#no Ed don’t eat those mushrooms

[awholebunchobananas]

This is exactly how Ed and Stede’s first night as innkeepers would go.

“Fucking nature!”

[atmilliways]

Wrong On The Money (42)

part 42 of ?? | 1572 words | Teen+

Blackmail fic on Ao3 | on tumblr

Summary:

“Steve?” Eddie calls from the living room, back already. “Are you singing Pat Benatar songs in there?”

42.

Steve calls a number he memorized years ago and orders pizza: cheese for Eddie, veggie plus pepperoni hold the mushrooms for himself. (Wayne will eat either, so no worries on leftovers.) He bustles around the kitchen, humming at first then singing under his breath as he gets plates and beers and paper napkins.

“Steve?” Eddie calls from the living room, back already. “Are you singing Pat Benatar songs in there?”

He pauses to play back the latest bit of lyrics in his head, then smirks and calls back, “Just the one. Why, you recognize it?”

There’s a suspicious lack of response.

“Eds? You still there, buddy, or did Pat scare you away? Come on man, be strong. No one can tell you you’re wrong.”

Steve chuckles at the good-natured groan from the other room, heading back in there with everything he’s collected. He feels light, unburdened by all the shit of the past several years—partly from the weed, but mostly because he’s happy. Despite his uncertainty about the older Hellfire members, Eddie’s reassurance and willingness to hang out with him is helping.

“Plates for pizza?” Eddie comments, glancing up from the new joint in progress. “Fancy.” His tongue darts out to wet the paper, finishing it up, and Steve tries not to be too obvious about tracking the motion. 

Keep it together, Harrington.

He plops down as close as last time without thinking about it, but to no complaints. Must be fine, then. 

They crack into their beers, chow down on pizza once it shows up, and smoke some more. (Wayne won’t care about the smell, Eddie assured him, so long as they air the place out a bit so he doesn’t come home to a hotbox.) They don’t even put on TV or watch a movie, they just talk. 

They talk about the kids and their inability to not babble over each other whenever they get excited. About the high school teachers they’d had in common, ranking them on a scale of ‘tyrant’ to ‘mind-numbingly dull’. Even a little about some of the stuff that had happened in March—and Steve kind of loves that they can take shit as traumatic and horrible as all that and make it into something a little lighter.

Eddie keeps forgetting to use his plate and drips grease and pizza sauce all over his ripped jeans. Steve snickers at him every single time, making smug and liberal use of his napkin while Eddie’s own remains untouched. “Pretty sure I can guess what those mattress stains were now.”

Meanwhile, Eddie snickers right back every time he coughs on a hit. “Oh come on, man, it’s like you’ve never gotten high before! What did you do with the stuff I sold you before, eat it?”

“I smoked it, jeez,” Steve protests. “Without the fuckin' . . . peanut gallery laughing at me every time.”

Eddie leans closer, battle jacket shed a while ago. He’s down to some metal band shirt that’s been heavily doctored with scissors. When he hunches his shoulders forward it hollows out twin divots beneath his collarbones and the shirt droops to where his scars and the ravaged tattoos on his chest are visible. (Steve tries not to look. . . . Not very hard, though.) His voice is low and a little rough as he says, “I bet you’d still cough just shotgunning it.”

“You’re on,” Steve retorts without thinking. 

He continues not thinking while Eddie smirks, wipes any lingering pizza sauce from his mouth with the back of his hand, and brings the joint to his lips. His cheeks go concave as he inhales, and Steve watches it all with his mind totally blank. It’s easier that way.

Shotgunning is a party trick he’s used plenty of times. He’s done it with beer and he’s done it with weed, but . . . to impress girls. It’s different, with someone else taking the lead. Nerve-wracking. Although that might, he thinks, be because it's Eddie.

Eddie, who leans in further with the faintest trickle of smoke escaping his mouth, closer, until his chapped lips and stubble-shadowed chin bump against Steve’s. Electricity buzzing under his skin, Steve tilts his head and they open their mouths in tandem, fitting together perfectly.

He all but gasps on Eddie’s long, languid exhale, taking it all in. 

And doesn’t cough. 

They linger for a long moment, still sharing air, and Steve still doesn’t have thoughts exactly. His body is screaming at him to dip forward, close the gap, kiss him already, but at the same time he can’t move. Can’t face the possibility that he’s reading this wrong. He wants to linger here for the rest of time, forever a mere breath from kissing Eddie Munson.

Then Eddie flops back to his side of the couch. “Guess I stand corrected.”

Steve wets his lips and leans back too, feeling so hollowed out by disappointment that he could scream and scream until all he hears is echoes. 

In a distant sort of way, he knows that Eddie is talking again. The cadence of a story. 

Serves him right for getting his hopes up, he thinks, but it still stings. Of course Eddie being into guys doesn’t mean he’s into him. Steve knows he’s not, that’s why he’d avoided remembering as much during what just happened. Now, though, he can’t help but think about it. He sits there and stews in his feelings, until—

“What would you have done if you hadn’t known I was in the club?” Steve blurts, interrupting whatever Eddie’s changed the subject to. He winces. Shit. “Uh, sorry. Never mind, you don’t. . . . You don’t have to answer that.”

He’s not looking, doesn’t dare, but he can feel the motions of Eddie fiddling with the now-spent joint next to him. 

“I mean. . . .” Eddie clears his throat, shrugs, fidgets some more. “Found someone to hook up with, probably.”

Not a lot of options for that in Hawkins. Right. Steve both understands and doesn’t, because he’s always had the option of girls. Now he’s in deep over a guy for the first time, and it’s not even. . . . It’s not just a physical thing. He’s seen how much Eddie cares, how hard he fights for the people he cares about, and Steve wants to be one of them. Wants the opportunity to give that back to Eddie in spades because he deserves it. He looks at Eddie and thinks, You deserve everything. 

It would be so much easier if it was only a physical thing, but Steve’s never been that lucky. 

“What about you?” Eddie asks, not looking at him. Which is weird, because Steve kinda feels like he’s been watching him all night. Had that been wishful thinking too?

“I was just there to dance,” Steve admits. “Get lost in the crowd for a while. I wasn’t even drinking.”

There’s a quirk to the corner of Eddie’s mouth that he doesn’t know how to read. “Dancing all by your lonesome, Stevie?”

He shrugs, still studying Eddie in the hopes of figuring him out. Had he given himself away? Had he been too much? God, Steve can’t even decide what’s worse. 

“No, I danced with some guys. Nothing that left the dance floor, if that’s what you’re asking. I’m not that easy.” 

As soon as the words come out, he realizes that might be a little mean. A little bit King Steve. 

“Shit, not that I’m trying to imply that you’re—” The thought makes a little zing of jealousy twist through Steve’s guts, and he immediately tries to wallpaper over it with more words. “I went to turn my brain off for a while, like I used to do with swimming. I’d swim laps in my backyard until I couldn’t anymore. But I haven’t been able to do that since . . . since Barb. So I found that place—I mean, I went looking, I didn’t know if I’d find one. And I wasn’t looking to—I’ve never, uh, with a guy before. I mean, I’m definitely bisexual, I just haven’t . . . figured out how to be. Yet. It’s a work in progress!”

At some point in all that, Steve stopped paying attention. He tunes back in and Eddie is staring at him now, all big brown doe eyes and mouth lax with surprise. 

And Steve can’t help looking. 

There’s no way that Eddie doesn’t notice. No way. But—

“And you haven’t been back there this entire time?” Eddie asks, sounding dumbfounded. “Not even after Spring Break? Jesus, Stevie, if I went that long without turning off my brain I’d probably just. . . .” He mimes his head exploding, sound effects and all. “You gotta take better care of yourself, man. You’ve earned it.”

The words settle over him like a warm, heavy blanket. He’d earned it. Eddie thinks he’s earned it. 

For all that Steve feels like he’s swimming in his own head—definitely feeling the weed, the one beer, and extra oomph of combining the two, there—he darts forward fast. His lips meet Eddie’s first, one hand cupping his jaw a beat behind, but once he’s there he stays. He melts his heart down and pours it into the kiss, slow and molten and demanding nothing.

Just. Whatever else happens, whatever the fallout is going to be, he’ll figure that out later. Steve has never been the guy making the elaborate plans. He takes things one play at a time, and right now this is his. All he needs right now is for Eddie to know.

[missguomeiyun]

Homecooking [May ed]

Be proud of me :P  I cooked more this month haha

I also did some night shifts. .. & lived thru over a week of really poor air quality. I shouldn’t be complaining, considering ppl have lost homes, businesses, & community facilities/shops but it was just so bad. It’s bad for me, so I could only imagine what it’s like for ppl with respiratory or heart problems. Every yr there are wildfires here but I read somewhere that this is the 1st time AB beat BC in ‘starting’ of wildfires. Like our Albertan wildfires aren’t supposed to start yet but we had a few days where temperature was 10degrees above average, plus the winds. .. Yikes!!

^ that’s the sun at 0815h o_O !!!!

Now that short track season, primarily the World Championships ended. .. the sports event I was looking to was the Sudirman Cup for badminton. It’s held every 2 yrs & this yr, the venue is was in Suzhou - China’s 1st international badminton event in over 3 yrs! Can’t say much about the venue bcos I only see the inside & it’s focussed on a court lol but BWF inserts travel-themed clips in the opening of every live so I got to see some of the views in Suzhou. I’ve actually been there! Anyway, what a wild ride!!! I won’t give spoilers but the CHN vs JPN semi-finals. .. YOU NEED TO WATCH IT! At least the highlights. So much drama!! The finals... I was a little disappointed. I thought KOR vs CHN would be a tight battle but . ..

Alrighty, let’s get to the food~

Random flour noodle with choy sum & egg.

The same package of noodle with choy sum & Busan fish cake.

lol you can tell these were my post-night shift meal... I tend to go for simpler stuff, & in smaller portions bcos I eat 6 times when I’m working nights...

Air fryer egg plant. You may think it’s weird.. . but I really like it.

Fettuccine with tomato + vegetarian sausage

Udon with capa cabbage & grey squash. Another one of those night shift stretch meals.

Mom’s air fryer chicken

vs .. my air fryer chicken

*she added Chinese soy sauce to it for a better colour hence why it’s so dark

There were not as good I thought. It’s gotta be the plain Costco fries :P

Thick rice noodles + egg + cucumber, seasoned with Korean tartar sauce & fish sauce (the green cap squid one). This is probably the most randomest thing I ‘put together’ this month haha! Usually the thin vermicelli noodles are used but I used the thick soup kind of rice noodles. Then the combo of tartar sauce + fish sauce... But trust me, it was good!

Using the raclette grill for the 1st time this year

Air fryer ribs with a hamburger bun

A closer look. I used the Montreal steak spice with some extra fresh ground black pepper. Yum~

Sujebi with baby bokchoy, seaweed, white beech mushrooms, & an egg~

Udon with napa cabbage, carrot thins & egg.

May book #1: The Obsession. It was quite an easy read (recommended to me via Chapters recommendation based on my purchase history lol). I didn’t think it was ‘thrilling’ enough for be called a thriller but that’s bcos this is a YA fiction novel so the intended audience is YA. The storyline itself was well thought out but was predictable. I thought the ending was a bit rushed. Read it for relaxation~ I rate it 7.8/10~

May novel #2: Just Haven’t Met You Yet. A rom-com that could easily be made into a movie or drama. I thought the main girl was a pathetic - the type that “I don’t know what I want; my life has been a lie”. You know, the aimless, not driven type of lead that you can’t relate to. Or maybe you can *shrugs* I bought it bcos it begins with “suitcase switch-up” & I thought, “ooooh totally K-drama plot”. I enjoyed it overall; with some slow moments. I really like the main girl’s boss. 8.0/10 (lower than expected)

May novel #3: the Eighth Girl. What a fantastic debut novel by this author~  this novel was very thrilling & dark. It’s about a girl with DID & she goes through things.. . The plot itself is simple to understand but I love twists & novels that make me think. This was one of those. It’s better to start reading without reading up on it so I will leave it here!

K ttyl!!

[hangovercurse]

I’ll Be Here

Colson tries to take you out for a nice dinner, but things don’t go exactly as planned.

Request: “hey there !! i absolutely love your work and was wondering if you'd consider writing something where the reader struggles with an ED? and Colson finds out? Just an angsty hurt/comfort-y kind of thing maybe? If you aren't comfortable/don't have the time then no worries !! I hope you have a lovely day ♥️🐇”

Colson x reader

Warnings: Eating disorders (explicit), cursing, vomit

A/N: If you are struggling with an eating disorder, there is help. The National Eating Disorders Association Hotline is 1-800-931-2237 and the national hopeline (for any and all crises) 1-800-442-4673. It gets better, I promise.

A/N part 2: This is really personal to me, as I am currently in treatment for an ED and still very much suffer from those impulses. If you are struggling and need to talk to someone who has been where you are, my dms are always open.

Word Count: 3107

Friday nights were always date nights. They had been since you and Colson had gone out on a Friday for your first date, 3 months ago. And tonight was no exception, but you wanted nothing more than to cancel.

Colson had announced he would be taking you to a very fancy restaurant that would be serving you both a five-course meal. “Babe, I won’t be able to eat all of that.” You told him, being completely serious.

He laughed it off, thinking you were just being overdramatic. “Don’t worry, I’ll eat whatever you don’t.” You pretended to laugh along, but in reality, your stomach was churning with the thought of how much food you’d be eating come Friday.

And now it was here, and you felt no more confident in yourself. You hadn’t eaten in almost two days to prepare for this, even though you’d gone longer for less before. You had been trying to eat more whenever Colson was around so he wouldn’t pick up on anything, but he was starting to be around a lot more, and it was getting harder to fake normalcy.

You were getting ready at your house, your hair and makeup done. You pulled the dress you planned on wearing out of your closet, a loose black dress with gold accents on it. You were hoping that it’s flowing would hide your figure. You caught a glimpse of yourself in your mirror, only a bra and underwear covering you. You scowled in disgust at your figure, sucking in your stomach and straightening your posture to try and flatten yourself out, but it didn’t help.

Before you could get more upset with yourself, you turned away from the mirror and put the dress on. “Tonight is going to be a good night.” You chanted to yourself.

Colson picked you up, looking sexy as ever. He was in a pair of blue pants, a plain white t-shirt, and a blue jacket. “You clean up nicely.” You smiled as he pulled you in for a quick kiss.

“You look fuckin’ incredible, babe.” He told you as he separated your lips. “Like, seriously, how did I get so lucky?”

You rolled your eyes, cringing internally but externally walking to the other side of his car. “If anyone here is lucky it’s me.”

The restaurant was, as he promised, hella fancy. The hostess led you both to a table in the far corner of the restaurant, away from peering eyes. You were handed a menu with five course headings on it and 3 options under each.

You looked at Colson with wide eyes, only to find him grinning at the menu. You decided not to say anything, not wanting to ruin his good night with all of your problems. You knew he would find out eventually, but you determined that tonight would not be that time. So, you gave the waitress your orders. Colson ordered a bottle of white wine for you two to sip on.

Before you know it, the first course had arrived. It was small, thank goodness, as it was only hors d’oeuvres, but you usually only ate that much food in a day, you couldn’t imagine how the next courses would go.

You had to admit, despite your hatred for food, the shallot and pancetta tortilla crisps were good. You figured this could be easy if you just let yourself relax. You let yourself fall into easy conversation with your boyfriend.

Then the appetizer came out, stuffed mushrooms. You struggled your way through, eating very slowly so that Colson would hopefully not notice that you were only eating half the amount that he was.

You got about halfway through your salad before your entire body said “stop.” You physically couldn’t eat anymore, the thought of holding your fork made you want to throw up. You got distracted by trying to calm yourself down that you were completely ignoring Colson.

“Y/N, are you listening?”

You snapped your head up from your plate to meet his eyes, a sorry expression coming onto your face. “Yeah, sorry. I just got distracted. I’m good.”

Colson eyed you wearily before continuing whatever he was talking about. The waitress brought out the fourth course in the meantime; your main meal. You had gotten Chicken Francese, hoping it would be the lightest thing on the menu. You were wrong.

The chicken was huge. You tried to smile at the waitress, but you couldn’t even look her in the face, too focused on how the hell you were going to pretend to eat this chicken. Colson sent a look in your direction before giving the waitress a polite, “thank you.”

Once she had left, he glared at you. You looked up once again, “what?” Your voice was quiet.

Colson grumbled, “nothing.” You gave a small pout when he looked away from you, cutting into his food. You decided it was better not to respond to him.

Instead, you returned your attention to the food in front of you. The tossing and turning of your stomach reminded you how disgusting you already felt. You could hear the faintest whispers of the devil in the back of your mind.

You’re gonna eat all that? Think about everything else you’ve consumed already! No wonder you’re so fat.

He’s never gonna stay with someone who eats as much as you do.

You shooed them away, taking your fork and knife in your hand. You cut the chicken into a few small pieces, taking nibbles at them, and pretending to enjoy it. You and Colson had stopped talking, and you could feel his irritation building.

You looked up to see his plate almost half empty, Jesus how could he eat so fast? He met your gaze, glancing down to your plate and scowling. “Why aren’t you eating?”

You looked down, a small sigh escaping your mouth. “I’m just not that hungry, I guess.” You bit your lip, about to continue when he cut you off “I told y-“

“Do you not like it?”

You shook your head, “No, it’s no th-“

Colson let out a frustrated sigh, “well, sorry Y/N. Tried to do something nice for you but apparently even this isn’t good enough for you.”

You wanted to scream at him, “that’s not what this is about you fucking idiot!” But you were in a very nice restaurant and the patrons would not appreciate that at all.

If you kept pushing, it would end up going in that direction, so you decided not to explain yourself. Instead, you forced the food down, showing Colson that you were eating it. He scoffed every time you made a show of putting the fork into your mouth and chewing the chicken.

Every swallow felt like an anchor dropping into your stomach. Your stomach was bubbling like some kind of witch’s brew.

When dessert arrived, you wanted to get up and walk out, but Colson was already on edge and you didn’t want to make it any worse. You both hadn’t spoken much, but you could tell he was getting frustrated with you. It was the worst feeling in the world.

Your stupid insecurities are ruining his life.

You can’t even stop thinking about yourself for one night to let him have a good time?

Talk about selfish.

You pushed the thoughts down, taking a small bite of the apple crème brûlée. It felt like a tipping point, like if you ate anything else you would throw up right then and there.

You placed your spoon down onto your plate, harsher than you had hoped. You mumbled out a quick, “I’ll be right back.” Before standing up and making your way to the restrooms.

Luckily, there was no one inside, though you knew that could change at any moment. You locked yourself in the stall furthest away from the door, crouching down in your heels.

It only took a few moments before the food you had just eaten came up, your vomit filling the toilet bowl. You tried to keep your gags quiet in case anyone were to walk in.

He tries to take you on a nice date and you’re in the bathroom, puking.

Like I said, selfish.

I don’t even know why he stays with you, honestly

You’re not pretty, you’re not very smart, you’re not much of anything at all, really.

You’re a drama queen!

Maybe you should just stop eating for good

Then this wouldn’t be an issue

You don’t know when the tears started, but they were streaming down your face. You grabbed a handful of toilet paper, softly dabbing your face to hopefully clear your skin of any makeup that may have run off.

You flushed the toilet, piecing yourself together haphazardly. You stood up, stumbling out of the stall, and facing yourself in the mirror. Your eyes were slightly puffy, but none of your makeup had smeared, luckily.

Disgusting

You sighed, glancing up to prevent more tears from falling. You put a fake smile on your face, walking out of the restroom and to your table. When Colson saw you, he stood up abruptly. “I already paid, let’s go.” His voice wasn’t loud, but it was harsh enough for you to know he was angry.

He walked in front of you as you made your way to the car. His hand never found yours like it normally would, there was no warmth coming from him, only a cold distance. The car ride to your house was silent. You wanted to say something, but you couldn’t quite find the words. At one point you’d reached out to place your hand on top of his, but he jerked his hand away, his other hand gripping the wheel tighter.

When he finally pulled into your driveway, you sat there for a few moments, studying his face as he looked straight ahead. “Colson,” You whispered.

“Don’t.”

You sighed, your eyes filling with tears again. You hated almost everything about yourself, but you hated when he was mad at you even more.

You don’t deserve him.

You nodded to yourself, opening the door and stepping out of the car. As much as you wanted to explain yourself and beg him to forgive you, you knew what was best for him. If you let him leave now, he wouldn’t have to bear the burden of your problems. He could be free to find something better. Someone better.

So, you went inside, tears falling down your face the entire way in.

Colson almost didn’t catch the glossy look in your eyes, or the red swelling around them. But he did, and it made him feel all sorts of weird inside.

Why did he have to get so mad?

It was just a stupid dinner.

He knew he was being too hard on you, but he was just trying to do something romantic.

Is that too much to ask for?

Apparently so.

But he shook off his thoughts, turning his car off and making his way to your now closed door. Even if he was upset, he needed to make sure you were alright.

When he walked in, the lights were all off, the house very dark and very quiet. You had only gone in a few moments before him, where were you?

His questions were answered by small gasps coming from your guest bathroom, mixed with sobs. He ran to where you were, throwing the door open and turning on the light.

He found you sitting over the toilet, your bile in the bowl. A look of worry immediately flooded his features, and he kneeled down beside you. He wrapped one of his arms around you loosely, his other rubbing your back. You leaned back into his chest, sobs shaking your entire body. “I’m- sorry.” Your words were very choppy, interrupted by your gasps for air.

“It’s okay, baby.” He sighed, resting his chin on the crown of your forehead.

You shook your head, determinately. “I tried,” a sniffle, “really hard.”

His arm on your back joined the one around your waist, rubbing circles into your stomach. You pulled away from the motion, but he kept you firmly in his grasp. “I couldn’t do it.”

Your whispers sounded so weak, so pathetic. Colson wracked his brain for an explanation. This had to be more than just the food not tasting good. Maybe you were sick?

“Shhh, baby. It’s okay. I’m not upset.” He whispered, leaning down to press a soft kiss to your temple. You both sat like that for a while, your chest heaving and his soft words calming you down.

Eventually you were able to collect yourself enough to form coherent thoughts. “I’m sorry I ruined date night.” You mumbled, your hand moving to stop his from their movement.

“It’s okay, babe. You can’t control this shit.” He whispered.

“You shouldn’t have to deal with this shit though!” You shouted as best as you could, your hoarse voice making it sound more like a whine. “If I weren’t so-“ You cut yourself off, wanting to save him the burden of knowledge. If you told him he would either feel disgusted with you and leave or feel sorry for you and stay. You didn’t know which one you were more scared of.

Colson brought his lips to your temple again, “Babe, it’s okay. You should’ve told me you were sick. We could’ve rescheduled.”

His words made you let out a dry laugh, “I’m sick alright.” You mumbled, tears rolling down your eyes again. “But not that kind of sick.” You whispered.

You looked back at your boyfriend, turning so that your entire body was facing him. You could see the confusion in his features. “I want to help you, but I have no idea what’s going on. I can’t read your mind, babe, you gotta tell me.”

You shook your head, looking to the floor. “Trust me, it’s better if you don’t know. You don’t want to know.”

He took your chin in his hand, guiding you up to look at him again, “I do wanna know, Y/N. I wanna help you.”

Your eyes looked everywhere but his, shutting momentarily as more tears fell. You took a deep breath in through your nose, trying to find where to start.

“I have an eating disorder.” You whispered, trying to get the words out as possible so you couldn’t take them back. Colson’s eyes went wide with realization, “I was diagnosed with a purge disorder when I was like, 16. I think it’s morphed into anorexia since then.” Your entire body was shaking with nerves.

He’s gonna hate you now.

You’re disgusting.

Colson grabbed your face with both hands, cradling it gently. “Baby, I’m so sorry. I never should’ve taken you-“

“You didn’t know.” You shut down his thoughts. He shouldn’t blame himself for your problems. “It’s not your fault. I thought I could just suck it up and get through it but, obviously I couldn’t.” You shrugged, letting out a frustrated sigh.

His hands fell from your face, grabbing your hips and lightly dragging you closer to him. He moved your legs to rest on his outstretched ones as he spoke, “I shouldn’t have gotten so mad about it, though. I was so frustrated because I thought you didn’t like it. I was embarrassed because I just wanted to impress you.”

You reached your arms up to wrap around his neck, holding yourself up. “I was very impressed, and it’s not that I didn’t like it. Food is just really hard for me. I’ve gotten so used to eating next to nothing. I didn’t realize how hard it would be to eat like a regular person.” He nodded, a frown on his face. “I’m sorry.” You whispered.

“You don’t have to be sorry; you didn’t do anything wrong. This is just part of who you are.” He looked into your eyes, deeply.

You sighed, “I- I guess. But I didn’t want to have to burden you with all this shit. You shouldn’t have to put up with all this. You deserve better.”

He scrunched his face, “Woah woah woah. Y/N you are not a burden. I told you, this is just part of who you are, and I love who you are. I’m not putting up with anything, I’m accepting you for every part of who you are. I don’t want anyone else; I just need you.”

His words made your heart race. He sure knew how to string lines together. “You love me?” You asked, softly. He’d never said those words to you before. Sure, you had thought them, but you were scared he’d think it was too soon.

He smiled, leaning to kiss your forehead, “yes, you dummy.” He chuckled against your skin.

“I love you.” You whispered. “I’m sorry.”

“Stop saying that.” He mumbled and you sniffled.

Your first thought was to apologize, but you knew he’d stop you in your tracks. “I just don’t want you to feel sorry for me or think I’m weak. I’ve been dealing with this shit for years now.” You paused, a thought crossing your head. You whispered it to yourself before you even realized he would hear, “maybe I am weak.”

“Hey,” he kept your head in place when you started to drift towards the floor, “you are not weak. This just proves how strong you are. You’ve lived with this for how long now? And you’re still fighting. That’s not weakness, babe. That’s strength.”

“Sor-“ You cut yourself off, “If I was really strong, I’d be over this shit now.”

“It’s a disease, baby. It’s just like a broken bone. It’s not gonna get better unless you treat it. You’ve been trying to hide it for so long now, let me help. We can get you a nutritionist, and a therapist, and we’ll stock up on whatever food you can eat, and we’ll work on it together. Whatever you need.”

“Are you sure? That’s a lot of work, Cols. I’m not sure if I’m wor-“

He cut you off, blue eyes staring deep into your own. “You are worth all of this and more. Don’t think for a second that you’re not. You deserve to be happy and healthy and I am gonna be here to support you for as long as you want me here.”

You paused for a moment, taking in his words. “Thank you.” You whispered, “For tonight and for all this. Just, thank you. For everything.”

“I love you.” He pulled you closer to him, hugging you tightly. “Thank you for telling me. I know it wasn’t easy.”

“I love you too, Colson.”

[aarons-main-blog]

I changed my mind, and decided to que this up immediately after posting the first one. I won't be home when you see this because I'm attending a funeral, but tell me what you think of it and I will see you when I get home!

Note: this was made on Google docs mobile, so when I get a chance I will actually use tab instead of just paragraphs.

"Wars, you said you knew the area!"

"I thought I did, but this is sure as hell not the same way I remember! Those ruins we passed back there? Those are completely new to me! This forest? I don't even recognize half of these plants! We should have reached a town hours ago!"

"Hey, stop fighting, you two, or-"

The group Link had been following for the last few hours came to a halt as the one with pink-tipped hair argued with the one with a blue scarf. He couldn't tell if they were a threat yet, they just seemed like lost travelers. Then again, that was the main way the Yiga clan tried to trick him. 

Pinky and Wars kept arguing, until finally the smallest one in rainbow colors seemed to snap. "How about we admit it. We are lost, and just happened to find something that reminded Wars of home. It was NOONE's fault, because we ignored the obvious signs something was wrong. Now, we are lost in the middle of a forest, and unless you have an idea of what we should do, then SHUT UP!"

The group all seemed shocked by his outburst, Link and the rainbow included, and once they all seemed to get over it, the kid apologized. "Sorry, I didn't mean to yell."

The oldest one, probably the leader, said, "No, it's ok. Today has been a long day, and everyone seems on edge. Perhaps we should set up camp early, does that sound good to everyone?"

The group nodded collectively, and started to set up in the clearing that could barely fit all of them. The one in a green tunic and no pants volunteered for the night's first watch, and while it wouldn't be for a while, they seemed relaxed a bit more by the fact someone was willing to do it. 

Link, who had been hiding a good distance away from them, stood up. He got a stealth potion that would last him a few hours at least ready, then decided he would investigate that night.

As the sun set, an awful smell enveloped the forest. "Legend, what did you do?!"

"I don't know! It was fine a minute ago!"

"It's smoking! How did you burn SOUP of all things?!"

"I didn't burn it, it just got too hot!"

"Because you ****ed up, Legend! That's literally how things burn up!"

"Wind, watch your mouth."

Link had just come back from following the path the group of strangers had taken, looking to see if they dropped anything interesting, when he heard the commotion. It smelled like burning hair or that one shrine he had found with the awful cook. Maybe they were cousins? 

As Link got closer to get a better look, he saw four people standing around a large cooking pot with a brown/green liquid with chunks in it. Pathetic. Are all of them as bad cooks as that one? Link was amazed they had survived however long they had been traveling. 

Pinkey poked the 'soup' with a wooden ladle. "It's still edible, look, the vegetables seem cooked enough."

 "With all due respect, I don't know if I would want to eat that," the kid in a blue shirt said with a grimace. "I don't know if anyone else would either."

The old one took the ladle and used it to try a small sip of what they were calling a soup, and his face scrunched up immediately. 

"Uh, Time?" The blue kid tapped the man's shoulder. 

The man swallowed the drink, coughed, then said, "It is… certainly better than last time."

A few of the others gave their opinions, from encouraging to neutral, before deciding it was better than nothing. 

None of them looked that happy about it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After what theoretically could have been called dinner, the one in the green tunic, which Link had identified as being named "Hyrule," started circling around the camp, gradually making them larger and larger before returning close and starting again. Near the middle of the third round, Link drank his stealth potion and snuck into the campsite. 

There was a young adult in tan with a tall belt, there was a boy in blue(wind), there was a kid in rainbow, there was a young adult with a wolf pelt on his shoulders, still on in his sleep for some reason, there was one in red with pink hair tips(legend), and then there was the leader. Link got a good look at him. He had a fancy set of armour, a big sword, a bad eye, but the strangest thing was he had familiar markings covering his face. They were almost the same… 

As the ones Link saw in nearly every mirror, looking right back at himself. 

"Time?"

Link turned towards the voice to see the one called Hyrule looking at him. He had to play this right. "Yes?"

"Oh, thank the goddess. What are you up to?"

"I couldn't sleep, so I was going to see if you wanted off early." This was dangerous. If he realized the real Time was sleeping soundly next to him, he would wake up all the others, and then he'd have eight grumpy travelers armed to the teeth on his trail in seconds. 

"You sure that's ok with you?"

"Yes, get some rest."

"Thanks, Time," the boy said with a smile. "I will."

Link somewhat directed Hyrule towards the opposite side of where Time was. He was extremely lucky the fire was ruining the boy's night vision. 

"Time?"

Link stopped and turned his head a bit. "Yeah?"

There was a pause. "Thank you for being here for us."

Link smiled. "You don't have to mention it," mimicking the somewhat fancy way he had heard Time use words. "Goodnight."

Hyrule mumbled it back, seemingly exhausted from the travel. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next morning, Hyrule woke up feeling well rested. The birds were singing a song only they knew, the trees provided shade from the early morning sun, the wind rustled leaves and bushes softly, and a nice smell emanated from the cooking pot. 

Wait, did someone cook something edible? Hyrule shot up, feeling excited to see what had made someone unlock their inner cook. 

"Hey, mornin, Hyrule!" 

"Goodmorning, Wind! What's cooking?"

Wind was grinning like an idiot. "No idea, but none of us made it, that's for sure! Four woke up and saw it cooking, then woke up the rest of us, except for you and sky. Time says you didn't wake him up for his shift, so we thought you could use some re-"

Hyrule was confused. "Wait, what? Run that by me one more time." 

Wind's grin fell just a little bit, before coming back up. "Four woke up first, saw something was cooking, and woke everyone but you and sky because we thought you must have kept watch the whole night. Is that not what happened?"

"Yeah, Time said he couldn't sleep last night, so he took over the watch early for me."

Time, who had been listening in, said "I think I would know my sleep schedule better than you would. You didn't wake me up last night, and I didn't wake myself up, that's for certain."

"Then who-"

Four hit the pot a few times. "Breakfast is ready, guys!"

The questions could wait. Nobody had had a good meal for at least a week or two, so they were excited to try the mysterious meal.

It. Was. Delicious!

After discussion, it was determined to be a mushroom, meat and rice based meal. The meat used was probably venison, and a high quality type at that. It was served with some mushrooms nobody recognized but everybody loved, and a strange rice they couldn't find an exact comparison of.

Idle conversation was of generally positive things and how beautiful the world was. All of their problems seemed far away, and the day promised to be a great one. As the last of the food was eaten up, and the bowl was starting to be wiped as clean as it would get, Twilight brought up the question on everyone's mind. 

"I wonder who made this for us."

"Maybe it was a ghost!" Wind exclaimed.

"Maybe it was a passing traveler?" Four said at the same time.

Legend laughed. "It was not a ghost, you idiot!"

"You don't know that," Wind huffed. "I met a ghost once, she was nice!"

"You did NOT meet a ghost!"

"Yeah I did!"

"Cut it out you two," Time said with his signature 'stop' look. "Whoever did it, they must have been a nice person. Don't argue about things this good, ok?"

"Ok!" Wind said. Legend just scoffed. 

Nobody noticed the person sitting on top of a tree, fiddling a strange ocarina.

I hope this was ok! I will be the first to admit my writing style isn't the best, but I think this is one of my better works at the moment. Comments and criticism is appreciated, and I may edit this if I find stupid things I want to change/fix. I should be home Friday, probably Thursday afternoon. Anyway, see you next time!

[ghostiewriter]

TW ED

ok so this is definitely me projecting my own issues on shit but i saw the ask about summer and adhd and eating disorders and i was wondering if u could do a concept of her and dean around that topic🥺 no pressure though if it’s too dark or triggering

Okay I really don’t think I did this justice and I can only apologise for that. But for those suffering from an eating disorder, just know you are loved and I hope you find the help you need and deserve because you are incredible besties❤️

It wasn’t completely obvious at first.

No one blinked an eye when Summer said she had eaten earlier or that she was still full from before. No one questioned it because what reason did she have to lie? Especially for something like her meals?

Or maybe it wasn’t obvious at first because even Summer didn’t realise she was doing it. At least, not on purpose all the time.

Sometimes Summer just didn’t want to eat, she would rather just drown herself in fashion magazines and blogs until she could barely keep her eyes open and would end up passing out at her desk. Sometimes Summer just didn’t want to hurt their cook’s feelings when she saw what had been made and the mere thought of the rubbery texture of mushrooms or the crunch of celery made her skin crawl. But maybe sometimes Summer didn’t even realise it had been hours since she eat. Maybe sometimes Summer didn’t remember that it had been three days since she had a proper meal and the incessant snacking was the only thing keeping her going.

But Dean noticed it, and he kicked himself for not noticing earlier.

“Hey, I’m gonna go grab burritos for me and Nick, you want one?” He asked, popping his head into the room. He found Summer lounging on her bed, feet swinging back and forth as she read something on her laptop.

“Hm,” She glanced away from her laptop and smiled. “Nah, I had a big breakfast.”

Dean frowned. “You had toast.”

“Not all of us are big muscular athletes, Dean.” Summer retorted with a small snort.

“Yeah, but you ate toast like seven hours ago.” He pointed out to her.

“I—” Summer paused, looking at the time on her laptop screen. “Oh…I could’ve sworn I had ate only an hour ago.” She murmured, almost like she forgot he was there.

“You sure?” Dean asked softly and Summer looked a bit taken back.

“What?”

Dean glanced down the hall before slipping into her room, closing the door behind and settling down beside her on the bed. She had to shuffle over to give him room.

“I don’t want you to take this the wrong way,” He started, suddenly wishing through his little time of research he had notes on…how you even bring up something like this. “I just care about you, you know that, right?”

Summer frowned, but nodded regardless. “Yeah, you’ve always been a bit of a worrier.”

Dean turned to her with a serious expression on his face. “Summer, are you…are you avoiding meals on purpose?”

Summer didn’t say anything.

“Summer…” His voice sounded pained.

“I…it’s just…” She could hear her heart thumping in her ears, distracting her from the words she was trying to say. “N-Not always…but…I…”

“Hey, shhhhh,” He quickly wrapped his arms around her, not even thinking twice before bringing her into a protective embrace. “I got you, don’t cry, please. I got you, Summer.”

They stayed like that for a few minutes, neither one saying anything or moving away. Summer taking the time to calm herself down, let her heartrate return to normal and her vision no longer be blurred by tears. Whilst Dean closed his eyes at the sound of her sobs, no sound having ever pained him so badly.

“Dean.” Her whispered voice finally broke the silence.

“Yeah?”

“I’m sorry.”

He squeezed her tighter. “You know it’s not healthy, Summer.”

Her voice was so soft. “I know.”

“You’re not alone,” He told her, in a soft but firm voice. “You’re not alone. I’m here and mum and dad and Nick are here. We’re here for you.”

“I—” She took a deep breath. “Can we…I mean, can—”

“We don’t have to tell them,” He told her and felt her visibly relax in his arms. “Not right now, at least. But we will have to tell them eventually. Until then, I’m here for you. Whenever you need me, we are gonna fight this together, okay?”

“Okay.” There was a small pause before she continued. “I love you.”

He grinned, pressing a small kiss to the crown of her head. “I love you too.”

“I know.”

“Little shit.”

“Learned from my brother.”

“Nick is a little shit too, isn’t he?”

“Touché.”

[still-a-morosexual-help]

OBEY ME! LESSON 49 DETAILED SUMMARY + THEORIES

One locked lesson

Mammon, Luke & MC are visiting Diavolo’s hotel. Mammon talks about wanting to book a suite and have a party, Luke says he doesn’t like the devildom opening businesses in the human world cause he’s scared they’ll take it over completely. Barbatos says that Diavolo is only interested in coexisting in peace & if he’s gonna snitch to Michael he should tell him their actual intentions. Luke says he’s not a tattletale Mammon vehemently disagrees with that. Barbatos reveals that Diavolo & Levi have started staying up till dawn gaming together (I’m so happy they’re friends!). Mammon said he never knew that Levi previously had issues against Diavolo. When Luke asks where Diavolo is Barbatos tells him he’s out on a date with Lucifer. Mammon asks about Barbatos’ choice of human clothes and MC says he looks really good in it. He says the look he was going for is ‘tea leaf importer’. In a private lounge Barbatos serves them fairy ring tea which surprises Mammon & Luke. In the Devildom on rare occasions small sparkling golden flowers grow in a ring rather than the more usual mushrooms, and the teas is supposed to smell like those flowers. He says despite what the ring is made of there’s a legend they form when fairies dance in a circle. Luke says the tea smells and tastes amazing and MC asks if fairies are real. Barbatos says fairies in the human world are supposedly extinct and us humans are really fucking up the ecosystem huh

Mammon seems really disappointed by that and when MC asks why he says that treasure can be found near fairies, leprechauns are also related to fairies btw. Barbatos says there’s still a chance there are fairies somewhere in the human realm – there are rumours about fairy rings made of flowers in the human realm which can only be caused by fairies whereas mushroom fairy rings have a scientific explanation. And that there are rumours that those flowers can be used to make a rare sweet. Obviously Mammon & Luke are excited about finding fairies for their own reasons (AND is this gonna be a Mammon & Luke lesson!??? I desperately need that) and MC says lol good luck with that anyway byeeeee~ Mammon & Luke immediately strongarm MC into coming along. Barbatos tells them to bring some flowers back and he’ll make tea for them out of it. Luke & Mammon briefly argue about whether they’re after sweets or money, and Luke wonders where they might even start looking. Mammon suggests going to a library to find out what they can and Luke is surprised Mammon suggested that to which Mammon gets annoyed.

Mammon suggests splitting up to be more efficient and Luke is surprised ‘efficient’ is part of Mammon’s vocabulary. MC can go with either of the boys. With Luke; they find books about angels and demons, including a picture of Michael but nothing about fairies. Luke says the picture doesn’t capture how amazing Michael really is. MC can say A.) that Luke seems to really love Michael. He says everyone loves Michael before remembering the brothers and saying they’re the only ones who don’t (no offense but everything I hear about Michael has made me highly suspicious of him too – I’ll get into that later). B.) MC asks how Michael’s been doing lately and Luke says the way they worded it made it sound like they know him personally. But he says it’s understandable that they’re curious when Michael’s the greatest angel to exist (how can you say that when Simeon is literally raising you!?). He says Michael is till sad about what happened with the brothers and seems to regret it and that though their portraits are no longer in the Celestial palace you can find Michael standing and staring at the empty spot looking lost time and time again – that though he doesn’t say it, he misses them (I’LL GET INTO IT). Luke says that the brothers are happy in their new home and have forgotten the celestial realm and Michael and that after meeting them Luke acknowledges that they have a FEW good qualities but whenever he remembers Michael standing under that empty spot and how the brothers don’t even stop to think about how Michael feels or to look at things from Michael’s perspective he gets pissed off (do…do you think Luke knows about Lilith…..I – I highly doubt it because the circumstances behind her death and everything we’ve seen and heard about the celestial realm so far makes me feel like the brothers were completely justified to leave it all behind). With Mammon; He finds a book about Angels, Demons, Fairies and their worlds – though it’s mostly about angels and angel!Lucifer. Mammon asks where the part about him is and MC says they’d love to hear about his time as an angel. He says he was really talented and that Lucifer recommended him to be a Cherubim (so the others as angels said that angel!Mammon could do anything he set his mind to and we’ve seen that despite what his brothers say Mammon actually has a pretty vast array of skills and can really step up and be the responsible big brother when it’s needed so am I the only one who feels like Mammon’s that ‘gifted’ kid in highschool who got burnt out and then said fuck it and decided to stop trying? And now everyone looks at him shakes their head and asks wtf happened to him? Solmare gave me a blank canvas of a character to project on to and instead I go and choose Mammon :))) I’m in pain). Michael & Raphael treated Mammon like he was a problem child but Lucifer saw his potential (GIVE ME THEIR BACKSTORY!). MC can ask A.) If he was sad to leave the Celestial Realm. He looks surprised and then thoughtful and distant and says he never thought about it. He says dwelling on the past isn’t his thing but if he had to pick he’d say he didn’t miss it. But he doesn’t hate it and or like he never wants to go back and that he doesn’t hold a grudge (okay so usually during a Mammon centric lesson I write this after I finish the whole lesson instead of one by one after each chapter like I usually do and I’m gonna tell you things happen that show that he might’ve been unconsciously lying about the grudge thing). He says he doesn’t know how his brothers feel and that they maybe less happy with the celestial realm than he is (calling back to the grudge thing we know Mammon tends to bottle things up emotionally, specially when it’s things that hurt him, we also know that right after they fell Mammon was the one who took care of everyone so I think it’s very likely while the others had their emotional fallout about Falling and Lilith and being Demons and Satan’s birth Mammon just never got the chance as he was taking care of their well being and I have this whole fic floating in my head about it let’s see if I put it into words). He says even if they wanted to it’s not like they could go back )  B.) If he loved Lucifer back then. Mammon goes Loved!? LOVED!? -ED!? PAST TENSE!? I still love him and fjeodkkfnak BABY! (love that angel!Mammon refused to admit he loved Lucifer while demon!Mammon was like fuck yeah I love him what’dya think!?). Mammon then blushes and then tells MC not to tell Lucifer cause he’ll get a ‘I knew it’ look and grin like he was self-satisfied. Given how happy Lucifer became the last two times Mammon admitted to caring about him and how in the recent lessons Lucifer said he didn’t think his brothers love him I really want them to tell Lucifer. In the end they don’t find anything. Mammon wants to quit. Luke doesn’t want to, he wants to see Michael’s face when he eats one of the Legendary sweets. Mammon gets annoyed saying that Luke’s always going on about Michael and asking if he’s worth it (NO GRUDGE HMMMMMM?!) Luke gets really pissed in return. Mammon laughs and tells him to cool down and that despite being a demon he’s being honest and asks why a ‘goody-two shoes angel’ so pissed (no grudge huh? I mean it’s miniscule rn but everything’s way too complicated for Mammon to be just over it). Solomon interrupts them and tells them to stop shouting. Okay so first off starting from S2 Michael’s being brought up a LOT and I’m pretty sure MC spoke with as well and nearly met him and he said he’ll have to meet them on a later day. S3’s going into depth about the Celestial Realm and Michael’s getting way more mentions and they’ve started bringing up Raphael as well and at this point I’m 100% sure they’re gonna actually introduce them as new characters? Maybe by the end of the season? And I’d love this cause I need new dynamics and to learn more about the brothers’ past and the celestial realm but it also sucks cause I have such a clear vision of what they look like and ik solmare’s gonna destroy that. ANYWAY I don’t think they’ll introduce “bad guys” to the story given that this is a dating sim at the end of the day and Michael & Raphael will probably wanna bang MC too but with what they’ve given so far the Celestial Realm and the higher up angels seem very morally dubious? We know that Michael as an angel gave out punishments that were worse than Lucifer as a demon – Mammon saying he still shakes when remembering them thousands of years later. We know they were against mixing with humans and demons – enough that they were willing to kill off an angel for healing a human. We know they supported the war with the demons and were not actively looking for a peaceful end to it unlike Diavolo (to the point that even Lucifer one of the highest angel in ranking was surprised by the notion of peace). We know their rules were much more strict than that of the Devildom and Raphael acted as somewhat of an enforcer and he considered human parties immoral. We know they highly looked down on the demons and considered them pure evil & below them despite not really knowing anything about them. And sure all of these facts are things that happened when the brothers were still in the celestial realm and I bet they’ve changed after thousands of years and are more open minded, but have they changed enough? The way ‘Michael’ spoke to MC when he called the brothers wicked despite not really knowing what they are like as demons, despite the fact that ‘wicked’ doesn’t cover what the brothers are at all and that there are probably humans who are worse people than them, that he thought MC would be wicked too just because the brothers liked them, the fact that Luke still had these beliefs that all demons were evil and terrible despite having never met a demon, which were the same beliefs angel!Lucifer had when he met Diavolo thousands of years later, the fact the angels still have a very strict idea of what exactly an angel should be like and enforced those ideas on the brothers during the angel event to the point that after they were back to normal they all freaked out. All makes the angels seem highly…..um? questionable. Also luke said Michael missed the brother, but does Michael actually miss them or does he miss the perfect angel versions of them? We know in the celestial realm the brothers had to repress a lot of their urges, likes and even small parts of their inherent personalities to be accepted/to not be threatened to be kicked out (ex: Mammon supressing his pranks/more playful/mischievous side in the celestial realm vs being comfortable enough to fully express that side despite Lucifer’s punishments in the devildom) to the point that they had a secret room they’d escape to just so they could skip work/hang out/relax, we know angels still see demons as evil beings and probably don’t still accept them despite the peace, we know that Michael’s view of the brothers as ‘perfect angels’ completely strips them of any identifiable characteristics even if you were to compare them to what they were like when they were really angels. So when luke says Michael misses them I feel like he doesn’t miss them he misses them as these perfect angel versions of themselves that never really existed. If this season is about getting MC’s stars will next season be about getting Michael and Raphael to accept the brothers for how they truly are? More interdimensional therapy sessions? Does this make sense? Talk to me

Solomon says he doesn’t know what happened to the fairies but that they’d have more luck finding them if they went out and looked deep in places free from human influence than looking for info in a human library. Mammon says Solomon should change his name to the “not so wise” & Solomon says it’s not like he came up with his nickname in the first place. Luke has the idea to ask Crowe for help. When Mammon asks Levi about his falling out with Crowe Levi says though they aren’t friends anymore he’s still useful. MC asks crowe where they can find fairies and they find out about rumours near Lake Io Lanthe. Though they can only get there and back within a day with a private jet. Mammon says it’s not like they can use their own wings to fly in the human world either and I’M!!!!!!? would Mammon have had to carry MC? Have they seen the brothers flying in the devildom? Has anyone carried them and flown? In the end they decide on an overnight train ride. Levi says the “kids” should probably first get permission from the “adults.” MC who’s a fully independent grown adult doesn’t need permission.

Simeon happily agrees as long as they can find someone to cover Luke’s shifts in the café. Luke asks MC which of the brothers they should ask, there are 6 options and for each the 3 of them imagine the scenario that would take place. 1.) Levi; Simeon getting steadily more and more irritated while Levi tries to win a game instead of working till black-purple smoke is rising out from Simeon even as he smiles sweetly and calls Levi. 2.) Lucifer; looking deeply disappointed with crossed arms says “So, are you going to tell me your order or not? Hurry up. I don’t have all day. I have (list of café related chores) French chocolate cake with hot cocoa? Are you insane? Who in their right mind would pair chocolate cake with hot chocolate?” why is this so funny!?? 3.) Satan; Fully serious “Simeon, table two wants an earl grey. And a pretty kitty special to go with it.” Simeon, “WTF is a pretty kitty special!?” The pretty kitty special is paw shaped pancakes and Simeon thinks they’re cute. In this universe no customers or Levis are harmed. 4.) Asmo; Asmo starts almost instantly hitting on the customer. “You know I don’t usually do this but how about I sit down with you for tea?” Luke says while bright red, “ABSOLUTELY NOT! He’ll turn the Angel’s Halo into a different sort of place.” And umm Luke buddy what exactly were you thinking of here… 5.) Beel; Simeon: Hey have you seen the BLTs? Beel: *actively munching away* No. Can’t find them? Want me to help? Simeon: …Nevermind 6.) Belphie; Orders food for himself from Simeon during a lull in the customers and takes a nap before Simeon even gives it to him. In the end they decide on Satan.

They find Satan at the pizza place watching his tab with a serious expression, Luke wonders if he’s learning new things about the human world (languages, the economy, etc) Mammon says that’s the face he makes when he watches cat videos. When Mammon tries calling him he pretends he doesn’t know them until Mammon’s yelling his name and he can no longer ignore them (Wonder how humans feel about some buy yelling ‘SATAN’ in the middle of a diner). Satan immediately refuses to work at the café cause he’s busy (watching cat videos) until MC lies through their teeth and says that Simeon wants to turn the café into a cat café. Luke jumps on board instantly and starts supporting MC’s claims further adding that as a cat lover they need Satan’s advice and that working part time at the café will give him a better understanding to how the business is normally run. He then agrees to help. (Luke none of that lying seems really angelic…). At the café Satan immediately goes “okay, so… let’s talk cats”. And Simeon’s like????????

At home Lucifer’s still not back from his date & they tell others about their plans for the trip. Asmo says if he had a choice he’d like to meet Narcissus… Mammon tries to play off the fact that he’s nervous about asking permission from Lucifer and Belphie tells them to watch out for Banshees – a type of fairy - when they get there (I first heard about banshees as a little kid and they freaked the shit outta me, gave me way more anxiety than I already had). Satan says there are lots of types of fairies including those that make you fall in love. Mammon is way more interested in them than in Banshees – Asmo tells him he’s being a pervert. Lucifer arrives after dinner and they follow him to his room. Lucifer says a quiet lake might give Mammon the chance for some self-reflection and personal growth (pretty sure Lucifer needs that too ngl) and it’ll give Lucifer some peace and quiet but also who the fuck’s gonna pay for you huh!? Mammon tries to play the “my favourite older brother” card. Lucifer disagrees and they decide to gamble on it – if Mammon wins he gets to go and if Lucifer wins Mammon gets bathroom cleaning duty for a week. Lucifer says Mammon’ll just cheat so MC volunteers to play and Mammon gets really happy that they’d do that for him, saying he feels like crying. Lucifer agrees except if they lose BOTH of them get bathroom duty. MC has to guess if the card Lucifer draws is odd or even. Even’s correct and they get to go without a fuss. If they pick even they lose.

If they lose the next chapter starts with Mammon crying in MC’s room about MC and Luke being allowed to go and not him and how with MC gone bathroom duty is all his, MC says they’ll do anything to get him to forgive them and he blushes and asks them to stay with him till he allows them to leave and that means they’re gonna be at it all night…. ALL RIGHT ANYWAY Luke then texts them saying he’s impressed that they managed to convince Lucifer to let Mammon go and that Lucifer had actually sent Luke three tickets for “Mammon’s journey of Personal Growth” and Lucifer’s such a good dad sometimes I can’t deal with this BS. Mammon immediately runs off to thank Lucifer and you can then hear lucifer screaming at Mammon to get out and stop hugging him cause he’s in the shower and I love them both so much I NEED them being soft to each other more and the only reason Mammon ended up being the avatar of greed is cause Lucifer probably spoilt him rotten growing up *cough*Lucifer’s B’day Present To Him*cough*. If they win the next chapter starts in Mammon’s room where he’s asking crowe, who’s apparently been borrowed from Levi, how much money he could make selling fairy ring flowers, he then asks MC to ask crowe something too. They can ask crowe about tomorrow’s weather or tease Mammon by either asking crowe how to control Mammon or asking if they’re compatible with Mammon. Mammon blushes but Crowe says they’re fairly compatible and if they can control Mammon’s self-destructive tendencies and how he puts money before everything they may last – mammon says all of that is wrong (I mean we have seen that he actually puts MC before money and material goods quite a few times so yeah…). He says they already know how well they work together better than anyone in all the 3 worlds and they don’t need anyone to tell them that and MC kisses him. Mammon blushes and says “yeah ik Luke’s gonna be with us but let’s try and get our own room to share cause this is the one chance to get time alone away from the others so we can have all kinds of fun. Though we can still have plenty of fun rn” and then he calls them closer and the screen fades to black :) It later opens to screams being heard from inside the house somewhere.

[goldemas1244]

Heyyyy I have a question :3

Do you have any headcanon/s for these character : Scraptrap, Scrap Baby, Lady Dimistrecu, the three daughter of Lady D, Heisenberg and/or Molten Freddy ? :3

You don't have to do all the proposition, you can choose what character you want to do :3

Have a good day/evening and stay safe ! :3

*Cracks knuckles* \(^v^)/

You already know I'm doing all of them! Thank you for the ask! Headcanons under the cut!

FNaF6

Scraptrap

He loves rice and would do anything to get his paws on it. Fortunately, the pizzeria is quite close to a Chinese restaurant so rice is easy to get.

He orders a rice-based menu at least three times a week, so the owners aren't at all that surprised to see a tuxedo-clad zombie-rabbit come in and ask for their signature fried rice with buttered lobster on the side.

Since he like to dine-in there, he usually asks Michael to give him a bath in exchange for pizzeria improvements. Michael usually shrugs and gives him a well-deserved bubble bath and his tuxedo.

He likes it when Michael gives him head pats and rubs. It makes him feel loved and appreciated.

He has a pet pigeon named Fernando Buschmann. It's German and likes to listen to the violin.

He likes ASMR and memes. ASMR makes him go feral with murderous intent while memes make him question the modern generation.

He has social media accounts, all named "Willton-Moldover". He usually posts cosplays and furry art on them and has 93 followers on his Reddit profile, 1.5 million followers on his Instagram, 550 followers on his Tumblr, 35 on his Snapchat, and 3.95 million on his TikTok.

He also has a YouTube channel with 10.784 million subscribers called "Willton-Gameover". He plays videogames one-handed and roasts popular YouTubers and famous people. He would never roast Keanu Reeves though, because Keanu Reeves is precious bean.

Due to his popularity he gets a lot of hate mail and private pics. He doesn't like them at all so he blackmails the people who post them. And if the media and police are involved? Well, he has a strong fanbase that's not going down as well as a good alibi so that works out well for him.

Yes, his fanbase also knows of the Fazbear Murders, and he admits to it but frankly, he's shown them the approving ghost kids (who've bonded and gamed with him) so that's no big deal. Only Cassidy hates him, but it's usually constipated anger.

He's bisexual and has an ENORMOUS crush on one of his favourite game characters, Karl Heisenberg. Something about that man reminds him of himself and Henry, although he's not sure what. Still, don't let that distract you from the fact that he owns a nude Karl Heisenberg body pillow, CAPCOM official.

Scrap Baby

Her favourite Monster High doll is Draculaura. She doesn't understand how pink goes well with black but oh boy, pink goes so well with black.

She knows how to skateboard like a pro. Despite her weight, her trusty skateboard still stands and, if she falls, she's always got her skates to spare. She likes to impress the boys at the skatepark with her ability to perform even the most difficult of moves with ease.

She's subscribed to fifteen different tabloid subscriptions. She likes to read them and criticize the stupidity of the human race, like her father. Hey, it's hereditary.

The lights in her boobies glow in the dark. They also glow whenever she gets tired.

She likes reading furniture and gardening catalogues. She's judgy of the prices though and usually becomes a full-on critic with Lefty listening.

She owns a crab named Mr. Tootie. No I will not elaborate on the name. I'll only tell you that it's taken a liking to kazoos and party favours.

She's listed as the No. 1 Best Fan of her father's social media accounts. Michael's in nineteenth place but don't worry, he's as emotionless as a mushroom.

She likes to make origami lotuses. She's such a pro at it that she's even got a mini-stall at the pizzeria: 1 lotus for 50 cents. It's a lucrative business, and it's still growing. Oh, and she switches to other origami works of art every week such as origami guns and origami nine-tailed foxes.

She's the Restaurant Rescue manager. Usually she saves kids from trouble. For this reason, yes, she's commonly seen in the pizzeria itself. Kids love her though the claw worries the more irksome parents.

She's a professional Karen dealer. Karen comes to see the manager? She's hypnotically talented in weaving her words through the toughest of craniums so don't be surprised if a Karen walks out with a new viewpoint of life.

She performs on stage on the occasion, which usually gets her a lot of fan love. She cherishes everything good they give but ignores the problematic everythings. Problematic stuff? Oh, she's good friends with the police chief.

Molten Freddy

He loves noodles. Give him a bowl of ramen and he'll shut up for the entire night. Enter him in a noodle-eating competition and his high metabolism rate means absolutely non-stop spaghetti.

He misses Bon-Bon very much. To the point where he's even tried to make a scrap version of him. Sadly, it doesn't work. He cried that day.

He dies inside whenever he finds out there's a spaghetti shortage in Utah. Poor Molten.

He's a bit wonky, but if he tries to play with you or get into your personal space, don't get mad at him! He's just lonely and wants someone to talk to and play with.

He likes to play Exploding Kittens. It's the only card game he's good at. It's also the only card game he owns.

He sees Helpy as a little brother and boops his nose on a daily basis. He also likes to reenact The Lion King with him (It's the ciiiiiircle of liiiiiife~). Hopefully Helpy doesn't mind.

He knows a lot of jokes in a lot of languages. So German-speaking Molten Freddy wouldn't be too far away from expectation. His favourite jokes are in French though; the wordplay is just immaculate.

He's good in French, English, German, Russian, and Malay. He's currently learning Japanese because he's a mega weeb.

His favourite cartoon is Charlie and Lola. He just likes to see the sibling shenanigans as it somehow reminds him of the good old days.

His favourite shows would be prankster shows. He especially loves the ones that give him new and creative ideas. He doesn't like the scary ones though. They make him feel unsafe and give him anxiety.

Surprisingly, he has a distinct taste for opera. He can modulate the remnants of his voice box to perfectly sing I Am The Very Model Of A Modern Major-General. This both pisses off and impresses Henry to an extent.

Resident Evil 8

Lady Dimitrescu

She might act like the opposite but she really loves Heisenberg as her little brother. His determination, strength, speed, dexterity, and workaholic nature impresses her, who can't even fit through a doorway. She sometimes wishes she's as short as him too.

She's an avid collector of glass, porcelain, and anything fragile. It's a good reason to always be careful where you tread in her lair. She'll make you swallow every last shard if you don't.

She's an avid romance fanatic and is very loving towards the romance novels she owns. All those books you see in the in-game library? They're her collection of lesbian romances that she's collected over the past decades.

She doesn't like hats and prefers to stick to the one she wears in-game. She DOES have a collection of hats though. Last anyone counted, there were over fifty, one or two for each decade she's lived through.

She files her nails on a constant basis and owns an ornately decorated nail-clipper. Hygeine is of the utmost importance. She doesn't want to be compared to that filthy Heisenberg.

Despite her size and carefulness she keeps losing her stuff. Over the course of a week she could misplace three wine glasses, two reading glasses, and fifteen bottles of wine.

She's an expert at dodgeball and golf and even owns a lifetime access to the most prolific Country Club in Romania. With permission from Mother Miranda she goes there every year for the yearly party. It's one of the times she gets to see modernity (and Ed Sheeran) at its finest.

She loves bands from the 1920s and 1940s. However, she gets bored of them occasionally and switches them to something more modern, like Ed Sheeran. Seriously though, what is up with mums and Ed?

She's into executions and torture methods. So it's no surprise that she's a HUGE fan of Horrible Histories; even if she can't watch the show, she'll binge-read the books over and over again. She's even had the chance to encounter (and receive an autograph from) Terry Deary. They have sworn a bond not to tell anybody about this.

She loves exotic animals like anacondas and jaguars. She may or may not have owned a 10ft long Saltwater Crocodile (which was also about 5ft wide).

She's an incredible physicist and mathematician. She's also created many original formulae but unsurprisingly, she doesn't tell anyone about them, for fear that either more people may know of her, or that she may be wrong.

Dimitrescu Babes

They can devour an entire human being in mere seconds as flies. It's sort of like the scarab beetles in The Mummy movies. However, unlike the beetles, they are able to strip the bones as well. They leave nothing behind.

They all know how to play the piano with varying levels of success. Daniela can already play professionally while Bela is still stuck on Grade 5.

They love to listen to their mother when she tells them stories. Gotta hand it to 'em, when you're a fly, you know how to enjoy life in its most simple of moments.

They all love being around the hunky Soldats of Uncle Karl. Fortunately, they don't know of the rebellious plan to conquer Miranda.

Bela is bisexual, Cassandra is asexual and pansexual, and Daniela is demisexual.

It gets hard when you're a fly during the summer. If it's not the lizards, spiders, and other predators, it's the heat. Because of this, despite the material waste, they have invented the world's first blood-powered air conditioner.

The three girls have never ever ever touched a stove or oven in their life. They HAVE touched the hot end of an iron though. A good reason to not touch a bloody oven. Alcina has though, but doesn't tell them that.

They love puppies! Uncle Karl brought them a baby labrador. For the rest of the week Alcina had lost quite a bit of favour from them. Not that they minded of course. IT'S A PUPPY.

They don't like snow one bit. Not just because it's cold, but because it's too white. Too bright. Too shiny. They just can't focus on their prey!

They like to go over to Auntie Donna to play with Angie. Well, you know what they say, crazies attract the crazies, and the crazy has attracted the crazies.

They also like to go to Uncle Moreau's because he's the only one in the village with a PS4. Usually they'd spend about three-quarters of a day playing his games and eating his cheese.

Karl Heisenberg

He owns a dark blue armchair named Junkyard. Despite the name, he loves it dearly because it was a gift from Alcina for his twenty-first birthday. It became part of his final transformation too. Right under the hat.

He's a little blind in the right eye, much to his annoyance. It was a minor accident with Sturm; another reason for him to hate the uncontrollable wretch. He'll never live that day down.

Somehow, he sees better in the dark, which is why he wears such tinted glasses. He also wears them to hide his expressions, since, more often than not, he tends to end up wearing his heart on his sleeve, and his emotions in his eyes.

He's under a lot of pressure so it's no surprise that he breaks down in his factory when he knows he's alone. And by break down I mean crumple into an exhausted heap on the floor. Not even his Soldat Jet squad can wake him up until he's had a reasonable eight hours of rest.

He bathes once a day, every evening, but only three times a week. Perfume, tobacco, and cologne keep care of the rest.

He's the only Lord with a daily contact with the outside world due to his electrical abilities. Don't tell Miranda, but he can electrically CONNECT TO GOOGLE AND THE ENTIRE INTERNET IN GENERAL. He likes to play funny YouTube cat videos in his head when Miranda's having a boring meeting. It's also how he finds out that Chris is a boulder-punching asshole.

He does stimming! He likes to tap his fingers on his desk and the metal rails in his factory. He also buys stim toys from the Duke and keeps them in a well-kept box. His favourite is a non-ripping squishable toy duck. He also sings to chill out.

He's absolutely in the Five Nights at Freddy's franchise, and may have once believed in the pizzeria's existence. Come on, he's a mutated Overlord with magical magnet powers. Children souls stuck inside animatronics isn't too far-fetched of an idea. His favourite characters are the Funtimes and the Scraps, mainly because of the blueprint complexity. He HAS tried to replicate the animatronics in his spare time, but he's usually too busy with his Soldats so the project gets scrapped. He loves The Living Tombstone's songs and remixes though.

He doesn't like William Afton at all (though he marvels at his survivability). William's nature and habits remind him of Mother Miranda. He DOES however enjoy Michael Afton and often thinks how it would be absolutely amazing to have that resilient being in his Soldat army.

He's scared of what lurks below the watery depths and fire. Ironic because his brother is a literal fish and he works in one of the most hazardous fire-conducting environments. He's also scared of heights, though he doesn't get airsick.

He once died due to a killing electric shock whilst working on Sturm. It's the only time he's felt that sort of pulsing agony and also the first time he's had the confirmation that yes, Hell is real and yes, he'll end up in quite a dark pit in it. Or it could've been an electric dream, who knows? Anyways his soul apparently ran towards the opposite direction of the flames and he woke up alive after the passing of FIVE ENTIRE WEEKS. Oh boy did Alcina get worried when she couldn't find him.

Thank you for the ask! I hope you enjoy!

[lilsocksiswriting]

Stuck in A Cabin in a Snowstorm, What Did You Think Was Going To Happen?

Fandom: Haikyuu

Paring: Bokuto X Fem!reader

Summary: You accuse Bokuto of hiding heating packs in his  sweats while stuck in a cabin during snowstorm.

Warnings: NSFW, no beta, minors DNI

Tags: College AU,  Hand job, Fingering, pussy eating, Light overstimulation, 

Word Count:  3283

I promise this whole blog won't be just Bokuto. I just really like that himbo

This was ridiculous, but you keep telling yourself that things could be worse. You could be stuck out in the snowstorm instead of inside in front of a cozy fire. But who leaves their cabin unlocked? What cabin didn’t have electricity in this day and age? And more importantly, why do you have to be stranded in a cabin with him.

You set it in front of the fireplace and it's decent fire. Whoever owned the cabin had a large stockpile of wood kept nice and dry under a thick tarp outside. Between the fire and Bokuto setting behind you not one part of your body was cold, yet you couldn’t settle down. Mainly in part that you hated that Bokuto was right about sharing body heat.

“They said that rescue would be here first thing in the morning right?”, you ask Bokuto for the third time. The cabin wasn’t quite out in the middle of nowhere so you two had cell service, but your phone had died and Bukoto’s was at 10% now which meant he had to conserve that battery power until rescue got here. 

You feel his chest expand then deflate as he lets out a sigh, “Yes Y/N they’ll be here bright and early. Just not soon enough.”

“Rude," you pout, " I'm great company."

“No, rude is asking me the same question five times now.

“Excuse me," you try setting up a little straighter, "it's only been three.”

“Three too many.”, the athlete scoffs.

“You’re insufferable,” you shift around more adding, “and uncomfy.”

You hear him swallow thickly then say in a strained voice like you were testing his patience, “You know I really wish you wouldn't do that.”

You don’t stop shifting as you complain, “Well I really wish I wasn’t stuck in this cabin setting on an itchy bearskin rug with you.”

You suddenly freeze when you feel something poking your lower back. No way. No fucking way. You scamper away from Bokuto and turn your body to face him. Sure enough between his open Legs was a bulge in the crotch of his gray sweats he wore under his snowsuit.

“Bullshit.”, is your response to the sight. 

Meeting his gaze Bukoto’s glaring at you, but that wasn’t new and neither is his annoyed  tone, “What did you just say?”

You try to act like you aren’t phased by the deep tone, “I-there’s no way you're that big. What are you hiding in there?” your eyes narrow, ”Heating packs?”

“What?" he's confused for a split second, "No! I told you to stop squirming!”

“I didn’t do that,”  you deny what you had done and repeat, “And there’s no way in hell you're that big.”

“Well I am.”, he tells you in a matter-of-fact voice.

“No, you’re not. Were you trying to impress that girl in our gen Ed English class? The one that’s always making eyes at you?”

“No- wait she likes me?”

You roll your eyes, “Yes, but not the point. What do you have in your pants Bokuto.”

“My Dick.”

“Bull. Shit.”

“I’m not lying!”, he groans though his head back and gives you a nice view of the way his Adam's apple bobs for a moment.

You cross your arms setting up a little straighter, voice becoming more serious, "Then show me.”

There was a long pause. It takes a moment for what you were demanding him to do to register in Bokuto’s head, “I’m not showing my dick Y/N.”

“Because it's fake. I mean look at it,” you point an accusing finger at the bulge, “How are you still hard.”

Bokuto suddenly becomes bashful looking off to the side. The dim light from the fire is all the lighting you need to see the red inching up his neck, “Seeing you angry it's... kinda hot ok.”

“That,” you scoff, “ is a blatant lie.” Though a small part of wishes that it wasn’t, “Just admit that you're lying about having a big dick. It makes you look worse when you’re still trying to lie about it”

“Fuck! Fine,” Bokuto Throws up his hands then slams back down on the rug with a dull thud and pushes himself off the ground, “You wanna see it so bad.”, he says in a voice that’s low, threatening, and hot.

Time seemed to slow down as he steps towards your spot on the rug.  Bokuto pulls down the waistband of his sweats and his erection springs out right in your face. The mushroom tip already flushed and red and drooling a slimy bead of clear pre-cum. A thick vein runs along the underside of a thicker shaft, all of which sat above a heavy set of balls. And yes, the carpet did match the drapes like the girls in your gen ed English class wondered a little too loudly.

You sit there staring at the monster of a cock Bokuto really does have with your mouth hanging open. Bokuto has half a mind to shove it down your throat if you're just going to sit like that. It's like you were waiting for him too.

Your jaw snaps shut, mouth pressing in a thin line. You didn't want it to be true.  It would just further make Bokuto out to be as perfect as everyone thought he was.

"A Prosthetic," you come to a possible conclusion, "You're wearing a fake one."

You clip your glare up just in time to see the man fisting his salt and pepper hair then running his hands down his face, "Are you fucking serious Y/N? My dick's right in your face and You think it's fake?”

"Yea. I do."

"Why?

You shrug, not wanting to admit the childish reason why "I just do."

"Ok,” Bokuto breaths coming to his own conclusion, "then touch it."

In your shock you choke out, "Wh-what.

Your expression puts a smirk on his face. He puts his hands and his hips and bounces on the heels of his socked feet making his heavy cock bounce as well.

"Go on,” he challenges, “If you're so sure that my dick’s fake then see for yourself."

Your eyes flick from Bokuto's smug look to his weeping cock.

"Well?", he prompts impatiently.

You not being able to say no to a challenge, especially ones from the likes of the star athlete, reach your hand up. You swallow thickly when your hand wraps around the thick base which it can barely do. The erection was warm, weighty and firm in your hand. You can feel it pulse under your palm. All things pointing to the penis in your hand being very real. When you give it a sharp tug everything stays intact. You begin to stroke his shaft slowly, trying to find any indication of it being fake.

Bokuto trembles under your touch letting out a shaky breath. Under it, You hear him say, “Holy Fuck Y/N.”

Looking back up Bokuto is looking down at you as you jerk him off in shallow strokes. His eyes are dark and clouded, his lips are parted slightly, and his breath comes out in shakey huffs. A quiet moan slips past your lips as Bokuto needly bucks his hips into your fist. Even though Bokuto is standing over you, you feel like you have all the power over him, and you love it.

But Bokuto doesn't. Don't get him wrong, he could just cum from feeling and seeing your hand wrapped around his dick. It was that devilish smirk that spreads across your face as you jerk him off faster knowing he has no power over your hand that makes him feel weak.

 He tries to play it cool, "S-So, real enough for you?"

"Not quite. I need to finish my inspection before I decide that.", you say slyly and it fills Bokuto with both dread and arousal. Just what were you planning on doing to him?

“Then by all means inspect away.” 

The more that you stroke his cock the more Bokuto was coming to undone. By now you had already come to terms with Bokuto's penis being real. But admitting that was the last thing on your mind. You sit on your knees a little straighter, open your mouth, and look up at Bokuto not waiting for his permission.

"Fuck Y/N if you do that. If you put in my month -I’m going to cum.", Bokuto frantically informs you, his voice cracking and desperate to feel your hot mouth.

 You keep looking up at the athlete's face as you lay the head flat on your tongue close to your lips around it. You want to take more, see if you could make it past your gag reflex, but Bokuto wasn't kidding. His hands clench at his hoodie as his jaw goes slack and his mouth hangs open letting out one lang shaky moan.  His cum fills your mouth quickly and seeps down you though causing you to swallow or gag.

As he's calming down from his short high Bokuto smirks. Now it was your turn to be bashful and look away as you wipe your mouth with the back of your hand.

"Real enough for you?”

"I don't know. Tastes a little too sweet."

"Because I eat a lot of fruit."

"Excuses, excuses.", you retort.

Bokuto rolls his eyes. He's not done arguing with you. He'll never get tired of getting riled up, but right now he wants other things from you, “Yea yea, now lay down.”

“Oh are you going to make sure my pussy is real now?”, you tease but you’re already laying down on your elbows and spreading your legs so Bokuto can make himself comfortable between them.

Bokuto laughs resting his head against your clothes thigh looking up at you with darken eyes, ”Oh I'm very sure that it’s real and I'm very sure I can ruin it.”

“Ha,”  you put on a confident front but your eyes are  already clouding over with lust, ”I’d like to see you try.”

“Oh you will”,  Bokuto says, not about to let you have the last word.

Bokuto gets to stripping you of everything below your waist. Once he has your bar and the lips of your pussy spread out with his thumbs his mouth latches onto the sensitive pearl between them in a messy kiss. The sudden sucking and feeling of his tongue flat against your clit causes you to take a sharp inhale of breath and kick out a leg. Bokuto makes a ‘hmp’ sound and throws the leg over his shoulder.

 He pushes a finger into your slick heat then soon after another. It only takes the two to stretch you, but he doesn’t stop until he has four fingers  fucking your sloppy cunt.  All that time practicing those razor-sharp cross shots made his fingers calloused. They drag along your wall and press against a particle's soft bundle of nerves in ways that have you seeing stars. 

But just as your walls start to flutter around them Bokuto pulls his fingers and mouth away before you cum. You don’t even care about the pitiful wine that comes out of you because of how unfair Bokuto was being. He can hover over you and smirk like he won something all he wants. It wasn't fair that you got him to cum and he wasn't going to do the same for you.

“Aww, what’s wrong Y/N”, he pants, and it doesn't take a genius to know that he's stroking himself.

“Ass,“ you exhale, ”Do you leave all the women you sleep with this  unsatisfied?”

“Never, I’d just rather make you cum on my dick.”

On instinct you want to retort with a small dick joke, but you can’t when you have already been proven wrong on that. And being honest with yourself didn't sound half bad. His fingers were thick and rough in all the right ways and his tongue was so warm and wet, but his dick was a whole different story. Bokuto looks like he could rearrange your guts and why the hell not? You were on the pill anyway.

“You know how to use that thing?”

He gives you a blank look, ”I've had this thing for 22 years.”

 “So has a lot of other mediocre dudes.”

“You really like to get under my skin, don’t you Y/N.”,  he growls, his blank look turning into a dangerous smirk

 You smirk right back reaching your arms up and looping them around Bokuto’s neck. You do the same with your legs around his waist, locking your ankles together, ‘And I can do it all night, but I want you to put your money where your mouth is and show me rather or not you know how to use that monster cock of yours.”

“Oh so you're admitting it’s real now?”, He says lining up his penis with your soaking hole.

The comeback you have dies in your throat and you left your mouth gaping as he pushes in. Shit, shit, shit he was so fucking big. You can feel every inch being pushed inside you, stretching you in ways his fingers could never.

Bokuto stiffed his jaw forcing himself to go slow. Too fast and he would hurt, but too slow and he can enjoy how your face contorts between pleasure and pain. He lets a shaky huff of air when he finally bottoms out in you fitting nicely against your cervix. You both stare at each other panting, pupils blown.  Bokuto thinks you look so beautiful like this;  breathless, skin flushed pink, and eyes full of want for only him. It's a look he could get used to.

“Why the hell are you panting?” You ask slightly annoyed, “You aren’t the one being split in half here.”

“Y/N, it is taking everything I have not to move for you. I don’t wanna hurt you.”

You take that as both an insult and Bokuto just wanting to make sure you feel nothing but Pleasure. "Well, I’m not some fragile little thing. So move.”

Bokuto pulls back his hips until only an inch of his cock is left inside you, "You’re going to regret bossing me around like that.”  then slams into you.

It was like you here being stretched all over again. But as Bokuto continues to hump into you the burning pain soon fades. Bokuto's thick cock keeps filling you up over and over with each thrust. His dick dragging along that bundle of nerves from before and kissing your cervix makes wither in delight. Seeing you come undone so quickly further fuels his ego.

"You know for someone who acts like they hate me you sure do seem to love my fat cock."

All you can form are moans as Bokuto continues to fuck you at a growing pace. You are faintly aware of the grunts he makes from above and the wet slaps that echo through the tint cabin. But for the most part, all you can think about is the way he fucking your soaking pussy is bring you closer and closer to a huge orgasm you're not sure your body can handle.

“M’gonna- fuuuuuck Bo-,” your walls suddenly clench around him and refused to let go,” Cummin~  of god! ahhhh~” 

Bokuto follows you soon after you. His thrusts became more erratic as he fucks you through your orgasm and reaches his own. In one more powerful thrust Bokuto moans your name against your skin coating your convulsing walls with his cum.

"So was that real enough for you?", Bokuto can't help but ask as he and you catch your breath.

All it takes is a little push from Bokuto to fall over and let you roll on top of him. Before Bokuto's duck can go soft you start to softly rock your hips. Bokuto gasps and throws his head back. His big hands grip your waist but do nothing stop you. You wait until the athlete looks back up at you to strip off the rest of your clothes. His face was downright adorable. You've barely even done anything and you can already see he was getting overstimulated. His mouth was open, panting like a dog, jaw trembling, and eyes blurring.

"Aww what's wrong Bo?" you mock him as he did with you earlier. You quickly rid yourself of your sweatshirt and reach around unclasp your bra, "Is the star ace already out of stamina? Can he not handle a real pussy?"

"I'm still sensitive-" he's cut off by his own winey moan as you start to bounce on his hardening cock, "oh, fuck, fuck, Y/N  you look so fucking good on top of me."

"Yea?"  you smile as Bokuto continues to stare at your tits as they bounce along with you.

"You can look and touch you, oaf," You chuckle, taking Bokuto's hands off your hips and placing them on your breasts.

You let out a low moan when he gives them an experimental squeeze. Your hands slip back down and under Bokuto's hoodie where they come to rest against his chest. Bokuto doesn't even seem to register you putting your weight on him so that you can ride him faster. He can definitely feel the change in tempo.

You really start to feel the burn in your thighs but you refuse to give up riding Bokuto as hard as you can. He looks like he was about to cum and so were you. 

"So much," he moans,"you going milk me dry."

"That is the pint," you pant, " But  I can't sto-"

"No! please. I'm so close to cumming again and you feel so good bouncing on my cock. Shit, and your tits feel so good too.”

You dig your nails into Bokuto’s chest. He bucks his hips into which seem to be all that was needed to send you into your third orgasm. Feeling his seed releasing inside your messy heat has you creaming on his cock. Your third orgasm racks through your body. You fall forward and bury your face in the soft fabric of Bokuto’s hoodie inhaling his scent as your body continues to tremble. 

You stay like that for a bit, at least until the world stops feeling so light and Bokuto’s seed has begun to leak from your plugged cunt. He's flipping you two around and smiling down at you and you're confused fucked out face.

“What? You thought the starting ace would be tired after a few rounds? I can go all night Baby.”

You  smile back meeting his challenge, ”Bet you can?”

rounds of sex later you and Bokuto bask in the warm glow of the fire. Both of you are too tired to care if recuse finds you like this naked with Bokuto's dried cum between your thighs.

Bokuto's rubbing  a hand up and down your spine when he asks you, "So why do you hate me?"

your eyes were closed listing the heat beat but you were still awake enough to hear him and felt that since he spent so much time ruining all other men for you he deserved to know, "You're a great person, but you just kinda seem entitled. Like you assume everyone will like you. You don't earn it."

"That's all? You don't like me because I haven’t earned it from you?"

you nod.

"Oh! Then that's an easy fix. I just have to earn your friendship, then your love."

"One step at a time."

"And step one is asking you to go out for coffee when we make it back.”, you can hear the beaming smile in his voice.

And you can disagree with the offer,” Coffee doesn't sound bad.

[snowe-zolynn-rogers]

Pairings: None

Word Count: 1,937 Words

Summary: Katsuki, stop being a stubborn kid.

Warnings: Child Abuse Mention, Eating Disorder Mention, Food Mention, Forced Eating Disorder Mention, let me know if I should tag anything else.

Usernames: Existence Is A Prison Aizawa: feral cat dad, Aoyama: gay salt, Hagakure: ranch flavored jello, Tokoyami: foil-mecha, Shinsou: farmer toshi, Kuroiro: life is a nightmare, Shiozaki: saviour, Tsunotori: schrodinger better run, Honenuki: pure, Monoma: nat20, Yamada: President Megaphone, Bakugou: deku-deck-you

Notes: I’ve changed Shinsou’s birthday to April 20th because I can.

Aizawa, We Agreed No More Cats: Chapter 6

5:28 AM

Existence Is A Prison

feral cat dad: I swear to god, if you say you're going out for a run, Katsuki.

deku deck-you: ...

deku deck-you: I'm totally not going out for a run.

feral cat dad: Kid, you don't need permission or even to tell us. You're allowed around school grounds, to leave, to the school, ya know. As long as you have your pass for the door, you're good, nothing's stopping you.

deku deck-you: I don't need to tell you where I am?

feral cat dad: No, what you do is your own business. Me and UA are just here to house and teach you. Your actions are your own, you don't have to tell us them.

deku deck-you: Oh.

feral cat dad: It's okay if you want to, but you never have to feel obligated to tell me or anyone else, either.

deku deck-you: It's just my mom made me tell her what I was doing every time I left the house.

feral cat dad: Well, I mean, I obviously know what you're doing every morning at 5:30. So, even if I'm worried, I know what you were doing. I'm also not your mom, I don't want to know where you are every second because you're a kid being a kid, you deserve some privacy. God knows you need privacy after not seeming to have it for fifteen years.

deku deck-you: Thank you, Mr. Aizawa.

feral cat dad: You can call me Dad if you want.

deku deck-you: Dad.

farmer toshi: Child-hoarding Dad.

feral cat dad: You're not wrong.

5:33 AM

Existence Is A Prison

farmer toshi: @deku deck-you, I'm coming, Kats. Wait up.

deku deck-you: Come on then, hurry up.

deku deck-you: You get those wires off today, right?

farmer toshi: Yup. Recovery Girl's fixing me today.

1:16 PM

Existence Is A Prison

farmer toshi: It's official. I can menace once again.

feral cat dad: If you're terrorizing villagers, please don't bring them back armed with pitchforks, I don't like fire.

5:25 AM

Existence Is A Prison

farmer toshi: Kats, where are you, I don't see you.

farmer toshi: @deku deck-you Did you get up early or something?

farmer toshi: Hey, @foil-mecha, Tokoyami, you're in room 9. Have you heard anything in his room?

foil-mecha: His phone pinged when you @ed him. And I swear I heard him moving around a bit earlier.

farmer toshi: Do you think he's okay? Maybe he's sleeping again?

foil-mecha: No, usually he's up for the day once he's up.

feral cat dad: God, did he push himself too much to recover quickly?

President Megaphone: I'm in early, I'm coming over and checking on him since you're in not position to help him if he's hurt, Shouta.

feral cat dad: Fine.

6:35 AM

Existence Is A Prison

foil-mecha: Is Katsuki okay?

farmer toshi: He fine, just malnourished. He passed out after he woke up, ended up hitting his head a little on the ground, and getting a minor concussion.

gay salt: How!?

deku deck-you: I thought our parents were the ones that paid for our groceries but my parents have told me they won't do it.

feral cat dad: Don't worry about him and his stubbornness, I'll be bringing him to the store later once he feels better and making him pick up foods.

ranch flavored jello: Katsuki! The card you got! The barcode! You just scan the barcode! UA pays for your food while you're in the dorms!

deku deck-you: I know that now, Toru. I thought our family or parents paid for our food.

4:16 PM

Existence Is A Prison

feral cat dad: Okay, get dressed and get a list if you want, kid. What foods do you like?

deku deck-you: Well, I'm allergic to shellfish.

feral cat dad: You've been eating with us all week and you didn't tell us you were allergic to something?

deku deck-you: I avoided things that had shellfish in them.

feral cat dad: Katsuki.

deku deck-you: You act like my mother didn't practically force me to have allergic reactions when she was tired of me.

feral cat dad: You're right, I do act like that because that's not okay. It's abuse, Katsuki, and I want you to be safe and happy. So please, tell me if you can't or even don't want to eat something.

deku deck-you: Alright.

feral cat dad; Okay, anything else you're allergic to?

deku deck-you: No, just shellfish.

feral cat dad; Anything you particularly like?

deku deck-you: Mackerel with spinach, mushrooms, and chili oil.

feral cat dad: Then we'll grab the stuff for you.

President Megaphone: I'll spoil you, kid, I'm your uncle now.

deku deck-you: If you plan on spoiling me, get me those sausages that look like octopi. I love them but I haven't been allowed to buy them for around five years.

President Megaphone: I swear, Shouta, this nephew will get all the sausages. UA is willing to buy.

feral cat dad: I know, but don't go all 'grab it all' at the store, Hizashi, the kid can grab his own food at his own pace. You can pick him up extra ones whenever. We're letting him pick up his own groceries probably for the first time in his life. Don't overwhelm him.

foil-mecha: Can you pick me up boiled octopus and baby sardines, Mr. Aizawa?

feral cat dad: Sure, I'll grab you a bunch of fish, kid.

foil-mecha: Much appreciated.

deku deck-you: Is there a limit I can use?

feral cat dad: No, there isn't. UA is full of future heroes who will likely need to build muscle to save others, to do that, you need to eat well, Nezu's rule for us dorm kids has always been to make sure we eat, he doesn't care how much it costs as long as you're healthy.

deku deck-you: Wow, that's actually. Just wow.

farmer toshi: Your shitty parents put you on a budget, huh?

deku deck-you: Usually I had to cost less than 1,000¥ per week. It was hard, especially building muscle to be a hero. I ate rice and eggs a lot so I wasn't completely starving but it was always hard living with them.

ranch flavored jello: Aren't your parents like famous or something? Why did they want you to be on a budget?

deku deck-you: They didn't like dealing with me besides to scream at me. I think it was to keep me from leaving them. They'd hand me exactly 1,000¥ every week I had to use my money for food because they wouldn't buy food for me after I turned 5. Then they'd still tell me what I couldn't buy.

foil-mecha: I feel great rage toward your parents and I hope they have a horrible life now without you.

deku deck-you: I do too, don't worry.

4:30 PM

Existence Is A Prison

deku deck-you has started a video call

Hey, Kats, how's your shopping going? -foil-mecha

Are you upside down, Tokoyami? Why are you...? -deku deck-you

I'm on the couch. I refuse to sit correctly. -foil-mecha

Dad and Uncle Zashi are off getting dinner for tonight because Dad's getting a little souped out. So they're picking up some stuff for that and I didn't want to feel alone. -deku deck-you

Hey, little bro. -farmer toshi

I turn 16 tomorrow for your information. Call me 'little bro'. I'm probably the oldest of us kids in the dorms right now. -deku deck-you

I turn 16 tomorrow. -farmer toshi

Oh my god, I practically have twin sons now. -feral cat dad

Deal with it, Dad. -farmer toshi

Looks like I'm going over to the cake section and picking up two cakes. - President Megaphone

Strawberry. -farmer toshi

You don't have to. -deku deck-you

No, I don't have to, but I'm going to. -President Megaphone

Anything. -deku deck-you

You're getting your own cake, Katsuki. I'm not just gonna pick you up anything. What's your favorite cake flavor?  C'mon, little listener.-President Megaphone

I don't know. I've never had cake before. -deku deck-you

So a variety cake. I can work with that. -President Megaphone

Hey, Kats, can you grab those meat buns and red bean buns in the red bag to your right for me? -nat20

Yeah, okay. -deku deck-you

You're amazing. -nat20

What have you picked out so far, Kats? -ranch flavored jello

Uh, mushrooms, spinach, bean sprouts, eggs, mackerel, and Seiko's bun thing. I'm in the meat section so I'll probably pick up two of those...-deku deck-you

Two of what? -saviour

I got em. Those octopus sausages. I found them. I'm getting two of them.  Are you guys sure I'm not spending too much? -deku deck-you

Pick up anything you will either eat or give to someone else who will eat it. -feral cat dad

As long as you're sure. -deku deck-you

What'd you pick up, twinsie? -farmer toshi

Boiled octopus, bacon, ham, chicken, another two sets of the buns. -deku deck-you

Are you picking up things to eat with rice and eggs out of habit, Kats? -foil-mecha

I wanna buy what I know I like first before I buy things I won't eat. I already hate spending money as it is. -deku deck-you

Reasonable. Just make sure you pick up snacks for yourself since training for a Sports Festival takes a lot out of you. -feral cat dad

I am. Ooh, yoghurt. -deku deck-you

I'm right here, Katsuki. -feral cat dad

Hi, Dad. Alright, I'm ending this. Y'all text me if you want something else. -deku deck-you

Bye, twinsie. -farmer toshi

deku deck-you has ended the video call

5:30 PM

Existence Is A Prison

President Megaphone: I'm getting started on dinner. Should be done by 7.

deku deck-you: Can I eat my ice cream?

feral cat dad: You're allowed to eat whatever and whenever.

deku deck-you: I know, I just worry. It'll go away, I hope. I just get worried.

feral cat dad: Getting worried is normal. I was too when I was in your position.

deku deck-you: You were in my position?

feral cat dad: Kind of. Back then, fifteen years ago, there was no teacher or other students in the dorms, just me and Nezu. I was fresh from nine years in a foster home that would spend the money meant to support me on their own son.

feral cat dad: For the first month, I didn't buy myself food. I'd eat breakfast and lunch on school days and skip dinner and meals on weekends because I was scared of spending UA's money.

feral cat dad: After almost a month with no financial transactions on my account and the Sports Festival coming up, Nezu did a surprise inspection and flipped out when there was no food in the kitchen. He forced me to the store and made me buy dinner for us two because he wouldn't allow a student under his roof to not have food for themselves.

feral cat dad: Nezu sat me down and told me the same thing I told you and, after the Sports Festival, I actually bought myself and four friends dinner at a nice restaurant to celebrate me and my friend's winning tie and I paid the bill without even thinking about it.

gay salt: Wait, there was a tie at the sports festival?

feral cat dad: The first year rounds fifteen years ago, the only winning tie because we refused to fight again.

gay salt: I'll have to watch that and see my badass teacher fighting.

feral cat dad: The sports festivals are all free to watch on your televisions in your rooms, no need to pay to watch on YouTube.

Taglist: @everythingisstardust 

[gabriel4sam]

Seventy-two varieties of root vegetable and other tasty things to discover (now that the Sith are dead); a Gen Obi-Wan story!

Written for theObi-Wan Kenobi Gen exchange and beta-ed by the charming @texasdreamer01

Under the cut, the fic! 

It was when he saw Ahsoka eyeing a beetle with keen interest than Obi-Wan decided it was time for an intervention. He had totally failed the culinary education of his own Padawan, he wouldn’t fail it in the same way for his Grandpadawan.

“You didn’t fail my education, Master, seriously-“

“-Shh, Anakin, I’m the one telling the story.”

The war was dying down, for no reasons the Jedi could exactly pinpoint. They were doing exactly the same things they had done for years, but this time the other side was answering their propositions of peace talks and, sector by sectors, the combats were stopping and tentative talks started.

The Senate was busy sending ambassadors left and right, companies were tentatively establishing commercial routes again, employment was going up and even Asajj Ventress was calming down, because after finally killing Dooku the only thing she apparently wanted was to roam the galaxy with a besotted Quinlan Vos trailing behind her like a besotted, if well-armed, puppy.  

How sad it was that a previously undiagnosed heart condition had taken Chancellor Palpatine before his time, before he could see the peace and harmony he had so wished for.

“Padmé will laugh so much when she hears you called her blaster an undiagnosed heart condition.”

“The joint investigation between the Judicial officers and the Jedi was thorough, Anakin. Heart condition.”

So, Anakin liked to eat worms, Ahsoka wasn’t far behind, the clones had only eaten rations for all their lives, and once a strange mushroom in Fives’ case. That had prompted hours of talking to the wall and giggling about stuff his foot was telling him, the right because the left was apparently quite rude. After seeing that, and also the way Fives had been ill after, none of the vode had wanted to test anything that wasn’t a ration sealed in vacuum and with the same taste every time, no matter what was written on the package.

Time for an intervention.

Obi-Wan had called his old friend Dex and asked for the permission to borrow his diner during the closing day.

Anakin had whined that it was a little hypocritical of Obi-Wan, who survived on tea, sass and more tea, with sometimes some algae biscuits thrown in it when Bant could corner him long enough, to comment on anyone’s eating habits.

“I didn’t whine!”

“You really did, my dear. And you do on a regular basis.”

Dex had said yes and even offered his diner, and more importantly his kitchen, every closing day when Obi-Wan was on Coruscant.

So, Obi-Wan had chosen his first tasters.

Ahsoka, of course, for who he had started all of that. Worms and beetles and other crawling things were fine in a pitch, he had himself sometimes indulged when Qui-Gon Jinn’s latest nonsense had thrown his Padawan self in the middle of a jungle with no rations. He could also admit that with the stress of the war, he had let his responsibilities erase his body’s normal hunger, but it was no more a time of war. Time to eat like a civilized sentient.

Anakin himself. Young Knight Obi-Wan, struggling with grief and -he could see it now- depression, had let this feral child keep his slave days habits in term of food: Anakin ate everything that couldn’t move away quick enough, in a latent fear there wouldn’t be something to fill his belly later. It was honestly heart-breaking.

It could also be heart-healing: the way the younger Jedi always insisted for Ahsoka to eat first… Obi-Wan will fight for every child in the galaxy to have enough, not like Anakin couldn’t when he was younger and now that the war is finishing, he hoped they could make a difference here.

Padme, because now that the so-called secret marriage was out in the open, he hoped he could spend more time with the young woman and deepen their nascent beginning friendship. The galaxy really could do with more friendship.

And Rex and Cody, the two vode they were closest to. Once those two had come back to the barracks in better shape than Fives after his mushrooms experience, the other vode could probably be convinced to try something else than rations.

Aaylala, who had just taken her first Padawan and would spend a year of Coruscant to better learn each other, had already put herself, the Padawan and Commander Bly on what she called jokingly “Master Kenobi’s dinner waiting list”. She wanted to explore with them the food of her home planet and reconnect with her culture.  Boil and Waxer could probably be convinced, too.

It meant the first experience had to be a success.

After his morning session with the Council, Obi-Wan had taken his afternoon off, that too being a new event in the Jedi Order. Most of the time, Bant or Anakin had too threaten to sit on him just for him going to bed. Everybody had sworn to never talk again about that time it had been so bad Master Windu himself really did have to sit on him for Obi-Wan just to take a nap.

“Speaking for yourself, Master, me, I’m never ever going to let you forget that one.”

He had slowly explored the closest market, feeling slightly nostalgic. Qui-Gon always had insisted food should be a fuel, not a passion. He had also said that taking pleasure in the taste, the smell, the hundreds of wonderful vegetables, fruits, meats, grains, offered by nature, that it was celebrating the joy of life, of the Force...

Obi-Wan realized he had forgotten that, in the despair of the war. Now, he took pleasure in choosing fresh produce for the people he loved. Around him, the market was bustling with life. People laughing, speaking, tasting, vendors celebrating their products… It was the season for one of the biggest food import of Coruscant. It was some citrus fruit which had the very rare peculiarity, a very rare one, to be edible for all known sentients. The smell was everywhere in the market, fresh and cleansing and Obi-Wan had taken a bite of one with a groan of pleasure the moment he had purchased them, the juice sweet and slightly acidic at the same time.

When he got to the dinner, he cooked with the same deep happiness of preparing something easy, nutritious and tasty for his family. He had decided to make it simple for the first time, not wanting to push the boundaries of Cody and Rex. Going from rations to a nine-course meal would probably be overkill.

Obi-Wan himself tended to a vegetarian diet, like Qui-Gon had, but he hadn’t always had a choice, and Ahsoka’s body needed an animal based died in a way human didn’t, so he had dismissed his all-time favourite recipe, a creamy vegetable pie a young Padawan Obi-Wan Kenobi had learned from a young senatorial aid Bail Organa.

He prepared a stew which he had learned from Kit Fisto, with a lot of root vegetables and some river fish, aromatic bark from the Gold system and just a little touch of black salt. Soon, the entire diner smelled of Obi-Wan’s teenage years, when he and Bant did their homework and Kit Fisto prepared dinner.

Obi-Wan had a smile on his face, a nostalgic glint in his eyes. He should call Bant, soon. Perhaps she and some of their other childhood friends could come the next time….For dessert, he cleaned yellow, purple and red berries from Naboo, to honour Padmé, to be eaten with fresh cheese.

Nothing very complicated. Just simple food, to share and to rejoice in the new chance of the galaxy.

“To the peace?” Padmé proposed for toast at the beginning of the meal and all, they raised their glasses.

“To the peace,” they repeated in answer.

Seated between Cody and Rex, Obi-Wan explained sotto voce what exactly they were eating. He explained the planet of origin of every vegetable –

“Because everything has to be an occasion for a lecture.”

“Anakin, if you don’t stop, you will be in charge of the washing-up. And I used a lot of saucepans.”

Rex was very, very cautious with his first taste. He had been there when Fives had vomited everything he had ever eaten, and had been slightly alarmed once Obi-Wan had explained what a root vegetable was.

“Doesn’t seem very hygienic.” Was his opinion.

It changed after first taste and his plate was quickly cleaner than a ship before the admiral’s inspection.

Cody was more curious about why different sorts of vegetables had been designed.

“Waste of resources,” he decided, “one per species of sentient who wanted to eat them would have been sufficient.”

Obi-Wan hadn’t laughed. How could Cody, raised in the sterile environment of Kamino, know better about the extraordinary abundance of nature? In his own plate, he had picked a small section of one of the root vegetables he had chosen.

“This is a red stachys”, he explained, “the species comes from a planet all the way in the Outer Rim. It was only present on one of their landmasses, but as it isn’t attacked by fungus or insect pests, it’s now cultivated on all the planets and a lot of other agricultural worlds.”

Anakin made a face. He hated agricultural worlds, mostly for the smell. The desert boy loved his cities.

Obi-Wan smiled at his former Padawan’s face but continued:”Today, you can easily find seven, sometimes ten subspecies in Coruscant markets, but on the original world, where the people had centuries to select cultivars, you can find seventy-two cultivars. And it is only one of the vegetables you can find there.”

“Seventy-two!!”

Cody looked a little more at Obi-Wan’s spoon and the innocent little selection of vegetables swimming in the rich-tasting sauce.

“And every world…”

“Every world has its own food. Every ancient country, you could say. Every area. Sometimes every town has its own speciality.”

It was Cody’s turn to make a face. Not surprising: after years of ration, the abundance of possibilities seemed strange to his mind.

“It tends to be a little standardized today,” Obi-Wan admitted, “but a lot of people are working hard on preserving heirloom varieties and culinary traditions…”

Cody stabbed a bit of fish with his own cutlery and tasted it, chewing cautiously.

On the other side of the table, Padmé and Anakin were flirting. Anakin’s lines were terrible but Padmé’s own use of Naboo flowery poetry wasn’t exactly better.

Next to Cody, Rex and Ahsoka were whispering something about putting joy back in the Senate and something very suspicious about dye that Obi-Wan and Cody definitely weren’t hearing, because that one would be Commander Fox’s problem.

Cody tasted a yellow stachys, stolen directly from Obi-Wan’s plate because there were only red in his own plate. Then he tried again a red, pairing it with a green kidney-shaped pod.

“And that?” He asked, poking another pod.

“Magnolens. Seldom grown today, originated from the world of Glee Anselm.”

Cody seemed lost in thought, so Obi-Wan let him chew in peace, instead discussing literature with Padmé. They had all sworn they wouldn’t speak of work tonight, so every time they drifted to politics, Anakin interrupted them by stealing a kiss from Padmé.

It was a rousing and pleasant success.

“Master?” Ahsoka asked later, when she was helping with cleaning Dex’s kitchen. It would probably be neater than before their arrival.

“Yes, my dear?”

“Can I come to the market with you next time? And I think Rex would like it too.”

“Of course you can.” She gave him a sudden hug, surprising him.

From the kitchen, Obi-Wan could see the rest of them, Padmé and Cody lost in debate, Anakin just finishing his third helping of dessert.  Rex had taken apart his own dessert, testing the berries one by one.

His former Padwan sensed their gazes and turned to them, a smile on his face. His eyes were clearer than they had been in years, and Obi-Wan felt pride and happiness swell in him.

“You would be very welcome, my dear,” He answered his Grandpadawan.

[sharkbarkinnit]

𝕿𝖊𝖈𝖍𝖓𝖔 𝖝 𝕽𝖊𝖆𝖉𝖊𝖗

𝓡𝓮𝓪𝓭𝓮𝓻'𝓼 𝓟𝓞𝓥

It was a very chilly day today so I sat curled up in a fluffy blanket on the sofa. The fire crackled as I turned the page of my book ever so gently as to not ruin the page. It's been about an hour since Techno had left to go the market in the village near by. We needed some new cups since the last ones broke from the cold. I decided to end the chapter and get ready for the day. Techno didn't know but I was going to make dinner tonight and needed to get some things in order to prepare for tonight's feast. I set the book down gently on the side table and head upstairs to change.

I put on a sleek black button up and some thick black pants. I tend to wear thicker clothing considering that it's the temperatures are very low out here and it helps protect against any unwanted brawls with mobs. I grab my lighter armor pieces and tie them on into place. As I'm fumbling with the strap I hear the bedroom door open. I turned to see the tall pink haired man staring at me. I flash him a smile and continue to adjust the leather straps.

"Where you going? If you needed something why didn't you ask?"

"It's a surprise."

"A surprise?"

"Yes."

I felt his strong arms wrap around me from behind. "You never have surprises?" the tall man says sounding almost as a question. I giggle and look up so I could see him. I pat the side of his face and break loose from his grip. I slip on my boots and tighten the straps. Techno drapes my grey cloak around my shoulders and hooks the chain on the other side. We both walk out of the room and towards the front door. I grab my sword and some potions just in case and begin to walk to the door. I felt Techno grab my hand and turn me around. He places a soft kiss on my head and smiles. "Be careful. If anything happens come straight back. You get spotted you lead 'em to me ok?" He says worriedly. I nod and smile, "I know Techno, I'll be careful I can handle myself."

I walk out the door and begin the journey to the village. It's a cold day but still beautiful. As I walk through the snowy biome I notice it becoming dark and quicken my pace as to make it there before the shops close.

Finally after what seemed like forever I make it to the village and into one of the shops. I look around and pick out things I would need for the dinner. I decided I'd make chicken marsala tonight. Not many know this recipe since it's a fancy dish and only royal families eat it but I was taught by my father who was once a royal chef. (A/N I know chicken marsala isn't in minecraft but yk I'm putting it in it's my favorite food and that's why not many people know the recipe.)

After paying I start heading back hand on my sword since it was almost completely dark. I quicken my pace seeing the house come into view. I was nearly to the door and took out some extra meat I had bought and threw it to Ed, Baba, and Steve. Techno loves those bears and I can see why they're very sweet and protective. I walk up to the door and was immediately greeted by the pink haired man. I watched as he checked to see if I was ok and giggled as he sighed with relief to see that I'm perfectly fine.

"What's in the bag?" He says reaching for the brown paper bag. I swat his hand away gently and frown.

"It's a surprise remember," I say and slightly hug the bag to my chest and walk towards the kitchen.

"Right right, surprise!" He chuckles follows me to the kitchen.

I set the bag down and pull out the food. I quickly notice he's watching over my shoulder and turn around. "Out! Out out out! Out of my kitchen!" I shout playfully.

"Your kitchen? Since when did this become your kitchen?" Techno questioned laughing.

"Since you let me move in." I answer plainly. "Now out!" I giggle and lightly shove him out of the kitchen. I turn back to the food and start to prepare the dish for the oven. Once finished with that I make the wine sauce and mushrooms. As soon as the sauce is finished I coat the chicken and pour the rest into the dish and place it in the preheated oven. I pull out some of our fresh potatoes and start to wash them and cut them up. I place the diced potatoes in a pot and boil them. Once they were finished I drain them and season them placing them on a plate and just in time my timer goes of for the chicken and I take the chicken out putting the two chicken breasts on a the plates and pouring some sauce on top.

"Techno go into the dinning room for your surprise!" I shout to him. I hear him get up a move to the dinning room and take it as my que to take the drinks in. I grab two wine glasses and some fine wine I had bought while at the shops. We don't drink often but when we do it's usually just a glass of wine. I walked into the dinning room with the drinks and sat on down in front of him and one down in front of my spot across from him.

"Wine? We don't usually have wine with our dinner." Techno questions.

"Just wait!" I smile and say proudly.

I walked back into the kitchen grabbing the plates and taking them back into the dinning room.

"Close your eyes" I said behind him. He nods letting me know they're closed and I set the plate in front of him and move over to my spot and sit down with my plate.

"Okay now open them!" I said smiling. He opens his eyes and gasps.

"You made this?!" He says shocked.

"Yep! My father taught me when I was younger! It's one of my favorite dishes and thought you would like it!" I smiled and looked up at him. His eyes fixated on the chicken in front of him, mouth watering. I giggled and began to eat. After a few bites I noticed he hadn't touched the food.

"Are you ok? You haven't touched your food." I said worriedly.

"It's to beautiful to eat." He said solemnly.

I let out a little giggle and nudge his leg a little with my foot telling him to eat it. He lets out a sad sigh and began to take a bite. He groans in satisfaction and relaxes in the back of his chair. I laugh.

"It's that good huh?" I asked jokingly.

"Good?! It's heavenly!" He announces loudly.

"Good! I knew you'd love it!" I smile

We both continue eating and making small talk occasionally he'd make a comment about how much he loved the food. After eating we continued to sit at the table sipping our wine and joking about random things. It was getting late. I got up and yawned stretching my arms and grabbing our dishes. I quickly wash the dishes putting them away and walk into the room upstairs. Techno already ready for bed and waiting. I chuckle lightly quickly change into my pajamas and crawl into bed next to Techno. He wraps his arms gently around my waist and gives me a soft kiss. I smiled and looked into his gorgeous red eyes.

"Thank you for dinner. It was amazing." He says softly and smiles. I smile back and snuggle up against the warm man.

"You're welcome my love." I replied softly.

Tonight was a great night and I only hope for more of them.

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Thank you guys for reading! I really enjoyed writing this so I hope you liked reading it just as much! Have an amazing day/night and remember to hydrate!

-Sharkie

(also if some how you also saw this on ao3, wattpad, or quotev don’t worry this is mine! :) )

[randomoranges]

rambly fic thing as always. 

Boxed Up

It’s a quiet dinner, safe for the scrape of forks against the dinner plates. Well – mostly his fork against his dish. Étienne’s been playing with his food more than actually eating at it, digging out the wild mushrooms from the risotto and chewing on them for longer than necessary. He’s been this way for the better part of the week and Edward has no idea what’s been eating at him. He’s asked, on more than one occasion, but Étienne’s been cagey. Edward’s giving him until the weekend before sitting him down proper and confronting him about whatever’s been bothering him. It’s been a hell of a week and a crazy month at that too, so it could be a myriad of different things, for all he knows.

 He’d ask now, over dinner, but they’re both tired and he’s not sure he has enough energy for pushing the issue until it’s solved. He feels as though he’ll just end up hurting his partner by saying the wrong thing, despite the best of his intentions. Therefore, he gives Étienne space and just hopes that he’ll come around in his own time. He can tell that Étienne wants to breech whatever has been bothering him, but he too is looking for the right time. Edward worries. Always. It’s part of his nature. He knows how Étienne can get and doesn’t want that for him.

 Edward’s about to clear the dishes, seeing as Étienne’s made little to no progress on his meal, when, as if reading his mind, his boyfriend speaks out, quiet and fragile, over his mound of simmered rice and mushrooms.

 “Are you happy?” He asks and Edward blinks, wondering if he’s even heard right.

 “What?” He asks intelligibly, the question having taken him by surprise.

 “Are you bored?” Étienne asks instead.

 “What?” He repeats, a broken machine that has failed to comprehend the simply task that’s been asked of it.

 “Of us. Are you bored of us – our relationship – our lives? Are you happy being here – with me and our life?”

 He blinks again. He has no idea where this is coming from. He would have never guessed that this has been the issue plaguing his boyfriend’s mind. He wonders what this means. Where Étienne wants to go with this and if it isn’t some cataclysm to something bigger and mightier.

 Instead, he takes a sip of water to buy him some time to ponder the best way to answer these questions other than stating the obvious. At least – the obvious to him.

 “I’m not bored,” He says, finally, “And I’m quite happy with our life together.”

 He thinks maybe that will be that and Étienne will be content with the answer, but he’s known the other for too long and so he’s able to tell that there’s still more gnawing at his mind.

 “Are you – unhappy? Bored? Is this what this is about?” He asks, fear taking hold of his own mind. Is Étienne about to tell him that he wants a break? Wants to end this? Edward would be devastated. Blindsided as well.

 “What – no! I like our life!” He says quickly, almost insulted Edward would suggest otherwise. “I’m just – it’s just – don’t you find we spend too much time together?”

 Sometimes, he wishes Étienne could be clear when he talks about things that are bothering him. The roadmap to the real issue is always a complicated mess with sharp turns and pedantic questions that lead from one existential dilemma to another, until finally, with careful word choice, Edward is able to get to the real root of the problem. He momentarily wishes Étienne would have waited until the weekend to expose his issues – when they’d both be more rested, but he supposes he’ll take what he can. At least, he thinks, Étienne is talking. In his own complicated way.

 “What do you mean?”

 “We’re literally always together. We work together. You drive me to work. We have lunch together – often. We do things on weekends together – usually. Aren’t you afraid that at some point you’ll get bored? Is this what life is all about? Is this what you really want out of your life? Don’t you wish it was more exciting? Is this what you wanted when you were younger?”

 He’s getting closer to the nucleus, Edward can tell, but there are still some other red flags popping up along the way that Edward wants to address. To make sure Étienne is okay. That there isn’t some other bigger issue hidden in the shadows.

 “I mean – no, I don’t think I saw myself living this exact life when I was a teenager – then again, I didn’t think much beyond what I would be doing next weekend. But, I don’t feel suffocated by the time we spend together. We’re not always together either, even if we do work at the same place. It might be a little unconventional, but we have our own friends we see without the other and activities we do on our own. Like when I go skiing over March break and you go down south with Emma.” He tries and hopes he’s hit a mark. Étienne nods, as if reassured by this and Edward lets out a breath he’s been holding.

 “I can’t speak for the future, but right now, I’m not bored. It might not be the most exciting life, but I like it just fine... I like what we’re building together.” There’s a pause and when Étienne doesn’t say anything, he figures he’ll take a shortcut, “What’s this all really about, Étienne?”

 Étienne sighs deeply and decapitates his mound of risotto with the back of his fork. “I don’t know,” He starts and then jabs the rice, “I mean – I do, but – it’s just – we’ve been together for a while now – years, really and it’s just – I’d hate for you to wake up one morning, turn around and realise that this has been a waste. That you’ve missed out on some big adventure or something.”

 He wants to laugh, but he doesn’t. He’s always considered his life with Étienne to be his big adventure. In all his wildest dreams, he’d never thought he’d get this – stability, a partner he loves and who loves him back – even when he drives him crazy.

 “When did we become boring, old queers, Ed?”

 This time, he does laugh – a soft little chuckle – and he also reaches over for Étienne’s hand to give it a squeeze.

 “I think we’re just getting older. We want different things and are at different points in our lives.”

 “Are we though? I mean – I remember when I was twenty and hitting the clubs. I had some crazy, wild fun nights, at the time. Meeting new people, staying up ‘til all hours. Hooking up. Going to one party after another. God, when’s the last time we even had drag brunch? You used to bring me to those all the time! When’s the last time you even saw your friends from drag?! Now we’re just – two people. Where’s our rebellious spark?!”

 Edward quiets. Étienne has a point. He remembers his own youth, way back when, and the crazy things he’d done. The trips with his friends to other queer cities, the drag shows he’d gotten involved with, volunteering for Pride and such. It feels like a different lifetime ago – something that could have even happened to a different person all together. Had they really done any of those things?

 “When’s the last time we even saw any of our queer friends? It’s like the only circle we’re involved in now is the teacher one. I had to find out through Facebook that Steven and Max broke up. Steve and Max!”

 There we go, Edward thinks, the nucleus.

 “If they can break up then who’s to say it can’t happen to us?”

 The news had come as a blow to both of them, really. Edward had met Steve and Max through Étienne and even then, already, they had been Steve-and-Max. They’d been together for nearly twenty years and were an inspiration, really. Despite being together, they were still active in the community, still went out, and still enjoyed life. Max had even proposed to Steve, a few years ago, and anyone who’d seen the video of the proposal had cried at how utterly sweet and romantic it was.

 “Sweetheart, listen – no one knows for sure what’s going to happen to us in the future. But I promise I’m not bored and I like being with you. If ever anything changes, I would absolutely tell you. The best we can do is to take it a day at a time and check in with each other, if ever we feel like something is off.”

 “I guess,” Étienne mumbles, “But when did it get like this? When did we get washed out?

Sometimes I feel like I’ve been erased. That any personality trait I have or had is gone. All I am is a teacher. Day in and day out. I only ever get to be myself on few occasions. Convenient periods of time pre-established by the school agenda. When did I stop being the person you met when we started dating? When we used to do things that were something else than Being a Teacher?”

 Edward doesn’t say anything. He gets it. So much. It has never fully occurred to him, but Étienne has hit the nail on the head. There have been times, when, upon reflection, he’s felt as though the institution of school has been like a closet and that he’s been forced back in it. Hiding who he is. Not being his true authentic self, but some persona. The teacher persona. Sure, he hasn’t exactly rocked the boat and announced to the school that he’s queer, but he also doesn’t want to. Because it’s his personal life. And because there’s some deep fear anchored deep within him. It might be the twenty-first century, but it’s not a walk in the park either. So he’s kept quiet. Has hidden things about himself, when once, years ago, he had never shied away from being gay.

 Therefore, M Édouard and Edward are two different people. He wonders, briefly, who gets to see the real Edward Murphy and if there’s ever been one, or if, instead, each facet is a part of the real Edward. It’s late and he’s tired. This isn’t the time or day for this type of talk or thought, yet now it nags at him as well, calling for attention.

 “We started dating over summer break – we didn’t have to worry about work and we had all the time in the world. Plus, that was years ago, we’ve also changed – we want new things now.” He tries, repeats, and hopes he sounds as convincing as he’s meant to be – as reassuring.

 “Then why does it feel like settling?”

 Why does it, really?

 “If you could,” He says instead, “What would you do differently?”

 Étienne, this time, is silent as he ruminates. “I don’t know – I mean, I guess the obvious would be to actually talk about my boyfriend when asked. All the teachers with kids keep talking about their goddamned outing apple picking and showing off pictures of their kids with the apples and whatever. Don’t get me wrong, it’s cute but all I ever hear is about the kids, what happened at daycare and weekends up north. I want to talk about my night out at the club, or show pictures of me and my boyfriend on vacation, or whatever other basic human thing I’ve done with my partner without having to fear I’ll get spat at. Or something.  I want to be able to exist. Fully. Not just in parts. I don’t want to be afraid when I show the kids a new artist who happens to be queer. I don’t want to gloss over the facts. I want to wear nail polish to school if I want to. Every inane thing I never questioned before. Most of all, I just want to be.”

 Edward wonders if it would be different if there was actual tangible support they could see. If other teachers spoke about these things – about their queer friends and family – about themselves; if it would feel different and safe. He wonders how many others of their own colleagues are in the same situation and keep to themselves out of fear and he wonders about the other queer teachers who don’t even have a friend or confidant at work. He considers himself lucky, really, that somehow, Étienne managed to find work at his school – that they’ve found each other. Even when they’d only been friends. It had been a blessing to be able to confide in Étienne, then – to have someone who got it.

 “We can always try,” He says after a lapsed moment of silence, “To be more of ourselves – to test the waters, so to say. If someone’s gotta do it, why not us?” He’s not sure how it’ll look, but – they can give it a shot. Take the proverbial baby step. See how it goes.

 “I guess you’re right – just wish it wasn’t always so – exhausting.”

 They leave it at that for now and clear off the table. Once the dishes are done and the leftovers boxed up in the refrigerator, they retire to the living room. Étienne finds solace in Edward’s arms and the two spend a quiet evening replaying the previous conversation in their minds, lost in their own rambling thoughts. There’s a lot to process and they’re both painfully aware that change will take time.

 “What if we tried to actively re-engage with the community – go back to our old hangouts – call up our friends?” Edward suggests, sometime later.

 Étienne ponders this for a moment and then nods, “We might as well try.”

 They may as well. If not them, then who?

 FIN

[thetradeway]

Session 51 Sep 18 2021: “No! Get out of my orifices!”

Right - where were we? Oh yes, we fought some piranha and found some chests and some Duergar statues. We fill Mina in on what she missed; she offers to craft Gideon a new finger.

“No… No, I don’t want your goblin crafts on my body!”

Then there’s some waffle about covid deniers. (Ed believes covid is real; Gideon does not.)

Who wants control of the urine-drenched sorcerer? Sophie, OOC: “You make it sound so appealing.”

She agrees to take Ahleqs, if Matthew will help her out.

Now, when I put a message on the group chat earlier to ask if we were starting at the usual time tonight, our illustrious DM messaged back to say ‘Yep yep yep thumbs up emoji smiley face emoji’ which was far too enthusiastic. We are all now very wary. Ardvack slams a potion before we get started.

Right, where were we going? There is still a strange magical island with a wall around it to explore. There is a boat that leads to it; Gideon advances to Investigate. It looks old but in good shape and water-tight. There are oars. He thinks three will fit in it; he volunteers as do Tarragon and Melaina. Gideon, sternly: “No pilfering, rogue.”

Tarragon rows us across. Do the others want her to go back and pick them up? Apparently not.

Gideon investigates the magical barrier, which is blocking the door, but rolls a nat 1. We make Perception checks - the giant statue of the dwarves god of crafts has an offering bowl at his feet, with something written in Dwarvish. Gideon would read it, but Ed’s buggered off.

“You cannot enter this room.”

Tarragon decides to take this as a challenge. She takes out a gold piece and puts it in the offering bowl; nothing happens so she takes it back out. Gideon covers the ‘not’ part of the carving so it reads 'you can enter this room', but that doesn’t seem to help either.

Tarragon looks at the magical wall. It’s blue, and looks a similar colour to the brazier in the other room. Could we light a torch from the brazier and try waving that at the wall? Maybe. In the meantime Gideon puts some food in the bowl; nothing doing.

Ardvack, shouting across the water: “Have you tried blood?”

Gideon squeezes some blood from his severed finger stump - still nothing. Tarragon rows the boat back to get Kessler, who has hopefully been lighting one of her torches. She has not been able to light her torch from the brazier, however; it won't catch.

Is the bowl loose? Could we pick it up? No, it’s attached to the floor. Could Kessler pick up the brazier? It won’t move either. Time for stupid ideas.

“Hey Carl,” shouts Kessler pointing at the brazier, “put your hand in that.” Carl does not. Kessler gets just such a doggy look from Ardvack; she laughingly tells him she can’t tell because he has no face. Instead he leans down and says snottily, “Carl is precious.” He investigates the brazier. Can he feel warmth coming off it? Nat 20.

There is no heat coming off it. It does create light, but there is no noise. It is not consuming anything physical. He doesn’t think it’s evil or necessarily good; it’s just a spiritual fire. Ahleqs does an Arcana check. It’s some kind of divine magic; he is fairly certain it could be extinguished with a high enough levelled Dispel Magic spell.

Ardvack puts his hand in the brazier; it doesn’t burn him. He puts his whole head in. He’s a bit light-blinded afterward for a minute or so, but is otherwise unharmed.

Tarragon has Dispel Magic, but doesn’t have it prepared. What about Ahleqs? He doesn’t have the spell at all.

Gideon wants to rest his battle-axe on the offering bowl; he does that, but nothing happens. He rescinds the axe. Perhaps crafts, considering the nature of the god? Perhaps something he’s made?

Ahleqs has Ardvack’s leather face mask at the moment; since that was made by Kessler, perhaps we could try that.

Melaina is Investigating the door behind the wall of force. She can see beyond it to a ruined dock. If she puts her hands out to the wall of force, she can feel it though it doesn’t harm her. Would putting the brazier out remove the wall? She rolls a low Insight check and doesn’t know. Gideon rolls a low Religion check as well; he doesn’t know either.

“Alright Goblin, you’re up. Do your thing,” says Gideon. She puts Ardvack's mask in the bowl, but still nothing happens.

DM offers a clue if we roll good on Insight; Ardvack, Melaina and Gideon all do. They think the inscription refers to the desired offering. Gideon wants to put something in the bowl that would not fit in the door.

What about a fish? They breathe air, and so could not pass anywhere above the water. Tarragon steps into the bowl and Wild Shapes into a fish; still nothing happens. She changes back. Is this one of those children’s riddles that we should have definitely got by now? Joe says we will absolutely kick ourselves when we get it.

Ardvack picks a handful of mushrooms - and that bloody well works. You cannot enter this ‘room. Goddammit. Joe removes the wall. If Ardvack had a face, he’d be looking smug.

We go through. Goblin shield goes first. She sees something horrible - it is currently standing motionless. It looks like a huge dwarf in heavy armour, but made of stone, and there is a faint red glow emanating from its chest. There is an open chest next to it full of shiny shinies; Kessler points them out to Melaina, possibly in hopes that she will go first. Melaina, sadly for Kessler, does not fall for this trick.

Ardvack ventures too close and it spots him - initiative time. (Ed has disappeared again. While we wait, we discuss Matthew’s zombie campaign. We will all be level 2 when we return, which gives us an ability called Zombie Grab. Matthew and Sophie order pizza.)

Tarragon Potions and readies a Thorn Whip (which always reminds Sophie of a Walnut Whip. Not the Ann Summers sort of whip, Joe asks? No, but interesting that his mind went there.) Melaina hides and shoots - 24 hits, for 22 damage. Her bow is magical, correct? Yes. Good. Okay. Bits of rock fall off the golem. Hooray!

Does she want to move, say, to run away? (Oh shit.) She moves back so everyone else can get in.

Kessler takes aim with her crossbow. 24 hits for 7 damage, and her weapon is magical as well. She reloads and shoots again for 7 more damage while Matthew and Sophie decide what Ahleqs is going to do.

They decide that he will cast Shatter on the golem. Ba-boom! It has to make a Constitution save - at Disadvantage. “Because you’re made of stone. Like an idiot.” But it gets Advantage on saves versus magic, so that’s just a straight roll. 13. “Ha! You lose!” It takes 19 Thunder damage. Ahleqs cheers, then hides behind Tarragon.

It rushes at us - Tarragon looses her Thorn Whip but misses.

Carl uses his big stick that Tarragon gave him, but misses, almost hitting everyone else around him. He was excited. He doesn’t move, but holds the line.

Gideon is up. “Ed stop eating sausages!”

“… How did you know what I was doing.”

He Acid Splashes it. The Golem fails the save, even with Advantage, and takes 9 Acid Damage.

Like the hero he has proved himself to be, Ardvack does a cautious tactical repositioning to get away from the golem, does Shksdjlsdglsghjkhhbllhh, and then casts Eldritch Blast. It hits, and more stone crumbles off the golem.

Tarragon does Greater Shlgljksdkgjfhl;jjjhh, just to flex on Ardvack, and hits it for 11 Bludgeoning. She bares her teeth at the golem.

Melaina falls back a little, and shoots again. Matthew and Sophie suddenly seem unable to hear the rest of us, so there is a short recess while we sort that out. Their wifi has died. I decide, in my infinite wisdom, to restart my computer; of course, it decides to install something without even asking and so I am still waiting for it long after Matthew and Sophie return. I miss a bunch of stuff; some people do some damage, and the golem does a thing where it forces a Wisdom save - those that fail have their speed halved, and can do an action OR a bonus action on their turn, but not both. Joe makes an attack for me, which hits. Tarragon is pleased. And then I’m back!

The golem is looking ropey. Its light is still glowing, but bits are falling off it. It turns on Carl, even though Kessler has imposed Disadvantage on it if it attacks anyone but her. 14 still hits, as does 29, and he takes THIRTY NINE damage. Carl is now on zero, having had exactly 39 HP previously.

Matthew, sounding worried: “This changes things.”

Carl makes a real death save - and fails. "No! Carl!"

Gideon's turn - and Ed has snuck off again. Or fallen asleep. We skip him for now and move on to Ardvack. “I’ll save you Carl!” Then, to himself as he runs, “Not my precious Carl…” He casts Life Transference. (A lovely, sacred, holy Cleric spell.) He saves Carl, but instantly regrets walking closer to the golem.

Tarragon batters it for 16 damage - the light begins to flicker and sputter in its chest. Does she want to move? “Nope!” She could bonus action dive in the water with the Quippers if she wanted? “… No thank you.”

Melaina does a Scorching Ray - one of the three hits for 7 fire damage total. It’s looking ‘exceedingly ropey’ but is still up.

Kessler gets the how-de-do-dis with her Thunder Gauntlets - she runs up it and yells “Red means stop!” and punches it in the chest. It falls to the ground in a big pile of rubble. We solved Joe’s Golem puzzle!

Matthew, immediately: “Loot its corpse!”

Kessler is holding the gem from its chest; it is no longer glowing. Ardvack sets about the treasure chest. It is open, and there is gold inside. He clicks on the loot chest, and adds 100gp to the 3000cp he finds. (428 cp, and 14gp each.)

Kessler: “Anyone got a Transmute spell?” (That's a lot of coins.)

Ardvack shares out the treasure as equally as possible. Kessler finds herself overburdened. Melaina slyly: “I could carry your treasure for you.”

Kessler: “No thank you.”

Where to next? There was a rope bridge in the room with the brazier that led to an island with a dead giant spider on it; Joe zips us all there for expediency.

Melaina crosses the bridge to approach the ‘very very dead’ spider; it looks like its moving around. Not the legs, but as if there’s something moving under the skin…

A swarm of maggots burst out of the spider, taking her by surprise. They swarm up her legs and over her flesh.

Melaina, equally horrified and furious: “No! Get out of my orifices!”

(This is why Joe was so pleased earlier isn’t it.)

She now has two rot grubs burrowing under her skin. We’ve all heard of these, the subject of adventurer’s tales swapped in taverns. Melaina knows she has to burn them while they’re still just under her skin, or they will burrow to her heart and kill her.

Well shit.

We roll initiative…

Ardvack fails at Eldritch Blast, and the grubs become resistant to that type of damage (Force I think?) for 1d4 rounds. (4. Fuck.)

Ahleqs does a Burning Hands at them. They fail the save and take 6 fire damage. Several screech, and curl up and burn.

Melaina wants to cast Scorching Ray on herself - she can do that. She takes two fire damage, and the grubs die. She can spend the rest of her action to squeeze them back out of the holes they burrowed in through. Delightful.

Tarragon moves to the side and Thunderwaves the swarm - they fail the save and are pushed off the bridge into the water to be eaten by the Quippers. Yay! Everyone wins! We move forward, Melaina at the head.

DM suddenly: “Stop there, Melaina!”

Us immediately: “Oh no!”

She finds a door with a shape carved in it - the gem that Kessler took from the golem looks like it would fit in there. That is not relevant right now, however, as she has charged forward and tripped a trip wire. She fails her Dex save and a giant ballista bolt sticks her for 14 damage. Could have been a lot worse. She decides she’s not doing anything else, even when tempted with a treasure chest; she goes to sit in a corner and sulk.

The treasure chest is on a different island, reachable only via a broken bridge. Kessler suggests throwing the dead spider into the water to distract the Quippers while we jump across.

Do we want to take a short rest first? Yes. Tarragon makes up some Relaxing Bark, allowing everyone to regain a couple of Hit Dice which we roll, and take potions. Ardvack casts Life Transference on Carl again.

We are about to move on when the DM has us all roll a d20. Uh oh. Anyone who got ten or more can get five more HP back, as we burned incense in a temple. Yay!

Matthew, grumbling: “Oh as soon as we get a long rest, you can bet I’m going to be re-summoning Admiral Pancakes…”

Do we want to jump the bridge after the treasure? Is it worth it? Melaina wants to; the rest of us are dubious. How far can she jump with a run-up? Ten feet. She could jump it.

“Alright then, I’ll do it. Whoosh.” Kessler follows her.

Melaina checks for traps - an 8. She can’t see any! Sophie, OOC, resignedly: “Oh, right, okay.”

She checks the chest itself and finds a trap mechanism - some nozzles sticking out of the ground next to the chest. She makes a roll with her thieves tools, and by the skin of her teeth (13) disarms it. It would have been bad; one nozzle would have squirted her with flammable liquid and the other would have set her on fire. She finds a Brooch of Shielding! There is another item, a ring, which seems magical; Kessler takes eleven minutes and casts Identify as a ritual. It’s a ring of Swimming!

Melaina gives the brooch to Ahleqs, as he would almost certainly appreciate anything that would give him some extra protection. We decide to crack on, as it would take another hour for him to attune to it. Besides, the longer we’re down here the more this place sucks so we’re all eager to leave.

Kessler puts the gemstone into the hole in the door and it creaks open; we walk through. We enter some tunnels, which are very claustrophobic after the caverns. It’s very dark. We follow them until we come out into another large cavernous room.

We jump to another map…

There are more islands with about ten foot tall towers with glowing orbs at the top. More water, and a broken stone bridge. (Is anyone reminded of Beverly?)

The bad news is, this room has glowing orb lights, a broken bridge, and more islands. The good news is, it seems quiet enough that we could take a long rest.

Kessler does her Alarm spell, and Carl - not needing to sleep - takes all the watches. We all take turns to watch with him as “his Perception is for shit.”

Kessler takes first, Tarragon takes second, and Melaina third.

Carl and Kessler make Perception checks. A 3 and a 6; oh dear. Kessler thinks she hears water noises, but it could be just the water on the shore.

Then Tarragon and Carl. 13 for Tarragon and a 16 for Carl. We watch some bats flitting about in the light from the strange tower; nothing dangerous, however. Everyone but Tarragon now completes their long rest. She retires, and Melaina and Carl roll Perception.

Carl is on fire tonight; a 17. He makes an Intelligence check - a 9. That’s actually not bad. After about 3 hours he becomes agitated and tries to say something, but can’t. Melaina’s nostrils are assailed with a foul stench; she looks to the water to see something breaking the surface of it. Which means that whatever it is doesn’t get a surprise round…

Melaina and Carl roll initiative. Carl has used all his good rolls on Perceiving. But he’s ready for anything; he’s got his stick.

Whatever is crawling out of the water looks like a troll, but dripping with horrible ichorous black ooze and smelling like a busy harbour at low tide.

Matthew, OOC: “They smell like a bonfire of nappies. No - a burning zoo.”

Melaina hides behind some mushrooms; triggering Kessler’s Alarm spell as she leaves the area (because Kessler didn’t specify otherwise). We all wake, and can roll Initiative next round. Melaina takes aim with her longbow. 19 to hit with Sharpshooter, which does. She gets a nat 1 for her Sneak/Sharpshooter which is only a measly 25 total, plus her bow’s damage of 9 for 34. The thing lets out a howl, which would have woken us if the Alarm spell hadn’t.

It approaches us. It’s wearing a loincloth; small mercies.

Everyone but Ardvack and Melaina makes CON saves as the troll runs a filthy claw down its own forearm for a venom spray attack. Gideon and Tarragon take 18 poison damage and are poisoned. The others take half damage and are not poisoned. Now it does its multi-attack.

It has a bite at Tarragon but misses, then a claw at Kessler and misses. Then it claws at Gideon, and misses again. Ha!

Another one shambles up, but doesn’t attack yet. It’s Carl’s turn; he uses his zombie agility to run up to one of the trolls and give it a good old Slam - “Classic Slam - ” and uses his Zombie Grab to try and grapple it. They make contested STR checks - Carl wins even with a 14. The bad news is that part of the troll’s corpulence is ruptured, emitting a black foul ichor into the air - Tarragon and Kessler take more damage as it, however unintentionally, does an Acid Splash.

“… Thanks Carl.”

Melaina goes first. She goes to move but takes 15 Force damage from the towers. What??? Sophie OOC, to Matthew: “Honey, I’m being shot by the nasty tower.” She was just inside its range. She shoots one of the trolls. She hits, and causes another Acid Splash. Tarragon has just woken up from a Long Rest, and is now under half HP. Melaina does do 34 damage to the troll though.

Gideon, with advice from Matthew, casts Grease under the troll that Carl is *not* grappling. This seems a classic ‘Grease’ situation. It rolls a DEX save, and fails, falling prone.

Tarragon casts Lesser Restoration on herself, ending the Poisoned effect, Rages, and steps out of range of the Venom spray.

Ahleqs screams the incantation for Mage Armour, and steps back also. Kessler’s turn, and she will risk stepping back. One is restrained and the other prone, so no attack of Opportunity. She takes out her crossbow and shoots at the one grappled by Carl. 20 hits for 11 piercing damage. “And I will shoot that sucker again.” 17 also hits for 7 damage. She drinks one of her potions; wise.

Carl takes 18 poison from Kessler’s attacks on the troll, but he’s immune to poison. Carl has the Grappler feat, so even though the troll is a size larger than him it doesn’t get Advantage on the Strength check to free itself. They roll straight Strength checks - Carl rolls a ten, and the troll rolls a 6, even with a plus four modifier.

The prone one uses half its movement to stand up and moves forward, biting at Kessler - 26 to hit. It actually hits her! Even Shield won’t do it! She takes 6 piercing and 6 poison damage, and is poisoned until the start of the troll’s next turn.

It claws twice at Tarragon; “Bring it.”

24 hits, the ten doesn’t. Ten slashing (halved to 5) and 6 poison (not halved). She’s at 19HP now, and hasn't even attacked yet.

Ardvack wakes up to see the trolls attacking. “Ah. It must be Wednesday.” Matthew, OOC: “Im going to do… something… stupid. Or… brilliant.” Seeing the damage Tarragon and Kessler have taken, he heals Tarragon for 11HP. She blinks with surprise, and he backs up.

We call it there as it's getting late...

[skullnbones4444]

Day 1 Food Log

Breakfast -

Mushroom broth (1 cup) - 5 cals

Homemade iced oat milk latte - 130 cals (probably going to start doing black coffee or green tea :( )

Lunch -

Rice cake - 60 cals

Green tea - 0 cal

China Skinny Tea (Senna lax) - 0 cals

Dinner -

Mint chocolate protein bar :( - 280 cal

China Skinny Tea (Senna lax) - 0 cals

LaCroix - 0 cals

Total = 480 cal (my goal was 100 ugh)

Exercise

At home - 100 cals minus (Body weight)

Gym - 250 cals minus (12-3-30)

Total = 350

Sad because I ate the mint chocolate protein bar :( ordered some safe foods to the apartment tomorrow. Deleted UberEats, Postmates, etc., all those bad apps. Sad because I’m so fat.

Relapse number 3 - this time with intention

CW: 143 🤮

GW: 105

UGW: 85

LW: 88 (ED 1), 108 (ED 2), 113 (ED 3)

I want to be strong and in control again :( I hate myself so much. I feel like I don’t even eat that much and I’m still this fucking fat. I don’t know what is wrong with me.

Considering fasting tomorrow.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #363

(one more that’s a late upload from way earlier in the day, and i yet again don’t feel like updating the answers)

What brings out the worst in you? When I'm very anxious or having a PTSD episode, I can become very snappy and just not a joy to be around. What all did you eat today? This morning I had oatmeal, I had a rice cake as a snack, and lunch was ham and cheese on a tortilla. Some people were really destructive as a child, were you? No, I was a good kid. Who was the last person you were in a car with? My mom. Who was the last person you cried in front of? It was probably Mom. Do you talk about your feelings or hide them? I usually talk about them somewhere, like in surveys if I feel I can't with anyone else. Please be vocal with your feelings. It is so destructive to let them build up. Who was the last person you were with that smelled REALLY good? I'm unsure. Do you know anyone that is gothic? A good number of people, myself included at least in spirit. ;~; I can't really afford good attire, nor do I have the patience for so much makeup maintenance. Have you seen UP? I actually haven't seen the full movie, but I'd like to. How is your mom? Stressed as fuck and tired of everything. What color hair does your mom have? She recently dyed it black. Her hair is growing back totally gray now and she hated it. She's gotten so self-conscious as she's aged. When was the last time you were told you were cute? Idk. Do you feel comfortable getting up and giving speeches? FUCK NO. Have you ever dipped french fries in a frosty? I tried it once and did not get the appeal. Did you have school/class today? No. My school endeavors are done. Do you have any paintings in your room? If so, of what? Yeah, I have my big painting of meerkats grooming above all my 'kat plushies. Have you ever had your photo professionally taken? As a child and by school photographers, anyway. Would you prefer eating jello or pudding? Pudding. After washing your hair, do you put any products in it? No. Last time you ate a salad? Like a week ago when we went to Ichiban for my sister's bday. Do you know how old your house is? No, I don't. Have you ever been described as ”adorable”? Yeah. Have you ever given a lap dance? No. They seem incredibly awkward to me?? Would you accept a boring job if it meant you would make mega bucks? No. I can't do a job I hate for anything. I would be so depressed. Are you a moody person? Yes. What are you listening to? I'm watching Gab Smolders' new episode of Resident Evil 8: Village. I'm deadass watching four different LPers play it, I'm only moderately obsessed lmao. What video game could you waste the most time on? WoW, given it has like a zillion different things to do. Yet I still get bored lmao. What is your favorite condiment? Maybe Ketchup? I think I use that for the most things. What is the worst thing that you have ever done? I don't feel like getting into this. How old were you when your parents gave you the "birds and the bees" talk? They didn't; I learned in my school's sex ed in the 5th grade. Have you ever questioned whether or not you'd benefit from therapy? I have benefited from it. What would you like it to say on your gravestone? Hypothetically, idk. But I'd rather be cremated. Would you ever wear real leather or animal fur? NO. Have you ever completely failed a year of school and had to repeat a grade? No. Have you ever been bitten by an animal that wasn't a cat or a dog? Which? I think my old baby iguana bit me once or twice, not that it was very painful at her young age. I can't recall another animal. What type of literature are you most likely to read? (book, magazine, etc) Books. Do you prefer using candles, wax melts, or incense? Incense. Are you someone who actually doesn't have a Facebook? No, I have one. What kind(s) of Facebook groups are you active in, if any? I'm not really *active* in any; I just observe them and interact via "like"s. I'm actually in a whole lot of groups, though. Do you enjoy any herbal or fruit teas? What kinds? Neither. Do you hear any animals right now? No. What are your thoughts on Avenged Sevenfold? I know and like a few songs, especially "Dear God." Do you like Batman? Yeah, I like his "refuse to murder" ideology. The only thing is I kinda have a bad connection attached to him, because Batman was Jason's thing. Have you ever played fetch with a dog? Yes. Does your house have a fireplace? Yeah actually, but it might be fake? I don't even know lol. Have you ever pet a stingray? No. Have you ever dissected a baby pig in a class at school? Oh my god, no. I literally could never. I did dissect a frog in the 7th grade that wound up to be pregnant, though... I wasn't happy about it, but at the same time it was very interesting. Who is the last baby you held? My niece. Do you like Sunkist? The orange kind is fine, but the STRAWBERRY flavor? Jfc I love that shit. Would you ever consider being a cannibal? UM NO Do you have any scars from an animal? I have a lot of scars on my hands from playing with Roman. I scar extremely easily, so just his little scrapes leave marks. Have you ever seen an Igloo? No. Do you like Korn? Love 'em. How many animals do you have? Really two, but we have three in the house right now. Idk when this dog is going away. Are you more afraid of tornadoes or hurricanes? Tornados. Ever rode in a helicopter? No. Do you like rabbits? Yes, they're adorable. Do you like mushrooms? NO. What was the last movie you cried at? I want to say Logan, but I'm not sure. I watch movies so rarely that I really don't know. Would you rather work for a small or large company? Small. I'd feel more useful. What is the rudest thing a guy has ever done to you? I don't know. Have you ever read the book 13 Reasons Why? Yeah. I thought it was good, but now I don't remember like... anything about it. What did you have for breakfast this morning? I had apple and cinnamon oatmeal. How many times have you read your favorite book? Just once. I don't re-read books. Have you ever been on Omegle? No. Are you still in love with one of your exes? "In love," no. Do you think being born was a mistake? Yeesh, no. Has a relative ever been arrested? My psychotic uncle (by marriage) has been. Was it a serious crime? Quite honestly, I don't remember. I just know he's an angry and dangerous motherfucker. Do you think the Fountain of Youth exists? No. How about in a parallel dimension? Doubtful. Do you believe humans are part of a giant alien experiment? I ponder over the possibility of being a research simulation, kind of like a much advanced version of The Sims, but I honestly doubt it. Have you ever been suicidal? Yes. Was it a passing phase or is it something controlled by medication? Therapy and medication saved me. Is there a holiday you wish no one celebrated? Which is it? Why do you feel that way? Fight me about Christopher Columbus Day. He didn't discover shit. Have you taken any writing classes? How about art? I've taken a writing course in college, and I've taken loads of art classes. What’s your all-time favourite band? How about all-time fave singer? Ozzy Osbourne; Freddie Mercury. What three songs do you want played at your funeral? Why those particular songs? "Like A Woman" by Alice Cooper, "Life Is Beautiful" by Sixx A.M., and "Angels on the Moon" by Thriving Ivory. I just like them and find them suiting. Do you think most mythological creatures exist? No. Have you ever had lice? No. What is one superstition that freaks you out? Why is that? I’m not superstitious. Are either of your parents retired yet and if not, what do they do? No. Dad is a mailman, and while Mom doesn't ~officially~ work yet because she's recovering from intense cancer treatment, she very recently resumed lightly cleaning a church for a small payment. Kinda like a warmup. When did you or do you want to move out of your parents’ house? I wanna move out once I'm in a long-term, stable relationship with someone so we can live together. Me living alone is NOT a good idea. How do you like your current job, or if you’re unemployed, have you been looking for employment? I don't have a job, but when I go to my tattoo appointment, I'm going to ask them if they'd be interested in hiring someone for the front desk. I think it's def something I could do because I love the environment, there's really not that much I need to know (like where the Doritos are, dealing with exact change, answering a dozen unique questions), it's not insanely busy, and the occasional phone call would challenge my anxiety and just be a minor inconvenience to me until I got used to it. My partial hospitalization program really got me wanting to fight back against what gives me anxiety, to truly expose myself to what scares me, while not going totally overboard with it. It was encouraging to hear my therapist there thought it was a magnificent idea for me. I decided I wanted to ask while at the parlor getting work done to show serious interest (like I'm not just some random chick walking in and asking for a job), as well as let the people warm up to me. I'm trying not to get my hopes up too much, but damn am I wishing. I want it so badly. What kind of booze did you last take shots of? I've never taken shots.