#no thanks man

[doublejango]

Hi. How are you doing today. Sorry for invading your privacy. Your blog looks fascinating and kindly Dm if you’re interested being in a sugar relationship 😊

"I'm more of a Daddy myself," Blitz replied, "and you know, sugar isn't really my thing.

"Besides. I've already got Stolas. Nothing like curling up in bed with a handsome prince. Let me tell you, nobody, and I mean nobody, smells as good as Stolas does. Especially after a nice long fuck, when they're all sweaty and that dusty feather smell is strong. Demon royalty, silk sheets, feathers, ain't nothin' better than that. Especially if I still smell like gunpowder from a long day's work. We're great together.

"So, no offense, but I'm good. Door's right over there."

[amodernpersephone]

to celebrate my birthday i will now be rereading ep:link

[bloodydeanwinchester]

oh man a w*ncest shipping j2 fan just followed me. like what could you possibly want from my blog??? immediate block because i DO NOT want my dean or dean and sammy posts making their way to that side of tumblr 🫤

[kochei0]

I turn to Ares.

Thanks to Tyler Miles Lockett who allowed me to draw inspiration from his ARES piece for page 2! Look at his etsy page it's SICK

⚔️ If you want to read some queer retelling of arturian legends have a look at my webtoon

[sprinkleofquirk]

Tim, on his 13th attempt to sneak out of the mansion to go on patrol with the flu and walking pneumonia: I didn’t “lose” my spleen. To lose something is to imply you don’t know where it is, and I know exactly where my spleen is; it just isn’t in my body-

Alfred, tired™ and armed with a tranquilizer: Even so, Master Drake, I must insist you get back into bed.

[whateveriwant]

I know I’ve already gone on and on about what it’s like to have a size difference with Simon Riley, but I’m sorry, I just will never get over how big and strong this man is.

Like I feel like sometimes his size gets lost on us since he’s surrounded by other tall, buff military guys all the time. But y’all, I’m telling you, this man is big. Like 6’4, 250+ pounds, big enough to eclipse the sun big.

With a man that big, it honestly doesn’t even matter what size you are because he’s always going to be bigger and stronger than you anyway. You can be tall, short, stocky, thin, whatever, and this man is still fully capable (and willing? 👀) of snapping you in half like a twig.

Are you worried about potential home invaders? Well, you shouldn’t be. One quick flick of his wrist and he’s breaking the neck of anyone who tries to threaten you. Did you accidentally lock yourself out of the house? Well, don’t bother calling a locksmith. There’s no lock left to pick after he’s just caved the door in with his foot. Do you have a really stubborn jar you’re struggling to open? Well, hand it over, love. He can crack that sucker open in half a second flat.

But Lord, don’t even get me started when it comes to all the ways Simon uses that strength of his in the bedroom.

Like when he tells you to sit on his face so he can eat you out. Don’t even try it with that nervous, hovering, “I’m too heavy, Si,” bullshit. You better sit your ass down right when and where he tells you to or he’ll hold you down by the hips until he’s had his fill.

Or when, after a night of heavy flirting and teasing, he’s got that look in his eye as he corners you against your entryway wall. Don’t be surprised when one moment your feet are firmly planted on the ground, and the next you’re lifted into the air, your legs slung over his arms as he drills into you like you’re his own little fuck puppet.

Or when he’s got you spread out on his bed, got your knees up by your ears, got the backs of your thighs burning in a way that’s matched only by how your walls have to stretch to take his thick cock. Don’t think he’s being mean or malicious when he sees your eyes well with tears but does nothing to change the way he’s fucking down into you. It’s not that Simon doesn’t care whenever you cry and quiver and plead with him to go easier on you, it’s that he knows the truth. He knows that, deep down, you love when he handles you like he isn’t afraid to break you.

[lesbx]

good news, ive discovered that the maximum dick size in skyrim as per racemenu sliders is somewhere around the distance between riften and solitude, plus a few more hundred or so miles. give or take a little bit for going well beyond the draw distance

[et-in-arkadia]

this is such incredible advice for creating any kind of art i have to put it over here to remind myself

[cutebrittie]

What would you do? 😚

[disteal]

I hate gay people so much. I haven’t been able to hear an imagine dragons song on the radio or in a shop without my brain just IMMEDIATELY being flooded with ‘Okay im imagining his dragon’. People think i just rly hate imagine dragons with the way my face reacts but i don’t im literally fighting such a personal battle against saying something fruity abt mr dragons out of nowhere because the shit gay people say online is so funny

[stealingpotatoes]

Forever thinking about a headcanon I saw where Anakin and Yoda are cornered by pirates and then Yoda starts just starts talking to them in fluent street Huttese with his backwards syntax while Anakin's brain explodes

the only real-world equivalent of that I can think of is it’s like hearing your headmaster/principal speak roadman so

(commission info // tip jar!)

[damsels-things]

Like it or not? 😅

[dizzybizz]

he's wasting perfectly good coffee 🙄

[phantom-shell]

You say you're tryin' to build a transuniversal polydimensional metavortex? Well that's mathematically feasible, I reckon! :D

[tecochet]

mary jane's husband and his boyfriend

[benoits-neckerchieves]

Just found Hugh Grant’s Reddit AMA from 2014, featuring such gems as “I love to kill” and “I will pour almost anything down my throat”

Source: Hugh Grant Reddit AMA