#negativity and feeling useless and all

[shyrule]

i need someone to affectionately bonk me on the head with a paper roll or alternatively a metal pole

[byanyan]

mmmmmmm not feeling good today

[naomiknight-17]

I post about the cost of groceries destroying me and I nearly immediately get an ask begging me to help spread someone else's fundraiser

Either you're a spammer or you really can't fucking read the room, huh

[borgialucrezia]

dysfunctional families, generational traumas and a self-loathing father who sees himself in his son and cannot forgive him for it. this show really went off with all the top-tier themes lol truly unmatched.

that being said, what cesare doesn't realize is that despite his father 'favoring' juan, it's cesare whom his father truly trusts. sadly, it took cesare killing juan for rodrigo to set him free from being a cleric. if he only knew that his father plainly relies on him and has plans something ultimately much greater, cesare wouldn't have envied and hated his younger brother, and things wouldn't have led to juan's death.

rodrigo made cesare believe that he wasn't truly loved by him when in reality, he does love cesare immensely and admires him for his drive and ambition. however, rodrigo chose to be self-deluded and ashamed of admitting it. he appointed juan a task that cesare has always wanted, despite knowing well that cesare is infinitely better suited for it. this resulted in cesare developing a strong hatred and envy toward juan.

as for juan's case, he never asked for the position he was given, but he tried his best to fulfill his responsibilities. (like when he showed bravery by willingly risking his life against the french, even after his troops were torn apart, but only surrendered because the prospect of him dying would upset lucrezia) despite his father's love, juan felt deeply isolated because he never had a peer. he was good natured and had a deep love for his family, and all he wanted was to be included in their world. however, he struggled immensely in expressing his feelings, which led to him being shunned and his death going unmourned. it is tragic because ultimately he longed to feel like a 'true' borgia and have a close relationship with his family, especially with cesare. but the lack of moral guidance and the weight of expectations pushed him to behave inappropriately, resulting in everyone pushing him away.

in conclusion, rodrigo was too blinded by his own ambitions and dismissed his children's concerns it's why i can't bring myself to blame neither of them, they were all trapped by their father's ambitions and favoritism, he was the one who unintentionally pit them against each other by making both of his sons feel inadequate in the positions he bestowed upon them.

[dunmertwink]

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[meadowlarkx]

One of my favorite things about the worldbuilding in The Left Hand of Darkness is the "perverts" in Gethenian society—those who are permanently in one of the kemmer forms. The "normal" person on Gethen goes through a kemmer cycle with periods of somer, but that's not every Gethenian. People whose bodies don't work this way get treated with repulsion. Genly compares them to "homosexuals" in his society, and that comparison is really instructive. Gethenians may not have gender roles and identities the way we do, but they do have societal norms, including about bodies and sexuality. And those norms leave people out. They are imperfect and sometimes they are unfair. I think this is part of the point.

In subtle ways, this theme is woven throughout the book's descriptions of Gethenian cultures. To stick to sexuality, something similar can be said about the different norms surrounding incest on Gethen and the empathic treatment of Estraven's past relationship with Arek. There is no taboo about incest between siblings on Gethen, only on siblings vowing kemmering, but if a child is born of it, the parents have to separate (and it seems like Estraven is separated from Sorve because of this). The reason for including this element, in my reading, isn't to impose our own moral standards by "showing" that Estraven's relationship with Arek was "bad" (in fact, we learn fairly little about it, beyond that Estraven cared deeply for him.) Instead, I think it's partly to demonstrate the dissonance between Gethenian mores and our own, and unsettle both. Because, like Genly, we see Gethenian norms as strange, we can notice that they bring about particular situations and cause particular hurts. Even the custom of vowing kemmering monogamously for life, which sounds more familiar, is shown as double-edged. Estraven breaks a taboo by making his "false" vow to Ashe, but was trying to build a new life with Ashe really wrong?

These things are not 1:1 to any "real life" issue, but like everything else in this story, I think they're chosen because they are provocative. It's really meaningful to me that even in terms of gender and sexuality, Gethen isn't painted as a utopia, but as a real place. Le Guin shows us two sets of norms and asks us not just "are our norms arbitrary and/or constructed rather than essential truths?" but also "are norms always socially constructed? Should we question them sometimes? What harm is done to maintain them? Who is being left out?"

[seventh-district]

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[theladygazingatemptiness]

one of these days I'm just going to wipe my whole entire digital footprint off the internet disconnect the wi-fi from everything I own destroy/change every piece of ID and contact info I have find a secluded cabin in a forest to live in and then drop off the face of the Earth never to be found or heard from again

[rubiesintherough]

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[wereh0gz]

Hm. Feelings of inadequacy are hitting hard rn

[janiedean]

will get to all your lovely replies asap but for now let me get down the mood with my usual

fuck but i really do hate this month and everything it represents or better the fact that each single year it gets just more miserable

[silverselfshippingchaos]

man.. shipping with characters from movies is so hard..

[girl-bateman]

My number one loser behaviour is hate-watching this one fuckass sims youtuber until I get so angry that I have to turn it off before the adrenaline makes me pull an all-nighter

[binnie]

seriously considering making a mental health blog

[crimeronan]

honestly if i'd read dreamer trilogy first and you then told me that the trc character i'd relate to most would be adam........ i would straight-up hit u with a truck.

[kidfoundonstreets]

yeahwhat it all really comes down to is that i hate myself isnt it.