#my mom did some really messed up abusive things when i was a child but i have a decent relationship with her now

[bestworstcase]

Wouldn't mind that Blake & Birdbandit post, not least because fndm's whole 'catGF's role here is to Protectively Glare at the badmom and/or rub her loyalty to Yang in Rae's face'…thing has struck me as reductive & blinkered for quite some time.

lol yeah it’s… kind of obvious that a lot of people aren’t thinking about it in terms of characterization and narrative, they’re thinking about it in terms of wanting yang to receive some degree of protection from raven’s abandonment (even if it’s performative, even if in reality that kind of behavior from a romantic partner in a situation where you’re trying to work out a relationship with your absent/estranged mother is… obnoxious at best, making it all about how the partner feels at worst.)

but like

the thing is blake ran away from yang out of self-loathing cowardice too, and by the time she meets raven, raven has come back and made a serious commitment to make amends, not just to yang but to everybody. she’s back in the inner circle, that suggests a monumental effort to change –

and blake, uh, knows how hard it is to make that kind of change, to come back and apologize and face those fears after running away, because She Did That. not just with yang but also her own parents!

blake is also by a… pretty wide margin the most forgiving member of team rwby, the one most willing to offer second chances, to listen and empathize with people she thinks can be reached, we saw this play out with ilia. and weiss, after weiss acknowledged she’d done wrong and demonstrated willingness to change back in v1. she’s the only one of team rwby who isn’t claws-out toward emerald at the top of risk, and she’s the first one to voice her understanding of why ozpin lied and hid from them. she is, in general, not vindictive or spiteful.

and while i can absolutely see her being more defensive of yang than she is of herself, there is no universe where i can imagine blake of all people engaging in – pardon me – catty mean girl behavior towards raven on yang’s behalf. if she snaps at raven at all it’ll be to rebuke raven saying something caustic, but i don’t think raven is going to be much inclined to be caustic at this juncture.

i imagine it will be more, blake is aloof and wary of raven but cautiously optimistic on yang’s behalf and wholeheartedly supporting whatever yang wants out of reconnecting with her mom, and raven maybe avoids her for a while before venturing to make awkward stabs at conversation, and then blake’s diplomatic and interpersonal skills kick in. they have a fair amount in common personally, and they also have caring about yang in common, and if blake were to express any feelings she has about raven trying to be in yang’s life it would be concern, and probably confided in yang to make sure she understood what yang wanted and how blake can help her. maybe having a careful conversation with raven, later, if they builds up a good enough rapport.

at the end of the day, blake is a) a diplomat and b) way too mature to let whatever private resentment or indignation she feels on yang’s behalf get in the way of letting yang take the lead here. which is the correct way to deal with this situation. incidentally.

[weebsinstash]

As much as I want to have children by this man, let's take a moment to sip our platonic yandere Miguel juice

-i can't decide which sex he'd be more partial to in a 'child'/you since in the movie there was Gabriella but in the comics he eventually has a son who becomes the next Spiderman but--

-as a girl i just naturally think of a lot of those sorts of gender specific ideas 👉👈 he's this big scary hulking intimidating threat and his "daughter" is the one melting his cold exterior

-doesnt matter if you're a grown ass woman, Miguel sees you struggling to braid your hair and suddenly here he is, full dad mode, doing it for you,and depending on how close you two are, maybe he disguises it with "ugh, stop spending so much time messing around with that. If I do it for you will you get back to work? 🙄", but really it's just your new self proclaimed dad/tio wanting to help braid your hair and help you feel pretty and, oh, how he can fondly remember the last time he helped braid "his daughter's" hair...

-of course this evolves to him just loving to do things with your hair. Braid it, wear it natural, style it, use products on it, hes got you. you were just trying to put your hair in a lazy updo like a ponytail or bun and this man doesn't let you leave until he's got you completely combed out, hair braided with ribbons, and of course this entire time youre awkwardly sitting there in a chair in his absolute cave of a workstation with this gargantuan 6'9 man there, "so how was your day? Staying out of trouble?"

-really I mean. Is stealing other people's kids NOT technically in character for him. You're unfortunate enough to trauma bond with this man and you're never getting rid of him

-you hear Miles Morales call him tio (as in the tio meaning dude) and you jokingly teasingly start calling him tio, which Miguel secretly pretends is the version that means uncle. You're just constantly joking around or looking up at him with these big pouty eyes, "but tio 🥺 can't I PLEASE--" and its like. Lmao people know that if they need to ask Miguel for a favor, that it increases their chances to have you ask in their stead

- I mean, as a female adult abused as a child by my own father, raised by a single mom myself, like...

Reader flinches away when Peter B goes to give you a supportive pat on the back or comes in for a high five after a mission and you force yourself to laugh because you're feeling more than just a little awkward and in the spotlight. "Oh, sorry, that was dumb!" And they eventually get you to kind of anxiously word vomit "my dad used to just kind of, rough me up sometimes when I did something wrong! It-it could've been a lot worse honestly, but, it-it just makes me kinda jumpy around guys sometimes! It's not a big deal, or personal or anything. I'm sorry if I made you feel bad 🥺"

Peter B, Jessica, and Miguel all there as older parental figures and also literal parents, immediately exchange looks and agree like "oh hell naw, don't like that" and you get silently adopted by all three of em right then and there

-if it's a physically abusive father and you're still the victim of abuse, I imagine your dad had some suspicious figures suddenly show up in the middle of the night to terrify and threaten the shit out of him and suddenly you aren't getting as manhandled anymore

-can you imagine, like, you show up to Spider Society one day with a black eye "oh, this? It's, it's nothing. My dad is just, he's about to make police captain and he's really stressed about it is all" cue all your friends mentally high fiving around the table because your abusive piece of shit dad is going to die and you don't even know. When it happens they'll all be "oh no, sweetie, I'm SOOOO sorry :(" meanwhile they're thrilled bc now you don't have any parents and they can weasel in there as your new family, schedule your birthday parties, monopolizing more of your time, things like that

-goddd I just imagine it could become some kind of weird fucked up enmeshed scenario where the structure it's providing for your life is actually good for you meanwhile Miguel is like, retroactively kind of soothing some of his trauma both from his own childhood and what happened with the second universe he broke that it's just like. You're a grown ass adult and this man is tucking you in goodnight and saying "te amo, mija" at the doorway and you bet his ass is going to stand there and not let you sleep until you say it back. He knows you're just absolutely seething at him and he'll still refuse to leave without a grumbling "te amo, papá 🙄"

-He eventually just has you doing so much shit and depending on him so much that it starts to become second nature to you. one day you're in the Society doing one of the odd jobs you're allowed to help with and suddenly you're thinking, "Ugh I actually don't know what to do next, I wish Papá was here to-- WAIT SHIT NO I MEAN MIGUEL--"

-lmaooooo as a non Spanish speaker I keep thinking of how awwwwwful it would be if he actually forces you to learn Spanish. Not inherently because there's anything wrong with Spanish, but, I'm not always smart, and I can just SEE him quizzing your ass, forcing you to have entire conversations in Spanish, always clicking his tongue or chuckling at you when you make a mistake and he just thinks you're so cute struggling to learn 🥰 man hears you're trying to take extra lessons from Miles and he instantly drops everything he's doing to go track the little scamp down. Insert meme "I can forgive being an anomaly but I draw the line at teaching Reader bad Spanish"

-siiiiiiigh eventually the day comes when you're in big danger and you need his help, maybe you disobeyed him and was hanging out with some other Spiders in another dimension when there was a sudden villain attack, and he comes to your rescue as a villain does something dramatic like has a gun to your head or a knife to your neck and the second you see him you're just overwhelmed wirh a sense of relief, calling out for him, calling him dad/tio/papá whatever, and he's just like 😭❤️ pumping his fist internally, like YES you are so grounded when you get back home but also 🥰 you finally called him dad without him having to twist your arm 🥰 nevermind if the "villain" who kidnapped you was actually a Spider who owed him a favor, and this whole thing was to teach you a lesson about listening to your Papá, that's not important ❤️

-Miguel who forces you to learn Spanish vs Miguel who forces you to be Catholic. I can excuse kidnapping and forced adoption but I draw the line at making me practice religion 💀 no but seriously, he probably does have certain morals and values he instills/forces upon you if he thinks you need them, and he'll probably be one of those fathers, "are you leaving the house dressed like that? Go change" and orders you not to hang out with certain people he doesn't approve of or thinks have bad character (like hobie lmao)

-bruh you two will be on a super serious important mission and this man will be like "it's dark, hold my hand so we dont get separated"

Eventually it comes to a point where you're, not perfectly behaved but, just about. If someone finds Miguel, it means you're not very far away, or vice versa. Members of the Society quickly learn not to make any advances on you or make any "adult" comments unless they want to get suspiciously hurt during a personal training session by the big boss himself. You think you're safe just cause Miguel isn't around? Nah, cause then you have Peter B and Jess keeping an eye on you, and, not that YOU'RE aware of the extent, but, if Miguel ever gets worried, he can just ask Lyla what you've been getting up to, since your modified little daypass has her installed into it and she can track your every move ❤️ helicopter parent? Oh honey, you have NO idea...

[heartlilith]

My Placements and How They Manifest

Capricorn Ascendent:

My mother told me that when she gave birth to me, it was worse than my other 3 other siblings by far. She had to be induced because there was no sign of me wanting to come out into the world (lol). She said she was in labor for hours and when I finally came out, she started hemorrhaging. It wasn't fatal obviously because she's alive today but yeah, I kind of associate that with my Capricorn rising. Still to this day, change is very uncomfortable for me especially if I have no control over what's happening. My childhood was great until my mom divorced my dad and remarried, that's when shit went south! I had new siblings, a stepfather, and had to see my dad heartbroken while also battling melanoma and being laid off (2008 recession). My sister stayed with him and I went with my mom. They were always fighting and spiting each other but it was my sister and I that missed out. It was always "what is your father saying about me?" yada yada yada. Growing up, I was bullied by my sister a lot, in my opinion, it was more than the usual sibling fights. My mom also took a lot of her anger out on me; she ended up getting a divorce not too long after remarrying, became an alcoholic and filed for bankruptcy. Being a Capricorn rising and dealing with the backlash of that, I always have money saved, ALWAYS. I'm like a squirrel hiding nuts I stg. If I'm completely broke I'm an anxious mess. It's also why I strive to be independent and self sufficient. It's why I manifest being filthy rich. High school was terrible tbh and I battled with depression and anxiety. College was a lot better and moving away from my mom and chaotic family did me well, I went from a 2.6 GPA in high school to 3.85 in college. Rereading this it sounds kinda like a sob story and that's not what I'm trying to accomplish so I'm just going to move on.

1st House Neptune, Uranus, Lilith:

I made a separate post either on here or Reddit about how my features have changed so much over the years. As a child, my hair was blonde then it turned blonde/red in late elementary school. Since then, it's turned darker and darker through the years. Now it's dark brown. My eyes were dark blue as a child and now they're light green - I attribute this to Uranus and Neptune being on my Ascendent. In my opinion, I'm not photogenic at all (Cap rising?) and I think I look different in every picture I take or is taken of me. With Lilith being in my first house, I was sexualized a lot growing up by older guys/men. And also bullied by boys my age; I remember they thought I was "too girly". Guys, I shit you not after I had enough of it, I started showing up with boy shorts and those tank tops guys wear HAHAHA to be more of a "tomboy"... I'm not really sure what that is but yeah, I must've been 10 or 12 or something. People would always say "it's because they have a crush on you/because they like you!" and I would be so confused. Nowadays, I think I rub some people, specifically men, the wrong way and they dislike me for "no reason", or maybe they have a reason but they never come out and say it. My Uranus in the 1st shows up as being quirky I guess? I'm not really sure. Maybe it's that my parents were never disciplinary at all, I could do whatever I wanted. At the time I loved it but deep down I think I wanted to them to care, so I would act more and more reckless. Today, maybe that sets me apart. One last thing about Neptune/Uranus in the 1st is that I can't stand to see people treating people/animals/or what have you, the wrong way. I can't even watch Youtube videos of animals starting off abused... even if the videos end with them being happy and healthy, I CAN'T DO IT. It deeply disturbs me.

Side Note (1st House Lilith):

As a small child I was obsessed with being naked all the time and skinny dipping LMFAO like it was a problem. Luckily there were no creeps and I was fine but would this placement indicate that in anyway? Let me know because it doesn't really fit with my Capricorn rising.

(I'm really sorry this post is so long and detailed I think I'm having word vomit)

Virgo Moon:

As a child I was really reserved and "chill". I already talked about my relationship with my mom and she was critical and whatever. One thing that sticks out about this placement is that she would always push the idea on me to "stay pure" and to "stay innocent", especially when I was a teen. Always pushing this on me. Always telling her friends I was "naive" and yeah maybe I was in a sense. I don't know it's weird how that fits. My mom wasn't all bad though. She definitely had many faults but she was a great mom in certain aspects. Growing up, I realized she's just a human like me, with problems of her own. I don’t hold it against her. Today, my Virgo moon makes me sooo anxious and worrisome. I definitely see the negative qualities it brings but the good qualities out weigh them. I love buying people gifts and I'm a great gift giver if I do say so myself. With my Capricorn rising and Virgo moon, I hate PDA and it can be hard for me to be lovey dovey (even with all my Leo), so I show love by buying gifts - kind of like my dad. My parents were never there for me emotionally but they bought me great gifts hahaha, I guess that's why. Also I tend to "mother" my partners; I do their laundry, do the cleaning, make their doctor appointments, and take care of them in a sense - like my mom did for me. Writing this out I can now see why I am the way I am lol.

Moon square Jupiter, Pluto, and Saturn:

Ooooff. Well I won't dive into it too much. I will say it affects my mental health greatly and I've had a lot of trouble in that department. My Moon square Jupiter really makes my moods go up and down. Like high highs and low lows for sure. I try to look at it positively even though it's hard sometimes. Having the high highs brings out my inner child (Jupiter in the 5th). When I'm happy I'm really happy and giggling and silly. And of course the flip side is low low :( But I like the high highs so I deal. Also with this, I tend to avoid being sad at all costs. All costs. I'm a true escape artist when it comes to emotions. With Pluto and Saturn squaring my Moon, I am infact a MOODY BITCH. LOL, hey at least I can admit it. It brings intrusive thoughts, obsessive thinking, insecurity, and guilt with it too - all that great stuff. Moving on.

Cancer Mercury:

I like my Cancer Mercury a lot, even though it's paired with my all my Leo placements which can make me a ~smidge~ dramatic. I wasn't the best student in high school but I did take the hardest English courses they offered, which in hindsight saved my GPA lol. In college, I studied English with a concentration in creative writing. I mostly wrote and studied poetry which I loved so much. I'm a great listener and if I could write an advice column I would. I love how my Cancer Mercury makes me empathetic and how I'm able to put myself in anyone's shoes. One negative about this placement is that I get hurt easily (paired with Leo Sun and Virgo Moon esp), but I won't let you know I'm hurt, I'll just get angry and mean. I don't like that about myself and I wish I was more vulnerable in that aspect but it's easier to be angry than sad... right?

Leo Venus and Mars:

After talking about all the above placements, my Leo side is definitely my ray of sunshine in a way. I feel like with my Virgo Moon and the aspects it makes, it kinda settles my Leo ego. That's not to say I don't have an ego, I definitely do... just look at this post it's all about meee :) I have pictures of when I was 3-6 years old and flexing my muscles hahaha and I thought I was so strong I would go around and show everyone that I could pick my mom and older sister up. So weird. Other than that, when I dislike someone I tend to go on rant for awhile about everything I dislike about them. My least favorite thing is when someone makes me feel inferior or small, that will put me on 10 easily. I don't get mad all that much, it takes a lot but when I do get mad, I see red. Maybe cause I have Mars at 0 degrees. I do get over things quickly though, emotionally anyway, but I do hold a grudge. Also yesss, I have Leo hair. It's long and thick and hard to manage. Growing up, my mom would never let me color or cut it and I'm kinda glad now looking back on it.

8th house Moon & Venus:

This is why I hold grudges hahaha. In my opinion, the 8th house can be hard to understand/put into words until you experience it (in synastry, transit, natal, etc), then you just know. With Venus here, every person I'm romantically involved with transforms me but also takes a piece of me as well. In my experience with the 8th house, you can gain a lot of good things but it comes with a price. Whether its a mix of my placements or just these placements specifically, love really hurts! Break ups have put me in dark dark places. When I do love someone, I want to merge with them, like become "one" if that makes sense. So when it comes to an end, I have a huge hole left. In my life, this has manifested as when I ran away from home to a different state and ghosted my family and friends just to get back together with my boyfriend, all on a whim. I'd give it all up for someone I love. With Virgo Moon being in my 8th house, my anxiety mixes with my obsessive behavior which manifests as dermotillamania. I struggle with it so bad. I'm working on it but yeah that's kinda interesting looking from an astrological sense. Moon in the 8th house gives me great intuition though... I'm always right about the vibes. But this comes at the cost of feeling things extremely deeply.

Scorpio MC:

This is another placement that I like about my chart because my Capricorn rising makes me come off as intimidating and my MC makes people see me as powerful and mysterious. I don't know if people actually see me this way but even it being a possibility gives me like Olivia Benson vibes. I love her. Anyway, one thing I will say is I don't have social media anymore and haven't for years (besides Tumblr and Reddit) because I really value my privacy. I don't like people knowing things about me unless I decide to share it with them, even small things. Tumblr and Reddit are okay in my mind because I don't know anyone in real life. But even this post I'm already thinking of deleting and I haven't even posted it yet lol. When I did have social media, I would overshare and then delete the post an hour later. I was always deleting pictures and revamping my aesthetic. I became obsessed with likes and comments and scrolling that it was too much and I didn't like the power it had over me. Something else that I think manifests from my MC is that I love psychology, astrology, and things that tie into personalities.

5th house Jupiter & Saturn:

It always confused me on how to interpret having Saturn, the planet of limitations and responsibility, and Jupiter, the planet of expansion and luck, in the same house. I thought that they canceled each other out in a way, or level each other out... is a better way of putting it.  I actually messaged @astrosky33 and asked how they interpret it. Her (?) answer was interesting and made a lot of sense. Jupiter and Saturn in the same house gives off both energies at the same time (why didn't I think of that? lol). So for the 5th house, in terms of my hypothetical kids, I would be a parent that has fun and is silly but also strict in some ways and responsible. One way Saturn in my 5th house manifests is that I don't want to do anything creative unless I feel it's productive in some way, which I don't like about myself. Meaning, I don't want to read a book if the genre is fantasy, I would rather read non-fiction or a self help book; something that I can learn from. Also, I really like hobbies where I can produce something, like making candles or making spell jars. If I can make money from a hobby that I love then even better. Jupiter in the 5th house manifests as being child-like and also loving kids. If things are going well and I'm happy, then I can be excited and goofy like a child. If things aren't going well, then I can throw a tantrum like a child. I love kids because my early childhood was the best time of my life before life hit me upside the head (lol). This past Halloween, I made goodie bags for the trick or treaters and got so excited when the doorbell rang. I don't know, I just want to protect kids and shield them from the bad in the world. Kids, out of everyone, deserve to be happy.

Sun sextile Jupiter:

Things tend to work out for me, well, as of lately anyway. I struggled a lot growing up and I was always wishing my life were different. I couldn't wait to leave home. Now, I have a boyfriend who I love very much and we live very comfortably. I have a great job and I am so much happier than I was before. Of course, life isn't always perfect and there are problems at every turn. I wish I could go back in time and tell 15 year old me that everything is going to be okay, more than okay actually. I have a dog and two kittens who I love very much and I'm very fortunate to have the life that I do. I try to stay positive because there's no point in being negative and sulking all the time. Plus, you never know what can happen so be thankful for what you have, even if in your eyes, it isn't enough. I believe in being nice to people, you never know how far one act of kindness can go. Lord knows I needed it during some pretty tough times in my life.

Venus square Saturn (TW: Eating disorder, drug use, phobias):

Going back to having fear of abandonment and being uncomfortable with PDA... well here is the culprit. Or some of the culprit. Since Venus is in my 8th house, I feel like this aspect plays into my fear of my family dying, more specifically, my parents. Whenever I visit home and I see they look a little older, move a little slower, I get really sad. Their birthdays are supposed to be for celebrating but I can't help but get sad. It takes over me and I obsess about what I'm going to do when the day comes and they're not here anymore. I put on a brave face though and I buy them nice gifts and send flowers on holidays... but it's always in the back of my mind. This aspect also manifests as having low self esteem and growing up this was very prevalent. I didn't care about myself at all; I did drugs, I put myself into bad situations that I get anxiety just thinking about what could've happened. I had an eating disorder, dated boys that were awful. I'm fortunate that I made it out okay. I still have insecurities today but during that time in my life it was so intense because even as a teen without this aspect, you deal with insecurities. It was like double trouble.  

If you read this far, thank you. I hope it was semi-interesting and Im really curious to know what you guys think. Should I make a part 2? I’m feeling a little “out there” by posting this so I hope it's not too much. Thanks again for taking the time to read this.

(let me know what you think!)

[sseniita]

your mom

please read!!!

The villain’s first thought took him by surprise. 

Those are her eyes. 

The child must have been one or two years away from high school, and yet her round cheeks and the way she played with the hem of her sleeves could have said otherwise. The villain didn’t recognize where the young girl’s dark brown hair or freckles came from- surely the hero didn’t have freckles? Did she? A surge of panic ran through the villain as the features of the hero’s face became warped and foggy in his mind.

“Absolutely not.” He said. The child pouted in response, flashing him a weak and pathetic mockery of the hero’s puppy eyes. 

That’s her face, you faker. 

“This isn’t fair.” 

“Nothing is fair. Go home.” 

The villain had noticed someone was tailing him recently, he had assumed some amateur journalist or paparazzi (no difference, really) was the culprit before she made herself known by sneaking in with his cleaning crew into his office. Hero’s daughter was kept as a strict secret, as far as he knew only himself and the child’s late grandmother knew about her.  

“You have to help me.”

“And why’s that?” It was getting harder and harder to be civil with the trespassing child. 

“Mom said you’d help me!” 

The villain’s neck was beginning to strain looking down at her. 

“The hero was an optimist. She saw and felt things that were never there. Any sense of camaraderie you think we had didn’t ever exist.” He didn’t mean to sneer, it simply came out that way.  

The child laughed, a sarcastic, exhausted thing. She sounded like her too. 

“You would have never known about me if that were true.” 

“She could never keep a secret. Always jumpy. It took less than lazy observation to know.” 

The villain, in fact, knew from the moment she was born. He was there. The hero had been conveniently taken hostage by the villain for five months right when she started showing and three months after for recovery, he hadn’t seen the child since. The villain wouldn’t ever admit it, but they were eight months of pure bliss. The hero’s pregnancy was pleasant, she handled it very well up until her last month when she needed the villain for every menial task. After abandoning her abusive diet and workout schedule she finally gained some healthy weight (although lost most of it a month into heroism) and began to sleep a much needed eight hours a night. For the first time since they met, she went back to being a shiny and sparkling thing, all smiles and rosy cheeks, pure indulgence and excitement. 

The villain almost caught himself smiling at the memories before his gaze focussed back on the tiny monster in his office.

“Go home.”

“I can’t.” She said, copying his own demanding tone; slight pauses between words, emphasis on the important parts. “I have nowhere to go, the house was taken over by some people wanting to make it some messed up Hero museum. Grandma passed away, no one even knows I exist, and there is no way in hell I’m going back to the orphanage” She rummaged through the duffle at her side, the villain assumed it contained everything she owned. She pulled out a beige card with the hero’s writing in blue ink. 

As the villain read, the child blabbered. 

“You guys were friends, and I don’t believe you killed her like the news says. Mom talked about you all the time! She mentioned that she trusted you over and over again. You have to help me!” 

The villain couldn’t tell who the card was addressed to. It wasn’t signed to anyone and spoke ambiguously about love and trust and other disgusting things, the girl had assumed the card was supposed to be for him. The villain, albeit embarrassingly, wanted to believe that. 

“This isn’t for me.” 

“Of course it was!” 

“She’d never speak like this. Especially to me.” 

“Well I certainly have no use for it. My mom loved me. I don’t need a lousy card to know it. She knew that too. But I don’t think she was brave enough to ever tell you-”

“You shouldn’t speak about things you know nothing about.” This, he hoped, was laced with venom. 

“I dunno Mr. Doom and Gloom, you didn’t have to hear her go on and on about a secret crush she had rooftop fights with.” 

Dear lord, Hero. I don’t know whether to be angry at you for not saying something, or at myself for never noticing. 

He recognized how immature and childish his hope was. The only woman he’d ever loved was dead, and hearing now they had the illusion of a chance from her very own daughter was a worse heartbreak than if she just rejected him outright. 

They always had a weird relationship. A complex, fluttering thing that consisted of fistfights (regardless of powers; the villain considered it intimate, the hero considered it sexy), partnerships of planning and scheming, and being public representations of compliance and deviancy, the good and the dirty, love and hate. 

Somewhere along the line it had become late nights at diners, comfort in close proximity, a head on a shoulder, a hand on the back. The flirting, the teasing, the stares. The all-holy casual hookups.

The villain knew he was screwed when she came to his apartment late at night, drenched by the rain, mascara running down her cheeks. 

Villain, I need your help. I’m pregnant. 

The timing revealed Hero’s fling, it had been months after a fight that led them to ‘strict fighting terms’ it all broke down as fast as hero did in the villain’s arms. 

But she was gone now, buried in a government cemetery surrounded by hundreds of now wilting bouquets and dusty gifts. And yet, the innocent joy of reciprocation flushed through his body. He allowed himself one more denial. Just to be safe. 

“Perhaps it was for your father.” The child laughed at this, more genuine amusement than it was self deprecating, the villain didn’t blame her. He knew from the second he said it how stupid it sounded. 

“Good one. Anyways. Help me kill Supervillain.” 

Dejectedly, the villain plopped down at his desk chair, signalling the young girl to do the same on the chair across the desk. The girl happily obliged. “Here’s what I’m thinking, we disguise ourselves as post office men-”

“Wait wait wait. Be quiet for five seconds.” The villain found himself massaging his temples. “Your mother wanted one thing for you. And that explicitly included staying out of the business. I’ll get you a room with someone I trust. Lie low for now, I’ll send you off to a boarding school or something until you turn eighteen.” 

“What? No! I want to help you bring down the supervillain.” 

“Trust me, I can do that myself. You need to go back to the orphanage.” 

“I hate it there! I have things to do! I need to avenge my mom and that means killing the supervillain myself.” 

The villain was beginning to wonder if the child was a clone rather than a daughter. Perhaps the brown hair was just box dye. She had an edge she’d only seen in his hero, a bright star deep in the colour of her eyes, an unmatched amount of life inside her. The hero had passed away a little over two months ago and her daughter was immediately on the run. She must have known how important it was to stay hidden. When was the last time she had a full sleep? 

“Look, Lily, I get it. But your mother will rise from her grave if she knew I got you hurt.” The villain ignored the shock on the girl’s face at the mention of her name. 

Your mom wouldn’t stop talking about me, well I guess we were on the same boat then. 

"Even better, I think." She joked. Of course only your daughter would joke at a time like this.

“You need time. You need to rest. I can offer you safety. I can promise you that when the time comes to kill Supervillain, it’ll be done as far away from you as possible. Your mother would never forgive you if you ever even touched the handle of a gun. Please, at least give her that.” 

Lily was her mother’s spitting image. Her curls didn’t hold without product, her big brown eyes hid underneath long lashes. Her cheeks would stay round well into adulthood, and they both picked nervously at their nails. But when she finally lifted her head and her eyes met the villain’s eyes, he swore he saw a glimpse of himself in them. 

“Make it slow.” 

The villain smiled. 

“Naturally.”

[wackpedion]

My Analysis of MSI's Royally Fucked

This is going to be a look into Mindless Self Indulgence's song Royally Fucked through the lense of it being about csa (child sexual abuse), if such themes are uncomfortable or triggering this may not be for you

before I begin, I will note that I will be using they/them pronouns to refer to the perspective presented in the song. This is because I don't know if Jimmy Urine is a victim of csa, I don't think he's ever commented on it and for all I know this is a song simply in the perspective/character of someone who did experience it, and its frankly not my business to speculate on his personal life and so I am keeping it ambigious when talking about the views expressed in this song.

Now let us begin, starting with the first verse:

They start off with cursing out some unnamed figure (likely their abuser), right off the bat painting a negative and hateful picture. And then there is the next line, which I think is very significant in setting the tone for the song

"Mom, Dad, why don't you finger me too?" Always sticks out to me when listening to the song, for how gross weird and especially overt it is. To me I think it signals a warped mindset they have from past abuse, that a similiar trusted adult authority figure has hurt them in the past and so such thoughts come to mind. If such a person has done something like that to them, why wouldn't there parents? It wouldn't be so abnormal or shocking.

Then follows the chorus, which is quite self deprecating.

The "I will never be young" line I think refers to how, as a child they never really got to be a child because of the abuse and trauma they suffered through, this is especially relevant to csa in where victims are subjected to adult things, and often told or made to feel more 'adult' (e.g. "you're so mature for your age"). And now having grown up to be an adult that window of time to be a child is closed and gone forever. They will never get to be young.

"I will never be loved" is a self deprecating thought that often derives from low self esteem, which is common among abuse victims. It is then followed by "I will never be wrong", which is a statement in relation to the past lines, stating that they won't or dont think these statements will be proven wrong. They won't ever be young, and they won't ever be loved, and they're not wrong for thinking that.

"I am royally fucked" refers to how they're fucked in the head from the abuse and trauma, and also how their current life is a mess because of the complications from all of that.

Onto verse two, it starts off with "love it, love it, love it, love it, you son of a bitch". To me it sounds like it's about how the perpretator took pleasure in the victims abuse, and how they hold further resentment for them for that.

Now this is where it gets interesting, "All of them dead now, let me be the same". I believe this has a sort of double meaning. For one the more literal one, in that the people who hurt and aided in their abuse are dead now, and they wish to die too. Suicidal feelings are common among victims of abuse. However I interpret this to be a sort of metaphor of sorts for moving on.

"All of them dead now" being that these people are gone, and they got to move on from what happened. Whether it be the more literal interpretation in that they got to leave what happened behind in/through death, or simply being gone and removed from the victims life and not having to suffer consequences for what happened, being as good as dead. The victim wants to be able to move past what happened too, "let me be the same", but is unable to, as shown by the line "fall on my knees" which invokes imagery of a broken down, vulnerable weak person.

The chorus follows and then there is this bridge

"Don't let them see me now, don't let them see me like this" expressing that they don't want anyone to see them as they are being now in the song, broken down and vulnerable. After this a final round of the chorus plays, reiterating their self deprecating thoughts.

And that concludes my analysis, I have been listening to this song on loop for several days and I wanted to put my thoughts down to share.

Some tags for the people who expressed interest in seeing my interpretation/analysis:

@ilovebeatingmywife @sourbombz @shinigamichan @infinitebearrreblogz @msi-obsessive

[blacklegsanjiii]

I’m rolling around in my head that loved!Sanji post of yours where it’s the vinsmoke grandpa messing with everything and not judge … so very hard

Mostly thinking about how Sanji would end up feeling about everything at the end of the day. His family comes back into his life after him being away from them for all of his teenage and adult years, and his brothers are different. They feel. They’re, somehow, excited to see him. That’s a good thing, no? They’re no longer unfeeling weapons.

But that doesn’t really change what they did to him at all. They’re still the people that beat and abused him at every possible opportunity, that put him into some of the worst states he’s ever been in. That doesn’t suddenly go away now that they’ve been fixed by their father and given a normal emotional range. That alone isn’t a resolution.

I can’t help but feel he’d end up quite conflicted about it, at least at first. Thoughts?

You're not wrong. Sanji, who Ichiji kidnapped, being held and scolded by Ichiji. Not like when they were kids because it is so full of kindness and worry it makes Sanji reel. Yonji who uses his hands to wrench Sanji to him and hold him and excitedly tell him all the rebuilding Germa has been doing to the world, changing from a conquering kingdom to a kind one. Reiju chastising them and apologizing to Sanji for them as Niji takes his turn hugging Sanji.

Sanji has to have a complete meltdown over it, in front of them and Judge. Just gripping his hair and screaming with his legs on fire. How much they hurt him, how he was just ripped away from his crew. If they think everything is suddenly fixed they're wrong. Sanji has a full blown panic attack and Judge has to ground him and console his son like he used to.

Maybe that makes his siblings realize how fucked they made. The death grip he has on his hair, how much smaller than everyone else he is because they helped starve him. Imagine if a bug lands on him and the absolute horror on his face. Just everything they've done and they all apologize to him individually. Take their time and truly mean it. Sanji is trying to understand they've changed, he is trying but fuck how much they hurt him when they were little.

Luffy absolutely punches Ichiji for stealing Sanji and then Luffy sees how Sanji is doing and is all over him with Nami and the rescue team. Luffy demands to know why they took his cook and Yonji says he's their brother and they haven't seen him and they got too wound up over him coming home. Luffy is like 'his home is the Sunny, not whatever this is!' and Sanji is trying to calm Luffy down and Nami yells at him for his self sacrificial tendencies and leaving his boyfriend like that.

The Vinsmokes dealing with that as Judge nods and says Luffy is right, they had no right to bring Sanji to Germa, this hasn't been his home since he was a child and even then it hardly was. They send them off as Big Mom starts attacking, saying Germa will deal with the brunt of it. What's important is Sanji is with his family as and he is given the canister. Sanji may never view his siblings as family again and that's his right. Reconciliation can take years and he knows his father loves him, that has never changed and never will.

[ideasarestuckinmyhead]

Is it bad that I crave your writting for Boo's childhood/backstory(including teen years, that shit gets crazy) just pack with layers upon layers upon layers upon layers upon layers of gut wrenching and sole crushing angst?

And Boo is telling Al and Seth all of this horrific tragic story and at the end of it they're just sitting there like:

"Sugerboo, wtaf?!"

lol don't mind me, just need to feel things tonight! And by that I mean pain! 🥲

-🪷 anon

Fucked life.

TW: Drug use, gambling, bad parents, domestic abuse (won't go into it), manipulation, shitty childhood and in all just wow. If I write anything wrong please tell me!

‼️This is just for the ask not giving Boo an actual background.‼️

"My childhood was of drugs, screaming, and fighting behind walls." Sipping the alcohol in the cup they got. Sugarboo leaned back on the chair they were in, nonchalant about what they just said. The boys were silent waiting for them to continue, not to disturb the comfortable flow they got themselves in.

"My dad wasn't and still ISN'T a good man. He would beat my mom, screaming at her why did she give birth to a defect of a kid. One that couldn't even shut the fuck up when he was mad." Hissing out Sugarboo grabbed the cup a bit tight. Seth felt his hands clench, and Alphonse looked ready to kill someone.

"But my mom wasn't a Saint either in this shit. She'd be like 'I took that beating for you and you can't even try to better yourself? What kind of child doesn't try for their mother?' She'd also say that me giving her money for her drug abuse would help her." Looking into the flames of the camp fire Sugarboo got lost in thought. Memories of needles and white powder on the table flashing through their mind.

"I had to lie to cps so, so many fucking times. Saying my mother was just tired because she worked two jobs, which she did. But got fired every time because she kept stealing food from the kitchen and taking alcohol from the gas station she worked at." Chugging the rest of their alcohol they reached over and grabbed a bottle of whatever. Cracking it open they didn't want to look at the stares of pity drilling on the back of their head.

"After my dad finally cracked and left my mom because of her drug addiction he took all the money we had. I was uumm, 16? Had a job at this Cafe in the city we lived in. The owner was this old man that knew what my mom did." Smiling solemnly SB thought back on that man. He was the father figure they needed desperately, he was a short Mexican man in his late 40's.

"Francisco, let me stay at the Cafe if I needed too. Made sure to squirrel away money for me so I can get away from my druggie mom....." Whispering SB wiped some tears that fell. It was hard talking about this shit, how their live was a mess and now they can't really talk about it. Not without the looks of pity.

"My mom found out when Francisco was talking to another coworker of mine. About how it was almost $200 dollars saved up for me. I've told him as soon as I graduated I was skipping to a different town. I wanted to be a baker, but my mom told me I needed a real job." Hissing out the last bit Sugarboo chugged the rest of the second cup. Starting their third as they slurred out more words.

"The bitch tried to hurt him! I never....got so fucking angry before. I grabbed a bottle and smashed it over her head. My mom didn't like that, so she, who was on a withdrawal of two days, began choking me." Moving their collar, flashing the scar they got from her nails. Alphonse remember asking about them before, Boo just shook their head and said 'For another time.' He felt like shit asking about it now.

"Francisco, worried grabbed a gun he had incase of a robber....shot her. There was witnesses and everything, so he wasn't charged. It was ruled as self defense. But I didn't have anywhere to go, as shitty as it was I had to be pit in a foster home." More tears pooled in their eyes as they left them fall. They wanted to stay with Francisco, but the Judge's words were final.

"I still worked there at the Cafe. But I wanted to stay with him! My Foster parents were nice I guess but they didn't get me. Mostly left me alone because I was older." There was older kids there but, SB didn't make friends with them. It was clear they didn't want another teenager with them.

"When it was the summer before or was it after? I turned 18....Francisco, he....he died." Sobbing out Seth and Alphonse got up. Each boy holding a hand as Sugarboo curled into themselves and cried.

"He left me everything. His grandchildren tried to get shit from me but they couldn't. They never tried and connect with him, even though he tried so desperately. I didn't budge or nothing I told them to suck my dick and kept the promise I had with Francisco. To run and live my life. How I wanted it, no shitty dad's, my druggie mom was dead and I was 18 with $24,000 dollars that Francisco left for me." Sitting up proud Sugarboo laughed as they remembered the old man telling them they better do good with he money. How he wanted them to be better than their parents, to use the hate they build up to make it useful.

"And here I am now! My own bakery in a small town that loves my goods. And two amazing men in my life! So yeah I'd think I'm living my life right now." Smiling at the two men who were still silent. Sugarboo got smiles back as all three hugged, this was nice.

"Boo, holy shit." Was the inky words they got as a response. Laughing at that Boo leaned to Alphonse and gave him a kiss. He always did have comedic timing.

"Sugar, I'm glad we got to meet you. And I'm glad you stayed strong through out all of this." The sad eyed man had tears saying those words. Sugarboo started frowning as they wiped his tears softly.

"Awe, don't cry hon..." Whispering as Seth was being held by them. Alphonse started crying too, wishing he meet then sooner to help them. But they can't change the past, it's already done.

"Wanna make stores and drink this night away?" Giving a cheeky grin Sugarboo held up their cup. Seth gave a watery laugh as he sat back up and nodded.

Alphonse cracked open another bottle of the disgusting sugary drink he had. And the three began drinking, telling happy memories they held close to their hearts. Stories made them stronger, helping them better understand where one of the trio was.

Sugarboo, for a moment paused looking at Seth and Alphonse argue over who won the wresting match when younger. And they started giggling like a maniac seeing their boys being so....them. Even after what they told the boys they still wanted them.

[doberbutts]

I just wanted to say thank you for the post about the safety precautions video. I take a lot of similar precautions (I have the same portable door lock) because of my PTSD and OCD and the fact my abuser knows where I live. I even have an emergency escape plan out a window and onto the roof! I live in a really poor area with a lot of violence, there's been three murders on this street in the last couple years and our cars been vandalised recently. I know what people are *trying* to make a point about in that post, but it does make me feel bad seeing such overt mocking. So I really appreciate you pointing out so much of this can also come from genuine trauma not just "watching too much true crime"! I hope you have a good day 💖

Yeah it's always obvious to me that the folks who think some of this stuff is silly or overkill have never really lived through a situation where that could have been a life or death thing. Which, honestly, that's great for them! I wish everyone could live somewhere that they did not have to fear break-ins and active threats on their lives! But that's also unfortunately not where everyone lives and that does include white people (although the point about it being weaponized unfairly against people of color, poor people, and disabled people, the populations that are the most at risk of this type of violence, is also extremely valid)

It's similar to my discussion about weapons, arming yourself, and self-defense. It is all good to say that most people in this country will never actually need to defend themselves from this type of harm. It's also untrue to say that it never happens, because it has happened to me, it has happened to my friends, and it has happened to people I know even only tangentially.

I have a doberman in part because I want a dog that has a fairly decent chance of biting the fuck out of someone who breaks in to hurt me. I carry a weapon everywhere and I took a fairly serious self-defense class. Why? Because when I was in college, a drunk man repeatedly tried to break in while I was sleeping and I have no idea if he would have hurt me if that door had actually opened. My parents' house was broken into while we were home when I was still a child, and my sister was sitting only a few feet from the door when it swung open. Between her scream and our dog coming barreling down the stairs at him, he chose to flee, but what if he hadn't? What if she'd been in bed like the rest of us were, away from the door? What if we hadn't had the dog, or if she hadn't heard my sister and come charging in ready to defend her family?

Someone broke into my mom's dorm when she was in college and stood next to her bed touching himself. He did not ever touch her, and she reported it the next morning, after laying awake frozen in fear all night about what could have happened. Multiple someones broke into my aunt's dorm at a completely different college and did touch her, for hours, and she was found the next morning as a beaten and bloody whimpering mess. My aunt has severe PTSD and was diagnosed with schizophrenia shortly after. She never had symptoms before, but now she sees those men everywhere she goes. My other sister was beaten to a bloody pulp by her former partner and spent many years looking over her shoulder expecting to see him reappear. My dad was shot in the arm just walking down the street from his mom's house to his school due to gang violence and watched a man die on the same block as his mama's doorstep, and now has a ritual every night of checking each and every door and window despite living more than two hours away from that neighborhood 40 years later.

I am glad that so many people have never had to consider protecting themselves from this kind of violence. I am glad that the crime statistics say that this type of violence is becoming more and more uncommon. I am still going to lock my house up and install security measures and keep a weapon on me and know how to defend myself with it and teach my dog to bite the fuck out of anyone who walks through that door. Mostly because I remember being a terrified teenager holding the hammer out of my toolbox to my chest and staring at my fire escape door until the banging stopped at 3 AM.

[aihoshiino]

After reading the latest chapter, I found it intriguing that right after the panel where Ayumi says that "Back then, Ai was 8 or 9", the next panel has her state that "Ai had grown up to be a woman", despite her being still just a child. No one would call someone that age a grown woman. It's seems like she didn't view her daughter as a child at all (and neither did her creep of a boyfriend) and only saw her as some sort of love rival who's an adult like her even when she wasn't. Ai's mom clearly wasn't fit to be a mother at all since a good mother would've broke up with her boyfriend instead. And even in the way she speaks of herself in this chapter, it's as if she wants Aqua (and the readers) to feel sympathetic. Ayumi truly is an awfully selfish woman and unfortunately she had to be Ai's mother.

anon i literally woke up this morning cooking ayumi meta on exactly this topic in my head and then logged on to see this ask....... you and i shall have a spring wedding

That said, you're right on the money. What I loved so much about the writing of this scene is how intensely real Ayumi feels as a toxic mother. I feel like a lot of people were kind of expecting her to be this over the top cackling Mother Gothel type but like I said in my ch 131 initial writeup, the unfortunate reality is that this is how a lot of abusers look. Like normal ass, regular, pathetic people.

In particular, I really love how deep of an understanding we get of Ayumi's messed up, contradictory headspace just over the course of the four pages we spend with her. She recognizes that she did something terrible and hates herself, but she has surrendered to this sort of self-enforced helplessness with regard to her own issues and fucked up behaviours. She knows that she needs to improve but is self-defeating about her ability to do so and the whole thing turns into a self fulfilling prophecy where she refuses to put in the work because she believes she can't change to begin with but BECAUSE she doesn't put in the work, nothing changes, which reinforces her belief that she can't fix anything so she doesn't try and... you see how the snake starts eating its own tail?

At the same time, though, this surrendering to helplessness is a safety net for her as much as it is a mental trap. By framing her behaviour as something she is powerless to resist or to stop, she essentially frees herself of agency in Ai's abuse and neglect. Being violent towards her daughter is not something she frames as an active choice, but as something she would "wind up" doing, as if by accident or compelled by forces completely out of her control. Not only that, but it allows her to rewrite the narrative for herself with regards to her abandonment of Ai – since she is so helpless to stop her abuse of Ai, the daughter she loves so much, she just had no choice but to stay away. But she was totally going to go pick her up someday, definitely! Never fucking mind that Ai was left there for so long that she aged out of the system before Ayumi ever came back.

It's once Aqua challenges this assertion, though, that the cracks start to form. Though even before that, an attentive reader will obviously have some red flags up – after all, if Ayumi loves her daughter as much as she says she did, then why does Ai describe herself as a person who has never been loved by anyone? At age twelve, no less? That is not even REMOTELY close to a thought a well adjusted and cared for kid should be able to express, let alone sincerely think.

There's always been a theme in Oshi no Ko of Ai being pulled in all directions, in trying to be everything that everybody asked her to be, succeeding and being punished for it anyway. In my CH131 thoughts, I coined the phrase 'adultification' to describe the way adult agency and expectations are enforced on children who are too young as a method of abuse, a direct inverse of the way infantilization happens to adults. Part of the impossible expectations enforced on Ai were having these twin opposing forces of adultification and infantalization inflicted on her in a truly maddening way.

Specific to adultification, though, we over and over see other characters inflict adult agency and sexuality on Ai way before the point that any reasonable person would rationally think to do so. When describing her falling in love, Kaburagi says that her face, which had been that of a child, "turned into a woman's" at a time that we know she can only have been fifteen at the oldest.

45510 seconds this, with the narrator describing how this adultification is inflicted on many young girls in the industry;

"At the time, younger age groups were all the rage, but girls in their formative years could undergo rapid changes as they matured. Once they outgrew that youthful phase, they were evaluated the same way as "ordinary" women."

... only to turn around and do the same thing to Ai:

"Right from the beginning, she exuded a maturity beyond her years, and in the end, she retained a fresh-faced, youthful allure."

With all that in mind, it's not at all a shock that this echoes all the way back in time to the starting point of Ayumi's abuse of Ai. It's reprehensible, but it's also unfortunately deeply real – it is heartbreakingly common for victims of CSA to be blamed for their abuse, as if being victimized by adults is something they have any agency in.

In this instance too, Ayumi distances herself from her own agency and culpability in Ai's abuse. Look at how she frames things and the issues that she centers; it isn't her own insecurity, toxicity and violence that ruined things. It was Ai's beauty. Ai growing into a woman. That she can say such a thing without blinking betrays so clearly that for all she insists she loved her daughter, Ai was never really a child to her. And the moment she realized Ai was attracting the attention of a man, Ayumi didn't see her as a child being victimized but as a woman posing a threat, a romantic and sexual rival who needed to be beaten back into line and shown her place. Even her anger at Ai's stepfather is so, so telling – the framing makes it clear that her anger is not that of a woman raging against someone who posed a threat to their child, but as a woman resenting a man who was unfaithful to her.

For all that she cries and self flagellates, Ayumi basically lays it all out in her own words without even meaning to. She doesn't take responsibility for her own actions, nor does she even really frame them as being central to the chain of abuse that destroyed not just her family but robbed Ai of her life. Even through her tears, she pushes Ai to the forefront while framing her abuse as a thing that just "ended up" happening, that she was powerless to stop. When talking to Aqua about how she can't make amends, the word she uses in the Japanese text is actually 贖罪 – Atonement, the same character used as the chapter's title.

But the thing about atonement is that you can't atone for a sin you don't take responsibility for. And Ayumi makes it heartbreakingly clear that for all her regrets and her pain, she has not come close to taking responsibility for the harm she inflicted on her daughter. And even if she did? It's too late. Ai is gone.

It's just as Akane says. There's nothing here anymore.

[ronniesinsanity]

Dean Winchester- One Shot

TW‼️- this post will mention; abuse, alcoholism, fighting, cursing and parental neglect

Dean lie awake in bed as tears streamed down his face. He felt like a failure. He messed up as a brother to Sam and a son to John. Though John had always told him he was a failure, it still bothered him deeply. He was never allowed to show his emotions in front of his father because it wasn’t “manly”. Nothing was ever good enough for him. He couldn’t be a child anymore, he had to grow up and take care of Sam. He was there for Sam, not John, HIM.

Dean was there for Sam whenever he needed his big brother. He had to be not only his brother, but also his mother and his father. He attended parent teacher conferences when Sam was in school. He made sure Sam had a roof over his head and food to eat. And if he was lucky enough, he’d have money for Sam to go on field trips when he’d stay in school long enough. Who bought Sam’s birthday presents? Dean did. Who bought Sam’s Christmas presents? DEAN DID. John had never done that for his “boys” that he so called “cared” about. Who also had to get temporary custody of their 14 year old brother so he wouldn’t be taken away? You guessed it DEAN WINCHESTER DID.

Sam had always gotten Dean some sort of Father’s Day present each year. He saw Dean as his older brother, but also his dad. When any of his schools would do their “Parents” Day, he’d always bring Dean in. He thought he was the coolest big brother ever, but unfortunately Sam never knew what would happen to Dean when he wasn’t around. He didn’t know the true evils that lie beneath John Winchester.

Dean would always stand up for his brother, he didn’t care how bad of a beating he’d get. As long as he knew Sam was safe, that’s all that mattered to him. Unfortunately Sam would witness some of this, but thankfully not all of it. Though he did remember when John had thrown Dean out of the house when it was pouring down rain and it was awfully cold outside.

John and Dean had gotten into a pretty heated argument that night. “Dean, for the last time, I am your father! You need to listen to me!” He said in an angry tone as he looked at his son. “Father? Father?! Are you fucking kidding me! You are not worthy of being called a father! You know who is a father though?! Me! I’m there for Sam more than you have ever been? Do you know the foods he likes? Or dislikes? Do you know his allergies? Do you know who his doctor and dentist are!? No you don’t do you! Cause you’re too busy going off and finding the thing that killed mom! Guess what, John you’re never going to find it! Can’t you accept that she’s gone and she’s never coming back?!” Dean snapped at his father. That really pissed John off. He made his way over to Dean and slapped him hard. “Don’t you DARE talk to me like that again, boy! What the hells wrong with you?! You know what? Get the fuck out of this room and away from me! I’ll send your ass back to Sonny’s if I have to!” He threatened. He had Dean sent there before snd he wasn’t scared to do it again. “Oh yeah?! Well maybe this time I’ll show him my “werewolf” marks and tell him the truth that my “father” is an abusive alcoholic!” He yelled as he looked at his dad angrily.

John soon walked past him, grabbing onto his arm tightly, and leading him to the door. He soon opened the door, throwing him out into the pouring cold rain. “YOU are NOT welcomed back into this room until you learn and understand not to talk back to your father!” John spoke before slamming the door and locking it. Dean was only 16 almost 17 when this happened. Who the hell does something like that to their own kid? Dean teared up as he looked at the ground. Why would his dad do something like this. As he pulled himself together, he made his way to the impala. Luckily, he knew how to pick lock the doors. Once he made it inside. He climbed into the backseat and shivered a bit. It was colder than all hell in there. He didn’t have his jacket so that made it worse, plus he was also wet.

Sam had tears in his eyes as he watched his father and brother fight. He hated when the two would fight. He also hated when Dean would leave him. He didn’t enjoy being with John at all. As he wiped his tears, he heard the rain start to pick up. He was worried about Dean being out there in the cold weather. An hour went by and he knew John would’ve drank himself to sleep by now. He grabbed a few blankets and quietly made his way to the door. Carefully, he unlocked it, going outside and quietly closing the door behind him. He soon bolted for the impala since he guessed that’s where Dean would be. Dean was lost in his thoughts as he looked out of the window. Soon, he saw a small figure approaching the car. Once the figure was close enough, he realized it was Sam. He quickly got up and opened the door, letting his little brother in. “Sammy, what the hell are you thinking? It’s pouring down rain.”

“I don’t care, I missed you. I wanted to make sure you’re okay.” Sam said as he soon climbed into the backseat with his older brother. “I brought you some blankets.” He spoke, looking over at Dean. “Sammy,” Dean said with a sigh. “You’re gonna make yourself sick like this. You didn’t have to do this. I’ll be okay.” Sam shook his head and hugged his brother tightly. “I don’t want you to leave me again..” he said in a sad tone. Dean looked confused as he held him close. “Sammy, you know I’m not going to leave you. Why would I do that? If anything, you’d be going along with me. You know that. I’d never leave you behind.” He reassured his younger brother. “But, dad said he’d send you away. I don’t want that, Dean!” Sam exclaimed as tears were streaming down his face.

“Oh Sammy…you don’t have to worry about that.” He spoke, shaking his head softly. “I promise as long as I’m around, you’ll always be safe with me. You won’t have to worry about a thing.” He reassured, covering his brother with the blankets he brought. “Now, you need to get some rest. I promise I won’t go anywhere.”

As Dean was remembering these awful memories, he hadn’t realized that Sam was in his room. Sam noticed his brother was hurting and it made him upset. He always hated seeing him like this. He made his way over to him, gently placing his hand on his shoulder. “Dean? Are you okay?” He asked worriedly. Dean jumped as he heard his brother’s voice. He quickly looked at him, wiping his eyes, and nodding. “Yeah, I’m fine, don’t worry, Sammy” he said as he faked a smile. Sam shook his head and hugged his brother tightly. “No you’re not, Dean. What’s going on? You know you can talk to me.”

Dean hugged him back, sighing sadly as he teared up once again. “I-I’m not a good enough brother for you, Sam..” he chocked out. “Dean, yes you are. You’ve been there for me my whole life. You’re more like a dad to me than ours ever was. I appreciate everything you’ve sacrificed for me. Don’t you dare say you’re not a good enough brother for me. You’ve done so much for me and I never take you for granted.” He reassured the other as he rubbed his back a little. “You were young when everything happened and you took me on as your responsibility. You knew you didn’t have to, but you did anyway. You made me the man I am today, Dean. John didn’t do that, you did. You stepped up when he stepped down. I don’t know anyone else who would do that for their brother. I love you, Dean and I’m always here for you. You became the man dad should’ve been. Mom would be so proud of you.”

Dean cried as he listened to him. He was right, he was better than John. He nodded as he wiped his tears again. “I love you too, Sammy. Thank you.” He sniffled.

“You’re welcome, how about you and I get some pie, ice cream, and whatever else you want. And we can rewatch Scooby Doo.” Sam suggested. Dean smiled at that, nodding softly. “Sounds good to me.” He replied. Sam smiled back, getting up, and helping his brother up. As he lead him to the door, he patted him on the back. “You’re a good brother and dad, Dean.” He said and the two were off on their way.

[tangledbea]

Why does everybody hate Cassandra’s arc in season 3?

Well, not literally everyone hates it. Lots of people think it's really good. I don't like to generalize and say that "everyone" feels a certain way about anything.

But what a lot of people don't like comes from a few different directions, often coming together in the center into a hot mess. I'll do my best to recall all the biggest complaints. (Under a readmore, because it's kind of long and I don't want to subject people to it if they don't want to see it.)

It's incredibly out of character for her to blindly trust a stranger who won't reveal their name to her. She mentions several times during the course of the series that she doesn't trust people (especially people she's only just met), but Zhan Tiri wouldn't even tell her who she was, and Cassandra just decided that what this strange ghost child in a weird and dangerous house had to say was more important that a friendship built over the course of a few years, even if that friendship was currently strained.

Her rancor was poorly sourced. There were legitimately several things Cassandra could have been mad about, even directed at Rapunzel. But being mad at Rapunzel for Gothel choosing to kidnap her and abandon Cassandra was an unsympathetic way to go. She sang a whole song about not wanting to be second best anymore, about always waiting for her time to shine. But that entire story beat was thrown out the window in the face of "I am Gothel's biological daughter". She had one (1) glorious line of, "I'm not taking orders from you anymore!" and then all of that was put to rest in favor of, "My mom abandoned me, so I'm going to blame the abuse victim that she kidnapped."

She kept talking about her destiny, but didn't seem to have any goals beyond "be first over Rapunzel." She never even said what it was her "destiny" to do or be. She wanted to take over Corona? And then what? It's not like this was some long-standing desire of hers. Which leads me to

Cassandra spend the majority of her life defining herself as strong-willed, distrustful, and thinking for herself. But they decided that Zhan Tiri could get into her head as easy as that and start full-on manipulating her from the word "go," and that we'd all just handwave it away and accept that Cassandra was doing villainous things because she was being manipulated. Well, nay, I say. Cassandra was an adult with her own mind, and manipulation isn't as instantaneous as that. They didn't even try to portray it like they did with Rapunzel and Sugracha as complete magical mind control. No, it was Cassandra being given choices and choosing the things that would benefit her and/or hurt other people over and over and over again. But we're supposed to be sympathetic towards her.

She assaulted and kidnapped people, attempting to kill Rapunzel or at very least leave her for dead multiple times, then was surprised to find out she was the villain. And honestly, that surprise does a lot to make me dislike her villain arc. I love me a villain who thrives off their villainy, who revels in it, like she did at the beginning of "Cassandra's Revenge." And even villains like that can be redeemed. But people who choose violence and revenge and hate and are then surprised that they're the villain don't impress me.

Her redemption was rushed, crammed into the last twenty minutes of the series - her realization and apology was literally given about a minute of time - and she only realized she was wrong when she lost. Up until the moment Zhan Tiri wrestled the Moonstone away from her, Cassandra was convinced that she was going to win the day. As soon as she was powerless, she was sorry. And then, she was forgiven by everyone because she was forgiven by Rapunzel.

And things that don't go on the list because enough people disagree with them, or because they don't exactly line up with "why we dislike her villain arc" but are still things that bug me, personally:

That Gothel was her mother at all. I hate that plot point. It's stupid, lazy, and makes no sense.

That her arm getting burned and disfigured was just... dropped as a plot point. We don't know if having the Moonstone was supposed to heal it, or if she'd sufficiently rehabilitated it on the road enough for it not really to bother her anymore, but the showrunner literally said that they decided it wasn't important anymore, so dropped it.

[jaeyongdx]

hello ❣️

hiiiii everyone! so excited to be w everyone on this opening night/day/whatsever time it may be for u...i am actually prewriting this intro because i'm bored on a thursday night and too excited about opening 🫣 but anyway!! i'm carly (she/her, 25+) and this is jaeyong aka my worst boy and problematic fave. you may have seen him (and/or me) around before, and if so, hello again 🥳 otherwise it's great to meet u and i'm so excited to plot and write with everyone! i'll do the normal intro shindig and ramble about him and offer some plot ideas under the cut, so please like this if you'd like to plot! i think i'm going to try to reach out to everyone individually so this may be completely unnecessary but still adjlkfksldf here's jaeyong's about page, and here's his playlist just for fun! 💕 (as a sidenote, i also rp @dxmiyoung! she's a sideblog so i can't follow back from her but she will have her own intro shortly)

ABOUT THE MOST ANNOYING MAN YOU'VE EVER MET JAEYONG

jaeyong is the older twin of @daeyongdx

he was born into a batshit crazy family (mutagen supremacists)

they were so desperate for their children to be powerful and wrestle power away from humans that they Trained Them from essentially birth

training methods were very abusive and also all consuming

they went to school and they trained and that was it

training did also involve classes for dancing and archery and gymnastics and fencing tho, which was about as fun as it got

any fun shit jaeyong did as a child he did by lying to his parents and/or sneaking out the latter of which rarely worked

manipulation and lying well and persuasion and making yourself look good in every situation was part of the training too btw. thanks mom

their mom has the ability to insert thoughts into people's minds and is very good at it, she can make them think they're their own

so she did it with her kids too to make sure they never Really questioned training

jaeyong was remarkably social and well-adjusted in school and public all things considered

class clown type that was good at everything when he actually tried aka the most infuriating person of all time no he never grew out of that part

he ended up getting into pinnacle at 18 and daeyong did not it was a bit of a mess

but daeyong was recruited for another program that was a great and important opportunity!

aka daeyong got sent to the labs to be part of a study on twins nepa was doing

once jaeyong gets into pinnacle his parents give him infinitely more freedom

jaeyong makes it through pinnacle thinking this whole time his brother is just busy with other training and that they'd see each other once they graduated

so once he becomes a d tier hero officially he's like hey when do i get to see my brother again

he asks the right people the right questions and gets some helpful nudges along the way for him to eventually find out The Truth

he utilizes those persuasion abilities to talk nepa into letting daeyong out and experimenting on him instead. thanks mom again

daeyong doesn't know why he was released

jaeyong goes to the lab three days a week after his normal d tier hero duties and he can't say a word about it to anyone or else nepa will lock them both in there for good

he's training to be an a tier hero and he hates it actually. he's like i went through the training i did for WHAT. to smile pretty at a press conference and maybe make a couple speeches. i want to change the world!!!

but he also realizes being an a tier hero will put him in the best position to accomplish his/his parents' goals so he's like ok Fine.

he has scary powers (unhealing, blood manipulation, power detection, twin telepathy) but he's hot and it would be good optics for someone "dangerous" to be A Hero to the public so that's why nepa did it

he doesn't have much free time but he's great at time management so u will still see him out doing stuff. he plays guitar in a band. still goes to dance lessons. loves 2 party. annoying. etc

PLOT IDEAS

jaeyong is a bit of a slut so! do with that as u will.

classmates, in regular school when they were younger or pinnacle

his dad is a taekwondo instructor and his mom is a teacher at the cram school so. former students of theirs could be interesting

jaeyong's grandparents are also NOT insane and do like. private lessons to help people learn to control their abilities (they ran a school for mutagens pre-district x) so students of theirs is also an option

Rivals/Enemies. this is not that hard. just be better than jaeyong at something he's supposed to be good at and it's over LMAO

people that think he's so annoying (correct) that he continues to pester anyway for some reason or another

someone that has a crush on him because he IS unfortunately charming. to some people. bitch doesn't really know how to care about anyone other than himself and daeyong so it'll probably be one-sided though

fans of his band? he loves that band tbh. he thinks in another life he was a rockstar

his unhealing ability works on scars and bones and illnesses, including mental illnesses - but those are complicated. i'd love to do something w this but i don't know what yet lajsdjlfksjdl

people with connections to the labs! jaeyong knows the truth of what happened to you and it takes everything in him to not tell you but his and his brothers' lives depend on it

people he is using for Something. he thinks pretending to be friends with you will benefit him in some way. almost definitely related to power and influence of some sort

his power detection ability is very fun to work with. if u have any powers that might distort reality and/or trick people, he'll know they're a mutagen ability, so i'd love to do stuff w that too!

fans of "gawi," his superhero identity. he's obviously not a celebrity yet bc he's just d tier but he is sometimes in the background of a-tier business because of his training and he would love to feel famous. lmfao. but he is very friendly and all over the place so it's possible for people to find him really cool

OK I THINK THIS IS ENOUGH i actually like brainstorming way more so 🫶 LET'S GO!!!!!

[xoxiu]

twinkle - ot7 x reader

chapter 02 table of contents masterlist

summary: she had just wanted attention, that’s why she kept texting the strange number, updating him on everything in her life. little did she know how dangerous this relationship actually was. it had been jimin’s idea to kidnap the girl, but the ability to travel across the world to actually do it had been all hoseok’s doing. convenient how some things work, right? they knew that they were destined to have their baby with them, whether she wanted it or not.

tags/warnings: kidnapping, forced age regression, spanking, noncon, mafia au, drug use, stockholm syndrome, caregiver!bts, little!reader, nonsexual, diapers, panic attacks, fluff and angst, sickfic, referenced child abuse, unrequited love

a/n: i wrote this fic in 2018 on ao3 and wattpad, but im putting it here for archival reasons ♡

Ophelia was awoken by the sound of a slamming door, followed by her mother's aggravated groan. Ophelia rolled over and checked her phone; it was five in the morning, one hour before her alarm went off. She closed her eyes and willed herself to get that extra hour of sleep in, but the sounds of her mother's rage downstairs kept her awake. With a groan, she got out of bed, put on her slippers, and pocketed her phone.

Her mom looked like a mess; most likely hungover and wanting to get drunk again. As soon as she noticed her daughter coming down the stairs, she headed towards the front door. 

"I'm going out. Watch Rose." 

"But I have to go to school-"

"What did I just say?" Her mom yelled, turning around and walking towards the girl. She violently poked Ophelia's chest before going on. "Watch Rose. I don't care where the fuck you go but take her with. Or don't. Go to school and leave her to die, I don't care."

Ophelia watched wide-eyed as her mother followed her husband's footsteps and violently slammed the front door. Soon after, Rose began crying from the nursery. Ophelia quickly ran towards the baby, trying to quiet her before Henry woke up.

Ophelia picked the crying baby up, rocking and shushing her. The infant immediately quieted once she was in her older sister's arms, cooing instead of crying. Ophelia looked around the nursery and realized Rose's formula was not in the room. Really nothing was in the nursery- only the crib and changing table. Grabbing the small pink pacifier out of the crib, Ophelia placed it in the baby's mouth before heading back downstairs towards the kitchen. She sat Rose down in her highchair before looking for the formula. 

The bottle had just been made when Ophelia felt her pocket vibrate. She set the bottle down in front of Rose, who began making grabby hands towards the item just out of reach, and quickly checked her phone. It was just a text from Ian, nothing too important, so Ophelia began feeding Rose before picking up her phone with her free hand. 

'What are you up to?'

'not school. shit went down but im sure you dont want to hear about it'  Ophelia sent back. She didn't want to burden him with her problems.

'Why aren't you going to school? What happened?'

Ophelia didn't feel like typing everything out while also trying to keep the formula going into Rose's mouth, so she sat the phone down on the high chair table and used the talk-to-text feature.

"My mom and dad got into a fight this morning," Rose's eyes lit up at hearing her older sister's voice, making Ophelia smile. "My dad left and then my mom told me to stay home to watch the baby and then she left. I don't know when they'll be coming back but I'm taking Henry to school in a few hours." Ophelia looked over the text, verifying its correctness since she did have a small accent that caused distorted transcripts. After fixing small mistakes, she sent the text.

She didn't get an immediate reply, so she turned her attention back to Rose. She had finished the bottle and was laughing and gurgling in the high chair. Ophelia smiled and put the bottle on the edge of the sink to be cleaned. Picking Rose back up, she burped her as she walked into the living room. She dragged the baby bouncer into the kitchen, humming a song to soothe the restless baby. Ophelia placed Rose into her bouncer, turning on the little musical toy that had been in there with her. 

"Wanna watch sissy burn Henry's breakfast?" Rose squealed in response.

For not knowing how to cook a perfect 4-star breakfast, Ophelia felt she did well. She had burnt the first batch of toast but scraped the burnt pieces into the trash. Her brother was the pickiest eater, but what he doesn't know wouldn't hurt him. It had been 6:30 now, and Ophelia figured she should wake Henry up now so he'd have time to eat breakfast. She picked Rose back up- she had major issues leaving the baby alone even for a minute, unlike the baby's actual mother- and headed towards the boy's room.

"Henry, wake up, it's time for school," The older girl shook him awake with her free hand. The eleven-year-old didn't budge. Ophelia sighed and bounced Rose in her arms. "I made you food." Henry immediately sat up and walked out, not even saying 'Good morning.'

"Your big brother's a piece of shit," Ophelia cooed to Rose.

By the time Ophelia re-entered the kitchen (she had to change Rose, taking extra time to treat the rash the baby had developed), Henry had already helped himself to the food. 

"Where's mom and dad?" He asked with a mouthful of food.

"Where do you think?" Ophelia responded, sitting Rose on her lap. Henry rolled his eyes, figuring out what had happened by himself.

After a moment of silence, Henry spoke up again. "Do I have to go to school? You don't have to so-"

"Do you want to watch Rose instead?" Henry shook his head. "Thought so."

Ophelia's phone buzzed, and Henry grabbed it before Ophelia had a chance.

"'Poor baby,'? Awh, is this your boyfriend?" Henry teased. Ophelia's face turned red as she reached across the table to snatch the phone away.

"You're a shit."

"You didn't say he isn't, so..."

Ophelia was beyond thankful that she had Rose's car seat in her own car. She tried to use that small positive to outweigh all the negatives of taking a middle-schooler to school.

"Why do I have to sit in the back?"

"I need someone to watch Rose."

"Can we get McDonald's?"

"You just had breakfast, Henry."

"Walk me to class?"

"Can you walk me to class?"

"I think I need you to walk me to class."

In the end, Ophelia ended up taking the car seat out of the car and walking Henry into the school. It had been years since she was in the Junior High section of the school building, and everything looked different. She looked at the teacher's names above the classroom doors, only recognizing a small portion of them. 

"I need you to talk to my teacher," Henry explained once they were standing outside his homeroom classroom. Ophelia blankly stared at the boy, not believing what he was saying.

"Henry. I go to school here. Do you seriously think your teacher is going to believe I'm your mother?" Ophelia asked, dumbfounded. 

"I mean, you have a baby with you. Plus you look old enough..." Ophelia was about to yell at the younger boy when the classroom door opened. 

"Oh, hello Henry. And you must be Henry's mother?" The woman asked. Henry pleadingly looked at his sister, and Ophelia took pity on him. If their mother actually took time for her children, Ophelia wouldn't have put herself in this position. But after realizing she was the closest thing Henry- and Rose- had to a real mother, she decided to do the middle child a favor.

"Yes, I am." 

The 'parent'-teacher meeting had gone well, Ophelia thought. It mainly consisted of Henry's teacher cooing over Rose, who absolutely soaked up the attention. Ophelia knew the only reason why Henry hadn't gotten in any major trouble was due to the six-month-old. 

It had been 7:30 when Ophelia got back into her car. She sat there for a moment, just processing everything that had happened in the past half hour. Did she really look old enough to be Henry's mom? She never thought so, being almost the same size as him. Also, did she look like she just gave birth six months ago? She decided that the teacher was easily tricked or Ophelia thought too highly of herself.

Ophelia pulled out her phone and sent Ian a text.

'you will not believe what just happened.'

[jihyocentric]

I feel like Sana would have a breaking point and that would be if jihyo did get pregnant and acted like the baby was her partners

It would feel like a real slap to her face by being reduced to basically nothing in her own child's life

Even if we really love someone there's always a limit to how much of a fool we'll make of ourselves

I feel like she would try to meet new people bcs she'd be tired of always being the second choice, even if her hearts still on jihyo, she won't be made a fool anymore

I've been in her place, so I know how it feels like to hold onto smth that will never have a future, but hoping that maybe, just maybe, she would put you in first place

Really I was an idiot for hoping it would ever change, and I'm not proud of getting with someone in a relationship, but shit love hurts

Everytime she would text me, I had hope she would tell me that she's going to dump her boyfriend finally, illusion broke when she told me he proposed and she accepted, that was my wake up slap

I also realised that if she cheated on him, she would totally cheat on me with someone else

But now I have a loving partner and we are happily together ♥️

first of all i'm so sorry you went through this. i don't really know what to say, but i'm happy you found someone who cherishes you!!

i don't see this being 100% the case for that sahyo, though... honestly i just wrote that bc sometimes cheater jihyo is kinda hot so i wasn't thinking about expanding anything... just self indulgent stuff.

that sana did some sort of corruption with her and she's pretty manipulative, hence jihyo was crying. she does love her partner and feels guilty just as much as she wants sana... and sana knew from the beginning that their relationship would be like that if she insisted on being with jihyo.

they're pretty much just a different side of the same coin. jihyo cheats and shares her heart with her partner and with sana. she's definitely toxic with sana, but sana is just as toxic as she is... of course i would agree jihyo is more in the wrong as she is the one doing the cheating, but they're pretty much... abusive? on the same level.

again, i wasn't really thinking about expanding that lil drabble (and i won't really write a sequel), but here's what i think would happen to their future if jihyo happened to get pregnant: maternity makes jihyo realize she has to put an end on her thing with sana and she has to tell her partner the truth.

after becoming aware of how harmful she was to her partner, i believe jihyo wouldn't be able to forgive herself. ever. and she would probably want to end things with her partner as well, but i think the partner would just love her so much that they would eventually forgive her and ask her to stay. or... they would just stay in jihyo's life.

like maybe they break up and meanwhile jihyo is focused on keeping herself and her baby healthy, and she completely shuts sana off for sana's own good - they don't belong together, really. and jihyo would need time. sana would, too, but she probably wouldn't think so. (i was thinking about jeongyeon being the partner so i'll just say it's jeongyeon from now on.)

towards the last month of jihyo's pregnancy, i think jeongyeon would notice that jihyo was alone. of course, jihyo would still keep sana updated, but she wouldn't keep or want sana close. i can see her letting sana see their baby whenever she wants when the baby is out of the womb, but not while she's pregnant, because, again, she needs time.

and i think jihyo would be a mess... so jeongyeon would just show up and make everything better again, as a friend first, then as a lover again. i really think this sana wouldn't want to be a part of her kid's life if she knew jihyo would stay with jeongyeon. maybe jihyo and jeongyeon even get married, and sana would always feel like a bystander. jihyo's baby would already have another mom, so what would sana do there when jeongyeon already does everything?

sana would probably just leave and start a new life somewhere else, letting jeongyeon be the baby's mama, because that would be better for all of them. and for the baby. jihyo would feel guilty and undeserving of jeongyeon's love for the rest of her life, and, well, she really is/was. but i also think they would both sometimes, even if momentarily, forgive themselves and find happiness in the small things that life offers.

[maririririr]

Here’s a copy and paste rant from months ago!! I did this rant on a discord server so it’s pretty messy…

TW: mentions of su!cide And abuse

I don’t even know how to start but like the representation of mental health in Kagepro is amazing. I’ll start this off with like Jin doesn’t directly tell you “hey this character has this” but you just know the character has it. With Kano you know he has a compulsive lying disorder (along with some other things) because of how his music video represents it and the lyrics to his song + all the events and feelings he went through in the 5th LN. You actually get a representation (at least I haven’t seen this in like any other series) of being abused physically and emotionally, kanos mom used to abuse him physically, but a couple hours later come back crying and apologizing and it would repeat, but he didn’t think it was her fault and he loved her so much. It was only mentioned like twice in the LNs and he was really little when it happened but it’s still such a strong form of a lot of abuse that happens, not just the “I abuse my child, I feel no regret and my child hates me” type thing. Then Kano blaming himself so much for ayanos death he blames someone else for it (this ties in with survivors guilt kinda.) he also deals with getting manipulated….I can rant on abt kano but there’s other characters. We’ll go with Shintaro, obviously it’s known he has depression that’s just like there, but the representation of trauma he gets is SO GOOD. Again Jin doesn’t just go like “hey Shintaro has trauma.” But you just know he does because of the amount of representation. LTM he gets a couple of flashbacks to things, but things that aren’t just like “haha trauma is only abuse and witnessing something horrifying”. LTM and Shintaro represent that perfectly, and also him blaming himself for Ayanos suicide (survivors guilt/just guilt that comes along with trauma). Then also getting nightmares from trauma, like even if a lot of them are just Yaki talking to him in his dreams it’s still such a good representation. Also him pushing everything else away just to not forget Ayano. In the LNR Kano turns into Ayano, all the feelings Shintaro once had when he was with Ayano before came back, and he was afraid she hated him. I can go more on Shintaro but again other characters. Momo having a craving for attention when she was little because Shintaro was so much more intelligent than her. Even though she had parents who loved them both equally, she still felt not good enough, mostly mentioned in mr2, but she directly tells Shintaro she’s going to learn how to swim before him so she can be better than him in something, while not having a hateful feeling towards Shintaro. Then also mentioned in mr2 and the anime she has survivors guilt, thinking it was her fault her dad died. Then Seto in the LN route. Because he wanted to protect someone or not let go of someone so much he ended up trying to neglect and forget everyone else he loves, him thinking what if no one loved him all this time, basically running away from all his problems, and at the end of the route scared everyone would be mad at him for feeling the way he was feeling. In mr2 Seto felt helpless saying it was always like this and he can’t do anything to help, basically blaming himself for not being able to help anyone. He’s such a mess in the LNR I love him sm…..

Hibiya obviously has trauma and survivors guilt. In Otsukimi Recital he has tons of flashbacks even when he’s trying to be cheered up. Going to the park but getting flashbacks to Hiyori at the park, seeing Momo pet a cat and getting flashbacks to Hiyori petting the cat, etc. Blaming himself for not being able to save Hiyori as Hiyoris still “dead” and stuck in a loop.

Ayano with loneliness as seen in additional memory. She’s alone in the daze, and she misses everyone. But she KNOWS she had to do it, she sacrificed her health for everyone else’s even though she had to watch it do nothing in the end.

Ayano So desperately wishes to be the person everyone relies on, she loathes in it. If she can’t save anyone, what’s the point of her being there in the first place?

Haruka and Takane deal with diseases. Takane has a sleeping disorder and it makes her faint randomly, can be fatal. Haruka has a disease (most likely a heart disease) that is very fatal.

Haruka deals with things like wanting to be stronger because of his illness, feeling that sense of loneliness because he can’t physically be strong enough to do certain things, and having to visit the hospital frequently. But he wants to be himself (shown in anime.) In mr2 he deals with loneliness as everyone at school ignores him, he doesn’t have any friends but he still tries to be happy. In the hospital he finally makes a friend, he meets Takane. Takane has to leave but Haruka is stuck in the hospital due to his illness, but later Shintaro is taken to the hospital and Haruka becomes really good friends with him. But he has frequent nightmares abt Takane.

Takane deals with bottling up her emotions and feelings, she also deals with survivors guilt, thinking it’s her fault Haruka died. She was so caught up in her own pride she ignored him, she didn’t notice when he passed out from his illness. In mr2, she also doesn’t have any friends until Haruka. she deals with jealousy as well. She comes back after leaving the hospital to visit Haruka, even bringing gifts with her. But she sees Haruka and Shintaro playing video games together and laughing and stuff (btw she introduced Haruka to video games and played them all the time with him). She ran out of the hospital jealous and ended up committing su!cide

Even tho Ene is the same person as Takane, she deals with way different things in route xx and mr2. In route xx, she does her absolute best to try and not let Shintaro commit suicide, she does her best to distract him and does everything she can. She has to bottle up everything with Haruka, and keep everything from Shintaro. She’s afraid if she even brings up that she used to know Shintaro, it’ll give Shintaro bad memories of Ayano and the past. Yet she STILL tries her best to make Shintaro happy and distract him. She ends up failing, getting deleted and watching Shintaro kill himself. Plus she has to deal with her teacher literally being the one planning their deaths like??? (Even tho it’s technically not her teacher but yeah). Then in mr2 she admits she was running away from all her problems to shintaro, and says that Shintaro saved her as much as she saved him. (Ene and Shintaro stuff makes me AUGH)

[alostlovergirl]

A good ending?: Tony Stark x reader.

Summary: Your family has always struggled for money with your parents greedy addiction to drugs. Manipulation leads to arranged marriage.

Warnings: arranged marriage, abuse, drug abuse, manipulation, addiction, age gap ( reader is 19 and Tony is 34), implied dub-con, Stockholm syndrome,

Mom and dad never really allowed you to go to college because there wasn't enough money cut to arug abuse, and plus they didn’t want to lose their little maid. Tou did everything around the house and as soon as they let you outta of their grasp, you will run and never come back. They couldn't affords to lose you, but they could afford to sell you for a lifetime supply of drug money.

As soon as Mr. Stark came around out of coincidence of one of their dealers having a connection to him, they were talked into selling their only daughter to him in an arranged marriages. Much to your horror, they let him come into your room and have a private chat with you behind closed doors, which resulted in a lot of crying.

"oh... Don't cry.. You will have anything you please. No housewife work. Just my perfect spoiled wife. As long as you behave and please me." he pulled you into a warm hug. Even if you were disgusted,you craved the love that he was presenting you with. Your parents never gave you any type of love because they were always so high.

He rubbed your back as you cried into his shoulder, smelling his sweet cologne everytime you sniffled up a snot bubble. He treated you like lucky treasure, rocking you back and forth. " my poor abused flower... I'm gonna take you away and make you feel all better." he muttered and pressed his dry lips to your cheek.

Even though you were being forced into a marriage, you couldn't help, but feel comfort around him. Your inner child craved this, desperately.

__________________________________________________________________________ You couldn't help, but feel nervous for your arranged marriage. You never had your own sense of style because your mother forced you to wear hoodies and sweats, claiming you looked prettier than her. You never had the chance to tap into your girly side.

So, you felt overwhelmed looking at all the gorgeous, white dresses. Everything felt to luxury to you and you wanted to collapse right there. Tony was on the other side of the giant store, trying on tuxedos. He left you alone with the female workers who were trying to help you. The workers seemed really concerned about you as you wondered around looking at all of the expensive dresses. You still remember that Tony said that you had no budget and really could get whatever you want. Did you really want to spend that much money? It wasn't your money, it was his.

You picked up the cheapest dress you could final, completely forgoing what you really liked; a princess, laced, sparkly, V line dress that was 7,000 dollars. It was simply too much money.

As soon as you came out of your dressing room and looked at yourself in the big mirrors, Tony came back with a plastic wrapped tux. He looks at you and sighs.

"oh darling, you cannot like that plain little thing. No way. Pick another dress." he says with a slightly amused tone. You look at hm with wide eyes. How did he know? He waves you off and you go take off the dress.

He forces you to pick the dress you wanted. He checks the price tag, seeing what you was so worried about. He sighs and shakes his head. " only 7,000 dear. Why were you so worried? I said you could have whatever you please. I meant it." he says grabbing your face and kissing it. He kisses all over your face, leaving you blushy mess and making the workers look away in embarrassment.

You end up getting the dress you wanted.

__________________________________________________________________________

Everything was going amazingly well on your wedding day. Tony was the sweetest man ever and he made you feel special. Even when you cried when it hit, that you were being married just so your parents could get some money, he was there and he comforted you, drying your tears so the makeup team could finish their job.

His vows were so kind, even if he knew you for a few months. You weren't regretting this until the end came and he got you into his plushy bed.

Your hands rested on his shoulders as he littered your neck with soft, loving kisses. You didn’t know what to do, letting him have complete control of you and your body. Did you really want this? Did you want to lose your innocence to a man twice your age and whom you barely knew? He was pushing your dress up with his gentle hands and you started to freak out. You unconsciously slaps his hands away and he stops. He looked at with lust in his eyes.

"Dear?" he seemed concerned as you look at hm with fear dancing in your eyes. He places his hands firmly on your thighs and he smiles. " it's okay. Let me take care of you? ",the way he started to push you dress up again, giving you full eye contact had you breathless. He looked so good while taking what he wanted with gentle coercion. His hands made contact with the lacey panties he brought for his girl. He wanted you to be so pretty for him.

He tears them off under the dress and you gasped. " Tony! -"

" shhh..." he puts a finger to his perfect lips and smiled. He pushes two fingers to your glossy lips. " open, princess" the bet made you blush as you opened your mouth. He pushes his fingers so deep that you taste the metal of his wedding ring. Gagging, you look up to find him staring at you with lustful eyes that you feel hot under his gaze. You suck on his fingers without him saying anything. You swirl your tongue around the tip of his fingers, raking up as much saliva as you could. You make his digits nice, wet, and sticky. He pulls them out and rubs them on your already dripping cunt.

Your head falls back, tits bouncing at the sudden movement. He rubs your perky nipples through the fabric of the dress with his other hand. As you relish the pleasures of him fondeling with you, he pushes his fingers in, making you squeal. Your back arches like a cat, mewling and clawing at his arms as he finger fucks you.

The pleasure was absolutely amazing. He pulled down the neckline of your dress, exposing your bra. He snaps off your bra and his lips connected to your sensitive nipples, making you tug at his hair. Your eyes were crossing and your body squirming.

He just held you down, hand pressing onto your stomach as he moved down your body. He stops with his head under your dress, hot breath against your wet cunt. Your breath hitches as presses a firm kiss against your clit. He gives you a little taste by licking and kissing. Then he devours you, watching and listening to you scream. His ego grows as you try to pry his mouth off of your delicious pussy.

You started grinding against his face, chasing a fuzzy feeling in your tummy. He presses his face deeper in between your legs and your vision gets hazy. You feel a white heat wash over you and your legs shook. He kept lapping at you as you came down from your high, chest heaving.

He pulls away and chuckles at your dazed expression. " come take it out, darling...." he pulled you towards him by your ankles. You shiver, feeling his hard on through his tux. You take off his belt and unbuttoned his pants. His cock sprang out and he groaned in the sweet release of his hard on. He takes his heavy cock into his warm hands. He pats it on your lips. " open up, dear" you immediately opened your mouth and he shoves it in. He doesn't give you a chance to react before he starts to fuck your throat, loving the little noises your mouth made.

Salva and spit bubbles dribbled down her chin, choking. He holds your hair in a makeshift ponytail and pushes his cock in. He pulls out and groans impatiently.

"lay down. I need to be inside of you", he pushes you back on the bed and climbs in between her legs, pushing into your warm cunt. You let out a loud moan, whimpering.

He digs inside of you. He whispers sweet nothings into your ears as the rocks into you, slow and deep. You were shaking, hissing.

" mmm...it feels so tacking good..." Tony hits every spot that makes you see stars and you are just laying there taking him in with cries. His body felt so good against yours, almost like you guys fit perfectly together. You grab onto his velvet suit, begging him for more pleasure. He starts rutting into you, harshly.

Your stomach twisted in pleasure and he puts his big hand on your stomach, making you feel every inch that was being pushed inside of your cunt. Pussy dripping Ana making wet squelching sounds, you feel yourself getting closer to that fuzzy feeling from earlier. You start to chase it, clenching around his cock.

He moans and lifts your legs, hitting a better angle, making you see start once again. “Tony! Cumming!",you screamed out before squirting. He feels as you drenched his thighs and cock. He laughs and slams harder, pushing you into overstimulation.

You cum again in record time. He pushes you over the edge over and over, until he fills you up with warm cum. You came 5 times before he came once.

He pulls out and makes sure you are comfortable, clean, and well hydrated. When all is said and done, he held you close. He rubs your back, kissing your neck. He rocks you and he smiles.

" mmm...I love ya"

Maybe you got a good ending being with Tony.