#no this is not sponsored or anything lmao i just really like this
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LMAO YES ACTUALLY bc i literally CANNOT stop thinking abt the alnst x orv crossover it's insane
till wants to sponsor ivan so he can help protect the bastard but ivan's been advised by dokja to not take this mysterious constellation that they know nothing about of, so ivan remains sponsorless for most of the scenarios until dokja convinces him to take on hades (technically ivan's adoptive grandfather lmao) as a sponsor
and till's in his lil pocket dimension wondering if he should laugh or cry. the ONE time he wants ivan to pick him and ivan just... DOESNT 😭
— 🌦️
hi 🌦️!!
have u ever considered that ivan will actually exploit his sponsor??
kim dokja is like... nahhhhh its too much for me this is a much better approach *jumps off bridge*
but ivan and his alien... he basically was just there and garnered info
and i think we need a new constellation name for till. secretive plotter is good and all... except till's not really secretive... nor a plotter. i cannot imagine till plotting anything other than his love life, and that's more of a fantasy than anything. rebellious musician or something?
here's what i'm thinking: ivan 100% knows his father(s) are unreliable. he will watch them and follow them to a certain extent, then completely deviate from whatever plots they've got going on. ivan is fine with dying, but does not want to be naked on star stream due to clothes burned off; that sorta deal. (kdj's little dragon lmaooooo)
guys am i changing up my mind i have no idea im not looking at my previous posts cause im scared
anyways y'know... kdj passed up the sponsors because he didn't want to be bound, but he did encourage his companions to choose one actually! guys i haven't touched orv in so long and i'm not touching it anytime soon it's angst paradise.
hades sponsor does sound fun though... hmmmm
idk man i think you would not want your grandparents to watch you stream. the money they give every year is more than welcomed, but watching you streaming..? i think ivan does not have the mental power for that
ANYWAYS guys let there be sponsor x person kdj and yjh narrowly missed that one and i wanna see it. i just wanna see till spending all his probability on ivan, coin after coin, while other constellations are confused. because, well, till has lived many lifetimes and probably gathered coins and probability and whatnot. and it'd be funny.
ivan: my clothes are torn (small rip on sleeve)
till (1): alright buddies, i think ivan would look stunning in this cyberpunk outfit
till (2): are you kidding? this skin-tight motorcycle suit is much better!
till (3): i think the best thing to do is give him one of our shirts!
till (2): !!! will that fit him?
till (4): just give him all of it, guys!
ivan: ???
constellations: ??????? who the fuck buys clothing? just give him an artifact??
guys i think im delusional
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from a Vietnamese ad for Tropicana Twister
#product design#beverage packaging#pepsi co#tropicana#tropicana twister#orange juice#carbonated beverage#splash#fresh#tasty#drink can#Nước Cam ép Twister#aes#no this is not sponsored or anything lmao i just really like this#i want one#frutiger eco
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⨳ ʾ apps/sites 4 shifting . ♡
hi! this will be long but i made a list of apps/sites that might be helpful for your shifting journey. reminder that you don't need these to shift but they can be helpful with manifesting, keeping track of stuff, etc.
enjoy! divider cr
NOT SPONSORED BTW LMAO
﹒ ⊹ 🝮 OO1: NOTION ✩
description:
basically notion is an app for documents and stuff. i have to say this one's relatively known and it's such a huge life saver and i know that probably everyone knows about it already (as they should) but i'm gonna recommend it once again.
useful for:
scripting
dashboards you can add life goals & stuff here you can look up some templates/ideas and see what i mean LOL
cons:
i personally can not think of any major ones because this app is just that good
you do have to make new accounts for the text ai generating feature but i don't know if anyone would use that
additional notes:
i personally love how customizable it is! like you can make each page have a custom icon & header, add widgets, images, and so much more. it is so so so insanely helpful for scripting i'm telling you. or you can just be basic, that works too. there's also a bunch of script templates online including specific ones (like a better cr, fame dr, fantasy dr, fandom-specific drs, bla bla bla) and it's literally the only thing shifttok is good for imo. i'm a big fan of shifterium's templates but there's other people who make them as well and i'm sure you can find some recommendations!
★ ₊ ➲ OO2: CANVA
description:
a website + app where you can design stuff from headers down to presentations, posters, covers, etc..
useful for:
album covers for singer/idol drs
book covers for writer drs or something
fake social media posts but there's better apps out there and i'll list them here as well
and much more!
cons:
a lot of things (most of which i think are the good stuff) are paid but you can find similar replicas if you scroll long enough i guess..?? and there's a free trial but i don't know if that helps
additional notes:
definitely my favorite place to go when i need to design something tbh. there's a bunch of templates you can use and the layout is very easy to navigate through! and it's pretty easy to find free alternatives for the paid stuff you do have in there
₍ⁿ⑅..ⁿ₎ ˇ ⩩ OO3: PARROT ❀
description:
parrot is an app where you can record yourself saying literally anything and play it on a continuous loop
useful for:
affirmations (manifesting??)
cons:
i'm pretty sure it's iOS only
additional notes:
personally i haven't used this app (i don't like my voice so i will not be recording myself saying affirmations thank yew) so i can't give it a rating but from the looks of it and based off of recommendations i've seen it's pretty useful. should be a white icon with a pink circle that has a white parrot in it!
≥≤ ﹕ ⤷ OO4: BEHINDTHENAME ◍
description:
a site where you can generate names & even life stories if you choose it (including height, weight, blood type, birthday, nationality and more i think?? at least it gives those for me). you can choose from different cultures and stuff like fantasy & mythology.
useful for:
finding a name & info for your dr self (which is literally you by the way don't forget that!) and potentially other people you'd like to script in
cons:
it really just helps to make a basic profile of a person so the things you can do with it can be a little limited
additional notes:
i prefer using this site for ocs instead but i think it can definitely help with shifting! oddly enough it also shows like a lifespan & cause of death so.. cool i guess!!!!
✦ ﹕ OO5: SOCIAL MAKER/dummy
description:
social maker & social dummy are both apps where you can replicate almost basically anything from the internet from twitter posts to facebook posts, youtube posts, and more!
useful for:
social media stuff especially useful for fame drs, streamer drs, idol/singer drs and so much more
cons:
both apps were deleted so you have to have had installed them before if you want to get them back
social maker is ios only i think?
additional notes:
yeah both apps are deleted but there's alternatives out there like twinote (for twitter) photonote (for instagram) canva (has fake social media templates as i said lol) and others that you can look for (because i personally only use twinote)
⋆ ᶻᶻ OO6: HELLOFACE ﹒ ★
description:
basically an app for ai face swapping
useful for:
seeing what your face claim (if you have one) would look like on for example dances, fancams, interviews definitely useful for idol/singer/maybe fame drs
cons:
uses ai (i'm personally not a big fan of ai)
pretty underground so the chances that you might not like it are not low
✭ ❒︎ OO7: ROOM PLANNER . ♡
description:
basically what the name says. it's a 3d home designer
useful for:
making your dr room/house
visualizing your dr room/house
cons:
has paid stuff
┊ ‧ ⬭ OO8: COMBYNE
description:
an app where you can combine items you like from a wide selection of stuff to make outfits!
useful for:
making outfits for your dr
visualizing said outfits
additional notes:
there's other things you can do on the app like challenges where you can compete to make the best outfit i think?? looks pretty fun i might try it HAHAHA
yuh so i got a little lazy here at the end & i know this is prolly not very helpful because most of these apps/sites are pretty well known but maybe just maybe.. i helped someone out...
HAPPY SHIFTING!!!!!
#reality shifting#shiftblr#shifting#shifting realities#shifting community#shifters#shifting blog#shifting antis dni#shifting diary#siyzuii
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I watched the Cars trilogy recently and with that came a wave of nostalgia and a strange desire to make my own designs for the cars as humans. Aka taking all the charm out of Cars but scratching the brain itch.
So, no need to drag out the intro any longer, I have some notes written out about em for those who might be interested or just bored.
Lightning McQueen:
I tried to make his suit look as professional as possible, with references pulled straight from McQueen's paint job/stickers, while also keeping in mind that I do intend to draw him more so I didn't want to go too crazy with the design. In a perfect world I would've let my maximalist cravings win, but alas let's keep it digestible for my sanity.
I feel like everyone's kinda on this unspoken agreement that McQueen as a human would pretty much look just like Owen Wilson, and that's the big picture here. I used Wilson as inspiration while tweaking and exaggerating a few things to my preference. (Okay, well not everyone, lmao.)
The chevron markings on the front cut off at the side seams not wrapping around the entire suit as to not clash with the sponsor logo on the back.
Also, he's wearing special gloves to help him grip & have control over the steering wheel. I think sometimes that looks a little weird when his sleeves are down & cuffed, but I just feel like he needs to have the gloves there— especially when he comes out of the top half of the suit. (It's also lowkey supposed to mirror his 4 tires when you consider his shoes are also black.)
So yeah, that's basically all I have to to say regarding Lightning McQueen's page. I feel like a lot of my design choices are self explanatory and, honestly probably shared universally... I mean, he's really cut & dry. (But I love him ⚡︎)
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Mater:
I'm not gonna lie, Mater was a bit challenging for me. I definitely had to step out of my comfort zone but I wanted to stay true to the character and not butcher anything.
My first thought was to give him a fishing pole to substitute for the tow hook— but then the more I was thinking about it, the more that felt so... out of place? Radiator Springs is in Arizona, which is (not entirely, but mostly depicted in the movie as) a desert. And even though there are beautiful bodies of water in Arizona, in the movie I don't recall seeing any prominent ones, at least in relation to Mater. So, scratch that, instead I gave him a lasso, which isn't supposed to entirely substitute for the tow truck— no, he still drives a tow truck, but the lasso is so he can grab people/things similarly to Tow Truck Mater (very cartoony). My explanation for this is the cattle ranch. Yeah, Mater is a tow truck driver but perhaps he has a side hustle, or hobby, if you will.
Also, I didn't want to make him... dirty(??) Like, yeah, of course, Mater would obviously get a bit filthy from time to time, it's just in his nature, but that is NOT going to be the core of my design. In regards to the rust happening on him, I felt like instead I would substitute this with being very tan. Again, Arizona is a desert. Because of this, he would take off his shirt often, and this would substitute for the missing hood like on Tow Truck Mater. The removal of the shirt also reveals just how tan Mater actually is.
It's his uniformed overalls that have his original aqua color, but from years of wear & tear they've been patched up with brown patches, this would also reference the rusting. The one strap is supposed to mimic the one headlight being broken, and I know that's a stretch, believe me, I wanted to do something with his eyes but eyes are not the headlights in the Cars universe..... think about this. Think about it really hard... if you know what the headlights are in the Cars universe then this actually makes perfect sense.
He is taller and wider than McQueen, which is a reference to the literal frame of their vehicle counterparts. (A little hard to picture with these images, but eventually I'll draw them together!)
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That's all I have to say really, but do let me know what you guys think! Gas it up and it might encourage me to make a part 2 with some of the other characters! Who would you like to see next? ♡ Thank you so much for reading & have a great day, Kachow!!
#pixar cars#lightning mcqueen#tow mater#cars movie#cars fandom#cars fanart#pixar#beefycupcakes#rambles n shambles#gijinka#humanization#disney#im kinda embarrassed but oh well ig
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Slutmas Day 6
Stressed & Insecure (Matt)
Request: None
Warnings: Mommy kink, talk of poor mental heath, angsty at first, Matt being insecure, talk of body dysmorphia, friends to lovers, cockwarming, oral, whiny Matt
“You’re such a good boy for letting mommy take care of you like this”
Matt’s pov
Everything sucks right now, I’m so busy with work, it’s taking up all of my time, and everything going on right now backs up to that. I was purely stressed from work originally, which I know might seem easy, but don’t be fooled because it’s not. We’ve had so many meetings for sponsored content, videos, guest appearances, and merch designing, on top of filming for our YouTube and the Podcast. I’m genuinely just drained, my anxiety is high, I can’t sleep, and I’m overall in a bad mood.
I know what you’re thinking, ‘why not just jack off?’ well that’s because I can’t. I guess with being stressed and overwhelmed by everything, my cock just won’t get hard. It probably doesn’t help that my body is constantly getting hated on because of my weight, it makes me really insecure and uncomfortable with myself and my body. I was sitting at my desk doing some more online work and it was pissing me off, I’m so frustrated! I’m just doing so much overthinking and it’s making me stressed, overwhelmed, and insecure.
Just as I threw my notebook across the room there was a small knock and Chris popped his head in. “Matt, are you alright? Do you need anything?” Chris asked, knowing I wasn’t in the best mental state. “I’m fine, I just want to be alone” I sighed back, “Are you still coming to Larray’s house with us tonight?” I completely forgot about that. Chris looked a bit disappointed by my answer but he understood, “Nah I’m just gonna stay here, ‘m stressed and overwhelmed right now so I won’t be any fun” I said before Chris closed the door.
That was my insecurities talking, I always found myself rather boring and unenthusiastic when I’m in these moods. It had been about an hour of trying to get hard and then sitting in my chair with my head in my hands. My door slowly creeped open and I immediately assumed it was Chris or Nick. “Get the fuck out of my room!” I yelled, turning around to be met with my best friends confused face. “I’m sorry, Chris said they were leaving and I should come keep you company because you’re having a bad day. I didn’t mean to make you upset” Y/n said quite nervously. I slammed my fist down on my desk before completely losing it, hot tears rolling down my face.
1 hour earlier
Y/n’s pov
I was at a nail appointment when I got a text message, I was already done with my fingers and in the chair for my toes.
iMessage start at 5:02pm
Chrisizzle🍊
bro are you busy
Y/n/n🪼
i’m getting my toes done rn
why
Chrisizzle🍊
at 5:30 me and nick are going to larray’s for the night
so i wanted to ask you a favor
yk how matt’s been kinda moody lately?
well today he’s really stressed and sad so he’s in a bad mood and i don’t want him to be alone tonight so can you head over afterwards and chill with him?
Y/n/n🪼
you literally just set up a playdate for your child lmao
but yeah i’ll go over there, i’ve missed my matty poo
Chrisizzle🍊
wow but you don’t miss me
that one hurt Y/n/n 🥲
anyways lmk when you get to our house bc we leave in 15
Y/n/n🪼
awe of course i miss you too sizzle 🤍
i’m abt to pay then I’ll head over
Chrisizzle🍊
don’t call me sizzle
*Y/n/n🪼 disliked this message*
iMessage ends at 5:37pm
The message had been from one of my best friends, Chris, he asked if I would go hang with his triplet bother, Matt, for tonight. I know he’s been getting a lot of hate about his attitude/weight and has been down the past 2 or 3 weeks, so I was hoping to cheer him up. I drove directly to the boys house after paying for my nails since I had a bunch of essentials over there and didn’t need anything from home.
I let myself in with my key and walked up to Matt’s room, which groans of frustration could be heard coming from. I lightly knocked before entering his room, as I was reclosing the door Matt yelled. “Get the fuck out of my room!” he said angrily, Matt’s never yelled at me before and he looked so pissed off that I got a little nervous.
I quickly replied with “I’m sorry, Chris said they were leaving and I should come keep you company because you’re having a bad day. I didn’t mean to make you upset” he looked at me for a second before I saw his face change to one of pain, hurt, and anxiety. Matt slammed his fist onto his desk yelling “Fuck!” before choking out into sobs.
His whole body was shaking and he slid out of his chair onto the floor, something he does when he’s really, really upset. I immediately ran over to sit next to him, wrapping my arms around his shaking figure. “I’m sorry! They hate me and I’m sorry!” he blurted out, causing me to be a bit confused as Matt’s hands desperately clung onto my shirt.
“It’s okay Matt, let it all out. You’re safe honey, I’ve got you-“ I was cut off by Matt pulling away from my shirt and basically screamed out in pain. “I don’t know what the fuck I did! Y/n, what’s wrong with me!? A-Am I not good enough!? I’m too skinny, I try to eat more but I can’t gain weight, I fucking hate my body! All I keep doing is disappointing everyone, Y/n I-I don-“ he started spiraling into a panic attack and I was worried, I have never seen Matt this bad before.
I didn’t know what else to do so I pushed past my own anxieties and kissed him. I cupped both of his cheeks and smashed our lips together, Matt was shocked at first so he didn’t kiss back but once he realized what was happening, he kissed back. I pulled away and Matt’s lips tried to chase mine before he opened his eye.
“W-What was that for?” he asked, a bit breathless from his previous breakdown. I suddenly felt shy so I looked down, “I uh- I didn’t know how else to get you to stop talking” I said, nervously playing with my fingers. “Oh, well thanks?” he said in a questioning tone, “Did you mean what you said about your body? Do you really think that?” I softly asked.
Matt groaned and stood up, offering me his hand, “I don’t want to talk about it but yes, I do hate my body” he mumbled as I too stood up. We made our way over to his bed and laid there in silence for a few minutes. I rolled over to my side facing Matt “Have you tried cumming?” I questioned quietly, “What!?” he rolled to face me as well, confused by what I just said.
“You know, because you’re stressed. I think I read somewhere that having an orgasm helps to relieve stress” Matt’s face was now painted red. He rolled over to be flat on his back again, “I’ve tried but I can’t get hard” he exhaled deeply. “Oh… I could try to help if you want” I offered, chewing on my nails, Matt turned to face me again, “Help.. me get… Help me get hard?” he questioned nervously.
We both had blush covering our faces at this point, “Yeah, then I can go chill in Nicks room and you can jerk off” I smiled shyly. “I mean that could work but I don’t want to be naked if you have clothes on” “You don’t have to be naked, you just have to trust me” “I-I trust you, how do we start though?” we conversed. I took a moment to think before asking, “Do you want to make out first, I know I’m like a lot bigger than you so I don’t know if it would be a problem for me to sit on your lap. Is it a problem?” I asked self-consciously as we both sat up.
Matt looked at me with an unamused look, “If that’s your way of making me feel worse about my body, it worked because your body is amazing” he huffed out, avoiding looking at me. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you feel that way” I said with a sad smile, upset that I hurt Matts feelings. “I know you didn’t but my body is like the main reason I cant get hard. I don’t like looking at myself naked, it shows off too much of what’s wrong with me” he replied.
It was silent again for a few minute until I broke the silence again, “I think it’s hot” “What?” Matt looked at me confused. “Your body, I think it’s hot” I smirked, “You think so?” “I know so, don’t you ever notice me staring at you when you’re shirtless or only wearing your boxers?” I teased some more. “I haven’t noticed actually, however, I have noticed you’re not on my lap yet” Matt pouted, pulling me onto his lap.
I was about to say something but was cut off by Matt grabbing the side of my face/neck and pulled me into a sweet kiss that quickly turned needy. I pulled back for a second to catch my breath, “Shit, I’m sorry! I’m just so touch starved and crave physical affection. You were gonna say something?” he panicked. “It’s okay, I know that physical touch is your love language, it’s one of the things I like about you. I forgot what I was going to say but I can tell you I’ll kiss you again” I giggled.
With that, Matt pulled my face to his again and this time the kiss was soft, yet also rough and needy. I had my hands wrapped around Matt’s neck, but his laid awkwardly at his sides, almost as if he’s scared to touch me. I pulled back from the kiss to grab his wrist and mumbled something against his lips. “You can touch me you know” I smirked as I placed Matt’s hands on my waist and went back to kissing him.
Matt’s hands quickly slid down and tightly gripped onto my hips, slowly starting to rock me back and forth. I started feeling his cock get hard and once I could tell he was fully hard, I stopped everything which caused Matt to let out a displeased whine. “Mmh why’d you stop?” he pouted, “Because you’re hard now, which means it’s my queue to leave” I said while trying to get up.
Matt held my hips down and begged, “Please don’t go! I-I don’t think I’ll be able to make myself cum, me being alone with my naked body sounds like a bad dream” he sighed. Piggybacking off what was just said he added, “W-Would you please m-make me feel good? I’ll let you have your way with me as long as it’s not super rough because I’m not in the mood for that” his eyes got a shade or two darker.
“Yeah, I can give you head if you want or you can sit back, relax and enjoy the full sub treatment” “Does the full sub treatment include sex? Because I’ve never been the submissive one before, I uh usually do doggy so my body isn’t seen as much. I’ve never even had a chick ride me before but you being on top sounds really hot, we don’t to have sex by the way, I was just saying if you wanted to I’m down” Matt confessed.
“If you stop talking about sex with other women, you have a deal. I might keep my shirt on though” I replied as I started slowly rocking my hips again. Matt’s grip on my waist tightened and he thrusted his hips up, his hard-on pressing against my clit so nicely that I let out a small, quiet moan. His eyes grew even darker after that, “No you will not. I wanna see your beautiful belly, I just know it’s gonna turn me on so much more” he instructed me.
I blushed and nodded, “Okay then handsome, just lay back and let me do all the work, tonight is all about you” I said, watching him nod before my lips were on his. I slid my tongue across his bottom lip, silently asking for access to his mouth which was quickly granted. He had a bit of trouble giving up control over the kiss at first but once I started trailing my kisses down his throat, he finally gave up on trying to win.
Matt’s pov
After Y/n had dominated the kiss, we made out for a bit before she started kissing down my neck. Once she reached the collar of my shit, she stopped and stood up to unbutton her pants. “If you really want me to make you feel good, take your pants off for me” she said seductively as she pulled off her own baggy jeans. I followed her directions and pulled my sweats off before grabbing her hand and leading her to sit on my lap again.
Y/n sat on my lap again before taking off her shirt, leaving her in a black lacy bra with matching panties. “Fuck… you look so goddamn beautiful” I said while looking into her eyes, my hands running up her thighs. “Mmm, thank you handsome. Can I take your shirt off?” she smiled, placing a short but sweet kiss to my lips, “You can do whatever you want to me” I panted, already being completely whipped for her.
She took my shirt off before whispering in my ear, “You’re such a good boy for letting mommy taking care of you like this” as I helped her get my pants and boxers off. “Such a pretty cock Matty. You gonna let me make you feel good?” Y/n teased, making me squirm a bit. “Please! Please just make me cum!” I pathetically begged as I watched her hand slowly move up and down my cock.
Y/n’s pov
“Anything for my sweet boy. Now tell me what it is that you want baby” I asked softly, loving how fucked out he looked already. “Want your mouth please mommy! Want you to ride me after!” Matt confessed all whiny and desperate, and who was I to deny him that? Without a word, I nodded before bring his tip into my mouth, loving the whimper he let out, “Yeah j-just like that, fuck!” he groaned as I swirled my tongue around his tip.
After teasing Matt a little bit, I decided to fully take him into my mouth, almost immediately deepthroating his cock. “Holy shit mommy! You’re so good at this! I won’t last long!” he cried out, bucking his hips up when I hummed against him. I continued doing this for a few more minutes when I felt Matt start to twitch in my mouth, his lower abdomen contacting as well.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck! I’m gonna cum— shit!” he whimpered as his hips thrusted upward and his left hand came down to hold my head in place. His right hand was pulling at his own hair as he shout a huge load into my mouth, so much that it was literally dripping out of the corners of my mouth. As I came up for air, I wiped the corners of my mouth to clean up the spilled cum and then licked it off.
“Did that feel good Matty? You were such a good boy” I smile as I placed a sweet kiss to his lips. “More! I-I need more! Y/n please, I need you to ride me. I’m so fucking hard still, I need to drain my balls in you” Matt begged me. “So needed aren’t we?” “Yes, please I need you” Matt nearly yelled with tears in his eyes. “Okay, okay, calm down sweet boy. You’ll get what you want, just be patient” I spoke softly as I pulled off my panties and unhooked my bra.
Matts hands immediately went down to my ass, staring up at me with a look of desperation. “Are you gonna be a good boy?” “Very good!” I smiled as I slowly sunk down on his cock, trying to adjust to how long and thick it was. “S-So tight mommy! So f-fucking tight!” Matt whimpered out as I started to move up and down with the help of him. Both of us were moaning quite loudly as I started to move faster, pulling his hair in the process.
“Such a good boy Matty, making mommy feel so good with your big cock!” “W-Want you to cum. Wanna f-fill you up” Matt grunted as he started bucking his hips up into me at a fast pace. We were both very close and with one more thrust that hit my g-spot perfectly, I was cumming on his cock. “Fuck Matt, I’m cumming. Oh god— cum for me baby!” I cried as I rode through my orgasm, starting to slightly overstimulated but wanting Matt to cum.
With a loud whiny growl, Matt came inside of me, this load was equally as big as the one from earlier, instantly dripping down his balls. “Holy shit— I love you, and I’m not just saying that because you gave me the most mind blowing orgasm ever. I genuinely love you Y/n” Matt confess as he started to rub my back. “I love you too Matt, I mean it” I smiled as I placed a soft kiss to his lips “Don’t get off, cockwarm me all night please” he sweetly asked.
I agreed and we got situated so we could lay down, Matt turning off his bedside lamp in the process. “Tomorrow, I’m gonna take you on the best date of your life, but for now, goodnight pretty lady” “Goodnight Matt, I love you” I mumbled into his neck, feeling the sleep take over my body. “I love you too, and thank you for tonight. Now get some rest baby” was the final thing to be said before we drifted off to sleep.
All work is subject to copyright
© Daddyslilchickenfingers2 2023
Do not steal my work
#sturniolo triplets#smut#sturniolo#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo triplet smut#sturniolo x reader#sturniolo smut#sturniolo triplets smut#matt sturniolo#matthew sturniolo smut#matthew sturniolo x you#matthew sturniolo x reader#matt sturniolo x you#matt sturniolo imagine#matt sturniolo smut#matt sturniolo x reader#matthew sturniolo#sturniolo triplets imagine#sturniolos#the sturniolo triplets#slutmas#daddyslilchickenfingers
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Music to My Eyes
Pairings: Finnick Odair x deaf!fem!Reader Word Count: 7.5k words Warnings: Mentions of the Games, so killing and death, mentions of trauma, my attempt at writing sign language, pre-Katniss, no Annie... A/N: Hey, everyone! I watched the Hunger Games a few months ago and had a mini obsession and decided to write for it and only now just got half of my fic done. Since it was running as long as it was, I decided to go ahead and split this into two different parts, but I swear the rest of it is being planned and written. Also A/N: Just FYI, anything written in /slants/ is an indication of something being signed because explaining every little sign just does not work. And, also, Hecton Leary is absolutely done by Peter Capaldi in my mind...just in case you need a visual. I was watching a lot of Doctor Who during this so, get ready to see those intense eyebrows all over the place in this, lmao. Also Also A/N: Special thanks to my beta-reader @killerqueen-ofwillowgreen who I will be crediting more bc I literally forgot to last time and she's too amazing for that! Thanks, Vee! 💖
You don't love wearing dresses—especially not extravagant ones like these, more expensive than likely your entire district as a whole. You also don't love parties like these where you have to wear said dresses, surrounded by tons of people generating body heat and stuffing the room full of perfumes and colognes that make your nose and eyes burn. Your feet hurt from the heels your designer paired with your outfit, and the air is active with words and voices that overwhelm your brain with too much information to take.
Having Hecton beside you is a relief at least—not completely lost in a sea of people as he and you communicate with two rich sponsors from District 1 dressed just a slight less dramatic as you but just as exaggerated.
You watch their lips, painted over with bright colors complementing their attire, as they speak to you. "It must be so hard, isn't it?" the woman asks, spending too much time on "so" as she speaks slowly for you to comprehend. You want to roll your eyes. "Flailing about all the time just to get a few words out?"
The man next to her agrees, nodding his head. You can see his throat shift, and you assume he's hummed a response.
Hecton's hands move with skill as he speaks, partly as aid in translation for you but mostly for the performance people are looking for.
You feel like your lips are going to fall off, you can almost feel them twitching at the ends from how long you've been smiling at all these people who don't know anything about you and assume they know everything.
You widen your smile to show teeth and shake your head, continuing to be as respectful as you can with your social tolerance running low.
Your hands move and, out of the corner of your eye, you can see Hecton speaking as they do. "Not really," he translates. "It's natural for me."
The man puts a hand over his heart and turns to her. "Oh, you poor thing," he says rather dramatically. Hecton doesn't dignify his words by translating that for you—not that you needed it in the first place. His hands remain still, folded in front of him. The man glances toward them, and you can see his brief disappointment at his words not receiving the glory of illustration.
You glance up at Hecton, your smile intact as you slightly squint the corners of your eyes in a silent plea. He answers you gracefully, turning his attention back to the fashionable vultures in front of him.
"This was wonderful," he says, "but I believe our little lady is excited to meet other guests here tonight."
Hecton is an older man with grey hair, pale eyes, and intense brows. Upon looking at him, he isn't the most approachable man. You don't just say no to him—especially as a past victor of the Games who certainly triumphed by a long-shot. He is not weakened by age, but he's definitely wisened by it. Although sobered by surviving the horrors of the Games, it neither slowed nor ruined his life, it simply gave an abrupt end to what little childhood people of Districts like yours can obtain.
One look at the finality on his face and they were fully ready to end their (rather insulting) conversation. They turn to one another, making these awful pity-faces as they hold each other's hands and turn back to heartily agree. "Of course." She puts too much emphasis on the words. "Goodbye, dear."
You nod gently and look toward Hecton for confirmation as he places a hand on your back and turns with you. You both walk away from the conversation gratefully, still smiling for everyone else in the room but moving your hands in silent conversation.
/These people are exhausting,/ you complain, entirely within your right with the way they treat you.
Hecton sighs, looking at you with eyes that understand your struggle. /Just keep them happy./
You nod, remaining light-hearted for both your sakes as you offer a genuine smile before you slip back into a customer service front. /I know, I know./
Lots of eyes are on you tonight, but none so keen as a certain boy across the room. He has basically been watching you all night, intrigued by the way you've been communicating, by the way you draw so much attention without having spoken a single word since you arrived.
He has seen you around a few times—on television, at other parties. He knows your face and that you won the Games like him, but he's never paid enough attention to actually know anything past that. But now, observing you all night, he's interested enough to ask.
His elbow brushes the guy next to him, a victor from another district he doesn't care to specify right now. "Who is that again?" he asks, not taking his eyes off of you as his friend turns to look. "I've seen her a couple times, never remember."
He looks at you and then back at him. "Her?" he gestures vaguely toward you. He nods.
"Victor from District 10, she won the 67th Games." He takes a sip from his drink, leaning back against a table with a hand in his pocket. "Surprised everyone cause she," he shrugged, "can't hear or something."
That definitely caught his attention as he turned full bodied toward him. "Really?"
"Yeah," he swirled his drink around. "She's nice…in a little bunny sort of way." It's not necessarily an insult, more than it is him calling you soft-hearted and skittish.
He walks away without a word, finally making his way toward you to quell his curiosity as he approaches you and takes his sweet time about it.
Your back is turned to him. He briefly wonders the best way to get your attention on the way over, knowing you hate being tapped by the way your shoulders flinch and you strain a smile when you turn.
Then again, no one likes tapping.
When he reaches you, he just folds his hands behind his back and smiles. "Hello," he says simply. Hecton turns at the greeting, prompting you to do the same.
"I'm Finnick. Finnick Odair," he greets with a smile of his own as he regards the both of you. He watches the way the old man's hand moves on his name. Your hand reaches out and interrupts him as you place a gentle palm on top of his. He makes a face—it's not annoyed, just teasing.
You turn back to Finnick, your performance smiling still intact. Hecton speaks while you sign. For a moment, Finnick thinks he'll understand the movements you make—Mags doesn't speak, she has to use her hands to communicate all the time, surely it couldn't be that different—but he is proven wrong when words don't match waves.
"I know who you are. You won the 65th Games, you're from District 4." Finnick thinks, briefly, that your friend's voice doesn't match you at all (which is obvious, of course, but he feels it's worth pointing out).
"Well, then," he responds with a slight chuckle, only glancing for a moment at the way Hecton's hands move as he talks, "I'm flattered you know me. Unfortunately, I couldn't say the same for you…"
You seem surprised by that. He thinks it may have something to do with the way that you haven't had many moments away from conversation since you arrived. Everyone has been too taken by you, too interested in snatching a few minutes.
Your hands don't start moving in that curious way Finnick likes to watch because words are already being spoken. "Mr. Odair, this is Y/N Y/L/N. I am her mentor and translator, Hecton Leary."
Finnick holds out a hand, which each of you shake. Out of courtesy, he doesn't start talking again until after your hands are free. "Wonderful to meet you both. And, please, Finnick is fine. There's no need for formalities when we could be friends, right?"
You still smile as you begin to sign, though your brows furrow. /Why exactly do I want to be your friend?/
Finnick doesn't understand, looking at Hecton for translation. He only says your name, a sort of reprimand as he continues to smile.
/I'm only being honest./
Where you expected frustration from not understanding, you find amusement in Finnick's eyes as his genuine smile widens and he looks between the both of you. "What am I missing?"
Hecton looks at you, raising a large brow and waiting for your reply. You sigh gently and shake your head, remaining civil as you begin to sign.
"Sorry," he speaks for you. "I look forward to establishing friendship with another fellow Victor. Maybe one day we'll…" Hecton gets quiet as he just watches your hands continue to move and your lips continue to smile, full of amusement.
/We'll frolic in the woods together, holding hands and singing songs./
Hecton turns full body to you. He holds his palms apart and brings them together swiftly without clapping them. /Y/N./
You smile wider and hold your hands in surrender, the tiny sound of a giggle slipping out of you. You're otherwise silent as your hands fly. /I'm joking! Tell him it was nice to meet him, and I look forward to being friends./
Hecton eyes you momentarily before relenting, turning back to Finnick with exasperation. "She says it was a pleasure meeting you, and she looks forward to your friendship."
Finnick raises his brows, bowing his head gently. "The pleasure is all mine." He's a charmer, and he makes that clear by reaching out and slowly, softly taking your hand in his (his grasp is so gentle that you could easily take your hand back if you wanted and he wouldn't stop you). He bends forward, pressing his lips to the back of your hand. He straightens his spine and watches you fondly. "Until we meet again."
As he lets go of your hand, he bows his head once more before he walks away. You and Hecton watch him leave. He raises his own brow at you. "Is that blush I see?"
Your hands are quick and exaggerated as you move them. You know he's joking and you're not blushing, but his teasing makes you. /No!/
Hecton's smile is wide and open and you know he's laughing at you, so you call him out for being mean. He drops it just as quickly, once the joke has faded to a funny memory and you both are back to mingling with people who do not care about you.
~
The halls are empty this late in the night. Everyone has retired to their rooms or taken an early train home. It's peaceful, wandering the halls this late and being undisturbed by curious eyes and ears watching you like some wild animal. You enjoy the silence—the physical silence of steady air and only one set of footsteps to track instead of hundreds.
At the end of the hall you wander now is the elevator that takes you to your level. Hecton will be wondering where you are—and if not, it's probably time for you to retire for the night before the victor's interviews with Lucky tomorrow anyway. As you make your way toward it, the lights bright and beckoning, you stop in front of it and click the door button.
It's as the doors are sliding open that you realize you're no longer alone in the dead of this night. You feel it in the prickle of your skin, the change in the weight of the floor beneath you. You look over quickly where the side of your face heats with a new presence.
You see Finnick approaching you, seemingly pleased to see you as he smiles at you, stopping short of the doors to offer you first entry. You grin hesitantly, your confidence from before waning a little with the absence of your mentor and translator. If he tries to talk to you, you're probably going to have a rough night. You press the tenth floor button. He presses the fourth.
Finnick isn't as pessimistic, glancing at you out of the corner of your eyes as you stand with your fingers tangled and your eyes toward the ground. You don't look nearly as cocky this time around—in fact, you seem nervous, refusing to even give him that small, awkward smile you usually receive when stuck in a space next to someone you don't know.
Finnick licks his lips, and speaks before he can correct himself. "Hello," he says, giving you a charming smile before immediately remembering your certain disability.
His curiosity grows when you raise your head, glancing his way but not quite committing.
"Oh, right," he mumbles. His added words spark your attention once more as you finally look at him, moving your hand in a talking motion.
"Yeah," he responds. "How did you know?" You're deaf, but you could tell that he was speaking without even looking at him?
He watches you think for a moment, staring off to try and figure out a way to tell him without Hecton to aid you. You look at him again, raising a hand palm down and shaking it.
"Shaking?" he guesses, raising a confused brow.
You gestured around the elevator, your face etched in concentration, determined to be understood. You sometimes forget how hard communication can actually be for you.
"The room?" he tries. "The room is shaking?"
You make a face, one that says "not quite".
He thinks for a moment, putting your gestures together before it dawns on him. "The air is moving."
You smile, far too happy to have successfully gotten a point across.
Finnick's brows raise, though not in a mocking or upset way. "Is everything really that sensitive for you?"
'It has to be,' you want to say, but you can't. You can read lips, but moving your own to try and copy them is a completely different story. Instead, you just nod and agree.
"I heard that's how you won the Games," he said, before adding on the end with a genuinely impressed smile. "Very cool, by the way." He had spent an embarrassing amount of time—or it would be embarrassing if he actually cared about that—asking party comers about you. Most of the information he got was about the Games, always about the Games. He got the same answers from just about everyone about how you were just so sweet and how it was so inspiring how your lack of hearing helped you to win.
As much as that sweet grin on your face made you want to smile, he wasn't technically right. So you shook your head, and he watched you raise your hands to cover your eyes.
"You were blind?" he wonders, but that doesn't make any sense and he doesn't feel very smart for asking now.
You shake your head and do it again, this time pulling your hands away and then covering your face again.
"You hid," he answers. That makes more sense.
You nod and he hums.
You didn't win the Hunger Games by killing for being killed, you didn't win by joining alliances or traveling in groups and pairs. You won the Games by running and hiding until everyone had killed each other.
When the Gamemakers used their tricks and schemes to flush you out of your hiding places, you found another one to lay low until the end. Yes, there were times when you had to fight for your life, but you were no strong competitor. It was dumb luck that you won. Right up to the end, facing off with the almost-champion after having been hunted down by Mutts. He killed them, and then he tried to kill you.
And that was when your disability was labeled your greatest weapon.
Maybe one day you'll be able to tell him that.
The doors slid open to reveal Finnick's floor. You both linger there in the elevator for a moment, trying to decide what to do from there.
Truly, you should have just waved at him and let the doors close to take you to your own floor. It was late already, you needed to rest.
But…
"Do you like sweets?"
Yes, you do.
You nod, answering his charming smile with a shy one and being upset with yourself in the back of your mind for falling for his obvious charm. If you got hurt, it was on you and no one else. But who cares?
You, you care. Maybe not enough, though.
You follow him off the elevator and into the common room. The kitchen is just off of it, with a long table cleared of dinner but still adorned with snacks—fruits and a few deserts. Finnick slides over a plate of cookies as you take a seat. They're chocolate and very good.
He sits across from you, a little too keen in the way he leans forward. He picks up a cookie between his thumb and forefinger, playing with it absent-mindedly as he speaks.
"Is that," he waves one hand, "usually how you communicate?" He hopes he doesn't sound offensive and takes a bite from his cookie.
You don't seem offended as you shrug. He watches you move your hand like you're grasping a pen, shifting it around in a circle. He understands and, like a dog, goes to grab the supplies for you, dropping his cookie back on the table with little to no regard. He's not necessarily upset about his obedience, if anything, he's happy to let you boss him around—not that you have been—if it means quenching his genuine curiosity with how you operate.
He slides you a notebook as he reclaims his seat, gently slapping a pen on top with a cheeky grin. He seems proud of himself. You hold in your chuckle as you write with the best handwriting you can with the quickness of your scribbles.
/Signing or writing./
Finnick reads it off. He thinks your handwriting is pretty.
"Does it get tiring?" he asks, cookie forgotten in crumbs on the counter. He absent-mindedly pushes it to the side so he can lean closer. "Moving your hands like that all the time?"
His question is one you get often, a repeated question every person asks to suit their shallow interest in you. But you can't bring yourself to be offended or annoyed. Finnick doesn't seem shallow, his curiosity runs deep and his kindness deeper. You're not sure you could take anything he says with offense.
You simply shake your head. /Easy as it is for you to talk,/ you answer honestly, adding the gesture for "speak" at the end to try to be helpful.
He shouldn't be impressed, but he is. "Oh," he says, brows raised in vivid interest. "Is it easy to learn?"
He's full of questions. He knows he probably sounds like a child, piling them on top of each other like tidal waves. But you don't seem upset, so he carries on.
You shrug again.
/Would not know. Depends on person./ You look up at him, and then you add, /You want to learn?/
The way you write is interesting to him. You don't do it in full sentences in an effort to keep it short and simple. But you also don't use contractions, though you try to write as quickly as possible to keep up the feel and consistency of actually speaking.
He smiles slyly and pretends to be shy about it, bowing his head and looking up at you through pretty lashes. "Maybe," he says. "Could you teach me?"
You mirror his expression, bowing your chin toward your chest and smiling at him. /Maybe./
You finish your cookie and rip off the first page to turn to another. He watches you write out the alphabet, quickly scribbling a very poor illustration of a hand gesture underneath each one. It takes a while, longer than you wished for it to.
Finnick doesn't mind. While you're distracted with the activity at hand, he's watching you. You're very pretty, he thinks. With the way you sit to draw, you keep your body open and give yourself the room you need to still see him as you work.
You've got kind eyes. He doesn't think you get that enough. Everyone calls you a sweet girl, but they usually follow it up with something along the lines of "even with her issue".
But Finnick just thinks you're pretty and kind. That's it. No exceptions.
He wants to learn about you without the tainting of word-of-mouth or television programs. He wants to know you. The stuff you love, the stuff you hate, everything that makes you happy, and the stuff that makes you want to throw chairs. He wants to know what your favorite color is, if you like to dance or paint or swim.
Before he can keep daydreaming about whether you like cats or dogs, you look up at him to show off your work. You think it's sloppy. He thinks you did great.
You start going through it with him, showing him the hand signs as you get to them with a patience that amazes him. Once you've gone through the whole of it once, he lifts his own hand to try it out. He looks weird and silly, and you smile as he tries his best.
When he offers a poor attempt at a 'Q', a giggle manages to slip. You probably don't hear it, but Finnick certainly does. His face lights up at the sound. He had heard you make little more than a sigh. Managing to pull a giggle out of you—especially one as pretty as that? It's like winning the lottery.
He goes through it with you a couple more times before he straightens his spine. "So…"
He points to his chest and holds his hand out, slowly moving it to fit the gestures he's tried.
F. I. N. N. I. C. K.
You nod quickly, beaming from ear to ear at how quickly he's picked it up already. You point to yourself and spell your own name out. You move slowly, giving him time to connect each letter to each sign as you go. And when you finish, he spells it himself. A nearly perfect copy, (although perfect may be generous, he's definitely trying and it shows—that's perfect enough in your book).
You carefully tear the page out and set it to the side so he can still see and write excitedly on the next page, your writing almost terrible with how quickly you scribble. /Natural!/
You sign the word after. He copies you, and then tries to spell it out. He gets it right for the most part—even though you're pretty sure you saw him use an 'X' instead of an 'R'.
He really wants to impress you. He doesn't make that subtle, and you're honestly happy he doesn't. It makes you genuinely giddy, the way he's so eager to learn and show off his new skill (a skill he's literally been practicing for no more than ten minutes). You don't realize how far onto the table you've learned. Your hands would brush if you moved them an inch closer.
"I'll keep at it," he replies genuinely at your proud smile. He had no idea someone so silent could be so pleasantly loud. Your ecstatic movements and wide grins compensate for your lack of vocalization. When you speak through your hands or the notebook in front of you, he almost swears he can hear a voice he hasn't heard in place of it, so kind and pretty. Like a song.
You smile too fondly at him, taking in a soft breath before looking down at your hands and sitting back again. You'd gotten ahead of yourself. You don't correct it as much as you should. You're just as fond as you sit correctly in your seat and watch him with intense interest.
After a moment of comfortable silence, you pick up your pen again. He watches you write something down. You turn the book around for him to see.
/Mentor cannot speak?/
"Mags?" he wonders. You nod, tilting your head. "No."
You write again. /Cannot sign?/
"No."
You tilt your head and furrow your brows, a silent inquiry. He shrugs, "Never learned."
You contemplate for a moment, rubbing your neck gently before taking the notepad once more. You show it to him.
/Can teach./ You point to yourself, offering a small grin.
"Really?" he furrows his brow.
You shrug. Why not?
Finnick stares at you a moment, searching your eyes for a joke he knows he won't find. So why would you be so open to helping her? Maybe you're just weird.
His lips curl in a smile. "I'll ask her."
Your own smile grows.
He drums his fingers on the table, watching you watching him. He thinks for a moment, just staring, before he opens his mouth.
"So obviously, you can read lips." You nod. "Were you born deaf?"
You nod and reach for the notepad once again. It takes you a moment to write this time. /Parents did not find out til 2. Was a quiet kid. Did not realize until I never started speaking./
He's so interested in everything you tell him. He hangs onto your every word like pure gold. "So you've never heard anything before? Ever?"
He feels like it's a dumb question. Of course not. But you hesitate, glancing off before you nod.
/Yes./
His eyes go wide with wonder. "How?" He crosses his arms and leans forward on the table.
You thought for another moment, trying to find the best way to phrase it to keep it simple. You tap the pen against your lips and click click click it.
/Before the 67th Games, my team gifted me hearing aids. Thought it would help./ You pull away for him to read, staring at the page before taking it and adding in a new line, /Didn't think I'd make it deaf./
The look on your face told him how much that bothered you—or, at least, a whisper of how much it used to bother you. He thinks you may be used to it by now…
"Seemed to work, huh?" he asks with a slight chuckle in an attempt to brighten your mood again.
But you shake your head as you pull the notepad back. /When Games started, too much. Ripped them out and ran./ You sigh gently, swallowing thickly. /Couldn't handle it./
He listens in, his full attention heeding your words. "So you never wear them?"
You shake your head. /Do not like to./
He nods gently. "Because it hurt?" he asks, trying to understand.
You think for a moment before raising your hand and shaking it like before, meaning a different thing this time. /Kind of,/ you write.
You sigh and raise your hands, loosely clawed in front of you as you bring them into your chest in fists. Then you pick up your pen to translate. /Trust me?/
He nods. "Yeah."
/Sure?/
His second nod is more firm. "Yes."
He watches you grab a hand towel. You lift it up, gesturing to him with it and he nods his approval once again. You step behind him and tie it around his head to cover his eyes.
After you blindfold him, sure that he no longer has sight, you turn off all the lights and spin him around a couple times before you lead him into the living room.
Without his sight, Finnick is reduced to having to let you lead him where you want him. And he trusts you. He sways on his feet for a moment, standing still when you stop guiding him again.
"Can I look now?" he asks, his hands out by his side blindly if not for anything but balance.
He hears your voice, the slight sound of you clearing your throat before humming gently, like you're feeling for it. Then he hears your broken response, unaccustomed to actually speaking.
"N-o," you mumble. He smiles a little, and you think he's weird—in a good way.
After a moment of silence where the both of you just stand there and do nothing, he feels you begin to remove the towel from his face. You don't give him a chance to adjust to the dark, you just flip the closest light on and let him have it.
He winces, shielding his face as the shock sets in. You smile gently as you apologize, rubbing your fist over your chest in a circle. When his eyes adjust to the light once more to look at you, your smile is still a fond apology as you motion to your ears.
He breathes lightly. “That’s what it felt like for you?” You make a “bigger” motion with your hands as you nod. “That’s awful,” he mumbles.
You shrug as you begin to walk back to the dining table to grab your pen and notepad again. As you take a seat on the sofa, you bring your legs up under you and invite him to sit beside you. He watches you write something as you prop the notepad against your thighs. You show it to him when you finish.
/What do you like to do?/
He is happy to answer as he settles back and thinks for a moment before offering his reply. You sit and talk back and forth for a long time. You don’t really keep track as you learn that Finnick loves to swim and he dabbles in cooking when he can. You learn that he likes the color blue, but his favorite color is probably white. You learn that he is a “live life like it’s your last day” type of person because of his experience with the games (a philosophy you have adopted yourself in a smaller intensity). You learn that he’s more fond of the quiet than the rowdy crowds he’s grown accustomed to.
Finnick learns that you also like the water, but you enjoy sitting under the surface and feeling like the world is just as silent as you in a way that isn’t so interesting to the rest of the world. He learns that you don’t have a favorite color but you always say green, that you’re not a people person but everyone thinks you’re a person who loves people, and that you like to watch Hecton play the guitar while he lets you set your hand on the body of it to feel what he plays.
You don’t know when you fall asleep on the couch, laying against the back of it with your head turned toward the large, cushy pillow that supports your head. You’re curled up against it, and Finnick thinks you look precious. He’s not long after you as he dozes off on the couch. Neither of you touch at all, hands to yourself as you let the night ease on around you. But the presence is comfortable enough, you’re happy for it.
But sometime in the night, you don’t know when, how long the passage of time had gotten to be, the calm that had set over you slowly began to fade and slip into something a little more unnerving. Uneasiness sets in your bones, makes you queasy as your fingers twitch. You hum, a groan that slips from between your lips and rouses Finnick as he opens his eyes and glances your way, eyes still heavy with sleep.
He starts to sit up as he sees you shift, your breath quickened and your muscles twitching. He calls your name gently, a first instinct he immediately realizes isn’t going to work. He hears you hum again and begins to reach a hand out. His fingers hardly brush the skin of your arm when your eyes suddenly open. You’re muttering something intelligible to yourself as you glance around frantically, eyes glazed over and movements full of adrenaline.
“Woah, you’re good,” he tries as you grip the cushions on the couch. It’s too warm and it’s cushy and you don’t want to be up there anymore. He’s still trying to ease you, hands out like you’re a frightened animal ready to attack him. You slide off the couch and onto the floor, where the cold hardwood greets your skin as you catch your breath, your face tucked between your arms as your whole body heaves for air.
He lets you stay there, concern written all over his face as he tries to figure out what the issue is. He guesses they’re just nightmares, bad, ugly nightmares that he, himself, has faced over and over and over again. He waits and waits and waits for your body to steady and for your breath to calm, keeping his hands out but away as he waits for you to recover.
When you’ve calmed down again, you lift your head and sit back against the floor, turning toward him with lethargic muscles, your adrenaline already waning as the exhaustion from before trumps everything else. You catch the movement of Finnick’s lips from out of the corner of your eye and turn to see him speak. “What’s wrong?”
You breathe in slowly, filling your whole chest as you gather yourself enough to answer. You stroke a circle over your chest with your fist, a movement he remembers seeing you do earlier when you were apologizing to him. He shakes his head gently, slowly shifting off of the couch to join you on the floor, giving you space as he props his elbow on the cushion.
“S’okay,” he says, his lips moving gently around the word. “What happened?”
You breathe out slowly, still centering yourself. You lean toward the table, sliding the notepad over with lazy movements. You contemplate before writing. /Vibrations./ You show it to him and he tilts his head. /I sleep with my hand on the floor. It lets me know if someone is coming, I can feel the footsteps in the ground. It wakes me up and keeps me out of trouble./
The way you write is different now, filling the missing blanks of words you’d usually leave out because they were unnecessary. Like you’re too tired to summarize, letting the words do their job as you slump against the table like you haven’t slept in ages and are simply going through the motions.
He moves slowly, letting you see what’s happening before it happens as he sets his hand atop your own on the table. You don’t move, glancing at his hand and letting it happen as his skin brushes yours. He feels honored.
“Well,” he says, “you’re safe here.” With me.
You manage to pull the corners of your lips up into a small smile, turning your hand so his rests in your palm. You raise your free hand to your chin. /Thank you./ You take a moment to sit there, looking at each other and enjoying the feelings of your hand in the other’s. Then you pull your hand away regretfully and pick up your pen.
/I should get back to my floor before my people worry./
He reads it off and nods. “Yeah, you’re probably right,” he sighs, already moving to stand to his feet as he holds his hand out to help you, hoping you would accept. When you do, he smiles. You lift yourself to your feet and give him another of your best in this condition.
You pick up the notepad one more time. /Thank you for the sweets. And for the company. I liked talking with you./
He puts a hand to his heart, too heartfelt to be teasing as he dips his head slightly. “My pleasure.”
Finnick walks with you to the elevator, standing by you in silence after the button is pressed as you both wait for the doors to slide open. When they do, you step in and offer yet another warm smile as you sigh and wave, mouthing the word “bye” as you depart from him, sad to go. He mouths the word back to you, though you’re not positive he spoke them as he offers a small wave of his own.
The doors shut and Finnick misses you already.
~
The blaring lights, (otherwise) deafening crowds, and extravagant costumes are something you get used to and never get used to all at once. All the attention is on you, and it's your job to make sure they are entertained as you make your way onto the stage with Hecton's at your side.
Lucky is standing, that unnervingly large grin tearing his face in two as he watches you excitedly. His hand is extended toward you, both to show you off and welcome you in.
"Hello, my dear!" he exclaims theatrically as he takes your hand. He places a kiss to your knuckles and then shakes Hecton's hand as well. You all take your seats, your smile the picture of thrilled.
"It's been a while since we have last spoken, hasn't it?" He stops dramatically and then says, "Well, a while since I spoke to you, at least." The air is on the fritz with cheers and laughter and more clapping as you look around at everyone. Lucky's laughter is just as wide. "How have you been, Y/N?"
You look at Hecton, your smile and his set in perfection. He speaks as you sign, beginning his role as your ultimate translator. "I've been great, Lucky. I've missed you!"
His big brows furrow as he slaps a hand over his heart. He turns to the adoring fans. "Oh, isn't that sweet?" He laughs again and looks back at you, his expression calmer but no less dramatic. "I have also missed you, my dear. Now, tell me, this is a tour for some of our previous victors, have you met any of them yet?" He leans in like you're sharing a secret.
"I'm glad you asked, I have. It's been great getting to be reacquainted with old friends and making new ones."
"Ooo," he says, looking around and encouraging the crowd to join in. "New ones like who?" He sits up straight and brings a finger to his lips, glancing away and smiling slyly. "I know I have it from a reliable source that you were mingling with District 4 Champion, Finnick Odair." He leans forward with narrowed eyes. "Do I sense something blossoming?"
He and the crowd tease you, making lovey dovey noises that you don't hear but definitely feel as you glance at Hecton and he raises his thick brows in amusement.
"Oh, Lucky," you smile like you'll laugh as Hecton continues to read your hands. "I wish I could agree, but who am I to say?" You shrug it off with a sigh.
"Oh, really?" he jabs. "Because when I brought it up with Finnick, I believe he described you as 'a special kind of beauty'." This riles the crowd up even more, they cheer louder and the air feels suffocating. You smile through it.
"Did he now?"
"He did."
Lucky laughs dramatically, Hecton laughs less dramatically, and the crowd eats right out of the palm of your hands.
"Well," Hecton says as you catch the attention again, "you know I'm not one to gossip."
"Ohh, not just this once?" He says it like he'll cry.
"I wish I could."
He sighs heavily. "Oh, well." The crowds 'aww's and you give an apologetic smile to them all. Lucky leans over and takes your hand in his, which you then cover with your own. "It has been lovely catching up with you, my dear. And you, too, Hecton, my friend." Hecton nods. "I hope to see you again soon, both of you—I do so love our talks!"
"As do I, Lucky. As do I."
He puts both hands over his chest this time, smiling with sadness to see you go. "Would you give us a kiss before you go?"
You stand to face the crowd and kiss your hand, blowing it out to them as they scream and shout for you. You beam and look at them all, waving happily.
"Oh, fantastic!" Lucky exclaims as he stands to join your side, Hecton at the other. He takes one of your hands again. "It is always a pleasure."
"The pleasure is all mine."
He turns to the adoring audience. "Our Silent Spectacle, everybody!"
They scream and shout and you press your cheeks to Lucky's before you and Hecton leave the stage. Even after you're past the curtain where they can no longer see you, you keep the smile as wide as you can until it trembles out of place.
/Very well done, Y/N,/ Hecton congratulates.
You huff out a tiring breath, massaging your cheeks before regaining your posture and masking your frown with a much softer smile as you respond. /It's exhausting./
He offers a sympathetic look. /Maybe so, but they love it./ He glances at you again, noticing the fatigue in your eyes and your twitching lips, the nerves kicking from overuse. He sighs, taking your hand and turning you to him.
/You've got to keep them happy./
You look at him, how his words reflected a deeper worry, a double meaning that surpasses the gratification of your adoring crowds. Your eyes glue to his own, solemn, sober—a fair contrast from the faces surrounding you, drunk on the sap of their own self-importance.
/I know,/ you nod.
The tense moment is interrupted as a new player enters the arena. Hecton is the one to turn first, redirecting your attention toward the person approaching you. You immediately smile, an instinct by this point as you turn your gaze on your next audience. It only takes a moment for you to recognize the person, and your smile comes a little easier.
Seeing the situation before he approaches, Finnick wonders whether or not it would be appropriate to interrupt. But when your mentor turns and you turn with him, and you smile a more genuine smile upon seeing him, he finds that he doesn't really care if it's appropriate right now.
"You're quite the personality," he says as he steps up, smiling himself as he tilts his head.
"They love quiet, happy girls," Hecton translates as you sign. Finnick really doesn't think his voice suits you, coarse and thick with an accent hard to find.
"That, they do," he nods. He licks his bottom lip, "So you'll be headed back off today?"
You turn toward Hecton, your jaw clenching briefly before you turn back. "Soon. I've got some business tonight and then we'll be off tomorrow."
"Business?" he raises a curious brow, taking a small step forward as his lips quirked. "What kind of business?"
You tilt your chin, a nervous kind of smile on your lips as you move a hooked finger from your nose to your cupped hand. "Nosey," you tease, though Hecton speaks it flatly.
"Oh, it's a secret?" he wonders, even more curious now. He doesn't speak like a creep as he continues, holding that same teasing feeling while also offering his genuine curiosity. "I have a thing for secrets, y'know. I can keep it safe for you…"
You do it again, with a little more delight this time. Again, Hecton's translation holds no ounce of the delight you give off as you talk to Finnick. "Nosey," he repeats, this time with a little more sternness to get him to stop asking. You give him a side glance, but he isn't affected.
Before you can communicate anything else, Hecton's sets his hand on your lower back. It isn't patronizing, he's just used to guiding you, your protector.
"Come now, Y/N," he says. "It's time we were off."
You sigh gently but nod, still smiling as you glanced up at him. You begin to wave to Finnick, but he speaks as you're waving your hand.
"Am I free to visit down in District 10?" he asks, his tone light and playful to avoid sounding as hopeful as he feels. He's just met you, and he wants to know you.
You nod quickly, too eager. You move two fingers over your fist, missing the way Hecton doesn't translate. But Finnick can figure that one out himself.
His chest floods with relief. "I'll keep it in mind."
You wave. /Goodbye, Finnick./ The way you sign his name is different. Where he is expecting to see the familiar letters you showed him last night, he finds a wave of your hands and a fond smile.
He winks at you. "Goodbye, sweetcheeks."
You scrunch your nose, circling your hand over your belly. /Gross./
Hecton is already walking you away as Finnick blows you a cheesy kiss, mirroring the one you'd done for the audience earlier. You wave him off, smiling and shaking your head as you go.
When you're far enough from him, walking away from backstage to wherever you were headed now, Hecton's intense brows are furrowed in what you can only assume is annoyance at his distrust in Finnick.
/You seemed familiar./
/Stop./
Music to My Eyes taglist: ... This is a temporary taglist for those who want to be tagged in the sequel to Music to My Eyes, Finnick Odair x Reader. Please keep in mind that once the second part is posted, the tag will disappear. Feel free to DM, comment, or send me an ask to be added, if you would like. Or simply add yourself here...
#finnick odair#finnick odair x reader#finnick odair x you#finnick odair x fem!reader#finnick odair fanfic#finnick odair fanfiction#fanfic#fanfiction#the hunger games#the hunger games fanfic#the hunger games fanfiction#finnick odair fluff#reader insert#female reader#deaf reader
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So I’ve sent a few asks about this since i'm not a challengers blog lmao but i feel like ive got this sorted now. This is a polycule au where reader enters via Tashi.
Reader is Tashi’s childhood best friend. They met at a day camp for kids in the neighborhood, and you were excited to let her babble on about tennis and sports and everything else. You traded hair ties and discovered you have the same favorite movie and that was that.
You were interested in tennis for a bit, an eager little kid, really just excited to have a best friend. Your parents were a bit concerned - don't you want other friends? She seems a little... overbearing... - but you didn’t care. This wasn’t just another kid - this was Tashi. Fire and ice, determination and grit, strength and beauty... You didn’t realize you were falling in love, you were just a kid. But that first love - when given the opportunity - can grow into its own beast. Spin the bottle might have been the first kiss you two share (and your first kiss ever), and it probably should have hurt your feelings more when she told you you were a terrible kisser later that night, but she offered to teach you and you tried to ignore the way your mouth went dry at the thought of tasting her again.
But despite your best efforts, as you drift away from tennis and into the pageant circuit, you and Tashi drift apart too. She still drags you out to do doubles for fun, but you can tell it bothers her that you aren’t as passionate about it as she is. It was her idea to write letters in college - she was flopped out on your bed, looking like a goddess in her tiny pajama shorts. She said it was convenient, you couldn’t help the way your heart skipped a beat. You’d been scared that she might just leave you - find a friend with a passion and drive that matched hers. But she wanted you around. Even tried to set you up with Art one time, the four of you crammed in a booth at some shitty diner. You decided then that you hated both boys - you’d heard their names in her letters, tried to ignore the way jealousy coiled in your chest every time they looked at her.
After her injury though... she just drifted away. By the time Lily was born, she rarely wrote back, to your texts or emails. It was too hard - you understood tennis as a game, but not in the way she did. Besides, you were solidly from before. Before the injury, before the marriage, before any of it. In her mind, you were pure. She couldn’t taint that with her pain and loss. You tried reaching out to Art, but he brushed you off. You ran into Patrick a few years later, at a shitty hotel. You’d almost kissed him - the heat of the moment and the history making desire twist with guilt in your stomach and you’d practically ran from the bar.
But that didn’t mean you stopped writing. And that made everything worse - why couldn’t you be more like Patrick, take a hint, let her go, let her slip fully into her after. But you never forgot a birthday - an ever growing collection of cards and letters in a box under her bed. You’d wondered, sometimes, if she read them. The letters got shorter and shorter as your own life drifted away from you. Empty friendships, empty relationships... it should have alarmed you, the way your life became grey without her.
After the Challenger, when Patrick was back in their life, he was looking for something of Art’s when he found that shoebox under her bed. The last few letters are unopened - you’d stopped including any details of interest by now, and she couldn’t bear to read the nothingness. You used to fill pages - now you barely covered the front of one.
But despite late night conversations while Tashi was getting ready for bed, neither Patrick nor Art ever felt like it was their place to say anything. Patrick would poke and prod, but never actually did anything.
It would be another year of radio silence before fate intervened. At this point in your life, you were working as a personal assistant for some big-wig sports sponsor, an overbearing man with wandering hands - but he pays you well, and your contract has a year or so left in it anyways.
The party had barely started when someone taps you on your shoulder. You’d been flitting around in a blush gown, debriefing the staff and restocking tables. You spin, expecting another waiter with a question, but Art’s blue eyes widened as they met yours. He hadn’t recognized you from behind - looking for answers about where to put their coats, but now you were both staring, brains whirring, trying to think of what to say. And you can’t stop yourself from scanning the room, a million questions swirling in your mind. Is she here? Did she know I was here? Eventually, you and Art are able to get through the awkward conversation, as you try to keep your eyes from traveling the entirety of his form - older, but still muscled, and the crows feet around his eyes only served to increase his attractiveness.
You’d flit away again, your heart pounding in your chest. You still hadn’t seen Tashi - was she even here? It would be a few hours before Patrick would confront you at the bar. You’d finally gotten away from your boss, throwing back a shot surreptitiously.
“Is he always like that?” He asked, leaning back against the bar, up in your space the way he’d been all those years ago.
“Hmm?” Was all you could manage, the shock and the alcohol making your mind move slower than normal.
“Your boss. Is he always so touchy?” You don’t answer that, putting your shot glass back on the bar and flitting away again.You’d hosted a thousand parties with your boss - why are they here now?
It was almost midnight by the time you finally see Tashi - you’d been washing your hands in the women's bathroom when she came out of the stall behind you and you both froze. Your brain was running a mile a minute, you weren’t even sure if you were breathing, all those feelings from decades ago coming up your throat.
“It’s good to see you.” Was all she said before slipping out of the bathroom. You find yourself leaning heavily against the sink, just trying to catch your breath.
Tashi would say that it was seeing you with your boss that pushed her over the edge into bringing you back into her life. But both Patrick and Art know that it wouldn’t have mattered if she had seen you with your shitty boss, happily married with kids, or in the height of your career. One look at you was enough.
aw, this one HURT what the hell ☹️☹️☹️☹️ the continued letters :((((( them slowly getting more and more lifeless the more that times passes and the more listless she becomes :(((( i imagine she stops hoping for tashi's reply, probably stops thinking tashi reads them at all - just vents like its a diary - she could buy an actual diary but something about the letters and knowing where they'll end up gives you comfort. you talk about failed dates and how you dont feel like you're built for love, dont think its meant for you. think you're probably always meant to doll it out and not receive it and how its okay and you accept it and you dont resent her for leaving - especially after her injury, you get it - except sometimes you get angry and your letters have tear stains on them with blurred ink lines and you write about how you understand how hurt and devastated tashi must have been and still must be, but why couldn't she let you be there for her? why weren't you enough? why did she accept love from art years later but never sends a letter back to you? why does he get grace from that time in your life, but you dont? what did you do to deserve it?
those are the letters tashi almost replies to - the angry ones - she gets as far as putting a pen to paper but can never find the words to explain how the reminder of you, after her injury, was just too much to bear - all her passion and ferocity and girlish zeal were wrapped up tightly and bound to you - even though you didn't play tennis - you reminded her of everything playing tennis used to make her feel. euphoric. how can she explain thinking of you made her sick to her stomach and by the time she'd gotten to a place where she could stand on her own two feet again. allow love back into her life through art - that she'd simply felt the weight of her cruelty too intensely. she couldn't apologize. she couldn't bear seeing the betrayal in your eyes, the hurt, the wound she'd caused. tashi was tough - but not when it came to you. you'd rip her right open. so she never replied. and eventually, it became too much to read them too.
and art probably knows about you - it's kind of hard not to notice his wife getting letters continuously. he asks about them, and tashi tells them they're from you and arts thinks 'oh.' he feels bad for you, he remembers you - remembers that time tashi tried to set you on a double date and it went miserably because art was too much of a loser back then to know how to treat a woman - and he'd still been very much in love with tashi. you'd been sweet, though. down to earth, kind, funny. he could tell you and tashi adored eachother. he doesn't read any of your letters, but he sees the expression on tashi's face kind of - shrink whenever she gets one - and he recommends only once, "why dont you return it?" but the glare she'd sent him had been enough that he'd never brought it up again. he wanted to ask more about you. had an inkling there was something more there under the surface - something romantic even, but he never knew how to go about asking. you were a touchy subject. it made him endlessly curious, despite himself.
and patrick - patrick probably hurt the worst. tashi marrying art - not being invited to the wedding - it'd hurt, badly. you'd written her many letters about just how much it hurt - but with patrick. it felt like a slap to the face. you and patrick - you felt a kinship with him. you hadn't bonded until well after college, not until years later, when you ran into him one night at a local bar. but catching up with him felt as easy as breathing, and like you'd known him all your life. he was self-deprecating and annoyingly flirtatious and haunted. he asked you about a tattoo you had on your wrist with a finger skimming the mark there and you'd breathed in. and that was it. you spent hours talking about tashi, spooling your guts out - and he did the same. you realized you had a connection there - you'd never been around patrick much when he dated tashi but you could tell he still loved her. just like you did. art too, though you didn't know the man well enough to mourn his absence from your life, other than to be stung that he apparently was more deserving of tashi than you were.
you'd almost went home with him - you could tell he wanted to. and the shared pain you felt drew you to him, you couldn't lie. patrick zweig was attractive and and you knew a night with him would treat you well. he'd make you cum - many times, probably. but the thing that stopped you was the very reason you were called to do it in the first place. god, was everything in your life about tashi? every goddamn thing? even your hookups? patrick wanted you, he definitely thought you were hot, but the peak of his desire came from wanting to have something of tashi's. to be closer to her - or to back at her. he'd make you cum, but it wouldn't be about you, or even for you. you couldn’t even be mad at him for wanting it - because for a moment, you wanted it too. to have something of tashi's - both to be closer to her and to spite her. but that's not who you were, at the end of the day.
you just didn't have it in you to play games.
patrick didn't take it hard. just gave you a half crooked smile and gave you his number if you ever changed your mind. the paper sat folded up in a pocket in your wallet for years to come. never used, but never tossed out.
it would be a few years later - working on an event for your gross boss that you saw the match on screen. catching snatches of it between your rounds of attending to guests, before tuning in fully on your break. breathless and nearly nose pressed to the screen as you watched all three of them come together in the most beautiful match of tennis you'd ever seen in your life. watching art and patrick embrace across the net made your eyes burn. when you saw tashi smile you turned the TV off.
a week later patrick was in the news, pictures of him seen with tashi and art on every article online. you couldn’t escape from their image - pictures of the three of them at a dinner - coming out of the movies. one of tashi and patrick seen laughing at a premiere. another of art and patrick relaxing on beach chairs.
it felt like being stabbed in the chest. the connection you felt with patrick severed. you didn't share anything. he was still chosen, in the end, when you weren't. you threw his number out. crumpled and barely eligible anyway.
you stop writing tashi after that. you doubt she'd notice. it was time you stopped being pathetic and let go. she probably threw the letters away the second she got them. art probably thought you were a nuisance. patrick probably thought you were a joke.
you move through life on autopilot for some time. you tune out news about anything related to tennis. you throw yourself into your job - that you hate. but what can you do? it puts food on the table and a roof over your head and yeah your boss gets handsy and makes inappropriate comments but its worth it kind of because he pays you extra and that means you get to buy the fancy ramen. the kind with actual beef tips in it.
its just any other night, refilling guests drinks - managing the bar when it's unattended - flitting around to see if anyone needed anything. your outfit was bordering on inappropriate - akin to that of a maid - black and white and shorter than necessary, especially for a high brow event such as this. but it was what your boss made all the women wear, so you couldn't complain. and yeah, maybe your skirt was shorter than anyone elses but if you just were conscious enough of your surroundings and keeping the hem from raising, it was manageable.
seeing art is like a bucket of ice being dumped on your head. turning around to see his startled expression feels almost comical. his suit and tie in comparison to your near slutty get up is humiliating beyond belief but you simply paste a smile on your face and pretend like seeing him and what it means that hes here hasn't just made your brain short circuit - you act like he's any other guest. pluck his coat from his arm and tell him if he needs anything to please let you know. you hope he doesn't. you hope he leaves you the hell alone.
if seeing art was ice seeing patrick at the bar feels like being tossed into a fireplace. you feel your skin heat just from him being close. your nose twitches at his comment - patrick was always more perceptive than people gave him credit for - but you didn't want to linger around to entertain him. if he thought he could just talk to you like he did the last time you two talked - like he hadn't spit in your face - he was wrong.
and if seeing patrick was like being thrown in a pit of fire seeing tashi in the bathroom was like being shot through the heart. a bullet entering your sternum. breaking all your bones that'd been paper thin anyway and tearing apart all your lungs and viens and cartilage. beautiful as the day you'd last seen her. somehow even more gorgeous with time and in the flesh. her beauty could never be captured completely by a camera or on a screen, though. it was the kind that shone best in person. because she glowed. she was effervescent. you wanted to die.
"its good to see you."
its good to see you.
over and over again in your head long after the door swings shut behind her. its good to see you like there wasn't a decade of unaccounted time between you. its good to see you like there weren't a thousand unanswered letters between you. its good to see you like you were passing acquaintances. nothing more.
you wash your hands in the sink three times. you fix your skirt, though it does absolutely nothing to do so. you go back outside and you deliberately avoid their table and when your boss pulls you to the side and slides a hand down your arm and tells you, you look like you need a break - you look at him and you know you can do what you usually do, which is act stupid and say no thank you or simply act like you dont know what he wants from you until he gets bored. but then you feel the empty pit in your chest that the bullet left ravaged, and you know you need something to fill it. even if that something will make you hate yourself.
you dont beat around the bush.
"can you take me home after work?"
your boss grins. you smile back, it feels wooden on your face.
"sure i can, sweetheart."
#ask#i LOOOOOOVE when y'all send me asks like this like yesssss i wanna read your concepts ur own au ideas#just yapping ur thoughts and im listening ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️#and i love angst i love broken hearted reader i love polycule i love drama#best friend!au
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Ok I haven't seen any phandom posts about it yet which is suprising but. The whole Watcher situation has got me... um idk grateful yet also scared as a dnp fan. I'm happy and thankful that dan and phil seem to really listen and care about what their audience wants, and seems to respect us as an entity. I have seen people recently criticize them for the number of sponsored videos they have, and ig if you don't like ads then yeah, that's a perfectly valid reason to not watch ad-centric videos (coming from someone who does not mind them at all, as they still find ways to make it entertaining, ex. Dans nord fanfic and bants throughout all of the dragon city stuff). But with that said, I think it's important to recognize than monetizing their videos, having sponsors, YouTube memberships (in Phil's case at least) and merch is how they generate an income. Like yes ads may be annoying, but they do have a livelihood to sustain (not to dismiss the fact that they are certainly well off now, and enjoy an extravagant lifestyle. but isn't that ok? Shouldn't they be allowed to buy an expensive gadgety house and overpriced clothes? People with high yearly salaries do. Wouldnt you?). I guess my point is that, while you may have qualms with ads and sponsorships, it's nice to have the content still free on YouTube. And I guess I fear that if they get sick doing spons or whatever, they would do something like Watcher (putting their stuff behind a paywall). I mean, I don't think they would do it, but that whole fiasco just put it in my mind as a possibility. Now, honestly, I don't think they're generating enough views to even consider anything like that for the near future, so really there's nothing to worry about. Anyway, all that to say, sponsors aren't bad if they allow the creators to make the kind of content they want, and are beneficial for us as an audience bc we don't have to pay for shit if we don't wanna lmao. That's all rant done !
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say what you want about dnp play the sims but they play that game with nothing but love in their hearts. they used to keep it pretty pg-13 knowing their audience (but I also think that’s just how they enjoy the game lol) while some could argue they’ve allowed more chaos post hiatus with the gays and fuck bushes they still have EA sponsoring them and clutched their pearls at that pool straddle (more so the fact that they never got over getting ad struck for that lmao) and for that reason I don’t think they would download wicked whims or do anything really crazy bc they’re here for the STORY but can’t say I relate. one summer i bought the sims 4 on sale for like $5 and all I have is a MacBook Air that can’t handle 5 google chrome tabs being open much less an actual game but every 6 months I open it, make a sim that vaguely resembles whatever celebrity or person I’m feeling in the moment, download an entire house already made off of the gallery and make them woohoo with the first person they meet as my laptop slowly begins to burn whatever surface it’s on and produce noises that sound like a plane taking off
#absolute debauchery#I think I would play it better and more for fun and story if I had a pc that could actually run it with expansion packs and stuff#one day I’ll get a cheap one#no one needed to know this but just some thoughts spurred from rewatching old sims videos lmao#dnp#dnpgames#the sims#blossoms.txt
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The Sides Are Dorks, Part 389534
I was wondering why the Sanders Sides tag was trending earlier, and then I saw. the Video. Anyway, here's my thoughts while watching the new vid (in list format) bc I haven't done this in a while.
[it's gonna be LONG knowing me]
"I would never be caught dead in a bowtie" *cuts to when Janus literally wore a bowtie in canon*
"yeah and I deserve it" -> ha mood
"Wrong, I ate an entire bottle of melatonin gummies" -> Patton. Patton, no.
"I could switch to green tea, and I'll still be a bitch!" -> also mood
hey. hey why you do that. why would you say that. (aka: Roman is offended by the mustache comparison)
"Where is my ruler" -> PLEASE it'd be so fucking funny
Virgil really be like "WRONG! I use the tildas you faker" (/j) (/lh)
Patton starts listing off every appliance that has heat stuff and I cannot. I CANNOT--
^and then there's the fridge. what did Fridge ever do to you? where's the lorreee
"wholesome friendship" // "how many holes we talkin'" -> yeah that makes sense
"No, he's just not worth an attack" -> Logan sounds like he's thought about this before
Roman Unscrews Imaginary Lightbulb, reaction is a family-friendly version of "Listen here, you little shit"
"get him" -> Virgil hates that Anxiety so much
Emile Picani Joins the Ranks of Rat Man by Sleeping in the Buff. it's canon now.
"It's no one's business what bites me" -> Janus. Janus, the implications. Janus--
Patton reveals Logan's secret: Love for Donuts, feat. wiggly fingers
"Which is rude...because I am not young" -> also Sheldon is missing The Tie, which is essential for Serious Smart People (I guess)
Roman likes My Little Pony
"No, I didn't--" // "He did!" // "He definitely did." -> LMAO the Others confirming that Virgil had a meme phase
Ah yes: The Sponsor Section
Patton being like "some cookies are bad??" is funny to me lol
"--vaccuums" // "No" // "ignore that last one" -> goddamnit Patton (/pos)
"There sneaky people out there" *cuts to Janus*
Roman loves Barbie movies. Barbie Movie? whatever, he likes Barbie
"war against the evil cookies" // "wait--" -> haha. this is why I believe in Intruality so much
"I dropped another laptop in the toliet" -> another one?
conclusion: Patton and Remus are both accident-prone. an Intruality win. also they interacted for like, 2 seconds. another Intruality win
Sponsor Ends!
"ACTUALLY it was four times. bitch." (Sleep, basically)
okay but like. when the glasses are on the head, it's like they're invisible. I say as someone who loses their glasses, only to find them in stupidly obvious places. also mood
Virgil DEFINITELTY watched Patton do this for five minutes before he said anything
Roman is in love with his sword, Exhibit D
^(D is for--)
Logititties. that's all
Janus really said "wanna go, bitch?"
also: "I wouldn't be caught dead in a fish fight. I would poison you" -> ah, of course, a snake with style (/j)
"calculator is computer" // "that's technically correct, actually" -> where's the Logicality enjoyers when you need them
Roman Rage Quits at Roblox. also Insecurity
"bitch, I'm not that out there" -> this helps deduce the scale of What The Fuck Is Remus's Normal At
"True...or is it false?" -> he loves fucking with people, doesn't he?
"yeah" -> he sounds so resigned, nooo :(
Endcard Moment: Logan loves jelly-filled donuts
and that's it, folks! This was lovely. Silly gay personality traits.
#sanders sides#sanders sides reaction#sanders sides react#janus sanders#patton sanders#logan sanders#virgil sanders#roman sanders#remus sanders#list#list form#list format#emile picani#sleep sanders#remy sanders#long post
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Hi! Been a long time fan of your work!
idk if this has been asked before but
What are your thoughts on the equivalent of Playboy/Playgirl and things like Only Fans existing on Cybertron & its other colonies? Who uses it most and would lusting on the other faction's photos be looked down on?
Daaaw, I have a fan? How sweet 🥰 glad you like my crazy ramblings lmao
So, ultimately, yeah, I do think there is sex work on Cybertron. Anything from raunchy photoshoots to nude modeling to adult films to BDSM clubs to pleasurebots, it's all there. Any society with a sex drive is going to have sex work and sex-adjacent products/businesses.
Collections like playboy, stuff that can be ordered on a monthly subscription or just a one time thing is probably most popular with the working class: don't get me wrong, the lower castes would love to have access to that sort of thing, but it's not really financially possible. Can't spend money on sexy magazines when every last cent goes to keeping a roof over your helm and making sure you don't starve til next paycheck. Lower castes probably also have homemade sex toys
Smthn like onlyfans, private, personalized sex work where a single content creator works for themselves, those are preferred by the wealthier mecha, because they can Afford It and find something that's to their specific tastes. It's also not uncommon for the higher castes to sponsor someone in exchange for producing the exact content they want.
Ik you didn't ask about it but I do feel the need to mention it: I also think Cybertron had brothels, ranging from rundown little whorehouses to high end establishments with well trained courtesans that people pay half a year's worth of salary just to spend time with. There's even an AU for that 🤭
And finally, viewing cross faction porn... hm. As far as like, the autobot or decepticon code goes? There's nothing explicitly banning it, and most people don't really care all that much. Whatever Steve likes to jerk it to in his off time isn't really anyone's business, yk? If it gets brought up during locker room talk, there's a couple stick-in-the-ass people that would sneer and rag on their companions for lusting at the enemy team. But, for the most part? No one cares what gets your rocks off
#brandwhore speaks#this was such a fun question! i love asks like this 💖#and i mean 👀 if anyone wants to discuss specific mecha in any of the above situations i would be more than happy to oblige!!#send me a character to plop into one of these situations. or a pairing? im not picky#valveplug
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https://www.tumblr.com/onboardsorasora/765315807147442176/slides-up-to-you-real-sneakylike-could-we-use?source=share
O M G
I just had an epiphany. Like, imagine if Sponsor Max wasn't very present during races this season (for plot reasons ofc) and then before Singapore he just sees all the rumours popping off about his favourite lil blorbo and he's like "oh hell nah not on my watch"
He bullies vcarb (with that sweet sponsor money) into keeping Daniel for the rest of the season and then it turns into the most aggressive hostile take over during the off season because well. He *has* the money, and seeing Daniel race *is* his favourite thing ever (and it's really hot too), so of course he'd buy a whole team to make Daniel happy!
Anyway live laugh love Daniel and his grumpy guardog Sponsor Max who *will* use his money to make him happy, and I hope you have a great day bestie!! 🥰❤️
sksksk this is amazing lmao
the most hostile takeover and he'd be soooo petty about it too! anything to make daniel happy
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‼️NIGHTBRINGER LESSON 45 SPOILERS‼️
masterlist | all lessons | season 3 | lesson 44 | lesson 45.2 | lesson 46
did i play all the ruri tunes level last night so i could read the entire lesson and make this post at work? yes.
and i'd do it again BOP BOP
HELP 😭 my man was TIRED
i feel like belphie helped put beel to sleep bc he was too invested in his work and not disappointing lucifer to go to sleep on his own. maybe he was too worried and overused his powers, making beel sleep deeper than he normally does and worrying everyone even more on accident
idk i'm just yapping
maybe it's something lilith related? or maybe it is just an all you can eat buffet with mc and the boys. regardless of if he picks something food related or not, it's gonna involve his family, and i love that about him
thinking about this reminds me of the one bonus scene in nb season 1 (not sure which lesson but i think i talked about it) where beel blamed himself for not telling lucifer about the banshee when it happened and, ultimately, for lilith's death
he and lucifer are so similar in terms of how the feel the need to protect their family at all costs, even if it means killing themselves in the process, and i really wish we got more of the two of them together bc i adore their dynamic
ik we all saw that teaser trailer video...what's going on with him ???
is it a result of messing with the timelines one too many times, or the fact that satan was sentenced to become a human instead of a demon when he fell, or something else entirely?
i thought the post was getting too long, more on this here
shhshdhsgs he's such a dad
with the chapter title being "runaway train", i figured smth like this was gonna happen 😭
aside from that, satan hosting the finals is so on brand for him. gotta love my favorite nerd
but also i'd be PISSED if i was hosting and they didn't tell me shit bc what ???
logically speaking, they won't let anything bad happen to three of the seven lords, their pact holderand best friend/partner, and the demon prince's butler, but anyone with a brain would be panicking if the conductor of the train all of a sudden vanished into thin air and nobody on the train knows how to operate it 💀
hm...
HMMM....
this is probably a stretch, but what if those people are the sponsors for this leg of the science fair? what if they actually want the boys dead?
again, this post is already long so i made a separate one 🫠 mb y'all
:((( pookie
the guilt and helplessness he probably feels for not knowing any of the circumstances despite his status as host, maybe even feeling like he was a pawn of the sponsors who came up with the event in the first place
we know he has self-esteem and self-worth issues and this is not only a punch in the gut, but terrifying bc his self-perceived "incompetence" and inability to help because of his lack of knowledge, something that he usually prides himself on, might end up getting the people he's closest to killed
he can't face the guilt, so he ran
he's so ??? 😭
also, since beel and barb are technically on the same team now despite being competitors before, does that mean they each get a wish if the team as a whole wins, or does the team collectively get one wish? bc just giving one of them a wish wouldn't be fair
and i mean TECHNICALLY force is a part of physics
beel big brain
...we've almost died how many times now?
also, since this part is called "beel's wish", imagine his wish is to save us so we don't die (again) lmao
luke is so not funny 😭
but this is honestly really sweet of diavolo. i had a feeling he'd figure out how to incorporate everyone's wish into his own bc even after winning due to mainly his own efforts, he insisted that it was a team effort
talked about the bonus stories here bc there wasn't enough space for screenshots 🥲
#obey me#obey me nightbringer#obey me spoilers#nightbringer spoilers#obey me nightbringer spoilers#obey me lucifer#obey me mammon#obey me levi#obey me leviathan#obey me satan#obey me asmo#obey me asmodeus#obey me beel#obey me beelzebub#obey me belphie#obey me belphegor#beel obey me#beelzebub obey me#lucifer obey me#belphie obey me#belphegor obey me#obey me lilith#lilith obey me#obey me barbatos#obey me diavolo#obey me luke#obey me solomon#obey me simeon
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ultimately, i don't care if cwsg enjoyers only want to engage with the show's version of kara (+ other supporting characters) and aren't interested in engaging with the comics, but something that i find both annoying and funny is when something supergirl-related is announced and certain cwsg stans who refuse to learn anything about kara's comic canon (yet continue to engage with non-cwsg supergirl media...?) immediately say something along the lines of "i can't wait for when [insert cw supergirl specific character/relationship] appears in [insert upcoming dc media]!!"
it's equal parts funny and annoying to me because it's like. it's SO incredibly unlikely that you'll see any of those characters or relationships (at least those specific interpretations of them) again, and i don't know why you'd expect to...? it's 2024. at this point in time (especially in a post woman of tomorrow world) i really can't see dc intentionally incorporating anything significant from the show into either kara's comics or other media appearances.
everything from the show that has been incorporated into the comics is either not canon anymore/hasn't been mentioned since the beginning of infinite frontier (eliza/jeremiah, national city, kara's connection to the deo, cat working at catco and being kara's boss, "kara danvers" as kara's civilian name), or not even connected to comics!kara whatsoever (nia nal). i just think it's silly to automatically assume that any new piece of supergirl media will follow in the footsteps of a show that hardly ever engaged with supergirl lore/comics at all lmao.
anyway. this post was sponsored by me seeing someone say "we have kara and cat, now im just waiting for alex danvers to be cast!" after cat grant's actress was announced for superman (2025). i really hate to be the bearer of bad news, but you're never seeing alex danvers ever again.
#someday people will learn that cat grant (and other characters like mon el and even kara herself) exist outside of the context of cwsg#sorry i haven't been mean about cwsg in a minute i needed to get it out of my system#anti cwsg#<- i don't feel like censoring character names. so just in case in ends up in their searches.#don't get mad at ME. get mad at YOU for not filtering your desired tags.#anyway cwsg stans really did me a big favor by not buying rebirth-era supergirl comics#now i don't have to worry about editorial mandated cw synergy
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They said Ming is crazily possessive (he is LOL) but Sol without consent claiming Joe his bf is alright? How is that fair?!?? They’re just same person different fonts. Worst candidates ever
We've gotten used to Ming's rubbish. I mean, at this point, we've seen him bludgeon and kidnap another human being.
So, I'd say that right now, Sol is basically a kiddies' version of Ming.
He's what I imagine Ming used to be with Tong. Before Tong was claimed by someone so dear to Ming that Ming was powerless to do anything about it.
Hear me out.
Joe is older than Sol, just like Tong is older than Ming. This might seem redundant, given how pushy both Ming and Sol are. But can you imagine how much more invasive they both would have been if Joe and Tong were younger than them?
Ming has financial influence that he used to get his family to sponsor Tong's movie and elevating Tong's status. Just like Sol has done by putting Joe in his MV.
Sol wants to spend time with Joe and when he's around, he doesn't want anyone else around Joe. The same way Ming acted when he arrived and Tong was too busy to meet with him.
Ming left Thailand when it became clear that there was no hope for him and Tong. What did Sol do when it became clear that there was no hope for him and Joe?
Ming and Sol have not been able to understand that no means no. Ming only got tired of Tong when he fell in love with someone else but right now, Sol has no one else to transfer his obsession to.
And that's why they keep clashing. Because they keep pulling the exact same stunts.
So Anon, you're right. Same person, different fonts.
I also find it funny that while Sol has Wut on his side, Ming has their whole company boss in his pocket to the point that the man really escorted Joe all the way to Ming's car like a valet, lmao.
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Soy Luna Season 3 Episodes 1-30 Thoughts
Okay I've been zooming through these episodes fast while I have the longest break from work I've had since I started the job.
Giving us Lumon for 10 episodes except it's only one-sided on Luna's part and she goes back on it because Nina keeps saying "maybe you're just trying to forget Matteo" is annoying
Nina, no offense, but you have the worst relationship advice fam
Simon and Luna are actually cute together, and people often forget that those in relationships should be capable of being reliable and trusted friends. Relationships don't have to have constant conflict
Poor Luna throughout all of it though. She was about to confess to Simon, only for him to say he's in love with Ambar. I would be crushed
Ambar and Simon having sexual tension in almost every scene they share is crazy for a Disney show. I get why so many people love them together so much
I also like that Simon is the one person she's not scared of being vulnerable around even with their relationship ended, that hug for comfort was everything
Sharon looking like a Dollar Store Carrie-Anne Moss is making it hard for me to take her seriously lmao
Sharon is an awful parental figure to Ambar. "You have to stay with the Valente's because I have a plan to exact revenge against them" is the worst possible thing to say to her when she was the one constant in Ambar's life from the time she was adopted
Alfredo is so stubborn, it is realistic. Old people are like that
The end of Gastina is sad, but understandable. I feel like Gaston did see the video Delfina posted about Eric and Nina and didn't assume she cheated, get mad, or anything like that. However, he was probably thinking "it's unfair for her to be committed to me when I can barely even make time for her"
Eric kind of gives me weird vibes. He's not bad, but I feel like he's an inch away from doing something to get me to dislike him. From my experience, the whole shy guy thing starts seeming like a red flag once you exit high school unless they were homeschooled or escaped an abusive situation tbh
Delfina and Pedro are boring, but I can see them being a stable couple tbh
The scenes involving Lutteo feel forced, like they are telling more than they are showing
Matteo is actually somewhat bearable this season, and I attribute that to him having actual friends beyond just Gaston (who mostly gave him advice)
The Red Sharks are absolutely insufferable. Emilia and Benicio both deserve the worst
I understand Ramiro though. He saw skating as his CAREER more than anyone else. The Jam and Roller team had nothing except each other until their video while the Red Sharks had equipment, a financier, sponsors, a rink, etc. I kind of agree with Ramiro on not feeling too bad about recording them. The whole aspect of being shunned and then "please don't release the video, we're friends" after nobody really talking to him except Jim. I'd be annoyed too
The show makes such a big deal out of Emilia kissing Matteo without his consent (which is very messed up too, don't get me wrong), but it brushed over Matteo doing the same to Luna and somewhat less with Benicio doing the same to Ambar.. I'm not sure how to feel about that
Gary is a horrible person, and Ana deserves someone who is amazing tbh. I know if I was a single 40-ish year old man dating her, I would be obsessed with treating her right and making sure she was happy
It is nice to have a very clear antagonist with a big presence like Gary though. He is lowkey an idiot because if he did things with an ounce of tact and wasn't an asshole for no reason, things wouldn't suddenly start blowing up in his face like the big lack of a coach and his team's lack of discipline (why did he stop at 4 instead of 6 lmao)
#disney soy luna#soy luna#luna valente#sol benson#nina simonetti#simon alvarez#pedro#delfina alzamendi#ambar smith#ramiro ponce#sharon benson#jimena medina#eric andrade#matteo balsano#emilia#benicio#gary lopez#ana valparaiso#lumon#simbar
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