#no one cares what other people upload because we only care about what WE upload and the attention it gets
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luxeberries · 1 year ago
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i think about bo burnham saying 'if you can live your life without an audience, you should do it' at least once a day
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funhouse-mirror-barbie · 10 months ago
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I just. I don’t really want to keep talking about it, but I have to get these feelings out because the more I think about Somerton’s excuses video the angrier I get, ESPECIALLY given his insistence in the video that there isn’t a real community within LGBTQ spaces—specifically this quote; “We wanted it to be a channel where every queer person could feel welcomed... And we failed at that. That is something that, in hindsight, I think is impossible to create.”*
Because wow! Aren’t you the one who called Becky Albertalli, a bisexual woman, straight ?? Aren’t you the one who has consistently stolen queer and lgbtq people’s work as your own , profiting off of their labor and research and time? Aren’t you the one who sicced your fan base on smaller creators who noticed your plagiarism??? Aren’t YOU the one who LIED blatantly about lesbians “historically having it easier” than gay men ?? That LIED about Radclyffe Hall’s book being banned and destroyed???? What was it you said?? That she got to go on with “her merry little life”???
Fuck you. How dare you.
How dare you say there is no community, no safe space for all of us, when you have literally done NOTHING but maliciously and consistently stolen from, lied to, manipulated, and put down and bullied the community.
You have done nothing but try to break apart and put down your lgbtq siblings, so of course you believe that solidarity, safety, and intersectionality within our community is not something that can exist.
There are lgbtq people who are actively working to make those spaces, where everyone feels welcomed, but you clearly see yourself as being above that, above collaboration and community, above listening to other’s experiences.
You only think that a space where all queer and lgbtq people are welcomed and feel safe is impossible because your goal was never to carve out that space. It was to make money and take advantage of the people who looked up to you.
You think it’s impossible because you never once thought about the people you were stealing from, never once cared about the community, our history, the activism of our elders and all they did, never thought about how your actions and lies would hurt the community.
Stop making excuses and lying. Be fucking better.
———————————————————————
*(Somerton, James. “A Measured Response.” YouTube, uploaded by James Somerton, 26 February 2024, https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=kCNByQ6WopM)
(And that’s how you cite a FUCKING source, James. It took me a minute, after two seconds of research on how to source a YouTube video. Fuckhead)
*I added the link to the video to make a point, as you need to have it in citations. The video is monetized, so please either don’t click it and watch elsewhere OR watch with ad-blockers.
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yoru-no-seiiki · 1 year ago
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DOG BLOOD (狗血)
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YANDERE! PROTAGONIST x SADISTIC! LOVE INTEREST! READER
tw/cw: everyone’s gender is up to interpretation. dddne, yandere themes, violence, suggestive content
but what if you were never the villain, but a love interest.
MINORS/AGELESS BLOGS ARE STRICTLY FORBIDDEN FROM ALL MY POSTS!! LEAVE OR I WILL BLOCK!!
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CASSIEL was a bored, lonely person. Through countless of timelines and people they’ve been with, none have piqued their interest in the slightest.
Even you.
But as a love interest, it was your job to keep them well — interested. Engaged. Entertained by the thought of romancing you.
But they never did.
They always ended up completing the game without touching a single person. Not any of the romancable options nor even the concubines offered to them in their conquests. A solitary existence.
You could only smile as a façade to hide your frustrations, as in some timelines they saw it fit to kill you.
“You . . . “
Your lines were as followed,
‘You can use me however you’d like.’
You said it at least a hundred times now. Your diction, tone, gestures were always perfectly replicated. It was the one line you could say that didn’t result in a horrific torture and death.
But this time, you felt nothing. Fear left you long ago. What was the point of being careful when you knew every outcome of every action and decision?
“You’re bored are you not?”
Cassiel’s head swiveled so quickly you were almost worried it would come right off.
You did the same thing you always did. You climbed their lap. Your hand around atop shoulders. Your face next to their ear.
In many other lifetimes, it’d end with them shoving you off. Maybe even, breaking your legs before outright killing you.
And yet this time it was as different. Stiff.
Your pointer finger grazes across their jaw, to their lips, and then their nose bride as you studied their beautifully crafted features. The protagonist was the Gods’ favorite after all, you never truly had the opportunity to savor that perfectly sculpted face.
“Lie down, be good, and we can have some fun. Shall we, your highness?”
The night was long. The two of you were inexperienced, but you weren’t about to let go of such an opportunity — your stamina be damned.
Adrenaline carried you throughout the night. Their highness’s wet eyelashes and swollen lips were another point of motivation. As they came undone underneath you several times, it all ended when curiosity took hold of you once more and your hands reached their throat.
And you squeezed. Wrenched all the air out of their throat.
Finally, a familiar sight greets you as the world collapses. Because what would it be without its protagonist?
[ RESET COMPLETE : BEGINNING CONSCIOUSNESS UPLOAD ]
You awoke again, back to the same place and time. Your eyes flicked to your hands.
Your heart fluttered.
You reached climax after climax with the royal. The protagonist you sought after for what felt like hundreds and thousands of years.
But nothing felt better than the moment you ended their life instead. The power you felt. You were utterly drunk on it.
In any case, after that event, you slowly began realized how soft the protagonist truly was. The conqueror of the world melted like a puddle when you took the charge, and almost evaporated when you’d coddle or pamper them afterwards.
You also slowly began to realize how much more you needed to get that high once more. Simply killing them wasn’t enough. You wanted them to feel betrayed. You wanted them to scream in horror once you flayed them alive. You wanted them to cry out in fear when you’d chase them down and re-create those times when they’d torture you.
But then, you would catch a smile here and there. In moments where it wasn’t supposed to exist. Cassiel moaning during the times you’d cut open his arms in an attempt to study their body’s anatomy better wasn’t something the pleased you at all. It took away the pleasure of your hobby. The joy you’d receive when you had them to play within your hands. The ecstasy of being the one to bring about pain to your torturer’s favorite.
“Stop making sounds you’re distracting me.”
“My . . . hah . . . apologies. It just feels . . . amazing.”
You paused. Your movements frozen as your mind processed what they just said.
Tch. Turn-off.
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©️ yoru.no.seiiki - yun | 2023
taglist: @the-dumber-scaramouche @justkouisenough @rxflen
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leclercdream · 1 year ago
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tell me who i am pt.3
pairing: daniel ricciardo x reader
when in austin everything comes crashing down on reader because people on the internet are mean af
author's note: not much going on in this chapter bc of picture limit haha, will probably upload part 4 after the gp so i have more social media content!
tw: slut shaming
part 1 part 2 part 3 part 4
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yourusername
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liked by danielricciardo, lilymhe, charles_leclerc and 182,325 others
yourusername: im damned if i do give a damn what people say
tagged: danielricciardo, alexandrasaintmleux, landonorris, friend1, friend2, friend3
view all 55 comments
danielricciardo: there’s just no reason for you to be this fine
danielricciardo: wow
danielricciardo: marry me
↳ yourusername: brb crying
landonorris: ew
↳ yourusername: shut up this is your fault
lilymhe: you are glowing!!
↳ alexandrasaintmleux: oh trust me, she is being well taken care of, thats why
↳ friend1: yeah we can all hear it
↳ yourusername: jealous bitches
comments in this post have been limited
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danielricciardo
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liked by landonorris, alexandrasaintmleux, kellypiquet and 439,234 others
danielricciardo: As many of you know, this is my girlfriend y/n. We have been dating for 3 years now and she is not only my girlfriend but also my best friend, biggest supporter and the love of my life. For some unknown reason many of you have taken upon yourselves to leave hateful comments on her social media, even taken it as far as saying stuff to her face at the GPs she attended. Do not slut shame women for being proud of their bodies and feel comfortable with it. If you don’t like it, you don’t have to look. yourusername happens to be one of the people I know, that being one of the main reasons I fell in love with her. She is passionate, selfless, funny, caring, beautiful. So please, if you consider yourself a fan of mine and have ever treated her like less than any of that, you are not welcome here.
Any hate comments, threats or anything slightly disrepectful will be deleted and blocked. If you treat the people I love like that, you are not my fan.
Thank you for the tattoo baby!
tagged: yourusername
view all 24 comments
landonorris: imagine having a girlfriend that gets a tattoo because of you
↳ yourusername: you will never know ha
↳ landonorris: haha so funny!!
landonorris: jokes aside, hate comments are NOT welcome on my profile either. y/n is my best friend and i love her (dont let this get to your head PLEASE) so i wont tolerate any hate towards her.
liked by danielricciardo and yourusername
maxverstappen1: 🧡
alexandrasaintmleux: love you guys!
charles_leclerc: You guys are amazing, see you in a few days!
yourusername: i love you sososo much 🍯🦡 you are the love of my life!!!
yourusername: how did i get SO lucky
yourusername: thank you so much for this
comments in this post have been limited
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landonorris
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liked by danielricciardo, yourusername, maxverstappen1 and 637,231 others
landonorris: Nothing better than a few days with friends.
tagged: danielricciardo, alexandrasaintmleux, yourusername, maxfewtrell, friend1, friend2, friend3
view all 1,425 comments
yourusername: low quality lando.jpg
↳ landonorris: its because i have a low quality model
↳ yourusername: yourself?
↳ landonorris: shut up
maxfewtrell: bob stop drinking you have media day tomorrow
↳ danielricciardo: time for a break i guess
user1: kinda love this friend group
user2: 8 pretty best friends
user3: the switch all of you had after daniels post lol
↳ user4: i mean it was about time they left the poor girl alone
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taglist: @urmotheris @minkyungseokie @dhhdhsiavdhaj @dl-yum @1655clean @skepvids @forevercaffeinated-lee @laneyspaulding19 @dark-night-sky-99 @bibissparkless @crlsummer
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blossominghunnie · 3 months ago
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𝐅𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐢𝐜𝐞
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Pairing: Matthew x 10th!fem!member
Summary: Fanservice can be helpful sometimes, especially when you’re trying to hide a secret relationship from your fans and the world.
Genre: Fluff, established relationship
Warning: None
Notes: I just love writing for this man. 🙂‍↔️
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Fans have always liked you and Matthew together, they live for every interaction you have with him. This started since pre-debut, right after contents of zb1 started being uploaded. Back in your boys planet days you didn’t really interact a lot with the boy, but some star creators had the hope that you would end up working together in at least one presentation, it didn’t happen unfortunately but they were over the moon when you debuted together.
Since you were the only girl in the group, you were shipped with basically every one of the group, minus Yujin, since you were an 03 liner. But their favorite pair was with Matthew, which was actually ideal because you two had been dating for about 4 months now. It was the perfect way to hide it.
You were always next to each other, leaning your head on his shoulder or viceversa, him being your helper while you cook (he doesn’t do much, he just likes being near you), him always touching you in any way (hand on your thigh, hands clasped together, arm around your shoulders or waist, etc).
At first you were pretty careful when the cameras were on, until a live where Matthew leaned his head onto yours (he was sitting behind you) and placed his arms around your shoulders. You moved your head upwards to look at him, a loving look on both your eyes and a small blush could be seen on your cheeks if you looked closely (which was what happened.) It was a quick exchange that fans weren’t supposed to catch since you were on one of the ends of the phone’s screen but surprise, surprise, they did.
That small clip of the live went viral, it was EVERYWHERE. After this, you were much much more shipped with him, everyone thought you looked so cute together.
You didn’t think much about it, until your timelines were filled with edits of the two of you and even on fan signs zeroses wanted tons of more new interactions.
“Matt? Have you been seeing more posts of us?” You asked him a few days after the bomb exploded; you were lying together on his bed, just scrolling through your phones while playing with his hair, his head resting on your chest.
“Mhm, it’s entertaining to watch them. We look cute.”
You nodded, you did like them. There were a lot of talented editors.
“I think it’s the first time I’ve seen that many. And people ships us a lot.”
“As they should, we’re the cutest together.” Matthew turned around and looked at you with a smile while you giggled. He leaned and gave you a quick peck on the lips.
“Can’t deny it.” You agreed, a lovesick smile on your face.
Oh if your shippers could see you now.
════ ⋆★⋆ ════
Zb1 masterlist || Main masterlist
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gibsongirled · 4 months ago
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i’m obsessed with girl dad!schlatt 🤭 can we have a fic where they’re high school sweethearts (reader with a normal job out of the spotlight) and she joins the podcast for the first time and schlatt introduces her to everyone as his wife as she’s never been in a video/mentioned before
would love their daughter making an appearance—maybe either hearing her on the baby monitor or smth and schlatt goes to take care of her
love your writing 🫶 i can’t wait to read anything new you post
ANYONE ELSE BUT YOU !!
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description: some say that high school sweethearts don't last, you and Schlatt proved them wrong.
a/n: this was such a cute req !! (the title's the same as the song by the moldy peaches :3)
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People have said that high school sweethearts would not make it past high school, and some of them were right. But you and Schlatt were the exception. Hah, suck on that, other ex high school sweethearts.
The two of you met during your sophomore year, having shared the same History class. Schlatt sat in the row behind you and occasionally, the two of you would exchange glances and go on with your day, because high schoolers are awkward like that. You started seeing him more when one of your friends started dating one of his friends, causing you to get to know him through mutual friends.
And eventually, the two of you got closer. A lot closer. You sat on the bleachers at his baseball games, stayed up late with him while he edited his videos, and was his date to prom. That night under the poorly decorated stars in the gym while the DJ played the weirdest tracks you’ve ever heard was one of your core memories. And then the two of you started dating and no one was surprised. You two made it way too obvious how much you liked each other.
When Schlatt started doing Youtube full time, you said that you wanted to be kept out of the spotlight and he agreed with you. He kept his real life and online life separate- only letting the closest friends know that he was dating someone. Of course, those same close friends were invited to the small ‘friends and family only’ wedding you two had a few years later. Another core memory that he has framed and placed on his setup that’s out of view from the camera.
Schlatt went on hiatus when you were pregnant with your daughter. He had scheduled his already made videos to upload at a certain time and was completely offline from the internet after that, being by your side 24/7. The hiatus continued on for a few months after your daughter was born and then the internet started speculating where he disappeared to, because this was far from his usual sparse uploads.
Your late night talks had delved into how to continue streaming without revealing you and the baby. And you decided to fill his viewers in on your existence. He was definitely shocked, but ultimately it’s your decision and that was final.
“Schlatt, who’s with you today?” Ted asked on the latest Chuckle Sandwich episode, waving at you through the camera. “Audio listeners - love you to death - Schlatt has a woman with him.” Of course, Ted knew who you were- having been invited to your small wedding years prior. He was just playing it up for the camera.
You waved back at Ted, smiling as Schlatt grabbed his mic and talked into it. “My wife.”
“Your wife?” Tucker asked incredulously and Schlatt nodded, smiling widely as he pulled you into his side. “My wife! Say hi, toots.”
“Hi, Ted, Tucker.” You beamed, feeling anxiety and excitement mix into one intense feeling. You heard the baby monitor suddenly crackle to life with a loud cry, and you sighed softly, removing your headphones and began to get up when Schlatt stopped you, getting up himself. “I’ll get her. You sit tight, babe.” He whispered to you and made a hand motion to the camera to continue the session without him. You slid the headphones back on, keeping one ear open to listen to what was happening on the monitor.
The three of you continued on making random conversations about all sorts of stuff until Schlatt came back. He kissed you on the top of your head and sat back down beside you.
“How is she?” You asked, looking at him.
“She’s good, just needed a bottle.”
“Ah, okay.”
That small conversation between the two of you was left unedited and Twitter was on fire when the episode came out, because not only was he married, he also had a baby! The two of you were trending for a good while, and you are well loved by his viewers.
You were so glad the two of you gave it a chance back in high school, and you couldn’t think of anyone else to share this life with. Schlatt was your soulmate and you were his.
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hdmsbsna · 10 days ago
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Hello, I saw your post that you uploaded about Paul's writings😭😭😭, so I wanted to ask if you could make one of Paul x actress reader, I don't know, maybe he's going to see it behind the scenes or I don't know
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REQUESTED: so i kind of got carried away with this, and i actually kind of love it. i'm deciding on whether or not i should make it a series, never done one before though😭 anyways...let me know what you guys think.
pairing: paul mescal x reader (fluff)
warnings: none
description: close, but not close enough follows two popular actors, you and paul, navigating a close friendship complicated by rumors and paparazzi. after a wild night, you both deal with the fallout of being misinterpreted as a couple, despite only wanting to stay friends. you both navigate your friendship with humor, understanding, and subtle flirtations, ultimately realizing how much you mean to each other.
word count: 2.2k
title: close, but not close enough.
song: lowkey by rochelle jordan
you wake up with a throbbing headache, which reminds you of the things that occurred last night but before you have time to reminisce… you all of a sudden have the urge to vomit. you quickly run to your bathroom and puke your organs out, it feels like never-ending vomit.
you’re about three minutes into just pure retching when you feel a pair of hands on ur shoulders, you’re too out of it to care who’s touching you, you just take the support and continue with your business. eventually the person’s hands pull back your hair, and as they graze over your neck that’s when you realize whose hands those belongs to
“PAUL? WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE?” you yell.
“jesus fucking christ, i slept over. do you mind?” he responds back
“do i mind? this is my house.” you respond lowering your voice. “do i mind?” repeating the sentence again wondering where he found the audacity.
“listen, i’m sure you remember we were all drunk. the others were able to get dd’s but i forgot to beforehand and when i tried to call an uber they hung up on me. i slept on the couch, don’t worry.” paul said clearly, trying not to piss you off any more.
“gosh paul, you know you can’t do shit like this. what if the paparazzi catches you leaving my house? i really don’t need another rumor going around.” you say, completely calm now.
“yeah, you’re right i’m sorry but at least we’re saving gas today.” he responds back, clearly not that sorry.
“pfhaha you think we’re driving to set together? you’re out of your mind, you sir are going back to your house and getting your own car.” you say matter-of-factly.
“really? you hate me that much?”
“yes..” you say watching his expression get mad. “now go get your stuff and i’ll see you in a bit.”
“fine whatever, hope you get even sicker.” he says as he walks out of your bedroom.
“FUCK YOU!” you yell back. you hear his laughter from across the house.
“love you too!” he says as the front door opens and closes.
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you and paul are both very popular actors, you guys have worked on a project once before and both of you guys are back to do another. he was one of your best friends and you genuinely enjoyed his presence but unfortunately because of the first film you guys filmed which was a romance, so many people have ‘shipped’ you guys together including fans, directors, writers and even your mutuals. it can be so frustrating when so many people want you together. you and paul of course don’t like each other, only friend feelings there, however you obviously take on more responsibility between the two of you, making sure that what you do doesn’t give people the wrong impression. unfortunately for you, paul doesn’t care at all.
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“i’m saying that we can’t be publicly hanging out, people will get the wrong impression” you say over the phone, currently on facetime with him.”
“who gives a shit? i mean we know exactly what we are and what we aren’t, people are going to come up with their own impressions anyways so we should just be ourselves.” paul responds not understanding your worry.
“yeah, i know but i don’t want to have to always worry about our outings being the headline of the next ‘people’ magazine” you say trying to get him to understand.
“we’re already in the ‘people’ magazine.” pauls retorts.
“okay, well this is my decision whether or not you agree with it. only private hangouts from now on.”
“fine,” pauls says clearly not happy with your decision “maybe we should just fake date and like give them what they want and then we’ll break up and no one will care about us again”
“you’re actually insane for that, tell me that wasn’t an actual thought of yours.” you chuckle.
“i’m just trying to think of ways where i can enjoy the company of one of my best friends.”
“i just told you, private hangouts. there’s no way around it, that’s that.” you say sternly.
“you’re hot when you’re serious.” paul says, expecting a reaction from you.
“okay and that’s where we end this call, talk to you never.”
“mhm, love you too sweetie.”
that conversation happened about three months ago and you must say, paul had done an excellent job making sure you guys were never seen together. that’s one of the things you loved most about him, he may not be happy with your decisions but he’ll always respect and follow them. you know paul loves you and just wants to hang out with his best friend, but you can’t afford the damage of one misinterpreted photo affecting you for months out of your life. paul may not know it now, but this decision is benefiting him a lot.
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you took a shower right after paul left, you definitely needed it especially with all the vomit on you. you took your hangover medications that you’ve had for years. 
after your shower, you got into some comfy clothes and tied your hair up. you didn’t feel like putting in any effort to your appearance today, especially since paul already saw you this rough.  you grab your keys, wallet and phone and head out the door. you walk to a coffee shop and order a matcha latte and have an uber pick you up and take you to set. 
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the uber has dropped you off, and you make your way to set. as you walk past everyone, you’re getting so many awkward looks. the tension is extremely high, you walk past your favorite producer and he just puts his head down. finally, you make it to your chair only to be interrupted.
“hey, umm the director wants to see you…” emily says awkwardly, she’s the director’s assistant.
“okay, where is he?” you ask.
“he’s over by the food.”
“mkay, thanks.” you respond as you start making your way to the food area.
on your way there you bump into paul…he sure knows how to clean up.
“hey, you heading to steve?” he asks.
“what? yeah, are you?” you ask clearly confused.
“yeah, emily told me he wanted to see me. you think we’re in trouble?” he asks.
“i mean we haven’t done anything wrong so he probably just wants to talk about a scene or something.”
“maybe, did you see how people were staring when you walked in?”
“yeah it was super weird, they did it to you too?” you ask him.
“yeah, they did.” 
you arrive at the food area and you see your director, steve. he’s grabbing some grapes and putting them on his plate. you and paul both give each other a stare and start walking towards him. you notice that some people around you were staring as you went up to steve.
“sir, you wanted to see us?” you say as you lightly tap his shoulder.
“ahh, hello guys. yes, i did want to see you both. i just wanted to remind you guys that dating while filming is not my preference, and although we’re almost finished shooting i will not hesitate to replace you guys.”
“i’m sorry…what?” paul asks, clearly upset.
“yeah, where is all of this coming from?” you ask irritated.
“next time you guys sleep together, try to be a little more sneaky.” he says as he throws a phone on the table and walks away.
you and paul both go to look what’s on the phone and to your disdain it’s ‘people’ magazine with the big and bold title of  “actor, paul mescal, was seen leaving co-stars apartment, proving all of the rumors true.” and right below that, is a picture of paul looking straight into the camera, only a block away from your apartment.
“fuuuuuuuuck” paul almost whispers.
“you’ve got to be shitting me. this is fucking ridiculous.” you say.
“listen, i’m so sorry. i really tried to be sneaky.”
“no, it’s not your fault. i knew this would happen eventually, i was just hoping it would be after we wrapped.” you say disappointedly.
“well, i guess we just have to explain ourselves to steve and hope for the best.”
“yeah, i guess so.” you sigh.
you honestly weren’t mad at paul at all, after all it’s not like he was the one who made these pictures surface. but you were however, mad at everyone else for believing that shit. you had assumed that over the year and a half you’ve worked with these people, they would be able to figure out what was false and what wasn’t. of course, you were wrong in that thinking…
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you had just finished wrapping up filming for the day, you were so exhausted and honestly all you wanted to do was go home and get drunk again.
“hey, you did a great job today.” paul says, interrupting your thoughts.
“thank you paul, as did you,” you think for a moment “you wanna come over and have a drink?”
paul laughs. “you’re joking right?”
“what? why would i be joking?”
“well i mean you’re the one that’s always saying we can’t be seen together.” paul says, chuckling.
“well, we’ve already been ‘seen’ together so let’s just enjoy ourselves.” you say, really wanting some company.
“god, if only someone had said that before.” paul says sarcastically.
“are you coming or not?”
“sureee, since you want me sooo bad.” paul says teasingly.
“yeah yeah, fuck you.”
you grab your stuff and walk off set with paul. “did you bring your car?” you ask paul.
“no i got an uber this morning.” he responded.
“mmm okay, well i’ll give you a ride then.” you say.
you open your car door and paul walks over to left side, getting into the passenger seat. you both are in the car and you turn the heater on because of how cold it was. you have paul put on some music and you head back to your apartment. the music honestly became useless considering you guys were chatting the whole time, mostly talking about the rumors going around. 
﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏
you eventually arrive at your apartment, both you and paul get out of the car. you unlock the gate and head inside, taking off your slides once you reach your front door. you unlock your door and let paul shut and lock it.
“i’m going to get in some more comfortable clothes, liquor’s in that cabinet.” you say pointing your finger to a cabinet right above the fridge.”
“alright.” pauls responds.
you quickly go in your room and grab some loose shorts and a hoodie, changing your socks as well. you make your way to the kitchen and find two glasses of wine. you loved wine.
“good choice paul good choice.”
“what can i say? i know you better than you give me credit for.”
“it sure appears that way,” you say in response. “come on let’s go sit on the couch, i’ll put on a movie.”
you and paul head to the couch sitting next to each other, you grab the remote and turn on the tv scrolling through peacock.
“mmm, we should watch ‘speak no evil’ it just came out” you say.
“yep, that’s fine by me.” paul says.
﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏
“why the fuck wouldn’t they just go through the front door?!” you say, upset over the character’s choice.
you’re about an hour into the movie and seven glasses of wine into the night. over the night you and paul had managed to scoot closer to each other, you lay your head on his shoulder as you continue to watch the movie. you’re a lightweight when it comes to alcohol which is why you only ever drink around paul, you find yourself staring at paul as he’s watching the movie. his blue eyes appear darker than they actually are and his skin lighting up with every flash of the movie. paul eventually turns to face you, both of you just staring at each other. you look down at his lips as he looks down at yours, you bite the inside of your cheek. you continue to hold his gaze before finally returning back to the movie.
the movie comes to the end, and you guys both shuffle around. paul stretching and you doing the opposite, you were so tired. all you wanted to do right now was fall asleep. “paul, take me to my room please.” you ask, not even thinking about it.
“yes ma’am” paul responds as he picks you up and carries you to your room, laying you down on your comfortable and unmade bed. as soon as your body hits that mattress, a sense of relaxation clouds your body. you mumble a ‘thank you’ to him as you slowly drift off. 
“i’ll see you tomorrow then,” paul says as he walks to your door, he pauses for a moment before saying 
“i enjoy you so much, you don’t even understand.” 
“me too paul,” you tiredly mumble. “i love you, see you tomorrow.”
“goodnight lovely girl.”
hope you guys liked this, let me know if i should make it a series💕
requests and dms are opened, feel free to get in touch. also just turned on anonymous requests, i wanted to keep your thoughts private. love you guys !!
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hoshinoyozora · 2 years ago
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Poor, Unfortunate Soul(s)
🖤 Pairing: Yandere! Self-aware! Twisted Wonderland x Female! Reader
💛 Word Count: 1,3k+
❤ Warnings: -
[Edited]
Do not re-upload my writing to another website or use it without my permission. Also, don’t ask for a sequel unless I like the story enough to write one. Please reblog so other people can see my stories!
***
Just a lil scenario about MC who ‘dismisses’ their existences aka me lmao.
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“They’re just a bunch of game characters, anyway. Why should I care so much about them?”
You laughed, unaware of the hearts that you broke within the screen. The thin yet sturdy piece of glass that separated you from the people who thought of you as their world. Their everything. Your friend chuckled, adding salt to the injury. Had she didn’t ask you why you hadn’t logged into the game for days, weeks even, maybe they wouldn’t be so humiliated and disappointed.
But did that mean they wouldn’t know your true opinion on them otherwise?
Maybe ignorance was bliss, because, then, they would’ve kept holding onto the hope for you to come back. To still want them the same way they wanted you. In this world of codes and numbers, you were the one real thing in their lives. You were human. Warm, fleshy, and expressive. And yet, you dismissed their existences so easily just because you both lived in two different worlds.
Did they really mean nothing for you? Were all of your reactions towards them merely a façade? Or a memory so insignificant you forgot about it in the next day?
“Maybe I should just delete the app. It feels like a chore to open it nowadays.”
The sky darkened, the ground trembled, and the thunder rumbled as the result of a certain dragon fae. Was this your true self? Then again, NRC was a school of villains. They shouldn’t be surprised if you, the Player, turned out to be the biggest villain of all. Not even Malleus Draconia could hold a candle to you. Your words alone had the ability to mold and break their spirits. Your touch alone could move them somewhere else and show them how beautiful Twisted Wonderland was with you by their side. And your presence alone gave them a reason to live.
If you were to disappear, wouldn’t that be comparable to death? A slow, painful death where everyone lost themselves in depression and rage, and ultimately, destroyed themselves. In a moment of morbid curiosity, they wondered if that was what you wanted all along. You toyed with their hearts, and when you got bored, you moved onto their lives.
“We… we can’t just let her leave!” A boyish voice, thick with desperation and an even desperate attempt to recompose, shattered the mournful silence. Everyone recognized him as Ace Trappola, one of Yuu’s enviable first friends and troublemakers from Heartslabyul. “We need to stop her! Come on, guys. Are we really going to stop now, after everything we’ve done to reach her?”
“But how?” Leona asked, sounding even more listless somehow. Despite his pride and consent, you’d taken a peek into his past and remained amicable with him. It didn’t matter that it was for the sake of the plot, your vessel, Yuu, still approached him and asked for his help during Octavinelle’s story. Didn’t that mean something for you? For him? “Just because we’ve managed to hack into her phone doesn’t mean we can drag her here. There’s only so much we can do to make her stay.”
Ace flinched, unprepared for the reality to slap him twice.
“I-I don’t know.” He turned to face the Diasomnia gang who, with the exception of the sniffling Sebek, looked as somber as a funeral guest. “Malleus-senpai, Lilia-senpai, you guys gotta know something about bringing someone from another world, right? You guys are the strongest of the strongest. I don’t care if it’s forbidden. There… there has to be a way!”
For a moment, they were silent as though reluctant to admit their lack of knowledge. Ace wilted, his buckling knees threatening to collapse once the severity of the situation settled in.
That is, until Lilia opened his mouth.
“… There is, actually.” he murmured. “But for every soul that moves here, another has to replace them.”
Some of the characters lit up, but the others remained skeptical.
“And I assume it’s for the sake of balance?” Vil mused, crossing his arms.
Lilia’s glance confirmed his suspicion.
“T-then, what are we waiting for?” In a burst of hope, Azul momentarily stopped sobbing. “Let’s sacrifice that person.”
“But who’s gonna be that person?” Jamil retorted.
Everyone fell quiet again, unwilling to be the lamb in the altar of your capricious existence.
“The NPCs ‘live’ when the story is moving.” Idia mumbled through the floating device. His shyness and reluctance for a face-to-face interaction was customary, but nobody could truly see the underworld his sanity was falling at a rapid pace. Still, it didn’t change the fact that he still wanted to see you living among them. Literally. “That means she has to play again if we want to sacrifice one of them.”
“I, for one, would be more than willing to help ‘convincing’ her, if that’s what it takes.” Jade simpered with his eyes closed and a hand over his chest.
“Oui! It’d be a splendid day to see her sublime face gracing us again. The sun would shine warmly, the flowers would grow tastefully, and the birds would chirp merrily!” Rook enthused, jabbing at Malleus’s inadvertent use of magic.
Riddle wiped his teary eyes with the sleeve of his uniform and straightened up.
“Seeing that our Player has slackened in her responsibility to watch over us, it is our duty to set her right.” he declared. “Heartslabyul students, I order you to find this person and bring him here!”
“I-I agree…!” Sebek piped up, still loud as always despite his trembling voice and runny nose. “I shall seize him and send him to that world at once!”
Ever the dutiful one, Silver gripped his baton and nodded. As long as it wasn’t murder without a cause, he’d gladly perform any task like a true knight would.
“Well, if Riddle ordered us like this, who are we to disobey him?” Cater laughed, trying to hide the shakiness of his voice.
Trey pushed his glasses, foggy from the upcoming tears.
“Indeed. But I won’t lie, this is something that I’m looking forward to carry out.”
“For once, you did something right, Ace!” Deuce beamed proudly.
“Oi!”
Jamil glanced at Kalim, who reluctantly nodded. He hated to see people throwing away their lives carelessly, after all the assassination attempts that he suffered through the story. But if it was for the sake of seeing you with them, who was he to stop them?
Floyd grinned happily, but the anger of being abandoned by you darkened his eyes.
“Once she gets here, I’ll be sure to give her a nice, long squeeze as a welcome~”
“Well, Leona-san?” Ruggie asked, crossing his hands behind his head. “Are we gonna boost their morale or something?”
Leona sighed, lacking the irritated exhaustion he usually had. Even he wasn’t immune to the hope that Lilia brought to them, no matter how annoying it was to trust him.
“You better not be disappointing us, Lilia.” he growled. “And you, too, Radish Sprout.”
“I don’t like this.” Jack murmured. “But if this is what it takes to make the Player fulfill her role again, then I’ll do my best to live up to the expectations!”
“I… I will join as well!” Epel stated, clenching his fists resolutely.
“Look, Brother!” Ortho chirped. “You managed to bring them all together. That’s so cool!”
Idia muttered something, but the younger boy was too engrossed in their touching cooperation to notice.
Sunlight finally dispersed the dark clouds, mirroring their spirit. Malleus took a step forward with his chin raised in determination.
“Then, I shall assist Lilia with the magic.”
You said you didn’t care about them?
Well, they would make you care.
1K notes · View notes
tommygrace · 4 months ago
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The people on YouTube are true fans of the show and what they say about the relationship between Tommy and Grace is beautiful. These are some of the comments:
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"He didn't have great day, but the seconds he sees her his face lights up. And the way he keeps caressing her face , it melts the heart. He only did this with Grace."
"Grace is so adorable in this scene, she's the only one I'll accept for Tommy."
"Grace face expressipns just show happy she is marrying to tommy. Smiling and chukling more often than before... The actress nailed the grace character so well. You can feel her love for tommy."
"The way he looks at her and this soft aspect of him that we only see when Grace is around ❤️❤️"
"Grace was Tommy’s last light."
"He was never like this with lizzie and all the other girls."
"Tommy never got that happiness again after Grace's death. No woman could make that again not even Lizzie. I'm so sad Grace died so soon. They had barely a few moments of happiness😢"
"I like how she jumps on him at the end. Such natural chemistry between these two actors. Their relationship really felt real."
"Finishing the series and watching it again, its crystal clear Grace was the love of his life. He was just never the same without her 😢 he was so in love with her, both of them."
"The way he look at her.."
"I love the fact that after getting the Sapphire he decided to get a nacklace crafted for 'Grace' and nobody else... She was always on his mind..."
"She’s so happy to see him omg I love them."
"Yes. Everybody's talking about Tommy being in love with her but Grace was so in love with him too. ❤"
"They are perfection. This scene is just absolute cathartic perfection. From the fact she RUNS to greet him to the way that Mary admonishes her like a Mother. Arrow House was so fucking happy once. This was the life they deserved, he arrives home dead on his feet after being held hostage and he doesn't give a fuck because he's home. The way she's so excited for the letter is contagious and he cares, he genuinely CARES. He's not sat there mutely as she talks to him, he doesn't stop her from talking or distract her or come onto her. He sits and listens. He's just infatuated with her the - 'yes I am. I am.' Then the good wife comment and he's just like 'No.' Don't want a good wife, I just want you. It's just such a raw, intimate moment and the thought that this happened every time she came home soothes my little broken heart. How anyone can say she wasn't the love of his life or the best thing that ever happened to him I have no clue. She gave up her entire life for him and they built an empire in those two short years. Killing her off was a travesty and such a waste of both the character and the actress. Tommy was made to be with Grace and when she died, he died with her. He never recovered. Not with Lizzie or with the children, nobody. On a cold, dark lonely night it will be back here that he goes. Not back to his wife."
"The way he looks at her when he comes in 😩🥺🥺 it was a bad day but he knew she was home waiting on him 🥰🥰"
"She brought out the good and saw him as a man despite his power and position. They loved the parts of each other no one else truly did. His face lights up when she’s around no matter what. She was the one for him, nice to see that soft side of him."
"One of my fovourite scenes. They look so happy, paceful, soft...I miss their relationship😍"
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"I really want her to come back... their chemistry is no joke... i want them to have their happily ever after."
"If Grace is in his arms then everything is alright for Tommy."
"I believe Grace's name is allegorical, since Tommy was the most happy n closest to peace while she was around him, which was for a very short time. The only 'grace' in his damned life."
"Thanks for uploading this scene. I loved when there were scenes of Grace and Tommy in their bedroom. I luv when Tommy said to Grace " come here" , so powerful, like I am your man and you are my woman. Also notice how that bedroom was set up so warm and romantic . The set crew really took time in creating this loving bedroom."
"She was his everything and his queen! He was at peace with her in his arms."
"So many people hating on Grace, but she was one of the few who called him out on his shit and snapped him out of his funk. She had seen him at his worst, when he was but a shell of a man striving to rise to the top. He was always most vulnerable around her and didn't bother hiding his true self because of this . The other women wouldn't have batted an eye at him, had he not been rich or influential."
"The change in him after 'tomorrow it will be just us'. He gives a little breath before calling her over like, 'just us' I've survived the day, now just the night and then 'just us'. Just us was all he ever wanted."
"This was the only time when he was at peace. With grace. The moment she died he was never the same."
"Man she is all he ever wanted. 🥺"
"When grace died Tommy was never really happy the rest of the show."
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"This was the again after her death its clear that he will never love again, he will never be the person he was when he had her😔."
"I love how her name was Grace, since grace is the one thing Tom needed in his life and made him graceful to others- and when Grace was gone, grace was also gone out of his heart."
"Those words, and the context of who is saying them, make this scene a flawless example of what makes a man and a woman, together, creating something that wasn't there before."
"He was so full of happiness and joy 🥹."
"0:53 "Promise me, hm? A wedding vow". It melts my heart when she asks this, being so in love."
"The acting is incredible, especially her being in love with him. It feels so real, and the piano music elevates this; it emphasises their intimacy. Her love is so honest and pure."
"This scene kills me every time. They were just perfection. That smile at 1:40. The negotiated dance. The softness in him 😭 why she had to die I’ll never know. She could have been such an incredible instrument in the show. Amazing actress and character."
"Adore this scene. So beautiful and sweet."
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I cried when she died , they were just perfect together. The only time Tommy was happy was with Grace."
"The part that killed me was after Grace was shot and she was dying in Tommy’s arms and they cut to a wide shot and we could see her almost caressing his back, soothing his pain as she died. Maybe it wasn’t intentional but, it was a very powerful touch before they cut away. Such a fantastic show…"
"Grace was his one and only❤…he was never the same without her."
"Their relationship from beginning to end gave me chills. They did so well with these characters and their chemistry and sexual tension."
"tommy explicitly said he doesn't believe in God, and confessing to grace in a church is something i perceived that she is the only one he believes in and will save him from his sins... grace is tommy's religion ❤️‍🔥"
"The chemistry between these two, Cillian Murphy and Annabelle Wallis, is electric. Fantastic actor & actress because I'm shocked they're not married in real life with how great this is. I wish they'd get more couple roles together! Another on-screen couple in recent times I've seen with this electric chemistry is Brandon Sklenar and Julia Schlaepfer in 1923, this stuff is mesmerizing to me."
"S1 is my all time favourite. Tommy and Grace were so special. This conversation was absolutely brilliant, pureness of their emotions (symbolised by the church) amidst the lies and dangers lurking over their heads. Her presence was heavily missed in s6.😢"
"Season 1 and 2 are the highlights of deep storytelling and fantastic writing. After that the story starts to get convoluted and it is the fantastic acting that keeps people hooked."
"A brilliant scene, simple yet melancholic. They spoke so succinctly, to the point that each and every word spoken is like its weight in gold. It's just so mesmerising."
"I think that’s the sweetest on screen kiss I’ve seen yet 🥲."
"I’m still so bitter about her death 😭 I know that Tommy isn’t meant to be happy, but I would’ve loved to see Grace’s character grow alongside Tommy’s. I also think that Grace, Ada, and Polly would’ve created an amazing bond and relationship. And they would’ve been lethal for the Peaky Blinders organization. When Mosley said to Tommy that he wanted to sleep with Lizzie when Tommy invited him over to Lizzie’s bday party ballet celebration, I’ve always wondered what Tommy’s reaction would’ve been if instead of Lizzie, it was Grace who Mosley wanted to sleep with. I’m sure he would’ve lost his marbles right then and there. Grace just brought out a different side of Tommy and I love seeing that contrast in a character (the good, the bad and the ugly ). Can’t wait for the movie, though! It’s going to be EPIC!"
"I want to cry, they were so pure when they allow their feelings to flow 💓😭💕".
"Grace and Tommy...A match made in heaven❤️."
"Tommy's swith was completly off after her death,he was never the same."
"I love so much these two together. ♥"
"I love them and miss them the most a lot."
"I loved every scene Tommy and Grace were with each other. They had great chemistry together. This couple could have had so much potential but instead the writer decided to break Tommy's heart and soul so early and make him live in hell for the rest of his life. 😭So sad."
"Poor Tommy she was perfect for him and her death tore him apart."
"I want to see them together, please give us a proper closure in the movie."
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"I think it was wrong to have Lizzie and Tommy together afterwards. Grace was the high standard. No other female character can replicate Tommy and Grace’s chemistry."
"Here it is shown that Grace is always going to be the great love of his life. His mind is so damaged that just imagining Grace's ghost brings him to a state of peace, because she is the only one who can make him feel better."
"When she embraced him I was ready to burst into tears. Just bring her back! 🥺."
"Maybe my heart broke all over again."
"She is the love of Tommy's life and the love for his life too. Tommy was a romantic guy who laughed, but because of the trauma of war he became a gangster to take the pressure and survive. He never loved this life, he lives like this because it is the only way. In addition to making him forget the terror of war, she was the only one to present an alternative (for 2x). He would be happy and could work with horses and cars legally without worry."
"i think this is the best scene in the entire show... I was very moved by it and i rarely get moved by anything...it captured beautifully how alone tom is ... opiates by the fire talking to his wife's ghost..i can't think of anything more lonely."
"0:55 his little smile when she starts to speak. so sad 💔."
"Grace is Tommy’s only love ❤️ I miss Grace so much 🥺🥺."
"True fooking love. No one can come close to Grace periodt. Give her a fooking role already".
"Look how relieved Tommy looked for a sec when he was embracing her 😥."
"I loved the chemistry between Tommy and Grace and I wanted to see more of Tommy and Grace and I was heartbroken when she died cause I wanted her to be with Tommy till the end of the series but sadly she had to die for the sake of storyline but still she’s my fav female character in the whole series. Tbh Annabelle is really so beautiful and gorgeous that she can make anyone fall in love with her".
"Lizzie is no where close to grace..I really wished she got to play a double role..."
"they were made for each other."
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"Best scene in the series ever. the most happiest, normal, and peaceful moment Tommy ever had."
"Admit it, we all wanted this wedding to happen as soon as he met grace."
"When the tune kicked in after revealing it was Grace. Amazing."
"4:02 lol tommy wanted to kiss her forever, Grace had to be like "enough" love their love."
"The happiest days of Thomas life!"
*The shelby family is so happy that day."
"Finally!! he really loved her i was afraid they are not gonna get married."
"Tooo much love in this episode ❤"
"Tommy was so lost after poor Grace died."
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This has to be one of the happiest moments in Tommy's life."
"Never saw Tommy happier and more complete than at this moment."
"His smile at 0.12 is ❤"
"Cillian Murphy said it best “There’s always a sense of healing when he’s with Grace, but that healing goes away very quickly”"
"I am so glad that someone posted this.. this scene is beautiful. For once Tommy is happy.. like really happy. It's nice that they showed one scene like this in the series. I really wanted to see that since they fell in love."
"Tommy loved his wife and son so much, poor guy lost his true happiness."
Dedicated to every Grace fan. People love them, just like all of us, Team Grace!
76 notes · View notes
northgazaupdates · 9 months ago
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Journalist Hossam Shabat responds to a problematic article about journalists in the west being unable to reach Gaza. Hossam writes,
The biggest problem is not Western journalists being unable to enter, but the fact that Western media doesn't respect and value Palestinian journalists. My colleagues and I risk our lives every day to report on this genocide. No one knows Gaza like we do, and no one understands the complexity of the situation like we do. If you care about what's happening in Gaza, you should amplify Palestinian voices. We don't need Western journalists to tell our stories; we are capable of telling and reporting on our own stories.
Context under the cut:
From the very beginning, Western journalists have neglected the people of Gaza. They focused on how resistance actions have impacted settlers, and mentioned Gaza in only the most reductive of terms. But now, as the scale of atrocities by the IOF finally becomes too great for them to ignore, these same journalists are crafting a new narrative: ‘We didn’t ignore Gaza because we don’t care, or because it was politically convenient to do so. We just couldn’t get there to report on it.’
This is a lie concocted under the weight of ever-fickle Western guilt. They deflect their accountability for creating IOF propaganda by claiming they were kept from reaching the area. However, even more than a lie, it is an insult to Gazan journalists—those still living and those murdered by the occupation.
Gazan journalists often have contacts outside of Gaza who could help them evacuate, but they chose to stay. They chose to stay and document the genocide against their people, and did so at immense personal cost. Montaser Al-Sawaf was injured and lost 50+ family members in a bombing attack, before he was bombed again by the occupation and left to slowly die in the street. Mahmoud Ziad Aliwa and Mohammed Saber Arab are still missing after being kidnapped by the IOF while reporting from Al-Shifa Hospital during the latest siege. Eshak Daour lost his brother just a few days ago.
But as they tried to share their footage and words with the world, they were ignored, in north Gaza especially. The world had no interest in the words of Gazans, but especially if they were Arabic-speaking. Rather than undertake the relatively simple task of finding a translation for Gazan sources, or contacting Gazan journalists directly in English (of which many of them speak at least a little), they were flat-out ignored. Only English-speaking journalists with massive social media followings received any acknowledgment, and even then it was extremely minimal.
The journalists of Gaza have always been there, they have always been speaking out and asking others to simply share their words. The implication that only western journalism counts as “real” journalism is insulting, degrading, imperialistic, unprofessional, dishonest, and cruel.
This blog was created due to uplift the words of north Gazans, which were not and often still are not reaching the rest of the world. We will continue sharing from people in north Gaza, but we ask that you, reader, do so as well. Do what western journalists have refused, and uplift the voices of people fighting for their survival in all of the Gaza Strip.
Many journalists post partly in English, but for those that don’t, Arabic speakers will often leave English translations in comment sections. You can also ask for someone to do a translation in the comment section, and often someone will reply. If they don’t, you can copy and paste Arabic text, or take screenshots and upload them into Google Translate. These are not perfect tools, but they give you some idea of what is being said. It’s better than simply not listening.
163 notes · View notes
nevadancitizen · 1 year ago
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-> (I'VE BEEN) DREAMING OF YOU
synopsis: könig comes into your reality.
word count: 1.2k
characters: könig, player! reader
trigger warnings: mention of canon-typical violence, maybe slightly obsessive könig oops lol
notes: self-aware cod au belongs to @puff0o0 , inspired by @simp4konig // i moved for college lol hopefully i'll be able to upload(?) more often + salf-aware aus are really my thing huh. my jam if you will
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It had been a week since König figured out he wasn’t real. 
At least, that’s what he approximated it to be. Time was tricky if he actually tried to count the seconds and minutes and hours. 
But when he stepped off the helicopter and trudged back into base, he knew he would at least have some sense of relief. Some sense of… realness, even though he knew he only existed through the wires of ethernet cables, or maybe even something as primitive as a CD.
König knew his boots tracked in mud and blood and maybe even guts, but he didn’t care. Everything would be wiped clean and be put on a new plate tomorrow for… he guessed they would be called the players, to eat. 
He shut the door to his quarters behind him and leaned against it, closing his eyes and sighing. He desperately wished he could tell someone, anyone, about what he had witnessed – what he knew to be true. 
He felt crazy. He felt blessed. He felt like a conspiracy theorist that was just re-inventing the idea that the whole world is a simulation – because it is! People re-invented ideas all the time, but there was nothing shameful in it. But if the rest of humanity (and for all he knew, humanity could only be KorTac and Specgru) oohed and aahed and said, “God, we live in a simulation? I’ve never heard that one before!” just to make him feel good, nothing would ever get done. But it still stung to know such a heavenly being existed and to keep such a huge secret. 
Of course he was talking about you, thinking about you. When did he not think of you, actually?
He felt almost hollow without you. Like you had given him warmth with your control – a raging bonfire he could only observe from a distance, but still felt the full heat of: as in, an actual heat in his chest whenever he felt his control slipping away, replaced with the security that came with being in your presence. And König didn’t hate it. Not at all. 
He didn’t even bother to shrug off his work equipment before he threw himself onto his bed. He turned over and swaddled himself with his blanket to try and emulate your warmth. It did nothing. 
It was a while before he fell asleep. And he had the strangest dream…
He was in your room. He had only caught glances of it, but here he was, tangled in your blankets and in your bed. 
And there you were. Sitting at your desk, typing away at your laptop. Your back was to him, but he could tell it was you. Even at this distance, you were so warm. 
You were wearing the big, chunky headphones you always wore when you played. He could hear quiet thumping bass coming from them. It was the only sound he could hear aside from your quick keystrokes. 
König slowly untangled himself from your blankets – he still had his boots on, the ones that had mud and blood and maybe even guts. Then he realized he had all of his work equipment on. 
He stood and surveyed his surroundings. Everything in your room was so… you. (Obviously. It was your room.)
His eyes snapped back to you when you took off your headphones. You pressed a button on the side to pause your music and then set them down. You stretched your arms above your head and let out a quiet groan as you leaned back. 
You looked so soft. So cute. Nothing like what König had seen through the screen. You had been slightly bitcrushed and pixelated, but now…
The warmth that blossomed in his chest was like no other. It spread out into his limbs, almost making him weak in the knees. His eyelids fluttered, but he forced them open to look at you, take in more of you. 
He tried to say your name softly, as to not startle you, but it came out choked and loud and awkward. His voice even cracked. 
You were so scared you nearly punched a hole through your monitor. You stood and turned, immediately grabbing a pair of scissors that were on your desk. 
Your hand shook as you pointed the pair of scissors at König. “T… take off the hood!”
König kept his feet planted firmly on the ground, even bending at the knee a little to be less threatening. He puts up his hands in a surrendering manner. “Schatz, no, it’s me. It’s König.”
“Shut up!” you barked. “I’m not – no way am I being killed or robbed or whatever by someone in cosplay!” Your eyes flit over his body, spotting a knife on his utility belt. “And give me your knife. Try anything and I’m – I’ll…” you glanced down at the pair of scissors (which you can’t really stab him with). “I’ll snip your dick off!” 
It honestly takes a bit of effort on König’s part not to laugh. Still, he slowly, carefully took the knife out of its holster and offered it to you, the blade pointed towards his chest. “Please, be careful.”
“I know how to handle knives,” you snapped. You put the pair of scissors back on your desk and took to pointing König’s knife at him. You took a tentative step closer, your jaw set. You reached a shaking hand out towards König’s face. “Don’t… move.”
"Mein Leibling.” König breathed out the words. “What are you doing?”
“The mask,” you said. “I’m taking it off. Then I’m calling the police.”
König just looked at you with wide eyes, his blue-grey eyes stark against his eyeblack. His eyebrows creased as he looked down at you, but said nothing. 
And then, König felt a blossoming warmth as his face was exposed for the first time in what felt like forever. 
His eyes fluttered shut as he felt your eyes rove over his face. Under the hood wasn’t a face: nothing except for his eyes, eyebrows, and a little bit of the surrounding skin. The rest of it was unloaded textures, a checkerboard of black and bright purple. 
“Schatz…” 
“König…”
König’s eyes opened as you said his name. You didn’t notice before, but his eyes were detailed, told a story. This wasn’t the king of the battlefield – this was König. Here, he wasn’t a killer, wasn’t someone who saws someone’s head off with a dull plastic knife and doesn’t even blink when the blood spurts out. He wasn’t the long-shot-drop-pop one-bullet-wonder. He was a man. 
König gently reached up and took your wrist and pulled your hand away from his hood. It fell back into place, covering up his checkerboard face. 
He looked down at you, his eyebrows still furrowed. He didn’t say anything. He couldn’t. 
“You’re…” you sighed – not disappointedly, but more surprised. “You’re actually him. You’re König.”
“I am,” König said simply. 
“Schatz,” you said. “What does that mean?”
König smiled down at you, even though he didn’t have a mouth. His eyes crinkled at the outsides. “Treasure.”
He gently let go of your wrist, his hand traveling up your arm until it came to your shoulder. His fingers brushed against your jaw, the rough texture of his gloves making you tense just the slightest bit. 
He whispers softly, like he’s afraid of you hearing his voice. “My treasured player.”
662 notes · View notes
alonetimelover · 1 year ago
Text
pairing: Harry Styles x physicist!reader
summary: The aftermath of the leak is hard on everybody in dr YN YSN's circle, but especially for her. The gossip, magazines, paparazzi and haters do not help the case.
warnings: hate speech, swearing
a/n: hi! so yes, this is a re-upload of the 3rd part of the physicist!reader. earlier this week tumblr wasn't working with me, not showing this on tags or even my own home page. and with that, i decided to post it again so maybe some more of you could know what's been happening in the world of physicist!reader. i hope you'll enjoy!
part 1 part 2 taglist
@celesteblack08
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The Sun
Oxford Is Firing The Famous 'Higgs Professor' and Harry Styles' Girlfriend Dr YN YSN
Written by John Addams
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The infamous and TikTok sensation dr YN YSN, lecturer at Oxford University, is being fired after intimate photos of her and boyfriend, Harry Styles, saw the light of the day.
Starting at the beginning, the relationship between two became a fact over a year ago, when dr YSN went viral for her explanation of the Higgs mechanism based on Harry Styles' music. As we got to know from their joined street interview for meetcutesnyc on Instagram, the relationship florished after meeting at their mutual friend's (Christopher Nolan) party. Dr YN YSN was the science consultant for the director's latest movie, Oppenheimer, and Harry starred in one of his films, Dunkirk - making it happen.
Everything was going smoothly till the morning of three days ago. YN's iCloud was hacked, revealing personal and intimate information about not only the owner but her boyfriend as well.
'Dean is furious,' says our source. 'He cannot believe that the best lecturer could be this reckless'.' After the posed question on whether the decision of firing could be announced any time soon, they said, 'it's just the matter of time. But it's going to be sooner rather than later. Oxford is going to lose a fair and talented professor, but it is not its fault. Someone was the author of those, let's say information that was exposed. And it's going to be their fault entirely.'
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harrysmoustache
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liked by hArrysbtch, harryupdates and 23 482 others
harrysmoustache Harry and YN couldn't leave the restaurant safely because a bunch of paps and 'fans' showed up at the location. Not only was it physically dangerous, but the things that were spoken towards (mostly) YN were disgusting. Calling her names and ready to fire her on the spot because of the PRIVATE PHOTOS she took with her boyfriend, which then someone ILLIGALY POSTED ONLINE after HACKING HER ICLOUD. Did y'all forget about TREAT PEOPLE WITH KINDNESS?????
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harrysmoustache and don't make me start on that bullshit that the sun did... RIDICULOUS
harryupdates After all those years, and all those situations that he went through, I'm still surprised that people can be this cruel to him and people that he loves
hArrysbtch they hatin' my girl cause of some sexy photos... bastards
hArrysbtch why would they care what she does after Uni hours??? it's none of your business
scienceandharstyles it's heartbreaking to see a person that gives others the world and shares her knowledge and wears her heart on her sleeve being treated like garbage
harrymylove those were not harry fans
stylesbabie monstrosity
user56 why do y'all care for her this much??? jezz..
⤷ hArrysbtch maybe because she's a good human being treated like the worst person alive just because she snapped a few photos of her and her boyfriend
⤷ user56 wouldn't that be the consequences of her own actions?
⤷ hArrysbtch nope. her phone was hacked. how many times you take photos of yourself and think 'oh god, what if my gonna be hacked and this will be posted?'
⤷ harrysmoustache hArrysbtch ohhh, babes!!! you closed that haters mouth!!!!
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drynysn
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liked by harrystyles, harryupdates and 738 492 others
drynysn During one of my latest lectures one of the students asked about accuracy in Sci-Fi movies, so I decided to start a little series of: Is this SCIENCE or just FICTION? Firstly, we'd look into the scene from Spider-Man 2 (2004). The scene where Peter Parker (Spider-Man) is stopping the train from its eventual crash. he shot multiple web lines, then they stretched and didn't break. One would say it is not possible. But! From the way the scene is shown to us, we are able to estimate how strong the web needed to be for it to happen. After looking up the train's mass, you can estimate its initial velocity (how far it can go per hour, so km/h) by seeing exactly how long it takes to pass the city blocks. (1)
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drynysn (2) You can look up, measure, the distance over the webbing stretches, and then estimate its diameter . You can also count the number of web lines. NOW, we end up with a tensile (fancy way of saying elastic) strength for the webbing that has to be about 1 000 megapascals (mega meaning milion) which is equivalent to about 102 036 704 kilograms per square metre (which is 145 000 lbs/square inch - for you, my American friends on here).
drynysn (3) What is absolutely mind-blowing is the fact that actual spider silk has a tensile strength of 1 200 megapascals. So, if Spider-Man's webbing would be anyway that strong, that scene was very, very realistic. Rating it 9/10. What scene would you like to see next?
scienceandharstyles that is so informative and making this movie even more iconic!! Did you do all the equations by yourself, dr YSN?
⤷ drynysn Yes, I did! Took me some time to analyse the scene but it was worth it!
harryupdates oh, i need to rewatch this movie immediately!!!
harryismylife could the next scene be the one from The Avengers where Mjolnir after contacting Cap's shield makes that blue light? is that even possible?
⤷ drynysn that's a great scene! i'll look over it!
hArrysbtch i love the little explanations in brackets! i didn't need to look up the tensile thingy!
harrysmoustache you're telling me the scene i was 100% sure was as fake as my eyelashes is true???
user45 maybe you should try explaining showing of that body of yours
user75 is this the new way to make money after being fired?
user281 unemployment doesn't suit you but the consequences of your actions finally caught up with you
user374 i think you should start posting one of those photos the sun included in their article - you'll get more attention
comments to this post have been disabled
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harryupdates
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liked by hArrysbtch, harrymoustache nad 54 292 others
harryupdates HARRY nad DR YN spotted in a small restaurant in Oxford (i'm disabling the comments cause i don't want to deal with the haters)
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hArrysbtch MY PARENTS!!!!!!!! ARE BACK AFTER THE WEEKS OF DRAUGHT!!!!!
hArrysbtch and they look goooood
harrysmoustache i missed them so much..
stylesbabie yn looks so tired and sad
⤷ hArrysbtch it's just one phot of one moment
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harrystyles via close friends IG story
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londonboyharry
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liked by harryupdates nad 14 302 others
londoboyharry went to oxford to bump into harry. it's better! i met dr yn ysn, drank coffee with her, talked and laughed my ass off! she is the funniest, kindest and most down to earth person i've ever met. also, after i asked her about all the things that were happening around her, she just said 'what things?' WITH A SMIRK ON HER FACE, SIPPING HER LITTLE AMERICANO AND BEING UNBOTHERED
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harryupdates im so happy that she gives no damn to those people online
hArrysbtch I LOVE HER
harrymoustache the moment the legend the IT girl
stylesbabie happy for you!!!
harrysmylife who would want to meet harry when you can meet dr yn ysn?
scienceandharstyles best woman alive
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scienceandharstyles
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liked by drynysn, harrystyles and 56 482 others
scienceandharstyles WE GRADUATED OXFORD!!! to anybody who said there was no way to incorporating pop culture with a biology degree? eat shit! i wrote the whole masters based on musicians' impact on fans' hormonal production. hehe. ALSO, it would not be possible withouth the best teacher, academic inspiration, and person I've ever met - dr YN YSN. thank you!
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drynysn MADELINE, I am so proud of you. It would be not possible without your persisatnce and will to find solutions and answers. This is all yours!
harrystyles Congratulations, Madeline! H, xx.
harryupdates congrats maddie!!
stylesbabie very very proud
harrysmoustache did you perhaps use harry as an example in your work?
⤷ scienceandharstyles YES, I did. Only positive affect of his voice, music and visuals...
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oxford_uni
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liked by harrystyles, harryupdates and 748 392 others
oxford_uni Acknowledging the upheaval around one of our lecturers - dr YN YSN, the Chancellor of Oxford University and the Dean of The Department of Physics decided to release the joined statement:
Refuting the words ans statements made by publishers not connected to our University, we would like to inform anybody in concern that one of our grates lecturers dr YN YSN is not decruited. The matter of private life is not concern of the University authority, even more when the said privacy was bridged. At this place, we would like to wish luck during dr YN YSN' s new path - becoming a professor.
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harrystyles <3
harryupdates I KNEW IT
hArrysbtch EAT SHIT THE SUN, EAT SHIT JOHN ADDAMS
harrysmoustache HAHHAHAHAHAHA I KNEW IT !!!!!! BABY THERE WAS NO WAY THEY WOULD FIRE HER
stylesbabie thank god! there is still hope for this world
scienceandharstyles Chancellor and Dean with the best decision ever made
harrysmylife now haters what??? ha??
harrysfan87 i believed in you guys i did
londonboyharry becoming a professor???? good luck yn!!!
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yourinstagram
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liked by harrystyles, annetwist and 275 others
yourinstagram There was no better thing that happened to me than meeting you. You support means the world. I love you forever.
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harrystyles Loving you is the greatest honour of all time, my heart <3
annetwist My favourite girl in the world! (besides my daughter)
⤷ gemmastyles Thanks for clarifying, mum
gemmastyles My sister from another mister!
yourbestfriend We need to finally meet up!
⤷ yourinstagram yessss!
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harrystyles
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liked by yourinstagram, harryupdates, annetwist and 10 746 646 others
harrystyles You're just finishing one of your latest publications on the way to becoming a professor. I couldn't have been more proud and honoured to accompany you during this time.
view all 98 757 comments
yourinstagram I love you I love you I love you
annetwist Our smart professor. <3
harryupdates ohhhhhh *melting*
hArrysbtch I'll never get over him posting her on here
harrysmoustache we are back to normal, baby!!!
scienceandharstyles professor YN YSN sounds amazing
harrysmylife BEST. COUPLE. EVER.
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a/n: did you like the way it turned out?
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cazzyf1 · 3 months ago
Text
The other day on my tiktok I created a simple post about how James Hunt is more than just the Playboy persona that is associated with him. This flew over someone's head who commented about how he was a Playboy. I responded explaining the point of the video but instead they doubled down saying that James didn't care about F1 only about partying.
So today I went through some of my books and gathered a load of quotes to show the James Hunt that most people do not know about, the one outside of the Playboy perception. I've posted it on tiktok but figured I'll upload it here as well so the true James Hunt can reach more people and slowly we can dismantle the reputation 'Rush' gave him ❤️
TW: Depression, unhealthy coping mechanisms/addictions
When you think of James Hunt you think of the 'playboy'. The guy who partied, drank lots, took drugs and slept with lots of women. Its true he did that, and a lot but to dismiss him as just that is wrong. He was a good driver, a person who tried his best, a kind man who cared for human & animal rights.
The next few slides I've compiled quotes from a few books and website to show what kind of person he actually was and what he went through in life and that less people will dismiss him as just a Playboy.
James Hunt's first marriage was rocky because James was already very involved in his addictions and he knew he didn't love Susy because he felt that he wasn't capable of love. But he felt responsible for her and wanted to look after her. Here is his own opinion from his book ->
"It was really THE problem. I thought that marriage was what I wanted and needed to give me a nice stable and quiet home life, but in fact it wasn't and the key mistake was mine. I really wanted to go racing on my own, and it wasn't much fun for Susy to sit at home and wait for me all that time. It was also a terrible hassle for her to come racing because race meetings were probably the most relaxing time in my schedule. The rest of the time you tend to be leaping on aeroplanes once a day and that made it even worse because it's bad enough organizing one person to get on an aeroplane. Organizing two gets to be twice as much hassle. It got to the point where it was a problem for Susy to come travelling and a hell of a deal for her to stay at home. It was making life miserable in the extreme for her and since I felt responsible for her it was making me miserable too. So we had agreed to split up and then Richard Burton came along and solved all the problems. We had had an immensely successful marriage because I learnt an awful lot about myself and life and I think Susy did too. We all ended up happy, anyway, which is more than can be said for a lot of marriages" - p14 Against All Odds
Much is said about James Hunt and the ladies he kept company, and without knowing anything about James you might assume the worst, but here's some quotes about what he was actually like with the ladies ->
"I don't usually have sex before a race because I am very definitely concentrating -I find that it is the communication between two people that makes it worth- while, and before a race I am pretty uncommunicative. However, if say I have an hour or so to spare before dinner on the night before a race then I can enjoy the physical release. But I will only do it with someone who is fully understanding" - p15 Against All Odds
"He was always attentive to his partners needs. Indeed much of his satisfaction came from giving pleasure. The only problem, some of them confessed, was that his desire to please often out-stripped their needs" - p264 James Hunt: The Biography
"I was sure he was gay, because he never made a move on me for so long" - p278 Jane Birbeck, long time partner, James Hunt: The Biography
"He missed the actual skirmish - he was inside getting drinks at the bar - but had to be forcibly restrained from going after the policeman who hit his girlfriend" - p284 James Hunt: The Biography
James Hunt had many affairs in his time, because he had become an addict to many things including women (more on this later) He was aware of his and it plagued James that he couldn't control it ->
"One evening she returned to their London home to find James in tears. He was tormented by feelings of guilt caused by his lust for other women. He confessed the full extent of his unfaithfulness, that it was unfair to her and that for her sake they couldn't remain a couple. It wasn't that he was bored with her, but that his desire for other women was insatiable and uncontrollable. He held Jane in his arms and they both wept" - p320
One thing that helped James in his life time was his love for animals especially his pet dog Oscar. Here are some quotes about his love for animals and how far he would go to help protect them ->
"I think in a way Oscar was the child James never had at that stage. He was a remarkable dog, no question, but James thought a lot about animals and their requirements and was very concerned about their needs. He gave Oscar the very best treatment and also was keenly intrested in the welfare of other dogs. He would look at a dog, wonder if it's owner was treating it well and bringing it up properly and if the dog was getting everything out of life that it could" - p281
"Before he came to know James better, the journalist Nigel Roebuck was pleasantly surprised by an incident involvinged stray dog. It was late in the evening after a Grand Prix and tha teams were packing up to leave when James, while talking to Roebuck, saw the dog wandering around the paddock, shiver-ing and obviously very hungry. Roebuck, also sensitive to the needs of an animal in distress, went with James to several of the team motorhomes where they got food and fed the dog. But that wasn't the end of it as far as James was concerned. He insisted that they should take the dog up to the race control centre.
Roebuck: 'He took the dog in there and would not leave until he was sure it would be looked after. James actually made this official sign a piece of paper saying he would take care of the dog and see that it was housed and properly cared for. I was very impressed with this. James was probably one of only a handful of people on this entire planet who would even give that sort of thing a second thought." - p281
"He also thought the wild animals residing on his estate should be left alone. If vermin had to be controlled it should be done in the most humane way possible, and he strongly dissaproved of blood sports. The very thought of fox hunting he found horrible and he vowed not to allow it on his property" - p308
James was also incredibly caring towards the young people in his life such as his sons and his younger siblings. Here’s an extract from his first GF about James and his siblings ->
".. the way he expressed his concern for the emotional youngest members of his family:
He really enjoyed looking after them, and just seeing the way the behaved with his little brothers and sisters you knew was instinctive in him. He was always going to be a good father.
One evening he invited her home where he was babysitting Jo Jo, Dave and Tim. When James had tucked them in he left Ping to read them a bedtime story. When Ping came downstairs James asked her if she had helped them say their prayers. When I said no, James said: "Right. You've missed out hugely there. Come on, we'd better go and do it." So they did. His attitude was that he was taught to do that by his parents and it simply had to be done.'
But he also practised what he preached, and he believed in the power of prayer. In the troubled years to come James would pray to God for strength and help, and he eventually passed on the bedtime prayer ritual to his own two boys, to whom he became completely devoted.
During his time with Ping he had talked about having children, and she thinks fatherhood earlier in his life would have prevented James from sinking into his period of decadence.
I felt so sorry for him then because I knew underneath it wasn't the real James doing this. I think he was trying to make life happy, the wrong way. If he had settled down earlier, had a more normal home life with children of his own when he was younger, one could have seen a totally different James.' - p26
James Hunt cared for human rights especially taking a stand against the Apartheids in South Africa. The Apartheids in short was a system of racial segregation. In protest most sports were not going to South Africa but Formula One still was, and James Hunt made it clear his thoughts
->
“We were once covering the South African Grand Prix during the days of apartheid. All of a sudden, and for no particular reason, he launched into an attack on apartheid.
“It was nothing to do with the Grand Prix, nor would it do British-South African relations any good. Our producer pushed a piece of paper across saying: ‘Talk about the race!’
“And then James blurted out on air: ‘Thank God we’re not actually there!”
But simply calling out Apartheid on the air wasn’t enough for Hunt. He sought to have his race commentaries blocked from being broadcast in South Africa, but was unsuccessful.
When that didn’t work, he instead — and secretly — gave financial support from his income as a race broadcaster to groups struggling to end Apartheid in South Africa."
"His deeply compassionate and loving nature was something that, unfortunately, wasn't adequately conveyed to the public, who only ever heard about the sensational side of James Hunt" - p282 John Watson
As mentioned earlier James Hunt was an addict. His playboy lifestyle was his addictions and this is all rooted back to the fact that James Hunt had depression which grew stronger and stronger. He relied on his additions to get rid of his depression which meant he kept doing more and more. Here are some quotes about his struggle with it and eventually how he overcame it ->
"At home James became increasingly introverted, uncommunicative and reclusive. He gave up golf and spent more and more of his time in the aviary tending his budgies. While the parties continued he would often leave the guests to Sarah and closet himself in the aviary for hours on end.
It became obvious that James was very troubled, but only Sarah and his closest friends knew the full extent of the anguish and despair James suffered during his bouts with what he called his 'dippers'.
Black dog' was the term Winston Churchill used for the recurring 'depressions which afflicted him throughout his life. Bubbles Horsley thinks James was 'born with a "black dog" on his shoulder. His racing pushed the "dog" away far enough so that it was no longer visible. But underneath that wonderful joie de vivre, the laughter and enjoying life, he was given to black moods. He was fearful of them and maybe it was that fear that drove him on. Perhaps without it he would never have been World Champion.
'And I think after the initial "honeymoon" of retirement from racing the black dog came and sat on his shoulder and wouldnt go away. So he became more fearful and sought distraction in various ways, through sex and drink and drugs and rock and roll, as it were." - p323
"At home Sarah watched her husband's condition worsen and desperately sought to help him. She thought his depressiond might partly be due to a chemical imbalance that James was born with, a theory that James explored himself. Then, too, to keep his dippers at bay he consumed too much alcohol and marijuana, both of which can temporarily bring relief but over the long term on have depressive effects.
Like others, Sarah felt that another reason for his 'dippers' might have been because he cut off his emotions early in his life and never learned how to open up to people, or to need them. He was essentially a lonely man and his inability to form close relationships made him despair. His depressions further deadened his feelings, and when he was unable to respond emotionally to marriage and children he grew progressively more despondent.
Sarah: 'He was at war with himself. His depressions became Intolerable and towards the end he stopped trying to fight them coming on because he knew they would take over for two days or week. His face would go black and he would take to his bed and stay there, even on Christmas Day. He'd gone to bed two days beforehand and we had Christmas stockings for the boys. I said, Come on, Beast, the boys are waiting." And he said, "Beast, i can't do it." And he was crying" - p333
"When James felt a "dipper" coming on he would go on two- or three-day benders, mostly drinking vodka. He would just keep going and going, which was always a bit terrifying, and after these deep, dark blank days he would suffer real self-loathing. He could forget his trouble with drink, but it always came back.
For many years trying to get rid of his depression was his major concern, which is why he got the budgerigars. He thought it would be such a huge amount of effort that it would distract him and they became an obsession rather than a hobby. He would sit in the aviary for hours, but he would come back still in the grip of gloom. And for a long time he was so down it was very hard to even converse with him." - p326
"He tried different treatments acupuncture, Chinese herbal medicine and looked into every possible theory. He went to different healers, therapists, psychologists, psychiatrists, psychoanalysts, the lot, to try and find the root of his depression. And in the end he cracked it" - p337
"He began to become more diet-conscious and to eat healthy foods. He also consumed information, in books and magazines, on overcoming addictions, and sought more professional help.
He knew he should stop smoking cigarettes and reduce his marijuana consumption, and he told some friends he thought he might be an alcoholic. He worried that his need for women was another form of addiction and feared he might contract AIDS and infect someone else.
John Hogan: 'So he stopped it all. Straightened himself out by absolute willpower. The strength of character of the man enabled him to get out of it. He cut out the cigarettes, the dope and drugs. the booze and the womanising and his sense of priorities became more well-balanced.' - p338
As he started healing himself of his addictions he became serious about F1 again. He always cared for the sport, doing everything he could to race when he was younger and now though he was retired he still commentated and took part in other ways to stay close to the sport ->
"James became serious about strengthening his position in the media side of Formula 1 racing. He took on an internationally syndicated newspaper column and spent many hours gathering information for it. Working with a journalist he applied himself conscientiously to making sure that every word was written to his satisfaction" - p338
James started to heal his relationships as well, becoming an amazing parent to his two boys and finally meeting a woman who helped him feel loved and be able to love after so long of not being able to ->
"The boys were real handfuls to look after but he was awfully good with them and he really fathered and mothered them extremely well. He was always up early in the morning cooking their breakfast and then the four of us would go off salmon fishing. James would fish properly and I would fool around fishing with the youngsters. And then in the evening we used to settle down and he would tell them stories." - p343
A letter James sent to his girlfriend Helen:
"I went to the parents' 50th in a totally negative frame of mind, feeling very much an outsider and wanting the floor to swallow me up. As the day went on, although I remained 'out- side', I could see and feel lots of generous, undemanding love around me. Something changed for me there with my family. Everyone was exuding love and I saw the wonder of it and want to be part of it, but firstly with you.
I realise now that the feeling of not being loved as a child made me close up to any incoming love projected onto me. I do see that I cannot live on without love. You brought it home to me when you pointed out how well I'm doing with the boys. Well I have had to work at that and I've got better at it and I have to do it with you. You are the girl of my dreams. Without you I have no future. I want to make you happy and continue to do so until I die.
All my love for the love of my life,
James"
- p350
Finally James was happy. He was healed from his addictions, in a healthy relationship, had two lovely sons and a job he loved. And best of all he was able to be open with Helen ->
"James confessed to Helen that he was unable to be faithful to anyone in the past because sex was for him just another addiction and he needed women to get his highs. He disliked social gatherings and only had parties or went to them to pick up women. Helen was willing to forgive and forget what went on before, but told him she wouldn't tolerate it in their relationship and he agreed to be faithful to her." - p350
Helen went away on a girls holiday before her and James were going to start trying for children. James proposed to her over the phone on the holiday to which she said yes. But she would never see her finance because he passed away from a heart attack. Unfortunately the previous life he lead caught up to him.
Thank you for reading all of this and I hope you now know more about James Hunt than you already did! It's sad that James is best known now for his unhealthy coping mechanisms for his depression, especially with the film 'Rush' romanticising it. But even if just one person reads all of this it means one more person knows the truth of James Hunt and that makes it worth it ❤️
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blippymilk · 1 year ago
Text
Do You Have Something to Tell Me?
Veneer x GN!Reader
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Summary: You’re a normal teen in Mount Rageous, and the biggest Veneer fan known to man. Everybody that knows you knows it too. Unfortunately it’s highly unlikely to date the celebrity of your dreams…unintentionally.
A/N: I’m working on the request but I’ve had this for a bit so I finished it today and uploaded it for the time being.Also please forgive me if I use a certain amount of pronouns. With other content I’ve made before I’ve usually made female reader content so if I say she, as in referring to you please forgive me.
Happy New Years 🥳🎉
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“Seriously (____)?” one of your friends side eyed you as as you burst out in giggles in response. You had invited your two best friends over (Liliana and Romar) for your annual two night sleepovers, and currently you were killing time by watching Veneer and Velvet’s (mostly Veneer) latest concert footage. Well not really killing time according to you, it was a way of life.
“You seriously brought us over here to watch you drool over Veneer?” Liliana continued as your giggling came to a halt. “I did not invite you over here for that. Especially since I am watching Veneer AND Velvet, get it straight guys.” You replied as Romar got up and came over to your bed where you were watching on your MacBook. “Sweetie you literally zoomed in on him and cropped his sister out…” you started kicking your feet and giggling again. “This is insane, I’ve never met anyone with such an obsession over anybody ever. You don’t even pay your boyfriend this much attention.” Liliana said and Romar agreed. “Who?” You said still staring at the screen as your friends both leaned back and cocked an eyebrow at you. “Oh, Jalen…him…right.” You sighed closing your laptop.
It was silent for a while before anyone spoke again. “How about we do our favorite activity to do when we’re all together?” Romar asked as you and Liliana perked up. “SHOPPING!” You all shouted in unison.
________________________________________________________
“Let’s do a challenge guys.” You said to your friends as you all entered the Mount Rageous Mall. “Let’s put outfits together with a budget, a timer, and a person to customize.” You said as your friends agreed. “Bet. But where will we get the details from?” Liliana asked. “A generator or something.” Romar grabbed his phone and typed in a few things. The results ended up being: a budget of 35$, 40 minutes, and Romar got you, you got Liliana, and Liliana got Romar.
“On a count of three���” Liliana started, suddenly both of you almost fell over with the quick take off of Romar running through the mall. “HEY! WE’RE NOT done y-yet…and he’s gone.” She said as you both simultaneously face palmed and took off two different directions.
Your first stop was a store that was highly underrated in your opinion. It had great and reasonably priced outfits and none of your friends knew about it (yes you were gatekeeping but who cares). You ran all up and down the store for something Liliana might like. ‘Her favorite color is green, that’s a start’ you thought. You finally found a green top in her size and were now looking for some bottoms. You looked at the timer ‘32 minutes left’. You had to hurry and find some bottoms because more people started to enter the store. ‘Huh, guess this store’s not too underrated anymo-” your thoughts were cut short as you noticed someone running at the same pace towards you, and quite literally collided with them.
‘Sh*t that hurt’. The person you collided into let out a sort of high pitched “OW” that was very dramatic and dragged out. He almost sounded like…no. You sat up planning to apologize to the person, hoping it would roll over and you could be on your way. After all you only had 29 minutes left to checkout then hit up the accessory store.
“I’m sorr-”
“Ow, what the hell’s wrong with you?”
That shut you up real quick. What weren’t about to do was apologize to a blockhead. There was something weird about the way he responded. His high pitched voice had deepened when he came to his senses. “Excuse me?” You said standing up as he did too. The guy had a purple hoodie on covering his hair, but left some strands of it hanging, which was green. He had on glasses covering his eyes, pale white skin, and purple lipstick. He almost reminded of someone but you couldn’t put your finger on it.
“You should watch where you’re going next time.” The boy said dusting himself off. Now you were getting angry and the guy stuttered a bit. “Wait that’s not what I-” “Who do you think you are?” You blurted out.
“I was just saying…”
“Well maybe if you’d stop running your mouth every three seconds, your future altercations could be less painful.” And with that you grabbed your items off the floor, and made your way to the checkout leaving the boy stunned.
________________________________________________________
After hitting up the accessory store you and your friends had planned to meet up in the food court. “I seriously think I won this, like no joke.” Romar said. “Absolutely not it was me!” Liliana said shaking him. “I don’t know Lili, the outfit I picked out for you was kinda cute.” You said as you three went back and forth.
“Y’all are exhausting and I’m hungry, let’s eat.” Romar said and the disagreement was over as you three frantically traced the smells in the food court. Once in line you told your friends about the interaction with the rude guy you’d met in the store you went to. “Girl I woulda beat his as*” Lili said getting rowdy. “Uh we don’t condone violence over here mam.” Romar laughed as you two chuckled.
Once you ordered Romar offered to wait for everyone’s food and Lili took a phone call. You decided to sit down at a empty table and scroll through social media to kill time. You had scrolled endlessly for a few minutes before a Veneer edit popped up on your for you page. You stopped and watched it again, and again, and again, and maybe another time.
It’s only when a sudden voice snapped you out of your daydream, “Hey.” You jumped quickly and looked where the voice was coming from. It was that rude dude from the store earlier behind you. Rolling your eyes you quickly got up to leave but he stopped you, “Wait please don’t go.” He said. ‘He thinks I’m really gonna stay after the way he was talking to me earlier’ you thought, but you did stay.
You looked up at him waiting for him to speak again, you also noticed him eyeing your phone. The Veneer edit was still on repeat. ‘How embarrassing’ you turned your phone off and laughed nervously. You wondered if he had been behind you when you had the edit on loop, or if you were almost drooling or flustered at all.
“What is it?” You asked him as he turned his attention back to you. “Oh right um,” he sat down in the chair across from you, “I just wanted to apologize for earlier. I don’t usually act that way I actually felt really bad.” He said as you eyed him, like you were scanning him. “I’m so serious, like what I was saying I didn’t mean for it to come out like that. I have a lot of things to think about right now and I guess I didn’t think too hard on how to approach the situation.” He continued. You “scanned” him even more, he seemed sincere.
Suddenly your face softened and you could to tell his worry dropped a little too. “It’s ok I get it, I’m sorry for not hearing you out I was just in a rush.” He smiled a bit at this. “So what’s your name?” He asked. “I’m (____). What about you?” You asked. “Oh I’m V-Victor.” He said almost as if he was thinking too hard. “Nice to meet you Victor.” “You too.” “So do you live around here?” You two were in such deep conversation you didn’t see your friends staring you and this boy down until the had to frantically wave at you. You let them know you’d be there soon with your face and they took off somewhere in a hurry. Actually a couple people did, there was a little crowd forming at the front of the mall.
“What’s going on?” You said looking at the front, mid conversation. Victor looked almost panicked for a moment but calmed his face. “Not sure but I think I have to get going.” He said grabbing his bags. “Ok I get it, do you mind if I ask you one more thing though?” you asked. “Hit me.” He replied. “Why are you wearing glasses, can I see your eyes before you go?” You chuckled as he did the same. “Not this time, maybe another time.” He smiled at you, grabbed his last bag, and just like that he was gone.
‘Another time?’ You thought. He’s gotta be stupid there’s like a one in a thousand chance you’ll ever run into him again at Mount Rageous. You looked down at your phone and on top of it laid a piece of paper. You opened it to find a note: “Call me sometime? ;)” with a phone number under it and Victor’s name. He was quick with it.
Was he flirting with you? Why else would he put a winky face. ‘Little does he know, I’m loyal to my boyfriend’ you thought. “And my future husband Veneer.” You thought out loud before quickly closing your mouth and hoping nobody heard you. That’s when you realized more than half of the people at the food court was gone.
Suddenly Lili came up to you and grabbed your hand, “Come on come on! (Name) you will not believe what’s happening!” She sqeauled. “What? Just tell me!” You shouted while she dragged you to the front of the mall. “No you have to see it for yourself.” She said. “Nope,” you stopped and pulled your arm back, “I won’t go until you tell me what it is.” You tried being stubborn and it was working, Lili’s eye twitched a bit. “Fine! You wanna know so bad, it’s Velvet!” She sqeauled loosing her composer. “Velvet? As in-” “THE Velvet! Superstar and sibling to your man Veneer yes!” But you had only heard up to the Veneer part because you took off.
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256 notes · View notes
sunnyie-eve · 11 days ago
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47 | Chaos
Series: Unexpected
Paring: (Matt Sturniolo x OFC Brock!) (Chris Sturniolo x OFC Brock!)
Word Count: 1k
Warnings: telling secrets
| MASTERLIST |
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"Guys it's time! He's back!" Dani shouts looking over at Chris.
"Me." He smiles so they both yell, "I hate using my last name when I'm alone. You hear Sturniolo, you expect three people." He explains to her.
"Not this time."
"Just me." He smiles.
"I already did the other two and now I'm doing you again."
Chris nods his head before chuckling a bit, "Crazy wording, Dani."
"I-, Okay, sorry. That's what she said. No, like, I'm..." She was lost for words not knowing how to fix what she said.
"I don't think there's any recovering from that one." Chris tells her as she just stares at him.
"Only if they knew." Dani smiles, "That's funny for us."
"Do we tell?" He makes a face then glances at the camera raising his eyebrows.
"I don't care." She says not caring anymore honestly.
"Really?" He was surprised, "Is that smart? Fuck it." He thinks barely for a second.
"Before we cause chaos, I got you a drink." She pulls out a Pepsi for him.
"This will help." He takes it from her.
"I know it will." They both laugh..
"Are you ready?" He looks at her, "I can't believe we're actually about to tell everyone our business."
"Yeah, but people  wanna know what happened between us."
"It's mainly because of that one joke I said when we filmed at your parents house." He points out, "That was an inappropriate joke to tell a friend." He says what he read many times, "But we laugh about it. The only reason I don't want to is you'll get hate."
"Dude, too late." She laughs at him, "People already hate me."
"Hopefully people will realize that we are completely fine after what happened." Chris says before taking a breath in, "So I asked Dani out in front of her parents. I put her in the spotlight when we were all waiting for dinner." Chris tells the viewers, "And I'm still sorry for that." He looks at Dani.
She nods her head, "So I had to take him outside." She turns her head to look at him.
"Yeah, and then you turned me down." He nods his head before looking at her again and she shrugs her shoulders, "Wow." He knew she was playing with him.
"But we joke about it now." Dani tells the viewers pulling out cups for the sodas.
"You fit that whole can in there?" Chris was shocked because he failed at doing it.
"That's what she said. Ohh that was good." She laughs at herself.
"You were way too proud of that." He laughs at her.
"But like I said, you missed your shot."
Chris laughs, "Don't remind me."
"We work better this way." She takes a sip of her drink.
"We really do." He agrees and entirely means it.
"Yep. Chaotic duo."
"I prefer Datt." He pours the rest of his soda into his cup causing Dani to snap her heads towards him.
"Hey. Hey!" She gives him a look.
"Just saying." He shrugs his shoulders now.
"Hey. Let's not. Okay."
"Even in a platonic way y'all are soulmates." He tells her.
"Okay, but let's not do this because viewers would lose it more than what they just found out from us. And nothing is even going on with him and nothing never has unlike us." She explains before they wrap up the video.
Getting back home, Dani goes to take a shower so she could relax for the rest of the day. Afterwards she dressed in a pajama set to be comfy then goes to Matt's room to see what he was doing. As soon as she walked in, Matt paused his game to look over at her.
"Aww, cute pajamas. All teddy bears. What are you ten?" He laughs so she grabs his pillow off his bed to hit him with. "I said cute." He takes the pillow from her.
"And that I'm ten years old." She adds before plopping onto his bed then falling back.
"Anyways, how was it with Chris?" He gets up to sit next to her on his bed.
"When it gets uploaded people are gonna go crazy..." She gives him a smile.
"Why?" He gives her a look.
"Umm, we told everyone that Chris asked me out in the past." She watches his face, "I'm just tired of everyone asking what happened since we all keep talking about it. Sooo, I just decided to tell them. Chris didn't want to because of the hate I will get but I already get it so oh well."
"Was that smart? I think you might get more hate for saying no than actually if you said yes."
Dani shrugs her shoulders, "I'm gonna get hate as long as I know you guys. I don't care anymore."
"I want you to get as little as possible though and now it's gonna sky rocket."
Dani closed the distance between the in one smooth motion, grabbing the front of his shirt and pulling him down to her. The surprise on his face quickly melted into something darker, more intense, as her lips crashed into his. The kiss was anything but gentle as Matt's hands slid under the fabric of her shirt. His fingers tracing patterns along her hips, a gentle yet possessive hold. Dani tangles her fingers in his hair, feeling the soft strands between her fingertips as she tilts his head back slightly, deepening the kiss. 
"I swear if either of them walk in here..." Matt says into the kiss causing Dani to pull out of the kiss by turning her head away to laugh.
"As least my door as a lock."
"I wasn't the one who started this in my room." He tickles her side a bit and to stop him she cups his face in both hands.
"You never kiss me first except for our first one." She adds before capturing his lips in a kiss.
The kiss becomes a dance of shared affection. His lips molded against hers with a familiarity that feels surprisingly natural yet exhilaratingly new. His touch, tender yet assured, ignites a cascade of sensations. There was a delicate balance in his touch, a mix of reverence and longing that speaks volumes about the depth of his emotions.
"BUG! BUG! BUG! HELP!" They get interrupted by Nick yelling in the living room.
They both groan getting up to go help him, "He could've ran in here so it's not the worst way to be interrupted." Dani says before opening the door.
"True."
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liasadventuretime · 2 years ago
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˗ˏˋyou jealous ? :) ´ˎ˗ - neteyam x reader pt. 3
⁀➷  part three : CONGRATULATIONS, FUCKER.
notes : so um… hi ! since y’all really enjoyed pt. 2 i decided i might as well write a pt. 3… i have to say that it was kind of hard writing this part because i genuinely didn’t think people would’ve liked it that much and had no idea of what to say anymore ☠️ but anygays … i had a BIG ASS fight with my parents so they took my phone, and they’re probably going to take my mac away too so idk when i’ll upload pt. 4 ( if y’all want one ), so i tried to write a bit more this time, i hope it’s sufficient.
tags : @xoxobabe @marcswife21 @arminsgfloll @rubysworld96 @klarolinefanatic @giftfromthemoon @k4tsukiis @rainehatepage @neteyamsbbgfr @miapanticc @iixyia-deactivated20230123 @famousbagelhandspurse @astablacksword @ghoulfac3 @buttercake2234 @potseluymenya @mashiromochi @avatarslut0 @chanyeolsbeloved @regulus-black-223048 @isabelcor3 @grierpilots @neteyamsmate4life @beyoenisbalfart @severenswife @lady-in-gold @bealone-prm @hafutoru @jyoungmom @soxfix @thatgoodvibescloud @aalyara @abbersreads @neteyamsw @strawberryys-stuff @ilovestargirl @rubysworld96 @meivap @neteyamsullyswife @erenjaegerwifee @cherry-blossom34 @slutforavatar @hey-girl-hey @athenachu @laaalox @ghostjoohoney @tsamiaxo @arminsgfloll
warnings : a bit of angst, insecurity, overthinking neteyam lmao, detailed masturbation, this man is lusting waaaaaayyy too much over you lmao, a lil makeout session with someone 🤭, and i think that’s it lol.
everything was okay now. no really, everything’s okay.
after your talk with neteyam, he left you with more questions than answers once again.
your brain felt like a beehive, never stopping, so you tried to distract yourself with anything.
you trained, you read, you helped around, but not even spending time with ao’nung could help. you don’t think he noticed the way you pretended it was neteyam holding you, kissing you, spoiling you. but you gotta be careful.
you just had one single thought in your mind.
flashback
“you know we could argue right now, and no one would hear or see us ?”
“we could do anything right now, and nobody would see us. anything.”
your thoughts were interrupted by someone speaking.
you opened the tent only to see someone’s chest right in front of you, you tilted your head up and you saw him. neteyam.
your heart dropped to your stomach for a second, making you almost gasp. what was he doing here ? his hair was still in the same hairstyle you saw him in at the beach. he looked almost unreal.
face framed by a few braids, jaw locked making him look so nervous for some reason, his high cheekbones sharp as always, and even though you never told him, you wanted to feel his cheekbones so much, all the time. pointy nose with a little bump which you recognised immediately, it was jake’s. that bump was only on his nose, because all the other sons and daughters didn’t have it. he really is his father’s son. eyes still soulless, empty that almost looked dead. they were pointy, but not too much. he has that “sharp” look from neytiri, her stare could send you to heaven and above. his shoulders broad, not too muscly which is something you liked. his arms veiny and biceps always flexed, not even having to force it. his abs well sculpted, he was still wet, droplets of water running down his face and chest, he was probably swimming with lo’ak. or someone else.
you shook your head a bit, to get that thought off your head. it doesn’t matter, it really doesn’t. his v-line almost looks like it got highlighted and sharpened, which was the only thing you hated about the way your people dress.
his everything was for everyone to see. everyone.
you sometimes tend to forget he’s not offlimits, and to say you had nightmares, about someone else getting neteyam before you, was too little.
his voice snapping you out of your trance again, hoping he didn’t catch you quite literally analyzing his whole body, but the proud smile on his face immediately cleared all your doubts.
“your cigarettes.” he said getting in your face making fun of you. he handed you your pack of cigarettes. he didn’t give you the lighter but it didn’t matter, that’s the last thing you cared about right now.
that’s quite weird though. this isn’t the first time you forgot your cigarettes, he usually just keeps them since you smoke them together anyways. you better not think about it too much before you get delusional.
“oh, thank you.” you lightly smiled at him, looking at him in the eyes while taking the packet off your hands. but before you could get them, he pulled your hand to him and placed the pack on the top of your palm, his hand still holding yours. stop, stop, stop.
if you could only know what he was thinking about, he thought to himself.
if you could only know what he did later that night thinking about you.
flashback
“i fucking knew it.” he said, walking to his tent, his fists tight, his jaw locked.
he fucking knew you just couldn’t take that further step. he was only a game to you.
you enjoyed teasing him, playing with his mind acting like he was your dirty little toy, cared about only when you’re horny, or ao’nung couldn’t satisfy you enough.
how could he at the end of the day ? ao’nung wasn’t him and will never be.
he knows he’s better, but fuck do your choices fuck his mind up.
he though he could at least get one night with you, one single night. he could be near you, stay with you, inside you. he could see you. but you didn’t want to. hell, you didn’t even want to look at him.
the constant thoughts of you, torturing his mind. he hoped he could at least live one night of pure love, caring and affection, thinking you wanted too, so he could then go on with his life, mate with a person he didn’t love or care about only to satisfy his father, since the only thing he has always wanted was you.
he wanted you to look at him, but you were too busy staring and smiling at ao’nung.
he felt tears glossing his eyes, you could never be with him, because you simply didn’t want to.
as soon as he got into his tent, he immediately threw your shit away, that you forgot on the beach, with your other stuff. yes, he had a chest with a bunch of stuff you always forgot when you were around him. even looking at it, could make his heart wrench, feeling actual pain.
your blanket, you were nine years old and you had forgotten it when you slept that night with his parents, you had a nightmare. he didn’t sleep that night, so that if you had a nightmare again he could be the one to comfort you. not his parents, him.
your emerald braid accessory, you were eleven, he said he liked it, that it suited your face, so you took it off your braid and placed it in his hand, saying “take it, it’ll look better on you anyway”. it would’ve never looked better on anyone, that wasn’t you. so he just decided to keep it.
your spoon, the one that you used to eat your meals with, and that one time you happened to really like the meal his mom cooked for you. you took a spoonful of it, and positioned it in front of neteyam’s mouth. he was confused for a second, not getting if you actually wanted him to eat out of your spoon. you said “open your mouth, it’s really good, i promise”. not like you had to prove anything, he would’ve eaten a spoonful of poison if your hand was the one holding it. he hesitantly opened his mouth and you fed him. you smiled, and went back to eating your meal, with the same spoon you had just fed him with. it was something probably superficial for you, but it really did mean the world to him.
nostalgia was the sharpest blades of all.
if he only knew you thought the same exact thing.
his mask slipped for a second, letting a tear cut though his face, leaving behind a cold scar. he aggressively wiped it away. he hated you, so so so much. he couldn’t bear the sight of you.
he hated you.
he hated your beautiful hair, your sharp sparkly eyes, your soft cheekbones, your so damn kissable nose, your pouty lips that always fucking curl and smile at everyone’s jokes but his, the soft hill of your breast, the curve that separated your ribcage from the lowest part of your waist.
he couldn’t avoid getting hard every single fucking time. thinking about the way of your body moves when you play beach volley with your group, the way you felt on top of him, or well right on top of his dick, every single time you fought. he couldn’t avoid thinking about the way you were on top of him, fitting oh so well on his dick, while he was holding your wrists with one hand, but since you were way too angry, you didn’t even notice that his other free hand was placed on your waist with a brutal grip. to say he almost whimpered seeing stars, because of how well his big hand fitted on your strong curvy waist, was way too little.
there weren’t words to explain how much he wanted you. he could’ve collected every single thing he wrote about you, and still wouldn’t be enough to explain how hard his heart throbbed every time you were with him. well, maybe something else throbbed too.
neteyam couldn’t take it anymore. if he had to rub out every single thought he had about you, he would’ve became infertile a long time ago.
he placed his head on the pillow, trying to get to sleep in a fetal position. he turned and turned, trying to think of something else, but not the even aliyah, who he tried so hard to act like she was better than you, could lock his thought of you out of his mind.
he sighed in frustration, aggressively getting up when he noticed that.
his incredible massive boner, his dick’s timing was just great.
he got up, turned on the shower, making sure there was still some hot water, and took his clothes off.
“oh c’mon, now.” he silently said after taking off his underwear, noticing pre-cum on them. his dick spurted up, hitting him in the stomach. he rolled his eyes, and got in the shower.
the hot water hugged him, feeling like all of his problems were going down the drain.
he watched his dick gently throb, brought his hand to the base and slid it all the way up, circling his the tip, trying to let out of all the built up sexual tensione he had.
he tried to think about anything that wasn’t you. but how could he ?
how could he not think about the way your sex humped on his clothes, feeling your folds hug his shaft so perfectly. how could he not think of the way that you thought he didn’t notice you throb on him ? how could he not think of the way his hand from your waist slid down to your ass, before his dad separated the both of you ? how could he not think of the way that ao’nung’s hand was in your inner thigh, but you were looking at him ?
his pace got faster, making him heavy pant with his eyes closed, your figure tattooed on his eyelids. he came, seeing some of his seed on his hand and what was left of it going down the drain with the water and his problems.
he sighed, staying there, back held by the wall behind him, leaving him thinking. but he was way too tired of thinking. his temples were throbbing with pain, from how hard his headache was. he just finished washing himself, put some clothes on, and just went to sleep.
you woke up the next morning, head basically feeling like someone stomped on it.
you barely could even sleep last night, too many problems flowing in your thoughts.
you sighed, almost whimpering, brutishly throwing your head back on the pillow. why did everything have to be soooo complicated. you definitely had to talk to him, because all of this had to stop. you were tired, sexually frustrated and sleep deprived. this combo could easily make you kill anyone who even tries to disturb your peace.
you hated the way he was trying to hard to act like “he’s protecting his peace”, motherfucker your disturbing everyone else’s. you got up sloppily, waiting for lo’ak to come by your tent like he did every single morning.
but well, weird. time has passed and you didn’t even see lo’ak’s shadow, where could he be ?
you got out of your tent, walking to his parents’ one since the poor lil boo boo had nightmares basically every single night. you almost wanted to feel bad for him, but how the fuck could you ?
at the beginning you thought that after hearing all the crazy stories about the war his dad, the former Toruk Makto, fought, he just was scared and was having nightmares about that.
but after hearing that he had a nightmare about you fucking tsireya, you were done caring about this man. out of all things in the world, THAT ? since you said you could definitely fall in love with a girl, he went on flight or fight mode. saying this guy could literally sweat jealousy, was too little.
“father ? are you here ?” you said while keeping the tone of your voice low and calm, so you didn’t scare anyone off. but the scene in front of you could be the least thing you expected.
neytiri and jake seated in a circle with everyone, and when you say everyone, you meant EVERYONE. in front of jake there was neteyam, who looked like he almost killed someone by the way he had his head down, legs crossed and… was that a slap mark ??
on neteyam’s left, kiri and spider were seated. which is weird, why were they so quiet ? on neteyam’s right there were lo’ak and tuk. even tuk ? you felt a wave of goosebumps traveling their way up your back. this is way much more serious than you thought.
jake looked at you with the harshest expression you have ever seen on his face. “oh great, (y/n) sit down and join us.” you didn’t sit down, still trying to process what he was saying while walking in the tent, getting behind neteyam.
“FUCKING SIT. NOW.” he screamed at you, as you felt a wave of shock wash over you. you immediately sat down, accidentally bumping neteyam’s shoulder. that’s the first time jake has ever yelled at you. never, in his whole life has he ever screamed at you. yes, he sometimes could be mad at you, but has never screamed that way. neytiri looked at you with heartbroken eyes, mouthing ‘i’m so sorry.’. why would she apologise, it’s not like it’s her fault. right ?
jake huffed, keeping the palms of his hands on his crossed legs, almost looking like he was trying to find the words to explain what was on his mind. this man is going to get a heart attack if you and the others don’t stop stressing him. you felt ashamed, of the way you childishly fighted with neteyam over stupid stuff, not even realising your father couldn’t handle it anymore.
the shame, always comes at the worst time.
“this is the last fucking time i’m saying this. why THE FUCK-” he stopped for a second, trying to calm down for a second. tuk was with us, he probably didn’t want to swear or yell in front of her. you saw him take a deep breath and finish his sentence.
“why, THE FUCK, did you treat her like that ? what has she done to you ? it’s not like your skxawng ass has a mate to be loyal to.” he said, finishing his sentence.
your heart dropped, you were almost capable of hearing the echo of its fall. wait.
she ?
who are we talking about ?
interrupting you from your thoughts, jake stood up scaring everyone, and furiously walked to then kneel in front of neteyam. he harshly grabbed his face, making you gasp out loud, almost like he grabbed your face.
what happened ? you were so confused. she ? who is she ? how did he treat her for jake to be this mad ?
neteyam looked at him, his head tilt up with absent eyes, lips pressed together and jaw locked.
“you have absolutely no idea of what you’ve done, do you ?” jake almost whispered, which was probably even scarier than him screaming.
“this sweet sweet girl, who is literally the clan leader’s daughter, came up to you, asking you whatever the fuck she asked you, and what did you do ?” oh. so it’s tsireya’s sister we’re talking about, aliyah.
“’ oh leave me alone, i don’t want anything to do with you’” he said mocking neteyam’s words. he chuckled, and continued.
“your skxawng ass better be grateful if the leader doesn’t tell us to pack our staff and go the fuck away, after the way she ran away crying.” he stood up from his position, stopping the grasp on neteyam’s face, making him leave his head to the side. he lifted up his gaze, only to be met with yours.
you were genuinely so worried, in part because you couldn’t understand what in the actual fuck was happening. what did aliyah want ? why did neteyam make her cry ?
“is it my fault that i don’t want to mate with a person i don’t like ?” he silently said, making everyone turn their heads to him, no one expected him to talk. this is so bad.
jake stopped for a second with his back towards him. he slowly turned around with furrowed eyebrows and a slightly parted mouth. “what the fuck did you just say ?” he said, the vein on his temple was quite literally about to pop.
“I SAID, i don’t want to mate with her ! i don’t want her ! she was throwing herself all over me, like the fucking slag she is, and when i told her no, BECAUSE I HAVE EVERY FUCKING RIGHT TO SAY NO, she started crying.” he stopped for a second, catching his breath while looking at his dad. he couldn’t recognise him, why was he suddenly so pressed and stressed about neteyam finding a mate ? did it have to do with you ?
jake crossed his arms, and with an ironic smirk on his face he said “then who the fuck do you like, huh ? is every other girl so repellent to you ? have you suddenly became picky or what ?”
neteyam was about to let a tear cut through his face but he didn’t even though his eyes still remained glossed with tears. “i like someone else, but they don’t want to have anything to do with me. that’s it. it’s not the end of the world.” neteyam finished, with a slightly cracked but most importantly low voice.
jake stared at him for a couple of seconds. his face was now suddenly calm, while neytiri’s was absolutely devastated.
there was no denying it, neteyam’s a mommas boy. thank god, neytiri never tried to emotionally incest him, indeed she was happy when he talked to her about this someone he liked. that was the first time neytiri saw her sweet son be so wrapped around someone’s finger. she said that he should at least try, not jump to conclusions. but if he did jump to conclusions earlier, he wouldn’t have to feel his heart wrench and blood boil every single time he thought about what happened that night with you at the beach. he should’ve jumped to conclusion, and probably taken a fucking hint. you didn’t want him. that’s it, it’s as simple as it gets. move on, neteyam.
move on.
jake looked at you for a second, like the answer to all his problems was somewhere inside of you. in that exact moment he thought.
“is it better to speak or to die ?”
should he speak ? should he let you know that all of this, was because neteyam couldn’t move past you ? he couldn’t even count on his hands how many other omatikaya women have came up and asked to be neteyam’s mate. and he refused to even look at them. one after the other.
or should he die ? let his son stare at you with dreamy eyes, trying everyday to kill whatever he felt for you ? see him mate with another person he probably didn’t love, or even want to be near to ? should he kill his son ? a body is nothing without its soul. you were half of him, even though you were probably complete on your own. that’s the thing.
you could live without neteyam, neteyam couldn’t live without you.
neteyam stood up, catching everyone’s attention, leaving the tent and distracting jake from his thoughts.
“reunion finished, get out” he said opening the tent’s entrance for everyone.
neteyam had been waiting for you. on the beach, with a new lighter, because he wanted to keep yours. only waiting for you to come here, smile at him, sit next to him and smoke together.
but after an hour, he was worried. had something happened to you ? where did you go after the family reunion ?
he just decided to get up, and look for you. to finally try and not jump to conclusions again.
to finally say those damn three words.
“i see you.”
yes, that was the day, or maybe he could at least try and hint his intentions. letting you know he wanted more than a hookup, and that he finally was fucking ready to treat you like he should have been all this time.
ok no, maybe it’s a little too early for that.
he had no idea that that same day, ao’nung came by your tent.
“hey, how are you ?” ao’nung asked, face poking from the side of your tents entrance. you were surprised he came by your tent. he wasn’t used to do this, but it’s not like you don’t appreciate it.
“hey” you said back. he got in the tent, looking around for a bit. this was probably the first time he came here after you decided to basically move here.
“so, what have you been up you?” you tried to keep a conversation going, you couldn’t bare the silence it was way too awkward.
“i’ve been missing you.” he said, in a serious tone. silence dropped for a second, but it was immediately interrupted by your laughs. thank god.
“and what have you been up to ?” he smiled looking at you while leaning his back on the wall. maybe you could fall in love with him. or maybe you’re just delusional.
“nothing special, if i have be to be honest, but… “ you left your sentence incomplete, walking to him with his gaze glued on you. same smirk on his face.
“… i’ve been missing you too.” you finished your sentence, placing a kiss on his lips.
you were such a little dirty liar. you didn’t miss him one bit.
you place another kiss on his lips, and another one. and another one.
until he placed a hand behind your neck, smashing your lips together, deepening your kiss. his tongue lightly parted your lips, as if he was asking for your consent. you hugged his tongue with yours, tasting him. but ao’nung’s lips couldn’t even come near netayam’s lips. soft, on your skin, jaw and neck. his hand tracing circles on your waist as usual, your arms thrown to circle his neck.
you silently moaned against his lips, catching his attention, making him heavy breathe. your lips still attached to his, you lightly jumped, his big hands covering your ass, making you hug his waist with your legs.
you were so deep already, into all of this story. are situationships supposed to act like this ? was it normal ? are you falling in love ? or are you falling in love with the person you’re pretending is holding you right now ?
are you in love with ao’nung or the guy that could make you fall to your knees with only a kiss ? or make you whimper with a single touch ? or make you doubt everything you know with a simple phrase ? that someone had such a special effect on you, you don’t think there’s any language in this world that is capable of explaining what he did to you. how he makes you feel.
you were so so so tired. of fighting. of pretending. of replacing.
shouldn’t things be easier ?
your thoughts interrupted by ao’nung’s lips kiss and biting on your neck, but neteyam did it so much better. you lifted your face, giving him more space to work on. ao’nung suddenly stopped, face still in the crook of your neck . and you suddenly had this bad bad feeling in your gut.
something bad about to happen to you. you don’t what it is, but you feel it coming.
you waited for ao’nung to say something, hands still on your back to hold you, like you weighted as much as a feather. he could give you anything you wanted, but how could ask him to give you another person ? that unfortunately wasn’t him.
“i know who you pretend i am.” your heart dropped the moment ao’nung spoke those words, with his voice low and cracked. he knew and still came by your tent. the guilt was chocking you.
he knows, and i know he knows. what could you even say ? that it wasn’t true ? that he was worried for nothing ? you couldn’t, because not only you would be lying to him, but you would also be lying to yourself.
as if your night couldn’t get better, someone entered the tent.
but as soon as you felt your heart stinging, you knew damn well you were in so much trouble.
so so so so much trouble. you were absolutely fucked.
you didn’t even have to look at him, to realise that the person who just entered your tent was neteyam. you immediately fell back to your feet, distancing yourself from ao’nung.
who did you even have to be loyal to ?
but maybe, it just was the fact that you couldn’t betray your heart.
you suddenly felt naked, in front of him. his gaze confused, eyes glossed once again with tears.
you just wanted to disappear, you just wanted to die.
he scoffed, crossing his arms and looking at you with a smirk on his face. this was so bad.
ao’nung kept trying to keep track on what was happening, why were you so suddenly acting like this. but he might have realised something, that the two of you have been trying to hide so hard. his eyes flashed, mouth slightly opened. heart completely shattered. he immediately ran out of the tent, purposely bumping his shoulder against neteyams. not even daring to look back. you felt a tear leave your eye. what have you done ?
the silence was suddenly interrupted by neteyams voice, making you tilt your head up.
“congratulations, fucker.”
he stopped for a second. trying to get the words.
“if you only knew how many words i have wasted on you, and how many other words i was willing to waste. even tonight, but you didn’t even come by.”
that’s all he said, before leaving once again, following ao’nung’s traces.
leaving you alone.
alone, again.
final notes : damn um, so how did y’all like it ? i hope u enjoyed it ! if y’all want a part four remember to like the post and if you want to be tagged and you’re not already on the tag list, message me privately or comment it ! for some reason i can’t tag everyone, so i’ll just directly send it ! sorry for the wait, AND PLS LET ME KNOW WHERE YALL ARE FROM BECAUSE IM EUROPEAN AND I POST AT COMPLETELY RANDOM TIMES 😭
sneak peak : so the time has come ! someone noticed a song reference i put in my story ! if y’all didn’t already notice it, in all my posts i put some song references which, if you can tell me from which song or band it is, you get a sneak peak of the next part before everyone else ! the first winner was… @grierpilots !, the reference was from a neighbourhood song, one of my favs which is crybaby ! the reference was : “i always get this anxious feeling, but it goes away when i’m with you breathing.” which neteyam said to you in pt. 2 of the fic ! the quote isn’t exact but it’s always recognisable :)
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