#no shit it's hard
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It's honestly crazy that discussion around testosterone HRT skews so much towards the beginning stages of it (to the point that you have dozens of guys thinking their transition is "failed" if they don't pass by like a year in lol) and what the initial changes of the first couple of months to years look like, like the classic laundry list of those early basic changes like bottom growth, voice drop, etc, when IMO literally none of that compares remotely to the depth and intensity of the long term total masculinization you start to experience like 3-5+ years in.
#also has made it increasingly difficult to relate to those early into their transition honestly#like not in a bitter way it’s just like hard to express how diff the experience is#of being like a year on T vs 5 ���#ETA I muted this post ages ago now but fwiw seeing transphobes pop up in the notes on occasion just to say cruel reactionary shit#you are clowns I cannot imagine seeing a post that is ONLY about discussing with folks about the reality of a medication#and choosing to make that your moment to get a schoolyard bully jab in about how you find it gross or something.#you are less well adjusted than most children. may the universe be kinder to you than you are to others.
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god i love my friends. shout out to people who love their friends. this is a post for friend lovers
#sorry i thought too hard about everything and got weirdly emotional like hgoly shit#i talk to people here every day and we know stuff about each other and shit and we exchange ideas and waaa#we're like all basically penpals but better#im realizing how revolutionary this is. like had we all been born earlier we never would have met#and even if we did we'd have to talk through letters with weeks if not months in between responses#can you imagine that#every day instead i literally wake up and my friends are there#insane#i love having friends
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Obligatory battle of the labyrinth kiss scene
Bonus:
#holy shit it’s done#I’ve been working on this for 34 and half hours according to procreate#nine days#I physically could not stop myself from working on it until it was done#I locked in so hard#I’m shaking#the adhd hyperfocus consumed me#I’m having a visceral reaction to creating this#I HAD to draw it#my art#fan art#artists on tumblr#percy jackson#pjo#percabeth#Percy Jackson and the olympians#Annabeth chase#percabeth fanart#battle of the labyrinth#botl#riordanverse#rrverse
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Fuck hard in the— wait, how did that line go again?
#poolverine#deadpool and wolverine#wade wilson#logan howlett#honda odyssey fucks hard#my art#this is my most intricate painting ever holy shit#hyperfocus really pulled through for once#I guess the secret was just more bloodstains all along
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pls don’t flirt with me i want to be nonchalant so bad but i unfortunately crave connection so intensely that i will give you my entire soul and forgive you over and over until i’ve lost myself completely and feel like i’m drowning
#bpd safe#bpd thoughts#bpd vent#bpd#mentally exhausted#actually bpd#sadgirl#depressing shit#mental health#mental illness#mentally fucked#mentally unstable#disordered eating mention#actually mentally ill#sad thoughts#self h@rm#suic1de#bpd stuff#substance addiction#substance abuse#shitpost#addiction#bpd feels#borderline personality disorder#tw depressing thoughts#girls who do hard drugs#ed culture#eating disoder trigger warning#sadnees#actually borderline
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pls pls heard me out...FIDDLESTAN! <3
ok, i got this ask ten days ago, and I've been thinking about it ever since. Because I got two other asks asking for fiddauthor, and I dON'T KNOW HOW TO LET THEM DOWN LIGHTLY BECAUSE I'M A FIDDLESTAN BITCH THROUGH AND THROUGH 😭😭😭😭 I LOVE THEM SO MUCH!!!!!!
Don't get me wrong, fiddauthor is great and makes sense and everything. But listen. Billford and fiddauthor are multidimensional ships, they are good! But FIDDLESTAN!?!? that shit is the WHAT-THE-HECK-A-HEDRON!!!!!!! Even though it's literally 100% speculation, the implications are FUCKING CRAZY!!!!!!!!! I jumped between three ships so far during this gravity falls thing, each time thinking one is better than the other. I've decided that FIDDLESTAN IS KING!!!!!! I'm sorry. I could rant about them forever. I've been listening to nothing but extended versions of disco music for the past week. (YES THEY HAD A CRAZY ROMANTIC FLING IN VEGAS NO I WILL NOT ELABORATE!!!! (yes i will. I will elaborate at some point. it will be like ten pages or text. or I will draw it. idk.))
Here is a sketchbook doodle from like a week ago. I'm gonna post another fiddlestan thing in a few moments, but my style changes like I'm a completely different artist every week without warning, so I'm gonna leave this by itself!
He comes into YOUR house, he steals YOUR identity, and he fucks YOUR research partner!!! Fuck you!!!!!!!!!!
#i've noticed lately#after we've opened our eyes to some of fords assholeyness#some people are like 'hold on guys i think were being a little too hard on ford 🥺'#NO WE ARE NOT!!!!!!!!!!!#I hail from the iz fandom where everyone knows dib is fucking awful#and we LOVE him for it!!!!#will NOT shy away from admitting how terrible he is - it's why we love him!!!!!#ok enough rant#me typing on tumblr about this shit is like opening pandoras box#gonna close that up now for everyones safety#fiddlestan#gravity falls#stan x fiddleford#gravity falls fanart#ask#answered#anon#sketchbook
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Sketching while streaming s5...
Jonathan Sims I will learn to draw you (this is my doing. I could draw him however I want and I choose to stick with an image of him in my brain that is difficult for me to draw. Masochism.)
Not s5 Mahtins below I enjoyed drawing cuz hes neat:
(Edit: I yassified Martin in the do not separate cuz I wanted his hair fluffier)
#yes I realize Jon and Martin are in different fucking art styles let me live#do not accuse me of being AI this difficulty drawing hands is all natural I worked hard drawing for years just to fucking suck at it#update I listened to 170 I heard it was devastating but my ass was LAUGHING#poor martin but omg me and my buddy had everywhere at the end of time in the background and shit was so funny#he forgor 😭💀#it was emotionally devastating at the end tho Jon suggesting he stay there um btich NO?!#Jon the literal Lonely is not worse tham being around you get a fucking grip#helen continues to be the best character her showing up for the juicy gossip is so fucking real#anyagays#tma#tma podcast#the magnus pod#tma fanart#jonathan sims#the magnus archives#my art#martin blackwood#jonmartin#jmart#tma jmart#tma season 5#tma spoilers#i have to make a diagram for my jon and martin designs for s5 SO bad#if only i could draw jon.... >:(#i need u guys to know that my martin loves plaid and jon is wearing a plaid shirt thats too big in s5... inchresting....
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Check out the character creator for Palworld, it lets you be legitimately fat
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"there's something about the dying that feels familiar" fucking unbelievably metal thing to be told. you die and you could swear you've been here before. the last thing you feel before your breath leaves your body is intense deja vu. you've never died before but somehow you know how this goes. you have an uncanny feeling being dead is a temporary gig for you, but you have no idea what gives you that impression. and then you're alive again. and you remember dying. and all you remember is that there was something about it that felt familiar.
#stuff#the adventure zone#the adventure zone balance#taz#taz balance#ELEVENTH HOUR MY BELOVED!!!!!!#HARD SHIT#KISSINF U!#eleventh hour
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"oil changes used to be $20 and take 20 minutes" hi I'm here to die on this hill, while I agree that $160 is too much money for an oil change, an hour or more is not too much time. working at a quick change shop is physically debilitating, the mechanics are in a giant pit or basement under the cars and they do not let them cool off before working!!! they have hot oil pouring from above their heads and then they have to stick their arms into the engine parts of a still hot car. my dad used to come home with burns up to his elbows, sometimes so bad he couldn't move his hands. oil changes need to take longer than 20 minutes, cars need time to cool down
#not to mention being in the pit means all the work you're doing is shoulder breaking arms above your head type shit#just thinking about how hard it would be to not bump into anything while your arms are literally above your head. like#the cars need to cool down
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i need well meaning cis people to stop attemping to steelman trans healthcare conversations because it basically always ends with them just lying about easily checkable things "no minors are getting irreversible treatments" wrong not true "no minors are having surgery" also false, like instead just say the truth: currently some minors (few, but some) are able to access hrt that will have some irreversible changes on their body, some (even fewer) minors are able to access surgery.
the counter to transphobes screaming "these kids are being irreversibly changed" isn't "no children are accessing this care" it's "puberty is also an irreversible change" and "i think under 18s and even under 16s should be able to make medical decisions actually"
"no minors are accessing this care" means that transphobes can easily point to the examples of minors who are accessing that care, which just make us look like liars. sometimes teenagers and children need to make medical choices on their own. i think a 14 y/o should be able to get an abortion. i think trans kids and teens should be able to have the approriate care, which for some will just be like, picking a new name or haircut, and for some, sure, could be surgery.
#*m#so many journalists / youtubers / podcasters try to defend trans people but just like. say this shit that is basically a lie#i get why i get it's an easier convo to have but actually having the hard conversation is really fucking important.#not for the transphobes those people are fucked but like. for the well meaning libs who listen to x news piece or x podcast u know
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finally a manga I can relate to
#love bullet#and by that I mean I actually do relate to it really hard love bullet emotionally shattered me#as someone who has a hard time with romance and wants more than anything to actually be in love#This shit Hit Hard#big numbers
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a redraw of the first drawing i posted here to celebrate the fact that ive been in tumblr for more than a whole year posting my shit and havent deleted my blog in panic yippee \:D/ (mushy rant in tags)
#i realised too late that it has been more than a fuking year (august 9)#and for context: ive had 3 different intagram art accounts and i deleted all 3 of them a few months before creating them. anxiety amiright#here it has been so different bc people are so nice??? it has been a pretty plesant experience here w all of u really#im so glad to have found myself in such a wonderful part of the fandom and amazing mutuals that i never talk to bc im shit w texting#the atention has been overwhelming ngl. i have over 2000 followers which. holy fuck???#it doesnt feel like a real number and for my own sake im nnot gonna treat it as one#like i apreciate the support and ppl liking what i do but im not here to make number go big yk? im here to connect w other humans#and yall have been amazing humans ^^ thank u for all the wonderful tags and comments and the support overall#it has been so cool sharing my art and finding other artist whom i respect oh so very much. some of them even follow me back wtf#i hope to continue being here for as long as i can and keep growing as an artist and sharing that process with other without fear#also my amy redesign actually goes so hard idk why i forgot about it nxnfbcncb#sth#sonic fanart#sonic#amy rose#nov.aart#nov.junk
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troll who isnt allowed caffeine or she'll reenact the Hammy energy drink scene from over the hedge clay prefers tea anyway
#bruce is back home so hes not in the comic (i couldnt fit him in frame)#i stopped halfway through working on a different troll comic to make this troll comic this keeps happening#of the firm belief trolls have animalistic traits so they hashtag PLAY HARD#im talkin pouncin chasing biting etc etc#let my girls be rowdy at 8 in the morning (branch has babyproofed most of the bunker so they dont knock shit over when they run around)#trolls#trolls band together#clay trolls#john dory trolls#viva trolls#poppy trolls#branch trolls#brozone#im not tagging this as cliva cause imo they are found siblings fuck u but if u see them as lovers i support you barely#im kidding live your dream idc#my art#floyd trolls
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ok im getting too much hate im done. fuck man. i give up.
#we are trying so so hard to get jobs#nowhere is hiring#we dont have shit worth selling#our lives are fucked man! its over! fuck!!!
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✨⚔ The Veilguard 🛡✨
#Dragon Age#Dragon Age: the Veilguard#DAtV#FanFriDAys#Neve Gallus#Bellara Lutare#Taash#Davrin#Warden Davrin#Assan#Lucanis Dellamorte#Lace Harding#Scout Lace Harding#Emmrich Volkarin#Fanart#was feeling insane last friday night and now here we are~#and of course new trailers get released and i find out I've drawn everyone's shit wrong :)))))#ahhhh well I've given it my best and i was probably gonna end up taking some liberties somewhere anywayssss#I can't WAIT to meet all of the in October i'm so excited i'm gonna be sick I'm Already Throwing Up
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