more beautiful than she had the words to express and she could never have imagined, as a young girl dreaming of being a Princess, that she would be handling such precious objects. Each one bore an intricate design, encrusted with priceless gems of Ruby, emerald, topaz and quartz, as Jacaerys would explain whenever she asked what each was called. So enamoured with looking into the gems was she, that she did not notice Jacaerys smiling fondly at her, as he leant against a nearby pillar observing her.

One diadem, in particular, caught her attention, its beauty evoking in her a sense of wonder surpassing that of all the previous ones. This one she lifted more tentatively, holding it to the moonlight to observe how it shone through the white gems like distilled starlight. She gasped as the light passed through the gems and she realised that the delicate foiling around them was meant to resemble snowdrops. Her favourite flower. She then noticed the intricate dragon design interwoven throughout the piece, closely resembling Jacaerys' dragon. She looked up at Jacaerys and met his own gaze, intently trained on hers, as if in anticipation of her reaction. She hesitantly questioned, "this is the most beautiful. Are these snowdrops? The gems look just like the petals. And this dragon looks so much like Vermax." As she spoke, Jacaerys smiled knowingly, responding in a teasing voice: "I am glad that my Princess has found a crown to her liking although, of course, she shall have all of them."

Taking slow steps toward her, he took the tiara from her hands, brushing his fingers against hers as he did so, and placed it on her head. As he affectionately tucked a loose lock of hair behind her hair and stroked her cheek, he met her quizzical gaze with his own adoring one. "I hope you do not think it presumptuous, but I designed this one myself. I wanted to show you how much you are woven into mine own heart, my Princess." Her mouth parted in surprise at this. She had not thought that these tiaras were for her; they were entirely too beautiful, too precious.

The thought that Jacaerys had specifically designed this one for her, to resemble her favourite flower, interlocking with the symbol of his House, made her heart almost burst with affection for him. She felt tears welling in her eyes at his thoughtfulness, which caused a look of alarm to alight in Jacaerys' eyes, as he frantically took hold of her elbows in his hands. "What's wrong, my dove. Have I upset you in some manner? I did not mean to rush you, if that is it." Hearing the panicked note in his voice, she quickly silenced him, pulling the fabric of his tunic so that she could reach, as she crashed her lips onto his. As he wrapped his arms around her waist to pull her closer to him, he lowered his head so she would not have to reach for him, and smiled against her lips as she brought a hand up to toy with his hair. It still warmed his heart that she should like his hair, even find it beautiful, when so many others had viewed it as an impediment. When she finally pulled away, Jacaerys making it a rule never to do so first, they were both breathless and Jacaerys not a little dazed as he struggled to say something witty. He only managed to say, "I take it you liked my gift, then, my Princess" in a breathless voice before she burst out laughing and he smiled in contentment at the sweet sound.

It was late on the next evening, when Y/N made her way back down to the servants' quarters after a long day. She had been particularly busy that day and hadn't found the time to meet Jacaerys at the library. She hoped he wouldn't mind, even if she herself missed him, but she quickly banished the thought. It was silly to think he should miss her after only a short time.

As she rounded the final hallway back to the kitchens, to make herself a hot beverage before bed, she was startled to see Prince Jacaerys casually leaning against a wall, smiling and standing up straight when he saw her approach. She excitedly skipped up to him, grabbing his elbows in her hands as she smiled up at him. "And what brings you down here at such an hour, my Prince". Jacaerys could not stop his heart from stuttering at her appellation, knowing now that she meant to say that he was her Prince. Wanting to feel her touch, he playfully tapped his jaw, before she rolled her eyes and rose on tiptoe to kiss the place he had indicated.

Before she could, however, he quickly turned his head to capture her lips with his, smiling against her lips as he heard her startled squeak, before she raised her palms to steady herself against his chest. When she drew away, breaking the kiss, she swatted his chest playfully. "That was not very Princely". He lowered his head to kiss her jaw, "my apologies, my Princess. I hope you will forgive me." She affectionately patted his jaw, still encircled within his arms as he gazed lovingly down at her. His voice suddenly turning serious, he looked at her intently. "I was concerned when I did not see you today or later in the library. I worried that you were unwell." Her heart stuttering at his concern for her, she pressed her palm to his cheek as he placed his own above her hand to hold it in place and lean into her touch. "It was only that I had many duties to attend to today and did not have the time, nothing more than that." He frowned at that. "I do not like to think of you working so hard that you only return to your own chambers at such an hour. If you would only let me tell my mother of our betrothal and allow me to have you moved to the Royal apartments, I..." she interrupted him once more with a quick peck to his lips. "Not yet, I will tell you when I'm ready," She added in a contrite tone.

He dejectedly nodded his head but took her hand and raised it to his lips, all the same." As you wish, my Princess. Would you at least promise to find me in the library to walk you back, in future. I do not like the thought of you traversing these dark halls alone at such an hour." Nodding at him, she playfully rolled her eyes at his protectiveness, even as her heart secretly skipped a beat at it. "Will you allow me to escort you back to your room now?" He asked hopefully. "I was actually just making my way to the kitchen to make a hot beverage before bed, would you like to join me?" He smiled jubilantly at her suggestion, taking hold of her hand. "Lead the way, Princess" He said, being sure he would follow her anywhere if she asked him to. Interlocking her fingers with his, she dragged him in the way of the kitchen.

Jacaerys smiled at the sight of her hand interlocked with his and affectionately squeezed hers as she led him to the kitchen. This late at night, the fire from the lanterns on the walls cast a golden, ambient glow on the stone walls, creating a warm atmosphere. As Y/N withdrew her hand from Jacaerys', he found himself reflexively reaching his hand out to recapture hers, making her laugh. Seeing his uncharacteristically bashful look, she patted his jaw affectionately and pointed at a nearby chair at the kitchen bench. "Take a seat Jacaerys. I'll make the drinks." Jacaerys obediently sat but was quick to ask her if he could help and was surprised when she laughed again. "That won't be necessary, My Prince." Smirking at her, he teasingly questioned, "and what is so funny, may I ask?" She could not repress her smile as she responded in an equally teasing manner, "only that I highly doubt a Prince would know the first thing about using a kitchen. Have you ever even boiled some water?" Jacaerys had a sheepish expression on his face as he said, "well...not exactly, but I'm sure I could learn and I would be very happy to help. You shouldn't be making me a drink for me after finishing your other duties. Perhaps if you show me how to do it, I can do it for you next time."

Y/N had been fully prepared to tease Jacaerys over his lack of competence in the kitchen, but his sweet offer to learn how to make her favourite drink for her made her walk up to him instead at his perch on a bench, so that she was between his legs, and kiss him. His arms immediately reached out to encircle her waist and pull her toward him. When she broke the kiss, she delighted to note that he had a slight dazed expression on his face. She loved to elicit such a response from kissing him, pleased that he should be as affected by her as she was by him. Rubbing his hands up and down her back, he smiled at her as he questioned, "and what did I do to merit such a response?" She brushed a lock of his hair from his forehead and smiled at him, "You're just sweet." His smile expanded at this, as he pinched her cheek, "not as sweet as you, my Princess."

As he leant down to recaptured her lips, she pressed her forefinger to his lips before skipping away from him, his arms reaching out as if to stop her. She giggled at the pout on his face, "I shall never get my hot chocolate if I allow you to distract me." He smirked at this, saying in a cocky tone, "so you find me distracting, my Princess?" Rolling her eyes, she lifted the saucepan and held it over the stove she had just lit to boil the milk, "only because you are so annoying". She laughed as his pout, which she was sure he didn't realise he did, returned, finding the expression adorable.

As she prepared the hot chocolate, mixing the heated milk and spices of cinnamon, cardamon, and nutmeg in the pot, she caught glimpses of Jacaerys leaning up from his seat to watch her, a look of intense concentration on his face. She tried not to laugh at his evident confusion, most likely thinking she was performing some feat of sorcery. Her heart warmed to see him mouthing the steps of the process as if to commit them to memory for future reference. The thought of the Prince of the Realm making her hot chocolate was at once inexpressibly sweet and funny.

After ladling the warm milk, steeped in chocolate and spices, into two mugs, she made to carry them over to the table where Jacaerys was sitting. No sooner had she reached out to do so then she heard Jacaerys run the short distance from the bench he was perched on to her. Wrapping an arm around her torso, he playfully spun her so that she was behind him, smirking at her surprised expression. Lifting the tray with their drinks on it, and snatching a kiss to her cheek, he began to walk back to the table, inclining his head to indicate that she should follow him. She raised her brow in mock displeasure and placed her hands on her hips, "I am more than capable of lifting two mugs on my own, Jacaerys". Smiling playfully at her, he rejoined, "I would not want my Princess to burn her beautiful hands, not when her Prince can take the burden from her." She blushed furiously at this, not least because she had the hands of a serving maid, rather than a lady, and yet he still found them beautiful. No man had ever been so considerate of her wellbeing and of her feelings...not even when she had believed that one had been.

She shook her head to rid herself of that unwanted thought and instead redirected her gaze to Prince Jacaerys, her Prince, patting the bench next to him to urge her to sit. A smile spread across her face at the sight and she half skipped to sit beside him. As soon as she had sat down, Jacaerys frowned down at the small space she had left between them. Raising his own eyebrow playfully, as she had done before, he wrapped his arm around her torso and pulled her flush against his side. He smiled triumphantly at her as he saw her trying to suppress her own smile and look reproachfully at him. Lowering his head, he pressed his lips to the side of her jaw, whispering against it, "I prefer to keep you this close to me." Pulling away to see her reaction to his teasing, he smiled at the blush on her cheeks as she tried to turn her head away from his gaze. Gently taking hold of his lady's chin between his forefinger and thumb, he turned her face back to his, and stroked her jaw with his thumb. "I would have you be this close to me forever and always, my dove." He lowered his head slowly to press a reverent, lingering kiss to her forehead, before moving back to allow her space to recover herself from his attentions.

A moment later, Y/N interlocked their hands together on the bench and smiled shyly up at him. Quickly shifting his gaze from their interlocked hands to meet his lady's shy gaze, he looked into her eyes with a tender expression, dazed by the sweetness of her affectionate gesture. He squeezed her hand in his, content to feel her delicate hand enclosed within his own, as he raised their hands to rest them against his lap. She smiled at him in response, and he felt his heart stutter at her beauty and the comforting thought that she was pleased by his attentions.

For so long he had been under the painful impression that she would never return his love for her, and that he would be forced to love her in silence. Coughing lightly, Y/N pushed a mug, with her free hand, across the table in Jacaerys’ direction. "Stop looking so pleased with yourself, Jacaerys and try the drink I so carefully made for you." He smirked at her as he replied, "what was that, my dove? I will, of course, be only too pleased to try the drink you so lovingly made for me." He tried to repress a laugh as he watched a look of realisation pass over his lady's features at his emphasis on the word 'lovingly'. His heart swelled with affection for his lady as she adorably swatted his shoulder, "drink the hot chocolate, you knave." His face immediately fell from its previous look of elation at her appellation. Pouting, he grumbled, "what happened to your Prince?" Half hoping she would kiss him for his troubles, he was surprised, but no less pleased, when she lightly took hold of his chin in her hand. Tapping the tip of his nose, she laughed as she told him to "remove the long face. I will give you a kiss if you drink it." His eyes suddenly lit up as he quickly lifted the mug to his lips, burning his tongue in his attempt to claim the proffered reward of his love's affection.

At his slightly pained expression, Y/N brushed her lips against Jacaerys' in the ghost of a kiss, as his eyes fluttered closed in contentment. He little cared if he burned his mouth if the feel of her soft, precious lips on his would be the reward. Drawing away, she tapped his jaw, smiling indulgently at him. "You are a silly boy." A grin spread on his face at her teasing, "I am not sure how well that bodes for the realm, for the Prince to be a 'silly boy'" He sighed, "but If I am to be thought so, it is only on the condition that I am your silly boy." He looked into her eyes intently at this, hoping to convey the seriousness of his meaning behind his eyes, even if his tone was light and teasing.

He really did mean to say that he would be happy to be called any playful insult she had for him, if only to be thought hers. If she would only continue to honour him with her love and trust and to look to him for comfort and protection, both for her person and her heart. He had not realised how long he had been staring at her, as if he couldn't believe she was real, he laughed again and he realised he must look a fool. Coughing lightly he took another sip of the drink to appease her. "It's delicious, you are most skilled." In truth, she could have made him a noxious concoction and he would have said much the same, favouring the drink merely because his lady had been the one to make it with her lovely hands. "I have never had such a drink." Smiling tenderly at him, she sipped her own drink and he nearly became distracted, again, in staring at her lips.

"It's called hot chocolate. My mother used to make it for me on special occasions when we had the money for the chocolate. It was rare but it was all the more special for it. Of course we wouldn't have made it with milk but it was just as nice with hot water. The point was that it was our special thing that we would look forward to doing together. We would take turns coming up with new recipes with the spices we had and it became almost a game to make the best recipe out of what we had." A dreamy expression settled onto Y/N's features as she relayed her childhood memories. "She'd usually save some for my birthday and she'd make me a cup before reading me a story. Those are some of my fondest memories, listening to my mother read me a story by candlelight, burrowed under the blankets. Even now the smell of it reminds me of those times and of her." There's always a steady supply of chocolate here, one of the many perks of serving Queen Rhaenyra." Y/N smiled nonchalantly at Jacaerys when she had finished her story but was surprised to see that his own expression looked almost pained. Before she could ascertain the reason, he carefully raised his knuckle to gently caress the side of her cheek, looking at her with a look of utmost concern. "It is a beautiful memory to have. I would love to have met your mother. I confess that it pains me to think of you suffering any hardships, my dove. I would shield you from any difficulties if could."

She found herself, once again, stunned by his consideration for her feelings and her past struggles. Even now he stared into her eyes with his warm brown ones, as if he wanted to protect her from all the evils of the world....even one so little as an absence of hot chocolate. That last thought made her laugh again, which caused Jacaerys to frown, not understanding the cause. He asked his next question in a tentative voice, as if fearful of her answer, "do not you believe me, my love?". She patted his chest affectionately, smiling as she responded, "it is only the thought of you defending me from a shortage of hot chocolate that makes me laugh." His eyes lit up mischievously and he smirked as he responded in a teasing tone. "I hope my lady will take my genuine concern for her hot chocolate needs more seriously. I shall have a shipment of chocolate brought in from the Gullet if it shall please my Princess. If I have to sack King's Landing for a steady supply, I will have no hesitation." He rejoiced as his Princess broke out into laughter at this, delighted to have elicited such a sweet sound from her, even if he was only half joking. He would have to see the kitchens had a steady supply of the drink for his lady and he would learn to make it himself, so that he could surprise her.

The Prince and his love talked late into the night, as the guttering candles along the walls attested to. Jacaerys paid little heed to the passage of time, engrossed in anything that his lady had to say, no matter the topic. His fascination with her far exceeded her own in even Princes and dragons, viewing her as by far the most wonderful being in existence.

One thought did keep clawing its way to the surface of his mind: What was the cause for his lady's continual evasions of his requests to announce their betrothal? He sought to understand what could be the cause of her delays and if he could remedy any concerns she might have. He could not but worry that it was her difficulty trusting in him that was the cause...that she had changed her mind about him. Resolving to uncover the cause without further delay, he took a deep breath as he prepared for her answer. "What is it that leads you to delay our marriage, my dove? Is it something I can remedy or...is it" He stuttered, "is it me that is is the problem? Do you not yet trust in the depths of my love for you?" She looked momentarily stunned at his directness, having hoped to evade this question for longer, she began looking frantically anywhere but his eyes. Jacaerys once again brought his hand up to gently cup her cheek and turn her face back to meet his own gaze. "Please answer me, my love. I am in agony fearing that it is your distrust in myself which causes this delay. If it is so, tell me what I can do to prove my love for you." He looked at her with so much sincerity and genuine concern in his eyes that she felt she could no longer conceal the real reason for her delay. Whilst she loved Jacaerys and could think of no greater happiness than marrying him, she was also painfully aware of her having felt the same way about another man who had betrayed her trust.

She could not completely erase the fear from her mind that Jacaerys would do the same. She realised that she would have to be completely honest with him if he were to fully allay her fears. She took a deep breath, as she prepared to reveal the cause of her delays and risk his potential rejection. "I wish to tell you something which should go some way to explaining my hesitation. But it may also change your opinion of me. You may not wish to marry me when you hear it. She spoke in a quiet, tentative voice, which expressed her concern that he would be displeased with her. Hearing her dejected tone, Jacaerys took hold of both of her hands in his, cradling them in his lap, as he urged her to continue. Gazing intently into her eyes, hoping to convey the intensity of his love for her in them, he spoke in a resolute tone: "I can already assure you, my sweet, that nothing could ever shake my most earnest desire to marry you. You are and shall remain the Princess of my heart, even should you decide, yourself, to cast me aside." Not fully convinced by this, but nonetheless comforted by his assurance, Y/N continued. "When I was younger, I fell in love with another man. He, too, told me he loved me and made a proposal of marriage. I was foolish enough then to believe in the honesty of his intentions, blinded by my love for him. I was made all too aware of his intentions, however, when...."

Seeing his lady hesitate, intaking a sharp breath and wincing at the memory, he squeezed her hands gently, hesitant to initiate any more intimate embrace as he began to understand what she wished to tell him. He struggled to contain his own anger with the man who had harmed his love, forcing himself to remain outwardly calm, so as not to further alarm her or make her believe herself to be the cause of his ire. Instead, he merely waited patiently for her to continue. "When he tried to force himself on me when I refused to give him what he wanted. I was fortunate that one of the servants boys came across us when they did and intervened. The thought of what could have happened still terrified and haunts me. I had known this man since I was a girl, believing him in earnest when he said that he loved me and wanted to marry me. I am not so naive as to believe every man's promise now. Whilst I do love you Jacaerys and really wish to be your wife, I cannot deny that I still fear that you will change in your manner towards me...that you will betray me in some way or another and that I will have been a fool again. It is hard to give another my trust fully when it was so cruelly trampled the first time."

As she finished speaking, he felt his heart string tugged painfully as he saw her lip tremble and her eyes brim with tears, as if she was trying her best not to fall apart in front of him. Her words had pained him inexpressibly, and he found himself struggling to choke back his own tears at the agonising thought of his love having suffered so much pain. He also fought to suppress his rage at the man who had dared to harm both his lady's heart and person. He could not fathom how anyone could harm one so precious and delicate. Jacaerys inwardly resolved that he would find this man, no matter where he was in the Seven Kingdoms, and he would kill him. He quickly filed this thought away, however. His main concern now, and always, would always be his lady. She needed him now. He knew he would have to approach comforting her delicately, in order to make her feel safe after revealing such a traumatic memory. Speaking in a gentle, cautious tone as if she were a startled deer, he asked, 'may I hold you?" He was relieved when she merely nodded before leaning her head forward to rest on his shoulder, and he carefully brought his arms up to hold her protectively to him, one hand caressing her head as he encircled his other arm around her waist. He rubbed his hand up and down her spine as he whispered soft assurances against her hair. "Hush now, my dove. I am here. Thank you for telling me, my brave girl, I understand now. Please believe me when I make you my solemn promise that I will never allow anyone to harm you again."

He held her tighter to him in a protective embrace, wishing he could take her pain from her and make it his own, as she whimpered into his shoulder. Whilst he would not reveal the full extent of his anger towards the villain who had not only assaulted his love, but had also made her feel as if she were to blame. His chest constricted in pain at his dove's admission that she even feared that he would place blame on her. Breathing shakily, he drew back slightly from their embrace to hold Y/N's face in both his hands, looking seriously into her eyes so that she would understand he meant every word he said. "I wish you to understand that none of what happened was your fault. It pains me to think that you would fear any judgement from me on that account, but I understand your feelings. The craven scoundrel who attacked you is solely to blame and you, my dove, are most brave for telling me something, which I know must have been only too painful to recount."

Seeing that her breathing was becoming calmer, as she looked into his eyes, he continued, stroking small circles on her jaw with his thumbs. "I am honoured by the trust you have placed in me in telling me this. I understand, now, your hesitation to trust fully in my love, knowing how cruelly your precious love has been abused in the past. I can only hope that you will allow me to prove in any way you will allow me to that my love and respect for you will never waver." As he finished speaking, only hoping that she would believe in the ardency of his love and respect for her, he was relieved when she buried her head in his chest. Responding immediately to her need for comfort from him, hating to see her cry and desiring only to make her feel safe and protected, he wrapped his arms more securely around her, cradling her head in his hand. As he continued to hold her to him and whisper soft assurances that she was safe in his arms, Jacaerys mentally vowed to protect his precious love from any harm and to personally despatch the man who had dared to harm her.

[thebenjiblackwoodexpress]

If you saw Snowdrop part 11 briefly pop up no you didn't 😂 parts 9-11 are written and now ready to go up so part 9 will be uploaded later.