#non binary man

[genderqueerdykes]

i have an interesting relationship with being nonbinary where im a man but in a not binary way, so a non binary man (words seperated on purpose) im a man but not in the sense most people think of.

some of this may be influenced by also being bigender/genderfluid (with nonbinary as the other one) in a more traditional sense, but thats a whole nother bucket i havent put into words.

(also i know demiboy and neoboy exist i just dont connect with those, non binary man makes the most sense to me)

i also typically call myself a trans guy for this reason, it feels less. i guess gendered than man, but still has the implication of such, and boy feels too young (and also too gendered)

hope this made sense, anyway the discussion around nonbinary as a label reminded me of my own feelings around it. i personally find the whole trinary/binary being formed annoying as hell, because it felt like trying to put people into slots again rather than making useful words and labels and letting people choose what fits them best

hello there! thanks for taking the time to tell us about your own experience with it!

i've met others who identify as non binary men, very similarly to what you've expressed! there are many ways to be non binary and i think people have started to way over simplify things. i think a lot of people have just gotten an idea of what non binary means into their heads and they just won't let go of it. for some reason people don't want to let it be flexible despite trying to force it on people who don't want it

i'm glad to hear that you are also frustrated with how people are literally just creating another binary. all over again. gender is not a binary - non binary... binary. the entire point of identifying as non binary is to say that you literally exist outside of a binary. it's destructive. it's like you said, it's here to control people. that's really it. it's about control over other people's identities and narratives.

thank you for sharing! i hope you have a great day and let us know if you ever need any help

[pupsmailbox]

Mascneu ★ ❭ Which someone feels as if they are masculine, but in a non-binary, androgynous, or simply neutral way

Solarian ★ ❭ Non-binary individuals who are male or masculine-aligned.

Solarset ★ ❭ Where one feels their gender is neutral (or slightly masculine), but with strong masculine influences.

Neuvir ★ ❭ Gender that is male or male-aligned, but is entirely neutral, rather than masculine.

Nixvir ★ ❭ Gender that has both genderless and masculine aligned aspects.

Neutro ★ ❭ Which someone feels as if they are non-binary, androgynous, or genderless(-aligned) but in a masculine way.

Neutroboy ★ ❭ Neutrois or mostly neutrois with strong connections to masculinity.

Non-Binary Man ★ ❭ Someone who identifies both as a male and as non-binary.

Dawnset ★ ❭ Neutral gender identity with slight masculine influences. One may use masculine gender labels, but still feel that their gender is not entirely or very masculine at all.

Verdeboy ★ ❭ Term for an agenrine/neutral boy or man. A boy or has a connection to manhood, but they also have a connection to agenderness, genderlessness, or neutrois, either in their gender or their gender expression.

[ballsalsda]

It annoys me when people talk about genderqueer and gnc mascs having "masc privilege" because. Look at me. I have an ambiguous voice and I dont dress like a certain gender. I don't have much body hair and I have long hair. People have to ask me if im a boy or a girl. Im treated different because im a "boy" who likes other boys. I try to be male but I cant seem to do it right. If I even try to say I'm non binary or dare I say my real gender, people will call me chronically online or keep treating me like a boy. Just because I'm amab and have a connection to masculinity, do you really think that I have masc privilege?

Even ignoring how genderqueers are treated by cishets, we're demonized by the queer community. We're told we're "less queer". We're forced into a binary of "man" and "non-man", or "binary" or "nonbinary. There are "female and nonbinary" spaces that will kick out masculine non binary people, or even female/non binary people who are also men.

No matter how masculine I try to be, it's always going to be queer masculinity. Genderqueerness will force us out of male privilege even if we're men or masc.

[kursed-katts-reblog-dump]

“he is so me” i comment in a picture of a silly cat. hundreds of people like said comment in agreement. little do they know i mean it in a xenogender way

[krookxed]

Posting some of my favorite trans people for TDOV

[yellowyarn]

Actually, the "F" on my passport is for faggot, not female.

[mascflowers]

A study just came out from Harvard about how gender affirming surgeries are more commonly performed on "cisgender men/boys" than transgender and gender diverse (TGD) people.

But these men/boys have gynecomastia which, if they were born with it (and the study doesn't specify), they're not just "cisgender".

They're intersex.

How many times now have intersex people told us perisex (non-intersex) people to stop using the statistics of their surgeries just as trans talking points, while erasing intersex people on the whole?

We have no idea how many of those surgeries were forced, or coerced, onto these intersex people. Either from doctors, parents, or even societal pressure.

Perisex trans people need to do better. We have to be better allies to intersex people than this. It disgusts me just how much we have failed our own community, time and time again.

UPDATE

The study actually specifically excluded intersex people.

"Importantly, all surgical procedures among patients with indications of differences in sex development or patients with other medical indications for surgery (eg, cancer, injury) were excluded..."

I'm happy to see this particular study has taken care to exclude intersex people, since surgeries done on them cannot be compared to transgender surgeries, but please bear in mind that this is still just one study.

The horrible truth is that medical abuse against our intersex siblings is still heavily normalized within the medical industry. From using terms like DSD, to forcing kids and even BABIES into sexual binaries with non or dubiously consensual surgeries or HRT, these horrors that intersex people have to go through are all too normal for them. That's unacceptable.

If you have reblogged this post without this update, I urge you to delete that reblog and reblog this version instead. We can fight for intersex rights and (if you're also perisex) show our solidarity without spreading misinformation.

[gor3sigil]

Before starting T, when I socially transitionned, I was surrounded by radical feminists who saw masculinity as gross and inherently evil, something to avoid, something to make fun of, something to destroy. The other transmascs in my friend group, sometimes, told me that they didn’t knew if they really were non-binary or if they just were scared shitless of saying “I am a man”. Because they saw this as a betrayal to their younger self who had been SAd and abused.

I saw many of my masc friends and trans men around me hate themselves, not outing themselves as men because it would imply so so much, it was like opening the Pandora Box. Even when we were just together, talking about our masculinity was always coated with bits like “I know we’re the privileged ones but…”, “I don’t want to sound like I have it bad but…”, “Women obviously have it worse, but last time…” and we were talking about terrible traumas we experienced while taking all the precautions in the world in the case the walls were a crowd of people in disguise waiting to get us if we didn’t downplay the violence we faced, or like crying and being upset and being traumatized and afraid and scared and to say it out loud would make us throw up the needles we were forced to swallow every second of every day living in our skin.

Most of us weren’t on T yet, some of us were catcalled every day and harassed in the streets or in abusive relationships nobody seemed to care to help them get out of because they were “strong enough” to do it by themselves.

I was using the gender swap face app and cried for ours when I saw my father looking back at me through the screen. The idea of transforming, of shedding into a body that would deprive me of love, tenderness, and safety, was absolutely terrifying. I knew I couldn’t stay in this body any longer because it wasn’t mine, but I also knew that if I was going to look like my dad, my brother, my abusers, it would be so much worse.

5 years later and I’m almost 2 years on T, and almost 2 months post top surgery.

I ditched my previous group of friends. I was bullied out of my local trans community. But let me tell you how free I am.

I was scared that T would break my singing voice: it made it sound more alive than ever.

I was scared that T would make me less attractive: it made me find myself hot for the first time in my life.

I was scared that T would make me gain weight: it did. But the weight I put on is not the weight I used to put on by binging and eating my body until I forgot that it even existed. It’s the weight of my body belonging to me, little by little. The wolf hunger for life.

I won’t tell you the same story I see everywhere, the one that goes “I started going to the gym 8 times a week, I put on some muscles, I started a diet and now I look like an action film actor”, in fact if you took pictures of me from 5 years ago vs now I’d just have more acne, I’d have longer hair and still look like I don’t know what to do with myself when I take selfies.

But the sparkle in my eyes, my smile, tell the whole story way better than this long ass stream of words could ever.

I want to say some things that I wish someone told me before starting medically transitionning.

It’s okay to take your time. It’s your body, it’s your journey, if you don’t feel comfortable taking full doses and want to go slow, the only voice you need to listen to is your own. Do what feels right.

If you feel overwhelmed, it’s okay to take a break, it’s okay to ask for support.

Trans people are holy. Everyone is. You didn’t lose your angel wings when you came out because you want to be masculine. You are not excluded from the joy of existence, from being proud of yourself, from being sad, from being scared, from being angry. The emotions and feelings you allowed yourself to feel while processing what you experienced when you grew up as a girl and was seen as a woman are still as valid as before. Nobody can take that from you. If someone tries to, don’t let them.

It’s perfectly normal to grieve some things you were and had before you started to transition, like your high soprano voice or even your chest. Hatching is painful. You can find comfort in things that don’t feel right, so making the decision to change can be incredibly scary and weird and you deserve to be heard and supported through this. Wanting top surgery doesn’t make the surgery less intense, less terrifying, less painful to recover from. When it becomes too much you have the right to take a break and take some deep breaths before going on.

You don’t have to have a radical, 180° change for your transition to be acceptable or valid or worthy of praise. Look at how far you’ve come already. It doesn’t have to show, you’re not made to be a spectacle, you’re human and it is your journey.

Oh, and last thing, you know when some people say “Oh this trans person has to grow out of the cringy phase where you think that you can write essays about being trans or transitionning or just their experience because it’s weird” ? If you ever hear this or see this online, remember all the people whose writing you read and, even if they were not professional writers, helped you more than any theorists did ? If you want to write, do it. It won’t be a waste. It can help people. Or it won’t, and even then, if it helped you, that’s enough.

Love every of my trans siblings, take care of yourselves. You deserve the world.

[island-76]

Here's your reminder that AFAB doesn't mean that person has breasts and a vagina. That AMAB doesn't mean that person has a flat chest and a dick.

AFAB PEOPLE CAN HAVE DICKS.

AFAB PEOPLE CAN HAVE FLAT CHESTS.

AFAB PEOPLE CAN HAVE BEARDS.

AFAB PEOPLE CAN HAVE DEEP VOICES

AMAB PEOPLE CAN HAVE TITS

AMAB PEOPLE CAN HAVE PUSSIES

AMAB PEOPLE CAN HAVE CURVES

AMAB PEOPLE CAN HAVE HIGH-PITCHED VOICES

Don't let AMAB and AFAB become the progressive binary

[agendercryptidlev]

We need to talk more about the transmasculine suicide rate.

There's a common saying that every transgender suicide is a murder, because it is the lack of acceptance in society that leads transgender individuals to commit suicide at such a high rate, this is true of trans men who have the highest suicide rate across all gender identities:

[image ID: a stylized graph depicting the percentages of considering & attempted suicide for different gender experiences.

Cisgender boy/man: 28% considered suicide, 8% attempted suicide

Cisgender girl/woman: 37% considered suicide, 10% attempted suicide

Transgender boy/man: 59% considered suicide, 22% attempted suicide

Transgender girl/woman: 48% considered suicide, 12% attempted suicide

Nonbinary/genderqueer: 53% considered suicide, 19% attempted suicide

Questioning: 48% considered suicide, 14% attempted suicide

end ID] ID by @tstomboy

Trans men are not receiving the support they need, and many of them are not surviving because of this. We need to make sure that mental health support and suicide for transgender individuals is as inclusive as possible for these transgender men who are at the highest risk.

We need to ensure trans men feel safe and welcome within the queer community as isolation is one of the more exacerbating factors on one's mental health. We need to make sure resources for victims of sexual violence are inclusive of transmasculine individuals, who face the highest rate of sexual abuse and yet often have to recloset themselves to find support. We have to love trans men because society shows them nothing but hate.

Check in with the trans men in your community, you may just save a life.

[shamebats]

Very fascinated with the phenomenon of cis women (especially relatives & occasionally random terfs on the internet) mourning the "loss" of trans people's boobs.

Like girl it's literally just fat & tissue existing on another person's body, wtf is your problem?

[genderqueerdykes]

from Original Plumbing, a publication for and by transmasculine people.

What's your favorite part of being a transsexual?

"While I often wish I was born a bio boy and didn't have to go through all of this, it's more often that I find it a blessing to have lived and experienced both sides of life, sex and gender and get to play in-between. To have been a girl, a woman, a lesbian, a dyke, a tomboy, a 'questioning', a boy, and now a queer man is pretty amazing and fucking hot!"

[alienbycomics]

A comic collab I made with my non-binary transmasc friend LM about our experiences feeling at home in our bodies 🪷

Check out more from my amazingly talented friend LM on Instagram:

https://instagram.com/lmperttula_design?igshid=NTc4MTIwNjQ2YQ==

[one-hell-of-a-showtime]

Hey, a blog I used to follow (nonbinary support) reblogged a post talking about how “trans men are the men of trans people” and I really advise all of y’all to stay away from them. It scared me, because I’ve been following them for some time, and they’re supposed to be for nonbinary support. You cannot support nonbinary people while also being transandrophobic. You can’t. I unfollowed them, and will probably block them like I did with another blog, a popular sex ed blog, and I’d really advise y’all to do the same. Trans men are men, but they are NOT privileged over other groups because of them being TRANS MEN. Nobody is privileged for being trans!

[poll-boy]

HAPPY PRIDE MONTH!! If anyone has any pride related polls please submit them!! i want to do a bunch for pride month :)

any poll submission at all is appreciated though! so if you want to do something non pride related please do!

[justdavina]

Oh MY!!! I'm in LOVE ....again.