#medium long but still

[charrfie]

Oh I meant the ones in your discomforts!!! Sorry I should’ve specified. I just thought it may come off as intrusive / rude, I’m glad it didn’t bc it wasn’t supposed to

Thank you for specifying!! <3 I can answer, but with some I may not be able to fully go into detail for personal reasons. Since you in your first ask you specified fandoms, thats all I'll be covering!

Without getting into the details, ow*ri no ser*ph and m*stic m*ssanger (censoring not bc the name itself is a trigger but bc I don't want my blog showing up under ANY searches with this) are things my abuser really loved so I can't really bear the thought of them or see pictures from them :^/ not that there's anything wrong with either series (I don't... think? I was never too interested in finding out ANYTHING about them really) but I prefer people to not interact who enjoy them for that reason. Just. For distance's sake (distance between me and the source material that is)

Alien 9 emulators is a different story though! As you may know, I'm a HUGE fan of alien 9???? Like?? Duh??? I feel like it's all I use tumblr for sometimes, just for alien 9 content. That being said alien 9 emulators Fucking Sucks. Basically any alien 9 content that isnt the original 3 volumes/the anime sucks (like alien 9 next, etc). I wrote nearly a whole essay about it one time trying to explain my viewpoints on it so it's hard to simplify my reasons but I'll try (tw csa but I'll do my best to skim over it). Basically: I feel like it's undeniable that a large part of alien 9's story is about children becoming victims of whatever kind of abuse the adults in the series perpetuate. This *includes* csa. That is an INCREDIBLY prominent aspect in the story, and while it is most obvious in kasumi's arcs, it's present in every arc, every character. Granted, it is ALWAYS through metaphor. Leaving you to put the pieces together, as most of the series does even with other topics. So, to quote my essay: "Emulators takes all of those intricately and gently crafted metaphorical plot points and turns them on their heads." The victims break from the healing they were doing, continue the cycle to become abusers themselves, and (though a petty gripe compared to the rest) it retcons SO many things to make way for these twisted fucking metaphors and careless storytelling??? It doesn't even fucking BOTHER to provide some sorry excuse as to WHY it is doing this. THAT is why it's on that list in my carrd

Tldr: alien 9 emulators is horribly disrespectful (and arguably actively harmful) to the very people it originally wished to uplift

[antirepurp]

the way jolyne breaks so much convention as a jojo protagonist from not being introduced as an inherent badass and having to earn the right to be called that over the course of the story to her life being over from the moment that story begins while still not painting the events of it as a soul-crushing tragedy but rather a journey through which she reconciles and finds new meaning and purpose to herself as a person. i love jojo stone ocean i wish women were real

[piyo13sdoodles]

day 5 on chapter 15 of Hands of the Emperor:

He played until the full moon sailed high above them, his last song one of the endless longing of a poet who had fallen in love with the Moon. [...] "It is nearly the eclipse," his Radiancy said in a quiet voice, and Cliopher realized that he probably knew its coming far more intimately than any of them.

[coffeebanana]

i love how optimistic i am when outlining long fics it's like "oh wow if i just plan this all out and then Follow. The. Plan!! it will totally be SO EASY. i mean i can have it all done so quickly!"

...ignoring the fact that this has never once happened 😂

[repurposedmeatlocker]

On one hand, I agree that there should be a more diverse field of subject matter utilized in "adult animation". Not all "adult animation" should be used as an excuse to revolve around shock content and gratuitous potty humor. At this point in time, stuff like this being seen on prime-time television is no longer out of the ordinary. And, from my observation, is done well even less frequently. There should be more films that treat themselves seriously and explore an array of topics rather than just comedy with a middle-school idea of mature subject matter.

ON THE OTHER HAND. I don't think there is ANYTHING wrong with animated movies and shows with lots of drugs and boobies and sex and gross jokes. I think cartoon characters having freaky sex is funny af. Both have the right to exist together. Art should not be pigeon-holed through a lens of "respectability" in order to be taken seriously. Demanding adult animation be "palatable" for an "adult" audience ultimately strips it completely of what makes it a unique medium for expression in the first place.

[tosahobi-if]

I miss Iseul 😔

just for you, anon!

[asdcats]

Ways my autism affects me (some of these may cross over or be worsened by other disabilities), and what support I need

In loud environments I may struggle to speak, and in extreme cases (such as at concerts) I can loose the ability completely

Trouble with volume control (often told to speak up or stop shouting)

Trouble reading the tone of my own voice. Sometimes it doesn't seem to match how I feel.

Sometimes I feel the need to preform facial expressions to make up for my mismatched vocal tone

I often need help with writing emails/texts. Both in getting my point across and making sure the tone is right (not rude, too informal etc)

May need prompting/help joining or starting a conversation

Need supervision at the doctors as I can become overwhelmed and tend to not be able to process/remember what is being said

Whilst I can make some phone calls on my own I often need someone listing in on the conversation or even have them make the call on my behalf

I also need time to recover after phone calls no matter how short/casual

Audio processing issues

Can struggle to start tasks unless they are part of the days schedule/to do list (self imposed to do lists can sometimes work but are more likely to fall apart)

If one thing on the to do list is cancelled or altered (planing on doing something ehen im home alone and mum comes home early? Can't do it now. Doesn't matter if her being here is irrelevant its just not possible) my brain can short circuit and I may not be able to do other things I need to do even if theyba(I have gone a week or more without showering because of this)

Can struggle to stop tasks unless there is a clear stopping point (I have worked a full shift without a single break because there were no scheduled breaks and no one telling me to take one)

Can get sensory overloads and underloads

Will sometimes bite/hit/scratch myself, slam my head into walls, rub my skin until it burns

Struggle to leave the house without headphones (can do it if I have to but I will become overwhelmed and need to go back home a lot more quickly) due to sensory issues (and anxiety)

Can't wear clothes that are made from wool or velvet (or similar materials), have an image stitched on where the stitching can be felt from.the inside, or where they are loose in some areas but tight in the wrong areas (shirts with long puffed sleeves are the worse offenders of this)

Can have shut downs over sensory oveloads

Can have meltdowns usually caused by emotional triggers (being yelled at, bus being late causing my anxiety to spike), unexpected changes (on Saturday I nearly had a meltdown just because they brought me a chocolate fudge cake instead.of a fudge cake even though I like chocolate fudge. Because it wasn't what I asked for so I wasn't expecting it), loosing things no mater how small/unimportant (I once had a meltdown in college because I couldn't find my pen at the end of the day. Did I need it right there and then? No. Was it my only pen? No. Was it special? No. Did I have an emotional attachment to it? No. Did I still hurt myself over loosing it? Yes.)

Can not drive (poor spatial awareness, delayed reaction times)

Need someone to come with me if going to an unfamiliar place (once I've memorised the route I'm usually OK on my own) as I can get lost very easily and may panic

Have rules that whilst aren't super rigid I will be uncomfortable if they are broken (must sit on the same side of the sofa, must have certain drinks with certain foods, can't have chips/pasta/rice two days in a row)

Need help filling out forms

May need supervision whilst cooking an unfamiliar recipe (can't cook most things without one no matter how many times)

Can struggle with eye contact (though this isn't all the time)

Struggle to read.own emotions beyond good, bad, and ... unless very strong

Struggle to remember emotions unless.tied to a specific person or event (how have you been feeling this last week? Is my least favourite question)

Can have little or no empathy (depending on the day/ person) but a lot of compassion/sympathy/fear of people deciding to attack me for there bad moods that gets mistaken for empathy

Can sometimes struggle to get things done due to thinking about my special interest(s) (this morning I couldn't even sit down because I was thinking about transformers)

Can experience emotional.distress if stuck in a conversation that I have no interest in (I will.fein interest to be polite.but I will be fighting the urge to implode)

Trouble reading bodies queues (need to eat on a schedule so I don't skip meals)

Poor fine and gross motor skills (this one's more dyspraxia but there is some cross over), resulting in me dropping things, walking into walls, mistyping a lot (something you may have noticed reading this) and even sometimes drooling

Can only work part time and can struggle to meet basic needs on a work day

Whilst I'm not visibly autistic everyone can at least tell there's something different about me after only a short time interacting (I have never been told I don't look autistic)

(I also qualify for group housing and my mum should be getting carer support)

And yet there are still people who refuse to acknowledge I'm.disabled

[sysig]

Guess who :3c (Patreon)

[maximusboltaqon]

nothing like looking directly at maximus references to realize just how much longer i draw his hair 😳

[sqlmn]

Lightning, water, and fire! Like forever before the plot starts. By the time the plot starts, the lightning and fire deities have been subjected to punishment by the two gods that picked them.

Oh (the fire deity) is first to be punished. They basically decide that since they're going to live for a long time, gotta set some long time goals! And they opt to be the wrath of the gods since most of the other deities are too 'soft' in their opinion. So Oh just. Smites humans. This isn't really a /good/ thing and in their defense mentally, they do it to help Ymber since he's the softest of them all. So their punishment by the gods is to be split in two, effectively halving the power of one into two. (Now they are in a male and a female body and use both male and female pronouns apart since they together make they but apart it feels weird to be they. But prior to the split they use they/them. Also the split bodies go by the names Ohiwe and Ohime.)

Fulj is the second to be punished. She falls in love with a mortal woman and that is a crime according to the gods. Mortals and immortals are not to be together and it will only bring suffering to both sides. So her punishment is her memories of the woman are stripped and her body basically broken to the point she can't remain physical all the time.

Ymber, unfortunately, is the one who blames himself for the discoveries and punishments. If he had only tried to restrain Oh more then maybe they would have chilled out and stopped before being punished. If he had only tried to persuade Fulj to not continue seeing the mortal woman so often perhaps she wouldn't have been punished. So he's just increasing the guilt on his shoulders every day that he remains unpunished since the elder gods have both laid down to rest. They can't enforce their laws anymore and none of the deities are keen on harming one another at this point. They just want to continue existing in peace.

[doyelikehaggis]

Tagged by @blairwaldcrf thank you bestie, I love stuff like this <3

Rules: go here and make a poll with your top 10 most listened-to artists (long term!) and let your followers choose:

Tagging @joanthangroff @dance-is-life27 @spicy-cannoli @aurea-corde @rhyslahey @quinnigallagherjones @alltid-og-for-evig no obligation to do this whatsoever, but if you see it and want to do it, please feel free!

[tj-crochets]

The purple baby quilt that had been hanging in front of my messiest set of shelves for a few months is finally going to be mailed to a baby, so the rainbow chaos scrap quilt is now hanging there!

I love it I get art in my room and also can ignore the mess on the shelves behind it lol

[anghraine]

I don't normally have much of a sense of humor about the LOTR movies or Certain Choices (all the choices) made with Faramir and Denethor.

That said, I do find it a little bit funny that, in the attempt to make Faramir sympathetic in ROTK, it leans so far into poor teary-eyed woobie Faramir who is regarded with undiluted tragic(??) contempt by his awful and also incompetent and unhinged father. A lot of the rationale for the choices made in TTT came down to "Faramir is too perfect and invulnerable for film." But book Faramir is at his most vulnerable in ROTK, and arguably his most flawed.

He's scared when he rides towards the Ringwraiths (more courageously in the book, to be sure) and contracts the Black Breath. He's still vulnerable, but also far more assertive with Denethor especially (who is far more formidable in the book), to the point that his restraint with Denethor eventually snaps and he lashes out, effectively blaming Denethor for Boromir's death. That could easily be played as a pretty brutal moment that highlights how tragically far their relationship has devolved, despite their pained love for each other. It's not in the movie at all.

Faramir essentially insists that he's opposed to the defense of the river crossing (not a suicide mission in the book! a planned retreat that inflicts major casualties on Sauron's armies!) and will only go if explicitly commanded, maneuvering Denethor into a position where he has to back down or give the order. It's not even certain in the book that Faramir was right in opposing the tactic; it bought the time needed for the Rohirrim to reach Minas Tirith.

Film!ROTK is pretty much uncritical of Faramir (his choice to lead a bunch of men to their deaths on a pointless doomed mission because his terrible father doesn't love him is mainly treated as sad for him). The Faramir of the ROTK-the-book is still treated as deeply admirable, but he's messier, more aggressive, yet still very vulnerable at times. And there is something vaguely funny to me about going from "oh, he's too perfect in the book to be recognizably adapted" to papering over nearly all complexities and flaws in his character.

[that-one-poison-trainer]

4 and 5, stupidest injuries you've ever gotten and given

stupidest injury I've ever gotten? Probably when I chipped my baby teeth on an Oreo? Does that count

As for the stupidest injury I've ever given that has to go to me accidentally giving @lostlornghost minor bran damage back when I was a medium because how the fuck was I supposed to know that would happen?!

[stealthnoodle]

Current BG3 bullshit: Dishonour* Mode with SMT's Mothman. The song in the video is "Mothman (YMCA Parody)" by Studio Bunny, which felt right.

*Honour Mode but I choose Continue when I wipe because I've never had a spontaneous bad idea that I didn't relentlessly pursue, and I'm not abandoning that ethos for a mere cheevo

For this run, my terrible son has three guiding principles:

Always choose violence when violence is a dialogue option

When violence is not an option, choose [Intimidation] or at least being a rude little bitch

Ignore anything that is not immediately interesting

Also he's a Durge because of course he is.

Examples of how this has played out include running right past Shadowheart without even looking at her on the ship (she was surprisingly not mad about this later), killing both Astarion and Lae'zel in camp when their actions presented a prompt to do violence, and never recruiting Gale because his hand was so succulent and severable.

He also ran right through the Inquisitor's Chambers in the creche to the Blood of Lathander and never looked back. Githyanki ambush before leaving Act 2 didn't even happen. Just blipped right off their radar. Iconic.

Something new-to-me in this run was discovering that if you start a fight in the grove and subsequently have to kill all the druids, Karlach is REAL MAD, so she never made it into the party. I then decided to tell Minthara an invasion sounded fun, planning to stab her in the back, but it turns out that there's no invasion proper if the druids are dead, so after a long rest she and the goblins had overrun the grove on their own. Wyll never even got a chance to object!

Luckily there was still an [Attack] option when I talked to her, so Mothman got to carry out his cunning scheme, aggroing all the goblins in the grove in the process.

(There's a reason I'm letting myself Continue, and it's that all of Mothman's choices might be politely described as "sub-optimal.")

In this case I didn't even need to, though, because I threw my Spectator-in-a-bottle into the midst of the goblins and it turned out to be a great strat. Spectator killed all the goblins in the area, goblins got Spectator down to single-digit HP on their way out, and Mothman finished it off with a li'l sneak attack.

I love this game.

So long story short, I essentially raided the grove without losing Wyll by doing it in the most ass-backward way possible. Yay?

And it's a good thing I kept him, since Astarion got himself staked early on trying to snack on Mothman, and then Lae'zel had her "we're all infected" freakout in camp, so he and Shadowheart were the only companions still around. Since Lae'zel was the last to go out, I honored her with this hireling homage:

Turns out my biggest challenge on this stupid run has been shopping. Mothman finished Act 1 with zero vendors still alive. Obviously he killed Isobel in Act 2 as soon as his butler offered him a shiny reward for doing so, and he drew his weapon on the Moonrise Tower guards as soon as he met them, so he ended up with a sea of corpses and nobody who would talk to him but Araj Oblodra (an uneasy alliance which ended in Act 3 when she caught him rifling through her stuff and oops there's an [Attack] response to that).

My second biggest challenge, and what I thought would be my run-ender, was fucking Myrkul. Did I jump down the big hole without adequately prepping? Yes. Did I forget the single-use healing pod near the boss isn't actually a long rest and doesn't restore abilities or short rests? Yes. Did I have a very stupid loadout for a boss I have fought at least five times now? Also yes. After I had to hit Continue for a fourth time, I began to despair. Had the single save file cooked me?

It had not! I just needed to ferment the perfect cheese.

I wish I had screencaps of this bullshit but I was too frustrated to remember to take them by the time I figured this out, lolsob. If you are stuck in a hole with Ketheric Thorm and short on options, here is your ticket out:

You can get a surprise round, thank you Invisibility. One good sneak attack with Cull the Weak can take out the mindflayer.

Shadowheart's reward spear for killing the Nightsong lets you cast Shar's Darkness as an action as often as you like. If you cast it around your party from way back near the entrance, Ketheric becomes confused and does not summon more necromites. He just stands on the platform and yells. Old Man Yells at Cloud, literally.

Once you have slowly chipped his health away without expending resources, your biggest problem is that you have mostly piddling attacks, and Myrkul has a big health pool and can heal himself. OR CAN HE?

Bro can't see shit in the dark. Drop darkness centered on him and he gets blinded. His necromite snacks can run up to him, but he can't see them to gobble them up.

Do damage as fast as you can with whatever you have. Throw shit. Read scrolls. Give the magic spear to Skyrim Mod Lae'zel to handle Darkness from a distance and park Shadowheart up on Myrkul's ass with Spirit Guardians. Make Wyll summon Connor over and over to distract Myrkul from hitting her.

CONGRATULATIONS, you've spent half your Saturday on this.

Things got better in Act 3. Mothman can't have beef with every vendor in the city at once.

But you know what he can have? Specific, stupid beef with Gortash.

This keeps happening.

Also I can't believe I pulled that off without wiping even once. (The game crashed three times because my bell tower ladder strats were too elite, but I finally found a compromise that didn't make the game shit itself while I slogged through the fight. With only three party members, because I didn't have anything to make Wyll fly and couldn't be bothered with shopping. The only survivor of my nonsense was Skyrim Mod Lae'zel, who chugged an invisibility potion and climbed down vines to escape. Still!)

A funny consequence of my timing was that Mizora showed up in camp the night Gortash kicked the bucket and did her usual "I'll tell you where to find your dad in exchange for your soul" spiel, so I thought, well, let's see how that works out for us. Wyll, sell your soul. Again.

(I would feel worse about putting Wyll through that on top of everything else he's suffered this game, but look. He stayed in the party. His approval is HIGH. Somehow. He is Mothman's little Mothstan. This is what it's like on the dark side, buddy.)

The answer is that I got a quest maker for the sub that goes to the Iron Throne, but obviously the sub is not there, because Gortash is dead. "Sorry, Wyll, guess you sold your soul for nothing!" is what I would have said, except when I went down for my next long rest, the Duke popped out of thin air next to Mizora. As you can see in the video, he didn't quite have his being-alive-legs yet, but he figured out how to stand up in the morning. So I did his Wyrmway quest. As a treat.

Anyway, now Mothman just needs to beat up his sister with his cool Slayer form that he loves to pop as often as possible, and then he's off to the endgame! I expect everyone will be shocked when he takes control of the Netherbrain even though he's been loudly and proudly making his intentions known all game.

I'll close this out by saying that I let the randomizer make me a guardian again, and I forgot what it made until I was surprised and delighted by sexy facetats Santa:

[idontmindifuforgetme]

Giving my hair the Big Chop soon. I’ve decided