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hide-in-imagination · 6 months ago

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Hiiii <3 I love your fanfics, okay "love" is a very weak word, I'm literally obsessed with your ff. That's why I want to ask, I've been thinking for a long time about the fact that I'd also like to write a fanfic about Ámbar and Simón, because I'm not okay and in my free time I think about different situations that could have happened between them behind the scenes. I tried to write something, but either it was very short and by that I mean extra short, or I ended up thinking that it was horrible and decided to delete it, so to get to the whole question, how did you start writing fanfics and how do you do it in general that your stories are always soooo perfect? Do you have any advice for people like me who want to start writing? Aaaaanndddd one more time, I really adore your work, please keep doing what you're doing, every time I get a notification that you've released some update both here and on ao3, I'm like a little girl who was allowed by her mom to buy candy, I mean, it always makes my day 1000% better 💞🩷❤️💜

Hi!!! Oh my god, you're so sweet, thank you 🥹🥹 ❤️❤️

I'm so honored that you would ask me for advice. I'll do my best, but, honestly? I'm my number one critic! I don't feel like I have the right to be advising anyone kdsjs. You say my stories are perfect but I don't believe that. I'm constantly frustrated by my lack of ability and depressed when I compare myself to my favorite fanfic authors.

But this leads us to our first lesson: You will always find someone who likes what you do. So don't worry too much about your first fics being too short or not being good enough. They're your first creations! You'll grow from there! And someone will like it. I mean, look at my first drabbles! They were- what? 300 words long? That's very short, but people liked them!

How did I start writing fanfics? I just did. I got an idea and I started writing it just because I thought it was fun. That idea was 'What If'. Hell, the whole concept was in the title, I'm not that creative 😂 And it wasn't supposed to be more than a fun oneshot! But then I thought "What could happen after that?" and I got more fun ideas, and people were asking for more anyway, so I wrote them.

Now. While I don't regret it by any means, because, as I said, you gotta start from somewhere and it was fun at the time... I do wish I had taken more time to think things through. If anyone's ever wondered why I used to write fast and now it takes me months, it's because now I worry about a 100 different things I did not think about when I first started. I usually just wrote the first thing that came to my head. And again, it was fun! People loved it! But, there is sooo much that I learned later. So many things that could've helped me make a better narration. So many things that I wouldn't have to go back to and change years later if I had taken the time to consider them the first time around.

So. For the sake of helping you and any other person who might want some advice, here are some things I would encourage anyone to do or don't do when writing a fanfic.

No matter what anyone tells you, there is nothing wrong with using the verb "Say." "He said, she said, they said"-- It's fine. You don't need to use a different verb every time. Different verbs are a great help when you want to add an specific edge to it. For example, if you say "he spat" the words, that immediately implies he was angry. You could also say "He said angrily" and it would convey the same message, but "growled" or "hissed" or "snapped" add a different image to it. It's all about preference and nothing is right or wrong.

Having said that- Don't ever use the word 'orbs'. Never. Please just say 'eyes' sdkfs.

Don't use the phrase "their tongues battled for dominance" because it's a fanfic meme by this point 😂 (I didn't know this when I started and I wish I had! I'm sure I used it somewhere 😂)

Similar to the whole 'Say' debacle, there's nothing wrong with repeating words if the context calls for it! For example, if it's a hot scene, you can use 'moan' more than once, there's no need to look for 8 different synonyms. (Sorry for the example, it was the first that came to mind skdf)

(Actually, I might have a whole list of Dos and Don'ts specifically for smut scenes, but I won't go into that kjsn)

Try to keep all the five senses in mind: sight, smell, touch, hearing, and taste. This is something I personally struggle with a lot, I forget most of them knsf. This does not mean that you need to mention all of them in every single scene, jesus no, that would be too much 😂 Personally, it just helps me when I want to add more to an scene. I think of what sense I haven't mentioned yet and go with one that fits.

Sometimes less is more! Don't worry if your writing style isn't as detailed or flowery as others you've seen before. Some people thrive describing settings, for example, and they might write 3 full paragraphs about the exact shade of the leaves on the trees and what kind of trees they are and how the sky looked and what the wind tasted like. If that's not you? It's okay! Sometimes, just saying "they were at a park with lots of greenery" it's enough. Hell, you could just say "they were at a park" and let people imagine it! Don't force yourself and just write what makes sense to you <3

It's okay to repeat characters' names! This is also something I wish I knew right away. Don't say "the Italian and the mexican" just say "Matteo and Simón". Same thing with "the brunette" or "the blonde". Those are fine sometimes, but I try not to use them either. "Girl," "boy", "woman," and the like are fine too sometimes.

Play with subtlety and try to make it feel human. AKA: try to avoid the melodrama. I've unknowingly fallen into it before so I know that it's hard. Hell- some people like it! And if you do, by all means, go ahead, I can assure you you'll find readers who love it. But if you want to avoid it, like me, just... try to avoid anything that sounds like it could be on Wattpad?? LJDKSF I don't even know how to explain this😂 The only example I can come up with is that, if someone is sad, they don't need to fall to the floor sobbing. How many people do you know that do that? Reserve any big displays of emotions only for huge emotional blows (Someone died, someone is dying, huge betrayal, someone is or could be sent to jail and it's innocent, apocalypse AU, stuff like that).

Also, try to avoid anyone being 100% right or 100% wrong. Real life isn't like Disney. People usually have reasons why they think or act a certain way. A girl might start acting cold to her boyfriend because she thinks he doesn't love her anymore. The boy might be confused and hurt by this because he does love her. If they talk about it, it would be wrong of the guy to just say "Well, you're wrong, I do love you" and leave it at that. We should focus on why the girl thought that. The girl might be "wrong", but feelings are never wrong; they just are. (And she should've talked to him instead of acting cold, they were both wrong in this scenario. See? No one's 100% right)

Personally, I see scenes in my head as if it were a movie or an episode and I describe in words what I see the actors do. That might help you or it might not-- Everyone is different! For thoughts, I just go with what I imagine they might be feeling based on what I know of the characters. Sometimes I have to reign myself in and not make them too self-aware though 😂 They haven't watched all the youtube videos on human psychology and couple's therapy that I have! 😂

That's another thing that might help you! Especially if you'll be writing romantic stories. I was first introduced to the concept of Couples Therapy because of this duo of therapists. They have some YouTube videos and a Podcast on Spotify if you wanna give it a listen. Recently, I've been watching a looot of Cinema Therapy. I totally recommend them! They're very fun and I always find something I can relate to Simbar bc I'm insane

Of course, I research so much because I don't have any personal experience, but if you do, draw from that! Whoever said that you shouldn't put your own stuff onto the characters is a liar! Simón talking about what he missed about México? I was thinking about what I missed while I was away from my own country. Ámbar not knowing that bowling balls have different weights? Literally happened to me- I wanted the blue one! The important thing is to keep in mind what the character is like and not just force your own beliefs on them. For example, I hate Luna with a burning passion, but I don't make the characters hate her too because I know that's not them. My friend Chiara has asked me multiple times why I haven't just killed Luna off in a fanfic. My answer is always the same: Simón would be so sad!!

You can also draw from experiences your friends told you about, or something that happened to your family, or you can read people's experiences on Reddit-- Anything works!

And since we're on the topic, I think one of the things that have helped me the most is just: Read. If you want to write, you have to read, that's just how it works. It helps you a lot to discover what kind of narration you like, what kind of narration you don't like, what phrases you like, what words you like. You can start analyzing what this specific author does so well that makes you love their stories. You can start realizing "Oh, I was liking this so much until they wrote that, I better not do the same thing." It's not about copying word for word, it's about trying to capture the essence and then shaping it onto your own style. (But C, what's my style? What is a style? I don't know! I don't even know what my own style is but I'm sure I have one. If you have your own brain, you have your own style, it's that simple. Everyone thinks differently after all!)

Lastly, but very important in my opinion, once you've written something: Check your spellings and grammar. There's this cool Chrome extension called "Grammarly" that I always use. I didn't know it when I first started and now it's a life saver!

This is all I can think at the moment. I'm sure there's more advice that could help, and I'm sure I'm not a paragon of wisdom, so, I invite you to google writing tips if you like, or you can search for that tag here on Tumblr too if you want some more profesional insights.

My main message to you is to just enjoy the love you have for these characters and let it inspire you. Fantasizing about your favorite ship is very fun! Let that fun be your guide ❤️

Lots of love, Anon. I hope you have a great week^^

#anon #answered #appreciation #c speaks #c gives advice #I'm seriously getting some impostor syndrome right now bc who the hell am I to advice anyone! skdjnf #I think the most reassuring thing I can say to anyone who is just starting is that I've been doing this for 6 years #and I still don't know what the fuck I'm doing 😂#but I did my best <3 hope this helps

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willowfolksong · 3 years ago

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Heyyyy may I please request a Mikey x female reader oneshot ( they are in an established relationship) Sooo the one shot is about a night out with Toman how it’d be to spend the night out in the busy streets of tokoyo with your gang leader boyfriend and his friends? please include racing through the streets with you on his bike everything else is up to you thanks 😊

birthday ride

- Manjiro Sano "Mikey" x Reader

- SFW; slightly suggestive

a/n: hiiii anon!!! thank you so much for requesting! Don't worry, I got both of your asks but decided to answer on this one. I love Mikey so much and his time with the Toman gang is like the best 🥺❤✨ Makes me soft. always let me know what you think and I hope you enjoy this!!! ❤

Love,

Willow ❄

Requests are open! ❄

At exactly 12:01 a.m, Mikey climbs to your balcony, opens the doors you always forget to lock, and climbs into bed with you.

You wake up when he pokes your nose, and then proceeds to silence your screech with a kiss.

"Happy birthday!" he cheers, and you scramble to sit against the headboard to glare at him, crossing your arms over your chest. Mikey follows the movement, his eyes lingering for a couple of seconds on the swell of your breasts under your shirt, and then snapping back at you, smile growing bigger.

"What are you doing here?" you whisper, covering his head with the blankets.

He chuckles."It's your birthday! What do you mean what am I doing here?"

"It's also 12 a.m and my parents are sleeping on the next room" you argue, and watch him shrug under the covers, only one of his eyes peaking at you.

"So?"

"So you shouldn't be here!"

He whines, slowly uncovering more of his face until you can see his adorable pout in full glory "But I've been here before. Just a couple of nights ago when we fucked over the..."

"I get it!" you hurry to say, covering his mouth with your hand "I get it now"

He tilts his head to the side, his voice coming out muffled between your fingers "Can't a boyfriend want to be the first one to say happy birthday to his girl?"

You can't help but smile at that, your gaze softening and your hand falling to his lap. Mikey's... an unusual kind of boyfriend. He might not be around school that much, and so there's few walks home together and no kisses shared near the lockers. He's also not very good with the whole traditional date concept, and so you don't have romantic stories about dreamy restaurants and walking around the park hand in hand to tell your friends. He's not there to text with you until late at night, and sometimes he doesn't even answers your calls.

(And you really prefer to not know what he's doing at 3 a.m, when he texts you while you're sleeping to say 'Just got back home with Kenchin'.)

Instead you get impromptu calls during the subject you hate the most, and when you look down through the window right next to your desk you find him there, waving at you by the school's entrance, his bike behind him, as if he also didn't technically had to be in class. You have kisses in front of the traffic lights, when your boyfriend forgets danger and turns around to peck you on the lips. He takes you to his favorite fast food restaurant, and you have ice cream under the stars, when it might seem like it's too late for anyone else to eat that kind of treat.

And you also get a boyfriend that knows exactly how to sneak into your room.

"Thank you, Mikey" you tell him, and lean forward to kiss his lips. He tastes like dorayaki, as always "You're very sweet. And I do really appreciate this"

"You do?"

"Yeah, I do"

His face lights up and he claps, beaming at you "Great, because it's time to go!"

"Wait, go where?"

You hear a motorbike start outside your house in that precise moment, as well as the sound of what it seems like a pebble hitting the glass doors. You scramble out of bed and part the curtains to see.

The entire Toman is outside.

You don't know if you should scream or laugh. You decide to chuckle awkwardly, when your eyes find Draken's and he waves at you.

Great.

"What is this? What's happening?" you ask, confused and starting to panick, watching how your boyfriend follows you out of bed and stretches his arms over his head with a yawn.

"We're going for a ride" he casually explains.

You gape, looking back at the street. Draken seems ready to throw another rock at the glass, but stops once he realizes your looking their way. Mitsuya looks incredibly amused by his side.

"Mikey, listen..."

"You should start calling me Manjiro" he cuts you off, and you feel your left eye tremble. "We've been together for six months now, after all"

"Mikey" you say again, trying to rein in your nerves "I don't really know what's happening, but it's definitely not good" the overwhelming roar of another bike startles you, and you jump and push your face against the glass to try and shush them "Please, tell them not to do that! My parents could wake up!"

Mikey complies, sliding the doors open to yell "Don't do that! Someone could wake up!"

You blanche "Don't yell either!"

He ignores you in favor of pecking your lips and smirk at you "I'll be waiting for you outside. Don't take too long"

There's nothing in your closet that says 'I'm sneaking behind my parents back to go motorbike riding with my boyfriend and his gang, past midnight', and so you decide to put on your to do-everything pants and a simple white t-shirt. Draken is the first one to greet you as you slowly close the front door behind you, grimacing once the lock is in place.

"Happy birthday" he tells you, and you smile and hug him tight, amused at how he seems slightly confused for a moment, only to hesitantly return the hug a few seconds later "I'm sorry for all the commotion. Mikey insisted"

"I bet he did" you say, and look behind him to see your boyfriend talking in hushed whispers with Mitsuya.

"Don't worry. We'll try to get you back soon, so you don't get in trouble with your folks"

You snort, because trouble is not the word you would use for the hell you'll be in if your parents find out about your midnight rendezvous. Mikey smirks when you approach him, hoping on his bike and patting the space behind him.

"Happy birthday" Mitsuya tells you, once your arms slide around your boyfriend's back "I bet you must be surprised"

"You can say that, yeah"

"Okay!" Mikey announces cheerfully, and you move even closer to him, as you always do when his bike is about to set off "Let's go!"

You shudder at the thunderous sound of all the bikes starting off at the same time, and as the engine of his own roars to life, Mikey turns around to give you a scorching kiss that leaves you dizzy enough to forget that your parents have to definitely be awake by now.

The wind blows against your back as you rode down the street with the members of the Tokyo Maji Gang, the few people around at that hour quickly diving out of the way and out sight. Pah-chin yells something behind your back, earning the laughs of the rest, and you busy yourself trying to read every sign you encounter in the way, as you leave the residential area behind and enter the shopping district— the neon pink lights and the still busy street a sight to behold.

"How is it?" Mikey asks all of the sudden, over the howling of the wind around you.

"What?"

"Your birthday" he says, and turns to look at you when you reach a red light, and all the Tokyo Manji bikes come to a stop in front of the traffic lights, to the very visible horror of some of the passersby "How is it so far?"

It's exhilarating, the feel of the warm summer Tokyo air whipping around you as you speed down the streets. The city is different under the moon light. There's things to see at night that you won't find during the day, and you know it thanks to them. To Mikey and the gang, showing you the other face of the city. The other face of life.

The one with the chilly air, and the street lights above your head, and the feeling of owning the road. Pure adrenaline in your veins.

You look around, at the members of the gang you used to fear so much, and that now have become your family. At Chifuyu's smiling face, at Mitsuya saying somethin to Hakkai, and to Draken, who nods at you as if there's something only you and him known.

And you suppose there is.

You squeeze Mikey's waist and kiss his neck "It's going great, Mikey. Thank you"

"Yeah?"

"Yeah!"

He laughs, stepping on the accelerator "So I'm the best boyfriend ever, right?"

"You are!"

He takes off before the light can change again, and you close your eyes and scream for dear life, not wanting to see if a car crashes against you or not— the hollering and the amused whistles of the gang fading behind your back.

You fly down the road until the buildings you pass are just a dark grey blur, mixed with the colors of every sign and every open shop. Mikey takes the curves with a finesse only the President of the Manji Gang has, and you can feel the muscles of his abdomen tighten and contract every time he leans his body with the bike.

You reach the river half an hour later, the stars that you couldn't see before making the water shine, like a pristine mirror. You slide off the bike as Mikey shuts it off and puts down the kickstand.

"I love this place" you say, voice only a whisper. There's something magical about the silence that surrounds you, only broken by the cicadas sweet summer song.

"I know" Mikey nods, plopping down on the grass and glancing up at you "You always say that"

You roll your eyes and sit beside him, and only then you notice the box in his lap. It's a small one, wrapped on red bright paper with little hearts on it.

"What's that you have there?" you say, pointing at it. Mikey doesn't looks down, his eyes watching your face intently.

"My gift" he says, and you feel the blush rise to your cheeks when he moves closer to you, shaking the box in his hand "For your birthday"

"I thought the gift was the ride around the city"

Mikey hums, eyeing the box for a moment before placing it on your lap and moving even more close, until his shoulder is touching yours and you can feel his breath ghosting over your neck as he leans towards you.

"Open it"

Your fingers dance over the edges "Did you wrap this yourself?"

"No, Emma did it" he tells you, scratching his chin "I tried, but couldn't do the corners and ended up making a mess. So she offered. Said that way the gift could be from the two of us" he winks at you, smirking "It's my gift still tho"

You smile, and carefully lift away the tape keeping it together, trying all the time to not tear the pretty red paper, and making a mental note to call Emma in the morning.

Inside the box, there's a Toman jacket.

You look at Mikey, then back at the gift, then to him once more. "This is..."

"Your own jacket" he says, smiling at the way your mouth opens in shock "You wanted one, right?"

"But... I thought it was for members only"

"You're my woman" Mikey says, tilting his head to the side, and you rub your thights together at the sound of those words leaving his mouth "You can have a jacket if you want one"

"Are you sure?"

"Let me put it on you" he offers, and you take it out of the box to unfold it, admiring it for a few seconds before you let him slide it over your shoulders. "There you go"

"I... don't know what to say" you whisper, caressing the letters that run down the sleeves. You notice they're silver, instead of gold, a nice touch to make it unique for you.

"I want a kiss" Mikey says in your ear, and you turn your head to the side to crash your lips into his, letting him push you on the grass.

His lips are soft and tender, and he kisses you lazily, as if you're not two teenagers in the middle of the night, making out by the riverbank and risking someone to catch you. You moan when he sucks on your bottom lip and then nips at it with his teeth, and he takes that opportunity to coax your tongue out with his, groaning when you open your eyes to stare hungrily at him.

"Thank you, Manji-kun" you say, and the smile that lights up his face at the sound of his name is more than worth it "This is the best gift ever"

"Really?"

"And now I won't need to steal yours anymore!"

He stops pepering kisses over you neck to look at you, frowning. "What?"

"Yeah" you say, hugging the jacket closer "Because now I have my own"

Two seconds pass.

Then two more.

Mikey clicks his tongue and pulls you up with him, trying to take the jacket away from you "Give it back, I'm going to return it to Mitsuya"

"What? No! It's mine!"

"But that's not fair! I want you to keep using my jacket!"

You swat his hands away, and run towards the bike with him hot on your tail, laughing all the way "Stop! You can't take it from me"

"Mine's better anyway! Give it back now!"

You stop once you reach the motorcycle, and turn to him to place both of your hands on his chest.

"If you let me keep the jacket" you propose, licking your lips and enjoying how his eyes linger on them after "I'll let you do what you've always wanted to do to me here" you pat the bike seat behind you "On the bike"

"Deal"

"Oh..."

Both of Mikey's hands immediately take hold of your hips, bringing you closer to him "Let's do it now"

"Wait! Now?"

"As a birthday gift!"

"But it's my birthday! Not yours!"

That night, both of you return home with the best gifts you could have ever asked for.

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iiruwu · 2 years ago

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give us some harringrove recs bestie!

i gotchu bae!! but be warned, many of these are pretty much just the ones i've read at the top of the list, filtered by most kudos b/c thats just how i find all my fics. so, there's a chance you might've gone through them already. regardless these are some of my faves and have stuck with me for years after reading them. (this was also requested by @roseinthewoods so here you go!)

let us begin:

Under the Covers by ToAStranger -> my all-time fave harringrove fic. this absolutely deserves its popularity and has one of the best characterizations i've ever seen of the entire cast post-s2. not only are billy and steve super fleshed out, but i just adored how steve interacted with jonathon and nancy (who were equally great as far as characterization goes) along with many other characters. but steve rlly shines in this one! this author truly brings the world to life with their writing and makes you feel like you're really watching everyone's lives unfold in an organic, but also bittersweet story :)

dried up, half full by lymricks -> SUCH a good billy characterization. i mean, truly. also one of the best interpretations i've seen of what could have been billy's journey towards becoming a better person. lots of angst and inner turmoil. made me feel like i was truly in billy's shoes and rlly conveyed this sense of just not being able catch a break in any aspect of life throughout the story. im also gonna throw a quote in here that i have had saved for a while just 'cause it was so heartbreakingly good:

we could be heroes (just for one day) by brawls, ToAStranger -> another fic with really good characterization overall. unfortunately this one is unfinished but as im skimming this im remembering that the dynamic between steve and billy for this was just AGHHHH i was frothing at the mouth the whole time. so funny and sweet and very slowww to build up. it was a very realistic take on billy in specific post-s3, but, more than that, i loved the inclusion of almost the entire ensemble throughout this fic. the kids were such rays of light, it rlly made this fic that much better :)

master of puppets, i'm pulling your strings by wearealltalesintheend -> ONE OF MY FAVES!! this fic hooked me on the idea of billy & robin being friends and i was totally obsessed for a little while afterwards. the author wrote the two of them so damn well together in the s3 plotline and i just love how they were snarky as hell but also progressively more friendly and deeply trusting of each other as billy continued to open up. its also refreshing to see harringrove from an outsider perspective, with robin being there to help them connect the dots. (also characterization was an a+ as usual!)

Don't Leave Me (Hanging on the Telephone) by Glitter_Bug -> this is a fic that is a lottt more recent in comparison to the others. i've been reading this since it was about halfway done and i must say - the banter is PHENOMENAL between steve and billy. the dialogue alone hooked me in with how accurate to the 1980s it was with references and had me reading non-stop. the concept of billy being stuck in the upside-down and only able to contact the real world through the phone at steve's house is sooo damn good. it rlly offered a lot of opportunity for fun scenes with them through phone calls. this is also a fic that is actively being updated and is nearing the end soon!

Renegade (Who Had It Made) by moonflowers -> this was a very tender fic about billy's supposed death and included multiple POVs. i found max's POV abt her grief and coming to terms with his death to be such a nice inclusion that added a great touch to the story and also the many journal entries that she found as well!!! this fic felt very human and personal, like it was something not meant for ppl to see - which, considering the concept of max finding billy's journal with notes about steve in it and giving it to steve, makes sense. it was a nice harringrove slowburn overall!

andddd there we go! these are the most memorable ones i've read but there are so so many more harringrove fics out there that are just as good. i found some interesting ones just while skimming the tag alone. hopefully you liked this anon!!! these are very near and dear to my heart :')

#st #stranger things #billy hagrove #steve harrington #harringrove #max mayfield

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nitrodame · 3 years ago

Text

𝔸𝕤𝕔𝕖𝕟𝕥

𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐰𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐓𝐚𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐢 𝐀𝐦𝐚𝐣𝐢𝐤𝐢, 𝐊𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐡, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐪𝐮𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐟𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐤��𝐲 𝐢𝐭'𝐬 𝐚 𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐣𝐨𝐛.

Pairing(s): KING! Tamaki Amajiki x QUEEN! Reader

Genre: Historical Romance

Fic Type: Multi-Chapter

Status: Ongoing

Warning(s): Possible Smut, Descriptions of Violence and Abuse, Brief Mentions of War

Tag(s): Arranged Marriage, Historical AU, Angst/Fluff, Hurt/Comfort

A/N : Sooo this is my first fic for bnha! I got into the fandom a little late but better late than never right? Anyway, I'm really excited about posting this and hope you all enjoy! This is fic can also be found on AO3 , I'll always update ao3 first so be sure to check it out! Thanks!!

Chapter I / II / III / IIII

A loving marriage. Such a pathetic concept. Who really got to spend their life with the one they loved? Such an illusion was nothing more than a child’s broken fairytale. That was something you recited to yourself over and over again as you stared blankly at the man you were going to spend the rest of your miserable life with. Tamaki Amajiki, a distinguished prince from one of three ruling families of your land. A man who did not love you and probably never would. He was to be your life sentence and he couldn’t even meet your eyes. You wondered, somberly, if there was a special person that already occupied his heart as he quietly recited hollow vows that meant nothing to either of you.

How different would his words be if he really did love the woman that was standing before him? How fast would your heart beat if you truly adored the man cradling your hands? It was a bitter thought. A fleeting glimpse of a life you would never have. Your union was born from nothing more than necessity and as his quivering lips pressed stiffly against your own, it was a fact you would never let yourself forget.

You woke up in a bed that was much too large, all alone, yet again. The vacant sheets beside you, that were always cold to the touch, was something you had come to expect. You hugged a lone pillow to your body, burying your face into its softness. Your mind began replaying a familiar fantasy as you tried desperately to ignore the rays of spilling sunshine that forced their way through your silky curtains. You would often imagine the pillow as the warm chest of a lover, they would run their fingers through your messy hair and whisper sweet nothings in your ear after a long, passionate night of love making.

It was the same scenario day after day but it was all you had to stave off the numbing loneliness that renewed itself every sunrise. Just a little longer, that’s all you wanted, just a second longer to pretend you were adoringly desired.

However, your dreams were dashed as your chambermaids filed in, their idle chatter causing you to begrudgingly open your eyes. You fought the urge to tell them to leave so you could continue to indulge in your pity party...but you knew better, after all that was no way for a queen to behave. You sighed internally as they urged you to your feet.

Today was a special day. It was your birthday, the first one you would be celebrating as the new queen who was lucky enough to exist next to Tamaki's side. The whole kingdom was a buzz about your special day, nobles from all over the country would be attending your grand celebration. You couldn’t seem to share their enthusiasm, you were already alone, but what better way for that painful point to be driven home then by meaningless interaction with hordes of faceless strangers who cared nothing for you. You could almost laugh at the absurdity of it all.

You were pulled out of your stupor when you felt nimble fingers gently tugging at the loose threads of your favorite worn nightgown. Ah, you knew who those tiny hands belonged to.

“Good morning Eri.” You hummed sweetly, picking the little girl up with a smile.

“Good morning big sister! Happy birthday!” Eri giggled enthusiastically as your heart swelled with affection. The only blessing about being trapped here was becoming familiar with the little angel that was Eri.

The long days that ate away at you sped up and the world regained its vibrant hue when you were with her. Her innocent smile and childish bright eyes filled you with an indescribable joy that had been missing for as long as you could remember.

She was your everything.

“Thank you sweetie, but anymore of these birthdays and I’ll get all wrinkly.” You chuckled as the small girl cupped your cheeks, her crimson eyes scanning your skin with immense precision.

“I don’t see anything!” She concluded with insistence.

You only placed a soft kiss on her nose in response before your chambermaids began fussing with your garments. You set Eri down amongst your numerous pillows and blankets, she quickly pulled one to her chest.

“Has big brother Tamaki said happy birthday to you yet?” She asked softly, there was a painful squeeze that gripped your tightened chest.

You couldn't tell her.

How COULD you tell her?

Tamaki probably wouldn’t even remember your birthday had it not been a public affair.

“You beat everyone to it Eri, you're so fast that no one can tell me before you!” You grinned playfully, which quickly earned you a shy smile from the little girl.

"I'm really happy everyone is going to be together today!" Eri said after a moment, she seemed so excited you couldn't help but mimic her energy.

"Yes, all our friends from all over will be coming! I'm sure they all can't wait to see you!" You hummed as you did your best to help your maids undress you.

"But it's your birthday!" She countered, falling back against the soft bed, her arms stretched out as she spoke. "They'll be more excited to see you!"

"If I were them, it be you I'd be thrilled to see Eri." You chuckled as you watched her.

Her little face bloomed with an embarrassed but flattered blush, her small hands fiddling with the golden seams of the peachy satin pillow that resided in her arms as she thought about your kind words.

"Oh! Are your parents coming?" Eri asked with curiosity. "I'd really like to meet them!"

You stilled for a moment, the chambermaids froze, their fussing coming to a halt at the seemingly innocent question that poked a wound that was far from closed.

"I'm afraid not dear. There's much more urgent matters they must attend to this evening." You sighed, your tone gentle but the severe pain in your words rippled just beneath your annealed glassy façade.

"But..." Eri's face fell as she sat up, the miniscule shift in your steady voice not going unnoticed by her keen ears. "...It's your birthday."

"Aw, don't worry sweetie! I'm already surrounded by lots of my beloved family." You replied with a chipper tone, reaching out patting her head affectionately. You did your best to conceal the waver leftover in your words. "You're here, aren't you?"

The tension in the room began to dissipate as Eri's dazzling smile crept back onto her little face. A silent wave of relief washed over your maids, it was common knowledge among the castle that they were to never bring up your family...but Eri was a child, she didn't know better and it's was not something you spoke about openly anyway.

You didn't want your sour mood to undermine the little angel's excitement, she was so happy for you.

How could you dampen such enthusiasm?

You both continued your idle chatter as your maids finished their ministrations, it had been quite a while since you'd seen Eri after all. Mirio, her guardian and Tamaki's childhood friend had been away on confidential business for months and he had brought Eri with him.

You had begged the man to let her stay in your care while he was away but ultimately... he refused, he always did. Instead insisting she remain in his sight at all times. You did understand why but that didn't stop an Eri sized hole from forming within your heart. Even now, after your party concluded, she would be whisked away for no doubt months yet again.

And your one happiness would go with her.

A swift but polite knock at your bedroom door called your attention away from your thoughts. You sighed internally, knowing you'd have to continue your conversation with Eri later.

"Yes, come in." You summoned.

Tufts of bright blond hair entered your field of vision. His large ever present smile greeting you as Mirio stepped in, a sizable bouquet of pink peonies in hand.

"I should've known this is the first place you'd be, Eri." Mirio laughed as Eri gave him a bashful look. "She's been talking about seeing you nonstop ever since she heard about your birthday."

"I am equally as excited to see her. There isn't a day that goes by when I don't think about her." You replied sincerely, not missing the look of guilt that crossed Mirio's face.

"Don't worry! I'll be able to come over more soon!" Eri grinned, her eyes darting to her caretaker. "We promised!"

"Is that so?" You questioned, a playful but equally skeptical look dancing across your features as you turned to face the man before you.

"Yea, we'll be returning home shortly after this upcoming week for a while and I've promised Eri that she'll be able to visit you as much as she'd like until we have to leave again." Mirio admitted sheepishly. "But it was supposed to be a surprise, Eri."

"Ah sorry, I forgot." The little girl giggled as she watched an expression of pure joy light up your wide eyes.

You could barely contain yourself as you gathered Eri up in your arms, squeezing her in an almost crushing hug. You found yourself unable to let go, afraid she'd be stolen from you if you dared loosen your grip, even for a moment. Your eyes closed as you held her, the weight of her small form grounding you to the world beneath your feet.

"I couldn't ask for a more amazing surprise." You whispered, burying your face in her soft white hair as she wrapped her small arms around your neck, laughing happily.

Mirio said nothing, choosing instead to watch you with understanding and sad eyes. The immense pain was written all over your body, it always was. From the first time he'd met you to the last time he saw you, he could've sworn you never once smiled at anything other than Eri. Your eyes always seemed distant and empty, filled with resignation and thinly veiled loneliness.

It was hard to witness.

Even more so when he took away the only person that gave you a reason to smile.

…But hopefully this announcement would give you some respite at least for a little while.

"Oh, before I forget-" Mirio started after a moment, offering you the fragrant bouquet with a grin. "Happy birthday Y/N."

"Thank you, Mirio." You said gratefully, a true, genuine smile painted onto your lips as you took the flowers from his outstretched hand. "I'll never forget this."

"I know..." Mirio gave you a gentle nod, his eyes flitting to the girl cradled in your arms protectively.

"..I hate to take Eri from you but we have a couple things to get done before tonight's party." Mirio said tentatively, his voice careful as he relayed the information to you.

"I'm getting a new dress for the party!" Eri squeaked enthusiastically.

"I can't wait to see it darling!" You grinned up at her, tucking a loose strand of stray hair behind her ear before setting her down gently. "I'm sure whatever you choose it'll be beautiful on you!"

"We'll be back as soon as possible." Mirio reassured you, resting a soothing hand on the small of you back. "I promise."

"Thank you Mirio, I really appreciate it." You replied quietly, your gaze still fixed on Eri as she waved to you, heading out with one of your maids to go collect her things.

"I wouldn't have been able to return if it wasn't for Tamaki." The man sighed wistfully. He had promised his best friend he wouldn't say anything but you just had to know, he couldn't keep this from you. "Us being here is all his doing."

"Is it?" You muttered, finally lifting your stare to gaze upon Mirio.

"Yes, he was able to buy us some time with the Commander." He continued after you granted him your full attention. "I honestly have no idea how he did it. He's super amazing, you know."

"Will he be here tonight?" You inquired, moving to set the flowers on your vanity before gesturing for one of your chambermaids to bring a vase.

"He wouldn't miss it." Mirio insisted, watching as you gingerly pulled the peonies from their festive wrapping.

"I'll be sure to speak to him then." You mumbled while you ran your fingers over the soft pink petals, taking in their sweet smell. "It's been a long time since he's been home."

"I know you miss him." Mirio dared to say, his tone light. You paused, staring vacantly at your reflection as your maids hurried out of the room.

"How could I miss a man I don't know?" You huffed, eyes dagger like in appearance as they regarded Mirio with tired annoyance. "I'm surprised he even remembers my birthday."

"He cares about you quite a bit, more than you think he does." The man refuted, not dropping your icy stare.

"Hmm, I'm sure he does, that's why he leaves me here alone for months and never writes." You hissed bitterly before correcting your tone to a more polite one. "Well regardless, he's the reason Eri is here so I do want to make sure to express how thankful I am."

Mirio saw no point in trying to plea his best friend's case, you clearly didn't want to discuss the matter anymore and it's not as if you were completely wrong in your irritation.

Tamaki, though he did try, was never good with his communication and his status dictated him away for long periods of time. Your relationship was strained even before that but the constant distance really seemed to dig at both of you.

Tonight was the first night you'd see each other in over three months and you weren't looking forward to it. Your interactions weren't malicious or cruel but they were sterile and cold, most wouldn't even know you had been sworn to each other for life.

It drained you.

"You should go Mirio, Eri is probably waiting on you." You concluded calmly, breaking the staring match you'd had with the man only moments before. "Thank you again for the flowers, they're beautiful."

"Of course, I'm happy you like them." Mirio finally relented after some time, knowing that there was no use trying to engage you in further conversation. "We'll see you tonight."

He gave you one of his famous signature goofy grins before stepping out, you watched his back as he left, silently wondering if he really would return.

158 notes · View notes

changlix-mp4 · 4 years ago

Text

BANG CHRISTOPHER CHAN ♡ : A TO Z - ( NSFW )

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

well , we all know how caring he is?

he is so dad , caring , like yea daddy ( sorry ksjsk )

ok for real ,

I think he is the type to wait a little bit , to let you both calm down , holding you into his arms

after cleaning you up

he’s gonna be soft with you

treat you right huh

little caresses and all

he is so affectionate , he’s so adorable ,, I want to hug him forever

*crying session is open*

I definitively can see him wanting to cuddle you afterwards

he would lay his head on your chest at first , wanting you to play with his soft curly hair

NATURAL CURLY HAIRED CHAN SUPERIOR , BARE WITH ME

after awhile , he would put your head on his chest and his turn , he would play with your hair

holding you close with his hand on your waist until you both fall asleep

c u t e .

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Well , before I start ,,

Chan said he loves his dimples when he smiles ,, well same

I think Chan’s favourite body part are his dimples and his whole body? I mean I don’t really know, and I can’t really explain , but the fact that he works out and take care of his body ,,

he prob likes his arms aswell ( anyways , I do )

For his partner , he’d prob likes ,, oh no ,, loves your thighs , the skin so soft , smooth ( so sexc sksj ) ,, he loves the fact that they’re not too slim and skinny . He also likes your plump lips , so kissable and soft and your tummy uwu

knowing Chan , I bet this boy loves every parts of your body

I know y’all don’t care , but

I love Chan’s veiny arms , his hands omfg choke me daddy , his cheeks , his hair , his smile omg, well … EVERYTHING ABOUT HIM ! His dimples are my weakness bye.

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

not the greatest taste?

but more liquidy and not sticky gross

so I-

I think it’s fine to swallow it?

he thinks it’s hot when you do this

but he’s not the type to want you to do things that make you uncomfortable

If you don’t want to swallow it , then don’t do it

If you want to , just do it

you’ll just make him moan at the sight before him

he likes loves to cum inside

it’s his fav place

when he doesn’t cum inside you

he would cum on your thighs ( because he loves them asf )

and your stomach too

but not on your face

you both find it gross so it’s a big no no

and it’s more embarrassing than sexy so , NO

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

chan is actually pretty open about his kinks?

he’s a dom ( we all know it jk )

act like he knows what he’s doing

but sometimes it’s not the case

actually there is one thing he’ll probably never admit

he acts like he wants to do all the job

the one who control

but daddy he wants to feel special sometimes

that’s why he f loves when you want to take control

he’d act like he doesn’t want to , but boy inside is burning with excitments & anticipation

I also think chan is the type to use your underwear when he jacks off

the thought of you in them, really turns him on

he’s just a bit ashamed to steal some panties of yours he loves a lot

ohh and he really wants to try fingering you in a public place

like in a restaurant? , library

He’s nervous about bringing it up tho. It’s a thought that he jacks off to sometimes

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

not really experienced.

chris is super hot , well build , really charming , polite and all

let’s just say perfect ( I’m not even exaggerating )

everyone want to get in his pants

but

I’m pretty sure chan is a virgin ,,

I mean , he prob just saw a few porns

my boy is really intelligent so

he just learn very fast skjsl

but yea ,,

and plus , he was a trainee since he was young , 14?

being under jyp had its own restrictions

and I don’t think he needed that and he had time for that

busy man *sigh*

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. will probably include a visual)

I don’t think he is very demanding

chan is someone very simple , understanding , he’s just not complicated

not someone hard to please

so I think ,

he enjoys the traditional one ( lmao ) missionary?

he also enjoys doggy style too

he can pulls on your hair to lift you up and have your back against his chest

in this position he can put his hand on your stomach and your neck to slighty squeeze it

AND

he loves when you ride him

boy gets harder than he was ,, as hard as a rock

is that possible??

this position makes him horny asf

he finds it f hot

he loves the fact that he can see your pretty face making yourself feels good

with this position he can see your face when you orgasm

he can easily kiss your neck , make hickeys

he can holds you and yea ,,

he can do a lot of things with this position ( hell yea )

but like I said chan is a super easy person to please

missionary is his fav one

he actually finds it very confortable for the both of you

very soft in a way and romantic

making love uwu

depends of the situation obv;)

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

Chan is a goofy person

I mean is so giggly most of the time

ma babey!!!

he loves to tease , oh yea he does

he can be the type to laugh during sex , if you make a joke ( yea why not lmao )

if you’re uncomfortable , he’d try to make you feel better

so he’d try to make jokes ,if his first option of consolling you doesn’t work

if you guys feel like laughing , you’ll do

looking into your eyes and smiling at each other

c u t e

ngl he can get pretty serious

again , it depends of the mood

when he’s frustrated , angry , tired..

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

I’m pretty sure

he is not bare down there ,,

veeeryy well groomed

doesn’t shave it all off, simply trims, all nice and neat

the amount of hair isn’t too crazy

armpits shaved , he feels more confortable and clean

guys , this boy armpits is cleaner than my whole face tf

happy trail shaved since

TOO MUCH TUMMY FLASHES

but wants to keep his happy trail ,, maybe??

ughhh I want him to keep it bcs damn this is so hot

please hear me out daddy chris

i want to suck hug him

but honestly I feel like

he can go natural when he has the choice?

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

he is so caring

so very romantic

he is a passionate man and he shows it through many ways

we all know it

ahhh I love this man sfm

but sometimes he can be rough

not too much but it depends of his mood

I mean he is daddy so sometimes he feels like he have to show his daddyness lmao i just cringed help me ughhh

he feels like he have to show his dominance sometimes

but when I say rough

it’s not something really wild x)

even when he’s rough

he controls himself

and make sure to check if you’re alright

tbh rough sex happends very very very rarely

but it makes it more special ,, x)

he cares a lot about you

i think he’s more into vanilla sex

yeaa I’m sure he is sooo into it

I mean c u t e

I mean I want him to make love to me!! lord forgive me

he is naturally sweet and adorable so

lord I’m so in love with this man <3

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

he doesn’t do it often

only when he really is alone

especially if you are not around

when he’s really frustrated he also tends to jack off

and one of the reasons why he doesn’t really masturbate

it’s just because he’s constantly around the boys

and my boy is a really hardworking man

well , like I said before he doesn’t do it often

probably once or twice a week? Or not at all the week

it’s when he really needs some reliefs

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

chris is kinky , PERIOD .

y’all can’t deny it

• daddy kink for sure , no doubt ahah

he said it himself sooooo

he’s daddy material tho lmao

he gets turn on when he is being called daddy sometimes

if you call him daddy in public he will get a light boner for sure

guess what will happen next;)

BUT it’s not a need !

he doesn’t want to be called that every time you guys have sex

•maybe roleplay

teacher x student / doctor x patient or stuff like that ( I think he can prob play both, that boy is a switch )

I think he’s definitively not into hardcore bondage ( sorry ) but doesn’t mind to blindfold you

•edging : giving and receiving

he loves the way he can make you whine and scream when he’s overstimulating you

BUT that is only for pleasure and not for torture

•praise kink: giving and receiving

he thinks it’s somehow important

•biting kink : both giving and receiving

he likes feeling you bite down on his skin when he fucks you

he also loves it when you moan out for him as he nips at your skin

thinks hickeys are sexy ( and tf yes they are )

•so marking kink: giving and receiving ,,

it makes him horny when you give him hickeys out of nowhere

and he loves it when you do it while he makes love to you

but most of time he is the one giving them to you

loves leaving hickeys and little bruises on your hips , neck , collarbones , stomach and thighs ( your whole body should be decorated by his soft lips skjsk )

having hickies and love bites on his neck and collarbones

he loves his back being scratched

likes seeing the scraches on his back in the mirror

oh my gosh imagine what it looks like when he takes a shower ,, the water cascading over the red marks omg help me I’m-

since I think he likes thighs ( idk why but yea)

•THIGH RIDING is a big YES

his muscular thighs!!

he likes it when you wear strockings // it’s so fucking hot

•impreg kink tho it’s so sexy and cute damn <3

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

chan is not picky , he’s a simple guy

the bedroom is perfect

why? because it’s confortable

AND secure , intimate

it’s somehow warm and all

but the rest of the house is ok tho

kitchen ( but very rarely bcs you guys feel like it’s not very hygienic but it happens only when one of you are reaaaaaaaaaaaaaally horny and impatient)

living room : couch , carpet ,, shower sex is one of his fav

bath sex with chan is a concept

he’s not into public places

he wants thing to be confortable and intimate ,, that’s why he prefers doing it at home

Or maybe omg

s t u d i o

one of his fav for sure!!

he loves having sex with you in his studio ,, hot

having you riding him slowly

or cockwarming while he’s working ( arg stop me )

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

kisses by his ears and down his neck

his ears seem to be really sensitive hehe

he really likes when you trace his veins with your fingertips ( it also turns you on , ugh it’s like i’m talking about me *moan * )

seeing you in his clothes really turns him on aswell

when you stroke his hair , like when you’re sitting on his lap and run your fingers through it , pulling at the strands a little ( goosebumps kskjs)

but ngl he can get turn on by you whatever you do lmaao

just smile , just breath , boy is turn on ( jk .. unless ahah)

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

anything that involves bodily matter or fluids that are not sperm or vaginal fluid

he does not like degradation , it’s a big NO !

He would never ever degrade you! He likes and respect his girl too much to talk down to her ,, chan is a gentleman . He expects you to treat him the same btw

AH!! sharing you sexually . Don’t even think about it

things like threesomes and all, aren’t his thing

anything that involves violence too

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

he f loves it when you go down on him kissing him from his neck all along his collarbones , abs ,, running your hands on his torso

it pleases him to hit the back of your throat ,, but stay careful to not hurt you

he loves the sight of you inbetween his legs

he likes threading his fingers through your hair ,, pulling at it a little

but my man chan is one of the few blessings on this planet

he equally loves both : giving and receiving

he likes pleasuring you ,, looking at you from between your legs seeing you rolling your eyes in the back of your head , throwing your head back

seeing the way your eyesbrows frown , biting you lips

seeing how you clunch at the sheets , and pulling at his hair ,,making him moans at the sensation and at how sexy you look like

oof this is so sexy I want to disapear helpsk

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? Etc.)

he can be rough y’know not really hard and fast but yea it depends of his mood

he is the one controlling the pace

even when you ride him , he’d place his hands on your waist/ hips to guild you

but I think he’s more into sensual things

he’d be slow and sensual

really slow when he wants to tease the sh^t out of you

he’d be gentle obv

y’know into vanilla sex

Idk why people think he seems to be into really rough things but I DON’T THINK it’s actually the case

my babie is so soft behind all those muscles uwuuuu

Q= Quickie ( Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex and how often? )

No, quickies mainly have to be done in a risky area and that freaks him out so no

plus he hates feeling rushed.

he’s not the biggest fan but he def. won’t turn you down if you suggest it

he won’t push you away for sure

He finds it kinda hot because it mainly means you are needy for him.

Would rather have proper sex. He likes taking his time so quickies aren’t ideal.

On the very unlikely occasion he’d go for a quickie it would definitely have to be in a place he would never get caught

R= Risk (Are they game to experiment? Do they take risks?)

He is not that risky, he wouldn’t do anything to hurt you or to get caught in a sexual act

He has his own boundaries

He is prob open to try new things

he just needs to be convinced first but mainly just to tease you. He wants you to give him reasons

ngl i think he doesn’t know a lot of different kinks and stuffs so he is probably quite open for experimenting ,, curious boy

As long as none of them involve pure pain and violence he’s good.

S= Stamina (How many rounds can they go for? How long do they last?)

I don’t think I really need to write something for this one? He has a good stamina and can last a long time. I think he starts really slow at the beginning and then uses more force and speed after a while .

SO all night bcs of his crazy stamina , I mean he is pretty athletic so , but again DEPENDS of the day and mood

making love all night , taking his sweet time my fucking heart is beating so fast omgg

doesn’t get tired easily i think ; I mean boy can’t even fall asleep irl

BUT don’t get me wrong he can go for rounds but makes time to appreciate your presence and enjoy having conversations with you , y’know?

So prob tried to not go too crazy bcs he wants to spend time with you afterwards get me

If i have to say the numbers of rounds i’d say 3-5 rounds max . Again , it would depends on his mood and pace

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

Definitely NOT a toy user

he’s not into it at all

a vibrator is what he will use ONLY if you ask him to ( I think you must really insist if you want it )

he def prefers tease you with his fingers , cock but not objects

it’s skin against skin for him ,bye.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

lmao we all know he is a fcking tease

sometimes , I think it comes to him naturally and it’s apart of his personality

he finds it so cute when you’re frustrated ,blushing and super shy ahah ( my body is burning just thinking about him teasing skjls)

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

L O U D.

I mean , please listen to 3RACHA songs , he’s pratically moaning ( that’s so sexy tho *moan*)

deep , or high pitched ( lord help me ) soft grunts

moans , groans , breathy moan ( does not scream that’s it )

please just imagine when he’s getting close and makes those sounds

( i’m the one horny rn , brb imma fix my problem lmao )

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

he loves to hold your hand while you two are having sex ( uwu I’m so in love )

enjoys strip teases. Whether it’s giving or receiving ( lord , imagine him getting rid of his clothes slowly and looking straight into your eyes , biting his lips .. I’M NOT OKAY!!)

loves it when you hold his head while he gives you oral , pulling at his locks

fucking loves buying cute and sexy ( not vulgar ones) lingerie sets for you

not necessarily for sex , he just loves admiring the way you look in black or red lingeries ( or even pastel colors )

he just lives for the moments when you dress up for him , only for him

like knowing he’s the only one who sees

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

long and thick. veiny

6-7 inches

( please i just took a ruler to look at the length , the way i moaned i’m-)

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

normal?, average. 1-3 times a week

but he doesn’t need to have sex every week to stay satisfied

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

depends on how long you two were having sex

of course after a proper after care.

but would rather hold you for a moment , talking with you , making you laugh and smile. It means a lot for him , want to enjoy the warmth of your bodies against each other.

c u d d l e to sleep. uwu cute

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A/N : sorry I wrote a lot , it wasn’t supposed to be this long 😭 // FEEDBACKS ARE VERY WELCOMED ♡ taglist :@justamessofablog @mermaidshmari || since you guys asked to be tagged here you are lovelies 💕🥺 ||

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bunnyywritings · 4 years ago

Text

a shy, goth s/o who goes by they/them pronouns

requested by anon; HIII!! I recently started watching soul eater and i finallyyy found someone who writes for them so im reallllly exited!! So i wanted to request something!! Can you do like how Crona, Kid, Soul and Stein would be like in a relationship with a shy goth s/o who uses they/tem prounons (sometimes she). Also when they talk about the things they like they get superrr extroverted and could talk for hourss about it! Also would it heart to ask if you could make cronas a lil longer, they are my comfort character🤧Also wanted to ask if you did emergency requests! If you dont that’s totally fine!!

[a/n: thank you for this request, my lovely anon! It gave me the way to get back into a writing flow again. I quite enjoyed writing for these characters since I don’t get very many Soul Eater requests, as for emergency requests...go ahead and send them in but I apologize if I don’t get it done quickly, seeing as I’m not quite that active on here like I was before. for now, enjoy! - yours truly, bunnyy -`ღ´-]

- truthfully, i think he'd be a little confused at first

- about the whole pronouns thing

- despite being friends with Crona

- so, he'd approach Maka, Crona, and Subaki about it

- he'd be a little embarrassed because he mistakenly exposed his HUGE crush on you

- Subaki coos at him and thinks it's sweet

- Crona is glad to help, knowing that using they/them pronouns is still a foreign concept for some people

- Maka would definitely tease him but ultimately, she's glad he had asked for help

- after realizing that it was a rather simple concept to understand

- he'd get SOOO cocky

- he absolutely loves your style

- obviously thinks you're the coolest person to ever exist

- now the only thing in his way??

- your shyness

- he's only interacted with you a few times but because he tends to be a bit abrasive, you usually keep your distance

- the few times that Stein had called on you in class to answer a question was the most he's really heard you talk

- you were good friends with Kid though

- so you ended up hanging out with the group a lot

- he's seen how passionate you could get whilst talking about your hobbies or about things you liked to Kid or Liz

and Patty

- it made him a gajillion times more attracted to you

- after FINALLY gaining the courage to ask you out (you can thank Black Star for telling him that it wasn't cool to be such

a wimp)

- he'd be on cloud nine

- being in a relationship with Soul would be fun

- he'd be a little awkward at first but he'd soon ease into it

- he's really good at respecting your pronouns

- in the case that he slips up, which i don't really think he would, but if he does he'd feel absolutely terrible

- like he'd beat himself up so hard

- he would do anything to make it up to you

- 100% would cook you a super nice dinner as an apology

- if anybody ever made fun of your style or your pronouns, it's over for that person

- they'd have, not only Soul and Maka on their ass, but they'd have Black Star and Tsubaki, AND the literal son of the grim

reaper and his twin pistols

- overall, Soul would be such a sweetheart

- you make him so, so soft

- gosh i love him so much

- okay

- Kid is definitely somebody who would be up front with his feelings

- he knows about your use of different pronouns and he really admires your bravery to be so open about it

- i feel like he's definitely thought about going by he/they pronouns

- thinks it's absolutely adorable how shy you are

- despite being shy and closed off, he never overlooked you like some students or other staff

- he knows how clever you are

- don't even get me started on your style

- he love love loves your goth style

- especially when you wear anything with skulls on it

- when it comes to his feelings, Liz gets fed up with how ridiculous he's being

- she's watched him break down crying because the stripes on his head aren't symmetrical and someone as precious as you

would think he's trash

- which obviously isn't true

- he sees you out on the balcony, sat on the ledge and book in hand

- he's noticed you with it a lot but it's only the 1st book of a series

- he figures that maybe you just haven't had the chance to find the rest of them

- after some research, he finds that the series had been completed but because of the lack of readers, it was put out of

production and copies were pulled out of libraries and bookstores

- but alas, he had found one of the only complete series in existence in somewhat excellent condition

- it was quite expensive but that was really no problem

- he had wrapped up the set and had gifted them to you with a note and as you read the note, your cheeks burned

- he confessed his feelings

- the next day, you had approached him and thanked him for the gift as well as confessing your own feelings for him

- he thought the stuttering and flushed cheeks was adorable

- 100% the power couple at the DWMA

- sorry i don't make the rules

- Liz and Patty are definitely in love with you, especially with how versatile your fashion is

- Patty has definitely volunteered to paint your nails before

- MATCHING RINGS

- Kid definitely gets you a et of skull rings, just like his

- will go beast mode on anyone who makes fun of your style and/or use of pronouns

he's be such a gentleman and he practically worships the ground you walk on

- as he should

- Stein would be quite used to the use of they/them pronouns since he has students who go by them

- when there's word of a new teacher at DWMA who goes by they/them, he's quite intrigued

- so much so that he would volunteer to show you around the enormous school

- 10/10 falls in love with you instantly

- your shy demeanor is such a contrast to your style

- definitely lives for teasing you

- anything to make you stutter

- but he'd be very blunt about his feelings

- he makes sure that you're being respected by students and staff alike

- threatens anybody who doesn't

- he gets you some screw earrings or a necklace (if you don't have piercings)

- it's his way of making sure people know that you're his

- Stein would be an excellent significant other

- he's a bit more on the playful side so just always be prepared for cheeky remarks

- he doesn't mind your shyness at all

- since he doesn't really favor going out too much so most of your dates are in doors, his place or yours

- probably with a cup of coffee and a book

- he can be sweet when he wants to

- isn't really into pda but i wouldn't be too surprised if he had a moment of spontaneity and pull you into his arms and

kiss you passionately

- some students think it's romantic and others definitely tease the both of you

- since your social battery probably runs out pretty quick, he loves that it gives him an out from tiring staff get

togethers

- Death Scythe thinks it's absolutely HYSTERICAL to make fun of Stein's moments of softness

- but ultimately, he thinks the way Stein looks at you is sweet and makes him happy that his friend has found someone like

you

- cause you're the best

- duh

- his wardrobe has infinitely improved since the both of you got together

- all thanks to you

- overall 15/10 a good significant other

- ahh Crona, sweet sweet Crona

- they're the freaking cutest

- now i know that in the anime and manga, it's written that he uses he/him pronouns but it seem like on tumblr everyone has

just settled on using they/them instead because of Crona's androgynous style and frankly it's a bit of an unclear area

- so uhhh yeah, let's get started

- Crona would have trouble admitting that they had feelings for you, so they tries to hide it but alas, Maka had caught on

- it took Soul a bit longer to realize but he eventually did

- the group had caught on and thought it was adorable

- all of them had tried to help in any way they could

- but Crona just couldn't muster up the courage to tell you

- the both of you were quite shy so it was nearly impossible to get some type of interaction between the two of you

- Crona also really loved your style

- the both of you were similar in so many ways

- Black Star had actually been the one to let it slip that Crona had harbored some kind of affection for you

- Tsubaki had smacked him upside the head and chastised him since it wasn't his place to say anything

- but now that it was out in the open, it had given you the slight confidence boost you needed to confess

- but when you did, Crona just stood frozen, almost mortified by your words

- you took it as rejection and ran off into the woods surrounding the school campus

- Ragnarok had then made an appearance and started tugging at Crona's cheeks and telling them that they should go after you

- but of course, they hadn't

- instead, turning to Maka and Tsubaki for help

- the two had taken it upon themselves to look for you and clear up any misunderstandings

- the next day, Crona had approached you and apologized

- even though they're words were stuttered, you appreciated the gesture and asked Crona on a proper date

- they accepted before panicking because it had dawned on them that they had never been on a date before

- overall, Crona is such a sweet partner

- sure, a bit unexperienced but sweet nonetheless

- they try their best

- both of you have similar styles and everyone thinks the both of you are just the most adorable couple on campus

- Crona loved hearing you talk about the things you loved

- your eyes would sparkle and you'd move your hands so animatedly

- it's almost like you're a different person in that moment

- they just adored you

- they'd get upset if someone had disrespected your pronouns

- Ragnorak would definitely rage if someone disrespected you

- as much as he hated to admit it, he really really liked you

- mainly because you always carried sweets around for him

- ugh I just love Crona

#soul eater #soul eater x reader #soul eater evans x reader #death the kid x reader #professor stein x reader #crona gorgon x reader #crona x reader #x gn!reader #anon request #lovely anon #anon ask

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jyushi-thoughts · 3 years ago

Note

I really like the pony-matsus you drew!! Especially how they're all blank flanks cuz their neets it fits so well! Though, what do you think their cutiemarks would look like?

haha thank you!

honestly i never even watched much of mlp but i know that their cutiemarks are associated with their talent, or what their job is. sooo what are the matsus GOOD at anyway?

THIS GETS VERY LONG. CHARACTER ANALYSIS IS FUN.

Like, the obvious thing for Jyushi would be baseball, but he just LIKES baseball he isn’t good at it. He doesn’t even know the rules! He just likes the exciting parts like running the bases and screaming HOME RUUUN even if he hasn’t actually hit one. Thats why I love the silly doofus.

I could say his talent is cheering people up but is that a good thing? He kinda does that to his own detriment, like when Oso kicked him but he was like “HAHA IM FIIIINE HAPPY HAPPY!” Or when he let his selfishness get the better of him with little Eitarou’s girlfriend. Though talents can be self defeating in real life too.. tho i dont think the actual mlp show would ever go that deep with it lol. the concept of destiny in kids media is kinda messed up when you think about it too hard right? but im getting off track.

I think his mark would be a sunflower with a goofy smile. His talent is sharing his energy with others. :D

Choro’s talent i know for SURE right away. He’s a good planner. He doesn’t follow through on them, but if making plans was his ONLY job he’d be good at it! So his mark will be a quill pen with a checkmark. a very worriedly drawn checkmark...

Ichi’s cutiemark is his fragile heart. HA you thought it’d be something with the cats right? But it’s not like he even takes the cats home he just hangs out with them cuz he’s scared of people. I think Ichi would be one of those ponies who’s got more of a nebulous concept for a talent that could mean a lot of things. Most people wouldn’t say being sensitive is a good thing, but it can be right? I think it is. Ichi would probably resent it though.

Oso I legit can’t think of anything right away BUT I’ve thought of the perfect pony NAME for him!!! Osoi = slow, matsu = pine... His name in equestria would be Pokey Pine!!! cmon it’s adorable it sounds like pinky pie. I think his talent is being a good big brother even tho he’s a dumbass. It should suit their personality too so I’ll make it a deck of cards. His whole sense of self is based on being one of the pack. (plus gambling influenced it)

Karamatsu's would be pretty straight forward honestly. Something about sewing. It’s implied he MAKES all that “perfecto fashion” he wears and he’s clearly good at it. If he had the drive to DO anything with it that’s a pretty decent talent right there! Not much introspection to do about this guy really, he’s pretty uh... fake on the surface on purpose lol. I wanna see more of the REAL him. (The fandom tends to characterize him as being super depressed secretly and I dont really see that... was exclusivematsu this season the REAL kara? is his motive deep down just to be pissed off at everybody? who knows man i didnt get a lot of the choices made in s3 but im ranting again)

poor Totty gets so misunderstood in the way the fandom characterizes him as some unfeeling devil like how the brothers tease him. he IS a cruel little prick but its barely more than the others lets be real. I think Totty is the most clever of the group and has a sweet heart deep down. He’d get a personality based one like Ichimatsu. A candy heart wrapped in plastic.

I also wanna explain the one I gave Homura too! She’s always associated with the ocean, whether it’s a tragic moment or the silly dolphin thing. But I feel like she’d get her mark RIGHT after saving Jyushi and he makes her laugh with the water trick. (While he’s still passed out too so he never realizes she got it because of him. it’s sweet) It’s supposed to mean like, there’s always sunshine after the storm, that kinda thing.

YAY PONIES. lmao again I was never even a huge mlp fan I just went wild with ponies lately! Analyzing characters in this stupid show is a lot of fun. You get to really take liberties with the loose canon!

#osomatsu san #mlp

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bonjour-rainycity · 4 years ago

Text

Double Heart | Chapter Twenty ~ Haldir

|previous part|

Pairing: Haldir x OFC

Rating: PG-13

Word count: 1650

Warnings: None

A/n Hi! Sorry, I know I’m a day late -- I have family in town so I’m soaking up all the time with them that I can. This one is short (and a lil fluffy/angsty), and this chapter and the next are kind of a rest before we hit the next act of this story! Sooo gear up! I’m excited!!!

I shut the door behind Orophin and Lavandil.

Cosima flops onto her bed, staring at the ceiling. “That was awful.”

I make a noise of general agreement. I hadn’t expected my brothers to take the news happily, but I didn’t think Rumil would completely shut me out. I have no doubts that he will eventually come around, but his reaction is still distressing.

Cosima raises up on her forearms, looking at me in concern. “Are you okay?”

I nod, making my way towards her bed. “It may take some time, but I know my brothers. All will be well.”

She scoots from the middle to the far side of her bed and pats the space next to her. I accept the invitation, lying on my back at her side. Vaguely, I notice that her bed is much larger and comfier than mine. I turn to tease her about it, try and cheer us both up, but she’s fiddling with her fingers. I guess neither of us is feeling particularly lighthearted at the moment.

“What is it?”

She sighs, staring up at the ceiling rather than at me. I nudge her arm gently, trying to prompt an answer.

She bites her lip. “You’ve said that you can make your own choices, and I get that, but I’ve got to ask—are you sure? You don’t have to stay with me just because you said you wanted to. I know what you’re sacrificing, and you don’t have to—”

I cut her off, kissing her forcefully. She sucks in a breath and I use that to my advantage, drawing her deeper into the kiss. She recovers from her shock quickly though, and slides a hand up my chest in that way I adore and is slowly becoming familiar. I pull away but keep a firm hold on the side of her face. “Please push these thoughts from your mind. Whatever the future holds, I am in it with you. And a future without you? I don’t want it. It would be different, had I never met you, but the Valar blessed me. They brought an impossible woman into my life. And I have no intention of letting her go.”

The sadness in her eyes breaks, replaced with a look of tenderness that I work hard to memorize. I let the hand on the side of her face slide to rest on her hip.

She places a kiss on my jaw, taking her time to respond, aware that she has my complete attention. “If I had to wake up in a different world with no memories, I am immensely glad you were there. Being with you is worth all that I’ve left behind. Even if I did remember it, I would choose you.”

I exhale slowly, basking in her words. I’ve never been vulnerable with someone before — bearing my heart and hoping they don’t crush it — and every time I open my mouth to confess something to Cosima, there’s the fear that she will shut me down, that she won’t return my feelings. But her words just now, as well as her actions from the past few days, help allay my fears.

“It’s getting late,” she breathes, face mere inches from mine. “You could stay the night?”

My hand on her hip tenses. No, I remind myself. I should go back to my room. But the words that come out of my mouth are not what I told myself to say. “I would not be intruding?”

“No,” Cosima smiles, wrapping her arms around my neck. “I would very much like it if you stayed.”

We are both adults. If she wants me to stay and I want me to stay, then there’s no reason to leave. “Then stay, I shall,” I murmur, dropping my lips to press against hers.

She kisses me languidly for a while before her lips shift into a grin. I pull back with a raised eyebrow.

“You’re the one who has to get up and blow out the candles,” she declares, her tone full of mirth. “That’s really the only reason I asked you to stay.”

I snort, but push myself off the bed, headed for the first candle I see. “I knew it couldn’t be because you love me. That’s too easy.”

“And pull the curtains,” she adds, lifting the duvet so she can crawl underneath it. I watch her slide her eyes shut, smile still spread over her face as she tries not to laugh.

Cosima and I have slept in each other’s company before, and we will do so again for the three weeks of our journey to Lothlórien. But I can’t shake the feeling that this is completely different. It will be the two of us alone, in a bedroom, when we have acknowledged our feelings for each other.

But despite the nerves and the gravity of the situation, it feels completely natural to spend the night with Cosima. I long for her presence during the day, and the night is no different.

And with precious little time together, shouldn’t I seize on every moment?

I blow out the candle nearest to me. It darkens the shadows in the room. I extinguish the remaining candles, close the curtains, and then return to the bed. Cosima has thrown the covers back on what I suppose is my side, making it easy for me to climb in next to her. After the slightest moment of hesitation, I do so. I reach for her, wrap my arms around her and cross them over her stomach, then pull her against my chest. It reminds me of a variation on what I did our very first day of training, an action that caused me no small amount of distress. But now it seems there is no limit to the ways I can hold her, and I plan to explore them all.

Cosima chuckles, evidently pleased with this development. “You remembered the human way.”

“I am capable of adapting,” I respond, dropping my face into her neck.

Her laugh turns into a sigh when I begin a trail of kisses there. “I have a question.”

I hum, continuing my pattern. “Yes, my love?”

She pauses to beam at the phrase. When she speaks, the smile is still in her voice. “Rumil asked if we had bonded yet, and then when you said no, he said there’s still ‘time’. What did he mean by that?”

My lips freeze against her neck. I sigh, shifting to lie on my side and pressing on her shoulder so she’ll turn to face me. I figured we would need to have this conversation at some point, but I hadn’t counted on now. And it’s not the potential for awkwardness that makes me wish I could keep my mouth shut — no, we could get past that — it’s the fear that, once she knows there’s still technically a step we have to take in order for my soul to perish once hers leaves me, that she will end this.

But it is not right to withhold information from her so, with another deep breath, I explain. “He was talking about the bonding of the fæs — in the literal sense. But I love you, I am committed to you, and nothing can change that, so Rumil’s whole notion of ‘time’ doesn’t really apply here.”

Her eyes narrow as she zeroes in on exactly what I’m careening around. “Say there’s some wiggle room.”

“There’s not.”

“But if there were,” she presses, obviously not interested in letting this go.

I sigh. “Traditionally, elves have used sex as a way to facilitate the spiritual bonding of the fæs. That’s what constitutes an elven wedding — that’s what represents and solidifies the commitment. Since we have not had sex, Rumil thinks our fæs are not bonded, so there is time to break the commitment between us without it affecting me.”

She sits up, opening her mouth to comment.

I hurry to sit up as well and cut off her words before she can take this idea and run with it. “But our situation is different. The whole concept of the fæs bonding is not a blanket statement that covers every relationship — there is a lot of choice involved, we are not without agency. And I have chosen.”

She smiles somewhat sadly, letting her fingers drum over my knee. “I wish I was an easier choice.”

I catch her hand in mine. “I quite like where my choices have led me.”

She leans against me, pressing a gentle kiss to my lips. “I love you.” She shifts, lying down and tugging on my arm to pull me with her. “Let’s go to bed. It’s been a long day.”

I stretch out behind her, then twist the strands of her hair through my fingers. She’s silent, and I worry that, despite my efforts to reassure her, she’s still sad. I know she can’t help it, but I wish that we could leave all this struggle and moroseness behind. In my view, the future is set, my path is clear. Struggling over what that means will not halt the end, nor change it, so we shouldn’t waste time worrying over it. We should prepare how we can and then enjoy our lives together.

Cosima tucks her head into my neck and tangles one of her legs through mine. The action — so unexpected yet so natural — gives me hope that, soon, she and I can fall into a life together. Maybe Lothlórien is the key. Maybe once she can clearly see what our future looks like — a home, friendships, family, meals together at the end of a long day, exploring Lothlórien’s extensive forests and blue-green lakes, festivals, sunrises, all the wonderful things about my home, our home, she can allow herself to be happy.

And I will do everything I can to help her get there.

A/n Thanks for reading! Likes, comments, and reblogs are always so appreciated! Also, I think I made EVERYONE sad with that last chapter, I’m so sorry. But I LOVE that we all collectively love Rumil and want him to be happy forever, right? Soooo, c’mon, hit me with some happy Rumil headcannons <3

|next chapter|

|masterlist|

Tolkien tag list: @anangelwhodidntfall @eru-vande

Haldir tag list: @tolkien-apologist @that-cute-stranger

Double Heart tag list: @lainphotography @themerriweathermage @thophil2941btw @kenobiguacamole @wishingtobeinadifferentuniverse @from-patroclus-with-love @boywivlove @ordinarymom1 @my-darling-haldir @sweet-bea-blossom @moony-artnstuff @sleepyamygdala @thranduilseyebrows

*Strikethrough means Tumblr won’t let me tag you :(*

#haldir #haldir x ofc #haldir x oc #haldir fanfic #haldir fanfiction #double heart

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wowtobio · 4 years ago

Note

hi!! i’m not really good at requests bc i’m an anxiety filled person but i really want to see nishinoya, tsukishima, hinata, and kageyama’s reactions to a s/o with rbf (resting b* face)?? i have it and people always think i’m mad 😅 i hope i’m not pressuring you!

Nishinoya, Tsukishima, Hinata and Kageyama’s reactions to an s/o w/ rbf

✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

a/n yooo i have rbf too and i get the same reactions hahaaa. and don’t be scared im open to anything 🥺 thank you for being so sweet! :) i hope u like it

Nishinoya

Alright alright so his first impressions of you he would probably come to a conclusion that you’re super cool, stoic, aloof, yanno that whole thing.

You probably remind him of Kiyoko, so effortlessly pretty yet so cold to the touch so he’ll be very attracted to you.

Noya probably doesn’t have a clue of what rbf is so he’ll be very confused when he tried to approach you at first and your face completely morphs into a more expressive one.

At one point you probably had to explain what rbf was to him because of the amount of confused expressions he shoots your way when he catches your attention.

And Noya’s just like ohhhh whaaaaa- but he totally gets it don’t worry.

It lowkey might mess with his perception of people. He’ll walk by someone who looks absolutely miserable and he’ll just be like “probs just that cbf thingy (y/n)-chan told me about”

Poor Tsukishima, Nishinoya would just tackle him on the daily because he disregards his scowl and thinks everything will be a-okay.

OK back to you

Noya would definitely pop out of nowhere in the halls and make it his mission to make you grin. And it never fails ofc

“(Y/n)-chan! You should walk around with a smile more hehe”

Tsukishima

Tsukishima generally walks around with rbf as well so he gets the same reactions and comments as you do.

Only difference is he never really changes his facial expressions like you do upon interacting with people.

He probably doesn’t even think much of it tbh.

But once y’all get closer and it has been confirmed you have rbf he would occasionally tease you about it.

“If you continue resting your face like that you’ll get wrinkles much faster”

He doesn’t mean it ofc he’s Tsukishima, he just loves seeing your cute reactions from it yanno

Pinches your cheeks upwards when your resting your face around him in private while snickering.

I can imagine that if anyone were to pick on you because of your resting face he would bluntly tell the other person to piss off.

Haha he’s like only I can pick on (y/n) like that awwh

All in all, I think deep down he loves seeing your facial expression light up. Tsuki thinks it’s absolutely adorable, but he would never admit aloud to you of course.

Hinata

He would lowkey be sooo scared of you awwh

Probably thought “ah kageyama 2.0″

But then when he realizes you have another side to you he can’t help but feel confused??? Yet so?? Attracted to you???

Opens up to you immediately and you both just click it’s almost adorable.

The more he’s around you, the more he’s used to it. Like spending time with Kageyama.

For a bit though, he couldn’t help but be like “oh shoot is she mad at me again??” upon approaching you.

If you explain rbf to him he would nooot get the concept at all haha. Like he doesn’t understand his mindset would be like just why not just walk around with a smile???

I feel like you can’t help but smile whenever Hinata comes up to you whether he tries to or not.

His energy is just 🥰🥰🥰

And Hina just enjoys seeing your expression morph into a happier one, he will be 10x more happy if that’s even possible ;;;

Kageyama

Okay it is canon that Kageyama walks around with a scary/rbf soo he’s in the same boat as you.

It would be cute, you two cross paths wearing the same scowl and it’s just like this connection

“oh my gosh i think they get it”

Mister i was born with this face wouldn’t really care at the fact that you have rbf. He would still approach you whether you had a smile on your face or nah with no thought about it

Could totally see y’all in private, cuddling and just rambling about certain stories of people pointing out your guys’ rbfs hehe

You and Kageyama would be known as the grumpy couple lmao, people would feel intimidated with just you two walking hand in hand in the halls.

it’s mostly kageyama’s intense aura dw

But it’s all good in the end, less people would dare cross paths with you and your boyfriend so it’s safe to say it is a very peaceful relationship

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masterlist

#nishinoya yuu x reader #kageyama tobio x reader #tsukishima kei x reader #hinata shoyo x reader #haikyuu #haikyuu!!#haikyu #haikyū!!#haikyuu headcanons #nishinoya yu #kageyama tobio #tsukishima kei #hinata shoyo #nishinoya #kageyama #Tsukishima #hinata

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romanianseba · 5 years ago

Text

Pretty Dresses

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: Bucky Barnes, you, and the way you love your dresses throughout the seasons.

Warnings: some angst, mentions of death, major fluff. A very, very smitten Bucky.

Word count: 6.9k

A/N: This is very special for me and I’m so proud of it, loved writing it sooo much. ‘Everybody but them knows they like each other and they don’t even think about the possibility of being liked back’ kinda fic. Enjoy!

—

winter~

Your focus goes from Bucky to the man in front of him. You study the man’s expression, analyze his body language and the speed in which he talks to Bucky through the lens of your weapon. Not a hint of suspicion in his features. What an idiot, you smirk satisfied. Bucky’s very good at this, you think proudly.

“Who’s gonna listen to my ideas from now on? Yep, Tony Stark. You better thank me properly, Anthony.” You whisper to yourself as your eyes flicker from Bucky and the guy to the small classic diner behind them and you’re relieved to see that there’s barely five people inside.

The guy seems to have no suspicion at all up to now but you never know. So you feel thankful to find the place as empty as you wanted it to be. And, as far as you can see from your position, there aren’t any other cars around besides the one your target came in. Good, he came alone. Because you’re here just in case he didn’t.

The guy you’re aiming at is about three inches shorter than Bucky, hair that reaches his ears and slightly built but not even close to match the size of a super soldier. He’s a member –a low range member, you believe, but a member nevertheless– of the criminal gang Tony and Steve had been trying to track down for almost four months. They’ve been trying to find where they hide, following them from a distance but never coming close enough. The gang is credited with about twelve innocent deaths in the past months.

Tony was desperate, until you came up with a not so original plan. Really, you didn’t understand how nobody came up with the undercover concept before.

Although you were elated that your idea was taking the form of a plan, your eyes went wide open with disbelief when Tony suggested Bucky would be the one doing the undercover part.

He would try to infiltrate and pretend to want to be part of a criminal group. Your heart raced. Pretend enough for them to allow him into their places. Your stomach churned.

Do you think he is capable? One hundred percent. Are you still terribly afraid something really bad could happen to him? One hundred and fifty percent.

I’m in. You had said determined when Tony asked who wanted to be covering Bucky’s back in this one. Haven’t done that job in a while. You shrugged when all heads on the table turned towards you, realizing only then how immediately you throw yourself into it. I want him to get comfortable with all members of the team. You should go with him next. You lied to Natasha with a sweet smile when she smirked at you knowingly after that meeting. She didn’t believe a word you said.

The dirty roof of an old, abandoned warehouse is were you lay over your stomach, across from that diner you can’t tear your eyes away from.

You smile when you see a young couple sharing a pink drink over the red table by the window. A woman in her forties sips from her coffee cup on the other side of the counter, newspaper in hand and glasses over her nose. She wears an uniform that matches the diner’s paint inside. You wish for it to stay that way as you keep an eye on Bucky and your aim on the target. You hope you won’t have to shot anybody nearby those shiny windows.

It’s an enchanting diner. You haven’t seen one in ages. It has some old 80’s vibes to it; soft blue, white and red tones, and it seems to be taken care of very well. It’s parking spot is where the team decided the first step of this mission was going to take place.

You had always wanted to own a diner like this one. Yeah, you just remembered now. Own a diner and a much more simple life. But not everything is as easy as you think it is, right? As aunt Marlize used to say. She also happened to be the reason you wanted to own a diner. That woman was the owner of the one you used to go to as a kid -every Sunday at around 11 a.m. for late breakfast of lazy Sundays.

You also remember aunt Marlize complaining about how much she hated it. Evey time I sit down to finally have my lunch because is dead empty around here, someone walks in right away. This job. It’s gonna make me die sooner, she would say. But aunt Marlize would complain just about everything really. There, that’s what made her die sooner, you think as you watch Bucky making his way back to your hiding spot once he is sure the target has left.

Your muscles relax immediately. Bucky is okay. This step was successful. You didn’t have to shot anybody and that diner will remain pretty and peaceful. Letting out a sigh you stay in position, you don’t want surprises, you watch Bucky’s back all the way until he’s by your side; all body parts where they belong.

“Hey,” Bucky lifts his left hand as he climbs the ladder to get to where you are. “You can put it down. It’s me.”

“Yeah,” You chuckle, peeking over the edge. “I’m just watching your back.”

“Thank you, doll. I felt very protected over there.” He says once he is on top and smiles at you, that million dollar smile of his. Lord, he’s beautiful.

“It is my duty to ensure your safety, Sargent.”

He laughs, “You can rest now, loyal guardian.” He swallowed the word wanted to say the most. He wanted to say my loyal guardian. Because Bucky wanted you to be his.

“Here, let me hold that for you.” He reaches and takes the heavy weapon from your hands.

"Let’s get out of here, that rat smell only gets worse every second.” You wince, shaking the dust off the front of your black dress.

Yeah, you’re wearing for this mission. You love dresses. So much. Way too much. Your mother loved dresses, your grandma loved dresses, even aunt Marlize loved dresses. Dresses feel right to you, they feel familiar, they feel like home. Naturally, you wear dresses most of your days. Comfortable, loose, flowy, colorful sundress, but also neutral sundress, dresses with an old vibe to them. It was a strange connection to you mother that you felt through the dresses you wear.

This avenger job, if you can call it a job, a responsibility maybe? It doesn’t allow you to wear them every day but you take advantage of it when you’re able to. Like today.

Today, hopefully, you were not going to fight bad guys. Today you weren’t going to get blood all over. Today your clothes weren’t going to get ripped. Today, oh pretty please, you weren’t going to run towards saving someone’s life. Today you could wear a dress for work. So you did. Of course you did. It stops just above your knee and it blows with the late evening breeze. Dark thick tights underneath because it’s the first week of winter. Combat boots, the only remaining of your official on-duty suit. And Bucky’s jacket. Because he couldn’t decide what to wear for his undercover rol, so he had thrown a bunch of his clothes in the backseat of the car that drove you here and asked you to help him look appropriate. He handed you one of the many jackets he brought when you stepped out of the car and into the chill wind in only the thin three-quarter sleeves of your dress.

“You know, I just remembered,” You tell Bucky, walking by his side as the two of you make your way to the car you were given instructions to leave a couple of miles away.

Guess this’ll have to be your workout for today, the one you avoided this morning because it’s Monday, you told Steve when he looked disapprovingly at you at breakfast.

“I always wanted to own a diner when I was a little kid,” You make a pause, “Hmm, maybe just work in there, I’m not really a boss lady.”

Bucky smiles, and it hurts. Whenever you’re the reason smiling always hurts for Bucky because he can’t control how long it stretches on his cheeks.

“It’d match your style.” He says after a moment.

“My style?”

“Yeah, the way you dress.”

You laugh at that and Bucky frowns.

“What?” His eyes meet yours with amusement and wonder.

Pretty blue eyes hold yours for a second until you shake your head and look away, faint flush painting your cheeks and a small smile lingering in your lips. “Didn’t think you notice.”

Bucky noticed. Yeah he does. He does every day. Bucky notices when you’re wearing a new dress and he knows which one you’ve had since he moved to the compound.

He remembers the dress you were wearing when he met you- and oh, how he wishes you wore it more often. He loves that baby blue dress you wear in the summer. He knows how many floral dress you have, because it’s his favorite imprint on you. It makes him feel lighter, brighter, it makes him remember picking up his mother’s favorite flowers in a spring field, it makes him feel happy.

He knows which one is your favorite because he can talk about all the times you’ve worn it in the last three months. It’s on the days that are the most special for you; the days that you look particularly happy. And if he were to buy you a dress, he knows, Bucky knows you would love it because of how much he has noticed your style. He knows the colors, patters and what lengths you usually go to. Yes, Bucky does notice.

“Why?”

You shrug. “Well, men never notice those things. It’s a miracle when they do once in their whole life. No offense.”

“Not that,” Bucky laughs, the corners of his eyes wrinkle. “Why did you want to work there?”

“Oh! You know, free strawberry milkshakes and fries.” An adorable giggle bubbles from your mouth and you shake your head when Bucky narrows his eyes playfully. “It’s just a cute place in my opinion, Bucky.”

Bucky nods.

“Do you feel like having a strawberry milkshake now?” Closing the driver’s door, Bucky has finally gathered enough courage to ask.

Silence fills the car momentarily and he rushes to believe he has crossed a line until he risks looking your way. A big grin and brighter eyes look back at him from the passenger seat. “Absolutely.”

–

spring~

“You alright, doll?”

You wanted to believe he caught you because it’s you. No, he would do it for anybody. He would. But you wanted to believe he caught you extraordinary fast because he was watching you. No, it’s just the serum running in his veins. The serum had nothing to do with that. He caught you fast because it’s you. He caught you as fast because he was watching you, your every move, since the moment you stepped out of the elevator that brought you here from your bedroom.

The way the skirt of your yellow sundress swayed as you walked. The way you were smiling at your friends, so genuine, no restrictions; your smile was as big as it naturally wanted to be, Bucky noticed, and you weren’t trying to hide it. The way your eyes lit up as they took on everything around you, decorations that Bucky thought matched your being; colorful, simple, beautiful, lighter. A flower. Like those little spring wildflowers covering the grass around the compound. The way you kept coming closer and closer to were this spring party was being held, at the spacious compound’s yard. Closer to were he was, sitting on one of those expensive looking outdoor chairs. The way your eyes stayed a little longer in the chocolate cake in the middle of the room. The way you drank your strawberry drink- which was now stained on your pretty dress. The way you looked like an angel.

Yes, an angel.

“Careful there, darling,” Tony, who was nearby when you stumbled with God knows what, walks past the two of you as Bucky balances you to your feet. “Thank God we have super soldiers around here.” He says over his shoulder, stopping in his tracks when one of his guests abruptly comes to stand right in front of him and starts talking in a smug millionaire voice.

Strange faces with expensive looking clothes and fancy mannerisms. The place is full of people that Bucky doesn’t know. And, judging by the way he has watched him exchanging barely three sentences with every person he comes across, he doubts even Tony Stark himself actually knows any of them.

Bucky didn’t really understand the actual reason or intention behind this outdoor party. He only remembers Tony’s annoying reminders for the team that Friday delivered daily for an entire month and he remembers little of the simple explanation Steve tried to give him while he was busy trying to find you in the crowd before you even arrived down here.

“Thanks, Bucky.” Your embarrassed mumble is almost not even there and Bucky thinks the flush in your cheeks is the prettiest pink he has ever seen.

God, you’re considered to be part of the earth’s mightiest heroes and you almost crashed face first onto the neatly trimmed grass if it weren’t for Bucky’s quick reaction because you were not paying attention to what was in front of you.

“Hey,” He exhales softly. “Like Tony said, thank God I was around.”

You can’t help the grin that reaches your eyes. It made you happy, the way he no longer referred to Tony as Stark, now he calls him Tony. Now he feels more comfortable. It’s been almost three years. The team is no longer a group of strangers for him. He wants to know them. He wants to go out with them and get close. He knows he can trust this people. He has noticed how this people trust him. Now he knows he belongs.

Yes, yes, Bucky. Thank God you’re around.

“I got a little distracted and…” Words die in your tongue as you squint at the hem of his dark grey shirt. “God, it got to your shirt, too. I’m so sorry, Bucky.”

Looking down he spots a faint red stain but he doesn’t care one bit, he’ll remember this moment and how adorable embarrassed you look whenever he wears it.

“It’s fine. It’ll wash off.”

“If it doesn’t, you know where to find me. I’ll take the responsibility.”

He chuckles. “Don’t worry about that, doll.”

“Well, I think I’m gonna need another drink,” You look down to your dress. “And a change of clothes.”

“That’s a good color on you.” It escapes his mouth before he can think it over as he usually does.

And it’s only then, when his deep husky voice falls right over your ear, that you realize how close he is and, looking up, everything you see is baby blue. You smile at him, all teeth and rosy lips and bright eyes that reflect the sun and Bucky swears he’s dreaming.

“You think so?” A sweet, sweet and nervous laugh falls from your lips and it’s angelic; Bucky thinks the sound is angelic.

“Yeah.” He sounds almost out of breath.

And you have to tear your eyes away from him because it feels like you are about to drown in his intense blues.

“I think you would rock yellow, Bucky. I’d love to see that.”

Bucky always hated to wear yellow. Were man even allowed to wear yellow? He doesn’t care. Because now he would stand to wear it, as long as he sees you smile about it the same way you’re smiling at him now. He would wear yellow every day if it meant you were going to smile like that for him.

“Welcome, welcome, everyone! It’s a wonderful afternoon and we’re just getting started…” Your heads turn to where Tony is standing holding a mic when his energetic voice is heard through the entire place.

Bucky groans inside. Just getting started? Been here for about an hour already.

But then you face him again, sweetly smile up at him and suddenly Bucky doesn’t care how much longer he’ll have to stay.

–

summer~

“Where do you get all these cute doll dresses from?”

It comes out unexpected amongst the chaos in the kitchen over breakfast. Unexpected for you. For the whole team bumping against each other, taking turns to make their individuals breakfast. Unexpected for Bucky, the owner of the voice that just made that question. Muttered but clear, loud enough for everyone to hear. Did he intend to say that out loud? Was it just a casual thought that escaped his grasp way too fast? It was debatable; for you, for Bucky, for everyone now exchanging discreet knowing looks and badly hidden half smiles across the kitchen.

It is questionable in Bucky’s mind whether he had wanted to say that out loud. But he is positively aware about the one unquestionable truth; the connection between mind, thought filter and speaking was inexistent when you are near him.

And you are. Delicately setting pieces of your sandwich together right beside him at the adjacent side of the counter. You are pretty close to him and he can’t help his thoughts about you ever, but especially when you are this close.

Damn Sunday mornings when everybody feels like spending a ridiculous amount of time and effort making breakfast, gathering all enormous shoulders and muscle in the relatively spacious kitchen -but enormous shoulders and muscle-, all at the same time, ridiculously early for a Sunday morning because everyone in this house seems to have a permanent hen-like biological clock.

Bucky’s cheeks turn pink the moment you lay your eyes on him; eyebrows high, wide eyes, mind processing what you just heard, mouth open but nothing comes out, cheeks equally flushed because damnit if you’re not internally struggling to chill. Was that a compliment? From Bucky? Bucky? Buc-

“Uh, I-” You swallow, lick your lips nervously, “Do you-” Inhaling to regain some sort of maturity. Dang it, how old am I? “Do you like my dresses,” It’s more of a statement than a question.

Bucky shifts awkwardly on the counter stool, “Yeah, I-” Clears his throat, looks down at the oatmeal bowl in front of him.

“Do you think they’re cute?” A smile starts forming on your lips when his eyes lift to yours again.

Sam groans from the stove, dramatically rolling his eyes, “You idiots, stop acting like you’re not in lov- ouch!” He whines when Wanda pinches his bicep.

“Not your business,” She hisses.

“It’s so obvious, are they blind-”

“Shut up,” Natasha demands with a grin, washing her vegetables in the sink while Sam glares at the back of her head.

It doesn’t matter because whatever everyone else is doing or saying is muffled in the back of your lovesick minds.

The smile tugging on Bucky’s lips eventually matches the size of yours as he answers, “I mean… yeah. They look good on you. And you have your own style, that’s… pretty cool actually.”

He shrugs slightly. As if he weren’t affected by it everyday, as if he didn’t love it so much.

“Well I-,” You go back to your unfinished sandwich with shaky hands because he’s doing that thing again when he stares like you’re the only person in the room. Like you are an exotic discovery that must be put under scrutinized inspection. And you can’t breathe properly when he does. “I buy them online, or-”

“Wow, really?”

You laugh at his amazed tone. “Yeah.”

“How do you know they’ll fit?”

“It’s a process, Bucky. But it’s fun! I also go out there to see what I can find. And I’ve made some of them myself.”

“Are you for real?” He sounds amazed. It’s adorable. Absolutely astonished.

“I can teach you,” You laugh playfully.

He laughs along, “That’ll be fun.”

“For real, I will teach you.”

“Doll, I’m in.” Bucky beams as he watches you place thin sliced tomato over lettuce. “You like them so much, don’t you?”

“Dresses?” You catch his nod by the corner of you eye. “I do a lot.”

“Why?” He asks with nothing but curiosity and you smile bigger.

“It’s a special connection with my mother. She’s not here anymore but that’s how it feels when I wear them.”

When your eyes find his again, Bucky notices the light in your eyes is brighter and his heart goes fast. He can see right through them; the sincerity and how much you mean what you said. And God, do they shine so beautiful.

“That’s amazing, doll.” He whispers with genuine interest.

You stare dumbly at each other for a moment until you look back down shyly, flushed cheeks, timid smile; Bucky looks down at the same time, clears his throat again as if stepping out of a trance and hides his equally timid smile with a spoon full of oats and berries.

After a minute, you speak again, “Also, it’s so easy to put one on, and you don’t really have to think about combinations. You’re done when you throw a dress over your head,” You chuckle, “So, emotional value but also practicality. And comfiness, let’s never forget you can move around with liberty.”

And Bucky doesn’t care how crowded the kitchen is on Sunday mornings, or the overwhelming smell of all sorts of different dishes when you beam at him warmly, like the sun outside.

It’s one of those days. All he wanted was to stay home. There are various steps of progress, just as there are steps back. Trauma isn’t something you can move on from easily. It takes years. If it actually even comes to an end before death reaches for you first. Sentiments of unworthiness plagued him once in a while. Not as often as it used to, but they’re there. Days like today. Mentally and physically exhausting missions adding to it all this time around. One after another during the last two weeks.

Bucky’s eyes squint with the summer sun as watches everyone from afar. People he wants to get to know better when it’s not a day like today. He hears the laughs, the bantering, but his eyes keep coming back to you. Sunlight hitting your face gives you rosy cheeks, wide smile matching the light of that infinite light, half of your hair tied up messily, the sound of your sweet laugh as you chat with Wanda standing on wet sand, water covering your feet when a new wave crashes against the seashore. Bucky thinks you’re as bright as the sun, small embroidered flowers covering the white dress that stops bellow your knees, a walking ray of sunshine.

You look pure and innocent and so, so sweet. Sweet, like the coconut water you were drinking a few minutes ago. And he finds himself wondering how someone so sweet can be so lethal when required. His minds travels for a second to your sparring sessions with Steve, the confidence and strength you show on missions.

“Man, you have to stop just looking at her,” Sam leans down beside him to bury his beer in the sand. “You’re wasting time over here.”

It provided reassurance for Bucky. Words he didn’t know he desperately needed to hear. Some sort of confirmation outside his mind that he is allowed to fall in love and receive that kind of love back at this point in his life. It’s possible, it’s still wanted, it’s needed and deserved. It is not too late.

His heart aches when he thinks about how he’s been a little distant with you since that Sunday breakfast conversation you both had a week ago. You’ve noticed the exhaustion in his eyes, deciding it was good to give him some time and space; unaware of the actual reason behind his exhaustion. Forget about tough missions. Undeserving thoughts plague him specially right after getting a bit closer to you. His heart flutters and he believes and he hopes. And then, he’s not good enough, and you’re too good for him.

Giving Bucky one last glance and a smirk, Sam runs to join the rest, splashing salty water all over Wanda when he gives it a hard kick with his foot.

Pushing away wet hair sticking over her face, Wanda stands still, staring down in disbelief as your hands rush up to cover your mouth, attempting to suppress your laughter.

Still from a distance, watching everything with a grin on his face, Bucky leans down to bury his own beer right when the beach chair next to him lights up in a reddish tone, floats on its own and goes flying in the blink on an eye towards Sam, who crouches down with his arms tightly wrapped over his head just in time for the manipulated chair to fly over him and land on the water. Bucky’s eyes go wide, seeing nonliving stuff floating around by control of Wanda’s hands always takes him by surprise.

“Guys, can you stop acting like first graders?” Tony shouts from further away, his head being the only part of his body visible outside the water. Natasha floating peacefully on her back behind him.

The chair crashes against Sam’s side repeatedly when Wanda makes it slide over the surface pulling an exaggerated groan out of its victim. “Hey! Okay, I’m sorry! Wan!”

Shaking your head at such displays of affection of your friends for one another, you turn around, smiling indeed as bright as the sun when your eyes find Bucky’s and waving hello from afar. His mouth mirrors yours as he waves back. Eyes stay connected while both of your overthinking minds debate whether it’s a good idea to approach the other or not.

You win first against yours. Heart drums at a fast speed inside his chest when you approach him slowly, your white dress creating moving shadows on the sand.

“Come, Bucky,” You say sweetly when you reach him, leaning down to grab his hand in yours. “The water is so nice.” You add, tugging at it for him to stand up. “Wanda won’t throw things your way as long as you don’t bother her.”

A sweet laugh falls from your lips as you hold his hand all the way back to the seashore. Not letting go even after fresh water crashes against Bucky’s feet and goes up his ankles.

“Close your eyes, Bucky. Feel everything that is around you.” You whisper next to him. Hands still clasped together.

Feel everything that is around you

Eyes closed, he does what he’s told; the weight of your hand around his, fine sand under his bare feet, refreshing water covering his feet, sunlight touching his heated skin, sea breeze ruffling loose strands of hair that fell from his bun, an entire awe-inspiring ocean in front of him. And Bucky only feels you.

autumn~

Ice cream cones, dogs, pineapples and stars imprints. The dresses you wear started to get very peculiar by the end of the summer and through the few first weeks of autumn.

It’s like a door was opened and I have new endless possibilities before me. You said enthusiastically one time Sam asked about your current dress situation.

Until you stopped wearing them.

Bucky is aware you don’t wear dresses every single day of your life. There’s this particular week every month that it’s actually not that comfortable, nor convenient to wear a dress, Bucky. You had told him with a tender smile dancing on your lips at his curiosity when he –pre- rehearsed, pre-meditated and over-considered– had asked you casually why you weren’t wearing any dresses during a certain week a few months ago. And with flushed cheeks, once Natasha had illuminated him with what you meant by that, Bucky nodded. And he got it. He understands.

The thing is, you haven’t in four weeks. Three of which were spent at the compound. Three weeks at home, one week on a mission overseas. Three weeks off duty and you haven’t worn a dress. For three weeks. At home. Where you’re free to wear them anytime you want.

“No, Bucky. It doesn’t. For the hundredth time, it doesn’t last three weeks.” Natasha groaned during breakfast today when he asked her again if your time of the month could last that long.

Over and over again, for all the time you’ve been acting weird, Bucky has been going to her with the same question; ~but what if… ~Nat, you sure there’s not a chance… ~would Wanda know better… -to which Natasha had sent him daggers in the form of a glare- ~why would it be three weeks? ~is she okay? ~haven’t you talk to her? ~but why…

Because not only were you not dressing the way you loved, you had also lost that optimistic attitude and that joyful behavior that lights up every room. And lastly, Bucky noticed sadly, the light in your eyes was gone.

“She’s acting the same way, are you really that sure?” He pushed desperately that morning, absently moving the cereal inside the bowl in front of him. “Looks like the same symptoms, only so much worse.”

Natasha sighed in defeat, talking slowly, “She’s going through a hard time right now. And I’m only telling you this because I hope so profoundly that you will stop asking the same question every single day. Bucky, I appreciate you a lot, but you are driving me crazy. It is not my place to tell you how she feels right know. Only she decides what she wants to share with each one of us, I’m not taking that away from her. I know it’s not easy for her right now and that’s all I’m gonna give you. And no, it’s not because of that time of the month so please stop it.” She begged exasperated.

Looking into his uneasy blue eyes, her expression softened.

“Look, I know she trusts you and she feels comfortable around you. Why don’t you just ask her what’s going on?” She had encouraged him with tender eyes. “She’ll have a better answer to how she’s feeling than I ever will.” Sending a wink his way, the redhead jumped off the stool beside him, dropped a dirty bowl by the sink and walked out the kitchen door.

And that’s what he does. At least, in a way. In his way.

Leaving out a shaky breath, Bucky stares at your closed door, sweaty hands holding the envelope tightly.

He decided wrapping a gift rather than throwing it into a gift bag or a box would give more intention and meaning to it.

It turned out neatly done, a brown-ish ribbon going around and tied on top. Wanda helped when she found him cursing the red tutorial app on the screen of his phone, balls of ruined gift wrap on the floor all around him. I think she’ll love it. She had said. You don’t know who this is for. Bucky replied. Right… I don’t, right? She smirked knowingly.

Looking down at the note he wrote attached to the ribbon, Bucky sighs one more time and places the envelope gently on the floor in front of your door.

I hope the reason you don’t wear them anymore is because you ran out of them; and not because you’ve grown tired of them.

Bucky.

This was Bucky’s way. A silent reminder that he cares about you.

Questions like how are you feeling? can I do something for you? do you want to talk about it?, those didn’t really worked for him. When he was new into this word, those questions didn’t help. He needed space and time, not a constant reminder that something was wrong with him.

And so he was grateful every time you would do something for him, no words spoken. Just little actions that showed him you were there, and that you cared and appreciated him being around.

No pity. Not being sensitive around him. Actions that showed him you were not afraid. Pouring a cup of coffee for him in the mornings. Making space for him on the couch without looking. Normal. He felt normal when you did things like that. Like he didn’t need to be treated a special way. Eyes weren’t on him the whole time to see his every move when you were the only one in a room with him.

Bucky didn’t want to come up to you with those questions. He didn’t want to make you feel like you had to share something with him when you weren’t ready. A dress is what he bought for you. A silent reminder; I’m here for you. I notice, and I care.

It takes you some time to find him, but you finally spot him by the tall bare trees around the compound. Hundreds of dry, colorful, autumn leaves covering the ground, creaking under your feet. And, if you weren’t in such state of mind, you would be laughing and throwing handfuls of fallen leaves into the air. Autumn is such a wonderful time of the year.

His back is to you and his hair looks messy, and curly, and so soft; makes you want to get your hands on it.

“Bucky.”

“Hey, doll.”

Bucky takes you in when he turns around. Dress or not, you’re beautiful. Sweatpants, an oversized shirt. Always beautiful.

“Hi.”

He smiles fondly, “Hi.”

“Thank you. For the…” Your lip trembles and Bucky isn’t sure, but he thinks he sees your eyes get watery before you bolt forward, surprising him when you wrap your arms around him tightly. “Thanks, Bucky,” Your voice is muffled against his hoodie. “It means a lot to me.”

He exhales, his smile grows, his heart drums happily. Unsure of how much he should hold you, his arms go around your shoulders lightly, even when his whole body wants to hold you so close until it is impossible to know whether there are two bodies or just one.

“I thought it would cheer you up,” He whispers, his breath tickling your scalp at the top of your head. “I don’t know what you’re going through. It’s okay if you don’t wanna talk about it. But I’m here. If you need me. I’ll do anything for you.” He speaks slowly as his flesh fingers squeeze your shoulder gently and you pull away with a smile; though, he notices, it doesn’t reach your eyes.

“I know you would.” And he knows you’re being sincere when you hold his gaze.

Taking a deep breath, you walk past him. Facing him again after a minute when you lean your back against a big tree catching a yellow leaf as it falls, twisting its little stem between your fingers. He watches you cautiously.

“Remember when I told you about what dresses mean to me?”

Bucky blinks and then nods, smiling. “I do. It makes you remember your mother.”

“Yeah,” Your voice cracks a little and his smile falls. “My whole family actually. Dad always loved them,” Your eyes are on his shoes as your continue. “He loved seeing mamma, me and my little sisters wear them.” Bucky watches one side of your mouth slightly twitching upwards. “It was tree years ago… when I lost them all.”

You finally look up and Bucky sees tears pooling your eyes.

“I guess I had deprived the grief before because I was always busy and we never stopped working after what happened,” Your voice is totally trembling now and tears are falling free down your cheeks. “I pushed it aside for so long, and I’m truly just now processing everything, and my younger sister,” You choke a little and Bucky clenches his fists because he wants to hold you so tight and wipe the hurt away. “Little Lyla, she would- would have turned four two weeks ago and it’s just so much, Bucky. She was- she was just a baby.”

Both of your hands cover your mouth as you sob, full of years and shaking violently. And Bucky can’t take it anymore, he strides towards you hastily and cages you in his arms. Tight.

“Oh, sweetheart. I’m so sorry,” His metal hand cradles your head against his chest and there are tears in his own eyes as he mumbles against the top of your head, “So sorry, baby.”

He has heard about what happened with your parents, in the New York attack; but he never knew you had little sisters.

“I’ve protected so many people and I couldn’t keep them safe. The most- the most important for me.” Your fingers grip the fabric on his back.

“No, doll. No,” Bucky closes his eyes, jaw clenched, tears covering his cheeks, pained to the core. “It was not your fault, not your fault.”

He wants to shatter the guild and grief that you’re feeling and protect you from it forever.

“My parents would have been twenty five years of being married yesterday and it was mom’s biggest dream to celebrate it, she would talk about it all the time and I don’t know what to do, Bucky.” You sob against him, letting everything out.

“It’s okay, I’m here.” His fingers stroke your hair soothingly.

And he just hold you for a moment and you let him; you need it. More leaves slowly falling all around you. It would be magical and romantic in different circumstances.

“Sorry.” You cry, throat dry and it hurts and Bucky’s heart falls in pieces.

How someone so sweet can be so broken.

“Hey,” He says softly. “No, you don’t have to apologize about anything.”

“I was so distant…”

“It’s okay, doll. It’s okay.”

“That’s why I didn’t- I couldn’t wear anything that remind me… I would see them all if I- if I put a dress on I would see my family,” You sob. “I miss them a lot.”

“I know. I know. I’m sorry,” He whispers. “I’m sorry if I made you remember. I didn’t know.”

“No, Bucky,” You shake your head firmly. “I love it. Thank you. Thank you so much. It made me feel so much better. I love it.”

Bucky holds you some more, until you’re not shaking and your breath is almost even.

“I want to try it on,” Your voice is raspy. Pulling away, the back of your hands go up to sweep against your cheeks. “I want you to see it first.” A small smile graces your tear stained face as you look up at him shyly.

“Okay.”

His hand outstretches to you and you take it without a second thought, letting him lead the way back to the compound.

Anticipation running hot in his veins, and he feels the excitement in his belly when he waits patiently outside your bedroom door. Bottom lip trapped between his teeth because all he can think about is how you’ll look with that dress and he’s grinning so hard.

The enhanced ear catches every little shuffle inside and he arranges his hair and straightens his posture when he catches the soft paddle of your feet approaching the door. And the air is kicked out of his lungs as soon as you open it and he takes you in.

“What do you think?”

“I think it was made just for you.”

“I really love it. It’s my favorite now. Just wanted to let you know I’m gonna wear it a lot.”

Bucky chuckles; smiling so big because the scene in front of him is so much better than image he had in mind. “Can’t wait.”

“It’s the best thing I have ever been given,” You look down, running your hands over the soft fabric of the beautiful green dress. “Thank you again, Bucky.”

“I’m glad you still like them, you know,” He shrugs.

“Of course.”

And, taking a leap of faith –and courage–, Bucky steps closer. One step. Then, another one, slower and more hesitant than the first. Your breath hitches when your shoes touch the tip of his, and you find his eyes when his left hand touches your cheek. The cold metal a welcoming temperature to your flushed skin.

“You look beautiful,” Thumb gently strokes under your eye, “And– you’re so strong. I’m proud of you,” His voice is so gentle, his eyes even more, they hold so much sincerity and tenderness, looking at them makes your heart believe what others have told you. “You’ve made it this far. So many would have given up long ago. I’m so proud.”

Bucky doesn’t miss the way your eyes lit up the longer he holds you. Eyes that compete with the stars look up at him; hopeful, bright, wanting. And Bucky jumps, the leap of faith, erases the distance that keeps you two apart. Tender lips pressed to yours, soft and lovely.

He met you wearing a dress. He fell for you wearing a dress. He hold your hand first time when you wearing a dress. Kissed you for the first time when you were wearing a dress. Loved you wearing a dress. Made love to you for the first time, a floral dress rucked up around your waist. He wanted to marry you, and you would be wearing a dress. Bucky wanted to grow old watching you wear pretty dresses for the rest of his life.

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