#not-love-letters

[dwead-piwate-meggers]

It Seems Like I Should Say, "As Long As This Is Love"

Chapter 5 (1, 2, 3, 4)

Fed up with dealing with her feelings alone, Charlotte begins to write some letters. She doesn’t send them. She can’t send them. But at least she can pretend to tell him how she feels. Spoilers for Book 3.

Adam du Mortain x f!detective rating: t warnings: none Read Chapter 5 on Ao3

tag list: @brightpinkpeppercorn

The Warehouse

Written on Agency Letterhead

Here we are again. Penning the things I can’t (won’t) say to your face. I suppose I should be flattered that you seem to believe that I’m fearless. Are you so wrapped up in yourself that you can’t sense it? Or do I hide it so well that even a vampire can’t tell?

I’m not fearless, Adam. I wish I was. Christ, do I wish I was. It might make all of this easier. I'm not though. I'm scared. So scared. Of so many things. Of being the source of all this trouble for my home. Of watching you and Morgan and Nate and Farah put yourselves on the line for me, again and again. Of having to spend the rest of my life running and fighting just to be free. Life expectancy keeps creeping up - I could live well past 80. I’ve got a lot of fight in me (you know that). I don’t know if I have another 50 years of it.

The day’s going to come that I’m too tired to run or fight anymore. I’m scared of… of being taken again. Of being someone else’s experiment. Of being a tool, a battery. Being used to commit who knows what monstrosities. Of… of all… of that.

And I’m scared of loving you.

I have… Historically, the people I have loved lie to me and leave me. Overtly or by omission, through death or abandonment, I’m lied to and left.

I don’t know if you’ve ever lied to me. I'd like to think you haven’t, that you wouldn’t. But you've hidden things, haven’t you? Sometimes it’s been because of orders. (And we can debate the morality of that another time.) Sometimes, though, sometimes it hasn’t. (I don’t mean your family. That’s personal. That was your right to keep to yourself.) DMB? Trappers? There wasn’t really a reason not to explain those to me, not when I had clearance (I had clearance, didn’t I?) but you wanted to keep that information from me anyway. And maybe that’s not the same as an outright lie, but damn if secrets don’t feel close.

As for death or abandonment…well. Given your functional immortality, I’ve got a feeling for which of the two options is more likely. We sort of live there, don’t we?

C.

[octoberloved]

[mychemicalbrromance]

Guys ive been reading peak

[loveelizabeths]

there is a love in which i will always know you, just incase you forget.

love elizabeth s.

[itsbrucey]

Big fan of sun motifs in characters not necessarily being about positivity and happiness and how they're so " bright and warm" but instead being about fucking brutal they are.

Radiant. A FORCE of nature that will turn you to ash. That warmth that burns so hot it feels like ice. Piercing yellow and red and white. A character being a Sun because you cannot challenge a Sun without burning alive or taking everything down with them if victorious.

[mournfulroses]

Vladimir Mayakovsky, from a letter featured in "Love in the Heart of Everything; The Correspondence between Vladimir Mayakovsky & Lili Brik, 1915-1930,"

[notholaenas]

another gotham gazette exclusive 🤭

insta

[star-girlfriend]

Did u get my vibes man?

[ciearcab]

beyond the distant horizon

[tamsoj]

Sylvia Plath, "Love Letter"

[gentlemosses]

butch love letter

14x18in acrylic on canvas

[octoberloved]

[latepivi]

happy au i don't know her

[loveelizabeths]

love elizabeth s.

[ticklingtimetickstotest]