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#might as well make it easy
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Ooof.
It's been about a year now, and I'm still not entirely over my devastating friend breakup.
Like, I guess I AM over it in the sense that I'm pretty much fine. I did my grieving (Read: cried my eyes out on the living room rug, downed a bottle of too expensive wine at a sushibar while sorting through the devastation with Husband and QPP, listened to Miley Cyrus' Wrecking Ball and wallowed in self pity until I got tired of myself, wrote a lot of cruel/angry/miserable/desperate tumblr posts that didn't make it out of my drafts, read The Friendship by Connie Palmen and Take Care Of Yourself by Sophie Calle, found a modicum of peace with the fact that I really felt more humiliated than sad, you know.) and I mostly no longer think about it. It's not really a thing in my life anymore.
....
But holy fuck. I'm NOT over it in the sense that accidentally coming across anything they made is still a recipe for Instant Physical Panic. Like, heart racing, nausea, the works.
It's just...
I can't fucking believe they wrecked me so bad that accidentally seeing their art or their fics or even their bloody username makes my body respond with such instantaneous threat response, almost 9 months later still.
There they are, completely and utterly unaffected, and there am I, having hypertension over seeing their art reblogged on somebody else's blog. It's like the humiliation just won't end.
And whatever can I do about it? Nothing, that's what.
Except this.
One of the reasons I originally gave them the ick was my "bad habit" of publicly processing all my feelings; guess I'm not escaping that allegation. Still. I'm lancing the boils of this grief, one by one. Better out in the open than festering inside.
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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 4 months
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you are so whimsical i qant to check out this mdzs (..??) because of your whimsical nature thank you sorry im very high and your art moved me emotionally
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This is simultaneously the sweetest and funniest thing someone has sent me, thank you.
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equalseleventhirds · 2 months
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things which, while not universally hated, are often treated with disdain by some ttrpg players:
pvp
dungeon crawls
resource tracking
unwinnable fights/situations
metagaming
gm not preparing the adventure details beforehand
things am trying to put in my games
pvp
dungeon crawls
resource tracking
unwinnable fights/situations
metagaming
gm not preparing the adventure details beforehand
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xxplastic-cubexx · 22 days
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so like do you think they made the plastic wheelchair ALONGSIDE the plastic prison as a Just In Case situation, only after they realized charles was going to be a frequent visitor, or both as in because they knew charles was going to be the only person visiting him during planning they decided to make him a chair ahead of time
#xmen#x2: x men united#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#cherik#not really but yes it is#snap chats#secret fourth option is they just had a plastic wheelchair at the mansion just in case this incredibly specific scenario happened jvlkaervj#part of me hopes the staff just Knew cause imagine being THAT divorced publicly but another part hopes erik asked for one. not politely ofc#def joked bout how charles couldnt think to leave him alone for five minutes lest he did something Uncouth somehow ik he did#that charles was going to show up sooner or later so they might as well make it easy for themselves and prep etc etc#girl ima throw up what if charles didnt visit tho .... thats not even a possibility cause ofc he did but still !!!!#personally id throw up and cry like wdym my best friend ex husband didnt show up. when i even asked for a chair for him ..#EVEN ASKED FOR A SILLY LIL PLASTIC CHESS SET alternatively what if charles brought that... im making myself sick#As Indicated By My Username i think of the plastic jail every day its so funny to me and so quaint#i should rewatch X2 just for plastic jail#like it makes sense and i do think its a cute detail but still. gotta put grandpa in the polly pocket prison set now. tragic !!#i remember watching the movie for the first time in recent years and audibly going 'aw' at the plastic wheelchair im so sorry JVLKEJKA#LIKE AWW CMON THATS WEIRDLY CUTE gotta make sure peepaw can visit his ex husband </3 so they can play chess </3#i love that chess is Their Thing ... any time a ship's got mfers who fucks heavy with chess i know im hooked#its not intentional things happen this way but i will still laugh#kk nightly cherik posting is done byebye
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canisalbus · 10 months
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I just recently started following you so i don't have the full lore of your murderous gay religiously traumatized doggos, BUT, from my understanding, they are Italian and i don't know what part of Italy they are from, yet i can't help headcanoning Vasco as Tuscan, while Machete is probably from some part of Veneto. And as an Italian who has heard Tuscans and Veneto dialet, well it's an hilarious mental image.
Vasco is indeed Tuscan, Florentine to be specific. He comes from a wealthy and influential noble family that has lived in Florence for centuries. He's proud of his roots, and it's usually easy for strangers to tell where he's from. He's a resonably successful politician and has worked as an ambassador and representative of Florence on numerous occasions.
Machete is originally Sicilian (ironically about as far from Veneto as possible), although he was taken to mainland at young age and has lived in several places since then, before ending up in Rome. The way I see it, he exhibits very little local color, his demeanor and (even though Italian hadn't become a standardized language yet) way of speaking are formal, neutral and scarcely give away any hints about his personal history, at least in the 16th century canon.
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vaguely-concerned · 1 year
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Thinking about the symbolic weight of smoking in the TLT universe that comes to the fore in The Unwanted Guest -- the way it moves through from person to person: Pyrrha smoked, and Augustine wanted to impress her in all her stone cold fox MILF James Bond glory (and tbf who wouldn't) so he started too. and even though as far as he knows she's been gone for a myriad and is never coming back, he keeps the habit. Ianthe sees something in the hollowed-out Faberge eggshell of Augustine that resonates with her, all that gilded eloquent emptiness and disdain through the ages, so she picked it up from him to try to emulate it. She picked it up so hard that Palamedes -- the exact spiritual antithesis of the 'smoking! on a space station! what a powermove' ennui Ianthe so admired -- spontaneously unnerded enough to even known how to, simply from a sort of contact contamination of the soul.
G1deon and Augustine sharing a jittery smoke after their near-Harrow experience during soup night, and it's the closest thing to any real sense of brotherhood that remains between them. Pyrrha going ten thousand years dying both literally and for a smoke (and then Camilla sold her fucking cigarettes (for a third of what they were worth, probably Pyrrha's own good, and also more importantly grocery money). what an entirely haunted time to be alive etc.). Augustine and Mercy trading a cigarette back and forth in the middle of their collusion over the love and murder of god.
An act of small and measured self-destruction in the name of something a little bit like connection when you're stuck somewhere in yourself where love itself dares not or cannot tread (ritualized, transmissible)..........
#the unwanted guest#the unwanted guest spoilers#the locked tomb#ianthe tridentarius#augustine the first#pyrrha dve#palamedes sextus#this series is going to make me lose my mind completely one day (affectionate)#the locked tomb meta#the fact that ianthe seems to have had some genuine admiration for augustine makes my head spin. of course though.#of course she sees the person who looks the most like he's successfully made himself impervious to the world#utterly untouchable and impossible to hurt because he isn't even really there#and she believes it! even after seeing the john mercy augustine mess at the end! because it's such a seductive idea#when you've stuck yourself in an inevitable ocean of pain to think you could make yourself numb enough that it doesn't matter#it's the emotional equivalent of 'oh there's water all around? well I just won't breathe in then. easy lmao get on my level'#she holds on to that thing from him even when it's been proved to be both impossible and ultimately untrue even in him#because uh. oh I'm about to be kind of sad for ianthe what the fuck is going on. he might actually have been the closest thing#to parental and especially paternal affection she's ever known. certainly known enough to try to model herself after#IMAGINE how fucked up the nine houses must be when augustine the first registers for anyone as a model of psychological survival#ianthe do you really want to be yourself completely so much that you're willing to be nothing. I mean yeah probably but. oh my god#gaining nothing at the cost of everything
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ahollowgrave · 1 month
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Spent more hours than I'd like to admit playing with Renn Cosmetic's Build Your Own Makeup and I think I might make some edits in terms of colors! But for now she's looking pretty fricking cute! Thank you to @thefreelanceangel who showed off her own usage of this kit with Anna!
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puppetmaster13u · 1 year
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Continuing to think about This AU idea and just, slowly rotating it like a microwave.
@phoenixcatch7 had the fun idea of xenomorph-inspiration and the dollhouse being replaced by the Hive instead and I am here for that. A large cave that feels utterly wrong to anyone not part of their colony, if they can even find it. I am thinking something similar to Gemini Home Entertainment if anyone has watched that, with something between plant and flesh growing across the walls. Where one can't tell the difference between the two, or realize that it's already gripping onto them. The caves are already dangerous after all, nevermind the depths that It doesn't let anyone else into.
Also made me think about Jason, and like, so he doesn't die in the cryptid au, and definitely wouldn't in a world where he has a flesh puppet. But that still makes me think about how badly said puppet would be utterly maimed, right? Not to mention the explosion that would burn a lot of it too alongside whatever affect that'd have on his mind and human body. But now I am thinking of how the tunnels are everywhere under Gotham, how the bits of tendrils can reach through that ash, can meld with it, can for a cocoon of sorts. Turning a little robin into something else, letting it evolve into something new.
I am also rotating on if they'd be known to the Justice League like in the Doll au or if only Clark knows about them like in the Genesis au. Tempted for the second if only so there can be fun distinctly Not Human moments. Maybe the Justice League even getting concerned for their friend Superman because there's times he'll whistle or chirp under his breath (he might have picked up a few habits from his friends from Gotham) or literally snap his teeth if he's startled.
But oh the lil robins would probably be so adorable. Very fluffy and downy and brightly colored in a clear warning, but still unsettling. The way they move isn't right, like a jerky contortionist, but can also go too fluid or completely inhumanely still within a heartbeat. Not helped by the fact they don't need to breathe. O h, the batfam could most definitely be venomous. What with how in both Aus they use paralytics and sedatives on their claws and spikes, It could definitely include that within the secondary bodies.
#what's out there au#possessed doll au#y'know what I think I might call this the Meat Marionette Au lol#Meat Marionette Au#Batman Au#Cryptid batman#Cryptid batfam#body horror#rambles#I like to think that if their gifted bodies are damaged too much It takes from their human bodies#Bruce wakes up with a spine of metal partially ripped into his back one day#Jason finds ones of his arms becoming rough & clawed like a bird's-the same one that was obliterated in the other body-#It means there's still stakes for the bodies & that they can't just tank everything#They're lucky that it's been things easy to hide so far but there's always that worry of *what if* in the back of their minds each battle#Thankfully it has to be like permanent damage to effect both of their bodies#like straight up maiming#Smaller injuries just mean horrible migraines or phantom pains depending on the type of wound & the severity#They might struggle with humanity slightly because they forget that normal humans can't make certain noises or hear that well#or that they can't *smell fear*#Gotham is both terrified of and loves the bats#The babies are adorable but the parent is terrifying & can unhinge its jaw and open up its ribs and *yeah*#But that's Gotham for you they suppose#Honestly also pondering Jarro because like his body shape is very different compared to a human lol#I do like to think that they all have bits of black veins across their bodies over their hearts and such#Honestly perhaps Alfred is more mentally effected than the others seeing as he's right on top of the cave all night#I'm just saying he also deserves a second body#Tumblr plz don't eat my tags thank you
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marcobodtlives · 7 months
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Horse Riding Shenanigans
(Glass Door Shenanigans)
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computer-gummy-worm · 2 months
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janky as all hell but hlev is now real
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hephaestuscrew · 9 months
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When Minkowski hugs Eiffel in Ep31 Sécurité, she just grabs hold of him without making a sound, and the listener only knows about the hug because of the "oof" noise Eiffel makes in reacting to having "the wind knocked straight out of him", and the script directions say that Minkowski has "tears silently streaming down her face", and Eiffel is the one who directly acknowledges the hug verbally ("Don't apologise for hugging"). If all we had was Minkowski's side of the interaction, we probably wouldn't know that they hugged. 
When Eiffel hugs Minkowski in Ep54 The Watchtower, he first tells her "C'mere, give us a hug!", and he makes a happy sound of effort as he squeezes her, and Minkowski - under the influence of Pryce's restraining bolt - doesn't seem to have any reaction at all, which Eiffel doesn't appear to notice. Once again, if all we had was Minkowski's side of the interaction, we wouldn't know that they hugged. 
The question of 'in what ways is the hug made audible?' feels much more significant in audio than it would in any another medium, and I do think it reflects something about these characters and their willingness to be open with their affection. Minkowski "grabs him and hugs him" hard enough to knock the wind out of him, but she does so silently. In a somewhat similar but also very different moment of reunion, Eiffel "embraces her" and he's not quiet as he does it. There's something about how Communications Officer Eiffel is always the one who verbalises their physical affection, whether or not he's the one who initiated the hug. The closest Minkowski gets to verbally acknowledging a hug is through an apology; Eiffel is the one who makes the hugs real for the listener.
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I need to work on the neck a bit more, but I cut off the mask's neck piece, stuck another doll head into the mask to be the back of her head (and so I can connect her to the new body), and tried my best to do something with her hair.
I would say I'm more surprised they didn't make more Fiona dolls, considering how popular Shrek was in the 00's, but toy companies seem to think girls hate green and a plus sized doll was a hard sell in the era of "be as as skinny as possible" so.
And nowadays Shrek is considered a meme franchise so I doubt we'll get another official one anytime soon. A shame because this is a genuinely lovely sculpt and face up, and I adore it so much.
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equalseleventhirds · 2 months
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well, i think i've edited it to my satisfaction, and so now here is my official post about it: i've posted a little isekai supplement for (ttrpg of your choice) on itch.io! create a story-within-a-story and play as readers of a Very Cool Book who have suddenly found themselves trapped within that book, in the bodies of characters who they already know are doomed.
the mechanics borrow from trophy dark, and push you to risk walking to your own doom in order to gain the upper hand in your story.
(if you've seen my blog these past few days you've probably seen my drafts of it, but for one (1) dollar you can get it all nicely edited and laid out in a pretty little pdf)
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mitamicah · 8 months
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Update on the JO stickers: now 4 of 7 sketches are done :3 thank you for the suggestions for Nace ^V^
Still not sure what to do for Jure and the Malmö gig so suggestions are still very much appreciated xD
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tj-crochets · 4 months
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I know I said it might be poofy dress time again but I think instead it is time to make a bag!
My favorite uncle’s favorite color is BRIGHT orange (he’s been known to dress head to toe in orange) and he has a lifelong quest to visit every national park in the US, so when my dad saw this fabric he asked me to turn it into a bag for my uncle. Since neither my dad nor I knew what we were doing when it came to “how much fabric does a bag use”, it might be two or three bags? I’m not sure yet lol
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danothan · 10 months
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tough pill i have to swallow is realizing that “getting better” doesn’t mean “getting to do more things,” getting better for me means taking better initiative in protecting myself. and THAT means making sure i do LESS things
#sounds kinda obvious but i only just realized it lmao#feels like i have to grieve a lot of my goals now but no one said the healing process would be easy#danbles#and for anyone else that has a disability that prevents them from doing smth#or trauma that makes certain triggers limit their opportunities#or neurotypes that make it harder for them to love smth like they used to#or whatever else#i don’t want to make it sound like you have to give up on the things that make you happy#I’M certainly not going to#but a huge value of mine has always been experiencing everything life had to offer#and everytime that backfires (whether it’s burnout; triggering a flashback; triggering an episode; putting strain on my body; etc)#i always just thought to myself ‘it was bad timing’ or ‘i haven’t gotten better yet’ bc the endgoal was to always get to that point where#i could experience it. i want to try new things all the time. i want to feel normal and be included in everything#but if smth keeps Making Me Feel Bad then maybe there isn’t a version of myself that can take it on#it’s not resilience to put yourself in harm’s way#idk how well i’ll be able to put this into practice tbh. i rly rly like exploring different experiences#even negative ones are valuable to me#but the least i can do for myself is recognize that i might not always be the problem#maybe i’ve already hit the limit on all the self-work i can do. maybe it’s the environment or situation itself that’s the problem#fuuck guys ​i feel like i’m going thru a stage of grief here why is this shit so hard 💀
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