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mistresslrigtar · 6 months ago
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The Beekeeper is a masterpiece of a movie. Who ever wrote it deserves an Oscar.
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mistresslrigtar · 3 months ago
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I love the Aliens franchise so much I paid tribute to it in my modern grad school AU I Belong to You. Full story is available on AO3 HERE
Rated E for language and other stuff....
Aliens tribute here (inspired by the truly awful sequel Alien: Resurrection):
The movie faded in on a sterile white room with a single biobed sitting in the middle on the grated metal floor. A control panel on the side of the bed lit up, and blue Sheikah writing began scrolling across the screen. Hissing, the clear plexiglass lid of the biobed lifted up as the camera panned in to show famous Sheikah scientist and Guardian expert, Purah lying in a pool of blue liquid, sound asleep. Her eyes moved rapidly behind her eyelids, and her fingers twitched as the liquid drained from the bed into the floor.
Buzzing offscreen is quickly followed by the swooshing sound of a door opening. A short-statured male Sheikah scientist wearing absurd aviator goggles on his forehead stepped into view.
“Eureka!” he whispered to the empty room. “She’s alive!” He bent over the bed and whispered in her ear. “Open your eyes…open your eyes…wake up, Purah!”
“What the fuck?” Link glanced over at Zelda with wide eyes. “How the hell is she alive?” Zelda shook her head and shrugged.
The camera slowly panned back to Purah, whose eyes were now open. Slowly she sat up and looked about her surroundings, mouth a grim thin line, and her pale eyebrows bunched together as she tried to understand what was happening.
The male Sheikah gently took her hand and guided her so her legs dangled off the edge of the bed. “Do you know where you are, Purah?”
Blinking slowly, Purah peered at the man. “Who are you?”
“I’m Robbie, Sheikah scientist extraordinaire!” He waved his hand with a flourish and struck a pose, pointing his finger to the ceiling.
Purah shook her head. “Where am I?”
“We need your help, Purah! The Guardians have risen and taken over Hyrule! No one knows how to defeat them, so we resurrected you!” Eyebrows bunching together, Robbie’s pale blue eyes stared earnestly at Purah, begging her to understand.
Purah’s eyes widened, and she raised a shaking hand to slap her brow. “Check it! You did what, you mother******?!”
“Oh, this movie is going to be ba-had.” Link must have been reading her mind since Zelda had just been thinking about Urbosa’s warning. Reaching over, he took her hand, and every time something happened that one of them thought was utterly ridiculous, they squeezed hands.
Rising silently from the depths of the lava pit below him, a Guardian’s towering figure lurked menacingly behind an unsuspecting Robbie, raising one of its clawed arms with malicious intent. Without warning, the monstrous machine lashed out, striking Robbie and quickly withdrawing its claw, sending Robbie’s goggles to soar through the air before tumbling to the ground.
Wide-eyed, Robbie slowly reached behind his head, a horrified expression overtaking his face. Holding his hand in front of his eyes, he examined the gray, pulpy mass he held between trembling fingers.
Realization hit him like a thunderbolt. “Ho—hoooooooo! Is this — brain?!”
Zelda squeezed Link’s hand.
Robbie’s pale blue eyes lit up with equal parts delight and horror as if a switch had been flipped. “Eureka! I’m aliiiiiive!!!”
Link squeezed Zelda’s hand.
Those were the famous scientist’s last words before the Guardian struck again with excessive force. With brutal precision, it lifted the Sheikah scientist above its head, tearing him limb from limb; his screams echoed through the speakers scattered throughout the theater. The Guardian tossed the lifeless remains into the churning lava pool below the catwalk, faint splashes, and steam vented as Robbie’s body sank beneath the fiery depths. The Guardian resumed its silent vigil, its eerie red eye sweeping across the screen.
Zelda’s jaw dropped, and she wrapped her arm around herself at the excessive violence. Link squeezed her hand tightly and looked over at her. “Uh, he should have brought his shield.”
With his whispered words, Zelda’s shoulders began to shake, and she soon giggled uncontrollably. She had to cover her mouth to keep her laughter from disturbing the audience members around them.
“Awwwwww no!” Purah entered the scene with a repurposed Sheikah Slate and quickly chose stasis. Aiming the slate at the looming Guardian, she froze it, and then pulling a humongous sword off her back, she ran down the gangplank and took a flying leap. Raising the sword above her head, she landed on top of the Guardian and sunk the blade deep into its blazing red eye.
“Click!” She twisted the sword and wrenched the Guardian’s power cell from its dangling eye socket. “Snap!” And swinging the sword like a baseball bat sent the glowing cell flying off into the lavafall behind her.
“Awwwww yeah!” She raised the Sheikah slate above her head triumphantly. “Check it! Nobody messes with Purah, Sheikah scientist extraordinaire!”
Link squeezed Zelda’s hand and leaned over to whisper in her ear, sending shivers down her spine. “She’s got nothing on Zelda, smokin’ scientist extraordinaire.”
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ALIENS (1986) dir. James Cameron
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lifenconcepts · 3 months ago
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Tf you mean people don’t keep their bedroom windows open for long amounts of time? You ACTUALY close it at night?? Dude.. I haven’t closed my window since give or take a bit around the start of spring.. and even as im freezing my bone off I refuse to close it completely - I NEED the circulating air. Do inform me.. is it actually common practice to close your window at night?
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the-magnus-protocol · 6 months ago
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Tma + tmagp art masterpost
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redvelvetwishtree · 1 year ago
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paintedcrows · 3 months ago
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Gravity Text Post (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
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lemongogo · 3 months ago
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life of regret
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fox-mulder-gets-pegged · 2 years ago
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I just wanna say bc I KNOW you're somewhere on tumblr, to the teenage girl who attended Take Your Kid To Work Day at an office building in Ontario, Canada circa 2013 and had a conversation with a middle aged woman in which you showed her your Black Veil Brides fanart and fanfics and ship content and told her about different fanfic tropes including a/b/o verse bc she happened to know who Panic! at The Disco and Fallout Boy were and thus you felt the need to show her your bandblr ship art, that was my fucking mother and I had to clarify all that to her including looking my mother in the eye and trying to explain a/b/o verse without sounding like a lunatic.
It's been 10 years and I still regularly sent evil energies in your direction. Since you'd be probably two years younger than me and thus legally an adult now, please know if this post reaches you it's on sight.
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wasyago · 9 months ago
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quiet hours
closeups under the cut :]
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i really like these
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mistresslrigtar · 5 months ago
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Personal post: Wow! It’s been a couple of really rough days. Probably isn’t going to get better anytime soon. Trying to stay positive. But the hits keep coming. Hopefully, today is the last of the bombs to drop and while it’s going to be tough and scary, it’ll get better. Eventually. It always does.
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bluegiragi · 1 month ago
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i drew johnny "soap" mactavish as phreak (the original design) from overwatch.
bonus (just for fun):
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waterthatsmoe · 2 months ago
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First years shenanigans
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Bonus jack
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somegurl8 · 2 months ago
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inbarfink · 8 months ago
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Congratulations! You are now a Magic-User!!
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threateningwatercress · 4 months ago
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their combined level of freak is unmatched
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stump-not-found · 3 months ago
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A Lifetime Served in a Little Cup
pt.1 / pt.2 / pt.3 / pt.4
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bill, babygirl, the red flags get outta there
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