#mostly i think a lot of people followed me and then realized oh shit he's annoying so they noped out

[scaramutuals]

moved to @scaramutual

HI HI HELLO this is a terrible hour to post this i know. new blog is waayyy more informal but I felt like i got a lot of followers here really fast and I haven't had the chance to really talk to anyone properly SO. if you want to see me around more maybe check out the new blog

I'll still be here for a good while & I'll be slowly following mutuals. mute tag if you don't want to see this post anymore woo

[amvpk01]

PATHETIC YANDERE

unwanted obsession

when obsession goes beyond admiration, it turns into repulsion and the search for love becomes a path of rejection.

cw: f!reader, non-con, obsession, rejection, violence, stalking, humiliation, kidnapping, manipulation, murder

masterlist || next

Can you imagine someone who is completely useless at everything they do? There's no such thing as good grades, good looks, popularity, or even a good personality. He was a complete shit and he knew it.

It was just another day of him going to school, doing assignments that most of the time the teacher would point out were wrong just to embarrass him in front of the class or that the handwriting was illegible, talking to his pathetic friends just like him, buying something in the canteen and sitting on the benches to eat and look around judging the people.

It was Thursday so it was more crowded than the other days, some familiar faces and others not so much, but someone on the other side of the courtyard surprised him.

A girl with h/c hair and e/c eyes, a pretty face, and a sexy body.

He wondered how someone as beautiful and charming as that could exist. Were you new to the school or did he just not notice you before?

"-Are you there? Dude?? Hello?! Are you listening to me you piece-"

"Calm down bro-"

"Her name?" He interrupted his friends.

"Uh- Who?"

"Pink shirt." The friends looked at the aforementioned girl.

"Don't know, but Giovanna's talking to her, maybe you can ask?"

"...I thought I'd die before I saw you like a girl!"

"Quiet! So fucking noisy. What if she heard you?!"

"Don't worry. It's just that it always crossed my mind that you would be... you know, gay?"

He didn't mind the homophobic comments or the pats on the back along with the laughter of his friends. All that went through his mind was how he was going to get close to you.

You couldn't help but admire your purple nails that matched your fit. It was already a habit of yours to match clothes along with accessories and painted nails. No matter the occasion, you'll ALWAYS be pretty and stylish.

"[Name]?" You looked in the direction of the voice.

"Hi, Gigi! You good?" Noticing her face made you worried. "What's wrong?"

"Well, do you know about some guy who texted you yesterday?"

"Huh, no? All my notifications are off."

"Looks like some guy from my class keeps saying you're ghosting him on DM."

"Oh. My bad, it was not my intention. I think I'll see about that later." You wondered what that guy wanted to talk about. Maybe was someone you already know?

He couldn't believe it that you didn't block him. He thought you had ghosted him but it was just a misunderstanding?!?

'Thanks God... Now I need to talk with her.'

It's been a few weeks since he had the courage and ask you to talk. Every day you exchanged greetings and had long talks that were mostly started by him. You tried to find him attractive or like his personality but nothing worked. Maybe because you already knew his intentions?

But there's something that has been bothering you. Maybe it's just your mind trying to delude you but you swear that someone's stalking you.

And your instinct is telling you that's him even though you don't have proof. You did see a lot of pictures of you on his phone but didn't think he would start to follow you on your way home.

So today you're gonna find out if it's him or not!

You made your usual way home, but you diverted your path to another street that had more shops. Your stalker follows behind you, his face all covered by a stupid black mask and sunglasses.

Maybe you should enter the first shop that you see to know if he would enter too?

Without wasting time, you run into a lingerie store and try to hide further into the store. The stranger only realized the type of store when he put one foot inside, his covered face flushed with embarrassment, and then decided to wait for you outside.

'Damnit! He didn't enter?!' Your thoughts were pure anger and disappointment but vanished when some lady came asking for what type of lingerie you were searching for. Then you got why he didn't.

'NO. NO. NO. NO. JUST NO. DON'T TELL ME SHE'S BUYING LINGERIE TO USE WITH SOMEONE ELSE! SHE SAID SHE HAD NO BOYFRIEND. BUT WHAT IF SHE'S SEEING SOMEONE?!?' He started hyperventilating and his disguise was only making his breathing worse.

After waiting 5 minutes, you come out with a bag in your hands and then speed up your walk. He couldn't lose you from his sight. In his point of view, he was protecting you.

You surely have been running fast, are you embarrassed by someone seeing you in this type of store?

FUCK, DID HE JUST LOST YOU?!??

Surely he saw you walking around that corner-

Oh no...

It feels like you're leaning against the wall just waiting for him. In a fast move, you pulled away his mask. Not being able to hide your disgusted face.

"...What the fuck?"

"Wait- I-I can explain!! It's j-just a misunderstanding! I s-swear! Please, let me-"

"...That's so fucking creepy dude...

If I knew you were like this, I would just ignore you from the start...

Maybe I shouldn't listen to my friends."

He was disturbed that he didn't mind you running away from that place. How could he be so dumb to fall for such a trick? Now, you won't ever talk to him again. Just the fact that he scared you hurt him so much.

You were so kind and pure to him like an angel, and he felt like a demon knowing that you would never want to see him again.

A week has passed since the incident, and he hasn't gone to school, much less left the house. He didn't dare to even see you. Your disgusted face was already haunting him but there's something that he didn't notice before.

'Maybe I shouldn't listen to my friends.'

What did you mean by that? Did your friends tell you about him or something? His phone was getting many notifications, then he decided to pick it up.

A party? Seriously? He wasn't in the mood for this, but locking himself in his home isn't going to make anything better.

He hopes that you go too so he can apologize for his past behavior.

In his own way.

You were relieved, there was no sight of him in school. Mostly like he was who was hiding and not you. You didn't know if he ever felt sorry, after all, you blocked him from everything leaving him with no opportunity to speak and you didn't see him everywhere. Thanks God.

But nothing more than a wonderful party to raise your mood.

If you only know what would happen after this.

part 2 (in progress)

[liverpool-enjoyer]

hey yall forewarning this is easily the most embarrassing post ive ever made on here. like im not talking normal levels of tumblr cringe/oversharing, i mean youre probly gonna judge me and think somethings genuinely wrong with me. but i really need to get it off my chest so. yolo.

also tldr at the end in case you wanna spare yourself lmao.

mkay so recently i havent been online, because ive been really sad. and the reason im sad is that gavi got a girlfriend. which i realize is probly the stupidest and most juvenile thing to be sad over but hear me out (or dont lmao its a free country do whatever you want).

its not like i ever thought i had a chance with him or anything, im not stupid. but ive known for a very long time that, due to my asexuality (and other things but mostly that), i am never going to have love in my life. so for me, daydreaming and fantasizing about being gavis girlfriend was like,,, how i coped, i guess. it was a form of escapism for me. and now i cant do that anymore bc hes someones boyfriend and fantasizing abt another girls boyfriend just feels wrong. and pathetic.

it doesnt help that all my social medias have algorithmed so that hes all over all my feeds. and to be honest, looking at him just makes me think of his beautiful girlfriend who has everything i could ever want and i feel this horrible awful nauseating feeling in my stomach and i feel envious and sad and a slew of other things. it sucks that someone who once unknowingly made me so happy now does the exact opposite but hey what can you do.

i know it sounds stupid, but i dont think i'll ever feel for someone the way i feel about him. hes the most beautiful person ive ever laid eyes on and oh God i was right this does sound stupid ok lets continue

oh and let me be clear (you hafta read that in obamas voice) im aware that feeling this way toward a complete stranger (or anyone for that matter, but like especially a complete stranger) is EXTREMELY UNHEALTHY. unfortunately, knowing that my feelings and thoughts are unhealthy doesnt stop me from having them.

so yeah. now that ive lost my form of escapism, all i can think about at any given moment is how lonely im going to be. its hard to enjoy much of anything these days when all im thinking about is how im never going to receive romantic love, and now i cant even daydream about dating gavi to cope with it. because all i can think about when i try to is how hard his girlfriend would laugh if she found out some pathetic worm halfway across the world was fantasizing about her man.

so yeah thats it. i know that every time i angst abt my asexuality (which is a LOT like holy shit why do ppl still follow me), my friends tell me that its ok because im going to find someone someday. and i appreciate it, i really do. it means the world. but my friends saying that i'll find love doesnt make it true. plenty of people have died alone and unloved before, and i am going to be one of them.

tldr: a guy ive never met got a girlfriend n im having a depressive episode abt it LMAOOOO

[nerves-nebula]

chelloooo the tmnt getting more racist thing is actually rlly interesting to me because I don’t think it’s getting more racist , I just think that as more and more pieces of media with good Asian representation come out (eeao, amphibia, and even elemental are the first things I can think of) there’s more stuff to compare it to and realize that tmnt is just… not it. And that although it’s gotten less blatantly stereotypical, it just hasn’t followed the curve of good Asian representation in media. It continues to be lacking. It improves in small ways. It’s just slow 

and I also think it’s because how tmnt handles japanese and east asian culture in general took such a fucking nosedive with mutant mayhem. Look at splinters entire character and the fact they learned to be ninjas from mostly popular chinese movies. Like almost everything about this movie shows how much the creators were looking through it with an orientalist lens

Like. I don’t think tmnt is getting more racist, I think the amount of racist shit is staying relatively the same.* So as western culture and pop culture starts to be less racist, tmnt starts to look more racist as a result. And also because socially and culturally speaking, tmntmm is Rlly Bad. Like look at it once with ANY IDEA of racist stereotypes and it’s Bad. It would have been fine like any year before 2023. But compare it to any popular piece of media that’s come out in the past 1-3 years and its…. Lord. It’s not it ………

(I like tmntmm etc. I just have to ignore a lot of the racist stuff in it, as I have to do with most pieces of media. But for something that came out in the 20s it’s so much harder to turn a blind eye to it than other stuff.)

*imo it improves the most with rottmnt. But that show was also racist in other ways, just not towards japenese culture. It handled being asian american and an immigrant surprisingly well

(also for judas’ followers who don’t know me I’m asian 👍) -angie and jonah

OHHH YOU PUT IT PERFECTLY INTO WORDS. Tmnt isn’t really getting more racist it’s just improving very very slowly compared to a lot of modern media.

Like it feels weird when racist stuff happen in old media but you kind of expect it in old movies & tv- but when it’s still present in modern day it’s kinda more noticeable.

And yea I feel a similar way about mutant mayhem, it’s very good in a lot of ways! Racially isn’t one of them!

Not even just with Asian stuff either- which I think you’ve covered pretty well here- but from a black perspective it’s not great either. superfly is kind of weird to me cuz he’s clearly black and his coding is clearly pulling from black culture and he’s all macho and chains and I love that for him. I think he’s so cool.

But he’s basically just another one of those villains who’s an oppressed person who’s faced violent discrimination and fought back- and that in itself is framed as explicitly evil. Him telling the story of how he was being chased by a mob and faught back is when we’re supposed to start thinking he might be evil.

and so he’s like, coded as an activist or civil rights leader, but instead of fighting for equality rights he wants to kill all white people (in a metaphorical sense) and it’s like oh ok cool. This again. Greatttt.

Anyway point is: ur so right

[lover-of-mine]

i don't think you're giving enough credit anna though, because at least to me it does seem during the hiatus a lot of the people that were giving BT a chance reverted back to Buddie. It's likely because they saw the writing on the wall for BT and also they woke up from the buzz of the newness of Tommy and realized there's absolutely nothing there. So a lot of people woke up from the spell of bi buck and realized the truth during the hiatus. I would say a majority of the fandom woke up. Sure there's still the dumb die hards who are filled with people who proudly say they have not watched all the previous seasons of the show.

Oh, no, honey, I'm fully aware of that. I've been watching people pop back into my notifications, suddenly back to interacting with my buddie shit, I've been watching people who were multishiping just go back to being mostly buddie, I've been watching the interaction with bt shit reduce. I just like poking at the people who went to war for Tommy simply because he's a man and now have to deal with the fact that they took things too far. The way people were going on and on about how he's the most compelling love interest Buck has ever had after exactly one kiss because they were blinded by the "Buck is bi" high and now don't know how to backtrack or to accept the fact that Tommy is a device to make Buck bi who had no development beyond that. Poking fun at the people who were spending a fortune on an actor to manipulate what counts as canon just for him to completely ditch them and force them to the reality that the show gave them NOTHING. Watch them scramble to act as if constantly dismissing Buck and poorly timed sex jokes is somehow a good thing. I know the majority of people who are multishiping are reasonable. My thing is not against the reasonable people who ship them. Reasonable people are not out in the world screaming about how awful Eddie and Ryan are. Reasonable people are not in people's inboxes calling them names just because they didn't fall head over heels for Tommy. Reasonable people aren't digging through interviews as if interviews prove something and wearing comments from 3 years ago as some fucked up badge of honor. Reasonable people aren't harassing actors as if having actor interaction somehow makes them superior. I know the majority of people are reasonable and understand the show and just wanted to have fun with the two of them but understand it for what it is on the show now that the high has settled. My problem was never and will never be with anyone who got caught up in the excitement but were enjoying it on their own playground. My problem is with everyone who continues to try and force this narrative that paints Tommy as a lot more than he is simply because he's a man and somehow act as if Buck's bisexuality is only valid for them if he's dating a guy. The people who want to say Buck's past relationships didn't work because he was dating women. The people who keep talking shit about Eddie simply because Eddie "is in the way". The people who try to act as if the relationship is perfect and Eddie should die alone just because Buck is getting dicked down. You can ship whatever makes you happy. You can write whatever makes you happy. You can headcanon whatever makes you happy. My problem is the insistence in manipulating canon to make Tommy seem better than he was written because they took it too far with no information and can't back out of it now. That's the only part of the fandom I have an issue with. I still follow people who ship them. I just don't interact with their pro shit, they ignore my anti shit and we exist in harmony. I just don't like the idea that I have to ship them or else I'm being weird about queer relationships or I'm ignoring Buck's choices or I'm just plain homophobic or couldn't possibly understand the complexities of their relationship just because I'm a woman. And I have a window to the worst of that because I live rent free in their heads for some reason and if I didn't make fun of the situation, I would lose my mind. I know people have woken up. I have never had a problem with that part of the fandom. I only have an issue with the ones who are still going to war over nothing.

[ladyloveandjustice]

oh yeah I did watch the Sailor Cosmos Movies a while back.

-It genuinely startled me to hear Mamoru tell Usagi "I love you" (Aishiteru, no less) and I realized this is because I don't think he ever said it in the 90's anime. The closest was saying "yes" when she asked if he loved her. Weird to realize,

-Again, I prefer it to adding dumb shit like Crystal season 1 did, but the movie following the manga so faithfully means it switches location and scene every two minutes.This is fine for a manga where the backgrounds are sparse, everything flows together, you read at your own pace, but absolutely dizzying for a movie. there's no time to breathe.

-this arc is so relentless it really is like a horror movie (in space!) You're constantly waiting for the next person to die, and it's always so quick and kind of unceremonious

-they did tone down the blood though :/ of course. its okay if someone gets stabbed through the chest and dies, but can't have her bleed.

-the movie takes out any ambiguity about Cosmos being future Usagi and offers some additional backstory, with her explaining that a war broke out in Earth and decimated Crystal Tokyo and by the time they finally achieved piece so many had died she realized it could happen again and just thought maybe she should have ended things back then. It only shows dead civilians though. In one part Mamoru is seen fighting or something, but then later Usagi is contemplating the corpses on her own. There's no indication if anything happened to him or the Senshi. I think it would be funny is nothing did, and she just left to go have this existential crisis without them.

-The movie also hammers in that Usagi's choice here shows how much she's grown since the first arc (and from her past), she even flashes back to stabbing herself before saying "I want to live, no matter how tough it is". I always saw this bit of character development but the movie REALLY wants to make sure people don't miss it, which is good because from my experience a lot of people did.

-THANKFULLY the movie makes sure to show us Artemis and Luna and Diana are okay by showing Usagi returning home and Luna talking to her. It always really bothered me that the manga did not confirm that!!! i'm glad they fixed!!!

-it was basically fine, it was the manga but a little rushed and I did like all the extra stuff they added which is incredible by the reboot's standards, and I am glad to see the space opera bloodbath existential nightmare that is the final arc fully animated. That's worth everything else we had to go through. well mostly.

actually maybe it's just worth a quarter of all the other bullshit. It was a shitshow and it's taken them ten years, but it sure got completed and at least looked reasonably good toward the end.

-the fact it ends with Usagi marrying everyone is always so incredible. largely I think it's good the 90s anime is it's own seperate thing but it should have also ended with older Usagi proudly confirming she had premarital sex during her wedding and then having her entire girl squad wear wedding gowns (a tux in Haruka's case. unlike her horrible dress in this one) so they can all get married together

[spaceorphan18]

Ahh, I didn't know you liked Bridgerton! (I was away from tumblr for a moment and just now catching up on your blog) I'm obsessed with Penelope and Colin. How did you like season 3? I always love reading your thoughts! I saw so many people complain but I mostly really enjoyed it. I wish it didn't have so many random plotlines, and I didn't like the insta-baby but overall they're my favourite couple in the show haha.

Hi Nonny! Welcome back to the Tumblr! <3

I hope you don't mind me indulging a little with your ask, lol. If you've followed me for any length of time, you do know I can't shut up - but I realized I haven't really said my actual thoughts on the season, etc, I just started meta'ing and haven't looked back. So, pull up a chair, Nonny, as I chatter non-stop for a bit about Bridgerton and my thoughts on season 3, lol.

I'll put it under a cut to save the rest of your souls....

Part 1: How did we get here?

Am I big fan of historical romance? No, not really. Did I expect this show to ever have a grip on me? Not even a little bit. How in the world did this happen? Idk - it appears that favorite tropes and character designs and dynamics seem to transcend genre. And I'm an old sap.

The tl:dr version is that I watched Seasons 1 and 2 after Season 2 came out. It was fine. Not a huge fan of Season 1, I did like Season 2 though. And then kind of forgot it existed. Eloise was by far my favorite character - because I liked her spunk. And the friendship between Eloise and Penelope was the best part of the show.

And then I was reminded that Season 3 dropped and did not expect the shock that I got. I went in completely blind - I hadn't seen a single promo. I did know, because I looked up the books when I originally watched, that it would be Pen and Colin's story. But I was kind of fascinated at how they were going to go about it. Penelope was not a stereotypical leading lady. And Colin was very boy-ish looking in the early seasons. How was this going to work?

Oh man, the glow ups. The glow ups got me. Pen is so, so gorgeous this entire season. When she's wearing her hair down, omg... Or that one look where she's like a housewife writing in her journal. God damn, girl. She can get it. And then Colin... ha. When he got out of the carriage, I was like - oh shit. It was the pirate coat. A good pirate coat will always do me in.

But more than that - really, the dynamics of the characters just really sold me. I love friends to lovers. I love the angst and the pull. I love the whole she fell first he fell harder. I love that I unintentionally just go for the same kind of characters and their dynamics over and over and over.

And then, you know, between the first part and second part, I rewatched the first two seasons, which was helpful. (Though, still not a huge fan of season 1.) Was addicted to the promo tour (my god I love a good promo tour). And @ckerouac - got me to watch Derry Girls which really cemented my love of Nicola Coughlin. And, you know, once you start going down a hole, you just have to keep on going until you get to the other side.

Idk how we really got here, Nonny, but here we are! Lol

Part 2: My thoughts on Season 3

So, briefly, I just fell in love with Part 1 right off the bat. LOVED IT. Part 2, honestly, I felt disappointed after seeing it the first time. (I remember episode 6, in particular, thinking - wow that was not a very good episode).

And then... I rewatched it and then rewatched it again after watching Seasons 1 and 2 and kind of started to take it a part a bit, and it's grown on me. A lot! I actually do really love the season as a whole and appreciate what we've got...

Breaking it down a little more:

Pen and Colin's story: I still do think the first half is stronger. The whole Colin helping Pen find a husband, Lord Debling (who is a doll), Colin figuring out his issues, that carriage scene... ooff, all really, really good. The second half - there just needed to be more. At first, it was hard to watch them go through a wedding while being mad at each other, but I feel like now that I've had time to digest it all, it is /so/ good. It's a really, really fascinating dynamic going on there. I could and probably will go on at length about it later... a couple of things, though

They just needed more. The plot was so delicious. I did love the conflict over lady whistledown and I wish we had seen that tension played out better and resolved better. The end of episode 8 was a bit to fast. I swear - Season 4 better have some solidly good Polin moments or idek... They've been such a big part of the show as a whole, I hope they get to continue their development, even if it they go back to their Seasons 1 and 2 focus.

The season works better if you remember what happened in seasons 1 and 2. I had zero memory of the plots from the first two seasons going in. I didn't realize Colin's personality had changed. I couldn't remember any of the Polin moments in the first two seasons. This third season makes a whole lot more sense being built from what came before it, and honestly, I kind of love that. It makes the story more layered and engaging.

As for the insta-baby, I mean, they set it up at the beginning of the season, but it wasn't something I needed to enjoy the couple. I do wonder if they'll go back and explore that 9 months, or if things will pick up after post-baby.

Also, on perhaps a shallower note? I thought the actors had great chemistry. And I have so much respect for Nicola Coughlin for allowing herself to be presented in such a way. She is GORGEOUS in every aspect and the backlash over her body is ABSURD. If you can’t get on board that a larger woman can be seen as desirable than you can fuck right off because she is amazing.

Poor Luke Newton has gotten some push back, too, which I think is a little unfair. He's not expressive the way Jonny Bailey is, but Colin really isn't Anthony, and is much more an inward character. And the awkwardness of his attempt at rake-ishness in the beginning is supposed to be awkward. Colin isn't smoldering like the Duke from Season 1, either. He's a sweet, romantic kid who adores his bff-turned-wife, and the whole season (I mean, can we talk about the all the mirrors?) is about cutting through the bullshit we do to try to mask who we really are.

The thing about Luke Newton that I really appreciate is that he really understands who his character is and keeps that front and center. Colin is trying to be something he's not, and the real Colin slips out unintendedly, and that kind of subtly is hard to play.

The absolute best moments were when they laughed together - they both really shine when Pen and Colin are allowed to be the sweet friends they've been all along.

Anyway tl:dr - loved their relationship, and my heart will just be broken if we don't get more good development as the seasons continue.

Penelope and Eloise: The fact that this relationship was angled as another romance per se was also delicious. As I said above - Pen and Eloise were probably my favorite dynamic pre-Polin and it was devastating to watch them work their relationship out. But again, it was all so delicious. I loved it and thought it was perfect.

The Featheringtons: I LOVED THEM! They were perfection. I love that they leaned into some really good comedy with the sisters. Not only were they able to show off Nicola's excellent comedic skills, the family as a whole was just a whole delight. I loved the sisters. I loved their husbands. I even liked Portia - and, honestly, I wasn't a huge fan of her in earlier seasons. I loved that they linked Pen and Portia, it really made them seem like mother and daughter.

Colin and his family: There were some fascinating dynamics!

Colin and Eloise: yes, the third part of the platonic love triangle I loved their dynamic during the season. Eloise never really knowing how to handle Colin. The fact that they're close and yet awkwardly so. The fact that they both care so much about Pen in different ways and how LW just hangs over both dynamics. Ooff, so good.

Colin and Anthony & Benedict (and let's throw George in here, too): Love it. Wish there had been more. The brothers are hilarious and wonderful together and just I ate it all up with a spoon. Also, as an aside, I love that George is slowly coming into focus. The kid is adorable.

Colin and Francesca (and let's throw Hyacinth in here, too): Hilariously, Colin and Francesca speak zero times to each other during the whole season. Isn't that weird? Really, their plot lines do not intersect except tangentially for family moments. It's so weird. I feel like I have no sense of this dynamic. As for Hyacinth - I adore her, and I feel like she has more personality than Francesca :P

Colin and Violet: I kind of loved this. She's a mother who understands her kids. And even though Violet wasn't around that much for the A-Plot, I like what role she did have to play in getting Colin to act.

Alright, so the rest of the subplots... It did feel like an abundance of them, but was there really more than previous seasons? Or was it the fact that Pen and Colin usually were subplots, and now that they're the main focus, everything else kind of shifts awkwardly around them?

Anthony and Kate: I love them to pieces, and wish there had been more of them. Their dynamic remains sexy and smart. Kate remains one of the best characters on the show, and is such an intelligent woman. I'm so glad she had wonderful, insightful conversations with her new family. I really would have loved to have had a Kate and Penelope scene. Also, the India thing was awkward - I lol'd because it clearly was written as an 'out' for the couple. But it's ultimately fine. But yes - bring back Kanthony in future seasons. I really don't care how much Jonathan Bailey is doing other things.

Cressida Cowper: I thought she was a fantastic villain, and the fact that she was so wrapped up with Eloise was kind of delicious. I don't think they needed to linger on her private life as much as they did. But I was fascinated that there seemed to be some queer coding in there, and wondered, for a bit if she was going to be a lesbian. I also think her ending was a little weak and she just kind of scampered off without any reprieve. I do wonder if she'll be back, tbh.

Francesca: Oof. It was intriguing on first watch but I find it incredibly dragging on subsequent watches and have a tendency to skip over it. I think this is the one plot line that really could have been cut down. I understand that it's set up but it was kind of meh for me. However, I am totally fine with her love interest being changed to a woman. Let's do this bisexuals! Speaking of which...

Benedict: My god, it felt like the show doesn't know what to do with him - and I am hoping Season 4 is his, because they NEED to do something with Benedict. So, to be clear, I LOVE that they made him bisexual. But the woman he was with was so boring, and I just did not care - because I knew it ultimately wasn't going to go anywhere. And, what was with the never ending orgy? Did we really need to cut back to it ten times? Please, show, give Benedict something interesting to do.

The Mondriches: Look, I feel bad saying it, but these people ultimately served no purpose to the show and could have been lifted right out. I'm sure the actors are lovely but if they're not going to directly service the story, then why are we wasting our time? Though, at least they really aren't the ones taking up the most time.

The Queen: They could have played up the rivalry between her and LW a lot more, and they just didn't. It felt... a little anticlimactic. Also, now what do they do with her as a character? Meh.

Violet and Lady Danbury's brother: I just don't care. I get it. I get that Violet should have something to do outside her children. But there are already a million plots, and not everyone needs to have their own individual story. By the time they threaded this in around episode 3 it did feel like too much.

Did I miss anything?

So... that's how I felt on everything. I have seen commentary about the pushback on Season 3. There are some things I agree about and a lot I don't.

About the actors: I disagree, Nicola and Luke are a delight, and they don't deserve the pushback they've been getting.

About the subplots: It is too many, and I do think they should have either made the season longer, or cut a few things.

About Polin not being as steamy: I think Daphne and Simon's soft core porn-a-thon set an expectation that doesn't necessarily work when you're going for other tropes. I did like the steamy scenes we got (though the last one should have been longer -- we better get some happy sex in season 4 or I will be annoyed) but Polin doesn't have the same dynamic as (what is their shipper name??) Daphne/Simon. We were never going to get the porn-a-thon.

Kanthany didn't either in Season 2, I don't know what to tell people. I appreciate that they're servicing the story they're telling and not just relying on sex. But, I will say, it is still the romance genre, based on books that do feature a lot of sex, so I can understand disappointment in some respects. There is a reason people watch these things, and when it's not met, it can be frustrating.

Idk, what else are people bitching about? (that's rhetorical) I think two years is too long a wait for a show like this. And the anthology aspect of it can make it hard when the focus shifts. People adored Anthony and Kate and to shift it to a very different type of love story can feel jarring, especially, I think if you've spent the past two years digesting what we've already had.

And then there are some people who are just never happy.

And I mean, I already feel a little 'meh' about Season 4. (It'll be Benedicts, there are so many hints...) I'll continue to watch, but I am incredibly sad that this was the year my favorites got to shine. My only hope is that Pen and Colin continue to occupy a space in the story... lord help us, though, in that it doesn't take another ten years to finish...

So.... them my thoughts! I'm sure I'll have more of them as I settle into this bright new world.

Omg, how cute are they????

[starfoundnight]

I read something like this but I forgot who the user was im so sorry. Everyone who is mentioned is in college.

Playboy!Sanji x Chubby!Reader

Playboy!Sanji who loves to go to parties and just fuck around with diffrent girls but he nevers bother to get their numbers or even know their name. Hes always the first to wake up and then just leave.

Playboy!Sanji who lost his touch in being a gentleman when he was in middle school. He became more of an asshole from all praise he got from all the girls and teachers. He started to realize that he could get away with a lot. His grades were amazing and his words were seductive to all the girls.

Playboy!Sanji who bumps shoulders with you in the hallway. He scoffs walking away. You grab his wrist. "You think just because you're some hot shot you can be a dick to me?" He chuckles at how you talked to him just now. "Yeah, I do" You want to kick him right there and then in his balls but you have an important test you're going to, you don't want trouble so you let his wrist go. "Fuck with me again and i'll make sure you cant fuck anyone."

Playboy!Sanji who sees you at a big house party with such a slutty (short) dress revealing so much of your clevage. He knew you were curvy but hell he couldn't take his eyes off you. Your stomach looked so soft he just wanted to come from behind you and grab your stomach so gently and he grinds his hard cock on your ass and whispers into your ear about how he'll put his baby into your womb filling you up full.

Playboy!Sanji who has a random girl on his lap as he continues to stare at you. Ignoring everyone he waits until you look back at him. He smirks when you two make eye contact and you flip him off. The way you smile, holy shit. What were you doing to him?

Playboy!Sanji he stands up ignoring the girl that was on his lap now on the floor. He steps over the girl and walks upto you. Your mouth widens in shock from how he just treated the girl. "How can you be so mean and flip me off darling?" You roll your eyes and try walk away but he grabs your wrist and smirks "Scared? I don't bite" "Yeah but you fuck with every girl that talks to you. Im worth way fucking more than that." He lets go of your wrist and puts his hands up "Then lets get to know eachother"

Playboy!Sanji who follows you all the time now not leaving your side for even a second. Its been several months and hes changed a lot. Well towards you mainly. He pushed all the girls away and those who were persistent, he paid one of his real girl friends (Nami and Robin. Lets be for real. Nothing will stop him being a gentleman to them. Nami would just beat him if he tried being as ass.) to threaten her or beat her if it come to that.

Playboy!Sanji who knows nothing will get in between you two, absolutely nothing. All his close friends supported you two. When they see you, they know Sanji is close by. When they see Sanji, they know you are not far. It was cute to you. Always knowing Sanji is close but it was a must to Sanji. He needed to know what you were doing and who you were talking to.

Playboy!Sanji who calls you every night just to talk to you or hear your voice. Who sends you pics of his abs with a text similar to "This is what you finna see when you're riding me darling <3" You send him a pic of your toes. "You fight with your toes! >:D" He laughs and screenshots the pic you sent him to blackmail you for a good cause someday.

Playboy!Sanji who talks shit with you about mostly everyone in school. The pick me's. The oh im so tiny and small and petite girls. The misogynistic boys who only say those things for their friends approval. The ones who act insecure just for more compliments. The ones who dates their friends ex's. The ones who pick on people who are smaller than them to feel strong. You love talking shit about people who deserve it.

Playboy!Sanji who is always behind you when walk up the stairs claiming to not allow anyone to look up you skirt but gets hard every time he peeks up your short skirt and sees your panties and your thighs rubbing together especially seeing your hamstrings jiggling.

Playboy!Sanji who drags you to a party and makes you sit on his lap because he blackmailed you by saying he'll show everyone your toes. You and Sanji get offered a few drinks from mutual friends and you take them having a few cups turn into having a bit more than you can handle.

Playboy!Sanji Sitting and every hour a girl came up to him he would always hold you by your stomach. This time was diffrent "Hey Sanji" You noticed she pulled her dress up more and saw her slim body. "We've met?" She nods "Duh, we slept together" He shrugs and pull you more into him "Well I don't remember you." She laughs awkwardly "You choose this fat bitch over me?" He glares at her. "What the fuck did you just say?" You stand up and punch the girl straight in the face making her stumble backward falling into the pool. "Fucking bitch."

Playboy!Sanji laughs and pulls you to leave the party before anymore trouble comes. You two are walking and you partially drunk. "Was it bad that I punched her?" Sanji holds you close by your waist "Of course not darling, that bitch deserved it." You giggle and hiccup feeling a bit woozy. "'M hungry Sanji..." You two see a convient store and walk over, Sanji buying all the snack you wanted and ate with you outside on the curb.

Playboy!Sanji is surprised when you asked him "You keep saying all these sweet words to me but when will you ask me to be your girlfriend?" He smiles and puts your foreheads together not wanting to do anything intimate while you're drunk. "You want to be my girlfriend?" You nod and smile brightly "You changed for the better. Im so happy"

Playboy!Sanji who takes you to his apartment and lays you in bed letting you rest. He kneels down next to the bed laying his head on your stomach as you both hold hands and fall asleep together. You both wake up at the same time. "I'll ask when the time is right." Sanji says and smiles and you're confused as hell. "Ask me what?" He chuckles "What do you want for breakfast?"

Playboy!Sanji who make you the omelet you love oh so much with a few toast and a cup of tea. "oh my god...I punched that girl last night!" He laughs wondering when you'll click to what happened last night. "Yeah that was fucking hilarious" You smile "You said she deserved it." "Hahaha yeah I guess I did darling"

I'll make another part. This is all I've got. <3

[yandereocs]

Something cool for yan harem would be if darling used them against eachother. Like they tell one character that another is doing smth bad so they’d argue and leave darling alone! or maybe even telling one character another char tried to help them escape so that character will be like kicked out

🪼

* YOOO THIS IS SO SMARTTT

* Also!! The stuff written in italics means that the hybrids are speaking in their native language and the reader doesn't understand what's being said!!

Yandere Harem darling purposefully starting fights

Being in a harem of sorts was always rough.

Too many people trying to touch you, to talk to you, to look at you.

It's incredibly overwhelming. You just want to be left alone because you honestly can't take it anymore.

Which is when you realized something.

This little 'harem' of yours fights a lot. And when they fight, it gives you a chance to slip away and have some alone time. What an advantage!

So here you were, sitting with Zack in the living room as he absent-mindedly rubs your back. Zack is nice enough, still insane but he's nice. But you're so sick of people near people. Earlier you were forced to have breakfast with the Twins, then you were traded off to Villain - which is always terrible - and now you were with Zack.

You're tired and your body is still sore from how aggressively Villain showed her 'love' towards you. So why not stir the pot a little and possibly get some alone time?

"Elijah told me something the other day."

Zack's ears perked up at the sound of your voice but his expression soured at the mention of Elijah. The wolf hybrid HATES Elijah, and for good reason.

"What'd he say?"

Zack continued to rub your back, although his tail slowly swayed in irritation from the topic of Elijah.

"He said you're a dirty mutt."

Is it a bit on the nose? A little. It might've been obvious that you were trying to purposefully start shit, but you knew Zack wouldn't think too much about it. He trusted you, after all. And he just really hates Elijah.

"Excuse me?"

Zack stopped rubbing your back and he stared at you, his eyebrows furrowed. You stared back, trying to appear like an innocent messenger.

"Mhm. He said that you're a dumb dog, and that you'll never be more than a 'defect'. Whatever that means."

You knew what a defect was. A hybrid who can't use magic. But you figured it would be better if you acted like you didn't know the meaning of the word.

"What? Oh, that little..."

Zack's voice lowers to a growl and he abruptly stands up, leaving the living room to find Elijah. You follow him, just to make sure your little lie worked.

"Elijah! Get your ass over here!"

Zack yells in a foreign language that you don't understand, but you can tell that he's pissed off. The shouting kinda gave it away.

"What?"

Elijah walks out from one of the many rooms, his sister following close behind. Elijah seems irritated, his tail flicking occasionally.

"What the hell is wrong with you?! Why would you trash talk me to my beloved? I mean, I KNOW why, but still!"

You wish you could understand the strange language the hybrids spoke. It's always interesting to see Zack lose his cool since he's normally so relaxed, so you've always wanted to hear what it was he was saying.

"What are you even talking about? I didn't do anything of the sort. Probably."

Elijah let out a sharp exhale and his pupils narrowed to slits. Bonnie was looking at her brother and then at Zack before she chimed in.

"Don't say 'MY beloved'. They belong to ALL of us. But mostly me and Elijah."

Whatever Bonnie said seemed to have set off Zack even more because his fur started to bristle.

"Shut up! I wasn't even talking to you! And what the hell do you mean 'probably'? That's basically admitting that you did!"

Zack snapped at Bonnie before shouting at Elijah again. The Twins peeked their heads around the corner to see what the ruckus was about, snickering at the scene in front of them.

"Man, you are SO annoying. You're like a yapping dog."

Elijah rolled his eyes and Bonnie nodded in support for her creep of a brother. Zack's tail lashed and he let out another low growl before he started to shout at Elijah again. The bickering just got worse and worse and more people were coming to see what the deal was.

As the fight continued, more people started to chime in. With Karro telling the two to shut up and Royalty threatening to kill someone if the fighting doesn't stop, which prompted Logan to freak out and try to calm Zack and Elijah.

Everyone was focused on this stupid fight. No eyes on you. Which was perfect.

You quietly slipped away, heading up to the attic. You were worried that maybe Forgotten or Andras would be up here since they weren't down watching the fight, but both strange entities were nowhere to be seen.

You let out a sigh of relief and trudge over to the bed in the attic, flopping on the mattress. It wasn't complete silence since you could hear the loud bickering from downstairs through the floor, but it was better than being smothered by all the maniacs that call themselves your lovers.

You got into a position you found comfortable and pulled the blanket over you, shutting your eyes. This was a good chance to get some rest without having to feel unwanted hands on your body or warm breathing on your neck.

You should have done this sooner, honestly. Every one of them were constantly on the edge of ripping the rest of the harem apart. They were all so easy to get riled up! Well, most of them were.

But the amount doesn't matter. As long as there's two of them, which there is, that'll fight each other, then your little plan would work!

Is it a bit evil to manipulate a situation where fighting breaks out? Yes. But everyone here deserved it for being such suffocating, obsessive maniacs. So you didn't feel bad, and you never would.

Because you really needed this small break in order to not lose your mind.

[waitmyturtles]

THE MORNING AFTER: ONLY FRIENDS, EPISODE 5 ("CH-CH-CH-CHANGES / TURN AND FACE THE STRANGE") EDITION

Well, well, FUCKING well. Man, I am REELING. THAT. Was a HELL of an episode of a drama. Jojo and his team need to applaud themselves.

Let me set this up by sharing with y’all a tweet that really stuck with me after episode 4, but I think it’s pertinent to episode 5:

Now, yes -- this is a touch of a generalization (many of my queer friends are straight-edge-and-or-early-to-bed-while-living-in-cities folx), but I want to note something important in this tweet.

Before I got started on episode 5 last night, after having seen a lot of the meta and reactions on my dash throughout the day, I shot a note to dear @ranchthoughts that I thought I'd have to get a little #oldmom on this episode. Speaking to chibi's note above: toxicity happens to be a common human trait. Seeing that there was QUITE a bit of surprise for Boston's "outing" of Ray to Sand on my dash actually surprised me.

From my lawyer friends, I learned about the following concept, and I just cracked the fuck up the first time I heard it, because it rang really true once I got my head around it: a lawyer friend once told me that when he started out at a typical major American law firm, his orientation included hearing a presentation from an older managing partner about the idea of the "equal opportunity asshole." Meaning: there's workplace harassment against protected classes, like race-based or sex-based harassment. But: can you get sued if you treat EVERYONE AROUND YOU like shit? And, he didn't mean on a personal level, not on an attacking level. Just on an abrupt, aggressive level. A bossy level. A very direct-toned level.

That kind of interaction -- an interaction with an equal opportunity asshole -- we know those kinds of people, right? These kinds of folks are...titchy. They might jump to conclusions. They're rooted in their worldview ONE HUNDRED PERCENT. They lack empathy. They make you feel unsettled. They are emotionally disconnected from you. They have NO interest in being emotionally connected WITH YOU.

When I dove into episode 5, I really thought I'd be writing about Boston as the equal opportunity asshole, and I think that this theory still holds to a great extent, but -- there's a but, a slight and fascinating-to-me but, that I'll get to in a second.

@ranchthoughts did the thing once more of covering EVERYTHING in her episode 5 ephemerality breakdown, so dear Ranch, I'm just gonna repeat some stuff you said in my own words, if you don't mind. First off, a couple of gushes:

1) That blind dining scene had me swooning. "Life is like a box of chocolates: you never know what you're gonna get," was what I was hearing when I was watching that. These lovely idiots are blind to what's happening in front of them, and what that means to them -- BUT THAT'S OKAY, BECAUSE THEY ARE YOUNG. YOUNG AND INEXPERIENCED. The blind dining metaphor, oh gawd -- using your senses to come to realizations about how you're truly feeling, and how to connect better with WHAT you're feeling? Slamming my hands on the table! BRILLIANT. Mew is SO clueless (OR IS HE?!?!??!).

1.5) And -- remember (all you young folks out there!). Youth is fleeting (cc the Ephemerality Squad). What we're watching of this cohort of "friends" is their building their bases of life experiences NOW, that will TEACH them how they will live more EXPERIENCED lives in their futures. Will their lives be better? Who the fuck knows. But their FUTURE LIVES will be shaped by what they're experiencing NOW.

2) Ranch nailed this already, but Sand is just as bad as Ray in living in the annals of time. (He's also naughty for another reason, which I'll get into in a postscript.) He's got the vintage tees, he wants to rewind to Woodstock, he's a fan of mostly classic Brit rock (....I will not call the Arctic Monkeys classic Brit rock, I will not, thus, "mostly," lol.) Dear friend @neuroticbookworm described this phenomenon of Sand's in the frame of Ray dabbling in a day of poverty tourism, as essentially what his day and night with Sand constituted. But I'd also add that Sand's living in a fantasy world of a couple levels to break the monotony of his everyday life. Those flashes of hope that he'll travel to world to festivals one day -- as he clocks 450 baht (around $12 USD) per bottle, as he sings, as he gets up and gets down -- yes, Ray is his fantasy, his non-existent 25th hour, Ray is the break from monotony that Sand needs as a thing to look forward too. Of course it comes crashing down.

3) But it'll come crashing down anyway, because I will posit the following: Sand's survival fantasies are necessary to keep him going by way of motivation, because Sand is going to be held back by others, and not just Ray. Sand is caught in a trap of filial piety. (OH SHIT! GIMME!) He's paying off his mom's debts.

We don't know how much the debts are. [We're seeing in Dangerous Romance that Sailom is getting his ass beat if he and his brother don't pay the debt collectors on time every month. Shit, the debt collectors are even trying to make Sailom an escort (which then turns into Kanghan buying off Sailom himself, but lemme leave that alone, WRONG SHOW)]. But even Sand's mom admits: Sand is solving a problem of MY OWN CREATION. How good is my son? He's a very good son. Drink up, honey.

Sand thought of Ray: wow, this guy might be into me, and shit, I'm into him. And I could use this right now! I could use this break. And that illusion came crashing down when Sand -- an intelligent dude! -- put two and two together real fast. And Sand, very rightly -- because he is FAST learning independence, in a totally different way than the main OF quartet -- pulls the hell away, and puts away the fantasy of Ray at Alone O'Clock.

3.5) I just want to note, real quick, that we now have TWO of my favorite-ist themes in this show: we have intergenerational trauma by way of Ray, and filial piety by way of Sand. THANK YOU, JOJO AND TEAM! *This* bitch is TRACKIN'.

4) Big ephemerality note here: I just, I SWOONED, GOD, I LOVED IT, WHEN RAY REVEALED HIS MOTHER WAS AN ACTRESS. And that she was bitter about getting pregnant and how that affected her career. Are you kidding me? JOJO. NINEW. ALL OF YOU. BRILLIANT. The ephemerality OF SHOWBIZ ITSELF.

Aren't all these actors risking their damn careers by potentially BLOWING UP THEIR SHIPS for the sake of this show? (I mean, that's actually a little far-fetched, as FirstKhao will be the first GMMTV pair to have an intercontinental fanmeet, BUT STILL.) God, the commentary on the FICKLENESS of showbiz was just CHEF'S KISS.

5) As Ranch noted, this was the episode where CHANNNNNGGGGEEEEE was the big bell ringing. Top needed something different than his sexual monotony -- so he goes after Mew, and shit, homes is bored AF. (@lurkingshan covered this perfectly here.) Mew contemplates changing for Top, the LASIK, the sex, all of it. Top seems to try a different kind of sex with Mew -- soft and romantic sex that ends with "I love you." Nick (oh, my bubby Nick), changes for Boston, becomes ripped, finds buttons and slacks. Boston contemplates whittling his list down. Ray wears secondhand (lol, it's called "vintage," asshole). Sand changes his routine to accommodate Ray.

And yet. I very, very often say in my posts that the process of behavioral change is INCREDIBLY difficult.

The five stages of behavioral change are: pre-contemplation, contemplation (Nick and the podcast), preparation, action (Nick at the gym), and maintenance.

The risk to this process, at any point in time, is: RELAPSE.

Think of how difficult it is to quit smoking. To go on a diet. To start an exercise routine. To stop biting your nails.

What is the thing that marks these processes more than anything else?

It's the RELAPSE into the old behavior, the old habits.

We really saw Boston trying to change...something. Trying to stick out...something with Nick. Trying on something new. Kinda like the way Ray tried on his secondhand shirt.

And then Boston experiences a familiar trigger: a trigger of jealousy when Mew calls him, innocently, to give Boston the heads-up that he's about ready to experience some cherry magic.

And that trigger, like all of our own triggers -- stress, a change of environment, a change of the people around you -- sent Boston back to a place.

Listen, I will, in no way, ever defend Boston's behavior. He was drunk and high AF, and he's generally toxic. Jojo is totally egging this on.

I would absolutely call Boston an equal opportunity asshole. He's only seeing the world from his own worldview, his own desires, his own desire to control whatever he can control around him.

But like I said before: toxicity is FAR more common that we'd like to believe. And toxicity within someone doesn't disappear very easily -- just like any of our habits, be they good or bad habits.

Boston was trying out a new life, for a few minutes (lol), of being a LITTLE LESS EPHEMERAL, a little less aloof -- a little less toxic. And a trigger brought him back to his bad place, and I think what we saw in that damn outburst was a relapse of the highest order.

Ray repeats to Nick what Top and Cheum have already said. This guy, Boston? He's nasty. Stay away. Boston's an asshole. Boston's still being stigmatized, and still living up to his label.

How would I summarize all of this? Throughout this ENTIRE episode, what was screaming within my head, as I said above, was: youth is fleeting. Youth itself is ephemeral. The experiences these young folks are going through at this moment in this show will build their experiences for how they will survive (or not) in their futures.

We may think that Boston, and Ray, and Mew, will not learn from their dumbass behavior, but -- they will. They will have no choice. Because their time being this young, and inexperienced, and idiotic, will flee. They'll graduate, and they will have to learn how to survive in a "real" world that may very well be far more brutal to them than their proximate friendships are to them right now. And man, if they have to experience lives that are MORE brutal than these proximate friendships they have, then good LUCK to them, because, well -- shit. It ain't pretty the way it is right now.

...

P.S. I just thought this whole scene was brilliant. Sand, honey, you're not as innocent as your meow feelings are letting on. I'm holding you accountable for what you're saying to Ray, too.

P.P.S. JENNIE.

(HAPPY SUNDAY, EPHEMERALITY SQUAD! @ranchthoughts @lurkingshan @neuroticbookworm @distant-screaming @slayerkitty @clara-maybe-ontheroad @twig-tea)

(HEY, SQUAD: if you tag me in things, and I forget to reblog, send me a DM! I'm on the last stages of this moving chapter of my life, and I don't wanna miss your meta!)

[romanarose]

Just Happy Accidents

Jake Lockley X Reader

Summary: Jake gets rear ended.

Warnings: A lil yelling, Jake kinda being a dick, a lil smutty (over the clothes touching, thigh riding) Mostly just cuteness

Forgot to add, bold is Steven, italics is Marc, red is Jake (This is my system for all my fics btw)

Jake Lockley was about to lose his goddamn shit. Here he was, stopped at a stop sign, when some dumbass rammed into it. A full stop, mind you, because despite what everyone seems to think, he actually follows all traffic laws. Last thing he needed was a run in with the cops, or god forbid an accident that leaves Marc and Steven fucked up. Luckily, as he moved his body, he was sure things were probably fine. He had to explain to them why their neck hurt, but that was it. For him, anyway.

His car was going to be another fucking story. He gets out of his cab, fuming, ready to yell at someone. He did not expect the girl to get out of the car and yell at him. 

“What is wrong with you!” You shout, furious.

He blinks at the audacity. “Excuse me? You hit me!” He shouts, pointing at himself.

“YOUSTOPPEDTOOFAST” You spit out rapidly, panic quickly setting in.

“There is no such thing as stopping too fast, idiota, you were either following too close, or not paying attention!” Jake counters, knowing traffic laws better than he probably needs to. 

You freeze, knowing he has a point, and you were caught. You immediately break down crying.

Jake is only human, and a pretty young girl crying in front of him is not something he enjoys.

“Hey… hey now…” He starts, uncertain ahow to go about this. 

“I’m never going to financially recover from this!” you sob into your hands.

Jake, why is there a crying girl in front of you? Of course Steven comes to the headspace when there’s crying.

Everything is fine, Steven, just a fender bender.

Oh bullocks, are you okay? Is she?

I’m fine, Steven, so is- Jake realized he didn’t know if you were hurt or not. “Are you hurt?”

Your hands were in your face as you cried. “No” You shook your head.

Jake paused, waiting for you to stop crying. It didn’t happen. He was still irritated. “Well, this is what insurance is for.” C’mon mate, don’t be an arse

Your sobs picked up again. “I don’t have insurance.” 

Dios Mio. Jake thought, just my fucking luck. “You don’t have insurance?” Jake pinched the bridge of his nose. “Mujer, what the fuck?”

You remove your hands from your red and blotchy face. “Well you don’t have to be a fucking dick about it.”

He put his hands on his knees in bewilderment. “You rear ended me, Chica. You don’t get to tell me not to be a dick.”

“Do you think I hit you for shits and giggles?” You said through tears.

Don’t be an asshole Great. Marc was here, just what he needed.

Jake tried to calm himself, stand back up straight. “Whyyyyy don’t you have insurance, Carino?” He tried to hide the irritation in his voice behind the pet name.

You threw up your hands. “I got laid off okay! Are you happy! I got laid off and I just got behind on all my bills and I was either car insurance or rent so you can fuck right off with your judgy fucking face right now!” You were angry, not necessarily at him… but he wasn’t fucking helping. He was being a dick. You start crying again.

Come on mate, be nice. Jake sighed. “Okay don’t start that again, I’m sure we can work this out.” Just let it go, man. It’s just the fender. We can buy one online and install it ourselves, she’s clearly having a rough time. She kept crying. Would you be saying that if she wasn’t pretty? You got me.

“I’m sorry.” You muttered into your hands. “It’s been a long few months. Lots of pent up emotions. I’ll call the police and get your information and figure out whatever the fuck I do now.”

“Listen, don’t… don’t worry about it, hermosa.”

“No!” You pointed at him determinedly. “No, Thank you but no. I’m just so sick of charity. I know it’s probably hard to believe when I’m crying in front of you, but I am sick of people pitying me. I just found a new job and I’m catching up on bills, I’ll just skip a few card payments or whatever.”

“Okay, okay.” Jake put up his hands defensively. “No charity. We can exchange information and figure out a payment plan. I know some shit about car repair, I can do that myself, and you can pay me back what you can, when you can.” Is this just an excuse to get her number? No, dumbass, it’s an excuse to get my car fixed. Listen, I wouldn’t complain, she’s cute. You watch too much porn, Marc. We’re not using sex as payment. That’s not what I meant!

You looked at him hesitantly. “This isn’t just an excuse to get my number?” 

Jesus, does she share Steven’s brain? “No, Cariño, I just want my car fixed. Listen, there’s a dinner down the road, I was heading there for lunch. We can talk this over, come up with a plan?” When you still eye him suspiciously, he raises his hands defensively. “No funny business! Just business… regular business.”

“...Regular business? I sure hope you aren’t trying to make a come on, because you are not smooth” You laugh a bit, and suddenly Jake wanted to make you laugh again.

“Believe me, Carino, if I was flirting, you’d know” He winked at you, and moved to get in his car. “Vamnos, Chica, Gena is going to think I backed into a poll if I don’t bring a witness to testify.”

Lunch was absolutely not strictly business. It was absolutely silly business, borderline tomfoolery. No regular business got done, not in the 3 hours at the diner, not at the park after Gena kicked you out (with love), and not in the nearly three months you almost always slept at his place. At month four, you moved in. After being able to catch up on bills with a much smaller rent, you surprised him by fixing his car. Well, you bought the piece, Marc put it on. You were in charge of handing him the tools. 

“The philips head screwdriver”

“I’ll give you head.”

“Baby, please, give me the screwdrive- no not that one! I said philips head!”

“YOU SAID SCREWDRIVER”

“I said philips head before you had to make a sexual inuedo!”

“Here”

“THATS A HAMMER”

“AH DON’T YELL AT ME DAD!”

“I’M NOT YELLING”

“Fine I don’t know what a philips head screwdriver is.”

“Jesus Christ baby  you could’ve just said that.” He rolled out from under the car, grabbing what he needed. He raised his eyebrow as he held up the philips head, a lopsided smile on his face. With the help of his under-car roller, he slide back under. You pull him back you, giving him a kiss on his gross, dirty, grease covered mouth.

You adored all three of them, you adored how they all complimented each other, how you got different aspects of them all combined into one, incredibly sexy man. All of them offered something different. Jake was wild, reckless, fun. Marc was domestic, suburban dad energy. And Steven? Steven was your sexy professor.

“C’mon Steven, pay attentiont to me!”

“Let me finish this chapter, then I promise, I’m all yours.”

“Can you at least tell me what you’re reading about?” You scoot up to him, pressing your body against his as you pretend to read the book. 

Steven was not deterred. “I’m learning about the Hyksos invasion of Egypt, I didn’t think this was in your wheelhouse?”

“What the fuck are the Hyksos?”

“They are an ancient civilization that came out of nowhere and took over the Egyptians for several dynasties. No one knows who they are, where they came from, where they went…” 

“Like cotton eye joe.” You place your hand on his thigh, hoping to get him worked up.

“I- what?”

“You know. Where did he come from, where did he go, where did he come from, cotton eye joe?” You palm his hardening cocked over his jeans.

“Love… “ He warns you.

“I’m sorry! Tell me something fun about the Egyptians. I promise I’m listening” You weren’t.

“There's uh…” he swallows. “There was a female pharaoph, actually. A few of them, really but one that is particualrly interesting is Hatshepsut. She rules as a regent when her- oh god” Steven swollowed hard as you climbedup on his thigh and beganrocking your body on him as your strocked his clothed dick.

“Keep going baby.”

“T-thing is” he panted, hips bucking up. “She just never gave the thrown back, she just banished her step son.”

“Gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss”

“I-” Steven stopped, looking confused at you. “Sometimes, I wonder how your mind works, love”

You start to unbottom his jeans slowly, watching his lips part in aw as you pout at him. “Does this mean you are going to fuck me, finally?”

Gently set his book down, making sure to bookmark his spot, then pushed you back down on the couch, enrapturing you mouth in a kiss.

That’s how you found yourself in Jake’s arms, a year after the car accident, with a ring on your finger.

“Remember how we met, baby?” You ask him, tracing his bare chest with your fingers.

“How could I forget, Carino” Jake kissed the side of your face, still sweaty from making love all evening.

“Never thought I’d be this happy to have gotten in a fender bender” You smile

“It’s like Bob Ross always says. No mistakes, just happy accidents."

@my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction @ahookedheroespureheart

Thank you for reading! Had this stupid idea in my head for a while bc I'm silly

the cotton eye joe bit is based off of an actual moment with my history professor where he was talking about the hyksos and i said that. He did not know what the cotton eye joe was. At least the class laughed.

[i-am-a-living-god]

Would you...Share the plot of a story/fic/comic you don't think you'll get to but would like the world to know about?

Ok I didn't answer this at first because I didn't think I had an answer. But now I remember that I do!

So about a year ago me and two other people came up with this au that we named evil Splinter au, (very creative I know.) E.S AU for short.

So the premise is exactly what it sounds like. It's a 2012 au, but because the three of us have an unexplained burning hatred for 2012 Splinter, so we made him evil.

So the deal is, Splinter hates kids, and he's racist, against mutants. One problem, he has mutant kids. So naturally, he decides to MURDER ALL OF HIS TURTLE SONS. Bear with me, he gets attached to the idea of having only one son. so he decided to find the strongest, and weed out the weak.

So when the turtles were young (about 4 years old) he thought that Donnie was the strongest, cause he's tall. But when they got older, Splinter realized that tall does not make you strong. He realized this cause Donnie started getting into medicine, which is for losers. So he stopped loving him, and found a new favorite: Leo.

So Leo ran into the kraang when he was a lil guy, and got experimented on or something. He waddled back to the lair, (because they're basically invulnerable, cause if they died we wouldn't have a plot.) Splinter recognized this as strength, and appointed him as him new favorite. Basically, Splinter tries to get his favorite to help him kill the others.

Omg he's so pathetic lol, he needs the help of a literal child to kill other children, which he still fails to do somehow???😭

So Leo kind of is rewired by the kraang to follow orders for them, but they failed to keep him and he immediately escaped. (Plot armor, don't question it!) Because of this, his eyes shift between pink and blue, blue means he's mostly in control, and pink means the kraang-washing is in control.

Donnie ditches and makes friends with April and Casey, and they get into a relationship. He tries to find a way to fix Leo, and save his brothers or something. He doesn't like Mikey cause he's "suspicious" and Donnie thinks he's totally secretly working for Splinter.

Mikey is just totally freaked out, and also ditchs, and befriends leatherhead, and other mutants. He gets a bit paranoid and starts putting little bits of different Poison's in his brothers food, to build an immunity. It works I guess.

Raph has no idea that Splinter is trying to kill them and just thinks that Splinter is giving them some hardcore training, where you even need to be alert while you sleep!

Leo knows exactly what's going on, and tries his best to find loopholes in Splinters commands, and always manges to understand usually the opposite of what Splinter tells him. (I want you to know that this concept started when we were talking about how splinter is cryptic af, and Leo always seems to understand the opposite in the show.) Leo will also often take killing blows for his brothers, that's how they are still alive. Since Splinter doesn't want to kill Leo, he will often stop the swing before it lands of halfway through so Leo doesn't die. Leo basically uses his own body as a shield.

Anyway that's it mostly, we all made a bit of art, and one-shots for this au that never got posted cause it's a shared au, it would be awkward.

Umm I'm literally writing this at 1am, yes I'm aware that this all sounds ridiculous, especially how I'm writing it. But I do like this au, cringe for the winnn!!! There is more lore shit that I can't remember. And a lot of the stuff that we wrote about it was good (not mine though, that was shit.)

So yeah, heres our shitty au. Ta-da!

Oh yeah I forgot to tag @writing-biting who was one of the people who helped make the au lol.

[modelbus]

Hi!!!! For your 500 followers event could I get cc!Wilbur soot with enemies to lovers and forced proximity ?? Thank you, congrats on your followers, you deserve them!!! <333

Ofc! Thank you so much <333

Pairing: CC!Wilbur Soot x Gn!Reader

Enemies to Lovers - Forced Proximity

There was something about Wilbur that always pissed you off. Maybe it was how he wore glasses without needing them, or how he always had to know everything. Whatever it was, you hated him for it. And he hated you in return.

That was just how the world worked now. You were always at each other’s throats on stream, and any event with both of you was inevitably awkward. The fans were so aware of how much you hated each other that they didn’t even bother making a duo name.

“You’re going to have to try harder to get us to laugh,” Jack tells chat, waving a hand around him.

For some God-forsaken reason, Jack Manifold insisted on having you, Tommy, and Wilbur stream try not to laugh with him. In-person. At least you could mostly ignore Wilbur by focusing on the media shares.

“The thing is that we’ve all got slightly different humor types.” Wilbur tries to explain.

“We all laugh at Tommy.” You immediately counter, pleased at the chance to discredit anything he says.

“But that’s different, that’s Tommy.”

“Hey!” The boy in question exclaims. “I’m right fucking here!”

“Sorry, Tommy.” Wilbur pats him on the head, making Tommy bat his hand away.

“Fuck you!”

“Can we just watch the media shares?” Jack asks, desperately turning to you.

“Hey, I’m watching them.”

“I- that isn’t helpful.”

“I want food. Jack, what food do you have?” Tommy suddenly announces.

“You can’t just raid my food!”

“Yes I can. What food do you have? The good shit.”

Jack hesitates before answering, probably thinking about what he’s willing to let Tommy eat. “Chocolate, gummy worms, an apple, stuff like that.”

“A singular apple?” Wilbur laughs.

“I’m really healthy.”

“I want gummy worms.” Tommy leans back in his chair, slowly looking between you, Wilbur, and Jack. You’re the first one to break.

“Fine, I’ll get them for you.” You sigh, getting up and heading into Jack’s kitchen.

His kitchen is actually unfairly large. Who needs this much room to cook? Besides, it wasn’t like Jack actually did any cooking here.

Wilbur walks in while you’re searching cupboards, laughing before grabbing a cup out of one.

“Why are you here?” You ask, rolling your eyes. He always had to fucking taunt you, didn’t he?

“I’m getting water. Don’t fucking flatter yourself.”

“I’ll do what I want.”

“Fine. The gummy worms are in the pantry, by the way.”

You stand up, cheeks red. “I knew that.”

“Oh I bet you did.”

After a few minutes of rummaging in the pantry, you realize Wilbur was a fucking liar. He probably was laughing behind you right now. God, how did you fall for that?!

You turn around glaring and immediately find him. He’s leaning against the counter watching you, quietly sipping on water.

“Real funny.” You roll your eyes, something you do a lot when it comes to him.

“What?”

“They aren’t in here.”

“They should be.” He frowns, stepping into the pantry with you.

It’s not really large enough for the both of you, but you refuse to back down. Wilbur’s shoulder hits yours and you move so he can check the shelves behind you.

“Huh.”

“Yeah, dumbass. Not here.”

“I swear I saw them. Maybe they’re behind the door.”

The door opened inward for some reason, meaning it blocked a whole part of the shelves. Wilbur reaches past you to move it, accidentally shutting it.

“Great going, now it’s dark.” You sigh, knocking his hand out of the way to open the door. Some people were just dumb.

Twisting the knob, the door doesn’t budge. You step a little closer to put some weight on the door, but it still doesn’t move.

“Let me.” Wilbur puts a surprisingly gentle hand on your arm, moving you behind him.

There’s a thud as he puts weight against the door, then does it again. Even as he tries to open it your only light source remains to be the crack under the door.

“Just message Jack.” You suggest. “Clearly this isn’t working.”

“Yeah, about that. Do you have your phone?”

“…fuck.”

“You didn’t bring your phone?!” He nearly yells.

“You didn’t either!” You yell back.

“Oh my God.” There’s a thud you assume is his head hitting the door. “We’re trapped in here.”

“Great. Just wonderful.” Is your sarcastic response.

“Jack or Tommy will get suspicious after a while.”

“How long is a while though? I don’t want to be stuck in here with you for any longer than I have to.”

“Not like I want to be in here with someone who hates me either.” He snaps.

You lean backwards against a shelf, crossing your arms.

“I hate you because you hate me. And you’re also just a general dickhead.”

“Me? I’m the dickhead? Really?”

“Yeah, really.”

“You’re the one who has it out for me! Always some stupid fucking remark.”

“Please, you started it.” You scoff.

Even though there’s barely room between you two to begin with, Wilbur steps forward. He’s taller than you, so you look up and squint into the darkness to make out the vague shape of his face.

“You always poke at me first. You’re either outright mean or you hide it behind a snide remark. And everyone knows it! You hate me the same way I hate you.”

“God, do you ever shut up?” He asks.

“Not when it comes to you.”

Wilbur stays quiet for a moment. Maybe your words are sinking in. Although you retaliate just as hard as he does, his words have genuinely hurt in the past. But you’re beyond that now.

“I don’t hate you.” He finally settles on saying.

You immediately laugh. “Bullshit.”

“I don’t.”

Maybe it’s the way he says it, softer than anything you’ve ever heard him say, but you’re inclined to believe him. It makes you hesitate.

“Then why’d you start it? Why do you respond?”

Because he did ultimately start it. When you first met him, live on stream, he was a complete ass. It was that day that you became what you are today: enemies.

In the dark, you can barely make out Wilbur shaking his head. A refusal to give you his answer, an explanation you need. You need to know why. Maybe you don’t actually hate him. Maybe you’ve simply been hating him because you thought he hated you.

“Why?” You ask again. “Wilbur-“

You don’t get to finish your next sentence, because he cuts you off. Not with words, but by covering your mouth with his own.

By kissing you.

Before he can pull away you loop your arms around his neck, pulling him closer to you. Part of you knew you had always been in love with him, but the rest of you was realizing right this second.

Holy shit. You like Wilbur. How did that even happen?

“That’s why.” He breathes, pulling back slightly. “I didn’t mean to be such an ass the first day, or to fall for you. But it was easier letting you think I hated you than to tell you the truth.”

“I- I don’t even know what to say.” You admit. The kiss had genuinely frazzled you that much.

“You can tell me to shove off. Or I can kiss you again.” He suggests.

“Let’s go with the latter.”

Wilbur laughs, connecting your lips again. Of course, at that exact moment, the pantry door swings open.

“I totally forgot to warn you- what the fuck. What the fuck?!” Jack yells, stumbling back. “You two- I thought you hated each other?”

“Hi, Jack,” Wilbur smirks, pulling away from you to walk out of the pantry.

“Hi Jack.” You parrot, cheeks red.

“What. The. Fuck.”

“Amazing what some time in a pantry can do, isn’t it?” Wilbur directs his question at you, eyes sparkling like they do when he’s telling a joke. They’ve always been directed at other people, never you. But everything is changed now, isn’t it?

“Yeah. Truly amazing.”

[emeritus-fuckers]

Hi ❤️ I know requests are closed so feel free to delete this, but I am really struggling and I could use some comfort if possible. Could I get the papas comforting a reader with extreme health anxiety? Like a reader who is always afraid that they are really sick (whether they actually are or not). Tysm, your blog brings me so much joy ❤️

Hey, no worries. I said it myself, even if requests are closed, comfort asks are always fine. - Jez

Papas with a darling who has extreme health anxiety

Primo

He listens to your worries and tries to soothe your nerves.

He has some experience with somewhat similar issues (Terzo was a hypochondriac when he was younger), so he has a general clue on how to help you.

"Darling, take a deep breath. Let's take some breaths and calm down together, alright?"

He stis with you as long as you need him to before he finally talks about your symptoms.

He has you answer a lot of very detailed questions, but does so in a way that feels comforting.

He gently guides you towards more plausible reasons you might feel unwell.

Also, he's fond of using hers as medication (do not confuse it with being anti-vaxx, he absolutely believes in medicine, but if he can help with simpler methods, he will), so he'll offer that.

Offers you cupping therapy (is that how it's called in english???) and regular days off to rest just so you can feel healthier.

Secondo

This man reads a lot and does shit tons of research.

And he's an extremely fast learner, so in a few weeks he's already grasped the basic concepts and most important potential symptoms of what people learn in medical school.

He's far from being an expert and he's still learning, but he learns the very basics just to reassure you that it's fine.

He wants to make sure you're fine, seeing as he takes any potential issues very seriously.

If you think he's sick, he's going to believe you and take care of you.

Gets you a personal doctor and a nurse to make sure you're okay.

"It's alright, a more. Il dottore said you're fine. Do you need to rest? Let Papa take care of you, sí?"

He does his best to slowly and subtly change your life style to be at least a bit healthier, hoping it would help.

Watches you nap with a small smile as he does his paperwork.

Makes you nice, healthy foods. Takes you on walks. He just does a lot to make you feel healthier.

Terzo

Oh, he gets it. He was like that in his youth, although it's way worse with you.

Gentle distractions. He notices you getting anxious and tries his best to help you.

He tries to make sure you don't have time to be anxious. Tries making you focus on something fun.

If it doesn't work, he'll research your symptoms with you to calm you down.

Will get you a doctor if you insist, but mostly tries to calm you himself.

He understands what you feel, even if just a little bit. And his heart is in the right place. But like with his own issues, he doesn't deal with it at the source, he just gets distractions. All the time.

But he does try. And he does his best. He's just..not the best at handling things like that.

But if you tell him how to help you, he follows those instructions religiously.

Copia

Well... He's terrible for it.

Not because he doesn't care. It's because the poor baby cares too much and he gets caught up in it even more than you do :<

You cough and he freaks out. Makes you lay in bed and gets a doctor.

He does his very best to take care of you, mother hen mode activated.

He's gonna spoil you, trying his best to make you feel better.

He doesn't realize he makes it worse. But he loves you so much! He wants you to be happy! And safe! And healthy!

But once he does realize, he apologizes profusely and spends days researching how to properly help you.

He feels really bad about making it worse earlier, please give him a hug, he really means well with everything he does for you.

Old Nihil

He has a doctor ready for whenever he got sick. He's old, every cough could be a sign he's dying (though he's in incredibly good shape for a man his age, with only his breathing being a problem), so if you get worried about your health, he gets his doctor immediately.

No matter if it was something completely silly, if you said you were feeling unwell, he's getting the damn doctor and that's it.

The doctor better take all your worries seriously because Nihil can and will fire him otherwise.

Your comfort is more important than his own health.

The doctor is fully expected to listen to whatever troubles you and explain everything to you.

What your symptoms are, what they mean.

And they better do so gently and patiently to ease you.

Even if he may get a bit annoyed with you constantly worrying about your health (mainly because he gets pestered about his health a lot and it's fucking annoying), but he always tries his best to support you.

It does come pretty easy, considering he's a simp.

Young Nihil

Straight up tells you you're being dramatic at first. That's just what he assumes, not realizing how serious it was.

He never really cared much for his own health and he was fine, so he just tries to get you to chill out.

Once he does eventually realize what it doesn't work and that your issues are actually very serious, he just kinda sighs and makes you explain your problems to him.

He still doesn't get it, so he does a similar thing to Terzo and tries to distract you.

He can't deal with his own issues, love. He sucks at dealing with yours unless he's told specifically what to do.

Tell him when you need to be held and he'll hold you.

Tell him how to help you and he'll help you.

Tell him what to do and he'll do it.

What a fucking bottom.

Taglist: @sirlsplayland @firefirevampire @thatoddboy @ouijaboardemo (send an ask if you'd like to be added! Read the pinned post before asking!)

[anonymous-dentist]

Hi anon, sorry to bring the sbi family fanfic discussion again and for the long post , (your posts ware what made realize why i hated this thing so much)

I don’t know if is the same type of fans but i noticed that some ficwritters that are really foucused on philza and wilbur (and sbi family i think?) Are kinda trying to add cellbit to this situation? Like i read some philza focused fanfic where he interacts with cellbit and the ficwritters act like cellbit is his kid? Its weird idk how to explain very well (this is also the same people that kinda write cellbit as a native english speaker (american and european) and not a brazilian (its something that is too hard to explain right now)

And its kinda stressing me out because cellbit is written in such a weid way and its infesting the spiderbit tag lol and i dont understand what is going on half of the time since idk what the hell sbi even is (brazilian with 0 understanding about english speaking mcty)

Sorry for the long post

Oh yeah no I don’t really get it but like. I also do! Because q!Phil has become one of only a literal handful of people on the island to actually properly trust q!Cellbit and so they’re like. Friends. But obviously you can never just be friends with someone not your age and so. Fandom assigned family dynamic. It’s super weird and lowkey like. Idk it’s just weird lol.

A discussion surely must follow!

First, a brief rundown of SBI:

SBI is Sleepy Boys Inc., a group made of up streamers Philza, Wilbur Soot, Tommyinnit, and Technoblade. (Originally it was just Phil, Wilbur, and Techno, but Tommy wiggled his way in somehow.) They’re Best Friends, but somewhere along the way their fandoms said. Fuck it. Family dynamic… mostly because the ccs lowkey thought it was funny and ran with it. Wilbur alone would rather die than not have Philza Minecraft be his father

This dynamic spread to their characters on the dsmp despite them literally not once ever referring to each other all as family; iirc Techno himself said he at least wasn’t part of the family because that dynamic would be fucked up after all the shit his character did to both c!Wilbur and c!Tommy. But c!Phil was c!Wilbur’s father even though he did fully murder his ass, and Wilbur and Tommy were brothers because they’re Wilbur and Tommy and you’d have to kill them to stop them from being brothers. Tommy was never established to be c!Phil’s son, and Phil never seemed to consider him one

But then the dsmp started dying around summer 2021 and everyone was kinda just left with fanon, and SBI fanon can get weird. I’m talking borderline fetishistic nuclear family stuff, especially when you get into ‘Dark SBI’ content with Phil kidnapping Tommy or whatever and forcibly making them family? It gets weird, take a look through the tag sometime

The thing with a lot of these fics is that like. It’s gotten to a point where it’s a fandomized version of both cc! and c!SBI with some really freaky characterizations and some really diehard fans. I’ve talked about that before, so I won’t do it again.

The weirdest thing I’ve noticed about these fics, though- and this goes back to what we were talking about with Cellbit inexplicably being added to the mix all of a sudden- is that everybody has to be a family.

You’ll be hard pressed to find a SBI fic where the characters have friends. Even Tubbo and Ranboo, usually delegated to a ‘Tommy’s friend!’ role despite them not interacting much like as a group ever are treated either as extensions of Tommy himself or as his found family ‘brothers’ who Phil also inevitably helps take care of rather than as friends, and they act that way. Niki isn’t usually ever written in as Wilbur’s friend, she’s Benchtrio’s sister/mother-figure, or she’s described as Wilbur’s found family sister. Jack Manifold? Lumped in with Niki with Benchtrio as their older brother/father-figure. Quackity? Either Wilbur’s boyfriend, thus a member of the family, or Tommy’s older brother/father-figure.

Even characters who never really interacted with SBI as a “family” on the dsmp get this treatment: you’ll read an SBI fic with c!Purpled in it and he’ll be Tommy’s brother figure. c!Sam is Tommy’s father figure. Schlatt is Tommy’s uncle or Wilbur’s brother. Puffy is an aunt. Sapnap and Dream? Tommy’s brother or father figures. Even Hannah is being written as Tommy’s cool older sister figure these days despite only really interacting with him once on the smp

And you can see this kind of behavior continuing now in the qsmp fandom… if the new ccs/characters in question aren’t “problematic”. Chayanne can’t see Techno as a personal hero, he has to see him as an older brother or an uncle. Tubbo is Phil and Fit’s son and Tommy’s brother. Niki is Tallulah’s mom. Quackity is Wilbur’s boyfriend.

What you’ll actually be hard pressed to see is this kind of dynamic with Phil and other, “problematic” ccs, aka ccs who aren’t like. English ccs.

Because you won’t find q!Forever included in the family dynamics despite him basically being q!Phil’s best friend and closest confidant. It took longer for q!Missa to be added to Phil’s wiki page than it did for Techno to despite them literally being explicit canon husbands, and you’ll be lucky if Missa is even mentioned in a “qsmp” SBI fic. Etoiles? Not even mentioned despite him and Phil more or less actually leaning into the family dynamic with the “brothers” thing. Even Tallulah and Chayanne are left out or mischaracterized in “qsmp” SBI fics, giving Tommy the spotlight.

You won’t find nearly anybody who isn’t an English cc in these fics, and this is NOT accusing anyone of xenophobia. It’s most likely just because the SBI people are used to watching only Phil or only Wilbur and they don’t speak enough of the other languages to really care about the non-English ccs and thus disregard their characters and lore. It’s not just SBI people who do this, it’s plenty of people speaking every language on the server not watching anyone whose languages they don’t speak. Yk?

But that brings us to q!Cellbit, and I’m surprised the SBI guys have latched onto him the way they did considering he’s everything they seem to dislike: his first language isn’t English, he doesn’t talk with Phil a lot, he and Tallulah get along really well, he makes fun of Wilbur being gone. And, honestly? The SBI guys did hate him for a long time because of those things, they constantly undermined his efforts and said Phil would be a better Order leader and said that he should never speak to Tallulah again because he was making her sad and he’s friends with their least favorite person ever, Forever.

But then q!Phil said he trusted Cellbit, and it’s like a switch was flipped. Starting around the Pills Arc when they first teamed up, SBI people were suddenly on board with Cellbit despite being part of the haters literally days before. Why? Well. Phil and Cellbit are friends now, and so now he gets the privilege of being in the fics.

The problem with this is that these people have never watched Cellbit. They’ve seen ten minutes of him total from Phil’s pov, and that’s all they’re going to use to write his character. So of course there will be mischaracterization.

And, of course, they’ll be family. Because, as I said, there’s this weird allergy to the concept of friendship in SBI fics. You’re family or you’re an enemy.

Constant fanon mischaracterization of Phil has basically turned him into a universal father figure even if he doesn’t have that dynamic with the characters he’s like the “father” of. q!Cellbit’s only familial figure outside of his actual canon family is generally seen as q!Bad, who even referred to him as family last night on stream. But, because Phil and Cellbit are friends now and Cellbit is younger than Phil is, they have to have a father-son dynamic, because that’s what Phil’s only character trait is in the SBI fics he’s in. He’s the dad whether it makes sense or not.

If that makes sense.

[jumpscaregoose]

hello wonderful mutual, may i inquire what shaman king is?

you've triggered an unskippable cutscene be prepared. was it me calling hana kentacoded that did it for you

shaman king is uh... certainly something

editor's note I go on about the history of the shaman king media franchise for like. way too long and I'm not deleting it so. plot summary starts after the flowers anime image

it started out as a shonen adventure manga created by a mangaka named hiroyuki takei which ran from 1998 to 2004, where it somehow Ate Shit And Died, leaving the manga ending unfinished somehow (idk I wasn't there)

it got its first anime adaptation in 2001

this anime had 64 episodes and covered a complete story. hey goose but if it aired in 2001 and the manga ate shit in 2004 how did they- they didn't. they made shit up. remember kanata dying on the cross? take that extend it to cover half the story and make it FUCKING AWESOME

shaman king 2001 has this impeccable Vibe to it that I really love (the only other thing I can think of with similar impeccable Vibes is sk8). a lot of fans prefer this anime to the manga and I can't blame them it sure has its perks. it also has its downsides. which is mostly terrible dated character designs and diverging from the manga if you're not into that.

I love this show though this is what I rewatch when I want any old shaman king in my spare time

but what's this? a whisper on the wind? that's right baby

SHAMAN KING KANZENBAN MANGA

that's right- between 2008 and 2009 the entire manga was reprinted to get its "true ending", including redraws of some panels

later in 2012 BAM SHAMAN KING FLOWERS

yes there's a full mainline sequel. flowers itself ended in 2014 when the magazine it was in Ate Shit and Died. the story was continued in another manga, The Super Star, before last year the magazine publishing TSS, say it with me now,

Ate Shit and Died (yeah Takei has real bad luck with that)

and then, just a few years ago...

BAM SHAMAN KING 2021 REBOOT ANIME

finally, an anime adaptation of the kanzenban manga, true ending including... this is where I show up. finally! I needed something to watch on a long car ride in august 2021 and happened to download the first eight episodes on netflix, a decision which would have no repercussions on my life philosophies or me as a person (lies)

there are pretty mixed feelings about this anime overall (the pacing goes fucking BRRRRRRR that's for sure) but I can credit that thing with getting me into shaman king and restructuring my brain so it has a special place in my heart

(it's also what I first get people to watch when they agree to shaman king with me. you should really read kanzenban instead because it's better)

lastly there's the flowers anime airing right now

(yay excitingggggg)

and like. soooooo many more sequel prequel and spinoff manga. and also all of takei's works (I'm planning to read ultimo soon because someone said that's where the spirit based on the vermilion bird came from and that has a common ancestor with allen sugasano so I'm going) oh shit and funkuro/funbari chronicles the mobile game that is either closed or on its way out. and so much more

I'm not going to explain every one of them because I realized you probably wanted. a plot summary. so

copy pasted from my mankin slideshow:

"laid-back Asakura Yoh is a shaman, someone with a connection to the afterlife. He participates in the Shaman Fight, a tournament to determine the next god. Hao, a mysterious and overwhelmingly strong shaman, wants to use the powers gained from becoming a god to wipe out humanity. Shenanigans ensue across multiple continents and the boundaries of life and death."

like I said before it's a shonen adventure manga so it follows a lot of tropes, but I think it does them pretty well and in its own way. if you read through the entire mainline manga (kanzenban, flowers, and tss) it's clear takei has a lot to say through his work and he's pretty explicit about his view of the world (shoutout to evil triangle who invented capitalism)

takei's writing and research can be kinda iffy at times and I would never say his work is for everyone but I love it to bits and it has really helped me out over the years

my personal favourite pieces of shaman king media (besides kanzenban) are:

Red Crimson (spinoff of the main sequels following an adult legacy cast, brilliant story about love and grief except for the Horrors)

& a Garden (prequel spinoff about the hanagumi witches, side characters from the first manga)

2001 anime (explained this one already)

if this has interested you go read the kanzenban manga and then come back for sequel recommendations

need more information? I got you

my beginner's shaman king slideshow (if you're reading this within an hour of posting you might see me updating it dw about that)

the patch cafe fansite which has up to date news about the entire series

there's also the funbari hill discord's tumblr account, which reblogs a lot of great shaman king stuff. everyone there is lovely and it's a great community (it's actually run by a mutual of mine hi frost 👋)

I ALMOST FORGOT THE SEQUELS FANSITE WHOOPS (run by an incredible artist and has some fun information about the sequels)

please tell me if you want clarification or more specifics I'm bad at explaining this concisely