#my mans desperate for dick

[shhhsoftnwet]

Sometimes all a bad bitch want is a silly little short king 👹❤️‍🔥

[iamlostandinneedofcoffee]

I like to imagine that every once in a while Red Hood just goes off comms for long stretches of time and comes back bruised as shit and exhausted before logging off for the night and the rest of bat brigade is trying to figure out which villain of the week keeps jumping him.

Eventually they, cause communication is a skill no one learned, just start harassing hood’s men to find out whose turf they are invading only to find out they thought the bats were beefing with Red again cause he keeps mumbling about brats.

Now they are trying to find out which one of them is lying about fucking with Jason and no one is owning up, the trackers they keep putting on him are fizzling out, no one as any idea and Jason ain’t saying shit. But like he’s never properly irritated about it or asks for help nor can they find anything out so they let it go for now (read keep trying to track him to no avail).

And then one night Red Robin comes across Red getting chased and then fighting off a feral looking teenager on the roofs of Crime Alley and just when he looks like he is getting the upper hand another drops down from above (how the fuck the nearest taller building is not anywhere near close enough to dive into the fight from what the fuck?!?) and joins the brawl.

Tim is about to rush in to help Jason before the two teens’ heads turn in unison to him with Lazarus green eyes and look like cats when they see a red dot. Jason panics and before he can grab them, they leap and now Tim is in a cartoon brawl dust cloud and all and Jason has joined in and is calling them all brats and how his gunna whop their ass- and there is a foot in his mouth.

And yet through it all Tim never feels afraid. In fact, as he fights he realises they are keeping up and beating him all whilst smiling and punning(?!? They must never meet dick SHIT DUCK) and that won’t fucking do, so he brings out all his tools and tricks and is getting matching by two raccoon twins. 20 minutes later they are all grinning bloody smiles and just as he is about to slam his bo staff up into into the female looking twin, a whistle is blown.

They all freeze and look over in unison as if they all became shining quadruplets at a giant shit house built fucking man. And like Tim has seen big men. Bane is a big mother fucker. Superman is a big mother fucker, and is also shaped like one. Bats is big but this guy even though his is maybe not as large he feels infinitely more terrifying and that’s before you get to the flaming(fucking literally, how does that even work or stay in the pony tail) white hair.

“Alright enough for tonight or foods gunna go cold. Inside.” A voice bellows across the roof before the man disappears??!? At the mention of food the one top of Tim almost starts drooling, gets up and starts dragging Tim’s still prone body across the roof and off of it OH FUCK AND INTO A WALL WHA and they went through it… well

A couple second later Jason and the other dude stumble in. Jason picks Tim up as he is coming down from that mini adrenaline rush at and puts a arm around Tim, half hug half chokehold, saying “say nothing and you get to join once a week. Say shit and you’re haunted.” And walks off to the kitchen and starts bringing out food.

… safe to say the rest of the bats are now confused why Tim of all people is now turning up bruised as well with Jason, cause if it was him to start why has he started loosing all of a sudden??? And he says fuck all but his weapons and fighting style has got more chaotic and terrifying.

Oh and he seems to be eating… well you win some and lose some

[freckle-face-420]

I want to see some sexy c o c k s! 🍆🫦🥵🥵

[huginsmemory]

I think whats so compelling about Sanji is that he's so terribly self conscious about being masculine that anything that performs masculinity better than him (ie, Zoro, obliviously, minus the women-fucking part), or skews masculinity, is a threat to him. Which makes him rampantly homophobic and transphobic. And as he also believes masculinity needs to be focused around being horny for women makes him also rampantly misogynistic cause he can't actually see women past them being a sexual object. Anyways it all culminates in you the audience being fairly certain that this man cannot be straight due to this terribly obvious fragility around his masculinity, and that if he ever got dicked down, it might solve all these issues.

[dad-fucky]

I've definitely posted about chronic pain & fauxcest here before right. Being in constant pain, having to explain it over and over to other people and only be half understood or believed. Having to fight for care, accommodations, income, all with energy you dont have. Crawling into bed with the only person who really understands, because they've seen it every day, seen how much pain you're really in. Someone who believes you, accepts you. Someone who will make sure you're fed and comfortable, who sets up the heat pad, someone who wants so badly to give you relief. Someone who won't run from your pain, won't be intimidated by it, might even enjoy it, because it's a part of you. Someone who's been there always, who gives you what you need without having to ask.

[tiger-grace]

The other day during a one sided 2 hour Batman lore rant on call with a friend i described Jason Todd as a “little guy” and their perturbed reaction to a murder vigilante diagnosed with enough unresolved mental health issues to fuel 20 villain backstories being called such had me saying “Look…”

[mysicklove]

are you okay?😭 you must be traumatized after yesterday's incident 😭 omg u deserve sm better than that man's dick

--🦇

TMI: me talking about sucking dick, substance use, making out and men (tw.)

i was going to post a silly story time but then i was like there is nothing more other than the fact he tried to finger me when i was dry, i sucked his gross ass dick, and also he used way too much tongue. I WAS SO FUCKING DRUNK I DONT EVEN REMEMBER WHEN HE LEAD ME TO THE ROOM ALL OF THE SUDDEN HE WAS JUST ALL OF THE SUDDEN ON TOP OF ME DHHSAIAIUAGS. so embarrassing DO NOT DRINK ALDHOHOL FRIENDS

jokes aside i actually think it’s highkey funny. simply bc i was borderline blacked out drunk and i remember litterally just giggling into his neck and his thighs BYEEEEE. he was so nice tho and was like “why are you laughing so much?” and i couldn’t even explain to him. anyways it’s for the mello plot 💅💅

omg ALSO i ordered wings before hand and i kept whining about how i wanted my wings and he kept being like “ik we will get ur wings in a minute” and i prob asked like 10 times throughout it. my friend knocked on my door when i was giving him head to tell me my doordash was here and i was like a cartoon character the way i popped up from my knees. literally ran out the door while he was pulling his pants up. so i didn’t have to suck it for long 😭😔😭😭😭😭😭😭 blue balled him but idc. those wings were fire btw. i shared it with some other guy who i was high key chill with

throughout it i was only thinking: i want wings, i am so excited to tell my friends about this, ew he is using too much tongue, am i gay??, i want my wings, i’m so drunk rn, ow why is he trying to finger me i am not turned on at all, i wish i was sucking sukunas dick, this shit sucks ass, i wish i was eating wings rn. not once was i like “wow this is enjoyable!” LOLOLOL

there was a lot more but u guys dont care, but 5/10 experience but its really funny to think about my experience LMAO. do not drink alcohol everyone

[crunchysocklover]

I just want him to hold me and tell me it’s gonna be ok :3

[realbeefman]

hate when people characterize dennis as someone who has safe sex. the man hooks up with random women from craigslist and likes to “bind and be bound” yet has tools that are pretty widely known within the community to be unsafe. dude maybe uses a condom regularly and has watched an ungodly amount of porn with “bdsm etiquette” and thats as far as he’s willing to go with it. he gets off on the illusion of danger and the illusion of power but he hates himself a little too much to ever actually let himself feel truly safe during sex.

anyways i think princess dennis looked particularly pathetic and like a sopping wet cat in the reunion episode and this scene always makes me giggle simply bc he looks like a lost toddler throwing a temper tantrum

[brownsugarboysstuff]

good boys let their master impregnate them <3 ^_^

(or whoever happens to be using their holes)

[cheesecakeislazy]

You guys do not understand how feral this song makes me feel. It actually makes me want to claw onto the next cute guy I see and make him love him. Please where can I find men that would kill for me because they’re so obsessed? 😭😩🙏🏻

Can you tell why I’m single?

[petthebear]

thinking about dick twitching in my hand .. ermm, thinking about dragging my thumb over a man’s tip n watching him squirmmm … okkkk

[justaregularken]

Fully naked or fully clothed?

Fully clothed. My cock may be massive, but who says I want to show it off? 😔✊

[bitchapalooza]

I'm probably gonna drag my dad to see puss in boots the last wish with me if his friend still doesn't see anything he's wants to watch so honestly I'm actually curious what he'll think of it, especially Jack Horner, my all time favorite villain ever I'm sorry he's so unapologetically an asshole I wanna personally lock him up for his crimes and serve him his daily slop of mystery meat lmao

[prlssprfctn]

Bruce, sighing dreamily: I miss times when little Jason wanted to be like me. He was so cute.

Dick, frowning: Man, be fr, you were his dad, yes, but not the role model. Me, from the other side? Yep, yep.

Bruce, murmuring under his breath: I find it hard to believe that any teenager would want to be more like a guy who wore the Discowing suit.

Dick, gasping: What did you say?!

Jason, sitting between them on the coach: It was Alfred.

Bruce and Dick: What.

Jason: I said, my role model was Alfred.

Bruce: But-

Jason: He taught me how to shoot. And gave me his recipe book. And I was desperate to get his sympathy, so I cleaned all the manor myself. I mean. You two were fine, but you were ridiculous — I never wanted to be like you when I grew up.

Dick: Ouch.

Alfred, smiling: The last time I rested well was when Master Jason was Robin. Needless to say, I definitely approve his attempts to make me proud.

[alygator77]

another wip from me. hehe. supermodel satoru.

warnings: mdni, smut, fluff, masturbation, obsession. (honestly, satoru feels kinda yandere af. he's fucking down bad for you.)

supermodel! satoru whose life is a whirlwind—flashing cameras, designer clothes, and breathless whispers of adoration. on the surface, he has it all: the perfect career, the perfect face, the perfect life. but perfection… has its price.

supermodel! satoru who, after a ten-hour photoshoot that left him feeling more mannequin than man, slumps into the cold embrace of his sleek penthouse. the city glimmers outside his floor-to-ceiling windows, vibrant and alive, but it feels distant, like a movie playing on mute. he’s surrounded by luxury but drowning in solitude.

supermodel! satoru who, running on three hours of sleep and bad coffee, barely notices when his fingers fumble over his phone, sending a text message to you—meant for his manager. tossing the phone aside with a sigh, he stretches out on the couch, exhaustion pulling at his limbs—unaware that this accidental message is about to flip his world upside down.

supermodel! satoru who, when your response comes through, doesn’t realize at first that he’s texted a stranger. his initial confusion shifts to mild annoyance, but that changes the moment he reads your sharp, unfiltered reply. intrigue replaces irritation, and before he knows it, he’s texting back, unable to resist the pull of you on the other end.

supermodel! satoru who keeps his identity a secret, finding it strange at first, but soon, it becomes refreshing. for once, he’s not the face on billboards or the name in glossy magazines. no—for the first time in forever, someone is talking to him—not his fame, not his face, just him.

supermodel! satoru who finds himself grinning like an idiot whenever his phone buzzes with your name. you tell him about your life—mundane, you call it, but to him, it’s captivating. days turn into weeks—texts in the middle of the night when he’s jet-lagged and bored in some foreign country. voice notes where you laugh at his terrible jokes.

supermodel! satoru who one day, finally reveals who he is, and with a mix of arrogance and curiosity, boldly asks for your photo—eager to see the face behind the name he’s grown so fond talking to.

c’mon now... I show my face to the world every day. least you could do is show me yours ;)

your reply pings through, accompanied by an attachment, and for a moment, his breath catches.

supermodel! satoru who has seen countless beautiful people, surrounded by them every day, but there’s something about you that has him hooked. perhaps it’s not just the way you look—it’s the way you’ve made him feel. for the first time in forever, he’s not just admired; he’s seen.

supermodel! satoru who ends up sprawled out on his couch later that night, your picture propped up on the coffee table in front of him as he grips his shaft. his shirt is discarded somewhere on the floor, his sweatpants pushed down to his thighs as his cock strains in his hand—red, leaking and desperate for attention. all he can focus on is you.

supermodel! satoru whose glossy lips part as he pants, pumping his dick, his head tipping back while the phone’s glow casts shadows across his flushed skin. his penthouse is filled with the slick sound of his hand sliding over his length, mixing with his shuddering breaths.

“fuuuck… so fucking pretty…” he rasps, his hips bucking into his fist. his strokes grow faster, more desperate, as his body thrums with heat.

supermodel! satoru who murmurs your name like a prayer, thick with need, chasing his inevitable release. “nnngh… gonna—ahhh—gonna cum f’you,” he moans, breathy and broken. His voice cracks as his back arches off the couch.

supermodel! satoru whose strokes grow frantic, erratic, his abs flexing tight as thick, hot ropes of cum spill over his stomach, painting his skin in sticky streaks of white. the release leaves him trembling, every drop wrung from his body as a low groan escapes his parted lips.

supermodel! satoru who exhales a quiet laugh, his chest heaving as a lazy smirk tugs at the corner of his mouth. he trails his fingers through the mess, smearing it across his toned abs as his smirk deepens—amused and awed by how much you’ve made him cum.

supermodel! satoru who can’t focus during his photoshoot the next day, every click of the camera drowned out by thoughts of you. his mind lingers to the filthy fantasy of your body beneath his—your lips whispering his name, your legs wrapped around his waist.

the ache in his pants becomes unbearable, and he excuses himself, slipping away to the bathroom under the pretense of ‘fixing his hair.’

supermodel! satoru who locks the bathroom door behind him with trembling fingers, his breath hitching as he pulls up your photo again. his hands fumble with the buttons of his designer pants, desperate to release his aching erection.

supermodel! satoru who stares at your picture with half-lidded eyes, his thumb swiping over the swollen tip of his dick, spreading a slick bead of precum across the sensitive head. "fuck… you’ve got me so worked up," he whispers with a cocky smirk, and his free hand grips the edge of the sink, his cock twitching eagerly in his fist.

“pretty girl… god, I’d ruin you,” he shudders as he fucks his hand. with a sharp inhale, he reaches out to twist the handles of the porcelain sink. but honestly, the cascading water is a feeble attempt to drown his debauched sounds—sounds he knows he can’t hold back.

supermodel! satoru whose mind spirals into pure filth, his fantasies running wild as he pictures your body beneath his—writhing, trembling, utterly at his mercy. your hands would cling to his shoulders, your nails digging into his skin as he holds your legs apart, spreading you wide as he fucks your tight little hole.

"bet you'd look so fucking good under me," he hisses through gritted teeth. “all spread out, legs shaking… pretty little mouth begging f’me.” his hand tightens around his cock as his hips jerk forward, “fuuuuck, you’d take me so well, wouldn’t ya? haaa—every fucking inch.”

supermodel! satoru who is teetering on the edge when a sharp knock cuts through the haze, echoing against the bathroom door.

“satoru? you’re needed back on set!” his manager calls, muffled but clear.

but his strokes turn frenzied, the interruption fueling the thrill—the sheer audacity of jerking off in the middle of a shoot. his moans mix with the rush of running water and the persistent pounding on the door.

“shit—fuck—fuck—” his voice cracks, his body seizes, and in that instant his cock erupts. he whimpers, milking his dick as his forehead falls forward against the mirror. as his thick hot seed spills on his hand, it streaks across the counter in messy, sticky arcs.

“satoru!” the knocking continues, louder this time, his manager’s voice growing sharper.

“i’m coming!” he yells back, and the irony of his words pulls a breathless laugh from his lips.

supermodel! satoru who stands there for a moment, panting, his reflection staring back at him in the mirror. he’s a fucking hot mess—cheeks flushed, his hair a disarray, and his lips are swollen from biting down so damn hard, trying to keep quiet.

supermodel! satoru who tucks himself into his pants, buckling his belt with practiced ease as his smirk slides back into place. he splashes cold water on his face, tidies his hair, and by the time he steps out of the bathroom, he’s the typical picture of confidence—swaggering back to set with a cocky grin as though nothing happened.

but deep down, he knows he’s utterly, completely fucked.

why? because you’ve become his favorite addiction, his sweetest downfall. and it’s only a matter of time before he finally makes you his.

a full fic for this will be coming out! lmk if you wanna be tagged. edit: taglist closed