#neil: you know i get it

[kevinmonth]

i know this is probably common knowledge but i had completely forgotten that the riko roast happens after riko insults neils mother. like up until then neil is trying to hold himself back, admittedly not very well but he's trying. then riko calls his mother a coward and he loses it

[shadesofmauve]

I want to step away from the art-vs-artist side of the Gaiman issue for a bit, and talk about, well, the rest of it. Because those emotions you're feeling would be the same without the art; the art just adds another layer.

Source: I worked with a guy who turned out to be heavily involved in an international, multi-state sex-slavery/trafficking ring.

He was really nice.

Yeah.

It hits like a dumptruck of shit. You don't feel stable in your world anymore. How could someone you interacted with, liked, also be a truly horrible person? How could your judgement be that bad? How can real people, not stylized cartoon bogeymen, be actually doing this shit?

You have to sit with the fact that you couldn't, or probably couldn't, have known. You should have no guilt as part of this horror — but guilt is almost certainly part of that mess you're feeling, because our brains do this associative thing, and somehow "I liked [the version of] the guy [that I knew]", or his creations, becomes "I made a horrible mistake and should feel guilty."

You didn't, loves, you didn't.

We're human, and we can only go by the information we have. And the information we have is only the smallest glimpse into someone else's life.

I didn't work closely with the guy I knew at work, but we chatted. He wasn't just nice; he was one of the only people outside my tiny department who seemed genuinely nice in a workplace that was rapidly becoming incredibly toxic. He loaned me a bike trainer. Occasionally he'd see me at the bus stop and give me a lift home.

Yup. I was a young woman in my twenties and rode in this guy's car. More than once.

When I tell this story that part usually makes people gasp. "You must feel so scared about what could have happened to you!" "You're so lucky nothing happened!"

No, that's not how it worked. I was never in danger. This guy targeted Korean women with little-to-no English who were coerced and powerless. A white, fluent, US citizen coworker wasn't a potential victim. I got to be a person, not prey.

Y'know that little warning bell that goes off, when you're around someone who might be a danger to you? That animal sense that says "Something is off here, watch out"?

Yeah, that doesn't ping if the preferred prey isn't around.

That's what rattled me the most about this. I liked to think of myself as willing to stand up for people with less power than me. I worked with Japanese exchange students in college and put myself bodily between them and creeps, and I sure as hell got that little alarm when some asian-schoolgirl fetishist schmoozed on them. But we were all there.

I had to learn that the alarm won't go off when the hunter isn't hunting. That it's not the solid indicator I might've thought it was. That sometimes this is what the privilege of not being prey does; it completely masks your ability to detect the horrors that are going on.

A lot of people point out that 'people like that' have amazing charisma and ability to lie and manipulate, and that's true. Anyone who's gotten away with this shit for decades is going to be way smoother than the pathetic little hangers-on I dealt with in university. But it's not just that. I seriously, deeply believe that he saw me as a person, and he did not extend personhood to his victims. We didn't have a fake coworker relationship. We had a real one. And just like I don't know the ins-and-outs of most of my coworkers lives, I had no idea that what he did on his down time was perpetrate horrors.

I know this is getting off the topic, but it's so very important. Especially as a message to cis guys: please understand that you won't recognize a creep the way you might think you will. If you're not the preferred prey, the hind-brain alarm won't go off. You have to listen to victims, not your gut feeling that the person seems perfectly nice and normal. It doesn't mean there's never a false accusation, but face the fact that it's usually real, and you don't have enough information to say otherwise.

So, yeah. It fucking sucks. Writing about this twists my insides into tense knots, and it was almost a decade ago. I was never in danger. No one I knew was hurt!

Just countless, powerless women, horrifically abused by someone who was nice to me.

You don't trust your own judgement quite the same way, after. And as utterly shitty as it is, as twisted up and unstead-in-the-world as I felt the day I found out — I don't actually think that's a bad thing.

I think we all need to question our own judgement. It makes us better people.

I don't see villains around every corner just because I knew one, once. But I do own the fact that I can't know, really know, about anyone except those closest to me. They have their own full lives. They'll go from the pinnacles of kindness to the depths of depravity — and I won't know.

It's not a failing. It's just being human. Something to remember before you slap labels on people, before you condemn them or idolize them. Think about how much you can't know, and how flawed our judgement always is.

Grieve for victims, and the feeling of betrayal. But maybe let yourself off the hook, and be a bit slower to skewer others on it.

[tankuare]

Neil Josten said “I want to see you lose control” and we expected Andrew to recover from that???

[inafieldofstarflowers]

I just re-read The Foxhole Court and for the first time I noticed the parallels between Wymack’s speech about Kevin’s time at the nest and THE Riko roast in book 2:

Wymack: “[Tetsuji] raised Kevin to be a star” // Neil: “Being raised as a superstar must’ve been really, really difficult for you”

Wymack: “Kevin isn’t human to them. He’s a project” // Neil: “Always a commodity, never a human being”

Wymack: “He put a lot of time and money into kevin’s development on the court. As far as Tetsuji is concerned, Kevin is valuable property. Any profit Kevin makes is rightfully the Moriyamas’” // Neil: “Not a single person in your family thinking you’re worth a damn off the court”

Wymack: “Kengo and Ichirou mostly keep to New York and couldn’t give a flying fuck what Tetsuji and Riko do” // Neil: “Kevin and I talk about your intricate and endless daddy issues all the time”

In my opinion, this is significant for two main reasons.

First, as Wymack says, “Kevin doesn’t talk about his time at Evermore,” so Neil didn’t get this information from HIM. This is part of why the “Kevin and I talk about your intricate and endless Daddy issues all the time” is so funny, because you know Kevin is sitting at that table losing his MIND at being implicated in this, but this speech means those claims are based on something.

Second, and I think more importantly, Neil is turning everything Wymack told him was true of Kevin onto Riko. On the Kathy Ferdinand show, Neil implies that Kevin is better than Riko, and that Riko knows it and is scared of it—“people are finally going to know which one of you is better. They’re going to know how premature [the facial tattoo] was.” In the Riko Roast (TM), he’s continuing to make that insinuation by basically saying “hey, all those things you think about Kevin? All that dehumanization? It’s true for you, too. Only Kevin got out and you’re still there, and we see that and talk shit because of it.” He’s not just knocking Riko down, he’s building Kevin up while he does it, because in this scenario, Kevin is one of the people on the outside seeing how pitiful Riko is, while Riko is just a guy everyone thinks is annoying, and who should just shut up.

[foxstens]

andrew handpicks robin for the foxes and robin becomes the last official member of the monsters and andrew gives robin his bed and robin sits with andrew and neil on the couch and andrew gives robin his knives and nicky leaves robin a key to the columbia house and robin becomes neil's best friend in neil's fifth year and wymack makes robin vice-captain then captain

[thatcrimsonsun]

[falafels]

pt.25!! <pt.24 pt.26>

french translation (please correct me if you know better as my french has got holes in it):

-can we do it again soon?

-get a grip, kevin. yes.

tag gang!! @andrewsleftarmband @blurryhour @you-know-i-get-itt @notexactlythatgirl @strangeoffputtingrat @tessasilverswan @minyard-05 @carbon-dated-gal @bisexualchaosdemon @stormiiflies @watercoloureyes01 @vampire-overlord @iron-sides @azure-wing @buffalo-fox @ohgodnotagainplease @pink-hydrangea @jaywalkerss @ohmynoggin-blog @cosmic-marauder @min-getoutofmy-yard @plazybones @disastersappho @leestars13 @the-witch-forever-lives <333

[theredviper]

MAKE ME CHOOSE:

— @perotovar asked: spawn astarion or ascended astarion

[deadpoets]

DEAD POETS SOCIETY (1989) dir. Peter Weir

[sickofthis666]

This stratospheric level of egoism is mindblowing and disturbing to me.

As someone with diagnosed with PTSD, no, being deceived by an author you never met is not trauma. You can’t call every uncomfortable or painful experience trauma. You’re making the word lose impact and meaning.

"He violated us too" No. How tonedeaf can you be? How tactless? Making someone's else rape about you? No, you haven't been violated. He didn’t put his fucking hands on you. Those two experiences are not even remotely comparable, and the fact that you think they are is seriously worrying. You mentioned talking to your therapist about it— yeah, you really should.

"Time to grieve" no one died. The actual, real victims deserve to grieve the life and peace of mind they lost.

I'm not saying you can’t feel betrayed by an author you loved for a long time, but the least you could do is not make someone's else rape about you.

[koshercosplay]

Neil gaiman is a Zionist :(

this is so funny because if you google "neil gaiman zionist" nearly all of the links are to unsourced tumblr posts or responses to a single tweet from 2015 that just acknowledges Israel's existence

I see gaiman has once again committed the heinous crime of Being Jewish When Israel Is In The News

[emry-stars-art]

(Op of the text post is no longer in the fandom/no longer wishes to be so I didn’t tag, and I’m hesitant to say to flood their notifs! Let’s be respectful but I wanted to give this its dues lol)

I literally have been thinking about this text post for a full year and it’s FINALLY TIME. Happy Halloween 🎃

[ninyard]

I know Seth’s existence is a controversial topic because he’s so widely disliked but just think about it for a second. I think Seth would’ve grown to like Neil if he hadn’t been killed.

Like. Blood in the locker. Seth would laugh so hard and everyone would be like dude…stop laughing this is serious and he’s standing there like???? Are you KIDDING ME??? Neil is covered in BLOOD and turns out he’s lying about his age and probably so much more and you expect me NOT to laugh?

Neil’s lies would be so amusing to him. Him fighting Riko would be his favourite thing ever. Like in tfc he was so intrigued by Neil roasting Riko on TV, he literally wished he had went with them just so he could’ve witnessed it. I think Neil’s attitude would make Seth laugh so hard because he’s unintentionally bratty and argumentative and he literally can’t keep himself out of trouble. I’m not saying they’d be friends but I think he would love that little striker with an attitude problem that’s all!

[thespineoftherighteous]

whenever Andrew or Neil are talking about Kevin to the other they refer to him as "your boytoy"

[saga-child]

Happy 18th Anniversary of Neil “You know, I get it,” Josten!

** During a recent reread of TFC and TRK, I went through and marked the dates of significant events. According to what I was able to gather, I think the 2006 Fall Banquet fell on September 9th. So, celebrate accordingly!

[johnconstantinesdick]

Jeanneil fake besties of all time. Kings of committing to the bit. Neil could say whatever and Jean would (rightfully) assume it’s part of a scheme to keep them alive and would corroborate immediately.