#myoclonic

[schar-aac]

"myoclonic"

Images: A person with motion lines around their head and arm. Their head is tilted a little, and their arm is jerking inwards. In the first three pictures, they have glasses, a formal shirt, and a watch or bracelet. In the first picture, they have brown skin, black hair, and a pale blue shirt. In the second, they have pale skin, brown hair, and a pale blue shirt. In the third, they have light brown skin, dark hair, and an off-white shirt. In the fourth, they are emoji yellow and featureless.

--

requested by @lavcommunicatez

[sydmarch]

evrart for the meme :3

First impression

so when i first started playing disco i was in a v weird mental state where i was easily put on edge by everything (looking back that might have not been a good idea objectively lmao.. but i had fun w it) & bcus of that his portrait was SOOOO freaky to me at first like, i didn't wanna look at it LOL. also i thought his voice was annoying as hell before i got used to it & now it's weirdly grown on me (altho i also think garte's stupid nasally voice is kinda hot so that's probably just me having cringefail taste <3) the "fuck this guy 😑" to "fuck this guy 😏" pipeline is real.

Impression now

(said in the cadence as when laszlo says "he’s my best friend, he’s my pal, he’s my homeboy, my rotten soldier, my sweet cheese, my good time boy") now he is my meow meow boy my problematic fav my guy-who-sucks-but-its-ok-bcus-i-babygirlify-him. so he wants to force everyone out of the village w the construction noise & he and his brother had someone killed so they could take over the union, god forbid women do anything 🙄

Favorite moment

THIS

& i have to link this post bcus it sums it up better than i ever could

Idea for a story

ok so after being reminded that this interaction exists

i neeeeeed to write a fic where after this evrart calls garte to his office & is like "you're not going to give my special boy harry any more trouble are you?" and just puts him in his place. "a real piece of work" absolutely just translates to garte being a bratty sub i'm sorry but it's true.

Unpopular opinion

besides the whole i would suck him so silly thing i truly don't think he's as bad as some people make him out to be like yeah OBVIOUSLY he's done plenty of pretty bad shit & i'm not saying he hasn't but i don't think he's like, EVIL the way some people seem to & i don't think all of his motivations are as selfish as they appear on a surface level reading

Favorite relationship

EVRART/HARRY like everything that's going on between them is fucking insane. "But to me -- and the census bureau -- you will always be little Harry" "Of course you're not, Harry, You're my special boy!" i could keep searching fayde for more of these but it's rotting my brain. just fuck each other already for god's sake

Favorite headcanon

i forget who it was that made the post that was like evrart totally intends for elizabeth to be his successor & sees her in a fatherly way but i LOVE that idea. like yes obviously a motivation to pay to send her to law school is "it's useful to have a lawyer indebted to you" but i like to think it isn't JUST that & he has more depth than some people give him credit for.

[capnsoapy]

I love my sense of self! I'm glad I'm dressing up nice and pursuing my dreams and making friends and always creating! I'm a real person! :")

fuck yeah! you exist!

[confused-and-queer]

I need some advice on whether I’m having myoclonic seizures. (I am waiting for a doctor’s appointment but I just really want to know what’s going on.)

I have these full body jolts/glitches sometimes, have done for as long as I can remember. I can go days and even weeks without one and most of the time they’re isolated, although I did have a cluster of them last year which resulted in me throwing my phone and dropping a fork. I get confused and disoriented for a few seconds after each one and when I had the cluster I found it difficult to walk for a few minutes afterwards.

I don’t have any other types of “seizures” (in quotations because I don’t know if they’re seizures yet). I don’t really have auras either? When I had my cluster I could kind of tell if I was going to jerk again but when they’re isolated I can’t.

Please, I could really use some advice on this. From what I’ve seen of myoclonic seizures it looks like what I’m experiencing and I’m concerned.

The tags below are NOT me self diagnosing, it’s so people who experience seizures can see my post and offer any insight if they would like to.

[ur-fav-bpd]

Vittorino from 8:11 has BPD, autism, and myoclonic seizures!

[pulsar-ray]

y'all do you lose consciousness for a second during a myoclonic jerk do you lose your sight & senses are you Unable to move right after.

can you have jerks & other types of seizures/seizure like symptoms. like Absence seizures & Clonic seizures

do you get Aura for muscle jerks that aren't seizures followed by MULTIPLE types of seizures/seizure like symptoms in a row.

genq i feel like the doctor who told me it was psychosomatic ignored everything else i said including the fact that i Was in fact throwing things & having other types of seizures symptoms

[peerlessscowl]

Myoclonic Jerk

wyvern rider mastery; word count - 880

There were some fears that a man, even those of the most unshakable disposition, could not have conditioned out. Loss of control, having it wrested from his hands, cold-fingered and methodical; isolation, ostracization, the heavy burden of failure a weight to make even the straightest of spines bend.

The feeling of drifting through a nightmare so well-crafted as to be indistinguishable from waking, but for the idle vapidity, the crushing dread making a dense, cold pit in his gut.

Perhaps that last one was only his.

It had not been in the cards for him to fly, in Elibe. Not even when he had been the proud noble son of a well-respected family - there were clear delineations as to who was flying, and for what, and a good Lycian boy would not be one of the ordained few to see the skies.

The first time Raven had mounted a flighted creature, he had been asleep - or near enough to it - atop a winged creature that no Elibean man had ever been granted the grace to ride: a pegasus. The experience was an infuriating one, and had been followed by the equally harrowing dream in what was not Valentia.

In between the dream states and the smear of the waking world around him afterward, it had not occurred to him to be afraid of heights - he had remembered the feeling of exhilaration of rising above the clouds, the feeling of weightlessness and his heart rising to his throat and dropping to his knees simultaneously, and in his private moments he might have admitted it was the first time in a long time that he had felt free.

But dying, and coming back from death, had shifted his expectations, it seemed - the first real mount that he'd had was one of the elder wyverns in the monastery stables (was it? or were those deaths equally dream, equally unreal, something further in this world with no consequences for the harsh realities of the world?), and it rose on leathery wings, with poor eyesight, but it rose nonetheless. And he understood what it felt like to see the ground, solid and stable and waiting, hundreds of feet below.

If his memory was to be believed - something he'd never needed to question until now, had always been able to trust at least in himself to guide him true, but this place was strange and seemed to have taken more from him than he'd been willing to give - then the wyverns themselves knew something of dying and returning. He had been there, he thought, when the flock had been culled by the mysterious cold, he had felt them in his hands as he put them into the ground, he knew it, that feeling had been real, and he had been there to peel eggshell and membrane from the heads of those few that had come into the world.

This too had been real, it had to have been.

One of the babes had bit him, hard enough for blood, and he found the small half-moon on the tip of his finger grounding.

For the first few months of her life, one of the wyverns had elected to sleep curled on his chest, when it could get away with it. At first he did not know if it was for warmth, or if it had imprinted on him, but on more than one occasion he had jerked awake to find its claws kneading against the front of his tunic. She could have been moved, he supposed, returned to her nest with her kin.

He didn't try very hard. She shivered and twitched and mewled, and he raised a groggy hand to rest against her side until she came back to calm.

As time went on, she grew larger - too large to make his chest her bed, but she still found ways back to him, either curled on the rug on his floor, or he leaned back supported by one of her flanks in the lofts of the wyvern stables. Not every time, but with some consistency, she trembled - sometimes the tiniest tremors, the movement of a dreaming dog in chase, but others in distress, clear with the flaring of her wings buffeting against the walls.

He would rouse, and take her head in his palms, and murmur to her until she came to stillness, back to restfulness.

"Gentle, Beathe. Gentle. Calm down."

His own sleep had been so poor that it had not seemed like much, an absent-minded thing to do since he was awake anyway, but over time Raven, too, came to restfulness, finding his own sleep with the beast at his side.

And when the line blurred between dream and waking crept upon him, and he found that he could not have distinguished them - for the dreams never left a man like him, ever intangible, ever perplexing, wrenching and twisting in his guts - he would feel the telltale jerk of falling into sleep, followed by the gentlest nudge.

She grew, larger by the day, until the time came for her to be mounted as well, to take to the skies with her rider.

Raven found the ground an afterthought, no longer inviting, teasing, with its open arms. He had no need of fear, not here.

[lopeirce]

I’m 7 years seizure free today friends. 🥹

[semiotomatics]

hmmm

so i think i might be having seizures?

[themmatennant]

eyyyy got perscribed a new epilepsy medication today lets gooooo

[disabledsysboxes]

Types of epilepsy / seizure disorders - 1

Requested anonymously

[sydmarch]

1! :3

What are three shows in your watchlist that you’ve been meaning to get to?

it takes me like ten years to get around to watching a show but

-latest wwdits season

-severance

-mr robot rewatch

[capnsoapy]

23 :-)

23. If you could send a message to yourself back on the first day of the year, what would it be? Oh god. Realistically I'd panic about causality too much to say anything. But I wish someone could have told me that even when things get rough, there are people who love and care about me. It's been a hard year for it sometimes

[snakegentleman]

In flare up hell ✌️

So there’s this wild thing that I’ve developed over the last few months where, sometimes, when I try to go to sleep, I get the weird falling sensation you get randomly when you’re going from being half asleep to all the way asleep and it jolts you awake. But instead of being a one off thing that happens randomly, it happens over and over again in one night preventing me from sleeping. Most of the time, I have to wake myself up completely and go read or something for an hour to get it to go away. Sometimes I think it’s a type of hyper vigilance due to some medical paranoia I’ve developed, but like, last night, it happened and I wasn’t having that so that was just strange. Anyway, long story short, I ended up not going to bed until 7:30 in the morning. So fun 😃

[watermelinoe]

i miss my lily girl so much this fucking sucks i hate it here

[ribbitflings]

anyone have any papers on generalized epileptic seizures triggering a PTSD relapse

I tend to like to collect scholarly papers on various subjects, this being one since it happens to be a more personal subject.

December has been a rough month personally and when it came to seizures, beginning with a lot of relational problems and devastating realizations and so far I have thirteen major seizure events on my calendar, not even including individual seizures during those events (because they can cluster). I ended up having a bad PTSD relapse during this month, pretty sure this is the worst one yet, complete with multiple kinds of hallucinations, flashbacks, nightmares, the works. I even ended up hallucinating in a postictal state and having a panic attack over it after a recent generalized seizure. I have a suspicion that the flashbacks and PTSD symptoms are worse after the more violent seizures as well, which leads me to believe it is the seizures activating these areas.

I'm on zonisamide and keppra and have been watching a little more TV than usual (important because it tends to give me anxiety, especially if what I'm watching has action scenes or is unfamiliar), so the relapse could also be from one of these things, or even the events that occurred at the beginning of the month, or perhaps even everything combined.

My current theory is that the seizures will generalize and activate the areas of the brain with the trauma, and considering my state was already fragile to begin with, it kind of facilitated a collapse. I currently only have one paper (Koubeissi, M. Z. (2012). Vivid recollection of a past traumatic event: A rare manifestation of temporal lobe seizures. Epileptic Disorders, 14(3), 325–328. https://doi.org/10.1684/epd.2012.0530) on the subject from a prior experience this summer that prompted this finding, so it isn't necessarily new to me, but at the same time, just as unsettling and infuriating. Anyway, does anyone else have any more papers on this particular subject?