#more like coward throuple

[dragons-socks]

Is this a throuple or just a couple and the attention whore they’re suddenly responsible for?

[imogenkol]

Lysistrata “Lys” de Riva 🐦‍⬛

[template]

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[richeeduvie]

Dp with princesa on face nacho in his lap and Lalo from behind 🙁😍

does dp stand for dickplay

[the-bi-space-ace]

I’m a simple man. I see three characters with lives that are so intertwined, filled with so much tension, so much passion, that removing one from the equation seems unfathomable and then I point and yell “THROUPLE!” At the top of my lungs.

[nny11writes]

You know what? I like your version more and that’s now exactly what happened!

Glimmer has a sixth sense when Catra is about to say something so incredibly stupid that it literally hurts her across space-time. If this was a film or animated thing every time Catra insists on something painfully dumb, you would see Glimmer glaring the background or a reflection or something.

This was probably one of those parking lot fights at a waffle house or a dennys or something. The starting to date and/or Catra insisting someone has to be the class clown, either works.

[iam-anordinary-human-orami]

I really want a scene like this in tsc2 where Neil seems to call Jean more often to check up on him and the floozies are perplexed "Why is Josten calling you?" "You guys close or sth?" "You still haven't told us what happened when he whisked you away" "we are worried sick Jean, how can you keep us in the dark?" And then Cat will say sth like "are you not sharing what you're talking to Josten about cause you're embarrassed?" Jeremy being a worried mother hen "is he bothering you?" And Jean keeps shutting everything down telling them not to worry, and then Laila as a joke says "is he flirting with you?"

And Jean responds with "I hope not. I don't think his boyfriend would take it well"

Everyone immediately stops what they are doing. "Im sorry, his WHAT?"

All hell breaks lose. Cat is shaking Laila "Josten is FRUITY?!", Jeremy is like "He has a boyfriend?" Laila being like "in the year that he joined the foxes and almost died in the hands of his serial killer dad, he got a boyfriend??? How???" And then Cat and Laila start asking questions, Jeremy trying to calm them down but also being curious, Jean is like "Well he's not told me explicitly, but it's obvious."

Jeremy having an epiphany "oh my god. Is it Kevin?" Cat in the background "oh please let it be Kevin" Jean says no, "Kevin is too much of a coward", the floozies are looking at each other like "oh we are definitely unpacking THAT at some point". And then they're like okay, well maybe the boyfriend is not on the team. But Jean confirms, it's a fox, i can tell u who it is-' "NO! We need to figure this one out!" "Let our gaydar do the work Jean we got things to prove!" Jean tiredly: "to who?"

So they start guessing, oh Hemmick is undeniably fruity, Jean is like "I don't even know who that is. Oh, backliner? No, not him". "Maybe it's Boyd?!" Cat being like "Escandalo! Cause he's with the captain right? Wilds?" Laila commenting "He'd be out of his mind to pass on that, and this is the educated opinion of a lesbian", Jean is like "how come u guys know all their names?" Jeremy says "they are a small team and it's hard not to keep tabs on them when they are in the news cycle every week or so"

"Guys we're losing track, keep your heads locked in! Who could be Josten's boyfriend, that tonight's pressing question!" "But there's no one else... wait, is he with the other backliner? Short blonde?" "I'm gonna be honest, I don't get queer vibes from him" "Lol can u imagine it's actually the goalkeeper twin" "what the one that went to juvie and looks like hes one step away from biting our heads off on the court? Nahh". Jean looks at an invisible camera like he's in the office.

And then something happens and they forget about it, until like the winter banquet or some shit and Cat is intently looking at Neil trying to decipher who his boyfriend could be, maybe he is in a throuple with Wilds and Boyd? Jean is like "Why are you looking at the foxes' table so intently?" "It's investigative work, don't worry about it" and then Neil comes over and takes Jean away at the open bar to talk about sth, the floozies are pretending to not be looking at them. Neil notices and he's like "I see they taken claim already." Jean responds with "It's not what u think" and they talk, Andrew probably gets bored at some point and goes to Neil, puts a single hand on his lower back and Jean being able to hear commotion in the Trojans table turns to see them acting like "normal", except their poses look rehearsed, there's drinks that have been spilled on the table and Cat is drinking from an empty glass looking at the sky.

[herrinarte]

The ACOTAR fandom is so weird because what do you mean Tamsand isn’t one of the most popular ships 🤨 Tamlin is literally on Rhysand’s mind 24/7, either this man is massively insecure, gay as fuck for Tamlin or massively insecure about the fact that Tamlin ain’t fuckin him right now and could be with someone else so he has the uncontrollable urge to tell his ex-boyfriend to kill himself. How are people not saying this is gay????

And then there’s whatever the hell is going on with the bat boys. Fucking in the same room? What you just gonna stare at each other? go one step further and just do it with each other. Stop being a coward bro 😤✋

And Azriel choking Eris, uh it’s just floor play. Don’t worry it’s cool, they have a list of dos and don’t that they made when they got married.

How can you look at Lucien ‘fire in his blood’ Vanserra and Tamlin ‘literally a big ass beast’ and go no I don’t think they have had nasty passionate sex under under a cherry blossom tree 🤓 like huh????? They’re literally roommates. Lucien lost an eye for Tamlin. Tamlin felt more betrayal over loosing Lucien than Feyre. YOUR HONOUR THEY ARE IN LOVE

Then the Valkyries…um gay too. Lesbian throuple. Come on people get creative. The girls are kissing and cuddling and having beautiful sex and you are all boring.

I have never seen a fandom go so feral for dry ass ships in my life. Literally no other fandom would ignore the plethora of gay ships.

This is your sign to stop caring about what is canon and start being fun, cool and interesting xxx

[girl-lostconnection]

hallo love your work it's so delicious. I also love how you show emotions. I wanted to tickle your brain for a sec if you don't mind (no pressure). What would happen in your AUs (like the acceleration au) if the reader was more um- violate like when simon decides oh this stranger yep he's going in the bed with us, (even if mind you she was chill about the strange man before if a bit hurt) she gets stern and simply tells him to get out of her house. That if he wants to bring his soldier fine- but that is not her problem that is her home her life. Also I saw you had a fic of gaz with what was basically a gym rat reader and omggggg it's so muahhh. I love strong reader.

Finally got to your ask, anon. So I’ve been thinking about it for a couple of days now.

I think the reason why Reader doesn’t outright put her foot down or why nothing too rash actually happens from ANY side of their throuple is from how slow it all burns. The temperature is going up degree by degree, so the frog doesn’t jump out of the pot.

Now, if Simon tried to ram his way through her stating clearly and plainly that she’s uncomfortable with something, than yes, it would be a recipe for a disaster.

But yk the AU works only because these guys listen to each other. Simon knows Reader and Reader knows Simon and Johnny knows Simon and Simon knows Johnny and Johnny tries to know Reader.

The AU works because they try to get attuned to each other and not because one or all of them try to forcefully slot themselves into each other’s lives.

I get where your question is coming from, I’m just explaining my thought process behind the structure of their relationship.

So their relationship however strange it may seem works because they are adults that while have some unhealthy attachments or coping mechanisms are still capable of processing their own emotions and giving each other space.

I know that I don’t go into too much of a detail exactly how it works/feels/goes between them but for me personally that’s part of it. In life for me oftentimes relationships can get complicated and sometimes you do in fact realise that the person you called best friend for years is actually the person you love.

Also, sometimes when coming from a not very fortunate or healthy family you may not know how different types of love feel like. You have no model to take example from so yeah, sometimes it’s a lot of stumbling around and nuzzling into people and taking time a shit ton of time to figure it all out.

And while I get that Simon may seem really annoying to some people, for me he’s actually really endearing because in this AU I understand him perfectly. He’s a man, he has some issues he never worked through, he dislikes conflicts and tries to avoid them, he takes the coward’s way out because he hopes maybe things will fall into place on their own.

And I understand Reader because she loved him all her life, she never said it, she always dreamed about the life that she wasn’t brave enough to live, she’s really jealous that Soap was brave enough to do what she didn’t, she feels ashamed that she’s jealous, she made mistakes, she hates that she did, she is difficult and isn’t sure she’s worth this much trouble. It’s okay, she is. You are. All the trouble and effort.

All worth it.

And I understand Soap. I think I understand him the best out of them all. He’s jealous, he’s used to work himself to the bone, he’s incredible aware, he’s insecure, he’s feeling like he could be left behind (he wouldn’t be), he likes Simon, he likes Reader, he has different needs than Simon or Reader have and he’s not sure how to voice them. He’s there but is he really present? Is he wanted? Is he needed? Is he loved? He isn’t sure. He doesn’t know whether he should ask.

So the thing is that they are all difficult and complicated and multidimensional and honestly, I love the three of them so so much.

Even if they stress you, guys, out sometimes

[morallysuperiorlips]

4 (Oddly) Specific Types of Relationship Dynamics That Are GUARANTEED to Make Your Story More Interesting!

1.) Friends with Benefits to Enemies to Lovers: Let's be real. We ALL love a good enemies to lovers moment (it's easily one of my most loved tropes, hands down). But, a great way to really charge up that underlying hate that eventually flourishes into the perfect romance is by giving your characters a relationship before they became enemies...not just friends in this case, but friends with benefits. With that specificity, there's also a pre-existing sexual relationship that might really help in charging those negative feelings toward one another. Like, they were already intimate, and have seen those very private things about one another, but now they're fighting? Woof.

2.) Friends That Are Deeply in (Platonic) Love: No, I'm not talking friends to lovers. I'm talking friends that are just simply platonically in love. There's nothing sexual about their relationship, and there isn't really anything inherently romantic about it either, but they might show their love in ways that might traditionally be seen as "romantic." Intimate hugs, cuddling, saying "I love you so much," etc. I feel like I don't see this enough in written friendships and think it's wonderful for two characters to be so connected in a way that's not inherently sexual or traditionally romantic. GIVE US MORE PLATONIC ROMANCE!

3.) The Love Triangle...But They All Love Each Other: This is for my OT3/poly homies out there. This one made the list so I could scream it from the rooftops: IF YOU HAVE A LOVE TRIANGLE, MAKE THEM ALL BE IN LOVE WITH EACH OTHER, COWARDS. OTHERWISE, IT'S JUST AN ANGLE, AND THAT'S NOT FUN FOR ANYONE. The concept of a love "triangle" is so overdone, and now we're in a new era--show me the throuple. Show me them trying to get over their feelings for one another and they just can't. Show me the complications of it all. Show me how they come to terms with loving two different people. Show me how they make it work. Show me how they show their love for one another in their non-traditional way. Nobody will see it coming and if your readers are anything like me, they'll appreciate you for it.

4.) Close-Knit Established Couples That Have Already Gone Through the Wringer: It's kind of crazy, but I haven't read a lot about established couples that already have a past of their relationship bonds being tested. It's always about the fresh new couples on the scene, and while I'm all for it, I love a couple that's already gone through some shit and are already fortified against whatever else is coming their way. Of course, that shouldn't stop you from throwing them back to the metaphorical sharks again, but I feel like it will be substantially more interesting to watch a couple who has already fought for one another (and won) do it all over again. How to they fare in comparison to a fresh couple? Are they annoyed about it? Or maybe they find it amusing because "been there, done that"?

As always, GO WRITE SOMETHING TODAY! <3

[ancientcosmicentity]

So, I'm rewatching Criminal Minds, soooooo, here's my character sexuality headcannons and ships and why.

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Character sexuality headcannons:

Gideon - straight, somewhere in the aromantic spectrum

Rossi - straight but experimented

Hotch - bicon w/preference for women

Elle - bisexual lesbian (i know, controversial)

JJ - bi girlie

Prentiss - lesbian queen

(Jemily, my beloved)

Reid - bi (cannon if they weren't cowards)

Morgan - bicon part 2 electric bugaloo

Luke - pansexual, demiromantic babes

Garcia - pan/lesbian/queer (leaning slightly more queer)

Reasons:

Gideon -

He doesn't radiate sad gay old man vibes like some others (cough cough hotch cough cough) but he definitely isn't entirely straight either, I feel like he takes a minute to grow a connection and it's that connection he needs to pursue a healthy relationship. So probs demiromantic (maybe i project, sue me !! I want more demi romantic characters) but could also fall on other areas of the aromantic spectrum.

Rossi -

Similar to Gideon, doesn't radiate the same gay old man vibes and I loved his relationship with hayden (joys mum). However, he is canonically a kinky bastard in his youth, and he most definitely had no qualms about fucking around with guys, he wasn't attracted to them and is instead just one hell of an ally who was also heavily involved in queer and kink scenes.

Hotch -

SAD OLD GAY MAN VIBES !! I do enjoy his relationship with haley, and i know he can have had a strong fulfilling relationship with a women without being attracted to her, but I do think he is attracted to women. But he also just radiates sad gay dad there fore 💫bicon hotch💫. Also, he was a troubled teen in an all boys boarding school...I will die on the fact he was a bit of a whore in his youth before haley, I wish we had more on his backstory and what the timeline was but in my head - all boys boarding school for most of his early and mid teenage years before meeting haley late/final year of highschool post transfer - I can't remember if that is even possible with what we know in show but I don't care !! Also, defo had a little thing for garcias friend in the Halloween episode when he gets Jack's costume.

Elle -

I didn't know what I thought she would be at first cuz like she defo loves women but she does have a thing with men then it struck me, both !! She defo would fuck a man but would not want a relationship with one/has no romantic attraction to them. Women on the other hand, she with eat their pussy and put a ring on it at the same time like a true queer icon. I know it's a controversial label but also, they're fiction characters and want to make fun head cannons with fun words !!

JJ -

She just is. Like, I could write a whole essay on the parallels of queerness with JJ, but I'm already yapping excessively and those video essays already exist sooooo I'll let them be lol. Also, i love jemily so much but NO ONE TALKS BAD ABOUT WILL LAMONTAGUE JNR. his and JJs relationship is so cute so I shall multi ship and throuple these mother fuckers as much as I please.

Prentiss -

Literally the OG man hating lesbian and I love her for it. She has never been attracted to a man in her life and i shall die on that hill. Emily prentiss, know I love you deeply.

Reid -

Literally the most stereotypical bisexual to bisexual. And I love him for it. Like, he likes women, but he had more chemistry with Ethan in a SINGLE EPISODE than with JJ (jeid, my UNbeloved) I love my bisexual nerd.

Morgan -

I won't even lie to you this is mostly for angst and hurt/comfort purposes. He lost his father young and took on the role as 'man of the house' incredibly young, then their was C*rl B*ford, and I just love a self realisation fic where he comes to terms with the fact that he is allowed to be attracted to men and that not discount his past trauma and be COMFORTED FOR IT !!! don't get me wrong, all the characters (especially reid) have gone through it, but please!! Give me some morgan-centric fics where he gets comforted and it not delve into other characters trauma. I love reid but please, I need morgan centric hurt/comfort fics where he doesn't act uncharacteristically violently.

Luke -

Ngl, this is entirely vibes. There's nothing I can point to for 'evidence' or 'proper' reasoning, it is just straight up vibes and I choose to stand by it.

Garcia -

This is where I struggle !! Cuz like, she is definitely not straight and I kinda want to say she's a lesbian but I love her relationships with kevin and I love galvez so much. So maybe pan cuase I think i have put too many as bi lol but I also think maybe she would just be unlabelled and 'queer' (let me project onto my  favourite characters okay !!), so probs leaning more towards queer but still up in the air.

Just a little extra here. Hotches stint as a whore, and JJ in a throuple aren't meant to be comments on bisexuality as an identity. For hotch, i just love the trope of very stoic/serious/otherwise unsuspecting character being a whore on the past mostly then for the accidental 'oh, during this very important situation and the person whose important we must talk to I have slept with fuck' moments I love ngl. And I just love both JJ and wills and JJ and Emily as ships and want them all together and happy and see next section for further reasoning. Just got worried on case this fell into any stereotypes of bi people being 'greedy' or unable to have committed relationships or being known for sleeping around. It was not intended !!

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Ships I like and why:

• Jemily

A classic. They're so fucking close and so cute with eachother. They lean on eachother and know nigh everything about eachother even stuff they have been told not to share. I love them together and they'd be fucking precious together!!

• JJ × Will

A cannon straight ship I like. This is highly unusual. I love will with JJ, and honestly just Will as a character. They're relationship and family together is so sweet and cute and I love them as a couple I won't lie. Also male wife × girlboss

• Emily × JJ × Will

I do ship them both speratley but do love a good throuple ship. JJ with her wife and husband, living her best life. I love both these ships and have never been a fan of infidelity trope in fic, and honestly, I want to see wine besties Will and Emily cuz they so would be. They would both put their lives on the line for JJ and that creates a base if respect and trust between them.

• Galvez

I LOVE PENELOPE AND LUKE !!!! I love how garcia is cold at first to him and stand offish and Luke just puppy wags tail 'she's so cool' 'I've heard she's so nice' I love it !! They're precious together and I'm so mad they didn't go through with it in the og 15 seasons (reboot don't let me down on this)

• Morgan and garcia QPR

I do love Morgan and garcia but I don't like them as a romantic couple. I love their violently flirty yet platonic friendship HOWEVER !!! I do love them as a queer platonic relationship. They're is something there that is more than platonic but not romantic and I also just want more QPR stuff in media (including fan media) also: shout out to my irl QPP cuz she will get her appreciation !!! Love you babes (even tho you'll probs not see this)

For next section, just know i stand heavily by SHIP AND LET SHIP. I don't like these for my own reason, if you do SLAY !! I love that for you. But for me, it's just not a fave.

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Ships I don't like and why:

• Jeid

...why? Just why? Reid had a small crush on her in SEASON 1 then she confesses to being in love with Reid in SEASON 14!! there was no build up, or even really mention on it between that time, including which JJ getting a husband and family and Reid going through his love life with Maeve and that whole situation. I like them more as brother and sister type vibe.

• Anyone on the team with Hotch, Rossi, or Gideon

I just don't like it. They all feel like the parents of the team so them shipped with anyone else feels icky to me.

[pharawee]

Favorite Kiss Game

Rules: create a poll with five nine of your all time favorite onscreen kisses, setting any standard for qualification you choose. Then tag more friends to join in!

I was tagged by @lurkingshan & @he-is-lightning-in-a-bottle. Thank you so much! 💜💜 I just had a look at my most recent gif folder because the moment someone asks me my favourites I forget everything I ever watched. These moments speak to me though or I wouldn't have wrestled photoshop for hours to turn them into gifs. 🙏

1. Sun & Q (7 Days Before Valentine) aka the artsy existential kiss.

2. Ken & Seiji & Japan (Deep Night) aka the "baby's first throuple" daydream kiss that was way better than what we actually got in the end.

3. Him & Nail (For Him) aka the "the production company is dead to me but these two ate" kiss.

4. Thanwa & Peak (Knock Knock, Boys!) aka the "they literally kissed in a closet and it was the most beautiful thing I've ever seen" kiss.

5. Pete & Kenta (Pit Babe) aka the "this chaste little kiss changed my whole brain chemistry and I shall now sit here consumed with headcanons for the rest of my life" kiss.

6. Prom & Nont (Playboyy) aka the "kiss me like I'm my missing twin" kiss.

7. Achi & Ji (To Be Continued) aka the "fcking finally!!" kiss.

8. Sprite & First (Twins) aka the "this show doesn't even deserve FrameRyan GIVE THEM ANOTHER SERIES YOU COWARDS" kiss.

9. Wayu & Jao (Two Worlds) aka the "uhm didn't you just impale your leg in a death trap oh ok then good for you" kiss.

I'm tagging: @sanvees @sparklyeyedhimbo @bunnakit @zhouxiangs @bengiyo

and also (what's up with tumblr not tagging correctly?)

@visualtaehyun @leonpob @benkaaoi @markmybirds (please ignore if you've been tagged before or don't want to do this 💜)

[davekat-sucks]

The one net positive that harenglishcrockberts have with being treated with less attention by Homestuck is they get marginally better fates in postcanon than in canon.

So we have the Strilondes:

Dirk: literally becomes a sulking evil hypergod who isolates himself on a dirtball manyfacturing a destiny where he must die from Dave’s sword. So far he has done nothing cool or ironic.

Dave: had his 2 major relationships ruined and turned into a robot slave of calliope in candy, and in meat is a nothing character devoid of any relevance.

Rose: unfaithful wife and spineless “friend” to Jade in candy, and is nothing more than a robot assistant and nagging critic of dirk. Removed of authority and damned to villainy.

Roxy: got off the hook easy. Essentially a pink Dave in meat, and an ex-housewife and secretive ally to the troll cause in candy. Just don’t ask meat Roxy who she voted for in the 5016 presidential elections.

Now, the Prospitan humans, and their fates.

John: well he does lose his house and ends up becoming a depressed aimless coward but when you read the above descriptions he got off easy the most. I’d rather be a depressed weight than a robot slave or a god-chud

Jade: possessed for a while in meat, but then freed herself, gets to stay in irrelevant background with dave and karkat, as a functioning platonic throuple (i’m coping) In candy she’s a touch-starved homewrecker who gets killed, but at least she’s not Dirk who only has the evil version of himself survive.

Jake: I forgot what happened to meat Jade and I don’t care. In candy he’s the trophy husband to the president and even grew some balls and tried to tell her off. He’s one of the few characters in postcanon that consistently progresses in his character arc, rather than regress (like John and Dirk) become entirely different than what’s in canon (Jane) or just become a flanderized caricature of who they are (Karkat)

Jane: literally rules the world with an iron fist. Married the love of her life, had a kid, had an affair with Gamzee, rich as fuck, millions loyal to her, and unmatched in her rule over Earth C. Ironically the character with the least development in all the human cast gets the most development and happiest ending in the clusterfuck of postcanon.

The lesson here is: try not to be relevant to canon, otherwise you will inevitably become doomed by the narrative.

Rose as a Light Player should make her not as relevant in meta sense. But that also may be because Vriska is here and she is also a Light Player. So all the more relevance goes to her instead of Rose.

[sharkyy599]

Stop the Poly Propaganda!

Hey! I know you don’t want to hear from me anymore but it’s important you do to avoid harm to other people. I know it is not intentional but by posting about your poly relationship, you’re promoting cheating and unfaithful practices. If one partner is not enough, then they’re just not the one. Nobody should not need two or three or ten partners and you should not continue promoting this unhealthy lifestyle. It’s just leading to heartbreak, mental illness, and even health concerns. If you don’t want to listen to me, you should at least do your own research on it.

Wow…

You really cooked and served…

Absolutely nothing 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Like why the hell are you even telling me this?? Are you seriously trying to tell me that I’m promoting “uNhEaLtHy PrAcTiCeS” by posting about three OCs in a throuple to my VERY TINY AUDIENCE?? 😭😭

LITERALLY NO ONE KNOWS WHO I AM BRO

Also, even if you do convince me that being in a poly relationship is unhealthy, even if any of my followers agree that it’s unhealthy

I DO NOT CARE

I’m sorry, I don’t care 😭😭 it’s not incest and it’s not pedophilia, it’s three consenting adults all deciding to date each other- who gives a fuck??

If people are in poly relationships and they’re not happy, then that’s NOT my fault (or any other poly artist’s fault) and that’s not what I’m promoting!

I have OCs who are criminals and keep it secret from their partners. I do NOT think that’s healthy at all and I do NOT support that for anyone in real life.

Do not expect any more responses from me bro, unless you stop being a coward and just stop asking anonymously, this is the only response you’re getting from me 🥱🥱🥱🥱🥱

[a-problematic-writer]

Quick fire controversial takes to stir the pot (affectionately, I am not actually trying to start drama I just wanna throw out some random takes I have) 💚💚💚

Petra’s a bisexual. 100%. Like… look at them. That’s a bisexy if I’ve ever seen one.

This one’s less controversial but Petra’s a she/they. I don’t make the rules. Her and Aiden swap clothes a lot, fight me about it 💚💚💚

I prefer Lukrose (Lukas/Cassie Rose) to Aidrose! This actually came about because Aiden/Cassie Rose is actually not a new ship!! It’s been popular for quite some time! And it annoyed me and my friends to NO END (affectionately!) because Aidrose and Lukesse were the big contenders and we liked Aidesse. So we made a funny where Aidrose and Lukesse went on a blind double date and ended up becoming Aidesse and Lukrose. I’ll have to clean up that fic sometime haha!

Axden rules, actually, y’all are just mean. SO DOES LUXEL (Lukas/Axel)

I don’t like Soren 😭 He’s slimy and icky to me. Please, by all means, if you do please keep loving him wholeheartedly. I’m just unfortunately a hater.

In that vein, ivorren I agree was a thing. However, it is toxic yaoi to me. Ivor’s happier with Harper. We love a bi king and his bi queen.

LUKTRA SLAYS YOU GUYS NEED TO STOP SLEEPING ON THEM; I’LL START WAVING THEIR FLAG SO HARD JUST GIVE ME A REASON.

Axel and Maya would be SUCH a goated BROTP like she’s the vicious teacup chihuahua to his scary biker dude, y’know? If you get me, I love you. If you don’t, I’m sorry 😭

Jetra (M!Jesse/Petra) and Lukesse (F!Jesse/Lukas) slay so hard I need more content.

I don’t like Male Jesse 😭😭😭 there’s like legit no reason he’s fine but I can only see Remi Ratatouille when he speaks and I just don’t like him [m!Jesse], personally. There ARE exceptions of course! I love fan M!Jesse’s 🥰🥰🥰 but in the long run: Fem!Jesse is Best Jesse 🫶🫶🫶

No, this does NOT mean I like Cat Taber (Zionist L). I actually prefer fan voice claims better! Please, if you have any, send them my way omg…

Aidetra (Aiden/Petra) is so good I would like to dine on it everyday

STOP MAKING AIDEN THE VILLAIN YOU COWARDS. Lukas deserves to be one too 💚💚💚

THROUPLE ADMINS IS GOATED

This isn’t controversial but Stella TOTALLY used to hang out with the Ocelots and always had a big crush on Petra. Fight me. I think she and Aiden also dated briefly but that’s neither here nor there.

Dewey likes Aiden. Lukas is gonna die about it some day.

I think Aiden and Lukas being exes is just subtext at this point, not even a headcanon. They WERE TOGETHER, THEY DID BREAKUP.

No one in this game is canonically related. Ship who you want. This is coming from someone who’s a staunch believer in Aiden and Maya as siblings.

I actually don’t mind Jesse x Jesse. NOW AS A DISCLAIMER NOT IN THE SELFCEST WAY. I just mean like a lot of the time, I use Jesse variations to build up a sort of OC?? So like I see no reason they can’t be shipped together 😭😭😭

AIDESSE IS THE BEST SHIP EVER U CANNOT CONVINCE ME OTHERWISE ITS GOT EVERYTHING. IT CAN BE SO MUCH ALL YOU GOTTA DO IS BELIEVE.

[clonerightsagenda]

Finishing up the show! (As you saw, lol)

Episode 7:

Asriel: I fucking hate prophecies as plot devices. Me: same man

Technobabble? In His Dark Materials? Shut up about your capacitors

Hey, it was Mrs. Coulter's idea to beat Metatron, and now they're having Asriel and Xaphania tip her off. Stolen valor

"Brute physical force!" has been a family injoke for years so when Asriel announced he was going to defeat the angels with "sheer physical force" we all started screaming

"It's not just death down there" just reminds me of that tumblr post about how SFF invents Death 2: A Worse One

I've said it before but one more for the road... the witches look so silly

Well lads they did what I worried they'd do - focus a lot of time and energy on the war that explicitly thematically does not matter.

Why do Asriel's troops even have guns. Can you shoot an angel

Mrs. Coulter's control over the specters was vague in the books beyond that she played them like she plays everyone else, convincing them she could lead them to better prey. I do not know why she can now explode them with her mind

Serafina that bird skull is not flattering. And I say this as a skull connoisseur

God: *telepathically says shit* Mrs. Coulter: Another fucking man trying to tell me what to do

Metatron's leather suit??? Did he get himself confused with Metatton?

Mrs. Coulter didn't hit him with a rock : ( Also Stelmaria pushed them all into the pit instead of her. Kind of a bummer. Wondering what the metaphysical implications are of *her* daemon dying outside the rift rather than in it, though. Also my notes for this scene include the scribbled phrase 'cursed throuple'. I just thought you should know

Well God dying was appropriately anticlimactic I guess although I would have preferred if Will and Lyra weren't in the thick of All That

(My mom: Why aren't they going to the other world?? Why are they still in the war zone? My dad: Because they're stupid. Me: Don't blame them. It's not their fault. The TV show is doing this to them.)

Episode 8:

New scene of Lyra processing her parents' death - even posthumously they are still taking up screentime

You go to the land of the dead and through a war zone and into Eden and that PhD you met months ago just happens to be there. Wild tbh

Mary is a lesbian! Good for her! Does Lyra understand the concept of lesbians or is she baffled by this whole exchange

They cut the "The Christian religion is a very powerful and convincing mistake" line. Cowards

My mom: Will, do something about that bandage. He has gangrene. Me: He said she smelled bad but it's his hand rotting. (We then remembered they made the timeskip several months and were like... why does he still have bandages on)

Kirjava isn't black :(

Honestly the 'good' angels are coming off even worse in the TV version. yeah you did what we needed you to do so you're done now! We no longer grant you our grace to read the alethiometer because you're no longer of use to us! Go fuck yourself. Ironically her 'falling' does make her a used up and no longer valuable woman to them.... probably not the intended reading but here we are

Send help my parents keep calling the mulefa muffalettas

I joked that when Lyra said she was imagining what Will will look like when he's old he should've whipped out his phone and gone there's a snapchat filter for that

We then spent the last few minutes heckling Will for occasionally having all his fingers in some shots

I was already on the edge but just said "what the fuck?? what the fuck is that?????" for the ending with the like... based on a true story documentary text overlay for Where They Are Now. Why did they do that

[mariejordans]

I agree Jordan Marie and cate are the best most interesting characters if they're going to kill someone it should be Andre like you said he's useless and also unlikable as a person lmfao he ain't doing anything right. I love cate and I love villains so whatever way they go with her as long as it's believable I'm all for it. My thing with them killing more characters is because we're in the endgame now as in the boys probably has 2 more seasons to go and they're also going to start killing a lot of people like by the end I expect most of the main supes and at least half of the boys to be dead so as the gen v characters get pulled into that they're also going to start getting killed off but idc they better not touch Jordan and Marie I'm not kidding I already have hives thinking about stranger things maybe killing Steve in the last season I don't need this 😂😂😂😂

right EXACTLY jordan marie cate 🔛🔝

i genuinely didn’t expect them to pivot on cate’s character bc i really thought they’d stick with cate wanting to be good/wanting to be a hero, trying to earn her friends’ trust back, but i’m SOOO glad that they’re going the villain/anti-hero route. especially with marie and cate now on opposing sides and them basically being each other’s narrative foils, like i need them to go full on villain with cate like it’s just too good a set up for a really complex relationship between marie and cate.

*sighs* okay so my thing with andre is that he COULD’VE been a really interesting character. like, daddy issues, bisexual, doesn’t really care about being a superhero and lowkey in love with his best friend (the writers are cowards for not making the throuple happen) like there were so many ways his character could’ve been done, but then he ended up being a stereotypical nepo baby. it’s kinda like the writers put little to no effort in his character development and didn’t even try to make him likable 😭 he just constantly gets thrown around by the other characters, he slept with his best friend’s girlfriend, and he’s just kind of a dick in general. really the only thing i found really genuine and likable about andre was his love for luke, and to a certain extent, cate. but beyond that, he’s just not a very sympathetic character to me idk 😭

honestly, i’m not suuper attached to any of the boys characters, maybe it’s bc i always end up taking super long breaks between binge watching but if they decided to start killing off main characters, i think i’d be fine (except kimchie or starlight pls don’t touch them thx) but THEY BETTER NOT TOUCH MARIE OR JORDAN OR I’M STARTING A RIOT IN THE PRIME VIDEO BUILDING FR like you could even take cate from me just dont touch limoreau…

i’m gonna be honest, i kinda wish gen v was less tied into the boys and got to stand on its own more bc i really need homelander to stay FARRRRRR away from marie and jordan and cate. butcher too. but also bc i really liked the college setting but seeing as how we now know the entire college is a scam, it might completely move away from godolkin, which is a shame bc i loved the superhero college-sky high esque concept of it and i wish we had gotten MORE of it before we got into all the plot heavy stuff but…it is what it is ig 🤷🏼‍♀️