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cannedapricot · 2 years ago

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the deal. || ldh

in which you never wanted to ask your stupid neighbor for help in chasing your dream man - but desperate times call for desperate measures - even if that meant giving lee donghyuck the satisfaction of parking his car in your spot.

word count: 3.5k

genre, warnings: fluff at the end, smidge of angst, slice of life, neighbor!au, high school!au, one sided enemies to lovers, mistaking admiration for love, very romcom movie there's a kiss in the rain scene somewhere in here, mark lee is in the same grade as the 00s for plot purposes, underage drinking, profanities

bgm: hits different by taylor swift, can i call you tonight? by dayglow, disaster by conan gray, i like me better by lauv, kiss goodnight by i dont know how but they found me

a/n: i read better than the movies and the whole time i was thinking "you know who this trope would look good on? hyuck." and thus this was birthed. there's a another neighbor!au in my drafts but the brainrot has taken over i'm afraid.

A proud grin, the tinkling of his keys, an annoying strut. These were all the qualities Lee Donghyuck sported in this very moment as he climbs out of his car. Perfectly parallel parked in the spot outside your house.

If only you were rich. You'd run your stupid neighbor over in a heartbeat then pay the bail to get out of jail. Instead, you wear a scowl reserved especially for the boy, click your tongue, and park a good five minute walk away.

Technically, the parking spot was between your house and the Lees next door. But technically, the spot was 60% on your side, and 40% on theirs. So technically, shouldn't that spot be yours? Why was your shit head of a neighbor adamantly trying to feud with you?

The five minute walk, lovingly dubbed the "walk of shame" by both you and your sworn enemy, would be a lovely three minute walk home - if not for the Kims on the corner who loved starting conversations with whoever passed by. On a good day, you would get away with two minutes of conversation ("Oh sorry Mrs. Kim, I have an assignment I just must get to."). Other days? You weren't so lucky.

"Four minutes? I think that might be a new record." Donghyuck gloats, leaning against his car.

"You were timing me?" You glare at his casual demeanor, wondering how he could possibly be so insufferable.

"Well, I have to know what I'm up against."

You snort, passing by the boy waving his keys around like a trophy, making sure your middle finger was up and in sight.

"Jealousy is a disease, babe." He sings as you slam the door shut behind you.

He really was insufferable.

You should've known.

When you agreed to go to Liu Yangyang's party on the condition that someone drive you, you would've thought he would send someone like Jaemin or Jeno - the duo that always seemed to be the assigned sober drivers. Looking back, you were naïve.

You should've known he'd send your neighbor.

Thus, leads you to the present. Lee Donghyuck in your kitchen, chatting up your mother while you hurriedly try to find your jacket before said mother gets any more charmed by the kid next door.

Truth be told, you were close to not going to the party at all. But then you caught wind that he'd be there and it'd be silly not to grab hold of any chance you could have to impress him.

Donghyuck watches you move around out of the corner of his eye and when you started to move towards the door, he knew you were ready. But he'd spend extra long bidding your mom farewell, just so you'd wait a few minutes longer. He always liked keeping you waiting.

"I never took you for a house partier." Donghyuck comments when the two of you enter his car. "Stop checking yourself out in the mirror, you look the same as always."

You flip the sun visor back up with a scoff. What's wrong with making sure your hair was laying the way you wanted it?

"I never thought you'd agree to drive me to a house party."

"What can I say? I love giving back to the community."

It was a mystery to you how Donghyuck was so beloved around both the town and school. He was sarcastic, petty, and most importantly, constantly went against you. Perhaps everyone was blinded by his attractiveness? He did have a pretty face.

"I get that my face is attractive, but you don't have to look so hard. I think you're staring holes into my lovely cheek."

Correction, he had a pretty face when his mouth was shut.

It was loud, you could feel the bass pumping through your body. Drunk teenagers littered the floor of Yangyang's suburban house, bouncing to the beat and having the time of their lives. Swerving through the crowd of bodies, you picked up on bits of gossip you were sure you weren't supposed to hear. But by the end of the night, you were sure you would've forgotten about whatever scandal Shotaro from biology got into anyway.

Somehow still together, you and your neighbor find the host mixing unidentifiable liquids together in a red solo cup on the kitchen counter.

"Yang, is that poison or alcohol?"

"How dare you, it's called "a good time.""

He offers you the cup, which you turn down. You know how drunk Yangyang likes to get at his parties. Therefore, you know that one sip of whatever was in that cup could probably send you to ER. And you refused to go to ER without at least getting one glance of your dream man.

A quick scan of the room told you that he wasn't here, at least, not within your radius.

"No alcohol for me tonight. I have to drive this one back."

You raised an eyebrow as Donghyuck declines Yangyang's "special blend".

"How responsible." You tease.

"Only because you're here. I don't want you dying at my hands." He counters, leaning back and meeting your gaze, smirk on his lips. "How would I ever face your mother again?"

"Yo, Haechan, dude, you finally made it." A familiar voice sounds.

Enter, Mark Lee. Star athlete, every teacher's favorite student, adorably awkward, and your crush of two months. You swore he had this glow around him that made everything he does so endearing, even when he accidentally sent a basketball flying to your head once.

"Oh, hey Y/N. Didn't know you were coming as well."

"Yeah! I came with Donghyuck! Well, not with him but he was my ride here and will be my ride home so-"

You really had to do something about your nervous rambling in front of Mark.

Mark stayed for a small conversation with your little group before someone hurled on Yangyang's bathroom tiles, not making it to the toilet in time. The host (grumbling about how he just cleaned it yesterday) went to sort it out, your crush in tow.

You stare fondly at his back disappearing into the crowd before you feel a hot breath on your neck.

"No way. You like Mark Lee."

The car ride home was painful for you. Despite your attempts to bargain with him the whole party so he would shut up, the boy behind the wheel spends the whole ten minute drive teasing you like an elementary schooler instead. The song about kissing in a tree involved.

"What is it about him that you like?" Donghyuck asks, an amused glint in his eyes.

"Why? So you can hold it against me for the rest of my life?"

"Wow, I'm offended. Who do you take me for? I would never."

You raise an unbelieving eyebrow at him, only to be met by his side profile in the moonlight. The silver light beams against his features and you only just realize the constellation of stars on his cheek. The light at the intersection flashes red and the car smooths to a stop, Donghyuck turns to look at you, a small smile on his lips.

Shit, isn't this kind of intimate?

"Fuck off." You cough out, swiveling your head to look out the window instead. "Eyes on the road, Lee."

"I'm a Lee, but not the Lee you want." He exclaims, following it with an overly dramatic sob.

Keeping a steady stare out the window, you try to calm your reeling mind. Eyes on the prize, Y/N.

The prize being Mark Lee, of course.

Speaking of which.

"Donghyuck, you're friends with Mark right?"

"Depends. Are you going to ask me to help you get with him?"

You sit up in your seat and make your best possible attempt at puppy dog eyes, "please? I wouldn't ask if I didn't have a choice."

It was true, begging Donghyuck was the last thing you ever wanted to do. But you weren't getting anywhere by yourself and they were friends so surely that could help your case? At least he could tell you what type of person Mark liked? Desperate times call for desperate measures.

Your neighbor goes silent, presumably thinking about this suggestion. "What would I get in return though?"

Of course he wasn't just going to help you for nothing. So you rack your brains for something you'd be willing to exchange.

The car turns into your familiar neighborhood, passing Mrs Kim's house. And as the car pulls into the parking spot in front of your house, you spill out, "I'll give you the parking spot."

Donghyuck's eyebrows go up at this suggestion and his signature smirk makes it's way back onto his face. He leans his arm against the back of your seat and you instinctively lean back, fighting the urge to wipe that stupid grin off him.

"You're willing to take the "walk of shame" everyday for him?"

You click your tongue, "the parking space. Take it or leave it."

He leans back, mouth still curved up. The distance lets you release a breath you didn't know you were holding.

"You make a compelling argument."

"Well?"

"Deal."

You give him a nod, moving to exit the car and crawl back into the comfortable sheets of your bed, but Donghyuck's hand on your arm stops you. In confusion, you look back at him.

"I'm not fake dating you though."

"Hyuck, this isn't "To All the Boys I've Loved Before". I would rather die than fake date you."

The corners of his lips quirk up into a smile - not a smirk - at his nickname. "Hyuck?"

"I'm going home."

True to his word, for the next couple of weeks Donghyuck actively played a part in nudging you and Mark together. However, as much as he tried to create chances for you and your crush to be alone, your habit of nervous rambling when making conversation didn't help at all. It's not your fault Mark has the prettiest eyes you've ever seen. Though, somewhere in the back of your mind lingers a mischievous pair that glimmered the same way stars twinkled that night he drove you home.

Ever since making the "Making Mark Lee Y/N's Boyfriend" pact with your neighbor, you've been spending a lot more time together than you've ever had in the past. Admittingly, you've been enjoying it.

When did you last laugh as hard as you did when he attempted to step over the fence separating your houses? ("I can do it, my legs are long enough. Watch.") The boy ended up stuck with one leg half over and the other dangling off and because he looked ridiculous, you ended up on the soft grass of your backyard, tears in the corners of your eyes as you laughed.

When was the last time you felt comfortable enough with a person to share your deepest insecurities with each other in the dead of the night? Texting him nothing but a sad emoji as the clock hits 3am, receiving a response almost immediately - "Can I call you?". Talking about your ambitions, dreams, and fears until the sun rose above the horizon and you both realized you had school in an hour.

That didn't mean you liked him or anything though, right?

You liked Mark.

Or so you thought.

Maybe?

Fuck. How dare Donghyuck confuse you like this.

Sometimes, you wonder how things turn out. How the smallest choices can lead you down a whole new path entirely. And how they all led to Lee Donghyuck currently being sprawled on his stomach on your bed, legs swinging in the air.

Right. You had a date with the other Lee. The one you allegedly had a crush on. Well, it wasn't a date per se. It was more of a one on one friendly hangout? Donghyuck had gotten movie tickets for both him and Mark - then ditched the day before and said you would go in his place. It was kind of genius.

"Okay, would Mark like this color better than the blue?" You ask, clothes strewn across the floor. A good chunk of your day had been spent digging through your closet looking for clothes you think Mark would like. Your neighbor couldn't care less about your crisis. He barely spared a glance up at you before he returned to whatever he was looking at on his phone.

"Looks good."

"Donghyuck, I need you to keep up your half of the deal."

The boy finally gives you his attention. Pulling himself up so that he's sitting on the edge on your bed, staring straight at you.

"Shouldn't you want him to like you as you are? There's no point doing all this-" He gestures to the mess, "-just to impress him. I think you'd look nice even if you chose to wear your pajamas out."

"But he doesn't like me. Not yet at least. That's why I have you to help me."

"...Right."

The atmosphere suddenly becomes stuffy. You wonder if you said the wrong thing because suddenly, the boy next door is leaving. It's not surprising given that the both of you spent half a day going through your wardrobe and he probably had things to do. But, you just can't shake the uneasy feeling.

"Hey, are we good? Did I say something wrong?"

"No, we're good. Good luck." Donghyuck says at your door, a smile unlike any of the previous ones you've seen gracing his face. It seemed forced.

A faint pitter patter of rain hitting the window panes sounds through the quiet room.

You hope he made it home without getting wet.

"Man, I didn't know you liked Spiderman too."

"Mmhm."

You made it to the theatres with Mark. You enjoyed watching the movie with Mark. You were getting driven home by Mark. You had a great time with your crush. So why was your mind still on a certain situation and a certain someone from before.

"My other friends all watched it on a day I got called into work so I was surprised when Haechan was willing to re-watch it with me - he's usually not that nice, you know?"

The edges of your mouth lift a little at the dig at Donghyuck. In front, the windshield wipers squeak a little, trying their best to rid the glass of rain droplets. The radio plays an old song in the background that Mark hums softly to, thumbs tapping in time on the wheel while waiting for the lights to turn green. It was cozy, but could never measure up to how intimate you felt in the car with Donghyuck.

"Then he dips last minute. Honestly, I shouldn't have been surprised. I was more surprised that you were coming instead though - I thought you would've wanted to watch it with Haechan."

Your brows furrow. "Why?"

"Oh - I thought you liked him."

The world around you stopped. Though the light turned green and the car was definitely moving now, you felt your entire body freeze.

"How did you come to that conclusion?"

Mark's confusion showed on his face, his emotions always did. That was one of the things you liked about him. Or so, you thought.

"Well, for starters, you're much more comfortable around him. I don't know if that's just because you always tense up when I'm around. I'm sorry if I've done anything to make you uncomfortable by the way, it was never my intention."

Mark Lee, your supposed crush, thought you were uncomfortable around him. You lean your head against the window of his car, it was nice and cool. Perfect as you let yourself ponder.

You always were unnecessarily nervous around him - but wasn't that normal? You liked him. You liked his smile, how he was able to win the favors of everyone around him so easily, how he was always reliable, how good he was at sports- oh.

It was never romantic.

You didn't know anything about Mark. You never even had a proper conversation with him. What he liked to do in his spare time, what his plan was for the future, what stupid habit he has, what he sounds like over the phone at 3am. You had no idea.

But you knew what Donghyuck liked to do in his spare time, what he wanted to do in the future, what his stupid habit was, what he sounded like over the phone at 3am.

Fuck.

And it all came rushing to you all at once.

The prize was always something shiny, blazing, and brilliant. It was something you wanted but would put on a shelf to admire. Mark Lee was your prize. Someone you admired. He was never someone you imagined having debates with for the rest of your life. He was never someone you imagined spending rainy days indoors together with.

Perhaps, after all this time, the prize wasn't what you were after. Perhaps, what you really wanted was to spend time with-

"No way."

"Hm?"

"I like Lee Donghyuck."

Your admiration for Mark was a luminous, fleeting feeling that you mistook for love. Love was never about having to dress like a different person to impress them. Love was laughing together at the smallest things, showing up in two week old pajamas and still thinking they're the most beautiful being you've laid eyes on, and sometimes, love was fighting over a parking spot outside your house.

Mark grins. "Great. He's been in love with you since third grade."

"What?'

"Why do you think he's never dated before? All this time, he's been waiting for you to realize."

"I'm glad we got closer today," Mark mentions, pulling onto your street, "you seem a lot more comfortable now."

Yeah, because you no longer thought Mark was your dream man. A weight was taken off your shoulders now and you didn't feel the need to keep up an act around him anymore.

"Thanks for today."

"Hey dude, no worries. Just let me know if you need any help wooing Haechan alright? I love helping couples get together."

"...Didn't you try before with two other couples?"

"...Yeah... They didn't turn out how I thought they would."

The two of you share a laugh before you clamber out of his vehicle and wave him goodbye from your porch. The rain had started pouring down from the grey skies but your fingers hesitate at your door.

Fuck it.

Instead of walking into your warm and dry house, you decide to brave the rain and run over to your neighbor's, splashing through the puddles without care. It soaked the clothes you spent forever deciding on and ruined your meticulously done hair, but urgent times call for urgent measures.

Two knocks and the door swings open, revealing the boy next door behind. His eyes widen at the sight of you taking heaving breaths on his doorstep, hair and clothes complete wet and still getting pelted on by the rain.

"Did he hurt you?"

The urge to laugh bubbles through you. He was always putting you first. All this time, he was helping you chase another man. He was ready to give up on his chance with you if that meant you had a chance of being happy with someone else. Even now, after you'd hurt him, he was still worried about you.

"Lee Donghyuck, I'm in love with you."

For a while, everything's silent. Even the rain fell mute on your ears. All you could see was your rival's jaw open in shock and his Adams apple bobbing up and down trying to find the words to say. It was quite a satisfying view.

Then you start rambling as panic settles in. The need to apologize for hurting him, how you actually felt about Mark, how you found out about your feelings. Old habits die hard.

Except, not even a full sentence into your unplanned speech, Donghyuck steps out of his house, into the rain, and cuts you off with his warm, soft lips on yours. You stumble back, not expecting the sudden weight on you, and the two of you fall back onto the wet, cold grass on his front yard.

"You have no idea how long I've waited to hear that."

His face was as close to yours as physically possible, eyes gazing lovingly over your features, wanting to soak every second of this moment in.

"Let me guess, since third grade?"

"I knew Mark couldn't be trusted."

Laughter claims you both before you pull him in by the collar for another kiss. There were grass stains on your clothes, it was cold and muddy, and the two of you will definitely end up with a cold the next day, but somehow, in that moment, you felt as though the world was yours.

"I kept my end of the deal."

"What do you mean?"

"You ended up getting a boyfriend with the name "Lee". I think that means I get the parking spot."

You smile.

"I'd happily do the walk of shame for you."

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fountainpenguin · 4 months ago

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@nalooksthrough - LSDKJFSKLDJFS, I'm glad I'm not the only one who had the cursed "Dale-Mark jealousy over injuries" thought 😂 Toxic Lemon Duo, my disaster beloved...

Is anyone at Dimmsdale High okay actually

Alt Dale-Mark Dynamic:

Same hat.

Sidenote: It's funny how Dale looks 10 times more like Dale once you add his tired eye underlines sdflkhj

#Fairly OddParents #City Lights AU #Mark Chang #Dale Dimmadome owner of Dimmadome Global #FOP Vicky #Gary and Betty #Sometimes I forget Gary is actually like. a student #Nalooksthrough #reblogs #(Sort of)#apparently art #FAIRIES!#FOP fanart #dead dove #Toxic lemon duo #Rotten candy apple ship tag

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b00tyyyshak3rrr9000 · 3 months ago

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🧬⋮ ♯; ⤷ GREETINGS, INTERNET .ᐟ👾🧪

Ah, hello there! It is I, Bootyyyshaker9000. Hm, seems you’ve been given the honour of finding my blog. Congratulations are in order.

(RP ACCOUNT RUN BY @donniepodsshow)

“ Prepare to eateth thy words! ”

⌗ㆍノLOG 1 : INTRODUCTION

Donatello Hamato (he/it/any) speaking. To put it simply, I am a genius. Do not doubt that, or I will give you a professional PowerPoint presentation to inform you how sorely mistaken you are.

⌗ㆍノLOG 2 : RULES

✰ DNI : tc£st, N$FW, and/or pr0sh!p. You are not welcome here. As well as those who discriminate against minorities, such as rac!sts trans/homophobes, s3xists, antisemites, ect. You can fuck off.

✰ So of course, this blog is a safe space for the LGBTQIA+ community.

✰ This blog is run by a MINOR. The character of Donatello is a minor as well (TEENAGE Mutant Ninja Turtles).

✰ Please do not flirt, sexualize or make romantic comments towards me.

✰ I am autistic and use tone tags, please be patient! (Blog owner, as well as the character, are both autistic:))

⌗ㆍノLOG 3 : ART + TAGS

✰ Some asks will be answered with sketches and doodles! So please don’t repost said art without credit or claim it as your own. TAGS :

✰ #othello talks : my miscellaneous posts, rambles, and such.

✰ #reblog : what it says on the tin.

✰ #chat time : asks with my adoring audience.

✰ #disaster twins : reblogs/posts related to me + my dumb dumb twin.

✰ #pb&j : reblogs/posts related to me + my baby brother.

✰ #brains and brawn : reblogs/posts related to me + big Raphie.

✰ #dna duo : reblogs/posts related to me + my older sister.

⌗ㆍノLOG 4 : THE BELOVED FAM

TO BE ADDED…

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1moreoffkeyanthem · 1 year ago

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TODAY ON Me Never Shutting TF Up About OrangeJuiceVerse:

Let’s talk abt the Disaster Duo.

Aka Kenny McCormick and Stan Marsh. These two… smh they really are each other’s enablers (as Ky pointed out here) in all things. Naturally, I have headcanons that haven’t seen the light of day yet.

Aight so if u know the ojverse, you know that our sweet leading man Stanley Marsh absolutely thinks of Kenny as his Blood Brother In Desperation (someone get this man (me) away from FOB’s discography) and the platonic stenny bond is SO real. They’re always down to do stupid shit together and are 100% the reason Kyle has high blood pressure.

Kenny, on more than one occasion, has done some shit like gone up to Stan like “hey dude you wanna climb the water tower” and Stan didn’t even question it he was just “sure why not” when I say Marj and Kyle were sooo pissed bc Kenny fell off the ladder and knocked Stan off too on the way down lmfao these two idiots were in so much trouble for hurting themselves in a completely avoidable way.

Oh my GOD they set shit on fire all the time out here trying to start a grill because they’ve dubbed themselves the “grillmasters” and then suddenly Stan has no arm hairs. BOTH of them have threatened to drink lighter fluid at minor inconveniences.

As referenced here, Kenny, as a true weirdo artist boy (I’m projecting) once mixed acetone and resin INDOORS (he and Stan were drunk and not thinking) and the fumes were so strong that Stan deadass passed out and it was soooo stupid Kyle was so mad at them. With bigger projects throughout their ENTIRE lives if Ken is like building a big ass sculpture or sum he’s going to Stan and like Cartman will go out to the backyard of the Survivor House to see them dangling from the roof to get the top parts on and just sends a pic in the groupchat to get them in trouble smh

Oh my god I’ve mentioned that Stan had a parkour phase in middle school (referenced here) and who was with him trying to do backflips and vault over walls? Kenneth. This one time they were like “dude we should expand our gymnastics skills” “oh yeah for sure” and they started trying to do that two person cartwheel thing and they THOUGHT they got it down and went to show Kyle but they completely busted their asses like landing in a tangle of limbs and shit (Kenny died) bruh Kyle was SO fuckin mad like “THE FUCK ARE YALL DOIN THAT IN THE STREET FOR” and Stan was all “uhhh cuz it’s a flat stretch of ground? Duh” dumbasses

Canonically in the OrangeJuiceVerse these two are both school mascots (Stan only for the season Kenny played basketball, Kenny through the entirety of hs) and have stupid signature moves that they do in the “stank ass cow suit”. Like Kenny literally gets shot out of a cannon to kickoff football games and Stan does flips that are seriously not safe with the low visibility in a mascot head they actually have no sense of self preservation until someone gets hurt. Ohhh my god one time at a football game Stan was benched for whatever reason and he was BORED so he’s bothering Marj and Kenny and the other cheerleaders and he was full on “wait Ken stand on my shoulders and find Ky in the crowd” so they’re walking around the track like that (stunt buddies at their peak) and no one is watching the game they’re just distracted by whatever tf these two have going on and then the coach notices and is like “goddamnit MARSH! Get on the field!” Smh mans got unbenched for his own safety how ironic

As kids? No one went harder playing superheroes than these two. Cartman may have been the one leaning too hard into the “marketing” side of things (“fatass you can’t call yourself that! It’s a fucking slur!”) but Stan and Kenny were out here terrorizing construction sites bc there was so much cool shit to climb

Even as adults the shenanigans don’t stop dude Stan and Kyle drove over to the city to see Ken and Marj and Ky woke up in the middle of the night and Stan wasn’t there he went to get Marj “dude wake up the guys are gone” guess where the Disaster Duo was? Trying to get into a closed water park by digging under the fence. Yes they were in Trouble.

And when they’re older and Stan’s sober so you’d think he’d be slightly less inclined to do dumb shit? NOPE! He and Kenny are going WAY too hard at paintball and Stan falls off the top of an obstacle bc he was in “sniping mode” and “it’s like irl Fortnite!”

On their own? These two are fairly tame with some exceptions. Together? Someone needs an emergency room.

#please lmfao #south park #headcanons #back on the #OrangeJuiceVerse #bullshit #who is surprised #sp headcanons #stan marsh #kenny mccormick #my beloved Disaster Duo #my shit #ao3 shit #ojv

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1moreoffkeyanthem · 9 months ago

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Kenny McCormick has absolutely done this

#I’m OrangeJacking this post #just imagine first yr of college ken walking home from studio hours seeing a pigeon like you’re coming home with me #yes he got in trouble with the guys for that #except Stan bc my beloved Disaster Duo is always down w the shenanigans #Stan fully said well this place did need a pet #the pigeon lived in the Survivor House garage until the guys moved out #Kyle complained but was secretly the main one to feed it

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bloopitynoot · 2 months ago

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Reading SVSSS: Bonus- Chapter 31

For those who don't know, I am reading SVSSS for the first time and sharing my thoughts!

If you have not read it, there will be spoilers! Consider this a warning.

Also- if you want to follow along, I am aiming to post updates daily. You can find all the posts in the tag bloopitynoot reads SVSSS. You can also check out the intro post for context on my read.

I am in a food coma right now, I am not going to lie. I went on a double date today that was a donut crawl part 1/2. We went to two local donut shops and sampled donuts- it was so tasty but also, SO MUCH SUGAR.

(I did read the chapter pre donut meal though with some white tea).

Left side Lady Glaze: we rated these 3/5. They were fine. But honestly not as good as they were when they opened the shop! Right side Debrodniks, much better but so sweet 4/5.

We have two more places to check out, but that will be another weekend LOL.

let's gooo chapter 31

I'm three sentences in and already intrigued by the chapter. Although, I am terrified for the nature of the survey questions. p339

unrelated to this chapter- this is such a random thing to include in this book. What I would give to have a glimpse into the brain of MXTX. Like I 100% want to know how this book came together and why certain things were included or not. So good

starting this interview with sass from Binghe AND unanswered age questions that even airplane has 0 idea about. pp339-340

Also airplane with this survey: yeah, let's just not answer these next 30 questions....p340

Airplane: describe each other. SQQ with 0 chill: (not actually but my interpretation of this literature) LBH cries so much, is a little bitch, and is also a big simp. LBH: Shizun is so kind. p340

Wait, this went from kind of awful for the duo to really soft. "What do you hate about one another?" LBH & SQQ: Nothing. p341.

Baby Binghe wants to husband this man so badly. p342

oh god. The fact that LBH thinks the Water Prison was their first date is WILD. p343

"A helpless masochist; beyond cure" not wrong about LBH. p345

My personal headcanon during this interview is that airplane is listening to these two and watching them interact and simultaneously questioning two things; 1. his own relationship dynamic with Mobei-jun and how the two in front of him are a disaster 2. his entire writing of LBH in PIDW and what has become of his beloved protagonist. p347

LOL WAIT. The next page he does indeed reflect on the second thought I wrote and PIDW. p348

"Best way to please your partner during sex" LBH: <confidently> not crying. Pls help this man, the standards LOL. p350

These two are so weird, but they work

I honestly don't know how they work, I don't even know how to describe this couple to other people, but like good for them. What two absolute weirdos. One is trying to actively gaslight themselves into being straight (while actively caring about the other) and the other is just smitten. So damn weird.

ONE MORE CHAPTER TO GO! I hope to read it tomorrow morning (honestly mostly because Monday I want to start on the massive pile of fanfic yall have been so kind to share with me).

#bloopitynoot reads svsss #svsss spoilers #mxtx svsss #svsss #scum villian self saving system #scum villain #bingqiu #RIP airplanes points

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merao-mariposa · 7 months ago

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I have your back, you have my heart

Day three of the pissa/death duo week! This au was the idea of @amymorningstar in this post I really wanted to write about the Mafia Pissa and this was a good excuse for!

“Mafia + I promised you as long as I'm with you you'll never be alone again”

(…)

Philza Minecraft had been on the dark side of the streets for a very long, long time, since his first interventions dismantling brothels that were a little too... “flexible” with the idea of consent going to authentic inhumane places, all falling under the scourge of the Angel of Death until a man, a friend, appeared in front of him with the idea of dominating the criminal world, converting it to his ideals. That was a long time ago but corruption spreads like a fire in gasoline and Phil was there to suffocate it until it went out.

Maybe it was his cruelty in how he snuffed out the lives of those corrupt men that led him to pay the karma he was paying right now, he doesn't know.

The man sitting at his desk looked miserable for say the least, from the outside you feel the discord in the trademark half-twisted hat or the uncorked bottle of wine resting on his messy desk but you can see how the damage runs deeper than that if you know Philza well enough, the immaculate two pieces-suit stand out like a sore thumb on a man so casual and relaxed, the white shirt is buttoned at the neck almost restrictively, and his trail of beard is just a little more prominent than it has been in recent months.

The last few months, that sugar-filled almost year where mafia boss BOLAS had been closer to being an angel than he would ever be since he lived in what he could only call heaven.

His arrival in heaven was a young man with messy, dark hair. His purple eyes dragged him deep into the flames of hell now that they were no longer looking at him.

The fact that he had no one else to blame but himself didn't make it any easier.

But when Sinfonia appeared everything was perfect. He was reserved but easy to smile, aloof but with loyal friends, so pathetic (and cute) yelling at the slightest threat but he was a real threat in front of some of the most ruthless members of BOLAS, selective but had two beautiful kids who looked alike barely in the whites of the eyes, even his last name “Sinfonia” evidenced the harsh contradiction that surrounds the object of the crow's loves, a man as gifted in every possible musical instrument as if he had the Midas touch, and yet that very appropriate last name wasn't real. His Missa was a set of contradictions and embarrassing coincidences over knots in lavender stems.

Which in retrospect must have been a loud alarm, a siren announcing the disaster that his false moon left in its wake in the crow's heart.

It turns out that his love lied, the fire burning inside him to abandon important meetings for the sole purpose of sharing more time of his life with him as opposed to the absolute security of being understood as someone returning to his childhood home (beloved, cared, welcome) with the ease of riding a bike. All of that had been a waste.

The soft hugs that lulled him into deep dreams (chasing away the nightmares that Missa shouldn't know about for his own good) to the chaste kisses all over the face that released the negativity from his husband's shoulders (and if instead of being a result of his low self-esteem was his guilt taking charge?) to the private kisses that said “I miss you” and “one last time, love” without the words, all were nothing but lies.

Not that he had cared much about anything at that moment, he found himself focused on his children (because now they were also Phil's children) they were angels and he only had the head to raise them with Missa, who returned with a sweeter demeanor after his night walks and long work trips, he tenderly asked for nap together as a family.

He should have questioned more why Missa disappeared like that, coincidentally, just when Phil was paying for the services of the most dangerous mercenary on the black market, unlike the assassins he had on his payroll, this guy had the prestige of killing only with his touch, too lethal and above all cautious, Phil did not even met him in person, they only contacted through third parties who agreed on the service and only told about his violet hood and his skull mask. It is said; no one has seen his face and lived to tell.

Like I said before; Phil is old, he's been in the environment for years where only an intelligent man could live as long as he does, with that in mind how was it possible that he didn't know that his sweet husband was actually the most dangerous bastard in the underworld? Shocked by the discovery, in this kind of world, someone you trust can stab you in the back so how can you trust a man who lied to you?

And Missa knew who Philza Minecraft was, what his name means, he always knew, he did always know when something had gone wrong and Philza needed more comfort, always two steps ahead of his needs because he knew it.

The time after their fight breaks up, everything is a drunken blur in the crow's mind, he doesn't remember what they said, he only knows the screams and the revolver clicking in his left pocket while Missa, The Reaper or whoever it was have knowledge of the gun in his pocket and as soon as he pointed it at the man he said he loved time ago the gun was already on the ground, rolling behind this man who was unrecognizable to Phil, the shouting match continued more heated after the blonde pointed his gun at the helpless and clumsy Missa.

That was the last time he saw Missa.

Phil has been so distracted, tired and paranoid since then, even the security is a disaster ignoring the advice of the rest of BOLAS. Philza has scattered guards in unimportant areas, some stuck to him all day but the majority watch that Missa does not return or get close to the children (his children; Missa's own children) Chayanne almost bites him at the slightest suspicion of not being able to see his father, so his impenetrable fortress suddenly becomes a weak place.

Literally and metaphorically

He ordered several guards not to even dream of setting foot in certain areas of the family mansion (those such as the music room, the kitchen and the art studio, any room with traces of Missa must remain identical to how it was before his departure, as if they were waiting for him)

Philza feels betrayed and hurt but above all he is so confused, his rational mind tells him to defend himself, to put up the highest walls to protect himself, his organization and his family but his family is Missa. He is outside and Philza once promised that he will demolish every wall in the world that did not open its doors for the man with purple eyes.

And yet here he is.

Inside his fortress it can breathe the air of a broken family, the kids have believed him for the moment but the tension is felt increasing with every minute they pass without hearing from their papa. Inside the fortress are no longer him and his chicks but a greedy and lonely crow with two brittle shells and a broken heart.

The days pass in that agony until there is a surprise attack from which they cannot respond.

Tensions with the Federal mafia had gotten much worse in recent months, after his formal alliance with Soulfire he did not believe they were going to attack seriously.

But they did.

Thank his Goddess, thank The Lady for allowing Chayanne and Tallulah to be in the school while the white clad mercenaries broke down every door and shot at anything that moved.

At least Missa would get them back and they would be together again. Just as they should have been before he and his greedy hope for a family took that away from them.

As soon as his office door is kicked down one of those white masked sons of bitches puts his hands on him, something happens.

Penetrating in his vision when he sees him but there is stealth in his steps, he is the only one to notice his presence until two bullets (how quickly are repeated) knock down two of the men to dead, wound another in the shoulder, and the last one misses just centimeters away for paint the wall with Philza's skull.

Four shots, two fired before the reaction time of their distracted predators and attacked from the purest darkness, shots fly towards the door and if it was not absolutely broken after that rude kick it is now unusable, falling from its hinges under the siege and behind it are no signs of the mysterious shooter.

Tense seconds pass until one of the feds quickly puts one of his dirty hands in Phil's hair, pulling hard on the golden strands in a hissing threat and that's when he enters the scene.

The men on each side of the door were the first to fall, one quickly takes the place of his fallen companion, his gun raised, ready to shoot, followed by the one with the shot in the shoulder, unfortunately with that wound he is not able to shoot at time to prevent another bullet from the darkness from taking the life of the other one.

The bullets fly again while the threshold of the door swallows the corpse, dragging it out and soon, very soon, his savior enters the room with a constant step carrying the dead body as a kind of human shield.

A well-placed shot, other fall.

And the guy who touched him is one of them, his screams are muffled by his mask and by the gunshots exploding around him.

Phil hides under his desk as fast as he can but not before taking a bullet in the shoulder, it hurts like shit.

But it seems that it hurts them more because he can hear how one by one the white masks fall with sharp blows, they could barely scream in horror before fall with a fatal shott.

Fast, efficient and lethal

When it seems that the rain of bullets is ending, Phil distinguishes the voices from outside his office. That sounds like… Chainsaws? And laughs Phil knows immediately that his best people, who should be with his children, are on and from what he hears they are having fun.

He slowly peeks out of his desk, his hand warm from the blood dripping from his shoulder, and finally sees the reason of his recent insomnia.

Missa, or also known as The Reaper, moves almost with grace but the anger burns in his every movement, it is a wild spectacle as soon as the bullets run out, each man who even tries to get close to Phil is shot down with ease, he watch in trance as his husband smash anyone who tries to get close to him to pieces.

“M- Missa…?” he comes out as a dismayed whisper

The Reaper turns to look at him for half a second, which one of them takes advantage of to kick him in the stomach. Missa lets out a grunt of acute pain but holds the guy's leg with his hands, taking advantage of pushing him forward, knocking another of them against the favorite glass table.

The two guys are left on the floor, one on top of the other and one's suit is now full of glass.

And just like that Missa goes for the next one and Phil can only watch in shock.

Missa is The Reaper, The Reaper is Missa. They are both the same person; they have been forever.

Missa, his Missa is his mercenary and his mercenary is his husband.

he approaches, slowly, as slowly as he can with a bullet embedded in his shoulder. The cacophony of screams shakes the floor and Philza suddenly realizes that he must have gone down to the panic room.

The weight of not doing so clings to his shoulders, the clear implications trying to cross the capo’s tired mind like a malicious whisper makes him feels so wrong, so manipulative.

But he was waiting for him to save him

Of a thousand people in this aggressive environment who swore their loyalty to him and finds himself depending on the arrival of the one who not only never swore anything to him but also betrayed him.

Oh well, who betrayed who?

After yelling at him for lying to him when he also lied, pointing a gun at him and taking him away from his own children, he knows that the Philza of the past would have sent him to hell for ruining the things with Missa.

Missa knew who he was before, he knew it from very early on and that affected Phil, it made him feel cornered and at a disadvantage. He realized at that moment that he was afraid; he didn't fear the hitman under his roof as much as he feared the man under his sheets. feared he was so vulnerable letting him walk around the red mafia's base of operations, taking the children to school every morning, training Chayanne and hearing Tallulah's flute in the distance did terrified him, his worst nightmare was in how his heart was warmed by them so soft and gentle in the reaper's expert hands he could take out his heart and the worst thing is that he would have left it in order to see the children and Missa every morning when he woke up.

My God, he was crazy, he went crazy when he fell in love with him and even crazier when Phil sabotaged his own happiness.

Loneliness tasted bitter on his lips, power and honor became poison with the diffuse days, with his cold bed at night, with his absence piercing his chest.

The last man fell and with the elegance of a dancer stabbed by a steel dagger into his chest, he did the same with the other two men on the ground. The Reaper left no witnesses or loose ends.

He could hear in the distance Baghera and Cellbit stopping their chainsaws which was a good sign. The Federation had basically sent a mini army to his grounds and he partly wondered if his men knew that Missa was there with him.

His name tasted salty when it finally left Phil's lips in a whisper, it tasted like the tears he shed every time he was sober to remember his absence. Behind that mask it is almost impossible to perceive the purple eyes but he knows well that look that is hidden in front of him.

Missa wipes the blood on his own pants with slow movements, the dagger pressed against his thigh until it's clean enough.

“Missa…” Phil insists, he shouldn't insist to the man who has the dagger, especially when he is hurt.

The hairs on the back of his neck stand on end as he feels (not sees) the intense gaze on his shrunken figure, well, at least he now has his attention. The purple eyes that he loves so much scan him from top to bottom and a wave of shame hits the stunned and guilty part of his subconscious as he remembers how he looks even worse for being in the middle of a fucking shootout. That wasn't how he would have wanted to see him again see but it was the most likely way to meet again now that he knew they were in the same work area

His eyes seem to linger on the wound on his shoulder and if he could see his husband's face, he would say he was not pleased with it.

“…Phil” Missa's voice sounds like a late greeting and is focused on him.

Goddess, how he had missed that voice

The professional, and infamous mercenary approaches, a little more hesitant than he should for a man of his reputation and a wave of affection breaks over Philza, he too takes a single step closer and they are looking at each other as the first time, feels like looking at the moon at its peak or the sun descending. He can't, he doesn't have the right to act like a wet cat after tearing up his enemies and expecting Phil to be normal about it. Missa just can't do that to him, he bites back a light laugh and takes another step in his direction. noticing that there is blood on his clothes and some cuts on it but if I had to guess I would say that most of it is from the others and Phil is already losing blood himself.

Missa takes another step, knowing the bleeding has stopped and believing the bullet grazed but he won't be sure until he concentrates on something other than mustering the words to ask him to fucking take off the mask.

Fortunately, he seems to read his mind as Phil doesn't even finish taking another slow step towards him when the mask is finally gone, The Reaper has officially left the room and his husband looms in front of him in his place. Is it strange to say that death is good for him? His face, his hair and the sparkle in his eyes or is the blonde just delirious?

Be that as it may, it doesn't take long for them to find themselves in the middle of the destroyed office as if it were his own world.

"You went"

“You kicked me out.”

“You still shouldn't have left” he replied very intelligently and Missa smiled, a little nervous.

“Does it hurt so much?” The black-haired man worried, looking at his injured shoulder and Philza wasn't having his partner distracted just like that.

"No, no. It doesn't hurt" He responded, knowing that lies were not the best for the relationship at this time.

Missa frowned like a kitten about to sneeze but he allowed this one for him, just for now.

“You… you're right Philza” Missa lowered his head in shame and a confuse “what?” died in the blonde's throat.

"I shouldn't have left-"

“I pointed at you with a gun, mate” he interrupted, feeling guilty and a little freaked out by whatever that means, it all was his fault, why was Missa saying that?

“Still, I should have stayed, I wanted to stay” hesitantly he noticed how Missa’s arms floated loosely around him. They weren't very elegant clothes, just good enough for work and Philza wanted to focus on that and the stains of blood all over his man instead of the new confession, after everything he did, but how could Missa still wanted him?

“Missa…”

“I promised, right?” Phil raised his head suddenly, searching for his gaze between the strands of black hair that escaped from his messy ponytail. “I always keep my promises, dear”

When the members of Bolas made sure they had the entire area clean, they advanced, covering the entire perimeter until they climbed the stairs that led to the red leader's office, they found themselves face to face with the splintered frame of the door, an office in an absolute disaster. with the imposing doors thrown next to the lifeless bodies and in the eye of that past storm was the mob boss.

Philza was leaning against his desk (which was out of its place) the purple cloth acted as an improvised tourniquet and in his arms was the waist of a tall man with black hair that they had trouble recognizing at first if it weren't for the clear display of affection, unaware that they had company. Now Phil kept his face buried in the taller man's torso as if he were afraid to let him go again and Missa hummed, deeply satisfied with having his little bird in his arms again, he carefully avoided the other man's shoulder but remained attentive, didn't want to leave that wound out of sight until he could drag his husband stubborn ass to the infirmary. Ignoring the living and dead audience, the couple was trapped in their own world, little giggles that didn't seem to go anywhere, dying and returning with each other's laughter in a vicious circle, finally together.

“I promised you, I didn’t? as long as I'm with you you'll never be alone again, cuervito”

EXTRA:

“You look pretty good with that ponytail you know, mate?”

“Philza!”

“So, guys, do I tell Jaiden that there will be no divorce?”

“Shut the fuck up, Charlie”

#qsmp #qsmp missa #qsmp philza #pissa #pissa week #pissa/deathduo week #pissa au #qsmp shipping #tw mafia themes #tw dead mention #nothing graphic #but still #qsmp bolas

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i-did-it-again-cringe · 8 months ago

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Rewatching rise! as you you do, and I hate to say it fellas. I think my favorite brother dynamic is the tidepod duo. Disaster twins my beloved but Leo and Mikey are so funny 😭

#rottmnt #unpause rottmnt #save rottmnt #tmnt leonardo #rottmnt mikey #rise leo #tide pod duo

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blubun0309 · 1 year ago

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THEY'RE SO SILLY I LOVE THEM SO MUCH

yet another gif

#THEM <3 #Disaster twins my beloved #they are very dear to me #my favorite rottmnt duo actually #rottmnt #disaster twins

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tumblingghosts · 10 months ago

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tbosas time travellers

EDIT: this is an OLD masterpost- please refer to this one

——

rest of the original masterpost:

i ADORE time travel to pieces but have way too many ideas that i'm not sure will ever be expanded into full fics, so i'm just going to start posting unrelated snippets on tumblr with a #tbosas time travellers tag so they get a chance at being out there somewhere

collection on ao3: time travel my beloved <3

might make this a masterpost if i remember to keep editing these:

time traveller (just one!)

sejanus lands in the end of junior year w/ trauma - ao3

sejanus is back at the jabberjay & decks coriolanus - ao3

sejanus comes back with bruises around his neck [tumblr update - posted on ao3 with coryo's pov and sejanus's pov]

livia is back in time and ready to screw over coriolanus - ao3

livia becomes besties w/ sejanus & is very spiteful - ao3

katniss in tbosas times because she & sejanus should be friends

prim in tbosas times because she should get to kick snow in the shin

tigris back in tbosas times and has a hard time rationalizing coryo vs president snow

marcus gets a second chance and runs - ao3

felix is back in time and dill gets a sympathetic mentor - ao3

clemensia is back in time and reaper is very confused by his strange mentor - ao3

sejanus is back at eight-years-old & makes his own fix-it - ao3

multiple time travellers :0

livia is spite and sejanus is trauma (both are back)

coryo dies to the snake and both he and sejanus end up back in time [link on ao3]

time loop where the victors of the games join the loop [link on ao3]

marcus and sejanus are in a time loop (as told by coryo) [link on ao3]

time travel asks & other posts :D

lucy gray & sejanus in the future! re: d12

persephone & mizzen time loop :(

persephone time travel fix it :D

festus time travel fix it :D

katniss time travel (ft. jessup) + expanded au

pup & treech time loop [links]

felix time travel & abyssal’s additional felix au

livia time loop fix it (ft. facet)

felix & clemmie time travel scenarios

coral time travel + treech & circ & clemmie

iphigenia & solarmoss time loop

mentors' kiddos but it's solasta & mossring

mentors' kiddos prevent evil coriolanus

time travelling clemmie and hector dovecote :0

festus creed disaster time loop :P

medea's time travelling clemmie masterpost

lily's iphigenia & dennis time travel plot

hector dovecote joins the narrative + time travelling clemmie

medea’s response to clemmie going back post snake bites

sejanus going back to the dark days (ft. strabo)

time travelling kiddos but with different kiddos

time travelling kiddos but solasta has a power

medea’s time travelling dovecote duo + part 2

sheaf time loop & tribute escape plan

treaper time travel love story fix it

time travelling ginnee & tribute escape plan

festixia back at the tenth hunger games

sejanus back to when he moved to the capitol

victor facet landing back at the tenth games

misc time travelling posts & fics :3

eurylochus goes from the thunder saga back to troy saga

snape time travel one-shots (whumptober 2023) - ao3

snape and draco land in the marauders era - ao3

draco time travel one-shots (au of tdbland by rbooks) - ao3

===

intro stuff for the pinned post:

hi! i'm backpacks! :D

major time travel enthusiast [i'm always open to yap about time travel -- send me asks on it anytime] <3

expect to see a variety of reblogs here; including, but not limited to: tbosas (snowjanus, sejarcus, sejanus plinth <3), harry potter (marauders era, snape & draco, snegulus), mcyt (hermitcraft, dsmp, life series, technoblade), epic the musical (polites & eurylochus are my favs), mcu (loki & thor), orv (kimcom), saiki k, etc.

current obsessions: tbosas, epic the musical, & hp (but more than happy to talk about any fandoms i am familiar with!)