#no but sincerely FUCK meta

[herewithinthevoid]

my depression naps are longer than that fuckass ban

[thebibliosphere]

Re-reading Ch28 of Phangs to double-check some details (just as well because I completely fucked up Vlad's room in the next book.) and not to toot my own horn or anything, but it's so fucking funny from an ADHD perspective.

Nathan just walked into a veritable treasure trove of Vlad's psyche.

He's walking around in awe, like, whoa, is that a hand-painted celestial map on the ceiling? Gods, Vlad's so talented. I bet there's nothing he can't do. Oh, a pianoforte! He's musical! Wow, look at all these books. He's so smart. I love how smart he is. I want to fuck his brains out. Oh! Look! A telescope!

As opposed to Vlad, whose internal monologue is: don't look at the mess, don't look at the mess, don't look at the mess. Okay, just act normal. How... how do I do that? Oh gods please don't think I'm weird. Please like me.

I know I wrote him, but he's in such a mood sometimes, lol.

[blindmagdalena]

and ANOTHER thing about sage!!!

'smartest character in the world' is always such a difficult trope to write because the writers can almost never make that pay off in a satisfying way. but it WORKED here. not only did it work phenomenally well from a plot perspective, they made it work so beautifully from a character perspective!

the fact that she's doing this for enrichment! just to prove she can! because for her entire life she's been disrespected and pushed aside and underestimated not only as a supe, but as a black woman? revolutionary. best character in the show. i'm in love.

[psalmsofpsychosis]

Me: yeah no i can cook gutwrenching Batman headcanons

Gotham TV: baby Bruce curls besides Alfred's hospital bed after Alfred gets stabbed in the heart, never leaves his side for one moment to the point that Gordon has to bring him food, he's red faced and hicking up all the time, whispers to Gordon "i can't lose him; he's all i have," and after Alfred comes back to life he brings books from Wayne Manor and softly reads horror bedtime stories to Alfred during the day until Alfred eases down and falls asleep

Me: god nevermind

[kindaorangey]

i haven't gotten there in my rewatch yet so i can't remember how much of an obvious reading this is, but i think daniel choosing to rat armand out at the end isn't as simple as him stirring the pot or needing to chase the journalistic satisfaction - it is both of those things, but there's also a more calculated side to it of him trying to get in louis' good books.

he doesn't believe he's going to make it out of there alive, he doesn't trust louis, but he trusts armand less, and he and louis have a level of mutual respect and emotional connection. he's told, "you fear armand, you should fear the other one," and so he rolls the dice, throws his lot in with louis, unravels armand's lies and hopes it's enough for louis to make sure he lives.

[borgialucrezia]

the borgias truly went off in 2.10 'the confession'. specifically, where devastated rodrigo buries juan with his own hands, being intercut with everyone happy and celebrating lucrezia's betrothal, and being perfectly juxtaposed with dark and light. we get to see how rodrigo always saw juan while carrying his body (and that's probably how he sees all his children) as an innocent little kid instead of a broken soul. which was one of the most touching and well-crafted scenes that have ever aired on tv btw!! the whole sequence is also backed by a moving piece of tragic music that matches how guilty rodrigo feels about making the family hate juan by pressuring his inadequacy, making him full of misguided notions of defending the family's honor that led him to go wild. and setting him up to be envied by cesare. the murder made rodrigo reflect, and the viewers can tell that he has never told his eldest son that he sees himself when he looks at cesare, and that he has always held him in high regard but with a different dream and vision for him, despite cesare's wrong assumption that juan was rodrigo's favorite. and all because he always had a self-loath. to accept cesare as his favorite, he has to accept himself first. plus the cliffhanger? peak cinema imo.

[weaksspot]

and when i talk about sam topping i don’t necessarily mean sam being dominant or domineering or controlling or rough or even in charge. just like when i talk about dean bottoming i don’t necessarily mean being submissive or feminine. because none of those things are required to go together… when i write sam topping i think of him taking care of dean in a way that balances how dean has always taken care of him. physically giving dean love and affection and pleasure and care that he maybe wouldn’t accept in another form. and dean bottoming is like… yielding to sam and being vulnerable for him in a way that is just not normally possible for him. and/or looking at it slightly differently it can be dean taking care of sam too by opening himself up in that way.

and i mean dean just has this gaping void inside of him that needs sam sam sam sam sam sam. he is not complete without sam he cannot function without sam. and i think you can see where i'm going with this void-filling metaphor without me needing to spell it out lol

okay lastly sex is not always about dominance and submission. in fact i'd go so far as to say most healthy normal sex isn't. not that i'm calling sam and dean normal or healthy either but it's not like they're actually engaged in a lifestyle bdsm relationship. and i think for them sex wouldn't be about that as much as it's about closeness and comfort and wanting to crawl inside each other's skin and wanting to know each other and be with each other in every possible way including physically.

so ya i don't think sam tops because he's some meathead fuck machine because he's tall lol. and i don't think dean bottoms because he's a whiny subby bratty omega bitch because he’s pretty. because i don't actually view people like that in the first place. it's sooo much fun thinking about what they would be like with each other sexually because they're so fucked up and not normal and realistically would not have penetrative sex in the first place but if they did... it's less fun reducing either of them to stereotypes lifted out of heterosexual bdsm porn. for me personally

[crustaceousfaggot]

Sometimes I wonder if people played the same game that I did

[larrythefloridaman]

I am not a prismdani guy in the sense that I dont think that could ever have a happy ending even in theory without altering or disrespecting their characters in some essential way and i dont think a fully tragic and fucked up ending for a character like dani with no light at the end of the tunnel really suits cpuk's tone or themes in the grand scheme of things

but i am in the sense that i understand and am compelled by it in like a horror movie way.

In a 'dear god dani get the hell out of there' way.

In a 'hey that scene in orange looked almost like a date before the arm thing, (the most flagrantly horrifying red flag yet at that point and what made most of us fully turn on her after some hesitation about fully condemning her when she gave cobalt a crisis instead of advice and shoved folk and treuse around before the Kicker that was her killing crimson onstage) that, as a flashback, was immediately preceded by Crimson (literally a walking red flag that somethings deeply wrong in Prism's metaphorical house, Noone Really Acts Like That For No Reason,) asking what Prism's been doing and saying and followed within said flashback by Quadratic (Mr. Character Arc Revolves Around Healing From A Relationship With A Character He Goes On To Explicitly Compare Prism To) carefully soft-confronting Prism so as not to make a scene while checking in with Dani to make sure shes okay and to let Prism know he has his eyes on her and isnt afraid to bluntly and unambiguously leak information to the audience she wants to keep secret while theyre on camera so she better not pull any shit' way.

In a 'the butchest girl twitter can handle without getting scared and me, the sunshiney eccentric femme she serves and obeys onesidedly like a dog, her own character subsumed into an aesthetically cute complimentary nonthreatening opposition to mine :) (dani cannot bring herself to admit shes grown afraid of setting her off or disappointing her or disobeying and being made to feel that oppressive crush of obligation as Prism manipulates her, struggling to realize and process the idea that Prism is a threat to her because an Abuser™️ (as per popular cultural portrayal) is supposed to be an obviously evil physically threatening bastard mcbadguy not a 5'0" nothing bible camp counselor that uses pressure, guilt, information control and other such tactics to creep into your thoughts to rewire your behavior to her liking if you don't have the means to reject what she imposes on you.) look at us we share a character flaw we're foils arent we charming :)' kinda way.

[milevenstancyendgame]

To the person who posted about El: "She must be smarter in s5, right? "

She was always smart, mouth breather, you're just too ableist to see it.

[t00muchheart]

You can get through most of the first season of supernatural just thinking john isn’t great but it is what it is and then you get to Something Wicked This Way Comes and see him leaving Dean alone to take care of Sam for days as a child and then letting him think it’s his fault his brother almost died because Dean, a child, wanted to spend some time at the arcade, and then years later John reinforces the idea that it’s Dean’s fault by sending him to finish the job like—

[usercelestial]

✨ venting ✨

[kirby-souljourney-au]

Finally started Ione’s ref sheet!

I’m still trying to figure out how to draw muscular people (I struggle with men specifically, since I use my own body as a reference image, and I am very feminine, and not muscular at all), but… I think I got it?

Eh, idk. He looks fine as hell so far, though.

[waitineedaname]

I have now finished all the svsss extras! ouuguugh this series man

[sirenofthegreenbanks]

i dont think zzs has relationship ocd, but i can see a lot of myself in him. his insecurity regarding what other people (people he cares about) might think and feel of him, this obsessive need to find out the „truth“ and this almost conspiracy-like conviction that there always is a „hidden truth“ beneath. this crippling fear that others might lie to you and you might not be able to see it. this conviction that others lie, even when they do not, because the sincerity of their emotions, their honest expression without traps or fallbacks or holdbacks, is just too unbelievable to not be artificial. this seeing patterns where none might be, and obsessively following clues that might lead nowhere. thats why i prefer the reading that zzs essentially misunderstood both jq and ljx (ch.47 and ch.61 of qi ye respectively), and that for the latter, it signed zzs‘s downwards spiral. if u interpret their last conversation in qi ye as zzs viewing ljx as rejecting him and as all ljx does is trying to save him from himself and understand him, zzs‘s later habits post-tianchuang and how he views some of ljx‘s words from that conversation (ch.20, ch.27) (and the discrepancy as can be seen in ch.76 of qi ye in what zzs believes ljx‘s very last words on this earth were vs what they actually were, which lends strength to this reading as it fits the „theme“), his failure at reading ppl he feels personally a lot towards, even though he technically has all the facts or there might be an easier explanation that is not as abstract as the one he favours, makes a lot of sense. now, i have started a new reread of tyk and im seeing wkx in a somewhat different light. he is incredibly odd and off-putting and even i, who knows the final and should know his character, have a hard time getting a read of him almost all the time during much of their earlier interactions (ch. 6-13). what is wkx doing here? is he lying or does he believe what he says? is this an act or are his thoughts truly this jumpy? how much of his „im an odd ghost im odd“ persona is a persona, how much is a reflection of the truth? that means zzs‘s conviction that wkx is trying to deceive him is not that off-track, and considering that wkx gives me the strong impression that he IS instrumentalizing the one weakness he found zzs, that glib vagrant, to have (being flirted with), and seems to maintain it all the way until he realizes zzs is going to fucking die (ch.29, moment i personally view as wkx‘s breakthrough), im not even faulting zzs for, well, picking up on it. still. you can tell that his thoughts and his explanations are obsessive and self-destructive, that this is less about whether or not wkx is playing him, and more that zzs does not believe he is worthy of love and sincerity (ch.18, first time he actually spells it out). so, i do not think zzs has some type of ocd in that regard; he only needs a heart-to-heart with wkx and then he is „cured“ (ch.65). but i do think his narrative reflects a lot of what it can feel like to live with relationship ocd, to be in the mind of someone who has ocd, and all the convulted and bizarre actions and conclusions such a person is comitting and drawing, because of their twisted worldview

[robotsafari]

if i see one more "oHhHH RiKu IS sUCH AN eDGY drAMA qUEEN" type fucking comment im going to cause the entire space-time continuum to collapse