#not etho guys i’m making it obvious this time

[ralburry]

wizard baby

[swamp-chicken]

wl ficlet episode 3, 596 words

After a certain amount of time, words stop to have meaning. Bdubs guesses it’s that time, because nothing he says seems to matter and nobody seems to care. He’s in an alliance, but they’re not an alliance. He’s with Etho, but Etho isn’t with him.

Words are all Bdubs has these days. He used to think actions were enough, but that idea died a few worlds ago. What does it mean when he saves one person and kills another? He thought that it made him loyal, a stalwart companion. But then people started saying he was scared instead.

What does it mean when he does everything for the people he loves, but he only gets mistrust in return? What does it mean when he wastes blood, sweat, and tears on them and they turn on him in the end?

All that’s left are words. So when Bdubs wakes up, peering up at a clear blue sky that should be a ceiling, it’s obvious to him what he has to do to make things right. So maybe things had been tense. So maybe Tango and Etho had preferred to work a little separately from him. So what? It wasn’t something he couldn’t fix. A few well-placed words and they’d all be back like buddies again, the crimes of the past forgiven.

There’s a spring in Bdubs’ step when the session starts, when he gathers up with Tango and Etho to start strategizing. He doesn’t dilly-dally before cutting to the chase.

“I am going to start with an apology session.”

Etho and Tango exchange skeptical glances but Bdubs is undeterred. They may be skeptical now, but just wait.

Bdubs knows how to make his voice quiet and sincere. He knows how to make his gaze soft and imploring. “Tango,” he starts. “I’m sorry for stabbing you in the back when we were on BEST team.”

Bdubs waits, brimming with eagerness. Once Tango forgives him, they can start building trust again. They can be an alliance. And then Etho will want to stand with them, of course. Following along, just like the old days.

But—Tango’s blinking at him, no warmth in his gaze. And then Etho speaks. “A couple years late, isn’t it?”

Bdubs doesn’t feel very springy anymore. “This is genuine.” The words barely come out from behind his clenched teeth.

Etho is watching his reaction with a twist of amusement. “Why today out of all days?”

Sitting on Etho’s horse, Bdubs had thought they’d worked this all out. He thought he had uncovered the root of the issue, had talked everything through. Words! Leaping out of Bdubs’ mouth and into Etho’s ears. But something was still festering.

Bdubs can fix it. “And I apologize to you, Etho, for getting the best horse in Minecraft.” Words, tumbling out of his mouth too hasty. There’s no time to imbue them with sincerity, to warm up his imploring gaze.

Two disbelieving stares are turned against him. Bdubs feels backed into a corner, his hackles are up. “And I’ve been doing some self-reflecting and I hate myself!”

Words so strong that they can’t refuse him, that they can’t doubt his sincerity.

Etho turns to Tango. “You think this is a manipulation tactic?”

“I do,” Tango sighs. “I’m already on to his play here.”

Etho laughs. “This guy— this guy doesn’t feel any remorse!”

There's an ache in the back of Bdubs' throat. He swallows it down, indignant. After a certain amount of time, words stop to have meaning. Nothing Bdubs does matters, and nobody seems to care.

“You’re right, I don’t feel any remorse!” Bdubs smirks. "I can't believe you guys saw through that so fast." They’re laughing. He can laugh too.

[frozenjokes]

Rage Room (I’m Loving A Losing Battle, But I Can’t Quite Seem To Let Go)

in which aromantic scar finally tells his friends what’s been happening between him and Grian, and how he processes the space between them

“It’s just- not fair!” Scar smashed the bottle against the tile floor, the glass pelting the ankles of his reinforced pants.

Bdubs clapped behind him, though stopped when Scar turned around, visibly not in the mood. Admittedly he knew he was shooting low when he went on, but Scar didn’t care, “And I’m kind of pissed off about Etho! If the roles were switched, I would be there, and he said he’d be here last time he missed.”

“Oi,” Cleo cut in, about as unamused as Scar figured they’d be. “No friendly fire.”

“Is it really friendly fire if he’s not here.” Scar huffed, but Cleo knew better than to take his words at face value, and shut him up with a firm glare.

“And you better start talking before I make you pay for all of this.” Her words were rugged, but Scar knew she didn’t mean it, and he could take as much time as he needed. But really, if he was taking shots at Bdubs, he probably should cut to the chase. This was why they were here. This was why they had all made this pact in the first place.

“Grian is.” Scar started, stilted, “Sorry, Bdubs. I shouldn’t have said that. Grian won’t talk to me anymore. He doesn’t- want to talk to me.”

“What?” Bdubs said, eyes flying open, and yeah, no one here was really caught up with his whole.. situation. Anything that felt close to Mumbo he tended to avoid, and basically everything about Grian in the past weeks was Mumbo adjacent.. and also a little sensitive. Not something he was eager to talk about. Scar was more than a little pent up, and based on the expressions of concern across Cleo and Bdubs’ faces, it must have been pretty obvious. “Weren’t you guys hanging out nearly everyday for- I don’t know, it’s been a month at least, right? Did something happen? Hasn’t Grian been driving you around everywhere, too? You’ve sure been asking me a lot less.”

“Yeah. We were.” Scar spoke stiffly, picking up another empty bottle and spinning it in his hands. He chucked it at the wall, aiming at the newly set up targets Cleo had implemented a couple weeks ago. A good choice. Fit with the theme of the axe throwing/rage room combo. The bottle shattered near the bullseye, unsurprising, given their whole friend group had pretty tight aim. Still satisfying. “Until he went and fell in love with me.”

The memories burned like open wounds, like red, angry flesh, like sunburns on your eyelids, like the stinging smell of bleach. Cleo said something, some sort of assent, but Scar didn’t hear it, smashing two more bottles for release, though he didn’t feel any less like his ribs had been torn from his chest, hanging limply on hooks, dripping on his face from his place on the cold ground, bleeding out, dying, but never quickly enough.

“I don’t like labels, alright, you all know this, but Grian says aromantic, and that works for now, because I don’t love him like he loves me and that’s fine. That’s fine! That. Is. Fine.” Scar took a bat, needing something bigger, needing more release, and the old TV would work just fine, “And you know how I feel about dating. I like it. I like to get to know strangers, I like to feel things out, and I like to be close! But you know who I don’t like to date?” The question wasn’t meant to be answered. Scar swung his bat, splitting the TV screen with a satisfying crack. “Friends. Good friends. Friends that mean a lot, friends that I can’t afford to lose when everything goes to shit.”

Scar hit the TV a couple more times, physically battling away distress, “I was so afraid when he brought it up- dating. I was so afraid. I couldn’t just date Grian, because it would end and I would lose him and maybe he’d say we could still be friends and I would say yes! Yes, please, please can we still be friends, and he would say that’s okay, and then two weeks later he’d slam me with a message about ‘needing space’ and ‘not wanting to talk for a while’ and suddenly, suddenly my heart’s being ripped out of my chest and stomped on, but it would be fine, right? It would be fine, because after he’s taken his time, we could be friends again, and things could return to normal. No!” The TV was hardly satisfying to hit anymore, reduced to shattered glass and warped plastic under Scar’s assault.

“It never just. Goes back to normal. You try, and you try and you try, but they just can’t do it, they just can’t love you anymore, and suddenly your best friend is slipping away and there’s fucking nothing you can do about it. Because you dated them. Because you took things ‘to the next level,’ because you made something volatile without even knowing, and the next thing you know, it’s blown up in your face, and you’ve been completely blindsided again.” Scar’s arms shook, and gently, from behind, Cleo laid a hand on his shoulder, sliding down his arm to take the bat he was gripping so tightly. Scar let go when they touched his hands, but his teeth remained locked, grinding near painfully.

“Deep breaths, Scar. Breathe with me. Let me count for you,” and Cleo did, counting to five and back again, forcing Scar to take a step back. Scar wasn’t someone who particularly valued meditation or breathing; it was often too difficult to focus, especially alone, and he was easily frustrated knowing how he should be feeling, but Cleo had a way of grounding him, and when Bdubs was doing the same exercises at his side, Scar didn’t feel so stupid. And it did help. Fives minutes to breathe really did wonders sometimes; it was a shame Scar couldn’t quite manage to utilize the tool as effectively when he was alone. Not that he ever remembered to try.

And now it was quiet, and Scar was so vulnerable, and there was no more anger to hide behind, because it was all just sadness, stiff and aching so impossibly deep.

“I thought if we didn’t.. date.. I thought things could just be normal. That nothing would change. But every awful thing just got expedited- he doesn’t want to see me, he doesn’t want to talk to me- he needs space, he said he needed space, but I know what that means now.” Scar had to sit down, and Bdubs joined him, Cleo standing close by. “I feel so helpless. And it didn’t even matter. I just wish I knew so badly, so I could have said yes, so at least we might have had a chance before it all went to shit. I could keep my friend a little bit longer. I wish I understood how he felt. I wish I felt what he felt. Maybe it wouldn’t be so hard.” Scar let his head drop to his hands, voice muffled under his palms, “I just kinda hate myself sometimes.”

Cleo put a hand on his shoulder, a question of touch, and one that Scar accepted with closed eyes. “It would still be hard, Scar. I can promise you that. If this isn’t what you want to hear right now, then you can let me know, but I have to think Grian and your other exes of the past who you haven’t kept in contact with were and are just as torn up as you. Maybe they need to let go for themselves, but I can tell you from personal experience, that doesn’t make it hurt any less. It doesn’t make you miss them any less.”

“But when people leave me, it’s always because in some way, their lives would be better without me,” Scar felt like wailing, but in reality, his speech was far more soft, “And my life is always worse. It’s always worse. Like I’m just a plague on my friends, and I have no idea how to fix myself to keep this from happening.”

Bdubs squeezed his hand to get his attention, and Scar knew what was coming, he just couldn’t love himself right now.

“There’s nothing to fix, Scar. You’re one of the most delightful people I know, and I mean that. The way you navigate the world is inspiring.”

“Just doesn’t feel like it right now.”

“It doesn’t have to,” Cleo said, something faraway about the words, “You just should know, that’s all. How we feel.”

“I just wish I was normal.”

“I don’t,” Bdubs snorted, something so passionately reactionary, Cleo laughed, and Bdubs himself looked a bit surprised by his own words, then a tad embarrassed, “I mean, come on. You’re a complete monster, and I love it. I love how comfortable you are about touch, I love how physical you are, and I love how normal you make it feel. Sometimes I want to fall asleep on my friends’ shoulder, or hold hands, or just be held, you know? And no one does it like you, Scar, no one. I think everyone ought to take a couple pages from your book.”

Scar wasn’t quite sure what to do with that, but it wasn’t the type of thing you argued about. You just had to accept it. In all honesty, having people to love him when he couldn’t manage it himself felt indescribably secure. Like a heated blanket wrapped tightly over his shoulders when he was so, so cold. But he couldn’t acknowledge it either, not when he couldn’t breathe the words. So he let it hang, hoping he’d remember to say something later. He knew he would. For now, Scar dodged around the words, stuck in his own raw truth.

“I don’t want to go through this again.”

“I know,” Cleo kept their hand on his shoulder, and Scar wanted to cry.

“And I- Okay, so I can’t really talk about this.. NDAs and such, but I was working on something with someone- something cool, all three of us, Grian included. And at the same time Grian.. cut contact.. I haven’t been able to reach this other uh- colleague, and I don’t know what happened! I don’t know anything, and I have no way of contacting this other guy, and Grian doesn’t know either, and I was so excited, but it just feels like everything is falling apart around me. And- and don’t be mean about the other guy, please, it’s not his fault.” Cleo looked quite skeptical about that, but a pleading look from Scar was enough to get her to leave well enough alone, “I just wish I knew why. Or if he was coming back. Might not have been able to communicate that anyway though, there’s a bit of a language barrier.”

“Can’t use google translate?” Bdubs asked, and Scar couldn’t stop the bitter laugh that escaped his throat.

“Hadn’t thought of that,” he mumbled, which was enough to get Bdubs to let it go. Cleo didn’t look happy, but she didn’t push either.

“That fucking sucks,” she said instead, and Scar laughed in earnest, along with Bdubs, the entire air feeling just a little bit lighter.

“It does,” Scar sighed, resting a cheek on his fist, “Guess I have to find something new to throw myself into. I just really wanted this. I really wanted this.”

There was a long silence, Scar having nothing else to say, and his friends in a similar boat. There wasn’t much to say. They knew. Scar knew they understood. But there was nothing anyone could do. Nothing that could make this any less horrible. But Bdubs did perk up after a minute, catching Scar and Cleo’s attention

“We could go skiing!” Bdubs suggested, to a chorus of groans from Scar and Cleo. Bdubs huffed, affronted as he crossed his arms, “You two need to live a little. Even if you suck, you’re both exhausted by the end of the day, which would do Scar some good in my opinion, and I know you’d be able to take the time off for an impromptu trip.”

“I don’t even think you like skiing,” Cleo rolled their eyes, a laugh under her voice, “You went on one trail ride in those mountains and it changed your life, that’s what. There are no wild horses out there, Bdubs, the guide lied to you.”

“She did not lie! There are horses, and they’re going to see me and know.”

“Know.. what, exactly?” Scar teased, and Bdubs puffed up, as if this was the most blasphemous question Scar could have asked.

“They will just know. And anyway, Etho believes there’s horses out there too, he does, and he wants to see them just as much.”

“Pretty sure Etho is also fucking with you,” Cleo said, smug, and Bdubs gasped.

“Never!” But something stopped him from ranting on; a short pause, a bit of uncertainty. A guilty glance in Scar’s direction. “I’m really sorry he’s not here. I told him- I don’t know. He said something came up last minute and wouldn’t explain. I’m not happy with him either- quite frankly, I’m embarrassed.”

“I shouldn’t have said anything,” Scar rubbed his neck, frowning, “It doesn’t really bother me much, Bdubs. I don’t want you to feel bad.”

“It’s fine if it bothers you! It bothers me! And you’re right, he’s not here, so I think a little friendly fire is well deserved,” Bdubs paused, eying one of the few bottles that were left, “May I?”

“Be my guest.”

Bdubs snatched at a bottle, flipping it in his hand, nearly dropping it trying to look cool, then whipping it at the target across the room, the entire thing smashing right on the bullseye.

“Oh, score!” Scar smiled, and Bdubs pumped his fist.

“Yes! You know, I already feel better. This is great, Cleo, have I told you this is great?”

Cleo looked pleased, exactly the cat who got the cream, “You have. And I know. So how about you boys throw back a couple beers to replace these bottles, and we do a little axe throwing.”

“Are you paying?” Scar asked, hopeful, innocent, but Cleo snorted, shaking her head.

“Uh, no. Don’t let that hold you back, though.”

“Oh, come on,” Bdubs whined, but not without his signature grin, “What’s the point of free rage room therapy hour if it’s not all free?”

“I’m not going to make you pay for the axe throwing either, and that is not included in our little deal, so the least you can do is drink.”

“You can’t make us pay to axe throw with you because we all know you’re going to whoop our asses,” Scar shot back in fake accusation, but Cleo shrugged, a crooked smile across her lips.

“You have fun.”

“I do,” Bdubs assented, earning a sharp jab from Scar’s elbow.

“We don’t! Unless you buy us each a beer, then we do.”

“No.”

“Please?”

“No.”

“Okay fine,” Scar sighed, fully intending on a large tip regardless, since despite her sharp tongue, Cleo would still refuse any sort of compensation for an outing like this, “But you also have to drink.”

Cleo scoffed, the smile never leaving their face. “Who do you think I am?”

***

It was fun. Of course it was fun. Scar lost pretty miserably in nearly every round, though that could be accurately attributed to the fact he was more than a little tipsy, and Bdubs, always spying an opportunity to get an edge, took full advantage. Though, to his credit, Bdubs was having a great day in general, overtaking Cleo in score multiple times, and even winning one or two games. A feat, even against an inebriated Cleo, which, in all honesty, was pretty much the only way Scar or Bdubs could ever surpass her. Etho.. It was safe to say Etho had little talent for the sport. Didn’t matter how much instruction he got, he was nothing short of miserable every time all four of them got together to play. Actually, out of the four of them, Etho was probably the only person who improved when he was drunk, which was always hilarious to see. You’ve never seen a fire lit under someone’s ass like you did when Etho managed to squeak ahead of Bdubs or Scar, the cackling of Cleo only furthering their panic.

Scar did wish Etho was here. He wished he wasn’t so flakey sometimes.

Regardless, when they were done, Bdubs was only two steps away from sober and plenty able to drive. Scar was relieved to have to ride, and even more so that he hadn’t brought his own car in the first place. It was a nice drive home, anything but quiet, and really, just what Scar needed. The less time he spent alone with his own thoughts, the better. Though, after such a nice evening, tonight was going to be a little easier.

Thanking Bdubs for the ride, Scar stepped out onto the cobblestones once they reached his apartment, taking a deep breath before going inside. It was okay. He was going to be okay.

But there was one little habit he had developed, a little something he couldn’t quite shake despite knowing it wasn’t doing him many favors. It had only been a week since Mumbo had disappeared, but Scar refused to miss it if the mermaid ever did return- he couldn’t, even if Grian wouldn’t be in the picture anymore. This still meant something. Scar wasn’t about to give it up so easily.

The trail cams were still open on his monitors when he sat at his desk. Of course they were. Scar never closed them.

So there he sat, chin in his hands, eyes glazed as he watched every angle of that little cove. The trees, waving gently in the breeze. The sand, shifting ever so slightly in the presence of bugs and crabs. But mostly he watched the water. Scar never stopped watching the water.

[gammagoop]

my top picks for who i would want to see added to the life series (in no particular order)

Doc— i would bet money on him finding ren and teaming up with him no more than 10 minutes into the world. he would have the craziest beef with everyone on the whole server. you would be able to hear him and bdubs arguing for miles. also he hasn’t played with a lot of the non-hermit members (outside of some being in the empires crossover) and i’m a sucker for unlikely collaborations! it would be very much unlike his usual content, too, and i can see him treating it as a UHC at first but then realizing that everyone else is being crazy silly about it instead

Pixlriffs— i’ve wanted to see him in the life series since 3rd life, mostly just because he does a lot of hardcore stuff. it would be outside of his usual content, similarly to doc, but whatever i wanna see him have fun! i feel like pix rarely gets into legitimate conflicts with others, but the times he has have been so so fun. i’m a big pix fan. do you guys remember in empires s1 when fwhip pranked him (im pretty sure it was fwhip anyway) and pix started critiquing the execution of the prank. need more of that. need joel to fail at a trap again and pix tell him that it was mid. i can see him being allies with etho which makes me giddy and happy

MythicalSausage— i think everyone wants sausage in a season. NEEED him in a season with ren. need them to do crazy cheesy corny roleplay. i was going to say that if he was in 3rd life he would’ve been a part of the red army but actually i think bdubs would have crowned him king of the crastle and sausage would’ve been launching nukes at dogwarts. he just needs to be there ok. and also i want him to meet skizz

Gem— an obvious choice and a legitimately likely one. so she goes on this list

also can we please bring lizzie and or mumbo back for a full season? at some point?

i think thats all ive got— i wanted to add some non-empires non-hermits like bigb and skizz and martyn but i really do not watch any other series . so. ah. sorry

[basedkikuenjoyer]

Spiderwebs Pt.2: For Whom the Bell Tolls

For this story we’re going to need to go a little further back than Dressrosa. Back to a time that felt so long ago even when Dressrosa was in serialization. Back to the island One Piece became about something bigger. Doflamingo is such a fun villain because he’s built so well. But we establish his ethos through Bellamy. This is such an amazing scene, where the beauty of Mock Town the classic pirate haven comes into full swing. It’s not unlike Zoro & Wano down the line; this island offers a lot of temptation but Luffy keeps his eyes on the prize.

The point with Bellamy though is how he’s changed come Dressrosa. Why he’s stalled on that path. I don’t think I really need to spell out how antithetical Bellamy is being to the core of this series in Jaya. It’ll also be great for distinguishing Blackbeard as a villain. Bellamy & Doflamingo are the “real” pirates that are interested in taking the money and power they see in front of them, but BB is still up for finding the big treasure even if he’s willing to go about it the “wrong” way.

The climax of Skypiea, ringing the bell, is still potentially my favorite moment in the series. The big goofy shadow in the sky as Cricket looks on. But of course everyone on Jaya would have seen/heard it. It was only a couple of days after that Straw Hat kid whopped Bellamy and ran off. Surely it was the talk of the town! Bellamy lost everything to follow suit but he made it. There was an island in the sky, there was a perfectly good “scientific” explanation for it. Be a little more open-minded yo. Quit acting like you know everything because grand scheme of things Bellamy wasn’t really that noteworthy of a pirate. How about the idea of him mentioning it to Doffy, who could easily casually know “yeah, Sky Islands are just a thing dude.”

Between here and then though we meet Doflamingo. Quite a few times. He’ll get his own but I care about two big themes that pop up intermittently. His introduction and followup with Bellamy/Sarquiss on Jaya is all about inducing infighting. That’s a big aspect of Wano’s “quiet” theme I’m always on about. Then the symbolism of his talk about SMILEs, the side effect we learn come Wano, and how Bellamy is “The Hyena.” An animal famous for it’s laughter. Bellamy is often laughing but it’s a cold, heartless kind of it. Even here, it’s what he’s bringing up leaving behind.

This is where the complexity comes in. Luffy from way away on a whim cheers for Bellamy. There’s no meaning to it. He doesn’t hold grudges and the man has changed for the better. That’s laudable. His goal in and of itself is not detestable, he just wants to earn someone’s respect. Wrong man to try and earn the respect of but we’ll get to that in a minute. What I love in hindsight is this idea of Luffy doing something innocuous that ends up wounding the guy’s pride. And it’ll end up coming back around in the clash later. It’s a big element of Luffy & Bellamy’s story this arc. Luffy casually introduced a big hurdle by doing something Bellamy took as shameful. Pride & Shame are obvious big themes for Wano later, case in point:

This underpins a lot of how Luffy acts towards Kiku. He respects her after Bakura. Narratively its why you would rather her see her father figure show it’s okay to ask for help than a classic “I want to live” or “Save me, Luffy.” It’s why 1042 was such a vindicating chapter. Once everything else below was stripped away, we hammer the core themes of Kiku’s story as Izo’s flows directly into Luffy’s. That’s still core, he didn’t get distracted, but after Bellamy he wants to respect her pride. This is there from the get-go, it’s a barely subtle part of the Sumo match that he’s weirdly like, “yeah yeah if you can somehow beat me do what you want with Kiku.” Why he feels a need to pipe up at Sanji’s advances, not making a scene but slipping in a “hey, she’s really tough.” The significance to her story in Chapter 1000 is Luffy looking up to see Izo (who he should recognize) there with the group.

Izo’s the one who makes this mistake. Don’t dote on her like the baby sister of the group. Respect that she’s playing the part. He gets it after he gets a snippy response, Kin’s begrudgingly accepted it, but still the segment immediately flips to Neko learning about Carrot/Wanda giving into their anger and Yamato just “itching” to fight. Given an extra layer through Kin’emon with his words at the end of the Raid about respecting a decision a woman summons all of her courage to make alongside the little bit about finally showing she was next to Toki. Anyways, the idea is that Luffy believably learned his lesson in how to navigate someone like that through Bellamy. An example of how careless words can have unintended effects. 

Breaking the rule a little bit here, but it’s important. Because we’ll already set that up...then give Bellamy the big lesson about misplaced loyalty. Doflamingo knew what he was doing making Luffy waste time with him. Putting him down with that big punch first would have been kinder, it would have let you get back to Law faster. Don’t lose sight of the goal, Bellamy needs to see Doflamingo fall too. He’s put his faith in the man this long and never seen a real reason to doubt that. This whole fight is just heartbreaking, even get the big fake smile to drive the point home.

I find it really interesting too that this chapter, Bellamy the Pirate, is followed up by the SBS segment spelling out Monet & Sugar’s connection. How they followed Doflamingo out of being rescued from a bad situation. There’s also another thing Bellamy in Dressrosa has going for him that we mentioned a lot for Kiku in Wano. Being the more mundane example of the arc’s core themes. The grounded counterpart to the fantastical symbols like living toys, the classic puppetmaster, and repressed memories.

[dmwrites]

It wasn’t that Etho was scared of the fort he’d heard was ruled by fairies. He didn’t do “scared”, went against the cool, collected vibes he tried to exude at all times. But, breaking into the fort and finding four beings, all still bristled from Skizz’s failed enchanting table heist, was rather intimidating.

Lizzie was their leader, that much was obvious. The other three, Ren, Cleo, and BigB all gathered behind her, leaned in like she was a magnet and they were the metal pulled into her sides. As soon as Etho emerged fully into the clearing, Ren came forward at once, going on and on about a break in (what? him? never.), while BigB went over to the entrance, sword out, and Cleo stayed lurking behind Lizzie.

“Stand down, Ren.” Lizzie said, and Ren backed off at once, resuming his post on some logs. “What is your business here, Ethoslab?”

“I came to see if the legends were true about the fort of fairies, and it seems to be. You have the enchanting table.” Etho said, taking a few cautious steps forward. The table was on a small stone platform, like it was being served on a platter.

“Oh, and I’m sure this visit is completely unrelated and coincidental from the visit we just had from your friend, Skizzleman.” Cleo said waspishly.

“Who?” Etho asked.

“Guys, I think Skizz and Bdubs are conversing over on the other side of the river.” BigB said, spyglass out. Lizzie sighed, seeming stressed.

“So, just curious, who’s the big bad guard dog here?” Etho asked, eyes flicking to Ren, then landing on Cleo. Cleo tilted her head at him, taking a step closer to Lizzie and cycling through an arsenal of weapons.

“Me, of course. I will protect the shadow queen with my life, as she so gave me one of her own.” Ren said in his usual dramatic fashion.

“Of course, Ren.” Etho replied, turning his gaze back to the dog. “Big and strong, you are. Went from a king to a knight. It’s noble, almost. Wouldn't you agree, Lizzie?”

He took a step towards the girl with the pink hair, only to be bodily pushed back by Ren. Cleo, on the other hand, reached for Lizzie, pulling her hand away when she saw Etho watching her through Ren’s fur.

“Down, Ren. He’s only teasing.” Lizzie said, uncertainty in her voice.

“So, you’re her knight, Ren. Makes sense. So, Cleo, what skin do you have in the game then, huh?” Etho asked, tilting his head at her. “Kind of odd, a fairy teaming up with a rotting corpse.”

“You keep this word nonsense up, and you’ll be a real rotting corpse.” Cleo replied, but Etho knew she was shaken too. Thats what Etho was good at, that’s what he did. Plant those seeds of doubt, ask Cleo why she is so dedicated to a facade of a queen. And speaking of planting seeds…

“Well, I think my cue to leave came and went, so I’ll be going now. BigB, could I chat to you for a moment?” Etho asked, passing out the front gate.

“Uh, yeah, sure.” BigB said uncertainly, glancing back at Cleo, who shrugged at him. Etho kept spinning the web, connecting the people and relationships together in his mind. Cleo and Lizzie… and odd pair for sure. And Cleo, well, if there was any further reason to stay away from the ring of trees, it was because of her, no one else. Cleo scared Etho. And if Cleo had something, someone to fight for, well, it would be wise to stay out of her way.

[benbamboozled]

Inspired by a recent discovery regarding Barbara and a sniper rifle (I can send pics if you wanna see) who do you see among bat affiliates as most likely to kill, or if they have, kill again?

PLEASE POST PICS PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!

Ahem…

ANYWAY, let’s go ahead and just leave Jason as a free space.

I’m going to break this up into Batfam Who Have Killed (And How Likely They Are To Kill Again), and Batfam Who Haven’t Killed (And How Likely They Are To Do So).

(Also, sticking with the usual “core,” minus Jay for obvious reasons, so—Alfred, Bruce, Barbara, Dick, Cass, Steph, Tim, and Damian.)

(I’m also leaving Duke off because I just don’t know much about his character, I still have so many arcs to catch up on.)

NOW…

Batfam Who Have Killed (And How Likely They Are To Kill Again)

Alfred is number one on the list. He’ll straight up kill people (his weapon of choice is a goddamn SHOTGUN) and pretty much only holds back out of consideration for Bruce.

Next up I’d say Damian, because, as per the recent Robin series, he’s pretty much Krombopulos Mike from Rick and Morty (he just loves killin). Granted, he knows killing is bad and yadda yadda, but…kid wants to cut loose, and he’s good at it. Also, he’s trying to figure out his “thing.”

Third is Dick, in this category because he did, canonically, kill the Joker. Honestly, metatextually, I don’t think Dick is going to kill anyone again (even if Batman can bring them back to life). I think he’s become too “core” to the entire Batman ethos. (Hence why he keeps being chosen to kill Batman in the horror elseworlds, lol.) On a character level, I think Dick would absolutely kill again, BUT I think it would be less of a “I am choosing this” the way I see Alfred (and could see Damian) doing it, and more of an act of desperation or intense stress.

Fourth is Cass. OUTSIDE OF SOME HORRIBLE OOC BITS WE DON’T TALK ABOUT, Cass is the Batfam member who most believes in Batman’s No Killing philosophy. It’s not an optics things for her, or because it’s Batman’s rules, or about a symbol…she genuinely, whole-heartedly believes that killing is wrong. (But she did kill a guy so she goes in this category.)

Okay, now…

Batfam Who Haven’t Killed (And How Likely They Are To Do So)

Okay, possibly controversial, I’m going to put Tim as number one, for two reasons.

One—Captain Boomerang Death Trap.

Two—In the Robins mini he argues for letting the guy died who killed his mom and paralyzed his dad. It turns out to be (*sigh*) someone disguised as him, BUT their deception was based on Tim’s psychological profile, so even Tim’s like “Yeah, no, I probs woulda done the same thing, lol.”

So, yeah, Tim can definitely get pushed too far.

Next is Barbara! She’s actively associated with heroes who kill, her thoughts when Dick killed the Joker were “idk, maybe he shoulda stayed dead…would that’ve been bad…???” She’s the one I can most see choosing to kill someone as part of her philosophy, but she’s never put anyone in a death trap, so she’s second.

Third is Steph. Mostly because she’s one of the least likely Batfam members to completely fucking lose it, and I can’t see her taking up killing as an active philosophy. (Even outside of the fact that she believes in the Bat, I think if she were on the edge, she wouldn’t want to damage her relationship with Cass.)

Finally, there’s Bruce. Okay, this one is tricky because, on the one hand, Bruce is never going to outright kill someone in the actual canon continuity. It’s just not going to happen.

On the OTHER hand, he’s tried to kill people multiple times(!!!)—both in a “I’m making the active choice to kill this person” way AND a “heat of the moment” kind of way—and only been stopped by circumstances/other Batfam members.

So, metatextually, he’s last in this category, because it just won’t happen. On a character level, he’s first, because Bruce Wayne is like…constantly one ill-timed Kick Me sign away from finally going ape shitt.

OKAY WELP WENT AHEAD AND WROTE AN ESSAY! SOOOO there you have it!

Everyone, please feel free to disregard if it doesn’t line up with your thoughts, and apologies if I left out stuff from canon that would have impacted the list—see note above about Duke and being behind on reading.

[redorich]

First of all I really love your Hermit Canyon au and have read throughathe posts multiple times. Secondly I think Tango deserves to open up a bedrock service to trap the unsuspecting dsmp members. And thirdly I'm a bit sad that this au is going to be coming to an end but it's been lovely to read.

There's a problem on the Dream SMP that needs to be addressed. None of them realize that canon lives are gone, because they don't lose them often enough to notice. The Hermits wrack their brains trying to come up with a solution, some way to prove it.

Grian suggests a death game, like Demise. The idea is immediately vetoed. They're trying not to traumatize these people further, thank you. Joe suggests a treatise on the fleeting nature of life and how embracing it in order to reject humanity and become primatial will allow one to achieve a higher state of being which can then be conflated with the concept of immortal life. Just as Joe is really hyping himself up, getting ready to write and mass-distribute a pamphlet like Thomas Paine's Common Sense, Cleo bluntly informs him that that's too many words. Next option.

Some ideas are thrown around of Hermits killing each other in fun games to show the other players that a little bit of death is harmless, a fun treat.

Meanwhile, Scar, who forgot to show up to the meeting, is up on the surface wandering around as he surveys the land for a good spot to put a megabase. This would be much easier with an elytra; however, when he asked Xisuma why they can't go to the end here Scar was bombarded with a slew of confusing admin words. He's sure Xisuma will explain later.

There's a little shop down the road that Scar hasn't seen before. He's certain that it has Hermit written all over it-- not literally, of course, but the structure, size, and blocks used make it obvious. There's a group of native Dream SMP players huddled around the entrance, which grabs his attention.

"Well hello there," he says, channelling his inner Obi Wan Kenobi as he always does when he says that.

The other players, who he recognizes as Foolish, Tubbo, and Ranboo, whisper among themselves and immediately straighten up when he addresses them. It's as though they're attempting to say with their body language, Hello! No shenanigans here, nope, none at all.

"Hello," Foolish says. "Would you happen to know who built this store?"

Scar makes a considering noise in the back of his throat, pacing around the side of the build and back as he tries to guess. "Definitely a Hermit," he says. "and probably one of the redstoners. This doesn't look like Mumbo-- or Etho for that matter... Maybe Doc, or possibly Tango or Impulse? That would be my guess."

The nervous-looking ender-boy (Ranboo, Scar believes) leans down to Tubbo's height to whisper in his ear. Tubbo nods, waits a second, nods again, and Ranboo stands back up.

"Are they trustworthy?" Tubbo says.

Scar's brows draw together slightly at the question, wondering what the group is getting at. "What do you mean?"

"Jack went in that shop half an hour ago, and he still hasn't come out yet," Foolish says plainly.

"I'm sure it's nothing," Scar says with a relaxed smile, opening the door. "I'll go check on him, see? There's nothing dangero--"

The others watch as a piston triggers and Scar immediately plummets into a hole far below. The piston fires again and covers up the scene of the crime as though nothing ever happened. Tubbo snorts a laugh, and Ranboo and Foolish look at each other over Tubbo's head.

------------

Jack bashes his forehead against the bedrock in front of him like he has been doing for the past half-hour. He's absolutely stuck, and the only way out is death.

All of the sudden, another man's voice comes screaming toward the bottom of the hole, and before he knows it the piston has activated and two people are stuck in this bedrock box.

"Hello there," the other man says. "My name's Scar."

"Jack. It's a pleasure. I don't suppose you have any ender pearls?"

Scar considers. "No, but you can punch me to death and I can come back with some."

What? Hello??? Is this man not worried about canon death??? Jack expresses this to the man in vulgar detail, and though the man winces at the language he seems otherwise unperturbed. With a sigh, Jack acquiesces and punches the man to death. Scar apparently had full saturation when he fell into the hole, so it takes quite a while.

Scar explodes into a shower of items and Jack can't help but feel a little bad for killing him, even if it's what he wanted... Until he sees one of the man's items. A trap door. Quickly, he uses it to escape, scooping up all of Scar's items and climbing a tower of scaffolding to the surface. Up top, he's greeted by Foolish, Tubbo, Ranboo, and a red-faced and huffing Scar who must have run the entire way back all the way from the canyon.

"Oh, how did you get out?" Scar says curiously.

"You had trapdoors on you, you dumb shit!"

"Huh. I forgot about those. Aw man, my levels!"

Jack sputters in his anger. "Wh-- Do you-- How are you not bothered by this?! What if that was a canon life?!"

Ranboo watches the conversation go back and forth like a tennis match.

A look of realization comes across Scar's face. "That's right," he says, "I forgot you Dream SMP guys have that whole thing about dying-- Xisuma fixed that."

Everyone goes dead silent. Finally, Jack utters, "...Huh?"

"Yeah, no, dying isn't permanent anymore," Scar says.

Jack, who literally crawled his way out of Hell at one point in time, knows with a sinking feeling in his soul that Scar is telling the truth. Fuck the Hermits, he thinks. What the fuck.

[ranboo5]

Techno takes I find baffling seem to be based largely on like, the predication that he sees ideals over people, but that’s not... true. That’s literally the opposite of true. That’s literally the source of the conflict with people on the server

What ppl seem to think? is that Techno’s interactions with people are informed by his anarchist ideals, when it’s the other way around. He reacts to government the way he does because he’s seen what it does to people? He’s seen it hurt him, he’s seen it hurt Phil, he’s seen it hurt Ranboo, he’s seen it hurt Tubbo, he’s seen it hurt Tommy, he’s seen it hurt Wilbur, he has evidence for it hurting Niki, and the list goes on 

People keep acting like Techno’s ideology starts with “oh nooo my ideals are hurt,” which I think comes from him flipping on L’Manberg after the Manberg-Pogtopia war, but that’s because Techno clearly came in with an anarchist ethos (and pretty traumatized already; “the only universal language is violence” alone raises a lot of red flags that are all screaming “trauma”). How his anarchist ethos develops is clearly reactive and this is obvious from even immediately after this -- he sees blowing up L’Manberg didn’t stop them from starting a government, and retreats to try to take up pacifism and establish an anarchist commune in the north. He sees this fail w/ the Butcher Army and leans harder into reciprocity, and after blowing up New L’Manberg (in perceived self-defense primarily, I would argue) he decides to directly codify aforesaid ethos and develop it. And what does he emphasize when he does so? The lack of any leadership position. The fact that no member will be used or coerced. This is directly from what he’s seen government do -- corrupt its leaders with power and the search for more until they broke like Wilbur or did awful things like Tubbo, and use people like him as weapons, coerce them to take action against others against their will like they did w/ Ranboo and tried to do to Techno. Technoblade’s anarchism is clearly a reaction to his interactions with other people, not the other way around 

I think another source for the “Technoblade values ideals over people” misread is the fact that he actually doesn’t value ideals and things that much, which he states, but because a lot of the fandom identifies and sympathizes with characters who do value those ideals, that disregard comes off as personal. Take L’Manberg, or the discs -- those are things that are, for better or for worse (I would argue in most cases for worse, but ofc there is nuance and that’s a different discussion anyway), incredibly sentimentally important ideals to characters like Tubbo and especially Tommy “attachments are actually the thematic core of my character” Innit, which a lot of people sympathize with. Those things aren’t people, but because of the value that characters place on them, they feel to those characters like an attack on them is an attack on an intrinsic part of their identity. This isn’t a paradigm that Techno operates on -- the closest he comes is when they form a government in front of him and he joins in the destruction of L’Manberg, but even then it’s a more consistent read that he did it in some misguided attempt to warn them. It all comes back to Technoblade caring about people, even people who’ve wronged him and whom he disagrees with -- I’d go so far as to call that a primary motivator. The problem arises when those people work on a paradigm where they care deeply about ideals that often harm them, and Techno doesn’t have the emotional finesse nor the understanding necessary to take that into account with his “warnings,” which often only end up causing more trauma in effect. That doesn’t mean he does things because he “doesn’t care” or has a “victim complex”; it just means that he doesn’t understand the sentimental and emotional importance that that kind of attachment to an inanimate ideal has. He sees people do terrible things in the name of some strange idea of a country -- how can a country be more emotionally important to them than the person being hurt? -- and when he reacts in the way he knows how -- which, because of the other trauma he clearly already has, is violence -- he doesn’t take into account the real emotional effect that losing that country has on someone, and because the emotional effect of an attachment like that is in fact really huge, especially if you, like some characters, define yourself by that attachment, those characters and people who sympathize with them can feel like it’s an attack on something that makes them human (and that leads directly into “oh Techno is inhuman!” stuff which is. Incredibly ableist because it’s literally calling someone inhuman because they interact with ideals differently and usually also ties into calling him “emotionless” for. How. The creator. Who has ADHD. Naturally emotes.) 

If we want more nails in the coffin, just. Look at how he interacts with Tubbo? There’s a repeated sub-sentiment of the stuff I’ve talked about here that Technoblade only sees Tubbo as a government stand in and fails to see the person, but how Techno talks about/to him says the actual opposite most of the time. He’s gone on record saying that Tubbo is possibly a good guy but has been corrupted by his position during the RaccoonInnit arc, the one time he took a canon life from Tubbo was under coercion, and just today in the Snowchester stream as soon as Tubbo made it clear that, despite his big scary words and nukes, Snowchester was not intending to or probably capable of oppressing its citizens, Technoblade and the Syndicate decided that Tubbo wasn’t going to be a problem and never acted personally slighted, even though 2/4 (arguably 3/4 but no one’s ready for that conversation) of them arguably had reason to committing what Tubbo’s administration actively did to them. Technoblade doesn’t have a problem with Tubbo, the person; he has a problem with the position of a presidential cabinet, which he almost certainly sees (correctly) as something that was in fact harming Tubbo the person (Phil has even said as much explicitly, I’m pretty sure Techno has as well though perhaps in less direct terms, and Ranboo almost certainly has alluded to similar). Honestly all things considered Techno and co. are all being incredibly forgiving toward Tubbo (as they largely should be!!! Honestly I think their takes irt that are mostly correct considering Tubbo’s situation but I am also very very soft and will lie down and apologize about anything so) 

Tl;dr: People saying that Technoblade values ideals over people actually have it entirely backwards, because - Techno’s ideals are actively reactive to his interactions with other people rather than the other way around - largely the issue is that Techno doesn’t recognize the value people place on ideals  - Techno has seen the damage that those ideals + holding them has done to people which is in fact his main motivator  - Techno’s interactions w/ Tubbo all point to Techno not having a problem with Tubbo the person but rather with the government position he occupied, which hurt Tubbo the person too  - have we been watching the same streams

[7ven-devils]

A really long overanlysis of minecraft servers.

This will be my only warning, this shit is really long.

I promised this to @ivi-prism 2 weeks ago (hi, i am Svetla) but university said no and then i feel my notes were incomplete so i have to do more research.

So let's talk about anarchism and capitalism. As a future political scientist, really bugs me how the fandom and some content creators (im looking at you techno) misinterpret both theories.

Yeah this will be a overanalysis about the political, social and economic system of two minecraft servers. Why? Cause i like analysis things like this and finally i can solved what is the system of hermitcraft and thats make me happy.

Things to consider:

First im not native english speaker and im lazy so im not often write or talk in english so my typos can make Doc really proud.

Second i don't watch Dsmp i only know things about the server by the animatics, the constant information wich pop up here on tumblr, the crossover fanfics and the tiny vods that youtube insist play when i have activate automatic reproduction.

Third i tried to simplified this much as i can because this analysis i maded talking with my friends (also political scientists) and a former professor, so it got quite technical while i was writing it.

And finally don't take this seriously, I'm not trying to insult anyone, I only started this because the hermitfandom started saying that hermitcraft was capitalist and then everyone started comparing the Dsmp with hermitcraft saying anarchism vs capitalism, that's why the dsmp entered into this analysis.

Guys, seriously chaos isn't anarchism and "sucefully economic" isn't capitalism, even paid with "money" (diamonds in this case) isnt necessary capitalism.

First, mini glossary:

I understand a server like a Society/State (country) with Mr Weber definition. In really vague words a State is anyone that has a territory and has legal control of violence (the laws, no the abuse of authority).

I understand the private property as the hermits bases and/or shops (i suppose only base in dsmp? Idk)

I understand the mass production as the farms and resources.

Capitalism is a economic, politic and social theory, wich it considers private property essential and tends to monopolize the resources 'cause this it also considered private property.

Anarchy means "without government" it has its origin in the Ancient Greece. And Anarchism theory is just a society free from any political authority, but respecting the liberties of the others.

A Failed State is which one lose control of the legal violence, and can't provide the peace, essential human rights and the basics for a normal lifestyle to its people.

I think thats all the bored shit (i hope so). Now the interesting shit.

Why hermitcraft isnt capitalist?

Short answer, their idea of private property is not the same as capitalism has.

Long answer, even if they have their own stuff, they had a really strong sense of community and dont really care if someone take things from them.

We can see this in the beginning of season when Iskall take some mini blocks from Etho and he didn't really care (yeah, iskall "paid" him, but later i will explain this) or the multiple times Grian "borrow" things from Iskall and Mumbo in season 6 or Scar in season 7, the team ZIT constantly take things from each other and i can go on and on with examples, but the point here is this couldn't happen if they had a capitalist society because this would break the "private" part of private property and mass production.

Basically their friendship made so strong their sense of community that they are basically inmune to capitalism, Uncle Marx would be proud of them (not really, but would be funny). So they are communist? Nope, communist don't believe in private property and the hermits does.

But you just said-? I said they dont has the SAME idea of private property as capitalism does. They still have their bases, farms and shops, but for them their private property isnt sacred like in a capitalism system would be.

They're respect each other things because they appreciated the effort and values the time the person puts on their buildings and not only because doesn't belongs to them (and obviously cause theyre frends, but shush, this is a overanalysis, the obvious things doesn't have place here) i mean even for the shenanigans they are really polite and try to cause the least damage possible not because is not of them but because they valued the person.

Basically the famous honor code of hermitcraft.

What about the economic system and the shopping district?

Lets talk about the elephant in the room.

If Hermitcraft isnt a capitalist system, why they have a economic system based in diamonds?

Well, despite the exchange based in money for resources or services is a principal characteristic of capitalism, it isnt exclusive of that theory.

The money is a social consensus, cause barter has becomes obsolete and gold isnt cheap or infinite to use as payment. And basically, this is why we use money on this days (if you want to know the history of money ask to your trusted historian or Wikipedia).

What does this remind us? Yep, diamonds and iou's are a consensus too. When the 1.16 came out some hermits tried to change to netherite as payment and didn't suit, so they ignored it and continued with their current payment system.

And as much as Mr Smith likes to say that this is how the free market (and his stupid invisible hand) works, capitalism needs the monopoly of resources and people who works to pay for those resources.

But in Hermitcraft nobody really controlled the resources, anyone can go and collect their materials or made a farm. They just decided don't do it and go and buy it, because they save the time to go and collect for themselves, in other words they paid for the time.

Various hermits say they saved so much time go and buy the materials instead to collect themself or trade with the villagers (cause theyre the worst and all of us know it) thats why the barge and lookie lookie at my bookie are so profitable.

The shopping district it wasn't a thing before season 4, i dont really sure how it worked before, because i started watch in season six and sadly i have a boring adult life to saw the old seasons, but i assume it works in the same way that the trades the hermits does between them to accord a discount or a collab, and speak directly with the interested hermit or directly take it and pays what's considered it was fair, like iskall did with etho.

Like i said all what's happen in hermitcraft is a consensus, even the shopping district.

So yeah, that isnt a thing that would happen in a capitalism system, probably you would be dead, because "how are you dare to entered to my property", or in the jail, "because thats not yours".

So, what is hermitcraft?

For the surprise from much of you, Hermitcraft has an anarchist system.

What?! But their server is so peaceful, they don't steal from each other, they doesn't griefing, hows that possible?!

Well, the anarchism isn't really a violent political theory, at least in its beginning, actually anarchism is one of the most peaceful theories i studied, thats why i dont really thing it will worked in our society, but work in a server of 24 friends. Its too idealist.

I don't really study all of the thoughts corrents of anarchism because they are a lot. But the one we are interested is one of original thought corrent, The Mutualism, this in contrast with their cousin Communism doesn't believes the private property was something bad and considered like one of the rights from the individual, but different as capitalism because like i said before it wasn't sacred and communal things will exist to help others to start or recover.

Proudhon, one of it intellectuals, considered not paid for the work of the other it was a form to violate their liberties and feel horrofied with Marx when he said we have to abolish the private property.

The mutualists believes that each person should possess a means of production, either individually or collectively, and the products obtained would be trade in the market for the amount equivalent of their work.

This sound familiar, isnt it? Hermitcraft works in this way.

The thing with anarchism is they don't believes in a government over the people. And the hermits doesn't have one, yeah there's Scar being the mayor, but he isnt have a power over the rest and only is in charge of the "cowmercial district" even aquatown isn't part of his jurisdiction, his function is more of organization, like when we put a friend in charge to organizing part of a roadtrip.

It's the same with Xisuma figure, we all put him in a position of the admin of hermitcraft, but the truth is he isnt the only one with admin commands (but apparently some or all of them losed their admin status, at least in one of the last tango's streams, he hasnt it anymore) and various hermits said that he is more like an ambassador of them in the legal things of the server.

The hermits take all of they decisions in group and in the majority of things all of them needs to be agreed with the decision or they simple doesn't do it. And this is a characteristic of the mutualism because for them anyone are over the other.

And if you aren't already bored at this point and you put attention to what i wrote of the concept of private property in the mutualism, you would see it is practically the way hermitcraft works. They make their bases and farms, recolect resources and sell what they don't will use, buy mostly to save time and paid for the price what they considered fair. Yeah i know sometimes they do some farm specifically for one shop, but this is more "yeah, this is my thing" (Tango and Iron; Ren and wood) or a division of activities "if you do that, i do this".

The perfect utopia.

What about the Dsmp?

If you do it to here, congratulations.

So what about the Dsmp, i entered here because i want to read of them and the only thing i read was about hermitcraft.

Well, the Dsmp only entered in the equation because much of you said they were an anarchist server, but i see it more like a "failed state" and when i was talked with an exprofessor he agreed with me.

I know the term of failed state is controversial and is almost obsolete, but is the best way to describe the server and stop said it is anarchist.

So why failed state and not an anarchist state? Because they have a government (or apparently multiples) a failed one, but is there, if it were an anarchist server wouldn't have one.

Usually the failed states are known for being violent and volatile places in which ones their governments can't provides the basics to their people to live, normally are places with ethnics conflicts, civil wars, authoritarian governments or states in wars. The most common examples are Haití, Somalia or Syria.

And i am sure you can see the similarities with the Dsmp, so yeah, theyre chaotic but not anarchist.

The wars ruined the stability from the server, have a multiple sides and a megalomaniac for admin, but the goverment still there and they are fighting for the power wich wouldn't happen if the server were anarchist because anarchism don't believe the power should be possess for someone.

The server simply is failed state wich struggles under a violent fight for power.

--------------------------------------------------

If you read this far, you're a hero and had my gratitude for read my useless thoughts. Maybe some day i do it other overanalysis of this servers. I hope you enjoyed and dont confused so much.

Thanks for read.

And if there are some angry economist with me for "misrepresent" the capitalist i am completely open to a debate, my only condition is it would be in chilean spanish ;)

[give-grian-rights]

Bets Against The Void Ch4

I DID AS I SAID I WOULD.

@petrichormeraki

Chapter 1

The Chapter Before

The Next Chapter

Crossposted on AO3

Full fic bellow! content warning for trauma, relating to  the Festival.

By the time they had managed to leave Looky Looky at My Cookie, being around the two teens felt like a hurricane. When Stress managed to convince the two to get something to eat- not that cookies and cake were exactly a healthy breakfast- that certainly hadn’t slowed them down from bouncing off the walls.

Though wary at first, Tommy couldn’t get himself to turn down free goods, without even being accused of stealing. While Grian had been digging through an enderchest, finding payment for the goods, Tommy and pulled Tubbo along to gawk at the builds.

“I don’t fucking get it! Why don’t you guys just, steal shit? I don’t see anyone here to stop that! Or- what’s stopping someone from griefing?” Tommy turned, eyes narrowed on the short brunette woman.

Stress merely tilted her head, brows knitted together in confusion. “We’re a whitelist server, Love! Of course none of us would steal. We’re on a mooshroom island, so we don’t have any worries about any creepers or the like, either.” She had explained, much to the boy’s frustration.

“Yeah, but if someone wanted to, they could just fuckin’ come here and steal! I mean, why would anyone care? Or how would you even notice, you all seem loaded.” He scoffed in frustration.

Tubbo, at his side, laughed. “That’s the coolest part, Tommy! They don’t worry about that! That’s why, like, they’re so cool! No one disrupts eachother or steals, so people can just..Work, and do crazy shit!” They gawked, clapping their hands as they bounced in place.

“I’ve always meant to go back and explore one of the replica worlds you guys put out. The fact that after you’re all finished, you just- put out the code? So others can make replicas of just- such intimate places? And experience it and walk through it? That’s so cool.” Tubbo finally stopped, having nearly ran out of breath.

That earned a flustered laugh out of Stress, nodding along. “Oh, I agree. I only got to join the Hermits two worlds back, on Hermitcraft Five! Me and Zedaph- oh, is he a something- were the new Hermits up until Grian finally joined us, last world.” 

“New Hermit is definitely a heavy torch to carry,” Grian would chirp in, emerging from the shop. “Gotta commit as much chaos as physically possible. Make a good name for yourself.” The brit finished with a wolfish grin, unruly bangs falling past grey, almost purple eyes that glanced between the teens.

“He’s got a point,” Stress snorted, nodding. “If you’re ever bored during your stay, no Hermit are short on stories. Anywho, Grian, you got the spending diamonds for the two?” She turned towards the man- not even a hair taller than herself.

“Yep, of course. Here you two go, I don’t have all my diamonds on me, but this should help cover just about whatever you need.” Pulling out the diamond icon from his tablet, he dropped a numbered amount to both, being deposited into their system. “W- what!” Tubbo exclaimed, pulling out a diamond from their system. “Surely not. Is my tablet reading this right? A stack of diamonds?” They gawked, clutching onto the jewel.

Tommy merely screeched, pressing his tablet against his chest. “Holy fucking SHIT-”

“Jeez does this feel like a language moment-” another voice chimed.

The boy went rigid. Tommy’s head snapping in the direction, as Tubbo nearly jumped out of their skin in surprise. Stood by an igloo- out of place in the clashing mycelium-grass island- was an equally odd man.

Platinum white hair held back(mostly) by a well-worn black headband, a silver plate on the front reading off NHO. A faded, dull green- littered with patches, pins, and buttons- and most unnerving, a black mask covering most of their face. And- most notably- was the pair of slick, glistening snowy owl wings sprawled behind them.

The white-haired figure paused, shifting their weight awkwardly. “Uh, hi.” The guy gave a small wave, expression unreadable past mismatched black-and-red eyes. The man’s hair barely even allowed for those to be viewable- aiding in his masquerade, made the combination of mask-and-bangs shield most of the visible emotion from the newcomers.

“Hey, Etho!” Grian chirped, pleasantly pleased by the appearance of the shady figure. For some reason that Tommy, yet again, doesn’t quite understand, Tubbo gasps.

“Holy- you’re Etho? Like, Ethos Lab?  Oh, oh Void, I spent so much time watching so many of your old redstone videos! It’s what got me so interested in it!” They grinned. 

Oh Prime, who doesn’t this place have? Tommy scoffed at the thought, eyes narrowing on the figure. What’s with the scary mask people always being the ones getting popular, and shit- 

“Oh, thanks. Always happy to hear, there’s always a use for more redstone users. Uh, looks like you got a bit of a tour going on?” The man- Etho, turned towards Grian and Stress. 

“Yep! We wanted to check in on them, I know you heard from the announcement the run down.” Stress grinned, glancing towards the teens. “These two are Tommy and Tubbo. Glad to see you have some idea about Etho, already. He’s always bound to be around somewhere.” 

Tommy scoffed, eyeing the man, a few inches shy of his own height. “Hi, and shit.” He sniffed, crossing his arms.

Etho shuffled in place, nodding. “Uh, yeah. Language, by the way.” He sheepishly huffed, running a hand through his hair. “Welcome, for however long you guys stay. ..And if I may recommend, make sure you head down to Shade-E E’s. Quick profits all around.” He added, pointing with his thumb behind him, towards the dark mansion.

The blond kid raised a brow, tilting his head.  Prime, what is up with this guy.  “Excuse me?” Tommy scoffed.

Grian groaned, rolling his eyes. “Etho. Please. The amount of glass i’ve picked up coming out of the District portal.” He glared pointedly towards the man.

“Mhmm..I don’t see what there is to be so upset over. I think I'm providing a very generous service, to our server.” He snickered, quirking an eyebrow.

Pointedly sending a scolding glare towards Etho, Stress turned towards the two teens. “C’mon, now. Mind that Mr. Ice Queen, now.” She huffed, fondness seeping into her voice.

“I know when I’m unwanted,” Etho chuckled, holding up gloved hands in mock-defense. See you two ‘round. You too, Tubbo, Tommy.” He’d nod towards each person as he named them, before a rocket was summoned to his hand. And, he was off with a trail of smoke.

At the poof and small bang from the minor explosive was all it took for an incident to form. Tubbo cringed, visibly flinching before they curled in on themself, ducking their head down as their arms clung around their head, their ears covered.

Tommy, on the otherhand, nearly jumped a foot in the air before throwing himself on Tubbo.  The two went tumbling to the ground with a huff. 

The two Hermits shot up, turning towards the teens. “Oh Gord, hey, it’s okay, those were just flight duration rockets! They can’t do a thing. Etho’s gone, now.” Grian dropped down next to them, brows pinched in concern. 

“We promise, it’s alright! We all use rockets like that. It’s alright, see? Everything’s fine. No hermit would do a thing to purposefully scare you, like that.” Stress chirped in, her heart sinking at the thought of two kids being so terrified at a simple firework.

Tommy pulled his head away from the crook of Tubbo’s neck, glaring harshly at the adults. Distrust was obvious in his blue eyes, before he untangled himself, pulling up Tubbo with him. “Why the fuck would he need fireworks? He had fucking wings.”

The Hermits exchanged a gaze for a moment, before Grian held up his hands pacifyingly. “That was just an elytra. They take the form most fitting for the wearer, at the moment. Stress marked him the Ice Queen of the season, since he owns that Ice shop,” He’d point with his thumb behind him, at a snowy igloo with an Ice sign above it. “So, he had snow-themed wings. Last world, my Elytra wings were small and white feathers. Rockets boost them, since Elytras can only glide.” Grian explained patiently.

“..Right. Sorry- I- Uh. I didn’t realize he had an Elytra.. S-Should’ve expected the rocket, if I knew.” Tubbo sheepishly laughed it off, their head dipped down.

The correlation between the splattered, sparked burn scars scattered across their face, and their reaction, wasn’t lost on the Hermits. 

There was a brief silence between the four, the blond boy’s arm wrapped tightly around the other teen’s.

“So- what are your wings, now?” Tubbo eventually asked, breaking the tense pause.

Grian made a noise of understanding. “Ah, yeah, I have parrots wings, now! Scarlet Macaw. Red’s the primary color. They’re a good bit bigger than last season’s elytra, since that one was chicken based.”

“Chicken based?” Tommy scoffed, cocking an eyebrow as he eyed the short, young-looking man.

“Yes, that was his whole thing. The Hermits still tease him for it. Mine are floral-based and skeletal, when I wear them.” Stress chirped, her tone warm. With a swipe of her holographic tablet, wings were equipped to her back. 

Indeed, they were as described. A frame of skeletal bones, a light, magenta glistening aura surrounding them. Moss, and large flowers clung to the wings. How exactly she flew with them was beyond anything Tommy knew- or was willing to take the time to understand.

“We won’t be using them, since- you two don’t have any. But it is about time we discuss what your plans are. Has your server’s admin sent any updates?” Grian switched subjects, glancing between the teens.

A tense energy still surrounded them, as Tubbo fidgetted and gripped onto the fabric at the bottom of their shirt.

“No,” Tommy scoffed, pulling his Communicator into his free hand. “The bastard hasn’t said a word.” The boy practically growled out the words, in frustration. 

“Alright,” Grian said easily. “Then we figure out what you two want to do.”

“There’s a lot of spare builds. Keralis, real close to here, has a whole big city. There’s a hotel there. It’s not empty, but it is.. Overwhelming, and a bit much. There are also Hermits starter bases.” Stress explained, trying to lay out the options for the two.

Tommy scowled, while Tubbo looked- well, spaced. Easily the quietest either Hermit had seen them, so far. This only added to their concern.

“I have my starter base. No Hermit would bother you, but it’s close enough that we can drop off supplies, and you’d be able to reach others if you need help. Both of you could have anything I left in those chests, Gord knows I have more than enough resources.” Grian offered, glancing between the teens.

“The spawn room was fine, Mr. Grian.” Tubbo cringed, tilting their head towards the builder.

Grian persisted, gently shaking his head. “No, it isn’t. There isn’t the supplies to really just- let you guys sustain, there.” He grimaced, before manifesting the spruce boat icon into his hand. “Hobbit hole with everything in it going to you two, or empty hotel room with no elevator.” He’d offer.

The pair were quiet for a moment, before Tommy groaned. “Fine. Hermithole, or whatever.” 

Nodding along, Grian trailed off towards shore. “Alright, we have a short journey ahead of us, then. And then you two can decide if you want to settle there and make do with what’s stored, or come back on your own accord for more. I won’t make either of you stick around for much longer.”

“Good.” Tommy grumbled, pulling back out his own boat.

Both groups were soon in their boats, and once more, were off into the ocean.

[theres-an-impulstor-among-us]

Team ZITS mischief? >:D

Team ZIT mischief! AKA: what might have happened if Impulse and Xisuma weren’t so quick to solve their dispute over the height of Xisuma’s building.

(note: it was agreed via DM that the prompt has been changed to team ZIT instead of the full team ZITS)

Hope you enjoy! I had a lot of fun writing this ngl

Writing requests still open! Please read pinned post for details.

...

  “This is a bad idea,” groans Impulse, clutching his sword as tight as he can. “Ooohhh, this is a REALLY bad idea.”

  “Stop saying that,” Tango says from his spot atop a nearby tree. “You’ll be totally fine. I have total faith in your ability to be an acceptable decoy.”

  “Acceptable?!” Impulse rolls his eyes. “All I gotta do is not die and I’m not even above “acceptable”? What’s a guy gotta do to graduate to “good”?”

  “Let’s see you not die first, Bait Boy,” Tango teases. “Zed, you in position?”

  Zedaph’s voice comes over their communication channel. “I am currently perched at the very top of Impulse’s tower in Aqua Town, nametags in hand. Dunno if this is where I’m supposed to be.”

  “Yeah, that’s fine,”Tango snickers. “Just keep a lookout and be ready.” 

  “Eight ninety-two, good buddy.”

  Tango frowns confusedly. “Uh… what?” 

  Despite his nerves, Impulse can’t help laughing. “Do you mean ten-four, Zed?” 

  “Probably? I dunno radio codes, dude; I’m just making up numbers.”

  “Focus, guys,” Tango says tiredly, rubbing his bleary eyes. “It took us all night to find these stupid things so let’s not blow it now that we’re close to the end, alright? Anyway, Impulse, are you ready?”

  Impulse takes a deep breath in and out. “Ready.”

  Tango shoots an arrow at the pressure plate, activating the door. The ravager inside the makeshift trap immediately spots Impulse just a few blocks away and charges towards him. He backs up a few steps, before hopping onto the block above the minecart. “Goooood boy. Goooood ravager. Get in the minecart.”

  Unfortunately, the ravager does not get in the minecart. Instead, it lunges upwards, attacking Impulse with its horns.

  Impulse screams as he’s catapulted off the two-block-high pillar. He scrambles to his feet and takes off running, pursued by the ravager. 

  Tango winces as he watches them go. “Uh oh! Stuff’s gone wrong.”

  “What’s gone wrong?” asks Zedaph’s voice in his ear.

  “Ravager did not want to go for a nice minecart ride. Oh, and Impulse… Don’t look now but I think you’ve got more on your tail.”

  Impulse looks. 

  Tango suspects that his best friend’s subsequent scream at finding out he now has three angry ravagers pursuing him can be heard all the way in Aqua Town. 

  “WHY DID I THINK IT WAS A GOOD IDEA TO PUT MY ELYTRA AWAY?!” Impulse shrieks. 

  Tango takes off using his own wings. He soars over Impulse and the ravagers, looking desperately for a way to save his friend. 

  Back in Aquatown, Zedaph glides over from the top of Impulse’s tower to the window ledge of Xisuma’s half-finished building, his eyes fixed on the place in the distance where his friends should soon appear.

  “What’s going on?”

  Zedaph involuntarily leaps to the side with fright, causing him to topple off his perch and tumble to the ground. Thankfully, he lands on the grassy verge, so his landing is softer than it could have been. He quickly grabs his dropped nametags.

  Xisuma jumps down and lands neatly next to him. Even though the thick visor, Zedaph can see a raised eyebrow. “Why are there rails going into my new shop?”

  “Um…” Zedaph pauses, giving himself as much time as he dares to think. “That’s a good question. We’re… um…”

  “We?” repeats Xisuma. “Who else is here?”

  Zedaph blinks, his mind racing to come up with something on the fly. “Um… G-Grian…? And… And… Etho?”

  “Good job, bud,” comes Tango’s sardonic voice in his ear. “You’re killin’ it.”

  Zedaph can tell from Xisuma’s expression that his friend isn’t buying his obvious lie. “Mmhmm. This wouldn’t have anything to do with my dispute with Impulse over the height of my building, would it?”

  “What building?” asks Zedaph innocently.

  Xisuma takes a step to the side. “The building you just fell off.”

  “Oh.” Zedaph gapes at his friend in a panic, unable to think of a reply. “Um…”

  “Gah, my elytra broke!” Tango yelps at that moment. “This cannot get any worse!”

  “IT’S WORSE!” shrieks Impulse’s voice, not over the communication line but real, in the distance. “IT’S WORSE IT’S WORSE IT’S WORSE!”

  Xisuma spins round to find Impulse rushing towards him, followed by three angry ravagers. He lets out a screech and goes to activate his elytra but it’s already too late. 

  Zedaph manages to nametag one of the ravagers before scrambling out of the way as the three beasts bear down on Xisuma, who is cowering in the doorway of his shop. Scrambling into the BOVE offices, Zedaph runs right into Impulse, knocking both of them down. 

  Seconds later, Tango appears and manages to slam the door shut before his foot catches on Impulse’s leg and he ends up joining the two in a heap on the floor. 

  The three lie on the ground in silence for a few minutes, gasping for breath and listening to the terrifying ravager sounds outside. 

  After a long time, a message flashes up on their communicators. 

  Xisuma was slain by You’ve Been Bove’d!

  Impulse and Tango very slowly crane their necks to look at Zedaph, who is staring straight up at the sky with wide eyes, pretending not to notice his friends’ gazes. 

  Finally, the two simultaneously burst out laughing, and after only a moment, Zedaph joins in. 

  “I feel like I had an explanation for that name but now I don’t remember what it was,” Zedaph gasps out through his laughter. “It doesn’t even make any sense!”

  Impulse reaches over to pat his friends on the shoulder. “It’s very Zedaph. Oh, boy… Well, that did not go according to plan.”

  “It really did not,” Tango exhales. “But we kinda achieved our goal in the end anyway.”

  “Xisuma’s gonna kill us, right?” asks Impulse.

  Tango snorts. “Oh, absolutely. But I don’t have the energy to run anymore so I’m just gonna lie here, maybe take a nap, and hope he has mercy on me.” 

  “Oh, a nap sounds pretty nice right now, not gonna lie.” Yawning, Impulse tilts his head to rest on Tango’s shoulder and closes his eyes. “I’m so tired…”

  Zedaph laughs quietly and leans his own head on Impulse’s shoulder. His eyelids are so heavy that he can hardly stay awake anymore…

  And that is how, fifteen minutes later, Xisuma finds them when he finally manages to dispatch the last of the ravagers. He goes to push open the door but spots the three sleeping in a pile on the floor through the window, and he lets out a fond sigh, most of his annoyance already dissipating. 

  “I’ll deal with you three morons later.”

[votederpycausemufins]

Surprisingly Familiar Ch 1

The first chapter of the sequel to Summoning Family. I'm going to be working on my scattered au fic more, but you might still see some chapters of this scattered around

@petrichormeraki made the hermit!Tommy au, and @helleborusangel did amazing rambles for the chapters of Summoning Family.

Now, Let's see how things have gone since the ending of Summoning Family.

It had been eleven days since Grum’s birthday and now it was Jrum’s. He was excited by the party, playing games and trying to scam people of their diamonds. Cake was nice, his mask getting a special cake of his own with diamonds since Grum had gotten the same. And then it came to presents.

Jrum was especially happy at any toys he got and glad if he was just getting diamonds. Kokatori had also managed to get another ribbon around its neck and try to be a present again. Jrum wasn’t the most pleased about that since he was still coping with everything that happened with the egg, but he still took the present before handing them off to Grum.

Just as the presents were just about all gone, two more were placed on the table, each one with a different label. Jrum went to grab the last present when he saw the new ones being placed, so he looked up at who was putting them down, surprised to see an unfamiliar face. “Um, who are you?”

The question made everyone look over, most people looking confused, but three people had different reactions. Phil looked surprised, recognizing the man. Grian was also surprised, but also awestruck. Lastly, in Grum’s arms, Kokatori hissed.

“What the heck are you doing here? Who even let you in?” Phil asked, walking over to the man.

“I let myself in. I mean, I sort of already had permission to be here, just never used it. Building big was never really my thing.”

“Who are you then?” It was Scar who spoke up. The person looked at a few of the hermits who seemed to also look as confused as Scar sounded.

“I think the beard is messing with them.” Phil said, elbowing the man, who then ran a hand through his beard.

“Right, spend a month on an abandoned island and then get captured by pirates and you can’t really do much for that. Anyone got a raz...or…” he trailed off as Jrum pulled out some special shears. He was stunned by the bot having such a thing, but took them with a thank you and stepped out of the room.

After a few minutes, he stepped back in, and immediately some of the hermits were no longer confused. “Oh my god, it’s been so long!” Bdubs was the first to say, going over to the man. “What have you been up to!”

“Eh, mainly family. You’ve been working with someone named Scar?” Bdubs nodded and gestured to the mayor. “Got it. Nice to meet you.” He moved over to Doc. “And how about you? How’s the family life?”

“Eh, some days are always better than others, I haven’t been around here as often because of it. What about you?”

“Well, the kids are all grown up at this point, I’ve got more time on my hands so I’ve gone back to filming.”

Doc nodded. “Sounds good to me. I’ve got to tell you more about what we did last season.”

“I’m sure you do.” The man chuckled, moving over to Keralis. “Hey, can’t wait to see your city. The pictures seemed crazy enough. I can’t believe you built all that.”

“Why spank you, but I have had help with designs.”

“Yeah. And you said you own it with someone named Cleo now?”

“Yes, in fact, she’s got a relative that is in Bub’s troop last I checked.”

Cleo spoke up at this point. “Yep! Got an order in for popcorn just the other day.”

“Nice to hear. By the way, Etho’s behind me, isn’t he?” The hermits unfamiliar with the man were surprised by that comment, as Etho was indeed behind him. Pretty much no one could tell when Etho was sneaking around, so this new person doing it was very shocking. “I’ll be asking everyone about your shops so I can stay awake from them.”

“Oh come on, some of them would be fun for a survivor like you. In fact we could get Tango to open up decked out for a session for you.”

“Right, sure Etho. Now is Beef around?”

“No actually. He had something really important come up.” Etho answered, another hermit nodding to agree with the statement.

“Ah, that’s too bad. Well, I guess the only person left to greet is ol’ rap battle over here.”

Wels suddenly looked embarrassed. “Oh that’s why you look familiar. You’re the OBP leader.”

“Yeah.” The man nodded. “You know green wasn’t really your c-”

“Please don’t bring that up again.”

The man laughed. “Alright, I won’t.” He then looked at the rest of the hermits. “Well, I think I know a few of you from the letters I’ve gotten from these guys.” And he gestured to the hermits he had been talking to. “Like I know Scar and Cleo now, then TFC and Xisuma I’m familiar with, also Zedaph.”

“Yeah, so who are you exactly?” Mumbo spoke up. “While I’m glad you’ve come to celebrate Jrum’s birthday, I’m not familiar with you.”

“Right, forgot to give my name I guess.” The man started to say. “I’m-”

Grian cut him off. “You’re the Soarvivor Paul! I remember watching your shows when I was in highschool! I had some friends at my school in England who went to an event of yours!”

“Wait, this is Paul?” Scar spoke up. “I’ve heard a lot of stories about him from Doc and Bdubs.”

Paul smiled at that. “Yep, that would be me.”

Grian took over the conversation again. “So wait, you said you were recording again, are you making MvM again?”

Instead of answering happily like Paul had to everyone else, he just gave Grian a bit of a nod before giving him the cold shoulder.

“Wait, are you that uncle Phil’s always talking about?” Tommy asked. He had stayed out of the conversation when he had no clue what was going on, but now that he recognized the name, he had some things to say. “The one he always complains always uses letters instead of a phone call or texting.”

Paul nodded. “Yeah, that would be me. Letters are the most reliable when you’ve got a job like mine.”

“Then stick to a comm then Paul.” Doc said, resting his arm on Paul's shoulder. “I’ve offered to make you a special one who knows how many times. I’m sure your kids wouldn’t mind it either.”

“Why do I feel like I’m still missing something?” Tommy spoke up again, Doc explaining for him.

“A number of us hung out with Paul in the past. Most of us he knows from the old Minecrack worlds, but he met Keralis on some other worlds.”

“Yeah, and met Wels when we were dealing with an apocalypse world. Beef was there too.” Paul sighed. “So Phil, what’s your family been getting up to other than the obvious?”

“Well, Tommy’s actually living in hermitcraft now.” Phil answered. “Wilbur’s getting through some things, and Techno’s trying to keep up his hardened warrior mask, but Grian’s kid is making that hard.”

“Well, this group seems to have that effect on people.” Paul nodded. “And how’ve they been doing with Xelqua?” Paul jabbed a finger on Grian’s direction.

“Right, shit, forgot to say that part. Grian is Xelqua.” Phil quickly explained, Paul’s mouth turning to a small ‘o’.

“Ah, I guess that explains that war and the hippies I heard about in letters. At least It’s a little tamer in a world like this.” Most of the people in the room were confused, and at first Grian was one of them, but then he made a connection and his legs were suddenly struggling to keep him up. “He has told you about Tokyo, right?”

Before anyone could answer, Kokatori was hissing in Grum’s arms again, drawing Paul’s attention. He pulled out a stone sword and immediately the hermits that knew Paul were holding him back. “No! Hey! Paul, that is a kid’s pet!” Bdubs said. “I know you don’t like them but that’s like the one chicken you’re not allowed to kill!”

“Just get him a pet other than a chicken! You can’t trust a chicken! They’re spies, killers and thieves.”

“Killer chickens?” Wels, who wasn’t holding Paul back, asked.

“Oh no, he’s telling the truth about that.” Doc answered. “I saw it for myself.”

“How do you get killed by a fucking chicken?” Tommy asked.

“You forget to kill it first.” Paul answered, finally putting his sword away. “Well, you said that kid’s one of Xel’s.”

“One of Grian’s.” Phil corrected. “And yes. That’s Grumbot, or Grum, the older of the two. His birthday was a week and a half ago.”

“Well, figures they’d just try causing more problems.”

Phil rolled his eyes and then grabbed Paul’s arm. “Alright, you and I. Talk. Now.”

When Phil and Paul had left the room, Grian finally allowed himself to go to the floor. The hermits that knew Paul were immediately apologizing for him, not sure why he was acting that way. But Grian knew. And Mumbo helped Grian up, pretty sure he knew too. “I’m going to help Grian lie down. Grum, maybe I should take Kokatori with me so they don’t cause more problems.”

Grum nodded and handed the chicken over, it being very upset about being moved and pecking at Mumbo’s arms. But he was too worried about Grian to let that stop him. So soon they had left the room too.

For a while, everything was silent. But then Jrum spoke up. “Well, for my birthday, I want to eavesdrop! And no one can stop me!” And he ran off to listen into Phil and Paul’s conversation, leaving the rest of the party members confused on what to do.

[mugionthewater]

Tsumugi Shirogane Deepdive: Prologue

I’m in a DR mood right now, and really enjoying revisiting Tsumugi in particular, so I thought I’d do a chapter-based retrospective focusing on all the cool Tsumugi material! A reread project especially rewarding for a character like Mugi, so I’m really excited.

In this series, I’m focusing a lot on all the foreshadowing, and also what we can extrapolate about Tsumugi’s true character along the way. I’ll be doing this chapter-by chapter, including the prologue as well as an installment for her Free Time Events.

Full spoilers for V3 under the cut.

The Pre-Prologue

We first see Tsumugi in the gym by the exisals to get their uniforms and their memories. Tsumugi herself has four lines of dialogue in this scene, nothing that particularly stands out, but there are a couple of things worth noting about how she (and everyone else) is dressed.

Kaede describes how she was kidnapped on her way to school, and it sure looks like that’s the case for almost everyone in the room. We’re used to seeing DR characters in flashy outfits that vaguely resemble school uniforms but actually reflect their individuality, so when the game first shows them in an ensemble lineup like this, it’s a lot more striking.

Not so much in this CG. While there are plenty of visual details that tell us about these characters (Saihara’s already hiding under a hat in his sprites; Iruma is revealing; Kiibo and Gonta are buttoned up and orderly, but Kaito’s shirt and jacket are undone to show a bold-colored undershirt), their uniforms look like they’re doing what uniforms are supposed to do: be bland and blend in.

What about Tsumugi? Tsumugi wears a basic uniform like everyone else, but this is where we get the game’s first indication that all is not what it seems with this girl. The clue is the blue. She is the only one in the lineup whose primary color isn’t a neutral tone. What’s more, it’s the same shade of blue Tsumugi is associated with throughout the game. Visually, part of her is already in character as Tsumugi Shirogane, SHSL Cosplayer.

Of course, there’s a much bigger item foreshadowing Tsumugi as the bad guy, which is that in advance of everyone getting their “memories”, the main emphasis is their new clothes delivered by the Monokubs.

There are a couple of reasons the clothes are significant. For starters, there’s a direct line to Tsumugi’s cosplay talent. For anyone inclined to suspect her before starting the game on account of her talent (and her general don’t-look-at-me-I’m-not-suspicious vibes), this is immediate theory fodder. This also primes the audience to look at the setting of V3 with a critical eye, between the contrast of the kids’ boring outfits and their flashy new ones and the Monokubs making explicit references to starting the “story“, there is an immediate suggestion of artifice that runs all the way down to their identities. Not for nothing is Kaede’s magical girl transformation visually similar to the memory light.

Another thing: pre-memory light, the person in the room whose outfit is the least uniform-y is Amami.

At the very least, it’s a look that’s noticeably more casual than what most of the cast is wearing. After Chapter 6, we know that Amami made it to the end of the 52nd Killing Game before he and Tsumugi were condemned to execution via participating in the next killing game- which he seems to be realizing in this scene- so it’s possible they’re coming right off the heels of the last killing game. It’s an ongoing mystery what his relationship with her was like up to this point? Does he know she’s the ringleader? Is “Tsumugi Shirogane“ anything like the person she was in the last killing game, assuming she was even there?

I’m not confident Tsumugi really switched to a new persona for the 53rd Killing Game, even though fake identities is kind of her whole deal. I’ll get more into why in this series, but I think a lot of the character we see in the game is the “real“ Tsumugi, to the extent that such a person even exists.

Introducing Tsumugi Shirogane: Professional Cosplayer, Sex God

If you go back and read the promotional blurbs for V3, Tsumugi’s mention her tendency to get so lost in thought that she’ll ignore everyone around her. This little trait isn’t super weird at first, until you realize later in the game that she doesn’t carry the shtick past the first chapter. It’s like she wrote the character blurbs herself, realized everybody has a wacky “thing“ that would come up immediately in the introductions, and came up with an act of low-grade wackiness so she’d fit in in the prologue.

This is great stuff, looking back. It gives an intro in brief to the many contradictions of Tsumugi Shirogane. On one hand, it’s overly phony and performative. But on the other hand, there’s a core of truth there about her character- she really is someone who stays in her thoughts without a care for anyone around her, albeit less in the cute way and more in the horrifying sociopath kind of way.

It also tells us something important about Tsumugi’s commitment to the Killing Game. She cares about maintaining the integrity of this world and its characters, but is pretty indifferent about maintaining a role for herself. She doesn’t give a shit about having a storyline or even much of a character. The pleasure of DR comes from what she can get as an observer/consumer. 

This is entirely consistent with what she tells Kaede and Saihara about herself and her feelings about cosplay in the actual introduction.

This is the ethos that makes me wonder how dishonest Tsumugi really is. She’s dishonest as hell, of course, but given that she later applies the entire DR LARP reality show experience as “cosplay“, what she says about her convictions largely rings true. She clearly cares about making her tribute an authentic one (lol), which extends to her being the primary creative director inside her fiction bubble.

It partly explains why she spends the next five chapters being little more than furniture. In her mind, her job as a producer precludes her from being a character in her own right, because doing anything to pull focus is tantamount to self-promotion, and, well, that’s an abuse of power that gets in the way of the story!

(sidebar: there are some fascinating things we could speculate about what she says about cosplay relates to her relationship with the rest of Team Danganronpa and the outside world, but this post is getting long, so I’ll save it for another day)

Like everything else about Tsumugi, it’s not until the end that you can fully contextualize how sinister she’s being here. What she passes off as a cute passion for cosplay is actually a bone-deep sense of consumer entitlement taken to a logical extreme. Tsumugi is a more vicious indictment of terrible nerds and a selfish fandom than anything Hifumi Yamada could embody. She loves DR so much, and feels so strongly that nobody should be participating in DR with any corrupt motives, that anything less than the real deal is unacceptable. To this end, she will happily transplant entirely new emotional realities on the others so that even the emotional torture of the Killing Game is authentic. In Tsumugi’s selfish nerd brain, this is the important part of the drama of Killing Games, and anyone who disagrees with her approach is a fake fan who doesn’t deserve any kind of creative control.

Anyways, there’s more to say about Tsumugi’s introduction, so moving on

Some pretty overt foreshadowing here. In the Japanese script, her reference is ep. 53 of Kiteretsu Daihyakka instead of Doraemon. I like the change for the dub, even though it’s pretty obvious. Someone who knows DR primarily through the dub is less likely to know about the franchise’s connection to Doraemon, anyway.

Tsumugi also points out the weird dragon statue in the hallway that will lead into a new part of the school down the line. It’s a neat little metatextual trick on the audience, because it’s the kind of thing that’s not suspicious at all on a first playthrough. She’s an NPC in a DR game, of course her dialogue is gonna point out plot devices that will be relevant shortly, but on a reread you know she’s being deliberate about it. This is far from the last time this kind of thing happens with Tsumugi.

Lastly, this charming observation from Kaede about why she’s maybe not so plain afterall.

Kaede puts it in the worst way possible, but it’s interesting that she, a person with a generally good read on people, decides immediately that there’s more to Mugi than meets the eye. Not only that, she relates it specifically to an audience spending a lot of time looking at her. If she were any less gross about it, Kaede making this kind of observation would land like a big clue.

This leaves us with the biggest question from the prologue: if Kaede wasn’t too busy being horny and gay, could she have put two and two together and thwarted the ringleader?

There is SO much more to say about Tsumugi, so I’m really excited to dig deep into other chapters!

[hmshermitcraft]

Glitter Showers

Tango checked the chest in his base. Inside was a book, and much to his chagrin, free glass. Tango collected the glass and set the stack in his item sorter, then opened the book. It was unsigned, he noticed, and 30 pages. He flipped through it, finding the first twenty nine to be nonsensical gibberish. The last page had a set of coordinates. 

Tango entered the coordinates in his comm, then set off to the coordinates, uncertain of what awaited him. Without even a guess as to who sent the book, he really had no idea what he was getting himself into. Whatever it was, at least Impulse and Zedaph would be beside him, because they touched down at almost the same time he did. 

“So you guys got glass and coords too?” Impulse asked softly, checking his comm. “These are the coordinates.“

“So, what exactly is meant to be here?” Tango asked, scanning the jungle around them. 

Zed pulled both of his oblivious lovers over to the entrance of Etho’s bridge. “This, ya dum dums.” He replied. The bridge was an amalgamation of blocks sporadically tossed together. If anyone else had built it, it’d be hideous, but Etho had an eye for making mishmash look tasteful. 

It was absolutely no surprise to any of them that they missed a pressure plate in the mess of other clicky blocks.Tango barely had enough time to try to shelter the other two from… glitter?Where in the hell had Etho gotten his hands on glitter, of all things? 

The flower petals were probably pilfered from Xusima’s flower farm, as Etho had pretty much been glued to their admin’s side since Tango began building Decked Out. Anything to avoid the trio, really.  It kind of hurt, but Tango had correctly assumed their cryptid needed time to process Tango’s confession. Impulse and Zedaph thought it’d scared him off. 

Off in the distance, Etho’s laughter rang through the trees. A firework popped, then the white haired boy landed in front of them gracefully, wiping mirthful tears from his eyes. “Oh man, you guys look ridiculous,” He chuckled, looking away to catch his breath. He glanced back to them and the giggle fit started again. Tango surveyed his lovers, and yeah, they looked stupid. Well, The flowers sort of suited Zed, but Impulse just looked… annoyed, mostly, because the petals and glitter were soaked in something to make them sticky. 

Despite the absolute mess Etho made of them, each of them found it easy to laugh along with Etho, congratulating the prankster on a job well done. Then, as if struck by lightning, Etho straightened and sobered up. 

He cleared his throat. “Okay, I’m sorry. But this was a necessary part of this plan working. Xu has officially given me the boot, and told me to talk to you guys, but you all know I can’t take anything that seriously.” He began softly. “So I stole some petals from him. Sorry in advance, Xu. They went to a good cause,” Then he bit his lip, presumably to contain more giggles. 

“I’m sorry I avoided all of you and went ghost.” He began seriously, an odd demeanor for Etho to take. Tango was kinda into it, though. “So naturally, Tango dropped a major bombshell on me, and I needed some time to wrap my brain around that. Tango confessed, so Zed, Impulse, were you all actually flirting with me?” he asked. 

“I thought we were being pretty bloody obvious,” Zed joked, sheepishly scratching the back of his neck. “But yeah. We were,”

Impulse nodded. “We tried, anyways. Clearly, it didn’t land if we have to clarify.” he replied. 

Etho shook his head. “No, it didn’t. But I’m just.. trying to learn your love languages,” he explained with a casual wave of his hand. A breeze blew some petals from the ground, sticking to Etho’s wrist. Tango picked them off, sticking the stray petals to Impulse. 

“But how does all of this.” Impulse gestured to the trio of ridiculousness, “ connect to that?” he questioned. 

Etho blushed. “You see, It’s hard to feel stupid when the people you’re looking stupid in front of look worse,” He laughed. “Not that it worked. I still feel kinda dumb saying this..” Etho trailed off, looking down at the mishmash of blocks under their feet. “I really like you guys too,” he mumbled, and if Tango didn’t have sharp hearing, he’d have missed it. 

“We didn’t catch that, E,” Zed said softly, touching his shoulder. Etho looked up at him, lips pursed in an uneasy smile.Even with the mask, Tango knew. “Hey, we aren’t gonna judge you, ya know,” And there was the Zed that won him over. Soft, easy going, and always reassuring. Always caring for others. 

Etho nodded. “I said: “I really like you guys too,” he clarified, louder.

Impulse and Zedaph were stunned into silence, and Etho looked ready to bolt. Now was the chance, and Tango gently caught his wrist before the firework lit up.  “Don’t run. Give those idiots a second. They did it to me, too,” Tango smiled, aiming for reassuring, but probably failing. Etho still tensed, poised for.. Something. A hit, Tango realized, jarring him a little. 

Instead, Tango pulled the taller boy closer, locking him in a tight yet gentle hug. Etho blinked in surprise, but melted into the contact, barely jumping when Impulse joined in. He didn’t jump at all when Zed pressed close, resting his cheek on Etho’s shoulder blade. Right in the center of them, where he belonged. 

“I think this goes without saying, but the feeling is mutual,” Impulse commented softly. The quartet laughed, then Etho wiggled out of their grasp.

“Sorry. Four way hugs in the jungle are not a great idea,” he chuckled. “Especially with a half imp and a satyr, No offence,”

Zed laughed. “No worries. I just didn’t want to be the first to let go,” he confessed. “But yeah, hugging Tango and I at the same time is a slippery slope to sweating.” He admitted. 

“This is why we chose cooler climates, E,” Impulse explained. “But with our redstone brians, we can make a solution,” 

“Yeah, I’m sure we can, too,” Etho replied, looking down at himself. The glitter and petals now clung to him as well. “Well, that was a bad call, but at least we match,” he giggled, nose wrinkling as Zedaph pressed a glittery kiss to his cheek. “Stop it. Gri will never quit giving me shit for this,” he mumbled half heartedly. 

“He’s not even here?” Tango reasoned, more of a question than a statement. 

Etho smiled, saying nothing. The smile itself, even hidden behind his mask, said everything.

[fireinmywoods]

the heart of the matter (is Leonard McCoy)

Followers...friends. I come to you today, hat in hand, to ask for your support in a certain fandom matter, a trifling concern of little real consequence which nevertheless has been driving me absolutely cross-eyed bonkers for some years now.

Simply put: can we please all agree that Bones is the heart of the Enterprise???

In AOS, I mean. I’m not aware of any debate over this when it comes to TOS, where the roles of the triumvirate have always been explicit, though there are a few different ways to identify them:

Spock = logos = superego = head

Bones = pathos = id = heart

Kirk = ethos = ego = soul

So clear! So clean! So universally accepted by Trek fandom at large!

Oh, but things get murkier in AOS, and there are plenty of posts floating around which suggest that it’s Kirk, not McCoy, who serves as the heart in the Kelvin timeline. Even the writers of the first two AOS films have outright stated that their interpretation of the triumvirate had the original roles switched, with Kirk as the highly emotional one and McCoy as the arbiter between Kirk’s passion and Spock’s logic. It’s true that this technically counts as a Word of God pronouncement by the actual creators of 2/3 of the series thus far, which some would argue renders it canon. However, it’s equally true that those same creators also felt that Kirk was a fuckboi and that Benedict Cumberbatch wonderfully embodied their vision for Khan Noonien Singh, so honestly, who gives a hot hollerin’ fuck what those dingdongs think. This seems as justified a time as any to invoke Death of the Author, and in fact, it’s my firm belief that despite the writers’ intentions, Star Trek and Into Darkness both support the original triumvirate breakdown.

Under the cut you’ll find a long-winded and self-indulgent ~*~character analysis~*~ of the Kelvin-timeline incarnations of Jim Kirk and Leonard “Bones” McCoy, reviewing why Leonard is still unmistakably the heart, unpacking what the hell Jim’s deal is, and finally taking a look at some key examples from canon, because ya girl believes in showing her work.

Let’s get down to business.

[A quick warning, as this is starting to spread beyond my own followers: if you don’t like McKirk as a romantic pairing, you ain’t gonna like part IV, so I’d bow out before then or just take your leave now.]

i. Leonard

Independent of Jim’s characterization, it should be blindingly obvious that Leonard is the heart. He’s by far the most nakedly emotional of our seven core crew members, a trait we see writ large and small throughout the films. He’s reactive; he’s passionate; he’s humane. He cares, first and foremost.

Not about Starfleet, of course. Leonard doesn’t give a damn about playing the game or advancing his career, or even really about the Enterprise’s mission - he has no desire to explore strange new worlds, he’ll pass on seeking out new life and new civilizations, and he spends half his time trying to convince everyone else that boldly going where no man has gone before is a great way to die horribly. Fuck exploration, fuck space, and fuck the Federation while we’re at it. Leonard is perhaps the most improbable of the Enterprise’s senior officers for the simple reason that he seems to resent everything about the job.

Well. Almost everything.

See, what Leonard cares about is people. He cares about their lives, about their stories, about their hopes and dreams, about their suffering. That’s why he entered and has stayed in an extremely taxing caring profession, and it’s why he’s still on the Enterprise despite his incessant bitching about everything they do. He wouldn’t trust anyone else to take care of the crew he’s become so attached to, and he finds fulfillment in helping the people they encounter out there in the nightmare of space.

In every timeline, Leonard McCoy defines himself by what he can do for others: the pain he can ameliorate, the wounds he can heal, the diseases he can cure, the small amounts of good he can bring to a galaxy filled with so much absolute horseshit. Unlike most of his colleagues, he’s not motivated by curiosity or an adventurer’s spirit or a burning desire to make sense of the universe. (Fuck the universe, too, as a matter of fact.) Instead, he’s driven by the incredible depths of his compassion and empathy and concern for the people he serves alongside and those they meet along the way.

Sure sounds like the heart to me.

ii. Jim

I actually totally get why some people characterize Kelvin-timeline Jim as the heart. He’s quite literally a different man than the original timeline’s Kirk, and he definitely has more of the pathos qualities to him. Early on, he’s a total spitfire, fierce and hot-blooded, quick to anger and other sharp-edged emotions we’re not used to associating with James T. Kirk. Even as he grows into himself and leaves some of those traits behind, he remains spontaneous, passionate, protective, and self-sacrificing - easy enough to mistake for the heart if you squint.

But let’s not confuse having a heart for being the heart. Sure, Jim is more openly emotional and reactive than his TOS counterpart, but there’s still a marked difference between the way he and Leonard express and act on their emotions.

AOS Jim definitely has a lot of feelings - big ones - but at the end of the day, he’s not driven by his heart. He’s driven by his gut.

Whenever there’s trouble, Jim makes a beeline right for the center of it. He’s impulsive as hell, rarely pausing to think past his first instinct, because he just wants to be doing something, no matter the odds, no matter what it costs him. He explicitly calls himself out on this in ST:ID when arguing with Spock: “I have no idea what I’m supposed to do. I only know what I can do.” He doesn’t have the patience or the constitution to sit and debate all the options, either internally or with his crew. If there’s a path forward from where he is, even a bad one, Jim’s gonna take it.

[Sidebar: One could make the case that the roots of Jim’s instinct to act reach back to his childhood traumas - canonically ignored abuse and neglect on the one hand, and the Tarsus IV famine and massacre on the other - but that’s a whole post on its own and we ain’t got all day here.]

Jim can’t not act, and while that gets him into a lot of trouble, it also saves lives. Sulu probably appreciated that Jim’s gut drove him to leap off Nero’s drilling platform without a moment’s hesitation after a man he’d only just met. He may have been a real shithead about it, but Jim’s impassioned insistence on going after the Narada and not wasting time on the possibility of a better option was key to saving Pike and Earth itself. And I don’t know why Spock was so surprised that Jim intervened to save him on Nibiru, considering that the reason they were there in the first place was because Jim couldn’t sit back and watch the Nibirans die when there was something his crew could do to help them, even if it meant risking a violation of the Prime Directive.

Jim is a good man with a big heart, and he cares about people, absolutely. But he cares most of all about Doing The Right Thing - which in the heat of the moment often translates to Doing Something, Anything, Hold My Beer.

iii. heart vs. gut (i.e., time for some receipts)

I think one of the main reasons Leonard and Jim’s characterizations get confused is because they both tend to act on instinct, only lightly informed by higher reasoning. However, I’d argue that their motivations and the nature of those actions are super distinct, and those distinctions remain relatively consistent throughout all three films. (And y’all know I really mean this shit if I’m out here calling ST:ID consistent.)

Jim is a big picture guy, figuratively and often literally heaving himself full-body into the mix of whatever problem the crew has encountered for lack of any better alternative. That energy propels the plots of all three films: the chaotic path he carves through the events of Star Trek and ST:ID, and the slightly calmer but still undeniably bananas course he charts for himself and his crew in the second half of Beyond.

As the heart, Leonard operates on a more micro level. His concern invariably lies with the individual people caught up in those grand events Captain Chaos is busy dragging them all through. While Jim’s zooming around flipping plot switches, Leonard can always be counted on to bring it back to the personal.

We frequently see this juxtaposed right there on film. Think of that slow pan through medbay in the first movie after the Narada’s ambush and the destruction of Vulcan: while Jim is stewing over what to do about the Big Bad, Leonard has stepped into the CMO role without fuss or fanfare to care for the wounded crew and traumatized survivors.

Or jump ahead to Beyond: during Krall’s attack on the Enterprise, there’s a gorgeous cinematic shot of Jim sprinting down the corridor with two crew members to take on the invaders - and then we cut to Leonard moving slowly through those same ghastly red-lit corridors, searching for casualties in need of help, visibly affected by what his scanner is telling him about the downed crewman he tries to save.

Actually, Beyond as a whole does terrific justice to each of their roles. (Perhaps because it was not written by dingdongs.) The first act finds Jim flailing around for a sense of purpose and forward momentum - an understandable consequence of a gut-driven character having stalled out for too long - and he ultimately gets his mojo back by spending the rest of the film careening through one insane seat-of-his-pants ploy after another. Meanwhile, in the quieter moments between all the mayhem, Leonard serves as the empathetic sounding board for both Jim and Spock as they struggle with deep emotionally charged secrets and Big Life Questions, helping them untangle their feelings and reminding them of the emotional attachments which are ultimately key to their respective decisions to stay on the Enterprise.

More examples, you say? Don’t mind if I do!

Star Trek

GUT: Jim hurtles around the Narada, improvising almost every step of the way and paying the price for his and Spock’s scheme in bodily harm, and ultimately succeeds in rescuing Pike. HEART: Leonard calls out for Jim as he runs into the transporter room, overwhelmed with relief that he’s made it back, and takes Chris Pike’s weight literally and figuratively onto his own shoulders to begin healing him while Jim runs back off to the center of the action.

Star Trek: Into Darkness

GUT: Jim argues with Leonard, Spock, and Scotty in quick succession as he’s preparing to drag them all off to Qo’noS, immune to their attempts to reason with him because, unraveled as he is by grief and pain, he can only focus on his visceral drive to Do Something. HEART: Unlike the others, Leonard is upset not about the larger moral questions of whether it’s right to go after John Harrison or bring torpedoes aboard the ship, but about the fact that Jim himself is hurt and hurting and won’t accept help.

GUT: Jim makes a snap decision to sacrifice himself by hurling his body against the warp core to realign it and save his crew. HEART: Shellshocked by the emotional grenade of his best friend’s death, Leonard suddenly realizes, through the haze of his own numbness and upswelling grief, that he might still be able to do something for this lonely radiation-ravaged body he’s been brought and the life it represents.

Star Trek Beyond

GUT: At the tail end of an improvised plan to out-maneuver Kalara, Jim quite literally shoots first and asks questions later, igniting a fuel tank and setting off an explosive series of events which he and Chekov just barely escape. HEART: The next time we see Leonard, Spock is opening up to him about Ambassador Spock’s death and his own plan to leave Starfleet for New Vulcan - and while he’s empathetic toward Spock (I can’t imagine what that must feel like), Leonard’s thoughts go immediately to the emotional impact of Spock’s plan on the other people he’s closest with. (I can see how that would upset [Nyota]. / I can tell you, [Jim]’s not gonna like that.)

GUT: Jim frantically strains to reach the final switch in the life support hub, believing that he’s going to die either way since the vent has already opened, but spurred on by the knowledge that his ability to move that switch is the only thing standing between Yorktown and annihilation. HEART: Knowing exactly what’s at stake, with the fate of the station and millions of lives hanging in the balance, Leonard’s greatest concern is that Jim won’t make it out in time.

iv. never bet against the heart

Let’s wrap this up with a deep dive on one of the absolute best examples of Leonard as the heart: his decision to sneak Jim onto the Enterprise in the first movie.

As relentlessly as I drag him for the, you know, poisoning and kidnapping aspects of that whole deal, there’s no denying that it is a god-tier heart move. Is it logical? Absolutely not. Is it really the right thing to do for either himself or Jim, as far as he knows at the time? Nope. It’s 100% the wrong choice for his own job security, reputation, and relationships with his fellow crew, and it’s almost guaranteed to get Jim into even worse trouble. Leonard is a smart dude who must understand that this course of action will likely end up coming back on them both in a real bad way. For someone who argues loudly and often in defense of self-preservation, this is a shockingly bad idea.

But none of that matters, because Jim shakes his hand and tells him to be safe with that horrible empty-eyed smile, and it gets him right in the heart, one-two-three.

One: sympathy, worry, and affection for Jim - his best friend, his wild and troublesome stray, his only family.

Two: guilt over adding onto Jim’s pain, and the instinctive urge to fix whatever‘s hurting him.

Three: fear of heading out into the unknown by himself, the agonizing uncertainty of not knowing what’s coming, craving for the security and reassurance Jim’s presence would give him.

“Dammit,” Leonard says, as his heart wins out over his brain. He knows this is a garbage plan, and he doesn’t care. His heart chooses Jim. That’s all that matters.

So he goes back for Jim, and to his own surprise it turns out that this Very Bad Idea was actually a Very Good Idea because Jim’s impulsive instincts end up saving Earth, and Leonard’s not in the habit of fixing what ain’t broke so he figures he may as well keep on chasing Jim’s crazy ass around the galaxy for a while, through jungles and off cliffs and into the goddamn afterlife when need be, until finally one day Jim’s gut drives him right into Leonard’s arms and he suddenly realizes that this is what his heart was choosing all those years ago: Jim’s wide terrified eyes, Jim’s voice breaking over his name, Jim’s hand pressing hard against his chest, reaching out for what’s his.

But that’s another story.