#zoo keeper au

[sulphuric-onyx]

Just saw @slyvester101's water park au post, and a, that's fucking brilliant, I love it, and b, seeing the love of the silly au ideas for the skittle soldiers reminded me of a zoo keeper au idea I had a little while ago, so here's that.

The idea mainly focused on Wash and Tucker, because what else do I write about, so I'll talk about them and what they're jobs are as keepers first. (also not all of the reds and blues are here, so feel free to come up with where you think they'd be)

-Tucker is their resident "Shit nobody wants to go anywhere near guy", primarily working with the big cats, and the few snakes they have there. He lives for working up the crowds during any feeding times or exhibitions, and has gained a bit of a reputation for it, turning into a slight attraction for the park.

-Wash sticks to the calmer side of the park, or at least as calm as it can get where they all work, usually found in Avery whistling back to the birds, or in their marine enclosures. However, he's one of the most researched at the park, and gets called in as a pseudo announcer for a lot of the parks shows, mainly Tucker's, which is where the real attraction for the crowd lies.

Wash makes little comments and jokes at Tucker during his shows, i.e "this strategy your seeing here is similar to Tucker's own mating efforts, which is to say ineffective," and other things along those lines, and Tucker usually flirts at him in response over their mics to get a rise out of him, which is really what the park goers come to see.

-Kai works at all of the interactive enclosures, mainly the small petting zoo area, and the tortoise exhibit where park goers can feed them and pat their shelves if the tortoises decide to come closer enough. Usually Tucker's not far behind her either, visiting her to gossip and bitch between shows.

-Carolina works in the antarctic section, polar bears, emperor penguins, a few specific kinds of seals, etc, her and Wash end up working together on a few enclosures so they spend a lot of time together, and as much as they claim not to, they gossip just as much as everyone else.

-Grif works at the sloth and lizard enclosures, and he will be damned if he has to be anywhere else, which has nothing to do with the fact that it's right next to where Simmons works at the monkey and orangutan enclosures, and Simmons loves talking to people about how intelligent they are to anyone who will listen, which is usually Grif.

-the squad leaders are frequent park goers, who are kind of hoping for a job there at some point, which all of the current crew claim to hate the idea of, but they've been subtly mentoring all of them with the skills and things they'll need to know to get hired.

-Kimball is the one managing this whole god forsaken place, don't ask about her, she's got enough going on as it is.

[3-pots-of-soup]

hc zoo keeper au cause it’s been swimming in my mind for months, first up magic mountain:

gem: fish and co

scar: big cats

mumbo: invertebrates

grian: tropical birds

joel: australia house (koalas wombats and such)

impulse: hoofed savanna animals (zebras gazelles giraffes etc)?

skizz: apes/monkeys?

i dont watch imp or skizz much, so if anyone has better ideas for them, or any other hermits listed, id love to hear it:D

[llamagoddessofficial]

i love the good aquarium au! i want to see the fishes happy 🩷o🩷 How do the sirens interact with mc in this version? 🩷

Sans: He has to wait much longer than his bad AU counterpart to get to 'play' with her. This aquarium is very safety-focused, and unwilling to have anyone even near his open tank, let alone in it. Despite his obvious obsession and courting displays, Mc remains safely behind thick barriers and high out of his reach- the only chance he'll get is if he proves he can behave, and Mc herself is the one who approaches management about the subject of swimming with him.

Her presence clearly has benefits on him, so she spends a lot of time on his shifts, talking to him from up on the railings or entertaining him through the glass, sometimes just doing homework by the dappled blue light of his tank. He does occasionally attempt to pull her into the water, whether he's breaching and knocking the railing or grabbing a feeding pole and yanking it (in the hopes of yanking her in with it)... but he's always unsuccessful.

It gives them time to get to know one another more. Time for him to mellow, realise that just because she leaves when her shift is over doesn't mean she won't come back. Time, so that when they do finally make physical contact, it's a gentle and mutual experience that leaves him feeling like things in his world are going to be okay.

Red: Again, poor Red has to wait a lot longer in this AU to get to swim with his girlfriend. But not as long as Sans. Since Red's so well behaved with humans, his keepers interact with him a lot more closely (albeit while wearing plenty of hand and arm protection), giving him lots of chances to flirt with her close-up. He gets many more opportunities than Sans to show that he can behave with her; though 'behaving' still includes grabbing her butt if she lets her guard down too long.

... In this AU, the aquarium knows Red considers her his mate. Mc does too. After she was suddenly hired, the first thing management did was put her on a pretty intense and in-depth learning course. Now even if he's flirting like a siren she knows exactly what's going on. Initially, it made the aquarium cautious about letting her swim with him- but since he's never going to be released, it might be alright after all. It does make life easier when it comes to things like giving him medicine; he doesn't bite when it's his mate doing the medical checkup.

Skull: Mc ends up interacting physically with Skull a lot sooner than anyone intended. At first, there was obviously zero contact thanks to his kill, she'd only even THINK of interacting physically with Skull if she was completely confident he'd never hurt her. And that kind of confidence would only come from a long while working with him, perhaps years.

... Thing is. He's a clever boy, he wants Mc's affection. And he won't wait years. He makes a 'hobby' out of breaking security measures and pulling her into the tank- at first it's a terrifying incident, but as it happens over and over, it loses its shock value and becomes something of an in-joke at the aquarium. Especially since he never actually does anything... just pulls her in, cuddles her, then politely sets her back on the side of the tank like nothing happened. No matter what they do, Skull just finds increasingly more and more complicated and innovative ways to snatch her into his pool.

Eventually, they can clearly see he's not going to kill her- and they decide it's probably just easier for everyone if she interacts with him in person. He's going to grab her anyway, may as well let him do it before he finds a way to break every security measure they have.

[septimus-heap]

I truly believe marcia likes snakes btw. I knoww its just the shoes but I think they r her favourite animal and she knows Everything abt them. When she first was getting the python shoes she kept correcting Terry Tarsal on how he was keeping the snake until he just insisted she set up and organise its enclosure+meal schedule and such. And she did. Very happily. She has a pet snake eventually when she's retired <3

[kanbleu]

Okay stupid idea I know and idk if anyone else made this with their own characters but…

Alien zoo keeper/babysitter/tamer au

[amezure]

Vet / Zoo Keeper AU🦜Support me on PATREON 🦚

[the-kr8tor]

REQUEST

Y'know, Hobie n R hit the boombahya, now the twins are getting a li'l bro? :3

The twins could be like, 4-5 years old now, maybe?

Yeesss new baby alert!! Thank you, roze ❤️

Pairing: Hobie Brown x fem! Reader/ Spider-Punk x fem! Reader

Word count: 2.1k

Tags: No use of Y/N, no specific physical description of the reader, mom! Reader, dad! Hobie, Billie and Ramona AU, Twin AU, dad AU, fluff

ʕ⁠·⁠ᴥ⁠·⁠ʔ

Hobie's nervous, and it's not because he's scared for you because you're in labour and actively pushing out a whole new human being, that was hours ago, all the blood and sweat have been wiped clean and the baby now presumably sleeps in your arms. And it's not because he's scared of having a new kid, he's way past that phase thanks to your help. No, it's not because of those things why his hands are so clammy, he's scared whether or not his girls, his first babies will get along with the new addition to the family. Especially when they wanted a baby sister.

He flicks his eyes upwards towards the rearview mirror to check on the girls. Their legs dangle off the car seat that they've quickly outgrown. They should be out of it in a few years, but he's sure he won't be ready to face the fact that the squishy cheeked babies he used to carry around all time are now eight years old with their long legs they both inherited from him. The new baby car seat sits between them, all shiny and new, awaiting the new baby.

They eat their chips and ice cream happily, a little treat he bought for them to soften the blow of the news. Ramona hums a tune, a nervous habit of hers. Her, or your cardigan for the matter sits largely on her frame, sparkly trainers shining in the early morning light. While Billie eats her ice cream cone like she hasn't eaten in days. Like Mona, she also sports one of your jackets, a frilly one that you used to wear back when you and Hobie were just friends. They clearly miss you after just a couple of days in hospital.

Hobie unclasps his seat belt, twisting around his seat to speak to them, like a zoo keeper facing lions, he gingerly takes a chip, waiting for their protest.

“Dad!” Billie reacts first, “I was eating that.”

“And I bought it.” He annoyingly chews to lighten the mood.

Mona lifts her eyes from her melting ice cream to her dad. Always the more perceptive one, she senses his nerves. “Is mum okay?” Her tone makes Billie take a whole 180 on her emotions.

“What– why would she not be okay?” Billie turns to her dad, tone soft and clearly terrified at the thoughts rolling in her mind. “Dad, mum is okay, right?”

“She's fine, Mac,” He can see the relief on their faces. “just— she's knackered, pushing the baby out tired was hard, so can you two promise me that you'll be extra careful with her and the baby?”

They look at each other for a second before nodding. “Okay,” they say simultaneously. Hobie's used to their synchronization.

“Good,” he pats both of their knees. “Ready to head out and meet your sibling?”

“Yes!” Billi exclaims, the ‘s’ sound prolonged.

Mona finishes her ice cream in one gulp, brain freeze evident on her face. The same expression you get whenever you bite into your ice cream. He can't wait to see you too, it's only been a few hours since he left your side but it feels like a year.

Wincing, Mona smiles, showing off her dimples and pearly whites. “I'm good!”

“Let's go then.” Hobie doesn't need to help them with their car seat, but it doesn't mean that he doesn't miss it. All he does now is open and close the doors for them, he feels all nostalgic. He hopes he gets the same feeling when his boy gets the same age as his girls.

Locking the car, Billie skips ahead while Mona takes her dad's hand wordlessly. “Bee!” She yells after her sister. “Look both ways!”

Billie stops in her tracks to check her left and right. Then she tosses a thumbs up behind her, continuing her way towards the entrance of the hospital.

“D’you think we need a leash for your sister?” He tuge at Mona's hand jokingly.

“Leashes aren't nice, dad, they hinder us from our freedom to move around.” She says seriously, or as seriously a eight year old can sound like.

“That's my girl.” Hobie grins down.

“Learned from the best.” She beams up at him, he can't believe that she grew up looking more like you when everyone thought she looked like him when she was a baby. “Aunty Yuri taught me that.”

Hobie scrunches his nose. “You ruined it, cheese.” She clearly knows what she's doing based on her cheeky grin. He's her kid alright.

“Dad! Elevator!” Billie, in her blue overalls, holds the elevator doors open. “Hurry!” She stomps her foot impatiently.

“Alright, we're comin’” Entering the elevator, Billie seems to be jumping all over the walls. Maybe he shouldn't have given them ice cream.

Her eyes flit over the various medical posters inside the elevator, feet unconsciously doing a little dance.

Mona tugs at Hobie's hand, beaded bracelets clinking against each other. “You look knackered, dad.” His heart melts.

Patting her head, Hobie's hand is big enough to cover her entire head. Her curls stick out in-between his fingers and the ribbons she hastily tied around her hair. “I am, dovey. But I'll be alright, mum and my babies come first, yeah?”

“But who'll take care of you?” Her eyes gloss over. Billie heard the conversation through her fog of excitement. She holds the sleeve of Hobie's leather jacket like she always does when she's unsure.

He whispers, hands on both of their heads. “I'm Spiderman, innit? If I can handle lizard on my worst day, I can handle this.”

Mona thinks for a second. She smiles once she gets an idea. “Then we'll watch over you then!”

“Mm-hmm!” Billie agrees, “Like mum always does!”

Hobie would've embraced his girls until he lets all his love for them out, but the ring of the doors opening cuts him off. With a sniff, he feels the tears behind his eyes once again.

“You two are already better at this than me,” he softly says as he leads them out of the lift. He has no idea why he worried so much.

Walking past the nurse’s station, both of his babies are holding each of his hands now, hopping and skipping happily. Their curls bounce cutely, getting a nurse’s attention. Hobie recognizes her as one of the nurses that attended to you.

“You two are adorable!” She coos, “d’you girls want a lolly?” Shaking a jar full of colourful lollipops, surprisingly, the girls shake their heads.

“No, thank you, Mum and dad said to not accept any candies from strangers.” Mona puffs out her chest bravely. Her sister agrees, nodding along to her words.

Hobie chuckles whilst the nurse does the same. “It's alright, love, I know her, go take some.” He urges them, still a tad apprehensive, Billie takes one for the team, taking two lollies. Yellow for her, and green for Mona.

“Wait! What about the baby?” Mona exclaims,

Billie knits her eyebrows.

“I don't think your baby brother is allowed to have a lolly yet.” The nurse, naive to what she just revealed, returns back to her desk.

“What?!” They crane their neck up incredibly fast, shock on their faces, letting go of their dad's hand like they've been betrayed.

Hobie's ready to mitigate any tantrums, mouth opening to explain, the twins’ grins grow larger (and cuter) making their dad go through a rollercoaster of emotions.

“We have a baby brother?” Mona says giddily.

“Told you it would work!” Billie takes her sister's hand, bouncing up and down.

“What would work?” Hobie has never been more confused when it comes to his daughters.

“Reverse psychology!” They both speak at the same time.

“We keep saying that we want a baby sister but we actually wanted a brother! Now we've tricked mummy's belly to have a boy instead of a girl!” Billie explains like it's the most obvious thing in the world.

Hobie doesn't have the heart to tell them that it doesn't work that way. He lets them be, guiding them towards your room as they celebrate their so-called win.

He smiles at them, nodding along. “Yeah, that's great, love— look at that we're here.” Knocking once, he opens the door with a creak.

Billie and Ramona stop from hopping around, peeking inside, they see you sitting up on the bed cradling a bundle of blue blanket.

You smile, shoulders sagging and finally able to relax. Eyes glistening from the mere sight of them alone, (you blame your hormones) you beckon them over.

“My babies,” you softly say, sniffing.

The distinct smell of disinfectant and clean linen immediately has Hobie on dad mode. He remembers the day the girls were born, all shaky legs and clammy hands as the doctor hands them over to him for the first time. Now he has one more bundle to carry, and now he's much more ready and experienced, yet his legs are still wobbly, and his hands are still sweaty. It's like he's back when he first carried his son even though it was just a few hours ago.

He guides Billie and Mona towards your bed, hands on their back, whispering to them. “Indoor voices, mac and cheese. We don't want to scare your brother.”

“Okay.” Mona nods. “Hi, mum, hi little brother.” She softly says, and you scooch to make space for them both on the bed so they could see him better. Mona lifts up her leg carefully, sitting down by your side, planting her face on your bicep. Eyes wide, she holds your hand where you hold your son's tiny leg. “He looks so much like dad. Especially his eyes.” Voice even softer now, you kiss her temple as thanks for being gentle.

Billie has a harder time though, Hobie senses her nerves, whether it's his spidey senses or his dad's intuition, he just knows. Billie is definitely nervous by how she bounces on the balls of her feet, and wrings her hands. He hasn't seen her this anxious since her first recital.

Hobie crouches down, hand on her shoulder, soothing her by mere touch alone. “You alright, Bee?” You watch the interaction in the corner of your eye. Mind still a bit foggy, body still aching, you'd help if not for those feelings.

“Will the baby like me?” She timidly asks her dad, frown deepening on her lips. “What if he hates me?”

“Impossible, angel.” Hobie rubs her back, “he listened to your voice while he was still in mum's belly, and he always moved and wiggled around whenever he heard you. I know he loves you, just like how your mum and I knew that you and Mona would love each other.”

Billie, still his little girl, hugs him right on the spot. Little arms wrapped around his neck, nerves melting off her. Just like how Hobie used to do, he lifts her up, carrying her to your bed.

She sits down right next to her sister, frown immediately gone the moment she lays her eyes on her brother. “He’s so fat.” Giggling, Billie looks at you with the same adoration. “You made him fat, mum.”

You beam at her, you'd embrace both of them if your hands aren't occupied by the sleeping newborn. “It’s because of all the bread and pasta I ate.” Billie and Mona laugh softly, continuing to coo at their brother. Billie sniffs at the blanket, whispering something that sounds like ‘new baby smell.’

Tilting your head at Hobie, eyes tender, you smile at him. Grinning back, he holds your head, placing a heavy kiss on your forehead.

“I was the one who made you all that pasta and bread, you blamin’ me, love?” He says the joke against your temple.

“I'm feeling nice today, so I'm blaming us both. I blame my cravings and I blame you for indulging me.” Moving your head without moving your body to not disturb the baby, (which was a challenge,) you pucker your lips, waiting for him to move. “Told you they'd love him.”

“I should've never doubted you.” With a dramatic sigh, he leans down to kiss you properly.

Now for the next challenge, naming their son. Billie and Mona are already whispering ideas, which includes names ranging from their favourite cartoon characters to even naming them after their uncles. You and Hobie watch on while the baby sleeps soundly, and while your girls argue quietly.

[lvndrcrow]

TMA AU where Jon is a bird keeper at a zoo and Martin frequently goes there to draw animals for his art studies aka the jonmartin zoo au

(i have another comic in the works of this au so.. expect it soon hehehehehh)

(I’ve talked about this au on my twitter but i’ll probably rewrite what i said over there here aswell)

[wulvercazz]

🐆Zookeeper AU🐆

Reposting this AU in full, writing and all💕 This one was first posted back in January of 2021 😵‍💫✨ Hope u enjoy~!

❗️CW- slight Terato, Grimm has a ✨uterus✨, Monsters treated like animals

Inspo for this- Olmec Mythology (Were-Jaguar myth), Lionesses that grow manes, and lots of feral-themed songs~💕

Ichigo is a keeper at a cryptozoo (basically a zoo for mythical creatures or beasts from legends) Their most recent addition is Grimmjow, a male were-jaguar gifted to their reserve by México; very aggressive, and wary of people. And Ichigo is his designated main caretaker.

Were-jaguars were described in stories as impossible creatures, with jaguar features and human bodies; the species as it’s known today is very similar in temperament to a common jaguar, but far more intelligent and aggressive to humans. Males and females are pretty similar in build, but the males have manes that make them easier to identify.

Ichigo really likes the were-jaguar; he can’t get too close when feeding him, but while Grimm is eating, he gets to watch from outside his enclosure. Then he can truly admire its beauty. It’s a shame that creatures like him become myths for their fear of humans, lose their habitats and source of food because of them.

They have an arrangement with another cryptozoo a few states away. they’ll get their were-jaguars together to hopefully start breeding. All in hopes to increase their species numbers from their dangerously low count, captive bred were-jaguars aren’t very common either.

So Ichigo is tasked with socializing Grimmjow; he is extra careful, extra patient. Grimm is shy, Ichigo finds; always running away the second he sets foot inside the enclosure. But the  aggression doesn’t stop, were he to come too close; specially when food is involved.

Slowly, every day, and being careful to use exactly the same vest every time he comes into the enclosure (lest he lose the familiar scent), Ichigo stays a little longer. Calm, unthreatening. Eventually, Grimmjow comes out of his shell; gets a little closer, glares a little less and is comfortable enough to even close his eyes a bit and enjoy the sun in his presence. Ichigo is delighted about his progress.

Until one day Grimmjow jumps him.

For a few seconds, Ichigo thinks that’s it; he read it all wrong and now this creature was going to rip him apart. Except Grimm instead starts grooming him. Opening his lethal jaws and, with menacing fangs closer to his eyes than Ichigo is comfortable with, gently biting his face, then rubbing his cheek all over it. Ichigo is freaking out, okay? So maybe Grimmjow likes him now, great, but those teeth are still on his face.

The other keepers find it hilarious though; their faces going red and purple from holding their laughter for too long. 

“... help ...” Ichigo mouths at them as Grimmjow continues to purr and croon away. 

Eventually, they do help him out, all while giggling like idiots— right until their laughter annoys Grimmjow enough for him to hiss and scare them off. After that, it becomes their new normal. Ichigo has to stay a couple minutes every time he comes in, while the were-jaguar rubs his face on him and tangles his hair with his sand-paper tongue.

They even test it out once, someone else tries getting near the enclosure: it’s back to aggressive, scary jaguar; and Ichigo is very proud to be the one to have befriended the creature.  They schedule the meeting with the other zoo’s were-jaguar.

When the day comes, and Grimmjow meets the other creature, Ichigo fights the need to bite his nails. He really hopes Grimm will be nice to her. They sniff at each other, they seem a bit wary, but otherwise not aggressive. It takes them a while to settle down, and Grimmjow even appears to be interested. It seems to be going well, even! The female lays, submissive, as Grimmjow gets up from his spot and on top of her, even bites her neck a little in a show off dominance—  but then nothing.

Grimmjow walks far away, apparently done with whatever he wanted to do, and lays in a corner. Any more attempts after that to make them interact are met with more disinterest from both parts. It’s a pity. They’ll find another female, maybe.

Ichigo continues his work as usual, and Grimmjow still meets him with the same animosity, the same kitten-like playfulness. It’s all fun and games until Grimm starts grunting one day, as soon as he comes in; rolling around like a house-cat and eventually presenting his ass, tail up and huffing and grunting like he was desperate for Ichigo to get the hint. OH, DID HE SUDDENLY GET IT.

Grimmjow was... not a male. Somehow had a mane and all— but not. a. MALE. And he’d somehow decided that Ichigo was an appropriate mate. How did no one realize? How did the vets not realize? Ichigo practically runs out of there, and into the offices to get (more like demand) some answers.

Apparently, their veterinary team had tried to do a full check up, like they always do. But Grimmjow was so stressed that the adrenalin completely burned through the anesthetic, scared the vets and even almost hurt one of them. So in the end they decided to leave the little details like his sex as ‘obvious on sight’. With Ichigo’s help now, though, they are finally able to do a proper check up.

Ichigo administers the anesthetic, and stays in the room so Grimm can smell him. Turns out, he really isn’t male. Just as Ichigo theorized; but a female with a high amount of testosterone. Enough to give Grimmjow the mane and temperament of a male. 

They do eventually find another were-jaguar for breeding. Now that they know they should look for a male instead, does make it easier. Ichigo even gets the privilege to help with any future cubs. That doesn’t stop Grimmjow from trying to woo Ichigo again, though ~🌿

Ichigo is a little jealous, but only because it’s ridiculous how these jaguar-creatures have a far more exciting sex life than him.

Grimmjow for his part just enjoys the ride, even if he plays really hard to get. Can’t have them believing they can one up him just like that. He’ll get rid of them as soon as the deed is done. 

And surely enough, soon the zoo learns Grimm is pregnant; and all the staff is incredibly excited. Ichigo is sure this means he’ll have to distance himself, he’s aware of Were-jaguar’s lonely natures, and how protective they are of their young. It was already a miracle how close he could get to Grimmjow as is; would that mean he’d be allowed to stay now that he was carrying? Probably not. Much less knowing Grimmjow saw him as a male rather than a mere human.

To his surprise, however, that didn’t happen at all. He’d been instructed to be more cautious now, leave his food and get back out instead of hanging around like he used to. He tried to do that. He really did. But he took one step outside and Grimmjow yowled like he’d killed someone dear to him. The sight of it was much worse. He was staring at him with big sad eyes, wondering why Ichigo was abandoning him. Orders be damned, he was getting back in there.

Surely enough, the moment he stepped inside this time Grimmjow immediately jumped on him, holding his face close and chuffing contentedly as he rubbed his whole face on his hair. Ichigo couldn’t help but laugh when from outside Rukia (a coworker) tried to remind him he was not supposed to do that anymore. It was all words anyways, she was quickly squealing at the adorable scene and taking pictures for the zoo’s office wall.

And it stayed like that for the following months too. Especially when Grimmjow was closer to delivery and wobbled more than walked; demanding every day after his check-ups for Ichigo to stay longer and rub his belly to ease the ache.

Two adorable cubs; rambunctious from the second they could open their eyes and explore around. And once more, Ichigo was personally invited by Grimmjow himself to be present the whole time. And most check ups were done by him or in his presence, if only to keep Grimm calm; he still didn’t trust other humans too much.

When the public could finally meet the cubs, it took barely a couple days for them to become a fan favorite even before being properly named. Ayumi and Kaito💕

Extra; a couple extra designs I did for monsters on this AU💕

[mrghostrat]

Omg AU careers, you get it. I love chef/baker Crowley solely for him getting to feed Aziraphale. I love vet/zoo-keeper Aziraphale for his kindness to living things including snakes. It’s not just about the characters fitting into their careers (because hey we as people don’t always love our jobs). It’s sometimes so much more about what it brings out in them for the other character to bounce off of and love

YEAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!

[aerknight]

MOON SNAKE IS DONE sun design is here <3 au ramble under the cut

To answer naff about the storyline of the au if they happen to see this...

I don't wanna give too much away, but you are a gift shop worker at a Freddys that's basically a zoo (if zoos were 20% animal and 80% tourist trap) for strange/mythical creatures. A kid drops a plush into the Naga exhibit and you are the only employee available. You retrieve it with no problem and stump the other keepers who are like. wtf?? how are you alive?? there are giant angry snakes in there who have maimed people?? Things only get weirder from there. B) Ya know, the usual corporate takes advantage of its employees and stuff. The relationship between you and the snake bois is also completely platonic because I will die for platonic love and I don't see it enough in DCA fandom. v_v

Also, I was pleased to see someone guess the morph patterns on Sun's design! (Albino/Piebald) Moon's might be a little harder... he has three different patterns at work.

I have an Eclipse design, but I can't show it because it would give away a major plot point reee.

[3-pots-of-soup]

lil zoo keeper au fic:D im not great at writing dialogue and such, so apologies if you cringe + any feedback/constructive criticism is appreciated!!

wc: 663

tw: non

ships: non

Pearl’s day was off to an awful start; first she’d slept through her alarm, making her rush through her morning routine, then discovered her roommate and half brother Grian had drunken the last of the coffee. “This day *cannot* get worse.” Pearl said mid traffic jam.

Her day, could, in fact, get far worse.

She arrived to work thankfully on time and began her trek to the invertebrate house, on the other side of the zoo; she was so excited for the construction on the north entrance to finish.

When Pearl finally entered the invert house she was immediately greeted by loud chirping and a very frantic Mumbo “PEARL PEARL!! THE GRASSHOPPERS GOT OUT!!”

“WHAT DO YOU *MEAN* THE GRASSHOPPERS GOT OUT?!”

“I MEAN THEY HAVE ESCAPED THEIR ENCLOSURE AND. THEY. ARE. *EVERYWHERE*.”

As Pearl took in her surroundings she found that her coworker was right. The grasshoppers were indeed *everywhere*. “The zoo opens in under a half hour what do we do?” She asked in a panic.

“Scoop them up?” Mumbo suggested hesitantly.

“And put them where? It’ll take hours if we do it pick them up and put them back in the tank one by one- hold on how did they even get out in the first place?” Pearl questioned.

“Er, I might have forgotten to close their tank properly after I fed them last night.” Mumbo squeaked out.

Pearl stared at him blankly for a few seconds, then spun on her heel and began walking out of the building “Wait where are you going?” Mumbo asked in a panicked tone “Please Please don’t leave me alone with this disaster!!”

“Don’t worry, I’ll be back in a few, I’ve got a plan!” And with that Pearl bolted out the door

As quick as she could Pearl ran towards the nearest drink stand “CUPS!” She shouted

“What?” Replied the bewildered employee

“ANIMAL ESCAPE I NEED CUPS WITH LIDS!”

The employee, name badge reading ‘Shelby S.’ responded by quickly grabbing a small stack of plastic cups and a small stack of lids for them “this enough?” She asked

“That’s perfect thank you!” Pearl said grabbing the cups and racing back to the invert house. She returned to a sign on the door in rather poor handwriting that read ‘Building not opem’. When she attempted to open the door she found that it was locked, and when she reached down to grab her keys, she found that the carabiner that normally held them, along with her id, was gone “dammmnn ittt.” She groaned, dragging her words, and began to bang on the doors.

It was only a minute or so until she saw Mumbo race over one hand in a gentle fist, hurriedly opening the door to let her in “what’s in your hand?” Pearl questioned once inside

“A grasshopper.” Her friend replied.

“Here” said Pearl, rolling her eyes and placing a cup in his free hand “you can put a few in here, toss the lid on, and once we have a few cups, we can put them back in their tank all at once.”

“Have I ever mentioned you’re a genius?”

“Yes, but you could certainly do it more often; now let’s get bug catching!” With that the duo spent the next hour or so running about catching grasshoppers.

“I really don’t get why they keep the feeder insects in here and not in houses where they’re used.” Mumbo commented from his spot on the floor

“I agree, but I suppose it makes sense to keep all the colonies in one space, and if they have to be kept in one place, I can see the logic behind putting them with the other bugs, still, sucks *we* have to deal with them.” Pearl said, laughing a bit, “now up you get! We have to open this place up, there’s still like,” Pearl checked her watch and groaned “*eight hours* till closing.”

“Alright, alright” Mumbo sighed, pulling himself up “let’s unlock those doors.”

That’s all i have atm, my plan for the au is to write one-shots for various povs:D might have some shipping here and there (mumscarian my beloved) but it won’t be the focus! Again any/all feed back welcome, and thanks for reading!!!!

-🥘

[llamagoddessofficial]

Hey Llama, since we saw what a good aquarium is like, how about zoo siren au if the aquarium was actually competent and good? :D

aka-indulgence more like aka-ingulGENIUS

Sans: This AU would probably make the biggest difference to dearly beloved orca boy. Our cute monochromatic sociopath has a dizzyingly large pool with plenty of room to move and depth to dive into, plenty of natural lighting from big windows and fresh air pumped from outside, a constantly rotated array of complex toys to pull apart. But most importantly, humans don't closely interact with him. The aquarium can tell he's angry, and doesn't want anyone near him- so for both their safety and his peace of mind staff interact with him exclusively through sheets of thick glass or from high walkways far out of his reach.

This has left them with a siren who still launches attacks when he can (like breaching to try and hit the walkway), but has never successfully killed anyone. And the biggest difference is he's only attacking out of momentary flashes of frustration. He's not planning murders far in advance, like his abused counterpart- he's just losing his temper. He's generally quite content.

Even more so when he meets his darling keeper.

Red: We have a very happy shark on our hands!

A big tank, full of swarms of little fish and actual live coral instead of just fake fibreglass, he's got one of those winding shark tunnels beneath his enclosure that kids love to run through. He delights in the excited expressions on their faces when he glides over their heads, and he likes being 'chased' around the tank... lots of cute viral videos of him blowing bubbles at children, or sneaking up behind an unsuspecting adult and scaring the shit out of them.

The aquarium tried to wean him off his affinity for people. It didn't work. Unfortunately, that means he can't really ever be released, in case he approaches swimmers and gets himself hunted- so now they indulge his fixation on humans for enrichment purposes.

The main difference for this Red is how he bites. He still bites keepers, But they're warnings for getting too close, nothing with malicious intent... he hasn't removed any fingers, he's still very popular with staff for his big personality. You can't help but love him.

Skull: Since Sans is happy pulling apart his toys instead of staff, Skull is arguably the most dangerous siren in this AU. Not much changes about him, really, despite the far better environment; he's got a lovely deep dark tank and a much bigger den to hide in, but he's still known for tucking away rather than approaching the crowds.

... And he's still a killer.

He's the only siren who's successfully killed someone in this AU. Ironically, the fact that it's only one death makes him seem even scarier, and his repeated attempts all the more jarring. If it weren't for the strict safety protocols that were enforced after the first death he likely would've killed again. Unlike their 'bad au' counterpart, this aquarium isn't nearly as willing to throw Mc into his tank to pacify him- in fact, they're not willing at all. Putting Mc within tentacle's reach of this behemoth seems to be the last thing they want to do.

... But if it keeps him calm, and stops him attacking...

[le-sluagh]

#3 Incorrect Batman: Vigilante (My AU)

Harley Quinn: What time is it?

Joker: I don't know; pass me that kazoo and we'll find out

Joker: *Plays kazoo extremely loud*

Two Face: WHO THE FUCK IS PLAYING KAZOO AT TWO IN THE MORNING

Joker: It's 2 am

*****

Two Face: You were stabbed. Do you remember anything?

Poison Ivy: Only the ambulance ride to the hospital.

Two Face: That wasn't an ambulance, Harley Drove you.

Poison Ivy: But I heard a siren.

Joker: That was Harley.

Harley Quinn: Sorry, I got nervous.

*****

Riddler: I swear to god I'm the only one here with a braincell.

Two Face, Joker, Harley Quinn, and Poison Ivy, sarcastically: ALL HAIL the keeper of the sacred braincell!

*****

Two Face: Never going to a meeting of the Legion of Doom again. Riddler started his argument with "Riddle me this".

*****

Robin: *running towards Batman with open arms*

Batman: *moves out of the way*

Robin: Hey, why'd you move?!

Batman: I thought you were going to attack me.

Robin: I was going to hug you!

Batman: Why would you hug me?

Robin: WHY WOULD I ATTACK YOU!?

*****

*Comments under an image of a really hot knife cutting bread*

Joker: Imagine stabbing someone with this knife.

Poison Ivy: It would instantly cauterize the wound, so the person wouldn't bleed, so it's not very useful.

Two Face: if you want information it is

Harley Quinn: why would you STAB a person when you can have TOAST?

*****

Zoom: Your internet connection is unstable.

Two Face: You should see my life.

*****

*at a zoo*

Joker: What are they in for?

Lex Luthor: Joker, this isn't prison.

Joker: So they can leave?

Lex Luthor: No, but-

Joker, pointing at a meerkat: I bet that one murdered someone.

*****

Two Face: FIGHT ME, YOU NERD ASS SLUT!

Riddler: At least try to sound slightly more sophisticated when you threaten someone.

Harvey Dent: Oh, I'm sorry. I should ask; dost thou want to engage in a duel, my good bitch?

Riddler: Somehow that's worse.

*****

Mr. Freeze: Well you see, the explanation is perfectly simple and scientific. It was because shut up. Shut up is why.

[bidisasterevankinard]

Tease tidbit Tuesday

trying to write again and fall into 911 madness so more from the enemies to lovers singers au

Eddie closes the door and Buck waits several seconds before he hears the door next to him closes and runs to block his, before falling on the floor, and starts crying. He hugs his knees, hiding into his legs and bites his jeans not to let anyone hear who he breaks because his heart one more time wasn’t seen and needed.

He was given it into the wrong hands he thought were reaching to grab it, only for it to fall like a glass vase on the floor, and become shiny millions of sparkling shards all over the floor.

The shards dig into his skin, punishing him with constant aching pain for his stupidity. For the fact that he constantly falls in love with people who just look in his direction, and he is ready to run to them like a loyal dog, until they send him away.

He has been thinking both he and Eddie are falling in love, even if he wasn’t completely sure, but he hoped he was right. He believed all those conversations, songs together, Eddie’s support during the mess with Ian, their beer nights and trips to zoo with Chris, constant messaging to each other meant something deeper not only for him.

He was wrong.

Eddie sees him as a friend and Buck needs to one more time pick up from the floor his broken heart, when he stands up, and try to move on from Eddie.

Starting from writing another song. About his pain. 

He needs to put it somewhere, and music is the perfect place and keeper of the pain. He hopes it will save him at least from some pain taking the worst one into perfect lyrics.

tagging @wikiangela @wildlife4life @watchyourbuck @rogerzsteven @elvensorceress @evanbegins @eddiebabygirldiaz @the-likesofus @thewolvesof1998 @theotherbuckley @transboybuckley @underwater-ninja-13 @puppyboybuckley @pirrusstuff @aspecbuddie @spaceprincessem @spotsandsocks @spagheddiediaz @devirnis @dangerpronebuddie @diazsdimples @daffi-990 @fortheloveofbuddie @giddyupbuck @heartshapedvows @hippolotamus @honestlydarkprincess @hoodie-buck @jesuisici33 @loserdiaz @cal-daisies-and-briars @bigfootsmom @buck-coded @buddierights @bekkachaos @mandzuking17 @sunshinediaz @smilingbuckley @steadfastsaturnsrings @tizniz @911onabc and anyone who wants to

[amezure]

Vet / Zoo Keeper AU 🦉Support me on PATREON 🐯