#not because i think its bad or i dont really want to watch it. just to clarify
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OMGGG UR RECENT POST WAS WRITTEN PERFECTLY. I am an asexual lesbian and I love byler for many reasons. 1. Because I think WIll is one of the most accurate representations of what it is like to be gay EVER written. Will is so relatable. As a lesbian I have unfortunately fallen for MANY of my friends. There was one notable time where a girl I was really close with accused me of liking her (i did oops) and it became a huge thing. She was disgusted and told anyone she could and it was the worst feeling. So when I see a character in the same situation I am obv gonna want them to have what I didnt. 2. Because Will’s character alone is so tragic and I want him to have a happy ending. I also really like angst and watching sad things. I love crying and movie and tv shows. Every single one of Will’s scenes have gotten me. 3. Because SO many people are SOOOO hateful online. The straight up homophobia over a queer ship is UNBELIEVABLE. I need this people to be wrong SO bad. I want to see them mad I want to see them metaphorically slapped in the face that times ARE changing and that they are the problem. I also think it is the suspense that has been built. I def would love it still and ship it, but if there wasnt so much suspense built I dont think it would be as big. I hate how people always try to claim its sexualizing because not a single thing on here its sexualizing them. Literally everyone just wants a kiss and the rest is all wholesome so I dont see how it is sexualizing in any way. LGBTQ representation is for everyone in the community. I do not really get why people try to claim it is not. I will never understand why people within the community try to pick fights with each other instead of attacking the actual issue (homophobia) it is not productive in any way and we should all be standing with each other in growing representation for the community as a whole. Sorry this is so long I just thought u might appreciate someone agreeing with you because u are totally right.
EXACTLYYYY!
I’m just so over seeing this “tragic homosexual” pattern in every single piece of lgbtq media (reddie, cmbyn you get what i mean) because as much as it is realistic it’s just so depressing to see it over and over again when it’s already terrible enough to deal with in real life. And as you said, Will has already been through so much, adding unreciprocated love for his best friend on top of everything would be the final nail in the coffin and only prove that he in fact was right about never finding love. That would be so cruel!!!
It’s also so obvious that if Will was a girl nobody would call bylers delusional and just straight up throw hate and shade at them. It’s clear it all stems from homophobia and the GA’s heteronormative point of view, which is really sad but that’s unfortunately the society we live in
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one of my favorite (/sarcastic but not really cuz its like funny idk) things in fandoms is when people make ocs or self inserts or 'x readers' being shipped with characters, but the oc/sona/reader is literally just another character from the source material.. its like youre shipping the characters but didnt want to admit it, so you made a kinsona and branded it as something else..
and its NEVER subtle, actually its super blatant every time and im always shocked when nobody points it out..
i have seen uncountable saiki k x readers where the description is like:
"saiki meets someone whose thoughts he cant read for the first time, and even though he doesnt trust her at first, she keeps proving that she is kind and has good intentions!" you mean nendo? reader is girl nendo?
"this time, he meets a girl whose thoughts honestly match up with her spoken words almost perfectly for the first time!" hairo. youre shipping saiki with girl hairo.
"saiki meets someone whose thoughts are too fast and jumbled to re-" ITS AKECHI, THATS AKECHI, ITS LITERALLY AKECHI.
"saiki meets someone whose just as immune to teruhashi as he is for the first and only tim-" this is hairo again, awe bae you secretly LOVE haisai ?!?
"saiki sees his old childhood friend for the first time in years after an incident caused them to be apart and then they fall in lov-" WHY DID YOU EVEN WRITE THIS AND NOT CALL IT SAIKECHI.
its even funnier when they say its like that characters little sister, but the way they write it is still literally just the character, like their personality, dialogue, even their relationship, is the same..
not all of them fit this exactly, but the ones that take a boy character and turn them into a girl oc to ship them with a boy, it reminds of how in equestria girls they couldnt make applejack and rarity endgame so they gave them boyfriends who looked IDENTICAL to each other.. thats what youre creating, guys, youre creating heterosexual rarijack.
#these r all very specific examples because ive seen all of them#MAKE UR KINSONAS SHAMELESSLY IF UR GONNA DO THIS BRO OMG#STOP PRETENDING ITS LIKE AN ORIGINAL CHARACTER IF UR JUST GONNA COPY IT ALL#i love kinsonas i would love to see actual kinsonas even if u structure them as 'x oc/reader'#none of these words are in the bible#say this to any not chronically online person and watch them short circuit#saiki k x reader fics are almost always like 'and then y/n SHATTERS TERUHASHIS EGO AND HUMBLES HER SO GOOD' ur sick in the head#x readers where they want to be the only person he likes and hes an asshole to everyone else also suck but-#people thinking he genuinely hates his friends is a phenomenon not exclusive to x readers lol its just far too common#sorry that was a side note#theyre not all bad#i dont even think the ones im talking about in the post are really bad- its just kinda dumb and silly#do what u want queens#saiki k#tdlosk#the disastrous life of saiki k.#saiki kusuo#meows post
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Ty for answering my asks! Recently, I saw some fanart of the gender bendered crew and it got me curios, how much would the plot change if Jimmy was a woman. I mean, she would still be emotionally abusive (esp to Fem!Curly), but at lest, I guess, the crash would've never happened (?)
Also, her relationship w/ Anya: if she was assulted still, it prolly would've been dissmissed, since it's between 2 women. Or, if Anya is male in this scenario, he couldn't really be able to talk abt it, since society decided that "women can't r*pe men", so it's not serious and he should suck it up. Man, it's just sucks to be Anya in any scenario my poor girl 😭
What do you think? If you have an opinion on that at all, that is
-💀
I think the scenario's where the gender was flipped or any level of gender based intersectionality is expanded makes it so much more complex.
If this is the scenario with fem!Jimmy, it comes with the territory of questionable internalized homophobia. Does Jimmy brush it off in this scenario because she doesn't think lesbian encounters are real ones? Is she struggling with her identity and taking it out on Anya who may be openly queer compared a fem!Curly who is either straight or just not interested in Jimmy? Perhaps it's a sort of weird entitled that can occur in female dominated spaces "We're both girls, I know what you have, it won't matter." It's still is something I don't see Jimmy denying in this scenario, he never really denies it in canon just talks around it with Curly. Here I can see it's less about the pregnancy and more so about the internalized homophobia. Not seeing Anya as anything but an unwanted aspect of her femineity and the allure of it, there's a lot more objectification of both Curly and Anya in this alteration as I would believe feels better thinking of them in that light if they are just fodder in her mind. Guilty pleasures that no longer bring her such. It's a careful situation because I don't want this to fall into predatory lesbian stereotyping, Jimmy is just a person who does not respect other people or their choice, if it conflict with what he wants or perceived is owed.
The idea of Curly having to report it and outing her not only as a rapist but queer and the denial, especially in the case Anya and Curly are both out as she feels a sort of resentment she can't be secure with herself that way. If it is masc!Curly, there could be the jealousy of him being able to actively pursue relationships he wants while she feels she can't, Anya and Curly playfully flirt, its casual but it's something she longs for in the same way she doesn't. She obsesses over Curly because she wishes she could be Curly in a social sense in both aspect male or female Curly.
If it's fem!Jimmy and masc!Anya? It's a much more delicate situation. In this scenario Jimmy gets pregnant. Maybe Anya does a blood test after the incident and finds out Jimmy is pregnant. It's a very sensitive matter because if it's fem!Curly her first assumption is Anya may have done something. That is just the immediate assumptions in cases like this. I think the fact that Anya is telling her would make Curly think it's not that simple, especially since Jimmy isn't brining it up or really caring but everyone reacts differently. Jimmy is pregnant however, and that's a big deal, she'll figure that out eventually on her own but how will she react? Curly knows it won't be good, Anya knows too.
I think the crash is instigated in this scenerio by fem!Curly actually doing more, refusing to sweep it under the rug because she can conceptualize that fear, likely she and Jimmy are the only girls on board. She trusts everyone, well did trust everyone, but it's just something you live with. She can't just live with that double standard but I feel like she really doesn't know how to address it. How does she bring it up to superiors without implicating Anya? What does she do with Jimmy, it still feels like she's catering to Jimmy but now the concern is primarily focused on the life this baby will be born into. If it is born at all. I don't think Jimmy would try to kill Anya in this concept but try to spin the narrative it was mutual up until she got pregnant. Curly doesn't really buy it but it's a lot of processing, a lot more he said she said but what Jimmy is saying just doesn't make sense. It gives Jimmy too much time to really settle with the fact she's pregnant and likely can't support a kid nor wants to give birth out in space. Jimmy feeling like she's being othered from the only other woman could also be a factor, maybe even starting into her thinking Curly is behaving like a "pick-me" for siding with a guy over her. The crash is more spiteful in terms of having to protect herself alone, due to Curly not outright supporting her delusions.
It really adds a certain horror to Jimmy's pregnancy hallucinations because after the crash they are about her, her symptoms the sign of showing. She doesn't want the child either and considering what being pregnant can do to your mental/physical state, especially some of the more negative symptoms, I doubt she is handling it well. A lot of Anya's struggles are with the stigmas around male victims. His body reacted so did he want it? He's gonna be a father and courts likely will make him pay or care for the baby even if they take Anya's side, their world is just like that. Would the other's blame him for not doing more, he is a man after all? Should he be considered lucky a woman was that into him? It's eating away at him because not only does he not feel safe, he actively blames himself.
In the case Curly is still a cis guy, its that weird feeling guys often get when talking about male victims of assault. I don't think he'd victim blame but he likely asks or thinks about how it could've happened, why wouldn't Anya just overpower Jimmy? Maybe he couldn't? Maybe Anya didn't have it in him to strike a woman. He wouldn't. Now he thinks of what he would have done if Jimmy did something like that to him. SImilary to my trans!Curly post, he's wondering if it could've been him. It's likely one of the first times in his life he has to think of that type of vulnerability in terms of himself and other men and against likely his girl best friend. I think that arm pat right before Jimmy crashes the ship would really make him feel weird, not like he'd have the time to really dig into those feeling but y'know WERE GONNA CRASH!!!.
In terms of Jimmy and Curly's specific relationship, it just gets messier if they aren't both guys or girls. There's a lot of misogny on Jimmy's side with fem!Curly. He often points out she's a woman captain or makes a point of her being one of the few independent woman in her field and how certain men hate that. It's insidious but Curly doesn't think about or like to cause she likes to believe Jimmy isn't one of those guys. He can be a bit antiquated, maybe a bit of a pig but no ones perfect! Here a lot of his resentment is more gear toward a woman having that power over him as Captain/filling the typical male roles he fails at. He can't stand that she's above him in almost aspect and he likely takes it out on other women. Similarly, fem!Jimmy and cis Curly is just as bad. It's a fact of not knowing if she wants to be him, wants him or wants to destroy him. It's obsession without anything positive. She feels entitled to his space and life and time and he has a hard time setting up boundaries cause, well, Jimmy's a girl, his bestfriend and it comes with all the stigmas around boygirl best friends. To him it's a sort of oppressive doting, he feels wrong telling her not to pick and like he's being controlling. That's how she'd spin it whenever he'd try to make boundaries with her.
They are still just friends but most people can't tell even if they can tell it's not healthy, in both cases. Either way I feel like if they were opposite genders to each other there would a specific infatuation Jimmy would have with Curly that would be less hidden but sort of unaddressed because the idea of Curly rejecting them would make them lash out in a way Curly may just leave for their safety. It's also Jimmy wouldn't want to be with Curly specifically but just want what would consistently provide/available.
If they are both girls, its envy. It's that sort of hate that someone fits the standards you don't, wanting them to be picked second or crack. She likes to get into Curly's head, point out flaws and act like it's just her being helpful. She wants Curly to be a girls girl but only for her. There's a sort of possessiveness like purposely jeopardizing relationships because why would a man come first? That girl hates me and is a pick me, why are you friends with her still, Curly? Like this is silly but think about how Regina George treats Gretchen Wieners and that's effectively how fem!Curly and fem!Jimmy would work but technically Curly has the sway of Regina.
I believe the crash would always happen. Jimmy would try to escape responsibility or really thinking about what they did in any world, any gender. It's about facing the consequences, losing things he refuses to let go of or having to deal with responsibilities he's not ready for. The switching of sex or gender really doesn't change those core aspects.
#this is long cause theres so many ideas to play with here and how jimmy and Curly would work but the specifc things happening with Anya#like if she wasnt pregnant thats a relief but its the sort of situation where she has to think about her own sexuality in the scenerio shes#queer and how Jimmy affect her. Its addressing it with Curly who may get it but maybe she gets it too much maybe its hard to hear about Jim#cause for all she knew Jimmy was straight and now she has to think of all the odd conversations and nights they shared beds and maybe#feelings she had but she has to focus on putting Anya first but what does she do? Outing someone is bad but this can be dismmised?#Would the pony express just punish both anya and jimmy and curly what if theres a dont ask dont tell policy? what if they dont care cause#they are all women. its not an issue if its just girls not getting along after “experimenting”. Back to male Anya and female Jimmy they wil#assume it was consensual and anya just doesnt want the kid often that is pushed on male rape narratives. Jimmy is pregnant and on edge#does Curly also have to factor in the child? I feel like the feast scene would be Jimmy delusionally thinking Curly is helping support the#child i mean he is the most well off the bread winner he puts food on the table he is the food! Would polle being Anya talk about how Jimmy#doesnt have it in her to foster a child to support one emotionally without damage? Why so focused on making Curly the idealized male#or provider in her life when she went after him? For female Curly is it envy that she did this to herself and Curly has even more prospects#than her now? What if Anya was fawning because he didn't want the kid but hated the idea of Jimmy killing it to spite him? Or perhaps using#it as a means of control because even if he doesn't want it i doubt he wants it to be punished or abused. It is a burden something no one#wanted but it is being fostered five months in and Jimmys showing a bump and Anya cant ignore all the implications of it being born to her#maybe he kills himself to avoid living in a world its subjected to that pain to to save himself from it. GOD the pills with Curly are worse#for male Anya fem!Curly because its so much more direct he cant shove something down a womans throat who is clearly unwilling it makes#him feel like Jimmy to watch her struggle against him and he cant do it and with Jimmy it is so much more direct about a mother feeding#theri child and abusing it like the nuance if any gender flipping was canon would tear this fandom apart now imma thinking crazy about this#thanks skull anon like really ur asks get me thinking#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#💀 anon#ask#curly mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing#captain curly#nurse anya#anya mouthwashing
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been thinking about the liyue gang and how id draw their physical builds so here are some thoughts i had for xy cy and gm in particular
- xingqiu, unsurprisingly, would be quite lanky. i like to think he has broad-ish shoulders, like a thin athlete's build? hes a long boy to me haha, long face, neck, limbs, fingers etc, so naturally hes stands (comparatively) tall at 5'6" or 5'7"
i like to think hes most physically attractive one and has that handsome princely and boyish charm to him because it adds a lot to his fuckass duality LOL
- chongyun is a lot like xiao imo! short stature but with muscular arms. he seems nimble and flexible because of his normal attack animations (which bears a lot of similarities to xiao's actually! this + the fact that chongyun's normal attacks create gusts of wind further reinforces my hc that xiao trains him). sometimes i watch high energy choreography vids on youtube and some dancers look incredibly light on their feet, almost like their body is inherently bouncy? and i imagine chongyun to have that agility to him. chongyun has a delicate face and aura and i let that bleed into my hcs for his fighting style and physical capabilities hahaha. hes kind of like a cat who's deceptively strong. as for height.. just a few inches taller than xiao, so perceptibly short at 5'4"
- ga ming my new beloved. pretty much similar to chongyun but more muscular and stronger just because he wields his claymore with ease. theres a noticeable weight different between cy and his claymore the way he lugs it up after he swings (or even other claymore users like razor who, on his last hit, bounces from impact). meanwhile ga ming literally slams his to the ground LOL. i love his movements though hes very swift and expressive and radiant.. if cy has delicate movements then ga ming's is fierce and (charmingly!) assertive
ga ming is wonderfully charismatic though, i know hes not well known in liyue harbor yet, but he seems like the type to gain a reputation from his friendliness. how could no one adore him hahaha. 5'5" for height! just between xy and xq
#tangy talks genshin#chongyun gets analyzed most my bad#this was super fun though#while thoughtful ; genshin chara designs will always look distinctly gacha and flashy so a lot of the designs kinda blur together in my hea#this is why i really like looking into their animations particuarly their normal attacks#i think it conveys their personalities really well! it's always something to look forward to when new characters release#i gravitate towards swords polearms and claymores most though because i like the act of swinging and slashing hah. it also requires a lot o#body movement and reflects a lot of irl martial arts fencing and other combat techniques#sword users are always really fun to watch because theyre inherently graceful hahah. i will admit it gets kinda repetitive#i think my favorite NA animation has to be albedo's.. very simple clean and refined. he stands elegantly and puts his arm behind his back o#his 2nd attack which ive been transfixed by since be first came out in 2020 LOL. i love albebo#wow these tags are long as hell#but anyway i actually have more thoughts on xq's physical appearance but its just me rambling about how i think hes funny as fuck#im a proponent of dashingly pretty princely xingqiu not necessarily because i want to bestow upon him desirable traits#but because i think its funny knowing hes just a bit of a loser under all that#hes well known (mr worldwide one might say) and the heir to a prestigious guild and chivalrous talented and prolific#but he writes self insert novels hates carrots had bad handwriting sings really bad#hes just a teenage boy#as always i will 100% have more to say about chongyun but ill save that for another post#ga ming on the other hand.. i dont have anything substantial to say but hes super fun to think about#hes such a likable character#wow these tags are LONG as fuck ill stop now.
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having swap au thoughts. *slaps roof of claus* there's so much mental illness in this guy. im gonna blow up everyone in the room and then myself
#what if you felt unbearable guilt because your brother went missing in the two seconds you were separated#and you feel like there mustve been Something you couldve done to prevent it#if only you had stuck together. if only you hadnt let him tag along on your basically-a-suicide-mission in the first place#but none of those things happened so you go through three years blaming yourself#continuing to search for him because maybe hes still out there. and maybe exhausting yourself on an aimless search is a way you can atone#and then you're pulled into this big destiny adventure so your searching is put on the back burner#you're so busy doing important things and meeting new friends and there are points in your adventure where your heart feels lighter#and maybe you open up just a little about the crushing guilt you feel. and your new friends say it wasnt your fault#maybe you start accepting that your brother is really gone but you have to keep living your life#saving your brother was a far out dream but saving the world is something you have the power to do#so you try your best. so you dont fuck up this time#your guilt becomes the fuel keeping you going#and then at the end of your journey#you find out one of the biggest obstacles on your journey#the human chimera that you felt kinda horrified at and a little bad for even as you fought them#is your brother you've been mourning and agonizing over not being able to save#so um. The Guilt is even worse now#now he doesnt just feel responsible for his death. he Now feels responsible for him becoming this Creature Thing under porkys control#and in a lucas dies scenario. hoogh i cant imagine how claus would feel after that.......#however the thing that spurred this post was thinking about the lucas lives postgame scenario (it just got a bit out of hand lol) so.#your brother is alive and back home again and youre so unbelievably glad#but the guilt still creeps up every time you see how much hes Changed. physically and mentally#you had just started to accept the fact youd have to live without your brother but somehow having him back is almost just as painful#things cant just go back to how they were before. youll never be the exact same happy family as you used to be#its strange adjusting to having lucas back and its strange trying not to step on each others toes with their trauma#you cant help but be clingy because you couldnt bear it if he disappeared again under your watch#but nobody wants to be watched all the time especially when youre recovering from your brainwashed identity as an army commander#FUCK I REACHED THE TAG LIMIT I WANTED TO RAMBLE MORE AUGH. THEY MAKE ME SO ILL. i swear its not all angst theres some lightheartedness in it#mother 3 swap au#mothfics
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every day i kick a rock and bash my head into the wall because i'll never get to go on a big space adventure and become tightly close-knit with my new found family up there <//3
#re lrb..........#i mean realistically if i was in the voltron/quintenary stars universe chances are i would probably NOT be one of the people#going on the space adventure.#i'd be roped into the plot when the aliens invade and earth almost gets destroyed. spoilers for arc 2 btw sorry#but man. child soldierism aside i wish that were me so so so bad#sadly kicks a rock when will EYE have a deep and mystical connection with a giant ancient cat :(#its not even that i want to interact with the main cast bc i dont really i just. wanna be in their position man#i think one of the reasons why voltron grabbed me so hard (among MANY) is how badly i wanted to do what the main characters did#i remember when i was first watching it while it was coming out i would CONSISTENTLY daydream about being launched into space#with a handful of other people and having to fight a war and grow up far away from home and all the suffocating stuff that came with it#and then coming back years later already solidly knowing who i am and being confident in that#so i'd actually be brave enough to be unapologetic about it. and i'd be found family with the people i went to space with also#that parts important#idk man just. i dont like saying i was abused when i was younger because i really dont think it was like that and it isnt even close to#what how people who have really been abused have had to go through#but sometimes i really do wonder. like now that im (mostly) out and able to review everything with an outside perspective#not even getting into the cult survivorism stuff this is JUST family dynamics im talking about here#bc that shit is a whole other can of worms#i think my parents were genuinely doing the best they could with the cards they were dealt but. jesus christ.#i would have given ANYTHING to be able to run away from all that. and throw magic cats into the equation? brother im GONE#anyway this tags ramble has derailed in a MAJOR way. tldr i wanted to be a paladin sooooo fuckign bad bro#like it actually makes me SICK how much i want a lion. red you are my forever girl even if only in my heart <///3#i still do want to do all that out of principle but its not as desperate now i just really love space and really want a big kitty friend#winter speaks
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Jayce telling vi she won't make it on her own.... okay mr. projector...
#viktor just turned his body into the arcane and you dont even know!!! his leg is purple!!!!#im not going to excuse vi for saying the kid knew what he was getting into bc he didn't bc he is a kid (here we have ms. projector)#but telling jayce he has always been complicit of this he just didnt have to see it... yeah exactly.#and like she obviousky regrets the kid dying but it was jayces fault lmao why does he blow up on her??? the name calling got to him#jayce thinking omg he is going to off himself and viktor just trying to hide the evidence of his murder akdhsksj well yes he does want to...#i was wondering why the council was so Flabbergasted about the nation of zaun?? like they dont care and basically dont intervene#in the undercity bc they don't have any interest or profit in there. they don't gain anything at all from there.#so of course when silco asks jayce says sure fuck it. the only thing the council needs from zaun is the gemstone and its not even theirs#it's probably just fear of agression towards piltover as another nation and not something they can control or repress#silcos reaction to cait being wheeled in akdhaksj it sounds like he said 'what' he probably didnt know the girlfriend part... understandable#i forgor about her bringing the platter out... like ofc i didnt forget it but i didnt see it coming there. with bad memory you can be#surprised every time you watch the same show 👍🏻#i haven't cried because well the foruth time is a stretch now to cry but i still got chills at the end with the missile impacting....#and like whay would have happened if cait didn't free herself.... like ofc she would have bc everyone in that room could have killed her#not vi etc etc but she did just leave her so who knows really#anyways the monsters appearing in jinxs vision when vi mentions her past family is so poignant to her change.... they dont have the intended#reaction vi meant.... and silco is trying to shut her up for jinx's sake and look what happened to him. like vi really couldn't understand#her sister now and maybe back then either.... like not to be a silco apologist but it seems like he was the only one who could handle her#maybe im exaggerating but it would have gone wrong either way i think like no matger how much love there is in between them#idk man its so bad. like maybe this could have been avoided but it would have gone wrong in a different way for sure#and this couldn't have been avoided#talking tag#watching arcane#three weeks away still.... what now....
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hey i might be controversial but im not really feeling the 12th doctor so far
#idkk idk what to thinkkk#i finished s8 today#im just nottt feeling ittt#i just think i might hate how moffat writes no matter what it is fdvxcdfdfv#i actually don't know WHAT is wrong because it's like... things i SHOULD be enjoying but im not it feels like its bad#idk idkkkk#i just feel there's something lacking and i felt the exact same way through the entire 11th doctor era#its just even worse now because i guess im tired#like im so desperate to enjoy this doctor like i did 9 and 10 and i just cant?? cant enjoy the companions and side characters as much eithe#idk man :(#i need to watch some older dw stuff and see if im idealizing the old episodes lmao#because i really want to have a fair opinion of this showww#heeeelpp ToT#i think i just dont like the writing? but i dont know enough about writing to actually say what's wrong#theres just something wrong#ouough#i still hold so much hope everyones always so excited about 12 and i was very excited and its just not ittt#ough ok byeeee#ok wait#like i think his personality is fine and stuff is fine it's just.. the stories? the way they present them? i dont knowwww#i just dont really like moffats dw i gues...#SAD
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my favorite thing about bt is when there's an opportunity for buck and t to have a deeper connection, but then t just shuts it down. like, go girl, give us nothing!!!!
#like outside of 7x04...have they had an actual conversation that didnt exclusively consist of sex or t being dismissive#ig you could argue their date scene#well both date scenes but come on the first one was like so bad#yeah they had a nice (im using that term very loosely) little conversation about coming out but then t made that closet joke and left buck#like okay listen its not tha big of a deal but it is!!!#how can you seriously sit there and be like oh yeah i was lying to myself about being gay because i was scared#and then when the (newly bi) man youre on a date with kinda freaks when faced with coming out not on his own terms youre surprised???#come on#be so serious rn#and sorry not sorry but i will always hate him for leaving buck on the sidewalk outside the restaurant#yes buck is a grown ass man and could get home safely#but its the fact that he didnt tell buck anything until his uber had pulled up#like that man was talking about the movie yall were planning on seeing on you were just watching your uber get closer#i dont care who you are that us just rude as fuck#and the your fathers alive in the finale#fuck off#like the conversation about t and his father was literally only included to connect to gerrard#deny it all you want but t really was a plot device in 7b#he had like what maybe 5 minutes of screentime#he is so over#anti tommy kinard#me thinks
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I am going fucking insane do they make drivers ed intentionally brain melting??
Everytime i hear this mans voice i feel like im watching honey crystalize or paint dry or cheese Very Slowly grow moldy
Like i know im overreacting but i cant focus on this?? I have to do 30 hours and its like every time i start watching one of the videos my brain turns off and i cant focus on what hes saying i hate online learning stuff so much
i dont care if i have to go to a classroom just make me learn this in literally any other way than listening to this man reading aloud multiple choice questions from a weirdly formatted slideshow for 30 minutes straight with the crunchiest audio known to man
#i know online learning is probably cheaper#but do you want me to be good at driving or not??#this is kinda important#IF I HEAR THIS GUY GO#And#the correct answer is#C#ONE MORE TIME#vammieposts#i sit in apush lectures for forty minutes everyday and im able to focus#clearly theres a wY to do this so its not so dull#JUST STOP WITH THE MULTIPLE CHOICE QUESITONS I BEF#like who decided this was a good idea?? multiple choice stuff is so repetitibe it all blends togther#and now i remember the wrong answers more often than the cofrect answers!’#drivers ed#i have 25 more hours of this i really dont think i can handle it#yes im overreacting but i cant do busywork i cant focus on dull things i really want to learn this and its not being taught well and that#upsets me a lot#its so so frustrating when theres an easy solution to bad systems and formats#and people dont see it??#it upsets me that so many things are being switched to online when that more often than not makes it MORE difficult??#my schools digital hallpass things??#unique apps to pay for parking in each coty??#digital doesnt automaticaly meant more efficient or convinient#its helpful in some areas#and much worse in others#this drivers ed is the worse end of the spectrum#because instead of being like oh heres the slideshow read it and take the test#it gives you a specific amount of hours you have to spend watching videos#i could just walk away and let the bideo play! like how does that prove that i know anything thats being tuaght??
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re: "good girl" i think they say it once randomly as a joke and its just one of those things that gets him wayyy more than they expected it would. so now its their secret weapon and they use it very sparingly and every single time he gets super embarrassed about it but it works ill tell you what.
#HES MY PRINCESS IDEK.#i dont think it happens naturally all that much because theyre usually in the business of calling each other names and being mean#so i think this would just be a random night where theyre on top and just think it would be really funny. to yank on his leash and call him#a good girl after bullying him into doing something. and well i just think it would get him is all i dont knowwwwwwwwwwwwww#i havr a lot of thoughts on the matter but i will stop for now#but the tldr is that with each other they tend to switch frequently and are always fighting#so i think itd take someone else being in the picture for hog to even realize how much he likes being a good boy :3#and i also dont think fish would be good at straightforward domming in the way he would want and they both know that#so its something he keeps between him and rat mostly. please dont ask me questions abt jrs sex life i have too many opinions on it#anyways. i think even tho fish knows theyd be bad at that they still feel left out so sometimes they go watch. they dont get anything out of#doing that theyre just sort of taking mental notes#all of this circles back to i think fish has always been the more sexually experienced of the two. and romantically.#i dont rlly think hog is a guy who dates i dont think hes ever been that and i dont think he made much time for hookups#(i think its cute if hes a virgin when they meet but 🤷 im not solid on it)#but i think for him hes just only ever fucked this one person and they do a LOT of stuff and it gets the job done so hes just never really#tried anything else. but. and again i have too many opinions on this but i think rat wouldnt be into their usual shteeze#i think hes a bit of a freak in his own way but the blood and weird anger issues is just not doing it for him most of the time#but i do think if given the opportunity he would LOVE to be The Boss for a little bit so i think he and hog can explore that together and it#will work out beautifully for them. this is great because i am not into strict d/s dynamics like that but i know in my heart that hoggy#would be. and i cant do that for him#again i think fish would be butthurt about this. mostly in a 'why didnt u tell me so we could try this :(' and he would go#'because you would suck at it and wouldnt like it' and they go oh. right. well im still mad#ANYWAYS. circling back. i think the good girl thing would be something fish knows that rat doesnt. and idk if theyd tell him or not#because i do think if they tell him he is using that for evil hog is going to be a good girl forever and ever. rat doesnt have the patience#to space it out the way fish does. which idk maybe thatd be good for hog he could work through some stuff...#but on the other hand i think its fun if they DONT tell him and just bust it out sometime when all 3 of them are doing the deed. or whatever#because again they mostly like how embarrassed he gets about it and i think he would be reallyyyy flustered by it#^ this is essentially part of my fantasy about spitroasting my beautiful wife until he cries just so everyone knows#idk i just think when he lets go of himself hed be a very cute and kind of needy subby bottom and i think hed be really easy to fluster#about it and i want it so bad
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Sorry for the uptick in system stuff Im lowkey struggling and need to see system positivity posts or I'll explode
#malik's rambles#okay i know my ass is gonna vent in tags rn so . tw for that !!#iwill never shut up i missed tumblr tags so much wow#itsnot their fault and like . like i dont want to blame them . but its so isolating being and living this way#ill always be grateful for them and I know its just my brain trying to cope and like !! its not their fault but this sucks so bad like wow#also doesnt help that besides how scared I am and how I just . wanna be normal . I feel like I sound insane to other people#it constantly feels like everyone is laughing at us and is just playing along with our “roleplay thing” because they dont wanna bother#and like !! im trying really really hard to be positive about it and just live as well as I can . all of us are !! but it makes me feel like#ridiculous . it feels like everyone'll laugh and think we're playing pretend. which shouldnt matter people will always be assholes !!#I dunno aough im rantingso hard rn . and masa2 wont share which is fine but imscared and worried and scared and aauahhggggggggg#ik the point of the disorder is to hide memories from me so i can function but like . man this suckss9 bad#okay enough of this . Imgonna watch monsters inc i love monsters inc
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ive decided im gonna watch the finale stream where the server gets nuked quite literally to hell and back and the time loop goes on on the last day of the year and im gonna try to position it so the moment where tjey respawn in the new world happens the second 2025 starts
#because i know i Want to watch it. but its just like. to me its the last dsmp thing i know i can look forward to in the rest of the world#like its the Last ever One. its really really important its gonna suck so bad when i domt have it just there to still wait to watch anymore#but ya thats a good time i think#Also. im a bit scared to say this bc maybe theres something else or maybe it really is just executed too horribly and i don’t know what im#talking about but. i think aside from ctommy apologising to cdream bc What the fuck. i think apart from that i actually Do Really like the#ending. like literally everhtbing aside from it or at least what ive heard about how it goes#like. the emotional desperate final conversation between them. like im sorry im just an actual sucker for those types of things#they were the first actual rivalry everythimg in the server that happened was because of them. they were the last thing they saw before the#world endedAnyways. i dont evrn like discdu o what made yoy think that#but like. take that with a grain of salt maybe bc i dont know what im Talking about aside from what over#heard
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Another day I should have just outright avoided the news....
#im more exhausted every day and like#its getting so hard to not be really demoralized and lose hope for A Future#ngl its really hard to feel like life just only gets worse#steady downward spiral#having a down day i guess#😵💫 love steadily losing more and more hope i can even find a happy life for myself again#personal stuff#dont mind me i guess#just the state of things are getting me real bad#i feel so trapped and i have no real options#yay living here is soooooo fun cant wait for whatever shit they do tomorrow ..#it feels like im going crazy#every day we take another 20 steps towards a dictatorship that wants to Actually Kill Me#and the world just keeps going on. when does it stop? why is nobody else so stressed?#whats it like to be so removed from this shit that you get to close the app and it wont affect you really?#is the whole world just gonna watch us drown and just. ignore and forget?#i feel crazy for being kept up w insomnia at night thinking 'how long until i will have to flee with just the clothes on my back?'#and feel even worse and more hopeless because theres nowhere to go. nobody to rely on.#and i know theres other people who have it worse than me#other people who are similarly in crazy danger and i feel bad for feeling so selfish about being worried about my own safety#and my friends' safety#anyway sorry for the doom spiraling#its rough
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its a bit weird that i know both of my boyfriend's exes personally and even weirder that we all look like each other because he really has a type and there's the fact that his first ex shows up all the time on my instagram and his second ex is weirdly obsessed with trying to keep contact with him even though she was the one who left him for someone else (on december 23rd !!) and she stalked me on ig and she's friends with my roommate and like. this is my first time not being my partner's first gf so it's my first time dealing with ex gfs and it's all just super weird to me
#idk how to explain there's a bit of jealousy yes but mostly its just a weird feeling that i cant really explain#why are they both so close to me this is so unnecessary kfndkf#i think its a big green flag that they're both pretty and both very interesting people#and i cant say if them looking a lot like me makes me feel more or less insecure#bc yeah i sure am his type but am i enough like am i more or less than them (type of shit i think when im feeling insecure)#but in the end they both broke his heart and left him for someone else#i think what makes me mad is that they really did break him and i found him in pieces and watched as he picked himself up little by little#as we started dating and falling in love with each other but i know and he acknowledges that there are parts of him that broke forever#and the fact that they had these parts that i will never have because of them is what fucks me up sometimes#but at the same time he's grown and changed a lot and there are new parts of him now that they never saw and never will...#its not a competition i know but its really hard not to compare myself sometimes specially when theyre already so similar to me like#the comparison is already there its automatic kfndkdn u cant look at the three of us and not realize that we look like each other a lot#anyway#i think its more about my desire or my fantasy of having him all for myself#or of wanting to feel like im special and unique and not just another one??#its so dumb because its obvious that i am and he makes it very clear to me all the time#but thats it. i'm dumbbbb#im not even feeling bad rn i just saw his first ex again (she goes to the same hairdresser as me lol) and these thoughts came back again#so i wanted to vent#i think i deal with all of this pretty well but knowing how to deal with these feelings and thoughs doesnt mean they dont occur at all#ok im doneeee
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jesus christttt im not surprised at all to hear that the knuckles series focuses on wade and other human characters a lot i saw this coming a mile away with how almost all the news we were getting before the trailer came out was about the human characters/actors and not about knuckles (or sonic or tails or any other animated characters) but the fact that somebody calculated how many minutes of screentime knuckles has and it came out as LESS THAN HALF OF THE ENTIRE SERIES' RUNTIME when the series is NAMED after him is ridiculous. after this show comes out wade will likely have more screentime and overall plot relevance in the entire scu than tails does. did they actually think wade is a popular enough character for people to be down with this. what the fuck
#was gonna pirate the series but at this rate i might not watch it at all LMAO or at the very least only watch the parts with team sonic#because my interest in this series is dropping every second and i already wasnt very interested in it.#and i love knuckles so you know theyre doing something wrong if knuckles getting his own series isnt interesting me#the thing about wade is i dont even hate the idea of human characters. i dont think its bad for human characters to be present#and i dont think its bad for them to be involved in the plot and have relationships with the existing sonic characters#i personally didnt mind the wedding subplot in the second movie and i know a lot of people hated it#but. it becomes a problem when the random humans are overshadowing the characters people are actually here to see#like the show is literally called knuckles and all the marketing focuses on knuckles but its mostly about wade. allegedly.#and . i wouldnt have minded knuckles having a human costar. but again. they should be getting equal or less focus not more.#and also. its fucking wade who cares about wade enough to want this. would have been more forgiving if it was maddie or jojo or something#because i actually care about those characters. and also theyre not cops#for a moment i was willing to believe that the complaints about wade having way more screentime than knuckles#were a little exaggerated since a lot of people just get mad when the human characters have any screentime at all#but then i saw the article showing that knuckles really did show up for less than half the show and i was like Ummm. What#sorry for being so negative lately#its just that every new piece of info we get about upcoming scu projects has me like that reaction image of the guy holding a cigarette#like WHAT ARE THEY DOINGGGGGGG
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