#not only am i allergic but i also do not like cats

[niallandtommo]

.

[figuerockfaeth]

I NEED TO MOVE OUT NOOWWWWWWW

[backpackingspace]

we are straight up not having a good time rn

[gallusrostromegalus]

hi i see that you have much smart dog experience. i may have accidentally purchased such a dog. she's only 10 weeks, and ive had her 1, and she's already outmatched every puzzle feeder i got or have made. to the point that she is morosely disappointed when her food comes in an actual food bowl. do you know where i can find like. "heres 100 enrichment toys you can make out of free trash so your dog stops eating fucking rocks for enrichment" lists. i only have so many paper towel tubes XD

Herschel now just disassembles puzzle feeders, so I've been focusing on "Toys that, even if he already knows how to operate them, will still take TIME for him to collect the treat from" to give him something to fuss with.

Herschel eats all his meals out of a Kong Wobbler, because he will otherwise eat so fast he will literally inhale and choke on his kibble and I do not need him developing pneumonia from aspiration. Even though it's a "Simple" toy it slows him down and he does have to think a bit to tip it in the most efficient manner possible. Kong's "Flipz", "Gyro" and "Rewards Wally" are also really good "dog needs to think/carefully manipulate the toy for food" toys that act as both mental stimulation and exercise and "give human a break for up to twelve minutes" toys.

I highly reccomend KONG as a brand- they're local to Denver and have an impeccable saftey record and all of the toys I have gotten from them have held up extremely well vs. the ravages of three entirely too smart and strong-jawed dogs at once.

Some more thoughts:

If she's not prone to shredding rubber, the kind of treat toys she has to chew are also good stimulation.

If you don't want to give her That Many treats, my vet said that dogs can have as many green beans as they want. Just make sure that the beans haven't had salt added to them- canned usually does, but frozen green beans usually don't, but always check the label.

You can make nearly any toy last longer, or make a cheap long-puzzle by freezing the treats so they take longer to eat AND provides hydration. Herschel's most favorite treat of all time is literally a wad of sliced green beans in a dixie cup, filled with water and frozen. Just peel off the cup and hand him the chunk of ice and he's good for up to half an hour and more chill afterwards.

You can also freeze lick mats

If your girl is like Charlie and doesn't like greenbeans, you can also try freezing paper cups of: Canned pumpkin, apple slices in water, putting some ice cubes in the bottom of the cup, a gob of peanut butter in the middle and then fill it with water to make a peanutbutter filled ice cube.

If your girl is REALLY like charlie who has figured out how to use labor negotiation and strike tactics for better treats: boiled chicken chunks frozen in some of the water you boiled them in.

Walkies are as much mental stimulation as they are physical exercise. Take her out and let her sniff to her heart's content.

Also Puppies in particular need like, SO MUCH exercise.

Let her participate in activities with you. Herschel and charlie sit in the kitchen and I narrate cooking dinner to them, which seems to interest them, even if I don't have spare veggie ends to give them. I also frequently bring them along in the car if I'm running errands when it's cold enough to do that, so they have something new to look at, and get to participate. I also am more likely to stop at a new park and give myself some exercise and mental stimulation.

Training her to do tasks is GREAT Smart Dog enrichment- esp if she's a herding or heeler, they LOVE being helpful. I taught the dogs they get a small treat if they come in from the yard without me having to go chase them down, which saved me a lot of hassle, and now I'm working on teaching herschel to pick things up off the floor for me if I drop them and alert for chickpeas, which my housemate is allergic to.

A lot of dogs like cat-type toys. Tie a stick or some fleece to some paracord and drag or flycast it around for her to chase/play tug with when she catches it. Toys that bounce unexpectedly were also a huge hit. or just wave the string around the cat and the corgi both like that.

If you live in farm country or know other people with pets, you can grab something with the scent of another animal on it and bring it home for her to smell. Charlie and Herschel spent the better part of three days investigating the wad of horse undercoat I brought home and put in the spare wobbler for them to smell.

[sweet1delusi0ns]

Naruto boys random headcanons──☆*:・ﾟ

Sfw

Characters: Naruto🦊,sasuke🗡️,Itachi🥀, kakashi🍃, kiba🐺, shikamaru🀄️,shino🪲,neji🎋,Lee🥋,choji🍥,gaara⏳,kankuro🪆

Naruto🦊-*

Hes lazy at home. Not because he’s tired he just wants you to take care of him, but when you call him a baby for all these requests he gets mad “I AM NOT A BABY! I AM A GROWN MAN! NOW SPOON FEED ME!”

He tries to prank you but fails, your too smart to fall for it. He always tries to trip you in public while walking and every time he is the one on the floor and your the one laughing some how-

He likes the idea of drawing and being an artist he just can’t draw. He can only draw stick people with different hair, one time he tried to draw you, gave up and instead gave you a picture of a stick person with your hair. It’s now on the fridge LOL

He tries to act cool around his friend with you but just makes a fool of himself. “Yeah this my bae so what?” “Yeah I’m his bae and he’s my baby, my big, soft, smiley baby!” His soul is now crushed and his friends all laughing

He sleeps like a ANIMAL. he full on can’t sleep normally, You both go to bed the same time, one of you is always gunna wake up on the floor, mostly you. Then he wakes up like “why you on the floor?”

Sasuke🗡️-*

He may seem cool but he gets very flustered. He doesn’t cover his face though he just closes his eyes so he doesn’t get more flustered and so he can ignore the fact that he is red

He CANT Dance, don’t EVER take him dancing. It’s not because he’s bad at dancing he just never learn. If there is music he will bop his head to the beat though, if you try to get him to dance he will freak out and freeze. He just doesn’t like it ok!

His waist is weirdly sensitive, you could barely touch his waist and he will start giggling. He isn’t ticklish anywhere else but if you take a feather to his waist he will start LAUGHING

He will kick your feet when he wants attention. If you guys are out to dinner with friends he will kick you under the table to get your attention, he thinks it’s funny until you fight back and stomp on his foot. He made you kiss his pain away at home, atleast he got attention LOL

He forgets the silliest things one time he forgot how to tie a knot so anything he needs to tie like his clothes or shoes you had to do for him. You don’t know if he actually forgot or if he just wanted to be babied-

Itachi🥀-*

He can’t handle heatwaves. If it’s over 90 degrees he’s gone for. One time you woke up on a heat wave morning waiting for him to wake up and walk out but he never did, you went to find him and he was in bed, sprawled out, shirt and covers off soaked in sweat. You had to rub ice on him to get him conscious -

Unlike naruto, he likes drawing and can ACTUALLY DRAW, although he can only draw plants but he doesn’t mind he likes plants! He will draw you flowers instead of buying you some which is like equally as cute~

He has very sensitive eyes. Like how he can’t handle heat he cant handle the sun either. If it isn’t cloudy he will have to squint to keep his eyes from hurting. When you told him to wear sun glasses he said “I still want to see you clearly though love…”

He’s not a big fan of skin care but he likes those face roller things. He bought one just so you could use it on him, he likes that it’s cold but also massaging!

He sneezes like a girl- he has the cutest, most petite sneeze you’ve ever heard out of a man which is cute and very funny. He doesn’t even realize it either “a-choo!” “That was crazy out of character” “huh?”

Kakashi🍃-*

He’s allergic to cats, he likes cats sure but he never hangs around them because he’s allergic. You didn’t know that and one day you brought a stray inside and he instantly turned puffy (poor thing)

Once he gets home and discards the mask he puts lip tint on. He has pink lips for that reason. When he first puts it on he will find you and kiss you just to leave a mark before waiting 10 minutes then whipping it off

He needs reading glasses but never uses them, then complains to you when he gets a headache as if you didn’t tell him to put them on

He takes a lot of baths. If he showers it bound to end up a bath. And he doesn’t care if your using the bathroom if he wants a bath he’s gunna make a god Danm bath. One time You were just washing your face and he busted in the door and ran to the bathtub, You washed your face as fast as you could-

He is EXTREMELY tired when he first wakes up, he doesn’t move for like 20 minutes so if he needs to get up and do stuff your gunna have to make him, like actually you’ll have the carry him out of bed.

Kiba🐺-*

He bites his nails from stress so you have made it a habit to smack his hand away when he does. It worked since all you have to do is tap him softly and he will stop. He’s so glad you help him get over bad habits

He decorated akamarus ears when he’s bored, one time you walk in on him giggling like a little girl and akamarus ears were pulled together in a little ponytail! You joined in on the fun🤞

He comes back from a casual walk along a complete mess, you have no idea how but one day he came back with half a bush stuck on his leg. He always cleans up though!

He sometimes transforms akamaru into himself to prank his friends or you, mostly you. One time akamaru came up to you as Kiba and started licking your face “EW OH MY GOD?!” “AUUFF AUF!” “KIBA YOUR NOT FUNNY”

He always has tan cheeks and nose. Compared to the rest of his face, his cheeks are cute and golden!

Shikamaru🀄️-*

He lets you win at intelligents based games to make you feel better. Except one time he actually tried and lost. He’s convinced you cheated

His hair is straight but gets very frizzy if not cared for. (You care for it since he’s lazyy)

He draws on himself when bored, mostly just trippy designs like swirls and stuff. Will also let you draw on him, only if your good tho he doesn’t want “bad drawing” on him😔

He has a box FULL of hair ties and will notice if you take one. “This one you literally stole from me?” “Don’t care put it back!!!”

He gets Freezingly cold at night, like really really cold. When he snuggles up to you to warm up you could feel how cold he really is and you don’t understand how since you are both under covers-

Shino🪲-*

He keeps bugs in the house so they can watch over anything, they are basically his security cameras-

His hair is so cute and wavy! Also gets very frizzy because of the texture like Shika. He also makes you take care of it, he just really likes you touching his hair

He gives you bugs as gifts, not like freaky beetles but cute little bugs like lady bugs or fuzzy green caterpillars. You find it cute that he gives you things that mean so much to him

He shockingly has a sensitive neck, only to you though. Bugs can crawl all over it and he doesn’t move but if you try to kiss it he gets chills. Also shockingly he has really soft skin idk maybe he sheds skin (IM JOKING)

When he gets home and can finally undress he lets you take his glasses off since you love his eyes and he loves that you love them. He gets insecure about it sometimes!

Neji🎋-*

He speak really highly and intelligently but he’s honestly a little dumb sometimes, or maybe he’s just dumb with you to be silly we don’t know

The only jewelry he really wears is an ankle bracelet you got him

He loves hair charms, he likes decorating his hair! He likes putting clips and braids in it, sometimes even put color streaks in it if he wants to be festive

He really likes pottery and making things out of clay, he’s very creative and he finds clay the perfect outlet. He even makes pots for you!

He has a flower garden that NO ONE is allowed in. He treats them like they’re his baby’s, because they are! He’s favorite plant he has is his cactuses.

Lee🥋-*

He’s extremely energetic and powerful yet he has asthma, he denies it. But if it’s really hot outside he runs out of breath REALLY fast which makes you worry

He’s scared of spiders you kill the spiders for him or he runs! If you trap a spider and chase him with it he will almost start crying (he will start crying) he’s ashamed to admit spiders are his weakness

He wears mascara, he gotta make them lashes voluminous yk. He stole his mascara from tenten too. You made him give it back to her and bought him his own

It’s pretty obvious but he is FLEXIBLE! Backbend, splits anything he can do. You thought he broke his spine onces-

He’s not much of a plant guy but he has the TINIEST succulent in your room that he cares for, every other plant he has had died but not that one~

Choji🍥-*

He loves finger painting and is actually really good at it, you’d think it was made by a professional and an actual paint brush but no it was Choji and his finger paint😭

His hair is so thick most hair ties he uses break. He has to use hair needles instead because it’s the only thing that holds if he wants his hair up for a while

He thinks pillow fights are actually entertaining he could have a pillow fight with you all day and never get bored. He goes crazy if he’s over at someone’s house and they suggest pillow fights!

He loves bath bombs!!! He basically died when you run him a bath and put bath bombs in it, his favorite scent it lavender. Even if you didn’t add a bath bomb he loves when you make him baths he thinks its adorable

He paints your cheeks like his in your sleep, that’s his idea of a prank even though it’s basically him just being a cutie “look now your like me y/n!!”

Gaara⏳-*

He turns the black rings around his eyes to cat eyes sometimes. He looks ADORABLE with cat eyes. He sometimes even uses eye shadow too, if he can’t change it he thought might as well make it look cutee

He’s scared of mosquitos, he just doesn’t like bugs that can fly and go after human blood it freaks him out

He wears one of those scent bracelets and puts your signature scent in it so he always smells like you~

He gifts you plants all the time

He collect the silliest things, there are these cute little cat charms at a near by store and he’s working on collecting them all!

Kankuro🪆-*

Shockingly he really likes reading. He likes fiction books the most, he asks you for suggestions

He asks you what new make up design he should try, sometimes he just gives you the brush and lets you go wild. But you always make him look cute~

He fidgets with the ears on his hat when he’s bored. It rubbed off on you so now if he’s around you with his hat on you start messing with them-

He steals your clothes and hides them so you have no choice but to ask to use his for the day. After the day is over he comes up to you smiling and hands you your missing clothes “found em!” “By found em do you mean took them out of the hiding spot?” “Yeah-”

He paints his nails either black, pink or purple. He also lets you paint them, it honestly just ends up a mess. He would totally whip nail polishes on your nose~

[etheries1015]

I had sort of a crack idea of what would the non-human twst boys do if their crush or s/o was allergic to them? Savanaclaw and Octonivelle with like the fur allergy and seafood allergy. Maybe diasomnia’s s/o has some sort of fairy allergy? Sorry if this is too silly for you to write, it’s alright if you don’t 😭

I LOVE THIS BECAUSE I'VE HAD A SIMILAR THOUGHT i'm allergic to cats and i'm like...man what am I gonna do around Grim BUAHAHA...this is a great idea. Nothing is too silly to write my friend!

Non-human Twst boys reacting to a S/O who is allergic to them!

featuring: Savanaclaw and Octavinelle!

general warnings: gender neutral reader, not really proof read \

TW: None! just fluff. and allergies.

Leona

The first time you sneezed around him, they didn't know it was literally BECAUSE of him. This was until you two took a nap together for the first time, and when you woke up he saw your face...Oh, brother. Your eyes were puffy and red, congested, and your nose leaked like nobody's business. He genuinely felt bad about this, but wouldn't let you in on his true feelings/emotions. Without understanding the cause (though he had an inkling) he immediately took you to the doctor.

"They're allergic to me? What kind of shitty nonsense is that?!"

Leona invested in the most expensive of healthcare for you. Allergy pills and whatnot, because he wasn't about to sacrifice his lovely naps with his significant other. No amount of allergy is gonna stop him from getting what he wants, and that is your affection.

Ruggie

"Sooo...basically you're saying you're allergic to me? Cause' im part heyena?"

"It's a little more complicated than that. It's more like...animal dander? I guess?" You didn't seem to certain in your answer either, it was more or less a guess since...well, there wasn't half beast half human where you are from. You can only make an educated guess on why you're so allergic to him based off of the information you had back at home.

Ruggie is honestly so sad about this. He can't afford to get you any treatments or medical help with this, so you two just have to be careful. He does manage to get his hands on some special washing products (probably legally) and takes extra care of what he eats, and how clean he his. He's consistently brushing his hair and cleaning his ears.

"Man i'm such a simp. What's wrong with me?!" ...He isn't used to bending backward for people. But seeing you so sick around him, hurt him even more than his pride, so he of course would do anything to make sure you're as comfortable around him as possible. Ahh...the power of love <3

Jack

He gives me the "I must stay away from you for your own good," Type. Although this doesn't last very long. Jack is incredibly loyal, and he's far too attached to let you go. There's times where he would try and keep a distance (much to your annoyance), but when you began sneezing and itching your eyes you knew he was somewhere nearby. Jack is protective like that, but it pains his heart to see you so sick because of something he cannot control.

He does both a mix of what Ruggie and Leona does. He took up extra part-time jobs to afford good allergy medication for you, the entire works. Pills, eye drops, nasal sprays, breathing treatments...He also invests in high-quality shampoo and conditioner to help rid of his dander and hopefully reduce the amount of shedding he has.

With the amount of hair Jack has, he is CONSTANTLY brushing it and it is CONSTANTLY shedding. He does EVERYTHING under the sun to control this, all for you. Although... this is a partnership! You told him that a relationship goes two ways. You love him regardless of how itchy you may get, and you equally chip in to problem-solve.

You're both loyal to each other until the very end, no matter what trivial matters may get in your way <3

Azul

He knew before you two started dating that you had a severe allergy to seafood, so he made it a point to avoid you. But...that didn't stop YOU from coming to HIM. It was one of the things that drew him towards you, the way even though you were gaining a rash you would still wrap your arms around the back of him. Although it wasn't as bad in his human form, he was always terrified what would happen if he were to unleash his original form.

But worry not! We are talking about the literal king of potionology. He finds a remedy very quickly, and you trust him...a little too fast. He is astonished when he says;

"Take this...the second you drink this your allergies will be something of the past. But be warned-" You grabbed it out of his hand and chugged it. He stared at you with his jaw slacked open, his face turning a deep shade of hot red when you throw yourself onto Azul and place a big fat kiss against his cheek.

He imploded. But hey! his potion worked! He tried to get you to give him some sort of paypack, but you mentioned that your form of payment was in that kiss.

He now demands kisses every time he makes the potion for you <3 It's kind of a silent agreement. He just stares at you after you're done drinking it, and whenever you feign ignorance the point upon his lips is far too obvious.

Jade

The first time you broke out in hives, he remained completely calm. Jade is rather smart, and he understands your allergy must be because of his disposition as a mer-folk. Although in human form, he couldn't help but notice the way you would hide your rashes either behind makeup or by bulking clothing. He was amused by this for a moment, but when he saw it worsen he couldn't help but become worried.

"Why would you go so far for me? what do you gain by allowing yourself to become sick?" When you replied with a blush that you simply liked Jade, thus his shock soon turned into action. He excused himself for a few days to climb mountains and collect the most effective of flowers and medicinal remedies for allergies and put together a potion that you were able to take to alleviate your symptoms.

He isn't the vice house warden for nothing! His talents and magic prowess truly aided him, albeit in a way that was seemingly selfish. It was all worth it for you, though.

But he does use you as an example during a class project in potionology, having you stand up in front of the class while he compares your allergies before and after taking the potion.

He got a 100% in the project. And a Significant other. A win-win for everyone!

Floyd

Floyd is much smarter than he lets on. The moment he hugs you from behind and touches your arm, he notices the rash right away. He eyed it with a frown, and without saying anything he let go of you much to your dismay, leaving you to your lonesome for a few days on end.

You had to admit you missed Floyd, his silly jokes and way of talking, his unpredictable personality, and the attention he would often give y you. While sitting at the table during a free period, your head was propped up against your hand and a sad sigh escaping your lips.

"Ehhhh? Why is shrimpy sitting here all alone? Didya miss me?" A familiar voice teased as arms wrapped around you and something akin to a vegetable drink set in front of you. You gasped and smile up at the tall male, who wasn't wrapping his arms around you as you were used to, typically ignoring the itching of your rashes. He convinced you to drink what he sat in front of you, and although you eyed it with suspicion, you sighed and drank it in one gulp and tightly shut eyes.

Nothing happened. You turned to look over at Floyd, about to question the purpose of making you drink the (surprisingly tasty) smoothie-like liquid but were quickly interrupted by lips pressing against your own.

The kiss caught you off guard and you began to panic, talking about your allergy...before you realized that nothing was happening. No rash, no itchiness, nothing.

"Seeeee? It's a potion. I made Azul make it for me. Now I can touch you as much as I want," He smiled proudly. However he managed to convince Azul would forever be beyond you...

He forgets to give you the potion sometimes, only when you two are cuddling and a rash or itching pops up do the both of you realize it's time for a dose.

Ya'll are so silly for each other <3

[cherryrikis]

SWEET LATTE

PAIRING non idols yang jungwon x fem reader

WARNINGS none

GENRE fluff

SYNOPSIS you and jungwon decide to get a cat. and he loves it more than he’d admit.

despite the two of you being incredibly allergic, you somehow managed to convince jungwon to let you get a cat, since maeum has been with his parents.

so you did. you brought it home. but now you were clueless on what to do, since you both were dog people.

“is it.. dead?” he asked, gently poking the chubby kitten.

“no wonnie, it’s not dead! he’s just sleeping!” you swatted his hand away before scooping up the kitty and holding it in your arms.

as soon as your new pet felt it being lifted off the surface, he immediately woke up, snuggling closer into your grasp. holding the cat out to your boyfriend, he hesitated to pet it, you literally had to bring his hand up for him.

but as soon as jungwon made contact with the cat, “achoo!” he sneezed out loud.

“this was a terrible idea.” he sniffled, wiping his nose with a tissue.

“well you’re gonna have to watch him when i go to the office in.. an hour.” you informed, checking your phone for the time.

“what? you’re working today? i can’t take care of it alone!”

you shrugged in response, before turning back to the kitty in your arms. “you’re so cute!” you cooed. “i’m gonna name you latte!” and immediately, you continuously pecked the top of latte’s head as he purred.

“latte? really? that’s so basic.” jungwon grimaced as he looked at the little beige cat. it was a scottish fold with white spots. “i know it’s basic, but i can’t resist! he’s just the sweetest thing ever.”

“am i no longer your favorite sweet thing?” he joked, playfully pouting as you placed latte in his arms.

“the sweetest,” you gave him a long kiss on the lips before pulling away. “so don’t be like that. i’m gonna go get ready now.” you smiled.

“what am i gonna do with you?” jungwon sighed, staring at latte as he crawled across the couch when they finally sat back down.

by the time you came home, you absolutely were not expecting the sight in front of you. hurrying to take a warm shower, you wrapped your hair in a towel before going to sit next to jungwon in the living room.

you laughed as your boyfriend dangled his keys above latte’s head, the cat reaching out it’s paws tirelessly.

you leaned into jungwon, laying your head on his shoulder as he continued to play with your new child.

“oh jungwon..” you gasped, using your hand to turn his head so he could face you. you examined his red face, his eyes puffy from his allergies.

“it’ll go away later. i took medicine.”

“guess you love him don’t you?” “of course.” he sighed.

“and latte is just so sweet isn’t he?”

“the sweetest.”

“i think he has your eyes.” you point out, comparing the two as you often switched your gaze. “he’s like our little baby.”

“you’re saying i’m a cat?” jungwon raised a brow.

“maybe. i’m also saying our future daughter would look a lot like you.” you shrugged.

“what?” his eyes widened, fully turning to you in shock, “you’d really be willing to start a family with me?”

“of course. i mean, not too soon obviously, we’re only 20. but in the future, i think we’d make really good parents.” you smiled.

jungwon’s heart swelled, and his face ran hot (not just as an allergic reaction).

“my heart is so full right now.” he sighed, taking one hand off the cat to hug your waist as you wrapped your arms around his bicep.

“you’d be a great mother, and a gorgeous wife. also, i totally think we’re gonna have a son.” he whispered.

“daughter.” “son.”

“if we have a son, we should name him-” “i am not naming my son after the cat.” jungwon mumbled.

“whatever.” you grumbled.

“anyway. i can’t believe we got to talk about all this because of a cat. i guess they really are lucky.” he chuckled, leaning further into you as you held him tighter.

“guess that makes you my lucky charm then, doesn’t it?”

“guess so..” jungwon licked his lips, before leaning his head down to kiss you softly.

enjoy this fic? read similar works here!

[prettyflyforawhitelie]

Hazbin Hotel Beach! Headcanons

Characters: Charlie, Vaggie, Alastor, Angel, Husk, Sir Pentious, Nifty, Lucifer, Adam, Cherri

A/N: Hey guys! I am just so ready for summer to come so I can relax on the beach… so i thought it would be fun to do some beach headcanons for our favorite sinners!

😈🗝️Charlie🗝️😈:

Definitely the one that organized this entire beach day.

Though this is supposed to encourage relaxation, she is sort of stressed making sure that everyone gets along. 

Very adamant that everyone wears their sunscreen.

Drags Vaggie into the water to play around and try to find fish.

Makes sure everything is as perfect as it can get. Snacks? Check. Tons of water and drinks? Check. Umbrellas and tents? Check. Speakers? You bet!

Once she tires herself out, she takes a very well-deserved nap in the sand.

🪽⚔️Vaggie⚔️🪽:

Spend the trip making sure that Charlie finally gets a day to relax and not worry so much.

The second anyone tries to splash her or throw sand at her, a full blown beach battle ensues.

Will definitely be the one to dig holes in the sand and see how deep she can make it.

Was planning on relaxing and sunbathing, but gave in to Charlie's begging to go swimming (and actually enjoyed it a lot).

The second Charlie takes a nap, Vaggie will guard her to make sure that nobody disturbs her needed sleep. 

Makes sure to put more sunscreen on Charlie while she’s asleep so she won’t get burned.

🦌📻Alastor📻🦌:

This man is allergic to the sun.

Like, he’s covered from head to toe in sunscreen, wearing far too much clothing given the fact that he’s at the beach, and hides in a beach tent for the entirety of the day. 

Angel thought it would be funny to toss some sand into his tent until Alastor sent one of his shadows after him and he ran away screaming.

Like… Why did he agree to come??

He does enjoy listening to some of the music that Charlie plays until he realizes that it’s coming from a phone and not a radio (Al, who the fuck brings a radio to the beach?).

The only person that he lets come into his tent is Niffty, because she just over exhausts herself and takes a nap in the shade.

🕷️💖Angel Dust💖🕷️:

Definitely the life of the party.

Is wearing the most stylish bikini and the cuntiest sunglasses, just a total beach diva.

Though Charlie insisted that the only drinks allowed were water and soda, Angel manages to sneak a couple bottles of Beelzejuice so he and Husk can actually have some fun.  

Builds sand castles with Cherri Bomb, gets extremely upset if somebody messes it up.

Absolutely demolishes the competition in a game of beach volleyball (Having 6 arms comes in handy). 

Also wins any sort of swimming contest that Vaggie challenges him to (Again, 6 arms really gives you an advantage).

Definitely sees some cute guys and fake-flirts with them to get Husk’s attention.

♥️🥃Husk🥃♥️:

He’s a cat demon for a reason, any time Angel tries to drag him into the water, the hairs on his back rise and he hisses in disdain. 

The group eventually gives up on trying to get him to swim, letting him relax in the sand instead.

Drinks almost all of Angel's alcohol stash and passes out in the sand, curled into a purring ball, wings protecting him from being burned.

Angel takes a picture of him like this, and when he later finds it in Angel’s room he threatens to kill him if he doesn't immediately get rid of it (secretly thinks it's sweet that angel cares enough to hang a photo of him in his room.)

After much begging, he agrees to play beach volleyball with Angel, Cherri, and Vaggie. He absolutely sucks and gets pissed if anybody makes fun of him for it (except for Angel. He’ll allow it).

Ends up carrying most of the heavy stuff after they decide to leave.

🐍⚙️Sir Pentious⚙️🐍:

Decides to bring his Egg Bois, but ends up worried that they’ll literally cook the whole time so he makes a little hole for them in the sand to cool off. 

“Uhh.. Miss Cherri, would you like to build a sandcastle with me?” “Why? I thought we were mortal enemies, old man!” “Uh.. ummm… because I’m asking EVERYONE to build a sandcastle with me…!”

Hangs out in the water the whole time because it’s much easier to maneuver in water than on sand as a snake. 

Built a machine specifically made to drill holes underground, somehow ends up making an entire tunnel system under the sand. This eventually leads to Vaggie walking on a particularly weak spot on the sand and literally falling into the caved-in tunnel. She was pissed off, to say the least, and banned the use of any “inventions” for the rest of the day.

Really wants to impress Cherri and join in on her volleyball game, but is way too shy. He’ll just cheer her on and admire her from the sidelines.

Loves napping in the sun -  being at the beach is like laying under one big heat lamp, so his cold-blooded self delights in it.

🪳🪡Niffty🪡🪳:

Because there are no bugs for her to kill, she will literally hunt hermit crabs for sport. It’s actually horrifying. 

Sir Pentious soon regrets building the whole tunnel system thing because Niffty starts crawling around in it and jumpscaring people at random. 

Somebody has to have their eye on her the entire time, or she will disappear without a trace and just - become one with the crabs?

Eventually tires herself out and takes a nap in Alastor’s tent (Much to everyone’s relief).

Definitely brings up the idea of going out to get a treat after, like ice cream or snow cones, which surprisingly everyone agrees with. 

Ends up sneaking a few small animals back with her to the hotel.

🍒💣Cherri Bomb💣🍒:

Thought it was lame when Charlie insisted on a “sin-free” trip, but had a little hope when Angel told her about the drinks he snuck in. Got extra pissed when she found Husk passed out with all of the bottles empty.

Was the one who initiated all of the athletic games, she just needs an outlet to blow some steam off.

When she’s not playing in the sun, she lays on her towel and makes designs on herself using sunscreen so she can have some cute marks after she’s done tanning. 

Thought it was adorable that Sir Pentious set up his towel and things suspiciously close to her because it was “the only spot where the sun coated him evenly” (Like what? Dude could not be more obvious.)

Brought a surfboard because she used to love surfing before she died and tries to teach anybody who’s willing to learn. 

Sets off one of her bombs underwater to create the biggest wave anybody’s ever seen (it ends up soaking everybody else, and she has to make it up to them by covering the ice cream bill later).

🐣👹Lucifer👹🐣:

Only came because Charlie insisted that it would be a good father-daughter bonding experience.

Kind of puts everyone on their toes - can they even have fun with the king of Hell watching their every move? (This helps Charlie prolong her nap - nobody wants to joke around or mess with her in front of her dad).

Tensions are high until he joins the volleyball game and shows everyone that yes, the king of Hell can be fun too.

Everyone relaxes after this, but they relax more when Lucifer shyly gives each of them a rubber duck that looks just like them. When Charlie asked him about this, he replied “I guess if they’re your friends, they should be my friends too.”

Has a huge rubber duck inflatable pool float that he brings to float around on.

Claims that he doesn’t like going to the beach, but the matching swim trunks and Hawaiian shirt that he just happened to have in his closet says differently.

🎸👼Adam👼🎸:

Has the original dad bod and will 100% flaunt it and talk about how sexy he is (nobody is listening.)

Wasn’t actually even invited, but he ended up seeing the rest of them there and hoped that he could make them miserable if he hung out just close enough to them.

Steals Cherri’s surfboard and brags about how he’s about to demolish the waves, but absolutely eats shit and will never hear the end of it.

Doesn’t realize Lucifer is there until he sees him glaring at him from a nearby tent and gets scared shitless.

Will deny it if anybody asks, but he’s secretly looking for the perfect seashell to bring back to Heaven and surprise Lute with. 

Everyone genuinely celebrates when he gets bored and finally decides to leave (cue that one duck meme “ADAM!”) 💀

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for choosing to spend time with my friends?

I (24f) and my boyfriend (24m) have been together for three years, and were friends for a long time before that. We don’t live together yet as neither of us make enough money to afford rent along with groceries utilities etc, and I’m about to do an unpaid internship so it’s just not ideal financially.

I am currently working full time and doing graduate school online. This means that we usually only have the evenings and weekends to spend together. He thinks we don’t spend enough time together which is totally valid. We usually just have the evenings and weekends to hang out. I have d&d at 4:00 on Saturdays and church with my family at 10:30am on Sundays, so I can get pretty busy. We usually spend the evenings together and we go to his house most of the time, as he is allergic to cats and my house has 2 of them. So after work, I come home and put my work stuff away and then drive over to his house.

He has mentioned before and just brought up how we don’t spend enough time together. And he’s right. The problem is, he doesn’t realize how many events or friend hangouts I turn down or reject so that I can spend my evenings with him. Not to mention, I don’t do my chores after work because they take away from that and he’ll complain that I’m coming over late and I’ll have to leave soon (I need to wake up early for work). So I basically spend every weekday evening except for one (when he has band practice) at his house. He gets to do all his chores during that time since we’re at his house. We usually spend Saturday mornings and afternoons together until 3:30 when I have to leave for d&d. I play d&d with a tight group of friends. We’re all super close and we only hang out once a week: Saturday for d&d.

Last Saturday I had to leave early from my house where my bf was spending the night because I had forgotten I had a memorial service to attend. I felt really shitty about it and he was upset which I understand, but overall our Saturdays & Sundays have been pretty consistent.

This Saturday my friends decided to meet earlier—1pm— to get ice cream together before our d&d game. I figured it wouldn’t be that big of a deal if I couldn’t hang out more on one Saturday. I texted my bf and told him if he wanted to we could get breakfast together and he could even come with me to get ice cream w my friends if he wants.

He got mad at me saying that we never spend enough time together and all he wants is to spend time with me and that I’m not spending enough time with him. I tried to explain to him that I basically put aside every other event or activity I’m interested in so that we can spend more time together but he’s like “we still don’t spend enough time together.” I don’t want to be that friend that disappears from the group when they’re in a relationship. I value my friends and my graduate school career and I don’t want to give up any of that. I already reject multiple offers from other people who want to hang out or invite me to things because I know my boyfriend will be upset. Now I’m debating on if I should even see my friends today.

I feel like I never have any time to myself anymore and that he’s not listening to me when I tell him how much I’m trying, but I also love my boyfriend and enjoy spending time with him. So, am I the asshole for saying yes to my friends inviting me somewhere before our usual hangout time?

[jeyneofpoole]

As the only bitch I trust with modernisation of asoiaf characters what do you think edmure would be like? Personally I believe he has fallen victim of at least three and a half catfish situations (the half was theon trying to be funny but he got a bit too into it and denies it ever happening when Robb brings it up like 5 months later)

i am so sorry for the late response this was one i had to ponder. hmmmm i think he’s like your sad vaguely twinkish uncle who keeps striking out on tinder and gets sloppy wine-drunk at thanksgiving and gets misty-eyed when he thinks about his highschool lacrosse team (they could have taken the whole thing home if their star player hadn’t strained his achilles tendon, you know) and eventually comes home with a much younger girlfriend who cat and lysa try to bully away because she brings sweet potato casserole to every family gathering when everyone knows that lysa always makes the sweet potato casserole and this undergrad bitch doesn’t even use marshmallows!!!! and also he’s deathly allergic to pecans and chooses to make it a whole thing.

[things-erin-likes]

I know this is wildly different from my usual art posts BUT I have wanted to make it for a long, long time, because I love sharing any knowledge that might help someone else. SO...

If you (A) don't want to spend more than 1 minute on your face routine, (B) don't want to completely change what your face structure looks like with makeup to have a consistent skin appearance and/or (C) have cystic/nodal/regular acne that just doesn't go away no matter what people tell you to do,

then I give to you:

My One Single Product 1 Minute Makeup Tutorial For People Who Don't Wear Makeup

In which I bravely show you my face to illustrate

Before and after on one of my "best" skin days:

It's very likely this is common knowledge for a lot of people BUT I wish I had known it when I was in my teens and struggling with a severe skin condition I thought would eventually go away and never did.

[TLDR: It's a concealer stick that matches your skin]

No, having a skin condition doesn't mean you need to cover it. However, that doesn't mean it can't still hurt your self image, confidence, and relationships with people who give you unsolicited comments on it (because you want to throw them out the window).

SO HERE'S WHAT YOU NEED:

A concealer stick, my preference being Covergirl's CG Smoothers. They're non-comodogenic and somehow seem to help with my acne, maybe just because covering it helps me not pick at it.

Now, I am the pastiest, whitest shade of white, so I use two shades: "Fair" for my face, which has more of a pink hue, and "Neutralizer" (wheeze) for my neck because it gets even less sun than my face, and is both paler and less pink.

You might be able to get along just fine with one tone if you don't get acne on your neck and chest or have a more even skin tone, but the most important thing is to get the shade that matches your skin tone as close as possible.

To do this, either look in a mirror in the most natural light you can find and hold up your hands and arms until you find a spot that matches your face the closest, then compare the makeup in the store to this. OR.... Just bring a little mirror with you to the store.

STEPS:

1. Start with a clean face. (Wipe your face with a wet cloth if you haven't washed your face already that day)

Optional step 2. Put on a little moisturizer if your skin dries out and flakes, like mine does. I'm allergic to my cats so I use a medicated cream in place of moisturizer lmao

3. Swipe the concealer directly onto red spots, scabs, or bumps, and rub it in with your finger making a soft halo that blends in with the rest of your skin.

...and that's it.

You don't have to do your whole face. You're only adjusting the parts that stands out so they blend in and leaving the rest alone. Some days I cover a few spots, other days it feels like my whole face.

It can't always completely everything, but it makes everything much less noticeable. The shape of scabs may still be there:

It won't cover freshly bleeding wounds well, either... But it will cover the red skin around it:

Like with any makeup, always remove it before you go to bed!!! With makeup remover or a cleanser! Cheap, unscented makeup wipes work great for me.

So yeah, I'm 30 and only just now started finally seeing improvement in my own skin because I did my own research and asked a doctor to try treatments for hormonal acne instead of all the antibiotic approaches, meaning I'm on spironolactone and thus also a mandatory birth control. But hey! It's something.

Having control over how my face looks helps my confidence and self image, like controlling how my hair or clothes look. I don't feel like I have to wear it any more than I don't have to wear my hair short, I just like it that way.

I also hope that this might be able to help guys too, or anyone else who feels like they're not "allowed" to wear makeup but still struggle with the look of their own skin, since the lack of any other product means you really don't look like you're "wearing makeup".

Anyway, long post over, time to flee 🏃‍♀️

[z0mb1epuzzy]

i bring you a sfw prompt!

You know of my big white low IQ maine coone!

Id love to know how Chris/Mike/Josh are with their crush's big fluffy dumb cat!!

i headcanon Josh as allergic to cats but loves them 🙁

LITTLE LORE DROP. i am also allergic to cats but had 3 bc i loved them sm…. and i adore your giant goofy cat… so i must write!!

Chris: i instantly clock chris as being the dude at a party to search for the pets before any specific person, he’s social and extroverted, but i also just think he adores animals!!

- a little possible idea, maybe that’s how you and chris would’ve gotten close, both of you are at a party but it’s a little overwhelming, so you two just go into another room, talk amongst yourselves occasionally, and just pet the cat!!

Chris would totally love your pets, in a relationship with him it would be like those tiktoks that are like “when your competition is your own dog/cat”, that’s him.. sometimes you joke that he’s only with you for the cats.

Mike: as we all likely assumed, i picture mike as one of those “i like dogs more.” guys, he’d love your cat, but he’s a little intimidated (not that he’ll admit it), little hesitant pets on the head and honestly just trying to pet it like a dog.. that being said, he’d definitely love playing with your cat(s), buying them little toys or moving his hand around under the blanket to watch them chase it ☹️

- mini hc/idea, he’s like those videos that are like “my dad and the dog/cat he didn’t want”, like he’d act like he didn’t want it on him, by if it curls up in his lap, he’d let it sleep there… petting its little head while it sleeps :(

Josh: He’s naturally, the most uneasy. He’s allergic to cats, and if you have a giant cat (like your maine coone) he’d pet it really hesitantly, like it was gonna eat his fucking face off or something, but he can’t lie… he loves that cat, he just DOESNT love having to have an insane amount of benadryl on him 24/7… but he’ll do what it takes (i am so projecting here). like yes he’s sneezing the whole time… but the second that cat starts purring all is well♥️

- also HIS little hc… if josh was drunk, his inhibitions about petting the cat go out the window, he’d be sitting on the floor kissing it on the head, letting it rub on his face…. the hives and sneezing are an issue for future josh!!

[ohmyeyesmyeyes]

beef with wasps

f!singer x andrei svechnikov

warnings: mentions of anaphylactic shock/severe allergic reactions, swearing, light joking of near death (to be clear: nobody dies in this), some fluff

liked by gracieabrams, rolemodel and 836,217 others

ynofficial: on behalf of y/n - she is conscious, well and in great hands. she told me to spare the details on what happened, but does want you guys to know that after suffering a wasp sting earlier this afternoon, she was rushed to the ER after going into anaphylactic shock. she gave us all quite a scare and will be in overnight for observations, but doctors are positive she'll make a full recovery

S x

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gracieabrams: thinking of you and wishing you the best recovery! <3

fan1: who tf is s?

fan2: that must have been terrifying, so glad she's ok now

fan3: sending love

reneerapp: ❤️❤️

comments for this post have been restricted

liked by olivia_dejonge, haleyluhoo and 921,375 others

ynofficial: they gave me so much fucking adrenalin i have a rocket up my arse rn and he's just gone to the vending machine bc im so hungry so im taking this opportunity to tell you guys that i almost died today but im ok and the reason theres no selfie is bc i look like a pickled dick rn and as charles boyle once said life is a party and im the pinata xxxxx and he did get me flowers without me even asking so im vv in love rn

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fan4: sorry you almost died?????

fan5: babe what did you think anaphylactic shock was

fan6: does the adrenalin also increase the meme usage

fan7: so she almost dies AND reveals she might be in a relationship??? my heart is breaking twice tonight

fan8: ok but the flowers???? she's got a real one there

fan9: i mean i'd like to think if you almost died your partner would get you flowers...

fan10: lmao you'd think so wouldn't you

liked by andrei_svechnikov37, madisonbaileybabe and 926,174 others

ynofficial: back home! i'm now on house arrest because "there aren't any wasps inside" (we have beef with their butts now). needless to say, it was scary for everyone, but as you can see, miley (the cat) is the only one unbothered. i'm currently typing this from under a human giant and i'm loving every second.

i'd also like to take the opportunity to apologise for my loopy instagram posting and let everyone who purchased tickets for the phoenix show know that they will be refunded. again, i'm incredibly sorry for any inconvenience!

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fan11: and you expect me to believe that human giant in the photo is NOT svech???

fan12: he also likes cats

fan13: and in her other post, it was signed off with 's'

fan14: girl don't apologise

fan15: is he ok?

ynofficial: bit teary but we're recovering!

fan16: NO SVECH DON'T CRY EVERYTHING IS OKAY

andrei_svechnikov37: ynofficial you almost died i'm not letting you go that easily

fan17: SVECH HELLO

liked by ynofficial, devonleecarlson and 57,931 others

andrei_svechnikov37: the family emergency has made a full recovery! (thank fuck) i also wanted to come on here and say that i'm unbelievably proud of this girl, and hilariously in love with her

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fan18: crying happy tears this is adorable

fan19: SVECH STOP RUINING MY STANDARDS

fan20: i love how she's wearing red in the last two pictures

ynofficial: shh he hasn't caught on yet

fan21: i've only had y/n and andrei for a day (officially), but if anything happened to them, i would kill everyone in this room and then myself

fan22: am i the only one who wants to know how long they've been dating?

fan23: no!! i do too

ynofficial: you're making me blush

liked by andrei_svechnikov37

fan24: y/n is so precious and idk who andrei is but i love him just for this caption

fan25: svech is definitely a cuddler

liked by ynofficial

liked by andrei_svechnikov37, sydney_sweeney and 1,028,285 others

ynofficial: i can't find the right words to express how happy and grateful i am to have you in my life, so i'm just going to settle with i love you so fucking much that sometimes i can't breathe because of it, okay?

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fan26: is andrei the inspiration behind out of my misery?

ynofficial: yes

fan27: you guys make me sick in a good way

fan28: wow you've got taste y/n

andrei_svechnikov37: saying you can't breathe is a bit too soon

ynofficial: LMAO I DIDN'T EVEN NOTICE

andrei_svechnikov37: i love the love though

fan29: y/n i can't-

fan30: how long have you guys been together?

ynofficial: one and a half years!

fan31: y/n not being overly mushy on instagram and casually announcing she's dating an nhl player is my favourite part of this year so far

[mrghostrat]

almost forgot to fill out this fun ask game, tagged by @chernozemm!

1. Are you named after anyone? if by 'named after' you mean i stole his identity by using his nickname as a teen and now i show up in google searches more than him, sure 🫢 also my mum gave me the middle name she was supposed to have before her dad fucked up the papers and gave her a different one.

2. When was the last time you cried? rewatched the good place a few months ago and fuckin wailed over that finale, again

3. Do you have kids? no ty

4. What sports do you play/ have you played? i am allergic to most forms of movement (but i do love swimming)

5. Do you use sarcasm? only when it's meant to be silly/funny to burn my friends. then yes too often

6. What is the first thing you notice about people? probably how often they talk, if they wait to let other people speak.

7. What's your eye color? blessed with a very pretty brown that goes all soft and light in the sun ✨

8. Scary movies or happy endings? SCARY SCARY SCARY 🔪 i like a satisfying end, even if it doesn't work out "happily"

9. Any talents? i have perfect pitch! altho my singing voice has lost about 80% of its range from HRT

10. Where were you born? a pretty beach town in NSW

11. What are your hobbies? i chronically pick up and immediately drop new hobbies, so i'm in between interests right now (wish i was joking) but i've got gel nail extensions, embroidery, reading, clay sculpture, and working out on the back burner.

12. Do you have any pets? oliver my chihuahua, and bailey my mini lop rabbit :) we also live with @thewolveswolf's cat mikasa. lots of white fur in this household.

13. How tall are you? 5'5"

14. Favorite subject in school? art 😩🤌 hyper fixation gonna fixate.

15. Dream job? i LOVE my current art work, but i still kind of wish i could experience being a full time author. imagine that, pulling in a living just from writing about my guys all day. i'm so looking forward to teaching as well, i think uni level lecturing would be my dream teaching environ.

[egosweetheart]

hi, this isnt an actual art post, i just wanna share a thing i did recently. so hazbin hotel came out. i have mixed feelings on it, but the important thing for this post is, i wanted to redesign some of the characters.

i did angeldust, alastor, lucifer, and husk, because those seemed like they needed the biggest push design wise.

i've seen a lot of redesigns that come for the shows entire design ethos rather than just addressing individual issues, which are all cool and good, but i really wanted to meet vivzie where she's at and focus on improving what's already there with the lore that's available.

i will not be doing any actual fanart for the show or talking about it beyond this post. which, btw, is going to be long as fuck.

tdlr: i did some paint-overs. theyre under the cut next to the original design.

alright, so this one is the most different. why? idk i think alastor could be really cool, but none of the things in his original design speak to his themes or personality at all. if he's a deer, why are his horns hidden? if he's half creole, why is he beige? if he cares about his suit enough to take it to a tailor over one rip, why are there rips in his design?

this is also the start of my crusade against bowties.

so i get the idea behind lucifers design. hes the ringmaster, the rest of the sins are his circus, it makes sense, its very cute. it just needed editing. there's so much white in his costume, it all clutters together visually, you dont know where to focus, and the pops of red just make it even more confusing. by moving all the white up, it keeps the focus on his face. i also gave him a beard because he looks like charlies brother and i'm not allergic to facial hair. i also removed the apple from the hat because it seemed redundant.

i dont know if im 100% happy with how husk turned out, but i am happy he's more readable now. he was so cluttered before, but i removed a lot of it in favor of leaning into the disaster ex-magician angle, and making his vibe slightly more 70's. also, cats with mustaches are adorable, and i like how disheveled he looks in comparison to alastor. alastor is ruining this mans life and i think it should be a little more obvious in his design.

ok this one is personal for 1 reason and 1 reason only: he does not need a fucking bowtie. it just floats there with no visual anchor, right underneath a choker that's essentially doing the same visual footwork and thematically says so much more about angel dusts situation. i also noticed he has like, a feather bustle in the poison musical sequence? so. thats staying to make him more Spider Like. he deserves extra fluff.

the show is overall very whatever to me. i just wanted to see if i could tweak these to make myself happier with them, and i succeeded, and that's all that matters.thank u if you read all this, i wrote it at 1am. MWAH i love you

[rae-and-mezo]

Life After Hogwarts: Ominis Gaunt

Summary: Headcanons for Yours and Ominis's life after Hogwarts!

Warnings:

A/N: I AM DOWN BAD FOR HIM MAN! I am thinking about making this a series with other characters. Let me know who you would like to see next!

First of all, I feel like you guys have been together since the end of seventh year ish? You really fell for each other the summer after sixth year when you both spent it with Sebastian and Anne. Either at your place or Feldcroft.

And he knew you were the one for him.

He flat out asks you one day in seventh year if you would ever like to be married (way in the future though,) and respects your answer either way. Of course, he would love to be called your husband, but he doesn't need a ring to know you love him.

He gets his training to become a ministry worker, taking up a desk job in magical Law Enforcement. It pays fairly well actually, and he enjoys it even if it comes with more paperwork than his liking.

Whatever your job is, he very much is supportive. He dislikes the traveling part if you chose a job that requires it and worries himself sick if you chose something like an Auror or Cursebreaker. But he would never hold you back from what you would like to do.

It doesn't take him long at all to break off from his family after graduation.

All it took was one meeting where he grudgingly took you to meet his parents for dinner.

It doesn't matter if your blood status or views, chances are his family will hate you. And if that's the case, it's the driving factor between Ominis and the rest of the Gaunts. After all, he will stand by you to the very end.

He actually asks you about marriage again, just to see if you are sure about your answer.

If it's no, that's okay! Just expect him to ask again a few years down the road.

If it's a yes, he plans his proposal right away! The man is Ecstatic to marry you.

He is a romantic soul, sure, but he isn't one for giant acts of love. So it's a quiet, sweet proposal in the back garden of your families home. After all, he asked your father for permission only moments before.

It's the same thing with the wedding actually. You both wear wedding attire, but not overly expensive or extravagant clothes. After all, he just broke off from his family and is trying to get his feet underneath him. The wedding is in Feldcroft, and Anne is one of his groomsmen. Sebastian is his Man of Honor of course, and he only invites his cousins that is more like family than his own parents. You only invite your closest family as well.

Instead of a honeymoon, you guys work on a run down cottage not too far from Hogwarts. This also counts for if you aren't married.

If you aren't married, he doesn't care for social rules. He doesn't mind the judgement from living with you out of wedlock! Not at all.

Sebastian is over at your cottage like all the time. He never overstays his welcome, but he might as well live there!

Ominis has always had such a cold and uninviting home, so he tries his best to make your house inviting! He does a good job too. Guests love visiting you two.

Now, you would think I would dive into the children part of this story. Not now.

No, instead, Ominis wants to experience things he never has before. He asks you to take him to muggle pubs, muggle concerts, etc. Even if he can't see, he adores experiencing a world so different from his own. Anything you wanna do, he does as well.

The two of you take a trip to Australia. With how much he loves magical creatures, he wants to see some muggle animals as well. And he thinks Australian accents are funny.

He wants a cat SO BADLY. Of course he would never ask if you don't like cats or are allergic. But if not? Oh boy, you're in for it.

That cat would be his best friend. You are not getting cuddles if the cat is there first, and he talks to it like it's a child.

Honestly the cat prefers you but loves the two of you so much!!

It's basically your first kid.

A circus comes to the small town closest to your cottage and you guys go see it just because you can. Why not? Ominis likes peanuts and finds the music and cheering amusing. Also enjoys a play by play by you!

There was a vendor selling exotic pets...and well one of them was a snake.

Normally Ominis wouldn't bat an eye but the snake started begging him for help because the vendor was abusing his animals.

How are you supposed to say no when your partner is almost in tears over a little snake?

So yeah, you get a new pet.

NOW I TALK ABOUT THE CHILDREN PART OF THIS STORY

I feel like Ominis is indifferent.

He really likes kids actually and would like to have some of his own. But it's not a deep desire. The two of you had talked about it before moving in together and so he already knows your preference.

If you wouldn't like to have children, he is A-OK with that! Just...don't let him turn into a crazy cat man. Because he will. He just can't say no to their fluffy little faces.

If you would like children, he is so happy! Of course, he would love you either way, but he just cannot wait to be a father once he gets the idea in his head.

Though, because of his genes, I am not sure he would want biological children. After all, he isn't proud of being a Slytherin descendant or the fact that his parents were cousins.

If you would like biological children, he could make an exception after some convincing.

If not, he is so excited to adopt! I feel like he would rather adopt an older kid rather than a baby but you know. Your opinion weighs heavily on his too.

Either way, he cries when he finds out you're expecting/adoption went through.

That night he cries himself to sleep on your shoulder and wakes up still crying and smiling so hard it hurts.

He lowkey wants to shove it in his parents' face that he's going to be a father with the most amazing person he has ever met and they won't get to witness any of it!

Of course he apparates to Sebastian's and cries again, to him, for what feels like hours.

He breaks once he meets his child. You've never seen him cry hard before, only silent tears and little sobs. But he's crying like a baby because he just is so happy and can't believe he is at this point with somebody he loves.

If you don't want children, he asks if you can raise Nifflers in the back garden, or maybe get a Unicorn? He would build the stable with Sebastians help. Boy loves his animals SO MUCH

Mornings with him where he makes breakfast and you set the table, both of you listening to his favorite record on the Gramaphone.

Ominis can be rather playful, so expect him to tickly your hips while passing through, or to jump out and scare you when you least expect it.

And after YEARS of living in the same house, he smacks his head on the doorframe of your kitchen. Because, like, he's tall and the cottage is not.

Yes, the bed is perfectly comfortable, but like naps on the floor or in the garden hit different.

You start a little flower garden in the back yard, and he really loves to sit in it. The smells are just so nice! But he would rather gouge out his eyes than ruin your garden so he never stays out there for long. No matter how many times you tell him he won't step on anything.