#meanwhile i keep waiting for her sometimes for hours

[trebeksfault]

[sevikasbooyahh]

𝐒𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐤𝐚 𝐇𝐂'𝐬

Just random random headcannons about my wife <3

She makes lots of noises; grunts, sighs, groans. It’s basically a language that only you can understand at this point.

“Hmph,” she grunted with her usual grumpy expression. “You want cuddles?” She nods her head in response.

Snores but denies it. It’s like when you’re sharing a hotel room with your family and your dad’s snoring keeps you awake; staring at the ceiling. You’ve told her multiple times but she just doesn’t believe it.

“You kept me awake all night,” you said in disbelief as your utterly exhausted eyes met hers. “Uh-huh, how? Do NOT say because I was snoring.””You were snoring.”

But in all seriousness, she started sleeping on her side—the snoring was due to her sleeping on her back.

Doesn’t care for public affection, not that she won’t slip her arm around your waist or have her hand on your thigh once in a while—but it isn’t often.

(Saw someone else say this)—absolutely loves dad jokes. She won’t laugh at anything else but dad jokes.

“Hey babe,” you slid next to her on the couch. “Hm?””What days are the strongest?“ you asked. “I don’t know,” she shrugged. “Saturday and Sunday,” you started to smile. “Why?” She was slightly curious. “‘Cause the rest are weekdays,” she couldn’t even hold it before she burst out laughing.

Takes her mechanical arm off before she goes to bed because she doesn’t wanna hurt you.

Tough with everyone else but you, Jinx and Isha (they’re alive and well).

Isha made a cheerful noise as she raised her tea cup. Sevika sat across from her, hunched over the small table, teacup in hand. She pretended to drink from it, “Mm, nice.”

Perfers actions over words—for example, her version of an apology is by doing more of what she should’ve done in the past. If she wasn’t spending much time with you before, she’d immediately take it upon herself to fix her schedule.

VERY protective, especially when you’re at The Last Drop, nothing escapes her vision.

Once, this guy attempted to flirt with you but before he could get a word out, he was immediately met with a deadly glare from her. She pulled you closer towards her with a raised eyebrow, “You got something to say?” That sent him babbling in fear, “Uh-no, no, of course not!—“”Get out of my sight.”

Claims she’s not an animal person but will come home with a kitten she found on the street.

“It wouldn’t stop following me,” she said while avoiding eye contact with you. You knew she was lying.

Sometimes when she comes back from work she’ll just collapse on the couch. She’s a busy woman, alright?

Jinx cut her hair then made fun of her afterwards.

Jinx cackled after she looked at the final product, “Sweetcheeks ain’t gonna love you now, are they?” The older woman simply grumbled under breath, “You’re the one who cut it.””Yeah and I made it ugly on purpose.”

You ended up loving her hair anyway.

Secretly likes when you lay on top of her; loves seeing how comfortable you are

She’s always warm; your personal heater

Somehow gives the best hugs—bear hugs, but is so awkward with it

Takes the longest showers known to mankind; once she gets in, be prepared to wait about an hour. Meanwhile, half the time it’s just her staring at the wall.

Will let Isha climb her on rare occasions; sometimes the girl gets insanely hyper and is moving all over the place.

Says she’s “not fond of kids” but has a soft spot for them.

A little boy with blue-dyed hair walked up to her while she was outside one day. “H-hi, can you please sign this?” He asked in a soft-spoken manner, showing a drawing, offered with a crayon. She didn’t respond but took the paper and signed her name on the back. Internally, she was in disbelief that this boy looked up to her in some way. “Thank you!” He gave a big smile before running back to his group of friends, happily showing them the signature. A twitch edged at the end of her mouth.

[cybermannete]

smoke break. - jax (suggestive)

(yall i think we moved on too fast by how SCRUMPTIOUS he looked in this episode. also i KNOW i said nsfw would be rare for TADC but.. a bitch is ovulating.)

contains: suggestive talk, making out, slacking off during work, jax being a shit, established relationship

The rough polyester of the Spudsy's uniform brushed against your skin uncomfortably, making you wince and itch at your neck and back. The smell of greasy fast food practically destroyed your nostrils, and you knew you'd never get the annoying sound of beeping out of your head for days after this.

Ragatha seemed to high off of her mind, which made you snicker at some of the things she was saying. Pomni was learning to enjoy the wonderful world of customer service, Gangle was.. it was hard to explain what Gangle was going through, you could just tell she wasn't herself. And Jax..

You got what you expected from him, only he seemed so much more irritable. Half of the time, he didn't have a fun quip or insult to follow up with his normal monotone humor. Normally, you'd let him have his space and let him approach you.

You were in charge of to go orders, calling out order numbers and names. Meanwhile, Jax worked the drive thru as well as the drink station. Sometimes you'd turn around and check on him, making sure he was doing okay. Of course, he would just give you a thumbs up.

Plus you weren't gonna lie, he looked damn good in that uniform. Black was a very good look on him.

Evening began to set in, which meant clock out time was slowly approaching. The restaurant was running slow, and everyone was working their closing duties for the night. Gangle was on the computer in the manager's office running numbers, Pomni was closing the register, and Ragatha and Zooble were cleaning up the kitchen.

You perked up the minute you heard Jax's voice call out from his position by the drive thru window. "Goin' on a smoke break." He grabbed his hat and tossed it off to the side, and he had made his way to you. He grabbed your arm, leaning in and muttering. "Supply closet. Don't keep me waiting."

Your cheeks heated, and your heart did a small flutter. But like a lost puppy, you turned and followed behind him, making sure no one was watching you. The last thing you needed was anyone seeing you and Jax go off to somewhere quiet and secluded.

You stepped into the cramped supply closet, gazing at all the cleaning supplies, napkins, straws, brown bags, etc. Jax was standing with his arms crossed against one of the shelves. Once you closed the door, he muttered. "C'mere." He tugged you closer to him, his breathing next to your ear. Before you knew it, you and him were kissing. He gripped onto you tightly, his kisses were just as rough and demanding.

It caught you so off guard that you almost fell back. A gasp left you, but your hands rested on the scratchy fabric of his shirt. He never kissed you like this out of nowhere. It was suffocating but in the best way possible. Even when you tried to pull away, he was right back to kissing you, tugging you forward desperately and going back to kissing you breathless.

"Jax-" You started, before Jax cut you off.

"Look, just stop talking." He commanded in a breathless voice. His sore aching muscles from being on his feet for hours seemed to relax in your presence. "Just- Stop."

Before you knew it, you were pressed back against the wall, Jax's kisses on your lips growing hungrier and hungrier. You were his stress reliever. He was exhausted, irritated, and all he wanted was to have you all to himself for this fifteen minute "smoke break".

You pulled away as Jax frantically tried to unbuckle the belt of your uniform. "Whoa- H-Hey what're you-"

As Jax lowered himself down onto his knees in front of you, tugging down your pants, he gave you his familiar shit eating grin. "What? I still got 10 minutes."

[petew21-blog]

Siblings rivalry

Lyle was nervously grasping the wheel, side eyeing the man next to him while driving: „Could you, please, put some shirt on?”

“Why? Is it distracting you? It’s just a body, Lyle, and you’re not a faggot. Shouldn’t bother you. Am I right?” the shirtless man sitting on the passenger’s seat responded with a smirk and subtle disdain in his voice.

“Of course I’m not… It’s because of the sweat. The car is borrowed and I don’t want to clean it.” Lyle quickly responded and tried to change the subject

“The car is an old piece of shit. We’ll be lucky if we even make it to the beach in time.”

The engine started making weird noises and the car slowed down. “See, told you.”

Lyle stormed out of the car and screamed:”Can you shut the fuck up already?! I can’t take this anymore. I want my girlfriend back.”

“I didn’t choose this either. And I still am your girlfriend!”

Lyle's girlfriend Nicole has a twin brother, Nicholas. Their family is one of the most weirdest ones you’ll ever meet in your entire life. And Lyle had the pleasure, or maybe misfortune, to find out the hard way. They got their hands on some magical shrooms or something. Some made you see the future, some gave you a really great time and there were also ones that swapped your body. Trippy right? Yeah… Naturally the parents used it for orgies and other experimenting.

But occasionally they used it as a method of punishment. Nicole told Lyle, that she had to be her mum for two weeks last summer, just because she lied about her school results. Lyle didn’t believe the whole swap thing until the parents found out that Nicholas and Nicole didn’t share the same morals about feminism and male value. Nicole was obviously a feminist, but she was belittling her brother. On the other hand, her brother didn’t even stop to consider how different a life is for a woman. The whole family had an argument about this and the parents decided to swap Nicole and Nicholas for the ENTIRE summer before university. Yep, insane.

Nicole responded to her body quite well to be honest. She was in a male body before, but never in her brother’s. Them being twins might have helped a bit. Nicholas is an attractive male, so Nicole had it quite easy. He has a great physique, handsome face and generally is a great guy. Lyle and Nicholas often joked together about women, watch football or play videogames together. But having his girlfriend in his body? Way different for Lyle.

Lyle caught her staring at herself many times. She seemed completely unphased, maybe even excited to be in male body now. Which can’t be said for me. Sex was obviously a no go. Lyle didn’t even want to touch her without feeling like a fag. But Lyle knew something bad was about to happen sooner or later. Maybe this would be a test for their relationship. Maybe it will uncover that he is a superficial asshole and that he love her only for her body.

She keeps staring at Lyle sometimes and tried to even seduce him, but he just can’t like this. Not while she is in Nicholas’s body.

Which brings us back to the present, currently on the coast far from the beach party where we were supposed to be hours ago. Unfortunately, Lyle had to borrow his grandparent’s car and it just broke down. Nicole smiled after being right again and seeing me snap.

She had her shirt off and leaned against the hood of the car. “So what now Sherlock?”

Lyle: „I don’t know. We’re in the middle of nowhere. And the cur is busted.”

Nicole: ”Jesus, Lyle. Be a man and call Jake. He can at least come get us.”

Lyle nervously nodded and took out the phone. He went behind the car and waited for someone to answer. Meanwhile Nicole moved from the front and went to the back of the car, adjusting herself for Lyle.

Lyle finished the call and before he looked up he said: „They’re all drunk already, so Daniel is going to wait a bit before he’s sober and will come get us.”

Nicole: „Good. More time for us to have fun” Lyle looked up and saw Nicole in her shorts, slowly lowering them.

Lyle quickly turned around. “Jesus fuck, what are you doing? What if someone sees you?”

Nicole:”Who? You mean the nearest guy miles away from us? Yeah, right. I wanna get Nicholas a good tan for the summer. We agreed to treat each other’s body properly.”

Lyle knew Nicole had different intentions, but he wouldn’t succumb to her. He isn’t gay for fuck’s sake.

Nicole took the folding chair they had in their trunk and positioned herself in front of the car, enjoying the sun.

Nicole: „When was the last time that the two of us had some proper free time to just stop? Did we ever? Feels like the first time. Maybe we should use it properly.”

Lyle: „What are you suggesting?”

Nicole: „I think we should fuck. You haven’t touched me in weeks.”

Lyle: „Because you are a man now!!! And your brother, Jesus fuck.”

Nicole:”Cut the crap, Lyle. Do. You. Love. Me?”

Lyle:”… I… of course I love you.”

Nicole: „Do you love me for me, or my body?”

Lyle: „I… I love YOU.”

Nicole: „So come and prove it.” Her daring voice made Lyle feel uneasy. But he felt as if something was pulling him towards Nicole, towards Nicholas.

Nicole got up, uncovering her hairy manhood. This was the first time that Lyle looked at it. It wasn’t hard, but even now it was still pretty impressive. Nicole headed to the car, going past Lyle and whispering in his ear: „I haven’t sucked your dick in weeks. I need to have your dick as much as you want me.”

Lyle looked as Nicole laid down on the car seats, waiting for Lyle to make his move. Her dick was getting hard and getting bigger. Maybe even bigger than his own. Lyle couldn’t keep his eyes off of that thing.

Nicole spoke up: „Lyle, I need you. I need your dick!”

Lyle’s dick was hard as well. He felt himself throwing his clothes off as if he was just a passenger. He thought about Nicole giving him that great blow job of hers once again. He could see in his memory, his dick disappearing in her mouth.

He got close to Nicole, lowering himself on top of her, HIM. And was ready to push his dick closer to her, but he was so horny, that he didn’t even realize that he was now the one holding HER dick in his hands. Jerking it furiously. Lick it from top to base. Swallowing it fully. He didn’t even realize he didn’t have much trouble swallowing her cum. Even after SHE pushed HER dick in his ass, he didn’t find it that weird.

They laid on top of each other, breathing out loud, enjoying each other’s company, making out. Nicole gave Lyle a sign that she need to go out and piss. Lyle stayed in the car, still struck for what just happened. Nicole’s phone vibrated. Lyle thought that maybe someone was ready to pick them up, but instead it was Nicole’s friend Stacy texting her. The text said: „Hey, Stacy. Thanks again for swapping with me. I really needed to be fucked and not as a man, haha. Hope you’re enjoying it. Luv U”

Lyle:”What. The. Fuck?!”

[suspiciouslackofclowns]

The honeymoon phase in which Billy, notorious for his temper, somehow never gets mad at Steve, lasts far longer than anyone expected.

He’s very particular about his things, and likes to keep as strict of a schedule as he can — won’t eat dinner an hour early and doesn’t like being over ten minutes late to things — and to top it off, he’s possessive.

Not you can’t talk to anyone that isn’t me possessive, but more like please tell me where you’re going and what you’re doing so I know you didn’t get murdered possessive.

And Steve has the tendency to accidentally break some of Billy’s internalized, largely unspoken rules.

He’ll use something and forget to put it back, and Billy will try to keep his patience in check while Steve attempts to recall where he last saw the item in question. Steve prefers to be fashionably late, or at least use that as an excuse for why they haven’t left for a party until an hour and a half after it’s started.

Sometimes Billy will pregame or, more often than not, pace in front of the door with the keys in his hand. An angry red creeping up his neck.

Steve once went to Robin’s after work to help her move an art project into her mom’s car, and wound up shooting the shit for too long. At nearly the four hour mark, the Camaro pulls up to the curb, and the window rolls down.

He doesn’t lecture Steve, or even get out of the car, he just looks at him. The sunglasses hide his expression enough to make Steve just a little bit more nervous as he trots up to the window and leans down.

Especially when the blond’s jaw is clenched.

“I’m sorry, I’ll uh… I’ll call next time,” he says.

Billy nods once and Steve knocks on the door panel before the car pulls down the street.

It becomes a sort of inside joke, something that the kids and Robin poke fun at him for, that starts to make Steve a bit paranoid.

What will he do to piss Billy off so bad that he finally loses it?

Funnily enough, he starts trying harder to remember. To show up earlier, to call if he decides he isn’t coming straight home.

To not completely rearrange Billy’s hair products in the cabinet when he’s looking for hairspray.

He isn’t perfect but he’s trying.

The night that everyone has been waiting for finally arrives when they’re hosting one evening, and Steve breaks the cassette player.

With Billy’s Mötley Crüe tape stuck inside.

He scrambles to snag the cord from the outlet when it starts to make a whirring sound, an unnatural smell of heat rising from it like it might combust.

When Steve manages to unplug it, he also knocks the whole thing onto the ground with a crash.

The room is engulfed in total silence. Everyone is staring at him when he looks over his shoulder, some completely stunned while others, namely Robin, have huge shit-eating grins on their faces.

Billy comes into the room not a moment later, eyebrows slightly raised as he sips his newly-retrieved beer, eyeing the bits of broken plastic scattered on the floor at Steve’s feet.

The brunet makes a face. Can’t make himself keep looking at his boyfriend when his jaw clenches and his brows pinch together.

“I’m sorry,” Steve blurts. Kneels down to set the player upright, though even just touching it feels like he’s making things worse. “Maybe we can take it to Radio Shack and—“

“It’s busted,” Billy dismisses, voice even. He takes another swig and shakes his head. “Which tape?”

Another heavy beat of silence falls over the room as Steve stands up, wringing his hands together as he processes the question.

“Shout At The Devil,” Steve says.

Billy sighs. Rubs his free hand over his face and turns back into the kitchen, disappearing from the room entirely.

Meanwhile Steve’s heart is practically thundering in his ears.

“He’s gonna rip you a new one,” Robin whispers.

“And it’s gonna be bad,” Max adds.

Steve tenses up when Billy returns with his record player in his arms, shouldering through and setting it down, plugging it in. Then, he produces the very same album on vinyl.

“Sound’s better anyway,” he grumbles. Stands up. Looks at his work with approval before he glances at Steve, at which point he quirks a brow. “Hey, what’s the matter?”

The brunet presses his lips together and shrugs. Hot shame creeping up the back of his neck.

The simple fact that Billy didn’t so much as yell at him when he clearly wants to has Steve feeling… some type of way. Like maybe he isn’t getting what he deserves.

And that alone makes him feel shitty. Makes him feel like he’s forcing his partner to walk in eggshells just to not get mad at him.

“Maybe we should… have different stuff?” Steve suggests timidly. “Like, I could move my things into the other bathroom so we don’t have to share anymore, and stuff like that. I’ll— I can still, y’know, replace the cassette and the player since I—“

“Stevie,” Billy interrupts.

His voice is soft, matching his expression as he steps closer. Reaches out to rub up and down Steve’s arm.

It nearly makes the brunet’s lip wobble.

“Yeah?”

“Where’s this comin’ from? I like sharing with you,” Billy says. “I don’t love when things get broken or misplaced, but that doesn’t mean I want us to live with separate everything.”

Steve manages a nod.

“Okay,” he rasps.

Billy immediately closes in on him, reaching up with his free hand to brush his fingers against his cheek.

“Hey, what’s the matter?” Billy coos.

“You didn’t yell at me.”

“I know, that’s why I’m confused.”

Billy chuckles, and Steve bites his lip.

“You never yell at me. You never get mad at me when you’re supposed to, and—“

“Stevie,” Billy whispers. He’s smiling, still lovingly caressing Steve’s cheek. “I’m mad as fuck right now. You wrecked a $200 cassette player beyond repair, of course I’m mad.”

Steve swallows thickly. Furrows his brows.

“Then why are you being so calm?”

“Well, is yelling at you gonna fix it? Or magically make a new one appear for free?”

“No.”

“Then there’s your answer.” He leans in to press a kiss to the tip of Steve’s nose. “Also ‘cause I love you, and I don’t wanna yell at people I love.”

From the sofa, Max blows a raspberry with her lips.

“You yell at me all the time,” she huffs.

“You aren’t my future husband,” Billy retorts. Steve snickers, and Billy’s smile widens as he pushes a lock of hair behind Steve’s ear. “Besides, when I supposed to get mad at you?”

“Dunno,” Steve says. “Whenever I fuck something up?”

Again, Billy chuckles, and shakes his head.

“Did you get pissed when I broke the vacuum cleaner trying to clean that shag rug we wound up throwing out?”

“No.”

“Why not?”

Steve shrugs and gestures lamely with his hand.

“It wasn’t your fault.”

“Whose fault was it, then, if not mine?”

The brunet chews his lip for a moment.

“Well, it was an accident—“

“Ah, see?” Billy muses. “It’s hard to get mad at you for being innocent.” He ropes Steve closer, interlocking his fingers over the small of his back. “If you were doing shit on purpose, or didn’t care, that’d be a different story.”

Steve nods. Drapes his arms around Billy’s neck.

“I’m really sorry about the cassette player,” he says. “I know you saved up for it.”

Lips brush against his, and he can practically taste Billy’s smile.

“It’s okay, pretty boy. I’d rather listen to records with you than cassettes by myself.”

For a moment, Steve thinks he might cry, but then Billy is kissing him again. There’s a collective groan from their spectators, but Steve ignores them in favor of cradling his partner closer.

Because it was never a honeymoon phase to begin with.

[etanow]

Do you have any showtime monster labs headcanons? 👉🏻👈🏻☺️

OH BOY DO I HEHEHEHE

Caine was the last to realize Pomni was in his residency (He was,, otherwise preoccupied), and was absolutely flabbergasted that Jax did such a thing as raising the dead. Caine has a strict policy on not letting humans(dead or alive) that far down in the C&A facility unaccompanied considering how many monsters reside there.It was one of the few times anyone had seen him properly upset at something Jax had done. Pomni was rightfully freaked the fuck out at a giant pair of floating teeth and eyes saying he's a long-forgotten God, needless to say, their first introductions were confusing on both ends LOL

Understandably, Pomni has a LOT of issues with herself appearance-wise. She avoided mirrors for weeks, and tried her best to keep distant from the others. Caine didn't walk on eggshells around her like the others did as she adjusted and that was something she appreciated, at least provided a little sense of normalcy. He was easy to talk to and remembered EVERY little detail.

Caine can change his form at will, but Pomni prefers his big ol' toothy head because he said he was most comfortable appearing that way.

Everyone has their own unique smells; Zooble smells like brimstone, musk, and campfire, Jax always smells like hand sanitizer and chemicals that make your nose burn, Kinger like old earth and soil, Ragatha smells comforting like your favorite old plushie, and Gangle didn't have much but she liked occasionally putting perfume on her ribbons. But Pomni always has a hint of the smell of death following her. She tried Gangle's perfumes and all sorts of scented soaps but nothing could truly mask or make it go away. It was only when Caine gifted her a bouquet of flowers that the smell was almost forgotten. Hell, maybe the plague doctors with their floral and herb-filled masks were on to something. Since then, Caine often surprised Pomni with fresh flowers, herbs, and plants to the point of her shelves overflowing with vases and pots of flowers in all states. Eventually, she gets to pressing flowers between books as a memento for every flower he's given her.

.

Pomni sometimes needs blood transfusions as her body doesn't make blood anymore but still needs it- she hates needles. Caine and Ragatha alternate sitting with her during it since it can take a few hours at a time and distract her with books or idle chatter until it's done. Caine is an amazing storyteller, he's existed a long time as both a noncorporeal and corporeal being and has countless stories of battles and moments long lost to time. He hasn't really had anyone to share these stories with, and the only other being who was around during all of it, well he doesn't get the chance to talk with him much these days...

Ragatha and Pomni got together first, they spent a lot more time together in the beginning since Caine only popped in once or twice a week usually. He started hanging around longer after a while and I'm getting sidetracked now I'm just imagining Pomni bursting into Ragatha's room sobbing with a "I'M SO SORRY I JUST KISSED CAINE PLEASE FORGIVE ME-" And Ragatha doesn't miss a beat, totally unphased and unbothered, "Ooh nice! Was he any good?" And Pomni's just standing there like "Wait What"

They are all very bad at communication lmao but they're TRYING THEIR BEST OKAY

Caine is not used to the concept of resting, meanwhile, pretty much all Pomni does in her free time most days is nap or laze around- it took Caine a while to not see it as a waste of time and now loves it when Pomni rests her head in his lap. He likes playing with her hair and watching her sleep peacefully.

Pomni keeps her gloves on often because she doesn't like the sight of her skeletal fingers but absolutely MELTS with palm and backhand kisses.

Caine is very touchy-feely, he rubs backs when talking idly or loops arms together, floats a little closer, and matches their pace when walking together (even imitates walking itself with little bobs in time with whoever he's walking with). On some bad joint days, Pomni has a bit of a limp from her exposed bone leg and Pomni finds it absolutely hilarious when Caine unintentionally matches that movement.

Pomni misses facebook memes a lot :(

[iamnmbr3]

I need to hear about your thoughts on year 6 Harry in Slytherin now pls. Pls. I'm loving these answers. :)

draco never knows a moment of peace. and neither do his housemates. they thought things were awkward and tense in 5th year. but that is nothing compared to how things are now.

meanwhile draco can't even get up in the night to get a drink of water without hearing potter's telltale breathing right behind him - unmistakable even if he can't see him because of the stupid cloak. slipping off to the room of requirement undetected is next to impossible. eventually he gives up on subtlety. if he weren't so sick with fear and guilt he'd probably be entertained by how infuriated potter is that even though he knows where draco goes he can't get in.

harry notices draco's looking ill even earlier than in canon because he sees him a lot more. and of course he also sees how often draco doesn't get back till the early hours of the morning or sometimes stays out all night.

and because they share a dormitory he ALSO notices how draco has started having nightmares. and how distraught and hopeless he looks sometimes in moments when he thinks no one is watching (joke's on him - harry's always watching). so it doesn't take a duel in a bathroom for him to realize just how vulnerable and precarious draco's position is. and well. harry's always had a saving people thing. and a draco thing. and he's got that felix felicis in the bottom of his trunk just begging to be used. he only used a mouthful to get the memory from slughorn.

he takes a swallow and sure enough. suddenly he has an inexplicably strong urge to go hide something in the room of requirement while wearing his cloak. and what do you know? he discovers the room of hidden things and there's draco. working on the cabinet. by the time harry's revealed himself the potion has mostly worn off though there's just enough left in effect that when draco swings around in horror and reflexively tries to curse him harry manages to disarm him.

draco's at the end of his rope. he sees no hope for the future. not to mention he just tried to use an unforgivable so at best he'll probably end up in a cell next to his father waiting for the dark lord to get around to killing them both. he doesn't have the energy to keep secrets anymore. he ends up confessing everything in a conversation fairly similar to the one on the astronomy tower in canon. he tells harry that no one can help him.

naturally harry is not swayed by this. he's determined to try anyway. and something about the look in his eyes has draco almost believing him.

ron and hermione find themselves roped into the effort and of course they go along with it (though ron jokes that maybe he should've chosen a different seat on the hogwarts express in first year and hermione wonders whether maybe it wouldn't have been better if they'd just left her to deal with that troll on her own).

[artsyannierose]

Movie sonamy hcs?

i feel like i haven't solidified an opinion of them just because Amy's character can be taken and interpreted in so many different ways, which inevitably makes it so that movie sonamy has many different possibilities

but here i'll try

1. I think Amy will live with the Wachowskis

i know a lot of people are concerned about her technically getting adopted, making her and Sonic adopted siblings but like...no?? She could just live there and have a familial relationship with everyone except Sonic and not get officially adopted

she gives sibling vibes with knuckles anyway, and im sure maddie is going to be thrilled to have amy in the house

or maybe they can all be her in-laws /j

2. Sonic and Amy definitely have beef at first

Doesn't matter about what, they're constantly biting at each other for the dumbest stuff

For example, Amy def likes manga the way Sonic likes comics, and they both fight about which is better

but like give them a week and now both of them never shut up once they start talking about their interests, and pretty soon everyone else just leaves the room and they will yap for HOURS

3. Amy's all girlboss since she's had to live on her own for so long, but the second she realizes she has a knight in shining armor now she totally plays the part

Like she beats up Eggman when he tries to kidnap her, but the second she realizes Sonic was coming to save her, she quickly runs back and sits all dolled up and pretty waiting for him

meanwhile eggman is sitting in his ruined rubble pile like "wtf"

4. Right from the get-go Amy makes it clear that she thinks Sonic is cute

She'll constantly make off-handed comments like "We can't do that, cause singed fur isn't a good look on your handsome face" and Sonic's thrown off at first but as she keeps doing it he eats it up

but bro cannot say that she's pretty to save his life even though she's literally the prettiest person he's ever seen in his entire life)

5. Sonic grows dependent on Amy’s attention

While everyone obviously believes in him and is not shy of saying so (save for Knuckles), there’s something different about having someone you like always hyping you up and doting on you, and he likes it a lot

Kind of like Twitter Takeover Sonic, when Amy said “You’re my one, perfect Sonic,” and he just laughed happily.

6. Whenever Sonic finds a new place of flowers while running around, he always brings one back for Amy

But of course, Amy always prefers it when Sonic takes her to the original place so she can take in the natural beauty

7. They start to mimic each other

This is a headcanon I share with modern SonAmy but you know how they say you act like the people you spend the most time with

Well yeah pretty soon after everything that happens in Sonic 4 you just see Amy tapping her foot when she’s impatient, Saying her catchphrase the way Sonic does, taunting her enemies the way Sonic does

But you also see Sonic showing more interest in fortune tellers, trying to cook chili dogs at Amy’s behest (which he usually would blow up the kitchen before), showing more interest in quill maintenance

im having a hard time coming up with stuff for him cuz idk how movie amy acts help

8. They are both AVID horror movie fans

Sonic used to have no one but Ozzie to watch horror movies with, because Tails sometimes gets scared but he’ll try to do it for Sonic, meanwhile Knuckles just flat out refuses

So when Amy comes along and she’s into horror movies as much as Sonic he’s just like “THE LOVE OF MY LIFE” and they just stay up super late watching horror movies only for everyone to find them the next morning all snuggled up with each other after falling asleep

Aaaaanyways maybe I’ll revisit this once we have a trailer of sorts but I hope this was entertaining :D

IM SO EXCITED FOR MOVIE SONAMY LETS SEE IF THEY OVERTAKE MODERN SONAMY AS MY FAVORITE

[thecircularlibrary]

getaway car

f1 au

word count: 1058

warnings: n/a

pairings: averyjameson

“Why was it so hot?” Avery asked herself, standing in the luxurious Formula 1 Paddock Club, watching and waiting for the race that she and her sister watched annually as children to start. The Monaco Grand Prix. God, it even sounded like a dream. How she and Libby had gone from a couple of low income girls with low expectations thrust upon them, to an heiress and an F1 driver, Avery would never understand. One distant relative that Avery had house-sat for one summer, and suddenly she was standing in a lounge watching one of the biggest and most historic races of the year. It still shocked her sometimes.

“Long time, no see Grambs,” she heard a familiar voice say from behind her. She turned around and grinned, “Could say the same thing to you, Hawthorne.”

Grayson Hawthorne. One of her best friends. He was wearing a Ferrari bomber jacket and a white button down with black dress pants. The staple of any of the driver managers in the lounge. 

“I assume you’re keeping up your whole ‘impartial viewer’ act you put on for every race, at this race too?” he asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Then you’d be correct. And get rid of the air quotes, I really am an impartial viewer. Unlike some people, I refuse to choose between people I care about,” Avery responded, looking pointedly at the man in a jacket supporting his younger brother’s team while ignoring his older brother driving for Red Bull. She wasn’t being serious, she knew it was his job to support Ferrari, but she also knew he was in no position to throw stones.

“Listen, you know that if it weren’t for Max and Libby, you’d be wearing a jacket just like this one to support my brother,” Grayson said with a shrug before walking away to continue to mingle for sponsors for said brother.

His brother. Her boyfriend. Jameson Hawthorne. Though she would never say it to her sister or her best friend, he was the reason she was here. They could hardly blame her either, Libby lived with her in Ithaca and Max was four hours away in NYC. Meanwhile, from March to December, Jameson was 3,485 miles away in London. The plan was for her to move over there when she graduated from college and continue her work there. However, at 21, her college graduation was still two years away and she desperately missed him. 

They’d met at a Stand Up 2 Cancer gala two months after she’d inherited her fortune at 17. She, of course, immediately knew who he was. A Formula 2 driver and alternate for Ferrari, Jameson Hawthorne was someone worth keeping an eye on in the racing world. And Avery knew how to keep an eye on the racing world. When he approached her and asked her a riddle—“If yes is no and once is never, how many sides does a triangle have?”—she answered him. The rest was history. She became close with his brothers very quickly and Grayson and Xander became two of her closest friends. Nash was somewhat of an older brother to her.

Avery was shaken out of her memory by the first of five red lights turning on. In the qualifying rounds yesterday, Max had placed 5th, Libby 7th, Nash 2nd, and Jameson 3rd. As she watched the cars line up, she noted Nash and Libby’s Red Bull cars, Jameson’s Ferrari, and Max’s McLaren spaced out among others in that order.

She watched as the cars took off and got comfortable watching the tracker on the screen , where she’d be watching for the next two hours.

- ❁ -

At the 1 hour 30 minute mark, Jameson took his pit stop. Max took hers twenty minutes ago, Libby ten minutes ago. Nash had yet to take his. Avery knew better than to question Nash’s racing techniques: as of right now, he was the number 1 ranked driver in the circuit. However, that didn’t mean he was unbeatable. Especially not by his baby brother. 

- ❁ -

As Jameson finished his last lap, milliseconds ahead of Nash, Avery let out a cheer. Grayson smiled slyly over his shoulder at her as he clapped his hands over his head. She and Grayson left the Paddock Club to see the podium celebration. Max had taken third place, while Libby had taken fifth. While Avery was sad for her sister, she knew Libby would come back from it. Libby always came back from these things. She and Grayson watched, grinning, as Nash clapped Jameson on the back and they left the celebration after popping the champagne. 

Jameson found her immediately upon stepping off the concrete and ran towards her, sweeping her into a drugging kiss. He was still sweating and his hair was completely messy from his helmet. He was wearing his red and white racing suit. He held one hand in her hair and the other gripped her waist as she held his face in her hands. He smiled against her lips.

“I missed you,” he whispered quietly enough that only she could hear. Gone was the slight twang his voice had held when they met, replaced with a subtle, barely-there, English accent.She returned his smile.

“I missed you too. I’m proud of you,” Avery couldn’t stop smiling. She hadn’t been directly rooting for him over Libby and Max, but she was rooting for him to shoot out from under Nash’s shadow, and he had done just that. 

He dipped his head to her shoulder, adrenaline mixing with the race he’d just won causing him to be out-of-breath. “We should get out of here.”

Avery sighed in sympathy before patting his hair. “We can’t. Grayson’s looking for you to go back to the Paddock club and mingle. He says you need more sponsors, Jamie.”

Jameson rolled his eyes.

“The only thing I need is time with my girlfriend that lives over 3,000 miles away,” he said, about as exasperated as anyone who's boss has hired their older brother to keep them in line. Avery pulled out her phone.

“I can call my driver. We can go back to the suite and order room service and margaritas,” she offered, letting herself be 21 for once in her life.

He looked at her, a mischievous glint in his eyes.

“I’ll drive.”

[mybelovedwoo]

brews and sunset blues

yunho x f!reader

fluff, strangers to lovers, small town romance/ wc: 1.6k

warnings: none:)

note: the second part of yunho's story is finally here ! if you want to be tagged in any of my fics, you can apply here!

yunho masterlist - main masterlist

The day after their last encounter, Y/n made her way to the bookstore, the early morning sun casting a warm glow over the quiet streets. The peacefulness of the town at this hour was something she cherished, a moment of calm before the day's activities began. As she approached the store, she noticed a tall figure standing near the entrance. She squinted, recognizing the familiar silhouette.

Yunho.

He was waiting for her, two take-out coffees in his hands and a bright smile on his face. Y/n quickened her pace, her heart skipping a beat in surprise and curiosity.

"Good morning!" Yunho greeted cheerfully as she approached. "I hope you don't mind me stopping by so early."

Y/n smiled back, slightly taken aback. "Good morning, Yunho. It's not a problem, just a surprise. You're up quite early."

"I thought I'd bring you a coffee," he said, handing her one of the cups. "Consider it a thank you for yesterday and a way to start your day off right."

Y/n accepted the coffee gratefully, the warmth of the cup spreading through her hands. "Thank you, Yunho. This is really thoughtful of you."

"I figured you might need a pick-me-up," Yunho said, his eyes sparkling with his characteristic kindness. "Plus, I wanted to see you again."

Y/n felt her cheeks flush slightly at his words. "Well, you've certainly succeeded. But what brings you here so early?"

"I told you. I'm gonna keep you company when I can. I won't let it get lonely for you ever again," Yunho replied, his smile as bright as the morning sun.

Y/n was momentarily taken aback by his sincerity. "I didn't think you were serious about that. Why are you doing this? You don't have to."

"I know," Yunho said, his gaze steady and warm. "But I owe you that much. Plus, I don't mind having a friend here while I stay."

Y/n couldn't help but smile at his earnestness. "Well, I can't say I'm not grateful. It's nice to have some company."

They stood there for a moment, enjoying the shared warmth of their coffee and the quiet morning. The bookstore, still closed and quiet, felt like their own little world.

"Shall we go in?" Y/n suggested, unlocking the door and pushing it open. The familiar scent of books and paper welcomed them as they stepped inside.

Yunho looked around, his eyes filled with genuine admiration. "This place really is something. I can see why you love it here."

"It has its charm," Y/n agreed, turning on the lights. "And it's a nice escape from everything."

They settled into a comfortable rhythm, Y/n going about her morning routine while Yunho wandered through the aisles, occasionally picking up a book to examine. Their conversation flowed easily, the initial awkwardness giving way to a growing familiarity.

"So, what are your plans for the summer?" Y/n asked, organizing a stack of newly arrived books.

"Besides helping my grandma and escaping the city?" Yunho replied with a grin. "I'm not entirely sure. I'm just taking it one day at a time, enjoying the change of pace. And maybe getting to know this town a little better."

Y/n smiled, feeling a sense of contentment. "That sounds nice. Sometimes it's good to just go with the flow."

"Exactly," Yunho agreed. "And I was hoping you could show me around. I'd love to see the places you find special."

Y/n looked up, surprised by the sincerity in his voice. "I'd like that," she said softly.

-

Yunho found a quiet corner of the store, settling down with the book Y/n had recommended. He watched her as she worked, noticing the way she interacted with customers, her small, thoughtful gestures, and the way her face lit up when she talked about books. He was fascinated by her dedication and passion.

Y/n, meanwhile, was busy attending to customers, unaware of Yunho's watchful eyes. She moved with a practiced grace, her hands deftly arranging books and assisting patrons. The hours flew by, the rhythm of the bookstore's day flowing smoothly.

As the afternoon sun cast long shadows across the wooden floor, the store grew quieter. Yunho saw his chance and approached Y/n, hiding the book behind his back. She looked up from her task, curiosity sparking in her eyes.

"What's up? What are you hiding behind your back?" she asked, a playful smile on her lips.

Yunho grinned mischievously, then placed the book on her desk. "I finished it," he stated, a note of triumph in his voice.

Y/n's eyes widened in surprise. "This fast?"

He nodded, his smile broadening. "I stayed up late last night. I was so captivated I couldn't stop reading it."

Y/n was touched by his enthusiasm. "I'm glad you liked it. It's one of my favorites."

"I can see why," Yunho replied, his tone sincere. "The characters, the story, everything about it was compelling. Thank you for recommending it."

"Anytime," Y/n said, feeling a warm glow of satisfaction. "I have plenty more recommendations if you're interested."

"I'd love that," Yunho said, his eyes twinkling with excitement. "In fact, I was hoping you could help me pick out another book. Let's make a deal. You give me a book, if I read it in a day, then you pick a place that you want to show me here and take me there."

Y/n laughed, enjoying the playful challenge. "And what do I win by this?"

Yunho's smile turned even more mischievous. "You'll have someone you can talk about your favorite books with, adventures with a new friend...and a free dinner."

Y/n considered the offer, a smile playing on her lips. "Alright, deal. But don't blame me if you end up with a reading hangover."

Yunho chuckled. "I'll take my chances. Now, what's the next book?"

Y/n led him to a different section, carefully selecting a book she thought he would enjoy. She handed it to him, their fingers brushing slightly. Yunho felt a spark at the contact, a thrill of anticipation for their budding friendship.

-

The next day passed quietly in the bookstore. The usual hustle and bustle of customers had slowed down, leaving Y/n with a peaceful afternoon. She found herself glancing at the door occasionally, wondering if Yunho would stop by again. As evening approached, she couldn't help but feel a pang of disappointment. She had hoped to see him and hear his thoughts on the new book.

Closing time arrived, and Y/n began the routine of shutting down the store. She flipped the sign to 'Closed,' locked the door, and gathered her things. Just as she stepped outside and took a deep breath of the cool evening air, she heard someone shout her name.

"Y/n!"

She turned around, her heart leaping with a mix of surprise and anticipation. There, running towards her, was Yunho. His dark hair was tousled from the wind, and he was panting heavily, as if he had been running for a while.

"Yunho?" she called out, taking a few steps toward him.

He finally reached her, bending over to catch his breath. "I'm...here," he managed between breaths, holding up the book. "I finished it."

Y/n's eyes widened in astonishment. She had been waiting for him all day, and as the hours passed, she had started to worry that he might have forgotten about their little deal, or worse, returned to Seoul. But here he was, standing in front of her, breathless but triumphant.

"You did?" she asked, almost not believing her eyes. "You finished it?"

Yunho nodded, still catching his breath. "You did give me a challenge with this one, I give you that. It was a lot harder and longer than the last one. But I finished it, and I'm still on time...so where are you taking me?"

Y/n couldn't help but laugh, a mix of relief and admiration flooding her. He was something else, that was for sure. She grabbed his hand impulsively and said, "Follow me."

Yunho looked at their joined hands, a warm smile spreading across his face as he followed her. "Where are we going?" he asked, curiosity evident in his voice.

"I take this path home every day. It's a bit longer, but I don't mind. The view is worth it," Y/n explained as they walked through the town.

They moved through narrow streets and past charming houses, the evening light casting a golden glow over everything. Yunho matched her pace, their hands still linked, as they reached a familiar path that led to the shore.

The sound of the waves grew louder, and the salty breeze brushed against their faces. They arrived at a quiet stretch of beach, the sun dipping low on the horizon, painting the sky in hues of orange and pink.

Y/n stopped and turned to Yunho, a soft smile on her face. "This is my favorite place. I come here to unwind after a long day. The sunsets are always beautiful."

Yunho looked around, taking in the serene beauty of the scene. "It's breathtaking, Y/n. Thank you for sharing this with me."

They sat down on the sand, side by side, watching the sun slowly sink into the sea. Yunho turned to Y/n, his expression thoughtful. "You know, I think I'm starting to understand why you love it here. It's peaceful, and it feels like time slows down."

Y/n nodded, her eyes on the horizon. "Sometimes it's hard to slow down and take in everything that surrounds us. But you shouldn't take these kinds of moments for granted. They're the ones that matter the most."

Yunho looked at her, seeing the depth in her words and the way her eyes reflected the setting sun. "You're right. I've been so caught up in my life in Seoul that I've forgotten how to appreciate moments like this."

Y/n turned to him, a soft smile on her lips. "Well, now you have a chance to change that."

Yunho returned her smile, feeling a connection between them growing stronger. He bumped their shoulders together playfully. "Now you should get your well-deserved free dinner."

 "Thank God, I'm starving," she replied with a laugh. "Where are you taking me?"

Yunho grinned, his eyes sparkling with excitement. "There's someone who couldn't wait to cook for you finally."

Y/n's heart warmed at the thought of the sweet old lady who had welcomed them so warmly. "I know exactly who you're talking about. I'm looking forward to it."

-

taglist: @engentiny @abibliolife @k-zuzu @dinossaurz @ateezswonderland @Reayahnadeem24 @life-is-a-game-of-thrones

[destinysbounty]

Ramadan Fasting Headcanons because I said so:

You're probably expecting me to say Zane spends hours putting together a big, elaborate iftar spread. And you're right, he does, he's a one-man potluck and its fantastic. BUT. He is also a diehard believer in the importance of breakfast, so he puts in just as much effort - if not more - into making delectable suhoors for everyone. He'll wake up hours in advance to make a full meal with carefully measured out health proportions to make sure they all get enough protein, fiber, etc to sustain them through the day.

....unfortunately, half of the team doesn't even eat it.

Cole and Wu are probably the only people who fully appreciate and eat Zane's fancy suhoors. Wu because he usually wakes up that early anyways and sometimes helps Zane out with it, and Cole because he has a healthy respect for all things food.

Kai, however, rebukes the fancy suhoor that was specially crafted to maximize health and energy, because he insists he knows a Better Way. Is convinced all he needs is a protein shake to get him through the day. Inevitably burns out by Asr and has to sleep the rest of the day, but is unwilling to swallow his pride and admit that maybe his method isn't working.

Jay is constantly oversleeping and ends up missing suhoor. Like, almost every morning. Even when they wake him up, he still winds up falling back asleep a few minutes later. Yes, he's a big baby about it.

Nya also forgets suhoor a lot, but not because she slept through it. She's usually working on some project or other and accidentally skips it unless Pixal comes down and reminds her. You would never know she missed suhoor by how she acts though - or really that she's fasting at all.

To that matter, you would never know she had broken her fast for her period. She completely stealths it.

Lloyd sometimes hides in his room eating junk food and sugar (and an absurd amount of candy) for suhoor instead of anything healthy. Zane inevitably catches him about half the time and drags him down to the kitchen for something more substantial.

Lloyd forgets and accidentally slips up a lot. But he always feels really bad about it, so everyone just pretends they didn't see anything.

Wu also forgets a lot, usually by accidentally drinking tea out of habit, but they know better than to tease him about it.

Wu also goes easy on them during this month, letting up on training aside from some early-morning warmups to keep them in shape.

Cole is the King of Naps. He is constantly nagging everyone to take naps, slow down, go easy, and lay down for a while. Once he's down for his afternoon nap, you Will Not see any trace of him until Iftar - at which point he will mysteriously spawn in the kitchen the very second the adthan goes off.

They manage their crime-fighting schedule around who has the best energy at what time of day. Kai and Jay are always the first to crash so they take a shift earlier in the day. Cole and Zane both go in the afternoon, right before Cole's nap. And then Nya and Lloyd are on patrol right before iftar, because they feel like having food around the corner motivates them to give that extra little push.

Jay, meanwhile, was already in the kitchen half an hour ago, impatiently waiting for it to be time for iftar - and complaining to Zane every few minutes that it smells so good, why can't he just eat it nowwwww

Pixal often helps Zane with iftar, and will make all sorts of passive aggressive comments to Jay until he "offers" to set the table. These comments all go over Zane's head, of course, so he's just pleasantly surprised to see one of his friends taking extra initiative with meal prep.

Kai usually gets a second wind right before iftar, and will go on a nice little evening jog right before. Zane insists he pack dates and water with him in case he's not back in time to break his fast, but he almost always is.

The question of whether being a nindroid technically counts as a medical exemption is the source of frequent theological debate around the dinner table. They eventually concluded it is, since nindroids do not synthesize food into energy and therefore fasting doesn't really have any point to it - but Pixal took this as a challenge and has since been trying to find a way to re-engineer herself with the ability to eat.

[rootspiral]

Agatha All Along deep dive: episode 1 part 3

(Wandavision entries: [1][2][3])

(AAA entries: ep1 [1][2][3][4] ep2 [1][2][3][4] ep3 [1][2][3] ep4 [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][+1] ep5 [1][2][3][4][5] ep6 [1][2][3] ep7 [1][2][3][4][5][6] ep8 [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][8][9] ep9 [1][2][3][4][5][6])

so babe, hear me out. we could adopt him. just spitballing here (agatha, probably)

bwahhaha fantasy!billy and his death stare, meanwhile real billy is such a polite baby

if you look closely you can tell Joe Locke is fighting for his life holding down laughter in a lot of his scenes with Katrhyn. he has nerves of steel, couldn't be me

(also, billy telling her she has neither the respect of her peers NOR a fulfilling home life? harsh, but fair.) (at least her wife is trying to fix the home life part)

honey, don't go around kicking grumpy little twinks now! perfectly in character. despite her chaotic exterior, rio is a very lawful person. she is literally the laws of nature!

the Ballad plays faintly in the background when Billy mentions the Road

I love when good actors have to pretend to be bad actors. and I also find it interesting that Agatha cast herself as a good guy. does it make her feel better? is she telling herself that all the atrocities were justified, that it was only survival instinct? (like rio said, she's only lying to herself)

I had to look up the painting, it's Macbeth meeting the three witches (thank you Reddit!) So Macbeth (Agatha) and Banquo (Billy) meeting Lilia, Jen and Alice?

how did I miss Billy sitting on the chair Rio was just on?! amazing lens choices here too

Wanda's death makes her cry again. I honestly, honestly believe she feels awful about what she did to her. but guilt will never be enough to redeem her - especially because she tends to run away from it.

Wanda's magic was so strong that it took at least four things to undo the spell: Wanda dying, Rio's intervention, Billy's counterspell, and Agatha's willpower. It was a group effort, Agatha could have never done it alone. And despite her scorched earth tactics, there are still two people in her life, rio and billy, willing to help out in her hour of need

it's naughty tiiiime

I still really love the curls

can I say iconique?

it's like someone's about to die at the end of this

bwahahahahaah and oh my GAWD all the case files and boxes, where did she GET that stuff, did she rob a precinct, did she make them with the power of arts and crafts

you know what I think? being naked here is a power move. she is being very over the top because she's really uncomfortable, she just woke up and she's in those moments when you stop dreaming and have to relearn what's real and what isn't. she is someone used to calculate and scheme and micromanage every aspect of her life and she is not in control right now. what does Agatha do to reclaim control? she puts on a show. to her, being under the spell was way more like being naked, her insecurities and emotions and past were out in the open for everyone to see. being physically naked could never be nearly as distressing, and this is a nakedness she chose, because it tells people nothing about herself, nothing of what she wants to keep secret and protected. she's got the upper hand, not the other way round

you are all cowards and sheep for not saying Wanda's name, says the lady who would rather hide under a dozen magic layers than face her problems

that is so nice that they brought her groceries actually??? and lol those are the flowers in Agatha's crime scene pictures

that little girl is having a great time

FUCK CLOTHES BUT FUCK THESE CLOTHES SPECIFICALLY!!!!

(wait am I allowed to post butt cheeks? what are the rules right now?)

she turns quiet and emo as soon as she's alone

why doesn't she just - kiss the wiwwle bunny. bury her nose in that big fluffly head. even villains need a cuddle sometimes.

sure, bring señor scratchy. so menacing. that'll show them.

poor boy. trapped in a closet with ralph's bluray collection

aaand I really want to get to the next scene so I'll start on it right away, hopefully it'll be ready later tonight

go to part 4

[thewritetofreespeech]

Hiii! Happy New Year! 🎉🎉🎉 Can I request Having Nanami wear a vibrator where his wife controls it by remote at distance.

Nanami being at a boring conference with reader sat across him and then reader turning it on, off, more intense, less intense and him having to act as if nothing is happening. He struggles to keep composure, having a flushed face and shaking a little bit. At the end of the conference, nobody guessed what was happening, the ones who noticed something with Nanami though he wasn't feeling well. When Nanami is finally alone with his wife, he hungerily kisses her completely turned on and feeling hot!

[changed this request a little to Nanami/wife!reader and when they used to work corporate sales together]

tags: namamixf!reader, office romance, boss/employee {reader is the boss}, vibrators, oral sex, sex in an office

-------------------------⌚-----------------------------------

This was torture. And Nanami had actually been tortured as part of his Special Grade training.

He wasn’t sure why he entertained this idea from [Y/N] when she suggested it. Happy wife, happy life he supposed. But when she came to him with those big eyes, that pleading smile, and the vibrating cock ring in her hand, Nanami couldn’t say no.

“Let’s go over the figures from this year’s quarterly reports in comparison to last year. I will pull them up on screen…oh…looks like that’s not the right one…”

Nanami grit his fists and teeth harder than anyone in the room. They were all in pain from listening to their old, dull supervisor drone on (in a meeting that could have just been an email) for the last hour. Meanwhile his dick was constantly being serviced by the pulsing vibrations of the ring around his cock. His wife was across from him. Demure as ever. Cruelly wearing his favorite suit; a little blazer skirt number and a blouse that gave the appropriate amount of office cleavage but was further to Nanami’s torment. She just sat there, calm as ever, while the secret remote on her person continued to turn the gauge up and down between too much & not enough stimulation.

“Kimori-san, let me help you.” [Y/N] offered as she got up to assist their boss with the slides. She leaned over to look at the presentation laptop and Nanami had to grip the armrest on his chair to stay put. That appropriate amount of cleavage winking at him further as she corrected the PowerPoint.

“Thank you [Y/N]-san. Now, as for the figures….”

Nanami couldn’t hear the rest of the meeting. Between the blood rushing through his ears and the sound of vibration, which he was sure others could hear but made no comment on, all the information was lost on him. The only thing he paid attention to was when their superior finally said that he was done and released everyone back to their duties.

Carefully, Nanami waited until everyone had left and then stood from his chair while discreetly covering the front of him with his padfolio. “[Y/N]-san,” he called as he noticed his wife lingering as well, “may I see you for a moment to go over some notes?”

“You should really schedule a meeting, Nanami-san.” That glint in her eye set Nanami’s soul aflame. He didn’t want to be teased anymore. “But I suppose I can make an exception. We have just a few minutes before lunch anyway.”

They head for her office. He was just a lowly salaryman. Making an exceptional amount of money for the company but still just at a cubical. [Y/N] was the real bread winner, and the better sorcerer. She was the one that had gotten him the job after he left. As a favor to her kohai and fellow expatriate. Sometimes Nanami wondered if it should bother him how much of the time she’s the boss, but then there are times like this, when he was following behind her and watching her perfect ass in his favorite skirt, that he can’t be bothered.

The door to her office closed behind them and the sound of the latch might as well have been the sound of Nanami’s will breaking. He pounced on her. Kissing her fierce and mussing up the perfect lines of her perfect suit. “Wait! Wait! Wait!” [Y/N] managed to get out as she broke away from him for a second.

She held up her fingers and whispered the incantation for a Curtain quickly. “These curtains won’t do the trick.” She said, wrapping her knuckles against the flimsy but elegant blinds against her window. “Can’t have people thinking you’re moving up on the ladder by going down on the boss.”

Nanami groaned and moved in on his wife again. Kissing her soft neck. Feeling her warm body pressed against the door. “Nanami….” She moaned as she let herself be pinned. “Don’t leave any marks. I can’t do anything about those.”

“Let them see.” He was too lust crazed to care.

To avoid conflict in the office, no one really knew that they were married. Superiors and the appropriate human resource contacts knew, but no one else. They wanted to avoid favoritism and animosity in the workplace. Be practical. On most days that was fine with Nanami. He wanted no special treatment. But on a day like today he just wanted to rip down her flimsy curtains and displace the actual Curtain to fuck her hard against the glass. Let everyone see who [Y/N] belonged to in and out of these walls.

They make their way off the door and over to [Y/N]’s desk where she sat on it. “Take this off.” He demanded.

“Awww…is it too much for the big, bad Special Grade.” Nanami groaned when her foot brushed against his bulge. “I thought you could handle it.”

“Please…” He would try begging now. Right off the bat. Nanami wasn’t too proud.

[Y/N] smirked as she leaned back on the desk with her palms. “Well…ok. But if I’m going to do something for you, you need to do something for me.” Nanami looked down as he watched her spread her legs as much as her hiked up skirt would allow. “It is lunch time after all, Nanami-kun. Itadakimasu.” Drool filled his mouth before Nanami even bent down. Undoing his belt and top of his slacks to take the pressure off before diving in between his wife’s legs. “Oh….Nanami….”

It seemed she had prepared for this in her outfit choices today. Not only was she wearing his favorite suit, but she was also wearing thigh high stockings instead of full, with thin lace panties that were easy to pull to the side to give him access. “Oh Gods…just like that baby…” [Y/N] moaned. Her fingers in his hair. Massaging his scalp. Mussing up his perfect hair. “Your tongue feels so good.”

Nanami moaned an appreciative sound against her folds as he continued to lap at her. She was already so wet. Clearly not immune to their game as she liked to pretend. A few more flicks and she would be over with. But what was the fun in that….

“Uggh..! You fucking tease!” [Y/N] growled as he pulled back from her. Licking her with just the very tip of his tongue. Causing her to quiver on the desk at the stimulation and tickling. “We don’t have time for this!”

“I guess you’ll just have to wait then.” Wait like he did. Suffer like he did.

“Alright! Alright! I’m sorry. I took it too far.” She apologized. She then scooted closer to him on the edge of the desk. “I just…please Nanami…I wanna cum before you fuck me…please…”

Her helpless little whimpers were his one, true weakness. It was how they ended up in this position. Those big eyes. Those pleading words. Nanami would do anything she asked.

Leaning forward Nanami pressed his tongue firmly against [Y/N] again and she all but fell back against the desk. Her moans and curses ring out as her stocking clad knees brush against his ears. “Oh Gods yes, yes! Right there! Mmph! Oh god Nanami!” Nanami had to physically hold her to the desk to keep her from bucking off as his tongue made quick work on her. Pushing her to orgasm and making those stocking clad knees shake against his ears. “Oh my God….that was amazing…”

“Take it off now.” He told her.

[Y/N] smirked. “I will, I will.” She promised. “But….before that…” She reached down and pulled Nanami to his feet by his tie. “I want you to fuck me with it on. So I can see what it feels like.”

Nanami groaned. He wanted the ring off but the thought of fucking her with the ring on made his cock that much harder. He was already aching from earlier and providing his service. It was probably best it stayed on, so he didn’t cum the minute he was inside her.

Nanami released his slacks the rest of the way and let them fall to his ankles with his underwear before he slid into [Y/N]. Her hot wet cunt eagerly accepted him. Walls twitching with enthusiasm around his cock. “Oh fuck…” [Y/N] moaned. “Oh fuck your dick ‘s so big right now.” She seemed delirious with pleasure. “Fuck me Nanami.”

He held on to her hips and did just that. Pounding into her to the point that he was pretty sure the desk moved. It was hard to hear it scraping across the floor with [Y/N]’s moaning so loud. She reached up to kiss him, hot & messy, while blindly reaching around the desk and found the remote. One quick switch and the ring was vibrating again. Causing both of them to moan at the sensation that was between them.

“Oh….fuck….” [Y/N] could barely speak. Just look down between her legs at his cock inside her and the ring against her clit. Shuttering and convulsing as the little toy forced her to orgasm again.

“Take it off.” Nanami was pleading this time. The feel of her cumming around him too much to bear, and he desperately needed to cum.

Apparently, the little toy had a release switch on it as well, which [Y/N] had the sense still to be able to press it. The cock ring let go and Nanami followed quickly after. Cumming harder than he had in months and what felt like buckets into his wife. Spilling onto the rich wood stain of her desk and possibly staining her carpet.

“Hells…that was amazing…”

“I thought we agreed we weren’t going to do any displays of affection in the office.” Nanami reasoned.

“Hey, I was all for tormenting you and then fucking your brains out when we got home.” [Y/N] told him. “You were the one that couldn’t wait.”

She whimpered in pleasure as he pulled out of her. Gobs of cum spilling out. He handed her some tissues from the other end of her desk. “We’re not doing this in the office again.”

“Fine, fine.” His wife agreed after she cleaned up and hopped down from the desk. Legs a little shaky. “Scouts honor. From now on, I’ll only let you fuck me in our bed.”

“….I didn’t say that.”

[Y/N] made a teasing ‘ooooo’ at his comment but helped him clean up as well. “Perfect timing. Lunch break is nearly over.”

“I never work overtime.”

Nanami gave his wife one final peck before she released the curtain and all was again right with the world. “Please let me know if I can be of any further assistance, Nanami-kun.”

“Will do boss.” He said as he exited her office, as if nothing had happened. As if they were just normal colleagues.

He went back to his desk and continued working for the rest of the afternoon.

“Hey Nanami,” on of his associates greeted as they came back to their desk as well, “we missed you down at the café. Did you get lunch somewhere else?”

“Yes.” He told them. “I ate lunch from home.”

[yo-ri-su-ki]

meow okay so HEAR ME OUT idk if you’ve ever read attack on titan college au fics but if u have ive been thinking about that but w dmc and like dante would be a frat boy, vergil would be a philosophy major you’d meet in the library, lady would the roomate and her gf trish visits sometimes and nero is the childhood best friend DYKWIM??? ok sorry this is what floats thru my mind rn 😊😊

College Can't be THIS Chaotic (it is sadly)

An: HNNNNGGGHHH I LOVE TRISH OUT THE WAY LADY MY TURN

The upper floor of the university library was sacred ground. It wasn’t labeled as such, but everyone who studied there knew. No food, no noise, no freshmen.

And no one—no one—sat in the leather armchair by the southeast window on Tuesdays and Thursdays at 4 PM. That was Vergil’s seat.

He arrived exactly on time, a black turtleneck layered under a long grey coat, two books in one hand and a black coffee in the other. Being and Time and Aesthetics of Violence this week. Light reading.

Except today… someone was already there.

It was a student, legs crossed, earbuds in, laptop open and glowing with a blinking cursor. They looked too comfortable.

Vergil stood still for a full ten seconds. Calculating. Judging. Internally debating whether murder was, philosophically, a valid course of action.

“…You’re in my seat,” he said finally.

No response. The earbuds stayed in. A spoon tapped against a half-melted iced latte.

Vergil’s jaw flexed. He considered leaving. Considered sitting somewhere else. And then, with the stiff grace of someone who’d rather be impaled than inconvenienced, he lowered himself into the seat directly across from them.

Two minutes later, the student noticed. They blinked. Vergil did not look up from his book.

“…Do you always sit here?”

“Every Tuesday. Four PM.”

They eyed him. “You’re weird.”

“Correct.”

Later that evening, Vergil’s phone buzzed violently in his coat pocket. He let it ring twice before reluctantly checking the screen.

Dante 🍕: bro get ur pretentious ass to Trish's foam party

Dante 🍕: also, don’t wear a turtleneck this time. u looked like a sweaty priest last time

Dante 🍕: also your library girlfriend stole your seat LOL

Vergil scowled. He hadn’t told Dante anything. The fact that his brother knew was—unsettling.

Down the hall in the girls’ dorm, Trish popped her head into Lady’s room, sunglasses on at 10 PM, rhinestones on everything.

“She’s coming,” she said.

Lady, in a black tank top and biker boots, didn’t look up from sharpening her eyeliner. “Who?”

“The Seat Thief. The one who survived Vergil.”

“…Oh?”

“Yeah,” Trish grinned. “I like her already.”

Meanwhile, Nero was texting in all caps.

Nero 🐐: STOP LETTING DANTE GET INVOLVED IN THINGS

Nero 🐐: FOAM PARTY?? DO YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENED LAST TIME??

Nero 🐐: he tried to cook steak in a toaster. a TOASTER

By next Tuesday at 4 PM, the student was already waiting in Vergil’s seat.

There were two coffees on the table. One was black.

Vergil said nothing. But he sat down.

And stayed there until closing.

The dorms of Floor 3B were not technically condemned, but they were on a watchlist.

There were weekly fire drills. Questionable stains on the ceiling. A vending machine that sometimes gave you two snacks instead of one, but only if you smacked it hard enough. Some called it cursed. Dante called it “his girlfriend.”

Room 302 housed Dante Sparda, the bane of the R.A.’s existence. He’d somehow convinced the school that blasting rock music at 2 a.m. “helped his cognitive recall” and once brought a motorcycle into the building for “a psych project.” (There was no psych project.)

Room 303 was a warzone. That’s where Vergil lived.

Vergil had tried—really tried—to keep things civilized. But unfortunately, his room shared a wall with Dante’s. And Dante liked to wrestle drunk frat bros on the floor at ungodly hours. Last week, he’d slammed someone into the wall so hard Vergil’s shelf collapsed.

Tonight, however, it wasn’t wrestling. It was karaoke.

Vergil was trying to meditate, legs crossed, candle lit.

“🎶 WAKE ME UP—”

THUD.

“🎶 WAKE ME UP INSIDE—”

CRASH.

“🎶 SAVE MEEEEE—”

A second crash. Then Dante’s voice yelling, “DUDE, THAT’S NOT EVEN THE RIGHT NOTE—”

Vergil stood up. Blew out the candle. Took a deep, soul-deep breath.

He opened the door.

And there stood Lady, in a bathrobe, holding an empty mug labeled Feral But Make It Sexy. She didn’t look amused.

“They’re singing Evanescence again,” she said flatly.

“I noticed.”

From down the hall, Trish leaned out of Room 309, wearing LED sunglasses and sipping a bright red Capri Sun. “I asked for 'Bring Me to Life.' Be grateful. Last week it was Pitbull.”

Lady nodded solemnly. “It always escalates to Pitbull.”

In Room 302, Dante was standing on his desk, shirtless, holding a broken coat hanger like a mic.

Some poor, terrified engineering major stood beside him holding a tambourine.

“Welcome to the annual Floor 3B Dorm Idol,” Dante declared, slurring slightly. “Today I perform not just for you… but for the ghosts in the walls.”

Vergil walked in. “You will be silent.”

Dante turned slowly, dramatically. “Oh no… It’s the Fun Police.”

“I will set fire to your collection of leather pants.”

Trish poked her head in. “Do it. I want to see if they melt like fruit roll-ups.”

Down the hall, Nero—who did not live in this dorm but showed up way too often—was hiding in the laundry room, texting frantically.

> Nero 🐐: they’re doing karaoke again

Nero 🐐: I just saw a guy pass out inside a dryer

Nero 🐐: how is this a top 10 school

---

By 3 a.m., the floor was quiet.

Lady was back in her room, reading a true crime novel with a face mask on. Trish was asleep on the futon with her legs over a lava lamp. Dante was passed out on top of his desk, muttering lyrics in his sleep.

Vergil returned to his room, stepped over a discarded wig, and finally sat down.

Peace at last.

Until he opened his mini fridge.

Inside: nothing but a single Monster Energy, a Nerf dart, and a cold slice of pepperoni pizza… shaped like a heart.

He sighed. Deeply.

You were just trying to get your charger.

That’s all. A simple charger retrieval. No chaos. No drama. You’d left it in your dorm earlier that morning in a rush to get to class. You were running on 8% battery and 200% social burnout.

You opened the door without knocking.

Which, in hindsight, was your first mistake.

Because there, in the soft warm glow of fairy lights and the faint sound of 2000s R&B playing from Lady’s speaker, were Trish and Lady—half tangled on the couch, definitely mid-makeout, definitely not expecting an audience.

Trish had her hand in Lady’s hair. Lady had a thigh over Trish’s hip. They both looked up at the exact same time.

You froze like a Sims character. “I—I—uhhh—”

Lady’s eyes narrowed. “Charger?”

“…Yeah.”

Trish, casually like this was nothing, reached for the remote and paused the music. “It’s on your desk, babe.”

You shuffled past them without making eye contact, grabbed the charger, and backed out like a cartoon burglar leaving a diamond vault.

“Sorrysorrysorrysorrysorry—!”

You closed the door behind you, stared down the hall for a solid five seconds, and then turned around.

“…I’m not emotionally equipped for this today.”

Which is how you ended up at Nero’s dorm, sitting cross-legged on the floor next to his bed while he tried not to laugh so hard he spilled soda on his calculus homework.

“You walked in on them AGAIN?”

“I didn’t mean to!” you groaned, burying your face in your hoodie. “I just—I didn’t knock! I never knock! Because usually it’s just Lady and her knife collection in there!”

Nero snorted. “You act like they don’t own the chaos. This is like… fourth time this month.”

“You don’t understand,” you mumbled. “Lady glared at me. Mid-makeout. Like I was the problem. Like I intruded on a sacred ritual.”

“She probably saw you as a threat to the mood.”

You threw a mini marshmallow at him. “Don’t make it worse.”

He caught it in his mouth like a smug golden retriever. “Okay, okay. Want a juice pouch?”

“...Yeah.”

Nero passed you a Capri Sun from the mini fridge and then joined you on the floor, shoulder to shoulder.

“You know,” he said, “my first week here? I opened the community fridge and found three raw steaks labeled ‘Dante’s Emergency Snacks.’ Things could be worse.”

“That doesn’t make me feel better.”

“I walked in on Dante shaving his chest with an electric turkey carver.”

“…Okay that does.”

By the time your phone hit 80% and your internal social embarrassment dialed down to manageable levels, you felt almost human again.

You stood, stretched, and nodded toward the door.

“I should go back. Trish is probably building a pillow fort to taunt me.”

Nero smirked. “Want me to walk you there?”

You shook your head. “Nah. If I get caught again, I’m changing majors and transferring schools.”

As you opened the door, Nero called out after you: “Hey—next time you walk in on something, knock first. Or at least bring popcorn!”

You flipped him off over your shoulder.

When you returned to your dorm, Lady was sharpening one of her knives on the desk. Trish was doing her nails and humming.

Neither of them said a word.

But your charger had a sticky note on it.

"Try knocking next time, sugar 💋 —Trish"

You died a little inside.

Made by @yo-ri-su-ki, do not copy or translate my work! Reposts and likes appreciated!! Also if you like this post and want to see more like this, consider following!!

An: "WE LOVE YOU FRAT BOY DANTE" we all say in unison also, I'm sorry if this isn't what you asked for I've seen some of the aot college aus and I loved them😔😔 just tell me if ya want somethin new! THAT IS ALL, LOVE YOU, BYE MWAH

[trenchcoat-turtle]

Summary: All of his brothers have found their person. Meanwhile he’s stuck pining for Leo’s girlfriend’s roommate. Why does the girl of his dreams have to be taken?

“Hey Raph!” I called as I walked into the lair.

“Hey, y/n. If you’re looking for Whitney, she and Leo are already in his room.” He snickered.

“Oh, yeah I was looking for her, but I definitely don’t want to accidentally interrupt anything.”

“With how long it’s been since they last saw each other, I wouldn’t recommend it.” He chuckled again.

“You guys have been really busy lately, huh?” I asked him.

“It’s been a tough couple a weeks.” He shook his head. “Foot activity just keeps growing. It feels like an impossible task to protect the city from them sometimes.” Raphael responded.

“I can’t imagine. You carry so much weight on your shoulders.” I replied as I placed a comforting hand on his arm.

His eyes lingered on mine before he seemed to shake himself from his thoughts.

“Anyway, enough about that depressing shit, how have ya been?” He asked.

“Well, I’m single.” I laughed. “Finally got the courage to break it off with him.”

A bright smile graced his green face.

“I didn’t realize you two were having problems.”

“Yeah we have been for a while. I found out that he wasn’t cheating on me like it thought. No, the reason why he is gone all hours of the night is because he joined the foot! I was so disgusted, I would have rather he had been cheating!” I ranted as I pulled a bottle of wine out of the overnight bag I brought with me.

“He what? He is a member of the foot now? Oh shit, just wait till I get my hands on him.” Raph spoke as he cracked his knuckles.

Then almost distractedly he asked, “You spendin the night?” He motioned towards my overnight bag.

“Uh, yeah if that’s okay with you. I don’t want to stay at the apartment alone tonight.” I shrugged.

“Well since you’re stayin, you wanna watch a movie or somethin?” He asked as he nervously rubbed the back of his neck.

“Horror?” I asked hopefully as I filled two cups with red wine.

“Do we ever watch anything else?” He laughed as he took the wine from my hand. He took a swig of the rich red liquid and made a face.

“What? You don’t like red?”

“Nah? What happened to the sweet white kind you always bring?”

“I thought we should be more adventurous.” I waggled my eyes as I spoke.

His mouth dropped open a little before he quickly gained his composure. He gulped down the rest of the wine in his glass.

“Let’s go pick a flick.” I stated and he followed me out of the kitchen.

After a short deliberation we decided on Evil Dead 2. We both got comfortable on the tattered couch. Him on one end and myself on the other. After the first death in the movie, I found myself inching closer and closer to him.

“I need to stretch my legs, do you mind if I lean against you and stretch out?” I finally asked him.

“Y-yeah of course.” He replied with a bit of a stutter before motioning me over.

I snuggled up next to his side and stretched my legs across the length of the couch. His arm came to rest around me as he pulled me close.

Halfway through the movie I had completely stopped paying attention. The only thing I could think about was how good it felt to be in his arms. I was relishing in it.

Was relishing in it, until Mikey came into the room.

“What is goin on with you guys?” He asked suggestively.

“Watchin a movie. What’s it look like numb nuts?” Raphael grumbled as he held me to his side to keep me from putting distance between us. He also sent a death stare at Mikey that made him get the hint. I’ve never seen him give up on teasing so quickly.

“Oh, right. Well, good night y/n.” Mikey replied before turning around and all but running from the room.

“What was that all about?” I asked with a laugh.

“You know how Mike is. Always tryin to play match maker.” He shrugged.

“And what if he was trying to play match maker with us?” I asked him as I looked up at his green eyes. I twirled the end of his mask in my fingers.

He gulped. “I won’t let him drive you crazy like that, don’t worry.”

“Oh, I don’t know. I think he’d be pretty successful. On my end anyway.”

“You’re serious? A girl like you with a guy like me?” He scoffed.

I sat up and faced him. The movie all but forgotten in the background.

“Yeah, Raph. What is that even supposed to mean? You’re hot, strong, sweet, and funny. Why wouldn’t I be interested in you?”

He was speechless for a moment before finally saying, “You have no idea how long I have wanted you.”

“If it’s half as long as I have wanted you, I do think I have some idea.” I cupped his cheek with my hand. “I had been planning to break up with what’s his face for a long time because you are who I truly want. I was just afraid of what he might have done to me if I had.”

“You know I will always protect you. You ain’t gotta worry about him.”

I leaned in and kissed him. He responded back immediately. The kiss was needy and before I knew what was happening he was pulling me onto his lap.

He deepened the kiss and I felt a bulge through his pants. The skirt I had worn was pushed up around my thighs and I rubbed against his erection. He moaned against my lips further spurring my hips into motion.

Breathlessly I asked, “Bedroom?”

His response was to pick me up from the couch and carry me to his bed.

—

AN: sorry for any mistakes! I wrote this on my phone since my laptop is being buggy.

[zennywrites]

Lucissa headcannons??

lucius' unwilling softie: lucius pretends to be the cold, calculating wizard, but whenever narcissa gets a little “accidentally” clumsy—like dropping something—he’s instantly there, like, “are you okay, my dear?” but it’s so extra—he swoops in like he's about to perform some ancient healing magic and ends up making it worse. narcissa, trying not to laugh, just pats his hand and says, “lucius, darling, it’s just a teacup.” his overprotectiveness is adorable but totally unnecessary.

narcissa’s sassy side: narcissa has an internal list of “things that irritate lucius” and loves to casually drop them in conversation just to see his reaction. “oh, lucius, i read about how you once lost a game of wizard's chess to a 12-year-old,” she teases, knowing full well it will make him internally explode while maintaining his perfect facade. she gives him that innocent look, and lucius will glare at her but secretly be kind of proud that she still knows how to push his buttons.

malfoy family game night: every week, there’s a game night at malfoy manor. it starts off “casual” but rapidly descends into utter chaos. lucius takes everything way too seriously. his competitive streak means draco ends up sulking after losing a round of exploding snap, and narcissa is just trying not to laugh. but when narcissa finally beats lucius at wizard’s chess, lucius sulks for the rest of the night, dramatically declaring that “no one will hear the end of this.” meanwhile, narcissa acts so gracious, but you know she’s secretly living for the moment.

lucius' shocking gifts: lucius always buys narcissa the most extravagant, expensive gifts—gems, rare artifacts, enchanted objects. but one time, he tries to give her a bouquet of enchanted roses that keep flying around and attacking him. narcissa stares at him, a smirk on her face, and says, “did you get this from a black market wizard?” lucius, looking so unbothered, casually flicks his wand to make them behave. narcissa’s giggle gives it away that she loves the chaotic effort, even if it’s a bit of a mess.

the “narcissa likes to steal his clothes” game: lucius’ fancy robes are basically the most comfortable thing ever—especially for narcissa. so she’ll sneak into his wardrobe and wear his robes around the house like a blanket, while lucius just stares in shock. “i was going to wear that, you know,” he says in his smooth, dramatic way. narcissa just raises an eyebrow and twirls in his robes, “mm, i think it looks better on me.” draco, on the other hand, is forever caught in the middle, facepalming at the utter chaos his parents create on a daily basis.

lucius' unintentional snuggles: lucius is not a fan of public displays of affection (very much a “i’m-too-proud-for-that” guy), but when they’re alone in their study, he totally melts into ridiculously long hugs. narcissa will hug him for a “moment” and he will stay there for five more minutes while pretending it’s not happening. his hand will sometimes slip up and accidentally brush her hair back like he’s trying to keep it out of her face—cue narcissa giving him a side-eye, and lucius trying to act like it’s no big deal, but it’s CLEARLY his favorite thing ever.

draco's "training": narcissa and lucius both mean well but when it comes to teaching draco “proper malfoy etiquette,” it’s a disaster. lucius insists on giving him speeches that go on for hours, while narcissa just sits there, looking like she's about to lose it. at one point, narcissa just interrupts and says, “lucius, darling, he already knows how to sit properly at the table. maybe try teaching him how to not knock over his glass of pumpkin juice every time?” lucius refuses to admit he’s been giving way too much advice, while draco just cannot wait for the torture to end.

lucius' "unassuming" tea parties: lucius, being the epitome of dignified, refuses to have a “basic” tea time. instead, he invites no one over, yet still sets the table extraordinarily perfectly. narcissa’s just there, sipping tea, pretending to be in a fancy salon while lucius shows off his absurdly perfect tea brewing skills. and they sit there, in an over-the-top, dramatic silence—because it’s way more fun than it sounds. it’s honestly just them being goofy in their own way, but they’d never let anyone else in on it.

lucius + narcissa synchronized sarcasm: they have this amazing talent for syncing their sarcasm perfectly. if someone says something ridiculous at a dinner party, lucius will give the “i’m disinterested” eyebrow raise, and narcissa will instantly chime in with the most sarcastic, dry comment. this always leaves everyone else in the room confused, while lucius and narcissa just share a small, private smirk like this is their little game.