#mobei-jun: daddy?

[disgracefulthings]

Luo Binghe, to Shen Qingqiu: Wife~

Shen Qingqiu, covering his face: Binghe! Don't call me that in public!!

Lan Wangji, to Wei Wuxian: Wife.

Wei Wuxian: Lan Zhan! You're soo shameless~

Hua Cheng, to Xie Lian: Wi-

Hua Cheng: No, I can't disrespect gege this way

Xie Lian: Don't worry San Lang! You can be my wife!!

Hua Cheng: Gege is so smart

[nibbelraz]

I completely forgot about the second "Daddy Airplane" incident

[happypeachsludgeflower]

Just saw an svsss fic tagged “kiss kiss fall in love” and now I can’t stop thinking of an svsss ouran high au where Luo Binghe put together a host club made of Yue Qingyuan, Liu Qingge, Mobei-Jun, Shang Qinghua, Tianlang-jun, Zhuzhi-lang, and honor student, Shen Yuan (who’s older brother, Shen Jiu, might murder the lot of them), who stumbled into music room 3 one day and is now their errand boy that Luo Binghe is obsessed with.

[hua-liansimp]

I need someone to animate moshang to the trending part of Elevator Man by Oingo Boingo. I need to see Shang Qinghua patting his knees as he asks Mobei Jun to "let me be his daddy" drunk out of his mind, while Mobei Jun can't decide to go insane or be insanely horny

[waitineedaname]

the most hilarious thing about the ages of the transmigrators in svsss is that bingqiu is the one with the teacher/student age difference kink but shen yuan is MAX ten years older than binghe, and moshang is the one that seems like they'd be peers but shang qinghua is at least twenty (probably closer to thirty) years older than mobei-jun

[raddestrose]

I cannot take him seriously right now, hes gotta stop referring to himself as daddy

[confuzing]

I've changed my mind, she is a moshang baby and her name is Mixue.

SQQ: ...Like the ice cream place?

SQH: I can name my kids whatever I want.

I feel like Mobei Jun has big Girl Dad energy.

Like I think he'd be good with kids in general if only on account of not wanting to be like his dad. (Maybe a little cautious while he worked out how sturdy they are.)

But specifically I think he'd be good at little girl make believe games.

Little Girl: I'm the queen and you're my bodyguard.

Mobei Jun: *nods*

Little Girl: And we found out someone at this tea party is trying to poison me. *gestures at stuffed animals sitting around the table with them* And we have to figure out who before they succeed.

Mobei Jun: And then publicly execute them to serve as a warning to others who might challenge your rule.

Little Girl: YES

[ineffectualdemon]

I don't feel like Mobei is actually a trophy husband but I feel like he would like to play at it for funsie

Like giving Shang Qinghua his credit card so Shang Qinghua can take him on an indulgent shopping trip

Only he's buying incredibly practical and sensible (expensive) things so no one takes this as a trophy hubby spending spree. But it is one in his head so he's happy. Even though he's the one paying for it

I think Mobei likes the romance and pageantry of being a gorgeous bit of arm candy for his hot husband who provides for him but is too practical and too much of a control freak to live it out which is fine because he interprets his life that way anyway.

What Shang Qinghua Actually Says: I have finalised the report and rearranged all your other meetings so you can attend the dinner function with Luo Binghe and finally take out that rival you've been hunting

What Mobei Jun Hears: Don't worry your pretty little head about all those icky details. Daddy has everything under control. You just need to go party and let off some steam

What Mobei Says in his head: Oh Daddy! You let me have all the fun! It's so nice to know I can rely on Daddy! *Giggle*

What he actually says to Shang Qinghua: Understood. The function is at 7, double check the guest list and make sure our info is up to date.

Tbc Shang Qinghua would be at least mildly horrified if he knew but that would require Mobei Jun to be forth coming with his deep inner thoughts which will never ever happen

[sunderwight]

Luo Binghe needs to make better friends with Shang Qinghua, because Shang Qinghua's the one person who would know how to get Shen Qingqiu to top Binghe in bed.

Like if Binghe ever got to the friendliness level of actually bemoaning the situation, Shang Qinghua would be like, oh yah no problem leave it to daddy I got this for you. And then he'd go visit Shen Qingqiu and be all, so how's the sex life going?

After Shen Qingqiu finished yelling at him for asking the question, he'd of course provide some details -- which Shang Qinghua would translate out of Cucumber-ese into Normal Person Speak for concepts like "I'm a huge size queen so I'm really enjoying that WMD you gave your protagonist" and "I haven't figured it out yet but I really need to start using a better quality of lube" and etc, until there was an opening for him to get in the question of, has Shen Qingqiu topped Luo Binghe yet? Has he plumbed the depths of his heavenly love cave?

Which would probably inspire a two minute rant about the euphemism before Shen Qingqiu is finally like, of course I haven't topped, are you insane, I would never besmirch the dignity of an alpha male like that!

Shang Qinghua nods and hums thoughtfully and delivers the critical strike:

"Yeah, I guess he isn't really pretty enough to bottom."

Shen Qingqiu's expression goes through several different flavors of emotion before settling on "outrage". What the fuck, Airplane? Not pretty enough? Who gave him that face? What is that face if not "pretty"? Maybe some more advanced versions of the same concept, but that's the only case you could make, the case that it's actually "beautiful" or "gorgeous" or something because "pretty" is just too inadequate to describe it! You'd dare imply Binghe is ugly?! Is it crack that you're smoking?

Shang Qinghua just shrugs and goes well no the face department is probably not bad for that kind of thing, it's really more the body that's unsuitable. All those muscles and all, who wants to see those kinds of curves underneath them? And that ass. Totally inadequate for the job. He doesn't really blame Cucumber-bro for finding the whole prospect too unpleasant to contemplate! (Says man who regularly tops Mobei Jun, but it's not like Shen Qingqiu has figured that out, man's firmly stuck on yaoi tropes that say Airplane always bottoms because he's shorter.)

This, of course, inspires a fifteen minute rant on why Luo Binghe's ass is the most attractive ass ever, and all Shang Qinghua has to do is imply that if that were actually true, Shen Qingqiu would have had his husband bent over a bench at least once by now. And he's done it. This conversation can now only end with Shen Qingqiu storming off in a fit of righteous fury to go grab his husband and prove his point by bridal-carrying him into the bedroom and not coming back out until he's won the argument by ravishing Luo Binghe beyond a doubt.

Shen Qingqiu would be halfway through smugly informing Shang Qinghua that Binghe was the best lay ever the next day before it would even occur to him that he'd been had.

But Luo Binghe's too bad at making friends to ever unlock this feature, I think.

[disgracefulthings]

SVSSS Accidental Baby Acquisition AU, but the baby is Shang Qinghua. He's still an adult, but all the peak lords/demon lords find him adorable and keep trying to adopt him

Shang Qinghua, who has never had a good family, still thinks everyone dislikes him and is making fun of him by calling him a baby

[penbuddies64]

Contining on this post i really like the idea that sqh's parents also come to the moutain bi-yearly for the hoildays (sqh comes to their house for the other years) and almost every an ding disciple knows them either it it bc sqh's mom makes and gives out the best desserts (they're free also!) Or sqh's dad (if you literally just bump into him) just teaching you random stuff from how to make maple syrup or how to safely fall from enormous hights (sqh's dad learned how to make maple syrup for sqh's mom bc she wanted to try a new recipe but she didnt have the maple syrup to make it) and when after you meet them they leave you with just so much good healthy parental vibes that they could heal your mommy or daddy issues for a day

Then sqq meets them and is like 'how did you end up like this then?? To sqh and sqh is like 'i said they were good parents, not that i was a good person' and luo binghes in the backround worndering if his adoptive mother had a younger sister bc sqh's mom oddly similar to her and they have somewhat similar personalities (honestly i just like making sqh related to lbg in some way), or theres this time when new years comes every other two years where sqh cannot be disturbed and even if you try to follow him you'll just end up knocked out on the floor (sqh keeps his location of his parents very secure so that they arnt used against him (it happened once when a demon in mbj court tried to make him leave or they'll hurt his family (that demon has been kicked out and killed and that was one of the only times that mbj has his human so filled with rage (it was also really hot)))) anyways sqh also put a fuck ton of protecting and warding talismans to the point where his parents were like

'are you sure we need this much a-hua?'

And he was like 'ma you could never be so sure'

and they were like 'hm okay...'

and then there was this one time when sqq tried to find sqh on the third year since they met to celebrate for new years and he spent like days trying to find him himself and on the 4th day he asked the disciple he saw the most with sqh where tf he is and the disciple was like

Disciple: 'oh you cant find shizun at this time'

Sqq: 'oh really? Why?'

Disciple: 'he just goes somewhere at this time for the new years, no one knows where its just that you literally cant find him and every time somebody tried to they just ended up knocked out at the nearest inn'

Sqq: '... huh'

(Sqq thinks hes going to mbj place)

And only then would he find out in post cannon that the 2 random ppl that he only saw on new years talking with sqh was sqh's parents by him seeing the middle aged man ruffle sqh's hair in a playful manner and the middle aged woman pinch his cheeks and chastising him for not eating enough and asking a nearby disciple who were they for them to be doing that and the disciple answering

Disciple: 'oh those are shizuns parents, they're really nice'

Sqq: '???'

And then later sqq pulled sqh by the robes and said

'YOU DIDNT TELL ME YOU HAD PARENTS???'

And sqh says

'Well i didnt really have the chance to???'

You could the insults from another peak

Tbh ive thought of somthing that i thought would be very funny, what if sqh had like a good relationship with his (transmigrated) parents, like they sent him letters regularly and he replies and he visits them yearly for the holidays or smth cause like ive realized that other than sqq no one in the main cast like has any friendly relationships and im pretty sure that no one in the main cast has any non toxic familal relationships (tlj doesn't count he like the dead beatest of all dead beats) anyway as i was saying i think it would be good for fun factor if sqh had just like a normal family like bc i could just imagine him like transmigrating as a baby and like being kinda bewildered that like his parents were like really good compared to his last ones and even if he was like a 25-30 year old in a toddlers body he still has a toddler brain and the inner desire to be loved by his parents and also being shocked that he didnt have the classic sad backstory like most of the other villians he wrote, so like for the first few years that he regained his memories he always thought that his parents would switch up or smth but after like a few months he began to trust them, and like i could like imagine sqq an offhanded comment saying somthing to sqh ab having no parents or loving parents and sqh being like

"Um actually i do have parents and they love me alot!"

And sqq saying

"Wait what?"

And then sqh showing him like a letter that his parents sended him and then sqq being like

"Wait so you actually have nice and loving parents?"

And sqh being like

"Yep"

Or like sqh having mbj meeting the parents and mbj actually being very nervous for it like hes getting stressed ab what to wear or smth and sqh trying to calm him down

Like i just really like this idea

[nibbelraz]

Imagining the airplane extras in the Shang Twins au is so funny because imagine you think finally your brother is standing up to this demon thats been running you to ground and all he does is pinch his cheeks and say the most wild incoherent shit known to man before leaving

[gaywarcriminals]

Rating Scum Villian characters based on how milfy they are:

Shen (Yuan) Qingqiu: an easy 10/10. You can’t tell your disciplesonwife that you wouldn’t abort him without becoming a milf.

Luo Binghe: and on the opposite end of the spectrum, 0/10! He’s just a little baby. He is 1,000 years younger than shizun and he likes it that way! He’s a wife, but an 18 y/o, husband’s-third-remarriage wife— he’s the same age as his husbands kids from the first wife. no milf vibes to be seen.

Liu Qingge: 1/10. Deep down he might have some parental traits, but as-is he is somewhere between weird (autistic) uncle and half-feral farm cat.

Liu Mingyan: 5/10. She’s still in her larva state of milfdom but someday she will be an excellent Mommy.

Ning Yingying: 3/10. Right now she’s baby and she likes it that way, but she has the bite of authority to her, and maybe in the far flung further she’ll spec into the Dommy Mommy skill tree.

Sha Hualing: 0/10. She’s baby, she’s a brat, she’s going to bite you and have a temper tantrum.

Shang Qinghua: 2/10. I have to give him a few points for being Binghe’s daddy, but we all know he’s a deadbeat dad who ran off with his new wife and left his kids alone with their step mom. The closest he gets to being nurturing is homoerotically saving his sexy OC, which is a Whole Different Thing.

Mobei-Jun: 5/10 for them tiddies.

Yue Qingyuan: 10/10. No I will not be explaining.

Shen Jiu: 9/10 because he’s abusive as only a mother can be 💖

Luo Bingge: -10/10. This man canonically has a fuck ton of kids and I don’t believe he knows any of their names. He is simply too Babygirl to parent 😔. SY come pick him up.

Qi Qingqi: 8/10 step on me mommy

Mu Qingfan: 6/10 I believe he can to unspeakable things to you while shushing you with a gentle smile

Tianlang-Jun: 7/10 for breedability, tits, and nephew raising, small point deduction for fumbling his actual son.

Su Xiyan: 0/10. She’s a Daddy, there’s a difference.

Zhuzhi-lang: -3/10 he is so tiny so small he is just a little guy just a snek

Madam Meiyin: 9/10 I fully believe all those succubi are her daughter-wives who she raises and teaches to hunt and comforts them when their prey gets away—

Six Balls: 6/6 six balls.

[ghostkingsupreme]

shang qinghua: call me daddy

mobei-jun (not understanding a single thing sqh says): i crave this hamster carnally

[venshichan]

This is so delicious, I want more of this, no–I NEED someone to make this! I've seen SQH turn into TLJ's sister, older bro, parent or ancestor,but never as TLJ and I have to admit, it's a good idea! Please, someone MAKE this and tag me or something!

I have seen Shen Yaun as a number of NPCs - Ming Fan, Gongyi Xiao, Zhuzhi Lang. But I haven't really seen Sheng Qinghua as anyone other than SQH in Different Situations™. So I present to you:

Airplane as Tianlang Jun

Now tumblr, you might be asking: how? why? really?

Yes. I say let Daddy Airplane be the most daddy and also the most chaotic and most powerful and most likely to just fuck off and start again under a new penname -- as soon as he gets out from under this fucking mountain!!

Imagine dying and waking up trapped under a fucking mountain with only your deathly loyal soft snake nephew for comfort and a bright ass screen in your face saying "FIX THE PLOT BUT THIS SYSTEM WONT TELL YOU HOW (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･"

Depending on when he transmigrates in and how fast it takes for him to come up with a way for good snake son to help him escape there are so many timeline possibilities.

Does he fuck off on his own until the plot sneaks back up on him?

Does he seek out Luo Binghe to give him a cinderella arc vs a whump-revenge arc?

Does best most favorite boy MOBEI JUN become AIRPLANE'S right hand?? An emperor and his pretty knight??

These are the transmigration possibilities Airplane wanted lbh. Instead he got the baby route. Rough.

[aspiringjester]

not enough people put into practice the concept that in a complete identity reveal mobei jun can flex on binghe that lbh might be the protagonist but HE'S god's (daddy's) favorite