#negative impact of social media on youth

[seohabibi]

In the digital age, social media has become an integral part of the lives of young individuals. However, as its presence grows, so does the need to examine its effects on the mental well-being of the youth. This exploration delves into the intricate relationship between social media usage and mental health, shedding light on the potential benefits and drawbacks. From fostering connections to the risks of comparison and cyberbullying, this examination aims to provide a comprehensive understanding of how social media shapes the mental health landscape for the younger generation.

[necroromantics]

How To Write ASPD / Psychopathy

half educational, half ramble. dedicated to the creepypasta fandom.

(check out my how-to-write bipolar + ticci toby here)

What is ASPD?

Antisocial Personality Disorder (ASPD) is characterized by a disregard for others rights and feelings. It's a personality disorder, which means the mindsets and behaviours associated with this condition are deeply ingrained and maladaptive.

The current DSM-5 diagnostic criteria states that to be diagnosed with ASPD, a patient needs to have a long-term (occurring since at least age 15), consistent, and persistent history of three or more of the following:

failure to conform to social norms; repeatedly breaking rules/laws that may be grounds for arrest

deceitfulness; lying, tricking others for personal gain

impulsivity or a failure to plan ahead

irritability and aggression; fighting, hostility, outbursts

reckless disregard for the safety of self or others

irresponsibility; repeated failure to comply to work or financial obligations

lack of remorse; being indifferent to or rationalizing having mistreated or hurt others

ASPD, by definition, can only be diagnosed in people who are 18+. Minors cannot have ASPD due to treatment and intervention reasons. A minor who exhibits traits of ASPD will be diagnosed with Conduct Disorder.

At it's core, though it may seem like people with ASPD are just hostile and insensitive and rude, is a defense mechanism formed in childhood, typically in response to an abusive environment. Self-preservation and a "dog eat dog world" mindset are very common in those with ASPD. Everything is about doing what it takes to retain social dominance, control, and ultimately safety. Boredom and risk-taking is also very common in people with ASPD, and many people with this condition have never had proper, healthy influences in childhood to teach them proper manners, social norms, morals, or how to regulate their emotions and aggression.

It is a chronic condition that affects about 1-3% of the population. Its very prevalent in the prison population as well. ASPD not only causes a person to potentially cause harm to others, but is a condition that very negatively impacts the patients themselves.

(Note: The term "sociopathy" is typically used to refer to an extreme presentation of ASPD. "Psychopathy" may sometimes be seem as a very very extreme presentation of ASPD)

What is Psychopathy?

Psychopathy refers to a set of traits/issues that might be seen in patients. It is NOT a diagnosis. If psychopathic traits cause dysfunctional behaviour in an individual, they will most likely be diagnosed with ASPD.

Psychopathy is now most commonly used in research settings to use it as a term that describes certain patterns and behaviours. It is something professionals study, not diagnose.

The traits related to psychopathy are:

manipulative behaviour; superficial charm, persistent lying, deceiving others

grandiose sense of self

lack of remorse or guilt; lack of empathy, callousness, shallow emotional expressions

reckless lifestyle; need for stimulation, parasitic (constantly takes from others), lack of realistic long-term goals, impulsivity

antisocial behaviour; poor behavioural control, early behavioural problems, trouble with the law in youth

Not all psychopathic people fit the criteria for ASPD, not all are disordered by their traits, and not all people with ASPD are considered psychopathic. But there is a very big overlap.

Psychopathy is typically only recognized in a forensic or research setting. It is often wrongfully used in the media to describe people who are serial killers, abusive, or used to dehumanize others.

Personally, I believe that media and creators need to move away from the terms psychopath/sociopath. They have far too much negative connotation that only exists to demonize people who suffer with unconventional traits. If you want to write psychopathy correctly, do your research on what it looks like in its presentation, and just drop the label.

What are some harmful tropes with ASPD/Psychopathy in media?

ASPD and Psychopathy have been tossed around in many different settings as ways to cheaply create an evil villain, or a cold calculated monster, or a reckless criminal. There has been only one instance in my lifetime of watching hundreds of movies and shows that I have seen an accurate, humanizing portrayal of ASPD. (That show is House MD by the way, I highly recommend if you want to see good representation).

So what are some of the tropes to acknowledge and avoid?

1. Psychopathic serial killer

Have you seen American Psycho? Great movie. Don't do that. While the character Patrick Bateman is commonly associated with the terms "narcissist" and "psychopath", he also is a satirical character who is a very dramatized and exaggerated presentation of some psychopathic traits.

I will be honest. A lot of real-life serial killers do suffer from various mental health conditions, but correlation is not causation. In the Creepypasta fandom we are surrounded by different characters who are almost all serial killers, and people like to make things easy and just throw the label of "psychopath" onto them and call it realistic. This is very cheap, and very harmful.

If you want to write a psychopathic serial killer character, then acknowledge how harmful, fear-mongering, and dehumanizing this trope is towards people who actually suffer from these traits.

2. ASPD synonymous with abusive behaviour

ASPD is a disorder that does cause people to do and say things that will harm others in some way. Cluster B personality disorders are commonly seen as 'social disorders', as in they cause dis-order in interpersonal relationships, and in response to society. Borderline personality disorder (BPD) for example may cause somebody to threaten harm to themselves in response to percieved abandonment, or to have intense fights due to emotional dysregulation.

ASPD in particular may cause someone to be insensitive towards others problems, lack morality, be aggressive or hostile, put others down, or get into reckless situations. This is why they are disorders. Because they cause significant and serious problems in the persons life.

It is not pretty, and it's not fair, and yes, people with disorders may cause harm to others due to behaviours associated with their condition. But there is a difference between causing harm, and abusing another person.

Lying to someone is not inherently abusive. Being reckless is not inherently abusive. Being an insensitive asshole is not inherently abusive. To not understand the nuance and the complexity of these situations is to completely demonize and stigmatize a serious mental health condition. You don't call people with BPD abusive for their actions inherently, because you acknowledge they are hurting and only doing what they know to cope with this hurt. Of course it's unhealthy. That's what a disorder is. That does not make someone abusive by default. Anyone with any condition, even neurotypical people can be abusive.

3. Cold, emotionless robot

People with ASPD can and do feel emotion. People with psychopathic traits can and do feel emotion. They get sad, disappointed, disgusted, happy, excited, jealous, hurt, angry. There is nothing in the ASPD criteria that states anything about emotional presentation or experience.

In psychopathy, it is mentioned that there may be a shallow emotional expression. This may also be present in ASPD. This means that while a person will feel emotions, it is either beat down or brushed off, or completely repressed. The emotional repression may come from childhood abuse where they were punished for expressing emotions, or expressing emotions had caused them harm.

Lacking emotions/emotional expression is instead highly linked to Schizoid Personality Disorder, and is apart of the criteria for said disorder.

Media protraying people with ASPD/psychopathy as cold, emotionless, calculating robots is another trope used to dehumanize people with mental health issues. It's used to make people with ASPD seem evil or not having feelings that could be hurt. In reality, nearly everything a person with ASPD does, is their dysfunctional way of protecting themselves from being hurt.

People with ASPD may lack the emotional capacity for things such as empathy and remorse, though. Its common that they are unable to care for, or feel upset for others suffering. They may also be unable to feel guilt. This criteria is seen in about 51% of people with ASPD and is associated with more extreme presentations.

Do you headcanon anyone to have ASPD?

Yes, but I don't like to use the label on them. I do write a lot of antisocial mindsets into my headcanons for Ticci Toby, and I heavily write ASPD into my OC, Tobin.

For Toby, his presentation of ASPD comes in the form of rebellion, not understanding/following social norms, recklessness, and a strong desire for power, dominance, and control. I write this as his subconscious response to the trauma he faced in childhood. As a child Toby was constantly put down and made to feel small and powerless at the hands of his father. In order to make sure his father abused only him and not his mother and sister, Toby would act out and be a troublemaker. I think that he would have a lot of ASPD behaviours and views on the world.

For my OC Tobin, he's pretty similar in presentation in regards to power/control, and not following social norms. He is very prone to justifying and rationalizing his behaviours to the point he doesn't feel remorse for the harm he causes. Tobin grew up in a very unstable and abusive environment where, like Toby, he did what he needed to do to get by. He never learned proper morals, norms, regulation, etc. But Tobin does care about others. He takes care of his little sister, and loves his girlfriend, and is very protective. Tobin is still a complex human being with more to him than just being an antisocial insensitive prick.

How can I write a character with ASPD?

Do proper research. Not on Reddit, or Quora, or WebMD. I mean go find trusted, scholarly articles and read real scientific papers and studies on ASPD. Do research into how/why it forms, the mindsets, the symptoms and their presentation, the neuroscience even.

Humanize your characters. While it's fun to throw around a bunch of negative and toxic traits to a character you want people to see as 'bad', it's lazy character development. Give them good, positive traits as well. People are very complex, and nobody will fit in to the mold of good or bad. Make them human enough where someone wont look at your character with ASPD and assume everyone with ASPD are monsters.

But also, don't water down the disorder. ASPD does cause harm to the patient and the people in their life. I've seen it a lot where people will try to fight against stigmatization by completely glamorizing the disorder. "People with ASPD aren't inherently bad! They don't actually hurt others or act hostile or say insensitive things"... Yes we do. And it causes many problems. And that is why its a disorder.

Personally I don't like to throw the ASPD label onto my characters even if I do write them to have ASPD because I feel like it just boxes them in. If you write a character with ASPD, try doing it in a way where a professional would be able to tell they have ASPD without you even mentioning the label.

Remember that ASPD is COMPLEX. It varies vastly in its presentation, its a disorder that is life-consuming and the dysfunctional beliefs and behavioural patterns are deeply ingrained and consistent throughout many different areas in someones life. It's a label to describe preexisting issues. It's something that is highly associated with childhood trauma, and drug addiction, and general suffering for the person dealing with their own chaotic mind.

The biggest problem I see that frustrates me is the way people throw around the terms "psychopath" and "sociopath", especially when someone just wants to add a layer of edginess onto their character. Remember that you are dealing with a condition that real people suffer from every day. If you can't handle it respectfully, and if you would demonize someone with ASPD in real life for acting as your character does, just don't write it in. Keep the label separate. We don't need any more stigmatization and misinformation.

I know this was very long, but it's such a multifaceted and complex issue and I've seen it enough times in the fandom to be frustrated enough to write this. If you have any questions, want more advice or information, please feel free to ask away in my ask box 🔥

[staraxiaa]

porcelain, the afterword:

author's corner/first thoughts.

first and foremost: upon rereading, a scene in this fic holds a lot of similarities to one from dust, diamonds on ao3 by maokitty. (the jealousy scene w the husband where the wall crumbles) especially with the dialogue. i was definitely taking inspiration from that fic while writing the scene, and wanted to make a note of it here. go read it even if ur not into aot pls bc it’s actually life-changing !! i beat my sunflower record btw this was 25k ish words written in less than 20 total writing hours. spread over 1.5 days total. also i think i fucked up the pacing a lot from what id originally planed buuut at least its over. dobby is finally free!!! anyways. the original intent for this fic was a discussion on body imagery, to anyone who has ever struggled with the unrealistic standards of social media and/or felt lesser than themselves because they were not beautiful in a 'typical' manner. but then it ballooned into a monster of its own bc i was like how can i make this hurt. i took my inspiration from porcelain + kintsugi vases... like how can i break this reader before i put her back together. i think that i'd like to touch upon similar topics again one day. as a natural extension of my style and the way i write that 'fits' the childhood theme of this collection, i don't believe i handled these topics the best i could've: a lot of them are simplified to a point that, looking back, makes me go 'eugh' a bit because there's so much depth there that i had to like, tamp down upon as a result of my own inexperience. parts of it were likely believable, and parts of it likely weren't - whether because of my youth, or because i was afraid of approaching these topics from the 'wrong' angle. either way, i hope to be able to grow as a writer to the point that i can tackle these themes again to a point where i myself can be sufficiently pleased with the depth i've put into it. that is all. if you've read up to here, thank you. i'm not really expecting this one to do nearly as well as sunflowers - the content is heavier, it's not nearly as light, and shouto is just less of a popular character overall. but this is very likely my magnum opus so far in terms of how much thought has been put into the work, so it means a lot to me even if you do not interact, and simply read up til this point. thank you. your support truly means a lot. will also update again as i think of things

unwritten scenes, headcanons, thought process

another angst scene. at the todoroki forgiveness dinner table, katsuki and izuku are probably there. i havent watched this scene i just know it exists. (was gonna go find it just for research). enji hits shouto with the 'you can marry whoever you'd like' thing majig. shouto's like, cool i didnt give a shit anyways i was gonna marry her. with or without your permission. and THEN i hit you with the akshually... she's engaged... to be honest, a lot more scenes where it was just mother and daughter. i really wanted the point to hit home that, the mother is always intending to do good in the only ways she knows how - it's not discussed thoroughly, and she's obviously a negative influence when it matters most, which is why reader cuts her off at the end. i am a firm believer that not all parenting is good parenting, even when it comes from a good place, and to me it's like when you hurt someone - it doesn't matter your intention, because that should always come secondary to the fact that you hurt them in some way. sorry. i'm not sure if cutting completely out of the life like that was necessary, but i think that in real life, sometimes it is. something to think abt / regret abt this piece ig lots more on the brother. he was not seen a lot, and i cba to include more about him cuz tbh he's only really relevant for like... 2 scenes but basically the tl;dr is that. he also feels the same pressure. it's just offscreen. (he's a man, he's his father's heir, but he sees the impact this family has upon you). i honestly think he's pookie and hold him dear to my heart but he was really just there to get the plot moving... so.... sorry guys. i didnt even bother to give him a name. BUT hes definitely a very complex character i just didnt write it..... i just needed to add a little happiness to the dysfunctional family ok the husband. okay. so. i originally wrote him in with the intention of being someone to hate, entirely and utterly, with the whole of my heart. but i absolutely hate writing in characters that don't have at least some depth/some complexity, so here goes: he was definitely in love, i think, though i'm not sure i would call it that. there was a grooming aspect to it, an age gap difference (he attended all your recitals/performances when you were underage, had his eye on you), was twice your age. i think i wrote it in a way where it could definitely be interpreted as a form of love, as twisted and fucked up as it was⏤ in the way you think of ownership, that a pretty woman is nothing more than a flower to give the sun to, to water when you'd like. but you're not. you're more than that, you need more than food and water and a roof over your head, more than pretty jewels. you just couldn't love him, and i think that's the part that fucked with him the most. the husband was always supposed to die. i toyed with different versions of this⏤ if you should be the one to kill him, a final 'hurrah' when you finally find your courage. but i thought this wasn't very in line with the reader characterization, so i didn't include this. it's ok though u guys are always #1 bosses in my heart. i hope its clear though that the reader didnt love him at any point bc i dont like him enough as a character to give him that. sorry. he was also supposed to be a mafia man... did i make that clear... but both him and the father were like. i hate these characters. the father especially (he has 0 characterization he's only plot relevant bc he has to be). wipe them both from ur minds pls xx in terms of the baby: i actually know nothing about motherhood. this is only what i've done from the best of my imagination. if it isn't accurate at all i apologize.

i did not know tumblr had a max characters per block. i yap a lot huh. anyways on to cute shouto moments <3 i really considered the idea of like. sex scenes. nothing graphic, but tl;dr with shouto when you cry, he stops immediately. this would be near the end, when you're learning to live again, but it's like, you're so moved because no one has ever done it like this for you before, and he's just worried that he's done something wrong, and it's sad but it's like. you don't know if you can ever handle touch again, but bc you're married, you think it's your duty, and you also love him, so you want to try. you guys love each other so much i could sob. i didnt add this just bc i didnt think this was the fic i wanted to start nsfw with, and bc i dont think i could do the intimacy i wanted justice. also tbh i debated on including more thoughts of shouto during the relationship with the husband but i think, while the mc would definitely think of him, she would try her best to be a good wife. i think this is textbook of abusive relationships (i tried to portray that in the way that the husband speaks and turns the fault onto mc when he hits her) where naturally, they abuse you despite you already doing the best you can, and make you feel lesser for it. i.e. she hasn't thought about shouto the whole while, hasn't done anything, doesn't intend on it, and he still blames her for the way she feels. DID I EMPHASIZE THAT HE PICKS UP EVERY CALL EVEN THO U DONT TEXT HIM ANYMORE JUST IN CASE bc shouto todoroki the man that you are... the man i wrote you as... im never marrying idgaf i write my own standards too high i also jus wanna say guys... the way u pull him out of his shell... and then its his turn to pull him out of urs.... i am a SUCKER for stories that come full circle watch me write it into mermaid au anyways im so excited!!!!! in another world, shouto is the one to catch you. somehow he's in your penthouse apartment. the man's holding a knife to your throat (??) or it's your husband trying to save his own skin. in some variations you walk off the edge yourself, in some variations your husband pushes you, in some variations it's the man. i thought this fit better. either way in all of them he was supposed to dive off the fucking building after u but i also thought: he can't be there himself but he makes sure ur taken care of anyways. sort of fitting the characterization i had for him, i think. i rlly considered a kiss scene too but it'd be sort of natural. like stepping into someone's warmth and feeling entirely comfortable in it, knowing it's what you want and knowing it's also what he wants. at the end. but i didn't add it. wouldve been sweet but unnecessary bc i think this would be further down the line and would require a separate scene. once again i scoot free of my kiss-writing responsibilities ! ! ! more on this, though, i think i really like writing about how simple intimacy can be. i do not believe you need to be physically affectionate with someone to love them, though you certainly can be, and i hope this was reflected in the way i portrayed both shouto and reader. in my dreams we are shouto's sugar babies and just vibe for the rest of our lives. and that is all. the smallest things the reader does make him so happy like. slowly. you guys are already holding hands, so a kiss on the cheek would make him the happiest man on earth. oh here's a bonus scene: at some point he takes you out to see the fireworks. the two of you are sitting, you're tucked snugly into his side, you're watching the fireworks, but when you turn, he's watching you. it's so stupidly romantic. you probably ask him what he's looking at and hes just like 'you'. you flush a little. he kisses the top of your head, grinning like the little shit he is.

i also think it'd take a length of time to get married, so you guys probably do kiss sometime before then. no clue about the scene. but canonically (aka in my head) you guys are just having a normal conversation. like Normal Normal. nothing fancy. and all of a sudden you just lean in and kiss him on the corner of his lips. he touches it, and you can see the shock on his face. dunno if you lie and say 'something there i was just getting it for you' bc im a sucker for that but he only leans a little closer and asks you to do it again. i'd like to think man is patient even tho he desperately wants to (like to the point it's painful to watch) so you have to tell him straight up it's okay to do anything, when you're ready: i.e. initiate kisses and anything else later down the line. once he gets the green light though there's no stopping (he will immediately if u ever tell him) like in my head this man has been basically touch starved all his life and he YEARNS. everyone say thank you to the anon who prompted these scenes btw notes on reader: i think what i wanted to explore with this piece was the way that your parents, the environment you grow up in, the role models you have can shape how you grow a lot. but that does not mean you need to stay that way forever. and that even if you do, you are not necessarily 'weak' or any lesser. reader never actually stood up for herself until the very end, but she was strong in her own way. she tried her best to be a good wife, even when she practically hated her husband. she persevered, she tried her best to love her child. things were bleak, but she pulled through; she kept on living, she kept on breathing. and that was enough. she was enough! <33 i also don't know if this reader was a very believable one. a lot of what i explored here was an extension of some of my own experiences, but like. i simply have not experienced a lot of it personally, unlike with my other pieces, and not at all to the same depth. i hope that there are people out there that can resonate with her and her experiences, but like not in a fucked up way. i simply hope that this story can make someone out there feel seen/heard, even if it's just a little. also putting this here to say, i tried to write reader in a way where it made her thoughts read off as like. ingrained into her? but that the way she thinks is not supposed to be normalized. please love yourselves. just wanted to make that clear djsklsfjd

[simbistardis]

'I am a Black asexual man. Being an asexual Black man, I have personal accounts of being typecast as some sexually perilous human being, solely due to my melanated skin.'

'The social stereotypes surrounding Black men really had a negative impact on my life. It’s even had an impact even after coming out as an ace. So often, asexual media has been dominated by media figures who fit a certain caricature of being white. The majority of asexual documentaries have featured white aces monolithically. I’ve struggled with even accepting that I’m asexual because all the asexual people I saw were white. Black asexuals have been few and far between, let alone Black asexual men. Not having a multicultural asexual representation growing up made it harder for me to truly accept my asexual identity. Not having a multicultural asexual representation made it all the harder to truly counteract the messaging of my youth that said the only way to be a real black guy was to be some “wild beast.”'

Stereotypes & media about Black masculinity made it harder to come out as asexual by Tyger Songbird for LGBTQ Nation (2023)

[allthebrazilianpolitics]

Brazilian Child Influencers Promote Bets, and Addiction Threatens Children and Adolescents

Problem affects young people from various social classes; NGO files complaint against Meta

dvertisements for online casinos, including well-known sports betting sites, are being promoted by child influencers on Instagram. One profile promoting gambling belongs to a six-year-old girl with nearly 3 million followers. This type of betting is spreading across the country and is already affecting children and teenagers, with families and schools beginning to confront the addiction among the youth.

The Alana Institute, an NGO advocating for children and adolescents, filed a complaint last week with the Public Prosecutor's Office regarding illegal casino advertising by children and teenagers on social media. The complaint highlights the highly negative impacts of this addiction on youth, including the risk of suicide.

Continue reading.

[beardedmrbean]

U.S. Surgeon General Vivek Murthy on Monday called on Congress to require a tobacco-style warning for visitors to social media platforms.

In an op-ed published in The New York Times, Murthy said the mental health crisis among young people is an urgent problem, with social media “an important contributor.”

He said his vision of the warning includes language that would alert users to the potential mental health harms of the websites and apps.

"A surgeon general’s warning label, which requires congressional action, would regularly remind parents and adolescents that social media has not been proved safe," he wrote.

In 1965, after the previous year’s landmark report from Surgeon General Luther L. Terry that linked cigarette smoking to lung cancer and heart disease, Congress mandated unprecedented warning labels on packs of cigarettes, the first of which stated, “Caution: Cigarette Smoking May Be Hazardous to Your Health.”

Murthy said in the op-ed, “Evidence from tobacco labels shows that surgeon general’s warnings can increase awareness and change behavior.” But he acknowledged the limitations and said a label alone wouldn't make social media safe.

Steps can be taken by Congress, social media companies, parents and others to mitigate the risks, ensure a safer experience online and protect children from possible harm, he wrote.

In the op-ed, Murthy linked the amount of time spent on social media to the increasing risk that children will experience symptoms of anxiety and depression.

The American Psychological Association says teenagers spend nearly five hours every day on top platforms such as YouTube, TikTok and Instagram. In a 2019 study, the association found the proportion of young adults with suicidal thoughts or other suicide-related outcomes increased 47% from 2008 to 2017, when social media use among that age group soared.

And that was before the pandemic triggered a year's worth of virtual isolation for the U.S. In early 2021, amid continued pandemic lockdowns, Murthy called on social media platforms to “proactively enhance and contribute to the mental health and well-being of our children.”

In January, at a Senate Judiciary Committee hearing about social media’s impact on young people, Meta CEO Mark Zuckerberg apologized to parents who said the Meta platform Instagram contributed to their children’s suicides or exploitation.

“I’m sorry for everything you’ve all gone through,” he said. “It’s terrible. No one should have to go through the things that your families have suffered.”

A surgeon general's public health advisory on social media’s mental health published last year cited research finding that among its potential harms are exposure to violent and sexual content and to bullying, harassment and body shaming.

Murthy also focused in the 2023 advisory on what social media doesn't seem to do: It doesn't always enhance mental health through the proven method of face-to-face interaction.

"For too many children, social media use is compromising their sleep and valuable in-person time with family and friends," he said in a statement last year announcing the health advisory.

At a conference about the youth mental health crisis last month, Murthy said, "It’s no longer the culture for people to talk to each other anymore."

He has been careful to note that research on the matter isn’t conclusive, with much of it finding correlations between time spent on social media and negative mental health effects but without establishing cause and effect.

“More research is needed to fully understand the impact of social media,” he said in the advisory last year.

And he has acknowledged that social media can help teenagers find community, connection and a place for self-expression.

The companies behind the world’s most popular social media platforms had yet to respond to the op-ed Monday.

If you or someone you know is in crisis, call or text 988 to reach the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline or chat live at 988lifeline.org. You can also visit SpeakingOfSuicide.com/resources for additional support.

If you or someone you know is struggling with an eating disorder, visit The National Eating Disorders Association’s website.

[princesscatherinemiddleton]

William and I are absolutely delighted to be with you in Birmingham, on World Mental Health Day, for our Royal Foundation Youth Forum. Mental health is something we both care deeply about. Back in 2016, we launched Heads Together, a campaign supported by so many wonderful partners, that helped break the stigma around mental health, and encouraged more people to have everyday conversations about it. Alongside the efforts of many others, we have seen real change. Today, more people feel empowered to talk about their mental health than ever before. This is a major step forward. William and I continue to be inspired to see young people, like you all here today, leading this charge - being particularly brave in having some of those conversations yourselves. As a generation, you value and talk more about your mental health than any before you - something we truly admire and applaud. It is important, however, to remind ourselves of the big picture as we meet here today. What are we trying to improve by focusing our efforts on mental health? Ultimately, we are working to build a happier, healthier world. We want to shape fairer, safer, kinder, more equal societies - societies that seek the common good and a better future together. For just as we need to restore, protect and invest in our planet, so we must also restore, protect and invest in the communities, relationships and people living on it. We believe that starts with you, our young people, but it also means all of us. Because when you think about it, we can each shape the world in which we live. So, we know, like you, that simply talking about mental health is just not enough. Because although many more conversations are now taking place, it is now vital we spend more time focusing on how we talk about our mental health - and crucially; What are we going to do, to build positive, preventative solutions to one of today's toughest challenges. Positive mental health is shaped by our ability to understand and manage ourselves as individuals, and to connect with others through our relationships, friendships, families and communities. We are living in a world, however, that is changing so fast, where social media and concerns about the threat of conflict, pandemics, climate change or the cost of living, can impact our emotional wellbeing and future hopes dramatically. On top of this, as young people, this can also be a time in your lives, when you perhaps feel the vulnerability of growing independence and self-consciousness. But, by gaining deeper insight into ourselves, we'll be better equipped, to handle the external challenges we all encounter. Today we heard the science and research that backs this up, and how crucial it is, that we develop the skills needed to navigate everything we will face in the future. William and I believe we need to do all we can as a society to help young people develop the emotional and social life skills they need for good mental health, and to thrive in the world around them. Both learning about the world and learning about how to be happy and thrive within it, should go hand-in-hand. So, if we talk about mental health with this in mind, it need not have so many negative connotations. We can choose to see our emotional worlds and mental wellbeing in a different light, we can normalise it and recognise it as something we all have, and require, as human beings. This will be a key focus for us both as we build on Heads Together. Thank you all so much for joining us today. Together, let's build a brighter, more resilient future.

The Princess of Wales | World Mental Health Day 2023

[cursedbyastro]

Hi!! What are your thoughts on the 3rd degree?? Thank you! <3

© cursedbyastro 2022 - all rights reserved

ultimately, the impact the 3rd degree also depends on the other aspects in the chart such as house placement, degree, house cusp gemini rules, 3rd house ruler, mercury influence in the chart, etc.

☆ the 3rd degree is associated with mercury/gemini and therefore maintains some of its qualities making it influential in your chart for whatever it touches and in the chart as a whole 

☆ mercury is associated with the courage to step out of the comfort zone, speaking, learning, adaptability, communicating, versatility, wit, comedic talents, self-expression, expression, intelligence, skillset, social media, transportation, mannerism, gossip, perception, making connections, etc.

☆ the 3rd degree is ruled by gemini’s energy. gemini loves to communicate. so, it may cause you to be more talkative in the areas that this degree touches and makes communicating and expressing oneself whether that be talking, writing, singing, etc. important for the energy it is affecting. 

☆ makes whatever it touches creative as well as skillful. very crafty and versatile  

☆ can cause a sense of quimsical-ness to whatever it touches. it makes whatever it touches, planet or house, for curiosity and exploration. it can also add a child-like/youthful wonder to these energies. this makes them sharp and intelligent in this area because of their constant quest for knowledge. 

☆ you could also have random knowledge for things of this area and/or it is easier to learn things relating to this area

for example, if your moon is in cancer at the 3rd degree, it might be easier for you to relate or understand how others or yourself are feeling, how to care for yourself and others, maybe even cooking. 

☆ due to gemini being an air sign, it adds airy and light energy to even the most stable and grounded ones 

☆ can also indicate a strong connection to the immediate environment, such as the neighborhood or community, and a desire to interact and communicate with others on a daily basis.

☆ could find yourself have specific patterns or having a secret talent in discovering patterns for whatever this degree affects 

☆ can make whatever it touches easy for constant expansiveness and adaptable

☆ you might prefer a fast-paced environment in this area 

☆ gemini is also a business sign. so this degree can show a specialty for marketing and knowing how to utilize information in the best ways 

☆ makes a native unique and different in a way that is charming in this area

☆ can just know things about whatever it touches without really studying; has just a way of knowing things about this subject like little trivia things   

☆ however, they can also struggle with these things as well. 

☆ gemini also represents “two-faced” ness and can cause a very flippant energy switch at any point from being a genius to a mad man 

☆ can cause a lack of rationality for the energies it touches so the native might be more stubborn to see things for as they are instead of what they could be 

☆ it can also make the native more manipulative in this area and sneaky, so it is important to be truthful as lies can get you in more trouble than good in this area

☆ in these areas that the degree touches, it can cause indecisiveness from the magnitude of options presented so it can overwhelm the native.

☆ because of the nature of gemini/mercury, it is easy for the positive and negative to blend or quickly change

[wingswithin]

Cell Phone Addiction | Mental Health - Wings WIthin

 Mobile addiction is a growing concern. It is easy to get addicted to mobile phones but hard to overcome it. Numerous people around the world are addicted to their mobile phones. The behavior pattern of mobile addicts is more or less the same. 

The cell phone is one of the most significant discoveries of the 20th century. According to recent statistics, over 50 crore Indians are using cell phones. While it is true that the advancement of technology has led to many conveniences in our world, it has also brought many other critical issues to us. 

Addiction is a chronic disease and is one of the most intractable health disorders faced around the world. Cell phone addiction is a thriving concern. It is very easy to get addicted to cell phones but difficult to subdue them. A lot of people globally are addicted to their mobile phones. 

NewGen social isolation:

A majority of youths of this generation have become socially isolated because they avoid connecting with people. Thanks to the technology that has turned a vast majority of human beings into impudent fellows. Today, due to cell phone addiction youth tend not to care about their neighbors rather they are more concerned about their online friends across the miles. The internet is a network of online connected servers, desktop computers, laptops and cell phones and societies have no choice than being a part of this network. We keep chasing success when every step of our journey is a success in itself. 

The need of the hour is to guide the kids, students and teens from childhood itself about the disadvantages of the internet. People only post the positive side of their lives including travel, job promotion, lavish dinners with friends, although we are aware that what we see on social media is not completely true. Still it affects us because we end up comparing ourselves with online friends’ standard of living. Either we try to make quick, temporary changes in our lifestyle to feel better or we make an effort to appear better on social media to keep up with our peers. The negative use of the internet in the society is only possible when people don’t know how to use, when to use, what to communicate and what shouldn’t be. People are so deeply involved in the web of the internet that they have no time to spend with their family, friends and relatives which is resulting in losing the social connect leading to them to isolation. 

This condition of being alone increases the risk of mental health problems, negatively impacts the development of the brain’s structure, mental health issues such as depression, dementia, social anxiety and low self-esteem. In severe cases, feeling of helplessness, hopelessness and worthlessness are exact rebated by our isolation and suicidal tendencies increases. To overcome isolation we need to change our habits and behavior. One can try and engage with family and friends, join a group, talk about it with a therapist. After all, all we need is a healthy social network.

Cell phone addiction, What causes it?

The causes of cell phone addiction are numerous. Cell phones are eating the brains of the younger generation through addiction. The main reasons of cell phone addictions are as follows:

Availability of internet: Internet makes things simpler nowadays and will help us to find anything and everything. The Internet is the major factor which provokes people to use cell phones or smartphones more and more.

Functionalities: Cell Phones provide a wide variety of functions or features to its users. Most of the people check their phone for messages and calls if there is no vibration or ring which is in turn termed as addiction.

Gaming: Video games available on the cell phones or smartphones compel the users to use them more. In the modern cell phone/ smartphone market, gaming is shown as an important feature of the phone which has the capability of poisoning the users.

Signs and symptoms that clearly show that a person is addicted to his/ her mobile phone.

You display ritualistic behaviors around your phone. Examples of this may be checking your phone throughout the night when you wake up. Taking your phone to bed until you fall asleep. Checking your phone first thing in the morning as soon as you open your eyes and frequently being caught up in activities on your phone that you struggle to stop.

Spends more time connecting online than connecting with people in real life.

Neglect or trouble completing duties at work, school, or home.

Sleeps with the smartphone on or under the pillow.

Checking peoples’ profiles repeatedly due to anxiety.

Accidents or injury due to phone use while driving.

Appears anxious when the phone battery is low.

Has his or her mobile phone on the table during meals.

Angry or irritated if phone use is interrupted.

Disturbed sleep because of getting up at night to check phone.

Reaching for the phone the moment they are alone or bored.

Phantom vibrations (thinking the phone buzzes when it doesn’t).

Craving access to a smartphone or another device.

FOMO- Fear of missing out.

Loss of control over the behavior. 

Panics if cell phone is misplaced or service is unavailable.

The thought of losing your smartphone genuinely terrifies you.

You obsessively check your phone even when there are no notification noises

Others have expressed resentment or upset at the amount you use your phone

You neglect your family and friends and struggle to stay present in favor of using your phone.

Withdrawal, feeling irritated and anxious when the behavior isn’t practiced. 

Relapse, picking up the habit again after periods of avoidance.

Mental Health Issues of cell phone addiction.

Undoubtedly, smartphones have become integrated into our everyday lives. When you’re glued to your phone, you miss out on quality time with friends or family and exciting experiences. There are other negative effects of excessive cell phone usage, including the following:

-Insomnia 

-Poor school/college performances

-Poor work performance

-Loss of interest in activities 

-Reduced attention and productivity 

-Depression

-Contributes to relationship stress

-Anxiety

How do you break a cell phone addiction:

Mobile phones have been created for our convenience. We must limit their usage to take charge of our lives. If you feel you are getting addicted to your mobile phone then look for ways to get rid of it. When you set healthy boundaries between yourself and your cell phone, you’re more likely to avoid smartphone addiction.

To break cell phone addiction take a ‘Screen Fast’ by:- 

Keeping yourself on a schedule. 

Turn off as many push notifications as possible. 

Take distracting apps off your home screen. 

Kick your device out of bed. 

If you have a smart speaker, put it to use. 

Try turning on your phone's grayscale. 

Stay accountable.

Set rules around your daily smartphone use.

Make your smartphone less appealing.

Practice phone etiquette

Keep phones off the table.

Designate “no cell” zones in your home

Conclusion: 

Mobile addiction is more serious than what we think. People addicted to mobile phones show all or some of the above mentioned symptoms. It is important to take these signs seriously.  Mobile addiction can ruin our life if it is not stopped on time. Getting rid of this habit may be difficult but it is not impossible. As much as we neglect it, mobile addiction has become a big problem today. It is hampering our professional life and ruining our personal relationships. Mobile phones are causing more harm than good. 

People experiencing the problem of mobile addiction must make an effort to get rid of it and return to the real world. To overcome mobile addiction we need to change our habits and behavior. We must help our loved ones going through this problem. We can help them by talking to them about this problem without being judgmental. Express empathy and be open to their negative reactions. It is difficult to cope up with this problem, but the support from family and friends can be really helpful in overcoming mobile addiction. If this does not help, you should not hesitate to seek professional help. Talk about it with a therapist. After all, all we need is a healthy social network. Source: https://www.wingswithin.in/article/cell-phone-addiction

[saintmeghanmarkle]

Harry says the putative children are mindlessly scrolling at ages 5 and 3? Seriously? by u/Von_und_zu_

Harry says the putative children are mindlessly scrolling at ages 5 and 3? Seriously? https://ift.tt/xewn9Hs does anyone take this moron seriously? Aside from having zero qualifications, he has zero credibility. If, as he claims, his tiny children are "mindlessly scrolling" despite their tender years, who put these devices in their hands? Without safeguards? Without limits? Without appropriate supervision? Where is your personal responsibility as a parent Harold? Or, as a perpetual victim, are you accountable for nothing in your life or in your children's lives? Or maybe you know nothing about parenting? Perhaps because you are never actually parenting? Or is this all just a lie? Is it actually you, your wife, and whatever staff you have left doing the "endless scrolling?" You and your wife are obsessed with hunting down every negative thing said about you and every postivie thing said about the RF and sending out the paid online army to "correct/dunter/distract from the misinformation." Get a life and stop lying and lecturing on subjects you are uniquely unqualfied on. You contribute absolutely nothing of value to the social discourse. Presumably this clip is from the "Insight Session:" described as "Harry sits down with social psychologist Jonathan Haidt, author of The Anxious Generation: "Haidt and the Duke of Sussex sat down for the intimate discussion about social media and mental health as part of Harry’s Archewell Foundation 2024 Insight Sessions—public conversations, highlights of which appear in a new Insight Report—about the impact of technology, with the voices of youth front and center." Feisty Energy posted about the "Insight Session" yesterday as reported in Fortune Mag: https://ift.tt/KBYGdLa. I will link the post in the comments as reddit will not let me do it in the post. post link: https://ift.tt/EsBgXf7 author: Von_und_zu_ submitted: October 11, 2024 at 12:02PM via SaintMeghanMarkle on Reddit disclaimer: all views + opinions expressed by the author of this post, as well as any comments and reblogs, are solely the author's own; they do not necessarily reflect the views of the administrator of this Tumblr blog. For entertainment only.

[canichangemyblogname]

This is what you get when wages don’t keep up and greedflation takes over, making many necessities, like a roof over one’s head, inaccessible.

This is what happens when you have less disposable income than previous generations.

This is also what happens when you systematically attack a nation’s education system, schools, and it’s students. Book bans, content bans, speech bans, and student bans have a negative overall impact on the young. This nation’s tendency to underfund schools has also had a negative impact on outcomes.

This is also what happens when you refuse to take action on violence, especially gun violence. A lack of gun reform has turned our children’s schools into battle grounds where everyday they are expected to potentially have to lay down their life for some old man’s civil war fantasy. It’s baffling that no one seems to want to acknowledge the nation-wide PTSD our youth suffer from. Skyrocketing burn out, anxiety, depression, etc… and no one thinks to connect our mental health struggles to our nation’s culture of violence? We make children as young as 3 routinely practice hiding from mass murderers.

This is also what happens when the young are systemically unrepresented in politics.

This is what happens when you create a culture that mocks mental health challenges and mocks the need for support systems.

This is what happens when you systematically defund and neglect community spaces and programs, with major pushes beginning in the 60s to avoid integrating public spaces. The US is suffering from decades of disinvestment and is now reaping what it sowed during the austerity of the Regan and Bush administrations.

This is what happens when you push your medical system to the brink and force Americans to endanger their health, lives, and well-being for the good of the economy. The US’s public health system is chronically underfunded. Our for-profit health system ensures American spend more than any other nation on healthcare, but get nearly jack-shit in return. We do a piss-poor job of investing in programs that keep people healthy.

This is what happens when a corrupt church and religious institutions have long dominated our social and communal systems. Considering how much of the country’s social infrastructure was built around a church, the young-nones who left the bully pulpit behind find themselves faced with a relatively sparse secular social infrastructure outside of the isolation of social media. They realize that we need to radically re-envision “community” in many regards and that the suburban sprawl hell and its zoning laws our grandparents and parents created is antithetical to this. (And so many have turned to media and consuming for that illusion of community. Add to that the lack of third spaces as most “public” spaces are businesses.)

And this is what happens when the bourgeois of the older generations lie about climate change and politicians sit on their assess and pawn the climate catastrophe onto this nation’s children. “I won’t have to worry about this in my life time.” Most of our coast will be unlivable in the coming decades. Large swaths of the country will be too hot and dry to sustain life. Not to mention the worsening air quality, the roll back of water protections, and the increase in severe droughts and crop failures. It *will* happen in my life time.

So, no, NBC, I don’t think tanking youth happiness in the US is due to the fact people no longer get “crunk at the club.” —Sincerely, someone who’s one of those “Gen Z”

[nerdygaymormon]

I just found this blog and I'm so happy it exists. I was raised in the church and with the area I live in, LGBT+ people are "accepted" readily but at the same time... No one talks about it in relation to Members being Queer. It's like everyone ignores the fact that there is at least 1 queer member in the area because "Oh they aren't part of the church" or something. It's confusing and difficult to be out as anything other than CisHetAllo. I have found that as much as I try, and I feel better knowing about myself, I have found it increasingly difficult to talk about the same things in Online spaces compared to Church spaces. Something always seems to conflict, whether it is members not being particularly supportive of LGBT+ or those online judging Anyone who is a member. (I have had some people I consider[ed] friends make some... Negative... Remarks regarding the church and its members.)

I'm glad to see a space like this existing, where I know that I can be both Queer, and a Member of the church, without being "othered"

Thank you so much. <3

I'm sorry you're having a bit of a rough time of it, but you're right, unless someone is saying to everyone "Hey, I'm here and I'm queer," most Latter-day Saints assume there's absolutely no one at church who is LGBT+.

The LDS Church does have a reputation for being homophobic, so if I say I'm Mormon, other queer people will nod their head and say something about how they know that had to be so hard growing up. Also, the LDS church isn't exactly respected by other Christian denominations, they like to speak of it like it's the punchline of a joke.

A lot of people are becoming aware of the research that shows social media negatively affects young people's mental health and well being. It interferes with their sleeping habits and they spend less time in person with friends and developing their real-world social skills. Social media for youth is associated with problems like depression, cyberbullying, eating disorders. Calls are being made to place limits on the amount of time youth can spend online.

However, research shows there's one group of youth for whom social media has a beneficial impact, and that's LGBTQ youth. TikTok, Tumblr, Discord, YouTube, and so on, are a lifeline. They go from feeling completely alone and no one understanding what they're going through to suddenly discovering there's thousands of people who feel the same way, which is eye-opening and comforting. Not that it's universally good, we still run into hateful speech.

Social media allows LGBT people to explore their identities and find acceptance and emotional support. Some research shows there's a decrease in depression and suicidal thoughts for LGBT youth who are online. It gives them hope and a sense of control. Even when they do encounter harmful things online, they can turn it off, which they can't do with a school bully or family members saying offensive things.

I think for queer Mormons, the experience is even more so like that when you find other LGBT LDS people online. They get you in a way no one else truly does. It is like finding a second home with friends & family. It helps build our resilience. Representation matters. Reading words that are how I feel, that gives us hope and courage.

I'm glad you found my blog. I suggest doing a search for #queerstake, you'll find more posts from other queer Mormons and former Mormons. We even have a discord server we call queerward which is a lively place. I know for me it gives me a sense of belonging. If this was a ward or stake in real life, I would move so that I could be part of it, but it's online so I can access it wherever I am.

[noticiassincensura]

Gen Z Has Been Asked About Social Media: Nearly Half Wish TikTok and Twitter Had Never Existed

While millennials had many social networks to choose from, today’s youth have only a few platforms dominated by internet giants, and they see this as having affected their personal lives.

According to official studies, nearly all American teenagers regularly use social media and spend an average of almost five hours a day on these platforms alone. And although at first, it sounds like we should be grateful for the opportunity to have communication tools accessible to everyone without a monetary cost, let’s consider the analysis from two experts who suggest that young people would prefer if these platforms had never existed.

It’s important to note that feelings of regret or resentment are common with addictive products (such as cigarettes) and addictive activities like gambling, and this is also happening with social media. Jonathan Haidt, a psychologist, and Will Johnson, a survey company leader, point out that “in the case of non-addictive products (like a comb or a bicycle), it’s rare to find people who use the product every day but wish it would be banished from the world.”

A Recent Survey of 1,006 Gen Z Adults (Aged 18 to 27) Revealed That Nearly Half Wish Social Media Had Never Existed

More than 60% of respondents said they spend at least four hours a day on social media, with 23% saying they spend seven or more hours daily. Additionally, 60% of young people believe that social media has a negative impact on society, often citing its effects on their mental health.

One in Three Young People Says Social Media Has Harmed Their Personal Life

Regarding their own lives, 52% consider that social media has benefited their day-to-day experiences, while 29% say it has harmed them personally. An important aspect highlighted by The New York Times is that the percentage of respondents citing specific personal benefits was generally higher than those mentioning harm, but this was less true for women and LGBTQ respondents.

Much of the sadness stems from FOMO (fear of missing out) or comparisons with the lives of others. There are also documented risks affecting regular users, such as sleep deprivation, body image distortion, depression, anxiety, exposure to content promoting suicide or eating disorders, sexual predation, and sextortion, as well as compulsive overuse that interferes with success in other areas of life.

TikTok Has Become a Forum for Sharing Experiences, Turning the Local Concerns of Gen Z into Global Worries

Experts argue that if any other consumer product were causing serious harm to more than one in 10 young users, there would be a wave of laws to ban or regulate it.

From Many Social Networks to Just a Few

Additionally, survey participants were asked which platforms they wish “had never been invented.” Few people believed it would be better if platforms like YouTube, Netflix, the internet in general, or messaging apps did not exist. However, this changes with other networks. Nearly half of Gen Z wishes that social media platforms like X (formerly Twitter) and TikTok did not exist.

[pewinternet]

Society has long fretted about technology’s impact on youth. But unlike radio and television, the hyperconnected nature of social media has led to new anxieties, including worries that these platforms may be negatively impacting teenagers’ mental health.

Despite these concerns, teens themselves paint a more nuanced picture of adolescent life on social media. It is one in which majorities credit these platforms with deepening connections and providing a support network when they need it, while smaller – though notable – shares acknowledge the drama and pressures that can come along with using social media, according to a survey of U.S. teens ages 13 to 17 conducted April 14 to May 4, 2022.

Eight-in-ten teens say that what they see on social media makes them feel more connected to what’s going on in their friends’ lives, while 71% say it makes them feel like they have a place where they can show their creative side. And 67% say these platforms make them feel as if they have people who can support them through tough times. A smaller share – though still a majority – say the same for feeling more accepted.

Read more: Connection, Creativity and Drama: Teen Life on Social Media in 2022

[youthculture2b]

Social Media and The Youth Culture

Caio Shikano

There is no denying the increase in the use of media among teenagers over the past few years. Platforms such as Instagram, TikTok, Snapchat, and Twitter have become very popular among teens, transforming their modes of communication, self-expression, and social interactions, and although it has many benefits, social media can also bring problems to teenagers. This essay explains the factors driving this surge and the impacts it has on teenagers.

One of the most driving factors to this increase is what social media has to offer to teenagers. All of these apps like TikTok, Instagram, etc. are offering something that every teenager needs, a way to find others like themselves, in other words, a way to find those who like the same things and share the same interests. This is the reason why “communities” are so common on social media, whether it’s a car community or a gym community, social media has the power to easily bring people together in groups, and that is why teens use it so much.

Another reason why teens are using social media so much is because of the absurd amount of content that is being constantly posted online. The amount of entertainment that teens can get on social media is enormous and very diverse, going from cooking recipes to memes or ”tik tok dances”, and although some of it can be very informative, it can also be very addictive.

On top of being addictive, social media usage among teens can come with more issues. Cyberbullying is a great example of how social media can be used negatively. Cyberbullying is bullying on social media apps like Instagram or WhatsApp, in which someone can post or send hate messages, offensive comments, etc. to another person, but in these cases, identifying who is offending who is much more difficult than in real life. Cyberbullies use the perk of being anonymous on social media to offend and dissipate hate speech on the internet.

Teens' mental health is also affected when they’re exposed to certain social media contents, an example shown in a study is that when girls who don’t feel good about their bodies are exposed to influencers that look good or better in ways that they're not, they tend to compare themselves making them feel even worse with themselves.

Another issue caused by the usage of social media that has recently come to light is the sleeping problems caused by all the notifications and the lack of sleep due to late-night usage of the internet. That being said, social media causes sleep problems and lower its quality. The usage of cellphones and the usage of social media as TikTok make people more energized, when they shouldn't, then, sleep comes in inconvenient hours. This keeps the brain active without seeming like exercises but tiring it.  Although it has many benefits, the usage of social media comes with problems, and it has to be recognized. Teenagers should, with the control of its usage, have many benefits and use it in a better and more conscious way.

[mariacallous]

If you give a kid a smartphone, they’re going to want a social media account.

That’s not the start of a storybook. The average age for a kid getting their first smartphone is 10.3. Within a year, a child has likely made four or five social media accounts; by the age of 12, 90 percent of kids are already on social media, according to research by Linda Charmaraman, a senior research scientist who runs the Youth Media and Well-Being Research Lab at Wellesley College.

For parents and caregivers, the decision to let your youngster sign up for TikTok, Instagram, or Snapchat can feel like a daunting milestone. In May, the US surgeon general suggested that social media is contributing to a mental health crisis among the nation's youth. Around the world, lawmakers have been mounting pressure on the likes of Meta and TikTok to restrict the addictive design features that young users are subjected to. But social media can be valuable to young people too. Digital spaces can be beneficial settings to build friendships and receive social support from peers. So if your kid starts asking about social media (or you suspect that they already have secret accounts), what’s a parent to do?

“Social media is not inherently good or bad,” says Charmaraman, whose research focuses on adolescent development and social media. “It’s really about how people come to use social media, in what ways, and what kinds of supports they have to navigate it in a way that’s right for them.”

It’s absolutely possible for families to foster a healthy relationship with social media by understanding the science, starting conversations about social media and mental health, and setting boundaries on security settings and screen use. Here’s how to get started, whether your kid is 17 or approaching the age of 10.3.

What Does the Research Really Say?

It’s still too soon to determine any long-term effects of social media on youth mental health, says Charmaraman. She encourages parents to take a critical look at the popular studies that draw correlations between teens’ social media use and negative outcomes like depression and anxiety. “When you actually look at the statistical weight of how much we can explain the rise in rates of mental health difficulties due to social media or technology use, it’s less than 1 percent,” she says.

Correlational studies might also discount larger forces that contribute to mental health difficulties, like socioeconomic status or family relationships. For example, if a child is in a household where parents argue frequently, the child may turn to social media more often to seek support or distraction. That doesn’t mean social media is the problem. More restrictions on social media don’t correlate to a happier child, either, Charmaraman points out.

It’s also important to understand that much of the current research on social media and youth well-being has focused on middle-class white families. There’s still more to be learned about how social media impacts nonwhite, LGBT, or neurodivergent youth, or youth in unstable housing situations.

In other words, there’s no scientifically proven, one-size-fits-all social media rule. Tailor the following guidelines to your family and your kids, and be ready to adapt them as your kids grow older and their situations change. Don’t be afraid to set different guidelines for siblings too—kids in the same family could have different needs.

‘Onboard’ Your Kid Onto Social Media

You might want to start earlier than you think. “Don’t assume that your kid isn’t already on social media,” says Charmaraman. Especially if your child has an older sibling, or friends with older siblings, it’s likely that they’ve engaged with social media in some way.

Charmaraman recommends initiating a conversation about social media when a child is in late elementary or middle school, then gradually “onboarding” them onto social media with a lot of structure, rules, and oversight at first. It’s easier to be proactive about social media guidelines than to try to undo bad habits that have been cemented over years. “Prepare, as opposed to repair,” she says. (If you have an older teen, not all hope is lost—but more on that later.)

To onboard your kid, start with the highest level of scrutiny and security over their social media use, then gradually loosen the reins as the child gets older. Open up the social media app that your child is interested in, and look through the menu of settings together. Have a conversation with your child about how the platform works: What kinds of security settings and parameters make sense at the moment? Who should be allowed to message your child?

If a child is younger, you might consider having access to the account’s password as well. You might also set up an app’s in-house parental controls. (Here’s how to do that on Snapchat and Discord.) That way, if your child encounters violent, sexual, or other inappropriate content, you can intervene more quickly.

As a child gets older and earns more trust, parents can loosen restrictions on safety settings. If the child shows that they’re not yet able to self-regulate the healthy time they’re spending on social media, add more restrictions.

Chararaman recommends the onboarding approach rather than banning social media outright. Kids can find ways around restrictions, and more seriously, they’ll likely hold back if something bad happens to them online.

Recognize the Signs of Problematic Media Use

How can you tell the difference between healthy and unhealthy use of social media? Charmaraman says there’s no magic number for screen time limits. Some kids can use their phones healthily for several hours, if they’re searching for information or interacting with friends. Other kids tend toward more problematic behaviors, so they would benefit from more guardrails around screen time.

Sarah Domoff, an assistant professor at the University at Albany – State University of New York, suggests that as parents observe their kids’ social media use,  they look into three broad categories:

The content your child encounters: You won’t be able to block all potentially inappropriate content on the internet from your child. So it’s important to know how your child responds. Do they continue to engage with content that’s potentially harmful, stressful, or untrue? If they’re having unhealthy responses to what they see on social media, consider more restrictions. If your child is able to recognize and bypass inappropriate content, they can be more independent.

When social media is being used: “The research shows that some times of day may matter more than others,” Domoff says. If screens interfere with sleep or schoolwork, consider having a conversation with your child about changing the timing of social media use, so it doesn’t interfere with other activities that keep them well.

Vulnerabilities that are specific to your child: Some youth may be more vulnerable to certain kinds of content or interactions that exacerbate mental health concerns.

Use these three categories to guide the conversations you have with your kids about social media. It’s important to acknowledge that it’s developmentally appropriate for teens to need some privacy from their parents as they explore their identities. If you decide to follow what your teen is doing online, make sure that your teen is aware of it. Frame your actions transparently, says Domoff. Try to tell them, “Because I’m concerned about your safety, I will be checking your content” or “I understand there are things that you may not want me to see. I’m just concerned about you being safe.”

Start a Conversation at Any Age (and Maybe in the Car)

What if your child is an older teen with social media accounts, known to you or otherwise? It’s never too late to start a conversation, says Aliza Kopans, a rising junior at Brown University and cofounder of Tech(nically) Politics, an organization that collects youth stories about social media and advocates for legislative reform. She says it’s important for adults to validate the importance of social media to teens. Don’t frame it as a waste of time, and acknowledge that online friendships can be just as valuable as those made in real life. “Come from a place of curiosity,” says Kopans. Rather than making assumptions, ask your teen how they’re using social media and how social media is making them feel, and start from there.

Domoff recommends weaving conversations about social media into your daily conversations. Treat it as informally as asking them how school went. “Just as you want to be the person your kids come to when they have a fight with their friend, you want to be that person too when it comes to online interactions,” says Domoff.

Still feeling awkward? Try talking about social media in the car, on the way to school or basketball practice. Parents often have an easier time navigating potentially awkward conversations in the car, says Charmaraman. That way there’s a natural end point, and you don’t have to make weird eye contact.

Be a Good Scroll Model

Your own behavior as a parent or trusted adult can have a powerful impact on your children’s relationship to social media. “If you’re checking work emails on your phone at the dinner table, what example does that send?” says Kopans.

Try to open up about your own experiences and reflections on social media, says Domoff. As a parent, you can model conversations about consent and privacy online. Ask your child, “Is it OK if I post this picture of us?” She suggests sharing your own day-to-day experiences, like accounts you follow or memes that you like.

She also suggests sharing the ways that social media impacts your own mental health, asking your kids something like “Hey, I saw this content, and it made me sad. Do you see things that bring you down? What’s something that you can look up online that lifts you up?” Address the mistakes that you’ve made on social media, and show your teens that they can always recover from their social media missteps too.

Model good internet privacy hygiene for your kids too. Teach them how to create (and keep secret) strong passwords for social media accounts, set up two-factor authentication, and practice basic smartphone security.

Finally, you can let your kids make some mistakes on social media, just like they will inevitably make mistakes in their friendships or at school. “Remember that being online is a skill that young people need to develop,” says Charmaraman. Friction or drama on social media doesn’t necessarily mean you should pull the plug. Eventually, your teen will become a young adult who is going to need to know how to monitor their own internet activity.

Rather than bringing out the banhammer immediately, consider the skills you’re helping your kid build, Charmaraman says, “Think less about ‘How do I get my kid off their phone?’ and more ‘How do I equip my kid with the literacy and self-knowledge to prepare them for a digitally connected future?’”