#nobody is doing characterization like these crooks

[fishwikipedia]

marina not peeling her eyes off wheeler the Entire goddamn time is deeply sinister lol

[kaleen-art]

Lupin Zero Sucks (Clickbait)

Spoilers. Duh.

Lupin Zero is a 2022-23 6 episode miniseries following the adventures of Lupin III and Daisuke Jigen as teenagers. I watched the full series recently. It’s very rare I watch a show and am both in awe and also disappointed. Here are my thoughts:

Chapter 1: Aesthetic

Lupin III Part 1 is my favorite Part. It’s where I think the characterizations are at their best and the A-Production episodes with the involvement of Hayao Miyazaki and Isao Takahata are some of the best Lupin adventures to this day (not a big fan of Osumi’s “deep and emotional” episodes, will make another essay about this probably). Zero takes a lot of influence from Part 1 and I love it. The music is on point and matches with the very late 60s-early 70s stylings of the first series. The animation and expressiveness is also on point. The artstyle is always distinctive and it’s amazing how they were able to translate the artstyle of the original series into a digital era when I felt like previous attempts (see: digital Part 1 art, Return of Pycal (sorry Shmeepy)) failed. I hate the filter applied over the series though. Besides it just muddying up very nicely done backgrounds and artwork, it also makes the whole series feel like a TikTok “edit”. It’s gross. But at least everything else about the series’s aesthetic is strong enough that this is only a minor nitpick.

Chapter 2: Lupin and Jigen

The best part of Lupin Zero is definitely the relationship between Lupin and Jigen. Jigen is a stone-cold criminal with experience to his name at the start of the series and Lupin is (though he wouldn’t admit it) a rookie crook. Both have exactly what the other one needs. Lupin gives Jigen the love Jigen seemingly gets from nobody else, and Jigen provides Lupin with a partner in crime. Their dynamic as the show goes on, especially prominent in Episode 4 (The Best One) and Episode 5 (Had the great scene between them) is great and the highlight of Zero. The gay vibes are strong on this one and I’m pretty sure this is the part of the show the writers wanted to do the most. Like I said earlier, the show ties in with Part 1 very nicely and the Lupin-Jigen dynamic is no exception. I love Part 1 Jigen so it’s no wonder why Zero Jigen is also great. I like when he Has Fun and Smiles I wish they let him do that in Part 2 and the new stuff.

Chapter 3: Lupin and his legacy

I really like how they executed Lupin’s relationship with his family. Lupin (the Third) and Arsene Lupin both want him to become a thief, but Lupin the Third wants to forge his own path instead of adhering to his grandpa’s expectations. Meanwhile, Lupin II wants Lupin to follow the “straight and narrow”. I think this show not only speaks to the feelings of teenagers of every generation, but especially the generation growing up in the 50s and 60s who would become adults in the 70s. Speaking as a teenager who is in the Gen Z generation I understand how it is to feel the weight of the previous generations and their expectations for you, but I also know this was an especially prevalent issue amongst the youth of the mid 20th century, and I think Lupin in Zero really represents that. At the end of the show, he is able to forge his own path and later becomes the Lupin we know and love, resolving this generational conflict. This is another aspect done great in Zero.

Chapter 4: Lupin and Yoko

Fuck Yoko. She ruins the show. This isn’t a joke.

Yoko is… I think? Lupin’s love interest? “But isn’t that Jigen-” THAT’S WHAT I’M SAYING! The show felt the incessant need to add a female lead so they could have boobies on screen. The problem is it’s really gross in Zero. Yoko is an adult ass woman flirting with Lupin the 13 year old and it’s very groomy. In the first episode she even sings about forbidden love (with someone younger than her) to Lupin and Jigen. She contributes close to nothing to the show up until Episodes 5 and 6 (a two-parter). In those episodes, she has a plot with this guy named Gaucho who is like, the villain, and like… She loves him but she also loves Lupin, and it gets really convoluted and dumb. If it seems like I don’t care, it’s because I don’t. 

At the end of the show Gaucho dies and Yoko is in a life-or-death situation, so she decides to kill herself to die with Gaucho. She does this in front of two children, one of whom she is fully aware that he's in love with her. This is a character we are meant to feel sad about when she dies.

She's a total creep and throws me out of the show whenever she's on-screen. I feel like if she didn’t show any interest in Lupin besides an innocent friendship, and Lupin just fell in love with her anyway, that would be significantly better. As is, she gets way too flirtatious with someone literally less than half her age for me to give a fuck when she dies.

I think if they really needed her to be in the show (she does not need to be there) they should’ve removed her and Lupin’s “romance” entirely and instead tried to parallel Lupin and Jigen’s romance plot with her and Gaucho, showing how she and Gaucho are like a bad version of the two. That, in my opinion, would’ve worked a lot better.

Chapter 4: Too Much, Too Little

My biggest problem with Lupin Zero is it tries to cram too much into 6 episodes. If it had just stuck with Lupin and Jigen’s relationship blossoming + Lupin vs. his family, it would’ve been killer, but the stuff with Yoko as well as the final two episodes’ weird war-government plot just muddies up a great idea. It leaves me disappointed because I think Lupin Zero had so much potential but it was ruined by the writers forcing in ideas that detract from the themes already present instead of adding to them. 

Conclusion

Overall, is Lupin Zero worth a watch?

I mean it’s only 6 episodes, you might as well if you like Part 1 or Lupin x Jigen or anything of that sort.

But do I think it’s as great as people have said it is?

God, no. It’s messy and I think overall it’s a 6 or 7 out of 10. 7.5 on a good day.

Good but nothing remarkable. But if this kind of show is what Lupin III series…es went forward with? I wouldn’t be mad, not one bit.

Anyway don't forget to like and subscribe for more bad takes, ok bye see you when I remember I have a tumblr again

[tunnelofdusk]

james/sirius/remus, 4.5k wip, beta help pls

would anyone be able to help beta-read a james/sirius/remus wip? 4.5k so far.

cw: possessive behavior, manipulative relationship, mentions of murder, mentions of sex

rating: teen & up audiences? mature maybe for the themes? there's no nsfw explicit scenes in it.

the focus is remus observing the toxic nature of james/sirius relationship and getting slowly sucked into it. he thinks sirius is innocent but really they're both messed up, haha... i'm looking for assistance with characterization & dialogue. there are scenes with 4 characters talking so i worry that their voices aren't distinct.

here's a little excerpt...

The light of the setting sun filtering through stained glass windows illuminates Remus’s bowed head on a library table, brightening the browns and highlighting the greys in his hair. As he issues a muffled groan into the crook of his elbow, Peter casts a sympathetic glance across the table. 

“Sirius?” Peter asks.

Remus lifts his head and rests it on his forearm as he casts his gaze upwards. “And James,” he sighs. 

Peter just nods, goose quill idly skittering across parchment. 

“It feels like,” Remus says, “that all James does is make excuses for Sirius. But he’ll never tell Sirius that he’s wrong…”

The scratching of Peter’s quill stops. “I think James likes it like that,” he says quietly. 

A frown ghosts across Remus’s lips, carving across familiar planes on his wan face. 

“James likes being a hero,” Peter says and the scratch of his quill resumes. He even idly flips a page on a splayed book, as if he hasn’t just made an astute observation that freezes Remus in his seat. 

“You think…you think he’s enabling him then?” Remus says. And he thinks about how nobody has ever taught Sirius when to stop. Sirius has never been taught moderation and James just eggs him on—schoolboy pranks and bullying Snape for now, but Remus wonders how far James will let Sirius go. 

Sirius, who has nobody but the Marauders. Sirius, with his wild smile and breathless laughter. Sirius, with his twitchy wand hand and smart mouth. Sirius, who burns so bright that it hurts to look at him sometimes. Sirius, growing handsomer by the day with a brittle confidence. 

And there’s James who seems to have it all—money, family, wit, charm, and burgeoning good looks. James, who sees himself as a righteous boy correcting wrongs delivered unto him and his. James, who never thinks he’s wrong. James, whose jealousy manifests as bullying. James, who found Sirius on the train and never looked back. 

(“But I think that’s what we do too,” Peter murmurs.

(Remus unfolds his slumped body and he casts an inquisitive glance—all honeyed amber—at Peter. “Sorry, did you say something?” he says.

(Peter stares back for a moment before he slowly shakes his head.)

[shininguponthestars]

🍠 🍙 🍘 for the writer asks!

oh lord ok

🍠 How long does it take you to write one of your fics or a chapter/part?

let me check. sun falls was written in a day or two i think but that was years ago so i can’t remember. ummm. i think each entry for taking care of was written in like, a few days up to a week? ive lost my record of harrys bc apparently i reused an old doc, but jakes took 3 days apparently & rogers took 5 or 6. & the walt oneshot was done in a night or two because it was mostly a character study fueled by my godawful flareup. as for what im working on currently uh.

well its been rough. ive had other projects to work on. (+ writing ppl inebriated is HARD) as for active days ive worked on it id say ive spent like 4 or 5 days so far

🍙 Is there a fic you wish had gotten more attention?

honestly the jake one mostly bc i rlly like jake and think it works well as a character study. were ignoring everything else about it rn im in it for the CHARACTERIZATION. but jakes an unpopular character unless ur in The Bubble of ppl who like jake so. shrugs!

im pretty preemptively scared for how my next one will do? because its walt. nobody cares or thinks about walt. but im doing this shit myself ok. ppl will think about that guy by hook or by crook

also not necessarily fic but i wish a few of the phoney related asks on lotd got more eyes on them. guuuys the foreshadowiiiing dont we love roger and jake :( come ooonnnnn lets think abt someone other than dave <- so very silly. i love to think about dave

in general though i am astounded when my shit gets ANY attention whatsoever like i keep finding ppl talking abt my work in the wild and it ASTONISHES me each and every goddamn time. so im happy w anything

🍘 Is there a fic or idea for a fic that you've abandoned?

lets go look at a wonderful place i have dubbed my fic graveyard: my notes app!

most of these go here to die because i write them at 1am and they are illegible. this does not make sense because i also write my fics at 1am but whatever! that first one also may be familiar because it is copy paste smth i said in phonecord.

as for ones i actually started / made it past the drawing board, i had a few for miscellaneous fandoms that i just kind of got performance anxiety on. shoutout my npmd time loop fic you wouldve been so cool. sad im never revisiting that! heres an excerpt from a ypwd one

thanx for the qs ^_^ i loooove 2 ramble. heres my rogersport fics cover page which was bestowed upon me via my darling partner

[bigskydreaming]

Yessss, it only took two years plus the eighty four million more it felt like in my head but we're FINALLY getting to the Shiro rescuing Redroot from the Crooked Market/Otherworld story!

I do dislike that after all it was hyped up it was relegated to a six issue X-Men Unlimited side story BUT the flip side of that is its at least being written by Steve Orlando & Steve Foxe instead of Duggan, who I'm pretty sure was originally slated to write it. I'd MUCH rather have Orlando & Foxe writing it than Duggan, who completely wasted Shiro when he was on his year one lineup. We might get some actual characterization now, lol.

Plus I'm excited to see what Orlando & Foxe do with the opportunity to explore/worldbuild Otherworld a bit more. Next week's issue has Shiro in Blightspoke, which is by far the most interesting of the Otherworld provinces IMO. Very interested to see what they do with that. Also hoping that Shiro's journey takes him to Infernii the Everforge. If any mutant were to have an advantage there, it'd be Sunfire.

And I definitely prefer their take on Mad Jim Jaspers over Howard's. The way Howard wrote him, he was this kinda.....generic loudmouth, more bark than bite. They write him as the creepy, enigmatic reality warper who can do damn near anything and WILL do it just to fuck with you and I vastly prefer that take on him. THIS is the insidious ruler of the Crooked Market that nobody wants to fuck with. Even Jamie Braddock and Absolom Mercator are supposed to be wary of Mad Jim and this guy actually FEELS like he has that energy, rather than just paying lip service to it.

Also, I'm hoping that Foxe and Orlando, the 90s Deep Cut Kings, find some place to slip in a reference to Shiro's murdered-by-Mystique sister Sunpyre, because then we might FINALLY get Leyu resurrected once other writers remember she exists. It bugs me so much that she never even got namedropped Shiro's entire time on the Year One team, even when he was teammates with the literal daughter of his sister's murderer. Like.....Shiro is an abrasive asshole. He absolutely WOULD mention that the first time Rogue annoyed him, just for the reaction. The fact that Rogue had nothing to do with that and is in no way responsible for her mother's actions would be utterly irrelevant. He'd be like "I am uncomfortable and want others to be as well. What's confusing here."

(But seriously, the lack of respect for Leyu, one of the first canonically lesbian characters in the X-Franchise, like.....gah. Its so frustrating to me that barely anyone ever remembers she exists, when she was on the page gay before even Mystique herself. Bring her baaaaaack).

Anyway, still wish this story had its own arc in one of the main books, but to be honest I don't know where it'd go, so short of it getting its own miniseries, I suppose this is the best place for it.

[elonasblog]

In a dream, I saw someone with dirty blonde hair walking towards me

Dreaming about seeing a brownish haired person can be a fascinating dream. A brownish haired person can be characterized as a female with dim light hair.

To see a female with this hair tone can imply that you have provoked your reasoning concerning obscene, improper and evil things that encompass you. To see yourself with this hair tone is a positive dream it recommends that others will ask you for counsel. Finding the solutions to inquiries in life will assist you with avoiding negative reasoning.

In a dream, I saw someone with dirty blonde hair walking towards me

In your fantasy you might have Seen a person with brownish hair in the fantasy. Seen a brownish haired person strolling towards you. Considered yourself to be a brownish haired person. Hitched a ladies with hair that is brownish. Positive changes are in progress if You colored the hair in one's fantasy. The fantasy has caused you to feel good. The brownish haired person was a male. You had the option to assess your characteristics and conduct in the fantasy. Ready to help other people in the fantasy. Point by point dream translation Seeing a person with brownish hair in your fantasy is somewhat uncommon. There are sure implications when you see a female brownish in your fantasy. It might propose one's discernments throughout everyday life. While you are growing up, you are shaped by individuals who bring you up. This fantasy implies that you can distinguish the positive and pessimistic characteristics of an individual.

Seeing a brownish haired person in your fantasy suggests that your own perspective might change. There can be some adversely in cognizant existence assuming the brownish haired person is somebody you are wedding throughout everyday life. The visionary might experience some off-base doings like wrongdoing, defilement, contemptibility, pay off and any unlawful and corrupt demonstrations on the off chance that the person with brownish hair in the fantasy was a crook. To see a person with brownish hair male connotes your mindfulness about your internal identity wherein you will quite often deny, stifle. You likewise remain quiet about these qualities with the goal that you can cause no damage to anyone around you.

You might find the implications of this fantasy a seriously upsetting one, yet it's great to find out about the real subtleties of the fantasy so you will become mindful of potential shortcomings and qualities of one's attributes. Obviously, tolerating them is difficult. Be that as it may, nobody is great. By moving yourself to transform one's negative qualities, you will ultimately acknowledge them and see as more importance to life.

Sentiments that you might have experienced during a fantasy about seeing dull a person with brownish hair Aggravation, disturbance, disgrace, sympathy and trouble.

[noctilucous-sunni]

29. ❛ they’re dangerous? well unfortunately, so am i. ❜

RIP bc smth weird happened with tumblr and the ask disappeared when i answered it but then put it in my drafts. here is a screenshot of the ask. anyways sorry it took so long anon, things have been crazy around here!! lmao i hope that the characterization is alright 💀💀 and i hope you like it!!

100 f. event masterlist

overall masterlist

cw: suggestive themes, light possessiveness, sagau, (not proofread🫠)

You scowl, glaring at the Yashiro Commissioner.

“I’m going and you can’t stop me.”

“I wasn’t planning to. I’m simply concerned for your safety.”

Ayato flips through some paperwork on his desk, before looking up at you sitting on said desk. Nobody would ever dare do something rather disrespectful, but being the All-Creator had its perks. Including that the head of the Kamisato Clan would do anything and everything for you. Yet Ayato was so smug about the fact that out of all your acolytes, he was exclusively given your attention and affections. You’re utterly fond of the entire Kamisato household, he just so happens to be your personal favourite.

Jealousy seems to just spill out of nearly every other clan within Inazuma and even its own Archon looks upon the Kamisato Clan with such envy. (And you don’t even want to get started on the other nations)

Ayato is the one who calms you down after a sudden explosion of provoked rage, who wipes your tears and strokes your hair after a particularly jarring flashback. As long as the Yashiro Commissioner is around, you’re able to be vulnerable enough to fall into an easy sleep, often peacefully dozing on his lap. As long as the Yashiro Commissioner is around, you feel safe and completely at ease.

Your features soften, looking more like the gentle and graceful god of Teyvat you’re said to be.

Ayato stands up and walks over to you, leaning in close to move a strand of hair from your face. You sigh and close your eyes, pressing your head into the crook of his neck.

“I should go. I have to go.” You mumble resignedly into his clothing.

“Stay.” He holds your jaw gently, lifting your head and locking onto your gaze. You pout, enjoying the warmth of his hands.

“It could be dangerous.” He adds on, caressing your cheek.

You scoff at that. “The entirety of Teyvat bows before me. I’ll be fine.”

Ayato sighs. He just wants you all to himself for a little longer. You chuckle, bringing him out of his thoughts.

“This is what you get for not coming home, pretty boy.” You tease, playing with his hair, as he marvels at the fact that you, his beloved god, was here in the flesh.

A punishment?

He thought those in Mondstat certainly deserved one for what they had done to you. For being so blinded in worship they didn’t even recognize their real god.

“My sincere apologies, darling, but it seems like you came home to me instead.” Ayato hums, placing a quick kiss on your lips, relishing in seeing a pink blush bloom across your face.

You slap him on the shoulder lightly. Hearing the mischievous lilt in his voice, you knew he was up to something. Before you even try to speak, his hands drop down to your waist. Pulling you across the desk, to get even closer to you, so that your bodies are pressed together, he smirks.

If your heart rate hadn’t spiked already before, now you were sure it was going crazy.

Ayato starts to place yet another kiss, and then more and more up your jaw, pausing shortly between his words. “I don’t see the urgency in going to Mondstat, sweetheart.” He kisses back down your jaw now, silencing a whimper from your lips as kisses them once more.

“Ayato… There’s around hundreds of letters requesting my return. Some sort of apology… Poor Thoma had to deal with lots of them simply piling up and even resorted to burning some because there were just too many.” You finally speak, your voice breathless and a little shaky.

“I don’t… trust them. They’re dangerous. And what about treasure hoarders?”

They’re dangerous.

You stiffen, and Ayato notices that the ever so bright stars within your eyes have turned dark. He can see a storm brewing, dark clouds and wind blowing harshly with flashes of red electricity in its midst. Any other acolyte would tremble in terror, but Ayato has seen it before and he absolutely admires its beauty, your beauty.

“They’re dangerous?” You repeat, and the wind outside starts to whistle. The storm outside starts to resemble the storm inside of Teyvat’s own god. Lightning strikes loudly outside the estate.

“Well unfortunately, so am I.” You finish, but the more Ayato lays down soft kisses down your jaw, down your neck, the more he hums and utters sweet nothings across your skin, warm breath fanning over your face as he holds your waist tightly, the storm starts to recede and diminish until it goes back to way that it always was. Gone was the red lightning, as it turned back into its natural colour.

The Yashiro Commissioner smiles, a light hearted chuckle escaping him. “I know you are.”

You sigh as you feel his lips on your neck, closing your eyes in pleasure as he starts nibbling and leaving bites all over. Ayato knew that when you went to Monstadt (with him, preferably) they would all see that he was yours, and that you wanted him only, just like how he wanted you all to himself, for eternity.

[catgirlxox]

Another ramble, Omniverse gave us something we didn't get to see very often with Ben in previous contexts: Ben interacting with strangers. Not girls he thinks are cute like Julie or people he's meeting on the job but just like casual Ben and it's night and day from how he talks to his family and friends- people he's known for years and relaxes around or needs to confident for. We also meet No Watch Ben. And from what we see he's pretty laid back, he doesn't try to convince people he's great like when he was a kid trying to compete with Gwen for grandpas attention and time.

He's not popular but he's not unpopular, and he works well in team contexts enough that his room is littered in a bunch of different team sports gear and Ben won an award for soccer. No Watch Ben doesn't even get angry at Kevin when he steals Ben's watch, more bummed about not feeling like he really helped his team win. He even made friends with his bullies without the hero stuff to prompt it but without sacrificing his character.

Heck we even see it with Rook in the first episodes, despite not wanting him as a partner he isn't mean to Rook. He just doesn't want to get Rook's hopes up on the partner thing because it Wasn't discussed with Ben and well, he's knew. And because of some taunts from Zombozo Ben got it into his head that its time he prove he can do things on his own- like the ben 10k's of the future handling most of his enemies solo. Ben's caught off guard and expected to just roll with a stranger claiming he was assigned to help Ben without Ben having the time to confirm that one: he actually is a plumber and two: Grandpa actually did that to em.

Like yes we know grandpa was probably going to tell Ben before the mission started but only AFTER already choosing Ben's partner for him, telling Rook it's official, and Rooks already at earth waiting to meet Ben. Ben was probably the LAST person told this.

But he still does his job. Granted he does it while absolutely dazzled by the secret underground alien city NOBODY BOTHERED TO MENTION TO HIM GWEN OR KEVIN (like wtf grandpa) But his job he still does. Episode 5 have I got a deal for you is a personal favorite of mine for Ben's characterization and seeing him handle the situation on his own- if with the professors device helping at the end Ben handled the situation great. He was still goofy but he also got to show off that he's not stupid or easy to dupe and empathized a bit with Pax in the end which i loved "he means well, which makes him even more dangerous." Because Pax was reckless and didn't handle the situation with enough knowledge- and is a take immediate action without thinking the consequences through or explaining potential dangers kinda guy.

Also I loved hotstreak- Mostly how obvious it is that Ben just, doing his job. He's treating Ester like he would any crook he's tailing. For us it's clear he recognizes he's being flirted with- especially when he's backing off from her hug and making excuses to leave the situation at the end of the ep. Also how he just fucks with Rook.

Rook is being weird, one minute he's acting like Ben should respond to Esters flirting and accommodate ( Are you going to stay like that? how long does it take for the omnitrix to time out? I think our crook prefers this ben much more hint hint nudge nudge smirk) for her because she likes him but then gets mad when Ben accepts her invitation to play with her friends? Acts like Bens the one being unreasonable after insinuating Ben should be friendly to the thief so I dont know what was up with him this ep and Frankly if Ben did reciprocate he would have been cheating on Julie, because as far as he and the audience knew he was dating Julie at the time of the episode! Not acting on esters flirting and affections was the good response to it.

Ben's just kinda chill guy who likes a little adventure in his life and craves good company, and likes being appreciated for his work but learned its better not to demand it (and that captain narcissist nemesis isn't a hero worth emulating/aspiring to be like) Omniverse's Ben is my favorite for it, he still acts confident and like himself but the writers let him hold the braincell sometimes without everyone looking at him like he's shoving a knife in a on blender. (even in Alien force season 1 that's rare, and Ben was actively leader and in high stress serious mode) Idk maybe I just like the lighter tone and more cartoony action :)

Oh my god, don't even get me started on the implications of No Watch Ben. That scene you mentioned where the Kevin of that universe steals his watch and he has little to no reaction to it? Yeah, in conjunction with his clear lack of confidence due to the fact that he feels like there is a void in his life, that just serves to further imply that feels no reason to care.

Like, it's obvious that scene was supposed to be this parody of the Prime Timeline without the supernatural powers, but it just goes to show the impact those characters can have on their universe and each other when given the power to do so. The bullies becoming his friends instead ties into that, too, since they wouldn't have a reason to feel inferior to another average kid their age. It really is the man and not the tool, I think they were trying to say.

"Have I Got a Deal for You" was one of my faves too, back in the day. Comparing the way Ben was written in both that one and "Hot Stretch," I think you meant, I definitely agree. A lot of the haters seem to ignore the rational part of his character, despite the fact that it's there. He's got so much experience under his belt that he knows not to trust blindly. Even a girl being too friendly or flirty could be hiding something, and his responsibility is to keep the earth from harm. Since it's established he's willing to forgive people's wrongdoings (for instance Kevin's criminal past or the Highbreed's problematic beliefs), he keeps an open mind to where people are coming from but maintains that preventing disaster is his first priority. Ultimately, he's just trying to do his job, or in other words, "the right thing." Which has become his day to day. Omniverse really served to make that clear.

Or, at least I thought so. Thnx for watching the series and actually understanding the character and being reasonable :P

[nightowlwriting]

summary: beau says some shitty things to caduceus, and he comes to you. no matter what he thinks, you love him and you make sure he knows that he's not broken. (part 2/13 of the kindness series, a thematically connected series of c2/exu imagines)

word count: 1.6k

warnings: unintentional acephobia / arophobia (beau says some shitty things, but from a place of ignorance)

note: i am def not to the c2 episodes where cad is introduced but i love him already, so i'm not sure whether or not my characterization is on point or not, but in this house we love and respect aro/ace caduceus!!!!!

masterlist - request - support my work? - ao3

You know his feelings, and he knows yours. That’s why you and Caduceus get along so well, despite life on the road. There’s always some sort of friction in the group, even though it’s quickly smoothed over and forgotten. Things like that, though, never happen between you and Caduceus - which is something the rest like to point out with thinly-veiled jealousy when they’re in a tuff with another of the group.

Just thinking about your frictionless relationship with Cad makes you smile. You know that he doesn’t really get the way other people fall in love, or lust depending on who it is, and sometimes that makes you sad. But not sad in a way that you’d want him to change - Gods no. You love him for the way he is, and you know he loves you for the way you are. It doesn’t stop you from thinking about another life, another place, though.

That’s mostly irrelevant. You’ll be the first to admit, when you first found Cad and he joined your merry band of adventurers, you’d harbored a rather large crush on him. That, originally, started your kindness campaign toward him. Selfish, yes, but you don’t regret it. It has made you the closest friend you’re sure you’ll have in your entire life. He’d kept mostly to himself before you reached out to him, being nicer and nicer until… Well, until he started to return the favors.

That’s what makes you two work so well together. Everyone else is resistant, honestly, to the way you want to be nice to them. You know they have their reasons, so you don’t push. Eventually they are kind to you and, though you don’t do it just so that others will be nice to you, it’s a warming feeling to know that you have some impact on the people you travel with.

Caduceus is the one that goes out of his way the most for you, though. He’s the one that will prepare your meal in the way that you prefer, but Caleb hates, and adjusts Caleb’s accordingly. He’s the one that will listen to you and Jester fawn over Oskar, even though he’s not interested in the romantic or sexual aspects of Tusk Love. He’s the one that will hear you having a nightmare and wrap his large, warm body around yours to comfort you in the middle of the night. He is your best friend, and you’re his. (After the Wildmother, of course. You’d never get between them. It’s so clear how fond he is of her, and how fond she is of him.)

But all of these things, the history the two of you share and how close you are compared to the rest of the Mighty Nein, are the reason Caduceus comes to you late at night, tears wetting the fur on his face. It’s late, and you were asleep, but your door is open to anyone in the Might Nein. Cad knows this, which is why you’re surprised that he is knocking.

“Caddy,” You reach for his hand and guide him into your room, “What’s wrong?” He doesn’t say anything, opting instead to drape himself over you in a warm, strong hug. You feel his breathing stutter and then pick back up, a telltale sign he’s been crying for some time. Your stomach drops like a stone, “Hey, let’s sit down on the bed, okay? And then we can talk if you want or we can just sit.” He lets you lead him to the bed, but as soon as he’s at, he curls up with his back towards you and shields himself as much as possible with his arms. It’s like he’s afraid of you, sobs returning to jostle his body on your bed.

You let him have his space, stepping back but reminding him that you’re here - for him, in the room, for the long haul. You can’t let Caduceus think he’s alone in whatever he’s going through, because he’s not. He’s not alone, never, not with you around. Your heart breaks as he whimpers and rolls over, reaching a hand out for you. There’s no hesitation in your mind when you crawl into bed and let Cad fold himself around you, holding you so tightly that you’re afraid that he’ll break. “Caddy, I need you to calm down,” You wrap your arms around his middle, scratching lightly at the fur on his back to try and comfort him.

“Am I broken?”

“What?”

“Am I broken?” And then he says your name, pleading and so filled with sorrow, that it chokes you up for a second. “I think I might be broken.”

“Caduceus Clay, you are not broken,” You whisper, voice shaking as you pull him impossibly closer, eyes cresting with tears as you look, unseeing, at the wall over his shoulder. He’s buried his face in the crook where your neck meets your jaw. “I don’t know why you would think that, but I know you are not.”

He sniffles. “Beau said…” But he cuts himself off, jaw snapping shut with an audible sound as he squeezes his arms around your waist. You can feel his hands shaking as they clench in your sleep clothes.

“Beau says a lot of shit,” You turn your head to nuzzle your nose against the back of his large ear, hoping to bring some sort of comfort to him. Whatever she said to him has gotten him more worked up than anything you’ve ever seen, “She says a lot of shit and sometimes she doesn’t mean it, and sometimes she doesn’t really get what she’s saying. She’s an empire kid, Caddy, they’re sheltered and unsure and kind of… Well, they’re assholes. Beau is not immune to Empire Kid Asshole Syndrome, just like Caleb isn’t.” He shudders, a fresh round of tears wetting your neck and the fur on his face. “Cad… Caddy, come on, what did she say?”

“We were in Jester’s room,” He begins, voice calm but small, “And she was talking about Tusk Love again. Nott asked a question - about, I don’t know, I think our first time, but I don’t… I’ve never…” You press a kiss against his fur when he begins to work himself up again. He sucks in a shaking breath, “And I told them, and the Beau asked why and… There’s not a reason, I don’t suppose.”

“There doesn’t have to be a reason,” You whisper, “But if you want a reason, the reason is that this is how you’ve chosen to live.”

Caduceus continues like he doesn’t hear you, “She said that there’s no point to having friends, to being so close to you, if nothing will come from it. She said that life is about love and sex and finding someone to share it all with. She said that I was leading you on. That you’re in love with me.”

You whine low in your throat and push on Cad’s shoulders so he’s looking at you. You want him to not only listen to what you’re about to say, but hear it. He looks so sad, ears pulled back and eyes glassy. “I am not in love with you, Caduceus Clay. I love you. There is a difference. Once, yes, I thought that I might have been able to fall in love with you, but I know how you feel. What you feel is real, do you understand?” You pause for him to respond, but he just looks at you. “You do not need love and sex to live life, okay? And love - you have so much of it. I love you. The Mighty Nein loves you. The Wildmother loves you. You have so much love in your life, and if that is enough for you then that’s enough for you. Nobody has any say in what you want from life except you.”

“Am I hurting you? By not being able to fall in love with you?”

“No,” You say firmly, “Your worth is not measured by your ability or desire to fall in love.” Cad shifts on the bed, and you pull him closer, settling your forehead against his, “I’ll talk to Beau in the morning, okay? She will apologize to you - either this is a misunderstanding, or she was being intentionally malicious, but there will be an apology.”

His eyes slip closed, and the sigh that follows shakes as it leaves his body. Some of the tension melts away and you let one of your hands move up his body - making sure he knows you’re aiming for his face - until your thumb can rub soft circles in his cheek. “Do you believe me?” You ask, voice soft as he begins to come down.

“What?”

“Do you believe that you’re not broken? That you just are who you are? That it’s okay?” You press your nose against his for a brief second. Just a moment of comforting intimacy, but you don’t press it. “Do you believe what I said?”

“I’m not sure,” He stutters a little bit, frown tugging slightly at his lips, “I think that I could come to believe it because you wouldn’t lie to me.”

“Never,” You promise in a strong voice, despite whispering to him, “I would never lie to you. I’m not lying to you.” You shift a little, twisting your legs with his long and lithe ones, “Let’s get some rest tonight, and I’ll set Beau straight in the morning, okay?” You know he’s already tipping off toward sleep, his body warming and becoming pliant in your arms. Caduceus only hums and nods, one of his ears twitching as your breath hits it when you chuckle. Tomorrow, you’ll bring your wrath down upon Beau - lightly, because you’re almost positive she didn’t mean what she said and probably phrased it horribly wrong. Tomorrow, you’ll set it straight with the rest of the Mighty Nein, too - that not wanting romantic love, or sexual things, does not make someone broken. You’ll educate them and, if you get any pushback, you’ll make sure they know that if Cad walks, you walk.

You’re sure he feels the same way.

[maxwell-grant]

Any thoughts on Sandman Mystery Theatre and Wesley Doods?

I'll probably write more in-depth about Wesley in particular once I'm more acquainted with his history, because I've discovered recently there is much, much more to the JSA's characters than I had initially presumed, and some pretty massive bits of Wes's own history that I can't overlook in a more in-depth post. But regarding Sandman Mystery Theatre, I gotta talk about my history with it specifically.

I picked up the first volume of Sandman Mystery Theatre by complete accident when I was very young. At the time I was specifically looking for Sandman comics because I wanted to do a school project on Neil Gaiman's Sandman, which I knew very little about, and so I picked up at a store Endless Nights and a comic called Sandman Mystery Theatre that, as you can see in the cropped image above, had his name on the cover, so I figured it had to be in the same series (which it kinda is but not really).

While there's older stuff that's tied up in my appreciation of them, this was my first encounter with Pulp Heroes, even when I didn't know what they were, before I discovered The Shadow for real. Ground Zero, as we call it. And it all starts specifically with this page:

The comic had already started off completely unlike anything I'd picked up before from Marvel and DC. It was an urban story with no superheroes or cartoons in sight, instead there were all these regular, wrinkled middle-aged people with warts and sweaters and pudgy noses at the center of it, people that you don't find in superhero stories where the imperfections of humanity are ever shaved off. It was more akin to what I had only experienced through film, but in a comic, and at the time, that was new to me.

And when it was time for the story's big reveal of it's hero, the big wide shot reserved for a Superman power stance or Batman hunched in the rain, it was with this scene: A weird little creep in a trenchcoat and fedora, with a gas mask barely concealing his startled eyes, shocked by the intrusion of the light that ever so blesses The Superhero Moment, squatting in a dirty bathroom with a hand stretched out menacingly towards the horrified woman, stretching towards you, stretching past the panel borders that should lock this ugly little thing in it's place.

I still think of this image as one of the main signifiers as to what I think sets superheroes and pulp heroes apart. Because at the time, this was a revelation. This costume was a revelation in general.

I was never going to find Spider-Man or Wolverine like this, even their dirtier and less dignified moments were still mired in some form of glory. Even in Spider-Man's lowest points he's still expect to rise above them dramatically or at least suffer them dramatically, when Wolverine prowls in the sewers he does so gleaming with power and ferocity and ripped shirts and immortality. And of course, I was never going to look like, or be like, Spider-Man or Wolverine no matter how hard I worked at it.

But this guy? This is a shitty little bug man caught with it's pants down somewhere it was not supposed to be, as terrified of being caught as we would be to find it prowling around. Painfully humanized, despite it's best efforts. He's dressed in a drab suit with a dorky tie, a disheveled coat, and a gas mask and hat. But the thing about “coolness” is that often the best way to make something genuinely cool is to try to make it uncool to begin with. There's nothing super about this guy, but there's something effortlessly cool about him nonetheless, something that doesn't require a bodybuilder's physique or a model's face, something unlike a superhero but just as cool visually if not more so. Anyone could look like this guy.

I could look like this guy.

And not just visually, the other thing that hooked me into Mystery Theatre was it's characterization. Much like the art, it was different than what I was used to from other comics I read. It dealt with it's drama differently, it's deaths had weight and so did the character's reactions to them. It had gangsters and torturers and serial killers and pedophiles and crooked police officers and none of them were going to get chopped to bits by Wolverine or tied up in streetlights by Batman anytime soon. It didn't have supervillains, it had a mother and son as masked murderers and torturers hiding in plain sight even while mutilating their own families. It had grueling torture scenes and it's female protagonist forcing herself to stare at the mutilated corpse of her best friend just so she can spare her family the pain of doing so. 

Diane Belmont is great and, again, I had never seen a comic book with this kind of story with a female protagonist so strongly at the forefront of it, and with all these other characters getting their side stories in. It was not about the guy in a costume being the center of everything awesome to happen, because there was hardly anything of the sort happening. "Understated" is the key word here for what made Sandman Mystery Theatre special to me at the time.

Wesley Dodds himself is a schlubby, quiet guy in glasses with a pudgy nose and a round face who makes origami and writes poems, who only really has his gun and mask and wits to tackle problems he is not even particularly well-equipped to handle, but goes out there and does anyway. He moves around quietly but still has to escape desperate situations by the skin of his teeth. He doesn't interrogate people in costume by dangling them off rooftops, he threatens to poison their dog if they don't tell him what he needs to know. He sets up little traps with cans and wire to let him know if a cop is approaching his investigation, and he doesn't take down the Tarantula at the end without assistance nor does he linger around to receive any credit for it.

He is not at all an action hero, nothing about this guy even really indicates he's cut out for this life, but he's determined and compelled and tormented by nightmares that don't allow him to refuse the call, so he makes it happen, and throught that, he makes enough of a difference to shift the scales of life and death to those that cannot rely on others to protect them. Those that can't rely on police or family or superheroes to save them. That's when the eerie little nobody in a fedora and gas mask comes in, inadequate as he may be, still desperately trying to do the right thing.

While I did read some of his Golden Age adventures for context's sake, I don't know much of anything about Wesley's other adventures outside of Mystery Theatre or his costumed superhero phase or history with the JSA and DCU and whatnot, and frankly that stuff is so far removed from my enjoyment of Mystery Theatre that it might as well just be a different character (although I will be checking out out of curiosity).

So yes, Mystery Theatre is great, I sing the praises of Matt Wagner often enough and I definitely should look into the rest of Guy Davis's work, but the main thing about it to me is that it was my first contact with pulp in any of it's forms. Sandman was my first Pulp Hero. If nothing else I'll always appreciate the character for that.

[rivalsforlife]

Tell me your thoughts on Kay Faraday

KAY FARADAY love that kid. She's one on the list of characters that I did like my first run through but started liking more and more after going back to the investigations games; before she was still a character I liked but probably lower on the tier of characters I enjoyed but now has become one of my favourites.

I feel like there's a lot of depth to Kay that tends to be easily passed over and quite possibly is something the writers didn't intend; I pretty frequently see her listed as people's least favourite assistant character, and plus, her being in the investigations games which are some of the most obscure ones, fewer people are familiar with her in contrast to say Maya or Trucy. One of the most common complaints about her is her frequent "I'm gonna steal stuff! >:3" attitude that she doesn't actually follow through on; a lot of her dialogue is like that, and I totally get how that could wear people down.

At the same time though... we don't know much about Kay's life between the flashback case and the investigations games, which is kind of an outlier among the other assistants. From what we do know, she lived with her mother's relatives who lived far away, but it's never explained who she's staying with during the investigations games, or where. In addition to that, once she gets amnesia, and presumably is missing for a good portion of the day, nobody ever calls her (despite her having her phone with her, as we see in the Grand Turnabout which takes place immediately after,) and it's not until the afternoon that Karin finally takes her to the place on the business card, despite having found her the night before. That suggests that there's no one out there really looking for this kid.

Her amnesia characterization is also something I find pretty interesting because of how different it is from normal Kay. In other situations like 2-1 with Phoenix's amnesia, even though he had no idea who he was, he still had some subconscious memories (knowing when to object, knowing what to do in the courtroom, etc) and his personality didn't change much. Everything about Kay changes when she gets amnesia right down to the way that she speaks, and she frequently sees herself as a burden, or a horrible person, and is genuinely baffled by the fact that someone believes in her and wants to help her. And she does still have some subconscious memories, as evidenced by the one part where Edgeworth tries to do some word association tests with her:

Edgeworth: Hmm... It seems you have also forgotten the names of objects. This might be helpful for recovering your memories. Just repeat after me. Bookcase.

Kay: ...Broken safe.

Edgeworth: Stained glass.

Kay: ...Stolen goods.

Edgeworth: Books on the law.

Kay: ...Crooks on the lam.

Edgeworth: Statue of the goddess.

Kay: ...Snatched loot of the Great Thief.

Edgeworth: (Are all her mistakes biased towards a certain way...?)

Overall, this does point to an overall trend that somehow for one reason or another Kay subconsciously thinks of herself as a burden on others, and by losing her memories, she loses any reason she has to hide that from other people.

Like I said before, we don't know much about her home life after Byrne died until Investigations, and similarly, we don't know much about her personality. A lot of her personality in the games is based around being a "Great Thief" and a "Hero of Justice", both of which are things she adopts after reading her father's notebook revealing him as part of the Yatagarasu. We have no idea what she was like before that, orphaned and sent to live with distant relatives and without her central "purpose" in life.

My takeaway from all of this is that in the investigations games, Kay is desperately trying to cling onto the persona of her father, or who she thinks her father used to be, to give her purpose and courage in life. AAI2 in particular has the theme of parents and children, and how children can either follow in their parents' footsteps or deviate from them: Miles choosing in the end to live as a prosecutor instead of a defense attorney like his father, though set on the same overall goal; Sebastian opting to stay as a prosecutor, but with different goals than his father; the main antagonist rejecting his father in every way and yet in some ways still ending up just like him. Kay similarly fits into this parallel. She spends the whole game searching for a three-person team just like the original Yatagarasu, but at the end, decides to follow her own path:

Kay: How should I put it...? Until now, I've always been chasing after my father... ...so that I could become a Great Thief, just like him!

Edgeworth: (Like the previous Yatagarasu, I suppose...)

Kay: But... watching you, Mr. Edgeworth, made me think. Maybe, instead of chasing after my father, I should find my own path. ...I mean, you didn't become a defense attorney either.

Edgeworth: (Chasing after a parent's shadow isn't the only path in life for a child, after all...)

Kay: I'm going to aim to be a hero in my own way!

It's a little hard to imagine what Kay's life would be if she isn't a Great Thief, and besides, she's still a kid, and has lots of room to grow and become something completely different than she expects. Unlike the other assistants, the ending of aai2 seems to imply that she may not stay in her chosen career (like Maya going back to Kurain, or Ema continuing her forensic training, or Trucy continuing on as a magician). I think that's a pretty interesting thing I rarely see explored (though of course I definitely don't mind seeing Kay in a Yatagarasu-adjacent position in the future!)

Overall, yeah, I really like Kay, the more I think about her the more interesting things I can come up with. I think a lot of her personality has deeper implications than initially appear on the surface, and it would be super neat to see how she grew up in the post-7yg timeline (... though I doubt I trust capcom to do that in an interesting way haha.)

[gatheringbones]

The complex attitudes with regard to female homosexual relations that were prevalent among sophisticated Harlemites in the 1920s are sometimes reflected in lyrics of the blues. Those songs, which are often satirical or funny, do not deal with bisexuality, perhaps because that affectional preference lent itself less readily to humorous caricature than did blatant lesbianism. Instead, they sometimes present extreme lesbian stereotypes (especially the mannish lesbian image that the term “bulldiker” connoted), which allowed the listener to recognize the situation without introducing subtle complications and to laugh at the in-joke. With the usual goal of titillation, the songs also satirically probed masculine uneasiness about the suspicion that women know how to “do it” better to each other than men do. And they frequently admitted to an ambivalent fascination. In some of these songs the characterization of the lesbian combines images of freakishness with a bravado that is at once laughable and admirable. The lesbian is ridiculed for her illicit and unorthodox sexuality. But she is also an outlaw, which makes her a bit of a culture hero in an oppressed community. In Ma Rainey’s “Prove It on Me Blues” the singer seems to invite jeers: she admits to wearing a collar and a tie, to being “crooked,” to liking “to watch while the women pass by.” But the black audience is forced to identify with her because she and they understand stigmatization. And she is also rescued from being ludicrous because she can toy with the audience. She is the jokester they must, at least grudgingly, admire. She teasingly admits that she means to follow another woman everywhere she goes and that she wants the whole world to know it. But she pretends to dangle ambiguity in front of her listeners: "Went out last night with a crowd of my friends, They must’ve been women, ’cause I don’t like no men…. They say I do it, ain’t nobody caught me, They sure got to prove it on me…." Her message is finally that she doesn’t give a damn what they think and until she is caught in flagrante delicto no one can prove anything about her anyway. But the audience is meant to understand that she does indeed “do it” and to simultaneously laugh at her and cheer her on for her boldness.

Lillian Faderman, Odd Girls and Twilight Lovers: A History of Lesbian Life in Twentieth-Century America

[all-that-is-gold]

My take on an alternate ending

“With my death, so dies the last of the Skywalkers.” Palpatine’s eery voice echoed through the great chamber as he outstretched a bony hand. A surge of force power threw the newly redeemed Ben off his feet across the great hall and into a chasm, hitting the ground on the way down. He grabbed on to the rocks surrounding the opening on the floor, his tired muscles complaining all the way. “You forget… I’m also a Solo.” He huffed as he began to pull himself back up; back to her. The stubbornness that characterized his mother and father flowing through his veins.

-Cut to Rey in the hall

Rey stood up, her head pounding and her vision blurry from the life force Palpatine had sucked from her. Ben. Ben wasn’t there. Where was he? “And now child,” The voice of the long dead rang through the chamber. “Fulfill your destiny.” Palpatine echoed the words of Snoke. “Kill me and take my place on the throne.”

Dozens of Sith whispers can be heard through the hall. Urging Rey to finish it.

“I’m not going to kill you.” Rey told him truthfully. “It isn’t my destiny.”

“But it is mine.” Ben Solo said from behind her. He stood there, chest heaving from exhertion. Ben raised his hand and his uncle’s saber flew to his hand without hesitation, he was finally worthy. He walked towards Rey, her eyes glossy at seeing him alive. He nodded to her and in unison they turned on their lightsabers. The chamber filled with brilliant blue light. They stood side by side, ready to fight till the end.

Palpatine let out a maniacal laugh. “Your coming together, will be your undoing.” He told them as he outstretched his pale hands, lightning crackling out of his fingertips and towards the pair. Without speaking, Rey and Ben tilted their lightsabers to create an ‘x’, effectively blocking the Emperor’s force lightning. It seemed like ages passed with the pair snarling their teeth, gripping the legacy sabers with every strength they had.

“You cannot defeat me! I am all the Sith!” Palpatine laughed.

Rey turned to look at Ben, who seemed to weaken with each surge of lightning coming out of Palpatine’s fingertips. They needed a miracle. And then she remembered. Of course! She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. In and out. “Be with me.” She whispered, hoping to the Maker that they would hear her plea. “Be with me.” She repeated. Ben looked at Rey, confusion and awe etched on his face. He watched as she repeated it a third time, then he understood. “Be with me.” He closed his eyes as he whispered it also.

“Be with me.” They said together.

Suddenly, both of them felt power like they had never felt before flow through them. The legacy of a thousand years of knowledge rested atop their shoulders. Palpatine might be all of the Sith. But they were all of the Jedi.

They took a step forward, one foot after another. Together. No longer Rey and Ben. No longer Light and Dark. They were the balance. Two halves of the same whole. The Light in the Darkness and the Darkness in the Light. The Force flowed freely by them as if they were a conduit for it.

Palpatine hesitated for a second as the pair in front of him seemed to glow from within. Never in his years had he witnessed something so pure in the Force. “What are you?” He asked.

“We are everything.” Ben and Rey said in unison, their voices mixed and amplified by thousands of other voices of the ones that came before them. With one last powerful push of their lightsabers, they turned the Emperor’s lightning on himself. With a scream of agony and shock, the Emperor’s lightning beginning to eat away through him, burning flesh and bone in its path. The Force is too strong amongst the three of them. As the Emperor “explodes” into nothing, Ben and Rey are sent flying off from the power surge. The hall around them collapsing. Each of them thrown in a different direction mirroring the end of the Throne Room Battle seen in The Last Jedi.

-Cut to the Resistance Plot

Ben awakens first. He searches for Rey and sees that she was flung to the other side of what remains of the hall. He gets up clumsily, limping. He falls on his knees, succumbing to his injuries and crawls to reach her. He grabs her gently by her arm, she’s cold to the touch. He turns her motionless body over, only to find her whole side and face littered with dark marks; as if the lightning had etched itself on her skin. Her eyes wide open and lifeless. She wasn’t breathing.

Ben held her close to his chest, looking around to see if anybody could help them. It was just them in the ruins of the great hall. He needed to do something. With a breath, he knew what to do. He cradled her on his lap, holding her head gently with one hand and the other placed on her stomach as she had done with him before, when she gave him a new birth. So would he.

He closed his eyes and concentrated. Focus. Breathe. Just Breathe. With his last remaining energy he passed on his life force onto her. Feeling the warmth slowly leave his body, transferred to her from his palms. She wasn't done yet. The Resistance needed her. The galaxy needed her. Her friends needed her. Nobody needed him after all he had done. It was okay. He was at peace with his decision.

Her palm covered his as she breathed in for the first time. He opened his eyes, relieved that it worked. He helped her sit up gently. “Ben.” She breathed. His face breaking into a grin, crooked teeth and all. She was alive. She gave him an equally radiant smile. She looked down to his lips hesitantly at first and then gave him a passionate kiss. His arms encircling her as she reached up a hand to touch his cheek. They pull back, contemplating everything they had been through. Content with each other being alive. Ben’s face suddenly changes. He feels himself slipping. His smile fades, he looks at her face. Committing every last detail to memory. For this was the last time he was going to see her while he lived.

With a sigh his eyes close and his body falls back, lifeless; as Rey clamors to reach him desperately.

Without letting go of his hand, she brings her ear to his chest and a tear rolls down her face. He is gone. She stays there. Silently crying

-Cut to a background of space, stars.

“Ben.”

“Ben.”

“Ben.”

He opened his eyes slowly. He saw that he was surrounded by stars. He sat up and found himself standing on nothing. Floating it would seem.

“Ben.”

“Ben.”

“Ben.”

Different voices called out his name. All around him, enveloping him. He was tired of hearing voices in his head. “Who are you?” He asked them. What are you, he wanted to ask.

“I‘d hope you would know us by now, kid.” Luke’s force ghost materializes behind him, giving him a soft rueful smile.

“Uncle Luke.” He said tensely. So Ben truly was gone. Then that meant-

“She’s not here.” Luke answered for him, as if reading his mind or his heart. “She’s waiting for you.”

“I’m ready to see her.” Ben said shakily. He had to. She was his mother after all.

“No you’re not.” Luke shook his head gently. “This isn’t over yet, kid.” Ben frowned at this. What did he mean.

“Where are we?” He asked his uncle, who only looked around him.

“Everywhere and yet nowhere.” His uncle answered quizzically as he always did, Ben wanted to roll his eyes. He understood nothing. “We are one with the Force.” Luke outstretched his arms.

“So I did it.” Ben nodded. “I saved her.”

Luke looked at him sadly. His nephew had suffered a great deal at the hands of the man who had abused three generations of his family and now, his final act as a redeemed man was to die saving the woman he loved. Saving the galaxy’s knowledge of the Force in the process. Luke had to admit it that he was a bit impressed at his nephew’s selflessness and proud of him. He wished he could forgive himself for all the wrongs he had done in the past. For not being there for him.

“Yes.” Luke conceded.

“So, no more voices?” Ben pressed.

Luke gave him a rueful smile. One that was etched with mischief Ben hadn’t seen in years. “Not the ones you’re familiar with.” Ben frowned at this.

“You need to bring balance to the Force.” Anakin’s Force ghost appears next to Luke’s. “Both of you.”

“Grandfather.” Ben breathed.

“This is what has to be done.” Anakin tells him.

“I don’t understand.” Ben shakes his head lightly.

“For balance to exist both sides of the Force must coexist.” Came another voice. Obi-Wan Kennobi appearing on the other side of Luke. “Light exists within the Dark and Dark exists within the Light. One incomplete without the other.” He explained. “A dyad.”

Ben stares at them.

“Dead, Kylo Ren is.” The little Master Yoda spoke up as he materialized. “Rise, Ben Solo will.”

Then it dawned on him.

“Everything I did, all of it was wrong.” Ben said sadly and ashamed, referring to half of a life living a lie as Kylo Ren. “It’s too late.”

“Death is not the only way one can be redeemed.” Anakin smirked, placing a hand on Ben’s shoulder. Obi-Wan did the same. Master Yoda extended his hand in front of him. Finally, Luke placed his hand on his nephew’s chest.

“The Force will be with you.” He told him earnestly. As thousands of Jedi appeared behind them. Qui-Gon. Ahsoka. Mace Windu. Luminara. Aayla Secura. Some of them Jedis from other centuries past. “Always.”

And with those words Leia’s body becomes one with the force. Her final act to be transferring her life force to save her son.

-Cut to Rey still resting her head on his chest. Sobbing softly.

Ben takes a sharp intake of breath as he comes back to life. Making Rey jump back, scared and in surprise. He looks at her as she looks at him. Both in disbelief as to what had just happened, but for different reasons.

“You came back.” She whispered to him in awe and confusion as he sat up. Ben breathed, looking at her intently.

“I’ve been told I’m very hard to get rid of.” He told her jokingly. A little bit of Han Solo’s sassiness shining through. She smiled back. They hug tightly, relieved.

-Cut to the celebration. Everything happens as it does in the movie. Rey goes back to the resistance. Celebrates with Finn and Poe. Hugs Chewie.

-Cut to Rey on Tattoine, her hair up in an intricate Alderaanian braid and her new clothes are light grey; almost white. Everything happens as it does in the movie.

She digs the legacy lightsabers in the sand. The final resting place of the Skywalker twins where it all began.

An old lady walks past the Lars moisture farms. “It’s been years since anyone has been in this place.” Rey smiles at her. “Who are you?”

Rey turns to where she landed the Falcon, Ben climbing down the ramp with Chewie and BB8 waiting at the bottom of it.

-Ben is dressed in dark grey, almost black.

Half of her found family.

“Rey Skywalker.” She smiles.

Ben walks up to her, smiling softly.

“Where do you want to go now?” Ben asks her. Coming to stand by her side.

“Somewhere green.” Comes Rey’s answer, a content smile on her face as she takes hold of his hand.

Together they watch as the twin suns of Tattoine disappear down the horizon.

The camera pans out and we see the Skywalker twins looking at them, smiles on their faces.

Peace at last. The balance restored.

[grittyreadsfic]

been seeing underappreciated fic rec lists going around, so here are some of my top fics that deserved more attention, on a list that might have gotten it’s title from a DCOM: gonna let the light shine on me

note: for this fic, i used the criteria that it had under 250 kudos, though the bulk of these fall into the under 150 category, and that they’ve been around for a few weeks at least. 

further and fast and gone after disaster by penaltyboxed

pairing: n/a, gen

summary: Robby had made his agent request the trade instead of asking for it himself.

Something about the idea of verbally admitting how badly he needed to get out of St. Louis kind of killed him inside. He didn’t even care where he went, not really. He just desperately wanted to be out of electric blue and gold, wanted to skate anywhere else, wanted to feel like he actually mattered to a team. Any team. Anywhere in the league that would take a disappointing excuse of a first round pick with ‘injury prone’ tattooed across his forehead. His name was on the fucking Stanley Cup and it just felt so cheap, and evil, in a cosmic sort of way. He was trying to exorcise the chorus of Gloria from his brain for the rest of his life.

So his agent had texted him: What about Detroit? Armstrong and the front office r willing to trade u for a kid named De La Rose.

And then his agent had texted him again: I can get u 1 for 1 but thats probably as good as its gonna be

why i love it: i’ve never loved a gen fic as much i love this one. it’s an absolutely beautiful character study of robby, and is some of the best writing of emotion that i’ve ever encountered. it’s such a perfectly crafted fic, and it made me want to care about the red wings (i team i literally know nothing about)

i’ve never been a natural (all i do is try, try, try) by iwantthemtostay ( @iwantthemtostay​ )

pairing: connor mcdavid/dylan strome

summary:  In June 2015 Dylan gets drafted fourth overall by the Toronto Maple Leafs, in August his boyfriend breaks up with him. In July 2026 said ex signs with the Leafs. In the months that follow they work things out.

why i love it: this author has actually written two of my favorite mcstrome fics ever, and i recced the other one of theirs pretty recently. this fic has some of the best platonic dynamics, which adds such a nice depth to the story and the secondary characters. the pacing of it is absolutely perfect, and it felt like such a realistic way that connor and dylan could have come back together.

we’ve moved on again by stromesquad 

pairing: travis konecny/dylan strome

summary: Dylan isn’t expecting his phone to ring during the second day of the 2023 draft, but it does, and it’s Stan Bowman.

“Hello,” Dylan answers.

“Hi, Dylan. I am calling to let you know you’ve been traded to Philadelphia. Thank you for your hard work and dedication here in Chicago, and we in management and the coaching staff wish you the very best for your future. Chuck Fletcher should be reaching out to you soon.”

why i loved it: i love trade fics, for the narrative, and i love trade fics that are actually trades i wish would happen in the real world. it’s such a great look into how dylan handles it all-the move, the break up, the gradual way he falls for tk, how he makes a home for himself in philly and on the flyers-and the pairing is one i would never have thought of, but now i wish there were so many more fics for them

step out into the wild by jamesvanriemsdick ( @jamesvanriemsdick​ )

pairings: travis konency/nolan patrick

summary: Travis Konecny doesn’t stop talking—Nolan finds he doesn’t mind, though, not when Travis fills up the space where the city’s heartbeat should be, not when he makes Nolan feel so, so alive, like there’s electricity running under his skin instead of just blood and bone and muscle.

why i love it: i was torn between putting a fic from this series or once in twenty life times, but i’m fairly certain i recced that one recently so. technically you could read my essay length comments on any of the fics in this series and you’d get all of my very indepth thoughts on this, but the the tldr is that i’m a sucker for magical realism and a little bit in love with the city of philadelphia, and this fic-the whole series-just does it for me. i love the concept of the heartbeats, of all the different way the city makes its claim known, and nolan’s is my favorite of the three. 

i didn’t have it in myself to go with grace by crookedsilence ( @crooked-silence​ )

pairing: nathan mackinnon/cale makar

summary:  It takes one morning for Cale’s entire life to change. One morning and a wish he didn’t know he made.

why i love it: wishbaby fics are one of my absolute favorite things to read, and this one is an absolutely perfect one. the domesticity, the way it’s so obvious who the second parent is, but cale takes forever to put it together, the complex and messy and conflicting emotions that this kind of situation would create-it’s really got it all and is such a wonderful read

somewhere where the summer lasts all year ‘round by jvrcus

pairing: jamie benn/tyler seguin

summary:  Edmonton was cold, so Tyler goes somewhere warm.

why i love it: ao3 user jvrcus if you see this please know that i looked at your page for a solid 15 minutes trying to decide which fic to puton this list because they’re all perfect. this author is one of my favorite writers when it comes to imagery, and this fic is such a great example of that. this fic is really just a series of moments that feel too intimate to witness, which is what i love in a fic

this feels like falling in love by bageldiscourse

pairing: jt compher/tyson jost/alexander kerfoot

summary: Absence makes the heart grow fonder, right? Alexander would like to believe that, but he couldn’t imagine a fondness stronger than the one he feels every time he’s around them. He couldn’t imagine a world where his heart doesn’t skip a beat every time J.T. smiles, easy and pleased and, underneath it all, a little vulnerable. Or—when Tyson volunteers to help Alexander make brownies, and looks over at Alexander, the bridge of his nose dusted with flour and his hands sticky with chocolate.

When the three of them are driving to practice in the morning, Alexander in the backseat and Tyson and J.T. holding hands and Alexander just—wanting.

why i love it: part why i adore this fic is just the structure, how it’s set up that there’s a fact or anecdote about alexander, and then there’s a way that it relates to jt and tyson. alexander calls the two of them the closest thing to soulmates, but this structure makes it feel like all three of them are just linked somehow, and it’s a very sweet fic

nobody left but us by capsize (copenhagenborn)

pairing: tyson barrie/gabe landeskog

summary: Tyson is traded to the Toronto Maple Leafs in July, and it's fine, really.

It's not like his life is falling apart or anything.

why i love it: again, i love trade fics, and this one is one of my favorites because of it’s characterization of tyson. he spends most of the fic trying to help others, focusing on the issues someone else is experiencing, in order to avoid thinking about his own problems. it leads to some really great parallels in the fic, and the author crafted such  a beautiful, layered, and compelling story because of it

[ncfan-1]

fic meme!

tagged by @anghraine

Name:

ncfan

Most popular multi-chapter fic:

Well, if we’re going by hits or by comments, that’ll be Our Path is Crooked, but True. By kudos, it’s Of Rings and Knighthood and Their Associated Misunderstandings.

Favorite story you’ve written so far:

I would have a hard time saying; I’ve written so many so far, and honestly, I plan to keep on writing fic until I drop dead, so by this time next year, I’ll probably have a new favorite. For right now, that’s probably The Sacred and Profane.

Fic you were nervous to post:

I have tried to leave my nervousness behind me, since it seemed to be that in 2020 of all years, I should really just stop giving a damn if my readers are going to be offended by what I post. I do recall some nervousness regarding Our Path is Crooked, but True, since Ingrid and Edelgard are both divisive characters, and Crimson Flower is a divisive route. But the reception from my readers was so positive that any nervousness I felt evaporated pretty quickly.

How you choose your titles

Ahahaha, don’t call me out like this. It’s usually either a line from a poem, or some phrase I thought was terribly clever, but turned out not to be very clever at all.

Do you outline?

For my multi-chapter fics, sometimes. Like, I will definitely do it if I’m going into the fic knowing that it’s going to be a long one and complex enough that I need written notes to keep track of plot development and character arc developments, but if I know it’s not going to be that long or that complicated, or if I don’t think it’s going to be long and complicated when I get into it (like, Saudade turned out to be 22 chapters and 200,000 words long, but I didn’t think it was going to be anywhere near that long when I started writing it, so I didn’t bother with an outline), I don’t bother.

For oneshots, no. I can’t remember the last time I wrote a oneshot complex enough that I needed written notes to keep hold of everything I need to keep hold of.

Complete fics:

That is not as simple a question as you might think. Fanfiction.net was my first fic writing platform, and there was a lot of stuff that I didn’t bother migrating to AO3 when I migrated to AO3, but there was still a lot of overlap, too. My AO3 fic count as of this date (12/22/2020) is 619. My Fanfiction.net fic count is 1,411.

In progress:

Posted WIPs that I have active plans to continue at this time: On the Ragged Shore. All of the chapters are written, I just have to get off of my ass long enough to finish proofreading them.

Posted WIPs that I have given up on: Alas, Face to Face. I poured so much time and effort into it, but even though I knew it wasn’t likely to get much attention, I still became really, really discouraged by the disconnect between the amount of effort I poured into it, and the amount of attention and feedback it got. This fic is the one that made me start my rule that I wouldn’t post a WIP until I had finished writing all chapters, barring certain circumstances.

Exchange fics due soon/unrevealed: None.

WIPs that live in my fanfic folder and are incomplete and who knows when they’ll be finished:

I have four of those at present.

1. Under Observation, which has an incomplete outline, eight finished chapters, and the ninth chapter in progress. Basically, just watch me write a ridiculously long adaptation of that one episode of TMA where that guy turned out to be full of eyeballs, for my crackship that has two fics on AO3, and watch me wriggle in frustration as the fact that Clara’s dead means that I can only skirt around the edges of my Vast-aligned Clara head canon.

2. In the Hollow of Your Heart, which has a complete timeline and an incomplete outline, and no chapters written. It’s a retelling of the Silver Snow route of Fire Emblem: Three Houses, made to scratch these specific itches: Sylveth written the way I want to see Sylveth written; a version of Silver Snow that properly capitalizes on the apocalyptic feel the route sort of had, but didn’t really fulfill (the godless land! The fall of civilization! They had so much, and didn’t do nearly enough with it); emotionally traumatizing zombies; more focus on the Nabateans, especially Flayn. This one’s going to be daunting, because I have outlined, so far *checks notes* fifty-five chapters, and I’d say there’s probably going to be about another fifteen to twenty of them.

3. Shall These Bones Live?, the Fourth Age Finduilas x Maeglin fic which nobody asked for, but since it’s still my crackotp, I want to write anyways. I’ve got a document with characterization and world-building notes that I’m still working on, no outline, and no chapters written. Of the first three fics on this list, it’s actually the one that took root in my mind first, by the way.

4. A secret project. Basically, I want to write a fic remix of another fic, but I’m still waiting to hear back from the writer of the original fic on whether or not they’ll grant me permission. The only way I could find to contact them that wasn’t a comment section was through the PM function on their Fanfiction.net account, which there’s been no activity on in over a year. Yeah.

Coming soon/not yet started:

None that I can think of.

Do you accept prompts:

Not as such. When Legendarium Ladies April rolls around, I like to do as many of their prompts as I can fit in, but it’s rare for any other prompt events to move me the way this one does, and I don’t accept prompts from individual users.

Upcoming story you are most excited to write:

Shall These Bones Live?, if I can ever finish that notes sheet and start outlining it. Also, if I ever hear back from the writer of the fic I want to remix, I’d be a little nervous to do the remix (I’ve never done a fic remix before), but also excited.

Tagging, if you want to do it: @chidorinnnnn, @qserasera, @avelera, and anyone else who happens to see this.

[tcplnyteens]

Crooked Kingdom by Leigh Bardugo

Six thieves that should now be drowning in riches are welcomed home as fugitives, their coffers empty of the money they were promised. Kaz’s master plan to break into the Ice Court had some minor mishaps but they made it out in mostly one piece, only to arrive back in Ketterdam and realize they’d been set up. With Inej kidnapped by Jan Van Eck and Kuwei Yul Bo still in their possession, Kaz and his crew have become the most wanted people in Ketterdam.  Will Kaz and his crew be able to con themselves out of this one or has dirty hands finally run out of tricks?

–SPOILERS–

So this is my second time reading series and I forgot how much I loved this book despite one very specific part that I know everyone hates *glares at author*. But despite that one moment, this book is full of wonderful things. For example, Jesper’s dad? Colm Fahey is the sweetest man and I love the fact that Nina notices this, she always sees the good in people which is one of the many reasons I love her so much. Also, I feel like now that we’ve gotten to know the characters really well since the first book which makes it easier to read this one. We know their motivations and what drives them even though we’re still getting some bits and pieces of backstory which just adds to the characterization and the overall wonderfulness that makes up this world. One thing that I loved throughout this entire story is the relationships that are developing. For example Kaz and Inej. It’s great, other than the fact that Kaz is a stubborn bastard and won’t let anyone get to close which really pisses me off, but in the end, it all works out. And like Inej’s father said find a boy who knows your favorite flower. Kaz did that in the first book I love that she makes him smile it’s good for him he’s also really defensive of her and it just makes me so happy like, yes. You love her I know you do even if you don’t. And then there’s Nina and Matthias. They’re so fucking adorable I might start barfing up kittens and glitter and rainbows. I love that she’s so shameless, the poor guy gets so flustered it’s adorably hilarious. The part where she says he’s better than waffles and he says not to say things she doesn’t really mean and he called her “my love” I almost cried. Also, Matthias is just so great, I love him. He loves Nina so much and he’s so sweet to her and I love the fact that he’s learning to appreciate the different mechanics of being part of the group and it just improves his character so much. Getting more of his backstory is really important, it makes him seem less cold. Also, we all know how much I love Nina. When she was suffering from parem I was so worried, but now that she has this weird death power she’s learning to use and she’s getting her old spark back it’s so great to see. She also brought up a brigade of fire breathing kittens which is an added bonus. I love the way her mind works. I want to be her. And then she went and added Wylan and Jesper to the mix of relationships and my heart just combusted. They’re so cute. Like Wylan’s first thought when he met Jesper for the first time was that he had the nicest lips. Like what kind of gay shit it that? It’s just perfect. And when Wylan got his face back and Jesper almost dropped his coffee. Ugh, I can’t even describe how impossibly cute that is. And then they finally kissed. I was screeching, they’re so fricken cute. And when Jesper’s dad was talking to Wylan and telling him that he’d be good for Jesper I was so happy because he’s so right, they’re perfect for each other. Then there’s Wylan’s backstory. Jan Van Eck can go die I hate him so much. How could you do that to your son? And your wife? Like the fuck is that? I want to murder Van Eck, have I said that yet? But I got to see the exact moment his life started falling apart all thanks to his wonderful son, that’s almost good enough for me. On a completely different note, Inej and Nina’s friendship is my favorite thing. Girls empowering each other is so important and I love them so much because they’ve both been through so much in different ways and they’ve just created this bond that is so important for their characters. And then I just want to talk about Jesper for a bit. I love him so much, you guys have no idea. He’s such a wonderfully diverse character with a sad but great backstory and I love him, he’s got doubts and character flaws and uses humor to cover up his shortcomings but he evolves so much over the course of these two books. Also, the part when Kaz says he’s missed at the Slat ugh, just knowing how much that would mean to him, broke my little heart. I love this book so much but by far my favorite moment was when Kaz and Inej met up at the harbor and he gave her the boat. Like yes, Kaz. The way into a girls heart is to buy her a boat, ah, true love. And then he got her family?! Like wow, and she wanted him to meet them and he got about as flustered as I think Kaz can get and he was so happy when she laughed. Ugh, I can’t even express how much I love them. It really gave a sense that some good might come into their lives and that there was hope for them and that really helped the book end on a high note. One last thing, As much as I love this book and as brilliant and Leigh is, how could she be stupid enough to kill Matthias? Nobody was supposed to die, it would’ve made the book that much better if he hadn’t. But in the end, things really worked out well, I really loved how they tied up most of these stories and as much as I wanted more, the book ended well. I would highly recommend this book to anyone, the characters just pull you into this world where anything is possible. 10/10.

-maren