#my exact thoughts as i read that section
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Richard Papen’s Snow Trauma (1984, colorized)
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awrkive · 1 month ago
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WARM NIGHTS & CLEAR LINES — JJK (m.)
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there haven't been a lot of people who have come into your life that became important to you – and you didn’t expect jeon jungkook to be one if it – not at all. but what started as a casual relationship turned into more than that, and now you find yourself deeply in love with him – and happily so.
or; your first "i love you" comes out completely wrong.
PAIRING cnbl!jungkook x cnbl!female reader
GENRE r18+ (SMUT, fluff) MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!
WORD COUNT 11k of pure fluffy and smutty nonsense 😍 literally 90% of this is smut
WARNINGS/MISC fluff galore, cnbl jk is the father of all simps all men need to be like him fr, angst if u squint but like not really 😭, oc's tendencies to be avoidant of her feelings show up lol i still love u saur, best boy cnbl jk ):, he will disintegrate if he cant call her by a petname [ explicit sexual content: unprotected s*x (its just a fanfic its not that serious), panty sniffing (like very quick), dirty talking lol, c*nnilingus, they hold hands during it <3, VERY SLIGHT foot action but like its very fleeting lol u dont need to worry about it lmfao, multiple s*x positions, cowgirl position cos her eyes are pretty trope, good ole cre*mpies ], L b*mb drop and an ily kink develops. literally every paragraph theres an ily crying. anyways i think thats all feel free to inform me if i left out any
NOTES i have like 11 asks on my inbox asking about how cnbl couple is and what their label is are they official now etc etc and they've sitting there since bush administration </3 after two years of drought we are finally so back. i purposefully didnt answer any of th asks since i want to make a drabble for when they finally make things official so this is it awrkive nation🩷 this can be read as a standalone?? but like pls read cnbl first lol (also i thought i ate this title when i thought about it but now i realize it kinda sounds ass but its 2am so give me some slack. also this is unedited skjfdjkfhdk AND this will also be my last post before i go mia for the next few weeks due to big life happenings. leave ur thoughts in my inbox or reply section to get a cnbl jk to go🫂
ORIGINAL STORY [CNBL] | MAIN MASTERLIST
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Jungkook loves when he gives it to you slow. Loves the heavy breathes that puff out of your mouth, the drawl out moans that give your mouth that lovely, erotic O-shape which image burns in his head for the next few days (two days, at the very least), and the way he can feel the exact moment when you clench and unclench around the ridges of his hard cock. 
But he also loves it when he jackhammers into your pussy, pounding in and out of it at a quick pace that your eyes roll to the back of your head, your fingers digging into his skin (or scalp), the staccato rhythm of your “oh”s and “ah”s that sound like real music to his ears, and the way your mouth hangs open as you utter sweet gibberish into the air because the pleasure he’s giving you feels too much. 
“Give it to me, give it to me,” you whisper against his mouth. On your back, you’re sprawled across his bed, your thighs resting on the crook of Jungkook’s elbows as he pounds  into you like he’s trying to win a contest.
There’s dried up tears on the side of your eyes, your lips swollen from the way you’ve been kissing for minutes, and Jungkook finds it hard to focus on one thing when you have your pussy gripping around him like a fucking vice, your breasts bouncing at his every quick thrust, and your pretty face looking at him like you just want nothing but cock. 
“Y-yeah, fuck—” Jungkook grunts, repeating the same motion of fucking into you at a pace so fast he can hear his bedframe hitting the wall when he thrusts back. He grips your thighs tight, veins popping out of his arms. “You like this, baby? Love when I fuck you quick and fast?” 
You nod your head, bottom lip caught in your teeth, looking up at him with those hooded eyes that Jungkook is near to losing his goddamn mind. God, you’re so fucking pretty it genuinely hurts him. Most especially his dick.
“Am I fucking you stupid, angel?” He slides out, and then enters you abruptly, making you cry out in pleasure. “I'm taking care of you so good you can't think straight, huh? Hm?’
“Y-yes!” You squeak out, grabbing to try and hold onto his biceps. Jungkook leans forward so you can find leverage on his body, his dick hitting deeper into your core at the movement. At the mewl that you let out, he stretches your legs higher until you almost feel like you’re being folded in half, with Jungkook jackhammering his dick into your tight pussy. 
"S-so good…" you whimpered, almost out of breath. 
Jungkook groans at the pretty sound. “Ngh– I feel fucking good, too, baby. You're so fucking pretty. Squeeze those tits for me.”
You oblige, grabbing your boobs and squishing them together. Jungkook revels at the sight, wanting nothing but to burn every second in memory. Sometimes, he wishes he can have some sort of copy of you two doing this… just a little something for your own private enjoyment. He hasn’t brought it up to you, mostly because he thinks you won’t necessarily be into the idea as much as he is. Will probably say no, or be partial to it at best.
Next time. He tells himself. 
“Fuck, fuck – fuck!” Jungkook grunts, sliding in and out of you, picking up his pace more, beginning to sound delirious at the sensation of your walls fluttering around his cock. It’s impossible the way you just grow tighter every second, clenching around him like you don’t have any intentions of letting go. 
“J-Jungkook—!” You cry out, arms reaching out for him, and when Jungkook sees the small stream of tears falling out from your eyes again, he can’t help but fuck you senseless. “Oh my god– ah– fuck, i-it feels so good, don’t stop, don’t stop.” 
He continues his movements, pounding into your pussy, tightening his hold on your hips. Your nails dig into his forearms, and your chest subtly moves up and down at every action that he makes. When you close your eyes, that’s when Jungkook knows that your climax is near, and so he stays consistent in his pace, just fucking into you deep and fast – just like how you like it now.
“Ah– there, Jungkook— oh god–!” You yelp, choking in your words, your pussy spasming around Jungkook’s cock until he feels that burst of hot white around his shaft. You reflexively let out a loud moan, but what you say next completely catches him off-guard. 
“It feels so good– I love you.” 
Jungkook staggers, dick slipping out of you momentarily at your sudden confession. But as he lets his gaze fall to your face, you have your eyes closed, lost in the moment, like how you usually are when you just orgasmed – and Jungkook knows he can’t talk to you at that state, nor can he ask to confirm what you just said.
So he looks down at where your bodies meet, shakily breathes when he sees the base of his cock getting covered in your cum, your juices dripping all over his dark sheets making a wet spot underneath you.
“F-fuck,” He hisses, quickening his pace to let himself go. 
He thinks about the sound of your “I love you”, how it falls prettily on your lips, and how good it would be to hear that one more fucking time.
Letting out a guttural groan, the thought completely tips him over the edge, and he grips his cock to shoot his cum into your swollen hole, painting your walls white just as you painted his shaft the same color with your own orgasm. 
Unexpectedly, he feels you gush the second time.
It’s cold and it’s hot at the same time – the sensation. It’s top three one of the best feelings a man could ever experience, and Jungkook is greedy – always greedy when it comes to you – that he pushes his cock back in to put it all in you, not wanting any to be wasted on the mattress. And just because he wants to hear that pretty moan from you again when he enters your cunt.
You do, making the hair on his body tingle. 
He drops down beside your body – more like on top of you, but a little off to the side – making sure to not put all his weight on you lest he hurts you. As usual, you receive him wholeheartedly with open arms, humming when he begins to suckle on your still rock-hard nipples, his hand shooting up to fondle the other one. Instantly, your hand caresses his hair.
“Kook.”
“Hm?” He hums against your breast. 
“I’m sore. Get your dick off me.” 
Jungkook frowns, but nonetheless acquiesces and slides out of you. He hisses when he feels your cum leaking out, about to insert a finger in you to stop it, but you take his temporary separation from you to stand up from the bed, leaving him on it alone. 
“Baby,” Jungkook calls – whines – really, looking at you with furrowed brows. 
You roll your eyes. “I’m not cockwarming you tonight. I’m going to the shower–” When you see him moving to get up from the bed as well, you shoot him a glare. “No. No funny business. I’ll just go clean up and you can too and then we’ll sleep.”
“I can clean you up.” Jungkook looks at you, wide-eyed. You look at him dryly. He sighs and then lets himself fall back to the bed, naked and all that, his dick still semi-hard against his stomach. “Okay, fine.” 
“Good.” 
He stares at your ass as you go to the bathroom, enjoying the view of your naked back before you disappear inside the room. 
Jungkook closes his eyes as he crosses his arms on the back of his head, thinking that maybe it’s good you didn’t let him in the shower with you because… how does he bring up the fact that you just said… it?
“I love you.” 
Did you… mean that? Like… you love him? Like, actually, love love him? 
It’s been eight months since your whole set up started. Four months of solely fucking and another four months of more fucking but you’ve actually both established that you like each other.
Of course, Jungkook feels more than that. He has for a long time now. He’s liked you since the first time you had sex and he started having deeper feelings for you every other day since then.
Needless to say, Jungkoon loves you.
Has for a long time now. 
But he didn’t say anything because he was scared that you would be scared. He felt like the luckiest guy on earth when you told him you liked him – and he felt pretty much untouchable when you two started exclusively dating each other four months ago. You’re definitely his girlfriend now and him your boyfriend – and sure, you haven’t had The Talk yet, but… now that you said you love him… that pretty much changes the course of everything…
Right? 
However, he finds himself pondering on it. 
Did you really mean that? Jungkook doesn’t think you’re the kind of person who just spout words as heavy as that confession, so you couldn’t have been insincere when you let that out. 
But… you were in the middle of sex, though. Did you just say it because you were in that position? Maybe you figured him out long ago now, have already known that he loves you, so you just said it to get him off? 
That’s probably not the case, he physically shakes his head. He knows that you know you don’t need to do anything else other than be underneath him or on top of him so he can release. Hell, your mere voice is even enough to tip him off the edge; there are countless incidents where he feels a certain kind of desperation for you, in the morning or in the middle of the night when you’re away and not in his arms, and he presses your name on his contact last, then what’s supposed to be an innocent call turns into something very much far from wholesome when he feels his dick twitch at the very sound of your voice and embarrassingly cums in his pants when you goad him about it. 
You know your tight hold on him. You don’t need to say I love you to get him off. 
But damn, did that really get him going more than usual.
“Shit.” Jungkook hisses, his head throbbing at the thoughts going haywire inside his head. His dick has calmed down now, soft in between his legs, and he’s starting to feel sticky, especially with the ruined sheets on his back. 
Standing up, he picks them up to put them in the hamper, grabbing a towel real quick to wrap around his lower half. 
When he finishes changing the bedsheets into fresh and clean ones, that’s when you step out of the shower. 
“I turned on the hot water for you.” You say, tightening your baby blue robe which is a pair of Jungkook’s own robe that he bought for you two two months ago.
Jungkook walks over to your direction and takes you by the waist to plant a quick kiss on your lips. 
“Thank you, angel,” he says. You give him a smile and he can’t help but give you a peck once again. “I made the bed.” 
“Thanks.” 
Jungkook stands there and he doesn’t notice that he’s staring until you point it out with an arched brow. 
“What?” 
With a surprised look, Jungkook takes himself out of his trance. “Oh, uh, nothing.” He gives you a hesitant smile. He’s actually thinking of asking you about the thing you said earlier. But right now, as he looks at you again, he finds himself a bit reluctant. “I’ll shower now.” 
You look at him weird and Jungkook chuckles as he leans down to kiss you again. 
When you break the contact, going over to his closet where a huge portion of your own clothes have already made its own way to, Jungkook thinks that maybe he’ll bring it up when he finishes showering. 
But as he steps back out of the shower ten minutes later, you’re already sprawled across the bed with your nightie on.
And as Jungkook steps closer to you, you’re fast asleep, soft snores coming out of your mouth, pretty and peaceful in your slumber. 
Jungkook smiles at the sight. 
Tomorrow. He’ll bring it up tomorrow instead. 
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In the morning when Jungkook woke up, he didn't find you in his arms like he expected to. And when he looked through the notifications on his phone, your text told him that you already went for your 10 am class. Jungkook’s first one is at 2:30 in the afternoon. 
He intended to take you out for lunch in the afternoon, but when he called you, you said you had a meeting with your club and you’d only be free in the evening onwards. 
At 9:30pm, when all of Jungkook’s classes have ended, he sent you a text again, hoping you’d be free by the time. 
One whole day of not seeing your face and he was starting to feel a little on edge. 
[9:31pm] Jungkook: hi baby classes ended [9:31pm] Jungkook: hru i havent seen u at all today
Jungkook couldn’t help but send another one.
[9:32pm] Jungkook: i missed u. can i come over?
At that point, he was already over at the uni’s parking lot, going to the direction of his car and unlocking it when he got near. When he buckled himself into the driver’s seat, he hoped to see a reply from you. 
But nothing came.
When he arrived home at the end of the day, he took a quick half-bath and ate some leftovers in the fridge. 
As of now, as he settles himself onto his bed, he scrolls through your text thread, the Delivered button on his last text taunting him the longer he looks at it.
With furrowed brows, he begins to type up another message but then soon, the Delivered stamp changes to Read, and the three dancing dots on your end play on his screen, which somehow lightens his mood.
[10:45pm] princess🥰💓: Hello, Kook! So sorry for the late reply. I got caught up with classes and the long meeting with the club today [10:46pm] princess🥰💓: We apparently have to push the fall edition of the print a week earlier and I also have to revise some stuff in my thesis so I’m a bit tight on sched
Jungkook nods to himself upon reading the text message, feeling bad for you.
[10:47pm] Jungkook: ohh ic ic [10:47pm] Jungkook: do u want me to bring u food? 
[10:48pm] princess🥰💓: Like, youre coming over? 
[10:48pm] Jungkook: yeahh [10:48pm] Jungkook: if u want 
Jungkook waits as the bubbles appear and disappear on your end, until he receives your final reply.
[10:50pm] princess🥰💓: Hmm I appreciate it but Im over at Hana’s right now. Club stuff. And then I’ll go home later to work on my paper
Pouting, Jungkook sighs as he reads your message. He really wants to see you today… he misses your pretty face and your voice and your touch.
But he doesn’t really want to push. You’re very anal about your personal space, especially when it relates to your academics. 
Letting out another heavy sigh again, he tells you to give him a call when you’re at your place. 
He doesn't receive any.
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“Hey,”
“What the—” You see the librarian from across the room immediately eyeing you with a deadly stare. Mouthing a shameful “sorry”, you clutch your chest, turning to the embodied voice again properly this time. Only to get taken aback. “Oh hey… hi.”
Jungkook stands in front of you and he looks so… handsome – nothing new or groundbreaking, per se. He always looks like that. With only a simple combo of grey hoodie and black cargo pants, his backpack slung over one shoulder, he can probably outmodel professionals on the runway. Though, the way he looks so comfy is making you want nothing but to snuggle him. 
“Busy day?” He asks, pertaining to the laptop and stack of books on your table. Placing his bag on the floor underneath the table, he takes the seat beside you. 
“Yeah… I'm writing an essay right now.” You offer him a small smile. It feels like you haven't seen each other for weeks, but the truth is, it's just been over two days since you were at his place.
“I see. Do you mind me here?”
“Nope. You can do whatever you want.”
"Can I kiss you then?" He asks and that makes you pause. 
Looking around, you take note that there aren’t a lot of people in the library anymore as it’s already late. There’s the librarian a few feet away from you, but he’s currently busy doing something on his computer. With a quiet chuckle, you face Jungkook and say, “Do you need to ask?” 
Jungkook shrugs, already leaning towards you. “I just feel like it.”
“It's fine, Kook.” you turn your head to him, and he does not waste any second, closing the gap between you both and capturing your lips in his for a soft kiss.
You sigh in his mouth. You miss him so much and he smells so good it calms your insides. You've been stressing over the essay you’re writing, but all that seems to die down as a result from the exchange with Jungkook.
God, you really need to talk to him. 
“Missed you.” He says once your faces are apart. He pecks your lips one more time for good measure and gives you that adorable bunny smile of his.
“We saw each other, like, two days ago.” You chuckle, making sure to muffle the sound.
Scooting his chair closer to you, Jungkook whines in your ear, “Too long.” When you look at his face, there's a small hint of pout on his lips. 
“Well, we're here now.”
“Really?” Jungkook raises his brow. “Then let's get out of here. You can write your essay at my place and I'll cook you dinner and then we can binge watch the third season of Twin Peaks.” 
“You haven't even started on the first season, why are you watching the third.” You say with an incredulous tone. 
“Doesn't matter.”
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It does matter. 
Jungkook has driven you both to his place. When he turned on his TV, you told him you can just start Twin Peaks all over again so he can understand what he's watching, but he insisted that he was gonna know the context eventually – fast forward, he did not. So here he currently is, asking you who everybody is and what’s the context of what they’re saying, and as much as you love his company, people posing questions after questions while watching something will never not be a pet peeve of yours. 
“Baby,” you start. Jungkook looks at you with doe eyes. You cup his face and stare at him seriously. “You're annoying me.”
He lets out a gasp. 
A literal, audible gasp. 
“That hurt. Please tell me you're joking.” Jungkook says that, but you can see the playful glint in his eyes as you squint yours at him.
He made you bulgogi and you both devoured the last of it five minutes ago – and you're thankful for his kindness and generosity but god—
You push on his chest lightly. “Then stop asking. I told you we can just watch the first season but then you want to jump into the last one, of course you're gonna be confused.”
“Yeah but you already watched all of it. I didn't want you to get bored.” Jungkook pouts. You stare at him for a while and you kind of hate that he’s so handsome and so cute at the same time it makes it hard for you to completely be annoyed with him.
There's a fond look on your face when you roll your eyes again. Scooting closer to him on the couch, you plant a quick kiss to his cheek. 
“You're really sweet, Kook, but why don't we just watch a movie or something.”
He leans down to kiss your mouth. “Alright. You pick the movie and I'll go grab some chips from the pantry.”
You smile at him before he disappears to fetch some food, leaving you to browse through the catalog. When he returns shortly, you muse, “You're really nice and sweet to me today. What's up?”
Jungkook scoffs, as if offended by what you said. “Am I not nice and sweet every other day?”
“That's not what I meant. You're just extra sweet and extra nice tonight— I mean, you usually put up a fight on who picks the movies.”
“I let you win every time though?” He says and you nod in thought. 
“True.” Looking back to the television, you hover over the Notting Hill poster. Thinking that the description sounds interesting, you click on it. As the movie loads, you turn your gaze to Jungkook and nudge his leg. “But still…”
He can’t help but chuckle at your persistence. Gathering your feet on his lap, he leans back and retorts, “I just missed you so much. Is that bad?”
You don't anticipate the way he lifts one of your legs, holding your ankle up and then putting a kiss on it. 
It makes blood rush to your cheeks. With his mussed hair and the grey hoodie and cargo pants from earlier changed into a simple white shirt and grey sweatpants, he looks comfy you just want to jump him and bite him and kiss him all at the same time. 
Damn. He really makes you feel a whole lot of things you're starting to think you need an intervention.
You’ve never been so attracted to somebody before. It may be because you know you’re past the point of being just attracted to him.
And then there’s that beat in your heart again. The flip-flopping and the weird feeling in your stomach.
You look away from his intense gaze. “No.”
You hear him let out a low chuckle, a sound so attractive you feel the hair on every part of your body standing up. 
“Come here.” he puts your legs away from his lap, much to your little disappointment. But he beckons you to come close to him, and so you do, leaving your lying position from the couch to go over to where he is. You don't know whether you're gonna place yourself beside him or what, but he beats you to it as he takes your thighs and guides you to straddle him. 
You do so without any words, following his lead. You feel heat creeping up your neck when you finally land on his lap, his arms circling around you. 
“Why do you still smell like flowers even after a whole day?” It's followed with him sniffing the juncture between your neck and shoulder, inhaling your scent. 
You flinch 'cause it tickles a little. He always does and says that shit and you can't help but laugh, always not knowing what to say to that. But Jungkook doesn’t seem to need your input, anyway. 
He squeezes your body, hugging you tighter to him. 
“I really missed you, you know?”
You giggle. “Yeah, you said that the third time now.”
“You're keeping count but why can't you just say you miss me too?” He pulls away, making sure to face you so you see the pout on his face. 
You peck his lips. “That's because I don't.” You joke, earning a glare.
“Wow, first you say I'm annoying and now you apparently didn't miss me?” You're sure he's joking but the frown on his face makes you think that maybe somewhere in his head, he's thinking otherwise.
You smile at him. “I was just kidding, Kook. Of course I missed you too. And thank you for the food.” You say against his lips, leaning down to kiss him again. 
“Does that mean you’re done avoiding me now?” 
Breaking away from the kiss, you look at him in surprise, taken aback by his words. 
“What?” you say, confused. 
Jungkook arches a brow. You both stare into each other’s eyes but then his gets way too intense that you can’t help but look away. That’s when you hear him sigh. 
“Baby, talk to me.” Jungkook cups your jaw with his palm, gently directing your face towards his. “I don’t like when we don’t talk. You clearly have something on your mind. What is it? Is it something I can fix?” 
Hearing his words makes your heart melt and your brain turn into mush. Is it something I can fix? Jesus.
How can you not fall for him when he says things like that? 
“Did I do something wrong?” Jungkook asks when you don’t say a thing. 
That earns him an instant, aggressive shake of your head. 
“No, Jungkook. You didn’t do anything wrong, not at all,” you say, planting your palms on his shoulders to assure him. You see the slight hint of smile on the curve of his lips. “It’s, uh, it’s me…” you trail off, not sure how to navigate your next words. You take note of the way Jungkook’s eyebrows meet in confusion. “I’ve just been… feeling weird lately.” 
At that, his confusion grows even more, but it’s more out of concern instead of perplexity. 
“What’s wrong, angel? You don’t feel okay?” He says, caressing your face as if he’ll find the issue there. He looks so willing to just get you to okay and it makes your heart beat a little faster than usual.
“No– I mean, I feel okay. It’s not that,” you shake your head, shy at his doting. When he waits for your next words, you can’t help but bury your face in the crook of his neck as you say— more like whisper— against his skin, “I told you I love you the other day.” 
You feel Jungkook stilling under you. And it makes you nervous. Heart racing against your ribcage, you can’t find it in yourself to break away from your hold on him because that would mean you have to look into his eyes – and you don’t want to. Your cheeks feel so hot and you feel like throwing up. Your emotions are all over the place and Jungkook’s prolonged silence isn’t helping at all. 
But suddenly, those thoughts die down when you feel him relaxing underneath you, his arms wrapping around your waist. You feel a weight on the crown of your head and with a gentle rub on your back, Jungkook whispers against your hair, “I love you, too.” 
That makes you instantly look up from him. When you see his face, his lips are curved into a soft smile. 
With furrowed brows, you voice out your concern. 
“You don’t need to say it back just ‘cause I told you that.” 
Now, it’s Jungkook’s turn to be confused. 
“I’m not saying it just ‘cause you said it, baby.” He looks so sincere and for a moment, you feel bad for doubting him for a second. Jungkook must’ve noticed the look on your face as he cups your jaw again, angling it towards him. You feel his smile against your mouth when he presses his lips to yours. “I'm in love with you, __. I have been for the past few months now.” 
Your eyes widen a bit when he calls you by your name.
Jungkook has always liked calling you by every endearing pet name in the world that you’re lowkey convinced he forgot your real name at this point, but when the sweet syllable rolls off his tongue, you can’t help but melt. 
He doesn’t seem to notice your surprise, though. Just breaks away from the contact you’re both engaged in and he takes your wrist in his hand, lifting it to his face to kiss the skin on the side of your palm. 
The action was so momentary and brief but it doesn’t deter the fact that it made your heart jump. 
You think it’s funny how you feel so much whenever he’s around. You think it’s funny that you feel so giddy – even after all this time. 
You think it’s funny that before the whole thing started, you’ve never considered this ever happening but here you are, completely elated over the fact that you’re in love with Jeon Jungkook and he feels the same way too. 
“You have?” You say, voice quiet. He nods, humming, leaning to your palm when you put it over his cheek. “Since when?” 
“The first time we went to that abandoned house.” 
Your lips part at the declaration. That was… that happened so long ago. Nearly four months from the present.
“That long?” You blink a few times at him, not really sure how to react to that confession. 
Jungkook chuckles lowly, pressing a kiss to your thumb again. You like how his instinct is to always have a form of physical contact with you whenever you’re around. You don’t know if he knows that himself, but you’ve definitely observed that for the past few months you’ve been “exclusively” seeing each other and it just… absolutely melts you. 
“I know… I’m a bit of a coward for not telling you sooner. But I didn’t want to scare you off.” Jungkook says admittedly, and his last sentence makes your heart twinge. 
He didn’t want to scare you off. Of course he’d think that. You had a total breakdown at the prospect of him opening up to you just four months ago – before you told him you liked him.
You swallow the sudden lump in your throat. “I— yeah. I was in my head over the past two days, you know?” 
Jungkook’s face etches into a look of concern. “Hm?” 
Nodding your head slowly, you find comfort in tracing random shapes and lines on his chest instead. 
“These feelings… they’re not new. I didn’t just wake up one day and realized I love you. I felt it during the time when we woke up together in bed for the first time at your place. I felt it when you drove three hours from your parents’ house to my dorm just ‘cause I told you I missed you. I felt it when you stayed up late with me just so you could help me make my flash cards. I—” you look away, suddenly embarrassed at what you’re saying. It’s not like you to say so much. Not like you to show and voice out this extent of your emotion. “I remember the times I felt I loved you for the briefest of moments in the past three months, but lately, I can't stop thinking about it and suddenly, I can’t count on my fingers anymore how many times I felt I love you. I loved you every hour of last week and yesterday I loved you even more.” 
You watch as Jungkook looks at you with parted lips. Awe-struck? You don’t want to hype yourself up too much. So you look away, keeping your eyes focused on his white shirt. 
“And what about today?” Jungkook suddenly speaks. 
You free your bottom lip from your teeth and finally look Jungkook in the eyes. “I love you more than I did yesterday. And tomorrow I’ll do the same.” 
“Fuck.” Jungkook utters, bowing his head. His tone's a mix of incredulity, amusement, and joy at the same time. When he looks up at you again, he looks at you with so much sparkle in his eyes you’re starting to think you’re a fool for not noticing earlier the love they hold for you in them. “I just… wow.” 
Your eyebrows meet in confusion. 
Jungkook chuckles and shakes his head. “I just… I had this huge confession in my head, you know? I– uh– I wrote it in my notes app.” 
Suddenly, the serious atmosphere breaks as you can’t help but laugh. “What?”
With a small pout, Jungkook continues, “I’m not good with words, you know that. So, I had this big confession planned out. I was gonna tell you in detail how much I love you, but after hearing what you just said… I forgot about everything I tried to memorize last night.” 
Now you’re giggling in his lap. Just trying to visualize him typing on his phone while figuring out what to say to you and him studying it, memorizing the lines…
You're so glad it's him you fell for.
“Don’t laugh,” he scolds, but there's a hint of playfulness that lies underneath it. Jungkook inserts his hand under your shirt and starts rubbing the skin of your waist. “Truth is that I was afraid when you started avoiding me. Thought I’d lose you again.” 
His vulnerable confession makes you stop completely. There’s a certain melancholy in his eyes when he mentions it, and you feel like scolding yourself for even causing that. 
“What I did wasn’t the most mature way to go about it. I’m sorry,” you start. Sighing, you adjust yourself on his lap to get more comfortable. “Uh… I guess I was just embarrassed and wanted to have time to compose myself.” 
“What were you embarrassed for?” 
There’s heat that spreads to your cheeks. For a brief second, you consider lying, but then you remember honesty. It’s what got you both here. Just being open to each other and communicating. 
“Jungkook, no one wants their first I love you said during sex.” You deadpan. 
“Oh.” He blinks. 
At that, you can’t help but roll your eyes. “Exactly.” 
“What’s wrong with that, though?” Jungkook furrows his brows. But his tone borders on teasing when he continues, “You know what they say? Make a girl cum one and she’ll love you, make a girl cum twice and she’ll actually tell you she loves you.” 
“Oh my god.” you groan, jabbing at his chest slightly and taking off your legs off the couch so that you stop straddling him.
Jungkook bursts into laughter and is quick to grab your waist, effectively pulling you back to him again. It results in you falling haphazardly into his lap, which he takes as an opportunity to cage you in a hug and guide you on your back to hover on top of you. 
“I’m kidding, baby,” he whispers against your cheek. “I’m kidding.” 
You inhale a sharp breath when he starts kissing along your jaw. “Good.” 
“I really appreciate you for saying all those things. I wish I can be as eloquent as you,” He tips your jaw with his fingers so that you look at him. “You’re a poet, __.” 
That makes you smile. You secretly like when he calls you by all these petnames... but the way your name rolls of his tongue just hits a lot more different.
“As long as you love me back, Kook.” you say, pushing his bangs off his forehead so that you can look at his face wholly. 
“I love you.” He confesses, kissing your lips.
“I love you too.” you smile. 
Jungkook pecks your lips one more time and suddenly follows it up with another one. Soon, you’re a giggling mess underneath him on the couch when he keeps it up until it tickles. 
“Jungkook,” you whine, wriggling under him and avoiding his mouth.
This only makes Jungkook chuckle in the crook of your neck, halting his cute assault on your lips. When the high of the laughter comes off, you feel a wet trail of kisses down to the base of your neck, and suddenly, Jungkook’s hands are under your shirt, rubbing along the bare skin of your waist. While he peppers open-mouthed pecks on your neck, his fingers trail upwards until they’re on your bare tits. 
“Oh,” you let out a low moan when his palm squeezes around the flesh.
It earns a groan from Jungkook, who presses himself closer to you. And it’s when you feel the growing need on his crotch area – his dick poking your stomach as he stays lapping up your neck. 
“Jungkook,” you call him again. It takes Jungkook a few seconds to look up at you. When he does, his long hair is a mess on his head and his eyes are hooded in that drunken-like state, lips wet from his previous ministrations. 
“Hm?” He hums, gives both your boobs a good squeeze again, making you sigh out. Jungkook continues to touch you, fondling your breasts in his hand as he starts kissing up your jaw instead. 
“I want you.” you whisper against the air, closing your eyes at the sensation of his touch. 
He feels so good on you. You want to take off your stupid clothes.
“Shit,” Jungkook hisses, giving an involuntary thrust against your crotch that made you both groan. “Fuck. I want you, too, baby— god, let me just—” 
You whine when he breaks away from you, but you watch in awe as he makes quick work of kneeling in between your legs, peeling off the white shirt from his body with one arm from the back in a swift motion. He throws it on the floor and swipes his hair out of his face, and in that brief moment, with his toned abdomen and inked arm, you nearly melt.
“Can I take off your shorts?” He asks, but he already has his fingers hooked over the bottom you’ve changed into when you got into his apartment. Giving him a nod, you help him in taking off the garment by lifting your bum off the sofa. Jungkook, ever the expert in the art of taking off your clothes, does it quick, the shorts landing on the floor together with his shirt, forming a small heap. Bottoming out, he takes your thighs in the crook of his elbows and scoot your body closer to his. The angle is a bit awkward from where you lie, and Jungkook makes your cheeks burn when he turns his head to the side to kiss your knee. “So beautiful, baby. Your legs are so smooth.”
“Stop talking,” you say, embarrassed. 
Jungkook chuckles at your reaction, already used to it. His face leans even closer and soon he has the tip of his nose on your panty-cladded core. Like clockwork, he takes a subtle sniff, closing his eyes for a little while at the scent, gripping your thighs tighter at the action. 
If you weren’t a heating mess before, you’re near on combustion now. Surely, Jungkook knows what this does to you. 
“You smell so good. Such a pretty girl,” he grunts. Then, he presses a kiss to your pussy which makes your breath hitch. 
“Jungkook,” you let out a whine for the nth time. “Don’t tease.” 
He shushes you out, clicking his tongue as if you did something wrong. 
You capture your bottom lip in your teeth. Jungkook cups your jaw so you can look at him when he says, “Be patient, princess. I’ll give you what you want. Always.” His voice is gentle and soft, and you know he means it. 
Still, you give him a pout. 
“I wanna fuck.” 
He chuckles, low and sounding so attractive when he brings his fingers through his hair again. It doesn’t help that you can clearly see the outline of his dick getting bigger inside his grey sweats. Damn those joggers for real. 
“Okay,” Jungkook smiles down at you. “Take your shirt off.” 
You make quick work of removing your shirt off to reveal your naked body to him. At this point, only your underwear and his pants are the only things keeping you apart. 
As usual, Jungkook zeroes in on your body instantly, paying the most attention to your tits. According to him, they’re two of his most favorite things in the world and as much as you’d like to call bullshit on that, it really does seem like he’s not joking about it at all. 
“Oh, baby,” Jungkook brings your legs down gently, sliding on top of your body and hovering as he quickly fondles your boobs with his huge palms. “Fuck, you’re so soft.” He says, pressing a kiss to your cleavage. Not wasting any more time, he latches his tongue around a nipple, and you automatically hold onto his head for support when the sensation nearly knocks you off the couch.
Despite that little movement from you, Jungkook continues to lap at your breasts. Licking and tugging at your nipple to get it hard, paying attention to the other one by pinching it and simultaneously squeezing. As seconds pass, Jungkook alternates between your breasts, and as he does so, you feel your core starting to heat up, your need growing bigger. 
“B-baby,” you sigh out, gripping his hair tighter which makes him grunt. “I want you.” 
“I know, baby, I know.” He whispers against your skin. You’re about to whine some more when Jungkook finally leaves your chest to pepper kisses down your stomach. When he gets near your nether region, he guides your legs to hook over his shoulder. “These gotta go.” He says about your panties, and you’re more than willing to help him take it off you. 
The moment it's no longer on you, Jungkook hisses at the sight, head leaning down to finally plant his mouth on your pussy. 
The first lick feels ecstatic just like it always does. With Jungkook lapping up a big stripe over the length of your core, you keep your bucking to a minimum, holding onto his hair instead.
“Taste so fucking good, I can never get enough of you,” he says before he dives in again. Jungkook has this thing when he eats pussy. He always does it like he’s making out with your mouth, his tongue prodding at every seams, wrapping your labia around his lips and being messy with it.
Jungkook breaks away for a while as you hear a sound of spit, followed by the cold sensation of his saliva dripping down to your hole. Soon, you feel Jungkook’s thumb beginning to rub your clit, resulting in a ragged breathing from your lungs. 
“F-fuck,” you moan, tightening your hold on his hair you’re sure you’re pulling on his scalp. 
“You’re so fucking wet for me. So sensitive,” Jungkook says as he picks up the pace of his thumb. “Ain’t that right, pretty girl? All for me, right? This is all for me, hm?” 
“Y-yes!” you squeak out when you feel him prodding his tongue at your entrance again. His finger is fast against your sensitive bud, with his tongue lapping up the juices that eagerly come out of your hole. Jungkook makes out with your pussy like he would with your mouth, and with the tip of his nose touching your skin at this proximity, you can't say you’re not close to the edge. And embarrassingly so – because he’s just gotten started and you already feel like cumming.
“Sh–shit,” Jungkook hisses. He shifts his thumb with his tongue this time in stimulating your clit, using two fingers instead to stretch your pussy out open just so he can see the way it throbs and flutters at his every action. It’s a sinful sight, really, the way you’re so open and wet for him. 
Soon after, Jungkook’s getting a little more aggressive in the way he pushes his head closer to your core, jaw working to devour your mound, two digits inserting themselves in your aching hole that somehow satisfies your need to be filled at the very moment. 
And you’re a panting mess beneath him – trying so hard to muffle the moans from your mouth. Jungkook’s gotten a total of three noise complaints for the past 4 months you’ve been fucking at his place – and even though he tells you not to worry, you find that it’s hard to believe when the one time that you got to ride in the elevator with his neighbor, she looked at you both like she knew you’ve done something. 
Never again. 
As if having read your thoughts, Jungkook breaks away for a while to say, “Don’t hold back, gorgeous. Let me hear those pretty moans of yours.” 
Your cheeks burn with heat as you see his wet jaw and plump lips when you glance down. When your gazes meet, Jungkook inserts his middle and ring fingers in his mouth, and when he pops them back out all wet with his saliva, he pushes them into your hole, lax in his movements, looking right into your eyes as he does so. 
“Oh my god,” you gasp, holding onto his wrist automatically when he pumps his digits into you faster than his pace earlier. 
“There,” Jungkook smirks. “Moan for me, angel.” 
“J-jungkook– oh my god– ah–!” 
Jungkook goes back to leaning his head down and soon enough, his mouth is back on your pussy, simultaneously sucking your clit and licking around your labia, all the whole sliding his fingers in and out of you, you can feel yourself dripping down the leather of his couch. 
“Fuck,” you sigh out, suddenly feeling overstimulated. 
Jungkook picks up his pace and you feel a sting on the sides of your eyes as the pleasure begins to build up. Your hold on his wrist falls off and as if he knows exactly what you’re looking for, he reaches for your hand with his free one, interlocking your fingers together as you see him look up at you while he eats you out. 
“Oh god,” you mewl, reaching down with your other arm to swipe his fringes off his forehead so you can see him better. 
Jungkook stares intently at you as you do the same watching him licking your core enthusiastically. You let your head fall back at a particularly delicious lick, and soon after, you feel that familiar zap that starts on your toes that goes right up to your stomach. 
“K-kook,” you call pathetically, swallowing the lump in your throat. It feels somewhat dry at this point. Closing your eyes, you focus on the sensation of his tongue flicking your clit, saying, “I’m cumming.” 
Jungkook keeps his movements of your pussy, not relenting even when you grab his hair a little too tight, and you feel like you’re breaking off his fingers’ joints by the way you’re gripping it so hard.
“I’m cum– there, fuck, that feels so good– I’m cumming!” 
The knot in your stomach snaps and you feel a gush of wetness coming out of your pussy when it does so. You hear Jungkook groaning in between your legs, his licking becoming more messy as you feel him use three fingers to rub over your core like a greedy man wanting everything to be his. 
“Jungkook…” you sigh out, your fingers easing their hold onto his, already feeling sensitive after your release. You look down at Jungkook only to see the crown of his head as keeps lapping up your wetness. He hums in your pussy and you know you can’t keep him off there for awhile so you wait, running your fingers through his hair soothingly, feeling bad for almost ripping it out awhile ago. “Kook, I’m sensitive.”
“Hm.” He hums to acknowledge you. He licks one last stripe before he lets go, easing off your thighs on the sofa and trailing kisses on your stomach and breasts until he’s eye level to you. “Love how you taste,” he says, kissing you, and your cheeks burn with heat when you feel your orgasm off his mouth. When he breaks the kiss, he looks at you with a smile you can only identify as lovesick. “I love you.” 
That makes you melt. 
You thought it would feel weird to hear him say it. But you think about the future and how there would be more like this, with Jungkook telling you he loves you in more shared random moments and you can’t help but mirror the smile he has on his stupid handsome face. 
“I love you.” you say, initiating another kiss. 
When Jungkook presses his body to you, that’s when you feel his cock poking into your stomach. You assume he’s even more rock hard now, given the previous events. 
Sneakily inserting your hand between your bodies, you try to reach for the bulge in his pants and when you take a hold of his dick, Jungkook grunts. 
“Babe,” he whines and breaks away from your lips and buries his face in the crook of your neck instead.
“It’s completely unfair how you still have your pants on while I’m completely naked.” You say, palming him through his sweats. You feel Jungkook tense above you, and when you give him a particularly hard squeeze, he retaliates with a bite on your shoulder that makes you squeal. “What the hell was that for?” 
“For teasing me,” Jungkook says, finally looking at you. He grabs your arm, kisses the side of your wrist before he hauls himself off you completely, planting his feet on the floor while you lay there on the couch bare and cold. But that doesn’t last long as you feel him picking you up with ease — bridal style. 
“Jesus,” you bury your face in his chest out of embarrassment. You’re all naked and he’s carrying you towards his bedroom in this ridiculous position. 
Meanwhile, Jungkook just laughs and as he reaches his bedroom, he closes the door lightly with his foot. 
“I’m not done with you yet,” He says when he puts you down on the mattress. He has that smarmy smirk on his face as he gets out of his grey sweatpants slowly. You’ve had the inkling he wasn’t wearing any underwear considering that it felt like there was not that much of a barrier when you held them there earlier – but it still takes your breath away when he’s left completely in his naked form, stiff and red-tipped cock standing to attention in his lower abdomen. Arching a brow at you, he trudges over to the edge of the bed and with the deep timbre of his voice, he calls you, “Scoot over here, love.” 
The new endearment definitely catches you off guard. Love. Is that something he’s gonna be calling you from now on? 
You definitely don’t mind. 
You follow his instructions and let your body move closer towards the bottom, making Jungkook hum in approval. 
“That’s a good girl.” Suddenly, Jungkook yanks your legs to his direction and you gasp in surprise, only to realize the position you’re both in. 
He’s standing right over the edge of the bed while he guides your legs to rest over his shoulders.
Jungkook and you have tried a lot of positions since you established your thing, but surprisingly, this has never been one of them and you find yourself curious as to what he’ll do next. 
His tattooed bicep flexes as he trails his finger up your naked thighs, making the hairs on your body tingle, especially your pussy which is all bare for his own viewing. Nibbling on your bottom lip, you watch as Jungkook turns his head to the side, and a gasp catches in your throat when he begins kissing up your calf. When his mouth nears your toes, you nearly yank it out of his hold. 
“K-kook,” you stammer, but all Jungkook does is pay you a momentary look and a non-committal hum, turning back to your feet again where he presses a tentative kiss to your big toe. When he feels you wriggle it in his hold once again, he turns to you with furrowed brows. You look away. “It’s uhm…” 
When you don’t say anything, Jungkook fills you in. “You don’t like it?” 
You feel your cheeks burning even hotter. Fucking hell. 
“No– I mean. Uh. I don’t know?” You knit your brows, confused yourself. You’ve never really thought about dabbling into the more adventurous aspect of sex but Jungkook has changed that ever since – right now, though, what he’s trying to do is confusing you. You’re sure you’ve never thought about feet and sex at the same sentence – but when Jungkook kissed your toes, that might have— 
Oh god. No freaking way he’s trying to give you a foot kink. 
“That’s okay,” Jungkook smiles at you warmly. “I was just gonna kiss them, baby. I love every part of you—” he presses a kiss back to your calf again. Staring deep into your eyes, he tells you gently, “But I’m not gonna do anything you don’t and won’t like, love.” 
It seems like the new unlocked petname is doing all things because you could just feel the sudden gush of wetness coming out of you as soon as he said that. Jungkook must’ve noticed, paying a quick look to your pussy and scoffing in amusement as he sees it. 
“You like that? Love? Hm?” He caresses your thighs again, his other fingers trailing dangerously close to your core. “Seems like me calling you love gets you wet. What about I love you? Does it get you wet just like how it gets me hard when you say it as well?”
When Jungkook presses his thumb to your clit again, you moan, feeling him continue his ministrations. You hold your breath when he begins picking up the pace of his rubbing, and with your position, it gives you an opportunity to spread your legs even more, feeling Jungkook hiss at the action. 
“Fuck. You really are so pretty. I’m so fucking lucky you love me,” Jungkook says. He talks sweet but you hear a sound of spit coming from him to your pussy, his saliva dripping down your core, making you mewl. “I’m gonna make love to you all night. Show you how much I love you.” Jungkook whispers as he pushes a finger into your hole, sliding in and out. “Look at what you do to me, love.” 
You open your eyes to see what he’s talking about, and when you zero in on his cock, it impossibly became bigger, the tip an angry shade of red now. It looks so tight and rigid and veiny that you want to whine to touch it – but you decide to lay still, anticipating his next move. 
“Put it in me,” you say, sounding challenging. 
“I will, just gotta make sure you’re all ready.” Jungkook muses before he inserts his finger once again. It glides in pretty easily, and you’re sure that you’re more than ready to take his cock. 
Grunting, Jungkook pulls you closer and lets go of one of your thighs to grip his dick. He gives it a good squeeze twice before he puts it against the lips of your pussy. 
“Oh god,” you moan at the weight of him. 
“Shit.” Jungkook hisses. You know he’s feeling the exact same way you do. 
When he prods the tip at your entrance, you nearly squeal in delight. Instead, you grip the sheets behind you and look at the way Jungkook’s brows knit in concentration as he grips the base of his cock to enter you fully.
You both moan in unison when the first inch gets inserted, with Jungkook gripping your other thigh tighter and inhaling a sharp breath. Jungkook enters you slowly and arduously, like he’s savoring every second that your pussy swallows every part of his cock. 
“You– fuck– you love a big cock but you’re so fucking tight,” He groans as he begins to slide in the remaining inches, getting both your thighs together again. 
“It’s your fault,” you retaliate, hissing when he begins to move a little inside you. It doesn’t hurt the least bit – you were already way too wet from your first orgasm on the couch of his living room – but in this position, his cock feels deeper and it just feels so damn good. 
“How is it– shit– my fault?” Jungkook grunts, beginning to pick up his pace. “I fuck you almost everyday.” 
“Oh god—” you moan when he hits a little too deep at a particular thrust. “You’re so big, that’s why– fuck.”
“Hah.” Jungkook scoffs, bottoming out to enter you again. “Play with your tits for me, baby. Fuck, I love them so much.” 
You grab your breasts, thankful at the suggestion because they’re bouncing a little from his pounding and you’re sure they’re gonna be sore the next day. 
Needless to say, Jungkook likes what he sees as he continues to slide his cock in and out of you at a steady, slow pace. 
There are two sides to Jungkook when it comes to sex. Sometimes, he likes to do it fast with jackhammer thrusts that makes you question his stamina and strength – not rough, because he told you you’re too much of a pillow princess for that (you rolled your eyes at him so hard and he only laughed at you, telling you it’s actually because he didn’t like the thought of hurting you in any way), and you admittedly love that. It’s what got the words “I love you” out of your mouth in the first place. Intense fucking coupled with intense emotions are a combination you now realize is dangerous – but right now, as he pounds into you slowly, making you feel every ridge of his cock, you realize it’s your favorite. 
There’s something so intimate about the way Jungkook closes his eyes when he seemingly tries his very best to contain his strength as he enters you with his dick. It’s weirdly hot when he inhales a sharp breath to regulate his breathing, brows furrowed in concentration. Like this, you get to feel every moment of where you both started and where you end. 
And when Jungkook leans down on the bed, folding you in half at the action, his dick hits deeper as he plants his palms on the mattress, is cock continuing their ministrations in your cunt. 
He grunts in your hair, grabbing your breast and squeezing it hard in his palm which earns a moan from you. Jungkook looks at you and kisses your parted mouth. 
“I love you,” he says when he breaks away, kissing your cheek. Then the tip of your nose. And then the space between your eyebrows. “I love you so much.” 
You giggle. In the middle of sex. When his cock is snug deep in your pussy. 
“You’re a sap.” you can’t help but cup his face in your hand, grinning at him widely. 
“Where’s my– shit– I love you back?” Jungkook knits his brows, thrusting in and out of you still. He grips your hip with one hand, and there are balls of sweat on his forehead starting to form at the exertion from his body. 
“Of course I love you too, baby,” You say. “Kiss me.”
Jungkook doesn’t wait any more second and leans down to capture your lips into an open-mouthed kiss. You don’t break away until his hips stutter, indicating his impending orgasm. 
He’s usually the one who whispers all those sweet nothings in your ear when you’re on the brink of your climax, but this time around, you tell him how much you love his cock, how it’s made for you, and how much you want to keep making love to him all night – and that’s how he breaks.
“F-fuck,” Jungkook groans as he shoots his hot white orgasm inside you, his voice strained as he finishes off with a few more erratic thrusts. “Oh god.” 
“That’s it, Kook, cum for me,” you whisper against his lips, your legs already sliding off his shoulder. You can’t help but moan against his mouth when you feel him cumming more.
“I love you, angel.” Jungkook says and kisses you again. 
You reciprocate the kiss and hope he feels the smile you have on your lips. 
You don’t really expect to cum again – but then Jungkook suddenly palms your ass and taps both cheeks. 
“Cum for me a second time.” He says, pecking the side of your lips. 
You shake your head. As much as you’d love to, you feel like you’re actually about to break tonight. 
“It’s fine—” 
But Jungkook cuts you off quickly. “Please?” 
And how can you say now when he looks like… that? His sex afterglow puts every man in the movies to shame. And you’re just human prone to giving in – especially when it comes to him specifically.
“Okay.” You say, tapping his cheek with a smile. “How do you want me?” 
“Want you to ride me.” He whispers. “Wanna see your pretty eyes while you’re bouncing on my cock.” 
You ignore the flutter in your heart at his words.
Jabbing at his chest lightly, you roll your eyes at him and let him get off you to position himself against the headboard of the bed. Jungkook grins when you soon plant your folded legs on both sides of him, helping you put his still erect dick inside your still sopping wet pussy. 
You both hiss at the sensation, with you closing your eyes at the way he feels. Meanwhile, Jungkook doesn’t waste any second and dives into your breasts immediately, tugging and sucking at your nipples, squeezing and fondling at the flesh, and moaning when you begin to move up and down on his lap. 
“S-so good,” you mewl, wrapping your arms around his neck, fumbling with the hair on his nape. 
“That’s it, love. Doing so well.” He leaves your breasts in favor of your jaw, peppering kisses there until he makes a stop at your lips again. Jungkook finds solace in holding your hips as you move on your own, and as he watches your closed eyes and parted mouth, he leans back to the headboard, looking at the image of you at the very moment – wishing he could burn it into memory. 
“My god– ah—” You begin to speed up your pace, concentrating on the way Jungkook’s cock seemingly hardens at your every drop and fall. 
Soon after, you feel Jungkook sneaking his hands in your pussy, and when you plant one of your palms on the mattress leaning back, Jungkook rubs your clit to help you reach your climax.
You feel yourself leaking on him from both your orgasms in your pussy earlier, and at the thought of that, you feel another wave of ecstasy that snaps in the bottom part of your stomach.
“Oh my fucking god.” 
You bury your face in Jungkook’s neck the moment you cum, breathing erratically against his skin.
“You did so well, baby,” Jungkook kisses your hair, caressing your head lovingly. “I love you.” 
Humming, you let your body fall lax against his, feeling like your bones just lost all its joints, unable to move. Thankfully, there’s Jungkook to take care of that. When you refused to move, he teases you about being a baby and carries you to the bathroom instead where he tells you to pee while he prepares the shower for the both of you. 
Minutes later when you’re both done cleaning yourselves, you lay in Jungkook’s bed beside each other. Or more like, you lean almost all of your weight on top of him, your legs and arms wrapped around his body with Jungkook’s arms underneath your neck, serving as your pillow. 
“I think I just unlocked a new kink.” Jungkook says, alternating between kissing your forehead and caressing your head. 
“You discover one, like, everyday.” You tell him, eyes shut closed. You’re starting to feel sleepy from everything you did tonight. 
Jungkook snorts. “Fair. But for the record, nothing beats this new kink of mine.” 
“What is it?” 
“The I love you kink.”
Even if you can’t exactly see him, you’re sure he has that stupid cute bunny grin on his face.
Chuckling, you say, “God, you really are so corny.” 
“Hey, can a boyfriend not be turned on when his girlfriend says she loves him?” 
At that, you freeze. Jungkook must’ve noticed because he stops caressing your head. You move away from his chest and lean on your elbow so you can look down at him.
“We’re girlfriend and boyfriend now?” You ask with knitted brows. 
Jungkook looks just as confused. “I mean… yeah?” 
“Oh.” You nod. Looking to the other side of the room, you ponder, “Well, that makes sense.” 
Jungkook looks offended when your gaze falls back to him again. “What do you mean that makes sense? We’ve been boyfriend and girlfriend since you told me you liked me.” 
“You told me you liked me too,” You roll your eyes. “But… really? You think that?” 
Now, Jungkook’s pouting. 
“Wait, you didn’t think we were boyfriend and girlfriend all these months?” 
“Eh…” You think about the past four months since you both established an exclusive relationship with each other. You’ve always thought it was just this unlabeled thing. But apparently… “I guess we are boyfriend and girlfriend.” 
“I literally introduced you to my friends as my girlfriend last month, though?” Jungkook asks. 
You jut your bottom lip out. “I have no idea.” 
He sighs. “Forget about it.” 
“It’s okay. I love you.” You say, blinking at him. 
Jungkook visibly melts at that. 
“I think you just found a new way to get away with anything…” he says, eyeing you suspiciously. 
You snicker and cheekily press a quick kiss to his lips. 
There haven't been a lot of people who have come to your life that became important to you – and you didn’t expect Jeon Jungkook to be one if it – not at all. But what started as a casual relationship turned into more than that, and now you find yourself deeply in love with him – and happily so.
Meanwhile, Jungkook thinks the same as he caresses your hair, staring at your serene face while you sleep in his arms, thinking it couldn’t get any better than this.
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all right reserved © awrkive, 2024. no reposts, translations, modification, and copying allowed. if you enjoy my work/s and have the extra means, please consider supporting me on ko-fi <3
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dottyistired · 3 months ago
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The missing Journal 3 pages in TBOB are so interesting to me in further contextualizing Ford's mindset of shame regarding Bill. We'd gotten a snippet of it in the original J3 release:
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But Bill shows us the less pragmatic motivations behind his actions, the mushy feely stuff he was too embarrassed to properly journal, putting certain series events into new context. Particularly this scene where after a whole episode of dancing around it, he finally opens up to Dipper about the nature of their relationship:
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"Bill wasn't always my enemy, Dipper. I used to think he was my friend, long long ago..."
But does he really tell the full truth here? The cat's out of the bag, Dipper knows they had a deal, there's no reason not to tell everything. But Ford proceeds to explain his reasoning for summoning Bill as a purely practical, scientifically-driven one.
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"I had hit a roadblock on my investigation of Gravity Falls. Until I found some mysterious writing in a cave. Ancient incantations about a being with answers. It warned me not to read them, but I was desperate."
Desperate...for what? Ford would have us believe it was for the sake of knowledge. Yet TBOB shows us that this is the entry immediately preceding his and Bill's first meeting.
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Ford isn't some unfeeling robot powered solely by knowledge, he has human needs. He was lonely, lonely enough to summon a demon for companionship. A companionship so intimate, he describes his meeting Bill as the best day of his life, and laments the periods of absence from him.
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That desire for intimacy is ultimately what drove him, and even with all his dirty laundry laid out he can't admit that part to Dipper. Maybe he doesn't even realize it himself, at least not until the post-Weirdmaggedon sections of TBOB:
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Under the shame of unleashing Bill Cipher's destruction on the world, there's a much deeper shame: that Stanford Pines is not a lone-wolf, unfeeling sci-fi hero, but a fallible human being, capable of illogical sentimentality and longing for approval and (in)human connection. The exact nature of this sentimentality and longing is left to interpretation, but the efforts he goes to to conceal it make me lean towards something beyond platonic. Alex Hirsch's own words might support this:
"I think he is deeply, deeply hiding from his real feelings about things, because at some point early on, he decided that he could run from hurt by achievement and by creation, and has dug that hole so deep that he has no relationships. He doesn't have friendships, he doesn't have romantic relationships, he is someone trapped in a tower of his own mind and estranged. Ford shows none of that. He has sublimated himself romantically so, so deeply. (…) I really thought of Ford kind of like Tesla in that realm.”
TL;DR Ford is up in his feelings about Bill and repressing hard. This is also eerily reminiscent of the self-blame abuse survivors engage in, the hesitance to tell others, and shame over persisting feelings for their abuser.
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coryosbaby · 10 months ago
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Mascara || T. Riddle
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Fandom: ‘Harry Potter’
Pairing: Young! Tom Riddle x fem! Ravenclaw! Reader
。.。 ♡ Content warning . Public sex, praise & degradation, cum play, sub! Reader, dom! Tom
Notes: set in modern day Hogwarts. I never thought i’d want to fuck Voldemort but here we are.
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Your feet patter softly against the tile floors of Hogwarts, a book clutched tightly in your arms as you make your way towards the school’s library. It’s a rainy night, incredibly quiet and empty. The other students are at dinner, and you’ve decided to skip out to study for your OWLs. When you open the big wooden doors to the library, the smell of printed ink and old pages invites you further in.
The first thing you notice, when you close the doors behind you and take sight of the room, is that the librarian, Madam Pince, is no where to be found. She must be on her break.
The second thing you notice is the boy sitting in the darkest corner of the room.
You know of the familiar brunette— of course you do. Who wouldn’t? Tom Riddle is a popular slytherin well known for his cunningness, his intelligence, his ability to speak native tongues— and sometimes, his temper. A ravenclaw yourself, you try to steer clear of him. Slytherins usually don’t take politely to anyone outside of their house. Not to mention the fact that you scored the top of your class, with him coming in close second. You suspect that he hates you for that.
He catches your gaze, brown eyes with the resemblance of a serpent. He looks back down at his book, seeming bored.
You let out a breath of air.
You slide your book into the return bin, timidly moving to the shelf about Potions. Snape has been really hassling you lately on your grades, and you really need to turn your B+ into a perfect A. Your fingertips skim over the leathered binds, reading title after title. A voice behind you makes you jump.
“If you’re studying for Snape’s final, I’d recommend ‘Advanced Potion Making’. It will tell you all you need to know.”
His voice is an angelic lilt, though you know that is not in any way what he resembles. The fact that he’s helping you stumps you into utter confusion, and heat creeps up your neck. You nod to him as you begin searching for the book.
To no avail. Your eyes search every bind, every word, but your focus has been diluted because of Tom speaking to you. He sighs, almost annoyed.
He appears beside you, much to your surprise. You nervously bite your lip as he finds the exact book he recommended and pushes it into your hands.
“Chapter nine. I would’ve thought a girl of your ranking in our class would know this already.”
Your brows furrow, embarrassment coursing through you as he sits back down and resumes his tasks. You nervously fumble with the book.
“Thank you.” You reply, because you had been taught proper manners. He scoffs, flicking through the pages of his book. You can’t read the title, though the cover is quite off put ish and dark. Perhaps he had snuck into the restricted section.
“Don’t.”
You frown, though your mind is peaking with curiosity. He seems rude, but he was trying to help you. Maybe there’s something nice under there, after all. Your body is stiff as you sit across from him at the table, silently pleading to God that the boy across from you won’t put a nasty hex on you.
“You don’t have to be rude, you know.”
It slips out of your lips, quiet and unsure. Tom’s eyes narrow at you.
“And as well as that, you don’t have to sit across from me.”
“Perhaps I want to. Perhaps you need a friend.”
“A friend?” He chuckles dryly, his gaze travelling down to your robes. You try to ignore the heat creeping between your legs. “We aren’t going to be friends.”
His insinuation is thick, dangerous. Your heart pounds out of your chest at this unexpected turn of your study hour. You gulp, looking down at the pages.
“Very well then. But since I’ve already sat down, I might as well continue my book here.”
“Or we could continue this conversation in my dorm room.”
He says it smoothly, with no fear or utmost insecurity.
“What?” You blanch, stuttering on your syllables. Tom smirks.
“A smart girl like you, and you can’t even comprehend a single sentence,” he says, his body beginning to move out of his chair. “‘S pathetic, really…”
You breath hitches as his tall form towers over you. Your fingertips grasp the sides of your chair as he leans in close.
“Tom,” you start, warningly. He quirks a brow.
“No?” He questions, and then after a moment, staring into your doe eyes, it dawns on him. His mouth forms into a grin. “Oh, you want it here, don’t you? You want it right here.”
His lips brush just inches over your pouty lips, and you wonder how in the hell you got into this situation and why this slytherin boy is making such a sudden move on you. But knowing Tom, it’s probably out of boredom. Out of the desire for a hook up.
You don’t mind it. Not really, not anymore, because all your protests are ripped away from you when he presses his lips to yours. It’s not tender or sweet, it’s full of sharp teeth and unfiltered lust. His hands rest on your chin, gripping your head so you can’t escape his kiss— can’t escape him.
Your tongue is about to graze his lips when he pulls away. His fingers grasp your shoulder and pull you up to your feet. You stumble, your legs shaky from just a couple of kisses. You gasp when he spins you around and presses your face against one of the nearest bookshelves. His big hands wrap around your wrists and hold them behind your back.
“I don’t want to hear any complaints from you. Do you understand me?” He whispers, his hands reaching down to lift up your robes. “If I do, I’ll leave you here drenched, your clothes gone, with your holes freshly fucked and on display for the entire school to see. Do you understand me?”
You nod instantly. You know that these aren’t empty threats; when Tom says he’s going to do something, he’ll do it.
When he pulls up your robes, taking in the sight of your pretty pink thong, he lets out a sharp breath.
“Prepared, weren’t you?”
You let out a whine, knowing that no, this wasn’t intentional. Tom just caught you on a specific type of day. But looking on it now, maybe the universe was being in your favor when you decided to pick out the flimsy undergarment.
Tom slips the hem of your robes into your hands.
“Hold it.” He commands, and you’re quick to comply.
His hardness presses against you, clothed still but his robes are lifted so he can rut against you in his briefs. It isn’t long before he’s pulling them down past his thighs, his cock sprinting up into the air as he places himself against you once again. You can’t help but drip with need, canting your hips back against him. His cock presses in between the seam of your ass, and you rub against him like a bitch in heat.
And just like a bitch in heat, you purr.
“Tommy..” you let out, and his grip on your hips tighten. “Please?”
He scoffs at the nickname, though his bottom lip is caught roughly between his teeth and he’s trying to contain himself. He wraps his hand around his awaiting length, parts your thighs with the other, and slides his dick up against your throughly aroused pussy.
He’s warm, sticky. You wish you could’ve seen him before this, seen that thing that feels oh so heavy between your legs, but it’ll have to wait. Hopefully, there will be a next time.
When he slides in, it stretches you obscenely. This isn’t your first time, but there’s a burning sensation as he enters you. He’s got the perfect amount of thickness and length to pull a moan deep from your throat.
He doesn’t start slow. His hips smack against yours at a rapid pace, small grunts leaving his silky lips as he uses you like a common whore. Your hands grip your robes and the bookshelf at the same time, trying to keep steady as Tom fills you to the brim. He noses along your jaw and leaves wet, open kisses there. You mewl when he bites down harshly and sucks a mark into your skin.
“Such a tight little cunt you have,” Tom breathes, his fingertips bruising your hips. “Look at you, such a slut for my cock. Does it feel good? Tell me, tell me how it feels.”
Your thighs squeeze him, your mouth gaping open in utter ecstasy. Your words are caught in your throat, but Tom is quick to force them out of you with a spank to your ass. You moan, your forehead pressing against the bookshelf’s wooden edge.
“Yes! Yes, it feels so good…” you slur, entranced by the spice of his cologne and the feeling of his girthy length splitting you open. He grunts, bucking his hips into you with vigor.
“And I bet it’s the best you’ve had, isn’t it? All those other boys can’t do it for you. I’m the only one that fucks you this good.”
It’s true, and when his cockhead hits a spot deep inside you that has you keening, your legs quiver and your brain turns to jelly. Tom’s fingers place themselves around your neck and squeeze so hard that your vision blurs at the edges, and you’re enthralled by the fear that courses through your veins. He’s playing your life in his hands like it’s a shiny new toy.
He fucks you like a madman as you gasp and beg for air. Tears spill out of your eyes, salty and wet and Tom takes notice.
“Crying?” He sneers, pounding you so hard that you’re sure the bookshelf will leave bruises as it presses against you. “You’re pathetic. A pathetic, filthy little girl.”
“Mmmhhh..” you cry out. Your eyes roll back as you utter incoherent sounds. He growls.
“Do you want me to cum inside you?” And then, with a harsh grip on your hair, “I want to hear you say it. Beg me. Beg me to fill you, whore.”
Your eyes shut tight, and your hands clasp around his wrists as he loosens his grip on your throat.
“Please,” your voice is a gasp as you finally get oxygen unto your system. “Please, Tom, f-fill me up. Cum inside me.”
A small, throaty groan escapes his lips, and with one last desperate thrust he’s spilling balls deep inside your drooling cunt. His cum spills over the cusp of your used entrance, and when he’s done fucking it into you he pulls out with a sharp exhale.
You can feel his cum spill out of your raw fucked hole, the creamy fluid dribbling down your thigh and dripping onto the carpet below. Your clit throbs mercilessly, still devoid of any attention, but Tom is quick to put a stop to that. He drops to his knees, then, and it’s a surprising gesture that you didn’t expect. He doesn’t seem like the type to get on his knees for anyone, let alone you. But his tongue lolls out of his mouth as he spreads your knees and catches his cum into his awaiting mouth. He licks up your hole, circling your clit with practiced precision. You let out a guttural sound when you hear the obscene noises of the cum spilling out of you, along with Tom’s mouth slurping at your cunt vigorously. He works at you over and over, and you clench when you feel yourself nearing your high. It’s almost embarrassingly quick, but you’ve been denied so long that you need to do it and you need to do it now.
“I’m going to…” you gasp out, as he rubs circles into your clit. He lets out a loud grunt against you, his mouth working harder. “I’m cumming—god, I’m cumming!”
Your orgasm washes over you, hits you like a tidal wave in the middle of an incredibly large ocean. Tom works his tongue and lets you ride out your high, and he sighs and pulls away from your pussy when you come down.
He’s gathered enough arousal to fill his mouth generously, and he kisses you flat on the lips. His tongue slides against yours and you can taste your shared arousal on him. You whimper, licking desperately at his salty spend, and it’s messy and sloppy and absolutely depraved. His teeth nip at you as you swallow it all down.
You’re dizzy, on shaky legs. You turn around, finally getting to see Tom’s face coated in your slick and his cum. He grins at you, and something twists in your gut so primal you feel you might burst.
“Better get to studying, Miss Y/L/N,” he says. “It’d be a shame if this missed study session made you fail your OWLs.”
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valsverse · 1 month ago
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‼️ MY EXPERIENCE WITH @girlkisser13
🚨 HARASSMENT & PLAGIARISM 🚨
i want to address a serious issue that has recently come to light regarding a user in the fanfiction community (@girlkisser13) with a concerning history of plagiarism and ongoing harassment. this situation involves not just the act of stealing someone else's work but also a troubling pattern of aggressive behavior that has surfaced, indicating a lack of accountability and growth. it’s crucial for us writers and fans to stand together against such actions to maintain a supportive and respectful community for all creators. with that being said, read below. transparency is key, so i want to share the full context of this situation, including all relevant screenshots. underlined words/sentences include links to posts that are relevant to the incident, so i encourage you to check them out. (if you've recently received a message from an anonymous user about this situation, click here)
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SECTION 1 : The Original Plagiarism Incident + Backstory
on june 3, 2023, i was notified by an anonymous user in my inbox that an account called girlkisser14 (now known as girlkisser13 after deactivating her old account) was plagiarizing my work. she repeatedly lifted sections of my writings and headcanons, merging them into her own posts. (note that i pretty much exclusively write for the percy jackson fandom.) after reaching out to her privately i discovered that i could no longer view her posts. at first, i thought she had taken her account down, but it turned out she had just blocked me. by june 5, 2023, i decided to create a post detailing the situation, which you can read here. shortly after, she contacted me, and we managed to come to a resolution. it seemed like a good opportunity for her to acknowledge her mistakes and learn from them. i updated my original post to reflect that the issue had been resolved. later on, she messaged me saying she couldn’t cope with the backlash. while i’m unsure if she was genuinely receiving hate, i felt sympathy for her situation. she asked me to take down the post, but i declined as accountability is important to me and i didn't feel comfortable with just erasing history. soon after, she deactivated her account.
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although she deactivated her original account, she shortly after created a new one. i was notified by a different anon about this because her posts were moved to the new account, and some still included my work—presumably by accident. from that point on, she became known as girlkisser13, which can be confusing given her original username was girlkisser14. initially, she missed a few paragraphs of my work, as mentioned earlier, which prompted me to make a post about it (as seen in screenshot 2). however, she reached out to me, and we clarified everything through direct messages. after that, all seemed well!
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however, things would get much worse from here. (this main character ahh dialogue bro.. 💀)
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SECTION 2 : Account Tries a New Persona, Still Fails at Not Harassing Me.
(september 21st, 2024) an anonymous account messaged me with the following:
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to be honest, i was completely baffled. i had completely forgotten about this issue, and out of nowhere, someone decides to bring it back up. it struck me as strange because… who gets so personal over something like this?
the user, which goes by the handle 'multifandombisexual13' also sent the exact same message directly to me, which made it clear that the anonymous message came from them, as shown.
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first of all, the usernames are incredibly similar. both have the number 13, and girlkisser13 is a multifandom account. if you look at their profile, you'll notice they only repost stories from girlkisser13. even on the "check out these accounts" sidebar, there's only one account listed: girlkisser13. this is because they only repost content from that account.
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let’s be real—this isn’t the behavior of a genuine fan. who goes through that much trouble? it’s obvious that this is girlkisser13 under an alternate handle.
i raised these concerns with the user, and i made sure to respond in a civil manner.
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they didn’t respond to my initial message and only replied after I reached out to girlkisser13. i sent her a message about this situation. (just to be clear, this user and girlkisser13 are the same person.)
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the user then responded at 4:38 PM. note that her main account, girlkisser13, replied to my message at 4:42 PM. (less than 5 minutes apart.) classic. (dates and times are included right under the text.)
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if it wasn’t obvious by now, this person has been harassing me from their alt while pretending to be an innocent bystander on their main account. it’s like they’re playing both sides—using one account to send nasty messages and the other to act like they have no clue what’s going on. it’s honestly ridiculous and kind of sad at this point. (you will most likely have to zoom in to read the screenshots.)
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you get the idea: this account goes off on personal jabs, claiming i have some need for control and a massive ego just because i refused to take the post down. i defended myself (obviously), but then she decided to accuse me of being jealous. (???)
i’ve made it clear SO many times—the post stays up for accountability. but no, she’s built up this entire fictional scenario where i’m obsessed with who’s getting more notes or attention. i promise you, i literally could not care less.
every single message is her droning on about “jealousy” or my supposed "ego and control issues," but never once acknowledging the actual point. it’s about holding people accountable for their actions. this isn’t a competition or a takedown—it's about transparency and honesty in the community. and to try and reduce it to some petty jealousy battle? that’s honestly ridiculous and completely out of touch.
like, she’s sitting there imagining i’m losing sleep over someone’s follower count on tumblr of all places. does she even realize how absurd that sounds? i'm a high school student who posts fanfic maybe once a month in a small fandom. tumblr is not my life, and there's definitely nothing here for me to be jealous of.
i don’t care how well someone is doing, i care about transparency and keeping things honest in the community. now, let’s address the obvious here. it’s super weird for another account to be going so hard defending a situation they supposedly have no part in. like, who does that? no one would go to these lengths unless they were personally connected, right? i brought up this whole issue in these screenshots below:
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funny how they only stopped harassing me once i mentioned, at the end of my paragraph, that i’d happily make this public. up until that point, it was nonstop. i kept pressing them on whether they were connected to girlkisser13 (and if you somehow forgot—yes, this account and girlkisser13 are the exact same person). it was obvious, but i just wanted them to admit it.
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it was around this time that i decided to message her main account, girlkisser13, to clear things up. i figured it was best to go straight to the source and get some clarification, but of course, things only got more suspicious from there.
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SECTION 3: Ongoing harassment just a heads-up to pay attention to the account names at the top so you know who I'm messaging.
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i like how i don't even have to comment on this part lmao. i sent the situation to girlkisser13 at 11:01 PM, and then at 11:39 PM, their other account decides to confront me about it.
anyways, i tried to get some honest answers from girlkisser13, but it was all just denial. at the very least, i asked her to reach out to the "other user" to stop the harassment.
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at this point, girlkisser13 decided to backtrack and throw in an apology. i mean, i still firmly believed they were the same person, but honestly? i was just so exhausted from the whole ordeal that i thought, “whatever, let’s just agree and move on.”
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SECTION 4: The Slip Up: GirlKisser13's Attempt at Damage Control
almost immediately after the conversation shown before, i received 13 messages TOTAL in my inbox, all in rapid succession, so obviously, they were all from the same person. i won't show them all because they're essentially the same. each one harassed me about my plagiarism post still being up, mentioning girlkisser13, and accusing me of jealousy in the same short, lowercase writing style. i brought this issue up to girlkisser13.
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the first slip-up happened when I received a message from her alternate account, multifandombisexual13. up until that point, all the messages had come through anonymously, but it seems she forgot to enable the anonymous option this time.
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shortly after, i got a message in the same style from her main account, girlkisser13. need i say more?
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so, naturally, i sent the screenshot over to her main account, just to see what she'd say. and what did i get in return? excuse after excuse. it was honestly kind of impressive how quickly she could come up with new stories to cover her tracks. each response was more outlandish than the last, trying to justify what was blatantly obvious.
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my brother sent that message!" yes—because your brother just happens to have access to your account. yes, because your brother happens to also be on tumblr, spending his time catching up on the latest percy jackson fanfiction drama... 💀 the sheer absurdity of it all. the pathological lying is honestly embarrassing at this point.
and, of course, the apologies only start rolling in after she's been caught—clearly just an attempt to redirect the drama and save face.
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embarrassing...
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SECTION 5: FINAL THOUGHTS—My Brain Hurts
in conclusion, this user does not deserve a platform on this app. she has failed to learn from her past mistakes and has clung to an incident that happened over FOUR MONTHS AGO. it’s time for accountability in our community.
harassment and deception have no place in spaces dedicated to creativity and expression. when individuals prioritize personal vendettas over respect and integrity, they tarnish the very essence of what fandom is meant to be.
it’s crucial that we foster an environment where originality is celebrated and where creators feel safe to share their work without fear of retaliation or harassment.
i highly encourage you to read everything i’ve shared and form your own opinion on the incident, but now you know my point of view.
ADDRESSING COMMON QUESTIONS
1. Isn’t this just a personal dispute?
while this situation is personal to me, it reflects broader issues within our fandoms. it’s not just about my experience; it’s about creating a community that values respect and integrity. we should all feel safe to share our work without fear of harassment or plagiarism. no one should feel comfortable stealing others' hard work or bullying creators into silence.
2. Why are some of the photos lower quality than others?
tumblr has a 30-photo limit, which meant i had to manually combine certain screenshots in a photo editor to get everything in. i also wanted to save space to make sure the most important screenshots could be posted in their highest quality. this is especially noticeable in the banter between me and her alternate account (see Section 2).
3. Why didn’t you just take down the post like she asked? Are you really jealous of her like she accused you of?
• absolutely not. i kept the post up for accountability. this was never about ego, jealousy, or a desire for control, as she accused me of—it’s about making sure people are aware of what happened and holding someone responsible for their actions. removing the post would allow her to escape the consequences of her behavior, which isn’t fair to me or anyone else she may target in the future. trying to turn this into a jealousy issue is a distraction tactic, and honestly, it’s irrelevant to the conversation. it’s not about followers or popularity—it’s about principles. 4. Why make this public? • because i gave her chances to handle this privately, and she chose to continue the harassment. this could have ended quietly, but she made the decision to escalate it. i’m not going to stay silent about someone who continues to lie, harass, and try to manipulate others.
5. Is it really that big of a deal?
yes. i know this whole situation is a bit silly, but plagiarism and harassment are serious issues, whether they happen online or in real life. it’s not just about fanfiction; it’s about respecting people’s work and holding individuals accountable when they cross boundaries.
to wrap this up, if you have any questions or concerns about the situation, feel free to reach out to me. i’ve tried to lay everything out as clearly as possible while trying to get this information out as quickly as possible, but i’m open to any clarifications or further discussion. i honestly don’t know how far this will reach or how many people will see it, but I think it’s important to at least try. for accountability’s sake, i’m tagging all the fandoms she’s active in, so all people can be aware of what’s been happening. hopefully, this will help set a standard in our community for respecting each other’s work and holding people accountable when they cross the line. i understand that some may want to defend her, but it’s crucial to consider the pattern of behavior exhibited. defending someone who has repeatedly shown disrespect for others’ work can enable harmful actions. i encourage people to look at the evidence and form their own opinions rather than simply siding with someone based on personal feelings.
thank you for your time!! ©valsverse— do not steal, edit, or repost my works. plagiarism is prohibited.
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susiephone · 2 years ago
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wtf is dracula daily?
i’ve seen a couple people ask this question on my posts about it, so i thought i’d go ahead and clear it up here!
ok so, the classic horror novel “dracula” is an epistolary novel - that means it’s told via letters, diary entries, ship logs, and news articles. (technically the term “epistolary novel” refers to works told solely through letters or emails, but many have expanded it to mean any work that is told via in-universe documents, hence why diaries and logs often get included as well. “frankenstein” is another classic example; the whole framing device is robert walton is recounting the story he heard from victor to his sister via letter. a modern example would be “several people are typing,” which is told via slack messages, or “the perks of being a wallflower,” which is told via letters from charlie to his anonymous pen pal, which is functionally more like you’re reading his diary.)
because of the nature of the narrative, we actually know the exact day nearly everything in dracula happens - the letters, news articles, diary entries, etc. are all dated.
“dracula daily” is a substack project where the novel is broken up into parts, with people who are subscribed to the project getting emails every day something in dracula happens - for example, the novel opens with jonathan harker’s journal entry on may 3, so on may 3, subscribers are emailed that entry. the action of dracula takes place from may 3 - november 6, plus an epilogue set some years later. the project started in 2021 (i think), but fucking BLEW UP in 2022, and they’re doing it again this year! lots of us are very excited - especially people like me who fell behind last time.
why not just read the book?
valid! due to some parts of dracula being told out of chronological order, dracula daily does reorder some things. for example, the first section of dracula is told entirely from jonathan harker’s pov, then the second section switches the pov to mina murray. their sections have some overlap in the timeline, so dracula daily jumps back and forth between their perspectives.
if you want to read the book as bram stoker intended, dracula daily may not be for you. but for a lot of people (myself included!), it breaks up a very long text into easily digestible chunks (....mostly. there is one entry that is 10k words), and the fact that it’s a big project means there are a lot of people reading along with you.
i think there’s also something valuable about experience the slow revelation of wtf is going on along with the characters. the book which you might otherwise get through in a few days is stretched out into months of suspense and agony as you wait for the other shoe to drop, and it’s great.
plus, the whiplash between “jonathan harker’s neverending horror” vs “lucy is basically on the bachelorette” that you get in dracula daily is very very funny.
how do i sign up?
right here! and if you sign up and fall behind in the emails, no worries - the dracula daily website posts past entries so you can catch up.
what if i prefer audiobooks?
have i got great news for you!
like i mentioned before, i couldn’t keep up with the emails last year. part of it is that it is much easier for me to focus on an audiobook or keep up with a podcast than it is for me to sit down and read, especially with longer entries.
this year, there is going to be a podcast titled “re: dracula” that was inspired by dracula daily. every episode will be a dracula daily entry, with a full voice cast! (seriously, if you listen to british podcasts, you will recognize some of these names. the magnus archives and wooden overcoats girlies are WINNING.) you can find that here.
there is also a podcast called “cryptic canticles” that has an already-completed audiodrama of dracula that i’m told is also extremely good, and was also broken up by date. you can find that here.
why do i keep hearing about paprika/the boyfriend squad/lizard fashion/cowboys?
you’ll see.
oh god am i gonna hear about this nerd shit for the rest of the year
yes. sorry.
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mochinomnoms · 14 days ago
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I don't know if you've already answered this, but how would ptm go if Jade was the one reading Yuu's mind instead? Or if the ability switched over to him for some length of time, how would he use it?
I do have some ideas of how it can get switched over to other people in PTM, I just haven't decided how exactly. Though I have written two short drabbles about Riddle and Azul having Yuu's telepathy for a bit!
I think it would be funny if Jade somehow got their telepathy right around the time that Yuu is at the brink of insanity trying to figure out how to get Jade to confess to them (they can't comprehend doing it themselves, they chicken out).
Perhaps they unintentionally transfer their power one evening to Jade, after a study session, and when they wake up in the morning, they're panicking because they can't hear anyone's thoughts. Originally, this might have been a blessing, but they've gotten so used to it, it's been a habit to talk to their friends discreetly through it, and it's been their one-way ticket into Jade's heart! He might not have even liked them as much as he has without it (nevermind that his feelings were established well before their telepathy developed).
So they're walking around school, immensely distressed and getting spooky by everyone every minute. It's awful, Riddle tries to console them by telling them how much better it's going to be now that they don't have to deal with all of that extra stimulation feeding into their head.
When they talk to Azul about it later on, he surprisingly doesn't seem very surprised about it. He does advise that perhaps they limit their interactions with Jade, though he doesn't say exactly why. It makes sense to them though, they can't act accordingly to how Jade wants them, and if they start acting weird now it will ruin...whatever it is that the two of them have.
Of course, they both are in the same potionology group, so it's hard to avoid him. It's worse when Yev asks that the two of them go alone to the botanical gardens later to forage for some ingredients. You both show up separately, Yuu arriving before Jade.
They hate not being able to hear anyone, it would be so easy to sneak behind them. But really, they just are still distress about not being able to hear Jade.
Ugh, should I just be like super cool-faced? Will that throw him off? Maybe I should be cutesy? He likes cutesy, right? UGH! WHY DO I EVEN CARE NOW???
Yuu kicks at a rock in their path, huffing and stomping over to the magical herbs section.
I didn't even like him that much! Why do I even like him now? He thinks weird lewd thoughts about me and tries to get me alone with him to make them become real! That's weird! That should make me not like him, why do I feel the exact opposite!
They're so deep in their thoughts that they don't hear the footsteps behind them, though if Jade doesn't want to be noticed, then he won't.
Stupid! It's not fair, I want to kiss his stupid face and hold his stupid hand. Why can't he confess first? It's not fair, he's had feelings way longer than me! If he wants me, maybe he should initiate one of his stupid, lewd fantasies instead of just dreaming about it!
Yuu is well aware of the irony in their sentence, but they won't admit it. Not while they're pulling the vervian.
Hmph. My doesn't he take initiative, hmm? H-he's got that stupid long tongue, I've seen it! H-he can kiss me and m-make me all dizzy, a-and scrape those stupid teeth down my neck…Ja-Jade would be gentle…right? O-or maybe he'll be a little mean, and leave a mark as he goes further down and down and—
They choke on a scream as they feel a pair of hands grab them, one around their waist and another grasping their right hand.
“Oya~ You're quite the hypocrite, aren't you?”
Jade was purring in Yuu's ear, his breath fanning over their neck and making them shiver.
“J-Jade! What are you—”
“When I woke up this morning, I thought that perhaps I'd been cursed. It was like I was hearing everyone speak in layers, they'd say one thing, but mean another.”
A shuddering whimper left their mouth, their left hand clasping over, as Jade's lips pressed against the back of their ear.
“Huh? J-Jade this is really in—”
“Azul gave it away, of course. He's never been able to really hide his thoughts from Floyd and I. But add this sudden gift of, what do you call it...telepathy? And he's like a treasure chest that's been forced open and presenting me with a trove of knowledge.”
Yuu froze, icy cold fear coursing their veins as Jade's grip on them tightened. Like he knew that their flight response was gearing to go.
What. He's got—no, he doesn't—
“Yes, my pearl, it's exactly as you think!” Jade sighed, nuzzling into the side of Yuu's neck and inhaling at the bend of their neck, where their pulse was rapidly increasing. “I was surprised, hearing from Azul, that you'd been struggling with this all year. Even more when his mind slipped that you'd been particularly stressed because of me.”
Jade sighed, a sad and deep sigh as he pressed another kiss into their neck, using his nose to push their collar to the side and kiss their shoulder.
“Devastating, isn't it? To know that my beloved, my mate, my pearl was distressed because of me! Aaah, that knowledge just broke my heart...”
Oh. God. Oh god, oh godoh god—
Yuu swallowed, deciding to take a peak at Jade from the corner of their eyes, freezing as Jade's own bi-colored eyes bore into them, a smirk on his lips growing as soon as he noticed them looking.
“At least until I came in here, and heard those delicious thoughts of yours.”
A low chuckle left Jade as he scraped his teeth along Yuu's jaw.
“Would you like me to make the first move? Would you like to to, what was it you're imagining? Take my 'stupid long tongue' and make you 'dizzy with it?' That was it, yes?”
Jade's hand around their waist ghosted down, fingertips grazing down to rub and squeeze at their inner thigh.
“You wanted me to go, how did you imagine? Further down and down with my tongue until...well, you didn't finish that thought, did you? I interrupted you, so...why don't you tell me?”
I-I can't...
“Of course you can, I'm being quite vulnerable with you. Won't you do the same with me, my pearl? I beg.”
Jade's voice turned whiny, meek, pleading as he brought Yuu's hand up to press a kiss to their palm.
“J-Jade, I want you to-to—” Yuu whimpered, finally turning their head to look at Jade, who tilted his head in curiosity and delight.
“Yes?”
“C-can you kiss me? Please?”
His eyes softened, lips slightly opening as he let out a gentle breath.
“Oh, why, of course, my pearl.”
Who was he to deny them. Who am I to deny myself. He thought as he obliged to the simple request and fulfilled both of their wishes.
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heartiis · 1 month ago
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the big apple ꩜ .ᐟ pt.5
pt.1 pt.2 pt.3 pt.4
pairing - ellie x reader
synopsis - you've just moved to nyc and ellie's your new neighbor. she hates you though and you don't know why :((
cw - mean ellie, toxic! ellie, side gig dealer ellie, weed, tattoo artist ellie, texts between reader and ellie, angst, smut
a/n - last part!! bro last part had a bunch of letters which were bigger and I kept fixing it then coming back to see some of them got big again?? it was like playing whac-a-mole I swear. also I just want to say thank you to everyone who read and interacted, it was so nice to share my writing with people who enjoyed it<33
-
Sitting before you was a cappuccino cup with a perfectly formed latte art leaf. You stared at it, slowly inhaling and exhaling the warm, sweet smell. It soothed you, but you could still feel a blade made of pure anxiety stabbing your guts. What were you supposed to do with the cup again?
“Hey!”
You turned your head to see your co-worker holding three iced coffees in his hands, gesturing his head to the pickup counter where a growing crowd of customers waited. It was the afternoon, one of the busiest times for coffee shops.
“Shit,” you muttered, and quickly brought over the cup to the counter and called out the customer’s name.
Your head this week had been either entirely filled with Ellie, that moment in your bedroom with the thumping and moaning, or absolutely nothing but a strong sense of dread you were too fuzzy to understand. And you hated it. You hated how pathetic it made you feel, to have someone who didn’t give a fuck about you occupying your mind 24/7, turning your new life into a mess after only having been in it for a few weeks.
You knew who Ellie Williams was from the start. Dina, one of her best friends, had told you. You knew she didn’t date, didn’t get attached or form romantic connections. It wasn’t like you’d been itching to make things official while you were still talking. You were still getting to know each other. You understood the two of you were not exclusive, and you yourself had not thought of giving a name to your relationship yet.
But you also understood yourself. You knew you’d caught feelings for Ellie because that was how you operated, and because it was Ellie, perfect and strong and raw, with her stupid green eyes and her freckles. The exact type of person you’d imagined you’d fall for. It was achingly, painfully obvious to you where you’d gone wrong. You had let the tiniest seed of hope grow in your heart.
From the way Dina and Jesse had talked about the other girls Ellie involved herself with, it had seemed like she didn’t text them as often as she did you. It hadn’t seemed like she would constantly invite them over, or invite herself over to theirs, or talk until late at night, or give them free weed just so she could get high with them.
But these were all assumptions. Dina hadn’t spoken about the topic since that night, and you hadn’t asked. You two did talk about what had happened the night of the smoke sesh, and about the constant texting and hanging out and occasional sex which had followed, but she never gave you any reason to think this meant more to Ellie than any of her other flings.
The seed in your heart felt like a shard of glass.
-
The walk home was cold and bitter. Your manager had sent you home early because you lacked so much focus she’d thought you were sick. Summer was reaching into Fall, and today was already colder than it should be. Not only that, but you had made the mistake of wearing another of your dresses which only went a little further than your knees and left your ankles bare. You were shivering and feeling glad you were almost home when your gaze fell on the bodega not too far off from your apartment. The bell tinkled as you pushed open the glass door and went straight to the alcohol section, finding yourself some cheap wine.
As you waited for the man at the cash register to ring you up, you stared behind him at the wall of cigarette boxes with graphic images and ‘smoking kills’ labels. You were the same as Dina, who never bought entire packs for herself so she wouldn’t smoke too much. At that point it didn’t matter enough to stop you. You left the bodega with wine and a pack of Marlboro lights, rushing to the elevator, hoping you didn’t come across Ellie.
She’d texted you thrice since that weekend. The first time on Sunday morning, apologizing for not having answered your texts, telling you she was fine. She asked you how you were. You didn’t answer. The second text came on Thursday, asking you if you wanted to hangout, and the last on that same day hours later. A ‘hi’ accompanied with three question marks. It had all been so strange. The lack of texts supplying you with updates on her day or raising questions about yours at the start of the week had made you sure she had, in fact, ditched you. The text on Thursday came as a surprise, but you ultimately knew what she wanted. It was the only thing she had wanted from you all this time. For you to be her fuck buddy.
You couldn’t bring yourself to reply. You couldn’t, because you knew if you did, you’d say yes, and you would go to her apartment and the two of you would have sex because you needed to be next to her so badly that you’d take whatever she gave you, let her have you how she wanted.
So when the elevator opened on your floor and she was nowhere to be seen, you breathed a small sigh of relief. You opened your door and you put your plastic bag from the bodega on the kitchen counter and looked for the corkscrew and singular wine glass. The first portion poured out was thick, three fingers tall. You kicked off your sneakers and downed it quickly as you watched the sky darken from your couch, not daring to come out onto the fire escape which was sure to be all ice-cold metal and biting breeze.
The more you slipped into a tipsy state, the more tears fell from your eyes, until you pushed past that and became the same amount of drunk you had been at that club. Too drunk to mind the cold, drunk enough to crave a smoke and a view of the sunset from the fire escape.
You thumped your feet to the kitchen where you got the Marlboro pack and the Bic lighter you kept in your purse, just in case. An unlit cig on your lips, a half full wine glass in your hands and the lighter interlaced within your fingers, you opened the window and drunkenly stumbled out of it, leaving the glass on the ledge as you flicked on the lighter. The wind and the cold bars of the fire escape against your sock covered feet were a welcome shock to your system.
You took a puff. As you blew it out, you noticed that Ellie was staring at you from her own spot on her window, leaning on the ledge sideways, one leg up. She wore a black jumper and had a pencil and a sketchpad in her hands as well a joint in her mouth. She pinched it with two fingers and puffed out a cloud which flew north, away from you and the sunset.
The two of you said nothing. The sight of her sitting there, the light bathing her in gold and lighting up her eyes was too much to bear. You made a silent prayer that she couldn’t see the redness of your eyes from where you were standing. Then you rushed back to your window, taking the glass in your hands so you could pass without it dropping.
“Hey, wait.”
You froze, half of your body still on the fire escape. There was an urgency to her voice that tugged at you. You wanted to reprimand yourself for being stupid again, but it was no use, you could already feel the glass in your heart smoothing over before it sharpened again, bigger than it was before.
You pulled your body back out of the window and sat on the ledge, taking a drag of your cigarette in search of the nicotine induced feeling of your blood-pressure lowering.
Ellie observed you with knit together brows. When she realized you were waiting for her to speak, she opened her mouth.“Why haven’t you answered my texts?” It was a sentence uttered so softly. It sounded fraught and out of place coming from her, who hadn’t made too much of an effort to contact you.
“I…” you started. “I didn’t think it mattered that much.” You stared at your thighs and the hand which rested there, holding your cigarette.
“Why the fuck not?” Ellie said, her voice flipping from soft and pleading to angry and raw.
Your head snapped to her, then back down, your hands rushing up to dig into your hair. “Just—Please, stop.”
She put out her joint and tossed it along with the sketchpad and pencil into her apartment then stood up, making her way to the railing closest to you. Her hands gripped the metal, knuckles turning white. “Stop? How am I supposed to just stop? I’ve been losing my goddamn mind this week. Why are you ignoring me?”
Hot tears gathered on your eyes, spilling over when you blinked.
“Hey, are you drunk? Are you even fucking listening—“ Ellie’s voice died off when you looked at her and she saw the wetness of your eyes and cheeks. She kept her grip on the railing, but her hunched shoulders slipped and she drew back, standing straighter.
“Hey,” she said breathlessly. “What’s going on?”
Your chest heaved, sucking in a breath only to let it out jagged. Ellie’s eyes were so wide. She was the deer caught in headlights now. The desperation you felt fed into the glass, turning your heart into an irritated and angry wound. It didn’t feel fair, that she should look so worried and broken when you were the one who had been made a fool, the one who had let her affection and hope and yearning become so big it swallowed everything else.
So you went to the railing too, and you let loose all the words piled tight in your throat. “You want to know why I haven’t answered your texts?” You gripped the bar, not caring how frozen and stiff your fingers felt. “Because, Ellie. I heard you fucking that girl that night.” She flinched. “And you know, it’s fine. Dina had already told me how it works with you. And it’s not like we ever agreed on being exclusive. So you did no wrong there. But fuck, It hurt. And I can’t hold it against you. But I also can’t—“ One of your hands flew to your chest, squeezing there at the fabric. You gazed into the distance and shook your head, tears streaming uncontrollably now. “I can’t keep seeing you when I know you don’t feel the same way I do. I have to protect myself.”
When you looked back at Ellie, her eyes were glistening. She stared at you for a second until she stepped back and broke her gaze, rushing through the window into her apartment.
Once she was gone you stepped back as well, a shudder rocking through you. You sat down on your window ledge, defeated. You had stripped yourself bare on that fire escape, made it painfully obvious that you had feelings for her, and in the face of them she had run off.
You were sucking in another drag of the Marlboro light when you heard a knock at your door. You turned your body but stayed where you were, too drunk to think of what to do. Then came three more knocks, hurried and loud. You sprung into action, putting out your cigarette on the kitchen counter, too agitated to think much into it.
You swung open the door, heartbeat coming in quick as you took in the sight of her. Ellie, standing at your door with wet eyelashes and half of her hair in a bun, just the way you liked it.
“Can I come in?” she croaked out.
You nodded and moved sideways, too dazed to speak. She sat on your couch, staring down at the sketchpad in her hands. You pulled up a chair from your dinner table and sat right before her. She lifted it up so you could see. On it were drawings of different items, all in her style. A bottle of wine. A switchblade. Her lighter. An apple split in half, the core of it showing. All of them with the same word written onto them; ‘survival’.
“I kept thinking about what you said. That first time we went out.” She looked at you. “I think you’re a lot like me.”
You wiped at your face, which was now sticky with dried tears.
“I was fucking stupid.” Ellie sighed and set down the sketchbook. “I shouldn’t have fucked that girl, especially when you could hear it—“ She rubbed her hands on her face, her voice cracking. It was solid again the next time she spoke. “But I did it because I was scared. Dina told the truth about how it is with most girls. I wanted it to be different with you.”
“But I’d been such an asshole to you in the beginning, and I didn’t know what to do with that, and I certainly didn’t know what to do with how I felt for you, cause I hadn’t felt it in such a long time and I was so terrified of messing it up that I guess I just thought, fuck it. It’s not going to work out. Let’s just get it over with.”
You had your hands on your thighs, and you were squeezing the fabric of your dress hard.
“But then…” She wrung her fingers. “Then you didn’t reply. And I knew I’d done exactly that. So I tried to go on with my life.” She scoffed. “It was fucking unbearable. I couldn’t focus at work. Any design I made had you in it. I couldn’t stop thinking about you, and how I might’ve hurt you, so I did the stupidest thing and instead of telling you how I felt I just asked if you wanted to hang out. Because I convinced myself that maybe it was all in my head and you didn’t even feel the same way I did.”
She drew in closer. “Look, I won’t lie to you. I can’t promise you I’ll be great for you. I’m not easy. But I do like you. A lot.”
You exhaled. Your eyes landed on your feet, then on her. Another tear trailed down your cheek. “Ellie…”
The look on her face broke your heart. She looked so vulnerable, like she was terrified of what you’d say next. So you just got up and walked over to her, placing your hands on her shoulders. She gazed up at you, keeping her hands to herself. You planted a small kiss on her lips. Then you drew back to look at her.
She was quick to wrap her hands around your waist, pulling you to her, kissing you hungrily. You were about to settle back into the couch when she hoisted you up, guiding your legs to fit around her waist. She stood up and kissed your neck as she carried you over to your room, laying you down gently on the bed.
Then your lips were meeting again, your limbs and torso moving in tune with hers. And there it was again, that sweet nectarine feeling coursing through you. She stopped kissing you just long enough to pull off your jacket while you pushed up her jumper, after which she went back in, ravenous for the feel of your mouth against hers.
Her hand went to your dress, tugging it up, then it was sliding up your thigh and you couldn’t help but let out a pleased groan at her touch. You felt the corners of her mouth move the slightest bit. Her fingers moved to pull at your underwear, dipping inside your folds. It was hard to keep in time with her then, as your body racked through with pleasure, you kept breaking the kiss to let out gasps and moans Ellie seemed desperate to swallow.
“El,” you whispered. She traveled from your cheeks to your jaw, planting pecks along the way, her nose pushing slightly against your skin.
“What is it?” she said, but when you didn’t say anything other than her nickname, she continued the thrusting motion of her fingers, deeper and deeper until she hit a spot which caused you to arch your back and whine. The orgasm built inside you and crashed down your legs, leaving them trembling. You inhaled and exhaled hard. Ellie withdrew her hand and brought her fingers to her lips, licking them. You hid your face, smiling.
She laughed and brought it back so you would look at her. You wrapped your legs around one of hers, so that your thigh was up against her warmth, making her grunt. When you began moving your body up and down, your thigh followed, and she hugged your arms, desperate to feel more of the pressure.
Your moans blended into each other. Ellie came first, and you came right after she started touching your neck and sucking the thin skin there.
Her hands went to your face, cupping it in her palms, her fingers brushing up and down your cheeks so her digits could feel the little parts which were still damp. Your own fingers studied the freckled bridge of her nose, the scar at her brow, the curve of her lips. Her eyes were red, and you didn’t know if it was from the weed or crying or both. Time passed differently. It didn’t matter how much of it you spent.
-
a/n - pls feel free to comment what you think!! I love receiving comments I might not reply to them all bc I don't want to be annoying but I promise I see them and I love them smm
@boobdrug @macaroni676 @appleofmyii @hemmo01 @elsmissingfingers @elliesapple @fatbootymuncher @d1psht @liasxeatt @metrolinha743 @nouvell-vague @salvatoreamoree @bforest
p.s. I love ur usernames...sorry if I missed anyone
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room-surprise · 4 months ago
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what part of SA does kabru seem like he's from? i thought maybe nepal or India but idk
(To clarify for readers I think by SA they mean "South Asia." Also this post is an excerpt/remix of the information in my essay about the real world linguistic and cultural references that exist in Dungeon Meshi. You can read Kabru's section of that essay here. You can also read a tumblr version of Kabru's section here.) Kabru is the name of a mountain on the border between Nepal and India, so I agree with you, and I think he's from somewhere similar to both of those places! I don't believe any location in Dungeon Meshi is an exact copy of a place in the real world (Except Wa being Japan) so there's probably some other cultural elements mixed in there too.
I talk about this in detail in the Kabru section of my essay, in the chapter on Miscellaneous tall-men. I'll give an abridged version here, with some pictures, since this is tumblr, and I love nothing more than talking about Kabru lmao
Utaya (ウタヤ) is the name of the village that Kabru lived in until his mother’s death. It’s located in the southeastern part of the Western Continent, in an area that seems to be made up of arid mountains and cliffs, based on images in the manga, anime, and world guide.
(Utaya circled in red. As you can see it's around a mountain chain.)
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Obviously the terrain information is anime-only, as Kui's map doesn't include this information... HOWEVER, Kui does give us POPULATION maps.
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This is the combined population map my spouse made in 2023 to help us understand where the different races live. How does this help us?
In the real world, geographic barriers like rivers and mountains are usually what create the boundaries between different cultural groups. The person who made the anime map obviously knows this (or Kui told them) and they placed mountains and rivers based on where there are divisions between the races on Kui's map.
There's an ethnic enclave of gnomes and dwarves in the bottom east corner of the Western continent. There is most likely a serious mountain range between that population and the rest of the continent, since the World Guide says the Western Continent is dominated by elves, not dwarves or gnomes.
So, there probably ARE mountains around Utaya, in the manga, even though Kui hasn't explicitly told us so. So it's probably a region like the Himalayas, like Nepal, since those are some of the tallest mountains on earth.
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These red cliffs Kabru is standing around in the first anime opening are likely meant to represent Utaya, since there is no place on the island or in the dungeon that looks like this. It's where Kabru comes from and what happened there is both vitally important to his character, and the Dungeon Meshi story as a whole, so it makes sense to foreshadow its existance in the OP.
Utaya (pronounced “uthaaya”) could be Hindi (उठाया) or Urdu (اٹھایا), but it’s also the name of a Yakut/Sakha village in Siberia (Утайа). So the village's name is either Hindi or Urdu (both Indian languages which are mutually intelligible) or Turkic. I think it's most likely the former.
The appearance of Utaya, especially the red cliffs that the anime has shown us, looks a lot like a remote part of Nepal called the Mustang District.
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Mustang (मुस्ताङ) District straddles the Himalayas and extends northward onto the Tibetan Plateau. The district is one of the remotest areas in Nepal and is second in terms of the sparsity of population.
Geographically, Mustang is a cold, high-altitude steppe that is a part of the Tibetan highlands.
Upper Mustang (the northern part of the district) was once part of the Kingdom of Lo-Manthang, isolated from the rest of the world by some of the tallest peaks on earth. From the 15th to the 17th century, its strategic location granted the Kingdom of Lo-Manthang control over trade between the Himalayas and India.
We know that dungeons only grow large and dangerous if a lot of humans visit them, and dungeons that don’t have a lot of traffic tend to wither away. If Utaya was a trade hub that saw a lot of people and goods moving through it (lots of desire) like Lo-Manthang, it would make sense for a man-made dungeon to grow out of control there.
Being major trade hubs might even be something that Utaya and Merini have in common, since Merini was once the major port of entry to the Eastern Continent from the West. That may be part of why both of them grew such catastrophically dangerous dungeons.
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Now obviously these houses are drawn REALLY roughly and without a lot of detail... But Kui generally doesn't seem to enjoy drawing houses so I'm not surprised. Nepal has both steepled and flat-roofed houses though, and villages that are built on the side of a steep incline aren't uncommon.
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Additional reasoning:
In the Daydream Hour book, there is a comic about various characters presenting sweets from their home regions. Kabru attempts to share a dessert from Utaya that looks like white oblong balls on a plate.
These are probably an Indian sweet called rasgulla (literally "syrup filled ball"). Rasgulla are a dessert popular in the eastern part of South Asia (an area that includes the Himalayas), made from ball-shaped dumplings of chhena dough, cooked in light sugar syrup. Rasgulla are also popular in Nepal, where they are called rasbari.
The Nepal sky caves have a passing resemblance to parts of the Ancient cities that Kui shows us towards the end of the manga, where there are homes that look like they are built directly into cliff walls. Since Utaya had a man-made dungeon beneath it, there was probably an Ancient city located there... Just like these ancient ruins in Nepal.
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The Ancient cities even more closely resemble Phuktal Monastery, a Buddhist monastery located in the Lungnak Valley in the Himalayan region of Ladakh, in Northern India. Phuktal is in a region very similar to Upper Mustang, on the border between North India and Tibet.
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And finally, I think there's story significance to Kabru coming from a place like Nepal.
The way Kui describes dungeons and the villages that grow up around them are similar to real world gold-rush or boom towns. The ability for people to make a lot of money in a hurry, with very little initial investment, attracts poor and desperate people who use the dungeon as a way to lift themselves out of poverty. This transforms the local areas from whatever their normal lifestyle was into a service economy that is completely dependent on the unstable dungeon.
In the real world, a huge amount of Nepal’s economy depends on tourism in the Himalayan mountain range. Nepal is a very poor country, and working as a porter at Mt. Everest, a Nepali can make nearly double the nation's average wage.
The Himalayas are an extremely popular tourist destination, and the amount of people who want to visit and attempt to climb the mountains far outpaces the local ability to support it. This makes me think of the dungeon of Utaya, and the dungeon of Merini, and how people have overcrowded it in their desire to conquer and exploit it for economic gain and glory.
Dungeons as an unsustainable way for locals to make a living, that leads to the destruction of their homes when the dungeon inevitably collapses, is a major plot point in Dungeon Meshi, so I think the parallel is likely intentional. Characters often talk about someone “conquering” the dungeon, and “conquer” is also the terminology commonly used for climbing a mountain.
This phrasing obviously has a hostile, imperialist subtext in the real world, since it’s most commonly used by outsiders talking about proving their strength by climbing a mountain in some exotic, foreign place. I think it has the same subtext in Dungeon Meshi. People want to assert themselves by proving they are stronger than the dungeon.
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endiness · 6 months ago
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okay, i have gone through probably 50+ s2 interviews of hc researching this so far and i have to say that at this point i really don't see how he wasn't deliberately trying to manipulate the fanbase and the media against the writers and the show to get them onto his side. (and also, like, a very specific, extremely toxic section of the fandom at that.) (it's the sexist incel gamerbros. i'm talking about them.)
"I wanted to represent as much of a book-accurate Geralt as possible and a lot of the fans did as well, and so I campaigned really hard to make sure that he was more verbose, he sounded more intellectual, his choice of words was more thought out and that his approach to Cirilla and everyone else wasn’t antagonistic. Because it initially came across as he was just grumpy all the time with everyone and everything and I really wanted to show this three-dimensional character […] It’s gonna be tough to do the stuff which is as brilliant as Sapkowski’s writing, but it’s something I’m always gonna campaign for and it’s hopefully fit into the vision of the show."
there are so many interviews (ie virtually every interview out of 50+ with the exception of maybe, like, 3) where hc says the exact same thing about how he just cares so much about book accuracy, specifically where geralt's characterization is concerned, and that he really started to push for a more book accurate geralt in s2 and wanted him to be more verbose and intelligent and show that he isn't just a one dimensional character who just grunts and says hmm all the time like in s1 — and at no point does he ever take any responsibility for how that was due to his acting choices in the first place because he would cut his lines.
he also just straight up lies about the situation because the writers originally wrote geralt as being more verbose and book accurate in s1 but then changed the way they were writing him due to the acting choices he made. and yet he acts like that was never the case and that geralt was never originally written that way and he pushes this idea that a book accurate geralt went against lauren's vision. even though, once again, that was the original vision and it only changed due to him.
and on the extremely rare occasion (i'm talking, like, maybe 2 con panels here) that he ever takes any kind of responsibility for his role in all of that, he still waffles about and tries to present this image that he wasn't really cutting that many lines and they weren't really that important anyway and it didn't really matter:
"I didn't even cut that much. Just little bits when someone says how they feel, I thought if Geralt says nothing, and maybe the well-known grunts or hmms and sometimes the occasional f-word, people can take from that what they will."
even though that can't be true as confirmed by joey:
"Henry likes to cut his lines, 'cause he's lazy. No, he literally just likes to cut them. He likes to do more up here [frames his face with his hands] and just with face and hmms and grunts. There's a lot of hmms, and so I often have to take a lot of his lines and turn it into a lot of my stuff so that the plot happens."
and even hc himself confirms this and what joey said in a s1 interview:
"All the grunts, I either added or I didn't say anything and just grunted instead. It was often up to the other actors to go, 'I think he's not gonna say anything now.'"
i also have to point out that hc directly links his push for a more book accurate geralt to reading comments on reddit as i think that's very relevant to what section of the fandom exactly that he's pandering to and why he's been so vocal about it while lying about the role he played in everything and what actually happened:
"I’m on all the Reddit forums. I’m reading all the reviews. I’m literally trying to get everyone’s information. Some of it is not useful, and other criticisms are incredibly useful. I take it all in, and I look forward to bringing it even closer and closer to Sapkowski’s writing. I think any of those criticisms, they often lie in things like I was saying—we don’t have the advantage of a long involved conversation or dialogue with Geralt, so they are criticisms which I think I was prepared for. So for me, it’s about seeing that, understanding it, and working out how I can do my job better within the framework provided, [how to] appease and make those people feel comfortable that I do actually understand this character—and love this character just as much as they do."
"As a source for information, it's really helpful for me to see what everyone's saying, what everyone's thinking, and to see how much my thinking falls in line with whichever side of that spectrum it is and whether I'm doing the wrong thing, for example, by campaigning hard for the book Geralt to exist or whether I'm doing the right thing."
and just another important thing to point out imo: virtually the only times hc ever takes any responsibility in any capacity whatsoever for his own role in the show not adhering to the books (which even then he barely does and it's still always with a lot of excuses), it's only ever at con panels — which are far less likely to get picked up by news outlets and seen by a broader audience — and not in formal interview settings. (except for, i think, one interview he gave early on when s2 first went on hiatus. but even then, it still has the same problems that the con panels have where he comes up with a lot of excuses that don't match what happened.)
then there's an interview hc gave where he went on about how he added some book dialogue into a scene and he made it out to be like it was some kind of rebellion against the writers and he didn't consult them as he was just going to do what he wanted, consequences be damned:
"I did not feel like having long discussion about whether I could add this bit somewhere. So I just did it, said the words in front of the camera, and was ready to face the consequences."
and meanwhile what actually happened was that lauren eventually let hc have free reign and rewrite a scene that he was unhappy with. which, y'know. kinda fucking weird to present what happened in the way he did.
and then there's him pushing this narrative that the female characters — namely yennefer and ciri — were given more depth and focus than geralt and the male characters as if that came at their expense and all of which is somehow due to lauren's women-centric vision of the show as if that's somehow opposed to how the books themselves are:
"On season two, I wanted to bring as much of 'Book' Geralt into the show that Lauren's vision and that the plot would allow. That's a tricky thing to do, because the plot, as Lauren has said, is very centred around bringing women into the centre of The Witcher."
"In Season 1, there wasn't really much of an opportunity for expansive dialogue which Geralt is known for — in the books, he's often known to monologue — because we had two original origin stories which were the center point of the show."
"Lauren’s vision was more of an ensemble piece than the first Witcher books. It’s driven a lot more by the characters of Yennefer and Cirilla."
"I wanted to make sure we really explored as much as showrunner's vision could allow. She has her own plan, so I’ve got to toe that line between book Geralt and Lauren’s vision."
"I wanted to try and bring as much of the book’s Geralt into Season 2 as possible, and as much as the vision, the plot and storylines would allow. The toughest part for me was finding that balance between the showrunners’ vision and my love for the books, and trying to bring that Geralt to the showrunners’ vision."
"It’s important for me to have the character be three-dimensional and it’s tricky to do, as I was saying earlier, because there’s a certain vision and there’s a certain set, storyline and plot. And so, it was about me trying to find Geralt’s place within that."
"There’s only so much space to provide the same character from the books within the showrunner’s vision. But, I did my best to provide a bit more of a three-dimensional character with a bit more emotionality."
"It's important to me that the men in the story are three dimensional as well."
like, first off — and not to continually reiterate this but — that's not true. in s1, geralt was originally written as being just as verbose and intellectual as he was in the books and that only changed due to hc cutting his lines and we know that joey often had to take his lines, too. so there was, in fact, always plenty of time for geralt to be book accurate and for yennefer and ciri to have their own focus. these things were never mutually exclusive and it's definitely some kinda take to imply otherwise.
secondly, while it is true that geralt is the main character of the short stories, ciri is the main character of the main series starting from blood of elves, the book that s2 adapted. and despite claims otherwise, her pov has always had the most focus — yes, even more than geralt (sans baptism of fire, obvs.) and it's not like ciri is the only female pov, either, or that there aren't other important female characters that make up the series. there's yennefer, triss, milva, philippa, fringilla, nimue, condwiramurs, kenna — and that's just off the top of my head. there are plenty more where that came from. women and their stories have always played a central role in the books. nothing about that goes against them or is unique to lauren's vision.
and just with boe in particular, like. triss's pov is either focused on more than geralt's or at least about as much as his depending on how you want to break things down. and with dandelion following very close behind them, too! like, ciri may be the main character of the main series and geralt may be the main character of the short stories and their povs are the most focused on overall, but the books are still very much an ensemble piece made up of a collage of many, many povs to paint a full picture of the universe. and, yeah, the women make up a huge part of that. so the show focusing on ciri and yennefer and the women — and, yes, the men as well because it does actually do that! — is um, still book accurate. so y'know, why the fuck is he presenting this idea that's somehow not the case.
in general, hc emphasizes in a lot of interviews how much he fought for "male characters to be three dimensional." which yeah, given the context of everything else, is some suspicious kinda phrasing because it gives this undertone that the show wasn't writing three dimensional male characters in the first place as opposed to the women and that it's only due to his efforts that anything changed.
also, i have to highlight this quote of him talking about the three dimensionality of men because ~curious that he omits women from the list of people real menTM can be loving and caring toward:
"I believe that real men are very sensitive. They are very capable of doing things which can be violent, if possible, or necessary. But at the same time, they are incredibly capable of love and caring amongst men and towards children and family and all sorts."
and then there's the way hc talks about changing things which comes across as so suspicious, too, imo. especially when there is every other cast member to compare him to. because the way the rest of the cast has talked about this is that they all very consistently say that the whole process is very collaborative and that lauren is very much willing to hear them out about their thoughts and concerns and that it really feels like a team effort and that everyone is working together. and meanwhile the vibes that hc gives off is either "me vs the world (ie the writers)" or "but there's nothing that i can really do to change anything and it's all on the writers~" either way, his attitude very much comes off like all bad decisions are the writers' fault but meanwhile any good decision was due to him and him alone (or maybe the rest of the cast, but definitely not the writers.) like, weird af to play it off that way especially since every other cast member didn't seem to have any problems and they all gave credit where credit was due ie to lauren and the writers.
in conclusion, it'd be one thing if hc had just taken the l and admitted that he is the one who fucked up geralt's characterization in s1 and so he sought to rectify that in s2. but yeah, he doesn't really do that. instead he lies over, like, 50 times to create this narrative of him pushing for book accuracy as if that's somehow in opposition to lauren and the writers and as if they didn't originally write geralt book accurately in the first place and as if he played no role in the lack of book accuracy at all. and then that there's also him pushing this subtle (or not so subtle) narrative about how the women were taking a more central role as opposed to the men and that's somehow unlike the books and something purely due to lauren's vision, too? even though women have always played a central role in the books to the point where ciri is the main character of the main series? and that he's directly linked this narrative he's pushing to reading comments on reddit? (and that he also has a history, since s1, of trying to cater to game stans?) yeah, i just don't see how this doesn't add up to him trying to manipulate the media and audience — especially the worst parts of the fanbase — against the writers and the show and onto his side.
(also just one last thing i'd like to note as i find it super weird that when hc was asked about giving freya any advice, he immediately shut down the notion that he would ever do anything like that and he would never offer her any unsolicited advice and he would only ever give her any if she came to him first. like, there are literally s1 and s2 interviews where freya talks about hc giving her advice. i mean, maybe she did come to him in the first place, idk. but the immediacy in which he shut down the idea that he would ever do anything like that as if offering someone younger than you advice and being a mentor to them is wrong… weird. sus, even. like, why are you scrambling to cover your ass for something that's not even bad and, also, why are you lying about it by omission in the very least.)
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awrkive · 4 months ago
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NEIGHBOR BLUNDER, pt. 2 — JJK (m.)
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in hindsight, you should have seen it coming. had always known your luck – or lack of it, thereof – and the universe's meticulous plan of your downfall made it easy for you to get tangled up in a series of unfortunate events, which presents itself as the neighbor that lives across from you, jeon jungkook.
PAIRING jungkook x (fem) reader
GENRE r18+ (fluff, angst, smut) MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!
CHAPTER WORD COUNT 22.5k
CHAPTER WARNINGS/MISC neighbor!jk, bsf!jimin, accountant!oc software engineer!jk, jk and jimin are chaebols lol, minjoon boyfriends <<<<3, mature language, lots of screaming into your pillow moments FLUFFY FLUFF FLUFFFFFFFFFFFFF, lovely hot nerdy jk ): (i think i speak for all women when i say that nerdy jungkook is the best jungkook say I IF U AGREE),[explicit sexual content: masturbation (f)], has the budding romance finally hit the second towers? read more to find out
NOTES hey everyone thank you so much for the overwhelming support on this silly little fic. i hope you guys enjoy this update and let me know your thoughts in the replies/reblog section and in my inbox, wherever you prefer hehe <3
NB!JK VISUALS | TAGLIST OPEN
READ ON WATTPAD | AO3
PART ONE | TWO | THREE
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You usually finish prepping for the office at around 7:40 am, just enough time left to walk to the station and catch your bus at exactly 8 am.
As of now, it's 7 but the clock's longer hand has moved past the 40-minute mark, and you are still in your living room, supposedly all done and ready to go – except that you're stuck on the floor looking at your laptop perched on your coffee table, staring at it blankly, the HR email looking right back at you; almost daunting.
Subject: Invitation to Ceremony: Announcement of Interim CTO Dear Blue Nexus Inc. employee, We hope this email finds you well. We would like to inform you that a ceremony has been scheduled on July 29, 2028, 10:00 am at the AVR Hall 5, 12th floor. The purpose of this event is to announce the appointment of our interim Chief Technology Officer (CTO), Mr. Jeon Jungkook. As you may be aware, our previous CTO, Mr. Shin Juman, is currently on medical leave recovering from a stroke. While he is recuperating and undergoing treatment, it has become necessary for us to appoint an interim CTO for an indefinite period of time to ensure the continuity and effectiveness of our operations. Your presence at this meeting is highly valued as we introduce the new leadership to the team and outline our strategic direction moving forward. Light refreshments will be served. Thank you for your attention to this matter. We look forward to seeing you at the ceremony. Best regards, HR Department
You've been reading it over and over again you're sure you can recite it with ease if prompted. It's in the hopes that the name Jeon Jungkook will suddenly disappear somewhere in the email – that maybe you missed some detail, and it doesn't actually mention his name at all. You read the email repeatedly wishing that it is just a glitch in the system and what you found out about yesterday are all just a part of your extreme delusion. Maybe it's one of those nights with Jimin at his apartment where you would indulge in a little bit of guilty pressure – pots, to be exact – and just let it take you to a whole new world.
But you and Jimin didn't go home together last night, and you definitely did not smoke pot. He went straight to the airport and you straight home with nothing but mixed feelings inside, and you were more than thankful that Jimin was in a bout of panic himself about not getting there on time that he didn't notice you squirming in his passenger seat.
There is a vague memory in your head with him telling you he was going to come with Namjoon, but you can't be for sure. Everything that transpired that night is all reduced down to the very moment in the comfort room when you realized the glaring information about Jungkook being three eggs in your basket: first, he's Jimin's cousin. Second, he's an executive in your company – a CTO, to be exact – and while you aren't exactly working under his department and they are all the way up ten floors above you, he's still technically your boss according to the hierarchy. The son of the CEO of the very company you are working at. Not only is he the CTO, but third he's also your neighbor. Someone you've met weeks ago whom you may have developed a growing relationship with that will now possibly be bleak in a matter of hours or days depending on if you are going to tell him or if he finds out.
That is the thing that you're currently debating with yourself about as you let your eyes glide over the unsuspecting email from HR for the nth time.
7:50 am – the clock on your screen reads.
You think about the dock pay that you're gonna get if you come to work late. At this point, you can run to the station and still catch your bus, but you have to decide in a minute for that to be possible.
Groaning, you feel defeated as you shut your laptop close and stand up from the floorboards, your eyes going over to the door across from you which earns yourself a wince.
I'm gonna get a dock pay and it will all be Jungkook's fault. That jerk.
Okay – obviously, he's far from a jerk and he has nothing to do with any of this. You just like blaming anybody.
You sigh, grabbing your bag, finally making up your mind to just go and see for yourself what today has to offer you. A little optimism, if you will. But if you manage to bump into Jungkook at that company you aren't sure if you're not going to do something embarrassing because one thing about you, you do not know how to face certain challenges in life like a matured individual – you always have to be a little overboard and overdramatic with it.
You were heading towards the door when you suddenly remember your ID.
Your ID. Funny.
As you pick it up off the coffee table, you think about how you don't really wear it on the way to work and on your way home. You don't like the feeling of the lanyard wrapping around the skin of your nape, so you've always just worn it when you're in the office where it is mandatory. Otherwise, you make sure to take it off.
Suddenly, you think about a scenario where you're the kind of employee to wear their ID all the time, and those nights where you'd go to Midday straight from work to have dinner with Jungkook would've turned out differently because then if you were to have worn your ID during one of those meetings, he would've figured out that you're working at the same company. And maybe... the conversation about his relation to Jimin would've came up.
And maybe, you won't feel so... complicated about the whole thing.
How – in the two weeks that you've spent with him – do you know too much yet so little about him? How did you ever not ask each other where you work and how did this all come to you like a landslide and now you have no way out?
God's sake, you know about his dog, and you've exchanged numbers... and yet...
Although, granted, maybe you should've asked for each other's socials? Does he have Instagram? Twitter? Maybe if you had exchanged those sooner, you would've gotten to know him more and made the connections you only recently found out.
You want so badly to reach out to Jimin to talk to him about all of this. But he hasn't really contacted you since he sent off Namjoon to the airport. Maybe he really did leave with him, and it isn't just your imagination when he said something about going there last night when you sneaked out of the party.
But deep inside... you do not really want to talk to him about any of this, at all.
It is, to simply put, awkward.
You feel ashamed for gushing about your neighbor that is apparently the same person as his cousin. Feel embarrassed about how you ogled over him to Jimin when in fact, they're related. You don't know about other people, but you know the unspoken rule about not dating your friends' relatives? Not like you're dating Jungkook, but you have a crush on him for fuck's sake. The strings do not even stop at their blood relation because it extends to your workplace as well.
You know Jimin well enough to feel confident about not getting judged by him if you were to tell him about it, and if he actually does, he will directly say it to your face as far as you're concerned. But...
It's just all too awkward to tell anyone about. You're in too deep in the sea of embarrassment and shame you cannot think of ways to get out of it.
Your head is starting to hurt, and you know it's the sign to stop thinking. So, you shut up all the voices in your head and walk towards the door ready to go out, telling yourself that whatever happened, you're going to handle everything cooly like the grown woman you are.
Stepping outside the threshold of your apartment, you're just about to turn around to lock the door on your way out when suddenly, the door across yours opens and there welcomes you the man starring in your list of problems for the day: Jeon Jungkook, your neighbor Unit 446.
"Oh, hi. Good morning—"
You turn on your heel so quickly and open the door to your apartment so fast it's almost at the speed of light, entering your apartment once again and slamming the door closed, pressing your back on it as your eyes widen; heart beating at a staccato of thug, thug, thug as you take a moment to hold your breath.
What the fuck.
How in the hell is this the first time you see each other getting ready to work? It couldn't have happened in the first week you knew him or hell, the first day?! Why must you have bumped into him like that the moment you finally knew about who he is? Everything is getting way too ridiculous. It's like the universe is telling you once again that you'll always be her middle child: unfavorable by all ends.
"Shit." You hiss, biting your lip quite harshly as you think about how you must've looked like a goddamn fool turning on him like that for no reason. Jungkook must've been weirded the hell out – and rightfully so.
You face-palm. Damn, you were just telling yourself you're gonna handle everything like a grown, matured woman.
You unconsciously walk on your tippy toes on the way to the small window on the side of the door that lets you oversee outside your door, peeking from there like a creep as you watch Jungkook, still on his porch – with his grey coat over his arm – looking down on his phone and doing something with it.
That something is apparently sending you a text.
Jungkook (Unit 446) [7:52am]: why did u seem like u just saw a ghost?
The message read when you open your phone at the bell of notification. You haven't even read all of it yet when another one comes in.
Jungkook (Unit 446) [7:52am]: am I that appalling in the mornings? Haha 🥴
On any occasion, you would've laughed and go along with the joke, but you do not know what to say to him.
You stand there doing nothing, just staring at his two consecutive messages, poorly left on read. You purse your lips as you peek from the small window again, getting a glimpse of Jungkook standing still on his porch, eyes glued to his phone. He waits for awhile, and then you see him shaking his head with a hint of... smile on his face?
And then your phone dings once again.
Jungkook (Unit 446) [7:53am]: good morning by the way. Get safely to work
You stare at it so hard that the next second you look at the window, he isn't there anymore.
Letting out a heavy breath, you knock your head on the door, thinking about how you missed your 8 am bus and you have to wait for 30 minutes for another one to come and most especially, how you're going to get a dock pay for being late.
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It's almost as if Jungkook is running for higher office the way his face is plastered all over the LED screens inside the building, showing the announcement of his ceremony. It's taunting almost, the way it was the first thing you see when you swiped your ID for entry.
Although, you do find it funny that it's the same man you just saw in front of you when you stepped outside of your place earlier this morning.
"Sol," you call your co-worker and also your friend, sliding your swivel chair closer to her desk. "Do we really have to go to the ceremony?" You ask, seeing that everybody in the office is already setting aside the stuff on their desks to head out to the 12th floor where the announcement ceremony will be held.
Sol fixes the post-it note on her computer first before turning to you, "Of course we do."
You pout at that.
"Is Ms. Jung really gonna be mad if we don't attend?"
"You know how she has this obsession of making our department look good, so I'm assuming yes." She answers, and you slump in your seat knowing damn well she's right to think that. Sol sees your seemingly grumpy disposition and asks, "Why? You don't wanna go?"
If only she knew.
You shake your head to her question.
"I just think it's gonna be boring," you shrug, the lie rolling on your tongue seamlessly.
"Eh, at least it's less work for today. Those things run for two hours and there's free lunch so that's that."
Events like these are supposed to be advantageous for you because again, Sol is right and those things do run for about two hours meaning less workload. Also, free lunch. Who doesn't like free stuff? But then again, Jungkook is going to be there and with your luck, you're starting to think that you're going to see more of him from now on. That is just how the world works against you.
"You're right." You say, frowning becoming more and more apparent, you're sure.
Sol chuckles at you and stands up herself, fixing her dress as you follow her out of the office.
Before you could completely go out though, you stop her on her tracks.
"Hey, do you think you have a face mask I can borrow?" You say, looking hopefully at her. Sol raises her brows, obviously confused at your strange request. Clearing your throat, you pretend to cough a little in your fisted hand. "I'm feeling a little under the weather today, but I drank my meds this morning. Forgot the mask." You reason with her, adding more lies to the conversation.
"Oh, I see. Okay, I think I have it." Sol perks up at the realization and you both enter your office once again, with your co-worker digging through her desk's drawer for the mask you were asking her for.
She hands it to you as soon as she finds it and you're quick to wear it around your mouth, silently rejoicing in your head at the brilliant last-minute plan you came up with in your head in order to avoid anything with Jungkook later. Not that you expect him to do something if he, indeed, sees you – you doubt he even will, given that the hall is huge, and you are planning to sit all the way back – but the mask is just a precautionary measure so there are less chances of him recognizing you or anything crazy like that.
Together, Sol and you ride the elevator down to the 12th floor and unsurprisingly, a lot of the company's employees are already there, finding their seats, chitchats heard across the hall.
"Sol, __!" Joonhwi, one of your co-junior accountants and also a friend, calls out to you both, separating himself from the other accountants and heading to your direction. "You're sick?" He asks as soon as he sees your face covered with the mask.
"A little." You reply.
Joonhwi nods his head and then say, "I thought you girls were planning to ditch the ceremony."
"I'll do anything to not see your face but then again we work together so I have no choice." Sol snarkily remarks.
"Sol, can you please refrain from professing your love to me with all these people around?" Joonhwi retorts back, smarmy and teasing, ever the expert on how to get on Sol's nerves.
"__, can you get this khia away from me?"
You laugh at both of their exchange, shaking your head at their silly antics. You don't know if Sol is just... emotionally constipated, but damn, she sure is clueless as hell about Joonhwi's feelings. It seems like everybody from the accounting department knows except for her.
Shaking your head, you go straight to the seats available with Joonhwi and Sol sitting on opposite sides of you.
"Anyway, I heard they're appointing Mr. Jeon's son." Joonhwi suddenly say.
Now that makes you squirm.
"Really?" You utter, just to give them a reaction.
Sol looks at you weird. "I thought everybody knew that?"
"Well, there are lots of Jeons in Korea..." you tell her, earning a laugh from Joonhwi which makes Sol frown.
"A man is not allowed to laugh in my vicinity, Joonhwi, shut up," she says rolling her eyes. Her tone shifts when she speaks to you though, suddenly sounding more gossip-y as she shows you a picture on her phone. "Look at the material, though,"
You look at the photo of a man who very much has the same and exact coloring of the one and only Jeon Jungkook you know and you have to swallow the lump in your throat.
"I mean, I've always thought Mr. Jeon was a DILF but his son is – damn." She adds, zooming in on Jungkook's professional head shot.
You and Joonhwi both give her the stinky eye.
"Have some class." you tell her, earning a laugh from both of them.
"For the record, you agreed to that before." Sol points out, referring to that dinner you three had at a barbecue house awhile ago. For the record, though, you were both drunk and Joonhwi had to haul Sol's ass back to her place and call Jimin to get you to yours.
"I refuse to acknowledge anything I've ever said when I was drunk."
"Okay but is anybody getting the urge to get transferred to the IT department expeditiously?" Sol jokes, obviously swooning over Jungkook.
Joonhwi snorts. "The CTO doesn't even go there."
"Killjoy much?" Sol frowns at him. "He'd visit, though. Imagine the eye candy."
You eye her in a teasing manner, "You have enough candy on your plate, Sol." And then you subtly look over Joonhwi.
Joonhwi himself doesn't seem to expect the insinuation, but nonetheless you know that he got the message of you implying he's good-looking and if Sol is looking for that, he's just there. That is why he suddenly loses his smirk and rests his back on the seat, crossing his arms as he retires himself from the conversation, obviously dodging your teasing.
Psh. Emotionally constipated co-worker number two.
"What the hell does that mean?" Sol asks, but she can't get an answer as the ceremony begins.
"Good morning, everyone. Today marks a significant moment as we gather to appoint our interim Chief Technology Officer," The host starts the introduction, "We are here to acknowledge the pivotal role of the CTO in our company's journey to ensure continuity in our innovation efforts. It is with great pleasure that I introduce Mr. Jeon Jungkook, our interim CTO, who has been selected to step into the position."
And there is him, in his grey suit that you've seen him in earlier. He's wearing his glasses as well, the one that has the thinner frame. You notice he switches between two kinds; he wears the thick-framed one off work and the thin-framed one during work, like right now. 
Jungkook smiles at the applause that reverberates all over the hall. There are LED screens that hang on both sides of the room and you can see his face clearly there. Sol gushes over how good he looks.
"Jesus, wow..." Sol whispers to herself, and you're sure she did not mean for you to hear that, so you try not to acknowledge it because deep inside, you agree with her. That's exactly your reaction when you saw him for the first time in the stairs of your apartment complex – and he didn't even clean up in his suit that time.
Jungkook stands on the podium with an easy-going smile on his face, his aura screaming confidence. He looks so sure of himself, like he's born to actually do this.
"Thank you, Mr. Park. Good day to all. I am deeply honored and humbled to accept the role of Chief Technology Officer at Blue Nexus Incorporation. As we navigate this interim period, my commitment is to uphold..."
You watch as he starts his speech, noting how well he speaks. You aren't a stranger to how people have different personalities when they are in and off work, but it's almost disorienting to see Jungkook going all professional, his voice soft but edgy at the same time, just enough for you and everyone to recognize a bit of authority in there.
He looks over the crowd, and for a brief second, you feel as if his eyes glossed over you far longer than he had other parts in the room.
But that thought dies down as quickly when he immediately goes back to speaking, and you're sure you just imagined it.
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You're in the middle of your night routine when your phone suddenly dings.
Jungkook (Unit 446) [10:44pm]: just remembered we never really got around to that boxing machine, did we
Right. Today is Friday and you are supposed to go that boxing machine to determine if he's gonna supply your daily boba or if you're coming over to his place so he can cook you both a meal.
But that deal was made days ago when you still were clueless about his identity, and admittedly, you'd say that right now, you're doing anything to avoid him.
Scrolling through your message thread and seeing Jungkook's texts since that morning being left on read makes you feel bad. You know it isn't fair. It isn't nice to just suddenly go leave people dry like that, especially Jungkook who has been so strangely non-confronting about your sudden weird behavior.
It takes you a few minutes to give him a reply due to you erasing and retyping your message repeatedly.
You [10:47pm]: sorry ive been busy the whole day with work ):
Was what you lamely came up with. You couldn't have done better than that, to be honest with yourself.
Jungkook (Unit 446) [10:47pm]: I see Jungkook (Unit 446) [10:48pm]: so raincheck tonight?
You [10:48]: sorryyyy for cancellig im just feeling a little under the weather
Jungkook (Unit 446) [10:49pm]: ohhhh ok ok sorry for texting late
You [10:50pm]: asbdbsfjshf its fine!!!!!!!!
Maybe you didn't think it through, but you find yourself typing the next message and hitting send way too quickly.
You [10:51pm]: maybe tomorrow?
You're thinking about taking it back, but Jungkook has already replied.
Jungkook (Unit 446) [10:51pm]: ok. I'll see you tomorrow 😊
Pursing your lips, you wonder what he's doing tonight.
Is he working? Maybe some take-home paperworks? What do CTOs even do? He must be really busy... though you think it has to be otherwise since he had the time to text you.
You stand up from the chair of your vanity table, patting your hair one last time and jumping to your bed, ready to overthink some more then sleep when an idea suddenly pops up into your head the moment your eyes lay on your phone.
Making yourself comfortable on your mattress, you pick up the phone from your night stand and unlock it, your fingers making quick work of opening the Instagram app and typing jeonjungkook on the search bar.
The results show you a few accounts that resemble the username you looked up, but as you check each one, none of them seems to belong to the man you're looking for. So, you try a few varieties: jungkook, jungkookjeon, jeon... JK?... but then you're sure you've milked out the last of your brain juice trying to come up with a possible username for him but to no avail.
Jimin must be following him, you think to yourself. Since Jimin is a snob on his verified and public account and isn't following anybody there, you go straight to his private account to try and find a Jungkook in his following but again – you guessed it, failed search.
"Does he not have an IG?" you ask yourself, feeling quite exhilarated.
You think about Twitter, but remembering Jungkook's face makes you share your head in disagreement with yourself. There is no way he has Twitter. That guy looks terminally offline and doesn't have the face of someone who likes tweeting in his leisure time.
You'd say it was curiosity rather than desperation when you decided to install Facebook and hoped to see some of him there. You did have little hopes though, as you started typing his name, thinking there was no way you'd see him on the app because, who even uses Facebook nowadays except moms and dads and grandparents?
But then as you jokingly type his name and enter it on the search bar, a few tagged pictures of him show up.
The first one is posted by a Jeon Junghyun, his brother, and the picture is from 2017. Said picture is of Jungkook at the airport sitting on his luggage, and the caption reads as: good luck in college brother.
You stare at the picture, noting how young he looked in it and suddenly feel disoriented when you see his arms with no ink around them. They're so bare, and he definitely looked more lean, not like the muscly guy you know him as now. He was starting college here, so he must've been only 19 in the photo... meaning he got his tattoos in the States while he was in college or maybe even later than that?
You click on Jungkook's page, the one that his brother tagged in the photo, but all you see is the default Facebook profile picture and a locked account.
Feeling disappointed at that, you go back to his brother's page and check it out, throwing all your shame away as you look through his photos.
He must've limited his audience since the public posts are all outdated, but there are a few pictures in which Jungkook is in them, as well as other recurring people who seem to be their parents.
There's a recent family picture of them in the Eiffel Tower – uploaded in 2022 – all four of them.
As you see Mr. Jeon, the CEO of your company, with his family, it's hard not to feel... whiplashed, for the lack of better term. From the looks of it, they seem to be... close? For the record, Jimin does not have any casual pictures of him with his parents, and as far as you know, they never went out on trips together – just galas and all that socialite events. You know they are only mere pictures, not solid enough to assume what Jungkook's relationship is with his family, but you're starting to think maybe it's a good one.
That'll honestly be surprising, given that every wealthy family you know has dysfunctional relationships. Nevertheless, it will be quite... adorable if what you think is true.
"Oh my god," you say, disbelieving, as you recognize Jimin in one of Junghyun's public photos while scrolling through more.
It's an event of some sort, and how can you not spot Jimin when he looks conspicuous in his orange hair? You remember this being in your sophomore year in college, and how much Jimin actually hates that hair and wants to burn down every picture that reminds him of it.
You snort as you zoom in on Jimin, taking a screenshot of the photo, mindlessly going to your messaging app; ready to send him the photo to poke lighthearted fun, but then you realize—
"Oh, I can't do that."
Jimin will ask you where you got the photo from, and you'll have to tell him that you were cyber stalking his cousin. Then, he'll ask why you were stalking his cousin, and he will find out the very thing you don't want him to find out.
That makes you frown, quick to delete the message you were just about to send and put your phone back to your nightstand.
Well, that ruins fun.
You wish you can tell Jimin or anyone for the matter, but you currently don't feel comfortable about doing that.
Sighing, you look up at your ceiling, then forcefully close your eyes to avoid more thoughts coming into your head.
You start counting sheep until you fall asleep.
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There had been a lot of times where you felt like shit about yourself. They happen way too many times that at this point, you'd lost count. It wired you to think that there must be something wrong when a day goes all too well.
But there is no beating the feeling of self-antagonism when you ditch somebody – even if it's for a valid reason.
Sure, you've ditched Jimin a couple of times, and he always makes sure to rub it on your face as much as he can until you pout at him and explain to him that there are just some days you do not feel like going out. Jimin, as your best friend, understands that about you, of course.
A lot of times, though, it's the dates you tend to ditch the most. Three dates – you recall – is the number of times you'd skipped out of, just because you had a panic attack thirty minutes before the meeting that one time and two times for the plain, simple fact that you had a realization that you did not really like the guy you were planning to see.
Shin Taemu, the guy from the IT department asked you out last month for a second date and you texted him a last-minute, half-assed lame excuse about having gotten period cramps. Up to this day, you're still wary about using the IT department's copy room because his texts, since then, have been left unanswered. You saw him awhile ago at the cafeteria, though, and he seemed to be treating you non-differently even after you ghosted him suddenly. 
Recently, you're doing the same thing again to Jungkook.
It isn't dating, of course – just the whole ditching thing.
You feel terrible for canceling on him again on Saturday when you just told him Friday night that you would go to that boxing machine. He had texted you a simple "we still on?" with a smiley emoji that gave you the creeps (because that smiley emoji does not ever mean the person is smiling behind it – knowing Jungkook though, it's probably not the case, and you're just overthinking it). You've left that text to rot until Sunday morning, and only picked it up later during the night, telling him you were "sorry I just saw this now! I was swamped with work stuff" even though you've never brought paperworks at home in your whole career and you were just binging The X-Files, bashing those two idiotic emotionally constipated FBI agents when you are quite one, yourself.
Sometimes, you fear you're no better than a man. Jimin will willingly knock your head on a door to get you to your senses and tell you all the things about why you should never compare yourself to them – but there are times like these when your shortcomings – specifically your lack of proficiency in communication – mirror that of a man's, and you hate every single second of it.
Until then, you dreaded for Monday to come.
But it's ultimately inevitable 
And when you wake up from your sleep, it's Monday, and you have to go to work whether you like it or not.
And oh, to add, Jungkook hasn't replied to your message. Which – okay – ouch. But you're not supposed to be hurt by it; if anything, you kind of deserve it after ditching him so many times. He isn't an idiot, and you're sure he knows you lied... you're just thankful that he's not saying anything if he does know, indeed.
You have thought things over in the shower this morning, though.
If Jungkook is three eggs in your basket, why will it matter? So, what's the big deal if he is Jimin's cousin and that he works at the same company and lives in the same apartment complex?
You finally admit that those things matter to you initially because... you have a crush on him. If you didn't, you'll give fuck-all if he's related to your best friend. You won't care at all if he's your boss because you don't have to worry about fantasizing about him.
But the thing is, you do have some sort of romantic feelings for him, and that is why those things moved you in a way that makes you feel and act a little weird around him.
And now there's this feeling of guilt that has overtaken your entire system. Because if you just see Jungkook platonically, these things won't happen. And you hate it, because he's genuinely a good friend. Someone who may want a friend in you too, but you are ruining it all because you have trivial feelings for him.
Absolutely ridiculous.
But now that those realizations have become clear in your head, you've made up your mind by thinking that those eggs don't matter.
It doesn't matter that he's Jimin's cousin, doesn't matter that he's an executive. You are his friend, and it's was okay to have friends that are your other friend's relative and friends who are your boss.
Of course, it's still awkward to think about him catching you in your home clothes but on a more serious note, your crush will never see the light of the day and even if it does, there's no way Jungkook will accept it because guys like him never settle with people like you. And you don't even mean that in a self-deprecating way, not at all! You are just fully aware of the practical world you live in and know that the vast disparity of your economic status will never work, especially with the kind of family he was born into.
With that said, you are ready for things to be back the way they were. No more pussyfooting in the office in fear that you'll bump into him, no more canceling on his innocent invitations to dinner, no more pining over him secretly and putting malice over everything that he does because you're going to be a renewed person now.
You're ready to take on the big shoes and be matured enough to address his questions if ever he has one.
So, you enter the elevator of Blue Nexus Inc. with a sort of spirit that you're sure will be hard to take down, creating pictures in your head that depict a smooth-sailing conversation with Jungkook where you're ideally going to be cool in it and not at all panic-y.
It's alright. Nothing is going to change—
Your thoughts are disrupted when somebody enters the elevator and the people in it suddenly start bowing their heads, a series of greetings reverberating in the confined space.
Fuck.
"Good morning, Mr. Jeon."
"Greetings, Mr. Jeon."
"Mr. Jeon."
Your eyes widen when you see Jungkook walking in with his black suit and sleek black hair, his eyeglasses sitting on his nose.
Okay, so nevermind the illusion that you're going to be cool now – you're absolutely panicking in your position!
Thank fucking god you're at the back with two persons in front of you, hoping they are enough to at least cover your frame as Jungkook stands in front after greeting back the employees inside.
Oh my god. Fuck me.
You tilt your head to the side with a wince on your face, sneakily raising your arm over your head to take your hairclip off so your hair fans your face. It is a poor attempt at covering yourself lest Jungkook suddenly turns around and recognizes you as a result.
But in that moment, you must look stupid as hell that the guy beside you looks at you weird.
You stand upright, giving him a tight-lipped smile. He just snubs you.
That makes you roll your eyes.
You go back to staring at Jungkook's back agonizing the thought that you really aren't ready at all to confront him. You thought about it all morning, but the moment he got here, all those ideations of you being cool around him from thereon are suddenly thrown out the building.
A few seconds after, somebody drops off at the 13th floor, and it starts to make you feel nervous.
What if more people start going out and then you'll be left alone with Jungkook? You intended to go to the 16th floor where your office is... Jungkook is – wait, where is his floor? You actually have no idea. But you are certain it's floors above you. Oh god! How can you possibly move past him without him recognizing you? Shit. You didn't think about that.
Now, you're starting to lose your bottle, your head not able to form ideas to get through him. The elevator is small! And people are starting to head out...
You look at the position indicator of the elevator, telling you that you're going way up to the 15th floor. A few seconds after and it dings, the elevator door opening. The guy in front of you heads way out, and you can see Jungkook still on his spot.
You find yourself not being able to move, completely stoned in your position.
You sure as hell aren't going out unless he does first! That's your solution. If he's located at the topmost floor, you're going to wait until then. You're just going to ride the elevator down again.
But what you don't see coming is Jungkook suddenly moving to head outside the elevator.
Looking at the indicator once again, you confirm if he really is going to the 15th floor.
The door already closed by the time Jungkook is finally out, which eases your nerves. You're way too relieved to forget thinking about why he's in the 15th floor.
You stop at the 16th with a smile on your face, feeling like you just got away with murder. You've never done it – get away with murder – but that's exactly how you feel.
On your way to the office, your phone vibrates from the pocket of your trousers.
Jungkook (Unit 446) [8:56am]: Correct me if I'm wrong but I think I just saw you at the elevator today
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You thought of ways to dodge his bullet, thought about denying his claim and telling him that he must've seen somebody else because you work all the way across town and him seeing you would've been impossible.
But you know the attempts will be futile.
If anything, though, you take it as a sign to finally make things right.
Avoiding Jungkook will never be efficient. In order to be successful in that regard, you'll have to hand in your resignation or move out of your apartment completely and you can't do that.
Besides, for what it's worth, you kind of miss hanging out with him and if you were to continue hiding from him, you will have to say goodbye to having him around at all.
The moment you got off work today, you think of plans to talk to him and maybe, just maybe, invite him for dinner – to, hopefully, make up for all the times you've bailed on him.
With a tail tucked between your legs, you stand apprehensively in front of the door of his unit, still unsure about your plans but doing it nonetheless. There's no going back now.
You ring the doorbell, taking your hand back quickly as if you just got electrocuted by it.
Please don't answer. Please don't be home. Please don't answer—
And there he goes, in his plain white shirt and grey sweats, hair wet from his previous shower – you assume. He's still drying his hair with a towel when he opens the door, but his ministrations stop the moment he lays his eyes on you.
You just give him an awkward smile that probably look more like a grimace.
"Hi."
The surprise is evident on Jungkook's face. Regardless, he is quick to get over it and gives you a big grin instead. An expression you did not expect to get.
"__, hey," Jungkook greets, placing the towel around his neck and letting go of his doorknob. "What brings you here?"
You balance your weight on your other side and purse your lips in a thin line.
"Do you, uh, wanna grab dinner?" You ask right away, not wanting to beat around the bush.
Jungkook's smile somehow grows wider at your question, and you don't know what to feel. If he's petty, he'll reject your invitation but with the look on his face right now, he doesn't seem to have the intention to do so. At least you hope so. It will be so embarrassing for you to have come all the way to his place instead of just asking him through text.
He was about to answer when somebody suddenly approaches the door.
"Jeon Jungkook?" The guy asks, and you immediately shot your eyes to look at him. With his printed shirt that reads a famous food delivery brand and his hands carrying bags of what you assumed take-out food, you figure what he's here for. "Here's your order, sir."
Embarrassed, you scoot to the side to give way to the food delivery guy and let him extend the bags towards Jungkook who grabs his wallet from the pocket of his sweats to pay for the food, thanking the man in the process.
He already has plans for tonight, you realize. Your invitation to dinner is futile because he already bought take-out.
The food delivery guy gave you a look before he took off in which you returned a timid smile for. And then, you turn around to look at Jungkook again.
"Nevermind, don't answer my question." You say, referring to your invitation prior to the arrival of his food delivery. "Uhm, bye. Good night."
You were just turning your heels to go the other way around when Jungkook suddenly speaks.
"Wait, don't go yet," Jungkook steps to the side and inserts his wallet back into his pants. He raises the bags of take-out and arches his brow towards your way, "Do you like Thai?"
"I do." You reply, not really understanding where he's getting at first.
Jungkook smiles. "Good. Do you wanna come inside?"
When you realize what he just said, you shake your head, "Oh, no, no. We could grab dinner outside tomorrow if you're free."
"This is enough for two?"
He's inviting you to his place. Is he insane?
You shake your head once again. "No, Jungkook, I really don't want to impose on—"
Jungkook cut you off with a hearty laugh.
"__, you won't be imposing. Come on, I bet you haven't had dinner yet either." When you don't answer, he insists again, "I think I have Thai tea around here somewhere."
You narrow your eyes at him.
"You think I'll go inside just 'cause you have Thai tea?" you say, raising your brow at him, challenging Jungkook to say something to that. He shrugs with a smile of amusement. Then you break your demeanor and sigh. "You're actually right. I can probably be bribed with daily boba supply."
Jungkook laughs at your absurd claim.
"No matter what's on the line?"
"Yeah," Then you decide to joke a little, "If you're the one on the line."
His laughter only becomes louder, and you shake your head at him because you genuinely wonder why he laughs so much at your nonsensical jokes. You would consider yourself funny but not that funny.
But this is good. Joking is good. This dynamic is surely better than you avoiding him.
"You're so..." Jungkook stops to look at you and you stare back at him. That moment stretches into a minute until you feel the hair on your nape stand.
It's the night air, and not at all the almost intimate way he looked into your eyes.
That's what you'll tell yourself tonight.
"I'm so what?" You decide to break the silence, seemingly snapping Jungkook out of the trance he's put himself in awhile ago.
He shakes his head. "Nothing."
"Okay, now you're just making me curious."
"It's nothing."
"Okay, I'm gonna let it pass this time..." you say, eliciting a low chuckle from him.
He must realize that you've both been standing on his porch for a while now.
"Come," he says, gesturing inside his place.
Your steps are a bit hesitant as you follow him inside. But nonetheless, you both get in, Jungkook offering you a pair of home slipper that are almost twice as big as your feet as he locks the door.
When you let your eyes wander, you're more than surprised to see the state of the interior.
Jungkook's place is surprisingly... clean.
Sure, it must be because there aren't any decorations or much furniture yet, but from your experiences with men, the one thing they have in common is that they are messy. It's almost impossible to not see clothes strewn all over their places or food wrappings on any surface at a corner, but Jungkook's is spotless.
Except maybe for the few boxes that stand beside the door of the room all the way across the room which you assume is his bedroom, but other than that, there's no indicator that a man is residing inside. Admittedly, it's even cleaner than your own.
"Sorry, it's a little messy. I haven't unpacked all of my stuff. Got busy."
He seems to notice you eyeing the aforementioned boxes, and hearing his words, you shake your head.
"Oh, no, trust me. This is the cleanest place I've ever seen." You say truthfully.
"Thanks." Jungkook responds with a smile.
His apartment, like yours, has an open layout so from where you are in the living room, you can see him putting the bags on the kitchen counter, unloading them and starting to transfer some of them into his own plates.
You approach his direction to find yourself useful.
"Is it okay if we eat at the coffee table? My table set hasn't arrived yet..." he rubbs the back of his head, a sheepish smile painting his face.
"It's fine."
His coffee table is wide enough for all the food to fit, anyway. That's what you thought when you bring all the food to the living room, sitting on the floorboards opposite of him.
Before you start dinner, Jungkook asks if you want to watch something on the TV.
"It's like a jumbotron." Is your throw-away comment when he turns on his huge ass TV. It's genuinely so big you aren't even exaggerating. You are not that good with estimation but the screen is probably the same height as you...
"What?" Jungkook chuckles, looking at you all confused.
"Nothing. Just that your TV is so big."
"Yeah? I wanted to buy this one for so long and I got really lucky to get it on sale here. I have the Criterion channel so I've been wanting to watch stuff with an OLED screen—" he cuts himself off and looks at you with a hint of embarrassment. "Sorry."
You look away before you can go on a spiral about how cute he looked with a proud smile on his face while he was going off about how he got his jumbotron on sale. He was geeking out about a freaking TV. But you guess it makes sense for a tech guy like him.
"Uh, what do you want to watch?" He asks, going through his streaming services.
The big TV and the streaming services just click so much in the context of him. You, in contrast, cannot relate. After forgetting to unsubscribe to Netflix a few months ago, it automatically stole the thirteen thousand won from your account, and since then, you're more than traumatized to pay for any streaming services until today. Pirating is bad but so is capitalism.
"Anything is fine."
"Okay."
You really couldn't have cared less about what he's going to click on, but National Geographic pops up on his big screen and you think he must be joking but he starts tuning in with genuine interest.
Oh. Wow.
He's just a big nerd trapped in a hot human body, huh?
How cute. And how unbelievably hot to discover this about him.
After a few minutes into the documentary, it turns out that whales are interesting to a certain degree. Sure, Jungkook's huge ass screen made it a little funny because the pictures are too big, but they did pique your interest a little, especially when Jungkook would add in a little of his own knowledge about them. When you asked him about the weird little stick thing on their mouth, he told you that they were tusks and only male narwhals had them, and that they used it as some sort of sensory tool. He admitted he hyperfixated on whales for a while when he saw them first on Discovery Channel as a kid.
You didn't even have to pretend to be engrossed, you were just in genuine awe of his interests and how enthusiastic he was about sharing them.
Food is starting to run out, making you realize that it's been awhile since you've eaten Thai food and you should probably eat them once again tomorrow.
You're just about to ask Jungkook which restaurant he got it from when he beats you to speaking first.
"You're still in your work clothes."
You stop.
"Yeah..."
And then you're reminded of why you're here in the first place.
It isn't for the whales or for Thai food, that's for sure.
You haven't changed out of your work clothes, indeed, since you planned going out for dinner in hopes of talking to Jungkook while ago. The night is going so well so far that you actually forgot about that. But then since he already cocked the gun, might as well just pull the trigger and get it over with.
You look at him, an uneasy feeling settling in your nerves.
"So... about your text earlier."
There is a hint of a smile on Jungkook's lips when he nods his head.
"Yeah?"
"It wasn't me." You say, trying to look for a reaction, trying to see if he'll insist or anything.
But Jungkook just nods his head again.
"I see."
He does not seem to see, though, and you know right then and there that your cover is finally and officially blown.
"Okay, I lied. That was me." You take back your words, jutting your bottom lip out when you add, "Turns out we work at the same company. And that you're apparently my boss."
"And you're my cousin's girlfriend."
You gasp audibly.
So he knows you were at that party! How? And what? He thought you were Jimin's girlfriend for real? Wait, does he not know it was all Jimin's ruse?
"How did you know that?"
"They mentioned Jimin's girlfriend was in the bathroom when I arrived. I asked Jimin about it and he told me her name was __."
You would face-palm yourself if Jungkook wasn't present.
Ugh. Of course, Jimin doesn't know.
"Well, okay, just so you know, I was a paid actress." You tell Jungkook, which earns you a laugh from him. Then you cover your mouth, realizing you shouldn't have said that. "Oh—uhm, do you know...?" You trail off, looking at him expectantly and hoping he knows what you meant.
You swear you remember Jimin telling you that Jungkook knows about him being gay, but now you are second-guessing yourself and you will be in trouble if you did slip up.
Thankfully, Jungkook nods, seemingly understanding where you're getting at.
"Don't worry, I know." You heave a sigh of relief at his verbal confirmation. Jungkook takes the tom yum goong and started peeling the shrimp from the bowl, continuing to say, "And Jimin brings a fake date to every family gathering, so I knew right away he was lying about dating somebody," Jungkook chuckles, and as if an afterthought, he adds, "I wish I could've seen you act. You two left so early."
Well... you did play a role in that, you think. But you can't tell him you purposefully didn't go back to the table that night because you saw him.
"Oh, Jimin had to send Joon off at the airport." You say, which is actually true. For a change.
He nods. "His boyfriend, yeah... did he go to Italy with him?"
You wonder how he knows about the Italy thing. Jimin, probably. They're close after all—
"Namjoon's a close friend as well." Jungkook adds, as if having read your thoughts.
"Ah," you nod, not surprised at all about their apparent link.
Wealthy people do have a tiny world.
"Jimin hasn't actually contacted me yet since that night."
It has been a few days, and you're starting to think he's dead or something. Your calls go straight to voicemail and your messages do not send. You've sent him a few on social media as well but it seems like he hasn't been online at all.
"I'm worried about him. Has Namjoon said anything?" You look at Jungkook, hoping he'll say yes.
But he shakes his head instead.
"I wouldn't be worried, though. I think they're together."
"In Italy?"
"Yeah."
You won't be surprised if that's the case. Jimin is the king of spontaneity and if he did fly off to another country abruptly with his boyfriend, you won't question it.
You do miss him though and you're gonna make sure to make him feel bad for not telling you anything soon.
"You're right." You sigh.
Jungkook has been peeling shrimp for awhile now, setting them aside in a small bowl. You think he's gonna eat it himself, but you're surprised when he slides off the bowl to your direction.
"There. I noticed you weren't eating the tom yum. You don't like it?" Jungkook asks, smiling at you.
You can't help it; blood rushes to your cheeks at the realization that he just peeled shrimps for you.
Is this normal for him? Like, does he just go around and do things like these for friends?
You will scream in your bathroom later when you get home.
"Oh, no, uh... I'm actually allergic to shrimp." You give him a tight-lipped smile.
You feel bad at the way Jungkook's expression drops as soon as you said that.
"Shit, sorry, I didn't know," He takes the small bowl quickly and looks at you apologetically.
"No, it's fine! I didn't tell you either."
"I'm really sorry. I should've asked first."
"Jungkook," you chuckle. "It's fine. Thank you, anyway."
"I could've done serious damage to you, huh?"
"Yeah, you'd have to tell Jimin you killed me because you fed me shrimp."
"Don't say that," Jungkook laughs. "How long are you friends now, by the way?"
You nip on your chopsticks, answering him.
"We've been friends since college... so almost ten years."
"That's really nice."
And then you remember to ask, "Did you tell him?"
"What?"
"That you know me?"
"No. Not yet, at least. Didn't have the chance." Jungkook proceeds to eat the shrimp himself and you have to keep yourself from letting out a breath of relief at his answer. "Did you tell him?"
"No. Uh— I know this is weird. But... can you not tell him?" You ask. Jungkook looks at you for a bit, studying your face. You clear your throat when seconds passed and he still hasn't said anything. "It's just that I want to tell him on my own time." You decide to add.
"Okay." He says after a while, smiling.
Thank god he doesn't ask any more questions.
"Thanks."
And now there's another elephant in the room that you still need to address.
A bit hesitant, you open with, "Did you uhm..." You think about how to word it, but then you think, fuck it. "Did you know by that time at the party that I work at Blue Nexus?"
Jungkook shakes his head.
"No, I saw you at the company and only put two and two together."
Your brows furrow. "When?"
"Uh... earlier this morning."
"Oh. Yeah..."
You don't know exactly why, but you feel a tinge of disappointment that he meant earlier. You really thought he recognized you at the ceremony.
But then you shake the feeling off and jokingly narrow your eyes at him. "Why didn't you tell me about the party, then?"
"Why, did you see me there?"
You shut your mouth. Right. You're supposed to pretend you didn't seen him that time.
"No." You lie.
"So I thought it didn't matter... though I was pretty surprised when I saw you today."
"Ugh, I thought I hid myself pretty well." You lament dramatically, embarrassed that you really thought covering your face with your hair would do you any good.
"Nah," Jungkook shakes his head while laughing at your misery, "I thought, "who is this five-foot woman hiding in the back","
"Wow." You gasp, not believing his audacity. But you're also thankful that he makes talking to him so easy. The way your conversations goes from funny to serious is so seamless, all because Jungkook knows exactly how to turn the wheels around.
"Kidding. I actually recognized you by your blouse..." he gestures at your baby blue polo sleeves, making you furrow your brows, not quite sure how he meant. But then, he continues, "Did the ink ever come off?"
Oh. Right! He had seen you wear the blouse before and even heard you tell him the story about how the jammed printer caused a blot of ink to stain your cuff.
You're surprised he even remembers that. It seems so long ago.
Raising your arm to examine the cuff area of your blouse, you look at it with small amusement.
"Yeah, it did, actually."
"How did you do it?"
You deadpan, "You're not asking me how I do my laundry, Jungkook."
"Hey, I love doing laundry," You raise your brow, not believing him, but Jungkook insists. "No, I really do."
"Okay." You nod, chuckling because he really seems way too eager to prove to you that he loves doing laundry.
What you've found out about him so far is so... mesmerizing, to say the least. With how he looks like – you meant, the tattoos and the body – you would most likely assume he likes guy stuff. You know, big macho man stuff like that. But turns out, he's just a guy who likes big TVs and NatGeo and... laundry.
He's such a fascinating person.
"I'm also not your boss." Jungkook suddenly says, making you look up at him.
"Well, you're CTO, you technically are." You point out.
"Technically, yes. But I don't oversee the accounting department, so you're not really working for me, which means I'm not your boss."
The mental gymnastics make you frown but you get his point.
"Okay, that's true. But still... your father is Mr. Jeon."
"Would you believe me if I denied that?" He jokes, the tilt in his voice telling you he is.
"You kind of look the same, so I probably wouldn't believe you."
"Really? A lot of people say I look more like my mother..."
You've seen the pictures. It's more of a split, really. But you can't tell him that obviously.
Silence sits in his living room for a while, the NatGeo narrator serving as background noise at this point.
You drop your chopsticks down and sigh. Jungkook looks at you with furrowed brows, worried about your sudden seriousness.
"So, you're not like weirded out about this whole thing?" You ask him straight to the point.
Joking is good, as you said. And this night is going better than you thought. But it feels like you are just glossing over the facts, and you need to address it with him lest it becomes a problem in the future. You don't know how exactly they are going to be; you just have a feeling in your heart that they are going to.
"The what?" Jungkook says, looking genuinely confused, as if he doesn't know what your deal is.
"The I'm-your-cousin's-best-friend? And the fact that you're an executive at the company I work at and we live in the same building?" You lay out, sounding exasperated now that you're taking it all out.
Jungkook stares at you for a bit.
"Why would that weird me out?"
He isn't being dense, you can see that. He's just plain confused.
You sigh once again. Seems like you've been doing a lot of that these past few days.
"Because it's just... too many eggs in the basket."
Jungkook chuckles, wiping his hands with a tissue. "Isn't it good you have many eggs in the basket?"
You glare at him, and it makes him raise his hands as a peace offering.
"It's bad because..."
"... because?" Jungkook, now with his hands clean, props an elbow on the coffee table, looking right into your eyes as he leans closer to your direction.
You look away.
"Because it means I can't hang out with you anymore."
When you look at him again, the smile is wiped off his face, suddenly exchanged with a frown.
"Why?"
"Because again, it's too many eggs in the basket and—" Running out with metaphors, you say the first thing that was off the top of your head, "That makes you my uncle."
Jungkook's jaw drops a bit.
"Your thought process really amazes me."
You grimace, already expecting that. "Thanks, I get that a lot."
"No, it's really... interesting."
He doesn't look judgmental at all, just full of genuine awe, but you're eager to come to your own defense and so you say, "You don't get it? It's like—" You fling your hands around, trying to explain what you just said. "You don't have a close relationship with your uncle, right? 'Cause it's awkward. When you're with them it's like being with your boss, which means you can't be friends with them 'cause, again, it's awkward."
Jungkook still looks like he doesn't know what the hell you're talking about, but he nods his head, nonetheless.
"Okay... but I have a very close relationship with the CEO..."
You pout. "That's not what I meant."
And when he chuckles at that, you know he's fucking with you and understand exactly what you were trying to say; fooling around as if you aren't having an internal crisis.
Jungkook must've seen how you're genuinely not finding anything funny and stops.
"Is that why you've been avoiding me the past few days?" He raises his brow, but his voice is gentle as he speaks.
You didn't think he'd confront you about that, but you decide to look away when you try to lie as an answer.
"No...?"
Jungkook only chuckle at your indignation.
"Okay, okay, let's divide and conquer, yeah?" He smiles at you. Warm and soft. "First, you're Jimin's best friend, what's the issue? It just means you must be a good person to hang around with because you're friends with the person I'm close to. Second, I'm not your boss, will you please stop saying that? And third, we're neighbors... so what? We just happened to rent in the same building. No big deal."
Your frown just gets deeper at what he said because... he's right. So right.
You overreacted the whole time you tried to hide from him.
With nothing else to add, you weakly ask, "Okay but... can you fire me?"
In your head, it's a relevant question. You don't know how the chain of command worked at the company. He's an executive which probably means he has firing rights, right? What if he finds you too rude towards him over the past few days that he wants to take your job away from you? Can he fire you because of personal vendetta?
"Asking the important question?" Jungkook teases.
"Damn straight, I am. I mean, I did complain to you about my job before, and it turns out you're one of the executives at the company."
"I can see the wheels in your head turning but sorry to say I'm not actually an official executive. I'm just an interim CTO. And no, I don't have the right to fire you," Jungkook chuckles, seemingly amused at your thoughts. "And you can complain to me about your job all you want."
You send him a suspicious look.
"No, thank you."
"Seriously?" He asks incredulously. "Interim CTO or Jimin's cousin or not, I'm still Jeon Jungkook. Just your plain ol' neighbor."
"You say that but what if I arrive to my desk tomorrow with my things packed because you told Ms. Jung all the things I told you about her?" You squint your eyes at him.
"God, you're unbelievable." Jungkook says in between his laughter.
"Okay, but I wanna ask you something." You say. Jungkook hums. "I'm curious... why here?"
It isn't like your apartment complex is abominable or anything of the sort. When you were still on the look-out of apartments five years ago, here was the only decent one that did not cause you a 3-month pay. It's why you chose it in the first place. The unit is big enough for yourself and it's located at the center of the city, which means that it's near establishments that are relevant to your daily living. The bus station is also just a few minutes walk, and it only takes you an hour commute to get to your company building. It was the best out of all your choices back then.
However, for a guy like Jungkook, you wonder why he isn't at the big shot complexes like in Cheongdam or Hannam. You don't doubt he can afford those.
But Jungkook surprises you with his answer.
"It's cheaper."
You can't help but raise your brow.
"What?" And then as if realizing your look, Jungkook chuckles. "Oh, I see... you think I'm, like, rich?"
You shrug.
Jungkook answer with a simple, "My parents are loaded. And anyway, it's near the company. I also really like it here so far. Hannam felt like prison when I stayed there in my first week. Guards were way too strict."
Nodding, you recall Jimin's stories about that gated community when he himself stayed there for merely three months. It makes sense for it to almost seem like prison, though, given that most people who live there are high profile.
"I commute on my way to work. What about you?"
"I bought a parking spot nearby; it's surprisingly cheap compared to America."
You wouldn't know because you've never had a car in your life. First of all, you refuse to apply for a driving license because you're sure you'll kill yourself on the road. Besides, cars are expensive. You'll stick to your buses and trains all your life even though commuting sucks ass sometimes.
But you nod at Jungkook's words.
Soon, you both engage in more conversation about yourselves until you notice the time.
"It's getting late, I should go. I have work tomorrow." You tell him with a pout, genuinely disappointed about having to go.
Jungkook looks over at the clock hanging on his wall and then turns to you, "We have work tomorrow, you mean."
You blush at that for no reason.
"Well..."
"Okay, I'll walk you to your place."
"What?" You laugh. "That's ridiculous."
"What's ridiculous about it? You're so short, the crickets might attack you." Jungkook says with a serious face.
That makes you frown instantly.
"Ugh, you've got to stop saying that. I'm starting to dislike you."
"Hmm."
Jungkook indeed followed you on your way out, though, but not without you insisting that he didn't need to walk you to your door because it was literally just across his, but Jungkook was persistent and you had no choice but to walk the five steps it took to get in front of your apartment from his own.
He's still laughing when your face is still contorted into an unpleasant expression.
"Okay, good night." You say. You point to his chest absent-mindedly, but you quickly take it back when you feel how hard it is. "A-and stop calling me short, I'm not. The __ karma is real, I have Jimin to prove that."
"Fine, I'll stop." Jungkook smiles, watching as you enter your threshold.
"Good."
You stand on your door, leaning over the frame and not closing it just yet.
Jungkook gives you a heart-warming smile before he says, "See you tomorrow."
And he speaks the words so gently that you feel your cheeks heating once again.
"S-see you as well."
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"You look banging in that polo shirt." Jimin says, obviously chatting you up because the moment you accepted his call earlier this morning, you did not hesitate to tell him off about going MIA on you so suddenly.
"It's literally just a plain white polo."
"Okay, and you still look good in it, so..." He shrugs, but you can see the look on his face, sheepish and apologetic.
You scoff.
"You can't compliment me out of sulking. I'm mad at you."
There's a pout that forms on his lips quickly; a tactic so predictable you almost roll your eyes.
"I know... but I told you! Joon and I spent the last week—"
"Fucking each other to Sunday and back, blah blah blah. Still, you could've told me you went to Italy, you slut."
Jimin lets out a loud laugh at your blunt words.
"Slut shaming in the big year of 2028? I thought you were better than that." He shakes his head, pretending to be pointed and curt with the bitchy look on his face. But you know he's just teasing to get you out of your own bitchy mode as well.
It works every time.
You don't fight the way your eyes roll on their own accord as a response this time. Jimin compromises, "Okay, I'm sorry! For not telling. It's just that I've turned off my phone for the past week because I'm sure dad and his secretary are going to blow up my phone— they are, by the way, so cut me some slack."
Forgiveness comes easy when you take into consideration what he's been through for the past few weeks. The spontaneous trip to Italy and him flying along with his boyfriend may come off as immature, but you know deep inside he's just wanting to get away from the reality of his life: which is pretty much toxic family with incredibly high expectations and boring ass management school.
You are certain they are giving him shit, and you don't need to add more to that.
It's 7:20 and you're currently prepping for work. Privacy is almost moot in your friendship with Jimin, so you're quite literally dressing up in front of him on call, sweeping your hair to the side as you pull up your trousers.
"Okay... are you having fun there?" You ask instead.
Jimin smiles a knowing grin. "Babe, I just told you me and my boyfriend are having sex 24/7 in here, I'm having the most fun in my life."
You button your trousers and groan at his words.
"I wish I was also in Italy."
"I mean, you could."
You give him a look.
"And what? Third wheel you and Joon? No thanks."
Jimin just shrugs, the angle of his camera going shaky for a bit as he moves to lay on what you assume is his bed.
"I don't know, girl, maybe you'll find a nice Italian man here."
That earns him a snort from you while you duck to wear your sandals.
"I've long forgotten that fantasy since I was 19."
"You're not a stranger to relapsing..." Jimin clocks and that makes you shoot up straight so he can see the look of incredulity on your face as an immediate reaction to what he just said.
"Rude!"
Jimin just snorts. "Okay but for real, how are things going over there for you?"
You sigh. "Same old, same old. Pretty and single and working a very boring job."
Your best friend can't help but mirror the wince on your face.
"You could change the last two but never the first one, babe. So, you see, you're still miles ahead." He says as a matter of fact, sounding like he's giving out some sort of motivational speech.
"Lucky me," you noted with a straight face. You start rummaging your bag to see if you got everything you need. Then, there's something at the tip of your tongue. Something you've been wanting to open up to him. So, you start by clearing your throat – subtly, you hope.
"But you know, life's pretty... eventful the past few days."
Jimin quirks his eyebrow at that, obviously catching onto what could possibly be a new news.
You bite your lower lip, nibbling on it slightly as you contemplate whether to tell him about what you've been up to.
For some weird reason, you still haven't told him about Jungkook, and it seems like Jungkook has made good on his promise not to tell your best friend because if he did break it, Jimin would be inquiring you all about it now.
You figure now is sort of the perfect time to... maybe tell him.
"Uh, well... not eventful, per se, just a little..." you trailed off, finding a bit of uncertainty in your voice. You see Jimin's face morphing into more of a confused look rather than intrigued as the second passes. Pursing your lips into a thin line, you finish your previous sentence with, "Just a little different, I guess."
"Don't edge me, I swear to god." Jimin threatens playfully, making you chuckle.
"It's not something groundbreaking, okay? It's just the, uh, do you still remember Mr—"
The yawn that Jimin lets out stops you from completing your words, and you remember him mentioning a while ago that it's currently midnight from where he is.
"Ugh," Jimin groans, "Sorry, I slept so late yesterday. Anyway, go on, what were you saying?"
The uncertainty you felt a while ago increases, and you decide that maybe, now is so not the perfect time to bring up Jungkook, his cousin.
So, you shake your head, smiling at him, packing the words of your confession in a box that that you place at the back of your head, ready for unpacking when the time calls for it – which you don't exactly know when.
"Nah, go to sleep. This conversation can wait."
"You're gonna kill me with curiosity."
Rolling your eyes, you make a gesture of shoving him.
"I have to catch up with my bus soon, anyway." You say, dodging his insistence.
"Just tell me pretty please, I won't be able to sleep!" He dramatically says.
You roll your eyes again at the theatrics.
"It's really nothing big."
Well, it is. Sort of. Or maybe it's not, and you're just doing that thing again where you put too much thought over something inconsequential.
You swear you were ready to tell him about Jungkook, having even hyped yourself in the bathroom a few days ago and practicing what you're going to tell Jimin. But as of this moment, right now, it suddenly feels... unimportant. Not in a negative way. Just in a... does-it-really-matter way.
Jimin will find out eventually. But not now when you're not totally ready.
"I know what this is," Jimin suddenly says. At his suspicious tone, your heart starts to pick up the rate of its beat. You can see the way Jimin squints his eyes at you, and you wish he doesn't see the way you're slightly frozen. "You got back with your ex, Hansung."
You hope he sees the disgust on your face the moment he let out the words.
"Oh my god, hell no!" Is your instant response. Just hearing that name again made the hairs on your nape rise. "Jimin, what the fuck."
Jimin rolls his eyes. "You look so nervous, that's how you look like when you're about to tell me you've done something stupid."
Okay, fair. The assumption is coming from a valid basis. It makes you frown at him.
"You're such a bitch." Jimin laughs at the way you deflate. You let out a sign. "It's just... Taemu. From the IT dep."
"That guy?!" He exclaims and quickly covers his mouth. "The cute guy you refused to date a second time... you're finally dating him again?"
"What do you mean, finally?" You narrow your eyes at him, surprise at the positive comment about Taemu. "Jesus, I thought you were with me when I said I found him boring."
"What can I say? He can be cute and boring." He points out, as if he did not talk behind the Taemu's back when you ranted about the guy to him.
"You're fake as hell." You laugh, unbelieving.
Jimin joins your laughter, finding his sudden switch up funny as well.
"But you're, for real, dating him again? It means he still likes you?" He asks, obviously intrigued at this newfound information.
Unfortunately, it's a bit of a lie. You feel bad, but it is a great scapegoat to dodge the bullet of the conversation about Jungkook.
"I don't know... we're talking."
Which, for once, is true. Taemu and you did not exactly end on a good note (courtesy to you, boo), but you work in the same company, after all. There are times in the company's cafeteria where you bump into him, and it would have felt weird if you just snub him and act like you did not have an acquaintanceship before he asked you out to a date. Taemu's ultimately still your friend, and there are no hard feelings on his part, you can confidently say. He's... nice, you guess. Somehow of an afterthought. You're starting to think you completely misjudged him on your first date.
You take a quick trip to the fridge to grab a glass of cold water since Jimin is on loudspeaker anyway.
"That reminds me," Jimin suddenly quips. You hum to acknowledge him. "My cousin now works at your company, right? You still remember Jungkook? Have you met him yet?"
You couldn't help it; the water splattered all over the place when you heard Jungkook's name from his mouth.
Jimin quickly asks you a series of "are you okays" and you respond with a "yes" that's interrupted with a cough every time; a weak nod with a raised hand, telling him not to worry.
"Water just got in the wrong track." You reason, coughing and slapping your chest to regain your breathing. When you see wet spots on your shirt, you let out a whiny groan.
"You're so jumpy today. You're sure you're fine?" Jimin checks once again, and you have to bite your tongue to not show the way you froze a little at his observation.
You nod at him, showing him an expression that hopefully conveys he's the one being weird and definitely not you.
"Yeah, it's fine." You look down on your shirt. You're debating whether to stick with it and just let it dry in the bus later or completely change out of it. "But uh, your cousin! I did see him. We had a ceremony a week ago."
You would've said that with a smile, but Jimin knows you too well that he'll surely know it's fake. So, you spoke with an almost straight face. What Jimin says next surprises you a bit, though.
"I hope you meet each other," Jimin's excitement is visible on his face. "It'd be kinda fun; my closest cousin and my best friend... imagine that? I think you'll like each other." He seems to be so geeked about the idea that even when you're internally having a crisis, you can't help but find it cute. But then his smile gets wiped off his lips just as quickly as it showed. "It'd be awkward, though. He's, kinda like, your boss, right?"
You suddenly remember Jungkook's words about him not being your boss. It makes your lips curl, but you have to shake off the thought.
You give him a hesitant look.
"Well, not really, but he's an executive. So... it would be awkward. I guess."
Jimin nods, agreeing with you.
"It's crazy though, I never thought he'd be working at uncle's company so soon..." He trails off and he looks deep in thought, like his words were just supposed to be inner thoughts and you're not supposed to hear them. But he shakes his head after a while, moving on to another subject that makes you quietly sigh in relief. "Anyway, I'm sure I'm keeping you up. I'll sleep and you better tell me all about Kang Taemu when I wake up, okay?"
You chuckle, shaking your head at the threatening tone of his voice.
"I will. When will you come home, anyway?"
He groans, obviously not wanting to discuss home for the reasons you know exactly what. He confirms your assumption by telling so.
"Honestly, I don't know. I'm trying to avoid responsibilities as much as I can. God, I wish you were also here. There's a bar Joon and I discovered that sells these insane bottomless mimosas."
Before you could reply, Jimin goes off the frame suddenly, but the lower part of his face makes you see the way his lips curling up into a smile and saying, "Hey, hon."
There's a greeting from another person on the other end of the line – one that you are certainly familiar with.
Jimin moves his camera and as expected, you see Namjoon waving at you.
"Hey, __,"
You mirror the smile on his face. "Hi, Joon."
"Let's not keep her up. She has to go to work," Jimin tells Namjoon. "Anyway, bye. Kick some ass at work."
Laughing, you tell them, "I'll be off. Good night to you both."
When the call ends, you look down to your shirt once again, seeing that the little wet spots still haven't dried yet. Sighing, you decide to change out of it because it looked untidy.
Too bad you didn't check the time when you were doing it though, because as soon as you were done buttoning the new shirt you've worn, the clock hits 7:55 am. You bus arrives at exactly 8 am.
"Shit." You hiss, scrambling out of the apartment hoping that you can somehow run your way fast to the station and hop on it on time.
But you're no The Flash or Usain Bolt. To piss you off more, the strap of your bag got caught up with the handle of your door.
"What the fuck is wrong with you?!" You whisper, hastily untangling the strap off the door which won't let up.
"__?" As soon as you hear the familiar voice, you stop with what you were doing and turn to Jungkook, conjuring up a what you can only hope a pleasant enough smile.
"Hey!" You say, chirpy in that weird way. You hope he didn't catch you cursing the door.
But with the way he was looking at your hand on your door, you knew he did.
Sigh. He just really has to catch you in your most vulnerable moments, huh?
"Good morning," Jungkook greets with a smile, ignoring the case at hand. As usual, he looks put together with his sleek suit and styled hair and eyeglasses.
"Morning," You say, slowly taking off the strap around the handle, gentle and slower this time.
Fucking door handle, you thought bitterly.
As you do that, you catch a glimpse of your wristwatch. Shoot.
You look back at Jungkook apologetically, moving away from your porch. "Nice seeing you. I have to catch my bus."
"When is it coming?"
"At exactly... two minutes from now. Bye! Gotta run!" You were about ready to literally run but Jungkook calls out your name.
"Wait!"
You stop coming down the flight of stairs to ask him, "What?"
"I can drive us together there."
"Oh," You slap your hands on your trousers. "That's so nice of you. Thank you—" And then suddenly, his words register, and you take back your quick agreement. You hate that you're so slow sometimes, but it's innate at this point. "I mean, no! That's a nice offer, but no, thank you."
"You won't catch your bus at this point," Jungkook says as a matter of fact, even taking a quick glance at his own watch. He begins to walk down the stairs to walk with you. "It only takes thirty minutes to drive by car to the company." When it takes you long to answer, Jungkook insists, already predicting the "no" that you're going to hit him with. "Come on, do you want to be late?"
"No."
Jungkook smiles at you. "Okay, so...?"
You purse your lips into a thin line, blowing your bangs and giving him a sheepish look.
"Okay, fine. But I owe you."
The smile on his face only grows wider. "More than fine by me."
He leads you both to the parking building nearby where his car was, only taking about a few minutes to walk towards.
When Jungkook points at his car, you follow his behind him shortly, stopping on the one side of the door. You're just about to open it when you feel Jungkook looming behind you, his hand extended forward to open the same door. You stretch your neck to look at him in question, making sure to keep a decent distance between you both.
"Uh...?" You utter.
And then it hits you.
He's trying to open the door for you.
You take a step back after the realization, feeling shy about the prospect of such a chivalrous act from him.
"This is the driver's seat."
"Oh!" You exclaimed. Eyes widening, you walk backwards to give him more space. "Yeah! Fuck... sorry," You apologize, cheeks starting to heat in embarrassment.
You round about the car and enter the passenger seat quickly, seeing Jungkook already set in his own place. You look to the side, almost pressing yourself to the window just so he won't see the way you wince.
So fucking embarrassing. This is exactly what you write about in your diary during high school days.
"Your seatbelt," Jungkook says, and you look at him with widened eyes. Right. You were way too deep in embarrassment that you forgot about it. You fiddle with the seatbelt a few seconds before he speaks once again, "Let me."
And you couldn't have stopped him from leaning closer to you to grab the seatbelt and wear it around your waist, carefully and gently, making you hitch your breath at the sudden proximity.
Of course you've noticed it way before, but this is the first time you were close enough to deduce that he smells like green apple and fresh laundry. A little different from the musky scent that you were used to smelling on men that you've been with before.
"There." He smiles at you before sitting back on his chair, wearing his own seatbelt.
You are way too stunned to acknowledge what he did that for the first few minutes, you're just quiet, mind flying to some place. You only snap out of it when Jungkook speaks again.
"Slept late last night?"
You shake your head at his question. "No... just facetime with Jimin this morning. You were right to tell me not to worry, he's with Joon."
Jungkook nods at your words, turning the ignition of the car. He starts to reverse, and you feel yourself growing embarrassingly hot when he does the thing of putting his arm around the back of your seat while the other spins the wheel, stretching his neck to look back.
You decide to look away for your own sake.
"Uh, anyway, I'm really sorry."
"Hm?" Jungkook hums, eyes on the road as he starts driving.
If you think about it, you were just at his place a few nights ago eating dinner with him, and now, you somehow find yourself in his car as he drives you both to work. His constant kindness is not lost on you... but Jungkook's casualty makes it seem like this is just his plain nature.
You quirk your head to the side.
"Are you free later for lunch?"
"I can arrange my sched. Why?"
"Do you want to go together?" You ask. You'd say the offer is a form of compensation for his help today, but getting lunch together for the pure sake of it doesn't sound bad, either. Both works, so you're only a bit hopeful as you try to look for his reaction.
Jungkook has a hint of surprise on his face when he takes a quick look at you before turning his attention back on the road.
"Really?" There's a little lilt to his voice, as if he's not surer if you're being serious.
You shrug to appear casual. "If you're not too busy, that is."
He shakes his head, smiling. "Where are we going?"
"You're gonna find out later." You tell him. Jungkook cocks his head to the side, intrigued.
"Okay... where should I meet you, then? At your office?"
"Oh, god, no." Is your quick response. Jungkook immediately looks at you in offense, but it's more like amusement when he stares longer. At that, you wave your hand so he doesn't get the wrong idea. "No, no, I mean— it's just rude if an executive, like, comes to our office."
"You're still not hung up on the boss thing?" You roll your eyes at his teasing tone which earns a hearty chuckle from Jungkook. He shakes his head playfully at you. "I doubt anyone would care."
You jut your bottom lip out because he's probably right. But still, your co-workers would ask, and you're not trying to dig yourself a hole by making yourself news of the day because the newly appointed interim CTO just walked into your office for what? Lunch? The HR would have a field day.
"Maybe we can meet at the parking lot?" You offer, thinking it's the sensible place.
Jungkook smiles. "Alright."
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You had to stay behind Joonhwi and Sol as lunch came, making an excuse about going out with a friend as opposed to not coming with them. In your head, you think you were doing Joonhwi a favor.
After that, you were welcomed with text from Jungkook when you turned on your phone. It said he was already at the basement where he parked earlier, so it wasn't exactly hard to spot him right away the moment you got there.
The drive to your destination was quick enough to only amount to around fifteen minutes. As soon as Jungkook managed to park his car somewhere, you lead him to where the place you'd chosen for lunch.
When he finally registered where you were, his amusement does not go unnoticed.
"I've always wanted to go here," He tells you, looking around the stores in-line by the street.
You look back at him in surprise.
"You haven't been here?" Jungkook nods and you want to ask him if he's kidding around, but then you realize he's no ordinary person like most of the people you know in your life, recalling that Jimin's first time in a marketplace like this was only when you introduced him to it during sophomore year. "But you eat street food, right?" You ask him, even though you know he does. You did spend nights on that food truck around your building.
"Of course I do," Jungkook chuckles, rubbing a hand at the back of his head, seemingly shy. "I just never tried it here."
You give him a wide grin. "You're gonna enjoy it here. Follow me, I have a favorite store here that sells really good hotteok."
You spent the better part of the morning thinking about the place where you can bring him, opting out of going to cafes and restaurant because it was just getting kind of old. Aside from the fact that you stopped going to the food truck across your apartment building, it's also been a while since you enjoyed some street food yourself. You're also delighted to know that this is apparently Jungkook's first time going here.
The area is usually livelier in the later hours of the night, but there are still a lot of people by lunch time. Students, civilians, tourists... a usual day in Seoul, you can say.
When you reach the hotteok stall, you ask for your usual right away, almost asking the same thing for Jungkook but remember that he might actually want something else.
"Do you want other flavors instead?" You look back at him while he stands behind you with his hands in his pockets. He's forgone the coat – it's somewhere in his car seat – which left him with his usual polo shirt, sleeves folded up to his forearms. He kind of looks broody with his stance and you know... the exposed tattoos – but he looks adorable when he gives you that familiar easy-going smile at your question.
"I'll have whatever you're having."
You're hungry for a while now so you don't wait a long time to take a bite of the hotteok when it's finally served. It's hot, and Jungkook laughs as you learn it the hard way, sputtering as you move the food away from you.
"Fuck!" You curse, blowing air and fanning your mouth which doesn't really do anything.
"Slow down," Jungkook says in between his chuckles. You feel his arm resting on your back as some sort of support. "I'll get you some water."
It only takes him a few seconds to stop by a nearby stall to get you some bottled water, and you thank him after drinking it quickly.
"Sorry 'bout that," You apologize, smiling sheepishly.
"There's a—" Jungkook gestures at his mouth. You arch your brow at him, a bit confused. He tries again. "Something in your—" He interrupts himself, shaking his head, and takes out a handkerchief from the depths of his slacks.
Your immediate reaction is to take a few steps back when he goes to wipe at your mouth. Jungkook stops, pausing his movement. You give him an awkward thumbs up which prompts him to continue.
"Done."
You choose to gloss over that occurrence, taking another bite of hotteok after that.
"You know I always wondered why I don't see you going out of your apartment every morning." You start a conversation while you walk together mindlessly.
"You wonder... why?" Jungkook looks at you for a brief moment. With a teasing grin, he says, "You wanna see me every day?"
You gasp.
"Gross, Jungkook." You say, absolutely scandalized at what he said.
He just laughs, shaking his head, amused at your reaction. It makes you roll your eyes.
"I just figured you don't commute so you don't need to leave early." You tell him.
You notice he seems to be extra playful today.
"Oh, yeah, that's right."
"Lucky you. I'm so sick of commuting."
"You don't like driving?"
You shake your head, "I don't know how to drive, and I don't have any intention to."
"I think I've heard that from Joon before." Jungkook chuckles.
"Oh yeah, he told me one time he'll most probably kill himself if he drives. Which– same."
Jungkook bites on his hotteok, chews on it for a while before saying, "That's what I thought when I started to drive a motorcycle."
You almost snap your head to look at him.
"You drive a motorcycle?" You ask, just to be sure you heard him right.
Jungkook nods. "Hm."
"Oh, wow... that must be..." You trail off, looking blankly ahead of you.
Well, now you can't get it out of your head. Jungkook riding a motorcycle with his tattoos out. Jungkook riding a motorcycle with a leather jacket.
Ugh. You told yourself you were gonna forget about the stupid crush! This is so counterproductive. There's nothing special about a man who drives a motorcycle! Not at all.
"Must be...?" Jungkook curiously asks you.
"Nerve-wracking." You say, which you think is a fair answer. He doesn't have to know that you're thinking about a totally different thing.
He nods. "It was for the first time. Mom always gives me an earful whenever I use it." He shakes his head while laughing.
You can't help but ask.
"You're close with your mom?" It only registers to you that the question must be way too privy, but Jungkook doesn't seem to think so as he answers casually right away.
"Yeah. She was really glad when I came home."
You smile. You once thought he's close with his family... turns out you aren't exactly wrong.
"That's sweet."
He just gives you a soft smile. "You?"
"Oh, me? She, uh, died awhile ago. So."
The smile on Jungkook's face falters.
"That... sucks."
"Thanks." And then it makes you laugh. "You know most people say sorry. You're the first one to say it sucks."
"I..." Jungkook seems to track back on what he said. "I mean, I'm sorry, of course. But it must suck, right? I just... love my mom a lot. Can't imagine losing her."
You nod, completely understanding where he's coming from.
All your life, people have always felt sorry for you for losing your mom, your only parent. Of course, you're thankful for the sympathy, but sometimes... you just need someone to be real with it. Someone to say it sucks – because losing a parent is hard. Losing a mother suck.
"You're not so bad, Jungkook." you comment after a while, and as you take a quick look at Jungkook, you see him in another light. The same light you see a person in when you figure you want to befriend them and be in their life.
"What do you mean by that?" Jungkook asks with an arched brow.
You shake your head, smile not going away.
"Nothing!"
Jungkook annoyed you some more about it and you had to laugh at his curiosity because it was funny the way he insisted about something really inconsequential. Even when you went to another stall to buy some drinks, he still tried to bring up the same thing, but you're more stubborn than him so of course his efforts did not bear any fruit.
After a while, you sit on some bench while you eat tornado fries.
"I don't like this." You say, looking at your stick and frowning. Turning to Jungkook, you extend your tornado fries to him. "Try this one."
He takes a bite from your own stick. Surprisingly, he seems to like it.
"You wanna exchange?" He offers his cheesy tornado fries in exchange with your sour barbecue-flavored one. You nod, taking it from him. Jungkook chuckles at you. "I told you to get that one."
"I was feeling experimental." You tell him simply.
When you were in front of the stall, you told him how you didn't like sour barbecue at all but still wanted to give it a try. Obviously, that did not go well. Good thing Jungkook bought the cheesy flavor, though.
From your peripheral vision, you see a group of what seems to be a group of teenage girls sitting on the bench across from you. Judging from the very familiar uniform, they're in high school. They've been there for a while now and you notice they've been stealing glances at your direction.
You glance at Jungkook and snort.
"Looks like someone here has some admirers from Seoul High School." You tease Jungkook. He does not seem to notice the girls at all, looking at you with confusion first before turning his head to look across.
In a second, Jungkook turns uncomfortable in his seat.
"That's Seoul High School?"
You laugh at the obvious way he ignores them looking at him. Still, you nod your head at his question, "Yup. Went there."
You subtly look at the girls' direction again, catching them do the same and you can just see Jungkook's ears getting red by the second, visibly embarrassed at the unwanted attention.
"That's just across my high school." He casually says, trying so hard not to mind the girls.
"No way!" You gasp. "Yongsan International?"
He nods.
"The cheerleading teams on both schools used to have, like, this big beef before, you know that?" You tell him, ready to lay out the huge gossip that happened in your batch. And then you remember, "Oh. You've probably graduated when I entered senior year in high school."
Jungkook gives you a look. "Rude. I'm not that old."
The sass comes unexpectedly which makes you laugh out loud you almost choke on the fries.
You were just about to tease him some more when somebody approaches you both.
"U-uhm..."
When you both look at the girl, she's one from the group who was shamelessly looking towards your direction, which is obviously aimed at a specific someone by your side, Jungkook.
"Hi!" You greet cheerfully.
The girl blushes and then turns to Jungkook.
"O-oppa..." She utters, hesitant when she pulls something out of her skirt pocket. It's a small, crocheted sunflower.
You coo at the sight, looking at Jungkook in amusement. The man beside you just grow more uncomfortable in his seat. He looks so constipated, god bless him.
"My friend told me to give this to the eonni beside you."
Your smile is quickly wiped off your face the moment her words sink in, confusion slowly coming to paint your expression. You look at the girl but before you can say anything, she's already walking away as soon as Jungkook takes the crocheted flower from her. You watch as she and her friends ran, their figures slowly disappearing from your line of sight.
"Looks like you got admirers from Seoul High School." Jungkook quips beside you. "For the eonni beside me." He teases, extending the cute little flower to you.
Hesitantly, you take the flower from his hands.
"You know, it suits you." Jungkook says when you don't say anything, still stunned from the literal turn of events.
You look up, baffled. "Huh?"
"A sunflower. It suits you... you're like it." He smiles, soft and gentle. There's a look of fondness in his eyes that you couldn't have mistaken for anything else. "I'm glad they gave that to you."
You open your mouth to speak, but there's nothing at the tip of your tongue.
Shying away from his gaze, you mumble a low, "Thank you."
You don't think you hear his next word right.
"Cute."
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You have a hobby of collecting hobbies instead of focusing on one thing to be good at, jumping from one activity to another, even if it means abandoning your previous thing. Hobbies for most people means time lent to be better with it every day, but in your defense, you don't necessarily think you have to be good at something.
You've tried drawing. You've tried dancing. You've tried the guitar and you've tried the ukelele and you've tried crocheting and you've tried to study astrology. You've built three huge boxes of storage containing the needed materials for each of them, but they end up collecting dust.
Why can't a hobby just stay as a hobby, anyway? Why can't you just feel goofy one day to suddenly start drawing and give up the next day the moment you realize shading is hard? Why can't you just buy dress patterns and only sew the skirt part because tops are complicated to sew? Why can't you just learn four guitar chords because it's enough to play at least five songs using them?
None of it matters, you think. People will pressure you to push and push until you can possibly capitalize on something you're good at, but it just isn't the case for you.
You'll collect all the hobbies in the world until your head is full of random things and you just burst with it.
And true to your words, you find yourself wandering about in the baking aisle of your local grocery store at the late evening hours.
Yep. It's 2028 and your hobby pick for the year is baking.
So, what if you're a disaster in the kitchen? Cooking and baking are two different worlds! At least that's what Google tried to tell you a while ago when you were cleaning your bathroom earlier this morning, suddenly craving for some matcha cookies after you were done.
It sounded about right in your head that you decided to pick up ingredients for it, deciding it will be your dinner. At the back of your head, you think you should've just gone to the hundred cafes surrounding your apartment complex like, you know, any regular person would if they're craving something. But you figured that if you know how to bake, you could get matcha cookies anytime you want.
What can you say? You like to live life on edge. (You'll probably burn yourself in the oven later, but that will just be another lesson that life is soon to give you. You're just taking it in advance.)
But living on edge doesn't mean getting your card declined when you turn it to the cashier to supposedly pay for your grocery.
"I'm so sorry, uhm, can I have a few seconds, please?" You tell the cashier, giving her an awkward smile as you grab your wallet from your tote bag again, taking your card from her. You take another one of your debit cards this time and offer it to her, subtly looking around in hopes that no one is watching.
"Oh, we don't accept debit cards issued by this bank, ma'am." She says, and you're just about ready to dig yourself a hole from this complete, utter embarrassment.
"Okay..." you trail off nervously, glancing at the computer to look at your total. "I'll just pay in cash."
You do not, in fact, have enough cash.
You can tell the cashier is getting impatient from the way she shifts her weight from one side to another, and you keep yourself from making eye contact with her, fumbling with your wallet.
Three hundred and sixty-five days in a year and your card chose to decline on this very particular day. Why don't they accept your debit card? And why don't you have enough cash with you? Are you really this broke?
This is going to be a disaster. You can't afford to go to prison for this. Can you even go to prison for not paying grocery? Okay, maybe jail time for like 12 hours? But you have work tomorrow!
"Excuse me, miss,"
Somebody says but you refused to look at whoever it was, still counting the bills in your wallet that do not even accumulate to half the amount of your total.
"You can charge her bill here."
At that, your head quickly snap to the owner of the voice only to reveal himself as no other than Jeon Jungkook.
You swear you almost sigh in relief at the sight of him and have the sudden urge to hug him big time.
Jungkook looks at you and gives you a smile.
"Hi."
"Jungkook," you breathe. "Thank god you're here."
The cashier looks at you both weirdly but nonetheless swipes the card Jungkook gave her., instructing him to type his code on the key pad. There's nobody in line for the cashier you went to other than you both because it is too late an hour to be getting groceries, so Jungkook is able to butt in seamlessly and get his cart checked out as well.
"You're very much welcome." He says warmly.
Jungkook's dressed just as casually as you; a combination of simple white t-shirt and shorts and a pair of sliders. His grocery contains a lot different than yours, showing all sorts of food ingredients. You wait for his stuff to get bagged until you both head out of the store.
His car was just parked nearby, so you follow him towards its direction to apologize.
"I'm so, so sorry for earlier. I'll pay you later when we get home, of course." You say, just now registering how embarrassing it is for him to catch you in that situation. You're no stranger to getting your card declined... but really, now?
You decide to add awkwardly, "Or... do you have Kakao Pay?"
Jungkook chuckles while he opens his trunk, picking up his bags of groceries to place them in there. He shakes his head, keeping his hand outstretched to upwards to hold the hood of his car.
"It's fine. Don't worry about it."
You're about to speak in protest when he gestures at the bag in your hands, as if asking you to place it in the trunk as well. You shake your head repeatedly.
"No, it's okay, I'm just gonna take a cab home." You say, pointing to your back where the street is, politely refusing his obvious offer to drive you home.
He's done too much in the span of ten minutes you've seen each other tonight. He's paid for your groceries for heaven's sake, and he still has the intention to drive you again to your destination? Not adding the fact that he also just drove you to work yesterday to keep you from being late. It's like he's just doing you heaps of favors and so far, you've done nothing in return.
"__, please, I'm offering." Jungkook insists. As usual. "I really don't mind."
Shoulders deflating, you let out a sigh.
"It's just that..." You start, nibbling on your bottom lip.
"What?"
"You've just been doing me a lot of favors lately." You say, looking away from his gaze.
Jungkook calls your name gently. You train your gaze at him. He steps closer to you and gives your shoulder a soft tap. "Hey, I'm not counting."
The words in itself aren't all that special, but the way he said it and the way he looked at you while he did may have just did a little damage to your heart because why did it seem so genuine?
Still, you shy away.
"It's just really embarrassing." You say, out of argument now.
Jungkook lets out a sound of amusement and takes the bag from your hands. He didn't even give you the chance to protest before he managed to put it successfully in the trunk of his car, together with his own groceries.
"Why don't you pay me back by helping me make dinner tonight?" Jungkook muses.
You give him a weird look.
"You really want me in a kitchen? Have you not listened to my horror stories this whole time, Jungkook?"
He laughs as he leads you both inside his car. You follow quietly behind but this time, you don't mistake the passenger seat from the driver's seat and instantly wear your seatbelt as soon as you're sat.
"I dunno, I'm just offering. I thought it'll be fun." He shrugs, turning on the ignition of the car and starting to drive back to the apartment building.
"Okay, I can at least chop some onions and garlic..." You trail off. And then you remember as an afterthought, "Oh, I'm actually baking tonight as well."
Jungkook takes a quick surprise glance at you. "You never told me you know how."
You snort. "I don't know how, trust me. I'm just starting right now."
"Is that why you went out grocery shopping tonight?" He arches a brow.
"Yep. Totally a spontaneous thing. I wanted, like, this very specific matcha cookie..."
Jungkook laughs. "Should I help you with the baking as well? I might learn from you."
"Really? You want to help?" You ask him delightfully.
He nods, making your grin wider.
"Sounds fun."
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You both agreed to cook and bake at his place, partly because you personally are not ready for him to see your own flat. When you get inside his unit, Jungkook cutely bragged about his table set that just arrived earlier this morning according to him.
Personally, you've barely cooked at your own place let alone somebody else's. The one time you were in someone else's kitchen was Jimin's but even then, it was just to microwave some pizza and other take-out food.
It should feel weird to be prepping ingredients with someone, to move around the kitchen with the goal to make yourself a homecooked meal – especially with somebody like Jungkook – but truthfully, it felt almost... natural. Probably because you're conversing casually while you're doing things so there isn't any awkward silence.
You're making tangsuyuk, according to him, and he's obviously taking the lead – expertly prepping the meat while you go chop some spices needed for the dish.
"Is this okay?" You ask, showing him your work. You hope he likes it because you're kind of under a weird pressure to be in here, helping him. Also, you're not sure if you minced the garlic right.
But Jungkook just gives you a hearty smile.
"Good girl."
And goes back to what he's doing as if he just said nothing.
Which—okay, he seemed to have unconsciously said it that now you're gaslighting yourself whether you heard him right or not. Did he really say what you think he just said? What the fucking fuck.
Thankfully, Jungkook's too busy to notice that you become a bit frozen in your position for a good ten seconds. If he truly didn't mean to say that, he needs to get those words out of his vocabulary before he sends you in a sudden cardiac arrest. It'd be the most mysterious death of humanity.
"Do you need the carrots?" You ask, raising the vegetable in your hand.
Jungkook nods and you start to peel it. He watches by your side when you begin slicing the carrot.
"Cut them into Julienne slices."
"Huh?" You look back at him. "Not the cooking jargon, Kook." You deadpan, the nickname seamlessly coming out of your mouth.
He apologizes and tells you exactly what he meant. You furrow your brows in concentration to achieve what he wants, but Jungkook just laughs beside you.
"Okay, let me just—"
He's behind you a second after that, towering over your form and circling his arms around you. Your breath hitches as Jungkook places his hand on top of yours – the one that holds the knife – and begins to guide you through slicing the carrot.
You can feel his breathing from the proximity of your position, and even though there's still distance between the both of you, it's only hairsbreadth away and frankly, the ridges of the front of his body are so prominent against your back.
Jungkook does not seem to face the same internal panic as you though, because as soon as he deems that you are staring to get it, he steps back and let you do the thing on your own.
He leans back on the countertop, crossing his arms while looking at you.
"You're not so bad at this like you claimed." He comments.
You feel your cheeks heating up, so you focus your full attention on the carrot, your hands seemingly having developed a mind of their own throughout the time. Well, at least it's doing the right job. You can only hope you don't slice through your fingers... imagine cutting them right into this very moment.
"This is a trauma response from watching too much Gordon Ramsay."
Jungkook chuckles at your joke, shaking his head.
"We're just gonna wait for another thirty minutes for the meat and the mushroom. Should we start baking? What do we do first?" He says, washing his hands first before walking towards your direction.
You take your phone out from your pocket, looking at him a bit apologetically as you say "sorry" for pulling up Google. For the record, you haven't memorized shit and this is your first time baking.
Jungkook shakes his head, telling you there's no need for apologies because he "can't bake for shit" himself. That makes you feel relieved. You thought he's just good at a lot of things.
You don't encounter any trouble while mixing the dry ingredients, but when it comes to the wet ones, you think you've done something wrong. Jungkook tells you to try it. When you dip your finger into the mixture and taste it, you automatically scrunch your face.
"What, why?" Jungkook asks curiously.
"I don't think this is quite right..." You say, looking down at the mixture sadly.
"Mayve we can add more vanilla...?" He takes the bottle with him, ready to pour some into the bowl.
You pout. "But it says one teaspoon and we already put one teaspoon."
"What do you want to do?"
"I don't know... give up?"
Jungkook chuckles as he says your name.
You sigh. "Okay, maybe we'll try some that."
You do as you say, and as you taste it again, you're delighted to notice the elevated flavor. Mindlessly dipping your finger again into the bowl, you offer it to Jungkook to try.
The very act just sinks into your head when he leans down to suck it off your finger.
It happened quick, not at all sensual and slow like the movies make it out to be, but you feel your heart rate picking up at the feel after-effect of Jungkook's hot tongue touching your skin. But as you look at him, his eyebrows are furrowed, assessing the taste, not at all in a trance by what just happened.
"Oh, definitely better." He comments, as if he didn't just... suck your finger?
... Which you offered.
That he took willingly.
You turn away from him and pretend to busy yourself with the electric mixer, fumbling with the paddle.
"Are you cooking the tangsuyuk yet?" You ask, changing the subject. Jungkook is completely unaware of the current chaos in your head, walking towards the refrigerator to take out the pork he marinated earlier and the bowl of mushrooms.
"Just tell me if you need help." He tells you, touching the small of your back as he passes by you to get to the stove.
You feel your cheeks heating at the touch, moving aside to let him start frying the meat with the batter he's busied himself with awhile ago.
"Shit!" You say, surprised at the sudden whir of the machine. Jungkook quickly looks at you. You laugh and give him a thumbs up. "I'm fine here!"
You both work together on your own thing, and when you let the dough to rest, Jungkook, at the same time, finishes frying the meat of the tangsuyuk. You don't want to feel useless while you don't have anything to work on, so you peer over what Jungkook is doing and ask him if you there's anything he needs.
"Do you want to make the sauce?" Jungkook asks you. You scrunch your nose and hesitantly nod. He seems to notice your uncertainty and chuckles. "I'll teach you."
"Okay, but don't blame me if it tastes like shit later, okay?" You warn but he just shrugs and laugh, telling you that he'll talk you through the process and there's no need to be nervous. You can just experiment with it a little, he says.
You've watched a lot of Hell's Kitchen episodes that you have this silly, unrealistic expectation on what goes on in kitchens, but thankfully, Jungkook isn't like Gordon Ramsay at all and is so unbelievably gentle in teaching you even when you almost spilled soy sauce on the countertop and put too much vinegar than needed. He shrugs your worries off by fixing the thing, thankful that when he offers you the ladle to taste the sauce from it, it's more than decent.
While Jungkook prepares the tangsuyuk for your dinner, you take the time to form your cookie dough into small circles, leaving it in the oven to bake while you follow Jungkook into the living room and start eating the food that you cooked – or he cooked.
Jungkook teases you that you lied about not being good at cooking, but you have to remind him you didn't do shit and only the bare minimum. He looks like he's not convinced.
By the time that you're finished with your dinner, the oven's timer went off. Jungkook insists that he wash the dishes even though you feel like you should be the one doing it, but he tells you to check your cookies in the oven and so you did.
You're not expecting anything, but it will feel really good if it tastes at least okay.
Crossed fingers, your mind says as you take out the sheet pan.
First impression: it looks okay to the eye. Like real cookies.
But soon, your parade is rained on when you try to bite into the cookie.
It looks like real cookie, all right, but apparently doesn't taste like one.
Your face contorts into a frown as soon as you bite down into it a second time.
Okay, that's it. Put them in the tupperware as soon as possible, you thought. So, you do just that, placing all of the pieces into the plastic box and securing them away.
From where you were, you can hear Jungkook shutting the water off on the sink, his footsteps coming near you. Once he gets close, he peers down at what you're doing. Intrigued, he asks for one.
"No." you shake your head. The cookies are to be gatekept not because it's too good but because it should not be consumed at all. Jesus. You just ate Jungkook's tangsuyuk and it tasted exactly like the ones you've eaten from restaurants; it'd be such an embarrassing contrast to your own work.
"Don't be stingy," Jungkook playfully says, already making a move to reach for the cookies in your hands.
You hide the tupperware behind your back and stop him with your other free hand.
"Don't come closer. These cookies are not for consumption. Go away."
But he just arches a brow, walking a few steps forward.
"Jungkook!" You whine. "They don't taste good, and I'm embarrassed by them."
"Just one bite," Jungkook chuckles at you, not understanding your mortification. "Come on, __."
But you're stubborn and you won't let him have any of it even if he tries hard.
Jungkook is just as determined though, as he threatens to get closer and closer to you.
You squeaked out his name when he takes a hold of the tupperware but thankfully, you're quick on your reflex and able to take it back.
The whole thing prompts you to burst into laughter as you run around the island of his kitchen, giggling at the silliness of it all.
Your efforts to get away from him eventually go to waste as he managed to get ahold of your waist with his one arm, the other not missing the beat to steal the cookies from you.
He's firm over his hold, lifting you up while laughing against your head as you try to wriggle away.
"Let me have one bite, __," He says, and with his one arm, sits you on the countertop, not letting you go just yet even when you're fully sat.
You try to snatch the plastic from him but he's much quicker this time. When he opens it, you have no choice but to cover your face in embarrassment.
"I told you it's bad." You say, pouting at him, noting the expression on his face as he chews on the cookies that tells you it definitely does not taste good.
"You're a first timer." Jungkook just says, putting down the tupperware.
"Don't try to make me feel better." You frown even more.
"I'm not! I'm just pointing out that this is the first time you tried so of course it's not gonna be perfect right away?" He offers, some sort of comfort, maybe?
But your shoulders deflate because he's right.
Still.
Jungkook must have noticed your mood and tries to cheer you up one more time.
"Come on, you still made a really good tangsuyuk."
That makes you chuckle, unconsciously kicking his knee slightly making him let out an ingenuine, "Ow!"
You don't notice one of the straps of your spaghetti top falling off until Jungkook fixes it for you in the middle of your shared laughter.
"Thanks." You smile at him, mindlessly touching the strap, keeping it in place.
Jungkook hums as he helps you jump out of the kitchen counter.
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The night ended with him walking you to your unit again, a rather silly thing he keeps on insisting to do. It's hard to put a name on it, but there's a certain feeling in your chest when you went out of Jungkook's apartment.
A feeling that lingers its way through when you receive a text from him after you come out of the shower that night.
Jungkook (Unit 446) [11:05pm]: good night chef
You fight off the smile that forces its way into your lips as you type out a reply.
You [11:06pm]: good night :)))))
Jungkook (Unit 446) [11:06pm]: i thought u already slept
You [11:07pm]: at 11oclock??? what do u think am i a grandma
Jungkook (Unit 446) [11:08pm]: fair Jungkook (Unit 446) [11:08pm]: but i had fun earlier. we should do it again sometime
You lie on your back, can't help yourself from letting a small giggle.
You [11:09pm]: jungkook-a You [11:09pm]: just tell me u wanna be with me??
You meant that as a joke, obviously. Just like how he joked about you one time over lunch about wanting to see him every day when you brought up the topic of not seeing him come out of his apartment. You did not mean anything by it other than friendly banter.
Jungkook (Unit 446) [11:10pm]: 🤔 Jungkook (Unit 446) [11:08pm]: that can be arranged. you can be my personal sous chef and I'll build us a restaurant
You [11:11pm]: sweet
Jungkook (Unit 446) [11:11pm]: you havent seen all, baby
Your lips part.
Okay...
Your relationship is absolutely platonic at best. But you can't help but think that he gets a little flirty at times... like the few moments in his kitchen earlier. Is it bad that you're thinking way too much about that specific memory of him licking your finger without thought? Of his strong arm effortlessly carrying you against his rigid body and putting you on the countertop, almost manhandling you? Is it bad you can't get the memory of him fixing your top out of your head?
His use of nickname ticks a little light at the back of your head, and you decide to poke the nest a little.
You [11:12pm]: really? what r u wearing right now
Just a little jokey-joke between friends and nothing more.
You don't even expect a reply to that, but your phone dings a second after, and when you open your message thread again, your jaw parts wider this time.
It's a picture of Jungkook lying his bed, his face cut off from the frame. But you know it's him from the arm that peeks out, his tattoos a familiar sight by now. The photo is taken at a low angle, just enough for you to see the sleeveless shirt he's sporting and the strings of his grey shorts.
You [11:14pm]: i meant that as a joke
Jungkook (Unit 446) [11:14pm]: 🥴
You do not know what he meant by that. You look for a picture to reply with, and the HAHA reaction is expected the moment you pressed send.
You [11:15pm]: stripper patrick says good night
Laughing silently at the meme you sent him which was Patrick from Spongebob wearing a pair of black fishnet tights and boots, you wait as three dots appear on Jungkook's line.
Jungkook (Unit 446) [11:15pm]: you're a minx
You chuckle, reacting to his message with an emoji and turn off your phone, almost throwing it on your nightstand and scrambling to bury your face in your pillow to let out a sound of a weird sob, but you're smiling your face off and your cheeks feel way too hot.
The truth of the matter is that you ended the conversation because you're afraid of where it's going.
Turning around, you lay on your back and stare at your ceiling, calming the beat of your heart and forcing your eyes to shut close.
But the picture Jungkook sent you keeps on popping up in your head, almost like those ads from shady websites on the internet, and when you think about it, it triggers a slur of memories that play like a picture in your head: his lips wrapped around your finger... his strong arm... his subtle touch on the small of your back...
"Ugh," you groan, slapping your hands over your face.
You furrow your brows to appear serious, thinking that it'll make you think of something serious as well, wrapping a blanket over your body and sighing when the technique doesn't work.
Okay, think of dogs... and puppies...but that's apparently a wrong move because now you're thinking of Jungkook with his dog.
You're obviously awful at this.
You turn on your bed once again, muffling a sound in your pillow.
But then as minutes passed, your restlessness continues to prevail and you're about to cry with the unknown frustration that sits at the back of your head.
Laying in silence for a while, your hand finds itself roaming over your body, your thumb catching your nipple through your thin top. You pinch the nub, experimental, until it turns into a pebbled rock in your touch.
You bite your bottom lip as your other hand trails down over your panties, running it around the waistband, down until you reach down, down, down to your core.
Your lips part when you feel its heat, two of your fingers starting to stroke where your nether lips were. You sigh at the sensation, squeezing at your boob and turning your head to the side, thinking about how good it feels.
Slowly, you reach down under your parties to part your lips, moaning at the wetness that welcomes you below.
You start to stroke gently with your middle finger, drawing figure eights over your core and making sure to put friction on your clit. The ministration produces more wetness in your cunt, and you spread it over for easier access inside as you start to poke into your hole.
"Oh my god," you mewled, breathing heavily against your pillow, pumping a finger into you. It's a little tight, and you remember you haven't touched yourself like this for over a few weeks now.
But god, how could you forget the feeling of it? The feeling of something going in and out of your cunt, gliding so smoothly because of the abundance of wetness all over.
"Fuck." you sigh out, lips parted, eyes closed to feel more of the sensation.
Your other hand reaches under your top to fondle with your boob, helping you stimulate yourself into that familiar feeling of great ecstasy that comes with your pussy getting touched.
It's starting to feel hot, and you can feel the beads of sweat starting to form on the side of your head even though the AC and your fan are both on. There's a zap that starts from your spine that comes with a sort of electricity coming from within, transferring that tick into your belly which prompts you to pump into your hole faster.
The sheets are a mess at this point, with your feet kicking into them as your movement picks up pace.
"Oh god," you cry out silently, muffling your sob in the comfort of your fluffy pillow.
You chase the feeling of completion, closing your eyes once more, trying to figure out how to get there.
And there's one familiar man that pops inside your head.
Jeon Jungkook.
"Oh shit," you hiss, pinching your nipple and going in and out faster.
Jungkook with his lips around your finger. Jungkook pressing his body against your back. Jungkook carrying you against his body. Jungkook's electric touch as he fixes the strap that's fallen over your naked shoulder.
You let out a pathetic moan, trying to shake away the thoughts of him.
You aren't supposed to. It feels wrong. So wrong.
Suddenly, you feel frustrated over still not reaching your climax up to this point.
You let out a heavy breath, pulling out your fingers from your pussy and from under your panties.
You don't get off. You never do – with your fingers, anyway, that is. And that's why you have a trusted toy buried deep at the back of the drawer of your nightstand, kept away for occasional uses. You'd say you need it right now, but you're too flushed and tired to take it out.
And there's also a melancholic feeling in your heart upon realizing that you just thought of Jungkook while touching yourself.
"Shit, shit, shit." You hiss, the cusses mostly dedicated to yourself.
You shake your head as you sit on the edge of your bed, your hair a bird's nest and clothes strewn over your body as per your reflection on the full-body mirror across your bed.
Sighing, you let your head down and massage your temples.
"God, what's wrong with me,"
You feel guilty... because you aren't supposed to think of a friend when you're trying to get off. You told yourself you'd stop finding Jungkook hot or cute or what-the-fuck-ever so that stupid crush can go away finally. But it feels like all your efforts – or lack, thereof – always seem to fall short.
This isn't good. You need to think straight.
A sudden loud ping catches your attention, almost startling you because it's in the middle of the night, after all. When you snap your head to the side, you see your phone with the light out.
You instantly feel a little nervous. What if it's Jungkook? There's an irrational fear in your head that he knows what you just did, but you shake the thought away, scolding yourself for getting way over your head.
Nibbling on your bottom lip, you feel scared to open your phone but then, did you really have a choice?
Slowly trudging to the direction of your phone, you pick it up from the table and turn it on.
August 18: Your cycle forecast Ovulation in 2 days. Your sex drive may just be hitting its peak🌡️ Tap for tips to make most out of it👉
"Oh fuck me." You curse, throwing your phone on the bed, feeling pissed all of the sudden.
Fucking period tracker app... and ovulation.
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PART THREE | ...
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all right reserved © awrkive, 2024. no reposts, modification, and copying allowed. if you enjoy my work/s and have the extra means, please consider supporting me on ko-fi <3
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kikokus · 8 months ago
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Lucci and Kaku: An Analysis
I haven’t done long analysis/meta/essay-style posts in a while, but after seeing a comment that amounted to “every time Lucci’s shown an interest in something that doesn’t have to do with killing, Kaku’s involved” it made me think about whether or not that's true and, more specifically, whether or not there’s been sufficient build-up to justify what happens in Chapter 1111.
So let’s explore, shall we?
First of all, basic disclaimer that I’ve been heavily into One Piece since 2008 and Water 7 has been my favorite arc since the first time I read it that summer. Kaku, in turn, has always been one of my top characters in the entire series for various reasons…but this isn’t about him (at least, not entirely), so all of that is just to say that I’ve thought about these characters a lot over the years.
And I think what always struck me about them is that not only are they so fundamentally different, but that realistically Lucci should not tolerate Kaku at all. He’s pretty much everything Lucci’s not, and they’re more-or-less a perfect example of the ‘someone will die…of fun!’ meme in a lot of ways (and honestly it’s what I think of every time I see this card, but I digress):
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At the same time, what happened in the latest chapter didn’t surprise me, because there’s been hints all along, and I’ve personally been waiting years for it to pay off…even though part of me thought it never would, or at least not in the way it did!
Still, how did we get here?
But First, A Bit About 相棒
So. Why is the fact that Lucci calls Kaku his “相棒” (aibou) so significant? Mostly because of the…individualistic meaning of the word. It literally translates to ‘partner’, but not in a romantic/life-partner way (not to say that it has never been used like that, but it’s not the inherent meaning of the word).
Unlike words such as 友人 (yuujin), 友達 (tomodachi), and of course, with Luffy, 仲間 (nakama), aibou generally only refers to one person. You can have many friends, teammates, crew members…but only one aibou. So by calling Kaku that, Lucci’s already placing him on a different level to anyone else in CP9 or CP0 and acknowledging openly that Kaku’s important enough to him to have earned that distinction.
Which is why a lot of us were very excited about it, since this is not a common occurrence where Lucci’s concerned.
That aside, let’s get to the actual canon content.
Water 7
Obviously at the beginning we find out they both work at the shipyard, but that in and of itself isn’t entirely significant…until you consider that, since Kalifa is pretty much with Iceburg all the time and Blueno’s running the bar, the two of them are working in much closer proximity to each other than to the other CP9 members in the city. 
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The first real indication we get regarding their comfort level with each other comes in chapter 327 when Kaku gets back from examining the Merry and goes to sit down to explain what he’s discovered. Paulie’s the closest to him, but he actually ends up stepping past both him and Lucci in order to sit directly beside Lucci on the same level.
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It’s quite a while before we see the two of them alone again, and it doesn’t happen until chapter 339 when they’re speaking with Robin. Of course at the time we’re not supposed to know it’s them, but there’s really nobody else it can be since this is happening at the exact same time that Blueno’s talking with Franky and Kokoro at the bar. So, as will become fairly common, the two of them are again acting as a unit of their own within the larger group.
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And then, of course, we get the infiltration of the mansion prior to The Big Reveal (which I’ve spoken about before because for me it’s still the single greatest reveal in the entire manga because of how carefully crafted it is, right down to Kaku’s limited dialogue in this section being completely devoid of his usual speech quirks in the original Japanese text). Once again, Blueno and Kalifa are doing their own things while these two are working together.
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This panel has always been interesting to me because immediately prior to this Lucci says he can’t let Paulie live, and then he decides to just restrain him instead. In Luffy’s case it makes sense because they gave their word to Robin not to harm the Strawhats, but he has absolutely no reason to spare Paulie, and the little lines of shock/surprise beside Kaku imply that he hadn’t expected Lucci to do that, either. The ‘why’ is still unclear, but it’s interesting nonetheless, and it’s also…noteworthy that it’s the only thing Lucci asks Kaku to do. All of the actual damage Paulie takes comes from Lucci and he never asks for or expects Kaku to harm him.
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I never connected these two panels before but it’s obviously very deliberate to have Lucci telling Iceburg that feeling emotions is a sign of humanity followed immediately by Kaku…demonstrating exactly that and thanking Iceburg. It’s important to establish that part of Kaku’s character, but keep in mind Lucci’s lack of a reaction here because it’ll come back later.
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Again, very tiny moment, but there’s a lot of examples of Lucci deferring to Kaku or letting him take the lead without any hesitation, and I like this because Kaku’s noticed something that Lucci hasn’t and Lucci just goes with it immediately.
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I’d forgotten about this but Kaku’s also the one that decides to take Usopp with them, first by recognizing him as one of the Strawhats and then going through with it even after finding out he doesn’t consider himself a part of them anymore. And Lucci just…stands back and lets him give out orders to the others while doing so.
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Okay so this is what I was referencing earlier. Kaku shows actual emotions with Iceburg and Lucci’s silent, but the moment Kalifa gets even slightly happy about completing the mission he’s berating her instantly. Kaku’s expression here is interesting too because he looks absolutely haunted and it’s very telling.
And also another visual representation of Lucci and Kaku being equal to/on the same level as each other.
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I didn’t include the panel but Kaku was ‘sleeping’ when Corgi was giving them all of the information about Nero while Lucci was (seemingly) wide awake, and yet Lucci has no idea who he is and relies on Kaku to have all the information. Which he does.
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Kaku being the one to take charge again and direct the others even though Lucci’s standing right there. They do this more than I’d realized at first, especially since Lucci always seems to be looked at as the unofficial ‘leader’ of CP9.
Enies Lobby
We’ve made it to Enies Lobby, which is the first glimpse we get of these two interacting with the full CP9 group outside of any sort of ‘mission’ environment.
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Mostly it entails Lucci being more combative (especially with Jabra) and Kaku being more annoyed, but again I can’t really imagine anyone else taking this tone with Lucci and getting away with it while Kaku does it fairly often and Lucci never retorts or gets angry with him.
And while Kaku’s not immune to taking Jabra’s bait in the right circumstances, his typical tendency is to de-escalate situations if he can and here he’s refusing to engage despite being deliberately called out…and Lucci, without being asked, immediately takes his side and defends his choice.
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This is practically the next panel and while both Lucci and Jabra are kind of equally at fault for this little display, Kaku only berates Jabra for it while Kalifa’s directing her comments at both of them.
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Now that I’m actually looking for these sorts of things it’s becoming more obvious, but again we have Lucci and Kaku in an equal position to each other at the front of CP9.
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This isn’t just to Kaku since Kalifa’s there as well, but Lucci’s still encouraging them to eat the fruits and I have to believe it’s coming from a place of good faith because he’d know whether or not being able to swim is that big an issue in their profession. I also want to note that Kaku echoes Lucci’s ‘it’ll be fun’ line when he actually does eat his fruit, so obviously that resonated with him.
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I’ve put these two together because they both highlight the same thing, that being in both of these sequences we get almost all of CP9 giving out their individual thoughts/comments on what’s happening but Kaku’s statement both times is a direct reply to what Lucci says, so again the two of them are paired off in a way that doesn’t include anyone else there. 
The only other thing of note in this section is that while Robin’s talking about what happened during the Buster Call on Ohara, Kaku and Lucci are the only CP9 members to kind of…break formation and actually look at her while she’s speaking, which is interesting.
And for the rest of Enies Lobby they aren’t together so there’s not too much more to say here other than Kaku of course being the one to have the actual key to Robin’s cuffs, but it’s never made explicit who came up with that plan or handed out the keys so…if I ever actually do the thing and write a full analysis of Kaku’s character we can talk about it then Lark you’ve been saying you’ll do this for years IF I EVER--
Interlude - CP9’s Independent Report
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Besides the fact that this is still one of my favorite cover stories, there’s a couple of noteworthy things here, the first of which is that Kaku again is taking the lead. Even though he’s the only other CP9 member other than Lucci to be injured badly enough that he can’t walk on his own, he’s still the one directing them where to go.
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Other than that, I love seeing all of them just…interacting like friends and being very relaxed and casual, and pretty much every panel where Kaku and Lucci are together they’re directly beside each other so I’ve included a bunch of those here.
Dressrosa & Egghead
The next time we see Lucci and Kaku is at the end of Dressrosa, where they’ve been promoted to CP0 Oda can we please get some explanation of how this happened and let me tell you, I remember this vividly because the spoilers at the time just said that Lucci was talking to ‘someone’ and when the raws came out you can bet I went right to the dialogue to see if it was Kaku because his way of speaking is so telling.
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But even in this little scene, we can see they’re having an equal conversation and there’s a major difference between how Lucci’s speaking with Kaku and how he addresses Spandam mere seconds later.
After this we have the Reverie/Levely/what-even-is-this-thing-called arc where they get all of a single panel together and while it’s the first time we actually ‘see’ Kaku after the time-skip, nothing really interesting regarding their relationship happens, so let’s move on to…
The end of the colored manga! And Egghead.
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We start with a very familiar situation: Lucci asking Kaku what’s going on, and while Kaku this entire arc seems more outwardly annoyed with Lucci than he ever was in the past (which is never really explained but then again, Lucci spends a lot of the arc doing things he’s specifically been told not to do, so maybe it’s understandable…), he still has all the information and relays it.
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Though Kaku’s also much more comfortable letting his real personality show despite them being on a mission while before he was always completely serious after the Water 7 reveal, especially around Lucci. It came through with Zoro and Jabra but during the cover story he’s smiling and laughing a lot with Lucci right there so it makes sense he’d be more willing to let his guard down even ‘on the job’ by now.
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So here’s the first real instance of Lucci showing concern for Kaku, something which escalates pretty quickly throughout the arc. It’s subtle, and though he’s framing it as a suggestion to Stussy, if he didn’t care at all he wouldn’t have said anything. 
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At this point it’s fairly obvious that Lucci and Kaku don’t really have any authority difference between them and Kaku spends a lot of time in this chapter especially telling Lucci to Not Do The Thing. Anyone that’s ever lived with a cat knows how well this works.
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I’ve always found this bit of dialogue particularly interesting because Kaku’s very openly…praising Sentomaru for choosing his loyalty to Vegapunk over assisting the government, and there’s no way Lucci doesn’t hear him say this but he doesn’t say anything in return. There’s no real evidence that Lucci knows about Kaku willingly giving up the key to Zoro or how conflicted he was about Paulie and everyone else, but this seems to imply that at the very least, even if he doesn’t share those sentiments, he wouldn’t think less of Kaku because of it.
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Putting these two together since they’re in the same scene but at this point it’s not even subtle concern anymore, Lucci’s genuinely worried for Kaku and you can tell this caught him off-guard.
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Kaku’s the first one to suggest working together but Lucci immediately backs him up and goes with the idea. It’s logical in the sense that it’ll give them the biggest chance to survive, but willingly working with pirates isn’t exactly the sort of thing that Lucci, especially in the past, would have so easily done regardless of the situation.
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So at this point it’s becoming clear that this whole 4-v-2 section is supposed to be the most…light-hearted thing going on right now and a lot of it is played to be comedic, including Lucci’s inability to lie, but yet again there’s almost nobody else that could get away with scolding him the way Kaku’s doing here.
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…And then we skip ahead a day and things happen that I really hope get explained at some point because they seem important, but while Lucci’s never going to have impeccable bedside manner, he’s very concerned with getting Kaku to rest and while Kaku’s trying to justify what happened Lucci really doesn’t seem to care about that. It’s a big departure from him being willing to write off anyone he deems ‘too weak’ and it’s a nice character moment.
I’d mentioned on my liveblog that some of the things Lucci was doing after this point were confusing, but if you look at them through the lens of him wanting to protect Kaku, it makes a lot more sense. Yes, he’s deliberately keeping him out of the loop, but Lucci I think has decided that he’s going to throw caution to the wind and act alone since if Kaku can’t prove he knew about the plan, he’s probably safer being left with the Strawhats, and if the Marines show up he should be safe anyway or so Lucci thinks…
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When this chapter came out, I’d said something about Lucci being a hypocrite considering what the rest of CP9 did for him when they could have easily just left him at Enies Lobby, but given what happens almost directly after and likely what he’s trying to do with this entire fight, these words feel even less genuine…
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And that brings us to this. The moment that I’ve been thinking about for almost an entire week now. The moment that, looking back at…oh, wow…almost 3000 words of analysis maybe shouldn’t be as surprising as it was for most of us, but it does feel like the payoff for a long, long buildup that’s taken nearly twenty years to reach. Because really, there’s no other way to describe them other than ‘partners’, and probably hasn’t been for a long time…and I’m so glad that Lucci acknowledged it.
To summarize, I think what surprised me most about re-visiting all of this is how much the manga has framed them as equals since the beginning even though it was never explicitly stated between the characters themselves. Lucci’s always been far more lenient with Kaku than with anyone else, and Kaku in turn has never had any fear of Lucci even if he wasn’t really expressing his true self with him for a long time.
The cover story being the turning point makes perfect sense, and the progression throughout Egghead of Lucci being more outwardly willing to show his concern and Kaku not hiding his emotions at all seems like a natural progression of their relationship and their level of comfort around each other.
And the fact that Oda is never really…hitting us over the head with any of it until that final moment when Lucci says everything so plainly because Kaku’s life is the most important thing to him even when faced with a literal monster… It’s so effective. 
I don’t know where we go from here. To be honest, I’m kind of scared of where we go from here. But regardless of the outcome, I hope this little essay has been at the very least interesting and perhaps allowed you to look at these two in a different light.
Thanks for reading.
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7ndipity · 1 year ago
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“Like Crazy”
Jimin x Idol Reader
Summary: Jimin asks you to fill in as his dance partner for a Like Crazy performance
Warnings: not proofread
A/N: Thanks to the lovely anon who requested this! I hope you like it!
Masterlist
Requests are open
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“Ok, let's take five and then we’ll go again!” The choreographer called.
Gratefully, you slumped down to the floor, letting your head rest against the wall as you took a few deep breaths. Comebacks were always exhausting, but this new choreo you’d been working on was really kicking your butt.
Letting your eyes fall shut, you made a mental note to try and make the next single be something slower, only to be jolted out of your train of thought by the sound of your phone.
Quickly digging it out of your bag, you couldn’t help the small grin that crept across your face as you read the caller ID. “💖Chimmy💖”
“Hey you.” You answered.
“Hey, uh, I have a huge favor to ask, and I need you to not hate me.” Jimin said quickly, sounding stressed.
“I would never hate you.” You replied.
“Would you be my dance partner?”
“What?” You blinked.
“Jinsol’s sick, and we need someone to fill in for this weekend's performance.” He explained. “I know it’s short notice, and you’re doing promotions right now too, but you’re one of the only other people who already knows the choreo.”
“Would the company be okay with us doing that?” You asked. Although it wasn’t a secret that you and Jimin were ‘close’, the exact status of your relationship was, and you knew that performing like this would inevitably stir up rumors.
“They said they could make it work, if you agreed.”
You considered it for a moment before speaking again. “Which days would you need me to cover?” You asked.
“Just Saturday.”
You sat up a little straighter. “Jimin… That’s Music Bank.” You said, stating the obvious.
“I know.”
“I’m also performing on Music Bank?”
“I know.” He repeated. “You can say no, it’s totally okay, I just had the thought-”
“No, I’ll do it.” You said quickly. The chance to actually perform with your boyfriend was not one you were keen on passing up, however sudden and hectic it might be.
“You will?!” He exclaimed.
“Yeah, sure.” You replied. “The managers will probably hate it, But what the hell?”
“Ah, Y/n, thank you!!” He cried through the phone. “I’ll find a way to pay you back for this, I promise!”
“You better,” You giggled at his enthusiasm. “I’m risking the wrath of army here.”
“They’ll behave, don’t worry.” He said. “I gotta go and update everyone, I’ll call you again later. Love you.”
“Love you too.” You replied, hanging up and taking another deep breath.
Well, this weekend just got more interesting…
The next two days were filled with ducking between rehearsals, wanting to make sure you had the choreo for ‘Like Crazy’ down perfectly. Jimin had taught you the main portion of the dance a couple months ago as he was getting ready for promotions, but you still had to get the hang of dancing with the group for the other sections.
Now, as you were weaving through the crowded backstage area to catch up with the rest of Jimin's team and quickly change outfits, you were beginning to feel the pre-show nerves settling in, despite having just finished your own performance.
As soon as Jimin caught sight of you, he tackled you in a tight hug.
“You did amazing out there!” He said excitedly, giving you a squeeze before releasing you.
“You watched?”
“Of course I did!” He said, cocking his head at you. “What kind of boyfriend would I be if I didn’t support my amazingly talented partner?”
Before you could come up with a retort, you were all being called to the stage. You and the others watched from the side as Jimin went out and greeted the crowd, thanking them all for coming and expressing how he hoped they would like the performance.
As the lights went down and you and the other dancers moved to your places, you heard a couple surprised shouts of your name, making you bite back a grin as you glanced back at Jimin. He shot you a quick smile and thumbs up before turning away.
As the music started, you took a deep breath, your earlier jitters quickly dissolving as you let everything else fade away, focusing only on following the others and Jimin.
When you reached the solo part of the song that was just you and Jimin, you had to bite back another smile as the two of you made eye contact as he sang, sending him a quick wink before you spun behind him, hearing the slightest waver in his voice as he fought back a laugh.
The rest of the dance went smoothly, and almost too soon, you were back in the starting position as the final notes of the song faded out, only to be immediately replaced by the crowd’s thunderous cheers.
Everyone quickly ducked off stage and headed back to the dressing rooms in flurry, you and a couple of the other dancers talking and complementing each other on the performance. After a few minutes, Jimin managed to pull you off to the side, pressing a quick, enthusiastic kiss to your lips.
“Thank you so much.” He whispered.
“You’re welcome.” You said. “Although, you know you’re gonna get in trouble for making moves on your dancers like this.”
“I can’t help it,” He whined. “You were too cute out there.”
“Do you think the fans liked it?”
“I hope so, I know I did.” He said.
“I’ve noticed.” You giggled as he tried to kiss you again, only to be interrupted by the sound of your names being called as your teams tried to find you.
He groaned. “We’d better go. Can I come over later?” He asked.
“You better, you still owe me payment for today, remember?” You teased.
“I’ll have to come up with something really good.” He grinned before slipping out the door ahead of you.
“Can’t wait.”
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hollowtakami · 9 months ago
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THE BIRD’S BOOKSHOP
BANNER ART: KADEART
Keigo Takami x GN!Reader
CONTENT: bookworm keigo x bookworm reader, pure fluff, keigo has bird mannerisms + is the cutest hopeless romantic
WORD COUNT: 447
AUTHOR NOTE: thank you so much for 100 followers!! i appreciate every single one of you, every single interaction! i loved writing this one, im thinking of making it a fluff miniseries? for now, be safe, friends! you are so loved!
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In one universe, Keigo Takami is one of Japan’s  top heroes. He’s saving lives everyday, constantly on high alert. He’s a marionette on a string, the puppeteer the HPSC - they raised him, made him into a “hero”. 
In another universe, Keigo Takami spends his days with his face in a book, sipping his favourite sweet, canned coffee. 
He adores fantasy novels, he gets lost in them for hours. Losing himself in the pages, with every turn comes with it a new discovery. Keigo is captivated by the mystique, the weird and wonderful creatures bound by ink and paper. 
He reads of unlikely heroes, pilgrims, sorcery and witchcraft, dragons and humans with wings; those are his favourite characters, he loves seeing himself in them. 
If he’s not at a locally-owned cafe, Keigo will be at the bookstore. When he’s not clocked in at the library, he’s at his second home. He spends hours scanning the shelves, reading blurbs of books he found interesting, re-shelving them with careful fingers. 
All the employees know him, they love the charming, golden bird that always walks in with a smile and stars in his eyes. 
He’s tried local book clubs, but found that they thought his incessant rambling - or, chirping - about his latest reads to be rather irritating. 
At times, Keigo felt erroneous, a dusty, tattered thing among a freshly-printed paperback. 
That was until he wandered again into the bookshop, and saw you sauntering around the fantasy section - his place in the bookstore. 
He didn’t feel territorial, as a bird of his stature would. Instead, Keigo Takami found himself besotted by the stranger gazing at the spine of one of his favourite novels. 
He has to fight down an excited chirp as he sees your hands fold over the book, you slip it out and read over the blurb. Though, his wings flap audibly and catch your attention, the soft breeze tickling your face. 
You look over and smile at the sheepish bird in front of you, an awkward smile plastered on his face, redder than his wings. 
“Sorry-! Uh, I couldn’t help but notice you’d picked up some of my favourites!” 
You can hear the excitement in the bird’s voice, and feel those emotions repeated in the beating of your heart. 
You beam, “Yeah! They’re one of my favourite authors, actually,” 
The bookstore staff watched as you enamoured over each other, discussing your beloved fantasy novels; the best parts of ongoing series, plot twists and your favourite characters. 
They smiled. 
Keigo Takami had finally found someone who shared his love for the world within pages of a book. Little did he know that you’d been searching for the exact same thing. 
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neil-gaiman · 1 year ago
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Evening Mr Gaiman,
This is my beloved copy of Good Omens that i happened upon for £8.99 in a waterstones in the midlands in 2019 shortly after the release of the good omens show. I absolutely loved the show so was in search of a copy of the book to read and found a table of these exact waterstones exclusive editions in the fantasy section of my local waterstones and was very excited to find this one in middle of them all. It was the only one of its kind and has a somewhat battered signed first edition sticker on the front. I’ve had this book proudly displayed on my shelf for the past few years but after doing some research i can’t seem to find any other signed first editions of this copy of the book online or for sale? So i was just wondering did you sign many? This copy of the Good Omens book is one of my absolute prized possessions I’ve been so proud of it even before I found out that it was fairly uncommon so I just thought I’d ask (also if anyone on tumblr has this particular signed first edition copy of good omens let me know i’ve never seen another one before!!)
P.S. If you talk to David Tennant anytime in the near future it would be lovely if you could let him know that his performance of Hamlet absolutely saved my English Literature exam today as I mistakenly revised for the complete wrong part of the exam and by heavily referring to his performance i think i may have picked up hopefully enough marks to pass
I don’t remember! I’m sorry. I don’t think I signed a lot of them though.
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damianbugs · 2 years ago
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in remembrance of that anon that i tragically lost, here are some recs for THE most underutilised duo in the batfam. i could write ridiculously long essays about the tragedy of these two characters, and how they could become something great, if dc would get a grip a let tim grow up, preferably in the next decade. no complaints about damian. he is perfect.
this is also a cry for HELP. PLEASE write more big brother tim fics i am literally on the verge of collapsing as i ask. he is so unprepared but well meaning big brother so let him carry out his duty towards damian and duke PLEASE.
right then, anyways:
TIM AND DAMIAN FIC RECS ON AO3
miles and miles (in their shoes) by JUBE514
Where is Damian? Why can’t he see anything clearly? Where is the little brat? Damian had been by him in the cave when everything had exploded, they had been arguing like always when the two of them had gotten the punishment to go clean the trophy room, stop yelling at each other, stop being at each other's throat for two minutes and go clean the goddamn trophy room-
They had been cleaning, got into another knock out drag out argument, and it had come so close to blows and they had been screaming more than cleaning and-
The stupid fucking shoe, in the magical section- exploded out-
--
Tim and Damian switch bodies, the two of them realize exactly why the other does the things they do.
MY NOTES: i know body swap aus can be a little worrying, but this is a phenomenal fic on not just the complicated relationship between tim and damian, but also their own individual struggles and how that brings them closer together in an unspoken yet profound way. a must read if you appreciate the characters in their entirety.
Biphasic Reaction by renecdote
People may have allergic reactions all the time and be fine, but they can also die from them. He has a flash of sudden, morbid curiosity about what the exact statistics for fatal allergic reactions are.
MY NOTES: secretly protective big brother tim u mean the world to me. they are so fun in this, even with the medical emergency occurring alongside the sillies.
i only sink deeper (the deeper i think) by call_me_steve
Drake clicks his tongue and tilts his head off to the side. “This really isn’t as fun as I thought it would be.”
Oh, really? Damian starts furiously finger spelling, just to be annoying. You know, I thought the floating platforms would be of the utmost excitement.
“I caught a solid half of that and I think you’re making fun of me.” Drake goes to shift before remembering that he can’t - his face beneath his domino contorts into something unpleasant. “My legs are falling asleep, dude.”
You move, signs Damian, for real this time, and I go under.
“You talk,” Drake shoots back. “And I go under."
MY NOTES: it wouldn't be a real saki fic rec post without at least one kidnapped and almost dying in order to escape fic. i think about the conversation about love and danger at least once a week at random intervals and do not know how to be normal about it. at all.
The Wound Begins to Bleed by audreycritter
Now that Tim’s moved back to the manor, he just wants a few afternoons a week without Damian around.
Funny how getting that was the catalyst for him becoming a better big brother.
MY NOTES: okay so maybe i've read this a billion times and maybe it's my favourite tim and damian fic ever to exist but isn't that just proof you need to read it too? such a real fic. so personal. can't think of anything else but u must read it
picture perfect memories by Fandom_Trash224
“I… require assistance with something. I believe you are best-suited for it.”
Tim raises an eyebrow, but motions for the younger boy to enter his room. As Damian does, he slowly closes the door behind him, and Tim notices a small piece of what Tim assumes to be paper in Damian’s hand. Then, he realizes it’s not just a piece of paper: it’s a photo.
Damian approaches Tim, holding out the photo at arm’s length once he’s close enough to do so, saying, “I would like you to explain this photo to me.”
Tim glances down at it, and to both his surprise and mild horror, he recognizes the photo.
MY NOTES: oh... oh. Oh i am on the ground dead forever. damian and tim bonding over the shared fact that they got a version of bruce they'll never, ever meet. finding a common ground in grieving something they never had. oh.... how marvelous.
The Study of Birds by MaskoftheRay
Tim and Damian have hated one another since the day that the youngest Wayne arrived in Gotham City. A few years later, that hatred has cooled into a mutual disdain and somewhat-wary tolerance. If necessary, they can even work together— though neither likes to. Then Tim discovers that Damian enjoys bird-watching too.
Or: sometimes the difficult things are the most rewarding.
MY NOTES: truly something so special about stories where tim and damian find comfort and something to cherish in animals. a middle ground born from compassion and empathy perhaps. so sweet.
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