#not to sound puritanical but kindness matters

[anteroom-of-death]

I think people who let their children use slurs and get a kick out of them using them to others or even swearing at others especially in public deserve permanent jail time and their kids to get adopted by vegans who do gentle parenting.

[cerastes]

I'd like a little more insight into your opinions about that post you reblogged, which stated that "families are the biggest danger to children".

That post did not include a proposed solution, and I would like to know if you have a solution in mind.

I don't see how it doesn't involve giving the police greater leeway to invade the privacy of homes. Or otherwise putting childcare in the hands of government workers who don't live with the children. Government workers who either never had children and have no idea what it is like, or who do have children and should be spending that time minding their own.

You’re kind of self-reporting when your first and seeming only thought on the matter is “This necessarily means giving police or government more power” and not “the dynamics of power between adults and children are so immensely messed up and the concept of protecting children has been warped into a puritan shield towards any cause except actually protecting children”. That post you’re referring to is not in the slightest a hard read, anon. I’d say it’s pretty darn explicit and clear in its intent, in fact.

If you look up kidnappings, the majority happen between family members. If you ask any child therapist worth their moral salt what it’s like practicing their craft, they’ll tell you that the vast majority of the time it’s mainly grounding work with the child and actual psychological work with their parents, who are the actual reason behind the issues with the kid most of the time.

Most if not all cultures are just not at all kind with children. The most immediate people to a child — often their family — are either their greatest protectors or their biggest threat. Sometimes, it’s both simultaneously, and this isn’t some fake deep philosophical nonsense, either; a lot of times, a parent or the parents might genuinely wish the best for the kid, and yet, they are horribly abusive in ways they don’t even clock as abuse or as treating the child as mere property that they get to order around. Even when that is “for their own good”.

Forgive me if I sound outright insulting here, but if you didn’t even grasp this before wanting to have this conversation, are you at all equipped to have this conversation? This is not even getting to the puritan shield part, just the part where family as both a boon and a threat is concerned.

I’ll also have you know that conversation around and about a problem can exist without offering solutions and merely acknowledging it as a problem. This is known as a “conversation”. Demanding solutions in your conversations necessarily is how you get bad ideas and fringe, often extremist answers.

[idle-daydreams]

Demon King - Part 2

Shutendoji!Chuuya x Reader

Continuation of this.

Tw: Yandere, dub-con, mentions of blood, cannibalism and violence

[A.N: This got way too long, and isn't very yandere-y, imo. But its been in my head for a while, and I hope you guys like it!]

In a certain way, being the wife of the Drunken Demon wasn’t all that bad.

You’d reached this conclusion on a silent night like this one, padding through the corridors by yourself. Chuuya’s – Manor? Castle? You weren’t quite sure – was far bigger than the quarters to which you were confined, quarters that were nevertheless larger than your entire home back in your village. They were a picture of comfort: there was a massive canopied bed, piled high with the softest pillows for you to sleep on; magical lamps illuminated the place, neither dimming nor burning out no matter how long they were kept lit. A roaring fire kept you warm in the winters, and hidden vents that kept you cool in the summer. There was always food and water, fresh and clean and delicious. You had your own bath, with more running water than you could have ever used in your entire life, heated or cooled to your body temperature. Chuuya brought you books to read, parchment to paint, any manner of things to pass the time, things that you couldn’t ever have imagined owning. He’d even allowed you a garden, though you weren’t to go there in his absence. He loved to spoil you, giving you everything you could possibly ask for; he was kind, and patient, indulging your idlest whim and your most irrational desires.

The only thing he denied you was your freedom.

You sighed, sinking down upon your bed. At one time, the loneliness had frightened you. Stories of the Drunken Demon had consumed your mind, and you’d spent countless hours curled up in a corner, crying and shaking and throwing up from the sheer terror of what he would do to you. Now, you relished these moments of solitude, times when Chuuya wasn’t clinging to your waist or brushing your hair or fucking you senseless wherever he could. The bruises and love-bites littering your skin, proof of his demented love, delighted him to a frenzy. Your cheeks still burned at the memory of hours the two of you had spent locked in a tangle of limbs, lost in the throes of pleasure, worlds removed from the puritanical teachings of your wifely duties drilled into your head during your early years. As with everything else, you’d gotten used to it – that part of your ‘marriage’ had been shamefully easy to get used to – but you knew what inevitably lay next. Either Chuuya would grow tired of you... or he would impregnate you. You’d never liked the idea of children, but the thought of raising half-demon offspring filled you with dread.

How long has it been? you wondered. Weeks? Months? A year? Despite the massive windows – always shut for your safety, of course, but still allowing you a view of the walled gardens – it was difficult to gauge the passage of time, since the path of the sun and moon didn’t seem to be that consistent in the demon world. You couldn’t help but wonder: did your family miss you, or did they think you dead? If Chuuya had truly bought you from them – and despite your adamant refusals to his face, you had to admit your family would have easily sold you off – then what tale had he spun to them? What exactly had they thought of Chuuya himself?

The thought of your ‘husband’ still sent shivers down your spine. It was difficult to wrap your head around the idea of being the wife of Shuten Doji, a demon so terrifying that people had trembled at the very sound of his name. Even though Chuuya wasn’t that Shuten Doji, he was still insanely powerful: on the rare occasion that Chuuya had taken you out in public, arm wrapped firmly around your waist, you’d been awed by the sight of great and dreadful demons sinking to their knees before him, not even daring to look upon his face. You’d seen him fight, tearing apart beasts and monsters twice his size with his bare hands, a maniacal grin on his face, red marks dancing upon his skin, reminders of his power. It had been incredible to witness and terrifying to comprehend.

The sound of the door opening jolted you from your thoughts. You tensed as a pair of muscular arms wrapped around you, Chuuya’s now-familiar from pressing against your back.

“Hey, [Y/N],” he murmured in your ear. “I’m back. Did you miss me?”

 “Good evening, Chuuya.” You reached up to caress his cheek. “Yes, I missed you very much.”

“Good. I missed you too.” He pressed kisses upon the side of your neck. “So, what were you doing all day? You haven’t finished that watercolor you were working on. I thought you liked that stuff.”

“I… was thinking of you.” You closed your eyes as his hands began to wander. “I guess I lost track of time.”

“Aw, that’s sweet.” Chuuya molded himself to you even tighter. “I know the feeling. I can’t get you out of my head either, you know that? I love you so much, miss you so much, it’s almost annoying sometimes. Sometimes I wish I could carry you around with me, you know? Put you in my pocket so that I can look at you wherever I go. Wouldn’t you like that, [Y/N]?”

“It would be nice.” You shifted slightly, trying to put some distance between the two of you as surreptitiously as you could. He was just so close: his hands were splayed upon your belly, chest flush against your back, chin resting in the crook of your neck. Chuuya responded with a small growl, nipping at your ear.

“Stop it,” he murmured. “I haven’t seen you since this morning. You want to be with me, don’t you?”

“Of course,” you said quickly. “But, I just, um—” Your eye fell upon the gourd of sake sitting in the corner— “I just thought you might like a drink.”

“Hm? Why not?” To your relief, Chuuya loosened his grip on you, leaning back to recline lazily on the bed. His eyes, however, followed your every movement, his gaze hungry.

“Come here,” he said as you proffered the sake to him. “You know I don’t like drinkin’ alone.”

You pursed your lips. You didn’t like the demon lord’s wine; while Chuuya claimed it wasn’t made from human blood, he also wouldn’t tell you exactly where it came from. Nevertheless, you settled into his embrace once again, allowing him to wrap an arm around you. Chuuya began playing with the sash of your kimono.

“You seem distracted tonight, [Y/N],” he said, playing with the sash of your kimono. “Is something wrong?”

“No, nothing’s wrong.”

“You’re usually way more sarcastic than you’re being right now. Did anything happen? Are you unhappy? Do you want something?”

“No.” You bit your lip as the silken fabric gave way all too easily under his sharp nails, allowing his hands to brush against your breast. “I’m happy to be with you. I don’t want anything right now.”

“Then drink.” He held the sake to your lips invitingly. It was rich and dark and far too potent for your liking, making your head spin with a single sip. You grabbed his wrist to stop him, making him laugh.

“Still so weak,” he said. “But you should drink more. It’ll make you feel better.”

“I’m fine.”

“That’s what you always say. I’m starting to feel like that’s code for something.”

He set aside the gourd, lowering his head to your breasts. Slowly, with agonizing tenderness, he began suckling on the pebbled flesh, drawing a keening moan from your lips.

“C-Chuuya,” you said. “Please.”

“Please what? You want me to stop?”

“No, but—” Your breath hitched as Chuuya returned to his ministrations, fist tightening in his hair. He was good, so good, that it was almost frightening. His hands wandered your body, sending sparks dancing in their wake. You arced your back, forgetting your hesitations as your mind sank deeper into a pleasurable haze. As you let out another moan, Chuuya hummed in approval.

“I want you, [Y/N],” he mumbled against your skin. “I want you so much it hurts sometimes. You’re so beautiful, so kind, so perfect in every way. I’ve seen my fair share of princesses and noble women, but none of ‘em hold a candle to you, you know that?”

“T—Thank you.” You looked away, embarrassed by his praise. Even after the level of intimacy between the two of you, it was still difficult to talk to him. There was a wide gulf between the two of you, a gulf you didn’t think you could ever cross.

Chuuya raised himself on his forearms to look at you. Your eyes flitted to his bare chest and his well-sculpted body, a being that once had been only a dream. Heat flooded your face, pleasure and panic tangling in your chest, and his smile widened.

“You like me too, don’t you?” he purred. “Course you do. I still remember the first time I brought you here. You were so scared then, such a shy little mouse. Now you’re not so scared, are you? Now you love me.”

“Yes.”

“Say it.”

“I love you.”

He chuckled delightedly, swooping to press his forehead against yours. “I love you too,” he whispered against your lips. “I’ll give you anything and everything you want. A slip of moonlight? A bed of gold? The heads of every man in the world laid out at your feet? All you have to do is ask.”

You gazed upon him, into his guileless, grey-blue eyes. “I want to go home,” you whispered.

Chuuya paused, sitting up. Your heart sank, and you braced yourself for the incoming onslaught of begging and accusations.

“Home,” he said flatly. “You want to go… to your human home.”

“Not because I don’t love you,” you said quickly. “But – I am a human, Chuuya. I’m not a demon like you. I can’t live locked up forever like this.”

“Neither can demons.” He reached out to trace patterns along your shoulders, his tone oddly flat. “A demon’s world is far bigger than that of any human. I could show you things, places, people you couldn’t even imagine. You know the only reason I keep you locked up is because you continue to resist me.”

“I don’t resist you,” you pointed out hopelessly. “I live with you; I sleep with you. I call myself your wife! What more do you want?”

“There is more.” Chuuya leaned in closer, a strange light in his eyes.” There is a ritual – a proper ritual to join the two of us for all of eternity. If you’d only agree to that, then we’d be mates for the rest of our lives.”

“A ritual?” You stared at him. “You mean you want to turn me into a demon?”

“Its not as bad as the humans believe.”

“I believe that too!” You pulled away, filled with a sickening dread. Some part of you had realized this, but it was horrifying to hear it from his lips nevertheless. “I’m not going to turn into a demon, Chuuya! You can’t do that to me.”

“Why not?” He laughed bitterly. “You think you’re still purely a human?”

“I’m not… changed.” Your eyes filled with tears as you met his gaze. “I may have been with you, but I’m still me.”

“And you think that’s all you’ve done?” He loomed over you suddenly, the room seeming to fill with shadows. Flickers of red ran up his face and down his chest and arms, reflecting the red in his eyes. “You’ve eaten demon food, taken a demon’s seed inside you.” He raised his arm, showing you a thin scar that ran along its length. “You’ve drank my blood.”

Your blood ran cold at the sight. “No,” you said hoarsely. “Even then, I—I’m not a demon.”

Chuuya’s mouth tightened. You shrank back, terrified, only for him to pull away abruptly. “Fine,” he said, getting off the bed. “If you want to go home so bad, then let’s go home.”

“Wait, I’m sorry!” You sat up, alarmed. “Wait, please, I–I—"

“What?” He turned to you. “I thought you wanted to see your family.”

“I do, but…”

“I’m not going to hurt them, [Y/N].” He smiled, a rictus snarl. “I promise. Now come here.”

Something in his words made your hair stand on end “Yes, m—my lord,” you said, hurrying towards him.

“I’ve told you, [Y/N].” He wrapped his arms around you, pressing a hand over your eyes. “Call me Chuuya.”

The air changed. It grew cold. The wind rustled your hair, making you blink. As Chuuya pulled his hand away, you looked around, eyes smarting from the chill in the air.

You were standing on a hill overlooking a glittering city.

“Where are we?” you asked, voice trembling.

“Don’t you recognize it?” Chuuya waved a hand at the town laid out below. “Your village.”

“But—” You took a step forward, peering down at the twinkling network of lights. “No, it’s not. My village was pretty small. That is some great city.”

“That is a small place compared to the cities of today. But maybe you need more convincing.” He grasped your hand again, and in the blink of an eye you were standing in front of a shrine. Your village’s shrine.

But it was changed. Lichen covered the gates, moss creeping through the cracks in the ground. But more than that was the tall light that stood just outside the gate, a little flat plate just beneath it. 

“It – those lights,” you said. “Those are the lights from your palace.”

“They’re called electric lights, and they’re not exclusive to my palace.” Chuuya crossed his arms. “The world has moved on, [Y/N]. It’s been a couple of hundred years since I took you, give or take a decade.”

“No!” You turned to him, aghast. “No, it – you’re lying!”

“Well, you’re welcome to go down into town and ask people, if you don’t believe me. Or read that plaque over there. Or even wander the world if that’s what you want. But you’ll find that I’m tellin’ the truth. You’ve been my wife for over two hundred years now.”

“No!” You turned a full circle, scanning the scene for someone, something, to prove him wrong. Your eyes met Chuuya’s, and the pain and resignation in them made you pause. “You’re… not lying,” you said blankly.

“No.” He shook his head with a small smile. “I wouldn’t lie to you, [Y/N], it’s not my style. I’d have told you outright if your family was around – I’m not afraid of any of them, no one will ever keep you from me. But they’re not there anymore.”

“But – why?” You sank to the leaf-strewn ground, shaking, your vision blurry with tears. “Why would you do to me?”

“Because you are not listening to me.” Chuuya sank to his knees beside you, embracing you. “You’re mine. You belong to me. You were always meant to be with me. You just needed to lose everything to understand that.”

[scretladyspider]

I want to talk about the definition of demisexuality and why I think in an allocentric world it leads to misunderstandings like this.

Quoted by Cluffalo tweet is about demisexuality. Tweet reads: “Can we stop making everything into an “orientation"?This is normal, healthy, female sexualityWanting to immediately sleep with someone because they're hot is not the default for women.”

Okay, so… demisexuality is “not experiencing sexual attraction unless a close bond is formed”. It was invented over a few years of discussions on AVEN forums about a sort of in-between ace experience, between asexual and allosexual. Graysexual came about around the same time.

The most common criticisms of demisexuality include that it was invented for a role play, that it’s “just normal”, that it’s “just how women are”, or that its especially puritan, assigning superiority to not liking or not having casual sex. And while all of these are worth a deep dive… I want to talk about how we define demisexuality, and why I think it’s both helpful but also leaves some pretty big holes in understanding that leads to posts like that original tweet.

When you’re explaining anything under the asexual spectrum, you generally have to assume that they’ve never heard of asexuality. It doesn’t matter if they are or aren’t ace and don’t know it when we’re told our whole lives that asexuality isn’t a possibility. As much as I don’t want to center the allosexual experience when discussing demisexuality (or anything ace), and I really, really don’t, it ends up being the inevitable reference point when talking about anything ace.

Actually, really understanding the definition of demisexuality requires understanding and accepting asexuality, the asexual spectrum, action not necessarily equating with attraction, arousal VS attraction, libido, and unpacking what we’re taught sexuality is or could be. Demisexuality requires all kinds of knowledge about asexuality to even begin to understand that there IS a difference between waiting to have sex with your partner and not experiencing any sexual attraction at all, to anyone, ever, until and unless a close bond forms, IF then.

The way the “no sexual attraction until a close bond is formed” definition of demisexuality is set up currently sounds like it’s describing building trust with someone before engaging in sex from an allosexual perspective.

In my experience, people can more easily accept that some people don’t experience sexual attraction than they can that some people might experience it, maybe, under select circumstances. That takes more unpacking allonormativity and amatanormativity.

But if you know about and understand asexuality, it’s not difficult to go from the “little to no sexual attraction” that we usually think of as “no sexual attraction” when we talk about asexuality to understanding where and how the “little to” specifically comes into that.

However! If you know what asexuality is, then the definition of demisexuality as we currently write it, as in the OP’s post, is perfectly adequate and can even be liberating, especially if you’ve been trying to figure out why you usually but don’t *always fit into “no sexual attraction”.

I’m tired of explaining over and over the same thing, trying to find new ways to do that. If I can be vulnerable a second, a lot of the time it feels pointless, like, “why am I even doing this?”

And I’m sure I’m not the only person talking about asexuality that feels that way.

Also a lot of the “demisexuality is just being a woman” narrative typically overlaps with transphobia, and folks who say this tend to attribute who they’re referring to as “just being a woman” to whiteness, which again circles everything back to purity culture.

I haven’t yet found a way to explain demisexuality without basically writing a book. Tbh I don’t know that there is a way to briefly and adequately explain demisexuality, as it rests on understanding asexuality, which I know from experience I can’t just assume is the audience. And I don’t really have any solutions or answers to this. I don’t have a new and quick demisexuality definition ready to go. As is, if you understand asexuality, it’s fine, but if you don’t, it’s like… yeah, I understand why people get confused. I used to too. Demisexuality is a real thing. But I am frustrated and tired by how it takes a PowerPoint or dissertation to explain— not just for myself, but any demisexual, because there’s so much around it you have to explain first.

So… those are just some thoughts. I don’t have a solution? I’ve been just thinking about all this for… a long time actually. I wish more people knew about and understood asexuality. it would help. Not just with this, but, this would be something it helped with.

But, yeah! Those were thoughts. I don’t know how to end this thread. Uhm. Okay bye thanks for reading have a nice day

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[batmanisagatewaydrug]

Tumblr won’t stop recommending me terf posts no matter how many tags I block. Got recommended this one last night, and it really upset me. As a sexpert, what are your thoughts on this shit take? I went on their blog and they kept citing this study as proof that “fetishes and paraphilias are a choice.” I know there’s a lot of scientific intrigue into what causes fetishes, but I find it beyond ignorant and infuriating that this person is comparing fetishes as innocuous as bondage and feet to fucking pedophilia.

well the thing about that study is that, while it's interesting that male rats could be trained to prefer sex with female rats in little jackets (and the use of the phrase "virgin male rats" in the linked article is extremely funny) I guess that as a sex educator and also as a person my main objection to extrapolating this information to humans is that the average human brain is just a little itty bit more complex than a rat's.

(and even allowing for that I question how their takeaway from that study is "fetishes are a choice" and not "fetishes are the result of a combination of factors influencing our lives that we'll probably never be able to fully understand," in much the same way that those rats definitely never understood why the giants who cared for them were so invested in getting them to associate tiny jackets with fucking.)

it's also just really interesting to see where these kinds of people draw the line on what kind of sex is permissible, and how often "acceptable" sex ends up sounding a lot like an old timey puritan minister telling the congregation that they'll go to hell if they have sex in any position other than missionary and also will still go to hell if they enjoy missionary too much. "you could literally just choose not to succumb to your own degenerate desires" okay wow didn't realize fucking Claude Frollo was on tumblr.

idk man there's not a lot to say here other than transphobia is a fundamentally conservative sentiment and conservative ideas flock together; the hatred of sexual expression in transphobe communities runs RAMPANT and is undiscerning. it's a very fearful ideology.

[th3-0bjectivist]

Dear listener, every year I run a fine-tooth comb over the internet to discover one ‘new’ type of music that is without a doubt… good batshit. I have long maintained that there are two kinds of bat guano in music: good batshit and bad batshit. If it’s passionate, experimental, entertaining, bizarre, and scares the piss out of modern puritans… that’s nutrient-rich good batshit! If it’s totally derivative of other acts, openly preachy, and flat-out boring all while desperately trying to be edgy… that’s a festering pile of bad batshit. This week, I’m going to expose you to music by Machine Girl. Smash play on the track just above, it’s a music video for their song Ginger Claps on their 2014 album Wlfgrl. If it doesn't freak you out too much, join me down below for more!

In 2024, I've been looking for gym jams. Y'know, utterly chaotic music you can listen to at the gym that makes you work out harder and longer than usual!? I happen to work with a group of young guys, and they always have the weirdest music playing in the workstation area. Being an old man compared to the pups, I often laugh or cringe at their screamo, emo violence and metalcore garbage. In just the last fortnight or so, I was passing through the workstation area and heard a very peculiar and strangely attractive sound. It reminded me of a hybrid between Aphex Twin and KMFDM. So, I memorized the band name, showed up at the gym to sample their tracks, and ended up staying on the treadmill for an extra hour as my ear canals climaxed at this fast-paced new sound. Their tunes made my body move, and how! I basically just started listening to this duo from Long Island, NY, so I'm hardly a subject matter expert, but despite my best efforts, I just can’t stop sampling this eery and tasty batshit! I can plainly state I have not heard a single other musical act that sounds exactly like this, and as of this posting I will declare it to be the most chaotic music I’ve ever installed on my blog. But there is an order to this chaos, as it is fundamentally rooted in the structures and schools of punk, digital hardcore, rave and industrial. Talk about a messy emotional ride; in some instances, their individual tunes are like listening to 10-20 soundscapes mashed into one 3-minute track. Apparently, if you listen to their tunes deep enough, you’ll find themes of gender identity, sexuality and a criticism of capitalism. So, if you’re into those themes, have at it! Me!? I'm just here for the extremely crazy breakbeats and the total experimental experience they have to offer. Just below, you’ll find Necro Culture Vulture from their 2020 album The Ugly Art. Especially if you’re a fitness-inspired gym rat like me these days, try this batshit on for size when you’re on the tread, it’ll all suddenly make sense if it hasn’t already!

This year, this is the most creative and inspiring new-to-my ears music I’ve had the good fortune to stumble across. I commend them for their explosive tracks that rapidly ascend into something akin to an epic score right out of a modern AAA video game. It’s music that literally sounds like it was produced by extraterrestrials from another dimension. Fuck-to-the-yeah! Image source: https://www.revolvermag.com/music/machine-girl-alien-music-duo-spitting-blood-mashing-genres-transcending-self

[ivyial]

Okay, I just saw your other ask about leshley/eagleone and felt like I had to get in on this because ever since RE4Make came out, I've been going crazy over this ship. I have always found it cute in RE4 OG, but now it's driving me crazy. I cannot understand how many people miss the many implications that Leon is trying to flirt during certain parts of the game. Like seriously, come on, pals, he's being so awkward, trying to sound cool and give compliments that end up sounding weirder than he intended. And I don't know if it's just me that noticed this, but I find it funny how Leon talks to Ashley in certain moments like it's the easiest thing to do; then, in other parts, he really has no clue how to speak to her. Does that not scream attraction to anyone?

i'm with you on this one. i don't know how people miss EVERYTHING about them. like they don't even go "oh?" at times when they're playing. it probably depends on the mindset you have when you're playing. if you're hyperfocused on the action, maybe you'll miss it. idk. on social media, there are two broad types of people who have negative reactions when it comes to leon/ashley:

1. aeon shippers (mostly, can be other shippers as well, but they're mostly chill because they themselves get forced into a corner by aeon stans) who think it threatens their ship

2. people who are fiercely anti-romance when it comes to whatever media they consume and consider it to be dumb and actively making a good piece of media worse (because in their eyes, romance is a lowly preoccupation to have)

and both groups are super bitter for no reason lmaoooo. you might have noticed a tendency in media discourse recently on social media that is very anti-romance - a few weeks ago, it became a whole thing on twitter because of the bear (the tv show) and the ship between sydney and carmy, to the point where even official media outlets started talking about it. romance is considered dumb. everything that contains romance is essentially a bad soap opera. blah blah blah we're all too smart for that. there's a very strong, almost puritanical anti-sex sentiment going around at the moment as well, and i wish it was just some isolated issue within fandoms overpopulated by young teens, but people lost their minds over two sex scenes in oppenheimer for god's sake. and if i had the time and willpower and knowledge, i'd turn this into a discussion about how that ties into humans being obsessed with moving away from every single instinct that they have, but well.

i also agree with the second part of your ask, about leon's attitude towards ashley. tbh, leon can't flirt for shit: most of the time, he's awkward (RE2R, the fence scene with claire: i can never tell if he's attempting to flirt, or if he's just awkward because there's a cute girl right in front of him) or even downright unfunny (was he trying to flirt with jill in death island? was he trying to lighten the mood? idk man leon is a bit of a whore so). he tries to flirt all the time: we got shen may in infinite darkness, ada, etc. we know he isn't smooth.

so one thing that really sticks out in RE4R is his tone with ashley, in two specific instances (maybe more): the one i mentioned in my previous ask, when he says "i can catch you", and when he sees ashley asleep on the bed in chapter 13 (and calls out to her). these are two very intense and high-stress situations where he kind of reverts back to RE2R leon (nick does a great job at conveying the difference in maturity in leon's voice in both games). he's very distressed. why does that matter? because fucking shouting ashley's name when there are two enemies 10 meters away (we know that, he doesn't, but the island is riddled with ganados, so why would he even try?) is the stupidest decision a special agent could make. and yet he does it anyway. there are other instances of leon being in a similar situation, yet he still retains that deeper tone of his - see his first encounter with krauser in chapter 11.

and it's not just because he's doing his job, which is what one of my friends argued, because you don't go around flirting with the person you're tasked to rescue for shits and giggles. not to mention, that's the president's daughter. if he was just doing his job, he'd stick to the plan, be stoic and get her home and that's it. that's what's required of him. implying that the first daughter is hot as fuck and that he doesn't usually enjoy his regular missions nearly as much as he does when he's with her isn't part of his job description. there's a difference between being a decent guy and not treating her like cargo, and overtly flirting with her.

i think he's also very awkward with her at first because he's toeing the line between what's acceptable and what isn't, so he can figure out if there is grounds for flirting and it's not wholly unwanted on ashley's part. then you get that pep talk in the castle, which is when they really start to get comfortable with each other and when he attempts some physical contact that isn't just 100% necessary. she reacts well, which explains why he takes it further in chapter 9. he spends the rest of the game painfully distressed and by chapter 16, they're all over each other (jetski + taking her hand to run to the elevator - leon, the girl is smart, she knows how to run and follow you).

leon has a crush. plain and simple. he doesn't know how to deal with it, except for the few times when he does and the flirting is technically reciprocated. idk how people can't notice the plain signs of attraction, even in a generation that is as recluse and introverted as mine tends to be, but they're very obvious once you start paying attention.

[crystallinestars]

Hello again, it's been a while! (since the last rants after the homophobia thing haha) I just wanted to send you and all the previous anons much love and support! I also hope that all these discussions will be seen as the humble brainstorming / sharing of experiences and ideas that they are.

As for all that was discussed before (loved the rants btw), I've said it before and I'll say it again: many people don't see stories as carefully woven threads / creative tools made by humans, they see it as tropes and mirrors. I feel like at some point experiencing stories has stopped being about "how do these things connect and what kind of interpretations can you draw from the source?" to become "what does this story says about / how can I make this story about me, myself & I?". And it doesn't help that this take echos one of the most common (but also very cliché ngl) thing that can be said about what a story is (I think we've all heard something like "stories help us learn things about ourselves").

If we go from there, what can you say to someone who sees their reflection in a story without looking or sounding like the "bad guy"? After all, how dare others question one's identity? Surely they must be some kind of puritan evil and a "x-phobe"!

I saw discussions on Twitter saying a few years ago that some people have cannibalized "leftist" jargons so much that they end up sounding like the very conservative they're trying to push back against and now "social justice" in many communities (esp in fandoms) is used as a weapon to police what everyone does in their corner, even if they're not bothering anyone else. It's too bad imo that in the court of social justice and its jargon, bullying and harrassment aren't treated as serious offenses, but I digress 🤷🏻‍♀️

Going back to the "people love tropes" thing, while I find it sad that it often seems they do not see anything beyond these tropes, a huge part of the blame definitely lies with the creators / companies providing this content. I agree with you 1000% that Mihoyo knew what they were doing with Alhaitham and Kaveh, what with how popular the phrase "and they were roommates!" has become. This is also why I hate when fandoms tell people like the bi anon for example that they should just "find other people like them in the community <3", because it essentially means "go be a killjoy somewhere else and spend your time dodging the content you don't want to see". I'm also not a big fan of popular fandom activties (shipping being at the top of the list, even if technically I don't mind hearing people talk about their hcs and interpretations, so long as they do it respectfully) so I understand how restrictive the experience can be.

And finally, the Kaveh situation. Both you and the anon made great points and frankly? Thank you so much for addressing all these things! Nothing irks me more than people going "omg x behaviour / outfit is SOO gay". I know it's supposed to be a facetious little joke originally and I'm also not here to bring justice to the pixels, but after hearing this so many times I'm starting to believe that many people genuinely think that you can identify a person's orientation just by looking at them. What happened to "traditional / straight men should embrace their 'femenine' side"? Idk, I think about this a lot and I've yet to truly gather my thoughts on the subject, but I do feel like this way of going about these things is a slippery slope leading straight into stereotyping territory.

Also, I feel you both when you say you don't think kavetham is a viable ship. It's of course a matter of taste and people are definitely allowed to play with different dynamics (healthy or not). I just think it's also a case of latching onto a trope (opposites attract maybe) and rolling with it. I've been friends with people whose personalities were drastically different from mine, and while it was fulfilling because we were constantly challenged by each other, let me tell you that this constant was also EXHAUSTING, to the point that it sometimes felt like having to walk on eggshells to keep the balance stable. So yeah, while I can see the appeal in a ship like kavetham, I'm not a fan. I could enjoy it if people focused more on the fragility and vulnerability that such a relationship can create, but alas. I suppose top/bottom discouse brings much more instant gratification.

Anyway, I think the girlies here (and all those who wish to join) should form an alliance and keep doing their things away from the drama. I'm really glad that your blog is a safe space to vent and talk about these things 💜

Glad to see you again, Anon! 💚

I never imagined that stating I'm not into BL in my bio would spark so much discussion on the topic of modern fandom culture. Not that I mind since I enjoy talking about these things, but it does make me wonder if there should be a dedicated space for it so everyone can talk about it together. In the meantime, I am more than happy to be a safe space for others to vent their frustrations and share their opinions on the topic 😊

We talked before about how people project themselves onto stories and characters, and you also made a really good addition to this that I haven't thought of before. It does seem like people stopped interpreting stories for their message/idea, and are now using it as a way to validate themselves instead. It makes me wonder what it is about modern Western culture that's pushing people to project so heavily onto entertainment media.

I won't comment too much on political jargon since I am not American, and oftentimes struggle to understand American politics. One thing I have noticed, though, is that a lot of Americans view everything around them through a political lens, even when said thing or person has nothing to do with politics. They jump to conclusions about where on the political spectrum said thing or person lies based on whether it aligns with their views, and then judge it to be either good or bad. No in-between.

And I also agree that the social justice camp has done a 180, and went from promoting equality and acceptance, to now policing everyone who doesn't adhere to their strict views of what is morally correct. It has led to a rejection of equality. I also wonder why these people feel the need to police everyone around them. Are they trying to make up for something deep down?

I am also very thankful to the anon for opening discussion on the issue of people assuming character sexuality based on physical attributes or behaviors. As we talked at length prior, the term "coding" is being thrown around everywhere to justify people's headcanons about characters. We've gone past sliding down the slope of stereotyping, because I've seen people use stereotypes to describe characters, and parade them as proof that the character is gay-coded.

For example, I saw someone say Kaveh is gay-coded because he whines and complains a lot, dresses feminine, and shows no interest in women (Said person also said a lot of other WILD things to try and defend their point. It was one of the most surreal conversations I've ever had). Some of this stereotyping started out as a joke, as you said, but lately it doesn't feel like a joke anymore.

Glad you are also of the opinion that Kaveh and Haitham wouldn't make a good romantic couple! Every time I see someone compile a list of how they're designed as a pair, and therefore meant to be lovers, I want to write a list stating why their personalities wouldn't make them work. Or if they do start dating, then why it would inevitably fall apart. But I digress.

I feel you when you say you've been friends with someone who is your polar opposite, and how difficult it can be. Though I wouldn't even call us friends because we are just too different to understand each other's point of view. It's frustrating and exhausting, for sure, which is why I commend you for being able to keep a friendship going.

Sorry for writing so much. I thought I would write less, but somehow I never can.

Thank you for stopping by and sharing your thoughts with us! It's definitely encouraging and vindicating knowing there are others who share our views out there.

[crusherthedoctor]

Like a lot of sane people, I'm not a purity policeman, nor do I condone that mindset. There's stuff I might personally find kinda sus as the cool kids say depending on the context, and I might raise an eyebrow when folk get perhaps a bit too aggressively defensive about whichever sus things, but as long as no one in real life is harmed over it, that's what matters.

Unfortunately, because of the otherwise understandable drive to combat the Twitter puritan mentality, many of the rants I've seen about it on this site are starting to sound similarly preachy despite the opposite scale. Moralizing about the moralizing, if you get me. So many discussions about all kinds of media become a moral debate one way or the other, any like or dislike for a work is inherently filled with secret messed up implications that say something problematic about you as a person one way or the other. Back and forth, back and forth, lines getting blurry.

And like, I know there's probably limited options to criticise moral crusaders without coming off like that at least a little, but after so long, it's as if some folk have become their own antithesis in a way. It's a weird situation for me because my stance on the whole thing is exactly what I said above, and nothing more. I don't see a need to respond to people who dig too deep with another flavor of digging too deep, I just acknowledge them as clowns full of shit and laugh at them accordingly.

[neotrances]

god that anon.. 😭 i hate ppl using the word vanilla for ppl who want tender sex as if thats somehow cringe or boring or childish or not Real Enough or whatever. some ppl online make it a sport to look down on ppl who want sex that is tender and loving .like i 100 percent support ppls preferences as long as its respectful n theres informed consent on both sides and so on bla bla and u can have all the problematic sex u want but i do not get why its looked down upon if u dont welcome violence adjacent or more ‘unusual’ acts into ur sex life? again this is not moral judgement on ppl who do welcome that but in so many cases ppl who use the word vanilla to describe someones sex life just sound so misogynist often with racism on top or that bc black women get this treatment way more … agh im bad at expressing myself but wow some of ur anons regularly do my head in i dont know how u survive it

when ppl use vanilla as a insult it tells me they are not a trustable person like no form of consenting sex is “lesser” obviously but its strange that someone saying they donot want violent sex etc is a “lame” thing when the only thing that matters is the consent of both parties, pretending like “vanilla” sex is shameful is extremely bizarre bc most ppl that treat rough or violent sex as default never consult with their partners and help make a culture where women typically r expected to just take any kind of sexual behavior divorced from their needs or wants, idk how they don’t realize they contribute to the widespread misogyny that happens bc of that but it’s also like . me criticizing ur kink won’t kill u, it won’t stop u from doing it again, i am not holding a gun to ur head, if u wanna wear a diaper or have ur partner call u their daughter or want to do rape play nothing i say will prevent u from doing so, but acting like pointing out the negatives from said behavior is some kind of witch hunt from “puritans” that will end with u being jailed is the stupidest thing in the world

[grimgiblog]

Using this blog to collect animation references and post about our hyperfixations. Surprise surprise I really like Victor Saltzpyre as a written character, their voice actor does a phenomenal job, and the Witch Hunter Captain class is just really fun to play.

I will complain and say that the warhammer fanbase being filled with fascists who don't have the braincells to comprehend subtext and parody makes things a bit of a slog.

I will also complain that Saltzpyre is the fruitiest character alive, whose VA developed his voice from gay actor Kenneth Williams. 15:50 in this interview stream.

"And he was very you know, very camp, very gay. And in the days when you weren't allowed to be. When it was illegal. The weird thing it happened in America as well, was it was alright to be kind of camp and you know sound a bit fae and a bit kind of....you know. Gay. But you weren't allowed to be. So homosexuality was illegal. But being funny and camp was okay. And Kenneth Williams used to do this thing where he'd be; at one minute kind of completely London and then go into a whole posh sort of voice like that. And talk to any englishman and they go: yeah man you're just channeling Kenneth Williams."

I notice that in the fanbase where Victor's character, his gay way of being is sort of skewed and interpreted as him being just silly. Lot of meme shit has him as this straight pussy slayer gangster. How they kind of overide such mannerisms as just him being funny and camp. Not that he isn't funny or silly on his own right, but I reflect on how if this very same character was revealed as gay a lot of people who enjoy him probably wouldn't anymore. How the games themselves are littered with both homophobes and lgbt individuals. I think a lot about censorship.

And I think about straight interpretations of the character, which while there are some good bits of fanfic--quite a few of them derive on the nonconsensual. On unhealthy male and female dynamics. I also think of the lack of chemistry involved there. How with Sienna it's considered a "forbidden love" sort of deal, even though, it is in fact: a straight couple. It's not to say that the pairing can't be done well, and not to admonish those who do like it. (It's a dumb funny rat game and none of this matters in the grand scheme of things ship who you want I'm just an old grumpy cuss.) and it will probably be confirmed by the devs to be cannon anyways. But I always saw Victor and Kruber, two soldiers of the empire, one of polytheism and monotheism, sir and subordinate dynamics to be more interesting and barely written about. I want to make more stories and characters following their relationship. I want to write about gay 40 year old men, puritans who haven't experienced love, and big old male sluts who have shagged and been shagged more times than they can count. Of power and subservience and breaking the gender binaries. Of healing and of faggy banter.

There's a lot to explore and writing about them and drawing them has helped me figure out a lot about my own characters I want to write about. As well as what I enjoy and my own homosexuality as well. A lot to ruminate on. Just goes to show what a good game with great writers and actors can do lol.

[yardsards]

can i ask about your experience as a quaker (or growing up as one? i just saw you mention bein one in some tags)

i jus don't know much about them

so i was not raised quaker, i was raised baptist. which was. 0/10, do not recommend. all the guilt of catholicism with none of the stained glass lmaooo

like, i did resinate with the idea of there being some sort of higher power and i liked the idea of getting together with other believers to discuss spiritual matters but as i got older and started thinking for myself i realized i really didn't like a lot of things about the church. i hated the bigoted beliefs of its members. i hated the emphasis on blind obedience to authority. i didn't believe that the whole literal truth could be found within one book, specifically one group's interpretation of said book. and the idea that people were born inherently bad and sinful and that a supposedly kind and just god would condemn people to eternal suffering just for not believing the "right" things just did not sit well with me at all

when i went off to college i decided to try out a few different churches around town. i ended up settling on a progressive presbyterian church. the community was great and very accepting of queer people. i had some minor qualms with the theology but it wasn't like with my parents' church where every sermon made me feel increasingly nauseous, and i generally felt *good* during and after the services

and then covid hit and while they did stream their sermons, i lost that sense of community and just kinda... fell away

throughout all this i was researching different faiths online, both christian and non-christian. and one faith that kept popping up a lot that i liked the sound of was quakerism. like at one point i remember taking some online quiz of like "what religion do your values most align with" and quakerism was very in the lead. (before this, i'd only really been exposed to quakerism in history textbooks and assumed the religion died out alongside puritanism)

in the end what got me really interested was actually a video by a youtuber i liked, a queer/disability advocate and historical fashion enjoyer who also happened to be quaker

and after looking more into it, i decided to try attending a quaker meeting. which was easier due to covid cuz i could find a church online (located physically hundreds of miles from me) that did their sunday services over zoom

and so i attended and the people there were great and were doing actual good in their communities. and the way services were run, and their beliefs about what god *was* and all of that just hit me with an intense feeling of like. holy shit this is what i've always wanted from religion.

the video explains the sort of core beliefs and practices of quakerism better than i can but the main belief is that like. every person is godly. as such, it's our job to treat all living people as equally and kindly as possible. additionally, since we all have god inside of us, we need to look inwards and come to our own conclusions about our own religious beliefs and practices (and generally respect other people's religious beliefs even if they differ from our own, so long as they're not causing real tangible harm)

i haven't attended any meetings in a while, due to that group going back to semi in person (they still stream it out but it feels more like being a spectator than a member) and there being no quaker meetinghouses in the tiny town i currently live in, coinciding with me being too depressed to regularly attend anything. but i'm planning to start attending quaker meetings again once i move to a real city

[firecrackerhh]

Ok I’m really sorry if I’m petty but…ok I’m not really sorry but fuck it I don’t care, I think it’s really fucking annoying when I say shit that sounds a lil mean (the horror!) and then people wanna fucking lecture me about how I should be nicer and I shouldn’t say certain words or how I shouldn’t just assume things about people as if the people I bitch about wouldn’t do the same exact shit to me.

Sorry that I’m not particularly fucking interested in being kind to people who I know would never give me that same courtesy. God forgive me for not turning the other fucking cheek.

Want me to be nice? Maybe the people I bitch about should consider, yknow, not being whiny entitled bitches with the media literacy of a fucking corpse and the emotional stability of a fucking newborn baby.

Like I need to be fucking lectured to about my behavior from fucking strangers. Like I don’t get that shit enough in real life, God fucking spare me from the ever eternal suffering that is my wretched life.

And it’s not like I don’t get where these people are coming from, but for Christ sakes man, it’s not like I’m going to these people’s blogs and directly telling them the shit I think, if I was, that would be different. If someone I talk shit about saw my blog I get THEY would be upset, but like…goddamnit man if OTHER people can do it all the time, if THEY can say WHATEVER THE FUCK THEY WANT and THEY get no fucking pushback, why the fuck can’t I!?

We get called horny freaks who need to go to therapy by a bunch of fucking puritans and suddenly my generalizing is a problem when assuming that every person who fucks is a “freak” and needs to go to therapy is also yknow, ALSO generalizing!? Why aren’t you bitching at them!?

Antis insult us fucking constantly and probably also call us retards but the second I call them that everyone wants to act like my use of the word is suddenly a fucking problem? Why is it the antis can be fucking pricks but god fucking forbid I act the same way or everyone wants to cry like a fucking baby as if my bitching and whining does Jack shit anyway!?

Like I dunno, I just feel like there’s some double standards here, I get this fandom gets a bad rap and all but it’s not like there’s anything we can do to make people think different so what’s it matter if a few of us have had enough of people’s fucking shit? I’m not gonna waste my time trying to be nice to these fucking people, and neither should you!

I dunno man up to a point all I can muster as a response is boo hoo, you poor thing, get over it. Sorry if that isn’t nice, but I’m over that shit.

[racefortheironthrone]

So what were the actual politics of the Hussites historically? I always find medieval heresies interesting but it feels like the discussion of "proto protestant" heresies in popularly available books tends to focus in on how much they actually were like later protestantism. Rather than taking them up on their own terms and actions. It seems interesting with the influence they took from Wycliffe, while actually being much more the motivating ideology for the revolt of the lower orders than Wycliffe's own beliefs were.

It's a bit tricky to analyze the "actual politics" of the Hussites of the Bohemian Reformation, because one of the things you come to understand about the Reformation, Counter-Reformation, the Wars of Religion, etc. is that religious symbolism can have really significant cultural politics in ways that can be very opaque and hard to understand for modern audiences.

(Take this as a strong hint for someone to ask me about how the Puritans of the English Civil War and colonial New England are completely misunderstood, especially on Tumblr.)

So leaving aside Jan Hus' broadly Wycliffian/proto-Lutheran position on religious issues like the need to fight corruption in the Church, the authority of the Bible over the Pope, opposition to indulgences, the critical importance of the vernacular Bible, and so forth - what were the politics of the Hussite movement?

Well, the Four Articles of Prague I think serve as a pretty good condensation of Hussite politics, although it's important to keep in mind that it was a political statement of the more conservative faction of the Hussites:

Freedom to preach the Word of God.

Freedom of the communion of the chalice (under both kinds also to laity).

Exclusion of the clergy from large temporal possessions or civil authority.

Strict repression and punishment of mortal public sins, whether in clergy or in laity.

So all of this sounds like it's more theology than politics, but if we analyze it, we can find the politics under the hood. Taking the first point, the Hussite movement was largely inspired by a popular revulsion to the Council of Constance burning Jan Hus at the stake despite the promise of safe conduct - so in reaction, they seemed to adopt a strong commitment to religious free speech.

Second, there is a strong emphasis on anti-clericalism: by the Middle Ages, the Catholic Church had come to emphasize the higher social status of the clergy over the laity by changing the ritual of communion such that, while communion in bread was given to the laity, only the priest was allowed communion in wine from the chalice. As a statement of social equality, the Hussites insisted that ordinary people should receive both forms of communion - and went one step further by insisting that children as well as adults should receive both - as a statement of the equality of all men before God.

Third, there is a strong dislike of Church corruption, which tended to emphasize the need for the clergy to devote themselves to poverty and spiritual matters rather than secular politics and moneymaking.

The more radical Hussites wanted to confiscate church lands and transfer them to secular hands, they believed that the Bible was the only authority for both religious and political matters, and they were very strict Biblical literalists who particularly emphasized Wycliffe's denial of transubstantion. In general, they tended to believe that society should be more democratic.

Finally, there's a strong element of Czech proto-nationalism: hence the emphasis on translating the Bible into Czech, and the successful defense of their religious independence during the Hussite Wars, where the Hussites took on the Pope (several Popes declared no less than five Crusades against the Hussite heretics), the Holy Roman Emperor, and the King of Bohemia in the Hussite Wars - and ultimately won, forcing the Catholic Church to recognize the Moravian Church.

(This is something of a simplification of a very complicated conflict, because there was also a civil war between the more conservative and more radical Hussites that saw the radicals militarily defeated and their church disbanded.)

[darkmatter-nebula]

An angsty one shot of Colli being badly hurt by Belos while he’s on the draining chair

Greetings! Thank you for the request!

I apologize for not writing it earlier, my dear anon. My day was, unfortunately, very shitty again. *sigh*

This takes place a few years before Colli was found and saved by Luz and King.

Drabble: The Tortured Little Boy

Emporer Belos had a gleeful expression on his face as he beat up a certain small starboy with a heart as pure as freshly fallen snow and otherwordly fluffy lavender hair. The little boy, later known as Colli, had a lot of abuse to endure.

Colli's dark blue blood was dripping to the floor of the secret chamber. His natural regeneration was weakened, thanks to all these years on the Draining Chair as Belos' living battery. The kind and sweet eternal little boy fell unconcious.

"Look at you, my Little Battery. So bloody and beaten. What a beautiful sight. This punishment was your own fault. You should cry less." The sadistic Emporer said as he put his hand on the blue side of Colli's adorable multi-colored face.

Unfortunately, Colli couldn't stop crying. The Draining Chair caused him so much pain. Then, Belos left the secret chamber. The man had a lot of things to do. "See you later, boy. Next time, your punishment will be worse."

.

.

.

A few days later, Belos visited Colli again. This time he held a dagger in his hand and slit Colli's throat! The same dagger he used to kill his brother Caleb all these centuries ago. The cosmic little boy let out some horrible noises as the wound very slowly began to heal. "What a beautiful sound. Truly melodic." Belos said surprisingly gentle.

Belos knew very well about Colli's immortality. The puritan used this fact to be extra sadistic towards him. Belos couldn't resist and licked the blood off the dagger. "Your taste is truly delicious, my Little Battery." He said.

The wound finally healed up. Belos wanted to hurt Colli more. He wrapped his hands around Colli's healed up throat and squeezed as hard as possible. Belos' icy blue eyes were practically sparkling as he was choking him.

"It's such a glee to have an immortal victim. No matter how much I hurt you, nothing can kill you." Belos put his hand on Colli's head and ruffled the immortal celestial boy's otherwordly fluffy lavender hair. "I will make you suffer so much more!" The ruler of the Boiling Isles grinned.

The End

[myopicry]

I'm not sure if that's gonna make sense but I was in ace/aro circles a while back (I hadn't unpacked a ton of stuff about how I was objectified in my relationships) and I really dislike the food comparison. Like no matter how they spin it to me it always sounds like some incel thing about how "allo people NEED to have sex unlike us". Not to judge but idk tumblr feels like a bunch of people who lived in very puritanical environments all put in a room together and they're all trying to look more sexually liberated than the other in wrong ways. I feel like this about how they constantly defend prostitution and onlyfans uncritically, or kinks and everything. I feel like whenever you point out the misogyny in what they think they take it personally because of all this. Hopefully this rambling made a tiny bit of sense.

yeah this is very real !! don't worry this makes a lot of sense to me, thank you for the ask!

I've also noticed in aroace spaces there is a narrative around allosexual people as if they constantly measure everyone they meet as a possible sexual prospect, when most people who aren't aro and/or ace definitely do not think like that. most people are pretty normal, and you can usually fit them into some kind of general sexuality like lesbian, gay, bisexual or straight. I think maybe aroace spaces just tend to internalize the myth of sex "hungry" allos due to confirmation bias and mostly only noticing allo people who do behave like that (usually people-well, usually men-who are really into porn and kink) since they're really loud about it.

and I think sexual attraction is complicated! but not in the "we need a million microlabels to fit into a community for some reason" but in the "human sexuality manifests differently for everyone because everyone is their own unique person and is influenced by different experiences in their lives." I guess some people use microlabels to help them understand their unique sexuality, but man, you have to admit sometimes it's a bit overkill.

I think something funny is that what made me start to shy away from identifying as aroace was because for a sexuality that essentially meant a lack of attraction, they sure liked bringing it up all the time whenever people talked about attraction! which honestly made me self-conscious I was becoming one of those people myself. I love talking, but if I didn't have anything to contribute to a conversation I'd rather... well, not contribute! I sometimes wonder if aroace discussion and community keeps getting pushed into larger lgbt discussion because by itself the lack of something doesn't really have much to discuss or bond over.

sometimes I wish I could radio broadcast a statement about how online community based on identity should not be held to such a high regard, and you should find communities based on more material parts of yourself that actually enrich your life instead of turning into an identity affirming ouroboros. that, and if you're questioning your sexuality, don't watch porn :-|