#need to try to not get stuck in this feeling but my god it's so hard . it's so fucking hard . god i'm so lonely

[yutarot]

ride or die. l.jn smau

017 — when it comes to you.

JENO POV

in all honesty, jeno has no idea what he was going to say when he finally met face to face with jaemin. this past week he has been going over and over it in his head, each and every detail, but nothing at all makes sense. why would jaemin, his longest and closest friend, openly admit to doing something like that. jeno didn’t know whether to be angry or confused, or maybe even a little bit of both. but all he knew was that he needed to speak to him. not just for his own piece of mind, but jaemins too. there was something he needs to know too, and it’s been killing jeno that he can’t speak to his closest friend.

especially when it comes to this. especially when it comes to you.

as he sits in the apartment lobby, staring mindlessly down at his shoes, jeno can do nothing but anticipate the feeling of his gut twisting when he sees jaemin come out of the elevator. and god how it flips in his chest when he finally sees him standing there, an apologetic smile on his face.

but jeno doesn’t know why jaemin could possibly be sorry.

“hi.” jaemin says.

jeno stands. “hi.”

he can’t think of what to say, what to do. so he just lets jaemin lead the conversation.

“how are you?” jaemin asks, knowing the answer.

“been better.”

jaemin sighs, guilt ruining him.

he gets straight to it, almost pleading with him. “i wanted to tell you.” he pauses, “i wanted to tell you everything. but if i missed my opportunity…”

“opportunity?” jeno’s eyes squint in confusion. “what opportunity?”

“to tell her i like her.”

jeno freezes, every inch of his body tensing. he didn’t know what to expect from jaemin, but it definitely wasn’t this. but and as the next words leave his mouth, it all makes sense.

every piece of the puzzle that jeno has been trying to decipher finally falls into place.

“it wasn’t me who leaked your identity, jeno.”

of course it wasn’t.

the air between them thickens, becomes a fog that neither of them can see through.

jaemin continues. “i just-“

jeno can’t help it, he speaks his mind, finishing what jaemin wants to say. he knows him too well. “you just wanted her, and you thought a big act like that would make her fall for you?” jeno says, placing the final piece in its correct place. amongst all of this, all the lying, all the betrayal, it had been all because of a simple sentance.

‘you really like me that much that you wanted to ruin jeno’s career?’

that’s what you had said to chenle in that tweet where you had confronted him when you thought he was the real culprit, that’s what jaemin had foolishly misread. he thought you said it out of surprise, out of adoration. not out of disgust. he hadn’t even made it to the end of the tweet before he had made up his mind, before he decided he was going to falsely admit it was him.

“yeah… it didn’t take me long before i realised i had misread it..” jaemin laughs nervously, closer to wanting to cry than he’s ever seemed. jeno doesn’t blame him, he’s been watching him closely, every comment made from the group hurting him just as much as it had hurt jaemin.

“you’re an idiot.” jeno says. he wants to punch him, make him pay for all the worrying he had made him do, all the hours lying on his friend jungwoo’s sofa, scared about going back to his dorm, scared about going to his dads. but jaemin wasn’t the one who exposed him.

although jeno knew that all along.

“i know i am.” jaemin laughs, “but can you blame me.”

weirdly, jeno can’t. it’s you. he’s seen the way you laugh, he’s seen the way you stuck up for him despite being unsure of why. and something deep in his chest aches at the way jaemin talks about you like he shouldn’t understand. but jeno does, he understands it the most. and he hates himself for it.

because that’s what he did all this for.

he did it for you.

“jaemin.”

jaemins laugher pauses when he notices the tone of jeno’s words. he’s being serious.

“yeah?” he asks.

“there’s something i need to tell you.”

jaemins head tilts. “what is it?”

jeno takes a deep breath, deciding that if he doesn’t tell jaemin now, he fears he never will. and despite jaemins feelings, he doesn’t have a choice. he looks at him, really looks at him, searching for an ounce of uncertainty and finding way too much of it. but he has to do this, it all had to have been worth it. all of it.

so he says it.

“i know who leaked my secret.”

previous : mlist : next

notes; 😆

taglist — open! @jenohyun @jirsungs @do-you-remember-summer-127 @ddolbyong @stqrgr7 @thatsatricky1 @sunghoonsgfreal @nattan127 @ssweetreveries @flamingi @chenlesfavorite @peterm4rker @snoopyjimin @akunoeyebrows @junviadinho @slayhaechan @f6llsun @multifandomania @cookiehaos @catecita @mrsjohnnysuh @luv4jeno @hyuckies18 @dreamiestay @tangerinelovelees @jjaegyeom @https-yeonjun @nanaxwi @yukisroom97 @nosungluv @mrkleelvr @neocrashed @jaedgemental @apolloxxivmin @kyubing @catdonut657 @dudekiss3r @juyeonshour @hamjwis @antifrggile @mmjhh1998 @thegracerammy @jenocity23 @honeynanamin @bluedbliss @lampcults @yyangj3lly

[bombuni]

contains: jongho watching you use a dildo lol

minors dni

“Jjoo-ngie…”

Your pathetic, desperate whines are music to Jongho’s ears. It fuels his ego to see you so broken and needy, tear-filled eyes begging for him from where you drag the plastic toy over your slit. It’s disgustingly adorable, he thinks, how cute you look with a cock between your legs.

He’d found you exactly like this when he got home from work, wrecked and sweaty from hours of trying to replicate his touch on yourself. You’d cried and begged for him to finally relieve you and he almost gave in right then and there, but Jongho’s a man with a will made of steel. He’d only taken the purple, flimsy thing from your hands and pushed it gently back into your leaking hole. His mouth had watered at the sight of your mouth dropping open, as if just his presence had now changed everything for you. Your cute pleading eyes set his goal in mind: to enjoy the sight of your desperation. See how far he can get you before his urges take over.

“Just keep fucking yourself, sweetheart. Or is that too much for your tiny brain to understand? Do you need Jjong to do it for you?”

He swallows a moan when you unabashedly shout for him to take over, how sure you are that Jongho will take care of everything for you. He feels his hand twitch.

Your pussy is still wet as if he’d been playing with it for hours, and your chest is filled with waves of emotions, all surrounding the one man who’s eyes remain on you. You’re annoyed with how satisfied he is watching you be pathetic, embarrassed at how desperate you’re acting, but all of that is simply overshadowed by the straight flood of desire in you. Your mind only screams Jongho, Jongho, Jongho.

Your tiny hands shake in frustration with every push you give into yourself, “‘S so- I c-can’t! Jjongie, I can’t, p-please just-“

You’re so cute. So, so cute, and his cock jumps when a tear slips down your cheek. He sighs and moves slowly towards you, like you’re a nuisance, like his gut isn’t on fire right now and his mind is clouded with need. He finally reaches you, leaning down towards you and setting both arms besides your head, trapping you. The sound of your squelching pussy is still heard, and his tummy swirls with your adorably love sick grin.

The way your entire body relaxes once his hand reaches towards your clit makes him giggle, “So cute. You just wanted my attention, didn’t you? You want me to make you cum?”

“Please, Jjongie want it so bad-“

God, how he loves when you beg. He loves how embarrassed you get when he teases you outside of sex, how he’ll remind you of how much of a slut you are for him when you’re being a brat. He loves how you submit yourself to him, how much you enjoy being his plaything. It comforts him to know you trust him this much. But it’s also just really fucking hot how wet you get.

His pointer fingers rub at your clit, gliding easily in circle motions with the help of your slick, “Pretty, pretty girl…”

Jongho’s quiet praises push you off the edge, your entire body writhing as the pleasure takes control of you and makes you twitch in ecstasy. He mumbles more encouraging words that you don’t really hear, but the sound of his voice is just enough to push you through.

There’s a soft, timid thumb caressing your hip when you come to, “Couldn’t wait for me to come home?”

bom note: we are so back. i had to for my freakribos. anyways what r ur thoughts on mutual masturbation san or typical stuck-porn scenario san?

[succubusvalentine]

Geta who eats you out on his throne. Geta has taken over my entire mind and this needs to come out or I'll explode actually! CW : Pussy eating, slight exhibitionism, almost getting caught.

Geta had been showing you the area where he and Caracalla sit during the Gladiator Games. A proud crooked smile on his face. It would be your first time viewing the games from such an angle.

Geta grabbed ahold of your hips and had you sit down in his throne. And when you looked up at him, his eyes flickered with possessiveness. As if you sitting in his throne meant that he owned you.

Geta hummed as he stared at you. His eyes trailing over your stola. "You look good like this, my dear" Geta rumbled.

"I'd hope I look good to you all the time, Geta" you say softly, which makes the emperor chuckle, his hands landing on your knees, rubbing up and down your thighs.

"You know you do" Geta hummed, pushing your stola embroidered with gold thread, up your legs. And you hold the fabric against your lower stomach.

Geta continued to run his hands up and down your thighs, his touch felt as though your blood burned with need. The Emperor always had such an effect on you. His rings sending a shiver down your spine from the chill of them.

"Must you always tease, Geta?"

"Of course I must. I enjoy watching you become desperate for me"

You groaned in frustration at that. Your cunt was throbbing desperately now. Feeling how sticky your panties had become.

You sighed in relief when Geta finally tugged your panties down, his hands grabbing your thighs and spreading them wide open so he'd have all access to what he called, "nectar from the Gods".

you gasped quietly as Geta buried his nose in the tuft of hair on your mound. he always loved smelling your natural scent, despite how flustered it made you.

Then you felt his tongue glide up between your wet folds. Your hips jolting at the contact.

"Geta!" You huffed impatiently. Moaning as Geta began to suck on your clit.

Your hands glided down to his hair, tugged the locks as your hips grind forward into Geta's insatiable mouth. His tongue lapping into you, as if he was stuck in the desert and your cunt was the oasis he'd been praying for.

Geta had eaten you out plenty of times. But this was by far the best. You had the sun shining down on you, Geta's mouth on your pussy, and the thrill of the idea that anyone could see you.

"Emperor?!" a guard called out, you weren't sure from where. But it made you jolt and look down at Geta with wide eyes.

"Geta! Geta, a guard is going to see us!" you whisper in panic.

Geta pulls away, licking his lips. "Then I suggest you come in my mouth before he finds us" he grinned, before diving back in. Making you whimper desperately. Nodding in agreement.

You try to muffle your moans and whimpers as Geta doubles his efforts. Covering your mouth and tipping your head back to rest against the back of the throne.

"Close!" You moan into your hand, just loud enough for Geta to hear.

"Emperor?! Are you up here?! You have a meeting with the council!" The guard called out, just as the coil in your stomach began to rapidly tighten.

Geta then began humming around your clit. Your hand slamming down on the arm rest of the throne as you unexpectedly came.

Your orgasm ripped through you, feeling as though every nerve in your body was alight. Your eyes rolling back.

When you finally came down from the high, Geta had pulled your panties back up and smoothed out your stola. Having stood up as the guard finally found the two of you.

"Ah, Emperor Geta" the guard said as he walked over. "I was worried you would miss your meeting with the council"

"Unfortunately I will be missing the meeting. As you can see, my fairest has tired herself out and I will be joining her in my chambers" Geta said with his usual smug smile. Making you glare at him with a scoff.

⛧°. ⋆𓌹♰𓌺⋆. °⛧

[prlssprfctn]

I awfully need a fic, where Jason gets drugged by a big dose of fear toxin and starts seeing Joker's hallucination around — kind of like Bruce in Arkham Knight game, you know — and everyone is just... confused what to do with all of it?

They can't really produce antidote because it would fuck up his mind more, so he is stuck in the cave for the next 24 hours, and no one is leaving, because they can't allow Jason to go through this alone. Again.

Jason tries to put a brave face of course (god, he is THE Red Hood, one of the most influential people in the Gotham, he can't be afraid of a stupid clown–) but the more hours pass, the less he can control his fear or anxiety. Instead of pacing around like a ghost — he did that in the first four hours — he sits down on the couch, hugs himself, and starts answering to Joker?

Yeah, he knows he is not real. He understands that feeding hallucination with conversations will not help — and Dick, the ultimate expert in handling hallucinations, really, gave him some tips on what to do — but he can't just ignore it now.

He is too scared.

He remembers what comes if he flips off Joker or stops playing by his rules, alright?

"Knock, knock!"

Joker's face is as pale and terrifying as Jason remembers it to be. And maybe it is hallucination, but he still can feel his panted, hot breath on his ear.

He is alone, of course. Or not entirely alone, but others would notice if Joker was really here, right?

"Who is this?" He whispers, sensing his family tensing a little, not being sure what to expect.

Jason either argues with his hallucination or asks to stop. Or maybe just wordlessly scraps on his temples or cheek, in the place the J scar used to be, before the Lazarus Pit erased it from his body completely, leaving no traces.

"The stray dog that can't bark! Do you know why it can not bark, Jayjay?"

"I don't fucking know," he murmurs, but the fiericness with which he screamed at this man for hours now is gone; he sounds tired even to his own ears, and it is embarrassing. "Tell me."

"Because I broke its bones with a crowbar, silly!~" Joker shakes his shoulders, and Jason can practically feel the familiar ache of shattered bones. "It– Ahahah, it is too hurt to bark! It can only whine!"

Jason laughs.

His facial expression doesn't really change — he is still frowning a little — but he laughs with a painful wheeze. Joker is pleased enough to sigh dreamily in his ear.

Good job, Jason.

"What so funny?" Dick asks carefully, a patient smile on his face — he has been trying to distract him with conversations the most; Bruce prefers to keep his silence, and Tim thinks accidental physical touches help more than talking.

"He just said a joke," Jason shrugs weakily.

"Tell it to them," Joker orders. "Let us all laugh."

He doesn't really want to. But he can't disobey. He can't allow himself to die again, and–

"Knock, knock," he clears up his throat.

"Who is this?" Tim echoes, turning his chair to him, smart eyes scanning him up and down.

"The stray dog that can't bark," Jason tugs the tips of his own hair. "Do you know why it can not bark?"

Bruce tenses in his chair. He tenses in a way, Jason thinks, he already knows this joke; he has already heard it before. He almost looks as if he wants to stop him, cut mid-sentence.

But for some reason, he doesn't.

"Uh, why?" Dick tilts his head.

"Because my– its bones are broken," Jason stutters. "You know, dogs can't really bark when they are hurt? Just whine."

He can't bring himself to laugh again, even though Joker keeps giggling over and over.

"That's not funny, Jay," Tim murmurs.

"Yeah. I guess it isn't. But if I don't laugh, he'll get the crowbar again, and I really, really want to keep barking," Jason smiles.

He tries to ignore pitful glances of his family members, and the torture continues. No one breaks his bones this time, but Jason still whines when Bruce hugs him by the end of the night, pressing to his chest.

Joker is not here anymore, but Jason still can hear his taunting whisper, somewhere in the back of his head.

You will die his son.

[drdawnbreaker]

𝐀 𝐁𝐥𝐚𝐳𝐞 𝐈𝐧 𝐒𝐨𝐥𝐢𝐝 𝐈𝐜𝐞 || 𝐁.𝐁

Pairing: Winter Soldier x HydraPrisoner!Reader

Summary: Soldat, and you have been through so much in such little time. And now, you have to navigate the looming storm of snow and rising tension. Can Soldat keep you from slipping over the edge or will you just end up falling together?

Word Count: 1.49k

Warnings: Blood. Canon level violence. Non-sexual nudity. Tension. This is basically just naked cuddles by an open fire. What can i say, I'm a romantic.

Notes: I didn't expect to write something so long, but here i am, ahah. This was heavily inspired by @winterarmyy fic with Bucky, hehe. Anyhoo enjoyy. Not beta read. Yolo. Also, this is my first full fic, i guess... ahhhh. So please go easy on mee argh xx

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Imagine You and The Winter Soldier are fleeing, running for your lives in the wet and cold night. The gravelled roads covered in a blizzard of thick snow. Your body is soaked from rain, blood, dirt, and god knows what else.

Soldat never said a word as he tracked closely in front of you, creating a path with his long, thick legs, letting you walk without much effort, unlike him who is starting to feel the burn of his muscles and the sting in his lungs. But he would never tell you, he would rather break all his bones in his body than risk any discomfort to you. Not ever again.

Soldat pushed open the heavy door with his metal shoulder, the cracking sound of snapping wood echoed in the vast silence of the lonely woods that hid more than fifty-ish gaurds from the hydra base they had just broken out from. You stumbled in behind him, your breath creating little clouds as you sighed deeply as you almost tripped into Soladts' large back.

Your thin clothes that Hydra forced you to wear while you were stuck in your cell and soldats tactical gear was soaked, stained, clinging to his skin. It was like a reminder of the struggle he went through to get you out. He had taken the brunt of the most brutal confrontations, but the scars of your escape marked both of you—physically and mentally.

As the door slammed shut with a heavy thud, a cold shiver coursed through you, making you very aware of the biting chill that seeped into your bones, rattling your body with a familiar emotion... Fear. Soldat noticed your discomfort. His steel, almost grey eyes, were shadowed with concern. “There is no power. Too risky,” he muttered, his voice low and husky. “But we need to get warm.”

Without another word, grunt, or whimper, Soldat moved like lightning towards various cupboards, tossing through cobwebs, dust, and strange bugs before finally finding an old stack of firewood. Well, most like cheap chip wood, but it'll burn enough to get you warm.

You watched him as he arranged all the wood in the fireplace, not even seemingly taking a breath until it was complete. The flicker of warmth that the flame produced would simmer you down only momentarily before another shiver ran down your body as the wet melting snow pooled against your skin from the soaked fabric.

"Here,” he called, gesturing to try beside the fire, his voice steady despite the storm outside. Yet you somehow knew that he was panicked deep inside. Worried about yours and his safety. Morely yours, but you try not to think about that. “Get closer to the fire.”

You obliged without a word, positioning yourself on your knees before the flames, but quickly realized that the heat was barely wrapping around you. The cold still seeped into your chest, gnawing at your skin. Soldat threw more wood in, but time was not a luxury you had, it seemed. No, as your eyes grew heavy and your shallow breath slowed, Soldat needed to find a solution quick before you surely died from hypothermia. He grunted through his nose as he watched you for a moment more before speaking...

“Strip,” he said, gravelled and bluntly. It made you freeze, cheeks flushing as your slowed heart began to race.

What? Is he serious? You blinked at him in shock as uneasy laughter bubbled up, tinged with embarrassment. He can't actually be serious... Right?

“Soldat, I—” you started, but then he cut you off by speeding down the hall before you could process his request. You sat there stunned and trembling. Confusion warred with the urgency of your situation, the biting cold gripped you tighter, but now a heat pooled inside you, one you always managed to keep hidden until now.

With a deep, shaky breath, you hastily stripped off your damp clothes. The chill of the room made every inch of exposed skin tighten, and you quickly slipped into your underwear. Just as you pulled the last layer away, Soldat re-entered the room, his arms holding a bunch of blankets and pillows. He dropped them carelessly on the floor, but carefully not to get any in the fire or on the wet pile of clothes you created. He began to arrange them with determination, making a makeshift bed. Almost like a nest or cocoon.

"You have to get warm." He states, letting you see the determination in his wild eyes. You hugged your arms around yourself tightly, still feeling in the heat of embarrassment, being almost bare in front of the only person in your life who ever showed care for you.

“The underwear isn’t helping,” he stated flatly, as if the gravity of the situation was the only thing at play, almost completely ignoring the circular emotions churning in the space between you and him. The tension that has been brewing since the first day your cells were side by side. Since the first time you used your abilities to sneak into his cell and hold him, let him know he wasn't alone while using your powers to soothe his torturous mind.

Your heart raced as you met his gaze. “Can you... uh c-can you close your eyes, please?”

He chuckled softly, a lightness breaking through the tension. “Alright,” he said, feigning nonchalance as he covered his eyes with his metal hand, though a ghost of a smile lingered on his lips. Something was almost foreign about a smile on the Soldats, but he had grown to have one when only you were around.

With shaking fingers, you slipped your last barrier away, letting the wet bra and panties all alongside the other wet fabric before you dived for the blankets, mortified and relieved at once, your heart hammering wildly. “Okay...I’m done,” you called, hoping to mask your vulnerability and embarrassment with the soft cupboard smelling duvet

He opened his eyes, pulling his hand away. The warmth of the fire reflected off you, a hint of satisfaction finally grazed in his expression. You shifted slightly, the blankets cocooning you with newfound warmth, but the icy sensation still danced inside your chest. You shivered again

Soldat could hear the way your body was still craving heat and as he swore under his breath as the silence stretched thick with the unspoken tension. He knew he needed to do something. So he started to strip himself of his own wet clothes, revealing the chiselled muscles and scars that told stories of his torment...of battles fought and lost. He reached for his belt, and it made you suddenly speak up with an eep in your voice.

“W-what are you doing?” You blurted out, the absurdity of the situation slamming into you like a train as he slipped off his pants, boots, and underwear until he was completely bare in front of you. You didn't mean to cast your gazs lower, but before you could even get a good look at him, he was under the blankets beside you. Skin suddenly against skin.

“I need to keep you alive,” he replied with a gruffness that softened under the weight of his intentions. He pulled you close, lifting the blanket over both of you to create more warmth.

Your body instinctively moulded against his, seeking the refuge of his body heat even though your mind was racing at the idea of being this close to the soldie while completely naked.. As his heartbeat thrummed beneath your ear, you inhaled his scent without thought—an intoxicating mix of woodsmoke and something uniquely him. It made your heart ache and twist with butterflies. And as the storm outside raged on, you felt a surreal sense of safety wrapped in his strong embrace.

You buried your cold nose into his chest, feeling the fear, the stress, all of it melt away with every passing second. “You’ll be okay,” he murmured, fingers gently brushing through your hair as if he was soothing both of you to rest.

In that moment, there was a clarity of peace that felt sacred. It was something neither of you had felt in years, decades... It was as if the world had fallen away, problems and fears non-existent by the closeness you shared with him. A refuge built on trust forged in darkness and chaos.

Even though none of you predicted this moment, the sleepiness began to claim you both, weight of conflict fading like melting snow.

Soldat's warmth surrounded you, lulling you into a quiet dreamland. And that night, amidst the storm, with the fire crackling softly, Soldat mended the fractures within both of you if only just for a moment. And that night was the first night Soldat slept without the fear of the demons to raid his mind. No, the only thought he could think of was that he had you safe and away from the sinister grasps of hyrda. You were both finally free.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Bestie Deficiency

[First] Prev <–-> Next

[ganondoodle]

(forces myself to stop playing stardew so i can get some progress done on my art projects- daydreams the entire first arc of my original story stuff -again- for 2 hours)

[orcelito]

Did driving practice today. Actually did parallel parking practice this time, even tho I really didn't want to still. Finally got it into my head that I can maybe do this.

SO......

I have scheduled my driving test. For November 13th, 3 weeks from today.

[vanweezer]

very very personal, just insight into where im at w my family and things that bother me/have encouraged me to move out

"i know youre moving out so im just gonna say no ones kicking you out and if you feel like this is something you have to do then ok"

thanks! i know im not being kicked out! but yknow i kinda yet a weird vibe when your out of touch husband takes me to a cemetery to yell at me, tell me im just like my father/dont give my father "the time of day", and that im "mean to people who care about me" in front of his dead mother's grave in a poor attempt at guilting me out of speaking my mind. but no yeah thanks for stating the fucking obvious that im leaving on my own terms

[uitzinnigmp3]

.

[b-blushes]

you know when you're in da overwhelm zone due to Circumstances that you don't really have power over. well it's really hard to deescalate from that i am finding!

HOWEVER i am attempting:

FACING THE THINGS because the longer they loom. the longer they are looming for.

regular breaks from Addressing Everything

regular snacks/meals/drinks

prioritising

postponing stuff that can be left until later (But watch out!)

doing other things in advance that are easy to do now (such as stockpiling meals ready for feeling more ill)

asking for help where i can

[monstriiss]

.

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[obstinaterixatrix]

air was telling me about that ultimatum reality dating show thing & that’s crazy. I know it’s probably mostly the aromanticism but I can’t imagine clinging to someone when you’re at the point of making an ultimatum. I’d just leave.

[pepprs]

update counselor breakup email scheduled to send at 8:48 am tomorrow 🥳

[madesofgold]

.