#my money is on yes absolutely 100%
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spn2006 · 1 year ago
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do you think jared & jensen ever had a threesome with someone
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queerofthedagger · 1 year ago
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maybe that's just me being me but i think it's..... interesting, how much criticism/accusations/et al of the OTW recently is coming up so conveniently in that period between donation drive and election, argues so utterly in bad faith, and employs such a strong 'us vs them' rhetoric that is frankly baffling if it is actually coming from people who 1. have a basic understanding of the OTW's flat hierarchies and what that means for the workings of such a big org, and 2. have the orgs best interest and future in mind. none of this is to say that the OTW doesn't have its issues or room to improve, but you'd think that amidst the quick rise of fascism, purity culture, and their calls for censorship, people would take care not to present the bandwagon to those people on a silver platter, and also maybe........ bother 0.3 seconds to provide those annoying little shits called verifiable sources :))
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chaotictomtom · 11 months ago
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trying to check out to see if i'll ever manage to get top surgery this year and. let's just say i thought the delay would be bigger but. the price is still always such a big ass problem i kinda wanna bash my head against a wall but. anyway
#living with 600/month and having no idea if i'll ever get a job after this semi-work that ends in march but. oh well!!!#already tried to calculate if i could ever save any money from the little time i get to work there but!!! only make me wanna cry#im afraid this will be another year w/o top surgery 😀 dying in the summer and wishing to rip my skin off. w/o the hope i'll at least#get a date some day. cos at this rate i have absolutely no hope ngl.#the whole organisation to get to one of the potential surgeon 2h away is already making me want to explode#i have absolutely no idea how i'll ever be able to pull this off. ever. i don't even know if we'll be able to stay in this flat by the end#of our contracts. so. yeah#i can't see past 4 months away how can i think i'll ever be able to start this thing going. trying to but i stay silly ing the situation but#!!!!! im so desperate i feel so drained and exhausted. the mere idea of summer makes me wanna kms i'm dreading going through it another year#smh.#absolutely no one gives a shit i shouldn't vent in da tags for the 1 day of the yea#but im suddenly hit with an enormous wave of despair that i know won't go away cos it's always on my mind#and seeing the facts once again that i'll prob never be able to afford it is not helpiiiinh#yes i live in france no not everything is paid by healthcare cos it's still considered as non vital </3333#dental/ear/teeth problems started to get fully refundable (on specific little things) only a few years ago#so we're like decades of getting top surgery refunded 100% im afraid</3#i shouldn't complain but then again what's the use of cool healthcare if we can't ever have access to a doctor. of any kind.#smh smh smh#rent over I'm sick of myself i'll shut up sorry
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bpfandomcollective · 2 years ago
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On a whim today I bought a ps5 just so I don’t have to wait a second longer to play Horizon: Burning Shores.
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maikaartwork · 1 year ago
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Artists, let’s talk about Instagram commission scammers
There’s been a huge rise in commission scammers recently, mostly on Instagram. A lot of new artists don’t know what to look out for, so I figured this might help people.
How they begin
Usually the scammer will write to you asking about a commission. Something deceptively cute - mostly I encounter asks about pet portraits, with one or two photos sent. They’ll probably try to sell you a sweet little story, like “It’s for my son’s birthday”. They will insist that they love your artwork and style, even though they don’t follow you or never liked a single piece of your art.
What to look out for:
Their profiles will either be private, empty, or filled with very generic stuff, dating at most a few years back.
Their language will be very simple, rushed or downright bad. They might use weird emojis that nobody ever uses. They will probably send impatient “??” when you don’t answer immediately. They’re in a crunch - lots of people to scam, you know. 
They’ll give you absolutely no guidelines. No hints on style, contents aside from (usually) the pet and often a name written on the artwork, no theme. Anything you draw will be perfect. Full artistic freedom. In reality they don’t really care for this part.
They’ll offer you a ridiculous amount of money. Usually 100 or 300 USD (EDIT: I know it might not be a lot for some work. What I mean here - way higher than your asking price, 100 and 300 are standard rates they give). They’ll often put in a phrase like “I am willing to compensate you financially” and “I want the best you can draw”, peppered with vague praise. It will most likely sound way too good to be true. That’s because it is.
Where the scam actually happens
If you agree, they will ask you for a payment method. They’ll try to get to this part as soon as possible. 
Usually, they’ll insist on PayPal. And not just any PayPal. They’ll always insist on sending you a transfer immediately. None of that PayPal Invoice stuff (although some do have methods for that, too). They’ll really, REALLY want to get your PayPal email address and name for the transfer - that’s what they’re after. If you insist on any other method, they’ll just circle back to the transfer “for easiest method”. If you do provide them with the info, most likely you’ll soon get a scam email. It most likely be a message with a link that will ultimately lead to bleeding you dry. Never, and I mean NEVER click on any emails or links you get from them. It’s like with any other scam emails you can ever get.
A few things can happen here:
They overpay you and ask for the difference to be wired back. Usually it will go to a different account and you’ll never see that money again. 
They’ll overpay you “for shipping costs” and ask you to forward the difference to their shipping company. Just like before, you’ll never see that money again.
The actual owner of the account (yes, they most likely use stolen accounts to wire from) will realize there’s been something sketchy going on and request a refund via official channels. Your account will be charged with fees and/or you get in trouble for fraudulent transactions. 
You will transfer the money from your PayPal credit to your bank account and they will make a shitstorm when they want their money back, making your life a living hell. They will call you a scammer, a thief, make wild claims, wearing you down and forcing you into wiring money “back” - aka to their final destination account. 
Never, EVER wire money to anyone. This is not how it’s supposed to go. Use PayPal Invoice for secure exchanges where the client needs to provide you with their email, not the other way around.
You can find more info on that method HERE.
What to do when you encounter a scammer:
Ask the right questions: inquire about the style, which artwork of yours they like, as much details as you can. They won’t supply you with any good answers.
Don’t let the rush of the exchange, their praise and the promise of insanely good money to get to you. That’s how they operate, that’s how they make you lose vigilance. 
Don’t engage them. As soon as you realize it might be a scam, block them. The sense of urgency they create with their rushed exchange, and pressure they put on you will sooner or later get to you and you might do something that you’ll regret later.
Never wire money to anyone. Never give out your personal data. Never provide your email, name, address or credit card info. 
Don’t be deceived by receiving a payment, if you somehow agree to go along with it. Just because it’s there now doesn’t mean it can’t be withdrawn. 
Here is a very standard example of such an exchange. I realized it’s a scam pretty fast and went along with it, because I wanted good screenshots for you guys, so I tried going very “by the book” with it. 
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Please share this post, make it reach as many artists as possible. Let young or inexperienced artists know that this is going on. So many people have no idea that this is a thing. Let’s help each other out. If you think I missed any relevant info, do add it as an rb!
Also, if you know other scam methods that you think should be shared, consider rb-ing this post with them below. Having a master post of scam protection would AWESOME to have in the art community.
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suhkusa · 4 months ago
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THE KISS BET.
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PAIRING. Bakugou Katsuki x f!Reader
SUMMARY. Your friends bet you to kiss Katsuki Bakugou. Fortunately for you, they’re offering you $500 for it. Unfortunately for you, the two of you absolutely hate each other.
CW. third year, angst to fluff, light hurt/comfort, enemies to lovers, mature humor, feelings, language
WC. ~2.8k
A/N. enjoy :3
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You and your group of friends had a running gig. Bets. 
The group would bet one person to do something, on a scale from normal to outrageous, and that person’s turn wouldn’t end until they complete that bet. Of course, depending on how crazy the bet is, everyone would put in some amount of money. 
The most you’d gotten was $100 total from accepting a date from creep in the business class. Worst date of your life, but Jirou felt bad so she gave you an extra $50. 
As the lot of you gather around the campfire, everyone offers up their money to Mina who had just done her bet to put laxatives in Kirishima’s drink. There were a lot of questions about the morality of it, but you ignored it and gave her a crisp $20. 
“Y/N~ it’s your turn!” Ochako gleed. 
You roll your eyes, “I feel like I just did my other bet, which by the way was shit,” the girls laugh at your words. “I feel like all of you get the easier ones,”
“Easy? I had to kiss Monoma, do you know how hard that was? He knows I’m lesbian so imagine how hard that was for me to convince him,” Yaoyorozu sighs with a palm to her face.
“Oh, whatever,” Mina says with a clap of her hands, “You want a hard one, Y/N?”
“I mean that’s the whole point of paying each other to do bets, they’re supposed to be hard,” 
“Be careful what you wish for,” Mina smirks before standing up and pointing at you. 
“I bet you $100,” your ears perk up.
“-to kiss–,” your eyes widen but listen nonetheless.
“Katsuki Bakugou,” your world falls apart.
“Mina, no,” 
“Y/N, yes,” she jumps up and down, “It’s too late, I already said it,”
All the other girls are hooting and hollering, but you just sit there in silence as you stare at the flames. Are you really going to try this?
As you consider your options the other girls start placing their bet offerings.
“$75 from me,” Tsuyu calls out.
Then from Hagakure, “$50,”
“$150,” from none other than Yaoyorozu. 
“I guess I’ll put in $80,” Jirou smiles at your misery.
“Hmm, I’ll even it out with $45, so $500 flat for you, Y/N,” Ochako smiles.
$500?!? You’d be outright stupid to deny such a big amount of money. But you’d even stupider to think Katsuki Bakugou would kiss you of all people. 
“I think that’s impossible,” you whine as the other girls poke fun at you.
“I guess only time will tell,” Mina grabs your hands and smiles, “Good luck, Y/N,”
You can hear the rambunctiousness of your class before you walk in. When you walk through the doors, your eyes scan the class before your eyes lock in on Katsuki Bakugou. You groan with a roll of your eyes before stomping your way towards him. 
“Hey, Katsuki,” you stare down at him, “You want to do me a favor,”
“For you? I rather eat shit,” he grumbles as he meets your gaze.
“You’re a freak,” you already knew this was going to be hard, “Please,”
“Mm, depends, what’s in it for me?” 
“I guess you’ll find out,” you say. “Kiss me,”
It feels like the class goes silent as the two of you continue to just stare at each other. He opens his mouth then closes it. 
“You– The fuck?” His eyes are scattering as the words continue to process through his mind, “What a weirdo, hell no,” then he’s pushing himself out of his seat and making his way to the door.
“You know class starts in 5 minutes right?” you call to him.
“Fuck off,” he grunts as he shuts the door behind him.
Yep, definitely hard. 
The next time you bother Bakugou for a kiss is when the two of you are paired up for combat training. Much against his will. 
“Katsuki~” you call out as you dodge another blow from him. “You can’t avoid me forever,”
“Yes-” another explosion, “I can,”
You go on the offense as you continue, “Just a peck, please. I’m a good kisser, I promise,” 
“You’re shit,” he’s grumbling between dodges of your attacks.
“Wouldn’t you like to know,” you send him a wink before getting a hit on him. 
Bakugou groans, about to send another remark, when the training ends with a blow of a whistle.
The two of you meet eyes one last time, “Think it over, kay?” you smile before walking away.
Knock, knock. 
You stand at Bakugou’s door.
“Go away, perv,”
“Aw, how did you know it was me? You missed me?”
“I can just tell by the stench,” 
You laugh a little at his words, “Please, let me explain to you and maybe you’ll reconsider,” 
You can hear footsteps, and you smile. When he opens the door he’s adorned in his classic black tank and some sweats.
“You should put some clothes on, perv,” you mock. “Anyways, it was a bet from my friends and there’s $500 on the line, so if you would just–”
“I don’t kiss just anyone, princess,” the nickname causes you to fluster, but you shake it off as he continues, “You gotta earn it,”
He’s got a stupid smirk on his face, and you didn’t even realize it but he’s definitely leaning closer to you. It’s sending butterflies– well maybe more like moths– into your stomach. 
“What the– You’re definitely the pervert. I’m just going to ask to call it off,” you fake gag, “Later, loser,” 
“You’ll be back, nerd,”
You internally groan as you hear him shut the door, ignoring the intense heartbeat in your chest.
“No,” Mina says.
“What?! I told you it’s impossible,” you argue, all of your friends on the other side of the argument. 
“No it’s not, he said you had to earn it right?” Mina retorts, “So obviously there’s a way, you’re just stubborn,”
“You’re really not asking me to… You guys are crazy. Please, please, I’ll take anyone else, anything else,” 
“Sorry, Y/N, it’s the rules,” Tsuyu looks at you with pity.
“He hates me and I hate him! That’s all there is to it. It’s not going to happen,”
“Why do you guys even hate each other? It’s our third year, get over it already,” Jirou teases. 
“Because he’s a dick and I refuse to let him walk all over me! I just cursed him out one time for calling me weak. He’s the one who holds grudges because of his fragile, little heart,” 
“You should’ve known he’d hold that against you, but I honestly doubt he hates you because of that,” Mina says. “He probably thought you looked hot,” she laughs.
Heat rushes to the tips of your eyes, “Whatever, all of you are weirdos. But anyways-”
“No, Y/N,” Mina states, end of subject.
“You all just want me to kill myself,” you groan as you sink into the couch. “Whatever, but I’m going to force all of you to double your offering if I actually do this shit,”
The girls cheer. You cry inside. Anything for money, you guess.
It seems like the universe heard about the predicament you were in, because it felt like you were suddenly around him more often ever since the bet had been set.
“You know, I don’t want to be on patrol with you either,” you grumble, kicking at rocks as the two of you walk up and down the roads of the dorms.
“Glad we agree,”
Silence washes over you both. 
“Why don’t you want to kiss me? Am I ugly or something?” you ask, but it definitely comes off sadder than you intend.
“Don’t get all insecure because you don’t get a stupid kiss,” he looks the opposite direction of yours, “You know damn well you’re not ugly, so don’t piss me off,” 
He had a strange way of saying stuff.
“Aw, you love me, don’t you?” you tease, poking at his arm.
“Ah you dumbass, pay attention,” you snap back into place with a laugh, “‘M just saying you’re better looking than some of these extras,” 
You don’t know what to say in response to his words. Because they were surprisingly very sweet. 
Realizing he had said too much, he changes the subject. “Let’s go this way,”
You follow him with a nod.
There was definitely a certain type of tension lingering that the two of you walked in near silence for the rest of the patrol. 
You definitely were not repeating back his words in your head over and over again for the rest of the patrol. And Katsuki Bakugou was definitely not turning red because of what he said earlier. Definitely not. 
After that patrol, things seemed to sort of shift between the two of you. And to say it was scary was an understatement. 
Conversations wouldn’t always start off with the two of you insulting or cursing each other out. There’d be a hey or hello. If you guys saw each other in passing, he’d greet you with a nod of his head. Him being anything but passive aggressive towards you was terrifying because it was so not him. 
“Y/N,” a familiar voice calls out to you, you groan as you put your pencil down.
“I’m studying, what do you want, Katsuki?” 
“Come with me to the movies after school today,” it’s not really a question, more like a command. 
You put your hands to your mouth in fake(?) excitement, “You’re asking me on a date?! So kind, Katsuki,” 
“It’s not a date, idiot. I’m going with Ei and Denki later, they’re bringing Jirou and Mina. They were teasing me for not bringing anyone, so come,”
“If I don’t?” you muse.
“Be there or be square, nerd,” he doesn’t take your bait, but you can tell he’d prefer it if you go. He walks away before you can respond. 
Well, you guess you have plans later.
;;;
You meet up with the lot of them at the allotted time. The group walks together, and you thank God your friends have a questionable taste in men so you wouldn’t be stuck with some randos. But you also have half a mind to curse them out for leaving you to fend for yourself when you all arrive at the theater. 
They left you with no choice but to sit with Bakugou. Part of you really hates it, but not as much as you hate the rate at which your heart beats. 
For the most part, the two of you just sit there in awkwardness. The other couples indulge in that lovey dovey shit, and it makes you feel out of place. You zone out and get into your head. Was there a motive in asking you to come out here? He could’ve invited like… Midoriya… or Ochako… Or anyone, really. But, you? Does he like you? Or were you his last option to invite? Your head hurts from overthinking.
Your hand rests in your lap, picking at the material of your pants. At least that’s what it was doing. Until it happened. 
From the corner of your eye, you watch as Bakugou slid his hand into yours. His fingers finding a comfortable place between your own. You release a deep breath when you realize you were holding your breath. Is he out of his fucking mind?
Despite your efforts to try and justify how much you absolutely hate it. You didn’t even try to stop him. You didn’t pull away. You didn’t let his hand go. And even as the movie ended, you actually felt sad when he slid his hand away. 
The cool air of the night shocked you a bit when all of you made it outside. 
“We were thinking of grabbing a bite, did you guys want to come?” Mina exclaims. 
“Ooh, that sounds good, are you down, Jirou?”
“Sure, and you guys?” they all look at you.
“I- I have a stomach ache… Butter fucks with my stomach really bad,” the excuse is kind of weak, but still holds up as they all nod in understanding. 
“I can walk you to the dorm,” Bakugou offers, and you don’t really give him a yes or no, he just follows you.
Kirishima and Mina whistle and holler as the two of you part ways with the rest of them. 
Part of you regrets making up some stupid lie to go home. Because this was way more awkward than getting free pizza. 
The two of you are right by each other as you walk in silence towards the dorm. You wait. And wait. Wait for him to bring it up. Why did he do that? Why did he grab your hand? Was it all a front?
Why is he treating you so well?
Even as he drops you off at your room, he says nothing. Just a simple “Goodnight,” before he’s making his way to the elevator.
What an asshole.
So you take the initiative. The initiative in ignoring him. You weren’t some casual fling. Fuck the bet, fuck him.
When you saw him making his way towards you, you were quick to get up and rush out of the classroom. When he nodded your directions in passing, it was easy to just walk past and not acknowledge him. Whatever there was between you and him, was gone. Whatever “it” was, exactly. 
But you were okay. You guess. You were down $500 or $1000, but whatever. That game was bullshit anyways. You always got the worst bets. You kind of felt bad that you were the end of it, though. 
It was easy to avoid him. That’s what you thought. At least until one week later, you found yourself cornered by your dorm room with nowhere to go.
“What the fuck is up with you?” he’s angry, you’d be stupid if you thought otherwise.
You cross your arms and avoid his intense gaze, “Whatever do you mean?” 
He’s getting closer, and a tiny, like miniscule, part of you finds angry-him hot. “You know what the hell I mean, you’ve been avoiding me,” 
“Nuh uh,” you retort, still avoiding the subject at hand. “I’ve just been busy, sorry,”
“Like hell, Racoon Eyes said you’ve been in your dorm room everyday, so try again, asshat,”
Fucking Mina.
“I don’t have to explain myself to you,” you poke at his chest, “Now get out of my way before I beat your ass,”
“Yeah? I’d like to see you try,” he’s smiling with mockery.
“Oh, I’m sure you’d like to be touched by me, you little virgin,” you inspect your nails in nonchalance, “Too bad, so sad, now move,”
“No, not until you answer me,” he’s a bit more serious now, you can sense it in his tone. 
You groan, “Fine, not until you answer me, though. Why the fuck did you hold my hand and act like it didn’t happen? Am I like a joke to you?”
He straightens up and his eyes widen. He looks to the side, then back at you.
“You’re fuckin’ smart, why don’t you take a guess?”
“You’re not a baby, why don’t you use your words?” 
You got him there.
“Maybe ‘cuz I like you, or something, idiot,”
You laugh. Laugh. Because he really thought you’d believe a stupid joke like that.
“You’re funny, but seriously, why did–”
A kiss. Katsuki Bakugou has always been known for his speed and his wit. But now you see it more than ever. As he steals a kiss from you. It happens faster than you’re able to even realize you’re leaning into it. 
When the two of you part, it’s tense again. You don’t know if you should say something but he takes that choice from you.
“You think that was funny?” he asks.
“Well- no, but–”
“No buts, that’s that,”
“I didn’t even say I like you back! What if I didn’t-”
“Oh, so you do?” you jump up in realization you fumbled your words. “Good to know, princess,”
“Ugh, you’re so annoying. How was I supposed to know you liked me? You’re such an asshole, you know?”
“Really? Because this asshole just got you some cash,” he laughs referring to the bet, “But y’know, I don’t let just anyone call me Katsuki,”
You grit your teeth before throwing a punch at his arm, “Annoying! Annoying, so annoying,” 
Another hearty laugh escapes from his lips as he pulls you into a hug. You didn’t even know Bakugou gave hugs. But you don’t mind it. 
“You’re such a pervert, I bet you’ve been looking forward to that kiss,” he teases.
“Yeah? Well you’re a pervert for even kissing me in the first place,”
YOU: pay up bitches
YOU: i’m talking double btw
[164 new notifications]
You were rich and in love. What more could you ask for?
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© all writings belongs to suhkusa 2024. do not repost or change.
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thatbitchery · 13 days ago
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FINANCE 102 (?). EVERYTHING I HAVE DONE TO MAKE THIS MUCH IN ONLY A YEAR IN PASSIVE INCOME
& this time I even brought receipts.
Apart from the not even subtle flex, this year has easily been one of my most successful financial years yet. When I say passive income we are not counting investment returns (that financial statement isn't out yet and does not matter, it's automatically reinvested. Not even for flexing purposes, there are a few things I need you to understand about me and these numbers:
First, none of this is salary. I work a medium wage job that pays in four figures monthly. It also does not include other income sources that require my involvement. Passive is the key term.
Second, apart from right at the start, I've had no personal involvement in any of these sources. None. Not even calls or texts or emails, fully automated.
Third, it is all tax free. It all belongs to me. One of them is after tax but the rest are 100% what I've made.
These are three completely different streams, and these are between November last year to date. One year.
No it's easy or simple or fast.
(sidenote) I take my financial statements in Nov and plan for the new year bc i don't count dec as even part of a productive year.
My passive income (including investments) is my largest source of income and will always be.
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(because I will always bring the receipts)
I am no financial guru so I can not directly give you financial education, but I can tell you what I do and if you get it, good for you.
Soo then, steps I've taken to be able to get to this financial position at 24 (I turn 25 next month btw;) ) from, well, since as far back as I can remember. It's a process.
-> First, Investing heavily in financial education. What has this looked like for me?
I've probably gone to 30+ finance seminars and workshops centered around investment, asset management and wealth distribution. I went to my first at 19 and last in March. If i have to pay I will. If i need to skip town, I will. I go, i listen, I ask questions, I make connections. I make a plan of what I want to learn and focus on that, not haphazardly consuming content as long as it's finance related.
Finance bros (is a gender-neutral term pls). It is a finance bro that told me to buy my first ecommerce business before covid hit. It was a finance bro that got me to buy the business that has made me the last screenshot for less that 10k. It was a finance bro that taught me to work low wage and make my bank in assets so I don't overpay in tax. It was my finance bros to teach me what to invest where and how to keep my banks offshore and to set up my trust fund (plus law girlies ofc mwah) and get my LLC. Finance bros save lives. I'm not good with money. I have people that are good with money.
-> Second, i tied up my loose ends early enough. Loose ends? Yes, the financial vampires that had no return on investment.
First is societal obligation aka giving back to the community. Wrapped that up in mentorship and volunteering (a lot because I'm not giving my money to people that have more than me that's wild.
Second- my family. Shout out and huge fat thank you to my extended family for being extremely sh!tty openly to me and my nuclear family when we were younger so absolutely no one faults me for cutting them off amen. For my nuclear family it is kind of obvious whoever is the most financially advanced provides for the family and that's fine if it means a set amount every month not calling me whenever you want some baby shower or whatever. Loose end. Set up investment accounts for each of them and invested monthly up from my third year of high school to second year of uni (Three- four years) while teaching them how to make money work for you then just- pulled back. No one can say I abandoned them and every four months if I want to instead of sending money home I send it to their accounts. Tied up that loose end bc they can reaally reallllly bankrupt you if you're not careful.
-> third, always focusing on the ROI and what is important to me. If it does not have a higher return on investment what do I even need it for? What does this mean?
It means befriending the kids at Fashion and textile faculty in uni and having them teach me how to work clothes and make up into my body and into achieving the lifestyle i want through them and then finding my ROI.
Having my eyeliner tattooed for <50$ in my home country so I don't need to buy eyeliner and reapply every ten minutes. It means getting my bags made for <50 each in my home country too instead of buying a high quality bag for God knows how much in my Country of residence.
It means buying stocks not bags and dresses because one appreciates and the other depreciates and dresses are not important to me.
It means perfecting my thrift game because i value quality, not price tags.
It means moving to a higher end area although rent is higher because the security, the gym, the people, the amenities, all things that are of value to me.
It means investing in things that I know will give me a high return in investment and using my money to buy value, not things. Before I even touch my money for purchase I am already calculating its value vs my value system vs return on investment.
-> Fourth, Building discipline. I have invested the MOST in this area. I can not even stress this enough - discipline is the highest value skill you can ever learn. According to google discipline is "the practice of training people to obey rules or a code of behavior, using punishment to correct disobedience". And that is exactly how I did it, used punishment to correct myself.First, deciding the rules and code of behavior I wanted to follow. Second, making myself follow it using the nacient learning method, reward and punishment- where reward is normalcy and punishment is just :).
In high school, running for double captainship because that would force me to work and work hard. The pressure of the expectations just one captainship demanded was hell, make that two plus having to keep my scholarship and yeah. One wrong move and I'd be stripped of them both, and that forced me to never make mistakes. And it was really, really hard to not make mistakes.
Knowing my ADHD brain has an extremely hard time being consistent, I learned pretty early I need external help to keep myself in check. Realized that help has to come from someone I respected after trying to make it work with friends and failing. My first mentor cost me a good 5000$ every month (not so high it would paralyze me but high enough i felt the pressure) and when I slipped up i owed them 500$ on the floor. Missed something on my to do list with no good excuse? 500$. Failed my exams? Ate junk? Bought something without considering the ROI? Did not reach my health goals ? 500$. On the spot. No stories no argument no nothing. You mess up six times and the seventh you just automatically cry even before you think of messing up because damn. Reward and punishment. After a while (One year to be exact) it gets so deeply programmed its part of my ADHD.
Accountability partners. Exclusive. High functioning. A pretty 1200$ every month but I don't mind, it's worth it. Extremely high ROI.
-> Heavily investing in myself because I will always give myself the highest ROI.
Blood checks every quarterly because my health is everything. (Chinese herbalists, extremely cheap).
Educating myself heavily in all the fields that are important to me. Communicaton. Languages (Learning my tenth if we count sign language as a language and eleventh if we count braille). Gut health (Filthily educated in this bad boy. PHD level). Psychology and human behavior. Using fashion, beauty and styling to work for me. Violin. Equestrian. Everything I like. Double bachelors and a weird number of accredited certifications.
Therapy. I'm no longer in therapy but this was probably the best thing I ever did. Worth every dime. Went through six therapists until i found my stoic reality-based gem that was not trying to make me feel better but get better and survive the world as is.
My social life and friendships. Not even for social climbing, more for having friends and building my community and tribe. I'm not a lone wolf or sigma I'm a social person that's also part of a social species. Pouring into my friendships and networks has had a super impressive ROI and has been worth the trouble.
My reputation and social / public image. Nothing I guard harder than this, not even my money. I am not an idgafer i will never be. A good name is better than riches. I actually care what people say about me and carefully manipulate them into saying what I want.
Skill amassing especially in areas in consider essential. Home keeping. Sewing. Personal finance. Health and nutrition. Social skills. IT. Music. &c &c.
(will probably add as I remember. will also probably delete there's something really cringy about bringing receipts)
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vintagegeekculture · 23 days ago
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I remember a friend of mine had some LPs that were Star Wars themed disco albums, and it brought back a very weird memory from back in the 70s (yes, I'm old!) of listening to a Star Wars disco mashup on the radio. What was all that about? I also remember something like that for Close Encounters, too.
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You remember correctly, and this went on for a long while. In 1983, disk jockeys around the country played a record that involved an Ewok rapping the plot of Return of the Jedi in Ewokese. This made it to #60 in the Billboard Top 100.
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This is hard to explain to people who weren’t there….but in the wake of Star Wars in the late 70s and early 80s, scifi was so beloved and mainstream that the orchestral music for nerdy scifi and fantasy movies about outer space were remixed and sampled into Giorgio Moroder-esque Italo-Disco dance numbers. And the most astonishing thing is, instead of being consigned to convention acts the way “horse famous” Brony dubstep acts are, this received national airplay on the radio, reached the pop music charts, and were played in discotheques. And incredibly, this continued for years and expanded from Star Wars into Star Trek, Wizard of Oz, Black Hole, Close Encounters….
All of this was the work of one specific person: Meco (or Dominico Monardo). The term “ahead of their time” is thrown around a lot, but Meco really was: a combination producer-songwriter and Italo-Disco pioneer in the style of Giorgio Moroder, he did several things that are now absolutely standard: he used remixes and sampling before hiphop made that standard for musicians, he wrote “fandom music” on a Moog synthesizer decades before Bronies turned their conventions into cringey dubstep concerts with songs like “Everypony Dance Now.”
It's stunning to me that Meco has not been rediscovered, considering every single trend in the culture essentially went his way.
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The most startling thing about Meco’s Star Wars disco album, the one that got the ball rolling on this trend, is this: I always assumed it was some kind of cash in created by a record label mandate, a label executive’s completely cynical choice to hop on a hot new trend. That isn’t a crazy thing to think at all, since Star Wars is and always has been the most merchandized and sold out scifi property ever. But it wasn’t! You see, it was all the product of a single man’s specific vision: Meco had to convince his record label to make the record because they were skeptical.
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When Meco went to see Star Wars in 1977 on Opening Day (what an experience that must have been) with his friend and fellow Italian chest hair/gold medallion enthusiast Tony Bongiovi, he was already an experienced producer-songwriter who had worked with Gloria Gaynor, Diana Ross, and formed DCA, the Disco Corporation of America. If you've ever listened to Diana Ross's "I'm Coming Out," Meco actually played the trombone solo in that song. Seeing the Star Wars movie for the first time, though Meco thought the movie was nothing short of a religious experience. Originally, he wanted to do Star Wars music as a b-side on a Gloria Gaynor album, but expanded the idea into an entire album.
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In Meco’s own words:
"When I think about what I did, nobody came to me, nobody said 'Meco, why don't you do this.' Nobody says 'Here's some money go make a record of this movie.' It was just my own... It was magical, it was just out of this world when all that happened."
Not only did this album hit platinum, not only did it actually outsell the Star Wars soundtrack, his remix of the Star Wars theme also went to #1 in the charts. It’s actually the best selling instrumental single of all time. A record, that, incidentally, it holds to this day.
Dick Clark, host of American Bandstand, had this to say about Meco:
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"In 1977, Meco Monardo accomplished something no one else has ever done to the best of my knowledge. He was the first one in history to out-sell the soundtrack of a motion picture with his own distinctive version of a film's music. The music was totally danceable, and broke new ground. It's no wonder the STAR WARS THEME went to # 1. I loved his treatment of music from THE WIZARD OF OZ. Again, Meco created something innovative. The fun and the excitement gave a whole new feel to that totally familiar and well-loved music."
Like a lot of studio producers, Meco had an insane work ethic and hit when the iron was hot: he did an album about Close Encounters that exact same year, but also did a Star Wars Christmas Album, one of the strangest pieces of Star Wars kitsch around.
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One of the most interesting things about the Star Wars Christmas album is that one of the songs, “R2D2’s Wish You a Merry Christmas” is the first professional vocals by John Bon Jovi, who was Meco’s friend Tony Bongiovi’s seventeen year old younger cousin (he was initially known as John Bongiovi). It's incredible to hear a squeaky voiced teen Bon Jovi on a kitsch album about a robot Christmas.
1978-1979 was really his best year. Meco made an Italo-Disco remix album entirely devoted to Superman, and at this point, Meco had the pull to get access to John Williams's sheet music for the score before the music even came out. In my personal opinion it's the best of them because he has to recreate it entirely with his own instruments, leading to a very unique sound.
He also did an album based on the Wizard of Oz:
And a combination album of Star Trek/Black Hole. It's probably the earliest remixing date of Goldsmith pieces of music: the Motion Picture Theme (which is now associated with the Next Generation - hearing it done in Italodisco is uncanny) and the Klingon Theme:
Incidentally, I think the design here of the Meco Enterprise, which had to be modified for legal reasons, would make a wonderful canon starship if anyone wants to be inspired by it. It reminds me of the same concept that would be used in the very next film for the Reliant-class of ships.
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Meco eventually retired from music in 1985, but unfortunately he is no longer with us, as he passed into the next dimension in 2023. I think he showed us that creativity is often about transformation, and was inspired to make his art by a legitimate awe of space, the cosmos, and human imagination that the scifi movies of the 1970s and 80s provoke.
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shytastemakerthing · 2 months ago
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Hey there! Maybe this is an odd request but I was wondering if you could do a list or maybe write a few characters of your choice on who would find piercings or body mods most attractive vs who wouldn't? For example I have my tongue and angel fangs done, dye my hair constantly, and I plan on getting a cherry blossom tattoo on my back. Would the Pomefiore house turn their nose at that?? Would it be against the rules at Heartslabyul? Or are there characters that you think would immediately crush on someone who looked like that? If not feel free to ignore, but I was just wondering if I could get your take on this!
A/N: The amount of ideas that I have for this should be criminal XD. But for the sake of not turning this into one massive essay, we'll just cover the basics for each boy. Enjoy!
TW: None
Note: Ortho is strictly PLATONIC
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Riddle: He isn't completely against piercings or tattoos, but given how he was raised, his mother certainly beat it into his head that such things were not okay and destroyed one's body. He's been working on that a bit. Certainly would like the single lobe piercings the most, especially if they were rose or flower themed. Tattoos? Yeah, that will take much more getting used to.
Trey: Look at this man and tell me he isn't into that. All he asks is that you take proper care of them. Will absolutely go with you to choose out more. He isn't fully opposed to tattoos, he just doesn't like that caused you pain throughout. But seeing the after makes it worth it
Cater: More of a piercings guy. Absolutely gets you more, whether it be from deals he gets, from his sisters, or he was scrolling and saw an add. Wants all the pictures. Not a fan of tattoos surprisingly. Would be more into the temporary ones or even henna
Ace: Heavily into both. Man looks at you and is fighting the heart eyes. There's just something so attractive about them that tickles his brain just right. If you were to get some kind of a small heart tattoo somewhere, much like the drawing he has under his eye, the ego boost would be insane.
Deuce: Slightly more into tattoos than the piercings. It's a serious thing, permanent in many cases, and it's a long and sometimes painful process. He admires the dedication. Often traces any that you have and 100% goes with you if you want to get another one
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Leona: The man has a tattoo. Certainly more of a tattoo guy. Not to say he doesn't like piercings, he just feels like they would easily get in the way or pulled that makes them a bother. Now, tattoos? You're speaking his language. The moment you mention you want a new one, he's taking you to where he has gotten his, only the best is what you get, willing to spend as much as needed. After all, if you want a good tattoo, you must be willing to pay. 1000% find tattoos attractive
Ruggie: Not the biggest on either tbh. Mostly because they cost so much money and as someone who grew up not having much of it, would rather keep what he has than spend it on these.
Jack: Not a tattoo guy. Piercings are hot or miss for him. Depends on what they are and where. He loves seeing little moon or wolf earrings on you, something simple
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Azul: Honestly, more of a tattoo guy. The permanence of them is what gets him. Being 100% positive that you want thing on your body for the rest of your life. Absolute game over if you get anything octopus related, he's ascended then and there. Man is so red, stumbling over his words, his brain shuts down. Absolutely traces it whenever it's just the two of you... yes, it has sometimes led to more.. heated moments
Jade: Absolutely a piercings guy. Doesn't matter where, he loves them and if you happen to get a set of moray eel ones or mushrooms for the ears, no one knows where both of you vanished too. Finds them more attractive than he would like to admit. Also goes with you if you want more
Floyd: It's about 50/50 for him, he likes both, leans more towards tattoos, though. Another tracer. Kisses them all of the time, gives little nibbles..... you got one of a moray (where is up to you), he's never been more attracted to you than in this moment. Also, no one knows where you guys went after that... he just wants... further examination
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Kalim: Honestly a tattoo guy. Another who will fund when you want more. What you want, you get, and can honestly go a bit overboard, but he just wants to make sure you are happy with what you have! Has more wholesome intentions than the rest when he traces them
Jamil: Not the biggest fan of either. More of a henna tattoo guy if you want them. Will absolutely do them himself, the man is a natural. Plus, it's an intimate moment for the both of you and he enjoys the atmosphere
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Vil: Surprisingly a piercing guy. He finds them attractive on you, especially when you pair them well with whatever you are wearing for the day. He can't explain it, but there is just something about a lip piercing that draws him in. His eyes are often drawn to your lips as it is anyways, the piercing isn't helping. If you have a tattoo somewhere hidden, that only he gets to see (may not be the biggest fan of them but knowing he is the only one to ever see it sends this man on a trip), sends a shudder down his spine
Rook: VERY much into both. Both send his brain in a million different directions. Traces them, kisses them, helps you change the piercings. intentions are not always the most pure, but that's the fun of it. Takes you for more, even recommends more bold piercings and offers options for tattoos
Epel: Piercing guy. More so, he just likes them. Likes how they look or would shine. Just more of a pleasant thing he likes to see. Gets you little apple studs to put in your ears.
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Idia: Honestly? He leans either way.But anything that relates to his interests or pomegranates (if you know, you know), and the man is a goner. Hair is entirely pink as he tries to avert his gaze. Funds more for you all of the time, he has the money for it and he loves to spoil you. Absolutely traces tattoos while you are asleep. If you're awake? Will absolutely lead to heated moments
Ortho: Helps you make sure that new tattoos and piercings are kept nice and clean! We can't have you getting any infections. He doesn't want anything happening to his best friend, after all! If you are looking for something new for your piercings, will have the best shops available with the best metals to use.
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Malleus: Surprisingly, a tattoo guy. If you get a dragon, he is gone.... and so are you. Congrats, you're married now. Just the thought that you are willing to sit there for hours under a needle piercing your skin brings a new sort of admiration. Starts with pure intentions, but instincts get the best of him
Lilia: Piercing guy all the way, he loves them. Recommends all different types and styles. Bats are the most common that he finds for you. Intentions are nowhere near being pure most of the time, knowing him. Especially with a lip or tongue piercing, kisses you all of the time
Silver: Surprisingly big into both of them. Again, it's the permanence of them, something that he loves. Like Epel, just enjoys the meaning they may have and how they would look on you.
Sebek: HEAR ME OUT! Big on both of them all of the way, especially piercings. Again, some of it is a dedication thing for him, but there is just something about a tongue piercing that riles him up a bit, most because the way that it feels during more intimate moments that you would both have with one another. Tattoos are a dedication that he admires all the way. You have one croc related and he is a goner
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Have a wonderful day/night!
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sculien · 24 days ago
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please help me save my dogs life.
my dog is suffering right now and i need to get him to the vet asap. his head has started wobbling, he has no balance and his eyes are...messed up. (he's also having a hard time opening his eyes) i know for a fact he has a severe flea allergy, and the house i'm staying at right now had no fleas until the neighbors moved in and we now have a literal infestation. (you can't walk thru this house or outside without having at least 10 fat fleas trying to body slam you) he was on meds for his allergies and was doing fine, but then i became homeless and was moving around too much to be able to work and keep him on it. so i'm pretty sure his immune system is overloaded with allergy attacks.
so i'm looking to raise at least $400, to cover the tests the vet would need to do + his medication. (the medication he absolutely needs is literally $100)
i'm also aware with him being 10 years old, the damage could be done and i might have to get him put down, which is about $200+ for his size.
i've attached a picture of him below under a read more with more info bc he looks a little scary and i don't wanna upset or freak anyone out.
i'm not doing a gofundme or anything similar bc i've heard horror stories of people not getting their money, and this is quite literally a life or death situation and with him being my soul dog, i can't take any chances.
any amount helps us out right now, and if you can't donate, please, please reblog. 💞 please feel free to send me a message if you have any questions about anything!
p.ypal: @/airikah v.nmo: itserij c.shapp: $itserij *my real name and online name are the same, just spelled differently. airi/eri and airikah/erica are all me!
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he's had a similar issue with his eyes like this before bc i didn't know he was allergic to fish, and i gave him salmon flavored food and the vet gave me some stuff and he was okay. (i literally had to pry open his eyes for this picture, he's having a hard time opening them)
he also has ptsd (yes, for real) about getting his nails cut so he will NOT let me touch them and i cant risk him hurting himself trying to get away from me right now (or biting me), and its $33 to get it done at his vet and they absolutely need to be cut asap bc i'm also sure thats throwing off his balance.
like i said before the flea stuff i have isnt strong enough to help him, so he's losing more hair and scratching himself bloody even tho i'm giving him a bath every other day. (he also has a skin condition that makes this all 100x more painful for him - the meds that he needs help with that skin condition as well. it also clears his chronic ear infections which is another reason i think he's wobblily and off balance)
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some-stars · 1 month ago
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now that im back in my right mind i've gone RIGHT back to losing said mind thinking about sexually confident top logan. like yes i do love him submissive and breedable as much as the next gal but i fully believe that man knows how to show his partner a really good time, starting with his flirtation game that wade is NOT ready for. because listen, when logan finally starts to get comfortable and emerge from his self-loathing shell, he's gonna be absolutely lethal. sliding his big hand across wade's lower back when he passes by him in the kitchen, calling him 'pretty boy' and 'princess,' matching wade's dumb sex jokes with his own slightly less explicit but 100% sincere sex jokes. wade tries to fluster logan by wearing a crop top and daisy dukes and striking a pose and logan just looks him up and down real slow before nodding his approval and beckoning wade over with a heated smile.
(wade bluescreens at the prospect of actually putting his money where his mouth is and flees the apartment. he gets halfway down the stairs before remembering that this is actually a better outcome than the one he expected, and bursts back through the door a minute later like "hi, sorry, i was not prepared to be sexually nuked from orbit by the hottest man alive this morning, can we do another take? i'm 100% ready to be seduced now, come on, lay it on me.")
anyway this ends with logan fucking him so right until he can't talk anymore, and then for a while after that, but that should probably be its own post and/or fic. and it definitely involves logan making fun of him for being so cock-hungry and desperate for it (the teasing is affectionate and only mean in the sexy way, and wade is very, very into it).
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imjustdelusionalok · 30 days ago
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yandere dc: meeting camgirl! darling <3 pt. 1
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have you ever wondered if...
the batboys and conner k. have met cam girl! reader?
The answer is..... yes! She has met most of them, but the same cannot be said to the other poor precious viewers of hers ;( feel very bad to the other members of the young justice and teen titans for that.
Warning for everyone: darling and my headcanons is sooooo unserious, and darling is probably a gen z-er whose referencing too much tiktok trends 😭 be warned
and anywho, these are my headcanons for their meetings <33
please repost i luv you >0!!!
 
₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎
ᵈⁱᶜᵏ ᵍʳᵃʸˢᵒⁿ ᵃᵏᵃ, 'ⁿⁱᵍʰᵗʷⁱⁿᵍ':
one of our witty girl's most biggest and annoying dedicated fans in her stream! (He ranks 3rd in donating, and 1st in annoyance)
this man is LOADED with money, and knowing how darling can get greedy sometimes... yk what happens.
(not like he has any complain tho, as long as her attentions on him, shes allowed to take, take, take, take, and take from him <3)
How he met her fr is during on one of his late night patrols in bludhaven, he finds her on one of the empty streets in the city.
He gasps, very worried but so so excited.
'Bunny! :0' is what this man immediately thinks. Its his term of endearment for you, for looking so innocent and soft... yet so fierce and mischievious once known. (Live you is CRAZY.)
But 'Bunny', after seeing the man in blue and black latex, stood so still to the point of looking like this: 🧍‍♀️
You and him had a staring contest, so awkward and silenttt
Tho he snaps out of his train of thoughts when you finally, start to move.
Nightwing: !!!?!?!??
Darling: ....👋👋
nightwing: ...oh--
The hero of bludhaven could only pout inward, your normally so talkative and so very sharp tongued, so why wont you talk to him like you always do bunny? :( (this man forgot hes in his nightwing persona for a sec 🤦)
Turns out, our dear is very awkward when around people :( (or atleast to strangers face to face, bc she has absolutely ZERO shame when it comes to online people and her friends-- or that depends idk bc girly is unpredictable)
Anyways, before he could speak up, you ran away.
Nightwing was very worried, so he stalked followed you as you make your way back home.
Once you locked your doors and go to sleep, he takes a sigh of relief... but not before pulling out his phone and taking a picture of your address and place.
<3 what a nice little home his darling has.
(From that point on, you see this man in both his hero and civilian persona almost too often for your taste.)
Darlings pov on dick is that hes pretty f*cking annoying, and nightwing is 100 times worse
Fun fact: you often throw things at him, curse at him, or sometimes even FLASH at him whenever hes nightwing.
(he once tripped on a slime you threw and he fell straight down to a garbage can. Whoops.)
you think hes lame sauce and cringe af
you also think hes the type to say 'Golly' Unironically. (Hmm maybe u should start calling him that 😈)
Darling seeing dick/nightwing on top of the roof of another house infront of her own: go home you sicko 😾
Nightwing literally camped on top of it with the rest of the batboys visiting him + watching darling also: 🏃‍♂️🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️ (minus a running jason since he CANNOT be caught watching her as he has the 2nd best relationship with her in his hero identity)
Yandere rating: 100% on money, ∞% for nuisance, 50% for humor (-100% as nightwing sadly)
ᓚ₍ ^. .^₎
ʲᵃˢᵒⁿ ᵗᵒᵈᵈ ᵃᵏᵃ 'ʳᵉᵈ ʰᵒᵒᵈ':
ofc this man is one of her favorites 😒 darling really has both the worst and at the same time, most interesting taste in men.
Hes in your top 10 on donations, but he can be very busy sometimes ;(
(Huhu but dont u worry, he makes up for it by giving u ur well deserved hundred grand before flying away to the next big battle he has <3)
In civilian, he prolly met u loitering around wayne manor's gates
(Dont ask how darling LIVES in bludhaven, yet is also in gotham 💀)
Your pretty face, so familiar, he recognizes you almost immediately even in his disheveled state in the morning.
...you were that p*rnstar. 😦 (ps: u middle fingered at him after hearing dat)
"--hey, okay, i'm sorry for saying that-" after hearing his apology, you put down your raised fists and eyed him. From head to... waistline actually his dick as you see the very scrumptious outline of it even through his baggy pants.
His eyes follows yours and-- hes flustered! Your such a perv, really, even when not in front of your screen you still do things like this?! >:( (not that hes complaining... he knows u like what u see and maybe wears these types of pants just in case u show up somewhere miraculously like today-)
"...You--" he sighs, pinching his nose. Its so early in the morning and your already at work in spreading chaos--- oh.
He stares down below him, feeling your arms hug him with a sweet smile on your face.
He gets hard a bit. God your even more beautiful face to face--
"Teehee, i always wanted to meet one of my fans :D especially you, mr. Big ;)"
...ah, he feels a lot warmer all of a sudden, the faintest red staining his cheeks. You... your such a cheeky little--
"Hey stop THAT!!--" he shouts, as you snuggle him aggressively >:)
(After that, he gives you some hefty money, and you feel very blessed afterwards and asked if hed liked a 'hawk tuah' as a reward)
...he dont know wtf is a hawk tuah. "You and your weird trends..." he groans, but watches you run around. like a playful little kitty.
If your a bunny to dick, then your a small little kitten to him. It makes more sense, you arent fit to be a bunny, your way too loud to be one--
"Hey i heard that >:(" he sees you stomp your feet.
...okay, maybe then just a little bit. Just a little...
Yandere rating: 89% on money, 5% for nuisance, 85% for humor (90% as red hood <3)
(everyone there will be a pt. 2 for tim damian conner and terry so stay tuned 😍)
(update: i think of rewriting this bc pt. 2 is so serious compared to this 😭 i think i was also high)
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mildlyromanticperv · 5 months ago
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What did you expect of me?
Karina x MReader. Fluff. Enemies to lovers.
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-For christ sake, what a bitch! -Your anger boiling in your heart and your brain tells you, no, yells you to go to your managers office and demand a fair treatment, it's just ourageous that among all the workers in the office you have to stay late every single day of the week to cover the "last project of the quarter".
No matter what you do, how hard you work, how many late nights and how many cups of coffee you drink at a day, it just feels like a prison in here, the office that hired you as the main developer for the website on their new brand "Supernova."
Plus, who names a project "Supernova"? Sounds like with just a simple code here and there you'd make the market implode and then explode in money... If your manager Karina expects for that to happen she's either naively hopeful or a total delusional.
-You, come to my office. -Her cold words stabs your brain, after a whole week hearing her low pitch condescending dictatorial voice you can't bear to listen to it one more time, but you need this job like, DESPERATELY need this job, so there's no talk back to the boss.
-Yes boss?
-We're behind on the project, have you been slacking off again? -Her cold judgemental gaze falls upon your black sacked eyes showing off the immense exhaustion you have tu put up with during the project.
-Look boss, I'm doing my best, I haven't slept well these past few days but I assure you I will have everything ready by next month even if the useless of my coworkers don't do shit. -Your tongye got the best of you and runs wild. -I just need to have a good night sleep, can you let me out early today?
-No, we are all hands on deck and you know that. -She sighs and rubs her forehead in a clear show of stress and disappointment. -Just go back to work and don't screw anything up.
Any person with enough patience would put up with that shit, but not you, not now at least. The condescending tone and the past sleep deprived week has been just too much for you, clearly you're not thinking straight anymore, or perhaps you're thinking clearer...?
-Fuck this.
-Excuse me? -She responds with equal or perhaps even higher anger.
-Fuck this Karina, I'm not doing any more shit today and I'm tired to put up with your fucking demands. Fire me if you want I'm going home to sleep. -You really shuld've thought that better, but what is done is done, you start to pick up your stuff and bracing yourself for the shouting match.
-You cross that door and you're suspended, one week half pay. -Surprisingly enough instead of picking up a fight and shouting her vocal cords off as she usually does, she just stares straight into your eyes with a gaze so cold it could freeze hell itself. -You're not the only developer in our payroll, if I wanted I could fire your sorry ass right now and make it so you never work as a developer never again in your life, so consider this a favour.
Breathe.
Don't let that tone of hers get into your core.
Just, breathe.
-Fuck you. -It's the only thing you get to say before actually leaving.
-One week suspension no pay, and don't you dare call me or text me asking to forgive you. Jackass.
With the anger oozing through your pores you just slam the door and head out. You start your car and praying you don't crash you go from 0 to 100 in just a couple of seconds screeching the tires of your car.
-Please god, take care of him... -She sighs under her breath.
But wait... What?
Take care of him?
During that next week there was absolutely no news from you on the office, things started to be more... tense. You've received a ton of messages from your coworkers basically begging him to come back, but the answer is defenitive: No.
However things don't ever go your way.
*Bzz* *Bzz* *Bzz*
-Hey, we need to talk, come to the office. -Again, that swee... No. Annyoing voice again.
-I'm suspended. -Your answer comes as soon as the thought hits your brain.
A sigh from the other line and a faint whisper.
-This man is going to be the death of me some day. -But then the usual tone returns. -Look, I made a rash decision and we need your intel, you're the one that knows the way around our software.
-I thought you had several developers in your payroll, I bet they can help. -You say sipping through the wine you bought for that dinner for one you've been pushing away so much due to the job.
-I'm asking nicely, and around here you know that's as rare as an unicorn. Just come here tomorrow and finish the project, we're ahead.
-Ahead? What do you mean ahead? You said we we're behind last week! -Your voice comes harsher and harsher, even though your chest is telling you not to.
Not to her.
-I lied to try and make things faster, okay? Just come and we can talk like professionals. -She couldn't come to acknowledge the fact that she just wanted to see you. She couldn't admit that she misses your cologne, your three day beard and your stoic gaze when you're so deep in thought. -I'll send you the advances that have been made.
Right away she hangs up the phone, relieved she didn't break down into yelling or insults. Right away an email arrives on your computer with such incredibly... small advances looks like you carried the entire project all by yourself.
-Why am I not surprised? -You sigh under your breath as you pause the movie you were watching and read what has been done, immediately you start chaning... well, almost everything.
Next day...
You should at least turn off the car, for real, have you seen how expensive the gas is around these days?
"Just go, I avoid her any longer... I- I don't want to..." -It's the only thought that crosses your mind, the thought of seeing her piercing eyes again, the feeling of her gaze piercing and burning through your very soul, the loud beating of your heart as you look at her lips...
Her lips...
If only she wasn't your boss, right?
-So, I checked the non existent advances the useless guys did, and...
-How you've been? Have you slept well? -For some reason her tone wasn't condescending anymore, the worry present on her voice...
Could it be?
-Yes, finally in months I've been sleeping great... -Her eyes, oh. my. god... Her eyes... -Anyways, I have everything finished now, you can present it to corporate. -You say trying to avoid her eyes as you speak sarcastically and look at your watch.
-Big date coming or something? -She asks, doing an awesome job yo hide the jealousy.
-Just wondering how long this will take. -She sighs again, feeling the anger and stress of your cold demeanor.
-Your week of suspension ends today and the weekind is off by legal, so you can go now and I'll see you on monday.
-Sure.
After that you just go back to your usual routine, the weekend goes great and the next week of work comes, with so much less stress that even the busiest day feels like a walk through the park. The time off work led you to watch so much shows, and so much free time, time spent in imagining your life outside of work with that person that would make your days so much happier.
Thinking of love.
What a great future you could have, perhaps you could get married and have kids, after all that's your dream.
In a year you'd ascendo in your job, start earning more, you'd start dating to finally get the chance to let you feel that love you so desperately look for, In a year your boss wouldn't be your boss and perhaps you could date her, in a year you'd buy your first...
Your boss? Date... your boss?
Why would you think that? She's a bitch.
"But she's a gorgeous bitch." You thought, perhaps... only perhaps... You wanted that, you liked your boss...
*Bzz* *Bzz* *Bzz*
Your phone rings with a text from your boss.
-Corporate loved the project, we were given monday to celebrate, so I'll be expecting you monday 7:00 A.M. sharp for the party.
-Got it boss. And hey, sorry for snapping out last week. -Perhaps this could be a beginning, you know you should keep things professional, you keep telling yourself to stop but flesh is weak.
-Yeah, just don't be late. -Her response cold as always after 5 minutes of writing and deleting, she's also in the midst of an inner debate, whether let herself feel what she wants to feel for you or just don't say anything.
But why? Why shouldn't you try? Because she's your boss? There's plenty of people that date with their boss and make it work, you shouldn't keep ahold of the prospect of your happiness just because people might judge, that's the whole point, living for yourself and be happy yourself. Isn't it?
That very Monday at 7:00 A.M. you show yourself at work wearing a new white T-shirt and some loose jeans, your usual wrist watch and a new cologne you bought just for your boss, nothing else is going to stop you.
-Hey, boss. -You came to talk to her made a nrevous wreck not really knowing what to do to get her attention.
-Oh, here he is, the brain behind it all. -She wrapped her arm around your shoulders and pulled you closer to present you to some corporate officers like if you were a prize, like you never shouted before... Like you two were friends... Being so close to her made your every sense enter overdrive and your nostrils welcomed her particular scent, that magnificent smell of lavender and strawberries sent your head over the moon.
The rest of the party went completely normal, talking here, showing off there... Taking glances at your boss every once in a while as well.
Wait, did she looked at you as well?
Was she blushing?
-Hey boss can I talk to you for a sec? -You got closer and whispered into her ear, not long after she pointed you to the balcony where you usually go to have your lunch.
-Make it quick.
-Look boss, there's no easy way for me to say this, but I think I should quit... I... I have feelings for you.
-Is that so? -Her cold demeanor makes you back off for a second, unable to tell the truth in her eyes you stutter.
-I know, I know that I was rude last week and I'm being just way too out of line. -Her eyes shine with a glint never seen before, in her mind the thoughts are divided whether she should speak from her heart, as Karina. Or speak from her brain as Ms. Jimin, regional Manager of your branch.
-You know you're my worker, and this is incredibly inappropriate.
-Don't you feel the same for me? I saw you looking for my eyes before.
-Don't be ridiculous, I'm your boss. -Despite the way she feels work ethics comes first, how can a manager could let a worker speak to her that way?
-I don't care. -It's the last thing you said before leaning forward and placing your hand against her cheek, caressing her soft skin and pressing your lips over hers.
For a second all that exists is you and her, together in a tight embrace holding her waist desperately thinking that if you'd ever let go of her she'd just vanish in the thin air. She responds to your advances letting your body invade her personal space, for mere seconds that feel like an eternity all that she can feel is your hands gripping her blouse until she lets go of any ties and wrap her arms around your neck, tipping into her toe-tips to match as much as she can your height.
-We... We can't... I'm your boss... -Her voice comes out cracking, breathing unsteady due to the raw passion she just felt a while ago. -It's inappropriate.
-I don't care, I'll quit if needed, I just care that I want you.
-I want you too. -She rests her head on your shoulder nuzzling her face in the crook of your neck.
You then caress her soft hair, taking a deep breath of her unique scent that send jolts of electricity along your brain.
-So what now, boss? -This time the words come out strong, lovingly, softly.
-Now we talk to HR, couples need to fill paperwork. -She pulls back and looks into your eyes again. -You always make me do more and more paperwork... -She then whispers in your ear. -Sweetie.
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yawnderu · 10 months ago
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Kortac members that would like a bimbo reader..?
Like I can't imagine anybody.
Especially Nikto.
Bimbo reader: look at my nails I made them with a cute colour... Hope you like them🤭💓
Nikto: 👁️👄👁️
Nikto: you're wasting my money for that..?
BFEKBHEHJFKBEHJFKBHBJFKEHJKB
Nikto would NOT do good with a Bimbo!Reader simply because he's too old for that shit and just doesn't get it. Would he fuck her? Yes. Would he date her? No.
Showing him your new plushies or nails would end up with him looking at you with his scary ass eyes like 🔵_🔵 and probably dissociate while staring at you, as he usually does either way fheefhjb
HMMM as for KorTac members that would do well with someone like Bimbo!Reader, I can see Graves, Valeria, and König.
I think Graves in general would 100% be the type to have a trophy wife, pretty little thing clinging to his arm in public, perfect body showing in the skimpy clothes you love to wear. It's natural for a man with money to spoil you, mainly buying lingerie and dresses that leave little to the imagination, though he also buys you things for your special interests and supports your hobbies.
Valeria, well... having a pretty thing like you is a far cry from all the war and violence in Las Almas, keeping you away from that place and kept a secret so the enemy cartels don't hunt you down. She's seen how ruthless they can be— she's a huge part of cartel violence as well, so she makes sure to keep you safe and guarded away from any of her enemies, never once being seen with you in public even when she secretly sometimes hopes she was able to give you a normal relationship.
König loves coming home to his pretty, bimbo girlfriend. You keep him in check and show him a more optimistic perspective than what someone as cocky and pessimistic as him is used to. Even when you're not the brightest tool in the shed, you're not afraid to knock him down a peg whenever he gets too cocky, and he absolutely adores to spoil you. He makes good money— what's the point in that if not buying lovely lingerie and dresses for his girl?
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shirefantasies · 10 months ago
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hi!! I love your writing so I'd like to request if that's ok :D please could you write a preference scenario (romantic plz) for all the Hobbit characters with an s/o with touch as their love language? if you'd feel comfortable making it a little suggestive then that'd be amazing but don't worry if not, fluff is more than ok with me!
thank you! <3
Your kind words do my heart wonders lovie 🥹🥰 also absolutely 100% take my metaphorical money 💸🫶🏻 some are more suggestive than others just based on the personalities/natures of the characters but I really hope you love it!!! 💕 threw in some extra non-company characters since the ask sounded comprehensive, enjoy 😉
The Hobbit Characters + Physical Affection (Suggestive Version)
Balin
✧ His contented sighs and sounds of pleasure at your affection are some of the most encouraging things you’ve heard.
✧ Loves pressing kisses to your bare shoulders.
✧ Balin is always the one to help dress you, little touches like doing up your laces and things, but he is also the one who helps undress you at the end of the day. Hands carefully working over you to undo every tie of your garments, eyes trying not to roam too far, instead opting to search yours…
✧ He has this little habit of sliding his hands up your sleeves to caress your arms.
✧ Occasionally calls you a pet name he tends to reserve for in private just to flip the script upon his own reaction to your touches.
Dwalin
✧ Gives you the proudest smirk and chuckles deeply when he feels your hands upon him.
✧ You rest your head against him only to feel him move it aside with a surprising gentleness before his lips are on your neck.
✧ When you tell him that you’re cold and reach into the folds of his coat, he remarks with great satisfaction that he knows a way you two could keep warm.
✧ Sparring sessions with Dwalin tend to end up with you pinned and straddled, his gaze boring intensely into yours.
✧ Party trick as it may seem to be, Dwalin can even turn lifting you up on his bicep sensual if he so desires, his other hand reaching for you as you pull to his lips.
Thorin
✧ The type to tell you ‘no, not here’ when he feels you pulling into him, then cave and proceed to kiss you so hard you lose all breath in your lungs.
✧ The further your relationship goes on, soon it will come to your notice how accustomed you are to the feeling of Thorin’s hand protectively about your waist nearly at all times, giving it the occasional squeeze.
✧ Cannot keep his hands off you if you wear his coat, especially if you are wearing little to nothing else.
✧ It’s irresistible to tease Thorin just to see the arch of his brows in surprise at your forward motions, be they placing his hands upon you or roaming yours over him.
✧ Driving Thorin crazy is quite easy, my friend- simply whisper “yes, My King” in his ear.
Oin
✧ Shamelessly makes jokes about how you should slow down, he is the one who's supposed to give you the check-up after all.
✧ Knowing the most about bodies and being studied in their reactions, he very quickly learns both your habits and in turn the places you prefer to be touched.
✧ His massages are expert, heavenly, his hands working over all the right muscles and spots. Such moments are an excuse for you to look through Oin’s oils and choose your favorite scent or mood.
✧ Insists he only know how to undress you so fast from having to do it in emergencies, he swears…
✧ Whispers his desires into your ear, but favors your love of demonstrations to save you having to call out private matters through his trumpet in front of the whole camp.
Gloin
✧ If you were to open up a dictionary and look up the word 'handsy', you would see a picture of Gloin beneath it; he adores the fact that you're the same, proud to tell anyone you can't keep your hands off him.
✧ One of his favorite sensations upon this earth is the way your hands slide over his chest, sometimes even grabbing the edges of his coat, as your lips collide.
✧ Another is when your fingers tangle into his hair, even if they end up pulling a bit.
✧ Bedtime all but brings Gloin wrestling you down into position where he can hold you or lie on top of you. Whether you stay that way or not is up to you…
✧ Puffs out his chest first, then sweeps you into the kiss of a lifetime the day you absentmindedly run your hands over him and squeeze his arms, complimenting his muscles.
Bifur
✧ When allowed to, his hands will roam your body as if trying to memorize every inch of it.
✧ Absentmindedly strokes a hand up and down your legs when you throw them in his lap.
✧ Has been known to silently slip off articles of your clothing and offer pieces of his instead.
✧ In addition to that, he has the teasing habit of sliding hands into your clothes, especially when they’ve gotten cold, just to see and feel the way you contort and shiver in shock.
✧ Signs obscene things with such a straight face or look of mild questioning when you initiate affection, laughing wickedly at your reply of shock or eagerness.
Bofur
✧ I maintain that Bofur adores affection and is unafraid to show it, even going so far as to hold you in his lap and show you (and the fact that only he can do that) off!
✧ As you stand together, foreheads resting against each other, you can feel his hands draw patterns upon your hips.
✧ Even cuddling with Bofur is quite a sensual experience, your limbs a tangle and his lips often sneaking their way to find your neck or chest.
✧ You can always feel him smile against you when your tongue slides to the seam of his lips, deepening the kiss instantly.
✧ Bofur also quite enjoys nibbling on your earlobes if you let him, taking breaks between kisses over there.
Bombur
✧ Blushes at your affections and gives you a look like you are an angel upon the earth.
✧ Main offender of turning a peck onto the cheek into more at the last minute, turning to capture your lips instead.
✧ Occasionally forgets himself amidst your nature and gets a wee bit too comfortable; tells you you have something on your face at dinner and then proceeds to kiss or lick it off like that’s normal procedure.
✧ Almost always has a hand upon your knee or thigh beneath the table, too. Sometimes it remains stationary, other times not so much.
✧ Tends to mirror the affections you give under the assumption that you give what you desire. Sometimes does the things that pleasure you most with the silence, but the most eager look you’ve ever seen, questioning if he’s doing well because frankly he enjoys the praise.
Dori
✧ Definitely more prim and proper about things, so all of that must be in private!
✧ That being said, 'collecting firewood' is a great excuse to go somewhere secluded and enjoy each other’s company behind a tree.
✧ Always asking if you’re enjoying things to learn what gives you the most pleasure, following your responses to his every kiss and touch.
✧ You can feel it in the way he touches you, responds to your touch, that he is all but wondering if you are real or someone who stumbled forth from his wildest dreams set to disappear back into the recesses of his mind.
✧ Takes your hand and places kisses up your arm, sometimes getting less gentlemanly as he goes along.
Nori
✧ You are two peas in a pod! Keeping his hands to himself is barely in Nori’s vocabulary.
✧ When you kiss you can fully expect to feel them roaming, sometimes settling for a grip upon the hindquarters or others running up and down your back.
✧ Lets his lips brush the shell of your ear as he leans in to whisper all sorts of messages, be they comments on the others or promises for the evening.
✧ If your hair is long enough, he loves to tangle his hands in it and tug it in your most intimate moments.
✧ Do not expect to sit down without his grip upon your thigh or even the feeling of your skirt’s edge lifting if you wear one…
Ori
✧ Goes bright red at the way you’re always keeping connected, a hand over his or even both around him.
✧ When you yank him in by the scarf for a passionate kiss, why he’s in heaven, smiling into every motion.
✧ Desperation colors his kisses at times, sending his hands gripping you for dear life and his lips searching for treasure he finds with you again and again.
✧ Has never voiced this, but you can tell by the way his breath hitches that he loves it when you wrap your legs around him.
✧ If he is feeling quite bold you may catch Ori sneaking a hand into your pocket, usually to find yours or place a little surprise gift knowing the small touch keeps your heart warm.
Fili
✧ Loves the way your hands slide around his waist and up his tunic, searching for the warmth of his skin.
✧ Knowing how loved you feel by his touch, Fili often keeps you right beneath his arm, halfway embracing as you stroll.
✧ Traps you with his legs upon taking his desired big spoon role, finding new and creative ways to wrap them around you that may apply in later times as well.
✧ Adores when you shuffle underneath him while he does push-ups, kissing your lips, cheeks, or neck with each bob down. You know the shifts of his mood by if this changes to bites.
✧ Bites upon your neck are another common occurrence, leaving you to tease him that you’ll need a whole new wardrobe of turtlenecks!
Kili
✧ He’s right there with you, whether it’s simply wanting to be holding hands all the time or playfully giving your arse a light smack as you walk by!
✧ You two already have the habit of resting one’s legs upon the other’s lap, but if you happen to wear a skirt when it’s your turn…
✧ Cups your face and looks at you with the biggest smile, breathless in your presence before a kiss that has you barely separating for air, but never fully apart.
✧ One of his habits is catching your hands as they trace over his body when they reach a spot he really likes to be touched.
✧ His hands tend to slide down your back and settle upon your hindquarters when you two share kisses.
Bilbo
✧ Sometimes you’ll just pass the burglar by, running a hand down his arm and giving him a look that has him flushing beet red.
✧ Another one who prefers these things in private, but if you initiate and Bilbo is feeling quite bold he may deftly sneak a hand into your back pocket as you walk. Only if no one is behind you two, of course.
✧ Nuzzles his nose against your before kissing you like he isn’t about to dip you passionately.
✧ Whatever access to your skin is granted, Bilbo practically worships it, awed and reverent in his every touch.
✧ He loves resting his head against your chest, nuzzling in there and if he can peppering it with little kisses or maybe even nips.
Thranduil
✧ Teases the dickens out of you for the way you seek out his touch, practically purring into kisses and running your hands over his shoulders.
✧ Only to turn around and run his nails down your spine as your lips meet again and again…
✧ Upon shared meals, sometimes he will feed you things by hand, hoping you will be unafraid to let him feel you taking it from him.
✧ Much as you love surprising him with kisses, Thranduil hopes you enjoy the deeper feeling of your tongues entwined as much as he does. He is unafraid to use his tongue really practically anywhere you’ll let him.
✧ Trails kisses along your collarbones when you sit in his lap, often upon his throne.
Bard
✧ Laketown's bowman is opening himself to affection again, and receiving it is aiding in that pursuit, reminding him to give in to the desire to show it.
✧ Snaking a hand around your waist, he tugs you against his chest, smiling at the fall of your hand upon him.
✧ His eyelids flutter involuntarily shut at the feeling of your hand dragging slowly down his chest or along the length of his spine.
✧ You can feel his lips part in pure shock the first time your tongue travels along their entrance, but with great haste you are let in.
✧ Even if he is not always forthcoming with it, Bard longs for the comfort of another body nearly as much as you do. As he falls asleep, you can feel him relax, his head buried between your neck and shoulder as one hand travels up and down.
Beorn
✧ He definitely isn’t used to physical affection, starting or even glaring in surprise at first, but when he realizes your love is true, that is when you begin to feel the way Beorn melts into your touch, something different glinting in his brown eyes.
✧ His favorite form of affection is, quite simply, holding you against his chest, height allowing him to rest his head atop yours. From there, Beorn can hardly resist the way you lean up to press kisses to his neck.
✧ You tend to initiate many of your shared kisses, but Beorn inadvertently deepens them with his habit of nipping at your lips. He apologizes, but you assure him he has nothing to worry about.
✧ Finding out you love to cuddle means you’ll hardly find yourself sleeping without Beorn’s form draped protectively over you. Whether he soothes you or claims you entirely depends upon the night.
✧ Beorn’s bear-like tendencies come out in his affection sometimes, the way he rubs his head or sides against yours.
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therealcocoshady · 3 months ago
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Could you make a one shot where Marshall x Reader have been dating for almost 2 years, they start talking about kids and the thought of reader pregnant is a big turn on for him.
Author’s Note : Thank you for your request 💕. I hope you enjoy this ! ⭐️
If you like my writing and want to support it, here’s my Ko-Fi (I’m also open for commission. It’s like a request but that way you’re 100% sure I see it fast & indulge you 😉 - rn I have 200+ asks in my Inbox. Also, by commissioning my work, you’re literally helping a struggling neurodivergent student get by !).
Baby talk
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You were the first one to be surprised when you felt it. The desire to have kids. You had never been a kid person. You had always found these tiny humans to be terribly underwhelming. To be fair, you didn’t hate them. But you never really understood what all the fuss surrounding babies was. Puppies ? Yes. Kittens ? Absolutely. Human babies ? Meh. When you were a kid yourself, you didn’t show an interest in babies and, as far as you could remember, you had never really enjoyed playing with dolls. And growing up, you hadn’t shown more of an interest in the topic of motherhood. Older people had told you you’d change your mind and eventually come to want kids of your own but you doubted it. When you became an adult and got into serious relationships, you had that talk with your partners and you told them you didn’t want to have children. You enjoyed your free time, being able to sleep until noon if you wanted to, the possibility of spending money on silly things like an impromptu girls trip to Vegas or a new handbag instead of diapers and an overpriced daycare. In your mind, it was clear that you weren’t meant to be a mother. You did have a lot of love and admiration for parents around you, but you didn’t envy them. So you built a child free life that was absolutely wonderful. Sure, it hurt a bit when your previous partner ended up breaking up with you because he changed his mind about kids and you didn’t. But you understood his decision and knew it was the right thing to do, rather than forcing yourself to have kids when you did not have any actual desire for it. You didn’t want to force yourself to live a life that did not resemble you, taking the risk of one day resenting the children you never wanted to raise in the first place. It all worked out in the end : your ex went on to marry a woman who, from what you heard, was wonderful and have a kid with her, and you ended up meeting the love of your life. 
Marshall was everything you hoped to find in a partner. He was kind, funny, thoughtful, knowledgeable on a lot of subjects and handsome. Yes, he was older than you, but he was definitely young at heart. If anything, you benefited from his experience in life. Also, him being older and having three grown-up children meant that he was « done with all of that », which was a relief. The feeling was mutual, his lack of desire for more kids having caused a couple of breakups for him as well. But just because the two of you decided not to have babies didn’t mean you didn’t have your hands full with them. Marshall was a loving uncle to his brother’s three kids and you were entering that stage of your life where all your friends were starting families. So whether it was a birthday party, a basketball game, a recital or a baby shower… you had your share of kid-related activities. You liked it though. More than you ever thought you would. Marshall being very family-oriented, he loved that you were involved with his family. Together, you built a perfect life. You had all the fun that came with being around kids, without the obligations. You were the fun aunt and uncle, who enjoyed spoiling other people’s kids rotten and playing with them, before happily handing them back to their parents and letting them handle the sugar crash and the noise caused by the toys you bought them. You thought you’d spend the rest of your life just like this, perfectly content, enjoying a peaceful existence with your boyfriend, with whom you would eventually grow old. 
But then, without seeing it coming, you found yourself thinking about it. Wondering how you would look like with a baby bump. Pregnant ladies had always looked like aliens to you, but you started thinking you’d actually be cute, carrying a little baby. Marshall’s baby. A baby with the cutest nose, pouty lips and the most beautiful blue eyes. The thought of a baby that would be part you part Marshall had your heart melt. And you knew he’d be such a good baby daddy, too. Obviously, he had raised three amazing daughters he was very proud of, but he was also amazing with other people’s children. He was his nephews’ favorite person in the world and he was so great with your friends’ babies. So you found yourself thinking that, if you got accidentally pregnant, it wouldn’t be the worst thing on earth. Sure, it would be inconvenient, but maybe you’d keep it. Not that it would ever happen anyway, since you were more than diligent with birth control. Then, it turned into thinking about what your life would actually look like with a little one. And you figured that, what you would have found dreadful years ago, maybe wouldn’t be so bad. Maybe you’d crush it as a soccer mom. Maybe there was actually something beautiful in having kids with someone you love, teaching them stuff and watching them grow up. 
Then, one day, it hit you like a ton of bricks. You actually wanted to have kids. With Marshall. You were at the store, doing your weekly shopping. How you ended up in the baby aisle, you weren’t sure. But you found yourself mesmerized by the tiny items of clothing. Eventually, you came to your senses and mentally slapped yourself. You were with a man in his fifties, who already had his kids and did not want more. Now was not the time to change your mind. As if to imprint the thought in your brain, you went and stocked on condoms, buying a fuckton of them. The cashier even threw you a weird glance. You probably looked like you were doing  a comparative study, getting a bit of everything from ribbed ones to flavored ones. Marshall chuckled when he saw them in the bag. 
That’s a lot of condoms, he chortled. 
Yeah, there was some kind of sale, you lied. 
He shrugged it off and promised to put them to good use. You knew he would make good on his word and figured you just needed to have that silly idea banged out of your system. Except that it didn’t work. You went a few months without talking to him about it. But the more time went on, the more you realized you really wanted a baby with this man. You still liked the idea of having a flexible schedule and 9 hours of sleep a night. But you didn’t love it as much as you loved the idea of carrying this man’s offspring. And the more time went on, the harder it was not to talk to him about it. You dreaded this, though. Because you’d been on the receiving end of that conversation. Of not wanting kids and having someone you loved tell you that they wanted to start a family with you, and having to disappoint them and see the heartbreak in their eyes. So you put it off as long as you could. Until one evening, you weren’t able to hold yourself. 
I think I want a baby, you blurted out when you walked in the kitchen while Marshall was cooking dinner.
You think you want what, baby ? He asked as he turned to you. Sorry, I didn’t hear you over the noise of that kitchen fan. 
No, I said I-I think I want a baby, you repeated nervously. 
You think you want a baby ? He repeated carefully. 
I mean… yeah, you simply said. 
He looked at you with a raised eyebrow. Clearly, you were taking him by surprise. He turned off the fan and the kitchen stove, before walking to you. 
That’s new, he said matter-of-factly. 
Kind of, you admitted. I mean… I’ve been thinking about it for some time now. 
So you don’t think you to have want a baby. You know you want to have one, he pointed out. 
Y-yeah. I’m sorry, you mumbled as you looked down. 
For how long have you thought about it ? He asked. 
I’m not sure, you admitted. Does it matter ? 
I thought you didn’t want to be a mom, he said. That you were perfectly happy with being an aunt. That it was the best of both worlds. That’s what you said. 
I know, you replied. And I meant it. I’m as surprised as you are, really. But then I thought about how I’d react if I got pregnant. And I realized I wouldn’t mind that. Having a baby that’s part you and part me. 
Oh wow, he said as he scratched the back of his head. 
Yeah, you hummed. And I thought it was just something random and that I’d forget about it. But I can’t. And it’s been months now, and I think you have great genes and that our baby would be really cute. And Target has the most adorable baby clothes and I know condoms are cheaper than a college education but there were little bunnies on the pajamas I saw the other day and I also found out that they make baby Jordan sneakers that look like the ones you love and-
You caught yourself rambling and stopped talking. Now, you weren’t making any sense and you were just dumping the whole thing on him. Probably not the best way to go about it. He was staring at you with an amused look on his face. 
I’m sorry, you said will a sad voice. I know you’re done with it. We’ve talked about it and I know it really sucks that I’m changing my mind but I needed to tell you because I’ve been thinking about it a lot and-
Do you plan on letting me speak ? He asked with a smile. 
Yes. Sorry. 
Ok, he chuckled. I have a few questions. Is there a reason why you changed your mind ? 
Well… you, I guess, you shrugged. I mean, I love you, and I see what an amazing father, what a great uncle you are. 
Ok, he said. And, another question : is that something you want ? Or is it something you need ? 
I don’t know, you admitted. I’m really happy with our life just the way it is. I don’t need a baby to be fulfilled and for my life to have meaning. But I can’t stop thinking of how much I’d like a baby with you. 
Ok, he hummed. So… it’s not something you’d break up over ? 
No, you said. I love you. I want to spend my life with you. And I don’t think I want a baby if I can’t have it with you. You’re the reason I want one. Because the baby I have in my mind… he has your eyes, your nose and your smile. 
Meh. Doesn’t sound too cute, he chuckled. If anything, it sounds like an ad for contraception. 
Oh, come on, you giggled. 
But… he ? He asked with a smile. 
Sometimes she, you corrected. I never really wanted kids so I don’t really care, I guess. Look, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to just dump this whole thing on you… we both know this talk sucks. But I couldn’t really keep it to myself. I needed to tell you. I’m sorry. 
Quit apologizing, babe, he said reassuringly. I’m glad you told me. 
Really ? You asked nervously. 
Of course, he replied. I can tell it hasn’t been easy for you. 
You nodded and he pulled you into his arms before pressing a kiss to the top of your head. You closed your eyes and inhaled his scent. You definitely felt lighter after telling him, even though it didn’t really change anything. 
So… can I get back to you on that ? He finally asked. 
Huh ?! You asked as you looked up from his chest.
I think I’m gonna need a bit of time to think about it, he continued. I can’t promise I’ll say yes. But I’ll consider it. 
Wait… seriously ? You asked in shock. 
Isn’t that why you brought it up in the first place ? He mused. 
I don’t know, you said. I guess I mostly expected you to convince me it was a terrible idea. I mean, you’ve broken up with people over that. 
So have you, he pointed out. But it’s you. It’s us. What we have is different. I feel like my family’s complete so I never really wanted to have another kid. But I’m in love with you. And if there’s anyone I’d give it a shot with… it’s you. 
Ok, you said with an emotional smile. 
I’m not saying yes to anything, though, he warned. Don’t get your hopes up. 
But you’re not saying no, you pointed out with a smile. 
I’m not, he agreed. Because even though having kids can be tough… it’s pretty great, too. And I know you’d be a great mom. 
You flashed him a smile and buried your face in his chest.  The simple fact that he was willing to consider it because he loved you filled your heart with joy. 
You didn’t really bring up the topic in the following weeks, but you could see a change in Marshall’s demeanor whenever someone around you talked about kids. You could absolutely tell he was thinking about it. You weren’t too sure what the best way to go about it was. Of course, you were curious to know how he felt about it, what was on his mind. But you didn’t want to be annoying and press him on the matter, so you figured that it was probably better to wait for him to get back to you on that, once his mind was made up. 
Waiting was trying, though. Because in the meantime, you had to watch him interact with countless babies and young children, feeling like your ovaries exploded. Patience is a virtue and that waiting period was definitely an opportunity for you to practice it. Thankfully, it finally came to an end when you came back from work to Marshall waiting for you in the living room, with a bouquet of roses on the table, as well as a paper bag. You greeted him and thanked him for the nice gesture.
What’s the occasion ? You asked. 
Since when do I need a special  occasion to treat my woman to some roses and a present ? He asked back. 
Touché, you giggled. Thank you my love. Can I open the bag ? 
Not yet, he said. I want you to have a look at this first. 
He handed you some papers and you skimmed through it. It was a printing of his schedule for the foreseeable future. You looked at him with a raised eyebrow. 
That’s, erm, fine ? You said, unsure of what he was expecting you to say. 
It’s my schedule, he said. For the next two years. 
I see that, you chuckled. I’m just not sure why you’re showing it to me ? You usually don’t consult me when it comes to your work schedule. 
As you can see, I’ve moved a couple of trips that were already planned, he explained as he pointed to a few dates. Meaning that I’ll be going to LA a little bit more in the upcoming three months. But after that, no more work trips and I put a hold on the performance planning. I’ll stay in Detroit. 
Ok ? You said - still not grasping what he was getting at. That’s nice. But why did you change the schedule ? Is there a specific reason why you need to stay here ? 
Apparently, when you’re trying to have a baby with your woman, it’s better to be in the same city, he grinned. 
You stared at him in shock, your mouth slightly agape. Marshall was smiling from ear to ear. Next thing he knew, you were in his lap, arms wrapped around his neck, peppering your face with kisses. 
Oh my God, you said emotionally. Really ? Oh I love you so much, Marshall ! 
I love you too, he hummed. 
I can’t believe it, you whispered. Wait- What’s in the bag ? 
Open it, he chuckled. 
You reached for it and saw it contained a bunch of ovulation prediction kits, pregnancy tests, some folic acid and some lube. 
Apparently, these are the basic essentials for trying to conceive, he commented. 
You’re amazing, you said with the biggest smile on your face. So… we’re doing this ? We’re making a baby ?
If you haven’t changed your mind, yeah, he nodded. 
As a response, you threw yourself in his arms and kissed him passionately. He chuckled into the kiss and cupped your face, staring at you lovingly. 
I’ll give you the cutest baby, you promised. 
I have no doubt, he grinned. 
Do you think I’ll be a pretty pregnant lady ? You mused. 
Are you kidding me ? He asked. God, you’re going to be so hot. The thought of you carrying my baby… You have no idea the things it does to me. 
Oh yeah ? Like what ? You asked defiantly. Show-
Before you had the chance to finish your sentence, Marshall had you pinned to the couch and was grinding against you. It didn’t matter that you were both fully clothed, you could feel his excitement through the fabric. 
I’m gonna fill your pretty pussy, he promised. And I’m gonna make a pretty mama out of you. 
Mmmyes, you whimpered. 
Gonna give you a pretty belly, he continued. I can’t wait to see you carry our child. Can’t wait to start trying. 
When ? You asked pleadingly.  
How about now ?  He whispered in your ear. 
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