#miscarriage mention
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I cant remember if Spock being a genetically engineered tube baby is actually canon or not but, either way, I DO see him as being a very canonically planned and thought-out baby (like Sarek and Amanda weren't good at parenting emotionally but they WERE baby-prepared. In my mind.) However. In my au where Spock is a terrifying accident baby.....
Like the concept of accidentbaby!Spock has a lot of baggage with it like ok A) outs Amanda and Sarek's xenophillic sexual relationship. LOL. B) possibility for complications during childbirth because like how does that work if your baby HAS BLOOD BASED ON A DIFFERENT ELEMENT. (could just be complications or miscarriage or death of mother depending on how dark u wanna get...) C) Spock health complications as a child and/or for his entire life. Whoopsie this hybrid is unplanned and now you have to figure out if its gonna survive infancy. And then childhood. Etc etc. I won't lie I mostly thought of this au because my "Spock has chronic pain" trutherism is soooo strong. I just think a really interesting Spock Avenue to explore is, like, hey. what if his body hated him? Its fresh it's relatable its now. Its my accepted worldview.
I saw that scene in "Operation: Annihilate" where Spock insists on working through the intense pain McCoy is registering in him because according to him its "something of the body that can be overcome by the mind," or whatever. And I was like wow Mr Spock this is just me working an 8hr shift with back pain.....
#miscarriage mention#I have literally so many Star Trek au/canon divergence ideas that I dont post here this is nothing really.#I'm super evil cus what I'll do is post a rant like this and maybe a couple doodles and then never anything else about it ever.#like what im not gonna WRITE it are you crazy... but here's a prompt.... user @allgremlinart OUT
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"objectober" this, "inktober" that, "goretober" this, "oscctober" that... but i can't do any of these. school comes first 👍
#sillyposting#osc#inanimate insanity#object shows#object show#object show community#inanimateinsanity#inanimate insanity invitational#ii#oscblr#cabby#inanimate insanity cabby#cabby ii#ii cabby#cabby inanimate insanity#roblox#roblox game#roblox screenshot#roblox meme#miscarriage mention#osc community#objectober 2024#inktober#oscctober#goretober
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My mom was the cutest kid ever. She was just adorable. Which was probably in no small part due to my grandmother who made sure to dress her in the cutest outfits the 70s had to offer, bought her the coolest toys and put her hair up in pigtails. But she was a cute kid all on her own. My dad, however, there aren’t many photos of him as a child and he looks evil in all of them, he’s grinning at the camera like he’s planning something diabolical. Unlike the pictures of my mom which were taken fairly candidly on a home camera and have that warm film 70s glow, little windows into a comfortable middle class home with a happy little girl, the few photos of my dad were all taken at the Macy’s photo studio and they lack charm.
My mother’s mother didn’t always protect her from the evil in the world but she loves her and she was so happy to have a child after years of marriage and a previous miscarriage. My father came into this world under very different circumstances. He was conceived at a party and his parents had a shotgun wedding when grandma was about 3 months pregnant. I know my dad’s mom loves me but I’m not sure she loves him as much as a parent should. It shows in the photos. It shows in the careful way my mom’s mom packed away baby mementos and little outfits belonging to my mom but my dad doesn’t have many toys from his childhood and all of the photos of him are so impersonal.
#miscarriage mention#it’s such a stark difference when looking through photos#but my mom’s mom is also a photography enthusiast she just took pictures of everything#car wrecks. dogs. funerals. her kids. her house.
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my official stance is a pregnancy is whatever the pregnant person wants it to be. if it’s a 4 weeks old clump of cells and they wants to call it a baby it’s a baby. if they're 20 weeks and they want to call it a parasite it’s a parasite. if they're 39 weeks and call it a fetus it’s a fetus. “why are you so sad about miscarrying at 6 weeks it was literally just an embryo” because that was their baby. “how can you get an abortion at three months” because that wasn’t a baby. hope that helps.
#Post was good. op was a terf so I stole it#Pregnancy mention#Abortion mention#Miscarriage mention#pro choice
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scam’s pregnancy announcement
#dndads#scam likely#scam actually#jodie foster#scamster#and some others#miscarriage mention#video#ignore how choppy this is IDC ANYMORE#animatic
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I don’t know when pregnancy loss stops hurting.
It didn’t at their due date, or the one year mark of having their presence in my life. It didn’t at the first “birth” day, or second, or fifth.
It didn’t when I got pregnant with their sibling. It didn’t when I lost them, too.
It hasn’t on those random Tuesdays, when I’m hit with the sudden grief that I never heard them cry.
It hasn’t every Mother’s Day, every Christmas wondering how different it would’ve been than the last, when the school year starts and I realize they’d be off to Kindergarten.
When I pass the children’s activity center in the museum, and I wonder if they’d be eager to go in or shy because of the other kids.
I know it shouldn’t stop hurting. I tell my friends, your baby matters, I support other loss parents by reminding them your baby existed. I convince myself that mine do not. I close my eyes to see the images of the positive pregnancy tests and pretend that they never existed.
Coping, avoidance is (negatively) coping.
Someone, who was barely a something, can’t hurt this much. Maybe they never got to be my baby, but they were my dream. My future, love personified. Never anything tangible to attach it to, a vision of someday.
Someday left too soon, too soon to be tangible. Too soon to grieve. Too soon to understand. I was still processing that they existed, when they did not anymore.
I don’t know when pregnancy loss quits hurting.
I hope it never does, because it is the only reminder that I ever had them at all.
#infertility#early pregnancy loss#pregnancy loss#miscarriage mention#miscarriage#missing the love i never knew
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"I didn't marry you for your cooking."
This fucking line.
Wouldn't it be hilarious if she was already pregnant when they got married?
(Yes, with Hiccup. Though I'm firmly of the opinion that Hiccup was not the only pregnancy they had. Just the only one to make it out of infancy.)
#ashleybenlove posts#how to train your dragon#httyd2#miscarriage mention#infant death tw#It just feels SO LIKELY
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Bloodborne: Menstruation and Ministration
Just some thoughts I had about the parallels of Bloodborne's Healing Church and real-world Catholic/Levantine teachings.
In Bloodborne, every Great One loses their child. The association of childbirth, miscarriage, and menstruation with blood in the real world is also made in the game. (The Blood Moon heralds miracle pregnancies, the "Mensis" ritual, e.g.) But also consider how the discovery of the Old Blood led to the foundation of the Healing Church and blood ministration, which is meant to heal and transcend the people but instead causes a scourge and rampant chaos.
I think it's interesting that it is a healing church, and delivers blood by ministration, and not administration. Hospitals administer medicine, but churches have ministers. Blood transfusions in Bloodborne are framed as a religious act in this way. In the real world, a well-known religious ministration of blood is the rite of the Eucharist, wherein taking in the transubstantiated blood of Christ is a representation of His covenant to absolve humanity's sin.
Ok, so there's some parallels between blood ministration and the Eucharist. Let's now think about childbirth. In the story of the Fall of mankind, woman's curse for Eve's part in the Fall is the pain and difficulty of menstruation and childbirth, both of which involve losing blood. Woman's blood loss is a curse, while the Lord's blood offers absolution from the original sin that precipitated that curse.
It's not known why Great Ones always lose their child. But this is something that happens regardless of the existence of the Healing Church or the beast scourge. It is not a punishment for sin. In Bloodborne, the Catholic story is reversed: humans bear a curse for the act of blood ministration, while gods themselves bleed for their children.
(Notes: This is simply my interpretation of what I have experienced of Bloodborne and not a commentary on intended themes of the writers. Also, apologies if I used any religious terms or ideas incorrectly. I was raised in the catholic church but am no longer practicing, nor am I a religious scholar. This post is simply, Hey based on my lived experience, here's what Bloodborne makes me think of.)
#text#bloodborne#literary analysis?#fromsoft#miscarriage mention#blood mention#sorry this is so out of the norm for my blog#but i love fromsoft and i love close reading
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What was their first night as new parents like? () and what new traditions do they start as a family? (CherriSnake)
OOOH! (Just a warning for the mention of miscarriage 🩷)
So, their first nights as parents was filled with an abundance of complex emotions. For Pen, he had been a father back when he was alive and he was very much hands on - odd for a Victorian Gentleman but he hadn't never been ordinary. Since Bash was born during a fight with some rogue demons, Pen obviously was extremely protective. Not just of his newborn son but his wife. One thing he had regretted when he was alive was not being a good husband, he fully intended on changing that with Cherri. He carried Cherri and Bash back to the airship - since they were still enjoying their adventures in Hell - and barely left their side. He had been excited since they found out about Bash, he knew they were in for a wonderful new adventure together.
Cherri on the other hand, although she was delighted to finally hold her baby boy, couldn't help but be nervous and anxious the whole first night. She was annoyed at that since she built up a tough girl persona. She had quite a few miscarriages in life, and death too, so she was very protective of Bash since he was the first baby she hadn't lost. She didn't want to let him go but she trusted Pen and was finally able to go to sleep.
They both appreciated that no one knew about Bash until they returned home so they could enjoy their newfound parenthood together.
One tradition they began after Bash was born that every year on his birthday they would go and have a turf war with Overlords they weren't allied with or demons they found irritating. Bash soon became as explosive and inventive as his mama and papa.
(This was a super fun ask! Please send more!)
#here lie the sinners#life could be a musical sweetheart#cherrisnake#snakebomb#asks#ask box#ask me anything#cherri bomb#sir pentious#bash oc#sebastian pentious bomb#cherrisnake fam#cherrisnake fankid#fpreg#tw miscarriage#miscarriage mention#miscarriage
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Not an anti thing, but I feel like this blog will appreciate this.
I have always been a pop girl, but there is a not-insignificant part of me that enjoys the entire spectrum of rock music. One of my favorite concerts I ever went to was a dual header of Blondie and Garbage.
Garbage (the band) is the subject of this, because I come to them from maybe the strangest interaction I ever had regarding music. I and a few other kids from my church were on our way to the local Christian summer camp, to clean up the grounds before summer. The male parent driving the car has let us listen to some radio music, of which the 2000s version of "Lady Marmalade" and Uncle Kracker's "Follow Me" were played nearly back-to-back. The parent was not wrong when he pointed out that those songs are about prostitution and adultery, respectively. What boggles me is that he though Garbage was...Idk? more wholesome music? as that's what he switched over to after voicing those exact criticisms, which was the first time I ever listened to the band. I only found out later when I went back to listen to them when I was a bit older what their whole deal really was.
Go back and listen to them. Listen to "Only Happy When It Rains" and hear the line "I'm riding high upon a deep depression" and tell me that doesn't glorify some unhealthy mentalities. Listen to "When I Grow Up" and the bit where she talks about getting pregnant and drinking to drive a miscarriage and tell me that's any better than "Follow Me". Don't get me wrong, I love the band, but I sometimes wonder if this guy only listened to their Bond song ("The World is Not Enough") before picking them up.
Suppose their whole discography could be put on the problematic playlist, if one is so inclined.
Side note: ruined "Follow Me" for an ex-bf when I told him it was about adultery, bc he had never listened to the lyrics of the verses before and missed the whole "I'm not worried about the ring you wear" bit. Not my fault he didn't pay attention to the song; it was always about that.
.
#mod erin#ask#mod shenanigans#posted without comment#miscarriage mention#pregnancy mention#problematic playlist#alcohol mention
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why does every post about some serious topic like disability or something inevitably have people in the notes going Wow cool writing reference! #save for later. Its so tone deaf sometimes and inevitably leads to things like. This
#I'll be honest i dont remember exactly what the post was about#But it was about real history and oppression. Like an informative post not a writing post.#Anyone remember when i posted a screencap of a post where the op was talking about their REAL traumatizing miscarriage#And someone in the comments was going like. ''This is good angst fuel for my pregnancy fanfic!''#Now THAT is the most ghoulish example ive ever seen.#Pregnancy mention#miscarriage mention
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Mother’s Day hasn’t actually been that difficult emotionally so far. I thought it would be because of having an abusive mom and because of my miscarriage in 2019, but really, it mostly feels like just another Sunday.
#also i spent time with my baby boy!#personal#abuse mention#miscarriage mention#my life comes with so many warning labels
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The Pines Files
Chapter 4: The Haunting of Katherine Stavros
An ex-SCP comes back to the foundation, and Mabel and Dipper learn that the files are even less trustworthy than they thought
Hey quick note, this is where the references to and mentions of child abuse start, it's not explicit, but as I say in the AO3 tags, it's there. There is also a singular mention of miscarriage though no one actually has one. I will also be trigger tagging here on tumblr. Please take care of yourself.
The sun was high and bright in Alaska, the several-hour twilight breaking into proper day. The weather was comfortably in the 70's and there wasn't a cloud in the sky. This really had been an excellent decision, Katherine thought. There was plenty of work to do here, out in this place, but it was good work. No one was out here to tut over her quarterly performance, no one was here to beg to keep their job after some bullshit merger, and there was no one to tell her they were above the rules. There was just the wilderness, her animals, her daughter, and Steve the farmhand. As she finished the last drops of coffee, she went back inside. She saw Steve groggily coming downstairs, the tall blond rubbing his eyes as she told him, "You came in late again, Steve."
"Woah, sorry Mrs. S. I swear I'm not hungover or anything."
"I know, just try to not be so loud. Lacy needs her sleep and I don't want the door slamming late at night."
"You got it." He went to pour himself some coffee as Katherine went up the stairs, knocking on the door and asking, "Lacy, honey, you up?" When there was no answer, Katherine checked the knob, it was unlocked. She couldn't help but smile at that. Lacy finally felt safe in this house. It also told her that all that work she put into looking into Steve paid off. He was a good kid, a little distracted, but respectful. Either way, she headed into Lacy's room. Being careful to not startle the little girl, she turned on the light before approaching the bed. "Come on, sleepy head, it's morning."
Lacy groaned and turned over in her bed before sitting up, holding her fluffy pink blanket close. She wrapped it around herself, not complaining about being woken up, "Ok."
"You sleep good, honey?"
Lacy shook her head, wrapping her blanket tighter around herself, "Uh-uh."
"Oh no, baby, what happened?"
"I had a nightmare, there was a scary man there and he said weird things."
"Was the scary man your father?"
She shook her head.
"Was it Steve?"
She shook her head again.
Katherine sighed, stroking the girl's straight, blonde hair, a stark contrast to her own curly, black hair. Lacy's pale skin was a contrast too, though not as stark, against her olive skin. "Well, either way, your dad can't hurt you anymore, he has no idea where you are. And if Steve says or does something that makes you uncomfortable or unsafe, you come straight to me and I'll deal with him, you got that?"
"Yes, Kathy."
Oh, oh no, back to Kathy. She must have been utterly rattled. She helped her out of bed and told her, "Well, you just get dressed and washed up and I'll show you the calves and we'll feed the chickens and we'll get some ice cream after the tractor supply store and dinner."
"Does that mean I don't have to do summer reading?"
"Don't push it, Lacy."
"The other homeschool kids don't do summer reading."
"The other homeschool kids didn't miss as much as you have," well, more like they hadn't fallen off track like she had. Either way, she told her, "I'm making biscuits, so hop to it."
Lacy finally let her blanket fall and nodded, locking the door once Katherine was out. Once downstairs, Katherine set to making biscuits and asked Steve, "Could you watch the house while I'm gone today? I need to go to the tractor store and I'll also be getting Lacy some dinner."
"You got it," he said, taking the sausage from the fridge to help out. "Mrs. S, did I scare Lacy?"
"Were you eavesdropping, Steve?"
"No, no, you just took a while to get back is all." He started to fry up the sausage, not looking at her.
"Well, no. What you need to understand is that Lacy has been through a lot and what sets her off won't always be predictable. She had a regular bad dream is all. If it was something you did, she'd tell me."
"'S good to know."
"Oh, and Steve?"
"Yeah?"
"Please stop calling me Mrs, we've been over this."
"Sorry Mr-" Steve stopped himself, "Sorry Ms. Stavros." He made sure to put emphasis on the Z sound.
"Thank you."
After breakfast, it was time to get to work. Lacy fed the chickens while Steve collected eggs and Katherine made a count of all their supplies. A quick affair if ever there was any, but necessary. When the list was done, the real work started; getting the cows out.
Katherine Stavros was not a dairy baroness by any means. her herd was a grand total of 20 heads of cattle, 10 cows, and just as many calves. They used to have a bull, but he had to be sold off once the job was done, so to speak. Either way, when the barn was opened, the cows and their calves came running out, frolicking in the sun. Steve couldn't help but laugh as he asked, "Have a good night, ladies?"
He was met with contented moos, as if the ladies were answering him, the calves stopping to sniff him as they often did before he went into the barn to check the feed and milk stalls. Katherine made sure the girls were all accounted for in the fields, the calves well fed. As she did, she called out, "Make sure to set some milk aside for us, Steve!"
"Got it, Ms. S!"
And Lacy sat in the truck bed, reading as she watched the cattle go about their business, eating the grass and sunbathing while the calves nursed. She spoke up and asked, "Mom, why can't I pet the calves? They're so cute."
"Because you're small, baby. If one of the cows decides she doesn't want you near, there won't be anything you can do to stop her from trampling you. I'll let you start helping when you're older." She then called to the barn, "Steve! Brady needs his antibiotic shot! Get a lasso!"
"But I won't hurt them."
"They don't know that, honey. For all they know, you might be planning to eat a calf you come up to, and they're good moms, they'll do anything in their power to prevent that."
It was then that Steve arrived with the lasso, swinging it above his head before catching the red calf in question while Katherine got the injection ready. His mother lowed in anger the entire time.
Much of the day passed by doing chores. When those were done, Katherine kept track of the books while Lacy read and Steve knit. As the day became lighter, Katherine and Lacy got ready to head out, Steve still at it with his knitting. As they headed out the door, Katherine asked him, "Do you want anything from Tomato Yard?"
"Just some chicken alfredo."
"You got it."
The trip to the tractor supply wasn't anything special. Just some seaweed feed, and some medical supplies. Once it was loaded up in the truck though, Lacy said, "There's something I didn't tell you about the dream."
Oh no. Katherine stayed parked in the truck, asking Lacy, "What happened, honey?"
"The guy in my dream said weird things. Things that didn't sound like words, but he also called me a weird name, A'tivik. What does that mean?"
Well, Katherine wasn't sure what she was expecting, but it wasn't that. She turned the key in the ignition and said, "Well, I don't know, baby. It sounds familiar but I don't know from where or what it means."
"Is it bad?"
Katherine felt uneasy about the name but told Katherine, "I don't think it is. Tell you what, why don't we look it up when we get home? It might just be your brain doing weird things."
"Ok."
But as Katherine drove, she continued to feel uneasy. Why was that bothering her? It didn't sound like anything real. It sounded like something out of an H.P. Lovecraft novel or something. And sure, Lacy was too young to be reading that, but it shouldn't be inciting that kind of nervousness in Katherine.
However, the thoughts faded as they got to the restaurant, sat down, and ordered spaghetti for Lacy, tortellini for Katherine, and Steve's chicken alfredo to go. Her thoughts drift to the more mundane, Lacy's curriculum, financials on the farm, and Steve. He had been hired seasonally, but he had done well, despite his slightly ditzyness. She could probably extend his contract, as discussed, and keep him as a farmhand in the off-season. It would certainly be helpful when Lacy went to in-person schooling. But there was one person's opinion she needed. "Lacy, honey, what do you think of Steve?"
"He's nice, he showed me how he knits and he lets me read his comic books."
"Oh, which ones?"
"Spider-Man. He keeps some from me, though, some red guy. I want to read them but he says they're too violent."
Katherine thought for a moment, there were a lot of violent, red, comic book characters, "What does he look like?"
"Kind of like Spider-Man, but he's got swords."
"Oh, Deadpool. He's right to do that."
But then Lacy blurted out, "Is Steve in trouble?"
Katherine raised an eyebrow in surprise, "Why would he be in trouble."
"Because we read them when we're supposed to be keeping an eye on the hoof guy, and when we need to keep an eye on the cows when the vet is checking them. I'm sorry."
"Oh, Lacy, no, don't worry, that's fine. I know Steve is just multitasking. Granted, I wish he was a little more subtle about it, but I knew."
"Oh."
"Mmmhmm, now, eat your breadsticks, the doctor says you're still underweight."
Lacy gladly grabbed another breadstick.
Though, now that Katherine thought about it, poor Lacy must have been lonely, if Steve was her one source of comic books and mischief. She needed to see about getting her into mainstream school faster.
They, as promised, stopped for ice cream on the way home. Things were fully calm. There was no need to fear Steve's job security or weird dreams. Katherine felt perfectly fine. That was until they pulled up to the house and the door was open. Normally, she wouldn't think much of it. Attribute it to Steve being Steve and grumble about the electric bill. But something felt different. A feeling in her gut that something was very wrong. Call it a trauma response, call it mother's intuition, she pulled a hunting knife out of the glove compartment and told Lacy, "Wait in the car, honey."
"What's going on?"
"Just stay, Lacy." She got out of the truck, not sure what to expect. Her house ransacked? Her sparse jewelry gone? Lacy's one safe space made unsafe yet again? A bunch of wild animals running amock? As she stepped through the door, she immediately gasped, dropping her knife.
On the floor of her living room, in the middle of the Alaskan countryside, was the body of one Steve Ivanov, naked, and lying in a puddle of his own blood. He had been placed in the fetal position by whoever had done this. Though he had his legs closed, she could tell he had been mutilated from the amount of blood on his thighs. She did not check just how badly, wanting the man to have a modicum of dignity in death. Instead, she looked at what else was done to him. She counted seven stab wounds, his throat had been slit. But then, she saw that the cuts on his chest looked like writing. Shaking, she got down on her knees and gently pushed him onto his back. He went slack, so fresh that rigor mortis hadn't even set in. The writing on his chest read, "Come home, A'habbat."
Flashes of images came to her mind then, making no sense and complete sense. Impossibilities and things she knew to be fact. And she screamed, gripping her head and pulling her hair. For she remembered ALL. Every horrid dream of that horrid figure, the feeling of his hands on her even after she woke up, the agonies and tortures that came after, the false saviors, being just a number for a full year, the electrical shocks, the doctors in white coats, the "treatment administrators" in orange jumpsuits, every single FUCKING pill they gave her so the terror would be fresh, the one time she woke up not to terror anew but to a doctor with a necklace (no, amulet, she knew the difference now) telling her that everything would be ok, lying that it was her first day there and they would keep her safe until they figured out how to help her. It was a hundred lifetimes of horror upon her. And not even just earthly horrors. She was A'habbat. She remebered that. She remembered a time before time when existence was agony. She remembered. And that was the worst torture of all.
When her screaming finally ended, she panted, her throat feeling raw. She had expected the Johnsons, who lived a full mile away, to come running to see what the racket was about. Instead of a kindly older couple though, a scared little voice came from outside, "Kathy? What happened?"
"Go back to the car, Lacy!"
"But-"
"Do as I say! Do not come in here!"
Lacy squeaked and got back to the pickup. Katherine would probably regret yelling at her later but she couldn't deal with her parenting mistakes right now, instead, she went to the linen closet and wrapped Steve in a bedsheet. She then rolled him all the way out to the backyard, into the compost pit, and covered it with as much dirt as she could. It was better than leaving him naked in an abandoned house at least.
She then went into Lacy's room and grabbed her go-bag. She checked that it had the essentials and grabbed Katie's blanket and teddy bear for good measure, putting the whole thing in the girl's hamper. She then went to her room and grabbed her own go-bag and hamper before stomping on the loose floorboard at the foot of her bed, pulling out the cash box and shotgun that were there, and putting those in her hamper too. She headed to the truck and dumped it all into the bed, pushing the feed and medical supplies out, taking the shotgun with her as she got into the driver's seat, first making sure the house was locked. Lacy was curled up in the front passenger seat, hiding her face in her knees. She lifted her head a little and asked, "Am I in trouble, Kathy?"
"No, Lacy, you didn't do anything. Just buckle up and stay calm, ok?"
"Does it have to do with me? Do we have to talk to the witness protection lady?"
"No, no, it has nothing to do with you. It has to do with me."
"Huh?"
Katherine ignored the question, just backing the car up and turning before pulling her cell phone out of her pocket and making a call.
"Hello? Katherine?"
"Hi, Mrs. Johnson, I'm sorry to call you last minute but I had a family emergency and needed to head South. Can you do me a huge favor and turn off the generator for the main house and bring some supplies into the shed? And make sure all the animals are fed too. Just send me the invoice for their feed if we run out on my property."
"Of course, Katherine. How long do you expect to be gone for? And what about Steve?"
She choked up for a single second, "Steve isn't working for me anymore. As for how long I'll be gone, I have no idea. If I'm not back in a month, there's a key under the welcome mat and the cows' papers are in a cabinet file in my office for you to sell off the animals. Make sure they go somewhere nice."
"Goodness, Katherine. What happened?"
"My father had something come up, something serious. Just promise me."
"I promise."
With that, Katherine hung up and passed the phone to Lacy. "Take the sim card out of this, it's in the little flap on the left, throw it outside, and turn the phone off."
Lacy nodded, starting to do that before quietly asking, "Where are we going, Kathy?"
"Someplace that will keep us safe," or at least, she hoped they would.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It had been a week since the project officially started. The turnaround time on the approval for this outing, and the creation of the Delta-Iota-Nu mobile task force, had been incredible, as they were already heading into the mines. Mason felt excited about the whole situation, nostalgic even. He also felt a certain amount of pride, leading the world's nerdiest mobile task force to the old, abandoned church and down the hole. It was almost funny seeing how nervous Katie was to go down into the unknown. Bright noticed and told her, "Hey, it's alright, this rope is the least of your worries," as they climbed down.
She shot back with, "That's exactly the problem!" Which got a laugh out of Dr. Gonzalez. Either way, as soon as everyone was down, they turned on their flashlight and started walking. As they did, Dr. Chen spoke into a tape recorder, "Expedition 1 into SCP-[REDACTED] mines, June 20. The shallowest level of the mines contains living specimens from the Cretaceous period trapped in sap."
Mason went to grab a sap sample while Dr. Chen kept talking, hearing him say, "Some specimens appear to be melting, hypothesized to be a result of global climate change. Melting specimens include a large female Tyrannosaurus Rex. Note: Request that Mu-Alpha-Epsilon monitor this specimen."
Mason looked at the offended Tyrannosaurus Rex and saw that it had its whole leg out now, where once it only had a toe. The beast's limb scratched the ground, attempting to escape its sap prison. He ran back to the group when she turned her eye to look at him.
As they went further, they saw more samples out of time, plants of all things. Dr. Chen spoke into his recorder again. "Despite a lack of sunlight, several Cretaceous era ferns have sprouted along the sap. Note: Test for UV radiation."
Mason took a picture of the ferns. It hadn't really occurred to him how weird it was that there were plants growing down here. Or how much light there was. Then again, he had been frustrated with Soos and worried about Mabel at the time. Not exactly the most observant of moods.
The deeper they went into the mine, the more sparse the sap became, and the more sparse the specimens became. The one sign of life at 100 meters below sea level being the bones of the pterodactyl family that had once been down here. Mason remembered how McGucket said that he had chewed through one of the hatchlings and, indeed, one of the skeletons showed signs of rib collapse. He took a picture as Dr. Chen spoke, "Anomalies appear to cease at this depth. Whether this is due to a lack of available food for living animals or the effects of the barrier are unknown."
Dr. Bright took that as a sign to move to the next part of the expedition, "Who has the drill?"
"I do," Dr. Gonzalez said, producing an electric drill from her messenger bag. However, instead of a regular drillbit, she attached a unicorn horn before handing it to Dr. Bright.
Dr. Bright tested the drill, squeezing the trigger a couple of times to produce a vrrp vrrp noise, and asked, "Are we away from the edge of town?"
Mason answered, "We are."
"Best not waste battery power on the wall, then." He crouched and drilled into the ground, producing a hole with no resistance from the ground. Dr. Chen described this as Katie helpfully sprayed it with red paint, "Marking the evidence, Dr. Bright."
"Love the initiative, Katie."
Dr. Pines then took a picture of the marker and all the ones that came after. Every 100 meters, they would drill at the bottom of the cave floor and find that the unicorn horn, tough as it was, went through the earth easily. The process became so mundane that Mason's mind started to wander. He thought of his and Mabel's D,D&MoreD "game" a few days ago. They had worked out a rather simple method over the years, he and Mabel. They had used a Mindflayer as the session's BBEG, and it used a globe of invincibility, to stop Mabel's Tabaxi from from learning its secrets. She got the gist of it pretty quickly, though she had griped about mindflayers in general. "It's literally just an alien," she had said. "Why does this game have aliens?"
When they got to the bottom of the mine, about UFO depth, Mason had half a mind to think that there was no bottom of the barrier, with absolutely no resistance so far. That it was just a bowl and that he was wrong. That was until he heard a snap and saw what happened when Dr. Bright tried to drill. He quickly took a picture before the shimmering ripples of arcane energy dissipated. That was a floor. That was definitely a floor. Dr. Gonzalez and Katie both immediately pulled tools out of their bags and started taking measurements. There were bits of unicorn horn all over the floor and Dr. Chen frantically took audio notes. Dr. Pines also dug through his bag, testing more materials. Shrink crystal, gnome hair, multi-bear claw shed, they all caused ripples. And he laughed, "Oh, what the hell? My first thought was right."
Katie wondered though, "How do you explain the lack of anomalies?"
"There's no food down here," explained Dr. Bright. "Living anomalies would have no reason to be down here and the mine was stripped a long time ago. Any anomalous minerals are top side already. Well, except the UFO." He looked at Mason as he adjusted his glasses, "Your hypothesis was right, Dr. Pines. How's it feel to be the man of the hour?"
"It, uh, feels pretty great to know I was right, actually."
"You know it does. It's a little early in our investigation but this is progress, how about we go for drinks?"
Mason smiled even more than he was before. His coworkers were inviting him somewhere. His boss was inviting him out for drinks. "Y-yeah! That sounds like a great idea."
They had to head to headquarters first, though, to clock out and decontaminate and write up reports, but after? They would have fun.
However, upon arrival at the base, there was a buzz in the lobby, a clamoring, and some yelling. Dr. Bright brushed past, since he had some authority, and the others followed out of curiosity. There, at the desk, speaking to security, was a woman in her 30s. She was holding a little girl's hand. Her daughter, most likely, but Mason noted that they looked nothing alike. There were some MTF agents, including Mabel, with tranq at the ready. If they were here, this couldn't just be a civilian.
Mason finally heard her speak, being so close to her, "Look, you have to believe me! No, I know you believe me, because you have the peanut gallery here instead of your no-good security staff! I know the "protect" part of your name is a sick joke but-"
Dr. Bright froze up as the woman, still holding the little girl's hand, went up to him, "You! I remember you! Tell them!"
Bright backed up, tucking his amulet into his shirt, "Ma'am, I assure you, I don't know what you're talking about."
"Oh yes, you do. I know you people took those mind wipe pills or whatever you call them, but I know you're a smart man, too, Dr. Bright! You were there for a year. Where do you think that time went?"
Dr. Clef, one of the doctors standing around, looked to Bright, "What is she talking about, Jack?"
"I don't know!"
"Yes, you do!"
The little girl tugged at her mother's sleeve and said, "Mom, I'm tired."
Mabel lowered her tranq gun and lifted her vizor, looking at the girl with sympathy. She then asked the mother, "Hey, Ms., is it ok if I get your kid a soda?"
Looking between her daughter and Mabel, the woman said, "Fine, but you better stay in my sight."
Mabel nodded and told the little girl, "Come on, a soda will perk you right up. How about a Cherry Pitt Cola?"
"Is it good?"
"Sister, it's so good that I make energy drinks out of it."
With the little girl away from the people pointing guns, the mother took a breath and started from the beginning, "My name is Katherine Stavros. You were there when I was SCP-231-7. I woke up again from those pills and you were there. You lied and said it was my first day there. And you were there the day I left. You made sure to lie to my parents too. That I was at an in-patient care facility for years. That I miscarried. You have to believe me."
Dr. Bright asked her, "When were you in our facility?"
"I was there for three years, from 2010 to 2012. I was a captive of The Children of The Scarlet King throughout 2009."
"Shit," Dr. Bright took off his glasses and rubbed his face as he thought very hard. It wasn't unusual for him to forget small stretches of time, being immortal and over 100 but, "I don't remember anything from 2011 to 2012. The last thing I remember before that was some sort of assignment change for something in the cult division and that's it." Definitely a possibility then.
There were whispers then. This was all way too suspicious and accurate to be a coincidence. Or at least, it was highly unlikely.
Clef went up to her and Katherine recoiled from him, a regular reaction even if she hadn't been through what she claimed. "Look, if you are who you say you are, and I'm not saying you are, you still can't stay here. You may have been through something anomalous, but you're not anomalous yourself. Not unless you had something happen to you again."
"I found a man dead in my home and a name carved in his chest made every memory of my torture and captivity come back. Don't go telling me that's nothing."
"I'm not saying it's nothing, what I'm saying is that unless you have evidence it was The Children and that you need our protection, then there isn't much I can do. And even then, we need to confirm your intentions with the ethics board."
"Ethics board?" Added Mason as he looked to Dr. Bright.
"Not many people know this, but SCP-231 is almost entirely under the purview of the ethics board. It's not classified, it's just not usually relevant."
Mason nodded as Ms. Stavros looked defeated, "So I'm just supposed to stay in a motel and hope they haven't caught up with me? So I'm just supposed to hope they don't take an eight-year-old and put her through everything they put me through? They called me by my past life's name, Doctor."
Mabel spoke up, "Well, what if they stayed with me?"
Both Bright and Clef looked at her in surprise. Neither of them knew her like Dipper did. Even after all these years, Mabel was still thinking of others. However, Dr. Cef said, "I appreciate your initiative, Agent Pines, but then we're back at the same problem. We can't approve protection right this second."
"I'm not offering as an agent, I'm offering as a concerned citizen. I'm seeing a poor lady in a new place with nowhere to stay and a little kid and I just want to help out. I just happen to have a lot of guns too."
"She's got a point Clef, she's not owned by the foundation, she can do things in her own house."
Both Mabel and Dipper cringed at the phrasing, but Ms. Stavros didn't notice, "Alright, that works." She then looked to the chairs where the little girl was drinking her Cherry Pitt, "Lacy, honey, come on, we're going."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The ride to Mabel's place was utterly uneventful. They had fone in Katherine's pickup, the woman stoic as she drove. Lacy had been buckled up in the front seat, Mabel next to her and Dipper awkwardly sitting in the backseat as he accompanied them. He had promised to fill his reports from home, it was fine.
Upon arrival toMabel's house, Dipper went to help the ladies with their bags, but Katherine stopped him, "Don't, Lacy doesn't like her things touched and neither do I."
"Alright, alright."
Honestly, he had only come here to make sure these two weren't cultists or from some other organization or something. Either way, both he and Mbael watched the two bring their stuff down. As Mabel led them inside, Katherine told her, "Thank you, by the way, for offering to help us. You're one of the few kind people I've met in that place."
"Don't mention it. I couldn't just leave you there."
Dipper walked in with them, still suspicious. He hadn't read every report, of course, but everyone read the censored version of the SCP-231 file as part of desensitization. If this woman was telling the truth, then that meant either that horrible document was fake or it was outdated. But he still had to check if she was lying. Sure she knew a lot, but that didn't necessarily mean she was telling the truth. That was why he asked, "So, uh, is Lacy the, you know," he struggled to find the words and settled on making a belly gesture.
"No, she's not," Katherine said in an annoyed voice like Dipper was stupid. "She's adopted. I'm not entirely sure I can have kids and she sure as hell isn't that one."
"You've had a baby, Kathy?"
Katherine glared at Dipper for a moment for exposing her like that before she told Lacy, "Yes, honey, but it was a long time ago."
"What happened to them?"
"They couldn't live with me because I was too young to take care of them and I didn't really want them anyways. So those people at the buildings are taking care of them."
"Oh."
Mabel took the opportunity to distract the child then, telling her, "Come on, Lacy, let me show you to your room."
"Ok!" Lacy followed Mabel happily, already trusting her, certainly more than Dipper.
Katherine seemed a bit uncomfortable. "So, uh, how about I show you where everything is? Unless you wanna unpack first?"
"Somme guidance would help, yes."
Now, there wasn't a lot to show. There was Mabel's yard, a linen closet, a supply closet for Baby's stuff, a pullout couch, a bathroom, and Mabel's office/craft room. That whole time, the tense feeling was there. And it was when he was showing her the yard that he said, "Look, I'm sorry for saying that in front of your kid. I'm sure that if you wanted to tell her about her older brother someday-"
"That thing isn't her older brother."
"Come again?"
"That thing is not her older brother. Lacy has absolutely nothing to do with any of this. If it wasn't for what happened back home, she wouldn't know about any of this, and neither would I. I know you don't believe me, I don't expect you to, but don't involve my daughter in this again." She went quiet for a couple of moments before asking, "So, they were a boy?"
"I actually wouldn't know. I just took a guess."
"Oh." Another moment of silence. "Honestly, I don't even know what they are. They had to put me under and operate on me. Said they didn't want me to suffer more than I already had. When I woke up, I was completely fine, completely healed like nothing happened. The trauma responses didn't even kick in for a month. The foundation should really share that medicine with the rest of the world."
"I'll look into it."
"No, you won't. I appreciate your help, but please don't make false promises stop asking questions, for now at least. Lacy might overhear."
"And I get that, but you have to understand that this is a lot to go through. Breaking through foundation amnestics is rare, it's not exactly a memory gun made in a garage. Plus, for you to be that girl? It's a lot. And, well, your daughter clearly already knew; being scared of scientists is instinctual."
"It's not because you're a scientist, it's because you're a man."
"What?"
"Lacy's been through a lot and the only man in her life to treat her with respect or decency was just brutally murdered in her own home. You and the Scarlet King are not the only monsters that exist. It would do you good to remember that."
"Right."
Lacy then came out of the house and into the yard, telling Katherine, "Mom! Ms. Pines said we can go to the pet store tomorrow if it's ok with you! Please, can we go?" She was holding Baby in her arms, the 15-pound sow piglet slipping from her arms as it snuffled. "
"Yeah, we can, honey-pie. Let me help you with that first though."
Dipper ended up walking back home. It wasn't far but it gave him time to think. Something about this didn't feel right. Everything seemed to add up, she wasn't some operative from the Chaos Insurgency or Serpent's Hand operative. But what was bothering him? It was when he was pondering why a seemingly neutralized SCP had a need for secrecy that he realized. Bill. Bill had mocked him with the implication that 231-7 was still some little girl being tortured at some black site day after day, not a full-grown woman who was living a normal life and making a normal family. She had been that little girl at one point, clearly, but that had changed. Was he seriously trusting Bill's word over what was right in front of him? Was he seriously falling for an ex-triangle's tricks?
With a single-minded determination, he went into the apartment building, rode up the elevator, and slammed his door open. "Bill!"
"What? I was napping." Bill swam out of his hide and looked at Dipper, "What is so important that I can't even sleep?"
He kicked the door closed and said "You're going to tell me everything you know about SCP-231-7."
"Kid, you're smart, you have context clues, you don't want to hear about that."
"Not the containment procedures. You're going to tell me everything about the entity that either inhabited or currently inhabits Katherine Stavros. You're going to tell me everything you know about the seventh daughter of the Scarlet King."
Bill stared at him with a true blank axolotl stare before responding only with, "Shit."
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#discussions of violence#discussions to child abuse#abuse#miscarriage mention#sam speaks#sam writes#dipper pines#mabel pines#scp 231#scp 231-7#gravity falls#scp foundation#dr. bright#dr. clef#fanfic#gravity falls fanfiction#scp foundation fanfiction
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My breasts have shrunk so much since my miscarriage and I’m so self conscious about it
#personal#my post#miscarriage#miscarriage mention#breast size#self conscious#mental health shit#mental health issues#postpartum depression
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Postpartum depression can cause suicide too.
Yes, but it's also not as high as the rate of suicide in post-abortive women.
A 2019 Study on the Maternal Suicide in Italy found that of the maternal suicides included in this study, the suicide rate of women who had abortions was more than double the suicide rate of women who gave birth.
The Finnish study is much older (1996), but it categorized maternal suicides and found the following ratios during 1987-1994 in Finland:
A United States study examining 173,279 low-income California Medicaid patients found that women who underwent abortions had nearly double the chance of dying in the following two years, and “had a 154 percent higher risk of death from suicide” than if they gave birth.
One major study, Pregnancy associated death in record linkage studies relative to delivery, termination of pregnancy, and natural losses: A systematic review with a narrative synthesis and meta-analysis, compared causes of deaths among those who delivered, had an abortion, or miscarried. This is what was found in regards to suicide rates among these women:
Suicide attempts increased after abortion, and typically decreased after birth. Maternal mortality rate in regards to suicide decreased after birth or during pregnancy, and increased substantially after abortion.
All this to say, yes, unfortunately, women experience postpartum depression and some women commit suicide. But the rate of suicide in women who have given birth is much lower than in women who have had an abortion.
-Sarah
#anti abortion#suicide#miscarriage mention#maternal mortality rate#abortion#pro-life#pro life#prolife#ask#asks#discourse#postpartum depression
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Will this AU delve into serious pregnancy-related topics or will this be relatively happy with some traces of angst?
If you mean m!scarriage or birth complications then not really! Most of the angst comes from trauma and the Vees 😇
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