#my people deserve to live
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https://www.tumblr.com/our-blood-is-our-ink/730930961393549312/im-exhausted-of-living-through-historical-once-in?source=share
if it conforts you (probably won't) almost every generation lived through an historical moment... world wars, different pandemics, going all the way back to colonialism. Something important is always happening, and probably other people from the past thought they were the "unlucky" ones...
idk, i just always think of this when someone says stuff like that...
Hi I have zero idea how you meant this but I'm going to be real for a moment.
But before I do, I apologize, as I went on a flow of thought tangent. Primarily, my thoughts have been racing, and it seems to have spilled out to here.
First and foremost, please never come onto a Jewish person's blog, good intent or otherwise, and say something like this.
This is not me feeling unlucky. This is me recognizing the patterns of history repeating itself.
I used to fight with my Hebrew day school teachers when they would teach us about Jewish history, Historia. Because surely, they were wrong. Surely as a whole, people don't hate the Jewish people that much. That another Holocaust could even be a threat. That yet another country will kick my people out of their homes, penniless, for the crime of their culture and religion. That we won't be kicked out from our fucking homeland for the billionth time. (I acknowledge the right of everyone else who considers Israel to be their homeland, everyone deserves to be able to live where they originate from.)
But they were right. And I hate saying that. I hate finding myself agreeing with people who I fundamentally disagreed with the most, because I found as a child, as a student, that their empathy for others lacking.
I can now recognize, wrong as that lack of empathy may be, that it is a product of generations of hate and suffering being inflicted upon the Jewish nation.
It's a jadedness I'm well aware I'm now gaining. This inescapable knowledge that no where is safe. That my half-sister, not even two months, would gain no consideration for her life simply because she's Jewish. That my best friend's daughter, barely two weeks old won't get any consideration to her life, for the crime of her heritage.
I have to sit and live with the knowledge world wide people are openly supporting Hamas in the murder of innocent children. Toddlers. Babies. Infants.
That there are chants being raised of gas the Jews.
Do you know how terrifying that is? To be faced with undeniable proof that there are literally thousands, if not millions of people who want my family and friends -- want me -- dead?
Do you know how gut-wrenching it is that I have to face this realization of "oh, no wonder FDR was able to turn away boatfuls of refugees back to Germany to be slaughter -- Jewish lives don't matter as much to the world as other lived do", of "no wonder my people have faced violence and brutality (such as progoms) for centuries for the simple crime of living" because the truth is, when we need voices raised in support for us the most, there's only silence ringing that can be heard.
And don't think that the Jewish people haven't noticed that most of the more influential folks who don't have any potential political gain out of this war have been Jewish, or have strong Jewish connections. Don't think we aren't aware of how wildly alone we are in this.
And y'all want to know the worst part?
I'm starting to believe that the majority of the secular world would have been happier if Hitler had succeeded in his goals. And that's fucking crushing.
An important note: make no mistake. I don't support any war crimes or inhumane actions done by the Israeli government. I don't support the death and suffering of innocents. I acknowledge that there is much pain and horror and suffering on both sides of this war. I am simply relating my experiences and thoughts, as is anyone's right. I believe the Palestinians have just as much as a right to live peacefully in the land currently known as Israel as much as any Christian, Muslim, or Jew does. Period.
#sky's inbox#sky answers#sky replies#sky's anons#i understand I have said some things that are bound to be taken controversially#i ask that if you come into my inbox or add you own thoughts to the comments or reblogs that you do so kindly#עם ישראל חי#my people deserve to live#(yisreal not being Israel but being the Jewish people)#(yisrael was another name for the third forefather yaakov/Jacob)#(so the proper translation is: the nation of Yaakov lives)
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Disabled people who want to and can work deserve to be able to access fair, good quality employment without discrimination.
Disabled people who are unable to work deserve to be able to afford to live a good quality life without facing discrimination
#Being able to access the job that I love has been a game changer for my quality of life#And I think other people have the right to access that too#But I don't think employment is safe or right for everyone#And those people also deserve to live good lives
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Do you ever start thinking about the fact that Dazai literally made tiny snowmen based on his favourite people? The ones he secretly keeps in his heart?
Said people being:
- ANGO
- ODASAKU
- ATSUSHI
- CHUUYA
AND I BELIEVE IT'S BEAUTIFUL
#bsd#dazai osamu#ango sakaguchi#oda sakunosuke#odasaku#lupin trio#atsushi nakajima#chuuya nakahara#soukoku#dazai still has a heart#dazai's favourite people#dazai dislikes canonically chuuya but he is included?#stop lying dazai#we know who you are#yeah i noticed Akutagawa is not there#my poor baby aku deserves a better father#Akutagawa deserves better#atsushi and dazai's bond makes me weak#lupin trio makes me weak#lupin trio lives on#be gay do crimes
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one of the things that's the most fucking frustrating for me about arguing with climate change deniers is the sheer fucking scope of how much it matters. sweating in my father's car, thinking about how it's the "hottest summer so far," every summer. and there's this deep, roiling rage that comes over me, every time.
the stakes are wrong, is the thing. that's part of what makes it not an actual debate: the other side isn't coming to the table with anything to fucking lose.
like okay. i am obviously pro gun control. but there is a basic human part of me that can understand and empathize with someone who says, "i'm worried that would lead to the law-abiding citizens being punished while criminals now essentially have a superpower." i don't agree, but i can tell the stakes for them are also very high.
but let's say the science is wrong and i'm wrong and the visible reality is wrong and every climate disaster refugee is wrong. let's say you're right, humans aren't causing it or it's not happening or whatever else. let's just say that, for fun.
so we spend hundreds of millions of dollars making the earth cleaner, and then it turns out we didn't need to do that. oops! we cleaned the earth. our children grow up with skies full of more butterflies and bees. lawns are taken over with rich local biodiversity. we don't cry over our electric bills anymore. and, if you're staunchly capitalist and i need to speak ROI with you - we've created so many jobs in developing sectors and we have exciting new investment opportunities.
i am reminded of kodak, and how they did not make "the switch" to digital photography; how within 20 years kodak was no longer a household brand. do we, as a nation, feel comfortable watching as the world makes "the switch" while we ride the laurels of oil? this boggles me. i have heard so much propaganda about how america cannot "fall behind" other countries, but in this crucial sector - the one that could actually influence our own monopolies - suddenly we turn the other cheek. but maybe you're right! maybe it will collapse like just another silicone valley dream. but isn't that the crux of capitalism? that some economies will peter out eventually?
but let's say you're right, and i'm wrong, and we stopped fracking for no good reason. that they re-seed quarries. that we tear down unused corporate-owned buildings or at least repurpose them for communities. that we make an effort, and that effort doesn't really help. what happens then? what are the stakes. what have we lost, and what have we gained?
sometimes we take our cars through a car wash and then later, it rains. "oh," we laugh to ourselves. we gripe about it over coffee with our coworkers. what a shame! but we are also aware: the car is cleaner. is that what you are worried about? that you'll make the effort but things will resolve naturally? that it will just be "a waste"?
and what i'm right. what if we're already seeing people lose their houses and their lives. what if it is happening everywhere, not just in coastal towns or equatorial countries you don't care about. what if i'm right and you're wrong but you're yelling and rich and powerful. so we ignore all of the bellwethers and all of the indicators and all of the sirens. what if we say - well, if it happens, it's fate.
nevermind. you wouldn't even wear a mask, anyway. i know what happens when you see disaster. you think the disaster will flinch if you just shout louder. that you can toss enough lives into the storm for the storm to recognize your sacrifice and balk. you argue because it feels good to stand up against "the liberals" even when the situation should not be political. you are busy crying for jesus with a bullhorn while i am trying to usher people into a shelter. you've already locked the doors, even on the church.
the stakes are skewed. you think this is some intellectual "debate" to win, some funny banter. you fuel up your huge unmuddied truck and say suck it to every citizen of that shitbird state california. serves them right for voting blue!
and the rest of us are terrified of the entire fucking environment collapsing.
#spilled ink#writeblr#i hope it is clear here that i actually very much care about equatorial countries#and that's part of what makes me so angry bc im like. climate refugees exist.#they've existed for a while!!!#and the reply is almost always ''should have thought about that before living on an island"#like fuck dude. do you need to like how people vote before ur like#your entire house shouldn't burn down each summer????#so many of these people make it their life to mock california that they think it's FUNNY#and im like. girl you should be fucking trembling. TEXAS??? ARE YOU LISTENING??#this is one of those times that like. i need to stress how fucking stupid it would be#to let trump win. bc he could have “reached across the aisle.” covid could have been#a MASSIVE commercial success. he has such a huge and bigoted and brainwashed following.#literally just a PR campaign called COWBOY UP and it's pictures of cowboys in bandanas#trump reinvisioned as the lone ranger fighting for the american people against covid. EASY SELL#and instead. companies bought him. it became political. it was not ''oh shit this is 1 enemy let's all be human''#it was ''you deserve to die.''#climate change should be GLOBAL. it should be like ''yeah i hate u but. we do all live here''#i don't have to LIKE my group members to do well on a team project bc we are ALL getting graded.#is that simple enough of an under-explaination lol
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#art#fat positivity#body positivity#positivity#birblr#canary#doodle#Sorry I'm a bit all over the place at the moment guys#Had to spend time with my partner's fatphobic family#And I know I'm a thin guy so I am not like directly hurt by the things they believe#But it still was just an awful experience and I'm still kinda feeling that#And it infuriates me that me standing up for what's right is always framed as me being a delicate sensitive anorexic#You should treat fat people nice because they are people and deserve basic decency#I am not being overly sensitive by not wanting to hear your fatphobic crap#You're just not nice people#/rant over#Sorry for my little outburst guys! I am usually an easy going guy#I just get really riled up about this stuff#Fat people are wonderful and it is such a blessing to live in a world with such a huge range of different bodies!
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i'm just saying, they're all disney and this boy could use a princess emotional support group
#newsies#livesies#newsies broadway#jack kelly#disney princesses#this is just pure silliness but also i will defend this boys dreams with my life#he deserves to go to santa fe#to live the life he dreamed of#and have people SUPPORT HIM#he wants a new start and freedom and i think he deserves it
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Posting this before I forget.
(Plus these shitty first attempts)
#drawing#fanart#gravity falls#stanford pines#stanley pines#something something something#about Ford's passions problems and talent all isolating him#and him not always being aware of that#something else about Stan always chasing after him#but not being able to keep up#something about Ford thinking he isn't meant to be with other people#and Stan being taught that he doesn't deserve other people#so they only have eachother#but they're living in separate worlds#and Stan wasn't always welcome in Fords#and they hurt my feelings#and made me draw them#and distracted me from my anime drawings#and I hate them#please don't look at the water#please
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I find the fact that the confrontation at the end of UTRH is often summarized as Jason asking Bruce to kill the Joker for him fascinating.
Because that's not what happened.
Jason holds a gun up to Joker's head, gives Bruce another, and tells him that if Bruce doesn't do something (shoot Jason), he will kill Joker.
Jason doesn't give the gun to Bruce so that he would shoot Joker. He isn't expecting Bruce to pull the trigger on the clown. He's asking Bruce to do nothing. To be inactive. Because that will still be a choice, and despite having done nothing, everybody clearly agrees that Bruce would still, at least in part, be responsible for Joker's death.
...And to me, this moment is a kind of- microcosm, of the rest of Jason's point. Because after being captured and carted off to Arkham, the villain will escape again, and will kill more people. The only way to truly prevent that from happening would be to kill them; Bruce refuses to do so, and I respect his right to choose such a thing for himself, but it is still a choice, and if we agree that Bruce's inaction during the confrontation would leave him at least partly responsible for the Joker's death, then we must also agree that his inaction in permanently preventing the Rogues from killing more people means he is also, partly, responsible for all of those deaths.
#my dc posting#batman#dc#bruce wayne#jason todd#joker#uhh is this like analysis or meta#anyway. to me this is the message that scene sends#if we say bruce doing nothing would mean he assisted in the murder of joker then bruce doing nothing about the villains means he is also#responsible for those deaths#ANYWAY yes b4 you come at me;;#bruce's belief in rehabilitation and that everyone can get better is central to his character#and i love it and no i dont actually think he should kill the rogues or whatever#but the question there is. Are you fine with the future victims your decisions will cause?#Are their lives worth the slim chance any of these people will get better?#batman says yes theyre worth it. red hood says no theyre not.#thats the fundamental moral difference there#its why jason challenges the batman status quo#which is why he cant be harnessed well after his initial return bc comics can never truly escape that status quo#anyway i sure am having some thoughts for someone not that smart so if you disagree please tell me!!! just be civil or ill just block you <#...anyway this is another thing BTAS succeeds in bc i always feel like yes these villains do deserve yet another chance#despite what theyve done. bruce's belief in them doesnt feel stupid and naive#its abt what you yourself can live with. bruce can live w the deaths of the ppl the criminals he doesnt get rid of kill#and jason can live with killing those criminals and preventing further victims
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i’m very biased but people acting like atsushi is somehow a bland or unimpressive mc will always be crazy to me because he’s just??? so fucking excellent. i will never get over the way he subverts the classic good guy protagonist trope. his morals being guided not by what society deems right and wrong but by what makes him feel like a good person, and even that can be overridden by his natural inclination to prioritize himself. and we see this from the first chapter. like. hi, my name is atsushi. i love chazuke. i’m going to attack and rob the next person i see, because i’m so hungry. i saved a man from drowning in the river, why isn’t he thanking me? i’ll join his heroic organization even though i don’t want to, because it’s the only way to keep a roof over my head. my two favorite people are ex-mafia members who’ve taken countless lives. my least favorite person is also a mafia member who’s taken countless lives, but it’s different because he’s an asshole to me and my friends. i need kyouka to stay safe, because i care about her, but also because she’s proof that i can help people and that i’m good. today i found out that i killed someone when i was younger, but what did he expect? he hurt me. he deserved it. the man who abused me in childhood died too. he was hit by a truck. it doesn’t matter what his intentions were, because he hurt me. he deserved it. why can’t i stop crying?
#posts you make after you see a tweet. anyway. atsushi you will always be my favorite#this is also why i think him and dazai are such a great matchup#here’s a guy who needs to save people to reassure himself that he deserves to live#one of the most important people to him is a man he’ll never truly be able to save and who will never really be grateful if he does#bsd#atsushi
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sometimes i’m sooooo blown away by the fact that kevin is so smart……. like yes he is the fox with the highest grades despite being also the fox with the tightest training schedule and yes he canonically gets called an obsessive genius and yes the extra content explicitly says he is both very smart and very willing to teach people. but really i am thinking about kevin playing reporters like fiddles, jean calling kevin too good of a liar to ever let anything slip, kevin going up to andrew post-game and wordlessly helping cover up the fact andrew is off his medicine by pretending andrew’s racquet had broken (and then proceeding to discreetly crush it in his hand when the foxes gather around andrew), kevin living a lifetime of walking on the edge of riko’s knife, kevin hiding french, hiding thea, kevin spotting potential from a mile away, kevin who even riko thought was brilliant and sharp-tongued. yeah……..!
#hes really one of the smartest aftg characters my sister deserves some credit#book smart and media smart#he could start a cult if he wanted to but he doesnt he just wants to play exy#its actually really really really cool to me that kevin is smart but his motives are so simple#he wants to live. he wants to play exy. he wants jean to be happy. he wants andrew to enjoy exy. he wants neil to live#yeah he could use all those smarts for evil but he doesnt want to he wants to use them for fun and for texting thea and for exy#i dont know if my point is getting across here but i just i really like him………….. kevin is so simple minded and yet so smart#he wants a world of people falling over each other like puppies and if he didnt we would be fucked but he does#kevin is really the first healthy manipulative girlfriend#kevin#txt
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no, girl im fine— I’m just crying over the gospel again
#GOD CHOSE TO SEND HIS SON TO SAVE AN UNWORTHY PEOPLE#JESUS CHRIST — GOD THE SON — CAME DOWN AND LIVED AMONGST AN EVIL HUMANITY#HE LIVED THE LIFE WE CAN’T#HE DIED THE DEATH WE DESERVE#HE BECAME OUR SIN FOR US#HE BORE THE WRATH THAT IS OURS#HE IS ALIVE#GOD THE FATHER LOVES US WITH THE SAME LOVE HE LOVES THE SON#JESUS SENT GOD THE HOLY SPIRIT TO INDWELL AND BE WITH US#WHEN HE COMES BACK GOD WILL LOOK AT ME AND MY EVIL THAT PUT JESUS ON THE CROSS#AND HE WILL SEE CHRIST’S OBEDIENCE#HE WILL SEE HIS SON’S RIGHTOUSNESS#THERE IS NOTHING ON EARTH OR IN HEAVEN THAT CAN CHANGE THAT#GOD SWORE BY HIS OWN NAME THAT HE WOULD SAVE A PEOPLE THAT HE DETERMINED BEFORE THE FOUNDATION OF THE WOLRD#NONE THAT THE FATHER GAVE TO CHRIST WILL HE LOSE#WE WILL DWELL WITH CHRIST FOR ETERNITY BECAUSE HE CHOSE US AND BOUGHT US AND CLOTHED US IN HIS RIGHTOUSNESS WHILE WE WERE STILL GOD HATERS#SOLI DEO GLORIA#gospel#reformed theology#theology#g.txt
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I think it would really benefit people to internalize that mental illnesses are often chronic and not acute. Some of us will never be able to jump the hurdle of managing illness, much less sustaining a sense of normalcy. Many of us will never "recover," will never manage symptoms, will never even come close to appearing normal - and this is for any condition, even the ones labeled as "simple" disorders or "easy-to-manage" disorders.
It isn't a failure if you cannot manage your symptoms. It isn't a moral failure, and you aren't an awful person. You are human. There's only so much you can do before recognizing that you cannot lift the world. Give yourself the space to be ill because, functionally, you are.
#mental health#mental health advocacy#like... anxiety and depression are often concieved of as simple and easy to manage...#...but that isn't the case for so many of us. anxiety and depression just have a lot more research invested into them...#...and while i wish this were the case for literally every other condition it does alter people's perception of you to some extent...#...so while this is NOT solely about anxiety or depression it includes us...#...my anxiety and depression and PTSD have *destroyed* my life. this is chronic and will probably be life-long...#...and that isn't my fault. i've done the fucking work but guess what? that doesn't account for the fact that I Am Just ILL#the least we can do for each other is to be compassionate#be compassionate to those who cannot heal. be compassionate to the people who can't manage their lives. this world is scary enough#recognize that management of symptoms is something not all of us can do - even IF their condition is labeled as 'easy to manage'#i allowed myself to feel angry that i can't heal 'normally' and that was unfair as fuck toward myself#and i NEED people to internalize this so that MAYBE this could help somebody else who is where i was#i NEED them to understand that it's okay that they are where they are - sometimes shit just doesn't turn out how you expect or want#don't beat yourself over you being a person. you are struggling enough. you deserve to rest. just rest please#and just... give yourself space
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Fuck anyone who makes jokes about a crash that literally sent a driver to hospital.
Max's crash at Silverstone is the third most severe crash we've had in F1 in the past five years (most severe being Grosjean's in Bahrain 2020, followed by Zhou's in Silverstone 2022).
Additionally, the fact he was sent to the hospital at all is significant as Silverstone has its own medical facility on the grounds. It says everything that even as a precautionary measure, Max (+ Alex & Zhou the following year) was sent to the nearest hospital instead.
Do not for a single second take a driver walking away from a severe crash for granted. Sometimes, the miracles don't happen. Sometimes, a driver doesn't walk away unscathed. You do not want to be watching when the worst-case scenario becomes a real possibility, or worse; a reality.
If the like from Lando's dad is real... I have nothing else to say, from the bottom of my heart; FUCK YOU!
#f1#formula 1#formula one#max verstappen#fuck sky sports#if that like is real i don't have the fucking words#the sheer fucking privilege#the bitch slap he deserves my god if its real#there's so many people who have lost someone in a crash who would do anything for it to be just a joke#just something for a bit or meme or some shit#so their loved one could come home so their loved one would be alive#like ffs your son walked away from his worst crash which was at spa#there's at least 50 families who weren't so lucky at that track#I'm probably going to delete this later because I'm getting angrier and more upset#but its because i lived the other end i didn't get a miracle#we'll leave it at that
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Wake up, new cryptid just dropped!
It’s true that I’ve had to reimagine my day to day life since we got her, but I can’t imagine how we got this lucky. We thought we would have to work to earn her love, but from the moment she entered our house it’s been a cuddlefest, one I couldn’t possibly deny. There are hurdles she will be facing to be sure (and she will still need to meet the cats face to face) but I’m so happy to see this happy lil cheese every day. Welcome home Raclette!
(The couches will always be hers, even if it means she does try to smush whatever I’m working on at the time!)
#Raclette#I have returned to dog after the longest of absences#despite being surrendered twice she is still so eager to love#and so ridiculously gentle and behaved#her animal manners will need work but it was noted she did live with cats#she’s starting to ignore when they make noises in the other room which is great!#seeing as she’s a pit bull mix I will need to train her as best I can since people will not forgive#she has separation anxiety of course and is anxious on car rides and needs a refresher on basic training#but she has been such a gentle house guest#and she was wonderful when we had visitors#I wanna do right by her she deserves it#poor girl had pneumonia and has allergies#she’s doing well currently#she’s my dog but J loves her just as much as I do#she’s taught me so much in just one week#sorry I’m rambling I just love her so much
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you were raised in comparison.
it wasn't always obvious (well. except for the times that it was), but you internalized it young. you had to eat what you didn't like, other people are going hungry, and you should be grateful. you had to suck it up and walk on the twisted ankle, it wasn't broken, you were just being a baby. you were never actually suffering, people obviously had it worse than you did.
you had a roof over your head - imagine! with the way you behaved, with how you talked back to your parents? you're lucky they didn't kick you out on your ass. they had friends who had to deal with that. hell, you have friends who had to deal with that. and how dare you imply your father isn't there for you - just because he doesn't ever actually talk to you and just because he's completely emotionally checked out of your life doesn't mean you're not fucking lucky. think about your cousins, who don't even get to speak to their dad. so what if yours has a mean streak; is aggressive and rude. at least you have a father to be rude to you.
you really think you're hurting? you were raised in a home! you had access to clean water! you never so much as came close to experiencing a real problem. sure, okay. you have this "mental illness" thing, but teenagers are always depressed, right. it's a phase, you'll move on with your life.
what do you mean you feel burnt out at work. what do you mean you mean you never "formed healthy coping mechanisms?" we raised you better than that. you were supposed to just shoulder through things. to hold yourself to high expectations. "burning out" is for people with real jobs and real stress. burnout is for people who have sick kids and people who have high-paying jobs and people who are actually experiencing something difficult. recently you almost cried because you couldn't find your fucking car keys. you just have lost your sense of gratitude, and honestly, we're kind of hurt. we tell you we love you, isn't that enough? if you want us to stick around, you need to be better about proving it. you need to shut up about how your mental health is ruined.
it could be worse! what if you were actually experiencing executive dysfunction. if you were really actually sick, would you even be able to look at things on the internet about it? you just spend too much time on webMD. you just like to freak yourself out and feel like you belong to something. you just like playing the victim. this is always how you have been - you've always been so fucking dramatic. you have no idea how good you have it - you're too fucking sensitive.
you were like, maybe too good of a kid. unwilling to make a real fuss. and the whole time - the little points, the little validations - they went unnoticed. it isn't that you were looking for love, specifically - more like you'd just wanted any one person to actually listen. that was all you'd really need. you just needed to be witnessed. it wasn't that you couldn't withstand the burden, but you did want to know that anyone was watching. these days, you are so accustomed to the idea of comparison - you don't even think you belong in your own communities. someone always fits better than you do. you're always the outlier. they made these places safe, and then you go in, and you are just not... quite the same way that would actually-fit.
you watch the little white ocean of your numbness lap at your ankles. the tide has been coming in for a while, you need to do something about it. what you want to do is take a nap. what you want to do is develop some kind of time machine - it's not like you want your life to stop, not completely, but it would really nice if you could just get everything to freeze, just for a little while, just until you're finished resting. but at least you're not the worst you've been. at least you have anything. you're so fucking lucky. do you have any concept of the amount of global suffering?
a little ant dies at the side of your kitchen sink. you look at its strange chitinous body and think - if you could just somehow convince yourself it is enough, it will finally be enough and you can be happy. no changes will have to be made. you just need to remember what you could lose. what is still precious to you.
you can't stop staring at the ant. you could be an ant instead of a person, that is how lucky you are. it's just - you didn't know the name of the ant, did you. it's just - ants spend their whole life working, and never complain. never pull the car over to weep.
it's just - when it died, it curled up into a tight little ball.
something kind of uncomfortable: you do that when you sleep.
#writeblr#warm up#my dad was actively doing bad shit to us and we STILL were told we were lucky . and to a point i do think im lucky#i just think also there's somethin to be said about like. how about we stop using comparison to dismiss ppls individual struggles#yes there are people who have no perspective. for the reference tho having perspective actually made me really unwilling to get help#for what was a serious and debilitating mental health issue. bc i thought i didnt DESERVE IT#and i would rather have 600 ppl who aren't THAT bad get help and get heard and get seen#than make any 1 kid. do the math that i did: look at the world that is dying and the people who are hurting and say#''oh. okay. others have it worse. they are probably better people than i am. i am being unreasonable. i cannot ask for help#i am not good. i am taking too much space. i am not worth saving.''#bc our WHOLE lives we are taught a scarcity mindset - that you can 'steal' from someone. so that instead of changing a system that doesn't#actually offer fair support to everyone#we put the impetus on the individual to just... demand less.#and here's something - there are probably ppl who think i DIDNT deserve to get help#bc i DID have it better than other people#and something about that is ... so sickening. bc i think all of us in some way at some point WILL need help.#we were supposed to make communities. we were supposed to offer our hands. we were supposed to raise the barn#instead we said: it could be worse. now handle it yourself
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the mighty nein - critical role
this is a place where i don't feel alone. this is a place where i feel at home.
#also with softer vibes. i offer They#every silly little brainheart found family deserves a to build a home edit#the mighty nein maybe most of all. thats my family#also the lyrics deliciously well suited to m9.#when jester pulls that. stupid tarot card for fjord. home or traveler. and there's a carnival wagon. and veth says Thats Us! . them#i just think about . the tower is their home the xhorhouse is their home the lavish chateau is their home the balleater. the mistake.#the nein heroez. veth and yezas apartment. the dome. fjord and jesters living room floor.#a bar with a silly name on rumblecusp#also like. the song has stone and dust imagery. gardens and trees.#the inherent temporality of life and love and how that holds no bearing on how greatly people can love. im losin it okay.#ive been making this edit for days straight with my computer screaming at me for trying to shove 143 episodes of cr into a 2min20sec video.#crying becuase. theyre a family do you get it. they were nine lonely people and most of them had given up on seeing their own lives#as something that might be good. something that might make the world a better place. and in the end they're heroes.#and it doesn't matter if no one else knows because They know they're heroes. and they wouldn't've believed that was true when they met.#rattling the bars of my enclosure. to be loved is to be changed#posted on twitter and want to get in the habit of posting here too bc.#general reasons but also bc . i have noticed some of the ppl liking/sharing it are also ppl who shit on my ops by vaguing about my posts#which is in general whatever but does leave a funny taste in my mouth.#critical role#the mighty nein#cr2#caleb widogast#caduceus clay#jester lavorre#fjord#veth brenatto#yasha nydoorin#beauregard lionett#mollymauk tealeaf#my posts
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