#now I need to clean up my kitchen XD

[blackcatanna]

Just made some creamy mushroom and thyme soup with the aid of the immersion blender my Mum got me for Christmas and NOW I AM UNSTOPPABLE! A WHOLE WORLD OF SOUPS, SMOOTHIES AND MOUSES HAS OPENED BEFORE ME! THIS SHALL BE THE MAGIC WAND THAT LEADS ME INTO A GLORIOUS CULINARY FUTURE! ALL SHALL TREMBLE IN MY WAKE!

[umnitsa]

Still a dirty old man

Summary: Joel is on his seventies, but he still has needs. Well, we all have needs.

A/N: Ok, so. Look, I'm gonna be honest: life kicked my ass, I just got into college (again eeee), god knows how this is gonna go, but here, I heard you all: I wanted more and there is more. I can't help myself, I want this man in dirty, horrible ways. Thanks @romanarose, for the pair of eyes and as always, thanks for everyone who asked for more and cheered me with this. Really, I can't thank you enough.

(I must admit that I don't know if I'll ever continue this, specially with the way life is going now. Although part of me wants to get to three thousand sex scenes, I need to be honest: not even I know if this will continue. Don't wanna give y'all false promises.)

Pairing: No outbreak old man!Joel x Reader

CW: Joel being bold, me trying dirty talk and failing miserably, a handjob, very much predator/prey dynamics

No beta, we die like lonely writers xD

Joel behaved as if nothing happened, and so did you.

Things were somewhat tense though. Not for Joel, no. The man just smirked everytime he saw you then lowered his head and chuckled, as if he knew something you didn’t know.

You had to admit it bothered you.

Cocky bastard.

You moved into the kitchen, needing some water. You could hear the faint sounds of tv in the living room, so Joel was sitting down on his recliner, watching some late night sports.

You wondered if Joel would want a snack before sleep, as you filled your cup distractedly. You took a drink, considering the options in the fridge, when a loud cheering sound comes from the living room. You startled, the glass shatters on the floor with a loud noise and your yelp.

“What happened?” Joel yelled from the living room, concern clear in his voice.

“I just dropped a glass, Joel! You don’t need to worry, I’m gonna clean it.” You said, getting on your knees carefully. You placed your hands on the floor and lowered your face to see better. Glass was tricky to see.

You checked the floor, picking the pieces of glass and piling them together; you thought of getting a bag, or some paper to wrap them on after making sure all the glass was retrieved.

“Mmmm…” you heard, and you turned your head back. Joel was at the kitchen door, looking down intensely at your ass. “Such a heavenly view… Makes me wanna get on my knees… Worship your asshole and your pretty pussy with my tongue.” Joel licked his lips and you blushed.

“Joel!” You said, sternly.

“What?” He asked, no shame whatsoever.

“Come on.” You complained, picking the rest of the shattered glass as quickly as you could. As you move angrily you felt a sharp sting of pain. “Fuck!”

Joel quickly wobbled by your side and watched your bleeding finger.

“Here, honey… Leave it. We can clean it later.” He offered you his broad hand, suddenly overflowing with gentleness. “Lemme see your hand.”

You stood up, mesmerized by his eyes, and show you his hand. He held it between his calloused, big, bony ones and slowly leaned to suckle on the tip of your finger.

You were so mesmerized by his deep brown eyes focused on yours, glinting with mischief, that you only realize what he is doing with the first gentle swipe of his tongue against your skin. He gently swirled his tongue around your fingertip, suckling softly; he was showing you what he can do with your clit.

He smirked when you moaned, still holding your wrist with one hand, the other moving down out of your sight.

Joel sighed deeply, in relief, and you realized he opened his pants and took his cock out. He massaged the shaft slowly and you could only watch, dumbrounded, your mouth half open.

“He always wakes up for you, honey.” Joel chuckled. “I thought we were retired, but there he is. Since you came into the house my pants got way too tight. I keep thinking of making you my three-hole-wonder, honey.” He licked his lips and smirked. “Maybe you should give him a little kiss, at least to calm him down.”

The old man looked down, pouting and doe eyed, then back to your face. You found it hard to resist him, when he looked at you like that.

“We can’t do this, Joel.” You swallowed your saliva, considering his cock. It was long, and thick, from tip to base, the head an angry purple that made you want to suck on it. You considered the pain and the stretch he would give you, and the more you thought, the more you wanted to just give in. “I’m supposed to care for your needs.” You said, distractedly.

Your mouth watered and you licked your lips.

“We are both adults.” His eyebrows raised, and he cocked his head. “This is clearly a need. And only you can care for this one.” He smirked again, proudly. His hand kept moving, in this slow, hypnotizing pace.

“So you don’t do this to the day nurse?” You scoffed.

“She’s not my type.” Joel shrugged, a playful expression in his eyes. “Way too young and way too thin.” After a moment of silence, Joel steps forward and holds your hand. He watched your reactions carefully, sliding his calloused thumb over the back of your hand.

You didn’t move.

Joel raised your hand to his face and spit on your palm. You jumped, startled; another chuckle came from him, filling the space between you. Gently, he wrapped your hand around his cock. His big, bony fingers engulfed yours, guiding you into his rhythm.

His cock felt a bit soft at first, but it still got bigger and harder in your hand.

“Mmmmm… Haven’t felt this good in decades.” He muttered, his voice low, eyes closed.

“We shouldn’t be doing this.” You whispered, more a reminder to yourself than a refusal.

“Not standing in the kitchen, we shouldn’t.” Joel growled. “But you didn’t give me much choice… You keep running, bunny. I’d rather taste you, but I take what I can get.”

“I… I…” You lost your words as you look into his eyes. He watched you intensely, his eyes locked into yours. You felt like he was drinking every single one of your reactions, a hawk-eyed creature looming over you, ready to devour you whole.

“Give in, honey.” His voice was gentle, soft, in contrast with the hunger in his expression. “It will make our nights much more fun.”

You whined, leaning forward, your eyes closed. You felt Joel’s lips against yours, one big hand cupping the back of your head, pulling you closer. He growled into the kiss. Your whole body tensed; you squeeze him, the meaning of what you’re doing suddenly very real.

Joel’s fingers clenched, tugging on your hair tightly. Your head moved back; you gasped as Joel’s slips slid down your jaw, towards your ear.

“Wanna run, bunny?” He whispered, his voice suddenly soft. “Don’t run. Just wanna ruin you a little bit.”

His hand squeezed yours; you followed his move, squeezing his cock. Joel moaned, cock twitching in your hand. He moaned loudly, hips thrusting forward. Grunting, he came; some of it transferring to your hand, some splashing against your thigh.

Joel stepped back, releasing you, a smug satisfied smile on his lips.

“See? Just a little bit.” He chuckled, pulling himself into his pants.

“Joel, we shouldn’t…”

“Honey, if you didn’t want me to keep trying, you would have told me. Or Sarah.” Joel huffed, interrupting you impatiently. “She would have killed me by now.”

“How do you know… You could lie to her and she would believe you.”

“I raised her right. And hell if she doesn’t know exactly the kind of man I am.” Joel chuckled, looking at you with a warm, appreciative smile. He shrugged. “You keep saying we shouldn’t, we can’t… You just don’t say we won’t.”

You bristled, puffing your chest and placing your hands on your hips, glaring at him. Your mouth half open, a thousand million tiny things you could say bubble in your throat.

“Go on. Just say: Joel, I won’t play this game with you. Stop right now.” Joel stood in front of you, watching your expression carefully.

The silence extended between you both.

You considered saying it, but you knew it would not be true. Deep inside you wanted him to hunt and ruin you. His smile broadened slowly, as the silent seconds went by. You blushed, lowering your head. You shook it gently.

“That’s what I thought.” He stepped closer to you, even his voice smug. “It’s ok, honey.” Joel caressed your hair, burying his fingers into the strands. He pulled your hair, making you look at him. “Nothing wrong with wanting this.”

Joel kissed you, hungry, impatient, devouring.

Then he left, informing you he would have an early night with a wink.

[midnightwriter21]

Sanemi, Shinobu and Obanai x Giyuu little sister reader. Reader 20 and 1 year younger than Giyuu and is the Polar opposite of Jim like she very playful and curious but also very loving to him and he spoils her. She a civilian who owns a tea shop. May I have headcanons with her and those three and Giyuu reaction to each please?

demon slayer hcs: sanemi & shinobu x giyuu's little sister!reader

characters: sanemi, shinobu, giyuu

warnings: mentions of birth control in shinobu's (idek if that needs a warning lol)

AN: pumped this out at 3am lol, ill be doing obanai in another part!

SANEMI

your relationship was such a slow burn lol

when he finds out ur giyuu's sister its an immediate disliking on Sanemi's part

but are we rly surprised?

dude HATES giyuu

you spend a lot of time with the hashira

and you've become good friends with them so you're always around when the hashira are all together

they all adore u

you're sweet, funny, outgoing, confident

basically everything that giyuu isn't lollll

you brought snacks from ur teashop to one of the lil hashira hangouts

and you couldn't help but notice sanemi absolutely stuffing his face full of the ohagi that you brought

but who can blame him?

he might not like you but he never said you were a bad cook

and ohagi is his favorite

a couple days after the lil hangout

sanemi gets back to his estate after a mission and finds a cute lil basket adorned with a bow sitting on his doorstep

he picks it up and looks inside and its full of ohagi

after he goes inside and devours the whole basket

he finds a note at the bottom saying "enjoy <3" signed with your name

thats it right there.

the way to this mans heart is thru his stomach fr

now

when yall are dating dating

you keep it quiet

none of the other hashira know

and giyuu CERTAINLY doesn't know

until one day you're working at your tea shop and sanemi walks in to pick up the lunch that you made him

now me personally... id turn into a professional cook for this man

5 COURSE MEAL FOR EVERY MEAL

anyways

its not a busy day at the shop so he walks into the kitchen to find you cooking

and this man is HANDSY

so ofc he grabs you by your waist and pulls u into him

and starts feeling you up good lord please i want this so bad

you hear the faint 'ding!' of the bell above the front door

but pay it no mind assuming its a customer

and then the kitchen door opens

and everyone freezes

cause standing in the doorway is your older brother

thats the most expressive face sanemi has ever seen on giyuu

dudes eyes are wide as saucers

mouth wide open

shook af

like "dawg don't you hate me and everyone that associates with me?"

like "you have basically cursed my entire bloodline"

"you told me to off myself because im me"

and sanemi is just "i hate you not you're sister"

and goes back to feeling u up totally ignoring giyuu's presence

giyuu basically just moonwalks back out the door

and pretends he never saw any of that

lol i love them XD

SHINOBU

now shinobu liked you from the second she met you

she went to giyuu's estate to get him for a mission

and walks in to find you teasing and mocking tf outta ur older brother lmao

ofc she joins in

throwing in some teasing remarks of her own

poor giyuu lol

she is a frequent visitor to your tea shop

cause instead of making medicinal teas herself, now she can just get you to do it

plus she gets to see her favorite girlllll

now

the way giyuu finds out is too funny

you are in the infirmary at the butterfly mansion

dw ur not injured or sick or anything!!

now...

you're sitting on the bed waiting for shinobu

when giyuu walks in

and he's like "wtf are u doing here"

you're explain your business to ur brother when shinobu walks in looking down at a needle saying

"alright i have your birth control shot! not like you need it... i can't get u pregnant"

she looks up when she hears a 'smack'

and there you are with ur hand slapped to your forehead and a bright red face

giyuu just looks between you and shinobu with a blank face

before he passes clean out

dude hits the floor hard lmao

when he wakes up you give him an explanation

and then u and shinobu tease him for passing out

lol dude can't catch a break

[loupy-mongoose]

This part is long, so I'm banishing it to the Read More zone. XD

PREVIOUS NEXT

ARC START | CHRONO

~~~~~~

Crap...

Akoya roused at the sound of the word. Slowly the events of the previous day replayed in her mind.

It was real...

The blue Mew stretched beside Randy with a sigh. Telepathically she chided him. Careful, Love. Lav was in here when I went to sleep.

She saw his hands lower from his face as he turned his head, looking around. He groaned and sat up. She rolled onto her stomach, noticing the pile of blankets and pillows in the corner. It seemed too flat to be containing the little Mewtwo. Her psychic senses confirmed it.

They were alone.

Randy sat on the edge of the bed for a while. Akoya could sense waves shimmering from him as his mind woke up.

Finally he leaned on an arm, rubbing his face with a drawn out sigh.

His voice was exhausted.

I don't know what I'm going to do, Akoya.

Akoya floated up and leaned her arms on his shoulder.

He knew Mo. I owe it to him to tell him that M... That Mo is... ...gone... Right?

Do you want me to tell him?

He sighed again. ...No... No, I... I think I should... I'll... I'll get there...

Akoya nuzzled his cheek. She wished she could take this from him. So, so badly.

I never expected we'd meet someone who knew Mo... Let alone a human...

I know...

They sat quietly, neither feeling like talking really. Finally, Randy sighed once more and found his cane at the foot of the bed. He grabbed it and stood up.

Well... Guess I better find him and... see if I can start... something...

Akoya, now gripping his shoulder as to not fall, gave him a comforting lick. I'm with you, Love.

He paused for a moment, before lifting his hand and stroking her face gently. She responded with a purr, which brought a smile to her friend's face.

Together they left the room.

~~~~~~

It wasn't long before Randy could hear chatter between Lav and this stranger they'd met yesterday. He sighed again, sure it was far from the last time.

He felt as if his sleep had done him no good. As if he'd fallen out of a nightmare, only to wake back into it.

He followed the voices into the kitchen. There he found Fuji and Lavender preparing something to bake. Cookies, by the look of it. They were obviously having fun together, and he couldn't help smiling a bit at his daughter's joy.

Soon the little Mewtwo turned to him. Randy noticed he could feel her energy waver a bit, but she still had a gleam in her eyes.

Fuji, too, looked at him. Ah, good morning, Akoya, Randall!

Randy partially lifted a hand in a tired greeting. Morning...

The blue Mew hovered off of his shoulder. Good morning!

Fuji's eyes met Randy's, and he felt his blood chill again, remembering what he had to explain. Blinking, he looked away. R-Randy's fine, by the way...

The older man must have noticed his discomfort. He cleared his throat. Well then, Randy, Akoya. Can I make you something to eat? Lav here tells me you don't like cookies, but those aren't the only option! I could whip us up some omelets. I have some Chansey eggs that I can use!

Lav gasped. Chansey egg omelets?? Oooo, I wanna try that!

Randy looked at her, glad to see her that happy finally. You sure? You don't normally like omelets.

I like Chansey eggs~

Randy felt an unexpected wave of emotion sweep through him. The happy squeak in her voice, along with her little smile and the sparks of pure joy in her eyes... He had to fight back tears.

Was it fair to long for those days...?

Alright! You all get comfy. I'll get those ready in a jiffy!

Are you sure you don't mind us being in our Mew fo-- She glanced at Lav. Uh... and Mewtwo... forms, Mr. Fuji?

Fuji smiled at her. Not at all, my dear! Take whatever form you're most comfortable in! I'll clean the table later, if you need to walk on it for whatever reason.

The Lindens and Fuji sat at his table. Randy poked at the omelet in front of him, eyeing the nearby saltshaker.

MmmmmmMMMMM!! This is so GOOD!!

The little Mewtwo shoveled her food into her mouth. Randy chuckled a little at her. Despite the good memories associated, he wasn't much a fan of the flavor of Chansey eggs. Still, nothing a little salt couldn't fix.

Akoya gave him a look as he sprinkled copious amounts of the seasoning on his food. Have a little egg with your salt, Love...

He handed the shaker to her, ignoring her snide remark. You might want some. They're a little sweet.

Akoya thought for a moment, before taking it.

After a short while of them eating, Fuji cleared his throat again. He interlaced his fingers together and placed his hands on the table, a serious expression on his face.

I'm sure you're aware I have questions... And I'm guessing you do too.

Randy locked eyes with the man, suddenly feeling lost for words. Once more, he sighed. A nod of the head was the only response he could muster.

Akoya stepped toward their host on the tabletop. You'll have to forgive our hesitancy, Mr. Fuji. Our answers aren't fun ones. Especially for him. She nodded toward her husband.

Randy smiled to the blue Mew, his heart warmed by her support. He took a deep breath, let it out, and met Fuji's eyes steadily.

Mo...

Mo is gone...

Fuji was still for a moment, before nodding with a sigh of his own. ...Okay... I'm sorry to hear it... If I may ask... If you know... How... How did it happen?

Randy felt a chill go down his back. This was it.

Well... He... He gave up his memories...

Fuji's eyebrows rose before lowering questioningly. His memories?

Randy stood from his chair, feeling the strange heat of Transform envelope his body. In a flash, he was a Mew, floating over the table.

This... This is Mo's body... He took Randy's memories... my memories... To let me live. At least... I think that's what happened... I don't very well remember that moment...

They both went quiet, Mr. Fuji's eyes swimming with this new information.

What was it he saved you from?

...He and I went to destroy some computers... And they exploded... He shuddered, and Akoya floated over to touch his shoulder reassuringly. I... I remember being pinned down... and fire... ... And talking with Mo... I don't remember what was said... But the next thing I remember was waking up in a whole other region.

I spent the next four years believing that, somehow, I had... that Randy had escaped the fire... But he hadn't...

...Not his body, at least...

Fuji sat staring at his clasped hands, his eyes unreadable, before speaking. He voice was soft and full of sympathy. Four years... And obviously you figured out what happened... That must have been a shock.

The three feline Pokemon exchanged glances, reliving the torturous discovery in their minds.

Yeah... Randy nodded, feeling his energy reaching its limit. Yeah... A shock that refuses to dissipate...

The group went silent. Randy let himself come to a rest on the table, the comforting touch of his wife beside him never leaving his side. He struggled to keep his mind blank, afraid that any train of thought could lead him down the wrong path.

Finally, Mr. Fuji let out a sigh and straightened in his seat. His eyes met Randy's exhausted ones. It's clearly taken a toll on you, and I can't say I blame you for that. To be the mind of one being in the body of another... I can't imagine how that must feel... He smiled sadly. If I may... you seem to have done well with his gift.

Randy paused a moment before turning to Akoya, meeting her warm sapphire eyes, and catching Lav's amethyst ones as well.

Done well with his gift...?

He couldn't deny that was at least partially true.

The twins flashed briefly through his mind, warming his heart. He could tell by the smile in her eyes that Akoya was thinking the same.

Yeah...

There was a lot to love in his life...

If only he could feel like he deserved it...

So, it's... Fuji leaned his head on his interlaced fingers. It's safe to say then, that by all means... Mo has passed away.

Randy's mind flooded with a torrent of thoughts from the last five years. Thoughts of the wars waged against his doubt. Times he beat himself up for his stupid actions back then that led to this mess he was in. The battles lost where he ended his day feeling as if he didn't deserve to be alive.

Even now, he wondered... How much was he truly Randall...?

Frozen by the force of the thoughts, he didn't answer.

And as she had so many times, Akoya answered for him.

Yes...

The word was an unexpected stab to his heart.

Mo has passed.

Randy's tried to find his memories, but... He never could.

And he feels like Randy, energy speaking.

Mo isn't there anymore.

Randy looked down, suddenly unable to meet the gentle man's eyes. His head was hurting, and the sweet smell of the baking cookies didn't help.

He hovered off of the table and returned to his human form, startled to feel his legs jolt in protest when he steadied on the floor. He leaned on his cane, his head whirling and pounding.

M-May I go for a walk? I need some fresh air... I need to try to... to sort my thoughts...

Fuji nodded. Of course! I understand... It sound's like a very rough situation to figure out. I don't blame you at all for needing time. If you can wait a moment, I can get you some tea for your walk.

For a second, Randy considered skipping it. But some tea sounded lovely right now... Okay... I'm going to step out to wait, though... These cookies are getting to me.

Akoya floated toward him, coming close to his face. Do you want me to come with you?

Randy shook his head. No... I want to be alone... He gave her a small but genuine smile. I'll be alright. You keep Lav company, okay? He took her tiny hand in his fingers and gave it a gentle kiss.

In return she butted her head against his, purring. Okay. She licked his forehead. I love you, Randy.

I love you too, Akoya.

~~~~~~

PREVIOUS NEXT

ARC START | CHRONO

[southparktexts]

Hi, this is my first time requesting so I’m kinda nervous ngl, but, since I found a spider in my hair and sat on my kitchen crying for ten minutes, I was wondering if you could do main four w/ reader with arachnophobia? No pressure or rush though, just wondering (:

oh my god anon :(( you poor soul, i hope you’re okay now though sweetheart.

Main 4 with a arachnophobic reader

cartman ;

- starting off with him because he is the WORSTT out of all them.

- the main 4 and you were over at his house and you saw a spider on the roof and you were so scared it wasn’t funny.

- stan, kyle were trying to kill it and cartman was just laughing at you.

- after the spider was dead, he would pick the dead spider up and put it in front of your face as you were shaking.

- kyle protected you though.

- after that he sent you multiple spider jumpscare tiktok / reels

- he is so fucked up when he finds out about this.

- one time filled your locker with alive spiders causing you to have a panic attack.

- you’re panicking was so bad that you passed out, having to go to the ER.

- it was from there he kinda realised how you could’ve died and how scared you were.

- he toned it down a little.

- he never apologised but will send you funny spider reels to help you get over your fear.

kenny ;

- okay its no surprise that kenny has poor hygiene.

- i mean he’s poor

- one time you were over at his house, ignoring all the rats when you saw multiple spiders climbing on different walls.

- you, obviously scared, you panicked coming into kenny’s embrace.

- he looked down at you and realised from the night before at cartmans house.

- you had a fear of spiders.

- it was obvious that you had saw the spiders in his room.

- he sighed, rubbing your hair as you shook in fear.

- he grabbed a nearby book, hitting all the spiders he could see and threw the book outside the window.

- holding you with one hand as the other killed the spiders.

- after that day, he definitely came ‘round yours forever.

- it was clear that if you were to come over to his, he would need some bug spray for you.

stan ;

- okay, i know damn well that he already knew this prior.

- like when you first came over on the farm, randy showed you the farm of marijuana and you didn’t touch any in case for spiders.

- from there stan silently kills every spider in his house in case you ever come over.

- he knows from the locker incident that spiders are dangerous. very dangerous. especially you.

- just for you, when you come over to his. he bought you your own bug spray in case you see any spiders in yours / his home.

- he doesn’t really care about your fears

- i mean everyone has fears..

- also will ‘protect’ you from spiders.

- he sprays bug spray on the spider until your satisfied.

- one time he used a whole bottle of bug spray to calm you down and show you it was ‘really dead’

- if you get scared from a spider. he wipes your tears and hold you close.

kyle ;

- i can see kyle already being a clean freak

- especially from that microbiome episode

- he already has bug spray in his room and everywhere in his house.

- although after the locker incident he doubled up on bug spray.

- definitely gives you a bunch of bug spray for you to take home so you don’t panic and pass out again.

- he is your protector.

- he hates spiders as well in my opinion but not as much as you.

- he’ll still kill them or put it outside.

- if you ever start crying again from a spider

- he will hold you close and tight while tilting your head towards the spider as he’s killing it with bug spray.

- if you’re still panicking he’ll sit down , place you on his lap and rock back and forth as he wipes your eyes.

- kisses your forehead platonically, whispering praise

- reassuring you that its dead and making sure your okay before he goes and throws it out.

aaa im so sorry this is so shit im so tireddd 😭 im overworking my lil brain on these xD

reqs are open !!

[the-traveling-poet]

it’s me again, and I’ve found an idea! Okay so, I’d like to request a Levi x lieutenant reader where the reader is sick but she is as stubborn as a mule and every time someone points that out she just brush it off some way, or elude the questions, until she feels so sick she can barely stand, and ask Levi for help? Thank you Lynn! 🤎🤎

Head-Cold

What started off as a slight cough and a runny nose, now consumed your every waking moment in the form of a head-cold. The worse you get, the more your friends and comrades worry for your health. But you’re fine, right? Your stubbornness to be seen by a medic doesn’t go unnoticed by your Captain, who takes matters into his own hands.

Pairing: Levi x Lieutenant!Sick!Reader

Warnings: Language, sick reader, mention of vomit SFW, fluff, xReader

A/N: Love this idea! Seriously tho the “I don’t need help I’m fine” trope that turns into the “Crush has to take care of you” trope? UNDEFEATED. Also this request is ironic cause I’m coming down with a head cold myself xD As always, if this doesn’t meet your expectations, I’ll rewrite whatever you prefer!

Enjoy~🤎

The moment you woke up feeling nauseous, you knew today was gonna be a great day.

Rolling out of your bed with a stuffy groan, you shuffled over to your private bathroom and took a look at yourself in the mirror. Crusty eyes looked back at you from your reflection, and a red nose drew attention to the color in your face, making you look fevered. Placing a hand on your forehead, you could nearly confirm this was the case.

Mumbling incoherently to yourself, you tried your best to clean yourself up before you had to make an appearance for the day. Before leaving your dorm room, you’d gone through at least ten tissues and wiped your face with a damp wash cloth nearly just as many times. With your hair pulled up neatly away from your face and your clothes adjusted properly on your frame, you put on your best ‘I’m fine’ face and strode out into the hall.

Steadying yourself on your feet, you slowly made your way down to breakfast with the others in your regiment, gliding your hand along the wall to keep your ever wobbling balance.

Shit…Light headed, dizzy, nauseous, runny nose…what’s next, a headache?

You entered the hall and found your way to the kitchens to grab a bowl of what appeared to be soup.

Thank god, maybe this’ll help my poor throat…

You scanned the room over with tired eyes and spotted your fellow superiors sat around their usual table. Stifling a yawn, you trudged over and plopped down near Hange and Nanaba.

“Lieutenant Y/N,” Commander Erwin greeted you formally from across the table.

“Mornin’ C’mander,” you replied back in a stuffy tone, rubbing slightly at your nose.

The conversation happening around you paused, but you were too busy suffering to notice until a hand placed itself on your shoulder. Looking over, you spotted Hange giving you a confused look.

“Y/N, dear…Is everything alright?” they asked.

“Yeah, why?” you asked with a raised brow.

“Y/N, you look sick. Are you sure you’re alright?” Nanaba pestered from your other side.

“Sick? Ehh…maybe. Nothin’ I cant handle doe.” You sniffled, your throat feeling worse from trying to talk in a volume they’d be able to hear you in.

“Maybe you should go to the infirmary…You shouldn’t attend to duties today if you’re ill. You’ll just make yourself worse and possibly spread it to someone else!” Hange’s assistant, Moblit, spoke up from the other side of the scientist.

“Nah, I’ve had a lot worse, so therefor I can’t complain. This won’t kill me.” you argued stubbornly, taking a sip of your soup to hopefully help with the aching pain there.

“You’re sick. I smell it on you.”

You looked up to see Mike joining your table, a bowl of soup in his big hands as he sat down across from Nanaba.

“I’ll be fiiiiiine,” you sniffled, ignoring their concern. You’ve dealt with many hardships in life, both physical and mental. A little head cold wouldn’t be your downfall.

Finally giving into your stubbornness, they dropped your case and resumed their previous conversations. You attempted to follow suit as you ate, but a sudden wave of nausea made you set your spoon back down with a nearly inaudible groan. Deciding you couldn’t stomach anymore, you went to stand on shaky legs and discard your bowl.

Normally you’d let one of the others have what you couldn’t eat, but if Mike was right (and his nose always was) about you being sick, you didn’t want to risk infecting anyone else. Ever you were the considerate one, despite your dismissal of your own issues.

Before you could leave the hall, you found Levi walking in with an empty cup in his hand. After refilling it, he sat near Erwin at your table. He caught your gaze, and you were quick to look away shyly.

“You look like shit,” he greeted.

“Mornin’ Levi,” you greeted back, now trying to hold in a sneeze. As Hange eagerly filled him in on your situation, you rolled your eyes and made to leave the mess hall.

Training wasn’t going to be fun…

══════════════════

Only twenty minutes in, and you were sweating like a pig. In order to catch your breath, you’d had to resort to breathing through your mouth since your nose was completely plugged up and runny.

Great. Just great.

Your legs shook and your head spun as you got off the ground for the nth time. Taking several shallow breaths, you closed your eyes for a moment and silently prayed to anything that might be listening that the torture would end soon.

“Oi, Lieutenant.”

You snapped your eyes open with a muffled ‘huh?’ and came face to face with the gaze of a glaring Captain Levi. He was running the training course today. He stood several feet away from you, not wanting to come any closer after all Hange had told him.

“You shouldn’t be out here training, you’ll make yourself worse. Go to the infirmary,” he commanded.

“I’m fine, I’m fine,” you tried to reassure him breathlessly, wiping at your brow and nose.

He sighed, punching the bridge of his nose. “The one time I go easy on a brat and they refuse,” he mumbled to himself.

“That’s an order, L/N. Go.”

“You can’t orber me roun’. I’m a Lieutenan’.” Your stuffy voice was getting worse, paired with the scratching of your throat.

Another frustrated sigh left the Captain, but he really wasn’t in the mood to argue.

“Fine, have it your way. I was just trying to help, but if you want to make yourself worse, be my guest.”

As he started to walk off, you suddenly gasped and held at your mouth.

“Oh gob oh shid,” you mumbled, catching Levi’s attention. He turned back around, only to see you taking off in the opposite direction; a hand over your mouth and stomach.

He grimaced to himself, knowing immediately what was going on.

“Damn brat…”

Not wanting to vomit in front of everyone, you had raced back into HQ, desperately trying to hold down what little breakfast you’d managed to eat earlier. Throwing your dorm room open, you raced to the bathroom and barely made it to your personal bathroom before it all came back up.

You clutched the bowl of your toilet with shaky hands and coughed, grimacing as your throat burned. After brushing your teeth and cleaning up the bathroom, and yourself with a quick shower, you decided to finally take your friend’s advice.

Not to go to the infirmary, but instead to rest. Locked away in your room, you ignored the knocks and muffled voices at your door as you curled up under the blankets on your bed.

It may have been warm outside, but you were freezing. Despite the sweat that clung to your body, you attempted to rest.

══════════════════

What felt like an eternity later, the sound of your door being messed with woke you up out of a deep sleep. Rubbing at your sweaty brow, you groaned as you saw your locked door handle twist.

Your door opened slowly, and with blurry eyes you could make out a head of raven hair. Shuffling under the covers, you looked over your shoulder to see Levi approaching your bed.

“What are you doing?” you mumbled sleepily.

“You missed lunch. And dinner,” he stated quietly, and it was only then you noticed a tray of food in his hands.

“Oh…What time is it?” you yawned, trying your best to cover your mouth and sit up, but the dizziness came back in full force, making you groan and lay back down.

“A little after eight,” he responded, setting the tray down on your bedside table.

“I tried to check up on you earlier, but you must have really been out of it.”

“How did you even get in here this time?” you asked with a raised brow. “I locked the door.”

“I picked the lock,” he stated in a ‘you seriously have to ask?’ tone of voice.

Shooting him a look of disbelief, you shook your head and attempted to sit up again.

“Why are you even in here? I’m sick. You might get sick.” You pointed out, knowing how skittish he was about germs.

With a sigh, he sat on the edge of your bed. “I decided to swallow my pride and make sure you didn’t die in here. Firstly, that’s a lot of paper work for me. Secondly, someone has to help your stubborn ass. Might as well be me.”

“And why’s that?” You pushed for more information, a smile slowly making its way onto your face. Though his face was turned away from you, you could make out a very faint pink hue blooming over his cheeks and the tips of his ears.

“Why not me?” he mumbled.

“Awe, you do care,” you chuckled, voice a little raspy still from sleep and your scratchy throat.

“Shut it, brat. You’re stuffy, and it’s annoying to listen to you talk. The sooner you become less annoying to me, the better.” he grumbled, shooting you a pointed look over his shoulder that didn’t quite reach his eyes.

Starting to understand, you couldn’t help but grin. Maybe he did care a little more than he was trying to let on…

“You wouldn’t have had to hear me talk like this if you hadn’t come in here,” you pointed out teasingly.

He didn’t have a retort for this, so instead he sighed in annoyance and picked up the forgotten tray of food.

“Eat your damn soup already. And take some meds for god’s sake. I grabbed a couple bottles on the way up here.”

Rolling your eyes, you took the tray from him, your fingers lightly brushing against his hands. He stiffened slightly at the contact, but made no comment. Instead, he quietly observed you taking a sip of the warm soup. He refused to tell you, but you could tell this wasn’t something that had been served for dinner. He had to have made this himself.

For you…

“Thanks, Levi. I guess I could maybe use the help.” You smiled at him, scooting a little closer to where he sat.

“Yeah no shit, now eat.” He didn’t move away from you. Instead, he discreetly moved a little closer.

Maybe it wasn’t so bad to ask for help from time to time, you supposed. Especially if being sick meant you got to spend some time with your favorite Captain…

[leilani-lily]

~Oh Deer~ (Chapter 5)

I'll admit, I had this finished a while ago, but couldn't post until now. I have a confession to make... my long term boyfriend of 6 years split with me a couple days ago. And it's been... hard, to say the least. I'm really hoping this wont deter me from continuing to write (especially since this story is kinda romantic, but also isn't? There's deep feelings involved xD) I hope maybe writing can maybe help me as it serves as a distraction? I honestly don't know... All I can ask for is patience as I deal with this. If I find I need a break I'll be sure to let you guys know. But I guess for now, please keep me in your thoughts if you can. Or if anyone wants to swap stories I'm more than happy to share. ꨄ But ok. Enough sadness. This chapter was a joy to write before all the bs happened. I hope it can make you smile! And as always, please feel free to comment your thoughts! SYNOPSIS: AroAce! Alastor x Chef!Singer! Reader. You settle into hotel life, and whip up Alastor's fave dish! But some drama ensues when you get a little too friendly with a certain Spider Demon~ Word Count: 4.4 K Chapter under the cut! ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

You had developed quite a routine here during your time at the hotel, and you certainly found your days a lot busier than you had intended.

Your morning coffee with Alastor that usually blended into breakfast, then joining him in his tower for his broadcasts. He’d always pour two glasses of rye whisky and sit with you, asking for your thoughts afterwards. You’d discuss what you liked and didn’t like, and were surprised to learn he took criticism well (other than the occasional eye twitch). You’d bounce off new topics for future shows together before wrapping up and heading back down to the kitchen for the lunch rush.

After lunch was usually when Charlie would want to round everybody up. Either discussing how to make the hotel more liveable, how to recruit more sinners, or various exercises to improve everyone’s character. Sometimes these meetings were very boring and you’d have to pinch yourself constantly to stay awake. But for the most part they were fun, and you found yourself actually enjoying spending time with everyone. Especially goofing around with Angel and Husk, which usually resulted in Vaggie snapping at you all as you choke back laughter. Sometimes you would catch Alastor watching you with an unreadable expression, but you didn’t think anything of it. 

When that would wrap up, it was time to whip up dinner. You managed to figure out everyone’s favourite foods, and every Friday you decided you’d rotate through and make someone’s special  dish for them. Everyone enjoyed Friday dinners, always trying to guess what everyone liked, make bets on who was next, and were especially pleased if it was their night. It wasn’t much, but their praise always made you secretly feel warm and bubbly inside. 

Finally, after cleaning everything up and ending your shift, you’d have some spare time. Depending on how the day went, you would either read and have a quiet night to yourself, or just completely pass out straight away. 

Before you knew it, a month had flown before your eyes; bringing you into the present.

You knew you had no reason to be so nervous. Angel had loved his lasagna dish last week, and previously Charlie loved the pizza you had made (even if others had picked off the pineapple in disgust). You had proven you were a good chef since working here. But this Friday meal in particular… this one was different. It was Alastor’s. Your closest friend. And you knew just how important this particular meal was. It wasn’t just a dish, it was a memory. A way to remember his mother, and you had learned very quickly just how much she meant to him. 

Your heart was fluttering nervously as you put the jambalaya out on the large dining table. No one was there yet, but you could hear the chitter of excited demons coming closer to you, so you knew they were on their way. You always tried to make Friday’s dinner special, it was the one meal where you all sat and ate together. Kind of like a little family. You couldn’t help but smile to yourself, your heart fluttering warmly at the thought. You went back to the kitchen to grab the cheddar biscuits, your mind wandering back to Alastor. You shouldn't be overthinking this, it’s just a stupid dinner. Did his opinion really matter that much to you?

You re-enter the dining room, and your eyes immediately locked with the demon in question. Alastor’s smile seemed to brighten the moment he saw you, but his smile only made your hands sweaty.

…… Yes, yes his opinion really did matter that much. You really wanted to make a good impression. 

“Ooooh and ya baked fresh biscuits??” Angel had zipped up beside you, eyeing the plate of goodies in your hands, “ya really know how ta spoil a demon Baby Cakes!” His fingers danced over a biscuit, causing you to snap out of your hold with Alastor and give Angel a quick slap on the wrist. He zipped his hand away in mock horror, making you snort a moment.

“You know the rules; no eating ‘till everyone’s here,” You scold him, but you can’t help but smile; you could never really be angry with him. Angel groaned dramatically, hugging himself with his four arms.

“You’re a cruel mistress y/n; makin’ a cutie like me practically starve to death! Jus’ look at me! I’m witherin’ away!” he leans up against you, arching his back as his full weight pressed on you. You let out a single laugh as you tried to maintain your hold on the plate and not fall over. He continued to groan weakly as his one arm grasped the air above him and another flopped over his eyes. 

Wow. Someone give this guy an award. No wonder he was in show business. 

You laugh again at the dramatics and roll your eyes. Finally, you sighed and grabbed a biscuit, offering it to the Spider Demon. Angel peeked over and immediately lit up, grabbed it eagerly before standing up straight, miraculously recovering from his ‘near death’. He took a deep whiff of the warm bread before smiling back at you. 

“Yarra real doll toots~” he gives you a flirty wink to which you shake your head in amusement. Always the charmer this one. 

“Yeah yeah, well, just don’t tell the others. Or else they might think you’re my favourite~!” You swing your hips to him and give him a playful hip bump, winking right back. He laughed as the nudge pushed him to the side, using the momentum to walk to his seat. But as he sauntered away, he looked back and grinned mischievously.

“Well maybe they should~!” he called back, doing a little suggestive shoulder shimmy and wiggling his eyebrows. You couldn’t help your snort. Cheeky thing. 

You knew it was all in good fun; teasing and play-flirting had become your thing. He was like the gal-pal you had never had since coming to Hell, and you could tell he was happy to have a girlie here at the hotel. You knew his real bestie was some demon named Cherri (which he INSISTED you all had to go out one night), but having another chica just a couple rooms down from his own was fun and convenient. And you were happy to be that friend for him if it meant slumber parties and beauty routines. 

You felt someone’s eyes on you, and you snapped out of your bubbly thoughts. Alastor was standing in the same spot he was before, not having moved an inch. He was still smiling, but this time it felt a little more strained. More forced. And his eye twitched ever so slightly. You also noticed his grip tight around his microphone. He caught you looking at him and immediately turned away, beginning to walk back to his seat with an unreadable expression. 

… That was weird. 

Before you could even begin to process, the rest of the gang entered the room. They all gave you a greeting in their own quirky ways as they arrived and made their way to their seats. Angel shoved the rest of the biscuit into his mouth to hide any evidence and happily trotted over to Husk. You smiled happily at the arrival of your comrades and set the tray of bread down on the table. Everyone looked at the spread before them and chittered excitedly, impressed with the effort you had put into tonight’s dinner. 

As everyone sat down, you quickly made your way to your seat beside Angel. Before sitting down, you cleared your throat a moment to get everyone’s attention. As the happy chatter died down, you began to speak.

“First off, I’d like to thank everyone for joining in today’s special dinner. Today’s meal is inspired by our very own Facility Manager, Alastor.” Everyone clapped politely and Charlie even gave a small whoop of encouragement. Alastor sat up proudly from his seat at the head of the table, loving the attention he was getting. 

“I’ll admit, I was a bit intimidated with tackling this particular dish, as we’ve all heard him boast about his mother’s recipe.” There were a couple chuckles scattered around the table, everyone very aware of how much he spoke of it. Husk in particular rolled his eyes and muttered quietly in disdain.

“I realize I’ll probably never meet up to her standards,” you look back at Alastor and give a sheepish smile, “but I sincerely hope it’s to your liking.” Alastors smile widened ever so slightly, his hooded gaze softening at your words. 

“My dear,” he marveled, his eyes never leaving yours, “the fact that you were kind enough to take the time to prepare it with me in mind already makes it wonderful.” You felt your hand press up to your chest, your fist curling up tightly near your heart. Alastor always knew what to say to make you feel better. He could be really gentle when he wanted to be. 

“Yea, and not only for ol’ Smiles ‘ere,” Angel spoke up, making you look down at him, “But you’ve made some bitchin’ good meals fer all of us.” he gestured to the crowd, gaining various murmurs of agreement and praise. You looked at everyone and their smiling faces and could feel your chest tightening. 

“Seriously, Sugar, ya freakin’ amazing.” Angel continued, giving you a warm smile. He suddenly grabbed onto his glass and raised it high, giving everyone a cocky grin. “Let’s hear it for y/n ya filthy sinnars!” 

Before you could comprehend, everyone had raised their glasses and gave a cheer of encouragement. You looked out to everyone and their genuine happiness and support, at a loss for words. You had organized all of this simply because you wanted to, but you had to admit, being recognised felt really good. A warmth began to spread into your chest, and a lump formed in your throat. 

It… wow, it had been so long since you’ve had friends like this.

You did your best to blink back tears at the gesture, not expecting to get so emotional over all of this. As you took a moment to acknowledge everyone, your gaze finally turned to Alastor. 

Oddly enough, he wasn’t looking at you, but he was looking at Angel. His eyebrows were tight as his grin stretched in an uncomfortable smile. You could tell he felt your gaze, cause soon his eyes flicked up to you, catching you watching him. In the blink of an eye, his expression softened as he grabbed his own glass, raising it high and giving you a heartening look. You shook the strange feeling from before and smiled back at him, grateful for his appreciation. 

The excitement settled down as everyone started serving themselves, the smell of the cooking becoming too much for everyone to ignore. You finally sat in your chair and reached out for Angel’s hand. The Spider Demon looked to you in surprise for a moment, taking in your smiling face.

“That was really sweet of you to say Angel,” you whispered, your grip on him tightening for a moment. You could feel yourself choking up again. “Seriously… Thank you.” Angel's face softened as he twisted his hand so it could grip on to yours. He began to open his mouth to respond.

In a mere moment, you could feel your chair lurch backwards, a panicked yelp escaping your throat as your hand was ripped out of Angel’s. Everyone immediately stopped what they were doing, looking at you in surprise. Angel turned in his seat and looked at you stupidly.

“... What the fuc-?”

Angel didn’t even get a chance to finish his statement as suddenly everyone chairs in your row shifted to the right, causing everyone to cry out and grip onto their seats in fear. Everyone on the other side of the table looked on in disbelief as their friends were shuffled around. 

To your surprise, while everyone shifted right, you slid to your left at lightning speed, the chair scraping loudly on the wooden floor. You suddenly jolted to a stop, and you held on for dear life at the force in which you were moving. Before you could recover, your chair lurched forward, propelling you back to the table and new place setting.

… Right next to Alastor.

You gasped in surprise, your heart racing in shock as you felt your knuckles turning white from gripping the seat so hard. You noticed something flicker beneath you, and your eyes managed to catch something. A shadow with a familiar Cheshire grin shimmied away from the feet of your chair before melting into the shade of the table. 

Your head whipped up to Alastor in disbelief. The Radio Demon had just finished serving himself jambalaya, not even looking in your direction as he tapped the serving spoon against his plate. With a cool expression, he turned his head to you and tilted his head to the side, as if nothing had happened.

“... Jambalaya~?” He pointed the spoon to the pot and looked at you expectantly.

Everyone stared for a moment, the room eerily quiet.

“.......... Alastor what the actual FUCK was that?!” Angel suddenly exploded, clearly very upset that his bestie was now 2 chairs away from him. Everyone else in your row nodded in agreement, perplexed at the sudden change in seating. Alastor didn't turn his head, nor look at Angel. The Radio Demon simply took your plate and began serving you the ride dish, his expression surprisingly calm and attention only on you.

“Just say when dear~”

Your eyes darted from Alastor to Angel, unsure of what to even do or say. Angel’s face scrunched up into a scowl, clearly displeased with being ignored.

“Hey! Freaky Face! I’m talkin’ to ya!” he growled, his hands tightening into fists. Alastor continued to ignore the spider, continuing to serve you as if it was just the two of you in the room. 

“My my, hungry now are we y/n dearest~?” Alastor grinned cheekily. You were still so dumbstruck, your gaze finally fell to your plate and you quickly realized just how full it was getting. Awkwardly looking between Angel and Alastor, you softly murmured a 'w-when'. Alastor gave a hum of approval and tapped the spoon on your plate before setting it back down in front of you. 

“Hah, ok Asshole. I see how it is.” Angel chuckled darkly to himself, “I get it. Ya just hate ta see anyone else gettin’ cozy with our little chef. I’ll admit, I didn’t take ya for the jealous type.”

That seemed to catch Alastors attention.

It was only for a moment, and only you were able to catch it sitting so close to him. But you noticed the Radio Demon’s pupils flash, and his one eyelid twitch as his smile grew dangerously wide. But in an instant, Alastor calmed his expression and was back to his suave self. Taking a breath, he finally turned his head to Angel.

“Oh please.” He drawled, his eyes looking at him with boredom, “I simply figured it only made sense for our wonderful chef to sit next to the demon who inspired tonight’s dish. Wouldn’t you agree y/n~?” He turned his head to you and slowly leaned in, giving you a pleasant smile. You felt your heart leap at suddenly being caught off guard, unsure of what to say.

“I, ah, well-!” 

Everyone's eyes were on you, and you suddenly felt very self conscious. Being put on the spot like this, and feeling as if you had to choose between your two friends, it was becoming very overwhelming. Unbeknownst to you, Charlie looked at you with such pity, and felt her own blood begin to boil at the situation these men put you in. Placing her hands on the table, the Princess of Hell rose from her chair, her face suddenly very authoritative.

“Both of you need to stop this nonsense.” She stated, looking down at both Angel and Alastor disapprovingly. “Y/n put a lot of effort into making this dinner special; and I won't allow you to ruin it over something so petty!” She continued to glare at them judgingly before turning her attention to you, giving you a quick comforting smile and nod. You felt your shoulders relax and smile back at her, feeling grateful for her support. She really was growing into her royal title. 

Angel had his arms crossed and was clearly still pissed, but there was a mix of shame in his eyes after being called out. Alastor’s face remained surprisingly calm, turning to look over at you. He noticed your posture and expression, his eyes calculating as he assessed the situation. Finally he turned back to the table.

“Our Princess is right of course~!” He smiled, lifting a hand and placing it on your shoulder, “I would hate for all of dear y/n’s efforts to be neglected. She has worked so hard; let us forget about all this nonsense and enjoy this wonderful meal~!” His eyes slid to Angels and gave him a hard stare. The Spider demon glared right back, his jaw tight and eyes furrowed with hatred. But after glancing at both you and Charlie, and seeing your faces, he finally grumbled in defeat. With a huff, Angel reached for another cheddar biscuit and slouched in his seat, ending the feud.  

You finally released the breath you were holding as everyone shrugged their shoulders and returned their focus to their plates. You felt Alastors grip on your shoulder tighten for a moment, making you turn to him. 

“Are you quite alright my dear?” He asked, an eyebrow raised in question. Despite the calm look on his face, you knew he wouldn't be asking if he wasn't genuinely concerned. You sighed and felt a smile spread across your face, giving his hand a pat in reassurance. 

“Yeah, I’m ok Al,” you started, beginning to shake your head and grin as you thought about the shenanigans he pulled earlier. “But seriously, there’s no need to be so jealous. If you want to sit beside me, just say so.” You looked up to him playfully, your previously conflicted emotions melting away. Alastor stared at you for a moment, his eye’s lidded and giving you a blank stare before turning to his plate. Removing his hand from your shoulder, he picked up his utensils and was suddenly very focused on his meal.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about y/n~” he replied. He scooped up a spoonful of rice and shrimp. You could feel your eyes crinkling as you watched him knowingly.

“Uh huh~” you smirk. 

The Radio Demon ignored you and took his first bit of jambalaya. Your grin slowly began to fall as you watched him pull the spoon out from his lips, your previous nerves from earlier settling in again. You watched his expression with baited breath as he tasted your cooking. 

His appearance didn’t change much; his eyes looking down at the food beneath him, eyes flickering over the plate. After a moment, his eyelids sank down closed as he continued to chew, allowing all of his senses to focus on the flavor. You could feel your leg begin to jiggle anxiously; seriously it was sad how badly you wanted this man’s approval. 

The demon lifted his head and gulped his mouthful down, eyes still closed and lips in a small pressed smile. You held your breath as you waited for his verdict. Alastor’s smile grew wider as he lowered his head back to the plate, opening his eyes and looking fondly at the dish below him. 

“Well well~” he chuckled, finally turning his head to you and giving you an impressed look, “I have to admit, this is as close as anyone has ever gotten.” 

You felt your heart stop.

Is he shitting you right now?

“Of course,” he continued, scooping another spoonful and inspecting it, “it is missing a few things; she’d usually add sausage as well, and probably a bit more spice to it.” he looked fond for a moment, seeming to reminisce to days gone by.

“Nevertheless, it does still taste like home~” He took another bite and once again closed his eyes, savoring the flavors. 

You felt lighter than a feather. 

Of course you knew you’d never get it exactly right. But holy crap you were so relieved that it met his expectations. You were so giddy you had to bite your lip to prevent yourself from squealing, practically doing a little happy dance in your chair. Satisfied with Alastors response, you grabbed onto your own spoon and began to happily dig in.

You were so carefree in your own little world, you didn’t even notice Alastor sneaking a glance at you. Or how his lips curled up ever so slightly at your antics before turning back to his plate. 

The rest of the evening went on without a hitch. Everyone gorged themselves until they were ready to burst, and complimented you on such a flavorful meal. You were so flustered with all the praise; despite the little quarrel that had happened earlier, you couldn’t have been more pleased with how the night went. And you felt more confident with your cooking now that you had Alastor’s official stamp of approval.

The group of demons eventually began to trickle out of the room, ready to immediately flop onto the closest comfortable furniture they could find. You giggled at their behavior and wished you could do the same, but you still had to clean up before you could clock off work. With a final stretch, you turn back to the table and are surprised to see Alastor still in his chair, leaning back comfortably and eyes closed.

“Truly a wonderful evening y/n dearest,” he sighed, opening a single eye to look at you, “There’s something about dining with a group of folks that brings out a certain camaraderie, don’t you think~?” You sighed happily as you approached the table.

“Honestly, it was something I had forgotten I had missed since coming to Hell,” you smiled, beginning to stack the plates and collecting utensils. “I’m just happy to do my part in getting demons to open up more and earn everyone’s trust.”

Alastor said nothing in return, simply watching you as you accumulated the dirty dishes. His eyebrow quirked up before he finally raised his hand and snapped his fingers. Shadows emerged from under the table, making you gasp and almost drop your stack of plates. The same shaded goons from your first week at the hotel appeared beside you and began collecting all the dishes. You begin to tumble over words of protests, but they didn’t pay attention to you as they continued to clean, one even grabbing the stack in your hands and waddling to the kitchen.

“Alastor!” you laugh, turning to him in bewilderment, “Call your minions off; seriously I can clean all of this up myself.” But the Radio Demon merely waved a hand to you as he rose from his seat.

“Don’t bother arguing with me my dear,” he sassed, “You’ve done more than enough tonight; consider this my way of thanking you for a marvelous feast.” 

You sighed at him, slightly annoyed. But you had to admit, you were grateful for his help. Today had surprisingly taken its toll on you, physically and emotionally, and you were so tired from it all. You smiled up at him, rocking back and forth on your feet sheepishly.

“... Thank you Al. Honestly.” you paused for a moment, thinking about everything he had done for you in the month you’d been here. And asking for nothing in return. It was out of character for him.

“I just…” you sighed, making Alastor tilt his head quizzically to you. “I just want to say I’m thankful for everything you’ve done for me. You gave me this job, helped me settle in and feel comfortable, and because of it all I even got to make new friends…” You saw Alastors eyes narrow for a moment and you had to bite back the knowing grin. You cleared your throat and continued.

“But I hope you know,” you hummed, “that I’ll always consider you my first real friend down here. And that I’m really grateful to have been given this chance to get close to you.”

Alastor looked at you long and hard for a moment, the air between you calm and quiet. His static sound shuffled for a second before he finally straightened his back and stood taller, his lips pressed together into a large smile. The red demon glided over to you, and softly patted your head, shaking his head in amusement.

“Ohhh y/n, y/n, y/n,” he sighed, opening his eyes and quirking an eyebrow, “I do often wonder how someone like yourself ended up down here.” Now it was your turn to cock an eyebrow as you gave him a cheeky smile.

“Al, you know exactly how I got down here.”

“Ah, that’s right.” A chuckle escaped his lips, and you knew for a fact he still found your death thoroughly entertaining. “By the way, you didn’t happen to sneak anything into our meal today, now did you~?” He gave you an impish grin. You burst out laughing.

“You asshole!” you guffawed, shoving his hand on your head away playfully, to which the demon snickered evilly. As your laughter simmered down, looked at you a moment before tilting his head up, eyes closed.

“I still stand by my previous statement,” he mused. “The type of folks in this realm are not worthy of such kindness. You should be careful as to whom you trust around here.” He opened his eyes, and his crimson gaze fell to yours. His expression shifted into a serious one at his last statement, making your grin falter for a moment. But only for a moment. 

“Well, it’s a good thing I have you around then, isn’t it?” You smiled, taking a step towards him.

Alastors gaze widened a moment, his eyes flickering over your face. It wasn’t often that you caught the Radio Demon off guard, but the rare moments when you did, you couldn’t help but feel a little pride. Finally, Alastor began to chuckle, shaking his head at you again. After taking a breath, he looked back down at you, a surprising fondness donning his face.

“Hmmm, I suppose it is~”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

..... Alastor doesn't like to share ¬‿¬ Fun fact: Angel like's to give you food-related nicknames. Baby Cakes, Sugar, Puddin', Honey Bunz, ect.

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[lemons4sircroc]

this fanart is killing me XD! I listened to “Naked” by Doja Cat while writing this fic, I highly recommend doing the same while reading ;)

Counter (Sanji x FemReader)

Tags: NSFW || 18+ only! / Sanji x FemReader

************************************************

You woke up drenched in sweat. The air was so thick. You felt the humidity press down on your skin.

The whole crew had gone to bed with no energy to deal with the heat. You headed down to the kitchen to get a glass of water to ease your quench. As you were going down, you noticed that the light in kitchen was still turned on and you could hear noises. 'Is Luffy sleep walking again?' you asked yourself but once you finally entered the room, you saw Sanji washing the dishes.

He was humming a tune and smoking his cigarette while scrubbing off the crumbs left on the plates from before the battle. No one had taken care of the dishes since then. You stood in the middle of the kitchen waiting for him to notice you, but he was in the zone. You approached the tall cook and he suddenly felt your presence.

He turned around, ready to kick the person standing behind him. "Luffy I told you no more food after we all go to bed! Oh, Y/N-Swaaaaan! What are you doing here my mademoiselle? Do you want some food? Or perhaps tea?" Sanji said grabbing a hold of your hand after realizing you were not Luffy trying to get a snack. "Oh no, don't worry. I just came to grab some water. Do you need help?" you asked pointing at the immense pile of plates and cooking pots.

"No! A lady should never get her hands dirty. Please, allow me to serve you your water." You knew there was no point in insisting so you just nodded your head and Sanji brought your water in a flash.

As you were enjoying your cool water, Sanji got back to cleaning. His shirt was unbuttoned and he had left his tie on the kitchen island. No one could withstand the climate you had entered on the sea. Sanji stopped and wiped his forehead, the heat clearly making it hard for him to keep up.

You couldn't stand seeing him like this. You walked up to a cupboard while he was busy and grabbed a cup to fill it with water. You went next to Sanji and swung your hips to push him away from the sink. "Here. Now leave the rest to me. And if you say no, I'll beat you up. Take a break." you said sternly, handing the water to him. He relaxed his expression and gave in. You continued washing the dishes, eyeing Sanji once in a while to make sure he drank his water.

The dishes were done and now you had to dry them, but you needed a break. Your back was aching from standing. You sat on the counter and grabbed a rag. "Can you put the dishes that I am drying away?" you asked Sanji. "Of course mademoiselle!" Sanji said with heart shaped eyes. You continued with the task at hand. He lit a new cigarette right before and placed it between his lips.

Waiting to hand him the last dish, you reached for his cigarette and took a drag. Sanji grabbed the dish in your other hand and to allow him access to the cupboard underneath you, you parted your legs. He crouched down to rise back up and let out a sigh of relief seeing that the kitchen was finally clean. He watched you bring the cigarette resting between your fingers up to your lips for a second puff. He was between your legs and stayed in that position.

Just before you brought your hand back down, he grabbed your hand and gently brought the tip of the cigarette to his lips, taking a long drag, not letting you go. His eyes were closed and his hair was a mess. His other arm went next to your right thigh. You had butterflies in your stomach from his hand caressing yours as he finally let go of it.

He kept his eyes closed, head down and let the smoke out. You saw a drop of sweat trickle from his forehead to his cheekbone so you reached over to wipe it away. As your hand lingered on his face, Sanji looked up and you stayed in this moment, frozen. His eyes were not showing the same emotion as whenever he saw girls, it was deeper than that. You both could feel it. Tension was building in the close space between your bodies.

Sanji quickly grabbed the cigarette that you had kept in your left hand and crushed it in the ashtray that was next to the sink. You followed his swift motion with your head. He returned to you and grabbed your face to bring it in for a kiss. You didn't pull away, you kissed him back. Your hands reached in his opened shirt, grabbing his sides to pull him closer to you.

You felt lacerations on his side and you pulled away to look at them. They were scars from the battle you had previously fought. Protecting you from a pirate, Sanji received some horrible hits. Sanji lifted your chin, bringing your mind back to the present. "Hey don't worry...I'll always protect you, no matter what happens to me." he whispered. "What if you get...you know?" "It's impossible, I can't leave earth knowing you're still alive. Who will protect you?" you chuckled. He pulled you in for another kiss.

Things got heated; he lifted your shirt above your head and then unclamped your bra. He took a break to admire the view in front of him. You could see that he was struggling to keep his composure. Normally, he would have passed out on the floor with blood gushing from his nostrils, but right now he was cool. Or so it seemed. His breath was shaky but he didn't want to waste time, as if you would disappear at any given moment...He wanted to enjoy the moment. You could see his buldge growing bigger and bigger through his black pants.

He left trails of kisses from your neck to your cleavage to your lower abdomen and stopping right at your shorts. He was kneeling at this point. You knew what was coming next so you lifted your lower body to help Sanji removed your remaining clothes.

Your legs resting on his muscular shoulders, he nibbled on your inner thighs and the tingling sensation you felt building only intensified the closer he got. He arrived at your entrance and gulped before looking up to you. You simply nodded, letting him know it was okay to go on.

With his hand, he parted your labia to expose your clit. He kissed it lightly at first to ease in the waters, but rapidly, his masterful skills took over and you were left clutching the edge of the counter and Sanji's hair, your head rolling back. As you moaned his name, you could feel him smile down there. He took so much joy in hearing you say his name as seductively as you were. He had no need to penetrate his fingers inside of you because he knew what he was doing. The only man you had been with to know how to please a woman.

You reached your climax fast, your juices dripping on Sanji's chin. He stood up and wiped his face before grabbing you and pulling you into a kiss. You reached his pants and pulled away to help you take them off. You noticed a wet spot, meaning he came as well. That only aroused you even more. Sanji beat you to his belt and dropped his pants and briefs to his ankles, letting his cock free. It was huge. Bigger than you could have ever imagined. That scared you, but in a good way.

You were about to get down from the counter to give him a taste of your own skills but he stopped you. "Y/N I can't wait..O-Oh...fuuuck!" Sanji moaned as you had seized this moment of vulnerability to spit in your hand and give him a handjob. He had his forehead on yours and was looking down to see you work your magic, his mouth agape with incredulity. Nothing could ruin this moment...except for this.

You heard mumbling and someone walking down the stairs. "M...M" Sanji and you both froze, your hand still on Sanji's cock. The person came down and was now in the kitchen. "M...Meat! Meat." It was Luffy. He was sleep walking again. He headed straight to the fridge and grabbed a couple of chicken thighs left from dinner. Sanji followed him with his eyes full of anger, fighting the urge to not go over there and kick Luffy. You grabbed Sanji by his shirt collar to make him focus on you. Finally Luffy went back up, having no idea what was happening next to him.

Once you confirmed Luffy was back in the boys dorm room by the sound of shuffling feet above you, you grabbed Sanji by the face and pulled him in for a long kiss. "You will scold him tomorrow, for now, I want you." you said spreading your legs further apart. Sanji was now flustered, fighting to not pass out. He lifted your legs by placing his hands under your knees and pulled you closer to the edge to perfectly align himself.

His eyes got lost on your breasts bouncing from the movement, but you snapped him back to reality by moaning out of frustration. He introduced his member in your entrance watching you wince with delight. Once you were used to his growth, he picked up his pace. You were already out of breath, but this got you rolling.

Sanji treated sex like cooking a dish. It was a piece of art that was so intricate, it required the most delicates of movements but with enough power to produce perfection. And that's exactly what you felt. Your walls were eating away at the scene. "Oh Sanji!" you cried from this intense feeling carrying you above clouds.

He grabbed you by the neck to bring you in for a kiss. This passionate kiss you shared was enough to send you to the moon, and you released, your wall tightening around his cock. Your back fell back. Sanji held on to your hips and pulled you closer to him "Y-Y/N..Shit! Fuck fuck!" He squeezed your hips as he released out. Your back was completely flat on the counter, only your legs were still up. Sanji fell on top of you, kissing the crook of your neck.

"Don't go away, this was just an amuse-bouche mon amour." Sanji whispered as he lifted you up to bring you somewhere else.

[anthurak]

WIP - True Child of Two Worlds

Thought I'd throw up a snippet from the in-progress chapter of my Titan Luz fic that I've had particular fun with.

As for context; remember that time Luz looked at Eda storing a ridiculous among of knickknacks and junk in her hair and said "I wish someday my hair can do that"?

Wellll...

---

“Alright, move aside! I’ll be the judge of this,” King declared before scurrying up Luz’s leg and back.

“You uh, need any help King…?” Luz started to ask but by that point the young titan had already vanished into her newly-voluminous hair.

A silence both pensive and awkward fell on the kitchen as nobody was quite sure what to expect. Then…

“HOT BELGIAN WAFFLES, it’s so CLEAN in here!” came King’s muffled yell from Luz’s hair.

Luz couldn’t help breaking out into giggles and chuckles while Amity let out a confused “…Clean?” with a similarly curious raised eyebrow.

Eda meanwhile, was looking a BIT offended.

“Luz,” King’s head poked out of Luz’s hair over her shoulder, “promise me you won’t be like Eda and actually try to keep this place tidy?”

“HEY!” Eda let out a now quite offended squawk, “What’s THAT supposed to mean?!”

“I can promise I won’t stash food in there,” Luz answered her little brother while seemingly ignoring Eda.

“Oh that’s a GREAT start!” replied a clearly relieved King before ducking back into Luz’s hair, “And it’s so ROOMY too!”

“…are you saying Luz’s hair is bigger than mine?” Eda was now sounding quite offended and indignant.

“No,” King’s head poked back out to glare at Eda, “I’m saying hers isn’t packed full of trash and useless junk!”

“That’s it! You are groun-”

“Eda,” Raine’s voice interrupted Eda, the bard having wandered in at some point and now standing at their girlfriend’s side with a rather cross look complete with crossed arms, “what’s this about your hair being ‘packed full of trash’?”

“Uhh…” Eda blinked very uneasily, all previous indignation instantly forgotten, “I mean… it’s not as bad as it used to-aak!” Eda let out another squawk as her lover’s hand darted into her hair and began feeling around… before pulling out a fairly worn pizza box.

“Oh hey, Papa ‘Pellizeri’s! That takes me back,” Luz’s face lit up with nostalgia, “man that place has been shut down for years…” 

“Uh huh,” Raine nodded at the telling indicator of time while Eda managed a VERY awkward and uneasy smile, “Eda, we’re cleaning out your hair pocket.”

For a brief moment, Eda looked like she wanted to object, but quickly thought better of it, “Yeah, okay.”

“Oooooh,” Luz let out an awed breath, “we’ve never gotten Eda to clean her hair out…”

“Yay!” King let out a triumphant squeak as he dropped out of Luz’s hair, “Thank you new mom! Or, dad?” King paused as he awkwardly tried to parse out what was the appropriate term for his mom’s partner, “…Dadmom?”

“You know…” Raine gave a thoughtful smile to who was clearly soon to be their new adopted son, “I think I’m partial to ‘Dad’, if that’s okay with you.”

“Yay! Thank you new-dad!”

--

I'm pretty sure the first three or so chapters of this fic can be summed up as 'various wacky shenanigans related to learning about Human-Titan Hybrid physiology' XD

[natasha-in-space]

Hi Natasha!! I feel like I disappeared and just... never came back lol

Though I'm here to request! This time for Saeran :o

Seeing as I'm planning on starting Ray route soon, could we have a story about Saeran finally being able to confide within you after ages of ignoring his own feelings? I'd imagine that the MC would pry it out of him after noticing he's been acting odd lately. You could take a school setting or canon setting; whatevers easier!

Or, if that doesn't make sense, you could write something about Ray breaking down over feeling helpless; where he thinks that he doesn't do enough/isn't enough for MC.

Or... you could combine the two ideas and write the whole story about Saeran.

SO sorry if this confused you. Ignore it if it did! its completely fine :3

Hi-Hi, lovely to see you back!! <3 I decided to go with SE Saeran for this one, both because I'm currently in my SE Saeran brainrot and because this seems fitting for him. Good luck on your Ray route playthrough! Make sure to have lots of tissues nearby, because you're about to go on a very wild ride of emotions. Also, for future notice, my name's Mia! Natasha is the name of my OC (dw it's kinda a common thing with my url but I don't wanna change it at this point xD)

"...We all know that something is wrong, you know."

Saeran doesn't pay attention to you while you carefully make your presence known by shuffles of your feet against the floor. You are aware that he heard you. He just doesn't say nor do anything to show it. And that worries you.

Saeran was always the quiet, closed-off type. Not like you could blame him, considering all he had to go through. Similar to a feral cat, you've always respected his silent need for space and freedom. If he wanted to talk, he would talk. If he had a desire to spend time with you, he would approach you on his own. You simply demonstrated your desire to be close to him, so that he would know that you wanted him near you.

But... Even you could sense that something wasn't right today. Saeyoung felt it almost immediately, whether it was thanks to their inherent twin connection or his natural tendency to worry about his younger brother. However, just because Saeyoung knew something was wrong doesn't mean he can do anything about it, unless Saeran openly allows him to.

And he was definitely not doing that.

You had to rush down to the kitchen because you heard the sound of glass breaking, and then Saeran shouting. Upon your arrival, the younger twin had already left the room, only giving you a quick unfocused glance before pushing past you. Thankfully, no one was hurt. You talked with Saeyoung in hushed voices as you both cleaned up the broken shards, offering him some comfort in the process. Although you were concerned about Saeran, Saeyoung was equally important to you. Whenever those kinds of incidents happened, his well-being was just as important. Even if he often refuses to acknowledge it.

It seems that Saeran must have cut himself while preparing dinner, and somehow, this turned into an outburst once Saeyoung became worried and tried to help. Both of you acknowledged that there is a deeper issue at play here. Something underlying right under the surface. And it was probably something very unpleasant.

In the end, you both agreed to have you go and attempt to speak with Saeran. Since you weren't present during the entire scene. So, now here you were, silently standing over the younger twin as he sat on the couch, his back turned to you. It hurt your heart to see him hunched over like that, almost like he was curling in on himself. The position didn't appear to be comfortable to be in.

"Saeran, please... tell me what's wrong. I can see you are in pain." Your voice is soft and quiet. You don't want to accidentally push him away. You slowly take a seat on the edge of the couch, a small distance away from him to give him space to breathe and not get overwhelmed.

He shifts ever so slightly, a jerky movement leaving him with a shaky breath. It was probably supposed to be a huff, but it was far too weak to sound like one.

"...I'm fine."

You sigh. "You're not. Look... You don't have to tell me everything, ok? But, I can see that you are in pain, and I want to help you. So... just tell me what you need. I won't ask for anything more."

That seemed to reassure him just a little bit, judging by the way his shoulders lowered, and he paused, possibly thinking over your request. You didn't say anything, only allowing him to do this at his own pace.

At last, there was a reply.

But instead of verbalizing, he just shifts to sit up on the couch and turns over to you. He doesn't look at you, but quietly pulls out his hand and shows it to you. His palm is caked with relatively fresh blood, a decently sized cut being the source of the red substance painting over his skin. It wasn't anything serious by any means, but it sure looked painful.

However... something told you it wasn't the cut that bothered him. Saeran refused to examine his hand. His head was turned away, and his red bangs were falling over his eyes, making it difficult for you to see his face. But, his lips were pressed together into a thin, tense line. You also couldn't help but notice the ungodly tremble in his hands. They were shaking violently. In a way that clearly showed distress without saying a word.

You carefully grasped his wrist, inspecting the cut. Most of the bloody mess was caused by him smearing the blood over his palm, and it didn't seem as bad as you thought at first. Gently rubbing your thumb over his wrist, you pulled away. "I'll clean it up for you, ok? Just wait here."

He didn't respond, but he did give you a brief nod. You now have all the green light you needed.

Saeran hadn't said a word to you until you wrapped a clean gauze over his palm and gently patted his arm to let him know that you were done. The cautiousness with which he turned to look at his hand was unmistakable. Almost like he was sure he'll see something utterly horrifying in its place. The shaky sigh of relief he did let out, though, made you smile. He flexed his hand a bit and turned it around to look over it fully.

"...Thank you."

The murmur was both quiet and soft. Genuine. His mint eyes were filled with earnest gratitude when he looked at you, and that was all you needed. You merely smiled, giving him a nod. "Of course. Do you feel better now?"

Another nod.

"That's wonderful. I'll go put away the medkit, and-"

"-Wait."

As he grasped at your sleeve, you stopped and turned around to look at him. Once again, his face was turned away from you, but this time it was a far more bashful gesture than a distressed one. You weren't completely sure, but you thought you could see a hint of pink dusting over his cheeks.

Saeran breathed a sigh, almost like he was preparing himself before saying anything. Then, he pulled you back a little bit. "...Stay. Please."

There was no need for you to hear anything else.

And so, that's how you ended up holding him close as you both huddled up on the couch, your chin resting on top of his head as he buried his face in your chest. For a while, only the sounds of your shared breaths filled the space. You promised him you wouldn't ask for anything, and you were not about to go back on that promise.

Saeran was the one who spoke up.

"Is... Hyung alright?"

Humming, you raised your hand to run your fingers through his unruly hair. The main purpose is to keep him calm and relaxed. "He's okay. Very worried about you, though."

Saeran tenses a bit, but then sighs heavily, almost in defeat. You bite back on the desire to push him for answers.

"I... didn't mean to scream at him like that. I just-"

A shaky breath. You squeeze him a bit tighter, your other hand rubbing soothing circles on his back.

"You don't have to say anything you don't want to say, Saeran. None of us blame you."

"-You should."

It was up to you to be the one to sigh now.

"Saeran..."

He shakes his head, but his grip on you tightens, his voice becoming shakier by the moment. It seemed as though he was engaged in a mental battle with himself. It hurt you to be unable to do anything but just hold him and let him talk.

"You know why I started screeching at him for no reason? There must be some rational explanation, right? That's what you think. Well, there isn't. I-" Another shaky breath. The sound of this one was almost like a sob. Your heart started pounding in your chest with anxiety. "I cut my hand on the knife, and just the sight of blood on my hands set me off. I threw a glass bowl at my brother because of a fucking cut on my hand."

You didn't answer right away. Gathering your thoughts and emotions is definitely necessary before you proceed and say something you might regret later. You should be careful here.

So that's what happened... Now that you thought about it, the sight of blood did always make Saeran very uncomfortable. But, to see it coating his hands... Well, you didn't have to guess for long. All three of you were aware of what actually occurred to V on that day.

And what a heavy burden Saeran had to carry with him for the rest of his life.

"Oh... Saeran..."

"-Just-" At this point, it was clear that he was crying. His entire body was shaking with silent sobs as he pressed himself further into you, almost like he was trying to hide from the world in your embrace. "Just hold me. Please. I- I feel so sick..."

So you do. Without uttering a single word. Holding him is what you do. You will have a proper conversation about it once he lets it all out.

Until then, you will be there for him to be his support.

[shinypeachkitten]

Loved ~~ Paul Landers

I really have to apologize for my extreme LAME titels for the stories xD I'm really sorry. I have a really colorfull imagination but if it comes to titels : NOTHING xD

sorraayy :-)

Warnings : Fluff & Smut :3

You came home from a busy day at work. You smiled when you heard Paul was home. He would always made you laugh and make you feel good and most of all loved.

Bück dich!“, befehl’ ich dir'' Paul sings and you laugh while walking into the kitchen. ''Maybe later if you're nice'' Paul immediately turns around and walks over to hug you. ''Aren't i always?'' he laughs and kisses you softly. '' How went recording today?'' you asked and he smiled. ''Good! Richard made a cover for Buck Dich and now it's stuck in my head. That's probably why people looked at me funny when i sang it'' You giggled. ''Yes, for some people sex is still a taboo'' . ''Poor people'' Paul said and you nodded. '' How was your day love?'' You smiled. '' It sucked .. bad.. but it's better now i'm home'' You wrapped your arms around him and hold him tight. Paul smiled. He would do everything to make you happy and feel loved. He loved you very much. '' I would like to take a shower, will you come with me? You said and Paul smiled as he pulled you into the bathroom. He turned on the shower and helped you get undressed. He unzipped your pants and placed some kisses down your legs. You smiled while stroking his hair. He looked up at you and you felt butterflies in your stomach. He came back up but never stopped looking at you. You were smiling like a idiot. This man could make you feel so many things at once. ''Fuck Paul..'' you mumbled and he grinned while undressing himself. ''What?'' You handsome son of a bitch'' you laughed and got under the shower. The warm jets of the shower slid over your body and you let out a sigh. This is what you needed. A warm shower with Paul. You closed your eyes in enjoyment and felt Paul put his arms around you and kiss your shoulder blades. He laid his head on your shoulder and the both of you stood there for a couple of minutes.

After you were done, Paul dried himself off and wanted to put on his boxers but you stopped him. You smashed your lips on his before grabbing his hands and lead him to the bedroom. You crawled into bed and soon you started kissing. '' All day i have been thinking about you babe'' You said and Paul smiled. You had had a tough time. Paul was away with the band a lot and you didn't see each other much because of that. But it made your love for each other stronger. ''Ich liebe dich so sehr meine schatze'' he said. It made you blush. Paul sat up straight and put your in his lap. You let out a moan when you felt he was already hard. He pulled you closer and start kissing you again. His hands slid to your breasts and massaged your nipples. You moaned while gripping his hair and kissed his neck. His hand slipped between your legs and felt how wet you were. You took his hand and licked his fingers clean. His gaze went from loving to pure lust ''Babe, that was so sexy'' he said and you felt his dick twitching. You had a big smile across your face and while you still looked in his eyes, you lowered yourself down on his dick. The both of you let out a moan while you started moving. You shiverd and closed your eyes in enjoyment. '' Look at me'' Paul growled and your eyes shot open and looked at him. '' You like it when i look at you while we fuck don't you?'' You said laughing and moaning at the same time. '' Yes, your are the most sexy thing on this world '' he said while grabbing your hair and pulled on it. Not too hard or too soft but just right. ''Fuck'' you moaned and your licked your lips before kissing Paul again. You bit his lip and started to pick up the pace. Paul threw his head back in pleasure. You licked his nek and softly bit his shoulder afterwards. The room was filled with moans and the slopping sounds of sex basically. ''Babe, i'm gonna cum'' you said and he grabbed your face between his hands. '' Look at me when you do'' he growled and at that moment you felt your high washing over you while looking at Paul. He had a big smile and then slammed his head back while he came hard. You fell on top of him and he pulled you against his chest. '' Thank you for making my day so much better'' you said and he smiled. '' Don't need to thank me, but there is something you can do for me'' he said and you looked up to him. ''What's that love?'' He grabbed your face again before placing a kiss on your lips'' '' Marry me'' he said and your mouth fell wide open. '' Seriously?'' you said and he nodded. You smiled before kissing him. '' I will''

[mokulule]

I am required to inform you that months ago I found some of your writing, but accidentally refreshed my dash before I could do more than like it. And my dumb ass forgot that I could find you by going through my liked posts until three days after. When it was thoroughly buried

So anyway the squeal I let out after connecting The Epic Lost Writing My Friends Are Tired Of Me Lamenting About and you both actually hurt my throat and startled all four cats sleeping on the couch around me into fleeing the room in under one (1) second leaving chaos in their paths including but not limited to: chair relocation, end table now sideways, dog chasing cats, tv mysteriously turning on, cat fight in hallway, missing tv remote discovered under previously upright end table after four months, crashing in dining room, three chairs knocked over in dining room, dining room table void of clutter, dining room floor rapidly cluttered, dining room light fixture swinging, different cat fight in kitchen, and the baby (cat raised from one week old I co-parented with my dog, not a human baby) releasing her inner husky to the detriment of every resident's eardrums like the orange cat she is

You have a great power, is what I'm getting at here (worth every hour of clean-up this'll take)

ahdgshgjlbaflbvablafjdhakdjnfb OMG, this is absolutely amazing! The picture of absolute mayhem you paint here (and it just keeps going!) I don't even, I laughed so hard I needed to go find my inhaler XD

First of all I am glad you found your remote control asjdhgfeflgjrh (sorry I am still laughing here even days after you sent this, like I have been just been laughing and smiling every time I remembered this sat in my inbox.) Secondly, I am sorry for the mess? I am very happy and flattered though that you were so excited to rediscover my writing, I hope you enjoy it still :D Thank you so much for sharing this, I think this has about made my year <3

[echoing--stars]

ok picture this: Wars is an absolute MENACE. He goes to bake and Rowan just so happens to check the expiration date on let's say his baking powder which may be 20 plus years old....

just pulling ideas outta thin air ya know not targeted at all

Totally not going out of order to post this one today while it's fresh nope not at all

This was supposed to be crack, but it's mostly just very sweet! It is also based on a true story of a beloved friend using baking powder that is older than they are. I will be kind and not call them out though XD

This one also got long. It's longer than some of my fics on ao3 I'm pretty sure! And I remembered to use a read more line break this time!

(If you read this and would like to request a supposedly short snippet, see this post!)

Link thought that Rowan would be proud of him. He’d read the recipe twice — twice! — before starting. He’d taken out all the ingredients and all the equipment he needed. He’d only had to dig for a few things, but he’d bought the chocolate and butter that he knew they were out of yesterday.  If he’d misread the recipe yesterday and thought he’d needed baking soda instead of baking powder, well, no one had to know except himself. They’d use the extra baking soda someday. He assumed. And he’d found some baking powder anyways so what did it matter? He cracked the eggs in a bowl and made sure no pieces of shells were left in them. He measured out the sugars and dumped them in the mixing bowl along with the sticks of butter (and yes, he had remembered to take them out of the fridge that morning) and added two teaspoons of vanilla.

Link put the eggs and the sugar canisters away and then wiped the sugar residue out of the measuring cups he’d used. Rowan had talked about the importance of cleaning as you go and keeping a tidy workspace, after all. Next was measuring the dry ingredients. He started with the smaller measurements, putting them in a small ramekin for now. If he put them on the bottom of the bigger bowl, they wouldn’t mix well.  Another thing that Rowan had taught him was how to properly measure flour for baking. If you couldn’t weigh it, then you should spoon it into the cup and then level it. But was it really that important? Link thought for a moment, then shook his head. This was a simple cookie recipe, it wasn’t that big of a deal. He dunked the measuring cup into the bag of flour and scooped some up. He smooshed it against the side of the bag to even out the flour and — Knock knock! Link dropped the measuring cup into the bag of flour and grabbed his phone. Had one of his roommates forgotten their keys? It was too early for Rowan to be here, he wasn’t supposed to be off work for another hour. There was another knock and Link wiped his hands on a paper towel before heading to the door. He unlocked it but left the chain on, opening it just enough to see who was on the other side. “Rowan?” His boyfriend smiled sheepishly, and Link shut the door to undo the chain before letting Rowan in. “There’s a peephole for a reason, you know.” “That’s less dramatic.” “Whatever you say, Link.” Rowan pulled him into a brief hug, and when they pulled away, Link pressed a kiss against his lips. Rowan smiled into the kiss, and Link laughed as they pulled apart again. He turned to head back into the kitchen. “Why are you here so early? I thought you were at work until seven.” “It was slow today, so I left early.” Rowan dropped onto one of the bar stools at the counter. “What are you making?” Link blushed and rubbed the back of his neck. “I wanted to make you cookies. I’m sure they won’t be anything fancy, not what you make, but—” “They’ll be perfect, Link.” Link’s cheeks heated even more, and he turned back to the bag of flour. Now was not the time to flirt. Not even if Rowan looked extra cute with his hair coming undone from the bun he normally kept it in and the soft sweater and… He shook his head. No time for distractions. Now that Rowan was watching, Link measured the flour right. He took the spoon he’d left out and scooped the flour into the cup and leveled it with a spatula. He dumped it into the mixing bowl and started on the next cup.

Rowan was fidgeting in his seat while Link worked. Link tried to ignore him, to concentrate on what he was doing. But it wasn’t exactly easy. He’d just dumped the second cup of flour into the bowl when Rowan stood and walked around to Link’s side of the counter. He stood behind Link and wrapped his arms around Link’s waist, leaning down until he could tuck his chin over Link’s shoulder. “Rowan, you’re going to distract me.” “But I missed you!” Link hummed and tilted his head to the side until their cheeks were touching. The position was a bit awkward, but Link wouldn’t trade it for the world. After a few moments, Link got back to work. He grabbed the whisk and stirred the flour briefly. Rowan’s arms tensed around him briefly, making Link pause. Rowan pressed against his back as he reached towards the canister of baking powder still on the counter. Link took a small step forward to make it easier for Rowan to reach it and grabbed the ramekin of salt and baking powder he’d measured out earlier.

“Why are you using baking powder?” Link paused and let his hand fall to the counter. “That’s what the recipe says?” “Where’s the recipe?” Link gestured to the bag of chocolate chips. “The one on the back.” Rowan stepped away from Link’s back and grabbed the bag. He scanned the recipe before looking back at Link. “It says soda, hon. Most recipes like this use baking soda.” Link grabbed the bag from Rowan’s hands and squinted at the label. Had he been correct yesterday after all? “I swear I read this like three times!” Rowan laughed — the audacity — and shook his head. “You guys have baking soda right?” “I bought some yesterday.” Rowan raised an eyebrow, but didn’t question him. Link dumped out the ramekin into the trash while Rowan grabbed the can of baking powder to put it away. “Link, where did you get this baking powder?” “Huh? I found it in the cupboard. Why?” “Link. Link, this is expired.” Link turned around. Rowan was holding the can upside down and frowning down at it. “Oh. Stuff is usually okay to use past the expiration date. And besides, Time used it a few months ago I’m pretty sure.” Not that the whatever he’d been attempting to make had turned out well. But Time had never been good in the kitchen, at least not without his girlfriend to supervise. Link couldn’t reasonably blame the baking powder for that. “No, Link.” Rowan shook his head. “This expired over 20 years ago.” “That’s not possible.” Rowan held out the can for Link to take. And just as he’d said, the date on the bottom read Nov 97. “What in the fuck?” Rowan burst into laughter. “You were a toddler when this was purchased!” Link dropped the can on the counter. “Stop laughing! It’s not my fault!” “Was it here when you moved?” “How am I supposed to know? I assumed Time or Twilight bought it.” “They’ve only lived here, what? A few years? Did one of them inherit this can from their parents?”  Link sunk to the floor, head in his hands. That only made Rowan laugh harder, until he was nearly wheezing. Link could feel how red he was, his cheeks flushed from the embarrassment. “Rowan, how I supposed to know?” Link flopped onto the floor, hands still on his cheeks. He was glad that he’d mopped earlier before this whole fiasco. “This can looks like it’s from the 90s, Link. It’s all yellow and faded.” “Maybe that’s just what baking powder looks like. You’re the baker here, not me.” Okay, now he knew he was just whining. It’s not like he’d already made the cookies. Rowan knelt down next to him, his laughter finally fading. His cheeks were as red as Link’s felt. “I know, and it was very sweet of you to try. Do you want to finish?”

[miusmusings]

thank you for tagging me ! i just hope that i have enough time to dig into my WIP XD

and i really want to know more about AutoNubneung baking fic

Thanks for the ask!! <33

This is actually one of my fav fics but i've gotten distracted while writing it and now i can't get back :')

it's is a very silly, very fluffy one where Nueng teaches Auto how to bake because being a talented chef, Auto has never baked anything. He was always too busy taking care of his family's chinese restaurant, and is now scared to bake cause he feels that he *will* mess it all up. part of his insecurity comes from how Nueng can bake so, so well, and also pull off a more than decent savoury dish when need be—Auto feels like a one trick horse.

anyway, Neung shows his around the kitchen and helps Auto to bake a simple cake for Chef Oab's bday. Auto is sure he will mess it up and why is he the one baking when he has a baker bf?? but they both know oab will love it more if it's from Auto's hand cause that grumpy chef likes to pass cooking skills to ppl who love cooking owo

Auto does mess up, and his icing skills are horrible, but with Neung's help and his own efforts, they end up with an edible (downright delicious, if you ask Nueng) cake with amateurish icing.

Ofc, they make a mess with the leftover icing and get it all over the place! (Nueng smears icing on his lips and says he needs help cleaning up. Auto rolls his eyes but ends up kissing him in the end!)

[mintytealfox]

You used to teach people how to pan for gold?

I did LOL the very simplified version of it and it was always hot as frick outside so hiding the fool's gold in the cool water down in the sand felt nice LOOOL (until fall would hit then my hands would be FREEZING AH) If I am remembering right we also had this hella creepy display where you would look down the glass window and you would see this miner down there with a canary with him, I can't remember if it slowly moved or not XD but I kind of remember the sound of this motor sound down in the basement where we would have lunch in the room next to him LOOOL we even had a 'prospector pit' for the kiddos and I thought it was lame as hell LOOOOL, but fun for kids, they would 'dig' in these rubber bits to get 'gems' 🙃🤣🤣🤣 The geologist, at the time, would get so excited about his rock and gem collection lol (I remember having to fight off the mean Geese up there, those things were HORRIBLE) (AND DON'T GET ME STARTED ON THE CHICKENS THAT WOULD FIGHT ME ON THE WAY TO THE RESTROOM AAHHH I would have to run for my life through the gardens and slip through the little opening in the fence to ESCAPE LOL)

I also taught mock school at the school house to show people what school life was like in the late 1800s I had to ring the bell every hour! I actually legit hated that cause it was so LOUD when right next to it ah my ears are ringing just thinking about it ah and that heavy as hell mallet 🤣🤣 but it would be a different subject for each hour in the morning and then repeat for the afternoon.

And spinning thread (I was so bad at it oh my gosh) Talking about wool and the dying process 👍

and quilting (so now I know how to hand sew but the sewing machine still makes me scratch my head LOL)

and leather working (I would just talk about the types of leather and the process of tanning, I didn't do it myself that was for the experts. And I would only fill in when they needed an extra pair of hands 👍)

Taught some of the old dances too, but I hardly remember them now though -weeps-

and cooking in the old cast iron wood burning stove (where I got heat exhaustion cause there is a reason they would just cook outside or had a 'summer kitchen' during the summer months oh my GOSH) and I burnt EVERYTHING cause my pyromaniac self would make the fire too HOT LOL There were ladies who made THE BEST food in that thing though! like TOP TEIR BEST EVER! There is something about it that is just AHH SO EXTRA GOOOOD but anyway scraping out the ash afterwards was pretty satisfying and chopping more wood for the next day was liberating after dealing with some of the ANNOYING visitors (It was this dull as hell light little hatchet so it was all brute force and magic (finding where the log will likely split easiest) to pop those suckers in half oh my GOSH) This was also where my SEETHING, LOATHING, HAAATTEEEE for churning butter came from 😤😤 (cleaning that junk with freshly boiled water was the ACTUAL WORST, but at least I was allowed to use dawn dish soap and properly re-clean everything after closing for obvious reasons PFF)

This is only SOME of the stuff I did and had to learn so I could teach and perform LOOOOOL

//at least the laundry was fake but beating the rugs was one of my least favorite things like BRUH now all that GARBAGE DUST Is all over ME NOW AAAAAAA

lol whenever I hear 'oh man living in the 1800s would be fascinating' I say 'NO IT WOULDN'T, IT SUCKS, DON'T' 🤣🤣🤣

and the GHOSTS THERE I SWEAR I WAS ABOUT TO FIGHT SOME SUPERNATURAL RAAAAAAH

[goosewriting]

Mikey with blue prompt 1 and 32, trying to teach the reader how to make cookies but they're uh... Not. That good at it lmao. But they keep trying and it ends with them making a pretty good batch!

Vanilla extract (rottmnt Mikey x reader)

prompt 1: “I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone screw something up that fast before.” prompt 32: “Do you take constructive criticism?” “Not without crying.”

summary: Mikey and reader bake cookies together, but reader is really bad at it. 

relationship: Rise!Mikey x GN reader

warnings: reader being a danger in the kitchen lmao 

word count: 1.2k

A/N: (this one can be read as both platonic or romantic!) as someone who really likes baking cookies, this hurt a little to write XD also enjoy the currently tumblr-relevant little joke höhö

(english is not my first language. constructive criticism and grammar corrections are very appreciated!)

– – – 

Mikey and you had decided to bake cookies, which you had never done before. You had actually never baked anything before, and you weren’t exactly an ace in the kitchen. So he was more than happy to teach you. He even had the recipe book open on the counter so you could check the instructions with him. After all, how hard could it be? 

“First things first” Mikey says, as you both finish tying your aprons. “We need to measure all the ingredients.”

And that’s when disaster already hit.

You had never really handled flour before, so you flipped the package over with a little too much force, causing a lot of flour to spill onto the counter instead of into the measuring cup. Mikey was quick to tell you it wasn’t a big deal, and wiped the surface with a damp cloth, instructing you to either go slower or use a big spoon to get the powder out bit by bit. 

After the dry ingredients were all measured and standing on the counter in their individual bowls, it was time to mix them up. You remembered Mikey mentioning that the dry and the wet ingredients had to be mixed separately first before combining them. So you grab the sugar and are about to pour it into the flour, when Mikey stops you.

“It’s actually better to mix up the sugar with the butter” he points out. “It makes the butter fluffier.”

Now you’re even more confused; how would that even work?

Following the turtle’s instructions, you first mashed up the butter with a fork, then put that and the sugar into the stand mixer. You turned on the machine, but the dials were opposite of how you thought, so you set it to the maximum speed. That not only almost broke the mixer, but it also sent the bowl and its contents flying. You sheepishly cleaned up the mess and measured out more sugar, while Mikey told you not to worry about it for the second time that day.

When the butter was all mixed with the sugar, it was time to add the eggs. You were about to reach out for one when Mikey stepped in and said he’d do it himself. Fidgeting with a spoon in your hands, you watched as he skillfully cracked them open, the yolk and whites falling into the bowl in an almost elegant way that you felt was intended to mock you. He didn’t get a single eggshell piece into the batter either. 

After mixing everything together (now that you knew how to properly operate the stand mixer), Mikey handed you a little bottle that read “vanilla extract”. You opened the bottle, giving it a sniff, and hummed in delight at how good that smelled.

“Hey, look at me” Mikey suddenly said in a serious tone, grabbing you by the shoulders. “One tablespoon, not more. You understand? Just a couple of drops is all it takes.”

You nodded and did as he said, adding only a small spoonful of the thick liquid to the batter. After closing the bottle, you looked at the spoon for probably a second too long, because Mikey snatched it from your hand.

“You don’t want to lick that, trust me” he said with a chuckle. “You’ll regret it.”

You narrowed your eyes at him. It smelled so wonderful! Of course you wanted to lick it. It surely tasted just as good right? 

But your plan couldn't come to fruition as Mikey was already starting the next step. He added some chocolate chips, mixed it a little more, then sifted the flour into the batter. He first folded it in with a wooden spatula, then with his hands. 

Taking out the dough, he skillfully kneaded it on the counter, and you wondered how many times he had done this before, he clearly knew what he was doing. With the rolling pin he flattened it all to a cookie-worthy thickness and stepped aside to make place for you.

“Would you do the honours?” he asked, handing you a container with several cookie cutters. 

You squealed in glee at all the cute designs, and chose one in the shape of a sea turtle. Surely this was the easiest, impossible-to-mess-up part, right?

Mikey first observed you with happiness, content that he could teach you something new. But with every passing second, his expression turned to horrified confusion. Somehow, and he still couldn’t understand how, every single piece of dough you had cut out, came out looking like anything other than a turtle. Even when you switched to the regular circular cookie cutter, the cookies you were scooping up from the counter looked like disfigured sad little blobs. Before he could stop himself, he mumbled under his breath.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone screw something up that fast before.”

He regretted the words as soon as they left his mouth. You gasped, giving him a hurt look, then looking back at your handiwork in front of you, and you pouted: he was absolutely right. 

“But hey, we came this far!” Mikey tried to comfort you. “They don’t have to look perfect, as long as they taste good; that just means they’re homemade! All that’s left is to bake them.” 

So you did, except that you forgot to set the timer for the cookies in the oven while you were cleaning up the kitchen. You both got distracted talking about a game, and as you were taking out your phone to show it to him, he sniffed the air.

“Say, how much longer on the timer?” Mikey asked and craned his neck over your shoulder to look at the oven in horror.

“Whoops” is all that you managed to answer, before you both rushed to save whatever you could of your precious baked goods. Mikey quickly slipped the oven mitts over his hands and opened the glass door, a concerning cloud of smoke erupting from behind it. Taking the baking tray and placing it on the stove, you both stood silently before it, staring at the practically carbonised little blobs on it. 

“Hey, it’s fine~” Mikey suddenly said, one arm over your shoulder while his other reached out to grab a cookie. You couldn’t stop him in time, as he had already popped one in his mouth. The crunching that came from his chewing mouth was as concerning as it was horrifying. You could only watch in shock as he actually gulped it down.

“Hmm” he sighed, rubbing his chin in thought. “Do you take constructive criticism?” 

“Not without crying” you answered, and your shoulders slumped. How could you mess this up so badly?

Mikey chuckled and pulled you in for a hug, giving your cheek a little peck, which made you feel a little better. He then suggested making a new batch, but this time he made sure to give you more detailed instructions and guide you through every step. That new batch actually turned out really well, and you enjoyed your well-deserved prize with some hot chocolate.

– – –

Bonus: 

You were sitting at the table with the rest of the turtles, all eating your cookies and complimenting you on how good they had turned out, when you remembered something. Excusing yourself for a second to go get more hot chocolate, you stepped back into the kitchen, and reached for the vanilla extract bottle. You gave it another whiff, enjoying the smell, and poured some drops onto a spoon. As soon as you put it in your mouth however, you immediately regretted it. Mikey was right: this tasted awful. Going “Ew! How?!” followed by coughing, you heard a laugh from the other room, and Mikey’s voice: “I told you so!”

~~~~~

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