#might go w/ a friend >:) u kno who you are

[vanishingstarrs]

taste ( katsuki bakugo x popstar!reader, sort of established relationship, inspired by please please please by s. carpenter ) ( testing the waters for this fic w a short n’ sweet chap, pls enjoy, drop your thoughts, i have a longer vers coming, sorry for the wait omg i just want this to be soso perfect for y’all )

part one, part two

“Fuck my life.”

“What?” Your best friend, Misaki, asked from the stall beside yours.

You sighed, holding your phone in your hand as you walked out and met up with her at the sinks. You hadn’t even needed to use the restroom, you just wanted to check your messages in private.

“This asshole might actually be decent.” You rolled your eyes as you sent a text back.

“Dynamight?!” She smirked, trying to peek over your shoulder, but you were quick to shield your screen from her and exclaim that she’d get water on your dress if she didn’t quit being nosy while washing up.

“Great Explosion Murder God Dynamight.” You corrected with a grin,“But yeah I guess mostly everyone calls him Dynamight for short.”

“The fact that you know his full on dorky hero name tells me all I need, girl.” She said as she reapplied lipgloss in the mirror.

You scoffed,“Uh, if anyone’s down bad, it’s him, look at this text he just sent.”

k (ृ ु*`ω´)ु: Just leave the lame ass party.

k (ृ ु*`ω´)ु: I’ll come get you.

Misaki gasped,“You dirty little slut, you wouldn’t actually leave me here to go see him would you?”

You hid your face with your hair as you contemplated your answer,“...noooo.”

“You hesitated.”

“Okay, maybe I would like to see him tonight...” You relented,“Would you hate my guts?”

“Not if you call me tomorrow to hash out all the details of your dirty little tryst with the number two hero.” She grinned devilishly.

Lucky for you that no one else had walked into the bathroom since the both of you came in here, you didn’t need everyone hearing all the details of your private life.

“Deal.”

You neglected to tell her that you’d already texted him back.

y/n ʚ♡⃛ɞ(ू•ᴗ•ू❁): how soon can you get here

k (ृ ु*`ω´)ु: Already left, be there in ten.

y/n ʚ♡⃛ɞ(ू•ᴗ•ू❁): meet u outside xo

You left once you saw Misaki make it back to the rest of your friends, waving to them and blowing a kiss from the door before heading to the front of the building and grabbing your coat.

You were just about to put it on when a pair of hands ripped the material from your hold and a voice stated,“Let me help you.”

You watched dumbfounded as Katsuki Bakugo held out your jacket for you, he raised his eyebrow at you, holding it closer to your arms and indicating for you to put them through when you just stared,“Don’t have all night, c’mon, baby.”

You couldn’t help roll your eyes as you finally put it on,“Actually, we do have all night.” You turned around and he carefully pulled your hair out from underneath before his palm found your cheek, a soft caress that had you leaning in instinctively. “How’s it looking out there?”

“Bunch of paps, I’m sorry, they must’ve already known you were here.” He placed a kiss on your cheek as his official hello to you,“Just say the word and I’ll blast them all to hell.”

You snorted,“Yeah, right, and with it your career.” You rolled your eyes again and took his hand in yours,“C’mon, might as well face the music.”

You walked out together, lights flashing in your faces from the moment you opened the door and the paparazzi realized it was you. They began shouting louder once they realized who was with you, Bakugo took the lead though, using a strong arm to push people away from you and yelling,“Touch her and you die!”

Hot, you thought to yourself as you smirked and allowed him to pull you along. Who needed security when you had the number two hero on your arm?

He brought you around to his car,“Dunce face and ears are gonna kill me tomorrow.”

“Who?” You asked, confused.

“My dumb friends.” He scoffed,“They’re huge fans of you, once they realized I’ve kept you a secret they’re gonna freak out and yell at me.”

You chuckled,“Well my friends know so you can tell yours anything you want… within reason.”

He gave you a smug grin and opened the door for you, holding out his hand for you to get in carefully with the tall heels you were wearing. He went around the car and got in himself, finally allowing himself to indulge in a deep kiss now that you had the privacy.

It wasn’t until the next morning when it all began, Misaki spamming your phone with texts and calls about the news articles and asking you to please avoid social media.

You didn’t, of course, too curious for your own good.

You leaned closer into Katsuki’s warmth as you read through the headlines and saw the photos snapped of the two of you hand in hand, your accounts were worse… people online didn’t bother to hide their displeasure. You were suddenly blind, your taste questionable, and everyone was saying you had terrible judgement.

And yet, you couldn’t help disagree as you felt a kiss on the back of your neck and the grip around your waist become slightly tighter.

This thing you had was good, you knew it.

[helloanthy]

tbh i was kind of expecting vriska at the end of the colors of utena

idk if this is python sending this anon because what a coincidence it would be ! but either way ill take this opportunity to share our conversation about hs/rgu from 2 days ago

🐒 munke [10:20 PM] on my last helloanyhy i drew anthy as kanaya mayhaps i should terezi her this time [10:20 PM] not character parallels .jus anthy cosplay things

🐍 python [10:20 PM] terezi [pog]

🐒 munke [10:21 PM] terezis ur rose bride

🐍 python [10:21 PM] anthy cosplays all the homestuck trolls

🐒 munke [10:21 PM] (makes u into bug cannibal)

🐍 python [10:21 PM] om nom nom nom [me turning myself into a bug and also you so i can cannibalize you] [10:22 PM] terezi's name is razor gillette and shes an orchid mantis

🐒 munke [10:22 PM] my brain is getting chemicaliszed so i cabt mental exercise but bow do u think anthy n vriska would get alkng oe not

🐍 python [10:22 PM] ummm… i imagine something similar to how anthy and nanami get along

🐒 munke [10:23 PM] did u kno ladbugs hav to drill a hole thru the females exoskeletob to creat an orifice to mate [10:23 PM] wohldnt that be heinous [10:23 PM] rips u a new asshole

🐍 python [10:23 PM] vriska: does not agree with anthy's submission so she comes in with a lot of bluster [10:23 PM] anthy: 🙂

🐒 munke [10:23 PM] omg. vrisknami ?+ [10:24 PM] nariska

🐍 python [10:24 PM] nanami is not A vriska, i think, but she feels very adjacent to me [10:24 PM] i need 2 ponder that one more [10:24 PM] i do know i consider wakaba and jade to be similar though [10:25 PM] i think vriska considers anthy to be very boring. so she might provoke her a lot. like how she was w aradiabot [10:25 PM] but also that was bc vriska considered aradia a friend… so idk with a stranger she might just be rude

🐒 munke [10:26 PM] wait ur wakajade parraleld [10:26 PM] i would like to hear defensr

🐍 python [10:26 PM] theyre both sidelined by the plot very heavily [10:26 PM] w wakaba its like lampshaded but w jade less so [10:26 PM] they both couldve been the protag in another comic

🐒 munke [10:27 PM] ahhhh [10:27 PM] rebound girlies ……..

🐍 python [10:27 PM] theyre both aware of how distant they r from the canon… and hate it [10:27 PM] yeas… [10:28 PM] i think the difference is that jade was sidelined bc she was too powerful for the plot. like she is the most involved in sburb of the beta kids (her life does not truly begin until they enter the game) but shes also the least involved in all the big battles bc shes too strong [10:28 PM] the hand of god taking her off the table… [10:28 PM] i think wakaba is just sidelined bc its not her story LOL [10:29 PM] like she HAS her own plot she can be involved in (shes the princess of that other world or whatever and she literally found her prince) but she doesnt want it ‼‼ she wants to be in this one. [10:30 PM] thats all i have maybe theres another utena character who jade is a closer analog to idk [10:33 PM] i think in terms of like… placement irt the plot? vriska's thing is that the story is always trying to sideline her but she (and also the hand of god very transparently) keeps putting her back in. and also terezi did that once too lol. but nanami and vriska share a similar role of … being subjected to a lot of humiliation (plot wise) but also their backstories are a trauma dump. and also ofc the personalities

and today

🐒 munke [1:13 PM] did u send me an anon on hehlloanthy about vriska

🐍 python [1:13 PM] not at all [1:13 PM] what does it say ⁉️⁉️⁉️‼️⁉️‼️⁉️

🐒 munke [1:13 PM] 🤨

🐍 python [1:13 PM] BELIEB ME

🐒 munke [1:13 PM] ok well im ghonna post our conversation about rgu/hs parallels then [1:13 PM] just to share 💜

🐍 python [1:15 PM] okay addendum to what i said before [1:18 PM] for homestuck, rheres a difference between hussie the self insert joke and hussie the wielder of the hand of god. re: vriska remaining relevant via the hand of god. like hussies self insert is an allegory for the narrative going off the rails and out of their control. but ofc like theyre the one still writing and arting for it, so they arent truly divorced from the narrative decisions jn the real world. DOES THIS MAKE SENSE

🐒 munke [1:22 PM] yes

🐍 python [1:22 PM] i just want to circumvent the haters 😈

🐒 munke [1:22 PM] HSFJDFJSKDHFOKDSJ

[seraphinashaw]

Hi! I forgot my original question but I guess I'll ask you some other things 💚

❥ Do you like Melanie Martinez? If so, what's your favorite album/song?

❥ What's your favorite color? >:D <3 (Mines Green, purple and yellow :>)

❥ What's your opinion on the group? (Killian, Julius, Seamus, Kelly, etcetera)

❥ What's the worst part of being a woman? (I LOVE how you're trans! I'm a natural born woman and I rlly wanna be a boy. But I WANNA HEAR WOMAN FROM YOUR POV, DEAR <3)

SMALL RANT ON WHAT I LUV ABT YOU <<33

I LOVE your albinism! I love people that are albino, have vitiligo, etcetera! They're so eye-catching and so are you! You're absolutely gorgeous and I 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 your clothing choice!

Smash. You're just- SO BEAUTIFUL AND BADASS AND I LOOOOVVVVEEEEE YOUUUUU!!!!!!!

☆ Have an amazing day/night!!!! ☆

✫ ℳℯ𝒾ℳℯ ✫

omg hi babes xx so many questions 4 me!! 😳 sry if i get a wee bit incoherent i'm still hung over 😹😹 i'll do my best to answer ❤ this might get long just cuz of the amount of questions asked LMAO

i've known about mel from the start, but to be real and controversial here i'm not rly interested in her music? like it just isn't rly my style i don't like it very much LMAO, it's kinda um... teenager music 2 me, sorry if ur a fan lol. i do think she has a nice voice tho

as 4 my fav colour.... have 1 look at my wardrobe choices and notice the only colour i wear other than black 😹 i'm a purple girl all the way 😼 i like matching my eye colour LOL

the other girlies are crazy LMAOOO they definitely took some getting some used 2. i'm used 2 being the crazy one but they make me look normal 😭😭 2 be real with u i thought killian was cishet at first... 💀 and he got RLY mad when he learned of this 😹 (can u blame me tho? he literally is into ancient rome and his misogyny is smth else 💀) as for julius, um. he gave me free gender affirming surgery and did a good fucken job sooo legally i can't say anything bad 😹 he is like a bestie 2 me, even if he doesn't acknowledge anybody as a friend LMAO. seamus and kelly are rly smth else too, i love hanging w/ them cuz there's always smth mad going on w them😹😹

the worst part of being a woman, mmm. the underboob sweat 😹 jk sorryyy LMAO. i can tell u as some1 who's presented as male b4 that ppl def are much, much nicer and more lenient w/ u whenever ur a man. i also need 2 be more cautious ig now that i pass as female? cuz men LOVE 2 try pulling things w/ me thinking i'm 'vulnerable' and all that. i have stood strong tho, i haven't rly had too many problems myself cuz i'm a bad bitch, and they never know what's coming 😼 if u decide 2 transition 1 day ull prolly notice the opposite will happen 2 u, i hear this from transmasc ppl at least.

girll u rlly made my day with this 😽 keep this up and ull make me blush LMAO. thank u tho 😌 i kno i'm hot and cool but the reminder is always welcome 😼

u have a good day 2 babes xx

[equalseleventhirds]

havin a convo w/ someone abt motw and a bad experience they had with it and the thought occurs that (largely bcos it is the game recced most often to ppl who are tired of d&d) most ppl treat it like modern-day d&d

.....or rather, like the version of d&d popularized by actual play shows, which is rules-lite roleplay-heavy game where you hang out with your friends and tell whatever story you like (gayly, usually)

and so they get tired of real d&d with all its. well. its. you know the game. anyway, so then they try motw

unforch motw is, while lighter on rules and heavier on roleplay than d&d, actually a game with a very set story that it is trying to tell: that is, monster arrives in place, group goes on a 'learn about monster' adventure (by researching it in libraries, interviewing witnesses, seeing traces of the monster and perhaps skirmishing with it but not having an all-out fight with it yet, and, key here, the gm providing that information as the players search for it. really providing it.)

and then, after learning about it, to go confront the monster and kill it/subdue it/drive it out of town/whatever

(in, of course, the style of monster of the week shows; you should be thinking really hard about buffy, spn, scooby doo, as you run it. think of each mystery like one of those episodes, with a hard end of the monster goes away forever, they learn a lesson, and then on to the next monster. with some exceptions, but nevertheless.)

like absolutely not meant as a 'if ur not doing this ur a bad ttrpg player/gm', i'm not trying to tell you you're playing it wrong in a gatekeepy way i s2g, but like. motw is so often wildly misrepresented, and i think that's led to, like this person i was talkign to, some ppl having a shitty experience with it, or even just, not quite getting the hang of it and going back to d&d. and if you're playing the game and finding that it's not meshing well with the totally different story you're trying to tell. that's not your fault or your story's fault, but uh....... might be a disconnect with the mechanics.

and it's a good game on its own! but the way ppl treat it is. unfortunate.

also there are other games that will do what you want them to do, if you're looking to tell a different sort of story. u kno. branch out.

...............also frankly as a game designer i'm a little exasperated that it's treated as 'pbta standard' as though pbta even HAS a standard (it does not, it's been adapted in so so so many ways and motw wasn't even the FIRST, go take a look at apocalypse world and view the format totally differently, dammit.)

[wokeleftistmob]

[ID: Ten screenshots from various social media sites with characters from the Great Ace Attorney placed over top.

1. Susato says, "reminder that i'm very sweet and endearing so be nice to me". Ryunosuke replies, "or what". "or i'll punch your lights out".

2. Ryunosuke says in despair, "Forgot that I had asked my homie what kind of teddy grahams he wanted". Attached is a screenshot of DMs between Kazuma and Ryunosuke. Kazuma says, "Honey". Ryunosuke answers, "Yea wassup", then dejectedly adds, "Just realized u was saying the flavor u wanted. Not addressing me endearingly".

4. Kazuma says, "if ur hiking thru the woods anytime and u see me knife fighting w someone dont worry about involving urself or anything. its just me and my friends having a homoerotic bonding experience."

5. Van Zieks says, "You people love vampires so much but groan about how it gets dark so early now. Think about how w- they feel for a change".

6. Herlock speaks in all caps for the entire conversation. He asks, "Wat r ur adjectives". Ryunosuke responds, "U mean my pronouns??". "No I already kno ur pronouns wat r ur adjectives". "Uh I dunno? What r urs?". "Noisy an chaotic". "I've never had something go from making no sense 2 complete sense so fast".

7. Ryunosuke talks about Natsume, "no more catboys. catmen . 28 yr old washed up depressed catman downing his 5th whiskey glass and his cat ears twitch depressedly". Herlock responds talking about Van Zieks, "And then he pushes the empty glass forlornly off the counter".

8. Yujin Mikotoba talks about Sholmes. "this is my pet detective". "every couple of days i toss a pumpkin full of newspaper clippings into its enclosure". "it's all all dead ends of course but it's an important enrichment activity for it to construct its intricate red-yarn webs, as it might in the wild".

9. Enoch Drebber says, "bastard's degree". He then talks about Harebrayne, "bastard of sciences". Natsume adds on talking about Shamspeare, "motherfucker of arts".

10. Van Zieks calls Ryunosuke, "my esteemed rival,"; he calls Kazuma, "my beloved nemesis,"; and he calls Herlock "dearly detested".

11. Stronghart talks about Jigoku, "Been fucking this dude who is NOT CUTE LMAO but he is cool to hang out w & I be faking like I don't got me a little crush but I do 😊 I like his lil ugly ass. He's shot two people". End ID]

*picks up a gun on the floor of the crime scene so that i am immediately accused of doing murder*

[ji-lixie]

also im throwing this here bc i have a dream tag for a reason

(copied from my dms to a friend)

ok so basically. i dont remember if it was televised or not (i THINK it might have been bc someone later mentions cutting something out if absolutely necessary but i never saw cameras anywhere or anything so???). i was on some sort of like… not survivor exactly lmao but a competition thing that was probably some sort of reality show too?

and idk there was this guy that i had the biggest crush on in high school (also unfortunately not the first time ive dreamed abt him like this ughh) who was on my team a lot and he'd continuously be flirty w me? holding my hand and saying stuff, teasing me, etc. like i think it was going on before the dream n whatnot bc i felt like it'd been happening for a while if tht makes sense since i only came in on like. Not The First Episode lmao

and idk we're all teamed up for something, waiting on ppl to pass word around or w/e, and he's literally sitting there with an arm around me, playing with my fingers when a woman on another team calls out something to him about how '(name) doesn't like you now, but give her a week lol, i'm sure she'll change her mind" (whoever it was was like. on another team entirely, im not subbing out my gov name haha id just say daisy) and i remember being like… SO thrown like um. what. why is she saying that. and the guy kinda laughs it off or w/e and says its just a joke but idk i think it bothered me a lot bc of what happens next

where we're like. in a car. taking turns getting out every so often to check around the city for more details for the quest we're supposed to be fulfilling? so that we can ykno pass it. and at one point its just the two of us in the car and im like 'you kno what, im done. i used to have the biggest crush on you in high school, but i never said or did anything because i was scared of getting hurt, and i know you never liked me back anyway so it didnt matter--but im tired of hiding it' and idk what he said back but it ended w him being kinda mad and him getting out of the car since our other teammate came back and hes like 'its ur turn' or w/e (clearly upset) so i go off to do w/e

and idk i barely remember the rest of it from there. i found the clues that we needed, we come back together, my team splits bc not all of us have to participate in the challenge (it was some sort of dance thing lol so i was automatically taken out like 'we've seen u' and i was like 'fair'). and idk i started feeling guilty bc i just kinda assumed his feelings on the situation + didn't rly let him talk. i don't remember if we got to talk before or after a small bit of someone pulling us aside like 'ok we CAN edit that whole confession situation out because it's messy but also please let us keep it in because it's messy'

[jadipose]

Lingerie and everything! She's been on the cover a couple times... if you're a regular reader, you've definitely seen her. And, yeah, she's got less time to relax than you might think, though she's got it better than a lot of models who work on a contract basis. She finds it really rewarding though! She doesn't consider herself too vain of a person, but she loves seeing her shoots... they make her look so pretty, she muses. You find nice and mean people in every industry, she says, and modelling at her level is no different. It all depends on whether you get lost in the rat race of LA. She's got model friends who are really down to earth, and some who are kind of prissy and stuck up... She starts to tell you about when a light caught on fire at one of her shoots when the resort worker shows with the food!

o+h, my sto+mach gro+wls no+isily, and I give her a chagrined smile. So+rry, jeez, it must be all this wo+rldly cuisine, I just can't get eno+ugh o+f it. Feeling a little self-co+nscio+us but no+ less hungry because o+f it, I take bo+th plates and set hers do+wn gingerly o+n her to+wel, making sure it's perfectly level so+ no+thing slides o+r stains. Lo+o+ks go+o+d, do+esn't it?

She IS pretty, I'll co+nfirm, tho+ugh I'm sure she hears that all the time! She seems very so+phisticated, but no+t in a way that makes her unappro+achable. O+therwise, I wo+uldn't have, yo+u kno+w, appro+ached her.

O+h, co+me o+n, Po+rrim.

Befo+re I can say so+mething else dumb, I find refuge in my meal, taking the biggest bite o+f burger she's ever seen and clo+sing my eyes. Go+d, I feel like an assho+le stuffing my face with meat in fro+nt o+f her no+w.

[hirokiyuu]

thinking abt yuujins fam

current ages assume yuujin is 17 (ie the age at which they wound up in twst at the v start)

papa

i dont have a name for this guy yet

he/him, 50s i think

has some sort of job that keeps him away from the house 90% of the time. i dont THINK he works overseas but he either a) works in tokyo living in his own apt bc the cost of a shitty leopalace is less than the commute time to their place in kanagawa or b) might be like. a train driver? was the other one i was thinking of????? lmao. either way he's only at the actual family home like one weekend every few months. its always a big deal when hes home

loves his wife+kids but desperately overworked. would like to be home more often but doesnt have the money at any local jobs to stay near them. gaman attitude to life

only child i think

hikari (mama)

she/her, 50s as well but a little younger than papa

office worker. one of those horribly overworked kinds. probably works in yokohama and has to commute like two hours a day. gone by the time most of hte kids wake up, home late enough she doesnt see them either.

loves her kids a lot but overindulgent. spoils all of them but also relies a little too much on yuujin (guy who is like :) i like cooking and helping mama! as a kid. not realizing he is signing himself up for The Horrors) does understand its not normal but yuujin doesnt complain so she doesnt do anything and also kind of cant given that she is again, horrendously overworked

wanted a lot of kids her whole life. adores them all. wishes she could have more time to tkae care of them but as we all know, The Cost of Living In Japan

yuujin goes here. 17, he/him (eventually they/them), if u need me to say moer than you have not been following my blog

mitsuki

she/her, 15

first year of high school

Extremely self-centered. well aware her ability to get out of hte house w/o having to rely on their parents ever releis a Lot on her being self-sufficient and is trying to play into her own strengths. also just hates being home so she's out doing Overachiever Things a lot but also going to karaoke and making friends and spending as little time at home as possible

will stay up to get allowance from mom, who should not be giving it to her but does bc she loves all her kids a bit too much

mutsumi

she/her, 13

yuujin's best friend. lmao.

chubby otaku. got bullied a lot in grades 5/6, situation got somewhat better in middle school but still doesnt really have any friends besides yuujin

shy + meek, doesn't know how to talk to people. wants to help yuujin more around the house but having so little self confidence means she needs a Lot of handholding and ends up creating more work for him so hes usually just like. go sit down and then tell me abt w/e manga youre into rn

only one that knows yuujins gay, a secret she guards w/her life

ruito

he/him, 11

sixth grader. loooooves yuujin more than anyone in existence! this is Not a Good Thing

sporty, thoughtless, jealous. wants yuujins time but yuujin has no time to give, which manifests in him being mad that mutsumi is the clear favorite and trying to bother yuujin when yuujin is Doing Other Things.

the next ones are more tenuous. i was thinking of yuujin as eldest of seven which i think means One of these needs to be a set of twins but idk which one and what would be most fun. i have runa + the problem child more set in terms of personality but the last kid is like....... so ambiguous theyre just floating midair to me u kno

runa

she/her, 9 or 10?

fourth grader. loves idols and wants to be one

does Not have the money to be an idol fan but through the power of begging and having an overindulgent mama has a semi-decent collection of merch. this drives yuujin insane

less problem causing than some of the other sibs but still causing problems. u kno how it is

youngest child

he/him so far, 5?

first grader. Terrible

bitey. wants to Go. immense handful. cause of every single one of yuujins headaches. constantly trying to run out of the house into traffic, thinks its funny when yuujin has to chase after him. probably in trouble for behavioral problems at school All the Time

ambiguous other child

moody type?

identical twin. probalby will develop a complex abt this in several years time (if youngest's twin) or has already started to (if runa's)

a ltitle bit forgotten given how many strong personalities are ni the fam. will occasionally lock themself up in their room if neglected tho which Causes Probelms and yet givs them attention which thereby reinforces the behavior lol

anyways. thoughts. i have them

[let-djaqsayfuck]

the bbc robin hood characters n their red flags:

Robin

-hero complex

-mommy daddy AND brother issues like damn hun pick a family member

-kind of a whore

-might have punched a wall

-can do backflips. never trust a man who can do a backflip. this is non negotiable

-ur hulu best have ads or else

-cannot apologize to save his life

Much

-never takes off his carhartt beanie

-“bros before hoes” aka would drop u for robin in a heartbeat

-that run. the way he runs. wtf. little penguin lookin ass—

Will

-gave his dad son issues

-don’t like the look in his eye if i’m being honest

-“car guy” vibes 🚩🚩🚩

-but overall he has the least amount of red flags i love him A+ bf material

Allan a Dale

-“what up bitch can i have a dollar? ugh for a slushee,, i kno you have one open ur purse”

-might rob you blind

-would borrow your car, get in a fender bender and most definitely NOT tell you about it

-any gift you receive from him will get repossessed bc he has stolen it

Tuck

-catholic

-gives unsolicited advice

-idk what his deal is but can he even date??? can friars date?? girl idk but also tucks my 4liferr idc what you guys say

-the way he grabbed that gravel unsettled me

Little John

-he’s married (? taken*?) so

-but i mean hey

-cannot pass a background check

Djaq

-she is perfect no red flags 2 speak of

-would probably forget you in the target parking lot

-judgy but rightfully so

-will always be wittier than u so if u can’t handle that u will never b compatible

Marian

-outdresses you at every event. yea sometimes it is on purpose, die mad ab it

-leaves you on read for hours but will show up at ur doorstep w a stab wound like “oh the bleeding? it’s in a non vital area it’s fine we can go get chipotle now”

-has all the tea on everyone. like not in a fun gossipy way, a “how does she know this much personal information about everyone” and it gets you thinking how much does she know about you?????

-the answer is everything be very scared

-has side hoes. u r probably one of them

Kate

-shanks as a warning

-“i’m a chill girl” she is n o t

-shoplifts but only at franchises she has personal vendettas against (it is a long list, panera being thee top 1)(yes you have had to drive a getaway car stuffed w trash bags full of bagels)

-saw her mugshot on the news, she told you dont worry abt it babes

Isabella

-gaslight gatekeep girlboss

-every time u jokingly ask her how many ppl she’s stabbed, her response keeps changing w increasingly random numbers

-plays games >:( specifically, political ones that involve huge scandals and coups. sexy, but a red flag regardless

-talks about you to her friends but in a way where they all laugh discreetly and arch their eyebrows knowingly at each other from behind their wine glasses. you don’t know what this means but it’s unnerving

Roy

-says he “has his own car” but it’s actually a scooter

-can’t communicate v well

-gave a baby a lightbulb to play with once

-cheesy pickup lines that he 100% believes are smooth

-very easily convinced by the flat earth theory, but will never fall for a multi level marketing scheme pitch

Sheriff

-he’s a gemini

-what else do u need to know? babe RUN

Guy

-he is a walking red flag LOOK AT HIM

-owns more knives than shirts and makes you look at them while he talks about all the unique ways u can kill ppl w them

-got 1 tattoo and made it his whole personality

-has never once talked about his feelings. he told you his favorite season then immediately apologized “for getting all vulnerable”

-hung up on his ex 🙄

[seishun-emergency]

Hm, maybe I was a bit too rough with my last ask! Hehe! So my next batch will be dubbed "mermaid anon's little sillies": Torikasa, Yuuta/Shinobu, Nazuna/Kuro, and Hiyojun (yesyes it's the third time I'm asking about an eden ship but I care them; you might as well complete the square with Jun/Ibara and Hiyori/Nagisa while you're at it lol)!

LOL "rough" is a way to put it . more just "are these opinions that could get me cancelled????? probably not but should i be worried about it?????" ive had some horrid fandom experiences before dont worry about it you're completely fine

mermaid anon's little sillies .... i like what we have going on here tbh !!! all fun ships

torikasa - YES. yes. i am such a fan of torikasa . childhood friends to rivals that genuinely respect one another . also the princess/knight motifs MMM i will eat that shit up always. they do care about each other sooo much inspite of/because of their rivalry and want 2 push each other to become better and not fall too far behind the other.... im obsessed w them so deeply. also their banter is so funny tsukasa seems so constantly done with tori and tori is like hehe. tsukasa will haaaate this . going to tease the shit out of him. and then he does

yuushino - yknow i know less abt their actual canon dynamic than i'd like to admit (i STILL have not found a tl of shiny first years) but i do know that they're friends!!! and quite good ones at that :> from what i know abt them i get the idea that they care abt each other a lot and they're very important to one another. they seem very calm and stable as a romantic pairing (aside from yknow . the usual that comes with being a teenager in love)

the rest of the polyeden square - i could literally talk about polyeden forever i hope u kno. i think hiyojun are fun tbh !! there's a Bit of a power dynamic thing w the context of how reimei works but honestly i think even as hiyori plays into the jun being his pet/servant bit, he still makes sure to recognize jun as his whole, own person. he's said that he picked jun for a reason and because he sees qualities in jun that he admires, and hiyori's so outright about love and the love he has for his unitmates . jun also isn't afraid to call hiyori out on his shit. also they just have such a funny dynamic they contain multitudes and the multitudes are so funny. nagihiyo are just . they are so in love and devoted and important to one another. childhood friends to lovers real i think theyve been at least a little in love with each other their entire lives. they also see each other as equals which is sosososo important for both of them - nagisa in particular esp considering Why hiyori's family took him in but i think nagisa bein able to recognize hiyori and see how hiyori stands out and see him as more than the second tomoe son is really important 2 their dynamic. jun and ibara :3 i like that they call each other soulmates as a bit but also like yeah. they get each other. they're both really determined hardworking ppl who have 2 deal with nagisa and hiyori's insanity and also have a harder time accepting love or being vulnerable due to needing to be strong as means of escaping some of their hardships in the past. also its like girlboss4malewife u know . girlboss ibara comes back from a hard day in the office to her quiche-making boywife jun sazanami

[mymarifae]

i took like 5 benadryl to help me get sleepy so now i’m getting those Sleepytime Images and i knew i’d need to share this one w u bc it involves ur epic girlboss giselle so here we go:

i kno u mentioned how toriel and giselle have a very tense relationship and how kris and berdly dating Might pose some problems for giselle so just. imagine if you will. kris and berdly decide to go to the sadie hawkmans dance (or prom or whatever big dance of ur choice) like As A Thing. not just as friends but like. yknow. Going Together. and giselle’s happy on one hand bc ohhh her little boy is growing up he has a date!!!!! but on the other hand she’s like ah fuck. now i ACTUALLY have to talk to toriel (not for like. permission or anything. but esp w a big dance u gotta like coordinate outfits and meeting times and who’s taking pictures at What House—idk i went to prom alone but i remember this being a thing for a lot of my friends in relationships)

so she decides to be the mature adult abt things and invites toriel and kris over to her house for dinner (w berdly there of course). and Oh My God does it go poorly. shit is just AWKWARD right off the bat like giselle will try a joke and it just Does Not Land w toriel and so she just has to laugh it off while thinking “jesus christ is this how asgore feels???” like idk i don’t think toriel holds active animosity but i’m sure whatever lore u have for them both means toriel isn’t giselle’s biggest fan. esp w seeing berdly being so emotionally shut-in and independent. and it’s awkward for berdly and kris too bc they want this dinner to Work bc they want their parents to Like Each Other so things aren’t Weird but they’re also not rlly sure how to help??? and also they’re just nervous in general bc now the parent of their partner is here in the room w them so they both must be on their best behavior

this is mostly bc i’m picturing a dinner scene a la shrek 2 and i think it is so real it hurts. it’s made even better by the thought that giselle is probably so not used to cooking big meals since she mostly orders out (or berdly cooks for himself—he’s actually pretty good) so the cooking scene is a nightmare and it rlly colors the dinner scene So Well. by the end of the night things do get better tho. i think giselle and toriel sit w wine while the two kids play video games in berdlys room and they talk abt life and being single moms and giselle gets like. rlly honest?? which is New for her. and toriel can tell she means well and rlly is taking big leaps in being a strong presence in berdlys life so they forge a kind of bond. maybe a friendship! maybe not. up to u honestly it’s ur character i just like playing in the space and had to share :-)

eating a salad rn and the shrek 2 bit made me inhale a piece of lettuce because every time i think of that scene i think about this specifically now

so i was just imagining giselle spinning around in her office chair - that she for some bizarre reason decided to bring to the dinner table instead of sitting in a normal chair - while toriel glares daggers and kris and berdly watch in awkward silence. and it killed me

ANYWAY IT'S FUNNY YOU BRING THIS UP because i was actually thinking about the same scenario. berdly actually didn't tell giselle he was going to the dance with kris as a Date at first, because just. habit of not talking to her about important things. and then he belatedly remembers they're on better terms so he tells her, awkwardly, and he's like BUT YOU DON'T NEED TO MAKE A BIG DEAL OUT OF IT OR ANYTHING, it's just a silly little dance.

much to his despair, giselle does make a big deal about it and she's like pestering him with questions about what he's going to wear, what kris is going to wear, are you two coordinating??? you two better be coordinating-- by this point she's known they were dating but if they're serious enough to go to the dance together, aka something that is really not up either of their alleys AT ALL,

maybe she should do that thing she's been putting off for a while now. talking to toriel. establishing just a bit of common ground with her. and so Dinner

toriel doesn't hold active animosity at all !! it's more so something giselle has fostered like - SHE responded to toriel with unnecessary hostility and toriel was like ok that's the game we're playing...?? basically toriel reached out to her a long time ago, when berdly was in her elementary class, because she had concerns about giselle's parenting and was worried she was letting work eat up too much of her time. stuff like giselle always being the last parent to come pick up berdly after school, berdly's marked aversion to joining the other kids in play, etc.

giselle's kind of a young mom? i guess if berdly is like 15-16 she's like... 34. so when this confrontation happened, she was still quite the hotheaded, spunky youngster (she's mellowed out a lot now). and she didn't take kindly to toriel's "overstepping" and kind of. blew up. "berdly is an incredibly capable child and does not need me smothering him the way YOU smother your own children."

yeah idk it's basically a butting of heads over parenting styles. toriel believes a child needs constant nurturing, and giselle believes a child needs Room to grow and needs the space to do their own thing. both of them take their respective approaches too far - toriel IS in fact smothering, and giselle is too distant. toriel has always been more mature than giselle and has been open to reconciliation from day one, if giselle will bow her head and take the steps to pursue it. which she hasn't been humble enough to do Until Now

the dinner is a bit of a mess. giselle is not a good cook and underestimates how long food takes to cook, so kris and toriel arrive a long time before anything is ready. berdly is Trying to help. he's begging her to let him help because she's so bad at this it's painful to watch. she keeps shooing him away - "i'm being a mom right now okay?! I'M going to cook for YOU." and once kris gets there she bans him from the kitchen entirely ("what is kris going to think? go spend time with them!")

i was thinking toriel actually helps her finish dinner instead ^^ which eases some of the tension and makes it easier for them to connect a bit later, when the kids aren't present. because when a teenager feels awkward they have this special power of making everyone else in the room feel 10x more awkward than they do. it's painful to sit through and berdly and kris eat as fast as physically possible and excuse themselves and i really do like the idea of toriel and giselle sitting together over a glass of wine or two... they'll never be besties but they have the potential to become decent friends once giselle sets some of her fiery pride aside :)

[plushievash]

4:02 am questions: all prime numbers

oh thats a fun way to do it putting it under a readmore so its not too long <3

2. Do you mourn for a place or person you’ve never known? yeah, occasionally, when i think too hard abt it i mourn the person i couldve been if i wasnt u kno...

3. Do you really think there is somebody for everybody? yes! multiple people even! <3

5. Do you have to be related to be family? of course not! <3 just a few of my best friends ive never met irl that i consider family are renee, emry, n eli <3<3

7. Are you in love? Do you want to be? i think so yes

11. Would you change your appearance if you could? i can and i will >:) im making myself into who ive always been! isnt that great? <3

13 - answered!

17. Did you have imaginary friends? Do you still have them? i dont think so unless u count plushies ?

19. If you aren’t religious, do you wish you were? Why? im not anymore...sometimes i wish i was because i felt like i owed that to my lolo and lola (though they never pressured me into it.. i just felt like it could be a way to honour them)

23. Is love about convenience or something more? Can it be about both? i dont know what it means abt convenience so.. something more!! love is the way u get excited abt ur fave things; love is ur friends sharing their fave things w u; ect ect !! <3 love is everywhere bestie <3 maybe corny as hell but im tired of being embarrassed and depressed !! theres so much love in everything and its nice to think abt :) !

29. Do you believe in some form of god/s? no? i dont like to think abt it too hard

31. Do you have a hunch about how you’re going to die? i believe im meant to drown as irrational or insane as that might sound i always had a feeling i was meant to drown.. even when i was little if i started to drown i wouldnt freak out because i just ? trusted the water ? deciding it was my time to go ? but when i get extremely paranoid im afraid i will be hit by a car or killed by a random act of violence

37. Do opposites attract? magnets! yes :) ok ok sorry. maybe. idk w/e lol

41. What fundamentally matters do you? money fun and my besties <3

43. Do you create art? How do you define art? WELL. yes <3 i do my funnie little drawings :) how do u define art? who give a shit <3

47. Do you have to suffer to truly understand the human condition? What is the human condition? How can you really experience it? there will always be suffering in life but thats not all it is

53. Which beliefs do you have that is most likely to be wrong? nothing. i know everything so jot that down. <3

59. What do you think the next era of music will be like? i dont know bestie... i listen to the same songs on repeat for years on end </3 penis music.

61. Do we live in tumultuous times, or do they just seem so strange because we’re living in them? oh it is very tumultuous times

67. What’s the worse thing a person can be? abuser obvs

71. Would your life make a good play? yes im the most interesting person in the world hope this helps <3 it has to be a musical

73. Would you fight for your country? Do you feel a sense of loyalty to your nation? AS FUCKING IF LMFAOOOOOO

79. When you are sad, do you listen to music that conveys your emotions or music that makes you happy? sad music my beloved <3

83. Given the chance to live your life on Mars, with no hope of returning to Earth but with the promise of scientific discovery and glory, would you take it? yaes... i want to get killed in space seems fun

89. If you lost all your memories, would you have the same personality? losing ALL my memories is something that freaks me out so much i have such a huge paranoia abt it i do not want to think abt it

97. Are you overly analytical? perhaps but my thoughts and my brain is sexy so its ok :) (bonus fact 97 is my fave number)

[cescalr]

u kno how everyone has their own version of Reverse Falls?? well i have one of those lol but rn what im saying is: my version of the au where the pines twins swap places (grunkles for mystery,,,, u kno,,, i think its called Gravity Rises? Anti-Gravity??? I can’t remember damn) yeah i have little bits of dialogue written,,,, if only i could draw... anyway all under the read more:

[[the scene where Mabel cheats off of Dipper in class; prev the scene where Stan cheats off Ford. Flashback to convo;]]

Dipper: Look. All you need is decent grades in math, right? Just copy off me. 'S not like the teachers pay attention during exams, anyway.

Mabel: I dunno, Dipper...

Dipper: Come on. We need scolarships. Our parents can't afford two full rides to college.

Mabel: It feels kinda... fraud-y, though.

Dipper: Think about it this way, hey - those rich kids pay their way past exams to a full ride, this is no more unfair than that. Just levelling the playing field. They're cheating at life - you're just opening up opportunities.

Mabel: True...

Dipper: Anyway. Nobody gets left behind, right?

Mabel: Haha. Yeah. Who's to say I won't leave /you/ behind? [punches his arm, with a smile.]

Dipper: Hah. Very funny.

Mabel: Thanks, bro-bro. Awkward sibling hug?

Dipper: Awkward sibling hug.

[hug]

Both: Pat-pat.  

---

[[Big argument! Replaces the ford accuses Stan of breaking his machine. The conversation with the headmaster [uhhh, principal? in america?? i dunno im sorry] of the school is done w/ Dipper replacing Stan and Mabel replacing Ford bc I Like To Make Things Interesting!]]

Mabel: Come on, Dipper! I mean. Just - what kind of money is in /paranormal investigation/, anyway?

Dipper: What kind of money is in sculpting?

Mabel: That's not fair.

Dipper: Neither is you repeating our parents' talking points, but here we are. It's not about the money, Mabel.

Mabel: Well if it's not, then what's the point of you being on the opposite kind of the country to me?

Dipper: What's the point of you being on the opposite side of the country to /me/? Oh, that's right. You got a full ride anywhere you'd like, and there I am, trouble-maker, crazy-guy extraordinaire with the weird interests and stuipd belief in the supernatural. There was only one film school that'd take me, Mabel. You're the one who locked yourself into California.

Mabel: Why didn't you /tell/ me?

Dipper: I didn't think you'd want me around that much. What have I ever done, except pull down your stupid reputation?

Mabel: You can't still be on that. You know I don't-

Dipper: Still didn't say anything, though did you?

Mabel: That's not fair at all, Dipper.

Dipper: You never say anything. And here I am, always defending you. Maybe I felt we needed some space, huh? Maybe you give off the aura of wanting space. I'm not fun to be around.

Mabel: I didn't mean that. I just meant - you can get... kind of into a headspace I can't follow. I'm not - I don't believe in all your -

Dipper: Dumb conspiracies?

Mabel: Yes! Dipper, just - there's nothing down that road. You know that. You'll be -

Dipper: A laughingstock? Been there. Used to it.

Mabel: It doesn't have to be like that. You're really, really smart-

Dipper: So the only thing I can want to do is science?

Mabel: No, that's not it at all -

Dipper: He's a punk, he's headed nowhere, 'Mabel's a good girl, a real talent, smart and artistic... Dipper has the brain for a good life, but not the mindset. There's Fantartstic Academy, it's in California, so it's not too far from home, but it's on the other side of the state, a good distance away - I think it'd be good for your daughter to get independence, to find friends and a life outside of the trouble her brother brings. Mabel could have a real good go of it -'

Mabel: Stop it! Dipper, you know I don't believe-

Dipper: But you do! You always have!

Mabel: Just because you're /anxious/ doesn't mean you're right! We're okay! You're just paranoid!

Dipper: That's not fair.

Mabel: Oh, so now /I'm/ the unfair one? I get it. Things are only unfair when it affects /you/.

[pause]

Mabel: Why d'you have to do this?

Dipper: I - I have to prove that I'm right, Mabel. I have to. This stuff exists, I know it does, I've just got to find it.

Mabel: And, what? You're going to prove something people have been trying to figure out for centuries? Dipper. How can you tell me to get out of dreamworld when that's where you're staying?

Dipper: Screw you.

Mabel: Screw /you/.

---

As for other stuff;

Mabel makes the portal! It takes Dipper 30 years to activate it after she’s pushed in bc her instructions are Terrible. Partly because she didn’t understand much of it. Bill painted the whole thing as like, a monument of the arts or w/ever im still figuring that one out 

Dipper takes Grunkle Stan’s place as the person they’re sent to visit. He’s been pretending Mabel’s been in various foreign countries for years @ this point. Uses either magic/tech to create voicemails for the family, has her be bubbly but distant, w/ promises to visit that she never keeps, which. you know he feels bad about but he needs to make people think she’s alive

Dipper had a ghost hunting TV show! For like three years, then went off the air bc of low ratings. Apparently real ghosts scare people! And kill them. Who knew. Also everyone thought the special effects were bad. Whoops. Anyway he runs a tourist attraction out of Mabel’s old ‘nature living art lodge’. It makes a good haunted house during high traffic at halloween/Summerween. The entrance to the basement is in his office, which used to be one of Mabel’s art studios. Dipper took all the bill art down because he pays attention to warnings written in blood. 

Im swapping all ages here, so Dipper is good friends with Pacifica and Wendy. Gideon is ... a threat. Lee, Nate and Thompson are still in town. Tambry and Robbie are not. 

Soos is 8, Fiddleford is 13, Stan and Ford are 12. Etc. 

Because of how we’re swapping this, some people’s parents might have to become their children. I’m not a fan of that, but we’ll see. Filbrick Pines was the youngest sibling of Mabel and (Mason) Dipper. He’s not well liked by the family. And he doesn’t like his own family all that much, hence the distance between them. He likes his kids even less, though, so Gravity Falls they go! I hate that guy. 

Ma Pines may or may not come with them? Hmm.

[todaytomorrowgiraff]

hello! i was scrolling thru the frenrey tag and i saw ur post abt frenrey fics and read thru some comments and i just wanted to try to clear this up bc like it could be bad? someone replied w a threat abt if ppl wrote frenrey as predatory they'd kill them, and while yeah joke threatening is rlly fucking awful especially towards ppl u don't kno, i just wanted to ask why like instead of going a bit more into it u just left the possibility that writing mlm relationships as predatory wasn't an actual issue and was just something "uncomfortable?" it's definitely uncomfortable, it's been a real issue w ppl who rn't mlm writing or making that a common trope. it's been damaging to their community. of course addressing that you don't want threats on your posts is a good thing and boundaries are good to set, i don't blame you for telling them to leave you alone about that, i just got a generally bad vibe from the rest of the reply. sorry, this was a long thing to read and i hope it doesn't mess up your day too horribly.

Ok, so I didn’t answer the person because I make a point of only debating with people who actually tries to debate with me. Why would I answer a person who only wanted their opinion heard and threatened people in the process? I’m too old for that shit. You on the other hand pose a valid question and I feel like this can be a good learning opportunity for you younger people on tumblr. 

I want to start out with that I’m saying this as a queer person who has read fanfics and been in fandoms for 20 years. And as a person who’s job it is to teach about literature and story telling structures. I’ve studied this shit.

So lets talk tropes. Most of you already know why certain tropes are harmful for certain groups. In the case of the predatory gay it’s harmful when used in main stream media because it helps paint the picture of gay and queer people as dangerous and predatory. 

So why is it different when the same tropes are used in fan fiction? Shouldn’t that also be bad? Not necessarily. Now the big difference here is context. This is something I feel lot of people who only learn about these kinds of things in online settings fail to see. When it comes to tropes in storytelling context is everything. Lets look at the context of HLVRAI fan fiction. It is written by singular people for free, not giant companies making money of stereotypes. It’s written in a community that is largely made up of queer people (honestly I’ve yet to find a cis het person in any of the servers I’m in XD). Lastly frenrey is a queer relationship which means all the fanfics written with this ship has queer representation. 

Now as you see, the context here (independent writer who writes for free in a community largely made up of queer people with only queer representation) is very different from when the same trope is featured in main stream media (Big companies making money and reaching a diverse audience and often featuring very little queer representation). The trope in the fanfic setting will not harm in the same way it would in the main stream setting. It won't teach people that queer people are predatory because the people reading it are either queer themselves or have seen enough different representations on other fanfics to know this is not the case. Therefor the trope in this context is at worse upsetting or uncomfortable for someone reading it. Which is why tags exists. 

You also have to take into consideration that fan fic writers don’t create these character, they interpret them from the source material. Benrey in the show is acting kinda predatory at times. He flirts kind of aggressively with Gordon who clearly shows it makes him uncomfortable. Now does this make HLVRAI bad because they use this trope? No, again we have to see to the context. This is a friend group (which contains several queer people) who improvises a story on the fly. The way they act is how they usually act and joke with each other. 

So if people chooses to use this aspect of Benrey’s character in their writing they’re also not just making up a predatory gay character from scratch, they’re interpreting the source material. 

I hope this little rant might help to widen the perspective for some folks of tropes in media. Just because a trope is bad in one context, doesn’t mean it is in another. You have to see the wider picture in this, it’s not a black or white issue. 

TLDR: When we consume any type of media we always have to be aware of in what context it has been made and how we consume it. Trope that are harmful in main stream media does not necessarily have to have the same harmful impact when written in fan fiction. 

[fmdjoosungarchive]

hi hello again for anyone who might not kno i’m demi (24, she/they, pst, discord demi#6468) and i’m treating the revamp like an au so i’m gonna explain my kids like no one has ever met them before. they were due for intro refreshes anyway! so if you’d like to plot, hit me up or like this. i’m easiest to catch on tumblr ims on sung’s blog, or on discord. as for sung, i’ve updated his pages to the best of my ability atm, so you can read more at his bio, profile, claims, wiki, timeline(wip), or plots. otherwise, i’ll leave a tldr under the cut!

choi joosung (stage name sun, preference to be called joosung or sung) was born in 1995 in gwangju

he’s leader, main dancer, lead rapper, and vocal of quantum

the road to getting to that point was a bit messy tho bc u see,,, he was scouted for his looks at 14, n trained under gold star from 2009 to 2014

then he got a hip injury and they dropped him

he went back home all sad n his parents (restaurant chain owners) were like okay time to take ur role as the future ceo! and sung was like no < 3

and he ran off to the military, which he also hated, but he was good at it

he hoped it would make his parents happy enough they wouldnt be too mad when he finished that he auditioned for more companies

got into dimensions n it was basc Straight into debut prep

but oops now he’s leader too, to a bunch of strangers

sung really desperately wanted his debut to go well tho, so he put a fuckton of effort into getting closer w them

and he’s not rly someone who gives up, so he was determined to be good for them and also better himself as much as he could

he really loves quantum’s concept marketing and wants to become even more involved in them

his image mixes sex appeal/visuals with his dance ability, and a kind “good boy” personality

as a solo personality, his focus has mostly on modelling, songwriting, and hosting

he has a night radio show called “sun’s goodnight” that’s almost three years old. he’s written for quantum, his own solo music, and the solo music of others. and he does modelling stuff just,, all the time. and he hates being bagged down to just his looks but it’s difficult to not wanna use his face when he looks like that 2bh :/

non career stuff

sung’s personality is generally quite sunshine n cheery

when he gets the Big Sads he usually deals with it on his own, but usually he’s not afraid to cry in front of others (& he cries a fuckton. happy, sad, angry, whatever)

anger to him is usually short lived and just a lot of pouting and brow furrowing. takes something big for it to last longer

he can also be kinda judgmental when it comes to other people who don’t follow his values, like smoking, sleeping around, being dickish. however, he’s also wishy washy on this bc he’ll make excuses for some people more than others. lil hypocrite ass

he’s also a homiesexual n has a hard time accepting that. he’s got a complicated past with trying to tell his family about his current (and only) boyfriend so it doesn’t make it easier

he loves dancing and singing and reading books and composing songs and being an idol fan (candy’s still his fave group he still has a candy blanket)

as a child his family wasn’t well off, they only became rich over time thru the fam business, v new money of them, so when he was younger he’d read books from the library to pass the time bc it was free. and it stuck

he’s been trying to become a better cook lately bc he loves the househusband fantasy but he’s shite. he’s enlisted the help of his mom, grandmother, sister-in-law, and mav. a whole ass team

he has a stuffed animal and blanket collection. luvs sweaters

luvs giving gifts to treasured people

an extremely loyal friend. he’s basically a dog

[bladekindeyewear]

HS^2 bloggin’ mainline 2020-12-25

I’m not going to spend time BLOGGING an upd8 on Christmas morning!

...yes I am who the fuck am I kidding.  (Bonus stuff and Hiveswap are still well on hold though.)

So are we gonna follow up on the main ship?  Probably not, right, with that perfect Karkat point to cut away, right?  We’re just going to leave Roxy’s question hanging, as well as makeouts etiquette, and leave while having seen a COUPLE FRAMES of non-possessed canon Jade with only whatever fun fanart was inspired across the internet by the moment to tide us over????

Yeah, probably.

Ugh, more Dirk.  I guess it’s overdue.  :(

> CHAPTER 16. Welcome to my Secret Lair

Oh huh, I guess not?  So... Jane’s, or Rose and Kanaya’s?

Karkat stays for longer than John thought he would. They talk a bit, but mostly they are quiet. Eventually, Karkat gets called away on yet more important war business, leaving John with one final touch on the shoulder. John leans into it in response, though he’s a bit ashamed of chasing down a sliver of physical affection so soon after obliterating Karkat’s evening like he had.

Pretty much, yeah.  Can’t blame either of them.

When Karkat is finally gone, John still doesn’t move. It isn’t as though he has nowhere else to go, since there are quite a few places he might attempt to make himself useful, for better or for worse.

You’re still abandoning the task that was explicitly yours to protect your literal kid and his friends, but, oh well.  Low-point.  Dave dead, house dead, broke news, I get it.

He just doesn’t feel ready for that yet. The remnants of his house are still smoldering, and he can’t stop staring at them. It would make sense, he thinks, to want to root around through the rubble for anything that’s still intact; some half-charred keepsake to claim as the last thing left that’s still his. But he doesn’t want to do it, and he doesn’t want to think about it. And he still can’t move.

Can’t move.  No Breath huh?  What’s going to get him to, then?

> (==>)

Oh boy, that might help.  XD  She’s pretty good at that.

> (==>)

Still with the waistline gap.  And was his phone always yellow like his God-Tier shoes?

ROXY: hey john can u do me a quick solid ROXY: actly idk how quick itll be but its definitely solid ROXY: harry anderson says i just missed u being here but could u skip back on over?

Nice, huh!  No judgment, just a hey-any-chance-you-could-swing-back.  He sort of needs to be needed right now, in a simple, almost everyday non-judgmental way I guess.  (That’s what he NEEDED anyway-- whether he deserved it though is up for debate.)

ROXY: i need help w/smth and yr darling boy is holed up in his room working on some fuckin craft project or other and cant be bothered

YES SEW JOHN A BETTER FITTING FUCKING OUTFIT

ROXY: and now that me and u are freshly on speakin terms again i might as well take advantage of that olive branch and put u to work ROXY: assumin you havent died in an air raid, that is ROXY: which id also be interested in knowin about so if u wld be so kind as to reply instead of leavin me hangin

Heheheh.  Gosh Roxy is always the best.

JOHN: yea yea sorry im here. JOHN: i just had a hard time getting my phone out of these fucking tiny pants.

Hah.

JOHN: and also my house is bombed out so i'm kinda grappling with that. JOHN: but i honestly am not sure how much longer i need to sit around staring at it. trying to align my memories of my youth with whatever is happening right now so JOHN: short version is no i’m not dead, and yeah i can come back over there and help you out. ROXY: oh sweet yr alive and down to do manual labor its a win/win JOHN: see you soon.

Yep!  Pulled away from all the metaphorical, ultra-meaningful bullshit, back to some brass tacks with some easy humor.  Definitely something Roxy can do well.~

> (==>)

EXCUSE ME.  What is that outfit and pose.  Did you--

ROXY: sup ROXY: follow me ROXY: well were just going to my room so i guess technically u know the way JOHN: haha ok.

Did you invite him over for the manual labor of banging you while your son is sewing in the other room

Or maybe the labor is making him a new sibling.  JFC

Is this plan part of why we got the sudden content warning that was mocked or was that mainly for Hiveswap 

John follows, trying to shake the ominous feeling he got from what she’d just said. He’d been in and out of this house a lot in the past few days. Why should this be any different?

I DUNNO JOHN DOES THIS SEEM DIFFERENT TO YOU

> (==>)

Yea this seems like a fucc room.

JOHN: it’s not like i could forget! ROXY: ya i guess u only really saw the living room when you were here the other day but i have changed some stuff up ROXY: done a lil redecoratin here n there

So it’s MORE of a fucc room than previously >__>”

ROXY: may have to do a smidge more if my old bff decides im next on the list for bombing out ROXY: but so far so good

Ah geez.

ROXY: just a coupla exploded cars in the yard from some shenanigans our dear son and his friends were in but u kno it is what it is!!!

Well, that’ll buff out easy.

ROXY: can i get u anything? ROXY: just made some coffee JOHN: no, uh, i’m good.

Of course she has a fancy handled winecoffeeglass  (and the handle does look ridiculous but it’d be too hot to hold otherwise)

Roxy shrugs and swirls her own coffee around in her novelty mug. John looks around. A lot about the room is the same. The family photos, the rug. There’s a lot more cat stuff in there now, though. The bed is new. John feels like he’s about to take a test he hasn’t studied for. He makes himself focus on what she’s saying.

That would be the feeling.

> (==>)

MY GOD.  Roxy is so fucking good at this holy shit

She KNOWS she’s making him squirm and she loves it

JOHN: so uh anyway. JOHN: what was this favor? ROXY: yo why dont u just come rest yr tush for a bit ROXY: take a lil relax next 2 me here JOHN: haha uh. JOHN: roxy i uh. JOHN: im flattered, but i don’t know if that’s really the right step right now. JOHN: don’t get me wrong, everything seems so fucked up right now that when i try to think about what might actually BE the right step, it feels like a huge cartoon question mark might physically manifest over my head. JOHN: but I’m not sure if um rekindling our physical relationship is really the best--

So is Roxy trolling him, about to reveal she wasn’t thinking of sex and was just making things seem sultry?  Or just had “lol jk” as an option-select, maybe.

> (==>)

ROXY: r u kiddin me rn egbert JOHN: i’m not? unless you were, in which case yeah lets say i was also kidding. JOHN: oh my god, i’m sorry, i don’t know why this making me freak out.

OH NOOO NOT THE DISDAAAAIN - CRITICAL HIT D:

ROXY: i remember our past boot knockin with fondness but that is a situation im not interested in revisiting

boot knockin XD

ROXY: look john ROXY: i was trying to be polite about it ROXY: offering u sustenance n rest n all ROXY: but you look like shit ROXY: i just wanted to catch up on the whole heinous war situation were in and maybe check in on e/o before leaping strait to the real n actual nonsexual manual labor favor i have in mind for u JOHN: oh.

Hey, she can’t help looking sexy she’s too good at it.

Is the manual labor moving the crashed cars?  Can’t Roxy pull that off on her own, or... banish the cars to the void or something?  (Oh, but WOULD she want to do it on her own when she can rope in John and bring him down to earth by giving him a useful task?  And admittedly his strength and wallet would make things easier.)

John feels his shoulders unbunch. Of course. Yeah. He’s almost embarrassed by how relieved he feels. So what if his ex wife wanted to hook up? Shouldn’t that be a situation he could navigate? Don’t people like to find solace in human physical connection during dire times? Why did the idea of it make his mind white out in panic more than, say, any number of the traumas he just experienced?

Probably some gender stuff mixed up in there too, June.

He doesn’t know, but he believes Roxy that he must look pretty haggard. He probably feels haggard? Maybe sitting down will feel better.

Just put your feet up yeah

> (==>)

WHAT A CUTE IMAGE

JOHN: sorry. like i said, my "how to react to stuff" meter is completely fucked right now. ROXY: thats fair bud

she’s used to being patient with you don’t worry otherwise you never would’ve gotten this far

ROXY: real fast i do need to do a quick takeback of all that shit i said last time we talked about janey not being literally the most evil person we knew or whatever ROXY: i guess i was hopped up on arguin or somethin since that was before we hit our conversational vibe bc of course u were right and i shoulda listened

Ouch.  Yeah, we saw just lately just how far off the deep end she was.  (Where was that funny upd8 reaction art summarizing the bit where Kanaya was holding Tavros hostage and Jane was transparently debating “hmm do I let my son die?” and Kanaya and Tavros were just looking at each-other flat-mouthed nervous?  I REALLY wanted to share that but I don’t usually want to reblog or put most stuff HS^2 not under a read-more, for spoiler purposes, usually.)

ROXY: im just glad ur ok ROXY: or like alive JOHN: yeah, jury's still out on "ok" but, you know. ROXY: ya ROXY: u said ur house is gone?? JOHN: yep. JOHN: completely. ROXY: jeez ROXY: i would ask how ur feelin but like the answer 2 that has got 2b "prtty bad"

Talk it ouuuut~~  get those feels out there and articulated john

JOHN: yeah. JOHN: i mean. JOHN: no? JOHN: it’s weird. JOHN: it feels like it should be a bigger deal, I guess? JOHN: like it’s my HOUSE. JOHN: but mostly it always felt like my dad’s house? JOHN: and when i started living there after i moved out of here, it was like i crammed myself back into whatever was left of my kid self? JOHN: and it didn’t feel good, but it at least was familiar, you know? JOHN: like living there let me feel closer to my dad, trying to be like the way i remember him, or like how i remember him wanting me to be, or something? JOHN: and i didn’t realize how much i hated doing that until i saw it all go up in flames. JOHN: so i guess i could have used my powers to stop the fire and save whatever was left of the place, but i couldn’t bring myself to do it. JOHN: like some fucked up part of me was glad i got there too late? JOHN: so i just sat there, watching, trying to figure out why watching my house burn down felt like i was being released from prison. JOHN: and even now i keep trying to explain it away, as though it’s because of how fucked up everything else is that it made me feel good. JOHN: but that’s just bullshit. JOHN: it DID feel good. JOHN: i DO feel free. JOHN: sorry.

I was kind of saying some Breath/Blood stuff at the time of him losing his last tie to his stubborn sticking-to-his-kid-self bit?  Except now we’re mixing it in with June Egbert and his gender-identity questions too.

ROXY: no need 2 apologize ROXY: we just delved in2 my whole gender thing last time so it seems fine for u to have a turn JOHN: i didn’t say it was a gender thing.

Oh shit

ROXY: well no i just meant like i did some sharing ROXY: like referrin 2 the topic i brought up when we chatted last ROXY: but like now that u mention it ROXY: *meaningful pause* JOHN: … JOHN: i JOHN: ROXY: lol well we can move on 2 the favor part if youd rather ROXY: stick a lil pin in that topic n come back 2 it when u have had sleep

Are you just INCREDIBLY incisive Roxy or have you and John talked about this before?

ROXY: like i said the other day its not like this shits figureoutable in 1 sitting anyways JOHN: yeah... ROXY: sooooooo ROXY: movin on

It’s just fine for Roxy to slow-roll this yeah, if she’s going to pry open that door a little

ROXY: dont be mad but theres a part of the house u didnt know abt the whole time u lived here JOHN: what? ROXY: yea ROXY: i got a secret lair ROXY: for my sciences

OH FUCK YES SCIENCE LAB, of COURSE Roxy would want a cool science lab basement because she always wants a cool science lab basement

ROXY: and i get to it via a transportalizer underneath our bed ROXY: which is 2 heavy 2 move by my lonesome so i just needed to borrow some o your aforementioned powers of wind

Okay no.  Wait.  What the fuck?

First of all, as funny and MSPaintAdventures-y as furniture being in the way of things is, why would you block it with a bed too heavy to move, but,

Second of all, more importantly, how is a GOD-TIER ROXY not strong enough to lift a heavy bed?!?!?!?  Either she’s lying to get John involved in things or this is a gendered cop-out because these characters are superheroes at the TOP of their echeladders, given obnoxiously powerful video-game strength and athletics only to then have ascended into DEITIES.  God-Tier Roxy could probably have lifted a bed like that when she was SEVENTEEN!  And now she’s an ADULT, out-of-shape or otherwise!  If this were a whole CAR I might be willing to handwave it, but just a heavy BED?!?  And none of the GUYS are going to have this much trouble lifting a bed like this, are they??  This just feels like following classic cartoony gender tropes in the complete absence of these characters’ super powers, what the fuck, and also Roxy if you didn’t make it Transportalizer-only access you could have given it an entrance you could phase through with your fancy powers to get to.  FUCK.

This feels stupid.

ROXY: so if u dont mind woosh away JOHN: uh ok, well... JOHN: a secret science lair, sure, i can deal with that. JOHN: why not! JOHN: it doesn’t work out great when i do the windy thing indoors, though. ROXY: aight then no wind bending just use your mangrit

Roxy flexes, the corner of her mouth pulled up into a familiar grin. John feels his guts, so recently calmed, twist up into knots again. Her eyebrows shoot up and the smile loosens. He must have shown something on his face.

You’re already THIS sensitive about gendertalk?

ROXY: ok or just like push when i push ROXY: we both got sick muscles ROXY: no other adjectives necessary JOHN: yeah ok. ROXY: on 3?

Please, please reinforce the idea that they both have sick strength, because they fucking do and the idea that Roxy actually a hundred percent NEEDED John to do this is BS.

> (==>)

JOHN: holy shit? ROXY: sorry to lop yet another huge scoop onto ur lil brains ice cream revelation sundae JOHN: so wait, if this thing's always been under the bed, how’d you get down here before without me? ROXY: well thats neither here nor there john JOHN: i mean it is kinda. Here. ROXY: fine ok checkmate ROXY: i dont ACTUALLY need ur nerdgrit for this escapade ROXY: like im sorry but i said it ROXY: i mostly just wanted to see you and show u wats down here

THANK FUCKING CHRIST.

If that wasn’t actually just a lie to get him involved I was going to stay SO mad.  Of COURSE Roxy can move a fucking BED no matter how heavy it is.  OF COURSE.

ROXY: and also uve been ~sent for~ JOHN: ok but like ROXY: john i am inviting u 2 my inner sanctum ROXY: i am literally bringing out the word "sanctum" in case u werent already clued in 2 how cool this is ROXY: so do u wanna go into my secret lair or wat JOHN: yeah!? JOHN: yes? i guess? ROXY: aight good

Yes John of course you want to stop fighting it

ROXY: then as they told me in the hospital before lil h a was born ROXY: just push

eyeroll, but yeah, of course

> (==>)

Oh cool, sprite form version of her loungewear.

> (==>)

Sorry for my compulsion to post every full-frame image of Roxy in this awesome outfi-WERE YOU KEEPING CALLIOPE UNDER YOUR BED THIS WHOLE TIME?!?????

That’s like... almost a fucking metaphor isn’t it????  For the relationship you preferred in the other timeline and possibly THIS one TOO or

ROXY: hey callieee i got him ROXY: o damn john sorry i shoulda also told u callies here weve been hangin out again ROXY: 1 more freak for ur bean

Oh huh, so this isn’t an always thing.  And these two can get close in more than one timeline where it would’ve worked out nicely.  :)

JOHN: oh it's ok, my bean feels pretty well adjusted to freakage at this point so keep them coming if you like! ROXY: k cool i will JOHN: do i get to know what that big thing under the sheet is? ROXY: hmmmmmm no JOHN: oh ok. JOHN: are you sure? i mean, it seems like a pretty prominent feature of the room. JOHN: space. JOHN: wherever we are. ROXY: and a totally mysterious n COMPLETELY inconspicuous feature it will have to remain for now ROXY: we r kinda in a hurry here fyi ROXY: and by that i mean ROXY: we are in precisely the amount of hurry that means im excused from having to a that specific q rn JOHN: right, sorry. JOHN: i will pay no attention to the object behind the curtain. ROXY: u catch on fast egbert ROXY: anyway theres more cool info coming so just follow me

I don’t have any big theories.  Is it just the Hiveswap device or something?  If Calliope helped with it it’d help explain the Cherubic theme.

> (==>)

JOHN: so... this is all downstairs? JOHN: it seems like you had a lot of work done. ROXY: well no not x actly ROXY: were in the old meteor JOHN: under the house??? ROXY: ok so ROXY: in hindsight it may have been a bit misleading 2 say like ROXY: "downstairs" ROXY: in reference to a place which is hells of buried underground and may not actually be literally under the house ROXY: but there is no time to explain all that rn john so instead im going to refer u to my adorable little green friend here CALLIOPE: #U_U# ROXY: (hehe) CALLIOPE: *AHEM* CALLIOPE: hi john! CALLIOPE: long time no see. ^u^

Cherubs just really like dark cavelike places full of weird tech don’t they.

> (==>)

THEY’RE SO CUTE

JOHN: oh, uh. hey callie! JOHN: it sure has been a while huh. JOHN: now that i think about it, the last time the three of us hung out like this... CALLIOPE: was when i was aggressively third wheeling yoUr prenUptial coUrtship? CALLIOPE: if yoU dont mind, john, i'd rather not rehash that period of oUr lives. CALLIOPE: it was more than a little painfUl for me. JOHN: oh. JOHN: god, jeez, i'm sorry. i didn't mean to-- CALLIOPE: hee hee john i am only pUlling yoUr leg, don't worry. CALLIOPE: if anything i was personally a little thrilled with how things shook oUt in that respect. CALLIOPE: imagine, if yoU will, a yoUng cherUb raised in solitUde, whose only solace was the convolUted and tUmUltUoUs romantic schemata she projected onto her only friends from another Universe. CALLIOPE: and then fUrther imagine that this yoUng cherUb, throUgh varioUs even *more* convolUted contrivances, ended Up in the company of those selfsafe friends as an eqUal participant in their sphere of social discoUrse! CALLIOPE: it is a joy the like of which yoU possibly cannot fathom. u_u

Reinforcing that things turning out this way was in fact the FANTASY that Calliope was writing over in the Canon timeline.  Just, heavily, HEAVILY implied that the Candy timeline is -- or at least originated as -- Calliope’s fanfiction as a Muse of Space, and its competition for audience interest with canon is the essential conflict between alt!Calliope and Dirk (or Dirk and Andrew Hussie).

CALLIOPE: so to pUt it simply, getting to experience sUch emotional drama myself was an impossibly enriching experience. CALLIOPE: possibly a first for my species! CALLIOPE: it's actUally qUite interesting, if yoU ROXY: *nudge* CALLIOPE: oh, right. yes. i'm getting a little carried away, haha. CALLIOPE: argh, i'm sorry, this is not how i planned to begin this vital conversation.

Vital conversation?  What sorta truth-bombs are coming?

CALLIOPE: but to sUmmarise, what i was trying to say is: CALLIOPE: don't beat yourself Up aboUt it john. CALLIOPE: besides, hUman divorces are even more fascinating than i had ever imagined, and being able to witness yoUrs in motion was an honoUr. CALLIOPE: so i consider Us aboUt even at this point. JOHN: hahaha!!! JOHN: okay, well that's good to know! CALLIOPE: ^u^

Holy SHIT that was savage!  And we’ll NEVER know whether or not she really intended it so savagely, either.~

JOHN: so um... JOHN: i hear that there's this big secret thing you wanna tell me about? CALLIOPE: oh right, yes of course! CALLIOPE: let me jUst say first of all how thrilled i am that yoU're on board. CALLIOPE: i wasn't sUre if yoUr natUral inclinations woUld have preclUded yoUr coming to such a place as this, and yet here yoU are. CALLIOPE: this whole endeavoUr will be *so* mUch easier with yoUr help.

Uh oh.

Hopefully babies aren’t involved.

JOHN: oh! well, shucks. JOHN: not really sure what that means but i'm just glad to be of use somewhere, haha. JOHN: which, speaking of somewhere, CALLIOPE: ah right, right. yoU're probably a little cUrioUs as to where the dickens we are. CALLIOPE: how much do yoU know aboUt black holes? JOHN: um... like, the big space things? CALLIOPE: they aren't always big actUally, and in fact their relative smallness is practically their defining qUality. JOHN: oh. CALLIOPE: bUt okay i think we are on the same page. CALLIOPE: so, what if i told yoU that we are inside of a black hole right now.

Oh dear, we’re getting into the canon/noncanon divide?

JOHN: um... JOHN: like, HERE? JOHN: we just transportalized into a black hole? CALLIOPE: no, i mean, what if oUr whole WORLD was inside a black hole. JOHN: ok.

Yeah, that’s gonna be John’s reaction.  “ok.”  Pretty much inevitable.

CALLIOPE: earth c, or at least oUr version of it, has, from the moment we crossed the victory threshold, been inside a black hole. JOHN: ok. CALLIOPE: and not just any black hole, bUt the very black hole in which the green sUn Ultimately met its demise, allowing oUr victory in the first instance! JOHN: huh! ROXY: ("huh!") ROXY: (rofl my fucking ao egbert) JOHN: (shhhh!)

And Roxy enjoys his non-reaction reactions as much as we do, hehe.

CALLIOPE: bUt, paradoxically, the critical moment which determined its capture within the black hole happened *after* that point. CALLIOPE: i refer of coUrse to yoUr decision not to retUrn to the mediUm and fight my brother. JOHN: wait, wait. JOHN: you mean, the meat and candy thing? JOHN: oh my god. JOHN: you mean i actually DID make a mistake that day. CALLIOPE: well, that's not exactly what that-- JOHN: ugh, i fucking KNEW it! JOHN: i'm so sorry. JOHN: i'm so sorry that i put the earth inside a black hole everyone. ): ROXY: john ROXY: listen ROXY: u have got to get out of this mindset i am begging you JOHN: ):

Yeah shake him out of this shit.

ROXY: your choice literally didnt matter ROXY: the whole thing was symbolic in the first place ROXY: literally symbolic in the case of the picnic i mean come on ROXY: it was just some steak and a plate of candy suckers JOHN: oh. CALLIOPE: i mean, i wouldn't go so far as to say that the meal we shared was unimportant, given the sacred significance of the two options i presented. CALLIOPE: but yes, yoUr choice of snack was infinitely less important than the choice which it presaged. CALLIOPE: and even then, calling it a choice woUld be sorely misleading. CALLIOPE: think of it like a coin flip. CALLIOPE: the series of events that led to Us being trapped beyond the event horizon of an Ubermassive black hole could be considered "tails", while the events which would have occUrred otherwise could be considered "heads". CALLIOPE: since both were possible, and paradox space is the way it is, they actUally both happened. and we jUst "happened" (hee hee) to get tails instead of heads. JOHN: you mean we ended up with the bad possibility. CALLIOPE: not at all! since both possibilities depend on one another's existence, it really doesn't make sense to call them "right" or "wrong". they both just "are". JOHN: o...kay... CALLIOPE: u_u

Yeah, it’s going to take a bit more than that to convince him he didn’t make the “wrong decision”.

CALLIOPE: i realise that this may be a lot to process. CALLIOPE: it's easy to forget that this wasn't obvioUs to everyone from the beginning. CALLIOPE: anyway, the reason i went on this tangent in the first place was to explain that the space we are standing in right now has a special significance, in that it is the location which corresponds to the black hole's singUlarity. JOHN: oh, wow. JOHN: um. JOHN: ok so, sorry if this is a dumb question to ask suddenly, but what does being inside of a black hole actually... mean for us? JOHN: is that bad? JOHN: is it like in movie, um, JOHN: shoot. JOHN: roxy what was that matthew mcconaughey movie from your earth that we watched? ROXY: u mean interstellar JOHN: RIGHT. JOHN: the one with the organ. JOHN: man. i cried at that movie so much. ROXY: lol u can say that again ROXY: iirc at least part of y u got so weepy was the fact that u couldnt believe a version of earth existed where ppl got 2 watch more mcconaughey films than you JOHN: listen. JOHN: i simply don't think you all appreciated the gift you were given. CALLIOPE: i don't believe i'm familiar with this particular film ^u^;; ROXY: oh dont worry cal you didnt miss much JOHN: (gasp)

This is all gold

ROXY: but the important point is that no its not really an interstellar type situation here egbert ROXY: ur not gonna enter a weird time vortex and change the trajectory of a little girls life with the power of love JOHN: aw.

Dammit, now we have to be on the lookout for that possibility.  Or it did sort of already happen more than once to John.  ...Whatever.

CALLIOPE: to go back to your original question, john. CALLIOPE: it's not strictly speaking "bad" for Us to be inside of a black hole, mUch thoUgh that contradicts most of what anyone knows about them. CALLIOPE: of coUrse, if we had fallen into it, that woUld be a whole other kettle of fish. CALLIOPE: the tidal forces woUld have stretched Us all into spaghetti and then ripped us apart! CALLIOPE: bUt the natUre of oUr arrival was more akin to simply "being" here, sUddenly. one moment we were not, and the next moment we were, and somehow always had been. CALLIOPE: in everyday, practical terms, being inside of a black hole has very little bearing on Us. CALLIOPE: i mean, the natUre of space and time is a little finicky in here, bUt for the most part it doesn't seem to be anything too oUt of the ordinary. CALLIOPE: bUt beyond that, it means that we are sealed away from the rest of existence. CALLIOPE: oUr sphere of inflUence is limited to the sphere of the black hole's bounding horizon. CALLIOPE: as far as everyone else is concerned, we might as well not even exist! JOHN: is there no way we could let anyone know that we're in here...? CALLIOPE: almost certainly not!

No?  So this doesn’t have to do with the divide?

CALLIOPE: there are very few ways for anything to escape the kind of predicament that we are in right now. one of them is to be an all-powerfUl being with control over the very fabric of space, with the energy of two Universes at yoUr disposal. CALLIOPE: in which case, escape woUld become rather trivial, if a little Unscientific. JOHN: ok. i am going to assume that we can't just do that. CALLIOPE: yoU've hit the nail on the head, UnfortUnately. U_U CALLIOPE: the method i described was the one employed by my alternate self, who yoU may recall crashed through the event horizon in the body that once belonged to jade harley. CALLIOPE: she departed through a pUnctUre she created in the black hole's surface shortly after consUming my brother, a deed which provided her with the necessary "oomph", and which was frankly rather breathtaking to watch. =u= CALLIOPE: bUt Upon her departUre, the rift closed for good. as far as i can see, there's simply no way for Us to commUnicate with the world oUtside the black hole.

What the heck?  Calliope SAW all this?  Is this her Muse powers at work, letting her observe these things, or was she there?  And John certainly did NOT see ANY of what Calliope just said happen.

CALLIOPE: i woUld certainly be very sUrprised to find oUt that anyone had managed sUch a thing!

So we’re going to find that out if we haven’t already.  Maybe something to do with the way Vrissy just conks out narcoleptically?

JOHN: ...right. JOHN: so... let me just get this straight. JOHN: knowing that we're inside of a black hole... does that actually change anything? JOHN: like, can't we just go on living like normal? CALLIOPE: oh absolUtely not. CALLIOPE: i don't know if yoU've noticed john bUt this world is on the brink of a total cataclysm. JOHN: oh.

Um, what?

CALLIOPE: oUr exclUsion from the overarching coUrse of events which governs all reality means that oUr existence here is liable to dramatic and violent Upheaval. CALLIOPE: to pUt it another way, becaUse nothing in here "matters", we are likely to be sUbjected to things which are a bit bats in the belfry, for no reason other than it's totally insignificant to the wider canon of reality. CALLIOPE: and mUch thoUgh i am personally titillated by some of the conseqUences of this predicament, it is a degrading way for Us to live. u_u JOHN: that's... certainly one way to put it, yeah...

No plot-armor for your entire timeline, I guess, yep.  Outside of canon, we can imagine and write about ANYTHING happening to the characters, or just drop their existence entirely, much like a doomed offshoot timeline.  It’s a plot stability that depended heavily on the threat of Lord English and being trapped in a story, and without it things are bound to see a BIT chaotic (or “degrading” if you view it as subjected to the whims of fanfic writers, certainly).

CALLIOPE: at first, i believed that this was simply necessary. Us playing tails to oUr coUnterparts' heads, the black to their white, and so forth. CALLIOPE: bUt over the years i have come to the conclUsion that this is simply not kosher. ROXY: its total bs is what it is CALLIOPE: right, yes. CALLIOPE: a steaming pile of bUllshite. CALLIOPE: and so we have decided that something needs to be done aboUt it.

Ah fuck.  You’re going to regulate non-canon?  “Canonize” it?  Is the fact that you eventually succeed at whatever it is you’re trying to do part of why we have the story presented to us in this bifurcated structure?

ROXY: this is finally where u come in jegbert ROXY: we gots quests for yous CALLIOPE: hee hee, yes. CALLIOPE: or *a* quest, to be specific. JOHN: oh boy! ROXY: (this fkin nerd i s2g)

Roxy and Calliope setting him on this quest as a Rogue of Void and a Muse of Space feels fitting.

JOHN: i'm not sure how i can go about freeing us from a hellish space prison, but i'm up for giving it a try i guess? JOHN: i have... literally nothing better to be doing at this point. except for maybe hanging out with harry anderson. ROXY: nice save lol

YEAH WE’RE STILL GLOSSING OVER HOW YOU LEFT HIM UNPROTECTED, JERK

ROXY: but u dont need to worry abt busting us outta space jail tbh ROXY: thats not ur problem to fix JOHN: oh. JOHN: i'm... not sure i follow, then. ROXY: i mean yeah ur gonna obvs facilitate it in a sense ROXY: but only by going and busting the person who can actually help us outta normal earth jail CALLIOPE: we need yoU to free vriska from the clUtches of oUr misgUided friend jane, and bring her here, to the singUlarity. ROXY: weve been calling it the plot point CALLIOPE: yes, the plot point is a key part of oUr plan. CALLIOPE: as far as we have been able to sUrmise, the only remaining method for escaping oUr grim confinement depends on leveraging the UniqUe properties of this location to create an event of sUch catalcysmic proportions that it simply cannot be contained within the black hole any more. CALLIOPE: something SO dramatic, so hyper-relevant, that it becomes ontologically impossible for anyone to ignore it. CALLIOPE: for that, we need an individUal of sUfficient narrative cloUt, so to speak. CALLIOPE: and to liberate her, who better than the embodiment of the aspect of freedom itself? CALLIOPE: ... CALLIOPE: phew. okay, i'm finished. CALLIOPE: CALLIOPE: sorry, that took longer than i expected to go throUgh.

..............................

OOooooh, kay.

Whatever this is, it’s going to be really weird and PROBABLY infuriating and/or shippy, and I’m probably not going to like it.  Plus it seems like it’s some sort of inverse belated canonization of some other black-hole-rescue theories I went on about at some point.  Although, related to that link, “aspect of freedom” if anyone wasn’t paying attention!  That’s a (sorta-)canon mention of the purpose of it!

They’re going to attention-wh-- attention-hog themselves out of the black hole so that they’re “considered canon” too, or close enough.  Huh.

ROXY: what r u talking about cals that was great ROXY: i could listen 2 u plotsplain for years CALLIOPE: oh you >u< ROXY: fyi this was why i wanted u to get a move on eggbread ROXY: so callie could have more time 2 infodump ROXY: thats love bitchhhhhh JOHN: hahaha. JOHN: ok, well, i think i understood all that?

Love with who? Callie, John, both?

In reality, John isn’t sure what most of this means. But on balance, it feels okay? He’s gone back and forth about a hundred times in the last week about where his place in everything is, so he might as well ride this out. Plus, the last time a Lalonde kind of told him to do something, he thinks that he chose not to, and look where that got him. And it’s not like he has other plans. He may as well do this! It’s at least going to get him involved in things again, if nothing else. He turns to go, and then hears a sound. It’s the sound of feet and knocking on doors, echoed through stone and digital static.

Oh shit.  Is Andrew trapped behind some fourth walls behind the curtains.

> (==>)

Oh RIGHT also that DEVICE is where they want to bring Vriska.  Are they going to overturn part of canon itself with a super-retcon thus making this timeline unbelievably relevant or--?  Maybe make all the PESTERQUESTS canon or something?!  I don’t know.  Maybe they’re INTENTIONALLY starting the game like Vriska wanted to??????

Guh, this is something so big that I don’t WANT to theorize about it, do I.

JOHN: did you hear that? ROXY: wha ROXY: oh yeah uh ROXY: i may have messaged rose and kan and jade to check on them too ROXY: so its prob onea them showin up ROXY: they don’t need to know bout all this tho ROXY: we got time to chat with them b4 u go get vriska

No, even if it’s a knock at the somehow-top-level-house-even-under-buried-- oh, right, maybe it’s covering in part a monitoring system that looks up there.  But still, part of that sound was DOUBTLESS these two hiding something, all standing in front of the curtain like that.

JOHN: i’ll go stall em. ROXY: thx babe ROXY: oh is it 2 soon for that joke or JOHN: no, weirdly enough, that one’s fine. ROXY: oh good ok see u up there soon!

How is calling your significant other “babe” not cool REGARDLESS of gender?!  Like wasn’t that always cool? --Oh wait is it because they’re not together or... but... guh, I don’t know.

Anyway, see y’all after the holidays at least.