#no freaking WONDER i have to be medicated again
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fuadaka · 7 days ago
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i could not give any less of a hoot about lady kaka’s new song bc of her silence on 🍉 and watching everyone just welcome her with open arms is so infuriating i’m going insane all over again
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mars-ipan · 1 year ago
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i feel so smart rn
#marzi speaks#tw drug mention#<- in these tags that is#so i went christmas shopping again today#last time i went i immediately got stressed out. i did Not want a repeat#thankfully! my mother gave me a genius idea:#just do it a little high#so a couple hours before i had to go i took an edible#that way i’d be solidly in it when i was there#it worked. wonders#i normally would have been freaking out anxious abt all i had to do#and all the people and such#i was FINE !!! i was hanging out i was Chilling#i was able to buy jewelry from dillards for my mother. do you know how much i HATE dillards??? it’s a Lot#so i got all my shopping done. and now i’m just hanging out enjoying the rest of this high#fucking. genius#i know using drugs to self medicate is like a VERY common thing#but it’s interesting to discover it for the first time#it helps that i only do edibles so i’m less tempted to constantly get high bc. it is a Commitment#if i do edibles i have to be ok with being high for the rest of the day#so i don’t take them too often. just every now and again#most times i’ll just drink a cup of chamomile. that works for me#but for situations like this?? where i knew i was gonna be in a high stress environment for multiple hours and i needed to keep my cool?#yeah sure i’ll wake n bake. why the hell not i’m not driving#my poor brother tho. he was anxious enough for the both of us#not bc he thought i would get in trouble or anything but just bc christmas shopping is evil#but he got almost all of what he needed and i’m gonna wrap most of the stuff he bought anyways so. he’ll be fine
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coridallasmultipass · 2 months ago
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#hhhhh im still really freaked out about needing a root canal thing done again on the same tooth#my clinic called me to make sure the doctor explained things to me#and i totally misunderstood everything she was asking me and i just mansplained everything back to her#she was looking for like a yes or no answer and i just foot in the mouth thought she wasnt clear on what the endodontist sent her#listen im tired and sore and scared and hadnt had pain medicine yet at that point in the morning#understated my pain too bc i have fibromyalgia and its like. i gotta subtract like 5 points to cover for the fact that...#...im in constant pain all the time including all of my teeth#she was like 'we can probably process the request for the second root canal by next week'#excuse me? 🙃 so im gonna be having fucked up half-teeth one on each side of my mouth?? till the end of january??#how tf am i supposed to eat anything?!?! my diet is already fucked up from having jaw pain and tooth pain from orthodontics#im having regular days of 3-digit calories and none of them are healthy calories except the supplements im taking like#how tf am i supposed to eat anything man im tired and its so hard for me to make any food at all bc of my back pain#im so fucking tired of everything i dont want oral surgery man just let me live with the infection at this point#that tooth doesnt have a root anymore so i dont even notice it and ive been used to the sensitivity since 2022 man#this is too much and im scared to call the tmj doctor about my orthodontics bc i dont wanna ...#...sit in the fucking car 2 hours each way to go for another visit bc of my back pain. its unbearable just sitting in the car 5 mins#wonder if getting orthodontics made the infection show bc of the tooth movements. just ugh. im sick of everhthing happening#vent#personal#medical#dental#delete later / /#ShitPost.exe
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llycaons · 10 months ago
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something else I really love about feast and famine is how wwx isn't all 'wow lan zhan you're the best I can't believe you've been putting up with me I'm SO grateful you're literally perfect even though I'm so needy thank you so so so much' bc that sentiment arises in a lot of fics that handle his trauma or mental health and it's SO tiresome not to mention ooc. like it's not there for no reason bc wwx did express gratitude in canon and lwj IS a really good and supportive partner, but it's really refreshing to see wwx in a stable and reliable enough relationship where, except that one time he was triggered and panicking, he literally never once doubted that lwj would support and stand with him, nor did he ever feel the need to even thank lwj for being a good partner, even through the extremely heavy and difficult work of supporting him through what happened
and they DO communicate a lot, it's more that the gratitude is left unsaid because it's mutually understood to be unnecessary. and as much I'm in favor of them communicating their gratitude to each other, I feel like this dynamic for them is so much healthier and more mature and illustrates how strong their relationship is and how much they trust each other. also the idea of lwj as this...saintlike martyr who nobly supports and reassures a self-hating wwx is really tiring. he has his own struggles to be sure, but he has them away from wwx and the writing doesn't frame him as some tragic, self-sacrificing hero for it. like I love lwj but that's what it should be about, right? this was always going to be wwx's story first and foremost and I really appreciate works that let it be that
#like lwj freaking out to his brother or telling jyl about his trauma around his mom and going to support groups#that was so necessary and important for him. and wwx probably knew he was doing it. but he and the narrative didn't make it wwx's problem#OR make a big deal of not making it wwx's problem which is the more annoying and common trend#one of my early criticisms abt this fic was actually that they were TOO well-adjusted and healthy#wwx's past trauma seems to be limited to whatever made him scared of dogs and getting disowned as a teenager#which is awful to be sure but not rly comparable to canon#and in fact I was surprised his canon suicidal tendancies never showed up#but I think he was in a safe and supportive enough environment that that also made sense#like. everything possible that could be done was done. lwj came back from his trip. jyl was with him from that first morning#jc came in to help even though he fucked it up initially I think wwx clearly was really happy to have him there#he didn't have to work or worry about food or money or being alone#not that the current system is perfect obviously. like he did get a bunch of therapy and specialized therapy but#he got medical care immediately which while necessary was ALSO traumatizing and went to support groups which ALSO were horrible/demeaning#but overall compared to canon post-SS#he was able to break down and process everything in a healthy way#instead of suppressing his trauma because he has an obligation to be strong for others or to keep people alive#in canon he doesn't really have that freedom until postres. and then post-travels even#and by then things have faded with time. but I wonder if that makes it easier or harder to process them#esp since most of the people who he was close to back then are all gone#anyway. fic I think about literally constantly but idk if I can reread it all again it's very painful and heavy. like most of it but#the hospital scene is just so horrifying#not my favorite but up there maybe. I certainly regard it higher than a place to hide for exactly the reasons listed in the post#the first sex scene is so cringe tho 😔 I must sound like a maniac. like that post about showing ppl hxh for the first time#but it's so well-written besides that part I PROMISE#suicide tw#just a mention but eh#ficblogging
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januaryembrs · 6 months ago
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MY BABY, HERE ON EARTH | Spencer Reid x Prentiss!Reader [BONUS]
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Description: the NINE months of pregnancy
Word count: 10.9k
warnings: pregnancy duh, babies, giving birth, c-section, ummm body fluids? lots of emotions, nausea & sickness, talks of weight gain and stretch marks.
authors note: y'all... there you have it. I will be back to finish their story but until then this is my goodbye piece until I have finished my hiatus to write my own book and start uni (again). I can't wait to take these two (three) on the final lap they deserve but for now.. I hope you enjoy pookies being pookies.
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MONTH ONE. The one where she finds out.
She hadn’t meant to find out when she did. It had been just a routine implant swap that she’d had twice already in the last six years. 
“Any blood clotting, any pain at all?” The nurse asked, jotting down a few notes on her form as she sat back on the bed and waiting for the numbing cream to take hold. 
She shook her head. “It’s weird as hell to feel and when I think about it too long it freaks me out, but no, no pain,” She said and the nurse chuckled, nudging her glasses up her nose.
“And finally, is there any chance that you’re pregnant?” She asked, no doubt having rehearsed the same script about thirty times that day alone.
Bugsy gave her a flat smile, “Small chance, but I guess that’s what this is for, huh?” 
The nurse looked at her then, as if mulling over the words before she said something, “Small chance?”
“I mean, nothing is a hundred percent effective,” Bugsy tried to weasel her way out of the awkward conversation, because she had absolutely no intention of letting the nurse know her and Spencer had been at it like bunnies since the Hotch had forced them to take medical leave. Who knew having so much time on her hands with her very handsome boyfriend would have that effect? 
The nurse pursed her lips, and already the woman felt like she’d said too much. 
“Alright, we’re going to do a routine test, just need a quick urine sample,” Bugsy felt her cheeks heat, though she was in no position to argue. Her discomfort must have been more obvious than she thought, however, as the nurse went on to explain, “If I give you this implant and there’s a fertilised egg, it can lead to ectopic pregnancy, in which case you’ll need surgery. Trust me, honey, peeing in a cup is your easy option,” 
She gave the practitioner a small nod, wondering if she needed to message Spencer to say she’d be running a little late. She knew he was likely doing the sudoku in the waiting room magazine, since he’d refused to let her come alone. And even though she’d told him she would be fine on her own, he’d seen through it, had even offered to get her ice cream on the way home for putting on a brave face. 
And yet her face was nothing short of horror struck not even half an hour later when the nurse showed her the stick with empathetic eyes. 
“Congratulations,” The woman said cautiously, a fake smile plastered on her face as the girl stared at her, utterly gobsmacked. 
“But, I thought…” Bugsy stammered, running a finger over where the nurse had removed her implant, “But I had everything ready, I never let it get late, I did what I was supposed to,” 
“You said it yourself, honey, nothing is a hundred percent effective besides abstinence-” 
“That’s just what parents say to make sure their kids aren’t banging every Tom, Dick and Harry out there!” Bugsy was near screeching, the worry in her tone clear as a bell and her chest hot with panic. 
Pregnant. She was pregnant, there was no way she could be…
Except there was exactly a way she could be, seeing as she struggled even on a dry spell to keep her hands off Spencer longer than a few days at a time. And he was just as bad.
The nurse huffed, rifling through her drawers for a handful of pamphlets. She passed them to Bugsy whose mouth was still bobbing with more expletives she held herself back from saying, and it wasn’t until she saw the happy couple on the front of the first one, holding a very swollen and round bump that she thought she might be sick. 
Comical timing, she hissed at herself. 
“There are always options, sweetheart. Abortion is legal in Virginia, if that is what you decide, however there is always information and support that we recommend looking into before you make a solid decision,” Her response was professional even though her expression was compassionate, and Bugsy knew she must have looked scared because that was exactly how she felt and she had little to no room to hide it. 
Abortion? Is that what she wanted? Except it wasn’t just about what she wanted, it was what Spencer wanted too. Even if he would argue against that being the case in a heartbeat, even if he would tell her she had every right to be the only one to make a decision, no matter what he thought. But maybe it wasn’t so much about needing his opinion for that reason, and more it was because she had absolutely no clue what to do and Spencer was always good at making sense of the things she didn’t know how to deal with. 
She nodded silently, her mouth dry as sandpaper as she took the leaflets and stuffed them in the bottom of her purse where she hoped Spencer wouldn’t go looking. 
She barely remembered standing on liquid legs, barely remembered the way her chest felt tight and her head spun as she thought of the fact her body had a baby growing inside it. 
No, it wasn’t a baby. Not yet. It was likely the size of a grain of sand, miniscule. That wasn’t a baby, that was nothing. 
But it would be. Eventually. It would be hers and Spencer’s baby.
And she wanted to tell him, wanted to tell him the second she saw him there in the waiting room, his head shooting up the second the door opened and she left looking a little ill and shaken. 
“All done? Everything go as normal?”  He preened, standing immediately as she neared him, his hand immediately weaving around her shoulder to pull her close by. Gently, ofcourse, because she had a big, fat bandage where her implant should have been. 
“Y-yeah,” She stammered, hoping he didn’t hear the shake in her throat. Yet she knew immediately that he did. Because he leaned in to give her a delicate kiss to her forehead not even a moment later, “C-can we go straight home, I’m not feeling ice cream anymore,” 
He looked worried, as anyone who knew her would because Bugsy turning down free pudding was a blaring red siren in his eyes.
“Yeah, sure,” He said, stroking a gentle hand over the side of her head and leading her where he’d parked the car. 
And it was that worry, the same cloud that hung over him for months with Scratch and his mom and the Dirty Dozen and everything else that was put onto his shoulder that made her shut her mouth right then and there. He didn’t need one other thing to contend with, not when he was already carrying the weight of the world. 
And so she wouldn’t tell him. Not yet at least.
MONTH TWO. The one with the scan.
“Spence, would you stop worrying, I’m sure everything will be fine,” She urged in the gentlest tone she could muster. Yet she was a hypocrite, because she felt her hands shaking as she sat in the chair, trying to adjust her sleeves for something to do and Spencer stopped his leg from bouncing. 
Looking over at her, he sighed, holding out a large palm and weaving her fingers in between his and she flicked a look over at him, her own eyes nervous. 
“I’m sorry,” He gave her a guilty smile, “If it helps, it’s half excitement too,”
And she smiled then, shaking her head as he squeezed her hand gently. 
“Me too,” She confessed, looking down at her stomach that didn’t seem all too different than usual. She’d felt a few symptoms up until this point, a bit of nausea but that was nothing she couldn’t handle, headaches here and there. But it wasn’t anything exactly life changing that she’d expected when she’d always thought of pregnancy. 
If anything, none of it felt real quite just yet. Having only been a few weeks since she’d told Spencer, they’d spent the majority of the time searching for houses and appointments and gynaecologists and neonatal care, and whenever they were free, they were trying to get used to the idea of the two of them as parents.
“Did you know they’re around half an inch long by now,” Spencer said, his hazel eyes falling to where her shirt hid her stomach that had yet to change no matter how many times he stared at it, “About a third of that is made up of their head,”
“Wouldn’t surprise me,” She shrugged, stroking her thumb along the edge of his pinky finger, “It’s your kid, they’re going to have biggest brain out there,” 
He snickered, lifting her hand to press a kiss to the back of it softly, “If they have even half your brains, we’re going to be raising the next Galileo,” 
“Mr and Mrs Reid,” Their heads shot up at the midwife, Bugsy fumbling for words to correct him as the two of them stood up to greet him with bashful smiles. She didn’t need to look at Spencer’s face to know he’d gone bright red. 
“It’s uh, Prentiss-Reid,” Spencer spluttered as they entered and the nurse looked again at his chart with wide eyes, his cheeks a little pink himself and he ushered the two of them into his office with a smile. 
“So it is, I do apologise,” He said earnestly, holding a hand out to gesture Bugsy to sit on the reclining bed, “I hate to stereotype, but usually when dad books the appointments, its because their wives are already doing a hundred other things,” 
“It’s okay, it happens,” She said with an awkward chuckle, avoiding Spencer’s eyes because they still hadn’t had that talk. Even though she knew her mother would frown at her grandchild being born a bastard, she didn’t care much for Elizabeth’s opinion. It wasn’t like marriages had ever led to good things for her mother anyway. 
She hopped up onto the examination cot, her heart quivering just the slightest in worry because the smell of bleach and rubber made the whole thing real. Until then, having a grain of rice growing inside her seemed like a fever dream since she’d only had a handful of side effects, throwing up could have easily been passed off as bad chicken, the head aches could have just been her eyes straining from using her computer too much. 
“Okay, everything feels okay, Mom? Nothing concerning at all?” And then the midwife said things like that, mom, and the part of her that almost forgot she was pregnant came to a screeching halt. 
She’d be a mom. Someone would call her mom. The thought of it made her suck in a breath.
“Uh, no.” She cleared her throat and felt Spencer grab her hand, “Morning sickness is kicking my ass, but nothing worrying,”
The nurse chuckled, and she felt Spencer rubbing his thumb over the back of her palm, his eyes burning into the side of her head. 
“Well, if it’s alright, I need you to lift your shirt up a little so we can have a see what’s going on,” He said with a kind smile, and she realised then he’d slipped latex gloves over his hands, and brandished a bottle of gel. 
She nodded absently, doing as he said and lifting her shirt to sit under her breasts, drawing the hem of her skirt down so he had a space to apply. And the second he did she sucked in breath through her nose, the cold of the air conditioning chilling her to her marrow, and she tried telling herself that’s why her hands were shaking. 
She felt Spencer’s fingers curve through her hair, and she reminded herself to breathe, looking over at him with nervous eyes she hoped he didn’t see straight through. But judging by the way he scooted the chair forward and gave her an encouraging smile, she guessed he’d seen the flicker of doubt in an instant. 
“It’s okay, it’s going to be fine,” He murmured, his own fear buried deep somewhere she couldn’t see anymore the second she had been the one to look to him for help. She knew she wanted this, knew she’d always dreamed of Spencer and her having their happily ever after. She knew whenever she’d let herself think of a little boy with chocolate curls and hazel eyes that she wanted all of that and more. 
But it was all so… real. Like seeing a movie come to life, and she was starring centre stage. Her body wasn’t a disposable shell that held thirty plus years of stupid mistakes and regrets and tattoos she’d decided she hated now. Her body had a whole other human inside it. 
The midwife clicked the machine on, the transducer wand ready in his hand as he gently put it on her lower stomach, barely a few centimetres from her panties, and she wondered why they showed the wand roaming over the woman’s belly button on tv shows since that was entirely wrong and not nearly as embarrassing. She let out a shaky breath, and Spencer stroked her head again, forcing her to give him an unsure look, like she was trying to calm herself for his sake but couldn’t.
His eyes were anxious though he squeezed her again with a smile and she saw it immediately, like he too was trying to be brave for her. 
She had never loved him so much. 
“Apologies for the shock, I know the gel can be a little cold,” The nurse said with a grin, and it was only then she realised the screen had lit up with a black and white image, one she’d seen a thousand times when she’d studied neonatal procedures for her degree. 
She knew that was her womb lining, and that was the amniotic fluid and that right there-
Bugsy froze, and judging by the way Spencer’s hand tightened around her own, he had too. She felt her mouth drop with a laugh of shock, and she sat up slightly to take a closer look at the monitor. 
“And there is baby,” The midwife said, his expression warming as he watched Spencer’s stand up to lean over the bed, not once letting go of the woman’s hand, the two of them utterly enraptured in the screen, “Probably about the size of a raspberry,”
And Bugsy laughed, her eyes lined with tears as she looked up at Spencer’s equally wetted hues. He was grinning from ear to ear when he looked down at her, and it wasn’t long before he brought his lips to her forehead, his nose and throat burning with a held cry. 
“Do you hear that? A whole raspberry already?” She said, her voice wobbling and he giggled, sitting back in his seat and rubbing his cheeks with his sleeve. “I am good at this cooking thing, might as well call me an easy bake oven,”
Spencer shook his head with another chuckle, his eyes trailing back to the little blob on the screen that looked more like a toy alien than anything else, and held her hand between both of his like he was in prayer. 
Because Spencer never believed in anything sacred and divine until he met Bugsy.
MONTH THREE. The one where they tell everyone.
“What are you doing?” Bugsy jumped out of her skin as JJ all but materialised behind her. She looked over her shoulder guiltily, her hand still half way through pouring out her mug of coffee Derek had handed her before he left to get lunch. 
She turned to see the blonde with her own steaming mug of decaf in her hands. She’d been taking the lack of caffeine much better this time around since having a second baby to breastfeed, considering she was nothing short of evil when she’d had Henry, which had been Spencer’s words not Bugsy’s. And it wasn’t as if the woman could blame her. She was grouchy when she didn’t get her regular dose even before being pregnancy, Derek had once gotten a kick to the shin when he’d disturbed her on a day she’d been too busy to grab one on her way to the office. 
She was a fiend for the bitter god. And everyone knew it. Which was exactly why JJ’s eyebrows were all but raised into her hairline seeing the girl who would usually be in the stages of withdrawal by now tipping the drink away. 
“Uh, the milk tasted funky,” She excused, though the way JJ narrowed her eyes at the poor excuse told her it hadn’t passed by a mile. 
“Right, the milk that Hotch picked up this morning?” JJ pursed her lips, sliding her own mug onto the side and jutting her hip. 
And as if he were summoned, Hotch sidled up to the kitchenette, Rossi and Tara hot on his heels as they flicked through some paperwork, and his head shot up the minute he heard his name. 
His eyes trailed to where the girl flipped her mug upside on the drying rack, and his brow furrowed. 
“Is everything alright?” He asked, and she huffed in response, wiping her hands on her jeans. 
“Yes, I’m fine,” She grumbled, shaking her head, “I don’t know what you’re all so wound up about, it’s not like I’m dying, I just don’t feel like coffee today-”
“Oh my god,” Penelope gasped where she crept behind Hotch with her very favourite octopus mug in tow, one that was nearly thrown to the floor when she heard the words pour from the girl’s mouth, “Are you sick? Like in the body or in the head? Rossi, check her pulse, I’m going to get a thermometer-”
“Pen, I’m fine,” She said unconvincingly and she tried to skirt past the group that seemed to have her surrounded. Seeing Spencer pulling up the rear in search of lunch she felt herself sigh in relief, because he would think of a much better excuse than she ever could. 
She had barely been able to keep her mouth shut for the months they had been secretly dating, and had relished in the peace it brought her when everyone knew. But the midwife had said it was common to keep things under wraps at least until the first trimester was over. Apparently the million of questions that were sure to be heading their way would cause her unnecessary stress, though she’d argue having to sneak to the sink every morning and dispose of a delicious looking coffee was torture enough. 
“What’s up?” Spencer asked as she ducked towards him, his hand consciously wrapping around her waist, and she huffed again, looking to him with a silent plea.
“They’re profiling me,” Bugsy said, and he felt his gut knot because he should have known it wouldn’t be long before they caught on. It was their job to pick apart out of the ordinary behaviour, and Bugsy going teetotal on caffeine was definitely something of a head turner.
“I told you that diet would cause a stir,” He joked, hoping they bought his pathetic attempt of an excuse, as he gave her side a gentle squeeze, and hoped that he could lead her back to her desk like she was a lost little lamb being prowled upon by nosy wolves that rarely took no for an answer. 
And it almost worked, almost, until JJ snapped her fingers and pointed at his wandering hand. 
“See that, that is the fourth time you’ve been all touchy and weird this week,” The blonde surprised, her brows furrowing, “Bugsy hates PDA, usually by now she would have whacked you over the head and called you a perv,”
Bugsy smashed her lips together because she couldn’t exactly disagree with her. That’s exactly what she usually did. Usually would tell Spencer to stop being so horny in a place of work even if she felt her cheeks heat at the delicate grabs of her stomach fat. 
But whether it was the little bean now around the size of a small lemon that had made her mellow and affectionate, or whether the lack of caffeine really was making her feel vulnerable, she wasn’t sure. And the whole thing was only made worse by Hotch’s eyes burning into the side of her, and she felt the trail of his gaze head straight for her stomach. 
“Come to think of it, I only saw you with a lime and soda at Savannah’s birthday last week,” Rossi pointed out, wagging his finger in her direction, his brown hues widening in thought, “When Penelope asked if you wanted tequila you said-”
“I’m all tequila-ed out,” Penelope chimed in with the same frown, “But that can’t be, when have you ever been tequila-ed out, that’s like impossible, even that night we had to help Spencer get you in the shower because you’d thrown up everywhere you were demanding more,”
She felt her cheeks heat thinking about her twenty ninth birthday, or atleast the parts of it she could remember of it before the rest of the gaps were filled with black spaces of time that she guessed had been robbed from her by the shots she piled on. 
“Maybe I just didn’t feel like tequila, can a girl not live in the moment?” She tried to rebuttal, only Penelope gave her a blank look that told her to try again because the Bugsy she knew would slap her for saying something so dumb. She opened her mouth to correct her again, but Hotch beat her to it. 
“You know Hayley got really affectionate a couple months into being pregnant,” The man said, his eyes swirling with something proud and warm when he saw Bugsy’s head flick to him like she’d been caught red handed, which they had. “Though, if you ask me I think she was just a little sorry for herself that I took the coffee away,”
There was a beat of silence, and the room held its breath. Even Tara, who had only known them the best part of a few months raised her hand to her mouth in shock, and Bugsy shot a look at Spencer in utter defeat. 
“We tried,” She said with her shoulders shrugging, and it was then that the office was filled with a piercing scream that turned a fair few heads and the infamous octopus mug was thrown clear across the kitchen floor, one of his tentacles snapping clean off. 
“OH MY GOD, IT’S TRUE? YOU’RE PREGNANT?” Penelope wailed like a banshee, and Bugsy couldn’t help but break into a smile, nodding at the woman who screeched again and yanked her in for a tight hug, “Oh my god, there's going to be three of you, three geniuses, three little einsteins that I want to smush together and kiss all over-” 
“Garcia, I think she needs air if she’s going to make another little genius,” Rossi said, and the tech analyst pulled away aghast, cupping Bugsy’s face that was still grinning ear to ear with a chuckle.
“Oh my god, I didn’t hurt you did I? Or the baby- Oh my god there’s a baby in there!” 
Hotch wrapped a rare yet tender arm around Spencer’s shoulder, giving him a little pat and a “Congratulations” while Rossi smiled knowingly between the couple and JJ had her turn smothering Bugsy in a tearful hug. 
And by the time Derek had walked into the office with his everything bagel hanging between his teeth and a tea in his hands, his onyx hues fell to Penelope, JJ and Bugsy exchanging weepy words while Tara handed them tissues with her own sparkling eyes.
“What fresh hell did I miss?”
MONTH FOUR. The one where she starts looking different.
She huffed, her fingers gripping the edge of her jeans and yanking them up her thighs as far as they would go. She felt like everything had shrunk in the wash, or like she was trying on a doll’s wardrobe. Surely she hadn’t gained that much weight in just a few months, but then again she’d been all but living off chocolate pudding cups since the Bean decided it wanted sugar, sugar and more sugar. 
She grunted in annoyance, her arms and back aching where she was leaning over to pull at the infernal things. She barely had a second to pout childishly, before kind hands were wrapping around her stomach and a mouth kissed at her neck tenderly. 
“What’s wrong? Talk to me,” His voice was honey sweet, thick and goopy with love overflowing as he pulled her to his chest, his hand caressed the bump that seemed to be getting in the way of her and her favourite jeans. Spencer knew she tried to ignore the symptoms that almost every woman felt during pregnancy, he knew she compared herself to how JJ had handled both pregnancies gracefully and looked better than ever even as a mother of two. He knew she hated complaining because she didn’t want him to think she was miserable carrying their kid, but god was she getting sick of her clothes pinching her in.
“I’m getting fatter,” Bugsy grumbled, her eyes darting to the vivid lines that had deepened into the crease of her hips within a few weeks and she winced, “I’m not even halfway, how does this kid want to eat pudding all the time?” 
Spencer frowned, shaking his head slightly because he refrained from telling her what a silly statement it was, knowing it would only make her feel worse, and instead pressed delicate kisses to her jaw, squeezing her closer. He’d noticed the stretch marks, just as he’d noticed her face and hips gathering weight a bit more than usual, and was just grateful there was even more Bugsy to love. 
“You’re eating for two, you’re literally growing a whole life inside of you. I think that is more than enough grounds to eat whatever you want,” He murmured, biting the inside of his cheek when she sighed as though she didn’t believe him, “Honey, clothes are replaceable. What your body’s trying to do is create a little bubble around you and this little pudding fiend so you can feed them when they’re out here,” 
Bugsy knew he was right. She’d spent well over a hundred hours researching hormone levels and how pregnant bodies are changing all hours of the day to accommodate the foetus, she knew it was normal for things to look different. Had it been on anyone else she wouldn’t have batted an eye. But it didn’t make the sting of seeing her body morph into one she didn’t recognise any less harsh.
“I know,” She hummed somewhat defeated, turning in his arms to press her face in his neck, “I just didn’t expect it to happen so fast is all,”
Spencer smiled warmly, because every day he thought she had gotten impossibly prettier. He hadn’t believed in ‘pregnancy glow’, in fact he’d chalked it down to some sort of innate scientific survival tactic that associated a vulnerable woman with looking angelic, at least not until he’d woken up to see her stomach protruding from her pyjama top in a clear curve shape and he thought her face looked like she should be in some Monet painting, dozing in a field like a wide eyed doe. 
“I know, it’s a lot for anyone to go through. But you know I’m so grateful for you,” Spencer said, and he felt her smile without even seeing it. Her fingers wove into his hair at the nape of his neck, kissing a trail up his chest because he suspected she looked somewhat embarrassed. “Besides, I’m not complaining. It means I get to do this,” 
She felt two large hands grab at the fat of her bum cheeks and she squeaked in surprise, even though she heard him laugh in her ear at her reaction. That had been another thing she’d noticed, and how could she not. Penelope said just the other day that she was ‘baking a bun in the oven and cake in the trunk’ with a little wink, and she’d had to excuse herself quickly for lack of a response. 
And Spencer wasn’t lying. He wasn’t complaining with any of it, not by a long shot. 
MONTH FIVE.  The one with the mood swings.
“So you guys really don’t want to know the sex?” JJ asked, sipping on her tea as she chatted with Bugsy who was balancing biscuits on top of her now protruding stomach. It was as if overnight the baby had stretched out enough to make themselves a damn penthouse suite in Bugsy’s tummy. 
“We want it to be a surprise, either way we’re going to love the little bean, even if they do keep kicking my bladder at four am,” She said, balancing the tenth cookie on the tower she’d made, reaching over carefully for another one, “I swear if the bean kicks my cookie tower I’m giving them a hideous name,”
“It’s good to feel the baby kicking at this stage, it helps develop their joints and bones so they’re stronger when they’re born.” Spencer inputted helpfully as he slid a fresh mug of decaf tea over to her desk.
“Next time the baby kicks your uterus walls, Spence, gimme a shout and we’ll discuss how great it is,” Bugsy said with a small smile and he paused, looking at JJ as if he was caught in a trap, suddenly well aware of his mistake. 
“Point taken,” He conceded quietly, and JJ chuckled because she’d seen Will just as hesitant to piss her off in both of her pregnancies. And she knew Bugsy would never hold it against him, that Spencer’s head just ran away from him sometimes. 
She halted her little game and carefully leaned over to draw the mug to her lips, too impatient to wait for it to cool down fully and she barely spotted Derek swooping around the corner of the desk.
“Good morning, Mommies and Daddy Genius,” He greeted in that chirpy tone, his hand snatching up the top cookie and scarfing it down before she could protest. 
Bugsy shared her snacks all the time, it was a no brainer that they took a bite here and there out of each other's goodies before they could get a smack to the wrist. And Derek had certainly noticed a few of his Rolos missing the last time he bought a pack, and a particularly cheerful Bugsy smirking at him over her desk. 
It wasn’t a huge deal, and yet Bugsy sat up in a gasp, and the entire biscuit tower fell to a crumbling mess on the floor. 
“Well done, princess, Hotch is going to-” Derek stopped mid sentence when he saw her sniffle, and his eyes widened at the sight of her eyes glistening with tears, “Bugsy- are you okay-”
“My cookies! Derek!” She whined pitifully, and she buried her face in her hands, “My cookies, I was so going to eat the shit out of those, they were gonna be so good, Derek,” 
Morgan looked gobsmacked, his head whipping between the woman leaning against the desk with an understanding smile and Spencer who was already rubbing her shoulders with his lips smashed together, trying not to laugh. 
“Honey, it’s okay, he didn’t mean to,” Her partner tried to coo, though he couldn’t help but feel sorry for the way Derek scrambled to draw out his wallet. 
“I’ll get you more, Bug, I swear, they sell them by the deli down the street, right?” He asked, jittering in his bones because he’d never made her cry before. He worried or a moment Hotch might just put him on sabbatical leave for such an offense. Emily would probably fly to Virginia just to cave his skull in, “I’m sorry, I’ll go get more, I’ll even get you strawberry milk-”
“Chocolate milk,” She wailed, and JJ slid a box of tissues over to the pitiful girl with a silent snicker. She remembered all too well the feeling of unexplained emotion crashing over her, and she didn’t doubt that the tough faced Bugsy would be back to normal any moment soon.
“Chocolate milk, got it,” Derek said, with a nod, and he all but darted for the elevators, in a hurry Spencer somewhat suspected was down to the fact he feared for his life if Penelope got a whiff of what happened.
Bugsy sniffled for a moment, drawing a tissue out the box and dabbing her eyes sullenly, her feelings slightly worse for wear even if she had a small inkling of doubt that she was really so torn up about the cookies as her body made it seem. 
But she had been thinking about them all morning; made herself promise she would only eat them once she got the stack fifteen high at least. 
“Are you okay, baby?” Spencer asked, his gaze empathetic as she snuffled her sobs into the palm of her hands. He wasn’t too worried, even if he hated seeing her cry just as much as anyone else did. And it wasn’t that he didn’t take her seriously. But when she’d been crying just that morning because her shower gel spilled on the floor and tipped almost all the way out, or even when she’d stepped on a snail walking into the building and smushed it into the ground, effectively killing it, he seemed to be getting used to her mood swings. 
She sniffed woefully, “I was really looking forward to those, and now I think I was too mean to Derek and…” Her eyes glistened with fresh tears, and the sight of it made Spencer sigh, leaning forward to kiss the side of her head because it must be difficult being so out of your usual self for nine months. 
“And what?” He prompted softly. Only she burst out crying again, reaching forward to drag him into a hug that told him she was feeling extra sorry for herself.
He wouldn’t blame her. Would sit through every weep and sob and tantrum if it meant he got to show her even more times over that he loved her endlessly. 
However he did have to hold in the giggle when she wailed; “I think I really do want strawberry milk,” 
MONTH SIX. The one with the false labour. 
She had been in Hotch’s office when she felt it. 
Embarrassingly so, her first thought was trapped gas. She’d gotten a lot of that considering the baby had decided it craved spice, and had been planning to excuse herself when it felt like her whole abdomen seized as if she’d been hit with a particularly nasty period cramp. 
Her hand flew to her stomach where she sat with Hotch reviewing her latest reports, the same quarterly check the whole team was mandated to have with their boss since Cruz became section chief. Hotch didn’t miss a beat, the folder in his hand hitting the desk in an instant as he tensed, looking at her with caution. 
“Are you alright?” He asked, and she held her breath for a moment. Spencer was out with Rossi giving a lecture in Washington DC, JJ had the day off for her mom’s birthday, Penelope and Morgan were taking Tara to lunch to show her a few more of their regular spots. It was just them and Anderson in the office for the next few hours, possibly the worst time out of any to have an empty floor. 
“Yeah- I just, woah,” Her stomach gave another lurch of a painful twist and her hand slapped on the table to keep herself steady. She breathed through the pain, because she’d had much worse only that wasn’t what was making her heart race. It was fear. Because she wasn’t due for another twelve weeks at least, and while she’d heard of baby’s being born as premature as six months, she knew premy babies suffered major complications later on, let alone the stress their body goes under during the actual birth. 
Bean, as the team had affectionately named the baby since the couple had firmly decided they didn’t want to know the sex, was about the size of red cabbage, tiny in the scheme of things even though it felt like just a few minutes ago they were a grain of rice. 
“Okay, it’s okay, stay calm,” Hotch said in a smooth voice, gentle yet reassuring as he rounded his desk in a flash and put his hand on her shoulder, “Do you feel like you need to use the toilet? Any back ache or irritability?” 
Bugsy breathed out through her nose as her lungs jittered with nerves, “N-no, I don’t need the bathroom, why would that matter?” 
Aaron stroked a large kind hand down her spine, watching her face scrunch in pain for a second time, and he slowly began directing her towards the door, taking small steps so she wasn’t rushing. “Needing to use the bathroom is an early sign of labour, it’s your body's way of helping expand your pelvis to accommodate the head. Any back ache or frustration at all?” 
He didn’t care that he’d had to repeat himself, not even when he was usually so against it, because he could feel the own unease rising in his throat like bile even if he tried to keep his face as neutral as possible. 
He would be damned if he let her see how worried he was, and so he swallowed heavily, holding his other hand out for her to take when they approached the stairs. Anderson was on his feet in seconds when he saw his unit chief leading the woman with a tightly concealed frown, fumbling around for his phone. 
“Agent Prentiss?” He exclaimed, darting around the mess of chairs and paper and desks to approach them, “Would you like me to call Dr Reid? An ambulance, perhaps?” 
“She's alright, I’m driving her to the ER, thank you Anderson,” Aaron responded politely, his hand still resting on her back, and the agent nodded, digging around for his keys. 
“I can drive, if you’d like to ride in the back with her,” Grant offered with worried eyes as Bugsy’s face crumpled in agony again, and Hotch’s head whipped to her, and his composure crumbled for a moment. 
“Bugsy, hey, it’s okay, we’re gonna be okay, honey,” He cooed, and Anderson was quick to open the glass doors, “Did you pack a bag at all-”
“No, Spencer told me I should but I said it was too early, why is that man always right,” She grumbled, her footsteps weary and jittery as the three of them got into the elevator. 
Hotch fought a smile, trying to remember everything he’d memorised before Hailey had Jack. The 5-1-1 rule blared through his head, and he glanced at his watch for a fraction of a second, and he wondered for a moment if he was going to have to write off a company vehicle for the fact his youngest agent gave birth in the back seat. 
“I’m afraid that’s just how Reid operates,” Hotch said, pulling his phone out to dial the man in question and let him know where they were headed, “It’s probably nothing, Hailey was getting cramps all the time once she reached her third trimester, but we’ll get you checked out to be safe,” 
“Really?” She looked at him with pitiful eyes and he nodded with a tight smile, committing to his illusion of calmness even if he swore he hadn’t felt so scared in months. 
Because it wasn’t just Bugsy anymore, it was Bugsy and her baby. Her and Reid’s baby. The two people who deserved their happy ending more so than anyone else he knew. 
And he felt her hand slip into his then as she accepted his answer, in fact she didn’t let go the entire time she waited on Spencer and Aaron was in no rush to leave her side. Even when she lay back on the table and had the midwife checking everything over, he stayed by her head (no doubt to avoid a very awkward conversation), stroked her hair when she fretted through a few more cramps, even when Spencer burst in through the door with Morgan at his heels looking like the two of them had just ran a marathon.
“Is everything okay- what’s wrong- do you need fluids- do you need ice-” Spencer rushed on his odd breath, his chest puffing with inhales, and he pretended he wasn’t seeing stars floating across his vision. 
“I’m assuming by your reaction you’re dad,” The nurse said, pulling off the blue gloves and dropping her mask from her mouth.
“Yes, he is, he’s dad,” Morgan filled in for him as Spencer all but fell back against the wall, because he really should have drank something other than soda and coffee this morning. He was close to swaying on his feet when he stepped over to his girlfriend, and she took his hand in the her own, or atleast the one that wasn’t occupied by Hotch’s tight hold. 
“Don’t worry, everything is alright with mom and baby,” She said, noting down a few things on her chart and the four of them took an audible sigh of relief, “Braxton Hicks contractions are very common in your final trimester, it probably felt like a lot because your baby is moving to into the anterior position ready for birth,” 
Bugsy��s head flopped back against the pillow in comfort and she forced herself to take a few deep breaths, willing her heart rate to go back to normal. Braxton Hicks, she should have known. Her head had been fuzzy the past few weeks as it was, but she supposed the moment she’d thought there might be something wrong with the Bean, all of her logic had flown out the window. 
But at least she’d had Hotch to keep her level headed, and-
“Oh my god, Anderson,” She jolted up, her legs stuck in the stirrups the midwife had place her into while she examined everything, “We need to tell Anderson, the poor guy was so worried,”
Hotch chose not to tell her he’d seen Anderson go as white as a ghost the second she’d turned her back, and instead patted her leg as Spencer went to speak to the midwife a little more, no doubt picking apart every single symptom she’d presented in that huge, worried head of his. 
“Don’t worry, I’m sure Anderson is fine, honey,” He said earnestly, and she looked at him like a kicked puppy, entirely sorry for the panic she’d caused, “Let’s just get you your underwear back, huh?”
MONTH SEVEN. The one where they decorate the nursery.
“What about Elias,” 
“Veto,”
Bugsy pulled a shunned expression as she carefully rolled the wallpaper up the wall. 
“Mason? Niko, stop,” She proposed, one hand on the wall while using the other to push the nosey feline away from the wet paste she’d been brushing on the wall. 
He sat politely at her chide, blinking at her with those big eyes as he watched her work with a twitching tail, almost entertained at the woman who had ballooned up in just a few weeks struggling to do a relatively easy task. 
“Hmm, Mason can go on the bench,” Spencer responded where he was sitting at the other end of the wall doing the same thing only much faster, though she’d argue it was a little easier since he wasn't carrying a large coconut strapped to his stomach.
They’d left the apartment just two weeks ago. Derek had been the one to help them cart their small amount of furniture into the modest house on the outskirts of West Springfield. It was large by Spencer’s standards, even if Bugsy had seen what grandeur looked like in her own childhood homes, but it didn’t matter. Because walls and floors and fancy grand pianos had never bought her love. Yet the first evening they’d spent in their new home they had slept on a mattress on the floor, the list of things to do the following day rattling around their heads. But they had a home. They had the picket fence with the nice school down the road and the bus stop within eyesight of the kitchen where their kid would one day walk to their door with a book bag and glasses like Spencer’s. 
She had never felt like she belonged somewhere until she had a home with him. 
“What about Ada for a girl?” Spencer called over his shoulder, where he had almost caught up to where she was still working on the small patch of wall. The paper was proving frustrating for her swollen fingers, considering the entire thing, when put together, made up a mural of little woodland creatures amidst a forest and left zero room for error, “Named after Ada Lovelace, the woman who pioneered computers,”
Considering it for a moment, she nodded, “That’s pretty. Ada makes top ten,” 
Flipping the last part up to stick against the thick glue, she ran her hands over the seams to be sure it aligned perfectly with the rest of the picture. Satisfied when it matched and a little fox stared down at her, she smiled, tilting her head up where Spencer was standing over her, watching her concentrate. 
“All done!” She chirped, and he bent down to give her a kiss to her puckered lips, sliding a hand beneath her arm to help her up. 
“Looks perfect, you’re really carrying the team honey,” He mused as she got to her feet with a little whine, wrapping her arms around his middle in a proud hug. 
“I know, what would you ever do without me?” 
He laughed, looking at her with an adoring gaze.
The light cracked through the open window, laying over her face delicately. The house was still bare, still in need of carpets and a good dusting, still had leaky pipes and ants in the pantry. Yes, they had a pantry now. But it was a start. It was a home. 
“I say we leave the cradle for another day, baby is calling for frozen grapes again,” She said, rubbing a hand over her protruding belly button and he smiled. Spencer could have sworn he was the luckiest guy in the world when he called her his friend. He thought maybe he should have bought a lottery ticket the same day she told him she loved him. The day she became his girlfriend he thinks he may have died and the past three years have been purely a dream. 
But watching the breeze kiss her cheeks and stroke her hair, watching her eyes rove over the room that would keep their baby safe and warm in just a few weeks, even seeing her smile at him like he had handed her the whole universe in a box when she was the one growing a whole human inside her; Spencer felt like his life was so much better than he ever hoped it would be. 
“Frozen grapes, coming right up,” He said, slipping his fingers in between his to help her down the winding staircase which had been a winner for her immediately. It’s like we have a castle, Spence. “You or the baby could ask for a whole damn ox and I’d give it to you.”
She laughed, holding onto the bannister as they headed downstairs to the kitchen that was in dire need of fresh paint. 
“What if I said baby wants a holiday to Cancun and another cat,” 
“I’d say baby is onto something there,” Spencer said, sweeping her from the final step and giving her a wet kiss to her head, “But first, grapes.”
MONTH EIGHT. The one where she gets cranky.
“Oh my god,” She groaned as she threw herself into her wheely chair, her button up shirt barely accommodating her stomach that was well and truly ready to pop.  
Derek Morgan loved her, he truly loved her like she was one of his sisters, dare say he had loved her since that day he’d carried her out of the church she was held hostage in by Cyrus. He had seen her at her rock bottom, had seen her graduate with flying colours, had even put his job on the line for her; covered her back from a stupid mistake at a bar when she popped a little molly on government pay. 
Derek loved her. He did. But the moment he saw her slump into her chair, her face scrunched up in frustration, he was collecting his mug of coffee and all but bolting for the door and heading straight for Penelope’s lair. 
“Back pain again?” JJ asked, flitting past a very frantic Morgan and heading towards Rossi’s office with a stack of papers in her arms. Bugsy let out something close to a growl in return, and JJ took it as a yes.
“I swear I have been pregnant for years,” She huffed, barely reaching over to where her keyboard sat at her desk. Tara nudged it forward for her to grab, because it seemed like she was on her breaking point enough as it was, and received a brief nod of thanks “I can’t remember a time when my back didn’t hurt, or my boobs were aching or my head wasn’t all fuzzy and weird and- OH for the love of god SWITCH ON YOU PIECE OF SHIT,” 
JJ’s brows raised as the keyboard mouse went flying off the side of her desk in protest, rolling straight past where Hotch and Spencer were strolling through the office, her boyfriend carrying the biggest Strawberry Milkshake he could find on this side of town. 
If Hotch wanted to say anything about her damaging property, he thought it smarter to keep his mouth shut as she swivelled to face the two of them, her expression already irritated by the worried stare they shot her way. 
“What?” She said with a bite, and Spencer raised his hands in surrender, which left her gaze to slide to Hotch. 
And Hotch loved her too, loved her more than he would ever admit. But he swore he the second her eyes clamped on his, Aaron Hotchner considered an exorcism might be necessary. 
“What, what are you staring at me for?” She snapped, throwing her hands out like a bratty teenager, and Hotch cleared his throat before he spoke, something embarrassingly close to fear shaking his vocal chords.
“Have you given any more thought to maternity leave, yet?” He asked and her eye twitched, and it was as if he saw the stapler was next on her list of things to send flying off the table, preferably straight at his head. “I would be more than happy to pull some strings so you take longer off after the baby is born, maybe even Spencer could start his paternity early-”
“What?” She said for a third time, like she was a broken record. And she knew she was being unfair, perhaps even cruelly so. But she would make it up to them later, when she was in a better frame of mind. Her underwear rode up and pinched where her uterus had begun to drop, her trousers itched for whatever reason, her face was hot from just walking from the elevator to her chair and that was just since she’d entered the office. She hadn’t got much energy for showers anymore and so washing her hair became some ugly affair where Spencer got in with her and did it for her, only last time he put a little too much product on and got the suds in her eyes and they had spent twenty minutes rinsing her face, naked and dripping wet, over the sink. She felt awful, awful for how she was being so irrationally rude, but it was like every inch of her being was uncomfortable. And there was still another month to go.
“Good god, man, don’t poke the bear,” Tara hummed as she passed, taking her own half full mug to the kitchen to escape whatever was rumbling in that hot head of hers. 
Hotch swallowed heavily, noticing how Spencer stayed deadly quiet no doubt because he’d learned his lesson in trying to force Bugsy into doing something when she was like this, “I’m saying I think it would be good for you to take some time off, you’ve both worked hard enough as it is and with the baby being so close, it would be good to take it easy for a few weeks-” 
She pressed her lips together, because she knew he was probably trying to help, probably trying to be considerate, and yet the heat of annoyance bubbled up inside her all the same like a kettle on the precipice of boiling.
“If you want the big scary pregnant lady out of your way just spit it out, Hotch,” She snapped, scowling at him in a way he remembered Hailey doing when he so much as sneezed too loud.
And he couldn’t find it in him to be mad at her. Because anyone with eyes saw she was uncomfortable, he knew if she was anything like his own ex-wife then she wouldn’t be sleeping nearly as much as she should, that more than likely their kid would be already kicking with long, scrawny legs to get out and show the world what they were made of. 
Hotch was saved from the firing line when his guess was proved almost immediately, and she groaned with a hand to her abdomen. 
“Spencer, would you tell your kid they’re not a linebacker and that my kidneys aren’t the damn ball,” She complained, and her partner flashed her a brave smile, leaning over her to rub where she was caressing her battered organs. 
“Actually, right about here will be your spleen since the baby has pushed everything around at this stage-” And with that Hotch darted towards his office because Bugsy looked ready to clip someone around the ear, and he didn’t have the heart to write her up for it.
Although for the sanctity of his team, he rushed her documents through the same afternoon and gave her an extra four weeks pay in lieu of a truce. 
MONTH NINE. The one with the birth.
It had been fourteen hours already when the doctor mentioned the word caesarean. 
“Caesarean? We never planned for a C-section,” Bugsy’s eyes widened where she was intermittently sucking down gas and air, Spencer patting her forehead down with an ice wet cloth. 
But then again she supposed she had never planned to go into labour when getting the laundry off the washing line while Spence painted the porch. 
He looked at her with nervous hazel hues where her face sparkled with sweat and water, her hand squeezing him tightly as another contraction hit. 
“I’m afraid we have few options left, Miss Prentiss,” The midwife said, a woman around her age that was already masked up after prodding around her cervix for a few hours, “Fourteen hours is rough on anyone and we’re not seeing any movement past your pelvis. Any longer and you or your baby might be at risk,”
And it was the truth, but it was a harsh one, and tears sprung to her eyes hearing those last few words. She had never had any delusions it would be easy giving birth, it was revered as the most painful thing anyone could go through, but she had assumed on a hope and a prayer that things would go smoothly. 
“I know it’s scary,” Spencer found his voice after a second, their hands clasped tightly together because there was more chance of snow in hell than there was he was letting her do this alone, “But, baby, you’re doing so well, and you’re almost there,” He said in a watery sweet tone, dabbing at her brow once more and the two of them exchanged a teary look, “It’s going to be okay, you’re going to be okay, they’re going to numb you for the whole thing and when it’s over we’re going to have our baby, huh?” 
She smiled ruefully because he was trying desperately to cheer her up, even though it sounded like he was reassuring himself just as much as he was her.
And she nodded, because she knew he was right, and more than anything she wanted their baby to be safe, even if it meant having her insides scooped out like she was some russian nesting doll. 
“O-okay, yeah, c-can Spencer stay with me?” She asked nervously, and the midwife smiled, pressing a button to call for the anesthesiologist.
“Ofcourse, honey. Just try to relax, we’re going to arrange an epidural for you,” She said in a voice that told Bugsy she’d practised staying calm in an emergency a thousand times. 
Bugsy breathed through her nose, feeling Spencer swoop in to wipe the lone few tears dribbling down her cheeks. 
“It’s gonna be okay, we’re gonna be okay,” He said, his voice bustling with nerves and she wanted to tell him the same, wanted to tell him she loved him more than ever for trying to put a brave face on for her sake. But she couldn’t, so she nodded frantically, leaning her forehead against his cheek and taking a few more deep breaths. 
“You’re doing great, honey, you’re being so brave,” Spencer reassured in his biggest voice, his hand carding over the side of her hot face gently. There was blood, there was so much blood, and the sound of her monitor was the only sound that was constant and not at all worrying with its steady heart beat. 
The midwives were flitting around the room, the lead obstetrician making careful incisions and handing various things Spencer didn’t want to see over to his co-workers. Because he loved their baby already, couldn’t wait to meet the mini him he’d been dreaming about since he was a boy himself, but Bugsy needed him first. She was his everything, his whole life, his whole universe fading between clear consciousness and a slightly loopy gaze as she relaxed on the table. 
“Is it over? Are they here, are they okay?” She slurred, looking over at him where his hair was covered in a blue scrub cap, his entire body wrapped in protective uniform to minimise the risk of infection on her body. 
He cradled her face again, shaking his head, “Not yet honey, you’re doing so good, it’s nearly over,” Spencer said, pressing his brow against hers because he had a mask over his mouth and couldn’t kiss her properly, “I love you so much, I swear I’ll try every day of my life to repay you,” 
“You’re being mushy, you’re freaking me out,” She joked as if she was her regular self, because the midwives had all warned him that the sedatives would take the edge off her nerves. And he chuckled, even if he was worrying enough for the two of them, sniffling behind the stuffy mask he had to keep on until she was in recovery. 
“I’m sorry, baby, I just want you to be okay,” Spencer said earnestly, and he pressed a kiss to her head anyway even if she wouldn’t feel it with his mask, “I’m gonna get you so many milkshakes when this is-”
There was a wail behind the curtain they had draped over her stomach, and both their breaths stopped in their chests. 
“Is that…” Bugsy started, her eyes wide and alert even if seconds ago she had been almost drunk, “Is that it- is that them?”
And another scream resounded around the room as if to answer her. 
Spencer swore he had never felt tears well in his eyes so fast until one of the midwives brought a wriggling, wrinkly bundle around the curtain, and within seconds he felt his cheeks sodden with tears. 
“Oh my god,” He said his smile reaching his eyes as the little creature was put on Bugsy’s chest, and it was only then he realised she was weeping too and he resumed his position stroking her head, “It’s a-”
“It’s a girl! Spencer, we have a girl!” Bugsy’s grin went from ear to ear, her eyes round and adoring at the ugly, scrunched face still screaming at them, her eyes closed and her skin covered in a white goop, “Oh my god, she’s so beautiful,” 
“I told you she’d take after you,” Spencer said, not minding the nurses sewing Bugsy up as they stared at their little girl, Bugsy’s arms holding her body weight delicately though she didn’t quite know what she was doing. 
Spencer was quick to remove the mask once they cleared him to, and the second he was freed he pushed his lips to his girlfriend’s, their mouths equally as salty and sodden as one another with the way their cheeks washed with tears. Pulling away, he looked at her in the eyes, the same eyes he’d always loved, the same eyes he’d know in any life, in any world, in any fog, and their smiles were damn near blinding. 
“I love you so much, I swear I’m going to make it up to you, anything you want,” Spencer said, kissing her again, his hand resting over hers where she held their baby girl on her bare chest. 
She didn’t have the heart to tell him she already had everything she’d ever wanted right there with her. 
“I love you so much more, Spencer,” She said quietly, the two of them pulling away when the little girl squealed again and they chuckled, quickly rushing to calm her cries as they looked at her as if they had yet to realise she was real and she was theirs, “Oh my god Spencer, you’re a daddy,”
“Bugsy, you’re a mommy,” He said with raised brows and she gasped, giggling with glee as her free hand flew to grab his face and pull him in to kiss her again, “We’re a mommy and daddy,” 
The two of them burst out laughing even though overjoyed tears lined their eyes again, and Spencer trailed a large finger down her chubby cheek softly, her skin shrivelled and pruney like she’d been submerged in a bath for too long. 
“Spencer, she’s perfect,” She said after a moment, her breath completely stolen when she took her in, the small head completely covered in dark hair, which she had already suspected would be there from the amount of times she found herself itching at her stomach. Her tiny fists waved in the air as her sobs subsided, beginning to warm up to the skin on Bugsy’s chest, and Spencer audibly choked in a cry of his own when her eyelids slowly blinked open and revealed forest hues damn near identical to his own. He pushed his temple to Bugsy’s again as she carefully swayed her from side to side.
“I’m never going to let anything hurt you,” He murmured, his breath warm on her collarbone and his baby girl stared back at him like she understood, even though he knew that was pretty much  impossible, “Either of you,” 
Bugsy sniffled with a wobbly smile, her hands shaking as she held her daughter up, “Do you want to hold her?” 
Spencer looked ready to wail all over again, not that she would ever hold it against him. The two of them had been weeping all day, and their kid was a real tear jerker to look at with her thick lashes and wide eyes. 
He was quick to pop open his shirt, holding his hands out nervously as she placed the baby in his arms, his fingers supporting under her head the whole time he brought her to his chest. 
Bugsy smiled, the midwife checking in with her for a moment before they were ready to wheel her into the other room to rest up, while Spencer looked entirely enamoured with the little bundle in his arms. 
He was a dad. He had made this beautiful, perfect little girl with the woman he loved more than anything in the world, and somehow she had given him even more reasons to feel so lucky. 
“Hello, you,” He said through bleary eyes, smiling through a chuckle when he saw just how tiny she looked in his arms, and he had never seen anything look so fragile, “I’m going to try be the best dad you could ever have, okay? I’m gonna be there for all the lame parties, and the sleepovers and the big games and every single time you need help on your homework, I’m gonna be right there with you.” 
“What name are we putting on the chart?” The midwife asked as Bugsy watched Spencer murmur to the sweet face that looked up at him in wonder, “Or is it just Baby Girl Prentiss for the moment?” 
“It’s Reid,” Bugsy said with a smile, as Spencer poured even more of his gentle heart out in promises she knew he would keep until the day he died. And she knew without checking with him the name they chose weeks ago was perfect; the one they’d decided on just a few days after the nursery was finished and she had yet another bowl of frozen grapes to chow down on while they admired their work. 
One for his mother, one for Emily. 
“Ana Emilia Reid,”
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sincerelybubbles · 2 months ago
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hi!! i love the shy!reader x hotch fics, but i was wondering if you could do a completely opposite dynamic? where it's like a super flirty and playful reader who's goal is to try to fluster and get a reaction out of hotch? <33 feel free to ignore !!
cannon typical violence, mentions of blood, hospitals. not my best but it's something!! ty for the request <3
"Any chance to get your hands on me," you say, breathless, as Hotch presses the fabric of his jacket into the wound at your side.
He ignores you, shouting for a medic.
"Nothing to say, handsome?" Leaning back on your elbows, you watch as Hotch focuses entirely on the injury. Anything to distract against the pain would be welcome but you'd be lying if you said you'd ever abandoned any opportunity to fluster the man in front of you.
"I have plenty to say to you," Hotch says, voice low, peering up at you from under furrowed eyebrows, "starting either with personal safety or inappropriate conduct at work."
"Inappropriate? So you have noticed the flirting." You're starting to fade, the telltale signs of an impending faint thrumming in your numb fingers.
"Okay, save your breath," Hotch implores, hands pressing harder on the wound, shouting for help again.
You're sure the paramedic's are on their way, you watched Morgan slam the unsub to the ground moments before, and you're certain enough in your safety to chuckle and send a wink to him, "ah, got other plans for how I can waste it later?"
It doesn't even make total sense but Hotch chuckles, exasperated, still. Slowly shaking his head, he lets out a slow breath. "You're more trouble than you're worth."
"We both know you don't mean that." Pounding head, flashing lights (ambulance, maybe?), ringing ears. Yeah, you're going to pass out. Before you succumb, though, you reach forward to pat Hotch's cheek. "You care too much to mean it. And hey, handsome?"
Hotch hums, eyes blurring in your sightline and refusing to come back into focus. "Don't freak out."
---------
"Morning, sunshine." Hotch is reading in the chair next to your hospital bed, case files resting on his knee. The pain on your side is incessant, constant and unignorable.
"Don't freak out?" Hotch asks slowly, shutting the folder without looking at you. "A proper warning that you're feeling like you're going to pass out would be appreciated."
"It's okay, handsome, I'm good." Hiding a wince, you sit yourself up. "See, I was right, though."
"About?" Hotch asks, finally looking up to watch you at your movement. You can tell that he sees your pain so you talk quickly to cover it.
"You care! About little ole me, how flattering."
"Of course I do. Do you want me to call the nurse?" You feel out of breath, cramps between your ribs, white hot pain settling.
"And interrupt our alone time? Never."
"Stop doing that."
"Doing what?" You're distracted, banter subpar, as you struggle to maintain even breath.
"Hiding your pain."
"I'm not?" You pitch your voice up, questioning, attempting to trip him up so that he forgets his original argument.
"You are. I know you better than that - you're usually better at this," he gestures between the two of you, setting his case file on the table beside him and leaning forward, resting his forearms on his knees to get a better look at you.
"What're you talking about?"
"Come on," he sighs your name, shaking his head and frowning at you. "Let me call the nurse if it hurts, you should sleep more."
"Trying to get rid of me?" You ask, flashing the smile at him that you always use to disorient others. Wide, all teeth, wrinkled nose, distracting distracting distracting.
It usually works but Hotch looks past it, catching the way your eyebrows pinch in the center.
"I'm calling the nurse."
"Stop, no," you reach forward to snatch the remote before he can grab it. You don't want to sleep, you want to spend more time with him, you want to get out of this bed, you want to stop feeling helpless as soon as possible.
"Seriously?" Hotch asks, half standing, leaning over you now.
"Seriously. I'm good. Maybe you don't know me as well as you think." You're half teasing, hints of truth littered behind the words.
You feel that way, sometimes. You're always fast to hide behind a tease, a flirt, a well placed laugh. You're aware it's a defense mechanism - do your best to make them love you superficially, they can't see the dirtier parts of you and run. Fluster Hotch so he can't see your attraction to you and reject you quicker than you can catch hope.
Hotch raises an eyebrow, settling back in his seat. "You take two sugars in your tea unless people aren't watching, then you add a third. You always triple lock your car, too aware that it doesn't do any good - we've all seen how little it matters in the end. You sit next to Spencer when he sleeps on the plane to help him with his nightmares when he wakes up, you pack an extra banana for early mornings to give to Morgan - you actually hate them, you just pretend to help him. You're more than you give yourself credit for."
Blinking slowly, mind sluggish from pain medication, you watch Hotch, fully aware that maybe you've been watched more than you've realized.
Slowly, you pass him the remote, a silent omission of relenting.
Perhaps it won't be so bad to be seen.
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keferon · 2 months ago
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Did I spend two hours writing this? Ha! No, why do you ask. *lying through my teeth* anyway come here Mecha au Texaid enjoyers. come get yall juice.
———
Vortex isn’t sure when it started. Doesn’t even dare to try to pinpoint the when, why, where and how of it. Just that it exists. Some forgotten feeling stored in the deep recesses of his somewhat intact consciousness that has resurfaced. It burns him, tears down at the steel walls he had formed around himself. Makes him feel like he’s being broken down then built up again. 
It’s a wonderful, terrifying feeling that eats away at him the more ‘he’s’ here. The more that secretly unhinged medic-turned-pilot crawls into his cockpit, every time getting more comfortable with connecting with him literally and figuratively. With Aid slowly coming to not outright radiate hatred with every encounter. Sharing stuff like music, who they couldn’t stand, and answers to the most stupid questions like ‘wha’s your favorite color?’. Vortex had cackled at Aid for that one.
At first he rejects the feeling. Stops it at full force, imagining it going through a trash compactor or being incinerated to ash. He makes himself believe it’s a game. Empty threats, flirtatious behavior and cutting banter puts him at the top 5 of First Aid’s Most Annoying Motherfuckers to Ever Exist list. A tidbit of information he is proud as fuck of.
But that denial came to a stop the moment Shockwave had stepped into his hangar while Aid had been in his cockpit, his visor the only shield to keep that creepo from getting near him. Vortex may have been a homicidal maniac, but there had always been something about Shockwave’s presence that made him feel suffocated even back when he was alive. It took some silent processing to realize—and goddammit he hates himself for it—how afraid he had been. Not so much for himself but for the little flesh bag hidden away inside him. 
It had rocked him, that’s for damn sure. When Aid had asked what made him different from all the other pilots Vortex had disregarded and killed, he answered truthfully at the time. ‘You treat me like a threat, like I’m the one in control of this power instead of you.’ And while that still held some merit, it changed kind of. ‘Threat’ turned into person. And the power that he holds became more and more of Aid’s. How easily Vortex was swayed into giving into Aid’s requests. 
The first one being to dissect that Quintesson. He had reveled in the way it squirmed and screeched, trying fruitlessly to get out of their grip. Vortex considered to simply rip it in half for fun, until he felt something from the connection in the drift. A sort of fascination and curiosity quietly humming through the link. Took him longer than he’d like to admit to realize it wasn’t coming from him but Aid. A drive to know how this creature worked, how to best take it apart to examine its insides. And before he knew what he was doing, Vortex did, cutting it as neatly down the middle as he could manage. He remembers the shudder of excitement from the link, at how different that alien was, how this information could benefit battles in the future. The bombardment of information and feelings had shocked him, though he of course didn’t show it, but it also sent a thrill of wonder through him. ‘This freak’ he had chuckled to himself, feeling as Aid leaned out from his cockpit to examine the creature.
After that he realized how dangerous this was. The power Aid unknowingly held over him, and all he needed were his words. But he found that he didn’t care all that much. Especially not when Aid would sometimes fall asleep in his cockpit after a grueling mission, and Vortex would snap his visor at anyone who tried to get him out. Moments like that made him wish he still had a human body. To flick the nerd’s nose, to ruffle his hair, to playfully shove him. Thoughts like those made his non-existent heart throb, sickening himself with those sappy sentiments. He will never mention this to Aid, you’d have to rip it out of his cold, dead conscience.
Standing in the hangar, he’s not sure when he had decided this promise to himself. Doesn’t even try to pinpoint when. But he knows that if this little ant ever died, he wouldn’t stop destroying everything in his path until he either killed the one who had done it, very slowly at that, or deactivated with vengeance still roaring through his circuits. 
OH I LOVE THIS SO FUCKING MUCH KFKFNFKDNHDKRKTNRJRMT
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moonstruckme · 3 months ago
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hiiiii mae!! hope ur having a good day/night, i was wondering if you would do a emt!marauders (or just remus) fic with a reader who maybe has past medical trauma or something so she really hates going to the doctors and avoids unplanned visits at all costs and one day she gets hurt doing something and she tells herself she’s fine but she’s really not (maybe she has like a concussion or something) and she tries to tell the boys she’s okay and she doesn’t need to go to the hospital but they’re like “yes you do u literally don’t know what day it is” and she kinda starts freaking out and they comfort her????
so sorry if you’ve done something like this you’ve written a LOT of fics (which is amazing i love them all) and i haven’t gotten the chance to read them all yet! anyways hope you have a great day i love ur fics so much!!!!!!
Thank you for your request, love you <3
cw: concussion, hospital mention, implied medical fear/past trauma
emt!marauders x fem!reader ♡ 770 words
“This is supposed to be the sort of thing that only happens to old ladies,” Sirius mutters. “Look at James, dollface.” 
James’ smile is encouraging. “He knows he’s full of shit. We see people fall in showers all the time, it’s not an age thing. You don’t have to be geriatric for soap to be slippery.” 
You know, distantly, that they’re both trying to keep things light for your benefit, but their playacting isn’t helping you. You feel trapped, backed into a corner, and your lovely boyfriends who only want the best for you feel like your captors. 
Sirius clicks off the light he was shining in your eyes just as Remus comes back with your clothes. They exchange a look you don’t like. 
“Here, sweetheart, put this on.” Remus helps you get a sweatshirt over your head, extra careful to hold the collar away from the aching bump on the back of your head. 
You stand from the bed bemusedly as he starts putting your sweatpants on for you, too. You don’t love the vibe of all this coddling, either; the boys are usually only this delicate with you when they’re very concerned, very pitying, or both. 
“What’s going on?” you ask, though you already know. It’s not as if you would usually hang about in your towel all night after a shower, but they’re getting you dressed for a reason. 
James’ brows twitch together sympathetically. Sirius’ voice is gentle. “Baby, we need to go get your head looked at.” 
Your upset blooms fast and hot, tears choking you. “Why?” 
“You have a concussion, sweet girl. It seems fairly bad already, and it could get worse.” 
“But you’re…you always say hospitals can’t even do anything for those.” You know you sound childish, whiny and difficult, but you can’t help yourself. Your boyfriends don’t seem to hold it against you. James rubs your arm while Remus pulls your socks on with sweet, lingering touches. A tear squeezes out of your eye. “Why do I have to go?” 
“You’re right, there’s not much they can do,” says Remus. His voice is calm and even, a balm to your frazzled nerves. “But a concussion can be dangerous, and without tests we won’t know how dangerous it is or if there’s anything they can help with.” 
“That’s all we’re going for, angel,” James says lightly. “Just some tests. It won’t take terribly long, and we can stay with you most of the time.” 
You’re hardly hearing him, shaking your head despite the way it aches. More tears crest your cheeks, your breaths wet and quick. “Can’t we wait and go tomorrow?”
“Oh, sweetheart.” James takes your hand, squeezing your fingers. “We can’t, my love, but it’s going to be okay.” 
“I really can’t.” You pull your hand from his, wiping underneath your eyes. Your hair is still wet from the shower, cold seeping into your fresh sweatshirt. “I can’t do it. Please don’t make me.” Your voice chokes into a quiet squeak on the last few words. 
Remus coos and sits beside you on the bed, wrapping you up in a hug. You cry into his shoulder as he rocks you gently, murmuring against the side of your head. “Please,” you try again. 
He holds you closer. “I know, darling.” His voice is a low whisper. “I know it’s hard for you, and I know it’s scary, but we’ll be there with you. It’s not going to be as bad as you’re thinking. What we’re going for is really very simple, and Sirius can explain it to you on the way, hm? You’ll be alright.” 
When you calm some, he goes to warm the car, passing you off to Sirius and James to get your shoes on. 
“Nothing’s gonna happen to you, baby,” Sirius promises, kissing the shell of your ear as he walks you outside. His arm is heavy around your shoulders and James is quick to take your hand after locking the door behind you, bolstering you for what’s ahead. “You think we’re gonna let you get hurt? This is going to be the easiest hospital visit you ever had. We run this place, they’ll have us in and out.” 
“I wouldn’t say we run it,” Remus says drily as you three pile into the backseat. “More like we engage with it, in twelve hour shifts, four to five times a week.” 
“But we do have lots of friends,” James chips in. 
“Exactly.” Sirius busies himself with wiping the last of your tears while James gets your seatbelt on. “Like the radiographer at Bellevue. You’ll see, baby. We’ve got you covered.”
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roturo · 2 years ago
Text
CRY FOR ME -dick grayson x f!reader
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① NEW REQUEST FROM ANONYMOUS!: sex pollen, old lovers meet again.
→ summary: He loves you, he really does, but he left you. Months wondering why he did that had you crying for him, never ending the never-ending cycle of the abandoned by Dick Grayson wasn't in your to-do list. It's time to hit him with a smile, rather than a goodbye that would leave him wondering.
→ warnings: SMUT, angst, sex pollen, mating press, breeding kink, marking, fingering & oral (f receiving), mutlipes orgasms, overstimulation, mention of weight loss (but it's never specified how much or the weight of the reader exactly, neither a body type), hero into villain!reader, med student!reader, mentions of kory and dick being together but never in a relationship, reader is friends with harley quinn, reader was part of the og titans.
A/N: I'm really proud of this one, might even do pt2 if it gets support. -Words: 3.4k
TUMBLR IS BASED ON A REBLOG SYSTEM. PLEASE REBLOG MY WORK. THANK YOU. ENJOY. SMUT BELOW THE CUT.
¨And you know what I hate most of all that shit he put me through?, He-¨
¨Can you please stop talking about Dick Y/N? It's been MONTHS, damn it! almost a year! You're driving me nuts! I'm not even Dick's ex, or friend and I already hate him as much as you do. So let's move on.¨
¨You don't understand, I was a good girlfriend! Shit! I even became a hero for him! Now look where we are.¨
Harley laughs at your remark of how the tables have turned.
Both of you were sitting at the top of a building eating some ice-cream, which Harley insisted on steal from a random kid on the street, after robbing some random store she liked a collar from, you were now looking at how police officers where trying to look for a culpable of this crime.
It's been 11 months and 5 days since Dick broke up with you. You couldn't AND still don't understand why he did it, both of you were fine one day and the next one he decided, 'oh how could I destroy the woman of my dreams heart?, I know how! What if I tell her I don't need her anymore in my life and she's useless! then some months later fuck some fire princess and act like i'm a new person with this new suit and name! oh! also, re-do the titans! when my ex helped me do the og ones, helped when the fell apart but she's useless anyways!'
To say you weren't deep down for him, would be a lie. You don't know how he could keep laughing everyday knowing how his little trauma ass dumped you like trash. Well, if you're being honest he doesn't have a small ass, but that doesn't matter.
¨Aw, I want more ice-cream¨ Coming back to earth after some deep thoughts, Harley grabbed you by the wrists in order to change up and start looking some restaurant for dinner.
After changing clothes and Harley talking about how obsessed she´s with the Joker, you couldn't quite blame her, both of you were finally walking on the street, laughing at some random inside joke both of you had.
¨Huh.¨ Your phone started ringing and you could swear if it wasn't cold enough to freeze you up, the call was. ¨Who is it?¨ Harley asked, sneaking through your shoulder.
¨OH! Donna?, the cute girl you talked about?¨
¨Shhh, let me attend this call... Hello? Donna?¨
¨Y/N, um- hello! How are you? It's been what? one year since we don't talk?¨ ¨I'm... fine. How about you?¨
You were quite confused for this call, on the outside you're calm, but inside, you're freaking out.
¨I'm good, it's nice to hear you're doing fine!¨ ¨Thank you Donna, but I know you just don't call to ask how i'm doing, what's wrong?¨ ¨Oh well, you quite know me well Y/N, i'm sorry it seemed that way, but you're like the only person I know who could help us with some medical issues, you know? So I wanted to ask you if you could come and help us to deal with Conner, and maybe stay some days...? i'll explain you who he is and all of that later.¨ ¨Donna, you know i'm not longer on the me-¨
Harley pinched you in the arm, trying to talk but you were faster. ¨Ow Harley! Stop it!¨ You told your best friend in a whisper so Donna couldn't hear the both of you, also covering the microphone of your phone, for... extra precautions.
¨You don't understand! This is an awesome opportunity! You're going undercover in the titans tower! Imagine how crazy Jack (Jocker) would be! Say yes!¨
Thinking it for a few seconds, she was right, you could get some important information from them, it was indeed, an awesome plan.
¨Who knows, you might also see bird-boy again!¨ She said raising her eyebrows in a teasing way making you roll your eyes.
¨Y/N? Are you still there?¨
¨Yes, when do you need me to be there?¨
¨Erm... now if it's possible¨
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You were now unpacking your suitcase, Donna told you to pack for at least a month, isn't that incredible?
You haven't come across any of the other titans, beside, Donna, Dawn, Gar, Rachel, Jason and Rose... Quite interesting team.
You didn't introduced well to the kids since you were in a hurry to enter your temporary room and not ran into someone else...
While you were unpacking your old tools Wayne gave you while you were their medical support 'hero' maybe also because you were a med student, you still helped with fights, bruises and hits.
You found the 'special' bandages you had for Dick, since the 'normal ones weren't soft enough for his bruises' a small smile appeared on your face at those old memories.
Now unpacking your clothes, you found three special lingerie underwear with a note from Harley:
'Just in case you have some fun ;)
xx Harley~'
The note made you roll your eyes but you couldn't deny it brighten your mood, throwing away the not and putting aside the 'Harley present', you continued unpacking your clothes, you brought in a separate case for your suit, just in case.
¨Y/N! Can you come here?¨
¨Coming!¨ maybe you could order the clothes other time.
When you entered the living room, the kids were no longer there, except Jason.
They started explaining you what happened between Deathstroke and what they know about Conner, you were paying attention to know what you're dealing with, you haven't even realize Dick came in sight until Dawn mentioned it.
But Dick didn't came alone, he was next fire princess which you couldn't care less to investigate her name when you found out about Dick meeting her.
¨Oh Dick! We brought Y/N so she could help us with Conner, since we don't have anyone else who knows about this weird medical stuff.¨ They know what happened between you two, and they still decided to ask for your help knowing he's going to be here.
You stood up from the sofa, eyes locking with his, you couldn't longer see the coldness in his eyes, but there wasn't warm either, you couldn't quite decipher what he's feeling.
¨Kory¨ She gave you her hand at which you responded with your name and doing the same. You locked eyes with her for a brief moment, a small smirk appeared in your face but disappeared once the greeting finished.
¨Y/N.¨ You locked eyes with him, a tension only the two of you could feel. You were different, much prettier, you lose some weight too, blame it on the break-up depression, but you were shining.
¨Grayson.¨ Hearing you say his last name instead of his name he could feel a small part of him getting shattered inside him, you changed.
After checking on Conner and taking some notes, it was finally night time, you were eating some cereal, knowing more about Gar and Rachel, Kory, Dawn, Donna and Robin were dressed up with their suits.
¨We have some issues to deal tonight with another troublemaker, nothing serious though, just a one night problem.¨ Dick announced while getting ready to go out.
¨Y/N, you should come! Maybe warm out a little like the old times." Dawn invited you, how nice of her, only if she knew you were also a troublemaker.
¨No thank you, i'm only here for medical support.¨ You gave her a small smile and said your goonights.
Some knocking in your door woke you up, it only passes one hour since you went asleep and they're already annoying you, first day!
¨Y/N? Are you awake?¨ You heard Dawn saying though the door.
¨Mmh¨ You replied.
¨We need you, it's Dick.¨
Even more annoying.
You walked next Dawn through the halls until you finally came into Dick´s room. Inside they were Donna and Kory, clearly concerned about his well being.
His behavior seemed, weird, there wasn’t any bruises or cuts, not even blood. He was just twisting in pain on his bed. You stepped closer to him, and got your hand on top of his forehead at which he only whined, that scared you, since it sounded more like a moan than a whine. He was hot, sweating and moving a lot.
You had your suspicions what this could be, but you needed to confirm it, this can't be real.
¨Can you please... tell me with which villain you fought with?¨
¨Ivy¨ Donna said.
Shit.
¨I need to make a call¨ you quickly said running out of the room.
¨Surprise, surprise!¨ Harley said in her taunting tone. ¨Oh my god Harley, I can't believe you.¨ ¨Well, you know a girl needs to help her best friend, so... I called another friend and voilà!¨ ¨What am I supposed to do? I don't have the fucking cure for sex pollen Harley! I owe you one, can't believe Ivy did this for me.¨ ¨You just said it, sex. C´mon Y/N!, it's your moment to play with him! He had you like a sad girl, why don't turn her into a mad girl? Make him cry for you. Break his heart like he did with you.
You ended the call, and just in time, Kory came. ¨Y/N, we need you Dick keeps talking about you and rambling about some stupid things.¨ You could sense a strange behavior from her, like if she just discovered something big.
Watching Dick twisting in pain and saying your name in just some black briefs felt good. You can't lie to yourself Harley was right.
¨It's sex pollen¨ You admitted.
¨And what's the cure? Do you have it? That's why you made the call?¨ Donna asked.
¨No, the only cure for it it's well... sex. The pollen might last for at-least 3 days or even a week, symptoms are well... extremely high sex-drive, dehydration, high temperatures, and... I think that's all.¨
Donna chuckled at what happened to Dick, ¨Let's go girls, let's leave this to Kory.¨ Dawn just laughed at a very shocked and blushed Kory, ¨Don't be like that Donna, Kory and Dick haven't confirmed anything yet.¨ You felt your jaw clenching, but decided to act calm, and when all of you were almost leaving, you were stopped.
¨No. I want her.¨ Dick said, pointing towards you. All of you stayed quiet at the sudden confession. You were shocked to say at least, blood rushing to your cheeks, you were about to leave that damn room until you remembered what Harley said.
Cry for me.
Donna grabbed your shoulder, looking at you. ¨You don't have to do this if you're uncomfortable.¨
¨No. It's okay, i'm in.¨
After mentally preparing yourself, bringing some water bottles into the room, they left you alone with him.
You sat next to him on his bed, memories came back flying around the both of you.
¨Look, I know that-¨ He completely cut you off when he started kissing you, making you lay down on the bed, you left a small moan when he broke the kiss for a moment.¨Oh my god, you don't know how much I wanted to kiss you again.¨
Did he missed you? Every question that came to your mind was easily erased when he started kissing and sucking your neck while unbuckling your jeans and taking them down with your underwear, he pulled apart to admire the bruises he left, he grabbed your panties and threw them to his nightstand.
He started kissing your thighs, making small pauses on each to make sure he's marking you as his again. Every time he went higher until he gave a small peck on your clit. ¨I can't wait to taste you sweetheart.¨ There it is... the nickname.
He got your legs over his shoulders and gave a testing long lick on your pussy, teasing your hole. At which he started sucking your clit once he heard the high pitched moan you did when he teases your hole.
His started spelling his name with his tongue on your pussy at which it only made you hornier, suddenly he inserted his index finger inside you. Dick sped up, fingers now flicking in and out of you at light speed, nose pressed into your clit, and before you knew it you were cumming, shuddering on his mouth, crying out his name.  Quickly he took all the remaining clothes from you and him, now both of you completely naked for each-other.
He was rock hard. No, scratch that, his cock looked like it was made of fucking ruby. Red and painful and already half-soaked with pre-cum.
He pressed your legs impossibly closer to your torso, moving down to meet your eyes, until you were folded in half beneath him, legs on his shoulders, putting you into a—
Oh. 
Oh. 
This was going to be a long night.
He fell on his forearms, and you wondered how much more you could take- He laced his fingers on top of your head, thumbs on your forehead, holding you still. He mumbled out another gonna make you feel s’ good before pounding you in earnest, practically bouncing you both on his mattress. His balls smacked against your ass, and the feeling was so damn satisfying that he just had to go harder. You would sport matching bruises tomorrow, his hips on your ass. You pushed out moans in time with his unforgiving pace, a metronome playing the beat to which his sanity danced away from him. 
“More?” He sounded fucking pathetic, like he was asking himself that, his voice octaves higher than it usually was, but he didn’t care. “More, you little slut? That what you want? You want more?”
“I’ll give you more,” he babbled, “More, baby, give you more give you everythin’ gonna fuck you so hard you won’t walk for weeks.”
He’s not too worried about hurting you—you’re already so wet—more that he’s afraid he’ll cum the second he starts moving again. Out of his previous partners, he doesn’t think any of them have felt this good around him.
“Please-” a strand of incomprehensible begs and pleads leaves his mouth when he starts thrusting into you again.
¨Shit- how are you even tighter huh? You've been keeping this tight pussy just for me?¨ He's a whiny mess, small kisses every time he cans, praises here and there.
“Mmm yes please yes please yesyesyesss—” was all you could manage. He laughed at you, breathless, and you wondered how he could keep up this pace and still rattle off incredibly filthy little comments, looking right in your eyes. 
“You’d like that? Yeah? Gon’ look so pretty, little baby, so pretty full of my child, yeah? All round and glowing and heavy with me. All of ’em will look at you and see me, all me, see that I did that. You want that? You want that you want that—”
He leans forward to coo praise into your ear, gently nipping at your earlobe. Goosebumps raise along your exposed flesh. The sound of skin slapping on skin echoes through the stairwell. Sometime during this his teeth find the soft muscle of your neck, leaving a crescent shape mark that’ll certainly bruise in the morning.
You're pretty sure everyone on this tower have heard the both of you fucking like rabbits by now, but knowing this was going to follow him his whole life, with the memories of him fucking you every way possible just so you could leave him, it's all you need to don't care about that.
The first time he cums, he doesn’t even realize he has. He shudders. It felt good—a bit too good—but nothing out of the ordinary. It makes him do a double take. His cock doesn’t even go soft. Drips of cum run down your thighs, pooling on the bed-sheets beneath you.
His thumb traces circles around your clit, moving in erratic, uneven motions. Dick leans back down for another kiss. You can taste yourself on him, though it’s not entirely unpleasant. Your arms wrap around his neck, holding him to your chest. The two of you can only fuck and cum until you’re too exhausted to continue. You’ve never felt so full. The thought of using protection crossed your mind once—and only for a moment—the pollen leaving you too desperate to care.
Second day and he wouldn't give you a break to nap for a minute.
His body curved and bowed, hips pressed hard against you, arms below your body and hands gripping your shoulders. “Mmm fuck baby,” Dick muttered into your mouth, your moans coming out of you almost breathless. “Yeah, yeahyeahyeah milk me fucking milk my cock gonna cum in you fuck a baby, my baby into you and you’re gonna fucking take it take it nnngh —”
He buried his face into your neck, teeth latching on to skin, biting down to draw blood, a choked groan as he came, really came, his balls squeezing painfully, a deep ache in his gut, indescribable tingles all along his cock, his spine, down to the soles of his feet.
Third day, and you started getting him where you wanted it.
“Sensitive,” you hissed, “Sensitive, Dick, you insatiable—”
“Insatiable is right,” he said to you, eyes wide, still looking like you just told him the Earth was flat. He towered over you, kneeling now, and with horror and a bit of something else you felt how hard he still was. 
¨I missed you so much, the biggest mistake of my life was leaving you.¨
Fourth day he started getting sensitive but that didn't stopped him, and he was a little more languid, strokes slow and smooth, his thighs shaking just a bit as exhaustion started to settle in. His cum was spreading in a pool on the sheets now, and you couldn’t bring yourselves to be even a little disgusted. He loved it. He loved so much how it felt that tears dropped from his eyes every-time he felt that electric shock come to him when he was about to come. He was crying for you.
Last day. Fifth day. Barely even thrusting anymore, just a slow grind of his hips, the friction and the pressure and the raw sensation squeezing out what could have been an orgasm if only both of you were awake enough to feel it.
When you both woke up the next day, he was staring at you, straddling your hair, and that's when you knew it.
¨Good morning sweetheart.¨
You just answered with a small ¨hey¨
¨I never through of seeing you laying next to me again, it felt like home. I'm sorry I did that to you, you don't know how much I regret it, please, give me a second chance.¨
Bingo.
Without saying a word, you grabbed some shirt of his, long enough to cover yourself and went back to your room, stumbling and shaking someway you made it. You changed yourself, taking a minute to observe how he marked you, it was time.
You went back to his room, already changed, you gave him a smile and sat on the bed with him, with no emotion behind your eyes, it was your time.
¨You were ready to leave me for her.¨ Confusion, first stage he made you go through.
¨I was doing fine, really, but then you walked again into my life again and fucked me up.¨ Sadness and lies. Second stage.
¨You think this will make me stay?¨ You signaled the both of you. ¨You think with just some stupid sex to heal you is enough of an apology?¨ A laugh escaped your mouth. ¨You thought this was real?¨
¨You know for a fucking fact this wasn't supposed to happen.¨ You got your hand on top of his, faking a caring smile looking at him.
¨When friends of yours make jokes about how you always leave them, you think it's funny, but it's not. That hurts a lot, actually.¨
You got up from the bed and stepped closer to the door, you paused for a second and turned around to see a hurt Dick naked on the bed with just some blanket covering him.
¨And Dick... Of course I still love you, if it wasn't for me, I would go crying and throwing myself into your arms again.¨
¨You still can.¨ He tried.
¨No.¨ You chuckled. ¨I won't let myself get hurt again. Our love isn't worth the fight. Goodbye Dick Grayson.¨
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angxlofvenus · 2 years ago
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hi, hi, hi! could I request the brothers + diavolo during a meeting together when their s/o (the mc) starts to doze off and then suddenly faint? Turns out, the MC forgot to drink water that day-
That happened to mr a few days ago, it wasn't fun - so here's a reminder for you to drink some water too :')
Thank you so much for the request!!! I am so so sorry to hear that happened, I hope you're doing better <3 If anything in this post seems insensitive please let me know! Have a wonderful rest of your day/night
Genre: Mostly fluff, Some Hurt/Comfort Ship: Demon Brother+Diavolo x reader (individual) TW: Minimal cussing, mentions of fainting, mass panic, yelling, second person pov for reader (If I missed anything please tell me!!)
When You Faint
You watched as the clock slowly ticked by the minutes as the Demons around you spoke amongst themselves, Your talking had slowly come to a stop as the room started to spin, Some of the men looked at you strangely but nobody expected you to fall out of your chair and onto the council room floor...
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Lucifer
He's immediately up out of his chair
Oh lord, he’s now fully in mother mode-
Barking orders at everyone, Yes this includes Dia
As soon as he gets over to you his wings are out, shielding you from everyone else
Once you come to, He isn’t letting you out of his sight
And once he finds out you fainted because of dehydration? 
He would so buy you one of those big ass waterbottles 
One of these mfs
Mammon
Freaking out pt. 1
Definitely hootin’ and hollering
He is indeed making a scene
Won’t really be on you until after you wake up because he knows Lucifer and Diavolo can do more for you then he can
After you have awoken though? He isn’t letting you out of his sight
You don’t have to worry about remembering to drink water, He’s there to remind you now!
Humans are such fragile creatures and now that he's seen that firsthand, He will barely let you do anything
He will make sure you are healthy whether you like it or not dammit
Levi
Freaks out pt. 2
Somehow freaking out even more then Mammon
He doesn’t know what to do! He leaves his room one time and this is what happens!
Will kind of just stand there in shock as everyone erupts into chaos
He isn’t the best example of someone who looks after their body lets be honest
But when ya’ll are gaming You’ll start to see some more healthy options popping up in the mix of chips and soda
He will beat himself up over not noticing, Please comfort this man before he decides you resent him
He won’t ever really bring it up but rest assured, It will never happen again
Satan
Would also run to your aid
He has read a lot of medical books in his time, He knows what to do
Would take you to a doctor afterwards, just in case
Kind of beats himself up for being unaware of your condition
I don’t think he’d freak out as badly after the incident, He knows it was probably a one time thing
Will bring up in conversation casually if you’ve eaten and drank water today, just to be sure
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Asmo
Screams
Freaks out pt. 3
Yelling at Lucifer/Satan to do something!
Will be all over you as soon as you’re awake
Don’t scare him like that! 
Will get extra pouty when he learns why you passed out
Has Ya’lls self-care sessions meant nothing to you?!
No more of that, not on his watch
He will offer you water at random times throughout the day
Studying? Water! Watching Tv? Water! Sleeping? Water! no, no, Beauty sleep is important
Beel
Doesn’t knows what's happening, Why are you on the floor?
Will stand on the sidelines concerningly as he watches Lucifer take over, He trusts his brother to help you
Will also feel immense guilt he didn’t see the signs, He just wants to keep everyone safe 🙁
When he thinks Ya’ll are doing something too straining for a human, He’ll stop to ask if you’re okay/ need a break
Will start carrying around a water bottle specifically for you 
Belphie
He totally wasn’t sleeping when it happened, nope
Woke up to his brothers and the Prince of the Devildom freaking out around you
I don’t think he’d really get too involved with helping since he doesn’t actually know wtf just happened
If you don’t immediately perk back up, He’s gonna cuss out Lucifer and maybe try to fight him
Gets a little snappy at everyone (except you ofc) after the incident
He even started to set alarms on your DDD as reminders to drink water
Will tease you just a teeny bit, But you can tell how worried the entire thing actually makes him
Diavolo
Was over to you in record time
Commands everyone to step back from you while he calls Barbatos and a royal doctor
You will be given the best treatment don't worry
He thinks he's being very sneaky about making you drink more water He is so obvious about it, it hurts
You will definitely notice how Barbatos now almost immediately refills your glass as soon as it’s half full
Another one to openly ask if you’ve drank enough water that day
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seungfl0wer · 4 months ago
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*𝑮𝒊𝒂𝒏𝒕 𝑯𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒕, 𝑮𝒊𝒂𝒏𝒕..*
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Pairing: Changbin x Reader (Fem)
Genre: Smut
Warnings: Giant!Changbin, Human!Reader, Unprotected Sex (P in V), Creampie, Size Difference of course, Oral (F), Fingering, Small mentions of blood, half proof read, Sorry if I missed anything.
A/N: I’m really proud of this one I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. Also this is just super fluffy as I always tend to do when it’s Binnie.
Find The Halloween Master List Here
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-🎃
The words that had just fallen from your lips were unexpected to him “you do?” He said softly looking down at you. “I.. I do.. I love you changbin.” You said looking up into his beautiful brown eyes.
The giants village was half in rubble from a freak accident. Two dragons were fighting overhead, one winning letting the other crash down to earth. It took out so many buildings, thankfully though no one was injured badly. You lived not too far from there coming to the village to lend a medical helping hand. That’s where you met Changbin. A big brute who helped rebuild the building, helps find people’s belongings and even lended a hand to you.
At first it was just ‘thank yous’ to one another for helping. Then you noticed he came by more often, sticking around to ask you little questions. He started to stop by with food and stay while you helped people.
A faithful night however as you were walking the road back to your place barely leaving the village you felt a big claw wrap around you. A werewolf that had been watching you walk home at night finally came to claim you. Picking you up as his sharp claws dug into you. You let out a blood curdling scream before his squeezing knocked the air out of you. Changbin who had just left you a few moments ago heard you cry. His body moving before his mind could even register sprinting his way to you. The werewolf took his free hand as he cut your clothes snarling at the soft flesh. “Stupid human, should know better not to wonder around at night. I bet you’ll taste absolutely delicious” he spat drool dripping from his mouth on to your torso.
Before the werewolf could even sense changbin, he had him by his scruff pulling you away from him. The werewolf snarled clawing at him trying to get back him meal. His claws got him across his chest, and slightly nicking his lip. Changbin with one file swoop through the beast against a tree. His body fell limp to the ground with a whimper “if I ever, catch you anywhere close to her again I’ll snap you and make a coat out of your fur.” He threatened the werewolf. Changbin held you bridal style trying to carry you as gentle as he could back to the village. His heart pounding looking at your limp body. The slight red color seeping from you where the beast claws dug.
“You’ll be ok. You have to be ok. God please be ok!” He mumbled over and over under sprinting now to get you to a doctor. You laid on the table as the doctor stitched you up, giving your body a once of making sure he didn’t break any bones. Luckily besides the cuts you were alright. Changbin never left your side, only stepping to the side to take a damp cloth to his cuts. He took the shirt off he was wearing, putting it over your head. He smiled to himself at how cute you looked in it, it was so long longer than a dress like a big blanket.
He didn’t know what to do he didn’t wanna leave you there alone. So he took you home, laying you In his massive bed, covering you with blankets making sure you were comfortable. He left water by the bedside for you and went to the living room. He slept on the couch not wanting to make you feel uncomfortable. He laid there staring at the ceiling feeling guilty. “Why didn’t I just have you stay? Why didn’t I just fucking walk you home” he felt a tear roll down his cheek before rolling over. He drifted off to sleep at some point waking up every so often to check on you.
After that moment he stuck by you, watching over you closely. You two spent alot of time together spending nights at his house when it was late. You started to fall for him, fast and hard. The little things he did for you always made your heart so warm. His hugs were so comforting, this big brute was just the biggest most loving teddy bear.
He felt himself fall more for you over the time. He was scared of his feelings though, not wanting to scare you. Afraid he’d push you away if he’d ever confess. How could he think you’d like someone like him? I mean was he the ‘tallest’ giant? No. Compared to others he was tiny. He still towered over you though, being a little over 9ft. His built was also something to be wildered. What he lacked in height he made up in muscle. How could this beautiful soft small creature like you like someone like him?
You leaned your body against his shivering a bit. “You cold?” He asks. You nod the night air being a lot cooler than expected. He smiled pulling you into his lap as he wrapped his big strong arms around you. The warmth quickly making you feel at ease, his touch was always so gentle. You felt your cheeks heat up a bit, your heart skipping a beat.
“My personal heater” you giggled leaning back into him. His heart was pounding feeling you so close to him. You felt so content against him you let out a happy sigh looking up at the stars. “Changbin” you said softly as he hummed in response “I’m happy I met you.” You said fingers running over his, he felt his heart jump into his throat. “I’m- I’m happy I met you too” he said back. A few moments had passed before you spoke again. “I love you” you whispered out, the words coming out without you even realizing. The words that had just fallen from your lips were unexpected to him “you do?” He said softly looking down at you. “I.. I do.. I love you changbin.” You said looking up into his beautiful brown eyes.
He couldn’t believe what you had just confessed to him. “Why?” Is what came out when he tried to speak making you almost giggle. “What do you mean why? Because you’re the most caring, sweet, kind, funny and not to mention handsome man I’ve ever met. You make me feel so comfortable. That’s why.” You rambled.
He didn’t say anything his body leaning down into you, lips meeting yours. He kissed you softly lips moving as gently as possible against yours. You turned your body straddling him as best as you could as you kissed him back. His hands resting at your waist as he took everything in right now. He was kissing you. He. Was. Kissing. You. Not to mention, you just fucking confessed! His head swirled with thoughts only bringing back to earth by the feeling of you rocking your hips against him.
He groaned against your lips his cock twitching under you. You were so warm, so fucking warm against him. His mind racing with thoughts as your clothed cunt drug against his length. You nibbled his lip hands wondering his body, over his muscles frame. His body was felt like it was sculpted by the gods themselves. So toned, so perfect. “Bin” you said ghostly against his lips. “Want you. Want you so badly.” You said eyes pleading at him. “Are you sure? I’m not like human men y/n I’m sure you can feel that. I don’t wanna hurt you.” He spoke eyes worrying.
“Changbin. I trust you with.” You said kissing him softly “please?” You begged. He felt himself crumbling, how could he deny you anything? “I’m gonna have to prep you really well, but I’m sure you won’t be complaining” he said cockily. He picked you up laying your body against the cool grass he quickly pulled your pants and panties down. His hands wondering your body accident ripping your shirt as his hand went under it. “S-sorry” he said embarrassed. You rolled your eyes “I can get a new one don’t worry silly” you said ruffling his pretty curls.
He smiled kissing your tummy his big hand coming up gently playing with your breast as he left soft kisses to your inner thighs. “I’ve dreamt of this moment for so long” he said before moving closer to your core. He stared at your glistening folds licking his lips. “My beautiful little bun” he said before diving into you, long thick tongue pushing its way into you. His hot breath against your folds and his nose rubbing against your clit. Your body arched into him shaking at his touch as he worked his tongue into you.
He slurped at your folds, licking up any juices that dare drip out. His fingers pressing against your clit before his mouth attached to it. You were a moaning mess under him, moaning his name as his fingers pressed against your entrance. As he pushed them into you, drool trailing down your cheek mind going blank. “Bin- fuck” is all you could muster as he finger fucked you. He curled his fingers into you nibbling at your clit. You clenched around him your high ready to flood from you. Your body moved riding his fingers as you chased your high.
“That’s it bunny use me, fuck- use me” he groaned. He moved a hand down to slowly push his pants off his rock hard cock springing out of its confines. His red tip leaking heavy precum wanting nothing more to be buried into you. You gripped his hair pulling him into you as you rode his finger. Your high quickly crashing over, your body trembling as changbin lapped at your juices. He moaned at the taste of you hand coming to rub at his cock as he made sure not to waste any of you.
“You positive about this?” He asked looking up at you. “Changbin. If you don’t fuck me I might die” you said teasingly. He chuckled as he rubbed his tip up your folds “I guess I don’t have a choice then” he teased back. He lubed his cock up with all your juices rubbing it against your folds getting himself nice and coated. “Really sure?” He asked one more time. “Changbin. Fuck me.” You groaned pushing your hips down a bit against his tip. “Alright alright impatient” he said with a little chuckle. In all truth he was scared of hurting you, scared his break you.
He slowly pushed this tip into you it filling you up. If he didn’t prep you there was no way he’d even be able to fit. The stretch was a lot but god did it feel good. He slowly pushed into you inch by inch filling you to the brim. When he was a little over half way into you he started to move. His hips moving slowly his hand coming down to toy with your clit. “Y/n you feel so fucking good.” He moaned out. He moved at a grueling slow pace dragging himself against your walls. “Need more” you said grabbing at him pulling him closer to you.
You kissed him sloppily moving your hips into him. You needed him to go faster, needing him close just needing more. Your grinder against him hips meeting his thrusts. “Binnie please faster, need more. Please” you begged. He obliged as he was chasing his high. His balls full of need to release as the smacked against you. “Tell me if it’s too much ok?” He said in almost a whisper as he moved faster his cock head hitting deep inside you. He pulled you close to him arms keeping you snug against him as he fucked into you.
Your body trembling at the pleasure his fingers still working at your clit. “Cum on my cock please- fuck y/n make a mess on me” he cried out feeling your cunt clenching around him. “Shit- you’re gonna milk me good- fuck y/n!” He babbled out. Your body shook as you came hard around his cock squirting all over his torso. “Changbin! Fuck- fuck- I love you!” You mumbled out. His body stuttered at your words, those words again.
“Y/n- I love you! Fuck” he said kissing you sloppily again. “Please say it again. Never stop saying it” he begged out. His thrusts became sloppy moving inside you hitting your gspot hard. You felt another strong orgasms working up “Changbin! I love you! I love you so much!” You almost screamed out. You felt his cock twitch in you his hands gripping at you pulling you fully down on his length as his balls unloaded into you. He moaned loudly, almost a roar as he did. He felt you cumming around him again making him jerk out of you from you clenching so tightly.
“Y/n- shit- I’m so sorry I should have pulled” he said before getting cut off by your lips. “Shut up” you said softly making him chuckle. “Changbin. I love you.” You said staring up into his eyes. “I love you too. Y/n I love you with every fiber in me. I love you” he said kissing you lovingly. “This means you’re all mine right?” He said with a grin. You rolled your eyes “of course dummy” you said teasingly. “I’m never letting you go” he said holding you close to him. The night air feeling so good against your warm skin. He held you tightly while you both caught your breath rocking back and forth as he whispered sweet nothing to you. Telling you how much he truly loved you.
Who knew a big brute like him has a heart to match his giant size.
﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌
💙 If you’d like to read more of my stuff you can find it Here: Master List . Thank you for reading and if requests are open or you just wanna talk feel free to send me something🩵
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Halloween Taglist: @ldysmfrst @kissesmellow21 @satosugu4l @do-you-remember-summer-127 @xines16 @minh0scat @troublemaker02 @tr-mha-fan
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after-witch · 3 months ago
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Yandere Overhaul x Reader on their period headcanon + drabble
Synopsis: The title sums it up!!!
Notes: yandere, kidnapped reader, reader gets their period, misogyny, humiliation, period-based shaming and punishment 
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“Oh, you dear thing–you dear, sullied thing.”
Predictably, he is not the nicest about the nature of your period. Although there is an inherent oozing, cooing condescension in regards to anything medical which causes you pain or discomfort, your period is a little… trickier.
It is, objectively in his mind, so very dirty, after all. 
Of course, there is the mess involved. His germophobia makes him feel ill in regards to most bodily functions, and that does include menstruation.  It is something of a conflict for him, because he does feel he should take ownership of your medical needs, but he has zero desire to be involved in anything related to bodily function. 
But don’t think that means he gives up control during that time of the month. Barring a medical reason, he chooses your method of menstrual hygiene: pads, and pads only. Why? Because tampons can cause toxic-shock syndrome, and because he’s a freak who doesn’t want to imagine you putting anything inside but perhaps, down the line, with careful planning and utmost cleaning, his dick.
You will be solely responsible for the disposal of your pads, however, and he takes it seriously. He’ll instruct you–distaste obvious on his face–to wrap them first in the provided plastic liner, then in several rounds of unused toilet paper, and then into special biohazard bags. Yes. Biohazard bags. Punishment will be swift if you disobey him on this–he’d find any straying from this necessary “hazard” treatment abhorrent. 
He’ll instruct you to clean yourself exceptionally well during your period, too. He has a tendency to instruct you while you bathe–gaze to the side, if you’ve been good–and he would want you to take special care to wash your privates during that time of the month. It’s humiliating. Patronizing. But if you don’t do it, he’ll force himself to take the reins and do it for you–something you definitely don’t want. 
On the other side of things, he gets a twisted satisfaction from treating your other symptoms. Feeling weak or lightheaded? Cramps? Backaches? Wanting to simply curl up and sleep it off? Those trigger something thickly patronizing in him–and he’d want to take care of you.
It’s a very strange sort of pampering, in which he is both hands-on and, due to his distaste for menstruation, hands-off. 
He’d forbid you from engaging in anything too strenuous. You should be in bed, dear. Resting. You’d get a pillow to shove between your legs. He would provide you with a heating pad, and supervise you the whole time, lest you misuse it and burn your skin. 
If you behave, you can have medication to ease your pains. If you don’t, well, biology has seen fit to suitably punish you, hasn’t it?
He will absolutely line your bed with incontinence pads in case of any “spillage” in the night. Anything that gets stained goes into a biohazard bag. 
Overall, it’s not a great time. You’ll start dreading your period because while he doesn’t exactly mistreat you during that time of the month (withholding medication when you aren’t “good” notwithstanding)-- he treats you like you’re some sort of mildly dirty thing that needs to be carefully handled. 
Your skin burns fire-hot and you keep your legs pressed together, hands covering the fold of your nightgown over what you know is a blood-damp patch. There hadn’t been any signs of your period coming this month–but considering the amount of stress you were under on a daily basis, it was no wonder that your body was a bit out of sorts.
“There’s no use lying to me,” he says, voice low behind the mask. There’s displeasure in it, yes, but something else, too. Something that makes your stomach curl up, slimy and humiliated. 
Disgust. 
“I didn’t–I’m not–” You cross your legs again, and feel the cool damp patch in your underwear move. An unpleasant sensation made worse by the man standing in front of you, acting like you’d done something awful by merely getting your period in the middle of the night. 
If only you’d woken up before he came into the room. You might have been able to rush into the bathroom and hide the underwear, maybe, or–your mind whirs for ways you might have gotten out of this situation, but everything ends up being a dead end. 
You’re not supposed to open the dresser by yourself, so he’d know if you got a fresh pair of underwear and a new nightgown. And where could you hide the soiled clothes, exactly? Nowhere. Maybe you could have set them in cold water in the sink to soak, but no doubt he’d make you scrub the sink with disinfectant if you’d tried that option.
You’re left with nothing to do but move your hands and stand up and stare at your bare feet as an awful, sludgy mixture of humiliation and anger courses through you. It makes your stomach clench and roil–or maybe that’s just a lovely effect of the time of the month. 
“I didn’t mean to,” is what you finally manage to say, eyes burning a hole in the soft carpet at your feet. Apologizing for what used to be an eye-roll and irritated sigh moment in the mornings where your pad had shifted or when you’d started while you slept. Apologizing for daring to have a biological function that–like most biological functions–made him comfortable.
He hums, softly.
“Of course you are, dearest.” You still can’t look up at him. It’s enough to hear the low ripple of discomfort in his voice; enough to know that he finds you dirty. 
And maybe that’s part of the shame. That someone who has no trouble going on about your purity, about the need to keep you away from the dirtiness of the outside world, sees that dirt in you once a month between your legs.
“No need to delay it any further, hmm? We’ll get you disinfected and properly dispose of those clothes.” You wonder if he’s looking at the stain on your gown, now; is he imagining the way the stain must look underneath, still damp on the plain white cotton underwear he gives you each day? 
You keep your eyes trained to the floor. It’s better not to know. 
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cashmoneyyysstuff · 7 months ago
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a/n : WAAAHHH another event organised by @queenpiranhadon THE QUEEN HERSELF !! this sm fun, hope yall enjoy !! lovely banner was also made by @queenpiranhadon IS THERE ANYTHING SHE CANT DO OMG.
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modern au, fem reader, merman shoto, maybe ooc shoto but ehh were havin fun, shoto is very touchy, mute shoto for plot, shoto iq too handsome for his own good, shotos a prince, shoto is very inlove w reader but its all inoccent, shoto n reader are both in their 20's, reader has a dog ! fluffy fluff fluff, sorta cliffhanger, theres a lot of stuff not mentioned bc i like romance and nothing else, little hints of soulmates, falling in love quickly the events don't play out exactly like the fairytale but it's inspired !
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walking on the beach is supposed to be relaxing. and usually, it is. there’s nothing you enjoy more than the sounds of the waves crashing and the wind howling in your ears. inhaling the sea air as max digs into the sand, barking out happily at every new big stick he’d found.
except this time, it’s not a big stick. but a big..person.
a human. person. unconscious you hope, you pray, sprawled out in the sand with clothes absolutely torn to shreds.
so yeah, not very relaxing.
it's been a few minutes since your dog had barked for your attention a little further down the beach. you'd happily giggled at first, thinking your dog might've an extra long stick for you to throw him only for you to see what looked like hair from your field of vision. and then an arm, a leg and now here you were.
anyone's first instinct should be to call an ambulance, of course he could be injured ! so with a start, you grab max by his collar to prevent him from licking off the handsome--you feel a little bad for gazing at him while he's unconscious/dead but you have to be honest--stranger's face off, and pull out your phone to call emergencies.
you look back down to check on him one last time only for him to be wide awake.
"oh, shit !" you squeal with a start, landing right on your ass from your crouched position over him. the man is unmoving at first, but gets up with a light groan. you want to help him, you really do, but you feel like someone's glued your butt to the floor.
this man you thought was dead seconds ago, about to call the ambulance for, has awoken. looking around aimlessly before his eyes land on you. he looks almost..entranced by you.
yet all you can think about is how gorgeous he is. a part of you still feels bad about it.
then he's a hair away from you and you can't breathe. you squeak embarrassingly loud, shooting up to your knees.
"um !" you gasp "hello..?" you back up a bit but he pays it no further mind continuing to blink at you. "are you okay? um--do you need medical assistance ?" from what you can see he doesn't look injured, so you're relieved, but you still want verbal confirmation.
except all he does is open his mouth a couple times before immediately closing it again. you blink at him and he blinks back at you.
"do-are you..okay ?" you ask tentatively, the man is unresponsive and you're seriously getting freaked out. "i- it's okay, we'll get you some help, lemme just.." you readjust to finally move and call emergencies, but something stops you.
a very cold hand is wrapped around your arm. you squeal at the chill, dropping onto your ass in front of the man. again. you don't want this to become a recurring thing at all.
finally the man gives you a response..sort of. he graces you with a shake of his head. his hair flows around softly and some water droplets fly off at the movement. he doesn't want you getting him help ?
"no ?" your eyebrows furrow "you..don't want help ?" he shakes his head again. you can tell he's trying to convey something but he can't seem to get it out. you wonder why he won't speak, and then you realise: he must be mute.
and now it's starting to make a bit more sense. you still wonder why he doesn't want paramedics involved. and you're mind races again, maybe he's a criminal on the run ?!
you blink, being brought back to reality by the handsome man who's sopping wet, freezing cold yet it barely seems to faze him with his grip still on his wrist. freezing to the touch yet you barely feel it with his eyes on you like this. he points to himself, then raises his thumb up. you're so lost in his eyes it takes you a moment to realise what he's saying.
i'm okay.
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somehow, the man ended up staying at your house.
you know nothing about him, not his name, his age, though he looks about your age. you don't know where he's from or why he was in the state he was in but somehow he's ended up coming into your home.
you let him look around your house to his hearts content. this man is the epitome of strange, he seemed curious of everything in your house, even the dry clothes and the shower you offered him.
after explaining to him how your shower works, and he'd changed into fresh new clothes, the biggest tracksuit you could find, you find yourself currently looking at him watching tv, seemingly entranced. you've got half a mind to warn him about sitting too close to the tv since he's sitting right in front of it on the floor, but you decide against it
you know nothing about him, but he seems not to know anything..at all.
you don't know sign language, you have no idea how to communicate with him, you wrack your brain, scratching at your head with a huff. the sound seems to alarm him and he turns to you with a cute tilt of his head, you can somehow guess he's trying to ask you what's wrong, his eyes seem to be clouded with worry. you feel your skin heat up.
"i'm alright, thanks." he seems to understand. he nods, it seems his attentions gone from the tv to you as he keeps inspecting you. his sudden rising from the floor causes you to jump a little, eyes wide as he sits down next to you and softly bounces on the couch. he seems surprised by the softness of it as he bounces a couple more times and that does manage to get a giggle out of you.
he looks up at the sound and his eyes are fixed to yours again "nice huh ? i bought that when i first moved here." he nods, focused. it gives you the confidence to continue even though his intense gaze makes you a little anxious. "i slept on this for a while before i was able to actually buy myself a bed." you giggle, suddenly overcome with nostalgia. you'd moved to your small town about a year and a half ago, you were still young, freshly graduated when you decided to leave it all behind. your big bustling town, you're family and everything that you knew. you thought it was time for a new start, as big as your hometown was it felt extremely suffocating. you needed something new.
the first few months were a struggle, something to get used to. but you'd managed. you'd found a yourself a nice job with a nice pay. some nice neighbours and nice coworkers and the sweetest little (?)english sheepdog. said dog had gotten quickly attached to your unexpected guest, excitedly jumping all over and licking him. your guest though startled at first didn't seem to mind. even placing his hand on top of max's head as if to pet him and being surprised by the softness of his fur. he seemed to like soft things.
you shake your head, deciding to focus on your guest. who's eyes have not left yours. you don't know if you can get used to that. "so um..where are you from ?" he perks up at your question. grabbing your wrist so he could softly pull you over your window to point outside where you'd found him. his skin is considerably warmer now that he's not drenched, it makes your cheeks tingle how easily he grabs at you.
"uh, no that's not what i meant," you chuckle nervously, but he's adamant. shaking his head and pointing outside again. towards the sea. the sea ?
"the sea ?" you ask incredulously "you came from..the sea ?" he nods, almost excited that you'd figured it out..the sea ?
okay, there could be a rational explanation for that..maybe his boat got lost at sea..sure it was plausible, but that's never happened in your quiet little town. everything about this man was unusual.
at your doubt, the man's eyes widen just a bit. and it looks like he gets an idea because he starts pulling you over to your bathroom. you're trying to reason with him and get him to slow down, but he seems intent and set on getting to your bathroom.
"hey, what're you--ah !" you cover your eyes quickly when you notice him taking off his clothes, heart speeding up as you squeak "wha-what the hell are you doin' ?!" then the water starts running, and then nothing. you're curiosity peeked, you glance at him through your fingers and don't see what you'd expected. instead you see..scales? and a tail ?
and then your hands fall from over your eyes, and you fully see it. the mix of white and red scales, they shine underneath the light of your bathroom.
a tail.
the man you rescued from the beach has a tail and isn't a man at all.
you've got a merman in your house.
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shoto is running late.
usually he's on time, but it seems the universe was against him today. his father had held him back with an endless lecture that seemed to drag on. he'd been more on edge, so to speak, since his son's coronation was approaching, a day he was absolutely dreading and everybody seemed to be on his back about it.
his sister had also held him back earlier. just for a chat she'd claimed, except shouto could tell it was a clumsy attempt to try and get some type of answer out of him, of why he's been sneaking off so often. she had lamented to him about her worries with his fascination of humans and their strange inventions. fuyumi was the only one he'd confided into about his collection of strange objects from the human world. tossed into the sea or scavenged from shipwrecked boats if he was feeling a little risky. however, what had started off as an innocent interest started becoming dangerous, in his sisters eyes, as he slowly started rising up to shore. closer and closer to humans.
she'd warned him to be careful, that humans were dangerous. shouto knew of the tales that were told about humans since he was young, of the unspeakable things they did to his kind. of course he did, but he just had a feeling not all humans could be like what he was told. as usual, he waves her off with the promise that he'd be vigilant as he swims off again.
he hopes he makes it in time.
someone calls for him suddenly and he stops in his tracks, the voice sounds familiar and he recognizes his fluffy haired friend izuku swimming up to him, shoto is tempted to ignore him. but it'd be mean, and unbecoming of a future king of the seas, so he waits for him to catch up. izuku midoriya was his one and only real confidant, his family had worked for his ever since they were both young and even if he was technically his servant, he could confidently call him his friend.
"hello, izuku." shoto greets simply, izuku quickly returns the greeting, before looking around to make sure they wouldn't be heard.
"were you going up to shore again ?" he asks nervously. shoto hums, nodding softly "i am." izuku stiffens, his fins flicker nervously.
"i-i don't know if that's the best idea.. i mean, your coronation is coming up and your father is even more on edge than usual-"
"what he doesn't know won't hurt him. which is why i'm expecting you not to tell him anything."
"of course not ! but his majesty is..." izuku cuts himself off, looking off to the side "i fear he's getting suspicious of your..activities?" he explains, wording it as best he can. shoto holds back the groan bubbling up in his throat: so many worries piling up and so little time.
it's unbecoming of a future king, but shoto decides he'll worry later.
"i'll think about him later." the disdain in his voice is palpable, but izuku being used to it doesn't react. he knows the relationship between the king and his son has been more than strained ever since the queen disappeared. some say she simply vanished, or left of her own volition, while other whispers claim she was instead captured by humans.
but after her disappearance the queen was never mentioned again, neither was the princes older brother, touya, when he disappeared not long before his mother did. the mere mention of them was forbidden, it was wiser to act is if they never existed in the first place.
izuku shakes his head and quickly swims up to follow the dual haired prince, who'd started swimming off in front of him.
both men finally rise up to shore. izuku hides besides a rock protruding from the sea floor while shoto decides to be a little bolder, peeking up to his chest from where he's perched up on the rock as well.
"ah ! shoto, you shouldn't !" izuku warns, but he simply shakes his head "it's fine, no one's here at this time of day." his eyes never leaving the sand in front of them, surveying the area like a hawk. he purses his lips. maybe he had been too late after all. he'd have to wait until tomorrow.
until he spots a mass of fluffy grey and white hairs. both he and izuku shrink back at the sound of a loud booming bark, shoto not as far sunk as izuku. then his gaze locks on to someone walking along with the furry beast.
a human.
the green haired merman has half a mind to warn his friend they should make their leave, however the young man is unmoving, seemingly entranced.
shoto breathes a sigh of relief, you've shown up at last.
it's usually at this hour that you walk along the beach with your companion. shoto's been watching you for a little while now and he's determined a routine. some days you stay longer than usual, but he's content to see you anytime, all the time. you're fascinating, the way you move around with those..legs of yours is something he can't his eyes off of. and you're breathtakingly beautiful to him, though is his father were to see you he's sure he'd think otherwise. he'd been told humans were hideous beasts, but he's never seen anything in all of the seas as beautiful as you in his years of living.
izuku snaps him out of his trance, urging him saying they should be on their way back lest the king get even more suspicious of both their absences. he wants to keep looking at you, forever if he could. part of him even wishes he could walk along the sand with you.
but he retreats after a final look to you, and dives back down towards his home, so far away from you.
he wished he'd never went back home though, when his father had decided to get on his last nerve yet again. constantly nagging, constantly berating him like he knew any better. lecturing him about how his behaviour was unacceptable for a future king.
he knows that, he's heard it all before. as he swims further and further away from home he wishes it could all just stop. this future king talk, the coronation. he wishes it could all just fucking cease.
and he wishes he could be with you above all else. you'd understand, you wouldn't nag him about his duties. hell, you wouldn't even have to know, you'd just see him for him. and that's all he wants.
if only, he wishes.
until he's being lured away by some sea creatures who for sure mean trouble, but they've intrigued him with promises of making his wishes come true. when he's suddenly faced with the sea witch, he knows he should get away and fast, making a deal with her was not advised if you cared for your own life.
..and yet, she says she can give him what he truly desires. and what he desires is a life where he doesn't have to gaze at you from afar. where he can only dream and wish for if only's.
and he can't turn back now.
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it takes a lot longer to get used to the fact that you have a merman in your house. you've been glued to the tv in shock for an hour, not processing anything happening on it while the merman in question casually watches, munching on some candy you'd offered him when you'd first made it home.
it's funny, if you think about it a little bit. you're friendly with your coworkers yet not a single one of them has ever been to your house before. and now you've got a fucking mythical sea creature in sitting on your couch eating watermelon candies.
truly hilarious.
you catch a peek at him from the corner of your eye, you're surprised by how easily he's entertained, especially since he's only looking at an informercial but you think you can understand why now. why he seemed so confused, and maybe this was also why he can't talk ? but he could understand you perfectly.
god, your head hurt.
there's a weight against your skull and when you look up from your lap, the merman has his head pressed to yours. you hold back a squeal, because you are beyond tired of embarrassing yourself in front of him, a harsh intake of breath leaves you. he tilts his head at you, you've gotten good at de-cyphering what he means in the two hours you've known him. you sigh.
"i-i'm alright..thanks" you speak sincerely, his shoulders relax but he doesn't lean very far away from you, visibly comfortable being so close to you. "i'm just..in shock..i had no idea mermaids even existed..!" you chuckle, then quickly cover your mouth "merman, sorry !" he doesn't seem to mind, shaking his head with a barely there smile. it's a faint pull of his lips that could've been missed but you'd caught it and your heart hammers in your chest--were all mermen this pretty ?!
"well..um, i bet seeing a human up close like this is pretty surprising too ?" he nods and you laugh. "is it what you expected at least ?" he nods again, but it feels..softer, more personal. like it was directed at you and you only, for some reason. the close proximity between you both seems familiar.
you're everything he expected and more.
"do you..have a name ? ah !" you catch yourself quickly, running off to your room, not before telling him you'd be right back, you barely see him nod with widened eyes. you pull out a random book you left unfinished for..you don't remember how long now.
if he understood you speaking, maybe he could understand how to read ?
it's a possibility and you lose nothing by trying.
you're back next to him and place the book between you both, he leans in closer, inspecting the words on the page with an unreadable expression.
you tell him your name, and start spelling it out with the letters on the page. you hope it works, that'd make it a whole lote easier if it does, so you ask him for his name.
it takes him a second, but soon the dots start connecting, and he slowly points to five different letters
s-h-o-t-o
"shoto.." you sound out, you look back up at him. his face is soft and the small smile on your face makes you smile too "shoto ?" and he nods happily "it's nice, i like it." you admit, his eyes shine brightly and he points to you and nods. you think he's saying he likes your name too, so you thank him with a giggle and your hunch his confirmed when he smiles just a little wider, the corner of his eyes crinkling.
seriously are all mermen this pretty ? it's a little unfair that more mermen don't show up in town.
but you think even if they were to suddenly appear, you'd like shoto the best.
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shoto seems to have superhuman abilities, besides the not being human part..
in only a week, he's learned how to write and you've been communicating by passing notes and using a white board you'd gotten him while you were out shopping, you figured it'd be easier and a little less confusing.
he's been here for two weeks now, and it's been fun. so fun in fact you forget he's not human with how easy he's adapted into your life. he goes shopping for and with you sometimes, he loves watching and he likes to take walks with max, the both of them being inseparable. you'd be a little jealous if it wasn't so damn adorable. you're still enjoying your break from work and shoto makes it much more enjoyable, it's nice to have someone else around for a change.
you've..talked, about a lot of stuff with shoto, but one thing he will not talk about is himself, and you've decided not to pry. especially because you hate seeing the conflicted, sad look on his face. he talks to you about his kind, and his friends, but never too much about himself. you don't pry, but it surprises you that even mermaids have baggage.
"is there anything you wanna do today, shoto ?" you wonder if he ever gets bored, he doesn't say anything about it, but you know you're not all that entertaining..maybe you'll take him go kart racing.
shoto stops petting max to grab at his white boards, quickly scratching something down.
can i watch a movie with you ?
your heart stutters. every time you suggest an activity for him to do he always adds you in it. it's stupidly endearing and makes him cuter than he already is.
"but don't you wanna do anything else ? " he tilts your head for you to continue "like..aren't you bored ? i know i don't do anything interesting...you don't wanna do something more exciting ?"
he blinks, and writes down something on his white board that has your mouth go dry.
i like doing anything because you do it with me.
"o-oh.." you mutter, fiddling with the texture of your couch, picking at it softly "that's nice.."
after a moment of quiet he presses his head to yours, as affectionate as ever to get your attention, you blink up at him holding up his whiteboard and a smile forms onto your face.
movie ?
you let him pick this time.
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"if you want to be able to live with your beloved.. you must manage to do one thing.."
a kiss. a true love's kiss.
shoto has seen a lot of kisses in the few weeks he's been with you. he remembers the first kiss he'd received was when your elderly neighbour had knocked at your door thinking you were home while you were at the grocery store. she must've thought he was your mate, because she'd congratulated him and told him to treat you nice because you're a very sweet and pretty girl, which he'd intensely nodded at. she'd grabbed him by the shoulder and softly pressed both her cheeks to him, and you'd explained to him that she had kissed him as a sign of politeness. a common human courtesy.
he'd seen kisses on tv, kisses on the street, but none of them compared to the description of a true love's kiss. none of them felt fitting enough.
something on tv catches his eye. the movie has gotten to the climactic scene, a new term he'd learned. and the main love interests are desperately clinging to each other. their lips are touching, but it doesn't look like the kisses he's seen before..strange.
it confuses him, so he taps your shoulder and writes his thoughts down.
what are they doing ?
you clear your throat, your eyes widen. your eyes are so pretty. "they're kissing, shoto.. we've seen that before right ?"
but it looks different.
you hum in thought "well, i guess i can put it like.." you purse your lips in thought, you look so cute when you're deep in thought. "they love each other a lot, so being away from each other made them..um, do that. it's 'cus they care about each other alot..i think."
love..
have you done that before ?
you splutter as your eyes fly across the whiteboard, shoto shuffles so he can sit closer to you. you don't move away, you smell so nice.
"n-no..i don't think i've loved someone enough to.." you whisper, gaze flying from him to the small space between you both.
the sound of the white board dropping to the floor doesn't alarm you, neither does the way his hands slowly reach towards your cheeks. he does nothing but run his hands across your cheeks for a while, simply gazing at you. he presses his forehead to yours and you feel his breath his your face, your eyelashes flutter as his head softly bumps against yours. his nose nuzzles against yours, you're so soft.
you don't have to read anything to know what his eyes are asking you silently, you nod anyways.
shoto doesn't exactly know what love means by humans standards, but by his standards and the little he knows he thinks this might be it as he presses his lips to yours. it's not as desperate and dramatic as on tv, and there's no melodramatic music playing in the background.
but he loves this, he loves you.
you pull away when he presses you back against the couch, and suddenly something feels different. your chest feels warm. you feel loved.
"that..was nice..woah." you breathe, and shoto nods, mirroring the smile growing on your face. what you don't expect is for him to open his mouth and speak.
"it was.." he hums, your eyes are the size of saucers and he huffs out a light laugh "do you think..i could do that again with you ?"
you nod, in a trance, but as he leans in you grip his shoulders. he blinks up at you
"..wait, how long were you able to talk ?" you're unblinking, and it makes him chuckle lightly.
"just now." he answers simply, before you can ask more questions he stops you "i will explain later, i promise." he nuzzles his nose to yours "but for now.." he kisses your cheek "i'd like to learn about this..love feeling.with you." he kisses your other cheek, always adding you in "will you let me ? "
you're willing to let him do anything as long as he does it with you, as long as he keeps adding you in like you're the only one that matters, you want to keep mattering to him. and you want to learn more about your feelings too.
so you laugh, and with a smile, you pull him back into you.
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a/n : eeeee i loved participating to this event theheheh ! tumblr quit deleting my drafts but i still had tons of fun ! hope yall enjoy reading MUAH MUAH !!
taglist ! : @queenpiranhadon @starieq @lovelyiida @lady-ashfade @angels-fantasy
@seonne @sweetnans @vexis-world @2melamoo2 @tootiecakes234
@4evapika
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demonic0angel · 2 years ago
Text
Hotel AU
Jason groaned, holding a military grade field dressing to his wound as he tried his best to walk faster. Gunshots rang behind him and instinct allowed him to dodge, but one bullet still managed to graze him by the shoulder. It only made pain flare up worse, but Jason just sucked in a breath through his teeth and toiled onward to get to safety.
His comms buzzed in his ear, but no one was available at the moment. Jason still muttered a soft, "Requiring backup."
No one answered.
Jason, for an existential crisis-having moment, wondered if he was gonna die again.
Just as he thought this, a hand grabbed him by the arm and pulled him into another building.
Jason cursed and pulled out his gun with his unfortunately injured hand and pointed it towards his assailant, but then paused.
He had been pulled into a beautiful, first class looking hotel area.
"What the..." he started, before he turned.
An enormously tall woman smiled down at him. She was outrageously beautiful, with long red hair tied into a ponytail and a neat uniform covered by an apron. "Welcome, sir, to the Phantom Hotel! You seem to be in need of some assistance, would you like some help?"
Jason felt eerily calm and level headed, even as he bled all over the floors. "... that'd be nice." He said gruffly.
"Right away, sir." She said with a smile. She waved to someone over to his side and continued to speak. "I'm the co-owner of this hotel, you may call me Jazz. May I get your name for registration?"
Jason still didn't freak out yet. "Registration?" He echoed, as he took in his surroundings.
The hotel was beautiful, with tall ceilings, marble floors, white walls and candle chandeliers that glowed with dim lighting. People that didn't look like Gothamites milled around the lobby and sitting area, all relaxed and chatting amicably. There were a few that were dancing to club music. There was a noticeable bar in the corner of the room that looked unstaffed but was conspicuous in its size and black coloring.
"Yes, sir." Jazz said. "I assume that you're staying the night? We offer breakfast in the morning, and drinks are free all night!"
Jason was silent for a moment. A person wearing a similar uniform to Jazz, with a dark green vest and dark colored apron, approached them and immediately got to bandaging Jason's wounds.
Once again, Jason did not freak. He felt oddly calm, and in the back of his head, he knew that he was safe here. His gut instinct was to collapse on top of Jazz and take a nap, strangely comforted by her presence.
"... why am I so calm?"
Fuck it. He decided to just voice his question.
Jazz giggled. It was a cute noise. "Why wouldn’t you be? There’s nothing to worry about. We're the same, after all!"
Jason blinked. Then he turned to her as the attendant stepped away with the medical box, Jason feeling all healed up, and he said, "Is a night here free?"
"For you? Yep! Everything is free here."
Jason gave a nod. "Then I'll take a room with a single bed, please. Breakfast is free?"
"Yes, sir."
"Great. The name's Jason Todd."
Jazz smiled, a sparkle in her eyes that made Jason feel all fuzzy with warmth. "Very good, sir. Your room number is 312, on the third floor. Here's your room card." She handed over a plastic card that was procured out of thin air but Jason didn't think about it.
He was mentally exhausted and being in her presence made him feel like he was going to drop and fall asleep on the floor and still wake up refreshed. It was so disconcerting that it was almost not disconcerting.
Jason eventually found the elevator, though not without lingering a little around the area. The vigilante in him was telling him to be careful, even though everything else inside of him couldn't give less of a damn and was telling him to kick back and relax. Jazz, after registering him, had gone to the bar to prepare drinks.
She mixed together alcoholic concoctions amidst a small crowd and the more Jason stared, the more it seemed like the dim light was hiding something. People looked like they were wearing ragged clothes and a lot of them had dark stains. There were quite a large amount of old people as well, along with people with seemingly missing appendages.
The last two details wasn't a bad thing, but the amount of them seemed like a hint to something bigger.
When Jazz made eye contact with Jason, she gave a sweet smile and a little wave, and that was Jason's signal to leave.
He got into an elevator, went to his room, and practically sank into the cloud-like bed before he basically knocked himself out. That night, he had never slept so well.
When he woke up, his body felt rejuvenated and he almost felt peppy. It was as if his previous irritations were only bad days and he had finally struck on a good day for once.
He washed up, miraculously found his wounds all healed up, and when he went to take a shower, his clothes were found on the sink, all washed and patched up. Even his helmet had been cleaned and fixed, pristine like the day he had first gotten it.
Jason could've been more suspicious.
But to reiterate, he couldn't.
Everything about this place was like a mother's hug. It was comforting. It made him feel safe. He felt like there was nothing to worry about and although a small part of him found this alarming, he really couldn't explain why he decided to trust it.
When he came down the elevator for breakfast, he was astonished.
Last night, the hotel had looked elegant and high class. Now, in the morning, everything looked warm and homey.
The various large rectangle tables had turned into small round tables that were densely packed together. The floor was a cool blue carpet and the walls had turned a shade of cream. The ceiling had shrank, but now flowers and vines grew from it, dropping from the ceiling with bright blossoms. The bar had been replaced with a little coffee area, with a young man behind the counter, currently taking orders.
The people sitting around and eating their breakfasts looked different in morning light. They glowed with faint shades of blue and green.
Jason paused to take in the sight, considering this information before he shook it off and approached the counter.
The man, after noticing him, immediately went to the cash register with a large smile on his face. "Hello!" He said cheerfully.
Jason immediately noted the similarities between him and Jazz. They had the same heart shaped face, the same ethereal beauty to them, the same nose and smile. This man, however, had bright blue eyes and dark black hair that swept over his eyes.
"What are you drugging me with? I'm way too comfortable here." Jason blurted out.
The man paused. And then he burst out laughing. Jason couldn't help the few snickers that fell out of his throat too, but they both quickly calmed down and the man explained softly, "We're not drugging you. You're just comfortable here because it's where you belong. Don't stress too much."
He continued to smile reassuringly. "Call me Danny. I'm the owner. What would you like to order?"
Jason's eyes flicked to the menu and then he said, "A California club croissant and a caramel latte, please."
"Coming right up, big guy!"
Jason moved a little bit away to the side so that other people could order.
He couldn't help but contemplate what was going on, but it was a little hard to think being this close to Danny's presence. The urge to fight against his soothed mind and the urge to just relax were warring, but unfortunately, his latter side was winning.
If Jazz had seemed comforting and like a hug, then Danny was the blanket, fireplace, hot chocolate cup and book on a cool rainy evening. It was like Danny was his missing piece that just sucked out all of the fear, misery, and rage inside of him.
It was almost crazy how Jason didn't want to retaliate against them at all.
"Here you go, Jason." A voice interrupted him and Jason looked up into crystalline eyes before something was pushed into his hands.
Jason looked down at his order and then up again. "Thanks."
Danny smiled. "No problem! You're pretty freaked out, huh?"
Jason shrugged. Then he thought about it and he asked, "Can I leave?"
"Of course you can." Danny said. "Come back anytime. For someone like you, you have the opportunity to come by anytime you want."
Jason nodded wordlessly and then, with his order in hand, he started walking to the door.
For one last time, he turned and met Danny's eyes. Danny smiled cheerfully, his eyes squinted in happiness. He gave a big wave and Jason returned it before he put on his helmet and pushed past the doors into the open air of Gotham's polluted and smoky world.
The rose glasses fell off and the pink sparkles faded away with each blink.
Jason stared dumbfounded at his own state of body and mind, as his siblings and family all screamed into his ear frantically, begging to know where he went and how he was.
Jason could only stare at the gray, listless world around him and wonder if he had imagined everything.
"What the fuck?"
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madaqueue · 4 months ago
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FRANKENSTEIN, THE MONSTER
"all-consuming love." who is consumed, and who is loved? shoko loves by knowing, by exploring, by experimenting. and you will always feed her curiosity. you will always let her consume.
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pairing: surgeon!shoko x f!reader
themes/content: smut. fingering (reader receiving), knives, blood, shoko is such a freak idek. 18+, MDNI (wk: 1.9k)
a/n: so. this one might just be for me. this is weird and sapphic and nasty and is honestly written for me so. enjoy :)
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Shoko must have opioids in her voice. There’s no other explanation for how she seamlessly relaxes you, quieting your shaking muscles and racing thoughts. Every syllable another drip, drip, drip of morphine straight into your veins.
It makes you feel high, sometimes, to be around her. Just to hear her speak, the razor edge to her voice that could slice through your skin with ease (she has), the way her eyes dig into you as though she can see what lies beneath your flesh (she has).
“You ready, baby?” she hums through the cloth mask obscuring her face. It makes you pout - you want to see her, see her pretty lips and smile and the lines that form along her cheeks. But she just chuckles at you. “You know I have to wear this, it’s for your safety.”
“I know,” you huff. You would cross your arms if they weren’t restrained, outstretched to your sides. “Another precaution, for your safety,” she called it, and you, as always, trusted her judgement.
Shoko is so much smarter than you, you see. She would never say such a thing, but she doesn’t have to - she carries herself with an air of intelligence, the clear lines of her mind cutting into those around her. Always direct, because she doesn’t believe in wasting her time nor anybody else’s; always focused on results, regardless of the price it takes to get them; always harsh, because it’s easier than being soft. So yes, you trust her (you’d be an idiot not to).
“Okay, it’s going to sting for a moment, but then it’ll get better.” Her voice sounds like red wine and cherries. You wonder if she’d taste as sweet.
Just as you think you can nearly feel her on your tongue, every nerve in your body fires.
It burns.
It always burns. You always forget, maybe an after-effect of the other medications she gives you, but fuck does it burn. Every cell in your body is captured by the flames of your devotion, smoke filling the caverns between your bones.
And then, it gets better.
The blazing inferno dulls to embers, prickling at your skin. It’s so warm, the cold air hitting your bare skin barely even there anymore.
Is anything there, anymore?
Your head swirls in that sweet familiar way. Everything is hazy, your vision pulsing with each increasingly slow beat of your heart.
Thump.
Thump.
Thump.
It feels good.
Thump.
You giggle.
“Feeling it, darling?” Shoko coos from above you.
“Mmm,” you hum, and you can tell by the sound you’re smiling.
“Good.” And you think she must be smiling, too.
You bet she has her lipstick on under that mask. You wish you could taste it, the chalky thickness pouring down your throat.
“I’m going to get started now, okay?”
Oh, how you love her voice. Sweet like chocolate. Like dark, dark chocolate. Almost bitter, to someone who didn’t know it. Who couldn’t appreciate the way it melts on your tongue.
“Ookaayyy,” you draw out the vowels. They make little shapes in the air. They’re all red.
Shoko loves red.
Her laugh is red.
Like right now. She’s laughing as she takes a seat between your legs.
“Y’so pretty, Sho,” you slur at the sight of her body hovering below you. She’s blurry, you can’t quite focus on her, just like an angel. If you stare too long, you’ll fall into her. You don’t look away.
“Thank you.” There’s a curl of a grin at the end. “Are you ready?”
“Always ready. Anything f’you, baby.” You giggle again.
She rolls her eyes, making you laugh more. You love her. (She loves you).
The sound of metal clanging draws your clouded attention as she rummages through the tray nearby. When she pulls a scalpel from it, you frown.
“You promised no knives today.”
“I know, darling,” she reassures. Drip. Drip. Drip. “I’m just testing your senses to make sure the medicine worked, okay?”
Drip.
Drip.
Drip.
“Okay,” you smile. Just like that, it’s all better. All your worries swept under the blanket of your dedication. All your fears smoothed by the lines around her eyes.
You’d let her burn you alive if she asked. If it would help her learn. If it would make her happy.
Silently, she returns her gaze to her true purpose - your body. Nimble hands uncap the scalpel, the silver reflecting the fluorescent lights overhead. It’s sharp, you know it’s sharp, you have the scars littered across your body to prove it: a few winding around your legs, some along your abdomen, one large one extending up your chest. When she opens you, you’re never quite sure exactly what she’s looking for; you aren’t sure if she knows, either. But nevertheless, she always stitches you back up. She always puts you back together.
And you love the scars. Shoko loves them, too. Sometimes, you find her tracing her fingers over them in the dark. That’s much gentler than the knife.
So yes, you know the scalpel is sharp, sharper than nails or teeth, and you love when hers scrape along your flesh. Sometimes you wish they’d leave scars in the same way.
It’s odd to watch her lower it to your skin - normally, you’re not awake for this part. You wonder if she always uses this much care with you, her pinky resting along your hip, as though she needed stability. Shoko is the most stable person you know, unshakable to her core. An earthquake could rattle the support beams of her mind and her ideals would never collapse. You love that about her, you love that no matter what, she’ll always be the one left standing.
It’s also odd to see how much you bleed. It’s such a small cut - you didn’t know you had so much blood in you. And yet, gauze after gauze comes up red.
Red. All red. Red insides, red outsides. Blood like cherries.
“Did you feel that?”
You try to shake your head before realizing it’s too heavy. “Nooope.”
“Good,” she hums. Heat tickles the inside of your stomach. You like when she says that. You like being good.
The stool swivels as she scrawls in her notebook nearby.
Patient endorses no sensory response to painful stimuli following administration of analgesics, paralytics, and anesthetics.
She changes her gloves smoothly, snapping each one against her wrist as she draws them over her fingers. Warmth floods your cheeks as you remember the way they feel inside you, her flesh and yours, muscles contracting. You love her hands. They’re rough in all the right ways, burned fingertips and chipped nail polish.
With a calculated inhale, she places the scalpel aside.
If you weren’t as close with her, you’d surely feel further embarrassed by the way she moves to focus her gaze between your legs. But you just feel warm, her eyes dripping in adoration mixed with curiosity. It’s good to be useful.
Her eyes flit to meet yours for the briefest moment, fire crackling behind them. “You’re blushing,” she observes. Always so observant, your Shoko. Seeing everything, feeling some things. It helps her process, you think.
“S’for you.”
Her skin feels cold through the latex as she spreads your folds.
“And you’re wet.”
“That’s f’you, too,” you smile.
That makes her smile, you’re sure of it, the pride blooming in her chest and growing up her neck until it reaches her teeth, blossoming through her lips.
She hums in acknowledgement. Maybe that’s why she wears the mask - so you don’t see the red burning her cheeks.
Her shoulders shift, and you can tell she’s moving, even if you don’t feel it as one slender finger slowly enters you. For this part, she keeps her eyes on you.
“You’re sure you don’t feel that?” she prompts, studying your reaction.
“Don’t feel a thing.” And it’s truer than she could know - you barely feel the table beneath you, the rough straps holding you in place, you aren’t even sure if you feel her presence anymore. But you know it’s there, and that’s enough.
“Hmm.” One eyebrow quirks above the other - she’s thinking. You don’t see her insert a second finger into your aching core. You don’t hear a soft wet sound slowly fill the sterile air as she pumps in and out of you. “What about now?”
With as much determination as you can muster in this state, you try to sense what she’s doing, sending exploratory signals down the nerves of your body, only to be met with warm, warm, warm.
Your eyes flutter as you hum a quiet, “Nothin’.”
You look so sweet when you’re on the verge of sleep, but unfortunately, she can’t let you rest. She can’t risk ruining her experiment, after all.
“Come on, darling, stay with me, okay?”
And she lulls you from one bliss to another, the fountain of unconsciousness to the oasis of her voice. You’d drink from her every time.
“M’here,” you mumble.
She chuckles. She loves you. (You love her).
You still can’t see what she’s doing, but you don’t care. You’d let her do anything to you, to your body, and then you’d let her do it again. You’d let her cut you open and rearrange your insides until it fits her idea of perfection, until her curiosity is satisfied, until her name is carved into your skin.
But whatever she’s doing seems to have your body at attention, your muscles growing taut. The beat of your heart is louder.
Thump.
Thump.
Thump thump.
Thump thump.
Thump thump thump thump thump.
“Sho,” you moan, “somthin’s happening.”
“I know, love, it’s okay.”
More saccharine morphine. But this time it doesn’t sedate you - it awakens you.
“Sho.”
With a cry of her name, euphoria floods your body. It’s different than before, different than the fluids flowing into your IV. This is uniquely her in some way - it’s familiar in the way her body is. Hot skin and desperate gasps and red lipstick. It’s flames everywhere. It’s warmth. It’s perfect.
Thump thump.
Thump.
Thump.
The erratic raise and fall of your lungs slows as your mind swirls.
Thump.
And Shoko breathes a sigh of awe.
In a moment, she’s pulling off her gloves, tossing them to the side with her mask. You can’t see it, you can’t see her, you can’t see anything, it’s all blurry. You’re underwater, drowning in red. It feels good in your chest.
Her pen drags along the paper:
Patient successfully achieved orgasm through manual stimulation, in spite of lacking sensory input. Confirmed via palpating internal muscle contractions.
Experiment trial 01 concluded.
Status: Success
And then, her focus returns to you.
Lips press to the inside of your thighs, and you can feel it. You shiver.
“You did so good for me,” she hums into your skin. “I didn’t know if you could, but you did. You amaze me.”
You giggle through your haze. “Love you, baby.”
“I love you too.” Another red-lipstick kiss. “My best research subject.”
And you’re warm. So, so warm.
She slowly releases the restraints on your body, rubbing her fingers into your flesh as sensation returns, tingling flames shooting down each sore limb, calmed only by her touch. She’s your antidote, your life support, your medicine. And good girls always take their medicine.
You let her do anything to your body, because ultimately, it’s hers. You let her cut you up because you know, no matter what, she’ll always be there to put you back together.
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gingerale13 · 1 month ago
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I churned this out so fast excuse the quality.. anyways there's a cheesy ass note to my mutuals + followers under the cut bc I love you guys 🧡🧡
This year kinda whizzed by for me! A lot happened in my personal life that I don't want to share online, but throughout all of the highs and lows I was always able to come back to this wonderful fandom. It's been a huge comfort seeing other people theorize and discuss my favorite characters!
I've meet a lot of awesome people through Tumblr & Ao3, cosplaying, and various TF2 groups. As of writing this post I've got a solid 260 followers, which is an insane number to me when this blog simply started as a place to organize my creative works 😭
All of the little tags and comments on my stuff have seriously kept my life whimsical (for lack of a better term) and I would like to shout-out some notable people and works that kept me going through 2024!
First up, and probably the biggest one, is the lovely @aussie-bookworm and their fic, Going Through The Motions. These updates seriously made my day, and I couldn't have been happier you accepted my offer to proofread. It's been super fun discussing the differences between our countries, yapping about the Mercs, and different AUs. I hope to read many more of your works in 2025 B)
Next, another fanfic author, is AhChunta! If you like slow burns, mystery, and Speeding Bullet, I would really recommend Stolen Pieces. It's a super cool crime boss AU that I've been enjoying this year. Plus it deserves more attention!
Another awesome artist is @800db-cloud, who is honestly CARRYING the Freak Fortress fandom. I love how silly your depictions of those freaks are 🧡 and also YOUR ARTSTYLE IS SO COOL AND SATISFYING TO LOOK AT ARGHHH.. You're just super awesome 👍 also shout-out to @riskreward1, my chillest mutual. I think your Getting Milk comic series is hilarious and amazing, but seeing all of those other fandoms you draw is like a gateway drug to me because it's drawn in your KICKASS artstyle‼️plus you like The Mountain Goats and that's based
@thechocolatearmor!! The other Medic Cosplayer I met at my first con!! My friends still mention the in-character convo we had, you were hilarious and I'm so glad I got your Tumblr because I love reading all of your takes on reblogs. I hope I see you again so we can be insane together again 🔥
also @mikimel, I admire how silly you are 😭 I still have that little doodle you drew at the con, and I wish your Tomodochi Miis well <3 AND THE SOLLY FIGURE. He's beautiful. Your fashion sense is fire, and I hope to see more of your cosplay projects! :0 (specifically Soldier Miku. If that's still a thing hehe)
@ivvyzzspark you. You know what you did.
Another HUGE thanks to my very very patient proofreader @emiette for helping me make Crates readable! Em dashes are my new favorite form of punctuation.
And lastly I would like to thank @mvabank because you were the one who made me start rotting over TF2 in the first place 🫶 Magmas were always so fun with you and the image of your little sona with the big ass eyes is forever seared into my brain <3
Maybe it's because 2025 is divisible by 5, but I have a feeling this year is going to be a good one. Stay safe out there, people! Cheers 🥂
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