#long term solution is organizing it

[tj-crochets]

The purple baby quilt that had been hanging in front of my messiest set of shelves for a few months is finally going to be mailed to a baby, so the rainbow chaos scrap quilt is now hanging there!

I love it I get art in my room and also can ignore the mess on the shelves behind it lol

[iridessence]

Rashida Tlaib is a powerhouse. Her grandmother just passed away under occupation (her words) but she’s still organizing for HEAL Palestine— an initiative providing Health, Education, Aid, and Leadership opportunities in a collective effort to help heal Gaza’s youth.

A donation to HEAL Palestine will help shelter, feed, and treat injured and sick Palestinians who have fled military violence, and who are in dire need of basic necessities including food, clean water, and medical supplies because of Israel’s cruel blockade. currently HEAL is working to open a neonatal intensive care unit (NICU) and a new maternity department in Rafah, plus sponsoring medical teams to go to Gaza.

In addition to funding urgent needs, a donation will support long-term solutions and projects in Palestine as well, such as mental health and mentorship for children who’ve been living with trauma their entire lives, and programs to rebuild Gaza’s education and health systems.

Here’s the link to donate.

[theantoniomabs]

Benefits of the Printful Membership Programs

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[astrocafecoffee]

💫Your future spouse's career based on your Juno persona chart 💫

✨ For entertainment purposes only. Enjoy.✨

🌜what to check?

- just check your Industria (389) asteroid in your Juno persona chart.Find out in which house it falls in!!

Why this asteroid?

- Juno persona chart tells about your future spouse and Industria(389) asteroid is a long term career related asteroid. So this asteroid in your juno persona chart can give a insight about your future spouse's career.

🌜SOME SHORT TERMS I USED HERE :

- FS = FUTURE SPOUSE

-JPC = JUNO PERSONA CHART

Leshh go!

🌆 Industria in 1st house of JPC : 1st house represent one's identity, personality and how they present themselves to the world.This asteroid in 1st house suggests that their career may be tied to their personal identity and innovative spirit. Now some possible career of your fs-

*Entrepreneurial scientist - they may excel in entrepreneurial pursuits within the scientific community. They may innovate new technologies, products that have a significant impact in their field.

* Industry leader - they maybe known for their innovative idea and proactive attitude to their work. They can easily be a leader of their respective industry.

* visionary consultant - they may excel in their field as a respectful advisor, who offers solutions to businesses or individuals seeking guidance.

* Creative director- career in creative leadership such as creative director in advising, film, fashion, or design.

* makeup artist

* Model

* engeneering

* design/ work in media.

🌆 Industria in 2nd house of JPC : Their career may be closely related to their values resources, managing or utilising assets and their sense of stability. Some possible career of your fs -

* wealth management specialist - they helps individuals or organizations maximize their financial resources and investments through innovative and strategic approach.

* Creative Financial analyst - specialised in creative or innovative analysis methods.

* Financial innovator- innovates new financial products, services or strategies.

* asset manager

* Entrepreneurial investor

* can sing well

* accountant

🌆 Industria in 3rd house of JPC : 3rd house represents one's communication style, mental persuits, and interaction within immediate environment. When this asteroid in your 3rd house this can indicate that your fs may excel in the career of innovative communication methods or technologies. Some possible career of your fs -

* They may into journalism, media, broadcasting, or public relations where someone uses their creative ideas.

* technology writer/ blogger: their career path may involve writing / blogging about technologies or industry trends or sharing their ideas with wide audience.

* Workshop/ educational outreach programs.

* small business owner

* excel in troubleshooting skills, problem solving abilities, explaining complex concepts in simple terms.

🌆 Industria in 4th house of JPC : their career tied to their home , family roots, and emotional well-being.some possible career of your fs -

* career in real estate - specialize in designing sustainable, eco friendly, or technologically advanced buildings.

* e- commerce, consulting, freelance work.

* Family councillor or therapist - they may help individuals and families navigate challenges, fostering harmony and growth within te hone environment.

* interior designer

* Home renovation specialist

* Family owned business owner.

* childcare provider

🌆 Industria in 5th house of JPC : 5th house is associated with creativity,joy, children and hobbies. It governs one's individual approach to work, self expression and personal fulfillment. So your fs career strongly related to this area of life. Possible careers -

* creative artist/ entertainer - Excels in creative profession like music , theater , film, writing etc.

* event planer- organizing wedding, festivals or social gathering.

* teacher/ coach - inspiring or guiding others in academic subject/ sports.

* youth councillor - natural affinity to work with young people and helping them to discover their talents.

* atrs nd crafts business owner.

* fitness instructor

* dance teacher

* entertainment industry professional.

🌆 Industria in 6th house of JPC : 6th house is associated with employment, daily task, health and service to others. So possible career of your fs -

* health care professionals - career related to healthcare, nursing, doctor, medicine, and pharmacy.

* nutritionist/ dietician - helping others to improve their dietary habits , manage health condition.

* fitness trainer/ coach - motivates others to adopt healthy lifestyle.

* administrative professional - may indicate talent for efficiency, attention to detail, making career in administrative or office management appealing.

* environmental scientist

* social worker

* reasearch assistant

🌆 Industria in 7th house of JPC : 7th house is related to marriage, buisness partnership, legal matters, and one-on-one interactions. Possible career domains of your fs-

*legal professional - career related as mediators, legal consultant, specialization in areas such as contrat law , family law or dispute resolution.

* business consultant - expertise in the area of strategy, negotiation, and partnership development.

* marriage and family therapist - helping couples navigate challenges, improve communication and strengthen their bonds through therapy or councilling sessions.

* international business manager

* foreign affair specialist

* event coordinator

*public relation specialist

* human resources manager

🌆 Industria in 8th house of JPC : 8th house is associated with themes such as mysteries, psychology, healing, emotional connection. So possible careers of your fs -

* psychologist/ psychotherapist - your fs may excel in trauma therapy, helping others to navigate profound emotional experiences , uncover hidden truth.

* forensic investigator/ crime analyst- they may be focused on uncovering hidden truths and solving mysteries.

*massage therapist - specialize in modalities such as deep tissue massage, craniosacral therapy or helping clients release emotional/ physical tension through healing.

* reasearch scientist - may excel in fields such as psychology, quantum physics, or consciousness studies.

* occultist - astrologer, tarot reader, or spiritual councillors.

* healer/ energy worker

* heal others through their respective fields. Can be. Singer too .

🌆 Industria in 9th house of JPC: 9th house is associated with themes such as higher learning, expansion of horizons , seeking truth, broadening one's perspective through travel/ exploration. Possible careers of your fs -

* international relations specialist - involve promoting international cooperation, resolving conflicts, forming mutual understanding between nations and cultures.

* spiritual teacher/ guru- your fs may pursue careers as spiritual teachers, gurus, mentors, guiding others on their spiritual journey.

* tour guide

* philosopher

* religious leader - may pursue careers as priests, ministers, guiding and supporting communities in matters of faith and spiritual growth.

* global NGO worker

* foreign language teacher

🌆 Industria in 10th house of JPC: 10th house is associated with themes such as career aspirations, social status, reputation, and professional achievements. This asteroid influences the individual's approach to career, public image, authority, ambition. So possible careers of your fs -

* media personality/ influencer - television hosts , journalist, bloggers, social media influencer , reaching a wide audience.

* creative director/ artist - artist, designer, performers.

* CEO

* startup founder, business owner, or self employed professionals.

* legal professional/ lawyer

* educational administrator

🌆 Industria in 11th house of JPC: when your industria asteroid in this house your fs may excel in the career of social network, group affiliation, humanitarian causes, collaboration etc. So possible careers of your fs -

* social entrepreneur - creates innovative solutions to adress social challenges.

* Tech entrepreneur, start-up founder.

* content creator - social media influencers, bloggers, using their platforms to inspire/ educate peoples.

* environment activist

* advocate

* community organizer

* designing educational platforms , or promoting digital literacy.

🌆 Industria in 12th house of JPC: 12th house is often associated with hidden strengths, spirituality, and working behind the scenes. So possible careers of your fs -

* they might work in reserch and development, data analysis or logistical planning behind the scenes.

* astro- spiritual researcher

* music industry

* astrologer

*song writer.

* mystical or spiritual advisor.

* environmental conservationist.

⚡ Note : these are only some possibilities of careers of your fs. And guys check the degrees to , it's like cheery on top 💌

🌜Don't forget to check my other observations too 👀

That's it guys , see you soon 💝

- piko 💖

[slyandthefamilybook]

since we now know that all those "my blog is safe for Jewish people" posts are bullshit, here are some Jewish organizations you can donate to if you actually want to prove you support Jews. put up or shut up

FIGHTING HUNGER

Masbia - Kosher soup kitchens in New York

MAZON - Practices and promotes a multifaceted approach to hunger relief, recognizing the importance of responding to hungry peoples' immediate need for nutrition and sustenance while also working to advance long-term solutions

Tomchei Shabbos - Provides food and other supplies so that poor Jews can celebrate the Sabbath and the Jewish holidays

FINANCIAL AID

Ahavas Yisrael - Providing aid for low-income Jews in Baltimore

Hebrew Free Loan Society - Provides interest-free loans to low-income Jews in New York and more

GLOBAL AID

American Jewish Joint Distribution Committee - Offers aid to Jewish populations in Central and Eastern Europe as well as in the Middle East through a network of social and community assistance programs. In addition, the JDC contributes millions of dollars in disaster relief and development assistance to non-Jewish communities

American Jewish World Service - Fighting poverty and advancing human rights around the world

Hebrew Immigrant Aid Society - Providing aid to immigrants and refugees around the world

Jewish World Watch - Dedicated to fighting genocides around the world

MEDICAL AID

Sharsheret - Support for cancer patients, especially breast cancer

SOCIAL SERVICES

The Aleph Institute - Provides support and supplies for Jews in prison and their families, and helps Jewish convicts reintegrate into society

Bet Tzedek - Free legal services in LA

Bikur Cholim - Providing support including kosher food for Jews who have been hospitalized in the US, Australia, Canada, Brazil, and Israel

Blue Card Fund - Critical aid for holocaust survivors

Chai Lifeline - An org that's very close to my heart. They help families with members with disabilities in Baltimore

Chana - Support network for Jews in Baltimore facing domestic violence, sexual abuse, and elder abuse

Community Alliance for Jewish-Affiliated Cemetaries - Care of abandoned and at-risk Jewish cemetaries

Crown Heights Central Jewish Community Council - Provides services to community residents including assistance to the elderly, housing, employment and job training, youth services, and a food bank

Hands On Tzedakah - Supports essential safety-net programs addressing hunger, poverty, health care and disaster relief, as well as scholarship support to students in need

Hebrew Free Burial Association

Jewish Board of Family and Children's Services - Programs include early childhood and learning, children and adolescent services, mental health outpatient clinics for teenagers, people living with developmental disabilities, adults living with mental illness, domestic violence and preventive services, housing, Jewish community services, counseling, volunteering, and professional and leadership development

Jewish Caring Network - Providing aid for families facing serious illnesses

Jewish Family Service - Food security, housing stability, mental health counseling, aging care, employment support, refugee resettlement, chaplaincy, and disability services

Jewish Relief Agency - Serving low-income families in Philadelphia

Jewish Social Services Agency - Supporting people’s mental health, helping people with disabilities find meaningful jobs, caring for older adults so they can safely age at home, and offering dignity and comfort to hospice patients

Jewish Women's Foundation Metropolitan Chicago - Aiding Jewish women in Chicago

Metropolitan Council on Jewish Poverty - Crisis intervention and family violence services, housing development funds, food programs, career services, and home services

Misaskim - Jewish death and burial services

Our Place - Mentoring troubled Jewish adolescents and to bring awareness of substance abuse to teens and children

Tiferes Golda - Special education for Jewish girls in Baltimore

Yachad - Support for Jews with disabilities

[rxmxa]

💕☁️𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝟏𝟐𝐭𝐡 𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐬𝐮𝐛𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐝☁️💕

I recently got a dream journal (its giving sharkboy and lava girl). and by dream journal I mean I just type them into a journal app on my phone lol.

i have uranus in the 12th house and i really do get flashes of insight (uranus) in my dreams or just as im about to fall asleep (12h). but i decided to keep track of them bc like WEEKS ago i told my coworker about a dream and then she brought it up how it reminds her of a current situation at work. and i was like you know what! you’re right girl. and im constantly having dreams and ik with that placement i have sudden and vivid dreams that give me insights or solutions to problems i might have! if u have 12h placements u should keep track of your dreams! type, write or record!

꒰ᐢ. .ᐢ꒱ We know that the 12th house is linked to mental health, imprisonment, retreats, reality constructs, secrets, fears, hidden enemies, need for privacy. its the house of “self undoing” and the house of “the unseen.” so without a doubt, it can represent your dream life and whats lurking through your subconscious when you’re asleep or when your mind is an altered state of consciousness(like how your 12h sign can show how you act when you’re high or drunk 😗).

꒰ᐢ. .ᐢ꒱ Planets in the 12th house can show you more about your dream life. For example, with Sun in the 12th house, your dreams may reveal truths about your purpose (Sun). If you have Moon in the 12th house, your emotional world is deeply connected to your dreams, often reflecting hidden feelings. People with Neptune in the 12th house might have dreams that seem prophetic, offering spiritual or mystical insights. With Venus in the 12th house, your hidden desires related to love and beauty surface in your dream world. If you have Mercury in the 12th house, dreams may be filled with symbols, conversations, or mental puzzles, reflecting subconscious thoughts or messages. Mars in the 12th house may bring dreams filled with repressed anger, hidden drives, or unexpressed desires for action. Those with Jupiter in the 12th house might experience expansive, visionary dreams that offer wisdom or insights into their spiritual growth. Saturn in the 12th house could lead to dreams about fears, limitations, or responsibilities, helping you confront hidden anxieties. Like I had said, Uranus in the 12th house can result in sudden, unexpected dreams that feel revolutionary or bring flashes of insight about change, while Pluto in the 12th house often manifests deep, transformative dreams tied to power, control, or subconscious fears.

✧₊⁺ if you don't have any planets in the 12h you can still find out more about your dream world by looking at the 12th house from your 12th house (aka the 11th house). This is like putting a microscope to your 12th house using derivative astro!

✧₊⁺ this also tells us that the subconscious mind is deeply influenced by our community, social networks, and dreams of the collective. ✧₊⁺

✧₊⁺ Aries 11th House: You may dream about leading or standing out in social groups, reflecting your hidden desire for independence and leadership.

✧₊Taurus 11th House: Dreams about long-term relationships and loyalty in friendships may show your deep need for stability and security in social circles.

✧₊Gemini 11th House: You might dream about conversations and sharing ideas, revealing your subconscious wish for connection through communication.

✧₊Cancer 11th House: Dreams about nurturing or feeling close to friends can reflect your desire for deep emotional bonds within groups.

✧₊Leo 11th House: You may dream about being in the spotlight or receiving attention from friends, which shows a desire for recognition and admiration in groups.

✧₊Virgo 11th House: Organizing and improving things in dreams could reveal a hidden wish to be helpful and bring order to your social interactions.

✧₊Libra 11th House: Dreams about fairness and balancing relationships can show your subconscious need for harmony and peace in social settings.

✧₊Scorpio 11th House: You may have intense dreams involving power or hidden emotions in friendships, reflecting deeper feelings of trust or betrayal in social dynamics.

✧₊Sagittarius 11th House: Dreams about adventure or exploring with groups could reflect a desire for freedom and meaningful connections through shared experiences.

✧₊Capricorn 11th House: Dreams of achieving success in a group or earning respect may reflect your hidden need for structure and accomplishment in your social life.

✧₊Aquarius 11th House: You may dream of unique or futuristic social settings, reflecting a subconscious desire for individuality and innovation in your interactions.

✧₊Pisces 11th House: Dreams about unity or blending into a larger cause may show a subconscious desire for compassion and spiritual connection with your social circle.

⋆°•☁︎⋆you can also look at your 12h ruler to tell you important things about your inner world, dreams, and hidden feelings. Where this planet is placed in your chart (by house and sign) shows how your subconscious mind affects different parts of your life. 𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ ☁️་༘ for example: my 12h ruler is in the 4h and i have dreams about family members that have passed away.

⋆°•☁︎⋆12h ruler in the 1h: Your hidden thoughts and dreams have a strong effect on your personality and how you present yourself to others.

⋆°•☁︎⋆12h ruler in the 2h: Your hidden emotions influence your values, money, and self-worth. Dreams might reveal fears or desires about money or security.

⋆°•☁︎⋆12h ruler in the 3h: Your inner thoughts affect how you communicate and learn. Dreams may involve siblings or daily conversations.

⋆°•☁︎⋆12h ruler in the 4h: Your subconscious mind is linked to your home and family life. Dreams could bring up past memories or emotions connected to family.

⋆°•☁︎⋆12h ruler in the 5h: Your hidden desires are connected to creativity, love, and fun. Dreams may reveal hidden passions or romantic feelings.

⋆°•☁︎⋆12h ruler in the 6h: Your subconscious mind affects your daily routines, health, and work. Dreams might highlight worries about your health or work habits.

⋆°•☁︎⋆12h ruler in the 7h: Your relationships are connected to your inner world. You may dream about your partners or have hidden fears about relationships.

⋆°•☁︎⋆12h ruler in the 8h: Your subconscious mind is tied to deep issues like power, intimacy, and transformation. Dreams might bring up fears or feelings about change or control.

⋆°•☁︎⋆12h ruler in the 9h: Your dreams and inner thoughts are connected to your beliefs, travel, or learning. You might dream about faraway places or spiritual journeys.

⋆°•☁︎⋆12h ruler in the 10h: Your hidden thoughts influence your career and public image. Dreams might reveal what you really want from your job or how you want to be seen by others.

⋆°•☁︎⋆12h ruler in the 11h: Your subconscious mind affects your friendships and future goals. Dreams could involve friends or hidden hopes for the future

⋆°•☁︎⋆12h ruler in the 12h: Your subconscious is very strong, and you may have powerful dreams, strong intuition, and a deep connection to spirituality.

[natsaffection]

heyyy so i have this idea and i think no one can write it like you so yeah.

forced marriage between Natasha and reader in the present time. they both don't like each other because of this situation yk but with time they come around each other.

i know this is a really classic one but I've been thinking about this for a long time and sending a request to you seemed like a good idea considering your beautiful writing. but of course it's okay if you don't want to write it! hope you're having a good day!!! (or night idk��😭) 💗

I see you. | N.R

Warnings: Forced Marriage for a Mission, a lot of arguments, Drinking, mentioned of sex while beeing drunk (both)

Word count: 6,7k

A/n: I hope it makes sense. I thought for a long time about how best to implement this scenario and found this solution to be the most plausible..(The beginning takes place before the invasion of Loki)

Natasha sat stiffly, her gaze sharp and unforgiving, fixed on the man sitting across from her. Nick leaned back in his chair, his one good eye studying her with an intensity that matched her own. “So, what’s this about, Fury?” Natasha’s voice was as cold as the steel walls surrounding them in the underground briefing room of the Avengers headquarters. She had been urgently summoned, pulled out of a mission briefing that had been weeks in the making, and the weight of this interruption hung heavy in the air.

Fury exhaled slowly, his fingers drumming on the edge of the sleek metal table. The silence stretched just long enough that Natasha’s patience nearly snapped. “It’s about alliances.” he finally said, his tone measured, as if he was still deciding how much to reveal. Natasha’s eyes narrowed. “I thought we had our alliances sorted out. Stark has the tech, Banner is working on the gamma projects, and I’m ready to handle the intel with Rogers. What’s missing?”

Fury’s lips pressed into a thin line, and he leaned forward, his hands tightly clasped together as if preparing for what he was about to say. “What’s missing is political stability. The kind that can’t be bought with technology or power. We need trust, and that’s in short supply these days.”

“Trust?” Natasha scoffed. “From whom? What aren’t you telling me?” He met her gaze, unwavering. “There’s a situation with Y/n.”

Natasha’s brow furrowed slightly. The name struck a nerve. You were no stranger in her world. Known for your diplomatic skills and sharp intellect, you were a key figure in international negotiations, often brokering deals that kept the world from chaos. You weren’t just a diplomat, you were a force, wielding influence in ways even Natasha respected. But that didn’t explain why you were the subject of this mysterious meeting.

“And what does that have to do with us?” Natasha asked, her voice low and laced with suspicion. Fury’s next words fell like a hammer. “You’re going to marry her.” For a moment, the words didn’t register. Natasha stared at Fury, waiting for the punchline to a joke that never came. “Excuse me?”

“You heard me right, Romanoff." Fury replied, his tone unyielding. “This marriage is the only way to secure the alliance we need. Your influence can grant us access to certain..resources and information that we desperately need. This goes beyond SHIELD, it’s about global security.”

Natasha leaned back in her chair, crossing her arms over her chest. “And you think a forced marriage is magically going to solve all these problems?”

“I’m not saying it’ll be easy.” Fury admitted. “But this isn’t about love or personal happiness. It’s about necessity. We need a visible, undeniable alliance, something that other nations and organizations can see and recognize as a commitment. A marriage between you and Y/L/N would achieve that.”

Natasha’s jaw tightened. She was a soldier, a spy, a warrior..she had never allowed anyone to dictate the terms of her life, let alone something as personal as marriage. The very idea was repugnant to her, and yet..Fury’s expression told her this wasn’t just an idea, it was an order. The stakes were high, as they always were in her line of work, but this felt different. This felt personal in a way she hadn’t expected.

“And what makes you think she’ll agree to this?” Natasha asked, struggling to keep her voice steady. She wasn’t ready to show more emotion than necessary. “She’s already agreed.” Fury said, and Natasha felt the ground shift beneath her feet. “She understands how important this alliance is. She’s as reluctant as you are, but she knows what’s at stake.”

Natasha let that sink in for a moment. She didn’t know you well, but she knew of you, respected you even. You were someone who didn’t back down easily, who saw through lies and acted on your convictions. If you had agreed, then the situation was worse than Natasha had thought.

“And if I refuse?” she asked, though she knew the answer, but she needed to hear it. Fury’s expression hardened. “You won’t refuse. You’re too smart for that, Natasha. You know what’s at stake. You’ve always done what was necessary.”

Natasha exhaled slowly, her mind racing. She didn’t want this, she didn’t want to be tied down by something as archaic as marriage, especially not to someone she barely knew. But Fury was right. She had always done what was necessary, no matter the cost. And this, it seemed, was just another mission, one that would require all her skills to navigate.

“Fine..” she said finally, her voice clipped. “I’ll do it. But don’t expect me to play the happy housewife.” Fury almost smiled, but it was a cold, thin smile. “I wouldn’t dream of it.”

Natasha’s mind raced as she left the cold, sterile briefing room. Fury’s words echoed in her ears, a reminder that her life was no longer entirely her own. As she walked through the corridors of the SHIELD headquarters, her footsteps echoed ominously, each step bringing her closer to a fate she hadn’t chosen.

Her phone vibrated in her pocket, pulling her out of her thoughts. It was a message from Fury again:

Meeting with Y/N in conference room in five minutes. Be there.

No time to think, no time to prepare. Typical. She took a deep breath, trying to steady herself before heading to the designated room. Natasha arrived at the conference room a few minutes early. The room was empty, the lights dimmed, casting long shadows across the table. It felt oddly impersonal, a stark contrast to the gravity of what was about to be discussed. She stood by the window, staring out at the headquarters’ grounds, trying to gather her thoughts.

The door opened behind her, and Natasha turned as you entered the room. You were dressed in a tailored suit, exuding the same sovereign confidence that had made you a respected figure in the diplomatic world. But there was something else in your eyes. A hint of irritation, maybe even anger. Clearly, you weren’t any happier about this situation than she was.

“Natasha.” you greeted her with a curt nod, your voice cool and distant. “Y/n.” Natasha replied just as coolly. She crossed her arms and leaned against the windowsill, her eyes narrowing as she studied the person in front of her. “So, I guess we’re getting married.”

You let out a short, humorless laugh. “Looks that way. Not that either of us had a choice.” Natasha raised an eyebrow. “And whose fault is that? If you and your people hadn’t been so secretive, we might not be in this mess.” Your face hardened, a flicker of anger crossing your features. “Oh, please. Don’t act like SHIELD is any better. You’re all about secrets and manipulation. This marriage is just another one of your little games.”

Natasha’s eyes narrowed further. “You think I want this? To be tied to someone I barely know, just to fulfill a political agenda? Don’t kid yourself.”

“Kid myself?” You scoffed and took a step closer, your voice rising. “Do you think it’s any easier for me? Being forced to marry the Black Widow, of all people? I know your reputation, Natasha. You’re a manipulator, a killer. This is the last thing I wanted.” Natasha’s jaw clenched, her anger boiling up. “And what about you? You’re no saint either, Y/n. You’ve played your games, made your deals behind closed doors, pulled strings to get what you want. Don’t pretend you’re any better.”

Anger flashed in your eyes. “At least I don’t hide behind a mask of false righteousness. I do what needs to be done for the greater good, just like you. But don’t mistake necessity for desire. I have no interest in playing house with someone who doesn’t even know what trust means.”

Natasha felt a sharp sting of anger mixed with something else, something she didn’t want to name. “Trust? That’s rich, coming from you. You’ve built your career on deception. And now you expect me to believe you’re the victim here?” You stepped closer, your voice low and sharp. “I don’t care what you believe. We’re both victims of this situation, but if you think I’m just going to roll over for you, you’re sorely mistaken.”

Natasha’s anger flared again, her voice turning icy. “I wouldn’t dream of it. Let’s get one thing straight, I’m not here to make you happy. This is a business arrangement, nothing more. We’ll play the part when necessary, but other than that, stay out of my way.”

For a moment, they stood facing each other, only inches apart, the tension crackling between them like a live wire. Finally, Natasha turned away, breaking the tense silence. She moved to the table and sat down, forcing herself to focus. “Let’s talk logistics. The sooner we get this sorted, the sooner we can get it over with.”

You took a deep breath, regaining your composure, and sat down across from her. “Agreed. But don’t expect me to make it easy for you.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it.” Natasha shot back, her voice dripping with sarcasm. “I have an apartment in Brooklyn. It’s secure, and there’s enough space for both of us without stepping on each other’s toes. We can start moving your things tomorrow.” Your eyes narrowed. “Brooklyn? How convenient for you. Always need to have the home-field advantage, don’t you?”

Natasha offered a crooked smile, though it didn’t reach her eyes. “I’m practical. It’s close to headquarters, and it’s safe. Unless you have a better suggestion?” Your lips pressed into a thin line, clearly dissatisfied but unwilling to argue further. “Fine. But don’t expect me to play the obedient spouse. I need my space, my own office, my own schedule.”

“Fine.” Natasha responded sharply. “I don’t want you around me all the time anyway. We’ll do what’s necessary to make this look real, public appearances, a few shared events, then back to our own lives.” You leaned back in your chair, arms crossed. “And what about the media? They’re going to follow us everywhere, looking for any crack in the facade.”

Natasha waved a hand dismissively. “We’ll handle it. Stick to the script, and we won’t have any problems. There’s no need to make this more complicated than it needs to be.” You remained unconvinced. “You’re acting like this is so simple. But we both know there’s nothing simple about this.”

Natasha’s eyes hardened. “We don’t have a choice, Y/n. We do this because we have to, not because we want to.” Your jaw clenched, your voice turning icy. “Believe me, Natasha, the last thing I want is for this to work. But I’ll do what needs to be done. Just don’t expect anything more from me.” The two of you sat in silence for a moment, the weight of your mutual dislike hanging heavy in the air. This was going to be a nightmare..

In this silent moment, an agent came in with a pile of paper stuff. He sensed the tension immediately and just put it on the table and quickly left the room.

Thebtable was now filled with details on how your upcoming marriage would be presented to the world. It was an intricately crafted plan, covering everything from the official story of how you met to the timeline of your relationship and your behavior in public. Every detail had been meticulously planned by SHIELD’s PR team to ensure that the marriage appeared genuine.

You flipped through the pages with a grim expression, your fingers gripping the edges of the paper as if you wanted to tear them apart. “This is ridiculous..” you muttered, not bothering to hide your frustration. “They expect us to memorize a script? Like we’re actors playing a part?”

Natasha, sitting across from you, “That’s exactly what we are.” she said coolly. “This isn’t a real marriage, remember? We’re playing a role for the public.”

You shot her a sharp look. “I’m well aware. But this..” you gestured contemptuously at the file “is insulting. ‘Shared interest in global politics and mutual respect for each other’s abilities’? Really?” You read the lines aloud, your voice dripping with sarcasm. “They’re acting like we’re two diplomats who fell in love over a discussion on trade agreements.” Natasha’s eyes narrowed slightly. “Would you prefer they invent a fairy tale romance? At least this version is believable. It’s not like we have a real story to fall back on.”

You slammed the file shut with a loud bang that echoed in the small room. “We wouldn’t need to make anything up if we weren’t being forced into this situation.” Natasha’s jaw tightened. “No one’s forcing you to stay. If you have a better solution, by all means, let me know.”

You sighed in frustration, rubbing your temples. “You know as well as I do that there isn’t one! Fury made sure of that.” Natasha watched you silently for a moment, her expression unreadable. “Then we make the best of it. We memorize the script, play the show, and get it over with.”

You looked up at her, your eyes flashing with anger. “That’s easy for you to say. You’re used to lying, aren’t you? Playing different roles, lying to people’s faces. But this..this isn’t just another mission, Natasha. This is our lives.”

Natasha's eyes hardened at the accusation. "You think I don't know that? You think I enjoy being paraded around like a puppet? I've spent my entire life fighting for control over my own decisions, and now I'm being told who I have to marry. So don't act like you're the only one angry about this." Your lips pressed into a thin line, your anger momentarily softened by a flicker of understanding. "Then why are you so calm? Why aren't you angrier?"

Natasha exhaled slowly, working to keep her emotions in check. "Because anger won't change anything. We're stuck in this, whether we like it or not. The sooner we accept that, the sooner we can figure out how to deal with it." You stared at her for a long moment, your expression softening just a little. "So we learn the script, smile for the cameras, and pretend we don’t hate each other?"

Natasha leaned forward slightly, her voice low and controlled. "Yes, we pretend we don't hate each other. But we have to make it believable. People will be watching us closely, if they sense something is off, the whole show falls apart. That means we need to know each other, at least enough to sell the act."

You raised an eyebrow, skepticism evident on your face. "And how do you suggest we do that? Some getting-to-know-you games? Maybe ‘Two Truths and a Lie’?" Natasha gave a humorless smile. "We start with the basics. We go through the script and fill in the gaps with real information. What's your favorite food? What do you do in your spare time? What’s your biggest pet peeve? Things that couples know about each other."

You leaned back in your chair, arms crossed, clearly not thrilled with the idea. "Fine. But don't expect me to share my deepest secrets."

"I wouldn't dream of it." She opened the file again and flipped to a page titled *Personal Details*. "It says here that you enjoy hiking and reading. Is that accurate, or did they make it up?" You rolled your eyes. "It's true. I like hiking when I have the time, and I read a lot, mostly history and politics, but they don't need to know that in detail."

Natasha nodded, making a mental note. "Good. We can work with that. Mine says I'm into physical fitness and strategy games." She paused and looked at you with a raised eyebrow. "Is there anything else we should add?" You looked at her thoughtfully before replying. "You like ballet, right? I read that somewhere." Natasha blinked, surprised by this observation. "Yes, that's true. Not many people know that."

"Well, it’s part of who you are.." you said, your tone less confrontational now. "We could use that." Natasha nodded, slightly impressed by this small concession. "Good. We'll add it to the list." You continued to go through the script, exchanging brief, factual information about yourselves, preferences, dislikes and childhood memories that could be used to support your fake story. But every answer was tinged with tension, each of you holding something back, building walls around yourselves.

After nearly an hour of discussion, you closed the file with a sigh and rubbed the back of your neck. "This is going to be a disaster." Natasha leaned back and crossed her arms. "Not if we're careful. We stick to the plan, stay on script, and give them no reason to doubt us."

You met her gaze, your expression weary but determined. "I just don't know how long we can keep this up. People will expect us to act like we actually care."

"We don't have to care." Natasha said, her voice cold and distant. "We just have to pretend we do." You shook your head, frustration evident in your voice. "And what happens if we slip up? If one of us says something off-script? We can't be perfect all the time."

"We won't slip up." Natasha said, her tone leaving no room for argument. "We're both professionals. We've been in situations far more stressful than this. We'll manage." You stared at her for a moment, searching her face for a crack in her ironclad facade. "You really believe that, don't you? That we can just fake our way through this lie without any consequences?"

Natasha's gaze remained unchanged, unyielding. "I believe we don't have a choice." The room fell into a heavy silence, the weight of your situation pressing down on both of you. This wasn't just about memorizing lines or putting on a good show, it was about maintaining a facade that could crumble at any moment, exposing you both to public scrutiny and potential danger. Finally, you stood up, your movements stiff with unresolved tension. "I guess we'll see, won't we?" Natasha stood as well, her posture mirroring yours. "Yes. We will."

The days passed in a blurred whirl of public appearances, each one a carefully staged performance that only deepened the rift between you and Natasha. Every event, every gesture, every word was meticulously planned, yet the underlying tension between you was impossible to ignore. The first major event you attended as a married couple was a high-profile gala, the kind of glittering affair where the rich and powerful gathered under chandeliers to sip champagne and discuss global affairs. Natasha had attended similar events countless times before, but never under these circumstances.

You wore an elegant black evening gown that accentuated your every movement, while Natasha was dressed in a sharp suit. As you walked into the ballroom, her hand rested lightly on your back, a gesture meant to appear familiar, but to you, it felt like a shackle. "Ready to charm the masses?" she murmured with a sarcastic edge as you entered the room.

The night was a marathon of forced smiles and carefully calculated interactions. You moved through the crowd like seasoned professionals, your hand never leaving Natasha's back as you met with diplomats and high society, maintaining the facade of a loving couple. But beneath the surface, Natasha could feel your simmering anger, mirroring her own. At one point in the evening, as you were cornered by a particularly nosy journalist, Natasha's patience was put to the test. The journalist smiled broadly and inquisitively as she fired off questions about your supposed whirlwind romance.

"How did you two meet?" the journalist asked, her eyes sparkling with curiosity. Natasha suppressed an eye roll, but her voice remained smooth and warm as she responded. "We met at a diplomatic conference. We were both there on separate missions, but we kept running into each other. Things developed from there."

You seamlessly picked up the conversation, though your smile was a bit too stiff. "It didn’t take long for us to realize how much we had in common. After that, everything just fell into place naturally." The journalist seemed satisfied with the answer but continued to probe. "And when did you know it was love?"

You hesitated, your smile faltering for a split second before you recovered. "It wasn't just one moment. It was a lot of little things that made us realize we couldn’t imagine our lives without each other." Natasha forced herself to smile at you, her fingers lightly brushing your arm in a gesture meant to appear affectionate. "Yes, it was all those little moments that made it clear."

As the journalist moved on, Natasha could feel the tension in your posture, your hand pressing a little more firmly against her back, as if you were reminding her of your shared discomfort. "That was close.." you muttered as you both retreated to a quieter corner of the room. "We handled it." Natasha replied curtly, her voice barely above a whisper. "That’s what we do."

The rest of the night proceeded in much the same way, the two of you moving through the room, presenting the perfect image of a loving couple. But every touch, every smile, every word was carefully calculated, and by the time you finally left the gala, Natasha felt as if she were about to snap from the strain.

The ride back to your shared apartment was suffocatingly silent. The driver, a SHIELD agent, wisely kept his eyes on the road, leaving you both to your thoughts. When you arrived 'home', you immediately went to the kitchen to pour yourself a stiff drink. Natasha followed you, already on edge, her patience worn thin by the constant charade.

You turned to her, your expression hard. "You're really good at this, you know that? At pretending. It’s almost like it’s second nature to you." Natasha tensed as she heard the accusation in your words. "I had to be good at it. It's my job."

You let out a humorless laugh. "Your job. Right. I guess that's what happens when you're trained to be a spy from childhood. You learn to play whatever role is required." The words hit a sore spot, and Natasha's eyes narrowed dangerously. "Careful, Y/n. You don't know what you're talking about."

You took a step closer, your voice dropping to a near growl. "Don't I? You’ve spent your whole life being prepared for this, haven’t you? To lie, to manipulate, to make people believe whatever you want them to. This whole marriage..this whole act..probably means nothing to you."

Natasha felt her anger flare, her hands clenching into fists at her sides. "You think this is easy for me? You think I enjoy lying about every aspect of my life, pretending to be someone I’m not?" You didn’t back down, your eyes burning with frustration. "But you're damn good at it, aren’t you? Must be all those years in that room. They made you the perfect little actress."

That was the breaking point for Natasha. Her eyes flashed with anger as she stepped forward and closed the distance between you. "You have no idea what the Red Room did to me. What it took from me. So don’t you dare try to twist that into some kind of compliment!" You stood your ground, your own anger flaring in response. "I’m not giving you a compliment, Natasha. I’m saying it’s terrifying how easily you slip into these roles. How convincing you are at pretending to care."

Natasha's breathing quickened, her pulse pounding in her ears. "You think I want to be convincing, huh? You think I want to be good at this? I’ve spent my entire life fighting to break free of what the Red Room made me, and now I’m stuck in another damn role..and it’s with you."

Your jaw tightened, your anger now tinged with something that looked like guilt. "Maybe it’s not just a role for you. Maybe you don’t even know who you are when you’re not on a mission." The words cut deep, and for a moment, Natasha didn’t know how to respond. But the anger was too strong, too raw to let go. "You don’t know anything about me. Nothing about what I’ve been through, what I’ve had to do to survive."

You both stood there, staring each other down, the air between you crackling with fury and unspoken pain. Natasha's chest heaved with the force of her emotions, her mind a whirlwind of anger and hurt that she could barely keep in check. You set your glass down with a sharp clink, your face tight with suppressed frustration. "You know what? Maybe you’re right. Maybe I don’t know you. But it sure as hell feels like you’re more comfortable in this lie than I am."

Natasha turned away, her hands trembling with the effort to contain her rage. "Go to bed, Y/n." You didn’t respond, simply turning on your heel and leaving the room, your footsteps echoing through the apartment. Natasha waited until she heard the door to your shared bedroom close before she finally let out a shaky breath. She was too good at pretending, far too good. And that was the problem. Because despite all her skills, all the years of training and missions, this felt different. It felt personal in a way she hadn’t anticipated, and your words had struck a nerve deep within her.

As Natasha stood alone in the kitchen, she couldn’t shake the feeling that you had seen through her facade in a way no one else ever had. The truth was, this marriage, this charade, was wearing her down in ways she hadn’t expected. And the more time she spent around you, the harder it became to maintain the mask she had worn for so long. She wanted to dismiss your words as just another argument, another clash of wills between two people who were forced into a situation neither wanted. But the truth was, you had hit on something she didn’t want to admit, even to herself. With a heavy sigh, she finally turned off the lights and headed to bed, her mind still racing. She wasn’t sure how much longer she could keep this up, but she knew one thing for certain. Whatever this was between the two of you, it was far from over.

The days that followed were intense, with both Natasha and you deeply immersed in your respective missions. Despite the tension between you, you had found a certain rhythm, maintaining your cover as a married couple while focusing on the tasks at hand. Your partnership was more functional than personal, efficient, strategic, and devoid of unnecessary emotional entanglements.

But that all changed when Loki appeared.

When chaos erupted in New York, the two of you were thrown right into the conflict, working side by side with the newly formed Avengers. The stakes were higher than ever, and there was no room for mistakes. You fought shoulder to shoulder, defeating Chitauri soldiers and securing key positions as you tried to save the city from destruction.

It was during one of those intense moments, after Natasha's confrontation with Loki, that everything changed. Loki had made it a point to bring up Natasha's past, the "red" in her ledger, the sins she had committed, the people she had hurt. He taunted her with names and events that Natasha had long tried to forget, using her guilt as a weapon to break her. The words were meant to destroy her, to make her doubt her worth, and they hit harder than any physical blow. But Natasha, the eternal professional, pressed on, using her pain as fuel to outmaneuver Loki and secure the information they needed. But the damage was done. The conversation with Loki had revealed more about Natasha’s past than she ever wanted anyone, especially you, to know.

After the battle, when the Avengers had won and the immediate threat had passed, Natasha returned to the SHIELD Helicarrier. The city was still in chaos, but the focus had shifted to recovery and rebuilding. Natasha was exhausted, both physically and mentally, the weight of Loki's words hanging over her like a dark cloud.

You had always had a keen sense for people, always quick to pick up on the smallest changes in mood or behavior. It was one of the reasons you were so good at your job. But now that sharp intuition was focused on Natasha, and it made her feel exposed in a way she wasn’t prepared for.

After debriefing with Fury, Natasha retreated to the quiet of your shared apartment, hoping to find a moment of peace. She had barely sat down on the edge of the bed when she heard the door open behind her.

“Natasha?” Your voice was soft, cautious, as you entered the room. Natasha didn’t turn around, but she could feel your probing gaze on her.

“What is it, Y/n?” Natasha’s tone was curt. She was too tired for this conversation, too drained to face another confrontation. You hesitated, the silence between you stretched out. “I..wanted to talk to you.” Natasha closed her eyes, bracing herself for another argument. “About what?”

“About Loki.” you said, your voice carefully measured. "We need to talk about what he said." Natasha’s muscles tensed, her back straightening as she tried to suppress the rising wave of fear in her chest. “I’m fine, Y/n. You don’t need to worry about me.”

“That’s the point, Natasha.” you continued, taking a few steps closer. “I am worried. I know I’ve pushed you before, teased you about your past, but I didn’t..I didn’t realize it was something so serious.” Natasha’s jaw tightened, her hands clenched into fists at her sides. She didn’t want to have this conversation, not now, not ever. “I’ve already told you, my past is none of your concern.”

“But it is, Natasha!” Your voice was firmer now, the frustration evident. “We’re supposed to be partners, and I feel like I don’t know you at all.” Natasha finally turned to face you, her eyes narrowing as she stood. “You don’t know me, Y/n. And that’s how it’s supposed to be. I didn’t ask for your sympathy, and I don’t need your pity.”

Your expression hardened, but there was a flicker of pain in your eyes. “This isn’t about pity, and you know it. I’m just trying to understand.”

“Understand what?” Natasha snapped, her voice rising. “That I’ve done things I’m not proud of? That my past is full of blood and darkness you can’t even imagine?” You flinched at the sharpness in her voice, but you didn’t back down. “You’re right. I don’t know everything, but that doesn’t mean I don’t care. I’m trying to apologize, Natasha. For pushing you, for not realizing.”

Natasha stared at you, her anger battling with something deeper, something she didn’t want to name. “Why? So you can feel better? So you can feel like you’ve done the right thing?” Your eyes flashed with frustration. “No, damn it! I’m doing this because I care about you. Because, despite everything, I don’t want to keep fighting against you! Its draining..”

For a moment, you stood facing each other, the air between you charged with tension. Natasha felt her defenses beginning to crumble, the walls she had built around herself starting to give way under the weight of your words. Finally, she let out a shaky breath, her shoulders sagging as the fight drained out of her. “You want to know the truth?"

Natasha sat down on the edge of the bed, her hands resting on her knees as if she needed to hold herself together. “The Red Room..it destroyed me. It took everything I was and made something else out of it. Something that had no choice, no control.” You sat down beside her, but you kept your distance, respecting the space she needed. “You didn’t have a choice, Natasha. You were a child.”

“That doesn’t change what I did ” Natasha said quietly, her voice trembling slightly. “I killed people. Innocent people. And I..I enjoyed it, Y/n. Back then, I enjoyed it because that’s what they made me.” You reached out, placing your hand gently over hers, but you said nothing. You knew this was a moment where words couldn’t do much.

Her voice was soft and laced with pain. “The things I’ve done..the people I’ve hurt..you can’t just brush that aside. The Red Room wasn’t just training, it was torture, it was conditioning, it was turning little girls into weapons. I did terrible things because I was programmed to. Because I didn’t know any better.” She paused, as the memories came flooding back with painful clarity. “And even after I got out, even after I tried to make up for it, the past still haunts me. Loki knew exactly where to strike, exactly how to remind me of the monster I once was.”

You listened in silence, your heart aching at the pain in Natasha’s voice. “You’re not a monster, Natasha.” She shook her head, a bitter laugh escaping her lips. “That’s easy for you to say. But you didn’t see what I did. You didn’t live it.”

“No, I didn’t. But I’ve seen who you are now. I’ve seen how hard you fight to do the right thing, how much you sacrifice. That’s not the work of a monster. That’s someone trying to make things right.” Natasha turned to you, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. “But what if it’s not enough? What if it doesn’t matter what I do, and I can never atone for what I’ve done?”

You took her hands in yours. “You don’t have to do it alone, Natasha. You don’t have to carry this burden by yourself. I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere.” Natasha looked down at your hands, the warmth of your touch grounding her in a way she hadn’t expected. For so long, she had believed that her past was something she had to face alone, that no one could understand the shadow that had shaped her. But in this moment, with you by her side, she realized that maybe, just maybe she didn’t have to be alone anymore.

“I’m sorry.” Natasha whispered, her voice breaking. “For pushing you away.” You squeezed her hands gently. “I’m sorry too. For not seeing how much you were hurting.” You sat there for a long moment in silence, the weight of the past finally beginning to lift, replaced by something new..something fragile, but real. It wasn’t love, not yet, but it was trust, and for now, that was enough.

The days after your late-night conversation were different, marked by an unspoken understanding that hadn’t been there before. Natasha and you continued with your missions, and the world was still recovering from the chaos of Loki’s attack, but something between you had shifted. Where there had once been tension and unspoken resentment, there was now a cautious, growing trust.

You moved around each other more easily, your conversations were less strained, your silences less heavy. The sharp edges of your interactions had softened, replaced by a tentative camaraderie that surprised you both. You weren’t friends yet, and certainly not lovers, but you were no longer just colleagues forced into a marriage of convenience. You were partners..genuine partners.

One evening, after a particularly exhausting mission, you returned to the Helicarrier and noticed the weariness weighing on Natasha. Her shoulders were slumped, and her usually sharp eyes were dulled with fatigue. But there was also something else, a lightness that hadn’t been there before, as if the burden she carried was now a little less heavy. “You look like you could use a break.” you said, your voice light but laced with concern. Natasha glanced at you, a small, tired smile playing on her lips. “You’re not wrong. This week has been hell.”

“More than usual.” you agreed. “How about we grab a drink? No talk about missions, just..a chance to unwind.” Natasha hesitated for a moment, her instinct to decline warring with the realization that maybe, just this once, she didn’t have to handle everything on her own. “Yeah, okay. That sounds good.”

You headed to one of the quieter lounges on the Helicarrier, a small, dimly lit room where off-duty agents could relax. It wasn’t exactly cozy, but it was private enough to talk without the weight of your roles hanging over you. You ordered a couple of drinks, and the two of you sat down at a small table near the window, through which the vast, dark night could be seen. For a while, you drank in silence, the easy silence between you a far cry from the tense moments of the past.

“You know..” you began after a while, swirling your drink in your glass, “I’ve been thinking about what you said. About carrying this burden alone.” Natasha looked at you, her gaze steady but curious. “Yeah?”

“I’ve just..been thinking about how we’re supposed to be partners in this, but we’ve been so focused on keeping our walls up that we forgot what that really means." you said thoughtfully. “It’s not just about watching each other’s backs in a fight. It’s about being there for each other when things get tough, when the past tries to drag you down.”

Natasha nodded slowly, her fingers tracing the rim of her glass. “I’m not used to that, you know. Letting someone in.”

“I figured..” you said with a small smile. “But you let me in, at least a little. And I want you to know that it meant something. It made me realize that maybe I haven’t been as fair to you as I could have been.” Natasha’s expression softened, a mixture of gratitude and vulnerability in her eyes. “You don’t need to apologize, Y/n. We were both just doing our jobs.”

“I know.” you replied. “But still, I’m sorry. For pushing you, for not seeing how much you’ve been through. I was so caught up in the mission and the cover that I didn’t take the time to really see you.” Natasha took a sip of her drink, letting the warmth of the alcohol ease the tension in her shoulders. “You see me now.” she said quietly. “And that’s more than I’ve let anyone do in a long time.”

You sat in companionable silence for a few more minutes, the atmosphere between you relaxed and open. Natasha realized that it was a relief not to have to be constantly on guard, not to have to keep everyone at a distance. “You know.." you said after a while, your tone lighter, “I’ve been thinking that when all this mess is over, we should take a break. Do something normal. I hear married couples go on vacations.” Natasha chuckled, the sound low and genuine. “I’m not sure we pass as a normal married couple.”

“Who said anything about normal?” you grinned. “We could do something out of the ordinary. Like..I don’t know, skydiving or rock climbing. Something that gets the adrenaline pumping without the life-and-death stakes.” Natasha raised an eyebrow, a playful glint in her eyes. “So you want us to jump out of a plane..for fun?”

You shrugged, a mischievous smile on your lips. “Why not? After everything we’ve been through, it might be nice to do something that gets the heart racing without our lives depending on it.” Natasha considered it for a moment, then smiled, a real smile, not the practiced one she used in public. “You know what? That actually doesn’t sound so bad.”

You clinked your glasses together, and as the evening wore on, you talked about everything and nothing. Trivial things like favorite foods and music, and deeper topics like your dreams and fears. The walls between you continued to crumble, and by the time you finally returned to your apartment, there was a new understanding between you. “Thank you, Y/n. For tonight.” You smiled back, your voice warm. “Anytime, Natasha. We’re in this together.”

“Yeah.” Natasha replied, the words feeling truer than ever before. “We are.” As you parted ways for the night, Natasha felt a lightness in her chest that she hadn’t felt in a long time. It wasn’t just the drink or the fact that she had survived another day, it was the knowledge that she wasn’t alone anymore. That for the first time in years, she had someone she could trust.

The following weeks were different. Natasha and you continued to work together, your partnership now stronger as the initial tension had eased. You were still far from being a typical married couple, but the foundation of trust you had begun to build made all the difference. One day, after a particularly successful mission, Fury called you both into his office. His expression was as unreadable as ever, but there was a hint of something, perhaps approval in his gaze.

“You two have done good work.” Fury said, his voice even. “The mission was a success, and your cover held under pressure. I have to admit, I wasn’t sure how this partnership would work, but you’ve exceeded expectations.”

Natasha glanced at you briefly, and you shared a small, knowing smile. “Thank you, sir.” Natasha replied. Fury nodded, then leaned back in his chair, his gaze sharpening. “That said, I’m not sure how much longer we can maintain the appearance of this marriage.”

You raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean?” Fury sighed, a rare sign of weariness passing over his face. “The situation has stabilized for now, but I have a feeling more trouble is on the horizon. You two have done your job well, but I’m giving you the option to dissolve the marriage if you think it’s the right move.”

Natasha felt a pang of something she couldn’t quite identify, regret? Uncertainty? She looked at you, searching your face for a clue as to what you were thinking. You met her gaze, your expression thoughtful. “I think..we should talk about it. See where we both stand.”

Natasha nodded slowly, a strange mix of emotions swirling in her chest. “Yeah. We’ll figure it out.” Fury watched you both for a moment, then gave a curt nod. “Take your time." With that, he dismissed you, and you left the office in silence, the weight of the decision heavy on your minds.

As you walked through the corridors, Natasha felt a sense of unease rising in her stomach. She hadn’t expected this, hadn’t expected to feel anything at the thought of ending the marriage. But now, the idea left a strange emptiness inside her. “So..” you said quietly as you reached your quarters, “what do you want to do?”

Natasha took a deep breath, turning to face you. “I don’t know." she admitted. “This started as a mission, as a cover. But now..I don’t know.” You nodded, your expression understanding. “I get it. It’s complicated.”

Natasha hesitated, then reached out and took your hand in hers. “But I know one thing. Whatever happens, I don’t want to lose what we’ve built. I don’t want to lose this..partnership.”

You stood there for a long moment, holding each other’s gaze, the air between you charged with unspoken possibilities. Finally, you smiled, a genuine, warm smile that made Natasha’s heart skip a beat. "I have a good Idea where we can talk further.."

The lounge was quiet, with only the occasional murmur of conversations on the other side of the room. Natasha and you had had a few drinks again, the alcohol warming your bodies and loosening your tongues. You had been talking for hours, the conversation flowing easily between you in a way it hadn’t before. The heaviness of your earlier tensions had lifted, replaced by a comfortable, almost intimate atmosphere.

Natasha took another sip of her drink, enjoying the burn as it slid down her throat. She looked at you, watching as you swirled the last bit of your whiskey in your glass, your eyes slightly glazed from the alcohol. Your words slightly slurred, “I never thought we’d end up here. Not like this.”

Natasha laughed, her own voice tinged with the effects of the alcohol. “Yeah, me neither. This whole thing… was unexpected.” You leaned back in your chair, your gaze fixed on Natasha. “But..I’m glad we’re here. I’m glad we’re talking like this.” Natasha felt a warmth spread through her, one that had nothing to do with the alcohol. “Me too.” she admitted, her voice softening. “It’s nice…not feeling alone.”

You smiled, a crooked, slightly drunken smile that made Natasha’s heart skip a beat as she felt a surge of emotions she wasn’t entirely ready to name. “You’re not alone, Natasha. Not anymore.” There was a charged moment between you, the air thick with unspoken words and the weight of your shared experiences. The alcohol had lowered your defenses, leaving you both more vulnerable and open than you had been in a long time.

Natasha set her glass down, her fingers lightly brushing against yours on the table. The touch was electric, sending a shiver of awareness through her. She looked up and met your gaze, and in your eyes, she saw the same spark of attraction that she felt. For a moment, neither of you moved, the tension between you growing more intense with each passing second. Then, as if drawn by an invisible force, you leaned across the table, and your lips met Natasha’s in a gentle, hesitant kiss.

Natasha’s breath caught in her throat, her heart pounding as she responded to the kiss, her lips moving against yours in a way that felt both familiar and completely new. The kiss was tentative at first, an exploration of boundaries, but it quickly deepened as the need for each other became overwhelming.

Without breaking the kiss, you stood and pulled Natasha up with you. Your hands found each other’s bodies, exploring, touching, as you made your way out of the lounge and down the corridor to a quarter. Your kisses grew hotter, more desperate, as you neared the room. You fumbled with the keycard, finally managing to open the door, and the two of you tumbled inside, your bodies pressed tightly together. As you finally made it to the bed, the rest of the world seemed to disappear. There was only the two of you, entwined with one another, your kisses hungry, your touches urgent. The alcohol had stripped away your inhibitions, leaving only the raw desire for each other.

The night passed in a blur of passionate moments and whispered names, your bodies intertwined as you lost yourselves completely in each other. The connection between you deepened with every touch, every kiss, until there was no distance left between you, no more walls to keep you apart. When you finally fell asleep, your bodies were still entwined, your breaths mingling as you drifted into a deep, contented sleep. The alcohol had done its job, lowering your defenses and bringing you together in a way neither of you had expected.

The first thing Natasha felt as she slowly woke up was the dull pounding in her head. She groaned softly, turning over and pulling the blanket tighter around herself, trying to block out the morning light seeping through the curtains. But as she moved, she realized something was off, something warm and solid was lying beside her. She froze, her senses suddenly sharp despite the hangover. Slowly, she opened one eye and was immediately met with the sight of you lying next to her, your face turned toward her, still fast asleep.

Natasha’s breath hitched as the events of the previous night came rushing back to her. The drinks, the laughter, the conversation that had unexpectedly turned personal..and then how you had ended up here, wrapped in each other’s arms. Her heart pounded in her chest as she tried to piece everything together. You had both been drunk, very drunk but that didn’t explain everything. How had you gone from reluctant partners in a forced marriage to this point? What had driven you to cross a line she hadn’t even realized you were approaching?

“shit." Natasha muttered quietly, careful not to disturb you as she tried to extricate herself from the sheets. But as she moved, you stirred beside her, your eyes slowly fluttering open. For a moment, you both simply stared at each other, your expressions mirroring the shock and confusion that Natasha was feeling. “Morning.” you finally said, your voice rough and uncertain.

“Morning.” Natasha echoed, her voice just as hesitant. There was a long, awkward silence as you both tried to process the situation. Natasha could see the same questions in your eyes that were running through her own mind: How had this happened? What did it mean? And where do you go from here?

“I..uh..did we…?” you began, clearly struggling to find the right words. Natasha’s cheeks flushed slightly as she nodded. “Yeah. I think we did.”

You rubbed your hand over your face, slowly sitting up as you tried to shake off the remnants of sleep and alcohol. “Okay, so…how did we end up here?” Natasha bit her lip, trying to recall the details. “We were talking..had a lot to drink. And then..I don’t know. One thing led to another, I guess.” She managed a small, ironic smile. “But at least we don’t have to invent any lies if someone asks us about our sex life now.”

You chuckled at her comment, and the tension in the room eased slightly. “True. It’s almost like we’ve fully embraced our roles now. Now that she's finished.” Natasha rolled her eyes but couldn’t suppress a small smile. “I guess we’re just overachievers.”

The laughter died down, and once again, the reality of your situation set in. Things had gotten personal in a way neither of you had anticipated. “So…what do we do now?” you asked, your tone more serious this time.

Natasha sighed, sitting up and wrapping the sheet around herself. “I don’t know. We could just pretend nothing happened, but… that feels like we’d be lying to ourselves.”

“Yeah, and we’ve done enough pretending to last a lifetime.” you agreed, your expression thoughtful. “But we also can’t ignore the fact that this all started as a mission. A mission where we were supposed to pretend to be in love, even though we didn’t really like each other.” Natasha nodded, the weight of that truth pressing down on her. “Right. And now we’ve crossed a line, and I don’t think we can just go back.”

You frowned, deep in thought. “But do we need to go back? I mean, we’ve been through a lot together, and… I don’t know. Maybe this was just..inevitable?” Natasha looked at you, searching your face for any hint of what you were really feeling. “Maybe. But now it’s complicated. We can’t just act like everything is the same as before.”

Your smile, “Hey, at least we’re dedicated to the mission, right?” Natasha laughed, the sound easing some of the tension. “Right. We’ve more than fulfilled our duties.”

You both laughed, the tension between you beginning to dissipate. The humor was a relief, a way to ease the confusion and discomfort that came with waking up in each other’s bed after what was supposed to be just another night of playing your roles. But as the laughter faded, the reality of your situation remained. You couldn’t just laugh your way out of this, you had to figure out what it meant for you.

“So…what do we do now?” you asked again, your tone more serious this time. Natasha sighed, running a hand through her hair as she tried to organize her thoughts. “We figure it out. No more lies, no more excuses. We take it one step at a time.” You nodded, your expression softening. “I can do that. One step at a time.”

Natasha felt a strange sense of relief at your words. This was new territory for both of you, but at least you didn’t have to navigate it alone. You had each other, and while it was still a complicated mess, it was something you could rely on. As you both got out of bed and began to dress, the weight of your new reality settled over you. This wasn’t going to be easy, but you were in it together, and for now, that was enough.

“Hey, Natasha?” you said as you pulled your shirt over your head. “Yeah?”

You paused for a moment, your expression thoughtful. “I know this isn’t what either of us expected, but..I’m glad we’re here." Natasha smiled, a warm feeling spreading through her chest. “Me too, Y/n. Me too.”

As you left the room and stepped back into the world, you did so with a new understanding of each other. You had started as reluctant partners, forced together by a mission, but now…now there was something more. Something worth exploring, even if it was still messy and confusing. The mission had brought you together, but it was your shared experiences and growing bond that would keep you together. And as you walked side by side, ready to face whatever came next, you both knew that this was only the beginning of something new.

[kleopatra45]

Asteroid Pallas (2)

Asteroid Pallas (2) in astrology symbolizes strategic intelligence, problem-solving skills, and wisdom. Its placement in a birth chart indicates how one approaches challenges with foresight and analytical thinking. Pallas represents the ability to devise effective plans, negotiate, and find creative solutions. Understanding Pallas' position provides insights into one's strategic strengths, decision-making style, and leadership potential in various areas of life.

Pallas in the Houses

Pallas in the 1st House: This placement suggests that strategic thinking and problem-solving are integral to your identity and self-expression. You may approach life with a sense of strategy and foresight, and others may see you as someone who is wise and insightful. Pallas in the 2nd House: Values, resources, and personal possessions are important themes in your strategic approach. You may apply your intelligence and problem-solving skills to financial matters or to enhance your sense of security and stability. Pallas in the 3rd House: Communication, learning, and intellectual pursuits are emphasized in your strategic thinking. You may excel in fields that require logical analysis and clear communication. Siblings and neighbors may play a role in your strategic plans. Pallas in the 4th House: Family, home, and emotional security are central to your strategic approach. You may apply your intelligence to create a harmonious home environment or to resolve family conflicts. Real estate and property matters may interest you strategically. Pallas in the 5th House: Creativity, self-expression, and children (if applicable) are emphasized in your strategic endeavors. You may approach creative projects or hobbies with a sense of planning and purpose. Romantic relationships may involve strategic thinking and problem-solving. Pallas in the 6th House: Service, routines, and health are integral to your strategic approach. You may excel in organizing and optimizing daily tasks or in fields related to health and well-being. Your work environment may benefit from your strategic insights. Pallas in the 7th House: Partnerships, relationships, and collaborations are key areas of strategic focus for you. You may excel in negotiating and finding solutions that benefit both parties. Legal matters and contracts may interest you strategically. Pallas in the 8th House: Intimacy, shared resources, and transformation play significant roles in your strategic thinking. You may apply your intelligence to delve into deep psychological insights or to manage shared financial matters effectively. Crisis management may be an area of strength. Pallas in the 9th House: Philosophy, beliefs, and higher learning influence your strategic approach. You may excel in fields related to teaching, law, or philosophy, where strategic thinking and broad perspectives are valued. Travel and cultural exchanges may interest you strategically. Pallas in the 10th House: Career, public image, and achievements are important in how you express strategic qualities. You may apply your intelligence to leadership roles, long-term goals, or projects that enhance your professional reputation. Strategic planning may drive your career success. Pallas in the 11th House: Friendships, groups, and social causes are emphasized in your strategic endeavors. You may excel in organizing collective efforts, advocating for social justice, or leading community initiatives. Networking may be a strategic strength. Pallas in the 12th House: Spirituality, hidden strengths, and unconscious patterns influence your strategic thinking. You may apply your intelligence to explore metaphysical realms, psychoanalysis, or charitable endeavors behind the scenes. Healing and spiritual growth may be strategic goals.

Pallas in the Signs

Aries: Pallas in Aries strategizes with courage, initiative, and independence. You approach challenges with a direct and assertive style, often pioneering new paths and solutions. Taurus: Pallas in Taurus strategizes with patience, persistence, and practicality. You excel in planning for long-term stability and security, applying a methodical approach to achieve tangible results. Gemini: Pallas in Gemini strategizes with versatility, curiosity, and adaptability. You thrive on gathering information, brainstorming ideas, and finding innovative solutions through communication and networking. Cancer: Pallas in Cancer strategizes with empathy, intuition, and nurturing care. You excel in understanding emotional dynamics, nurturing relationships, and creating secure foundations for growth. Leo: Pallas in Leo strategizes with creativity, confidence, and leadership. You approach challenges with a bold and charismatic style, focusing on inspiring others and achieving recognition. Virgo: Pallas in Virgo strategizes with precision, analysis, and practical problem-solving. You excel in detail-oriented planning, organization, and implementing efficient strategies for improvement. Libra: Pallas in Libra strategizes with diplomacy, balance, and fairness. You excel in negotiating agreements, promoting harmony, and finding win-win solutions in partnerships and collaborations. Scorpio: Pallas in Scorpio strategizes with depth, insight, and transformative power. You approach challenges with strategic intensity, delving into hidden truths and leveraging psychological insights. Sagittarius: Pallas in Sagittarius strategizes with optimism, exploration, and philosophical insight. You excel in strategic planning that broadens horizons, promotes growth, and aligns with ethical principles. Capricorn: Pallas in Capricorn strategizes with ambition, discipline, and long-term vision. You excel in strategic planning that emphasizes responsibility, achievement, and building enduring structures. Aquarius: Pallas in Aquarius strategizes with innovation, humanitarianism, and progressive thinking. You excel in strategic planning that fosters social change, embraces diversity, and promotes collective goals. Pisces: Pallas in Pisces strategizes with compassion, imagination, and spiritual insight. You approach challenges with a strategic focus on healing, creativity, and transcending boundaries.

Pallas in Aspects

Conjunctions: A conjunction of Pallas with another planet intensifies the influence of that planet on your strategic thinking and problem-solving abilities. For example, Pallas conjunct Mercury emphasizes strategic thinking in communication and decision-making, while Pallas conjunct Mars highlights strategic actions and assertiveness. Sextiles and Trines: These harmonious aspects indicate ease and support in integrating the energies of Pallas and the other planet involved. For example, Pallas sextile Venus suggests strategic planning that enhances relationships and creative pursuits, while Pallas trine Jupiter indicates strategic growth and expansion through optimism and opportunity. Squares and Oppositions: These challenging aspects can indicate tension or conflict that needs to be addressed in strategic planning and problem-solving. For example, Pallas square Saturn might indicate challenges in implementing long-term strategies or facing limitations, while Pallas opposition Uranus could highlight a need to balance innovative thinking with practical considerations.

©️kleopatra45

[sugar-grigri]

Denji no longer has access to his heart

The golden rule in Chainsaw Man is to focus on the title, since it's the key to reading the story.

Rain, Brothel, Removal seem to be three absurdly unrelated elements, and Fujimoto likes to put it that way, because the challenge for the reader is to find a way of reading that links them together.

This chapter is funny as well as disturbing, deeply sad, and in itself this collection of sensations just makes you uncomfortable, since the tone is always reversed, and the protagonist himself refuses to allow his situation to be a comic spring.

Fujimoto confirms an interpretation that is fundamental to understanding Denji: his character thinks only in terms of short-term objectives, incapable of projecting himself, just as he responds only to the satisfaction of needs without being able to verbalize and think about his unhappiness in a more abstract way.

Denji, for example, isn't thinking about whether sex is actually a solution to his problems, no, it's more concrete than that: he's thinking about whether he's masturbated recently.

Another piece of evidence is the rain. I've always thought that when it rains in Fujimoto's works, it's proof that no lies are being told.

Whether in Look Back with a silent victory, the school moment with Reze and Denji.

But that's not what we're interested in here, because there's no doubt that Denji is sincere, or at least the rain only shows us that he's sincerely desperate.

There's a subtlety....

Denji complains that he only thinks with his dick, but there's another, more philosophical and certainly less funny idea behind this: Denji only thinks through his body.

The rain, the amputation, the brothel - they're all proof that Denji only thinks with his senses.

Denji thought the brothel was the solution to his distress, it's when it started raining that he collapsed, as if the change in weather had evoked his own emotional change. Yoru's solution is amputation, another physical sensation and solution.

Amputation is a solution all the more symbolic because it's antithetical to what Denji is: a demon man capable of regeneration.

To amputate is in itself not to regenerate, and not to regenerate is in itself to be more human.

What distinguishes us from animals (although science relativizes this) is the way we think about our own emotions, something Denji is incapable of doing, or at least has great difficulty in doing.

This doesn't mean he can't verbalize it at all, but when he evokes, he evokes a sensation, a dish (a shitty hamburger, a steak, a ton of sex).

Even when he wants to be loved, Denji formulates it in the form of wanting his heart, almost organically.

No one wants Denji's heart because it's gone

And it makes sense, because Pochita has reassembled his entire body, except for Denji's heart, which has literally been left in that garbage can.

That's why, when Pochita lets Denji access his feelings, the place is symbolized by a garbage can.

When Denji asks Pochita to wake up to find Nayuta, Pochita asks him where his legs are, because Denji's only function is to be a body.

And now everything makes sense again

When Denji spoke his dream to Pochita, being Chainsaw Man, I think there was a certain feeling in every reader: what exactly does it change?

What if it changes nothing? It's normal for Denji not to be able to project himself in the long term, as he should symbolically listen to his heart.

Denji's inability to have a dream, a goal for the future, is symbolized by him and Pochita as children.

It doesn't mean that Pochita is an antagonist (although that could be cool), but that Denji and Pochita are prisoners of their own situations.

Denji doesn't have access to his heart, but Pochita is contractually bound to what Denji wants.

This is also why, when Denji reproaches himself, it's his child self who's addressing him, because the only way to reproach himself, to feel guilty, is symbolized by his old self, the Denji that Pochita may have known. Just as Denji doesn't have access to his heart, Pochita has difficulty gaining access to the person Denji has become, all of which only leads to stagnation.

Denji as a child is also the symbol of a scumbag, the remnant of a lost heart, always dressed in poor, dirty clothes, a past that Denji seeks to escape, but a past that is the only time Pochita has been able to get to know Denji.

I know it's a pretty crazy line, but it's precisely because Denji is Chainsaw Man - a being both fused and disconnected - that he thinks with his dick lol

Saving Chainsaw Man by killing Chainsaw Man has never been a truer statement

Chainsaw Man is Denji's prison but also his only hope

A cage

[thechekhov]

Hello! I'm a big fan of your work. I wanted to ask for advice / thoughts about an art problem I've been struggling with that you seem to have at least some sort of solution for?

So basically I'm an animator and digital artist (hobbyist), and I'm constantly coming up with new ideas for things to make. Only problem is that most of these ideas would take up to or longer than 2 months to make because, yknow, animation isn't quick, especially if you want to take your time to make it good. But with so many ideas that all take so long to complete, I often find myself tied and frozen as I can't decide what's most worthwhile to start first. I passionately want to complete all these projects, but my inspiration for each one waxes and wanes in a way I can't control, and I've just been stuck for several months. You juggle a lot of projects- not all of them art, but it still seems applicable here. This is excluding other life responsibilities like work and stuff, I don't have problems with getting that stuff done. This is purely within my creative hobby.

If u can't say anything thats fine I'm just curious- You have a massive output with great quality. Thank you!

This is a very kind message, and one that humbles me a lot, because although I'd love to bestow upon you some sort of advice that might help, or give words of wisdom..............I feel like that would be fake of me because

I also suffer from this very same thing

That is to say, this part of your message:

my inspiration for each one waxes and wanes in a way I can't control

It rings true for me too! I think it might ring true for many others as well.

There are stories in my head all the time. There are stories, and concepts, and IDEAS and they are all so shiny and new in the beginning, and then they slowly peter out and, since I frequently don't have time to do anything about them, they fade into the background.

I have enough trouble with this in terms of COMICS (also a lengthy medium, though less so than animation, which, OOF, you have my condolences, you are stronger than I) that I have started to just come to terms with the fact that some things are not meant to be.

Which is, I think, one of the small bits of advice I can give.

1. Some things may just be ideas, and that's okay.

I think one of the best ways that I've learned to deal with Idea-Death is making it count towards something in the future. That is to say, using them as compost.

In order for this to work, you have to actively put your ideas into the compost pin instead of the trash. That means maybe investing in either a notebook, or a sketchbook, OR just a discord server for yourself where you organize ideas and dump them all into a channel to scroll back through later.

It may seem useless at first, but honestly, it can be satisfying to PUT them somewhere instead of letting them fade away.

Plus, you may one day scroll through them and rediscover an idea at just the right time. OR you may be inspired to take parts of an old idea and repurpose it for a new idea that you DO have motivation for.

However, there's also this part, right?

I've just been stuck for several months

I.......feel this. Sometimes I, too, feel stuck for several months. There are times when even if I WANT to work on something, I just don't have the time. It takes too long to finish!

.........which is why I recommend the following:

2. Don't finish. Just start.

Now, this is the toughie. I can't exactly say that it would work for everyone. But I have learned that I am WAY more likely to return to a project and work on it again sometime in the future if I actually DO something for it the first time I get inspired.

I have SO MANY things that I have not published in my folders. I have sketches of gifs that are 10 frames long. I have concept art sketches boldly labeled with project names that will likely never get off the ground. I have Googledoc files with summary and plot outlines for stories I'll probably never write. I have discord channels with random ass concepts and a few sketches for characters.

And what I have found is that if I just WORK on these ideas when I feel like it, they are more likely to survive, even if they don't thrive right away.

I'm also a huge proponent of Procrastination Rotation.

That is to say, I have so many projects I COULD be working on, that if I ever feel frustrated or stuck on one thing, I just shift myself slightly to the left and do another thing instead. I almost never force myself to work through a block (save for a few money-motivated deadlines) just to complete a thing.

Stuck on a comic? I'll go write a few lines of fic. Unsatisfied with where the fic is going?

I'll go sketch out an illustration. Incapable of finishing an illustration?

I'll go google some references for another comic project and slap them all into an image file for later, so that I have SOMETHING in place for when I want to do studies.

And so on and so forth.

I have comic ideas, and comic sketches, and 30+ pages of original comics sketched. I don't know if they'll make it. It would take a lot of work.

But it also takes very little work - just a few extra pages sketched while I'm bored for an hour. Or a bit of lineart while I listen to a podcast. Or just a doodle somewhere which I snap a pic of and add to my discord channel for that project.

Will it work for everyone? Probably not. But I think that our creative culture is sometimes too attached to a linear production style. The truth is that art, or illustrations, or animation, or comics - none of it has to be on an assembly line. It can be tinkered with and put aside. And then, maybe, picked apart for scraps.........or maybe made into something new!

I don't know if that helps you at all, but I hope it at least helps someone.

And good luck with your animating!

[imustbenuts]

theres a few ??? thing going on in trigun stampede that's explicitly japanese/sino-ish in culture but im entirely not sure what to make of it. 3 things.

Knives' birthname being settled as Kni/Nai,

JuLai's emblem symbolism,

and the Buddha Thread??? thing in ep 11 10

Knives' birthname is Kni and hm! ...無い?

this is specifically a stampede thing. nightow didnt give him this Kni name in his work, so i can only chalk this up to the stampede staff's deliberate decision. if you render it into japanese, it'd be Nai, and the immediate word i can think of is... 無い. meaning, Nothing, or Without.

it fits rather well considering stampede has officially placed an emphasis on his obsessive love towards his brother on his bio on their official site:

my TL:

Vash's twin brother. Possesses a cold and merciless personality. Filled with a hatred for humans, he masterminds an organization with a plan to massacre the entire human species. With abilities beyond human understanding, he has the power to destroy entire planets. He greatly loves his only younger twin brother, Vash to an obsessive degree.

interestingly, the word used for the obsessive love here specifically is 執着 shuuchaku, which has roots/association with the word Abhinivesha. from what i understand it is a mental state, a fear of death, and a desperation to cling onto life so much one becomes ignorant and causes their own suffering. and ignorance is another big core of what makes Knives' character tick.

so i feel like this has some pointers towards Knives, or even child Kni being nothing without his younger brother. (or it could just be a simpler play on the word naive lmao)

meanwhile for Vash there's not really anything japanese that jumps out at me, but some have pointed out his name sounds like the french word Vashe, used for female cattle. extremely passive and born for consumption and theres a lot to dissect in that direction but im not going there! his name is Knife and his brother is a cattle there's catholicism may your brain go brr.

theres more to the nothingness concept in buddhism that doesnt put it squarely in a negative category but lets talk about buddhism later. next:

JuLai's emblem

stared at this for a few seconds and yelled fuck me. this represents the twins, AND its the broken yin yang symbol:

:). hey look at that female thing popping up again--

Knives is evidently the light Yang, and Vash is the dark Yin. ngl this daoist thing is somewhat sexist but lets brush that over 2 thousand year old aspect aside for this post. for stampede's case we can clearly see what theming is going on especially for those in the know of the original work.

Knives is hella assertive to the point of echoing fascist eugenics nonsense, and Vash has that nurturing instinct that seems to pop in whenever there's a human child or people who needs help.

interestingly the planet No Man's Land has too much fugging sun and is too hostile for human life. to survive people have to live in the shade and turn to plants for counters to the harsh, hot celestial sun. so here if Knives is being the sun, hes also being hostile to human life, and meanwhile the feminine looking plants and Vash's personality plus actions are the only thing giving these people at chance at life. (also vash has the power of Dark Matter or something)

obviously, just like JuLai's broken symbol, the balance is completely and utterly out of whack. in daoism a broken balance is thought to cause a lot of suffering. in the finale, Vash doesnt have a single speck of white on him, and Knives doesn't have a single speck of black. this means there isn't a balance and they cant come to an agreement at all.

im gonna also point out here that vash's idea of co-existence even if accepted wouldnt be a permanent solution due to the dependents having limited lifespan. so through this lens, stampede seems to be saying that neither twin's ideas are really effective long term solution, tho Knives is completely unacceptable due to obvious genocidal reasons.

Buddha Thread

studio orange whaaat are you guys cooking over there... ok so. in ep 11, Knives drops Vash into the uhhh The Hell Pool, and Vash tries to get out of it with his wire and hangs for a bit. then we get a scene like this:

Knives proceeds to cut Vash's thread and he drops into The Hell Pool. and then the metaphorical SA scene happens.

i call it Buddha Thread but this can also be known as The Spider's Thread. there exists a story of The Spider's Thread that's very Japanese-Buddhist and well known over there.

the gist of this story is that Buddha lowers a single spider thread to a sinner in the deepest hell as a lifeline to get out, bc this heavy sinner had done a singular good deed of saving a spider he was about to crush with his foot. however, the thread is broken as a result of the sinner's selfishness yelling for the other sinners below him to let go, claiming this thread was his and his alone. the sinner having climbed halfway upwards the thread after great effort plunges back into the pits of hell. buddha having watched all of this reacts with sadness, and the days in paradise carry on as per usual.

and. digest that for a second. and then refer back to Knives and The Fall and this scene that plays later, when Vash's mind wipe begins proper:

fuck. me. knives is framed as a self proclaimed god in the loudest ways on multiple levels.

while these 3 aspect i just broke down explaining do not exist at least overtly in the original trigun, i thought it would be interesting to chew on in light of the overwhelming catholicism existing in the story.

there's some themes im also picking up from the original trigun that might be rooted in either buddhsim or japanese culture such as: the undeniable truth that yearning and hunger is part of the human living experience and to deny it is to deny living. but im not sure what to make of it bc A) not explicitly framed or explored as a buddhsim/japanese idea thing and B) catholicsm obv is the overwhelming theme of the entire work

idk what the heck studio orange is cooking exactly but. hm.

[sapphic-scylla]

A lot of people resonated with a post I made a long time ago about lesser known ADHD symptoms and I figured I would post more of them because more people need to be aware about how much of a debilitation ADHD is:

Rejection sensitivity. It hurts a lot more than you think for us to be told that something we like is not cool or our plans were turned down by someone.

Often, a lot of times, ADHD people feel out of place and it causes us to just want to leave social situations or discord servers or friend groups. It’s not our fault, we just feel like no one wants us there or that we’re too much to handle.

Wild Behavior Swings. Messy room to pinnacle of cleanliness. Late as hell to 20 minutes early. Perfectly organized to couldn’t care less. It’s a coin flip and we hate it more than you do.

Talking out loud. Less a symptom and more a solution. It helps us stay on track because when your brain moves as spastically as ours does, it pays to say things out loud.

Random errors in writing and spelling. Your brain is spinning at Mach three. You’re bound to forget words and letters at that speed.

Horrifyingly inconsistent short and long-term memory. My inability to remember things and conversations has literally destroyed relationships.

Window Shopper’s Attachment. Seeing something and NEEDING to buy it or it’s going to bug you for the next five years whether you have the money or not.

Social anxiety. I may have mentioned this, but when you are constantly overthinking everything, every interaction can be an uphill battle and it just gets worse if you’re an introvert.

[hrishcha]

Made an iterator sona :) A quiet and anxious one, avoids group elder as she doesn't perform to her highest standards and doing so strains her systems badly — either an overlooked failure during creation or gained over time wear. Still possesses incredible computing and memory capacity, but won't outperform her neighbouring iterators despite being newer generation.

She's not fond of their purpose and doesn't do much steps towards achieving it; most likely believes that ancients' philosophy is not applicable to less intelligent creatures, although thinks that by the time iterators will be long gone and new possible civilization arises, those beings might also wish to ascend, but it must happen on their own terms. Instead of looking for the solution, prefers observing the nature through her overseers, but does not wish to have any creatures within her can and gets noticeably frustrated and nervous if anything finds its way inside. At some point became good friends with iterators far outside of her local group, but when the communication arrays deteriorated and went out of service, she lost contact with them. To this day occasionally runs simulations of their imaginative conversations to entertain herself. Loves her personal collection of pearls and secretly wishes to obtain more, but doesn't dare to reach out into outer world even with purposed organisms. Messing with her data pearls will severely anger and unsettle her. Do not touch the pearls

Her name shall be… Questions Silently? Not fully satisfied with it for now but maybe I'll come up with something better we'll see + some details :)

[literatureloverx]

BSD MEN AND MBTI TYPES [+ their darlings]

So, I’m not sure how many are aware of what MBTI is, but I got a few requests on making an analysis about this for BSD MEN and incorporating their ideal type! darlings’ MBTI types as well, so I did. (I kind of promised that I would do it, so now is the time.)❤️

I want you to know, it wasn’t intentional to place one type as the ideal match for multiple characters. I thought it through thoroughly and did my best to remain as logical and diverse in MBTI types as possible. It’s just that strong Fe users are often a good match for broken people and…well…BSD men are mostly broken.

Here is a brief explanation what MBTI and cognitive functions are, for those who are not familiar with it. If you are familiar with it, you can simply skip to the next paragraph under the thinner cut.❤️

Explanation MBTI: The Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) is a tool used to understand different personality types based on how people prefer to interact with the world and make decisions. Created by Isabel Briggs Myers and Katharine Cook Briggs, it’s based on ideas from Carl Jung about how people think and behave. MBTI types are 16 four-letter combinations such as INFP or ESTP, that are designed with each 4 primary cognitive functions that are being used frequently by each person. There are 8 cognitive functions, and we all use all of them, however, 4 are always the most comfortable and prominent.

Detailed Explanation of Cognitive Functions: Cognitive functions are specific mental processes that shape how we understand and interact with the world. Each function has a particular role and works in conjunction with others to influence personality. Here’s a closer look at each of the eight cognitive functions:

1. Extraverted Sensing (Se): This function involves focusing on the present moment and taking in information through the senses. People who rely on Se are very aware of their surroundings and enjoy engaging with their environment actively. They tend to live in the moment and respond to immediate sensory experiences.

2. Introverted Sensing (Si): Si involves recalling past experiences and using that information to understand the present. People with strong Si focus on details and how things have been done before. They rely on their memories and internal impressions to make sense of the world.

3. Extraverted Intuition (Ne): Ne is about exploring possibilities and seeing connections between different ideas. Those who use Ne are good at brainstorming and considering multiple potential outcomes. They enjoy thinking about future possibilities and spotting patterns that aren’t immediately obvious.

4. Introverted Intuition (Ni): Ni involves forming insights and understanding future implications based on internal reflections. People with dominant Ni often have a clear vision of how things might unfold and focus on long-term outcomes and deep, conceptual understandings.

5. Extraverted Thinking (Te): This function focuses on organizing and structuring the external world based on logic and efficiency. People who use Te prioritize objective criteria and practical solutions, often seeking to improve systems and achieve measurable results.

6. Introverted Thinking (Ti): Ti involves analyzing and refining ideas based on internal logic. Individuals with strong Ti prefer to understand concepts deeply and develop their own internal frameworks for how things should work. They value precision and consistency in their thoughts.

7. Extraverted Feeling (Fe): Fe is concerned with understanding and responding to the emotions and needs of others. People with strong Fe are focused on creating harmony in their social environments and are sensitive to the feelings of those around them. They often work to ensure that everyone’s needs are met and that social interactions are smooth.

8. Introverted Feeling (Fi): Fi involves making decisions based on personal values and internal emotional responses. Those with dominant Fi focus on staying true to their own principles and beliefs. They prioritize authenticity and personal integrity, making choices that align with their internal values.

Each MBTI personality type has a specific hierarchy of these functions. The dominant function is the primary way a person interacts with the world, while the auxiliary function supports it. The tertiary function is less developed, and the inferior function is the least developed and often a source of stress or growth.

FYODOR DOSTOEVSKY

INTJ (The Mastermind/Architect) - Ni > Te > Fi > Se

Fyodor's dominant function, Introverted Intuition (Ni), reveals itself in his visionary, long-term thinking and his deep strategic foresight. Fyodor operates on a plane that transcends the immediate and the obvious.

He sees patterns, connections, and the potential outcomes of his actions far into the future, often perceiving the world in ways that others simply cannot comprehend.

His overarching goal—to cleanse humanity of its sins—demonstrates a profound understanding of abstract concepts and an almost prophetic ability to see beyond the present, traits quintessential to a dominant Ni user.

Next, we have Extroverted Thinking (Te), Fyodor's auxiliary function, which he employs with ruthless efficiency. His actions are driven by a need to impose order and structure on the chaotic world around him, aligning perfectly with Te's desire for effectiveness and productivity.

Fyodor’s methods, while morally ambiguous, are meticulously planned and executed with precision. This function supports his Ni visions, allowing him to implement his grand schemes with logical, calculated steps.

His ability to manipulate people and situations to his advantage is a direct result of Te’s influence, prioritizing objective outcomes over personal feelings.

His tertiary function, Introverted Feeling (Fi), is less overt but still crucial to understanding his character.

While Fyodor presents a cold, calculating exterior, his actions are ultimately guided by an internal value system—no matter how warped it might seem.

Fyodor's Fi manifests in his unwavering belief in his mission and his disdain for those who fail to meet his moral standards. He perceives himself as a savior of humanity, driven by an intrinsic sense of right and wrong that only he truly understands.

This Fi also explains why Fyodor is so selective about who he allows into his inner world. A potential darling, for instance, would need to align with his deeply held values, reinforcing the notion that Fyodor’s emotional connections are reserved for those who resonate with his internal compass.

Lastly, Fyodor’s inferior function, Extroverted Sensing (Se), is the least developed, manifesting in his apparent disconnection from the physical world.

Unlike characters who thrive on sensory experiences, Fyodor often appears aloof and detached from his surroundings. His focus on abstract ideas over tangible realities suggests a discomfort with Se.

He surrounds himself with serene and controlled environments—places where sensory overload is minimized, and he can concentrate on his internal visions. This discomfort with the physical world further isolates him, reinforcing his preference for solitude and reflection.

In conclusion, Fyodor embodies the traits of an INTJ through his dominant Ni, which allows him to see far-reaching possibilities and plan accordingly; his auxiliary Te, which drives his strategic actions and manipulations; his tertiary Fi, which shapes his personal values and judgments; and his inferior Se, which leads to a disconnect from the immediate physical world.

These cognitive functions, taken together, explain his complex and morally ambiguous character, as well as his potential preferences in a partner—someone who would understand and complement his internal world without disrupting the carefully constructed order he seeks to maintain.

His darling: INFP - Fi > Ne > Si > Te

or INFJ - Ni > Fe > Ti > Se

INFP (The Mediator / Idealist):

In the intricate labyrinth of Fyodor’s mind, where Introverted Intuition (Ni) reigns supreme (this sounds so serious lmao), an INFP female darling would offer an unparalleled balance and harmony.

Her dominant function, Introverted Feeling (Fi), would resonate deeply with Fyodor's own Fi, albeit in a more developed and nuanced form.

While Fyodor’s Fi is selective, almost reclusive, it is this very selectiveness that makes an INFP’s Fi the perfect match. She possesses an intrinsic moral compass, one that is authentic and unwavering, but unlike Fyodor’s, it is deeply empathetic.

Her Fi would draw out the softer, more vulnerable aspects of his tertiary Fi, helping to humanize the rigid internal values that guide his every move.

The INFP’s Extroverted Intuition (Ne), her auxiliary function, would offer Fyodor something he might not even realize he craves—a partner who can perceive multiple possibilities and ideas without being constrained by rigid logic or efficiency.

Her Ne would inject a sense of wonder and exploration into Fyodor’s meticulously controlled world. Unlike the ruthless precision of his Te, her Ne is imaginative, often seeing potential in areas Fyodor’s Ni might overlook (seriously, this man would NEVER overlook anything but let’s stick to that for the narrative).

This openness to possibility would challenge Fyodor, gently encouraging him to see beyond his single-minded visions, adding layers of depth to his already profound insights.

Furthermore, the INFP’s Introverted Sensing (Si) as a tertiary function would provide a subtle, yet grounding influence on Fyodor.

While Fyodor’s inferior Se leaves him disconnected from the physical world, the INFP’s Si, though not dominant, would allow her to appreciate the simple, sensory experiences of life.

She could offer Fyodor a gentle introduction to these experiences, helping him connect, even briefly, with the present moment. Her Si would serve as a quiet anchor, providing stability without overwhelming his discomfort with Se.

Lastly, her Extroverted Thinking (Te) as an inferior function would ensure that while she respects Fyodor’s logical and structured approach, she would not challenge his authority or disrupt the order he values so highly. Instead, her Te would emerge in moments when practicality is required, complementing Fyodor’s own Te without competing with it.

This would create a dynamic where she supports his strategies and plans, but with a gentle touch that allows his Te to dominate, thus preserving the balance of power in the relationship.

In conclusion, an INFP female darling would not only complement Fyodor’s complex INTJ personality but would also provide a much-needed counterbalance to his intensity.

Her Fi would resonate with his, but with a warmth and empathy that could soften his cold, calculating exterior. Her Ne would challenge and expand his Ni, offering new perspectives and possibilities.

Her Si would ground him, even if only slightly, in the present moment, while her inferior Te would respect and subtly support his strategic dominance.

Together, they would form a partnership where his visionary goals are met with understanding, warmth, and a touch of whimsy—qualities that, in the end, may be precisely what Fyodor needs, even if he cannot fully articulate it.

INFJ (The Advocate/Counselor):

An INFJ female darling would be the second-best match for Fyodor, harmonizing with his complex, enigmatic nature while still offering a dynamic that enriches his inner world.

As an INFJ, her dominant function, Introverted Intuition (Ni), aligns perfectly with Fyodor's own Ni, creating a profound connection rooted in their shared ability to perceive the world through abstract, visionary lenses.

This mutual understanding of the intangible and the hidden would foster a relationship where both partners feel deeply understood, even in their most esoteric thoughts. Fyodor, who often finds himself isolated in his strategic foresight, would find in the INFJ a partner who not only comprehends but complements his intuitive depth.

Her Extroverted Feeling (Fe) as an auxiliary function introduces a crucial element of emotional intelligence that Fyodor lacks. While Fyodor’s tertiary Introverted Feeling (Fi) shapes his internal value system, it is often cold, detached, and selectively applied.

The INFJ’s Fe, however, is outwardly focused, naturally attuned to the emotions and needs of others. This function would provide Fyodor with a compassionate, empathetic counterpart who can navigate social dynamics and offer a broader perspective on human emotions—something his Te might dismiss as irrelevant.

The INFJ's Fe would soften Fyodor’s rigid moral judgments, gently encouraging him to consider the emotional consequences of his actions, thereby broadening his understanding of the world beyond his own internal values.

Moreover, the INFJ's Introverted Thinking (Ti), her tertiary function, would subtly complement Fyodor's auxiliary Te. While her Ti is less overt, it allows her to engage in deep, reflective thinking, often uncovering logical inconsistencies or hidden truths in complex situations.

Her Ti would not threaten his Te-driven need for control and order but would instead offer a nuanced, thoughtful perspective that Fyodor could appreciate, particularly when his Ni-driven visions require careful refinement.

This quiet analytical ability would appeal to Fyodor's Te, creating moments of intellectual synergy where both can engage in strategic planning and problem-solving.

Lastly, the INFJ's Extroverted Sensing (Se) as an inferior function mirrors Fyodor's own inferior Se, establishing a shared discomfort with the immediate, sensory world.

This mutual weakness might initially seem like a drawback, but it would actually deepen their bond. Both partners would understand and respect each other's preference for controlled, serene environments, where they can retreat from the overwhelming demands of the physical world.

Their shared Se would reinforce their tendency towards introspection and visionary thinking, ensuring that their relationship remains focused on the abstract, the intellectual, and the strategic.

In conclusion, an INFJ female darling offers Fyodor a harmonious blend of shared intuitive depth and complementary emotional intelligence.

Her Ni resonates with his, creating a deep, almost mystical connection, while her Fe introduces warmth and empathy into his otherwise cold, calculated world.

Her Ti supports and refines his Te-driven plans without challenging his authority, and their shared inferior Se creates a mutual understanding of their need for isolation from the sensory overload of the external world.

While an INFP might provide a softer, more whimsical counterbalance, the INFJ offers a partnership rooted in shared vision and mutual understanding, making her the second-best match for Fyodor's complex, INTJ personality.

DAZAI OSAMU

ENTP (The Debater / Visionary) - Ne > Ti > Fe > Si

Dazai’s dominant function, Extraverted Intuition (Ne), reveals itself in his constant exploration of possibilities and his ability to see multiple angles in any situation.

Dazai operates in a world of endless potential, always considering what could be rather than what is. This makes him unpredictable and difficult to pin down, as he is always a step ahead, contemplating outcomes and scenarios that others might overlook.

His strategic brilliance is a direct result of his Ne, allowing him to manipulate events and people with a creativity that is unmatched.

Dazai’s love for chaos and his playful, almost mischievous nature also stem from this dominant function, as he thrives in environments where he can test boundaries and explore new ideas.

Next, we have Introverted Thinking (Ti), Dazai’s auxiliary function, which he uses to analyze situations with a cold, logical precision.

Ti drives Dazai to understand the underlying mechanics of the world around him, breaking down complex problems into their fundamental components. This function is what gives Dazai his sharp, analytical mind, allowing him to devise intricate plans and see through the facades of others.

His Ti also explains his philosophical musings and existential questioning, as he is constantly trying to make sense of the world and his place in it. Despite his often lighthearted demeanor, there is a deeply intellectual side to Dazai that is always at work, dissecting and evaluating everything he encounters.

His tertiary function, Extraverted Feeling (Fe), is less prominent but still plays a crucial role in how Dazai interacts with others. While he often comes across as detached, Dazai is acutely aware of social dynamics and the emotions of those around him.

He uses this awareness to his advantage, charming or manipulating others as the situation requires. Fe allows Dazai to adapt to different social environments effortlessly, making him a social chameleon who can navigate complex interpersonal relationships with ease.

However, this function also reveals a more manipulative side to Dazai, as he tends to use his understanding of emotions not to connect with others, but to influence and control them.

Lastly, Dazai’s inferior function, Introverted Sensing (Si), is the least developed, manifesting in his apparent disconnection from tradition and the past.

Unlike characters who draw strength from their memories or rely on established routines, Dazai is often seen rejecting or ignoring these aspects of life.

His Si deficiency is evident in his restless nature and his constant search for new experiences, as he struggles to find meaning or stability in what has already been.

This disconnect from Si also contributes to his existential despair, as he finds it difficult to ground himself in any lasting sense of identity or purpose.

In conclusion, Dazai embodies the traits of an ENTP through his dominant Ne, which fuels his endless curiosity and strategic foresight; his auxiliary Ti, which sharpens his analytical thinking; his tertiary Fe, which he uses to navigate and manipulate social interactions; and his inferior Si, which leads to a sense of disconnection from tradition and the past.

These cognitive functions, taken together, explain his complex and often contradictory character, as well as his tendency to oscillate between playful banter and deep existential reflection.

His darling: INFJ - Ni > Fe > Ti > Se

Or ENFJ - Fe > Ni > Se > Ti

INFJ (The Advocate/Counselor):

For Dazai, an INFJ female darling would be the ideal match, complementing and balancing his complex, multifaceted ENTP nature.

Dazai’s dominant Extraverted Intuition (Ne) thrives on possibilities, unpredictability, and the exploration of various outcomes, often leading him into chaotic and uncharted territories. An INFJ’s dominant function, Introverted Intuition (Ni), would resonate with Dazai’s Ne, but in a way that brings focus and depth to his endless curiosity.

While Dazai’s Ne scatters in multiple directions, the INFJ’s Ni would help him see the underlying patterns and deeper meaning behind his explorations, guiding his often chaotic energy into more purposeful and profound insights.

Her Ni would provide a sense of direction that Dazai’s Ne sometimes lacks, allowing them to explore the abstract and conceptual together, but with a shared vision rather than aimless wandering.

Her Extroverted Feeling (Fe) as an auxiliary function would offer a crucial emotional anchor for Dazai, whose Extraverted Feeling (Fe), while present, is often used more for manipulation than genuine connection.

The INFJ’s Fe, however, is deeply empathetic, focused on creating harmony and understanding in her relationships. This emotional intelligence would be a soothing balm to Dazai’s restless soul, providing the warmth and connection he often deflects with humor or detachment.

Her Fe would help Dazai engage with his own emotions more honestly, encouraging him to forge deeper, more meaningful relationships rather than merely skimming the surface.

This would be especially significant for Dazai, whose tertiary Fe can sometimes lead him to feel disconnected from others despite his ability to read social dynamics effortlessly.

The INFJ’s Introverted Thinking (Ti), as her tertiary function, would complement Dazai’s auxiliary Ti, creating an intellectual synergy that both would appreciate.

While Dazai uses his Ti to deconstruct the world around him with sharp, analytical precision, the INFJ’s Ti would offer a quieter, more introspective form of analysis.

Her Ti would challenge Dazai’s sometimes impulsive leaps of logic, encouraging him to consider the ethical and philosophical implications of his actions more deeply. Together, their combined Ti would lead to rich, intellectual conversations, where they can explore complex ideas and theories, each offering a perspective that sharpens the other’s understanding.

Lastly, the INFJ’s Extroverted Sensing (Se), though her inferior function, would mirror Dazai’s own inferior Introverted Sensing (Si) in a way that fosters mutual understanding and growth.

Both struggle with staying grounded in the present moment and often feel disconnected from the physical world or their own past.

However, this shared deficiency would allow them to support one another, finding solace in their mutual discomfort.

The INFJ’s Se might encourage Dazai to occasionally step out of his head and experience the world more fully, while Dazai’s Ne could help the INFJ see the potential beyond what is immediately tangible.

Together, they would create a partnership that balances the abstract with the concrete, allowing them to explore both the potential of the future and the reality of the present.

In conclusion, an INFJ female darling would not only complement Dazai’s ENTP nature but also provide the emotional depth, intellectual stimulation, and intuitive insight that he often seeks but struggles to find.

Her Ni would bring focus to his Ne, her Fe would offer genuine emotional connection where his Fe might falter, her Ti would refine his analytical thinking, and their shared challenges with Se and Si would foster a deep understanding of each other’s struggles.

This relationship would offer Dazai a rare blend of intellectual challenge and emotional support, making the INFJ the best possible partner for his complex and often contradictory character.

ENFJ (The Protagonist / Teacher):

An ENFJ female darling would be the second-best match for Dazai Osamu, providing a relationship dynamic that complements and balances his ENTP nature in several key ways.

Dazai’s dominant Extraverted Intuition (Ne) fuels his exploration of possibilities and his knack for seeing multiple angles of any situation. An ENFJ’s dominant Extraverted Feeling (Fe) would harmonize with Dazai’s Ne, but in a manner that emphasizes emotional connection and social harmony.

The ENFJ’s Fe is adept at understanding and influencing others’ emotions, which would provide Dazai with a stabilizing force, guiding his often chaotic and unpredictable Ne through a lens of empathy and relational awareness. Her Fe would help Dazai see beyond his own intellectual pursuits and appreciate the emotional impact of his actions on those around him.

The ENFJ’s Introverted Intuition (Ni) as her auxiliary function complements Dazai’s Ne by providing depth and focus to their shared explorations.

While Dazai’s Ne leads him to constantly generate new ideas and scenarios, the ENFJ’s Ni would help in distilling these possibilities into a coherent vision. This alignment between Ne and Ni would create a synergy where their ideas are not just imaginative but also strategically meaningful.

The ENFJ’s Extraverted Sensing (Se) as her tertiary function brings a practical, immediate awareness that contrasts with Dazai’s own inferior Introverted Sensing (Si).

While Dazai often struggles with connecting to the present moment and the sensory details of life, the ENFJ’s Se would offer a grounding influence.

Her ability to engage with the external environment would provide a counterbalance to Dazai’s tendency to overlook sensory experiences and tradition. This could help Dazai become more attuned to the here-and-now, enriching his experiences and providing a more balanced perspective on life.

Finally, the ENFJ’s Introverted Thinking (Ti), her inferior function, would offer a unique intellectual counterpoint to Dazai’s dominant Ti.

While Dazai’s Ti is sharp and analytical, often used to dissect and strategize, the ENFJ’s Ti, though less developed, would bring a different flavor of logical analysis.

Her Ti would provide a thoughtful, albeit less dominant, approach to problem-solving, complementing Dazai’s more assertive analytical style. This could lead to rich, nuanced discussions where her perspective enhances his own.

In summary, an ENFJ darling would offer Dazai a blend of emotional depth, strategic insight, and practical grounding.

Her dominant Fe would foster genuine emotional connections and help Dazai consider the social and emotional ramifications of his actions.

Her Ni would add depth and direction to his Ne-driven explorations, making their intellectual pursuits more coherent.

Her Se would ground him in the present, counterbalancing his detachment from sensory experiences, while her Ti would complement and refine his analytical approaches.

Together, they would form a partnership where Dazai’s intellectual brilliance is balanced by the ENFJ’s warmth, vision, and practical insight, making her an excellent second-best match for his dynamic ENTP personality.

In conclusion, an INFJ would offer Dazai deep emotional understanding and intuitive focus, complementing his Ne with depth and introspection.

In contrast, an ENFJ would provide vibrant emotional support and practical grounding, balancing his Ne with empathy and vision while offering immediate sensory awareness.

Both types would enrich Dazai’s life, with the INFJ providing profound, intuitive insight and the ENFJ offering dynamic emotional connection and practical stability.

NAKAHARA CHUUYA

ESTP ( The Entrepreneur / Dynamo) - Se > Ti > Fe > Ni

Chuuya is a character who clearly exemplifies the ESTP personality type. His energetic demeanor, tactical mindset, and grounded approach to life can be understood through the lens of this personality type, revealing a man who thrives on action, pragmatic problem-solving, and sensory experiences.

At the forefront of Chuuya’s character is his dominant function, Extraverted Sensing (Se). This function drives Chuuya’s immediate, action-oriented approach to life. He is intensely aware of his surroundings, reacting quickly to changes and seizing opportunities as they arise.

Chuuya’s preference for hands-on engagement and his readiness to dive into action reflect his high Se, which is evident in his frequent physical confrontations and his ability to handle high-pressure situations with remarkable composure.

His keen sense of fashion is also a manifestation of his Se—his attention to stylish, elegant attire and personal presentation highlights his acute awareness of his environment and his desire to make a tangible impact on those around him.

This focus on immediate, sensory experiences underscores his reliance on Se, making him a master of adapting to and manipulating his environment in real-time.

Next is Introverted Thinking (Ti), Chuuya’s auxiliary function, which supports his strategic prowess and decision-making. While Chuuya is often seen as impulsive and driven by immediate sensations, his actions are underpinned by a logical framework that guides his responses and strategies.

His Ti helps him analyze situations with a critical eye, allowing him to understand and exploit the underlying mechanics of conflicts and challenges. This function contributes to his ability to think on his feet and devise practical solutions to complex problems, aligning with his reputation as a formidable tactician within the Port Mafia.

Extraverted Feeling (Fe), Chuuya’s tertiary function, reveals itself in his interactions with others and his capacity for emotional expression.

While Chuuya may come across as brash and direct, his Fe is evident in his concern for his allies and his desire for harmony within his sphere of influence.

His loyalty and protective nature, particularly toward those he values, highlight his underlying emotional sensitivity and his need to maintain social cohesion.

Although he may not always express his feelings openly, his actions often reflect a deep-seated desire to connect with and support those he cares about, indicating that his Fe is engaged in maintaining relationships and managing social dynamics.

Finally, Chuuya’s inferior function, Introverted Intuition (Ni), is the least developed and manifests as a disinterest or discomfort with long-term planning and abstract conceptualization.

Unlike characters who are comfortable envisioning future possibilities and intricate schemes, Chuuya is more focused on the present moment and immediate concerns.

His actions and decisions are primarily driven by the current situation rather than long-term projections, suggesting that he is less inclined to engage in deep, abstract thinking.

This disconnection from Ni is reflected in his preference for direct action over speculative or future-oriented planning.

In conclusion, Chuuya embodies the ESTP personality through his dominant Se, which drives his action-oriented and sensory-focused approach, including his keen sense of fashion; his auxiliary Ti, which supports his tactical thinking and problem-solving; his tertiary Fe, which influences his emotional interactions and loyalty; and his inferior Ni, which leads to a preference for present-focused, pragmatic decisions.

His darling: ISFJ - Si > Fe > Ti > Ne

Or ESFJ - Fe > Si > Ne >Ti

ISFJ (The Protector / Defender)

An ISFJ female darling would be the ideal match for Chuuya Nakahara, providing a harmonious balance to his dynamic ESTP personality. Her dominant Introverted Sensing (Si) would offer the grounding and stability that Chuuya, with his action-oriented and spontaneous approach to life, often lacks.

Her strong connection to tradition and the past would provide a comforting anchor for Chuuya, helping him appreciate consistency and reliability, which are sometimes overlooked in his pursuit of immediate, sensory experiences.

The ISFJ’s Extraverted Feeling (Fe) would perfectly complement Chuuya’s tertiary Fe, creating a nurturing and emotionally supportive relationship.

While Chuuya’s Fe drives him to protect and connect with those he cares about, her more developed Fe would bring warmth, compassion, and an understanding of social dynamics that could soften Chuuya’s rougher edges.

Her natural ability to maintain harmony and cater to the emotional needs of others would resonate with Chuuya’s loyalty and protectiveness, fostering a deep emotional bond based on mutual care and respect.

Her Introverted Thinking (Ti), though secondary to her Si and Fe, would align well with Chuuya’s auxiliary Ti. Both would appreciate each other’s logical approach to problem-solving and decision-making.

Her Ti would offer a calm, methodical perspective that could help Chuuya refine his strategies and think through the consequences of his actions more thoroughly, especially in situations where his impulsive nature might otherwise lead him astray.

Lastly, the ISFJ’s Extraverted Intuition (Ne), as her inferior function, would introduce a subtle yet valuable element of novelty and open-mindedness into the relationship. While her Ne is less dominant, it would still encourage Chuuya to occasionally consider new possibilities and explore ideas beyond his immediate focus.

This would add a refreshing dynamic to their relationship, allowing them to grow together as they explore new experiences within the safety and security of their shared bond.

In conclusion, an ISFJ female darling would provide Chuuya with the stability, emotional support, and subtle encouragement he needs to thrive both personally and within his intense lifestyle. Her grounding Si, nurturing Fe, logical Ti, and adaptable Ne would create a balanced and fulfilling relationship, making her the best match for Chuuya’s ESTP personality.

ESFJ (The Provider / Consul)

An ESFJ female darling would be an excellent second option for Chuuya Nakahara, offering a complementary dynamic to his ESTP personality. Her dominant Extraverted Feeling (Fe) would naturally resonate with Chuuya’s own Fe, albeit at a more developed level, creating a relationship built on mutual emotional understanding and a strong sense of loyalty.

While Chuuya’s Fe drives him to protect and maintain harmony within his circle, her Fe would bring an even deeper focus on fostering social connections and ensuring that the emotional needs of those around them are met.

This shared focus on relationships would strengthen their bond and make them a formidable team when it comes to navigating the social complexities of their world.

The ESFJ’s Introverted Sensing (Si), as her auxiliary function, would offer Chuuya the stability and groundedness he sometimes lacks in his spontaneous and action-driven approach to life.

Her strong connection to tradition and the past would provide a comforting and steady influence, helping Chuuya to appreciate the value of consistency and reliability in both his personal life and his role within the Port Mafia.

This would be especially valuable in moments when Chuuya’s dominant Se might lead him to prioritize the thrill of the present over long-term stability.

Her tertiary Extraverted Intuition (Ne) would also introduce a subtle, yet important element of adaptability and creativity into their relationship.

While Chuuya’s focus is often on the immediate and concrete, her Ne would encourage him to explore new ideas and possibilities, adding a layer of flexibility and innovation to their partnership.

This could help Chuuya think beyond the immediate and consider different perspectives, which could be particularly useful in his tactical decision-making.

Finally, the ESFJ’s Introverted Thinking (Ti), though less developed, would complement Chuuya’s auxiliary Ti by providing a more structured and methodical approach to problem-solving.

Her Ti would help balance Chuuya’s sometimes impulsive decision-making, encouraging him to consider the logical implications of his actions in a more deliberate manner.

In summary, an ESFJ female darling would be a wonderful partner for Chuuya, offering emotional depth, stability, and a complementary approach to both their social and practical lives.

Her Fe and Si would harmonize well with Chuuya’s own functions, while her Ne and Ti would provide subtle but important enhancements to their relationship, making her an excellent second-best option for Chuuya’s ESTP personality.

NIKOLAI GOGOL

ENTP (The Debater / Visionary) - Ne > Ti > Fe > Si

This one was hard, he is not easy to type. I considered ENFP < ESFP and < ENTP. I ended up picking ENTP for him.

Extraverted Intuition (Ne), the ENTP's dominant function, manifests vividly in Nikolai's boundless exploration of ideas and possibilities. His constant drive to test boundaries and challenge conventional norms speaks to an ENTP's relentless pursuit of novel experiences and understanding.

Nikolai’s actions, driven by a desire to prove his liberation from emotional constraints, are classic Ne — his approach to life is experimental and driven by a fascination with the abstract and unconventional.

His decision to engage in morally questionable acts to demonstrate his freedom from human limitations further illustrates his inclination toward exploring and expanding his conceptual horizons, a hallmark of Ne’s propensity for envisioning endless possibilities.

Introverted Thinking (Ti), the auxiliary function of an ENTP, underpins Nikolai’s strategic and analytical nature. Despite his apparent recklessness, Nikolai's actions are meticulously calculated to achieve his goal of emotional and psychological transcendence.

His ability to analyze and deconstruct situations logically, while crafting elaborate plans to prove his independence from societal norms, underscores the role of Ti. This function supports his propensity for complex problem-solving and his knack for understanding the underlying principles of his actions, even if those principles involve pushing ethical boundaries.

Extraverted Feeling (Fe), as the tertiary function, reflects Nikolai’s awareness of social dynamics and his manipulation of them to serve his ends. While Nikolai exhibits a certain detachment from the emotional impact of his actions, his awareness of and strategic use of social interactions are indicative of Fe.

He navigates social contexts with a calculated precision, aiming to influence and manipulate perceptions to align with his personal ideals. This function reveals his skill in using emotional insights to further his agenda, even as he maintains an outward appearance of detachment.

Introverted Sensing (Si), the inferior function, highlights Nikolai's lesser focus on detailed past experiences and established conventions. ENTPs typically exhibit a less pronounced interest in the specifics of past experiences, preferring instead to innovate and explore new possibilities.

Nikolai’s disregard for the emotional weight of his actions and his preference for forward-thinking experimentation over reflective consideration of past experiences align with Si’s inferior role. His approach to life is characterized by a focus on present and future possibilities rather than a detailed engagement with past experiences.

In summary, Nikolai Gogol embodies the ENTP personality type through his dominant Ne, which drives his exploration of unconventional ideas and possibilities; his auxiliary Ti, which supports his strategic and analytical thinking; his tertiary Fe, which influences his social manipulation and awareness; and his inferior Si, which reflects his limited focus on past details and experiences.

His darling: ENFJ (Fe>Ni>Se>Ti)

Or ESFJ (Fe>Si>Ne>Ti)

ENFJ (The Protagonist / Teacher):

An ENFJ female darling would be the ideal match for Nikolai Gogol, perfectly complementing and balancing his ENTP personality with her emotional intelligence, visionary thinking, and ability to bring out the best in others.

Her dominant Extraverted Feeling (Fe) would be crucial in connecting with Nikolai on an emotional level, something he often neglects due to his detached and experimental approach to life.

Her natural empathy and understanding of social dynamics would allow her to navigate Nikolai’s complex personality, helping him engage with the emotional consequences of his actions and bringing a sense of humanity to his otherwise abstract pursuits.

Her Introverted Intuition (Ni) would align beautifully with Nikolai’s dominant Ne, providing a sense of shared vision and purpose. While Nikolai is constantly exploring new possibilities and pushing boundaries, the ENFJ’s Ni would offer a deeper, more focused perspective, helping him to see the long-term implications of his actions and to channel his boundless creativity towards meaningful goals. This partnership would enable Nikolai to balance his constant experimentation with a more grounded and purposeful approach to life.

The ENFJ’s Extraverted Sensing (Se), as her tertiary function, would complement Nikolai’s auxiliary Ti by helping him stay connected to the present moment and the tangible world around him.

While he is often caught up in abstract ideas and strategic thinking, her Se would encourage him to appreciate the immediate beauty of life, grounding his experiences in reality. This would help Nikolai to not only plan and theorize but also to enjoy and engage with the present in a more sensory, fulfilling way.

Finally, the ENFJ’s Introverted Thinking (Ti), though less developed, would still offer a subtle, logical structure that could help Nikolai refine his thoughts and ideas.

Her Ti would gently support his complex problem-solving processes, ensuring that his plans and strategies are both emotionally and logically sound. This balance would help Nikolai avoid the potential pitfalls of over-theorizing or becoming too detached from reality, giving him a well-rounded perspective on life.

In summary, an ENFJ female darling would provide the emotional depth, visionary focus, and practical grounding that Nikolai needs to thrive.

Her Fe would connect with him on an emotional level, her Ni would align with his visionary thinking, her Se would help him stay grounded in the present, and her Ti would offer subtle logical support. Together, these qualities would make her the best possible match for Nikolai, bringing out the best in his complex, ENTP personality.

ESFJ ( The Provider / Consul):

An ESFJ female darling would be an excellent second-best match for Nikolai Gogol, offering a grounding and nurturing presence that complements his ENTP personality. Her dominant Extraverted Feeling (Fe) would provide the strong emotional connection that Nikolai often overlooks in his pursuit of abstract ideas and unconventional experiences. Her natural empathy and desire to maintain harmony in relationships would help balance Nikolai’s more detached and experimental tendencies, encouraging him to consider the emotional impact of his actions on those around him.

The ESFJ’s Introverted Sensing (Si), as her auxiliary function, would contrast with Nikolai’s inferior Si, helping him to connect with and appreciate the past and established traditions. While Nikolai is constantly focused on exploring new possibilities and pushing boundaries, her Si would offer him a sense of continuity and stability. She could help him ground his ideas in reality by drawing on past experiences and proven methods, ensuring that his innovative approaches are not only creative but also practical and effective.

Her Extraverted Intuition (Ne), as a tertiary function, would resonate with Nikolai’s dominant Ne, creating a shared enthusiasm for exploring possibilities and generating new ideas. While her Ne is less dominant, it would still enable her to understand and engage with Nikolai’s creative mind, supporting his need for intellectual stimulation and novel experiences. This alignment would allow them to enjoy dynamic and adventurous conversations, keeping their relationship intellectually vibrant.

Finally, the ESFJ’s Introverted Thinking (Ti), though her inferior function, would offer a subtle but important balance to Nikolai’s strong Ti. Her Ti would help her understand and appreciate the logical structure of Nikolai’s thoughts, even if she doesn’t naturally prioritize logic in the same way. This would allow her to support his analytical processes while still bringing a more compassionate and emotionally aware perspective to their interactions.

In summary, an ESFJ female darling would bring emotional warmth, stability, and a shared enthusiasm for new experiences to Nikolai’s life. Her Fe would nurture and balance his more detached tendencies, her Si would ground his ideas in reality, her Ne would complement his creative exploration, and her Ti would offer subtle logical support.

These qualities make her a strong second-best match for Nikolai, helping him to connect more deeply with others while still enjoying the intellectual and creative stimulation he craves.

AKUTAGAWA RYUUNOSUKE

ISFP (The Adventurer / Composer ) - Fi > Se > Ni > Te

Akutagawa's dominant function, Introverted Feeling (Fi), reveals itself in his deeply personal sense of morality and the intense emotions that drive his actions. Although Akutagawa often appears cold and ruthless, his actions are motivated by a strong internal value system that he seldom reveals to others.

His need for validation, particularly from Dazai, is rooted in a profound sense of inadequacy and a desperate desire to prove his worth. This internal emotional landscape, characterized by Fi, defines Akutagawa’s motivations and underlies his quest for recognition, even as he grapples with feelings of rejection and worthlessness.

Next, we have Extraverted Sensing (Se), Akutagawa’s auxiliary function, which manifests in his acute awareness of his physical surroundings and his reactive combat style. Akutagawa thrives in high-pressure situations, where his ability, Rashomon, is wielded with precision and adaptability.

His Se drives him to engage with the world directly and immediately, making him a formidable force in battle. This function supports his Fi by allowing him to take swift and decisive action in pursuit of his personal goals, often leading to intense and violent encounters that are driven by his emotional undercurrents.

His tertiary function, Introverted Intuition (Ni), plays a subtler but significant role in his character. While Akutagawa is primarily focused on the present, there is a persistent sense of future orientation in his actions.

His Ni is evident in his long-term goal of gaining Dazai’s approval and the way he internalizes past experiences to guide his decisions. This function supports his Fi by giving him a sense of purpose and direction, even if it is often clouded by his immediate emotional responses.

Akutagawa’s Ni also manifests in his ability to foresee the consequences of his actions, though this is often secondary to his more dominant functions.

Lastly, Akutagawa’s inferior function, Extraverted Thinking (Te), is the least developed and manifests in his occasional struggle with logical organization and external structure. While Akutagawa can be strategic and methodical in battle, his approach is more often driven by his emotions and immediate sensory inputs rather than a clear, logical framework.

His Te surfaces when he attempts to impose order or efficiency in his environment, but these efforts are often overshadowed by his more dominant Fi and Se functions.

This inferior Te contributes to his difficulties in aligning his internal values with the external world, leading to a sense of frustration and conflict when his actions fail to achieve the desired results.

In conclusion, Akutagawa embodies the traits of an ISFP through his dominant Fi, which drives his intense emotional core and need for validation; his auxiliary Se, which fuels his reactive and physically engaging combat style; his tertiary Ni, which provides a sense of direction and future orientation; and his inferior Te, which occasionally struggles to impose order on his chaotic inner world.

His darling: ISFJ - Si > Fe > Ti > Ne

Or ENFJ - Fe > Si > Ne > Ti

ISFJ - (The Protector / Defender)

An ISFJ female darling would be the ideal match for Akutagawa, providing the stability, care, and emotional grounding that his turbulent ISFP personality craves.

Her dominant Introverted Sensing (Si) would offer Akutagawa a sense of continuity and reliability, something he deeply lacks in his chaotic life. Her ability to recall and value the past would help him feel anchored, offering him a safe emotional space where he can reflect on his experiences without feeling judged or misunderstood.

This grounding presence would counterbalance his reactive and intense Extraverted Sensing (Se), allowing him to find solace in a more structured, stable environment.

The ISFJ’s Extraverted Feeling (Fe) would complement Akutagawa’s deeply personal Introverted Feeling (Fi) by helping him navigate his emotions in a more outward, constructive manner. Her natural empathy and concern for others would provide him with the validation and understanding he seeks but often feels he doesn’t deserve.

Through her Fe, she would help Akutagawa express his feelings in a way that fosters connection rather than isolation, gradually teaching him that he is valued for who he is, not just for his abilities or his success in battle.

Her Introverted Thinking (Ti), while not as prominent, would provide a quiet, logical framework that could help Akutagawa make sense of his internal conflicts.

This function would assist in gently guiding him toward clearer, more structured thinking without overwhelming his emotional processes. Her Ti would act as a subtle but important counterbalance to his chaotic internal world, offering a perspective that is both patient and rational, helping him organize his thoughts and decisions more effectively.

Lastly, the ISFJ’s Extraverted Intuition (Ne), as her inferior function, would resonate with Akutagawa’s Introverted Intuition (Ni), fostering a mutual understanding of future possibilities and deeper meanings.

While her Ne is less developed, it would still complement his Ni by encouraging him to consider alternative perspectives and outcomes, subtly broadening his view without destabilizing his primary focus.

In summary, an ISFJ female darling would bring the stability, emotional support, and gentle guidance that Akutagawa desperately needs.

Her Si would provide grounding, her Fe would offer emotional understanding, her Ti would introduce subtle logic, and her Ne would complement his intuitive insights.

Together, these qualities would help Akutagawa find the balance and emotional connection he craves, making her the best possible match for him.

ENFJ (The Protagonist / Teacher):

An ENFJ female darling would be the second-best match for Akutagawa, offering him the emotional guidance and supportive leadership that could help him grow beyond his inner turmoil.

Her dominant Extraverted Feeling (Fe) would provide a nurturing and empathetic environment, allowing Akutagawa to feel understood and valued.

Her ability to connect with others on an emotional level would help him open up and express his feelings, easing his deep-seated need for validation and helping him navigate his intense Introverted Feeling (Fi) with more clarity and compassion.

The ENFJ’s Introverted Intuition (Ni) would align with Akutagawa’s own Ni, fostering a shared sense of purpose and vision. Her ability to see the bigger picture and understand the deeper implications of their actions would resonate with his need for meaning and direction.

This connection would help him focus his energy and emotions on long-term goals, providing a sense of purpose that extends beyond his immediate struggles.

Her Extraverted Sensing (Se), as her tertiary function, would complement Akutagawa’s auxiliary Se, encouraging him to engage more fully with the present moment.

While her Se is not as dominant, it would still offer a playful and dynamic energy that could help Akutagawa enjoy life’s experiences more openly and with less fear.

This would balance his sometimes overwhelming focus on immediate, intense sensory inputs, helping him approach situations with a bit more lightness and adaptability.

Lastly, the ENFJ’s Introverted Thinking (Ti), as her inferior function, would provide a subtle but important balance to Akutagawa’s chaotic internal world.

Though not her strongest function, her Ti would still offer a logical framework that could help him analyze situations more objectively. This would aid in softening the extremes of his Fi and Se, guiding him toward more balanced and thoughtful decision-making.

In summary, an ENFJ female darling would bring emotional warmth, shared vision, and a supportive, structured approach to Akutagawa’s life.

Her Fe would help him connect and express his emotions, her Ni would align with his sense of purpose, her Se would complement his present-focused intensity, and her Ti would offer subtle logical support.

Together, these qualities would help Akutagawa find emotional balance and a sense of belonging, making her an excellent match for him.

[dreaminginthedeepsouth]

Mike Luckovich

* * * *

"Russia, Russia, Russia. It's always Russia!"

October 9, 2024

Robert B. Hubbell

On a day of major political stories, the Earth is reminding us that we are guests on this planet subject to our collective good behavior over the long term. Hurricane Milton is threatening Florida like no other storm in the last century. Millions are (wisely) evacuating in the face of strong winds and a record storm surge that will inundate coastal areas.

Two months ago, Trump joked about human-caused climate change creating “more beachfront property.” In 2021, 175 House Republicans and 35 Senate Republicans voted to defund FEMA. See MTN News, A Whopping 175 House Republicans Voted Against FEMA Funding in 2021. Many of those lawmakers are now criticizing FEMA for being overwhelmed and under-resourced. Last week, Speaker Mike Johnson refused to call a special session of the House to enact emergency supplemental funding for FEMA.

Jokes aside, the substantive policy of the Republican Party is to promote fossil fuels and undermine green energy. See Center for American Progress, Project 2025 Would Jeopardize Global Climate Action. One of Trump's first acts in 2017 was to serve notice that the US would withdraw from the Paris Climate Accords, and one of Joe Biden’s first acts was to rescind that notice. If Trump is re-elected, we should expect that Trump will again seek to withdraw from global efforts to fight human-caused climate change. See NBC News, Mike Johnson won't commit to bringing House back before the election for more hurricane relief.

The weather is not the climate and record-breaking weather events are not (in themselves) climate change. But acceleration in global climate trends over time are evidence of human caused climate change. Indeed, the tendency of hurricanes to rapidly increase in intensity—like Hurricane Milton—is part of a new trend in hurricane behavior. See NBC News, Hurricane Milton's rapid intensification is part of a climate-fueled trend.  

Climate change is maddeningly difficult because its effects are difficult to track—until they are not. We may be living through one of those moments in which the effects of climate change are undeniably manifest. The question facing us is whether we have the capacity to maintain our concern and sense of urgency after the water has receded and the news crews have moved to the next breaking story. We need the ability to engage in long-term thinking and the patience to allow solutions to work over decades (or longer).

Many worthy and effective organizations are focused on fighting human-caused climate change. I have previously endorsed and appeared before Third Act, an organization started by Bill McKibben. Third Act describes itself as “a community of Americans over sixty determined to change the world for the better. Third Act harnesses an unparalleled generational power to safeguard our climate and democracy.” Check out Third Act—or highlight your climate focused organization in the Comments section.

In the meantime, my wife and I express our concern and empathy for the hundreds of thousands of Floridians affected by Hurricane Milton. Be safe and follow the guidance of authorities!

[Robert B. Hubbell Newsletter]

[humming-fly]

North Carolina Relief Masterlist

One of my close friends is currently living in North Carolina and took the time to put together this really nicely organized list of organizations currently taking donations after Hurricane Helene, and I thought it'd be nice to share it on tumblr as well since I know some folks like these kinds of organized lists! All links and descriptions come from her and her experiences with the orgs below. 👍

Foundation

The Community Foundation of WNC - Read no further if you want a catch-all, one stop donation spot for WNC long-term Helene response. CFWNC is a permanent pool of charitable capital for the 18 counties of Western North Carolina including the Qualla Boundary (land of the Eastern Band of Cherokee Indians). They are an amazing source of consistent support to many WNC nonprofits via grant opportunities. They have financially supported so many of the non-profits I have encountered or worked with. Donate to the cause of your choice via CFWNC (including the Helene response specifically) here.

Food Security, Farm Support & More

Bounty & Soul (Swannanoa Valley, Black Mountain, and Asheville) - decade-old non-profit currently typically focused on health and food insecurity now working in partnership with World Central Kitchen, MANNA, Hearts with Hands, and many others to distribute food, hot meals, and supplies. They are also working to resume purchasing and distributing fresh produce from farmers in WNC who still have crops to harvest and sell. Donate to their disaster relief here.

Annie’s Culinary Garden - I often frequent this small but mighty Black Mountain restaurant, which is closely partnered with Bounty & Soul. Annie’s was already embedded in health and food justice work pre-Helene but the last 2 weeks, Annie and her team have been working around the clock (using a generator to power their restaurant) to provide free vegan, vegetarian, and other diet-specific hot meals to retirement homes, distribution hubs, and also to feed the staff and volunteers at these hubs. This has been a huge need expressed to me by community members because much of the food available at distribution sites is not able to be eaten by those requiring special diets. Donate to their effort here.

Haywood Christian Ministry (Waynesville) - WNC’s largest food pantry has partnered with MANNA (WNC's largest food bank?) and is distributing food on the ground and requesting donations to help with the emergency disaster response. They are also directly purchasing from WNC farms to distribute fresh foods for folks cooking bulk hot meals and for families who can cook at home. For info and to donate, go here. 

Food Connection(Asheville-based) - I first encountered this org at a food waste solutions summit and thought their concept was brilliant. They rescue high-quality, chef-prepared meals and deliver them to neighbors in need (often those who can’t afford to participate regularly in Asheville’s expensive foodie culture). I have since seen them out in Asheville and beyond to rural communities doing exactly what they do best and delivering delicious, no-cost hot meals to Helene victims. Donate to them here.

Foothills Food Hub (McDowell County) - McDowell was hit really hard and this hub is working to source water and shelf-stable goods to distribute. They will continue to feed vulnerable populations and to support farmers with direct purchasing and a reliable market. Requesting monetary donations, which can be made online here.

TRACTOR Food & Farms (Spruce Pine*, Mitchell County) - In another hard-hit county, this hub is also working, much like the Foothills Food Hub, on connecting local farmers with folks in a system of equitable healthy food access in rural communities. Donate to this local food hub here.

*Interesting aside: Spruce Pine and its quartz mines were extremely damaged by flooding and this threatens the global tech industry. This rural town is home to one of the world’s only sources of high-purity quartz. The mines are currently trying to re-open.

MANNA FoodBank (Asheville) - This very large organization is still doing what they do best and distributing food, water, and more, despite having their warehouse/headquarters were destroyed in the flooding along the Swannanoa River. Donate online here.

Farmer Support & Advocacy

Appalachian Sustainable Agriculture Project (ASAP) (WNC) - this wide-reaching farmer advocacy org is currently reestablishing communications with WNC farmers and getting aid to them. They also have healthy food programs that, once operating again, will serve tangentially in the relief effort. I have worked adjacent to this org for the last year and am a dogged cheerleader of them and their work. Donations can be made here.

Center for Environmental Farming Systems (Qualla Boundry and WNC) -  CEFS works closely with the Eastern Band of Cherokee Indians, NC State, extension services and more to support food and farm initiatives across WNC. I previously worked adjacent to this org and was extremely impressed by their commitment and effectiveness. Donate (ideally to “Friends of CEFS” for more flexible funding) here. 

Tierra Fértil Coop (Hendersonville) - social and economic farmer cooperative formed by a group of Hispanic community members living in Henderson County that grows and provides culturally-specific foods but also has community programs to support the Latinx community in Henderson county. I have attended some of their educational events and have worked adjacent to them. I am ever impressed by their work. Donate to them by emailing tierrafertilcoophv@gmail.com.

Economic Justice & More

Pisgah Legal Services (all over WNC) - these folks do just about everything “life admin” for WNC's most vulnerable populations and have done so for over forty years. They provide pro bono civil legal aid, health insurance enrollment, and more. I have worked adjacent to them over the last year and could not be more impressed by their broad scope of bi-lingual legal work that maintains incredible efficiency and effectiveness. Donate to them here. 

Just Economics (WNC) - JE works on shaping the economic development of WNC in a way that benefits everyone and promotes a sustainable future. I have attended some of their workshops and found them to be powerfully educational. I am also grateful for their political advocacy for living wages for all in WNC. They are not directly working on the Helene response (as far as I know), but the road to recovery is long and their economic justice advocacy will be especially crucial as WNC rebuilds. Donate to JE here. 

BeLoved (Asheville) - Org working on improving the well-being and quality of life for individuals, families, and communities through our focus areas of Home, Health, Equity, and Opportunity. On-the-ground volunteers are currently collecting and distributing a wide array of supplies and BeLoved will continue to play a significant long-term role in housing and more. Donate to BeLoved here.

Health Services & Equity

Blue Ridge Health (WNC) - Blue Ridge Health is a federally qualified health center that is continuing to provide accessible & affordable medical care and mental health care to vulnerable populations (now including Helene victims) with their sites around the region and mobile clinics. Donate here.

Vecinos (WNC) - This rapidly growing org provides direct healthcare services to underserved, uninsured communities with a focus on WNC's farmworkers at their clinics and with mobile clinics on site at farms. Donate to their continuing services here. 

Asheville Buncombe Community Christian Ministry (Asheville based) - The ABCCM helps run and provide shelter in Asheville and is partnered with the Red Cross. Donations help pay for motel and food vouchers for local residents and long-term support for those displaced. A personal aside: ABCCM also has an awesome medical clinic serving uninsured folks and they were the only medical service I could find that would treat a tick born illness that I had when I first arrived in the US from Canada (I did not yet have health insurance). To donate to their Helene response, go here.

Schools & Youth

FernLeaf Community Charter School (Fletcher) - FernLeaf was partially destroyed by Helene (one of the school buildings was entirely lifted off of its foundation then dropped several feet away in a truly remarkable display of the power of water from a small nearby creek). Donate to FernLeaf here. 

United Way of Asheville and Buncombe County - The local United Way typically works on youth/child food security, educational support, and physical and mental health care services. The org is helping with immediate natural disaster response and long-term support for flood victims. Donations can be made online here.

Other

Blue Ridge Public Radio - obviously these NPR folks have been working around the clock to keep people informed in the old-fashioned way, over the airwaves. You can support them here.