#me when my face burns off
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He has 500 disorders and isn't allowed in public spaces
#sensitive tw#i guess#i mean#his face is melting off#so#yeah#sensitive#idk#me when my face burns off#but#at least my hat stayed on#face is temporary. swag is forever#weeping clown idv#joker idv#weeping clown#idv#identity v#art
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I woke up this morning still thinking about Fadel waking up in Style's bed.
I wonder what was running through Fadel's head as he turned to look at Style, eyes still squinting against the too-bright morning light, the unfamiliar comfort of the shape of Style's name on his lips for the very first time. I wonder if he was too sleepy to process how strange it was that he didn't really mind being pinned down by the weight of Style's thigh thrown over his hips; that the sensation was grounding and reassuring rather than being confining or suffocating. I wonder if the thought crossed his mind that he wouldn't mind waking up like this again, wouldn't mind letting someone into his space, wouldn't mind giving someone the bared vulnerability of lying naked and unprotected with all the implications of unwavering trust that has -- not if it was with him.
I wonder if Fadel registered the way his heartbeat is steady and calm despite the strange surroundings and unfamiliar bed, because something in him has already labelled the person lying next to him as safe.
I wonder if Fadel even understood that this, right here, in all its quiet and unacknowledged stillness, was the moment he fell in love?
#the implications of a trained assassin whose own parents were murdered in front of his eyes and who has been burned by love before#CHOOSING to stay the night and then waking up naked and vulnerable and being ABSOLUTELY CALM AND AT PEACE with it!#yeah i'm calling it -- THIS is when fadel actually fell in love. it's why the rest of the episode gives us:#fadel being able to say out loud “i want him to accept me for who i am”; because a part of him already felt like style HAS#fadel telling style “you don't have to do anything to impress me”; because style has already earned the right to fadel's trust and heart#fadel answering style's plea of “promise?” with a kiss because he'd just lied to style with his words#so he tries to tell style the truth with his body instead#because he doesn't realise that a single phone call would be all it takes to turn his reply into an unintended deception once again#the heart killers#the heart killers the series#fadelstyle#fadel#thk meta#fadel meta#thk ep 6#hui talks thai bl#hui talks thk#i've been staring at this particular screenshot for a while and the way there's NO CONFLICT AT ALL on fadel's face just...#*sits in the corner with my head in my hands*#you guys are probably all really sick of me by now#I know I’m somewhat reiterating my point#but it hit me that this really is LOVE now…like I’ve been holding off on that conclusion for so long#because episode 4 gave us a confession of frustration#and episode 5 gave us a confession of fear#but this episode is fadel finally recognising the the has truly fallen in LOVE#and that makes epsisode 6 so much worse because it comes because fadel thinks style doesn’t love him in return
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OOH YEAH BABY ITS THE SURGERY EPISODE BABY!!! ME AND THE HOMIES NEED SOME NEW FACES FOR OUR NEW PLAN, AND WHO BETTER TO GET THE JOB DONE THAN THE TWO MOST EVIL PEOPLE WE'VE EVER HAD THE MISFORTUNE OF HAVING OUR LIVES VIOLATED BY? I MEAN IT WOULD BE FUNNY. IT WOULD BE FUNNY.
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#cw blood#cw gore#jrwi suckening#jrwi suckening spoilers#vex waylin#viv waylin#MY FAVORIT EP!! HAVNT SEEN IT IN FOREVER THO BC WELL. IM BUSY. SO BEAR W ME IM RUNNIN OFF ALOTTA MEMORY FUMES#ALSO EDIT BC FUUUCK I HADMORE TAGS BUT TUMBLR FUCKEN ATE EM. OH WELL. MY DMS R OPEN IF U WANNA UNLOCK RAMBLES.#I LOVE THE WAYLIN TWINS SSSOO FUCKING MUCH IM SO!!! CURIOUS ABOUT THEM!!! WHO WERE THEY WHEN THEY WERE HUMAN? HOW LONGVE THEY BEEN ARND?#I LOVE IT WHEN PPL SAY ITS LIKE THESE TWO WERE MADE FOR MMEE BC YES!! YES!! ITS EVERYTHING I COULD EVER WANT FROMA CHARACTER!!!#I LOVE THEIR RED WHITE N BLACK COLOR SCHEME. I LOVE HOW THEYRE BOTH SO INTELLIGENT AND GENIUS N YET THEYRE DUMB AS FUUUUCK#COOOMICAL SUPER VILLAINS. OOH ILL GET YOU NEXT TIME SHAMIA SHAMAI!!! HOW DARE YOU FOIL MY PLAN!! MY PLANS OF MUTILATING AWAKE N ALIVE PPL#COMICAL AND YET. GENUINELY HORRIFYING. VIV CAN MAKE UR BONES EXPLODE JUST BY THINKING ABOUT IT. VEX CAN BECOME SOUP#WHY DONT WE TALK ABOUT THAT MORE? THE TURNING INTO RED MEAT SLIME?? METAL AS FUUUCK. I ALSO LOVE HOW SCARED THEY GOT SO QUICKLY#THIS LIL FUCKEN RRRRRAT COMES IN. AND WELL. HES JUST LIKE ALL THE OTHERS. WE FUCK HIM UP N TOSS HIM INTO THE SUN N LET HIM BURN#SURE HE HAD ONE MORE TRICK OF REBELLION UP HIS SLEEVE BUT THE SUN HAS TAKEN HIM NOW. ITS FINE. WE'RE FINE. HEY IS THERE SMTH IN THE CEILING#OHHH WE KILLED HIM ONCE N HE CAME BACK. WE KILLED HIM AGAIN N TOOK HIM APART BUT THEN HES BACK?? HE GETS AWAY AND THEN. COMES BACK. AGAIN.#WE CANT GET RID OF HIM. THAT FOUL SHAMIA SHAMAI. A MOUSE IN OUR KITCHEN. FUUUUCK HES GONNA SPREAD DISEASE! KILL IT! KILL IT!! AAAUUGH FUCK!#I LOVE THAT THE WAYLIN TWINS AGREED TO HELP THE BLONDE TWINS MOSTLY ON THE BASIS OF 'IT WOULD BE FUNNY' BUT ALSO#OOHHH WE ARE SO CLOSE TO REACHING SOMETHING TO MAKE HIM NNEEVER FUCK WITH US AGAIN. HIS ILLUSIONS WILL HAUNT US NO LONGER#THEY WERE SSSOOO PARANOID W ALL THE CAMERAS AND BOMBING THEIR OWN LAB AND RUNNING AND RUNNING AND GETTING AWWAY FROM THIS FUCKEN! MOUSE!!!!#OHHHH I THINK IM RUNNIN OUTA ROOM so ill talk about da art real quick.BEEN WORKIN ON THIS FOR A WHIIILE.ALOTTA THESE were started when the#ep came out.so OLD!! BUT DONE!!and im very very happy w my colors n gore n EXPRESSIONS!! the top right corner comic keeps making me chuckle#I ALSO rly love the lil convo between arthur n viv.theyre SO CUTE TOGETHERR they should go ona museum date together or somethin#they need more time to just talk abt da World together.ALSO CAN I BE PETTY.I MADE ARTHUR UGLY CORRECT-STYLE#THESE BOYS KNOW NOTHING OF UGLY.I MADE THE VAMPIRIC FLESH EVOLVE N ROT N BLOSSOM AND THERE IS SQUIRMING WITHIN THE TENEBRAE#UHHH IEAH THIS GUY W A ROTTED N DISTORTED FACE WALKS INTO MY BIKE STORE IEAH IM SCREAAAMIN LIKE WADDA HELL!! MONSTOR!!!
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I'm literally so close to blocking the Veilguard Critical tag. Much love but I'm a sheep. Bioware said 'nah nah nahnahnah' to me for ten years and then gave me this and I'm kissing them for it. No thoughts head empty. Emmrich Volkarin and calliope music, that's what I have going on up in my brain space.
#Maggie Talks#The world is burning and I am going to dedicate exactly zero percent of my remaining energy#to being mad about things I can't change about a game that's good it's GOOD#Maybe not great maybe not perfect but it's GOOD and I LIKE IT#I eliminated all my expectations when they announced Dreadwolf and then fell off the face of the planet for four years#For me personally it's like. We have a GAME and it's PLAYABLE and it has CHARACTERS I LIKE
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Namalin
Namari x Falin
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Easy short rarepair spotlight post for prosperity~ This one I didn’t think of on my own for once, I don’t know if it’s just I forgot the decided-on ship name or what but I remember seeing really nice art and a couple posts about it that I can’t find again 💔 Namalin warrior you are out there and not forgotten ty for making me see the light
I like that Namari’s critical of Falin! I have a whole character analysis on Falin if you’re interested, but it’s generally well noticed that people around Falin idealize her a lot. Laios, Marcille and Toshiro all put her on a pedestral of ultimate goodness in the world, a saintess if nothing short of perfection. Sounds like Chilchuck felt sort of creeped out by her vibes, uncomfortable because he couldn’t read her, so unlike Namari it seems he preferred steering clear of her rather than debate opposed ideologies like he usually does. Makes sense if unlike Namari his issue is with her cryptic aura rather than the stances she does show. "… The dungeon is no place for soft hearts" my ultimate namalin scene <333 It’s fun because while this scene is there to show us a lot of things, mostly to establish Falin’s characters better as it’s the first flashback of her we get, the conflict in it is more than anything else Falin vs Namari in how they contrast and clash and approach situations differently. Namari wants security in swift effective violence and thinks Falin too soft for her own good when she prefers a pacifist approach and promotes compassion even for the "undeserving" in Namari’s eyes. Falin steps between the battle ready Namari and the ghost, fearless. Falin effortlessly gently exorcises the ghost without one step back, quickly. Falin proves someone wrong. Falin proves someone wrong.
I love thinking of Namari being surprised when she learns new aspects of Falin. I like Falin having the power to shape people’s views on her. With Falin ships the most fun part for me is usually that point where Falin/the relationship becomes a clean slate: the person realizes they haven’t been seeing all of her, realizes there’s more of her they hadn’t noticed or that she hadn’t shown, that there’s change, a shift in the views on each other and the dynamic a bit.
Namari often feels like an external view looking in to me… I need to make a proper analysis on her but like. I made a lamari post once (analytic more than personally invested rip sorry) and I go with the same Namari take here, I think she’s someone who tends to have an outsider view on people and relationships if that makes sense, she’s a coworker before anything else and she’s content staying at a distance, she’s not objective per se but she tries to keep feelings out of her choices and how she sees people (her lil arc on not staying to save Falin despite the existing camaderie but in the end asking to work for the Flokes more because she wants to stay with them). She’s serious no nonsense on the job but friendly off the job and likes having casual friends, but she’s not… She doesn’t really feel connected to the group. She’s so focused on doing her job, even if she does get impulsive and passionate and too assertive for her bosses’ tastes, so focused on working her reputation and life from the ground up that that professionalism and attitude limits her social life. It doesn’t help that her reputation makes her widely judged, so she probably enters social spaces on the derensive. The closest person she was to pre-canon as far as we knew was Chilchuck and even they have a very "coworker I get along with" dynamic more than friends, with a similar sense of boundaries, humor and world view. Also like canon says a few time, the party didn’t really try to get to know each other well pre-canon, didn’t hang out after work often no one knew where Marcille was from and no one thought that was weird (also how no one had the instinct to ask about Senshi’s past) etc, the notable exception is we’re shown Namari and Chilchuck hitting taverns together and having a grand time. Everyone’s fine with things as they are, they get along decent even if not everyone considers each other friends exactly. Where I’m getting at is that to me, it feels like she tries keeping emotional distance. Emotional distance from people in general being something which in my interpretation of Falin is also present, which would make it a theme and common thread interesting to explore imo. But yes like, Namari looking at Falin, and how everyone treats her, and being more skeptical, seeing her for what she is a little more, maybe even uncharitable. "Why is everyone treating her like she’s all that? She’s gentle sure but seems like a doormat to me" and then one day she comes running up with her mace ready to cave in someone’s face to protect Laios. So yeah… Keeping her distance but one day Falin offering her some gentleness that feels very too personal for someone who’s not used to being genuine and simply showing that they care… Them talking a bit which leaves her stumped and mindblown in a quiet way when Falin defies her expectations. Namari growing on Falin when she stays and decides to open herself up more, or when Falin ends up reading her really well like she’s shown to do with her parents and Marcille’s worries. She’s very attuned to worrying and why and when different people do it especially when it comes to when they worry for others, perhaps because she does a lot of that too, so I think she’d nail down how Namari does care for the rest of the party and it’d make Namari feel seen both in a warm validating way and in a scared naked way.
We see in the tentacles chapter that she’s someone’s who’s very protective and looks out for her peers in a tough love way. She’s overbearing but it’s because she wants everyone to have the best chances. I like that she’s very confrontational and somewhat pushy and rude, but it’s tough love, it’s protective care: asserting herself to better protect and defend. The opposite of Falin’s type of care, quiet and self-sacrificial devotion. They’re barbarian x healer but they’re also bodyguard x bodyguard in their attitude and role. … What I want for them is slow burn slice of life of being coworkers and slowly getting to know each other better, pretty fluffy, but god, put this way they’d have the potential to be such a hot layered mess of insanely mutually devoted codependence… Falin taking a hit for Namari and Namari being scarred by it forever, lots of arguments about it, my god.
I like that she’s the fighter to Falin’s healer. I looove thinking of scenes of Falin healing Namari, necessitating touch and like, a moment of slowing down and sitting together in silence, too intimate, the perfect opportunity to connect that neither truly want to take until one day they do. I love how onesided I imagine the relationship would be at first. Again, as per my interpretation of Falin, I think Namari would have all these little observations and opinions on Falin meanwhile Falin really doesn’t think of Namari much at first. So Namari thinks a lot about Falin and thinks she’s got her pinned down but hasn’t (not that she’s fully wrong, she’d have credit and confront Falin on some of her flaws like the doormat thing), while Falin is very passive about Namari and doesn’t think deeply about her or anything but she read Namari’s insecurities and logic well. Not unlike how Laios was the one who seemed to understand Namari’s way of care the best in the party in the tentacles episode, and how he was very understanding of her choice and reasons. In Falin’s case it’s more like, the objectivity of passivity… She cares about Namari less than Laios who generally seeks to form bonds, so her lack of investment allows her a neutral perspective. In that way another parallel with Namari that I’m drawing, except Namari lets feelings from her opinions seeps in more… Onesided beef my beloved. I’m going insane save me this post was a mistake. I think Falin takes the crumbs of friendship and love where she can without expecting or asking for anything more than what’s offered, and I think her relationship with Namari (or anyone really) would start out the way it did with Marcille: the other takes the initiative and they end up spending time together, Falin is friendly but unattached until the bond gets gradually and wordlessly strenghtened through regularly spending moments together. So! I think Namari would need to take a lot of the first steps, which since again she’s confrontational & argumentative and doesn’t hold herself back on that front that could spark a lot of conversations I think. Ooor since Falin cares about Namari less than Laios and Marcille she allows herself to be bolder herself lol. Or also circumstances force them to spend time together like dungeon party getting separated shenanigans.
I think their personalities match cutely, I think falin would try to protect namari like she does others but also Namari simply doesn’t need protection, just support. And I think they’re complementary in that way that Namari’s friendly but also won’t sugarcoat things, and I think if she takes an interest in Falin it could go from there and she could develop some understanding of her and idk like an intrigued crush….
Namari wants stability & security & to, like, not be judged and rejected and exiled lol, to find her nest her pack the place where she feels good and wanted in. I think having a fitting partner would help in that (similarly to how the found family with the Flokes seemed to. Oh another parallel, Falin’s top priority is protecting Laios her brother and what Namari are a family figure) and I think Falin would fulfill that cozy protection and that warm ‘being seen and not judged’ feeling. But also Namari would run up to her and yell about her trying to sacrifice herself ever.
Another fun thread to explore: post-canon guilt for not having gone to save her. Sure, they weren’t close, but they had some nice memories, didn’t they? Namari cares, and it stings despite herself when it feels like people think she doesn’t. Oh it wasn’t a lost cause after all, oh it’d have worked out, oh I could have stayed loyal and it wouldn’t have compromised myself in the end. Wanting to apologize to Falin, or just ahnging out with her and sharing a moment after she wakes up. And tangent but that’s interesting to think about… Narratively, I think the purpose of Namari and Toshiro in the story, beyond strenghtening the theme of "seek to understand what is different from you and promote unity despite them" and fleshing the cast and worldbuilding, is Toshiro’s purpose was being a foil & tool in Laios’ arc (trouble connecting with people) while Namari’s was being and a foil & tool in Marcille’s arc (standing up for ideals without being out of touch with harsh realities and needs). They are the conflict that push our protagonists to grow— and they explore different ways of dealing with a situation or topic, different ways of growing into themselves on that end: Laios needing to listen to others more and Toshiro needing to focus on voicing himself more to be able to connect, Marcille needing to learn ideals sometimes cost too much and Namari needing to internalize that ideals are sometimes worth risks (not only to be able to find a reasonable but fulfilling life balance, but also to get in touch with their compassion: Namari restricts her own too much and Marcille is too harsh on people she deems to be breaking values, like Namari not risking her life and career for a friend with no promise of success, or even like how Namari is harsh on Falin’s way of doing things : too gentle, too soft, too idealistic) (similarly to Chilchuck’s arc with Marcille too, and he also plays a hand in advancing that arc in the Namari chapters). We are getting far from namalin sorry ummm preview for future analyses like Toshiro’s contrasting approach to grief and accepting loss.
More post-canon namalin! Thinking about a timeline where… Namari is fond of Falin finding herself and going off to do her thing. "Finally!" she thinks. If she’s still for hire, maybe Falin would want her to come along, either as guide or bodyguard <3, she knows Namari has a lot of good avice on a lot of things to give, plus they’ve worked together before. She hires Namari and they travel for a bit. Travel would do Namari good too I think, even if her end goal is to settle and I think Falin’s would be too eventually. Seeing sights that light her wonder for the world and going places where people don’t know her story, don’t recognize her face or her name. Them, feeling free. Finding a companionship that feels uplifting instead of stifling or charged. Namari having been too in her head about reputation and social games and money that they hit the roads and spend time in nature and it’s like, woah. I’ve been living in a small world with made up rules.
Ahh yes romance, Namari and Falin kissing after 3 years of not really knowing each other despite seeing each other every day then 2 months of wanting to spend more and more time together until they’re an inseparable duo! Workwives. I want them to stand next to each other during campire time and Namari cracks little jokes and Namari laughs. I want Namari to gift Falin a bug caught in amber and for it to be their wedding/promised to each other thing.
TLDR
Rowdy but levelheaded barbarian x gentle healer that will also cave your face in with a mace I like it…… They’re an interesting duo of mixed stuff. Protection being your purpose and what you’re worth for, literally being a meat shield (Laios, Tansu), finding your individuality recognized and validated through a growing bond with the other. Sticking around as a love language. Also bug immortalized in amber and it being beautiful.
Nevermind this wasn’t short. Um! Anyways.
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#Dunmeshi rarepairs#Namalin#Namari x falin#Falin x namari#Spoilers#Dungeon meshi manga spoilers#Bc of a chapter cover + post-canon talk#Namari#falin touden#Dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#Gotta make a namari analysis eventually. Maybe. One day. Tough skinned girl bc she’s been burned and reputation is v important#who cares but caring doesn’t put food on the plate. Who’s an outcast and foreigner and doesn’t have a home to go back to#It’s the hustle life. Idk what it is about the Floke that made her want to stay but that’s why i wanna look at the tansu party eventually#Namarlin ot3 is so good as well… esp if it focuses on namari#Namari is poly i know it in my heart#Also YES I know there’s 1 namarlin/namalin fic out there i haven’t read it. Yes i will. I just haven’t been reading much lately#Oh on that note -types up new post-#Analysis#character analysis#relationship analysis#meta#Holding my head#Complementary ships with conflict and character arcs i love you#Watch fumi’s brain melt live#Fumi rambles#I need to go lay face down on the floor now#This sure is what I was supposed to take away from the canon text!#TAKE IT OFF MY HANDSSS TAKE IT AWAY FROM ME I NEED TO ACTUALLY GO DO CHORES#Namari betting Falin would reject Shuro but going “no comment -looks away-” when asked why…
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guy liker moment
#a doodley#once again very difficult times for the has never been touched community#also recently some fictional men have me questioning things further and its making me sooo miserable#in the sense of like. it wouldnt be enough to t**** a beautiful man i want to be one. too.#i want someone to feel the same way ykwim. eager excited. witnessing beauty. crawling into each others skin.#i want you and i want to wear your face and be desired too.#ugh ugh ugh ugh#i probably wont ever even draw it but the lino piece i want to try making is based off of like. lately...#my skin burns when i see even the imitation of a human body. When i think of it. its so dire#or like i love the human body in general i love studying it bc its so beautiful and interesting no matter what#but i do studies and its like ahh i wanna get closer i wanna get closer im at the zoo i want to jump into the enclosure and get clawed apar#t. (saying this as metaphor bc obviously humans are not things to be owned) but i want my own model to pose and study#closer. and closer. look and touch and examine.#<- 3 seconds away from drawing nefarious shit with talon in this nature but i didnt say that#talkys#🌺
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he has the biggest doe eyes in the entire world and no one ever knows because he has no work life balance
#spiderman noir#spider noir#yeah new hyperfix Got me#its okay though i prommy TLWR chater 6 will come out soonish#hes been in my brain though#loved him since like 2014 when i first played shattered dimensions#and then in 2018 when itsv came out#and i will continue to be ill about him until the day i die#can i get an amen#anyways heres my mask off design. he got blowed up on the right side so thats an esplosion/burn scar#dont ask why his ears r pierced im jsut insane#anyways i believe in soft round faced badas character rights#is he in the great depression. yes. do i think he should have a round fface. also yeas#atsv#joodle
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I lied last time sorry. Robot freak posts will not stop
#me when steam 💥💥💥💥#having fun with their mechanism :] also still going at it with rabbits and hatchys jaws#literally my first thought when I realized that those weren't markings in his face and he was just hollow was “I COULD PUT MY FINGERS THERE”#and im still not over it !! lets ignore that they would either burn to ashes or he would chomp them off <3#traditional art#sexpg#sex powered giraffe#suggestive
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i hate spring. I hate how i never know what to wear because it’s either too cold or too hot.
And the fucking bugs. I hate bugs.
Don’t even let me get started on summer…….
#spring#summer#i hate both#and everyone just shoves it in your face like YOU HAVE TO LOVE SPRING#IT’S SO FUCKING FLOWERY#well guess what i have bug phobia so go eat them all#and i hate sweating and i hate how the sun burns my skin#i hate how you can’t just peal your skin off because it gets so hot#yeah this is a hate post#it makes me so edgy when everyone is just overly happy about spring like you also have to LOVE IT#duh#winter#autumn#cold seasons are the best
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me when the guy I’m very delusional-y head over heels for. Me when he’s so fucking pretty to me for some reason. Me when he has like zero swag besides band shirts but that’s okay. Me when he remembers something I liked last year and haven’t brought up much this year. Me when he just generally knows the stuff I like. Me when he’s swings both ways (my chances went up maybe like a small bit !!) Me when. When.
#Guys this is like my one true shot at what I hope to be a normal relationship#And I’ve actually known the guy for longer than a couple of months!!!!#He’s so everything to me when I’m not filling my mind with fiction it’s just him#I feel like I care a bit too much when I’m around him like is it noticeable when my face is literally burning for whatever reason it may b#Sitting next to him in a normal room isn’t enough I need to go sit with him outside or some shit…not even talking just sitting#He’s one of the few people that just being in the presence of makes me feel so just. !!!! And it’s like times a million with him it’s justt#But I fear I am just a cringe pick me in reality /.hj#Destined to be good friends unfortunately#Well I mean fortunately I even get to be friends with him. But still you get my point#S.K goes off about love again#S.K thinks
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the current state of the arg
sorry guys the art isnt arting D:
(btw if youre confused on why i drew turnip like that i was referencing the picrew he did ages ago bc idk it looked fun to draw anddd i dont like taking reference off real life images)
#i felt like just a lillll bit of a creep relistening to voice messages over and over to find a good quote but. yk what. it was worth it#i totally didnt take reference from the really cool face i used in that animation because im still really proud of it#idk if emi or TD have a sona but if they do im not aware of it and i didnt feel like asking so i just drew both of them as blank characters#im too stressed to scheme lol#maybe#just maybe#i need to stop drinking tea because the caffiene makes me anxious#...#naaaaahhhh#i dont really know what to do with myself atm because i dont want to work on the animation unless turnon is ok out of pure spite#this morning i was absolutely radiating stress#i have a friend who shows up so we can walk together to school and she could tell smth was off lol#i literally could not hide it at all even if i wanted too#i kept pulling my hat over my face thats the main way you can tell that im stressed#not that it really matters that you know that bc none of you are ever gonna witness that but. fun fact abt me ig#ugh#if turnon dies i am gonna cry so hard <333#and i wont finish the animation <333333333#(at this point just trying anything to get turnon back)#im gonna make a word doc#i make word docs when im stressed /hj#quick question turnip : is there a way to get turnon out of the situation he is in or is he just gonna die and theres nothing we can do#about it /gen#because i have a sneaky suspicion that we cant actually do anything about this#i swear to god#LETS LOOK ON THE BRIGHT SIDE!!#A DEFRAG MIGHT COME OUT TMR!!#its been 21 days and a defrag takes on average 20-25 days#ough#turnip and addon im gonna find where you live and i will burn your respective houses down
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{ Just got back into the swing of writing again on another blog only to find out my grandma is in the hospital for heart issues. First it was my grandpa and now it's my grandma. I'm honestly starting to believe that things really can just keep getting worse instead of better cause nothing ever seems to get better over here. }
#tw; negative#tw; vent#{ Everything just wants to jump on top of me today. }#{ 'Don't worry! Things will get better!' Yeah I don't think so. }#{ It's been one thing after the other lately and honestly? It makes me not wanna do anything anymore. }#{ Catch me throwing myself off a cliff because what else can I do? }#{ Don't mind me trying to cover my irritation with humor. }#{ It's a habit. }#{ And any anons who wanna try to be rude about this or tell me to shut the fuck up- }#{ Y'all couldn't be further from my mind. Like... I don't care about your existence. }#{ You could catch on fire and I would not care because you're clearly a piece of shit anyway so burn. }#{ No skin off my back and I will literally tell you that. }#{ Trust me when I say that I can be ten times more cruel than you can. }#{ I just don't show it here on Tumblr. }#{ But yeah. Regardless... Imma turn your mouth off anyway so if you have something to say to mommy- You can say it to her face. }#✠ [ ' ᴛʜᴇ ᴏɴᴇ ᴡʜᴏ ʟᴇᴀᴅs ʙᴇʜɪɴᴅ ᴄʟᴏsᴇᴅ ᴅᴏᴏʀs. ' ] - ✡ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴏғ ᴄʜᴀʀᴀᴄᴛᴇʀ ✡
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#and I mean. unrelated but when will I finally learn that none of this shit is about me#you guy don't even know. Every time. I spend long fastidiously removing my reading hidden signs goggles off and I shoot it a hundred times#-nd burn it so to destroy it and never be tormented by it again. And the next day before you even know. What's on my face? that's right.#the reading hidden signs goggles#istg if I could step out of my body. If I met my clone. I'd beat the shit out of him. stupid motherfucker.#ok whatever I'm normal and everything is fine.#🦀
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And now a special thanks to our unexpected MVP in tackling The Horrors, let's give it up for SUBSTANCES!!! WOOO-
#vent#mom i love you more than anything but QUIT FUCKING DOOMSCROLLING#“but usually when the news says-” the world is not what you think it is. not anymore. at least someone is telling you that directly#it isnt helping your stress (by your own admission). it sure as FUVK doesnt help mine (do you even realize that?). why are we doing this?#while there are definitely exceptions; i do not fuck with what-ifs anymore. they damn near killed me and did a fine job ruining my life#like. im not mad AT her despite how this sounds. im frustrated by the situation were in. i know what shes feeling and i feel it too#idk wtf well do and that pissed me off in the face of the horrors#im angry we live in a world that casually fucking hates us. call it a victim complex idc. im already crazy.#ill be there for her if she needs it. i really will. but if she could just not make me burn through my edibles so fast thatd be great#personal#chronic illness
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Random sillies from snooping around in the goblin camp. Veldren does flirt as a hobby so they're having a lot of fun with Astarion so far.
Bonus under the cut :
Shadowheart and Lae'zel don't agree on many things except the fact that these two are So Fucking Tiring because they're Like That all the fucking time.
#martin plays bg3#bg3 spoilers#(maybe ? idk)#astarion#bg3 fanart#real talk. Veldren is not the Cliché Bard That Fucks Around All The Time. It's just incredibly funny to flirt to them#and like. idk so far when astarion hasn't been telling me horrible things that happened to him in his past like it's a tuesday#he's been real funny in the flirty sense + he doesn't feel particularly serious#so i think that would 100% make Veldren bounce off of that#it's just fun man#like i'm definitely going to try to romance astarion there's no question here#it's just funny to do it as i rp a character who generally just flirts for fun and WOULD be surprised if it resulted in anything#my art#sketches#there's other fun tidbits about Veldren like#they didn't believe vampires were real for a long time.#in fact they didn't believe vampires were real UNTIL they met astarion.#they weren't phased by the red eyes or whatever like look. Vel's a drow. with red eyes. why would he assume Astarion having red eyes is wei#weird*#the scar on their face is a burn. they fell face first into a fire as a kid. they make shit up when people ask though#because it's funny#they WILL be kind of a dick if it's funny + there's no real consequences#should i tag lae'zel and shadowheart here ? hm. they're#a bonus so probably not.
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i wonder if my ex best friend remembers my birthday every year the way i remember hers
#haven't really thought about her in a while#hope she's well#i don't think she remembers it#i often feel like i'm leaving flowers at the graves of people from my past#lately i've been haunted by thoughts and dreams about people i used to love#and i will always love all of them#no matter how badly i got hurt in the process#a piece of me fractures off when i love someone and i wish they'd keep that piece tucked away somewhere in the closet and dust it off somet#imes. i stil have every letter#every gift every photo every silly thing i've saved over the years#and i know that no one does the same for me#i wonder what my ex did with the drawings i made them after they dumped me for their ex. were they thrown out and forgotten#or maybe did they keep them in a drawer somewhere to find a few years down the line and remember my face. my voice. my laugh#i still have the letter i started writing for them about a week before they left where i was saying i regretted not telling them i loved th#and sometimes i wonder had they seen the finished product if things would be different#my reluctance to admit my love out of fear of being forgotten results in abandonment more often than not#my girlfriend now swears the pattern isn't going to repeat but i've heard that song before and lately i haven't felt safe#and loved the way i once did. she tells me to talk to my therapist. but i don't think it's in my head. i told her if she's thinking of#leaving to just do it now and spare me the pain of love burning out slowly#and maybe she'll listen and that terrifies me#i am my own biggest burden
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