#not sure if I tag utena or not...
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Milgram and The Rose Bride
(CWs: Child Abuse, Cults, Unhealthy Relationships, Bullying, Sexism, Discussions of Ownership in the context of Marriage, minor mentions of sexual abuse and minor mentions of sexual abuse in relation to Minors)
(Spoilers for Utena!)
Alright so, since I'm putting this on the Milgram blog, most likely most people who see this don't know what the Rose Bride is and what that means so lets answer that question.
The Rose Bride is a concept in the 90s Psychological Shoujo Anime Revolutionary Girl Utena, in which the main premise is that a bunch of highschoolers are dueling for marriage (ownership) of the Rose Bride so that they can revolutionize the world.
Now, the thing is, The Rose Bride is a Real Person, and the implications of her ownership and the environment that Allows for that to happen are explored through the series, and the reason why I'm bringing it up in relation to Milgram is this.
"In the end, all girls are the rose bride."
Let's talk about Mahiru for a bit since her being so focused on romantic love makes it a lot easier to explain what I mean by this.
In T1 we get this interrogation from Mahiru:
T1Q20: What do you think about smoking? I've never smoked before, but I might copy him if who I love smokes.
This is a deeply concerning sentence, Mahiru has just stated that she is willing to do something incredibly physical destructive to herself if the person she loves is doing the same. This connects back to her thoughts on having "matching love."
We fought sometimes, I was happy to get hurt Let's have matching pain, this sickness is pretty bad This is a claim of responsibility From the two of us with matching love
Now, the Rose Bride has to anything the person who is engaged to her tells her to do. The Rose Bride is not allowed any sort of Autonomy or Agency.
(Transcript Link for Utena Scripts)
Touga: The Rose Bride, cooking? Touga: You shouldn't do such things as cooking. Touga: You should only take care of the roses here. Touga: This birdcage is your territory. Touga: And you are the beautiful little bird which lives here. Touga: I want to possess this birdcage, and everything in it.
Touga: Himemiya Anthy is the Bride of the victor of the Duel. Touga: While she was engaged to you, the Code required her to obey you.
I Love You:
What am I supposed to do now? If you won’t tell me, I can’t be me
Mahiru is also probably the most traditionally feminine out of the entire female cast. With her priorities being love, romance, and having children.
(Mahiru Interrogation)
T2Q1: What's your opinion on Marriage? Mahiru: It's something I really dream of.
T2Q10: Do you like children? Mahiru: Yup. I always dreamed of having the older being a girl, and the younger being a boy.
Mahiru is willing to do Anything for love, even if it gets her hurt in the process. That's what she's Supposed to want, that's what is Supposed to bring her joy, that's what is Supposed to bring everyone joy. (Mahiru T1 VD)
Es: I honestly have no interest in those matters. Mahiru: What? No, no. There’s no such thing as that. Being in love is like a landmine. It’ll explode someday, you know? The only thing that differs is whether it happens earlier or later in life. It’ll happen to you too. Even if you don’t have any interest in it now, one day it’ll explode for you as well. All because you’ll have that fateful encounter with your special someone.
Love is what Everyone Wants and if you say you Don't you just haven't found the right person.
Mahiru: Yeah, yeah. You’ll deny it at first. I mean, I was like that as well. Before then, I always admired soap operas and shoujo manga because I thought that they depicted a world different from our own.
Voice: Once upon a time... Voice: ...there was a princess grieving over the deaths of her mother and father. Voice: Before this princess appeared a prince traveling upon a white horse. Voice: His appearance gallant, and his smile gentle, the prince enveloped the princess
The amatonormativity in Mahiru's worldview is clear. People are Supposed to fall in love and have the Normal Idealized Heterosexual Romance and there's Nothing Else Outside of That At All.
Mahiru: Yeah, yeah. You’ll deny it at first. I mean, I was like that as well.
Anthy: But I've been engaged to you, Utena-sama. Utena: I've told you to stop mentioning stuff like "engagement" and the "Rose Bride." Anthy: Nevertheless... Utena: Look, no matter how you look at me, I'm a regular wholesome girl. Utena: I'm only interested in wholesome boys, not a bride or stuff like that.
And Mahiru does a lot to preserve a "marketable" quality to her actions and behavior. TIHTBILWY is formatted like a magazine, something that is sold and bought by consumers. Erasing the messiness of her relationship or even Romanticizing those qualities to seem appealing.
Giving you love to the point of pulling you down It's just because I still get worried, please forgive me Even when I test you, even the times we do the breakup ritual, Is because I love you
Voice: but because of the strength of her admiration for the prince, Voice: the princess made up her mind to become a prince herself! Voice: But is that really good for her?
The story of the Prince in Utena is one that is a fabrication, it hides and excludes multiple Very Important parts of the story all in the favor of portraying the Ideal Fairytale Heterosexual Romance.
Unlike Utena who chooses to become a "Prince" (which is a concept I'll get into in a bit.) Mahiru is trying to make Herself the Rose Bride. She orientates her life around who she loves, she's willing to accept a lot of abuse for the sake of an Ideal Relationship, she even actively downplays her intelligence and strength! Something that is explored in detail by this post by archivalofsins you should check out.
Now that isn't to say Mahiru isn't a horrible partner. She is, and this is why. Mahiru is Expecting this sort of incredibly idealistic fairytale romance from her partner, an ideal that no person can possibly live up to without harming the people they care about and themselves!
Do you really think you know what love is? If you do, let's just overheat together The things that I only want to say to you, and the things that I want from you Is love
My emotions are out of control, that’s inconvenient? I don’t care!
You can't live up to this and you shouldn't want to! It's an unrealistic and unachievable ideal with a horrific power imbalance to boot! Yet Mahiru is Trying to conform to these ideals, trying to conform to the unrealistic expectations of women and relationships in society, and that's why she's here in the first place.
"He who believes friendship exists is a fool."
So these toxic and unhealthy ideals and expectations are at the core of Mahiru's character and her situation. But there ideals are perpetuated by an environment that promotes this sort of behavior, one that isn't unique to Mahiru's situation.
Muu Kusunoki is a 16 year old teenage girl who is both a victim of bullying and someone who bullies others for her own gain.
She also might of had a homoromantic relationship with her murder victim.
Let’s meet up inside the pain, a place just for me Postmortem makeup to hide my heart, how to solve it is a secret The stabbing of the little devil’s voice, counterattack being a suicide note “I love YOU”
I wonder who that reminds me of.
I'll get into Shiori in a second, but it's important to note that Muu introduces a concept that's present in Mahiru's story but is particularly present in Muu, the concept of the cycle.
Saionji: No... I was to be the one to rescue her from the coffin this time. Saionji: No! I am the one who will save her this time. The castle said to contain eternity... Saionji: the power to revolutionize the world...
The concept of eternity and nostalgia in Utena tends to be depicted as a coffin, one you need to break out of to grow.
Touga: If the egg's shell does not break, the chick will die without being born. Touga: We are the chick; the egg is the world. Touga: If the world's shell does not break, we will die without being born. Touga: Break the world's shell! Touga-Juri: For the sake of revolutionizing the world!
The duelists want the Rose Bride so that they can gain the power to revolutionize the world. Who she is does not Matter as much as what she can Give Them.
Now, this idea is particularly present in characters like Shidou and Kotoko who position themselves as saviors, not for the benefit of others but for what they Get out of that arrangement, thematically fitting the concept of the prince.
However, Muu is not the prince, she is not a savior. In fact she always positions herself as the victim, as someone pitiful and weak. (Crying B)
Muu: Hey… Prison guard, when you say “I”… Who are you talking about? Es: [breaking down] Muu: Prison guard? Es: [stumbles] Muu: Prison guard. What’s wrong? Prison guard! [shakes Es] Hey! Prison guard! Es: Shut up! Don’t touch me! Muu: [cries] You’re so cruel… I… Even though I was just worried about you… [cries again] I can’t take it anymore. I hate you, prison guard!
Es pain and breakdown is caused by something Muu said, and yet when Es very sharply tells her not to touch them because their uncomfortable with it. Muu immediately starts crying and talking about how much They got hurt because of what they did, when Es is currently unresponsive due to what she did to them, albeit unintentionally.
Muu needs to to be the victim, After Pain shows all the bad things that happened to her and not Any of the bullying she participated in. It's Not My Fault is a whole song about how everything she did was right actually and that everyone else was wrong.
Now, Muu isn't a master manipulator or anything. She's an impulsive 16 year old. If Muu was a master manipulator she wouldn't be here, would she? She'd be still in school taking the honey up as she was before Rei did whatever she did.
Muu gains power by being pitiful and weak so she'll be loved, and by its' very nature it's self-destructive. She cannot be Happy because if she Was this wouldn't work anymore. She Must be in a worse situation, she must be the victim, or else no one would pity and love her.
I am innocent as everybody desires
Juri: You're just like Shiori... Juri: ...cruelly innocent.
Muu cycles from being "weak and pitiful" to being "queenly and powerful" and tends to hurt herself in the process. This attempt at grabbing power and love through pity Harms Muu, and she seems to even be drowning in a lot of self-hatred and self-pity, and is looking for external validation to confirm that she's "good."
But I guess some of it is my faultMaybe it’s ok as it is I want to feel “alive”, is it ok if I breathe?
Hey, what if If I am a bad girl Don’t hate me. Don’t even try to proof from “After Pain”
And, in an attempt to gain power and control, Muu traps herself in a coffin.
Shiori: This is me, the real me! Shiori: And not the underdog that was living a miserable life in the shadow of the bright shining Juri! Shiori: The real me that surpasses the light. Shiori: Yes, this is the me that controls Juri.
But, it isn't all her fault.
Again, Muu really was bullied, horribly so if were judging by her lyrics in After Pain and the sequences we see in it.
If I was gone, If I had just disappeared I overheard, I found out How much I’m not needed
T1Q4: Is there something you hate? Scary people and ghosts. And right now, school.
Muu isn't lying about this, and Rei isn't fully sympathetic either, she did Hurt Muu and Muu really did want to apologize to her.
T1Q9: Do you have apologetic feelings for who you killed? A: The person who did the wrong thing first should apologize.
Shiori: Juri-san was so kind to me. Shiori: But I thought she was kind to me because she looked down on me, Shiori: and that she had pity on me for being plain and useless. Shiori: That's pathetic! Shiori: So I wanted to change my relationship with Juri-san. Shiori: But what I did with him made me more miserable than before. Shiori: I should have wanted it for myself! Shiori: But now... Shiori: Now I'm on equal terms with her. No, I've won! Shiori: I always had a place in Juri-san's heart. Shiori: I'm the winner! Shiori: What shall I do? I'm so delighted to know my friend's secret I almost can't bear it! Shiori: She suffered alone, looking at my picture in secret... Shiori: That was Juri-san? Poor thing! Shiori: No good! It's still no good! Shiori: How could you look at me like that?!Shiori: Why did it all turn out this way?
The school as a whole is letting a horrible environment of bullying and toxicity be left to rot and fester. You Really Can't create a healthy friendship in a world like that, it just won't let you. If your not friends with someone because you gain something from them, you'll suffer.
Muu: Wow, poor thing,.. I’ll teach you! Friends aren’t like that, you know. Rather than using each other for something, we just get along because we’re comfortable around each other. That’s all. Es: Well, I’m sorry about that. Muu: Haruka-kun is really nice! He accepts anything I say, he listens to anything I tell him. For me, that’s really comfortable. Es: And that’s… “friendship”? Muu: What do you mean? Of course we’re friends! Haruka-kun is happy with it, so it only has benefits for both of us! Es: I, as someone who has no friends, can’t judge, of course, but isn’t that just exploitation? Muu: Exploitation…? Um, I don’t really understand, but… I do help him pick out clothes [in return], and I recently gave him a hairpin I didn’t need anymore as a hand-me-down!
Akio: But sincerity by itself changes nothing. Akio: Without power, one finds themself merely depending on others to live.
Jackalope describes this relationship as a "Master-Servant" relationship and it seems like this is the type of friendship Muu is familiar with. She's emulating how her friendships were in school, just with someone else as the servant and her as the master.
T1Q1: What is a friend? A: Someone who properly listens to what I say.
Now this doesn't completely absolve her obviously, what she did was still Very Bad and even though she Breaks the hourglass in her MVs. She doesn't really leave it.
Muu does not want to accept responsibility for her actions, she believes herself to be justified and in the right, even when she has Done Wrong.
This unwillingness to accept when something she did is wrong and the unhealthy environment of Milgram that assigns strict moral value to people's actions and has no nuance in its judgement...leads her back into the cycle she was trapped in.
“A girl who cannot become a princess is doomed to become a witch.”
Now we've tackled the gender roles and horribly toxic cycles and ideals, so, what happens when you Can't work within those confines, or even want to break out of them? Just, hypothetically, if you cannot become a princess (which is everyone because the ideal of a princess is so incredibly unrealistic that anyone who aspires to be it would destroy themselves in the process) or Don't want to be a princess, what happens?
Well.
You become something Other.
Something Evil and Unnatural.
Something that needs to be Punished and Harmed.
So, now, this is where I have to mention that Utena as a show deals with underage sexual abuse, I didn't mention this for the other sections since they were not as relevant to those discussions. However since this section deals with the abuse received by the Rose Bride it feels important to mention.
I will not be referring to it in the context of Amane's due to how we don't have information in the text pointing to Amane being a csa victim. This is for the sake of Tact, as it feels wrong to speculate about it here and I do not feel like I'm the right person to examine this.
It will, again, be mentioned and alluded to, so stay safe and do what's good for your health.
So, Amane Momose is repeatedly dehumanized throughout her story.
This is a consistent theme with her, she is treated as something subhuman and terrifying.
In Purge March, Amane is consistently depicted as scary, threatening, or otherwise evil.
There's even a section in her T2 VD where Amane calls herself "evil," though it is done in a roundabout way while she's talking about Shidou (who I will get to in a bit.)
A: Both pain and illness are trials. According to our teachings, those who run from them are the worst evil there is. That’s one of the four great principles. No matter who you are, that cannot be forgiven. E: What are you…? A: Oh – speaking of which, there is one among the prisoners right now. An evil existence that’s trying to steal people’s trials away from them.
Shadow: The witch roams this world of darkness even now. Shadow: Seeking the young and noble, to sacrifice them anew! Shadow: Surely the light presents an obstacle to the witch, to her dominion over the dark. Shadow: Beware! Beware! She is still somewhere in this world...
Not only that, but Amane is The Cat, a symbol constantly associated with sin and impurity throughout the MVs with Kazui and Yuno.
And is implied to have actually Been asked if she was human by her parents.
(Amane T1 VD)
Amane: Yes. It is only natural for a person(/human) to apologize to another for breaking a promise. Es: … Amane: Why are you looking so doubtful? Are you not human?
I promise! A good girl that keeps a promise is like, mwah!
Amane is not to be considered human, she's even collared and leashed in her Prisoner design, the medal and bow on her outfits in the MVs being another "collar" of sorts.
Amane Needs to be Restrained and Domesticated or else she'll bring harm to the people around her. She isn't good enough to be a "good girl" and seems to Know This.
Only if, only if, only if I could be a good girl
It's always "I can be a better girl" or "I can be a good girl" and not "I am a good girl," and the line above implies its impossible for her to be one. It's not something she can do.
When she gets punished by her parents its to make her a "better girl," and to "change" her into a "good girl." It is love, for they are not leaving her to die as an animal.
(Amane Interrogations)
T2Q9: What does love mean to you? A: To spread mercy with no limits.
But it’s not scary at all, because it’s love I can really think it’s great. See isn’t it a great thing?
Even though these punishments keep on Almost Killing Her!
It's what she needs to go through to be good! And even if she doesn't even believe its possibly anymore what else can she do? Run? Running away from trials is a sin! One of the worst there is! She can't allow herself to be more sullied than she already is.
Plus she knows this is love, she isn't scared anymore, it's childish to be scared of it.
Akio: A child like you can't appreciate my ideals. Akio: The Rose Bride exists because of ideals you don't comprehend.
Plus there's a sort of comfort in it, she knows what happens next. She idealizes Milgram somewhat in T1, believing that it's possible for this world, that resembles her abusive environment so much, could be Good.
Amane: Ah, I am looking forward to it! Seeing whether your judgement will align with that of these higher standards! If that is the case, maybe Milgram would be the right world for us to live in, rather than the outside world! Milgram relies on your judgement, isn’t that right? In that case, you could become the mediator for a far more righteous world!!
There's a comfort in Milgram's strict forgiven/unforgiven verdict system with a (theoretical) possibility of growth! And she later takes comfort in the same religious doctrine that Harmed her when Es does declare her as unforgiven.
If your so used to a situation, even if it harms you, why would you ever want to leave it? It's scarier if you leave it, you don't know what will happen next. At least at home, Amane knows what to do so she can get off a bit longer without getting hurt.
If you become a bad girl, monsters will come out This is the magic that stops that from happening
Akio: Anthy, the sword. Akio: That's right. You're a good girl, Anthy.
Amane's suffered for twelve or so years, an eternity trapped in a coffin. A cycle of abuse and pain and horror and fear. Why would she Ever want to leave it when what she's seen of the outside world is so horrible?
Amane: In fact, there have been people who said that to me. I’ve been told things like, “You’re being deceived.” “You can still make it right now.” “You’re crazy.”
People are always positioning themselves as stronger than her, people are always positioning themselves as smarter than her, people are always positioning themselves as Her Prince.
Shidou: I…… I just don’t understand. If everything about MILGRAM is true…… why did a child like you have to become a murderer? Just imagining what sort of circumstances must have led to that, it makes me so sad…… Amane: ……*sigh*. Is that right. I don’t think I’m going to get along with you, Shidou-san. I don’t agree with the fact you refuse to acknowledge that I have my own free will, and that I should be held accountable for my actions, just because I’m a child. I may have only been alive for 12 years, but all the choices I’ve made, even if they weren’t the best ones, were entirely my own. What point is there in you getting sad when I have no regrets myself? ……please give me back my test. It seems you don’t have the concentration levels required to be my teacher. I’m going to get Kotoko-san to teach me instead. Shidou: Amane…… I don’t think that’s true. However smart you may be…… you’re still just a child.
Utena: Cut it out with that "Rose Bride" or "possession" nonsense. Utena: That girl is an ordinary girl named Himemiya Anthy! Touga: Is she? Touga: Is it true that you're an ordinary girl? Utena: You don't like it, do you? Utena: Being the Rose Bride or whatever... Anthy: I... Utena: Go ahead, speak your mind! Anthy: My mind... Utena: Yeah! Utena: You hate being treated as the Rose Bride, right? Utena: Tell him clearly! Anthy: All right. Anthy: I hate being treated as the Rose Bride. Utena: What's so funny?
Amane: You are treating me as a child after all. Because I’m a child, you believe that I must have been brainwashed. It’s not like that. I, too— children, too, understand everything! Please don’t just decide that people must be unhappy.
What she wants doesn't matter! When has it ever mattered? The people who say it does, don't like it when she acts in a manner they don't expect and her parents have made it Very Clear that what she does isn't important to them.
Any sort of happiness she could possibly get tends to come from things that are outside of her cult. And because of that, she isn't supposed to have them, and she is wrong for wanting them in the first place.
And yet...Amane cares so much about having free will and autonomy though, it's her main argument in her T1 VD and her biggest problem with her treatment.
Amane: I see. Then, are the things that I as a twelve-year-old think irrelevant? Are you going to cast aside the feelings that I know I have in this very moment, purely based on the fact that I have not yet lived for a very long time? Judging these things based on someone’s age will not take you very far. Do I, at age twelve, not have my own will?
That's the thing with Amane Momose, she doesn't want to be a "princess."
T2Q13: If you could be reborn, would you still choose to be yourself? A: Obviously.
She wants to stay as her, no matter what. In spite of all of this she doesn't want to be anything else But Her. Even if it gets her hurt.
Amane helped the cat because she wanted to, she saw it hurt and couldn't look away.
Utena: Hey, save her! Utena: It's too cruel! Utena: Save her! Utena: Save her...
And in the eyes of god, she was wrong for doing so.
Dios: She can no longer be saved.
’Tis ordained, thou shall follow thine destiny
But again, Amane doesn't want to die.
T1Q12: What is the meaning of life? A: I think it is something you learn for the first time when you look behind yourself when it ends. I do not want to have regrets then, so I live on with all my might.
This was the tipping point of her, how much more is she willing to suffer? How much longer is she willing to stay here? Because she will die, it's not an if, its a when.
So, she decides, to break out of her coffin, and while it is partially due to how she was given a righteous reason to kill her mother. It is a crime that is mainly motivated by self-preservation and hatred.
Amane: Furthermore, isn’t it condescending of you to assume that just because I happen to be a child, I am incapable of hating someone enough to kill them?
Unfortunately for her, the audience isn't as willing to accept that.
I talk about it in more detail over here but we are Constantly positioned in the place of her abusers. From framing to her opinions on us, ever since we voted her guilty in T1 for the primary reason of "making her realize her mistakes." we mimic her parents.
Since she cannot become a princess, she becomes a witch, and is forced right back into that cycle she desperately tried to escape.
And Someday, Together, We'll Shine
So, that's a bit of a downer. But even so we have hope!
It's not exactly easy when the system built is so counter-productive to everyone's wellbeing and development that it often makes them worse instead of better.
But Amane has made a promise to live. Muu Does want to have genuine relationships with the people around her. And Mahiru has admitted her relationship wasn't as ideal as she initially thought.
And sometimes, you just need to see a possibility for something outside of all this to be able to get out of it.
Anthy: What will you be doing in ten years? Utena: I dunno. But... Anthy: But? Utena: But I hope we can be together like this drinking tea then. Anthy: Yes. I hope so too. Utena: I'm sure that'll be great. Utena: Let's have tea and laugh together ten years from now, okay? Utena: Promise? Anthy: Yes. Definitely.
#milgram#amane momose#mahiru shiina#muu kusonoki#008#006#004#milgram meta#milgram analysis#ITS DONE#HOLY SHIT ITS FUCKING DONE#I NEED TO WRITE THE PRINCE POST TOO BUT LETS IGNORE THAT FOR A SECOND#if theres any grammatical mistakes/weird sentences/so on please inform me!#theres probably one hiding somewhere...#not sure if I tag utena or not...#cw child abuse#cw cults#cw sexism#cw sa mention#holy shit im so sorry for forgetting those
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the poor little meow meow-ifictation of saionji in this fandom has got to stop i can't take it any more
#he is an interesting character yes and i like him but some of you act like he is eternally and exclusively a victim which is not true#yes he is a victim of akio and of the narrative (like every other character. he is not perticularly special in this regard)#no he is not a victim of the patriarchy (he in fact benefits from it directly at the cost of the girls around him)#no he is not a victim of wakaba (??not sure where this even came from) no he is not a victim of anthy (watch the first episode again maybe)#some of you are at all times 2 steps away from becoming the next misandry in the utena fandom person#“erm the way he is punished by the narrative for failing to live up to the masculine ideal of the prince-#-is basically just as bad as the systemic abuse he participates in putting girls through“#good lord i do not want to hear your takes on any real world feminist issues#m#bad takes#(should probably remember to use that tag. even though this isn't really about anything super specific)#and it's not about any of my mutuals to be clear. you all know how to actually be critical of how much he sucks#AND write good nuanced analysis. shockingly you can do both. actually i don't think one is possible without the other
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The Frog Prince and her Bride (inspiration: x)
#revolutionary girl utena#shoujo kakumei utena#utenanthy#wasnt sure whether to use hehim on utena or not#bc one time i saw a post explaining that utena was kiiiiiiinda likely to be a hehim sorta girl. but also her bride as a phrase is cooler#and iirc utena was sheher in dub so its not like INcorrect but after the post im like hm but the supporting evidence for hehim being a#better translation IS there#the post im describing in the tags isnt the post i linked#sorry to the person getting linked to randomly but . well.#yeagh
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I cannot believe I have to write a post about this in regards to my Utena art, but an account on here called @/familyromantic just reblogged fanart I made of Miki and Kozue as ship art, and they are specifically a blog dedicated to incestuous ships and proshipping.
Of ALL of the art you could reblog of this topic, you choose to reblog non-ship art I made of two CHILDREN who have a deeply troubled and traumatizing relationship with incest in the context of their story, and tag my art as a ship on your blog.
Just to say this explicitly - any proshippers/incest shippers/sexual assault romanticizers/whatever: DO NOT REBLOG MY ART. Especially do not reblog my Utena art. I have already blocked this account so hopefully they won't be able to reblog any more of my Utena pieces, but I felt the need to make this post to establish firmly how I feel about this subject matter. Utena is a very triggering show that includes these topics, and that is unavoidable - what I won't tolerate is anyone who romanticizes and sexualizes these topics to engage with my fanart of the series.
#revolutionary girl utena#rgu#this is not a call out post#im sure theyve already had their fair share of people who are deeply disturbed or triggered by their blog#i do not care to engage with them i only want to block#just as a rule of thumb: please dont tag any art i make that i don't already tag as ship art AS ship art#obv this is a different scenario then say me just drawing a couple of friends i dont personally ship but#idk seeing that reblog notification was just like what the fuck to me#text post
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made this specifically for the 90s 2000s kids. don’t ask me why i grouped them like this i simply was going on vibes
#anime#poll#FUCK i made it last only one day. forgot. answer quick i guess 😭😭#AND I CLICKED THE WRONG ANSWER TOO#tumblr poll#manga#sailor moon#revolutionary girl utena#inuyasha#cowboy bebop#fullmetal alchemist#demon slayer#black butler#death note#soul eater#hetalia#ouran high school host club#naruto#dragon ball#hunter x hunter#yugioh#bleach#attack on titan#tokyo ghoul#idk if i tagged them all i tried#maybe i will remake this later bc i failed hard#anyway i was on tumblr in 2013 and these were the only things anyone talked about ever. before you question some of my additions here#cowboy bebop and bakugan are honorary mentions i feel like most people don’t Start with bebop but then again idk. it’s such a classic#i wanted to know#and bakugan everyone in elementary school had the toys for but i’m not sure how many actually watched the anime
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thinking about nanami’s genuine and hopeful and relieved little smiles she makes after akio tells her to consider herself family in the tower, and once she realises it’s Just Him on the couch in the planetarium at night. punching the wall. unrelated haha. totally. i am normal. i dont have any kind of emotions about the trust placed in that fucking man by such vulnerable children, certainly not how he exploits and abuses that trust. god there really are a lot of holes in my wall now
#another of my top ten punchable akio moments: the way utena says ‘get in the picture too akio’ in 34#bc she says it with such WARMTH. like!!!!!!!!!!!! oh my gof!!!!!!!!!!!#girls when you cannot reject the man you owe your life to. girls when you love him#like that is PRECISELY what makes akio so fucking unbearable and awful to me. how much he is loved and trusted#rgu#shut up daisy#not sure if i should tag anything here so??#ask to tag
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2023 go bye bye
#999 spoilers#art summary#art summery 2023#my art#shoutout to all my monster high drawings that are still in the oven#I haven't posted them anywhere but! my friends made them pins and I've sold them on cons throughout the year :3#I only started drawing them as a request from a boothmate actually and they're such fun designs to draw!!!#I went to a lot of local conventions to participate in the artist's alley and made so many friends that way it was wonderful#I think the next thing I'll reblog will be the game I worked on!#found out the nda doesn't cover me simply saying 'hey I worked on this thing coming out in a few months!'#so I made artist and cosplayer friends selling my art on the beach and I got my first proper job#....then I proceeded to give me a shoulder inflammation because my setup was terrible and it had to catch up to me eventually#but! already managed to get a new tablet and desk for myself!! it's even a screen tablet so there'll be a learning curve but I'm excited#I'm hoping this display will make things easier I always had trouble sketching on digital#and I am more carefully taking breaks now also because turns out relying on hiperfocus is bad for you? never knew#I was going through some stuff in the middle of the year there though I had so many vent drawings of akane from may to october qwq#not featured here are the tons of utena and umineko wips I have accumulated those were my favorite new media I got to experience for sure#in fact I'm watching the adolescence movie rn!! what in tarnation is this last act lol whatever! go Anthy go!!! floor it queen#also not featured the tons of oc stuff I made :D I'm glad I feel like I can start properly working on them soon ^^#but yeah that's that I felt like writing a whole diary entry in these tags and you read it and that's what tumblrs all about ♡♥︎
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Vierapril - 6 - victory
Dominants of Tungli ordinarily embody one of Her aspects more than the other; and with the Garleans on the Rava's doorstep, it's no surprise that the latest of her Dominants, Onti, favors the Red Moon more than the White. As such she is more than capable of defending herself in most situations; but that doesn't mean her sworn protector, Bylka, is going to take her job any less seriously.
#final fantasy xiv#ffxiv#vierapril#vierapril 2024#ffxiv viera#ffxiv black mage#ffxiv dragoon#bylti blomstrandi#(sort of)#not sure if I should tag this 'utena' or not bc it certainly is#on our fates alight aka the ffxvi au#onti kistuna#bylka kistuna
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rgu vision thoughts
Utena anemo/Anthy cryo/Akio electro as discussed
Saionji, electro — not only his theme being eternity, but he's kinda the odd one out of the student council. He may be more inverse electro actually, where he has no hidden power or identity and constantly chasing after Touga and doesn't understand anything, until he loops around so hard he's electro again. This makes sense to me
Touga — genuinely no idea. I tried so hard. I can't fit him in anything. He's just an asshole. Maybe he gets geo for Persistently Asshole. Is there an element for calling yourself a feminist when you're a playboy that emotionally manipulates two lesbians apart
Miki - Hydro. Sure he doesn't really have a sense of right/wrong or justice but he's got that weird thing with purity going on and a duality in how he sees his sister and Anthy he's trying to reconcile that's arguably a twisted version of right/wrong
Juri - Pyro. She's the only one there with a visibly strong drive, even if the drive is 'I will prove miracles don't exist'. She models she games she fences she's so talented to suppress how gay she is. Maybe this makes her anemo instead
Nanami - Cryo. Anthy's foil. Plus her theme is adoration. But also she's got that duality thing going on, she's from a family with a name she's adopted she's Touga's beloved sister he treats her like a toy she's the top of the pecking order of her girl posse she may be a literal animal????
Shoutout to Wakaba "Special people may as well live in a different world" for being visionless surrounded by people with a vision until she breaks down in an elevator and is given a delusion which she'll immediately use for murder. That she rightfully deserves.
#wait this is funny actually bc i for half of the student council i'm half arguing why they're not their element#but look. look. they're all such Problematic:tm: people that. what else do I argue#.................i may come back to this in three months and completely change my mind. or i may forget altogether. who knows#shoutout to windcarvedlyre for our shared utena interest and feel free to correct my unserious thoughts#sorry to everyone else who follows me who doesn't watch rev girl utena and has no idea what i'm talking about#(look up a trigger list and watch rev girl utena it is. so good. life changing i may say)#shiori can get a cryo delusion to contrast juri's pyro vision#............what do i even tag this as#genshin talk#sure#i think i'm done for real now It is Soon
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the best (worst) part about rewatching rgu is that you catch more fucked up implications every time that leave you reeling for a full week
for example this time I noticed that in all of Nanami's good childhood memories and photos of Touga, his hair is still short, while by the time of finding Utena's coffin it grew out to be almost as long as it is throughout the show
#the first time i watched rgu i wasn't sure if nanamis kitten memory or saionjis coffin memory came earlier in the timeline#cause like. it's really hard to tell watch ages rgu characters are meant to be just based on appearance#but after watching adolescence... oh that paints a really clear timeline that i wish i hadn't pieced together!#feel like i should probably tag this#csa mention#just in case#revolutionary girl utena
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I completed the main story for Scarlet and Violet! While I procastinate doing the post game, take every single Pokemon who’s been a main part of my party during the game . But as People! For fun -- you’ll need to click on the full first image for all the details I’m sorry I’ll . Maybe get around to reblogging this with a cropped version of th first one
#Oh crap art#art#artists on tumblr#... is this fanart or OCs#Yes?#fanart#OC#Pokemon gijinkas#PkMn gijinka#Not tagging all these Pokemon#Uhh spitball thoughts time#Last three in my first image are in a band together that prob sounds like shit#Utena will try to learn p much any type of sword she has access to . The one she's wielding is a butterfly sword .#Which is a Chinese sword and not a Japanese one I should specify I know that but hey if shes got access tyo it she'll wield it#Rosie turned out way different than I'd draw any normal Tinkaton-#-but if I left her and other four PkMn out with a Ditto she'd always be the one who made the most eggs#So#Mom decided#Ummm despite me tryna research properly I'm not sure I got Chimon's clothes right at all if I fucked smth up ever yell at me#OH#S.T. is a vampire bc I was tryna find some way to do primal aggressive w/e without the connotations#and someone somewhere compared scream tails to energy vampires so
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these lines hit different when you read utena as transmasc
#i mean the first one is really awful regardless.#pretty sure i read somewhere that the words akio uses means something along the lines of 'you really should remain a child'#as opposed to 'you really should remain the gender that you are.' which speaks to his whole thing about keeping these kids from growing up#and there's So Much in anthy's line even without hypothetical misgendering#anyway the au where utena has already transitioned by the time he gets to ohtori is really good#and i of course have lots of headcanons about post-ohtori utena and gender#but i've been thinking about one where he's actively questioning while he's there and is not out to anyone.#and i guess not a lot would really change but akio's attempt at making utena more feminine would have a whole other layer of awful to it#and unfortunately i think in this scenario the first person he would come out to would be akio. which is so sad#like maybe it could be anthy but idk. i think it would be something he'd be apprehensive to be open about with her#(in the show utena does tend to be more vulnerable with akio than with anthy. at least the vulnerability with him comes first.#he's her go-to person for advice in the black rose arc and utena doesn't really begin opening up to anthy like that until the third arc)#maybe i should write something for this au. i can see it so clearly.#utena talking about his confusing gender feelings in one of those black rose scenes in the planetarium#and akio doing that thing where he sounds supportive and helpful but absolutely isn't.#that fake sympathy that's actually really patronizing and condescending and dismissive but subtly enough that utena doesn't realize it#and THEN the contrast when utena finally talks to anthy about it and she empathises by talking about her own confusing gender feelings#(transfem anthy realness !!!!!)#oh wow i did not mean to write so much in the tags#revolutionary girl utena#utena tenjou#my posts
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3 episodes into RGU and the way Anthy says "Miss Utena" already has my brain in a chokehold
#i want to know everything about them!!!!!#i just watch things so slowly rip#revolutionary girl utena#eve watches utena#sure let's make this a tag why not
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tagged by @kieter for a post meme which I gather is meant to allow people to get to know you a little better, which is very nice
last song: good question answer very unclear at the moment. pick like any song that's been regarded as a mainstream queer pop anthem in the last 15 years and I've probably heard it today. I remember specifically hearing born this way at one point? but what I have stuck in my head is The Wolf by The Crane Wives
currently watching: several various things at absolutely fucking glacial pace - x men evolution, revolutionary girl utena, soul eater, lycoris recoil, and the entire video history of a youtube channel which reviews fountain pens
currently reading: lancer ttrpg handbook, chainsaw man, homestuck (unknown number of attempted rereads), and sort of/hopefully a couple other books that I set down some months ago and haven't gotten back to
current obsession: my. homestuck oc werewolf au that's actually a vampires and werewolves bloodswap au developed in partnership with @andromedasea / @radiandromeda (and I also have an ask blog for the non au versions of my characters at @popcornhorns). AND. friends at the table the actual play podcast. AND @/kieter's unpublished webcomic variance, for which a considerable amount of information can be found at @askvariance. Thank You For Your Time.
tagging (optionally!!): @scromch @shrimpblast @circuitousmoths @solpuff @eikkirune @bigegg09 @bigfootswashingmachine @oriigami @peachshion if you'd like, if not no worries
#do I even have an original posts tag anymore#jay jr#rad#utena#homestuck#friends at the table#variance#sure
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Nah I can never fucking read berserk I saw a few PANELS of the rape scenes and it’s way too fucking much for me, I actually felt ill, fuck that shitt
#‘but utena!’ utena is way fucking different and you know it#its doesnt show 20 panels of anthy getting assaulted in graphic detail#look im sure berserk has a great story and is amazing or whatever but i am not triggering myself to get through it hell no#rei says stuff#tw: sa mention#tw sa mention#cw sa mention#cw: sa mention#ask to tag
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i love her so much.
#crow's scribbles#d4dj#d4dj groovy mix#aoi miyake#hiiro yano#uh. sure i'll tag tuba and nagis#tsubaki aoyagi#nagisa tsukimiyama#yes i drew aoi as dr. doofenshmirtz. they have the same fashion tastes.#all of these are in the same place as my aoi utena drawing btw#dr. aoi is RIGHT beside utena aoi#so u have aoi going aheem heem and then her looking fabulous
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