#need to try to not get stuck in this feeling but my god it's so hard . it's so fucking hard . god i'm so lonely

[siavahdainthemoon]

I am not defending using AI to write essays.

But this entire post is ridiculous.

The vast majority of people writing essays DO NOT WANT TO BE WRITING THEM. They are being forced to spend time - LOTS of time - writing a pointless (to them) essay about something they almost certainly do not give a fuck about.

'What are you trying to be free of?/The living?' No, you pretentious twit, living is what your student WANTS to do. They want to be free of this waste-of-time assignment SO THEY CAN GO DO THINGS THAT ACTUALLY MATTER TO THEM.

The arrogance of saying that essay-writing is LIVING, good GODS. (And I say that as someone who DOES enjoy writing them!)

Students using AI in essays is not (only, probably even mostly) an issue of not wanting to learn. It's a sign of how desperate they are to have their time back. It's a sign of how fucking pointless the vast majority of school feels - IS - when you're a teenager.

Do none of you remember school??? School SUCKED. Being at the whims of adults who genuinely did not care about your interests, who didn't EVER value your time, SUCKED. Being forced to spend hours every day on essays about crap that ceased to matter the second you completed your final exam SUCKED.

Of course tons of students are going to grab at something that lets them use those hours for something else!

'At the end of the day I never cared if my students could remember a historical fact or figure' Okay but THEY STILL HAD TO DO THAT THOUGH. Doesn't matter how you feel about it, our education systems demand that they memorise these pointless dates and useless facts and write essays about them. And it's frustrating and exhausting and HARD and POINTLESS to do that!

(And that's without touching on the immense pressure they're under to get every essay perfect because GPA, because if they make one mistake it could ruin their lives forever. That's without touching on the bullshit classism that is the academic language we demand they write their essays in and how that's really just a scam to keep knowledge away from the 'uneducated'. And a gazillion other issues tied up in all of this.)

You want students to stop generating their homework with AI, give them homework they can see the point of, or about topics they care about.

The problem isn't the students. The problem isn't their mindsets. It's the fucking TRAVESTY of FORCED LABOUR we put them through, UNPAID, from the time they can talk to the time they graduate.

We would fucking RIOT if people put us through that shit as adults. If we were all conscripted to do as much unpaid labour, POINTLESS unpaid labour at that, as we spent our ENTIRE CHILDHOODS DOING, we would riot. And you're judging and huffing and wringing your hands because the kids stuck in that situation are INEXPLICABLY using tools (however despicable the tool itself) that make that situation more bearable?

Dramatically restructure how we teach and this problem will go away. Until then, students will ALWAYS try to find shortcuts and I will not blame them for that.

And y'all need to wake the fuck up and THINK about what these kids are going through instead of just moralising about it.

[fuctacles]

<< nine | 😺 | eleven >>

Posting early so you have something to think about on Thanksgiving. I'll be taking a break from posting my wips in December to focus on all the events. Speaking of, check out @genderthings @stmonstercalendar and @stevieweek

"They're so—" Eddie's sentence is broken with a yelp when Stephanie slaps his hands. 

"Fluffy?" Steph offers, going back to closing up her salon. "Soft? Healthy? They won't be if you keep touching them."

He huffs, slotting his hands under his armpits so he wouldn't be tempted to reach up. 

"If you want, I can get you some of that conditioner to take home. You could charm all the city girls with your nice hair." She turns to him with a smile, looking over her work once again. She pulls a strand of his hair back in place and Eddie imagines his band making it big, touring with a private hairdresser fussing over him before every concert. They'd take all the cats on the tour bus too.

"The city girls like my unkempt poor artist looks, thank you very much," he jokes. "The boys may appreciate it, though."

"For the boys, then." She smiles. "Did you walk here?"

He shakes his head. 

"Nah, I'm too lazy for that. You?"

"I try to walk to work as long as the weather lets me," she says. "Need to keep the old bones in shape." She pats her plush thighs distractingly, but it's not enough for Eddie to miss her words. 

He rolls his eyes. 

"Your bones aren't old. I was gonna offer you a ride, but maybe you deserve to walk since you're so young and energetic," he sends her a wry look. 

"Ah, but I always wanted a ride in a big old kidnapper van!" She bats her eyelashes at him, her playful pout in full swing. Eddie is so, so weak. 

"Don't call it a kidnapper van." He scrunches his nose. "It's a stoner slash garage band van," he corrects her.

"Ah, mea culpa. Lead me to your stoner van, then?"

"You call yourself old and yet you act so insufferable," he shakes his head with a smile and offers her his elbow. 

"Gotta keep something about me young," she jokes back and then yelps when Eddie pinches her in the side as she grabs his arm. 

"I think there's plenty young about you," he says, giving her a pointed up and down. 

"Yeah, bet you say it to all the old ladies," she snarks back. "When you help them cross the street or carry their—ah!"

"Oh my gods, Stephanie!" Eddie cuts her off, pressing her against the side of his van. "If you think you're old then call me a geriatrophiliac, because you're so hot I can't think about anyone else."

Steph's eyes are wide and her cheeks are flushed and he wants to kiss her so badly. He backs away, though, because he's a gentleman (sometimes) and wants to give her some space. Besides, he probably just crossed some lines he shouldn't have. 

She breathes out once he steps back, and chuckles. 

"You're just saying that," she deflects, making something in Eddie boil. "You're out there in college and I'm stuck here with my small hair salon."

"Oh, you mean you're a successful hot businesswoman with her own salon and plans to branch it out?" He raises an eyebrow, putting his hands on his hips.

"Plans," she points out. 

"Very plausible plans," he adds. 

Stephanie shrugs. 

"Just, get in the car before I lose my patience." He shakes his head. But then seeing her hesitance he deflates, losing his bravado instantly. "Unless you're not comfortable with that? I promise I'll drive you straight home."

"Why would I be uncomfortable?" she asks, her voice a little small like she knows exactly why but doesn't want to put it out there. Albeit reluctantly, Eddie will do it for her. 

"Because I said I'm into you and now I'm inviting you inside my shady not-kidnapper van," he reminds her. 

"Yeah, but you're just saying that to make me feel better." Steph shakes her head softly, smiling her small, self-deprecating smile. "Which I do appreciate, but..." she trails off with a shrug.

Eddie is fed up with her. As beautiful as she is, her head is a maze she's clearly getting lost in and someone needs to pull her out of it. 

"Can I kiss you?" he butts in, realizing she's losing steam.

"What?" Her eyebrows jump in surprise. 

"Oh, you heard me." He takes a step closer, crowding her in. Maybe space is the opposite of what she needs. "Can I kiss you?" he repeats. "On the mouth. Tongue and all, if you don't mind."

He watches in real time as her cheeks turn red and her gaze drops down to his lips. 

"Here?" she breathes out. 

"Yes, here. So everyone knows how lucky I am." 

She looks up into his eyes, searching for any deceit but she won't find any. Her lips press together and come back shinier, wetter, and Eddie's own tingle in anticipation.

"Are you sure?"

Eddie's done with her. And done for her. He knows she won't admit what she wants, won't ask for it even when laid down on a silver platter in front of her. So he changes his question. 

"Just say 'no'." He leans just a tiny bit closer. 

She doesn't. Her eyes zero on his lips and her chest expands with her deep breaths. Eddie leans in more, and she twitches like she wants to reach back but won't. 

He closes the distance. 

Stephanie smells of hairspray and coffee. She's soft and perfect and he's afraid she'll flee if he touches her, but to ground them both, he reaches with his arms to cup her elbows, a safe place to hold her and not spook her. He moves his lips gently, slowly, but then he feels a tug on his jacket, which she grabs to hold on to him, and presses just a little bit closer. 

Eddie feels the exhale from her nose on his cheek as she relaxes against the van, giving him the illusion of towering over her, despite them being almost the same height. He slowly drags his hands up to caress her neck, angling her jaw gently how he wants it. When he finally sucks on her pouty bottom lip as he's been dreaming of, she exhales into him, tentative yet asking. She jolts at the touch of his tongue but parts her lips further anyway.

She feels like heaven and Eddie is almost ashamed by the sound he makes after tasting her properly, but her hand slides to his waist and he doesn't care about making a fool of himself in front of her and anyone else for that matter. 

If she wanted to, he'd deck himself in full jester attire just to make her smile, to take the load of worry off her chest. Oh, how he wants to take things off her chest. It's been a while since a simple kiss made him feel so giddy, so exhilarated, and he hopes she feels it too. 

He's excited for what's to come, not just in bed, though he hopes, yearns for that too, but making her happy and whole, seeing herself how he sees her. 

The sharp sound of a whistle pulls them apart. 

"Get a room, kids!" someone laughs jovially as a car slowly passes by, but by the time their heads snap towards it, it's gone behind the corner. 

"Well," Eddie chuckles softly. "Still feeling old?" he asks Steph with a smile that quickly falters when he can't read her expression. A million things he could have done wrong fleet through his head and he takes half a step back, but her hand is still holding on to his jacket. 

She's still relaxed against the van, so he forces his brain to quiet and waits. Her head tips back, exposing her neck and the faintest hint of an Adam's apple, invisible otherwise. He's ridiculously happy to be able to see it and hopes he'll be able to suck on it too. 

"I feel..." she finally says, and Eddie latches to every sound leaving her lips. "Something, for sure."

Nothing else comes so he trails his palm down her arm to gently squeeze at her wrist. 

"Good something?" he asks hopefully.

Their eyes meet again, giving him some relief, though the prolonged silence is fighting against it. He still waits and gives her time to think. She doesn't shake off his hand so he rubs his thumb against her pulse point.

Until it twists in his grasp, and he's ready to let go but she grabs at his fingers to squeeze back.

"I think so," she finally decides, giving him a small, tentative smile. 

my ko-fi bc i'm in deeper shit than i thought

the boys: @wheneverfeasible @steddieinthesun @hattsy-likes-pretty-stuff @bumblebeecuttlefishes @phantomcat94

@tartarusknight  @tinyplanet95 @steddiefication @estrellami-1 @disrespectedgoatman

@madigoround @tartarusknight @blasvemous @cryptid-system @lawrencebshoggoth

@hellowhatthehellisgoingonhere @dreamercec @manliest-of-muppets

[sisyphean-tragedian]

A Walk in the Forest

[got bored over thanksgiving. so instead of hanging out with my family i wrote fanfiction. Living la Vida Loca] [thanks to my Best Friend @jangles28 for being there while i wrote. Mwah.] [tw: smoking, non-consensual kiss, mentioned dead family member]

--

The detective had gone back to his mother-in-law’s house for the holidays. Only for about a week, just to make sure Junior wasn’t completely bereft of any company save the detective’s (and visits from Waldo? Maybe? God, they’d have to up the security again). 

It was hard, though. Even after years had passed, there were still the looks of sorrow and pity, and there was an extra chair left dusty in the closet. Junior seemed to be meshing well with the relations. It would be good for them to hear stories about their mother, stories still too painful for the detective to tell.

Having settled Junior down in front of their grandmother for a few of said stories, the detective flashed her a pained smile and announced that they’d be slipping out for a quick walk.

“Alright, hon, just be careful, would you? And don’t forget to bundle up, it’s getting cold.”

The detective’s mother-in-law chimed in with her ever-helpful advice, and Junior looked up at them with a smile and a wave. The detective smiled back, less pained this time, and told Junior to be good while they were gone.

They walked toward the coat closet, and pulled out their trench coat and other appropriate cold-weather gear. Properly “bundled up”, as their mother-in-law had put it, they exited the house with one final wave. 

Their mother-in-law’s residence was smack in the middle of a forest, so it was perfect to wander around and think in. Not that they had much to think about, at the moment. It was more an excuse to get away from the crush of pitying family members and reminiscences about their unfortunately late wife. The sentiment was nice and all, but it just made the detective feel worse after a while.

They started down a relatively little-traveled path in the woods. It really was beautiful, with oak and aspen and pine all around, and snow beginning to fall in large white flakes. They knew that the precipitation would drive then back inside sooner rather than later, but all they needed was a few minutes to clear their head.

Reaching into the pocket of their trench coat, they pulled out their packet of cigarettes and their lighter. After a bit of fumbling, they managed to get a cigarette lit and in their mouth. They took a drag, and exhaled a long draught of smoke. It warmed them nicely.

After a few minutes of simply smoking and wandering through the woods, the detective declared themselves sufficiently not-morose enough to go back and engage more with their relations. They turned around and began to head back to the house.

Only… 

They couldn’t find the path.

They tried to retrace their steps, follow the sun, a trail of ashes, notable strange-looking trees, anything that might help them find their way back to the house, but they had no luck.

Keeping a cool head, they continued to scour the landscape for any hints of the path back to their mother-in-law’s abode. Nada.

Then, off in the distance, against the autumnal backdrop of oranges, browns, and swirls of white, they spotted him.

He was leaning against a tree, smiling his insufferable smile, in his stupid striped sweater.

Still a little off-balance due to the constant reminders of their dead wife, the detective charged. Against their better judgement, of course, seeing as they had no weapons except their cigarette lighter, and no real means of subduing Waldo in case they did manage to get him down.

Just as they had reached tackling distance, Waldo stuck out his cane, and the detective ran bodily into it. Winded, they fell back against a nearby tree, and clutched at their chest while trying to regain their breath.

Waldo looked down at them, still with that ever-present smile.

“You look a little lost, dear detective. I saw you walking earlier, and I simply couldn’t resist taking the chance to say hello to an old friend.”

The detective, still slightly winded, snarled at Waldo. Much to their chagrin, this only made Waldo’s smile widen.

“I can help you back to your beloved family, detective, but it’ll come at a price to you. What do you say to a walk with me?”

Having recovered from both their earlier fit of rage and running into Waldo’s cane full-force, the detective took a look at him, weighed their options, then promptly turned around and walked away. From previous experience, they knew that they could unfortunately not out-grapple Waldo (who knew something that looked like mere skin and bones could be that strong?), and they didn’t think they could put up with the needling that he was sure to put them through.

So, they walked away. Picking their battles and all. They continued through the forest, searching for the path. They could hear Waldo behind them, in the crunching leaves and the soft giggles that came every now and again.

Eventually, they stopped walking. The sun had begun to set, casting long shadows across the forest floor. They had yet to find the path, and the relentless giggling was getting on their nerves. Suddenly, they felt someone much closer behind them than previously anticipated.

“Are you sure you don’t want my assistance, detective? It won’t cost you much, I promise. And I’m sure your baby is worried for you…”

Jumping away from Waldo, the detective turned to face him once again. At the reminder of their child, they caved a little. They had been searching for at least forty five minutes, and they had yet to find the trail that should have taken them ten minutes at the most. Briefly, they debated the merits of getting into a scuffle with Waldo. Based on empirical evidence, that would leave them bruised, frustrated, and Waldo-less, and they really did need to get back to Junior.

“Fine. No funny business, though. I don’t want to deal with any of your tricks,” acquiesced the detective with a sigh.

“Me? Tricks? I wouldn’t dream of such a thing, detective. Tricks are beneath me. Now, come along!” While speaking, Waldo looped an arm over the detective’s shoulder, much to their chagrin, and started walking in what seemed like no particular direction.

Waldo whistled as he walked, the detective noted. It was all too cheery a tune for a murderer, but they weren’t about to tell him to switch it up. They had to practically take two steps to every one of Waldo’s and they suspected that he might’ve been enjoying that, if the new lilt to his smile was any indication.

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, they came within sight of the house. The walk was stunningly hijinks-free, but the detective knew that out of sight didn’t mean out of mind for Waldo. They tried to duck out of his grip, but all of a sudden, his hand turned to steel on their shoulder.

“Not so fast, dear detective. I said there’d be a price, and I’m a man of my word,” Waldo said.

As the detective inhaled to ask what Waldo wanted from them, they were abruptly lifted, and pressed against a nearby tree. Indignantly, they tried to flail out of Waldo’s grasp, but he kept them firmly in the air.

When they tried to start protesting this treatment; however, there came something that they didn’t expect. 

Waldo leaned in, and pressed a kiss to their lips. The detective, jarred, jerked back, but unfortunately hit their head against the tree. Waldo chuckled, then dropped them unceremoniously to the ground. 

“Do remember your spacial awareness, detective. Anyhow, I’m sure your child misses you sorely. It has been fun, mouse, we should do this more often. Happy holidays!” 

And with that, he was gone. The detective, indignant, picked themself up off the ground, and brushed all the leaf debris off. Maybe they had time for one more smoke before they went in, just to steady their nerves? 

They reached in their pocket, and found a signature red envelope in place of their cigarettes. When had Waldo even found the time to do that? Inside, they found a rather condescending note regarding their smoking habit. With a frustrated growl, they stormed the rest of the way back to their mother-in-law’s house, and hugged a teary-eyed Junior upon their arrival.

The detective reassured everyone that they were alright, they had just lost track of time in the woods, no need to worry, but their words rang hollow even to themself. That night, once again, they sat beside an empty spot at the dinner table, and stared out towards the patch of woods where they had last seen Waldo. The snow that had since fallen covered any trace that might have remained from the afternoon’s happenings.

[silverskye13]

Dude dude dude I’ve been reading all the snippets that aren’t on AO3 and because of how they were sent to me I couldn’t reply then (also like- I figured it would be maybe a little annoying to get 12 messages about them when I could send one longer one)

All of them are just so incredibly wonderfully written god I could go on for hours about the deconstruction of every single sentence, but one stood out as a favourite:

“The best seat” for exactly one reason: THE END POEM LINES!!!! Stunning!!!!!! Incredibly spaced and the repetition and the way it repeats the ‘universe loves me more’ theme and OUGH feeling shrimp emotions about these guys, Wels might be a little BITCH but he’s a damn poetic one

Also the delivery ficlet on AO3 (Red and Renbob) MAN those two are so goofy I love them- comedic timing can be hard to get right in writing but the whole paragraph of Renbob speaking with emoticons and the reader (or at least me-) thinking “how is he doing that??” And then immediately Red wonders the same thing? I was cracking up

Also this changes depending on who’s appeared most recently, but my current favourite character is The Hand- he’s just so *close* to Martyn (normal) that you start to forget he’s not until something happens and you go oh. *oh*. And the differences hit you like a knee to the stomach

The whole fic the whole world you’ve made- just absolutely stunning, incredible, for certain it has permanently changed my brain chemistry and I cannot wait to see how it continues and finishes <3333

So like, just so you're aware, when I first received this ask I was stuck on the highway after my tire exploded [literally, it was in ragged tatters when I got to the shoulder]. It was snowing and freezing and the jack slipped off while I was changing the tire [unharmed] and it took the roadside assistance guy 2 hours to get to me after promising "just five more minutes I swear" and "I just passed you I'm coming back around, two minutes," three, four, five goddamn times.

And you know what? This made me smile. It was a smile I desperately needed, sitting on the busy road watching it snow and waiting for literally anyone to help. So thank you for your kindness, and for writing kind words, and for being excited. You have no idea how positive of an impact that had on a truly grueling day.

I'm glad!! You liked the end poem Wels perspective fic. I was writing it to "Put it on Me" by Matt Maeson [recommended to me by countthelions] and I was trying very hard to emulate the feeling of circling and inevitability the song has. There's a very waltz-like meter in the song and it's very very fun to work with.

And! I'm glad the comedy from the Red/Renbob one landed! I mostly use comedy to break tension in fics, so doing a completely upbeat/comedic centered fic had me a little nervous I couldn't land the tone. I am so so stoked you enjoyed it :3

[sunllghtt]

Hi are you up for a messy scene analysis thing

Ofc it's this scene who do you think I am

I've been wanting to do this for God knows how long but I never had the balls and neither the words to (still don't) but I wanna try to properly talk about this scene. My primal instinct is to sit here and tell you how much this 30 second scene changed the trajectory of these characters in the next movies, how it made their friendship grow and develop and how much of a storytelling lesson it is (oh the so so deep understanding you need to have of your characters to have them say things so vaguely and still express exactly what they mean). I could also go down the emotional and subjective road and ramble about how much it means to me and how I resonate with it, but I've done that at least 837382 times and I think everyone knows it by now 😭 so!!! Let's get to the real thing

(I'm trying to keep it as analytical and straightforward as possible but please note that this is my favorite scene that's ever existed so neutrality is not really a possibility)

Rocket is a brat. He's restless, he's loud, he's always puffing up his chest and yelling at someone and picking fights with the wind cuz it was blowing in a way he didn't like and he's just an overall bastard. In this scene, though, we see him inside out. His head is low, his shoulders are slumped, he has his tail between his knees and he looks tired. He speaks quietly (curiously like he doesn't want anybody else to hear him), he's not deliberately insulting anyone and he's just..... defeated??

Up until that point I don't think we ever got to see Rocket like that. From what the movies have shown us he'd never had to. But in the past few days that led to this, Rocket had stolen batteries for no apparent reason (which we'll later learn why💀), ruined their ship, got literally kidnapped by Ravagers, blew up a creepy planet-guy-thing and oh my god attended his friend's dad's funeral. At least half of these things were directly or indirectly his fault and he knows it.

I don't think he ever doubted it was (we see it earlier in the movie when the Guardians leave to "The Chain" by Fleetwood Mac and Rocket scowls and winces like he either stepped in a pile of shit or got hit in the face by regret), but he still argued with Peter even knowing he was in the wrong just to keep up apparences or hold on to a little thread of pride when he was already feeling ashamed for being caught red-handed stealing shit he didn't need AND destroying their ship etc etc, and he just kinda fucked up big time. And I think that's (besides the general exhaustion of parenting a tree and fighting a planet and Yondu's death) is what got him so devastated in that scene.

Ofc Yondu played an extremely important role in that. He was the one to open Rocket's eyes, to give him some sort of reality check and show him the only thing isolation is ever gonna bring him is regret and bitterness (or, in other words, Yondu). Rocket is most of all hopeless and tired and just sad like that because he knows he hurt his friends. He knows he's chasing them away, that he yells at them, that he's always mean and that he steals batteries he doesn't need. He knows he's not awesome to put up with and seeing what happened to Yondu and his former friends probably made him terrified it'd happen to him and the Guardians too. He's stuck in this cycle of pushing them away with everything he can (and we could get into all his trauma regarding betrayal and death and literally endless other things but it's all very clear at this point) and he knows patience doesn't last forever. He's just scared, he feels bad and he's tired.

Now on the other hand we have Quill. He's also destroyed, he lost two fathers (3 if you count what Ego could've been, what he wanted him to be), basically relived his mother's death and had to watch literally every single one of them die. He's also scared and tired, yes, but all he has left is this unstable family of weird idiots who are learning how to show care and he's... pretty much fine with it. He wants it.

And when what Rocket's saying clicks, when he realizes who he's talking about, Quill, who's usually all smirks and teasing and bickering and name-calling, looks at his best friend like this,

because

(From vol 2 script!! Won't even try to comment on that last part before Quill's last line but I also really like that Peter just "shakes his head" over and over like he's just barely listening until he realizes what Rocket really means cuz it also shows a lot about his character. He's naturally a little slow and downright stupid when it comes to this kind of hidden emotional thing and he's also exhausted and depressed from everything that happened and STILL he stops and just. Sees Rocket, and sees Yondu.)

He's not doing well. He's probably sore and hurt and sad and miserable and yet he takes his sweet time to look down at Rocket, let go of his resentment from before and see right through him. In order to understand this scene it's important to remember he most likely doesn't know what Yondu told Rocket at all, he doesn't know anything they said to each other and how Yondu showed him they're mirrors. He doesn't know any of that. He just knows his best friend and his father and how much they resemble each other. He puts up with Rocket's bullshit because he knows how to deal with Yondu.

He could've just ignored him or pretended he didn't know what he was talking about. He could've made Rocket swallow his pride and "teach him a lesson" by making him say what he means without hiding behind metaphors and vague self-deprecation, because Rocket was probably vulnerable and defeated enough to be honest in that moment. And yet, he just looks at his friend, who's usually a loud and mean and restless brat, and is now staring at the floor with his ears droopy and his tail between his knees, and just says, as a form of reassurance and tenderness that's just as subtle and shy as Rocket's insecurities, "Well, of course not."

(The kind and soft and sweet DETERMINATION on his face tho like no!!! No we're not ditching you even though you suck I'm!!! Serious!!!!)

[cloudsbrainpopped]

💚🤍 for captain laserhawk?

Hiii! So. I reread the questions and I think this entire post is about Sarah god bless. I will try to make some points about some other folks but I can’t lie. I do think about her a lot.

💚 - What do people get wrong about your favourite character?

Sarah is not just evil and hot whilst committing crimes against humanity. She is inherently a victim of Eden herself. She was indoctrinated via the propaganda Eden put together through Rayman, who need I remind people, his entire thing was a government ploy aimed at impressionable children (granted, Rayman does actually care for the wellbeing of children but his intent and his actions are not the same thing.) And then there’s the entire military complex and what Eden is capable of, brainwashing for one, memory altering for another. I desperately need a proper breakdown into all of the practices within the government because it cannot just be that. Point is. She looks like she’s been through a bunch of experimentation (ESPECIALLY post Sam’s death. Maybe there’s reason we see much more put into her than anyone else with Eden tech on them. To ensure submission and loyalty. I have my theories but I don’t really have the evidence to back them up as much as possible.) I don’t think she’s just an evil, manipulative and for what it’s worth entirely selfish. I just think what most of who she is or could’ve been has been wholely wiped out of her system. To be fair, she is mostly a system now. And continues a cycle set by systems before her. I feel like she is a weapon slowly losing tap of any and all emotions. And I’m not sure what she’d do if she recognised that. Or if she’d die before that. (This is why I need season 2 soon as. I need it for multiple reasons but if a running theme is character’s recognising their mistakes… uh oh.)

Anyway. My personal speculation aside. She is evil, yes. But not as much as the fandom likes to bring her down to. She does what has to be done to reach her own goals, firmly set in doing that. Who cares about who she takes with her, they’re enemies of state anyway. I feel like Captain Laserhawk as a whole is very clear on who’s unforgivable, whose crimes are reprehensible for the sake of being reprehensible. I don’t get that in Sarah. I see someone desperate for their goals, I see someone stuck in their ways, remorse dead with their family and just… suffering. It’s the methods that bring being evil into it. Although I will not refute the fact that she is fine as fuck. She’s got an undercut, she’s buff, stubborn and has severe father issues. And to be honest I have a thing for most of that when it comes to actual women too so. LMAO… girl I don’t care if you’ve got problems with your father we can share mine.

🤍 - Which character is not as morally bad as people think?

In short. Sarah again but for the reasons listed above. She is not a bitch for the sake of being a bitch. Yeah, she’s a villain and has done absolutely abhorrent shit. But there’s a difference in the fact that she does everything explicitly for her goals. Sometimes I feel like someone would say she kicks stray animals or something because ‘evil’. (She Would Not. She absolutely would not but sometimes it’s just so… flanderised.)

In addition to that. I know this happens in fandom frequently, and fanon will happen but it. Really boils my blood and I’m sure that everyone sitting here has something they’ve seen or the general way a fandom treats a character they like that just. Irritates them but yeah. Also I feel like Dolph deserves an honorary mention for this one. His morals aren’t skewed, they’re for his own goals too but his mental health is naturally in the shitter. I have no idea if that made any sense but I hope what I’ve said has come across alright!

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Bestie Deficiency

[First] Prev <–-> Next

[the-trans-dragon]

Day 2 of Starting Adderall Again:

->I decided to shower, and then went to the bathroom to shower.

-->I remembered my shower was dirty because maintenance recently worked on my toilet and somehow they got chunks of caulk in the shower, and also I hadn't cleaned it since I moved in about 7 months ago

--->Remembered I also wanted to mop since they'd come into my Clean Space with their Outdoor Shoes

---->Went and got the mop but the mop pad was dirty

---->Threw away the dirty mop pad and got a clean one on

--->Went and mopped the bathroom, which room about 60 seconds

-->Turned my focus towards the shower again and started looking for the cleaner

--->Spent probably 5 minutes looking under all the sinks before *remembering* that I'd used it about a week ago and maybe had left it on the counter

---Found it the counter

-->Sprayed the shower with cleaner

--->Decided to wash the sink while the cleaner was working on the shower

--->Finished the sink in about 5 minutes and then washed the shower for 3-5 minutes

-->Turned on the shower to let it rinse all the cleaner off

->Showered in about 10 minutes, much faster than normal because I didn't spend *any* time trying to remember what I was doing, and yet still did all the steps??? Effortlessly????

I managed to mop the bathroom, clean my sink, clean my shower, ***and*** take a shower, in like??????? 30 minutes?????

And it was all virtually effortless. I had to briefly talk myself into doing it, and then ponder "am I getting needlessly distracted? *Should* I mop too, or just clean the shower?" but it didn't really stress me out to wonder about it. I just...had thoughts in my brain...and they didn't really do anything useful...so I just decided to go ahead and mop, since my brain hadnt come up with any good reason *not* to.

I am in a state of peaceful awe and contentment.

[ganondoodle]

(forces myself to stop playing stardew so i can get some progress done on my art projects- daydreams the entire first arc of my original story stuff -again- for 2 hours)

[innalheid]

Feeling very Ascension by Gorillaz ft Vince Staples at 2:18

[imabiscuitinthousandworlds]

I LOVE going everywhere by bike. Don't need to wait for a bus. Don't need to cram myself into a bus with (urgh) people. Or even worse, what feels like every single student in town. I still get home in about the same amount of time. I'm so so flexible including with places. Like yeah sure, let's go there! I don't care if the next bus station is far away. Doesn't matter to me.

Stayed out late with friends recently. Two of em had to get their family to come pick them up because that's too far to walk and it was too late for buses. A different friend lives like 30 minutes away but always walks and their way goes through a small park where literally no one is at with few lanterns so it's pitch black and I could literally just walk them home and then take the bike which is faster and has its own light and feels and probably is safer than walking those dark ass streets at night alone.

Like. I can just do all that. And yeah, sometimes when I'm not doing too well I feel like collapsing afterwards and yeah, maybe my fingers feel like falling off a lot at this time of year but that's like. SO worth it. I have no idea how people can live and NOT go everywhere by bike. Like if it's more than 20-30 minutes maybe but even with hills.... I fucking love my bike.

[orcelito]

Did driving practice today. Actually did parallel parking practice this time, even tho I really didn't want to still. Finally got it into my head that I can maybe do this.

SO......

I have scheduled my driving test. For November 13th, 3 weeks from today.

[lavampira]

:c

[vanweezer]

very very personal, just insight into where im at w my family and things that bother me/have encouraged me to move out

"i know youre moving out so im just gonna say no ones kicking you out and if you feel like this is something you have to do then ok"

thanks! i know im not being kicked out! but yknow i kinda yet a weird vibe when your out of touch husband takes me to a cemetery to yell at me, tell me im just like my father/dont give my father "the time of day", and that im "mean to people who care about me" in front of his dead mother's grave in a poor attempt at guilting me out of speaking my mind. but no yeah thanks for stating the fucking obvious that im leaving on my own terms

[uitzinnigmp3]

.

[b-blushes]

you know when you're in da overwhelm zone due to Circumstances that you don't really have power over. well it's really hard to deescalate from that i am finding!

HOWEVER i am attempting:

FACING THE THINGS because the longer they loom. the longer they are looming for.

regular breaks from Addressing Everything

regular snacks/meals/drinks

prioritising

postponing stuff that can be left until later (But watch out!)

doing other things in advance that are easy to do now (such as stockpiling meals ready for feeling more ill)

asking for help where i can