#i kept pulling my hat over my face thats the main way you can tell that im stressed

[yanderespamton78]

the current state of the arg

sorry guys the art isnt arting D:

(btw if youre confused on why i drew turnip like that i was referencing the picrew he did ages ago bc idk it looked fun to draw anddd i dont like taking reference off real life images)

[maddiwrites]

Secrets of the Shore (Chapter 22)

Pairing: JJ x OC

Summary: This is just my rewrite of the show Outer Banks with my own twist by adding another main character which also happens to be John B’s twin sister.

Note: Happy Sunday (: Only two more chapters left and I’m sad about it.

Word Count: 6.8k

Chapter 21 Masterlist

My friends drag each other to Heyward's shed where he stores all his useless junk he'll probably never touch again. I always said Pope's dad was a borderline hoarder. But the clutter does nothing to distract me from what's happening to my brother.

I pace back and forth with my hands interlocked on the top of my head. As I move back and forth, my friends keep their eyes trained on me as if I might sprint back to the airstrip.

No one says anything. The four of us are try to defuse the ticking time bomb thats about to blow in all of our heads without actually losing our minds.

I freeze when I hear the familiar hum of a plane fly overhead. I feel my throat tighten and my face heat with frustration. And just like that, Ward Cameron wins again.

"There goes the gold," Pope says and throws his hat across the room.

"Shit!" JJ kicks the closest thing to him which happens to be a three legged wooden table.

"Fuck!" Pope picks up a metal trash bin and throws it across the room, just like his hat.

"Pope!" Kie yells.

"God damn it!" He continues to throw anything he can find. His bomb exploded and he's destroying anything in his path. "Shit! Fuck!" He finds a wooden baseball bat in the heap of the clutter and hits whatever he can find. Glass tables, wooden chairs, more trash bins. I'm almost mesmerized by his movements because I have never seen this side of Pope before. "Shit! Damn it!"

"Pope!" Kie's trying to clam him down while JJ and I just watch with open mouths and raised brows. However, Pope just ignores her and continues to yell and break shit. "Pope!" I can imagine the release Pope must be feeling from this. All my life, I've never seen him act like this. He's usually so composed, always the one to keep us from doing shit like this. I don't know how to react now that roles are reversed. "Pope!"

Pope eventually falls with exhaustion against the arm of a musty green couch and pants to catch his breath.

"Yeah, dude," JJ says slowly. He puts his hand on Pope's shoulder and squeezes. "I was wondering when this was gonna happen. Here you go, chief." JJ holds out his dab pen for Pope to take. Pope looks at it and for the first time, he actually considers it. "A little weed never hurt no one."

"JJ," Kie says, disapproving.

"Relax, Kie."

"You know he doesn't smoke."

Pope ignores both of them and takes the pen from JJ and inhales a large hit. As if this kid couldn't shock me more today.

"Well, maybe not until today."

"Pope."

"Yeah, what is that gonna help?" Pope says. "I lost my scholarship. Walked out in the middle of the interview. Every -" Pope inhales sharply and shakes his head. "It's gone. It's not gonna happen."

"You did that for us?" Kie asks.

"No, not for us. For nothing."

I never thought of silence as being physically heavy, but right now, I feel like I'm being weighed down by a thick fog that I can't swim out of. Pope's right. Despite everything we did right this summer to get something we all deserve, we ended up with nothing except for more problems.

"I'm here for you, Pope," JJ says. "Welcome to my world, okay?"

Kie looks at me for some kind of assistance, but I have nothing to offer. She sighs and looks back at the boys. "JJ -"

"What, Kie? He's right. It doesn't matter anymore."

"You don't have to do that," Kie tells Pope and motions to the weed.

"What do you care?" Pope snaps.

Before this can get any worse, I turn at the sound of footsteps approaching us. My jaw physically hits the ground, at least that's what it feels like, when I see John B.

His eyes are facing forward and his clothes are covered in blood. He looks like he's in some kind of state of shock and I am terrified to find out why.

But my sisterly instincts kick in first. I'm running to him before the others even see him and my hands are pulling his shirt up to make sure the blood isn't his. John B reacts as if I'm not even there and stares ahead.

"John B what happened?" My voice shakes as my eyes scan his body. There's not a even a scratch on him, but I almost wish there was. Because this means the blood belongs to someone else, and I don't want to think that my brother is the reason for it.

"Dude! Dude, you good?" JJ runs up behind me and looks over John B's body with big eyes.

"Oh, my God! John B!"

"Is this yours?"

"Whose blood is that?"

I cup John B's face in my hands and make him look at me. When his eyes finally find mine, I ask, "What happened?"

Before he can answer, cop cars with their sirens on pass us on the road behind us. John B grabs me by the arm and shoves us all back into the shed and we duck behind a wooden slack.

"Shit," Pope curses as his chest moves up and down heavily.

When the coast is clear, John B tells us what happened. Sheriff Peterkin showed up. At first Ward thought she was going to arrest John B for breaking into the airstrip and almost causing a catastrophic accident, but she was there to arrest Ward. Of course Ward wasn't going to go down without a fight and before Peterkin could react, she was shot in the chest. By none other than Rafe Cameron.

"Rafe shot Sheriff Peterkin?" I ask in disbelief.

I always thought Rafe was a lot of things, but I never had cop killer written down on my list. However, I do know that Rafe is the kind of kid who would do absolutely anything to impress his dad. He's been fighting for his attention since he was a tween. Maybe in his own sick way, he thought killing Peterkin was saving his dad.

John B nods. He tells us Peterkin told him to run. And as much as he didn't want to, he was better off with us than dead. Sarah even told him to go as she protected him with her own body while he ran away. Rafe tried to shoot him too but couldn't get his aim down as he sprinted through the woods to get to us.

"What?" I feel my blood turn ice cold when I think about Rafe trying to kill my brother. The one family member I have left. "Why would Rafe want to kill you too?"

John B shrugs. "Because I saw the whole thing."

"So did his sister," I say. "Do you think Sarah is okay?"

"Rafe wouldn't hurt her."

I scoff. "Yeah right."

Now I know that Rafe is pretty much capable of anything worthy to an eternity in hell.  I don't think anyone is safe in his company. Not even Sarah. Maybe Ward.

"Kie, can you give me a ride somewhere?" John B asks.

We sneak through the back roads to get to Kie's house. When we get in her car, John B directs her to the police station. By the time we get there, the sun is completely set, blanketing the town in an eery indigo color.

Everything seems so silent to me now. The hum of Kie's radio, the shuffling of leaves brushing against each other, the bickering between my friends and brother. There's a ringing in my ear that won't go away until my hands are wrapped around Rafe's neck.

I feel like my brain as been replaced by a dark cloud. No ideas, no thoughts, no plans can make me feel any better or lighter. It's like an invisible hand has reached down my throat and twisted my heart right out of my chest.

Peterkin was the one and only person that actually helped John B and I. She kept DCS off our backs for as long as she could, she never rubbed it mine or John B's face that the whole island thought we were delusional when we said our dad was coming back, and she was even going to arrest Ward Cameron for my father's murder.

She didn't deserve to die. Although I wasn't the one who pulled the trigger, I can't help but think that her death is somehow my fault. It was my family she was protecting. She was doing her job, but she could have easily written my dad's death off as an accident like every other cop on this island.

"John B, what are we doing at the police station?" JJ asks when Kie parks the car right outside of the front entrance.

"Somebody's gotta tell them what happened." John B's voice is filled with sadness and guilt. I wish I could pull all this weight off his shoulders and add it to mine. He use to be so optimistic - always the one to cheer me up. Now that it's the other way around, I'm dumbfounded on what to do.

Pope takes another hit of JJ's juul and ends up coughing most of the hit up.

"Oh," JJ says from his seat behind Pope and pats his shoulder twice. "Easy there, chief. Damn."

I ignore the fact that Pope sounds like he's hacking up a lung and turn to look at my brother.

"Are you sure?" I ask him.

"All right. I'm just gonna be real with you right now," JJ says to my brother. "You might end up in the lion's den, but you don't go there on purpose. It's fundamental. Just like my old man always told me, you should never ever trust cops, no matter what the circumstance is."

I scoff at the idea of taking advice from JJ's dad.

"Your old man's an abusive liar," Kie says, looking through the rearview mirror with a scowl on her face.

"I agree with JJ," Pope says. "Fuck the police."

Kie turns to look at him. "You going dark side now?"

"When's the last time the police helped us?" Pope says.

"Peterkin looked out for me, all right?" John B says loud enough to grab everyone's attention. "Tried to, at least." He looks at me. "They need to know."

John B steps out of the car with his head hanging low on his shoulders. I bite down on my bottom lip, contemplating what our next move should be. All I know is that I can't let him do this by himself.

"Wait, John B!" I jump out of the car and follow him to the front door. "You're not going to do this alone."

I wait for John B to argue with me but he doesn't. Instead, he nods his head and leads me into the police station, a place I've been in a couple times by force. Never by choice.

There's a woman at the front desk who looks exhausted and busy. I can hear the mumbling of her radio on her desk and the static after each statement. I'm pretty sure I hear Peterkin's name but I don't know if it's my own head repeating her name over and over again.

"Um...excuse me, ma'am," John B says.

The woman barely looks up from her desk and writes something down on her pad of paper in front of her. "This is not a good time, kid." Had she just taken the time to look up, she would see the guy standing in front of her is covered in blood. Maybe then, she would be more worried. Instead, she focuses on her radio. "Adam, advise if you need air tran."

I open my mouth to give this woman a piece of my mind, but John B cuts me off. His voice soft and broken. "I know who shot the Sheriff."

I force myself to look up at him. He looks like he's trying his best to keep himself composed when all I know he wants to do is collapse on the nearest chair and just...breathe.

The woman freezes and finally takes in John B's appearance. She studies the stain on his shirt and the sweat on his skin, the hollowness behind his eyes and his shaky hands.

"You stay put," She says as she backs away. "I'll get a deputy."

I look around the station and feel an uneasy swirling motion in my stomach. It's unsettling. Like JJ's words are getting in my head. Maybe coming to the cops wasn't such a good idea.

My head snaps towards the radio when it statics to life again. "Central, three Vick. We have a suspect in our 31. John Routledge."

My blood runs cold and my eyes flash up to meet John B's. He's staring down at the radio like it's an actual person and he's frozen in shock.

Another woman's voice comes up on the radio. "Copy that. All units, be on the lookout for John B Routledge."

"Sixteen year old white male. Six foot. Last seen wearing board shorts, a 'Bad Brains' T shirt, and a faded red hoodie."

"Copy that."

My hands grab John B's to drag him out of here. My head scrambles to come up with our best plan, but I know staying here isn't it. Ward somehow managed to spin this around on my brother. I shouldn't be shocked, but I keep managing to be knocked out with more surprises right when I think things couldn't get any worse.

Just as I'm about to pull John B out of there, two cops come out from the back and stare at the two of us with big eyes. A man and woman dressed in their faded brown deputy uniforms. My eyes trail down to their hands that are both steady on the gun in their holster, ready to aim if they need to.

"Just...breathe. All right?" The woman cops holds out her hand as if to tell John B to stay calm.

The other officer nods. "John B. Do what she says."

"Look, I didn't...I didn't do it, okay?" John B tries to explain but his voice his shaky and lacks any sort of confidence.

"Dont...move."

"Go..." My voice is barely a hushed whisper but my tug on his arm is strong. "Go, go, go. Run!"

John B and I sprint out of the station before any officers can guard the door. I can barely hear them yelling after us through the drumming in my ears.

"Kie! Start the car!" John B yells as we basically body slam ourselves into her car. "Start the car, Kie!"

I basically rip the back door open and stumble into JJ's lap after tripping on my own feet. Everyone's yelling. The people in the car. The people running out of the police station.

"What? John B!" Kie yells as her hands shake. She tries putting the keys back into the ignition but her hands are trembling too much.

"The cops!"

"Shit!" JJ curses and looks over my shoulder at the cops who are sprinting towards us.

"Go!" John B yells at her. She turns the key but of course the car decides not to start. "Kie, drive! Go!"

"Go Kie!" Now I'm yelling at her.

"Stop the car!" One of the cops yell with her gun raised at the back window.

"I'm going! I'm sorry!" Kie says as anxiety cripples through her.

"Right now!" The woman cop from inside approaches the car. She tries to open it but the door is locked.

"What did you do?" Kie yells at us.

Kie moves the vehicle slowly out of the parking lot, but the woman is relentless. She runs with us side by side and hooks her fingers around the door handle.

"Open it!" JJ yells at John B.

John B opens the door to knock the cop off the car. The tactic works and she rolls on the ground. Only now we'll probably be written up for assault too.

I fall back into my seat and pant for breath. My head falls back against the cushioned seat and my eyes close. Okay, okay, think, Marleigh. Think.

Ward killed my dad. Ward stole my gold. Rafe killed Peterkin. And somehow, my brother is the one being framed for murder. Make it all make sense.

I hate them. The Camerons. Kooks. All entitled, greedy sons of bitches who don't know how to handle rejection or the word 'no.' They think all their meals should be served on a silver platter and kids like us are born for the sole purpose to serve them. They deserve to rot. They deserve to feel all the pain we do.

And yet, they don't. And they never will because that's the life we live. A life where people like Ward and Rafe Cameron can get a way with murder because no one would blink twice at their lame excuse of a story.

A lie.

It all boils down to money. Money we almost had right in our pockets. But now it's gone as is pretty much everything else in my life. My house. My dad. Maybe now my brother.

JJ laces his fingers with mine and gives my hand a gentle squeeze. I keep my eyes closed but let my head fall on his shoulder. I focus on his touch. How his thumb delicately rubs against my skin in a light up and down motion. How his lips are able to make my heart flutter when they kiss the top of my head. How his soft whispers, telling me everything is going to be okay, are sweet enough to make me melt into a buttery mess.

Maybe not everything's gone. I still have JJ. The constant in my life. The one who can always make me feel better even in the shittiest of situations. My sun on my darkest nights. My sight into the future when I can't even think of tomorrow.

I don't let JJ go. Even when Kie parks the car back at Heyward's shed under an open roof. We have literally nowhere else to go. The cops will undoubtedly check all of our homes, including Kie's. The Chateau is definitely surrounded by cops, waiting for John B and I to make the dumb move of going back there. And Tannyhill isn't an option anymore.

The sun is already poking out behind the trees as morning approaches. My body aches from sleeping in this cramped car, but I try to ignore the pain and focus on the fact that we're all still together. For now.

The five of us sit in silence. Some of us try to wrap our heads around what just happened and try to come up with another plan. The rest of us, like me, are so tired, they can't even remember what their middle name is.

The only noise in the car comes from Kie's radio. "...should be functional within twenty four hours." Meanwhile, another cop car with loud sirens pass us on the road without sparing this car a second glance. "And still, no arrest in the shooting death of Sheriff Susan Peterkin. The state police have issued a statement regarding a local person of interest, a juvenile from -"

Kie switches the radio off and glances back at John B and I. My brother has his seat reclined all the way back and is staring up the at the ceiling of the car. JJ has moved so his back is against the car door with one leg bent at the back of the seat and the other one on the floor. I sit between his legs and play with the necklace he gave me a couple days ago. Crazy enough, it feels like years since he gifted me this.

"Let's game this out," JJ is the first to speak. He looks at Kie and Pope in the front seat. "Maybe you guys can help, being the smart ones and all, but..." He sighs. "...who are the cops going to believe? Ward Cameron or us? So the accuser is a big shot developer, kind of lord of the island, got the governor on speed dial kind of person, and the accused...is John B, who is...pretty much a homeless sixteen year old boy at the moment."

"Thanks." John B deadpans.

"Okay, man. Yucatan, all right? I'm saying that's the only option." John B gives him a look to stop talking but of course JJ doesn't take the hint. "What other options do you have?"

"Enough with the Mexico bullshit," Kie says.

"Sarah will bail me out," John B says a lot more confidently than I feel about the situation.

"She did witness the whole thing," Kie says.

"Thank you."

"You really think she's going to pick you over her own family?" I can't help the attitude that drips off my tongue with each word. Sarah's a nice girl and I really liked her. But Rafe and Ward are her family. "No offense, but you've really only known each other for a few weeks."

"Not happening, bro. Okay?" JJ says, agreeing with me. "We gotta get you off the island."

"The ferry," Pope speaks up for the first time all morning. "It's the only way."

"Exit stage left while you still can. Before the entire island is on lockdown."

"Guys, just get down," Kie slumps further into her seat as another round of sirens pass us.

"Sarah's not a Pogue, John B," Pope says. He has a point. Sarah hasn't been friends with all of us for that long. I almost wouldn't even blame her if she took her family's side.

"Yeah. You can't stay here, man," JJ says, tightening his hold on me.

Another moment of silence passes through us and I wonder if JJ's right. Adrenaline on the island is at an all time high. No cop, no lawyer, no person is going to believe John B over Ward. Not without evidence. We need time to clear John B's name. So maybe getting him off the island would be best. Even if it's just temporary.

~ ~ ~

When Kie parks in front of the ferry, Pope hops out to buy the tickets and Kie moves to the passenger seat. I offered to go with him but JJ told me that was a bad idea because I would get recognized as John B's sister.

So here I am, useless and laying down as flat as I can next to John B to avoid being seen through the windows.

I look at John B. His eyes are closed and his chest moves heavily up and down. His fingers flex and clench into fists every couple of seconds. I wonder if his fractured hand is starting to hurt him.

"The first thing we're doing when we get off this stupid island is buying you a new outfit," I say. I cringe in disgust when I look at Peterkin's blood stain on his clothes. Another reminder that she's dead.

I look up to the front seat window when Pope comes back to the car. He's mumbling to himself and I think he has something in his hand.

"Okay. All right, no."

"Pope, can you act normal?" Kie says through clenched teeth and unlocks the door for Pope to get in.

"Okay, um...okay, so, bad news. The ferry's closed, and there is this."

Kie takes a piece of paper from his hand and looks at it. Her eyes close for half a second and she shakes her head. "Shit."

"What is that? What is this?" John B asks.

JJ snags the paper out of Kie's hand and looks at it. "Well, John B, uh...this is a good framer of you." He turns the paper over and shows my brother and I a picture of John B on a 'WANTED' sign with a cash reward of $25,000.

"Okay, so the whole island's looking for John B right now," Pope says.

"That's a lot of money," I can't help but laugh. "Gotta say, John B. Didn't think you would be worth that much. Hell, maybe I'll turn you in."

"Congratulations John B, you're famous," JJ says.

John B slaps the outside of my thigh with the back of his hand. I scoff and slap him back, which causes a strings of slaps and hits, though mostly playful, and some a little harder.

"Stop. Guys, stop!" Kie says loudly. JJ pulls my hands away from my brother and folds them in my lap. He gives me a warning look, like a teacher would their student, and it makes me want to laugh about how bizarre this whole thing is. "We got to get to the HMS. We need small, no running lights -"

"It's at the Chateau, Kie," John B says.

"And I wonder if the cops got the entire place taken out," JJ says sarcastically. "Let me think. Oh, yeah. No. they definitely have that place locked down."

"Let me think. Just give me a second," John B says frustratingly.

"JJ," Pope says.

"What?" He looks up.

"Does your dad still have the boat? The cigarette boat, the Phantom. The one he used to race."

I look up at JJ, but I can't read his emotions. He keeps his face unfazed. "Maybe."

"You could get right up the coast, no problem. Okay, look - "

"It won't be easy, Pope."

"The surf's running from three to four."

"I don't know where the keys are."

"Well, find them."

"I'm thinking," JJ snaps.

"Why is nobody moving forward?" Pope yells at the car in front of us and bangs the palm of his hand on the steering wheel.

I rub my fingers in a circular motion on my temples and close my eyes again. Words are being spat at about a million miles per hour. It's hard to keep up and my blood vessels twist with anxiety.

"Can you relax?" Kie hisses. "JJ, how much weed did you give him?"

"Guys," John B says. "Your car's on the poster."

Pope ignores everyone and hits his fist against the horn of the car. "Can we move it?"

"Pope!"

I'm going to puke.

"Come on!"

"Don't honk the horn!" Kie says, hitting Pope's arms away from the wheel.

"It's that guy. Right there!" I hear a voice outside our window say. The voice sounds young. Kid-like.

"Shit," John B tries pushing himself further into his seat. I didn't even realize he sat up in the first place.

"We got a snitch. Pope, turn the car on," JJ says, sitting up in his seat and leaning forward to hit Pope on the shoulder.

"We get $25,000 if we find him!" The kid says.

"Hey! He's right there!" Another voice. Manly. Great, we're drawing a crowd.

"Hey! We gotta go!" Kie yells.

"Pope, go!" I yell.

"Turn the car on!" JJ yells.

We're all yelling and I think my eardrums might burst.

"I found him first!" The kid says to the man.

"Hell you did, you little bastard!"

"Pope, turn the frickin' car on!" JJ yells.

The crowd starts growing around the car. John B turns into my side and pulls his hood up over his head.

"I am trying!" Pope yells back at us.

"Turn the car on!"

"Go, go, go!"

Pope jerks the car forward and hits the car in front of us. I jolt forward in the middle seat and stop myself from going through the windshield by pressing my two arms on the front two seats.

I hear the crowd gasp and move backwards to avoid the nutso in the front seat. Now that I think about it, who let Pope drive in the first place?

"Pope! Jeez!" JJ curses.

"Dude, back up!" Kie yells.

Pope puts the car in reverse and steps on the gas, but hits another car in the process.

"Hey!"

"The other way!"

JJ pats Pope's shoulder again. "It's okay! Pope, just go!"

Pope hits the corner of Kie's front bumper against the car in front of us again but continues to step on the gas until we're completely out of our spot.

"What are you doing?" Kie yells at him.

"We'll bump out!"

"Watch out!" I yell when I spot a couple of people crossing the street before Pope can kill them.

"Whoa! Whoa! Watch out!" Pope yells and swings his hands in front of him to motion for the people to jump out of the way. "Watch out!" My back hits the back of my seat, hard. Pope has the audacity to laugh. Head back and all. "Oh my god."

"Pope!" Kie yells. "What the fuck?"

"I'm living my best life right now," Pope says through laughter.

Kie slumps in her seat. "My mom's gonna kill me."

"I should be the last to say this, but you are not okay to drive," JJ says. I turn to glare at him and he puts his hands up in the air to surrender. He looks back out to the road and yells, "Stop!"

Pope stomps on the brakes and sends us skidding to a stop. JJ's arm whips out to the right to stop me from flying forward.

We're gonna die.

Pope looks over his shoulder at my brother. "John B, get out."

"What?" I glare.

"He's right," JJ says and my head snaps to him. He ignores me. "We'll draw the cops, you run."

"Shit," John B curses and unbuckles himself.

"I'll get the rig, and I'll meet you in the dump tomorrow, okay? Three o'clock, okay?"

"Wait, I'm coming with you," I say, but John B shakes his head.

"No. You stay here. Stay with them."

"I'm not leaving you!" I fight back and look at him like he has two heads. He must think I'm crazy if he thinks I'm going to let him run away by himself.

"JJ -" John B looks at him.

"On it. Go!" JJ's hands wrap around my waist, forcing me to stay in the car. I try prying his fingers off of me, but he's a lot stronger than I am. John B starts running off. "Three tomorrow at the dump!" When John B disappears behind the tree, JJ finally lets me go. I turn around and shove him back by his chest and slide over to the seat that John B was just in. JJ sighs and looks forward again. "Come on, go, go, go!"

Pope steps on the gas again and veers forward.

I look out the window and ignore the queasiness that has fully taken over my stomach. I know John B and JJ were right to keep me in the car. I would only slow John B down and get myself in trouble and therefore, be completely useless in helping my brother. But I can't shake the feeling that I'm abandoning him.

~ ~ ~

Pope, for some reason, is still driving. I don't know where he's going but it seems like we're on our way to Figure Eight. Pope turns on the radio, blasting one of North Carolina's hip hop stations.

JJ leans forward in the middle seat and pushes his head between Kie and Pope. He's managing to laugh like we're on some joy ride on Memorial Day weekend. "Pope, you clocked that car, man. Like that was so bad!" JJ shakes his head. "I'm just glad I'm not driving now."

" Pull over." Kie tells Pope. "JJ, it's not funny. He shouldn't be driving."

JJ grimaces. "Mama's mad."

Pope pulls the car over and switches seats with Kie. A delirious grin stays on the high boy's lips as he settles in the passenger seat.

"What are you -"

"Where are we going?" I ask Kie as she makes a familiar right turn.

"The last place they're gonna look." Kie says.

~ ~ ~

By the time Kie pulls up to Tannyhill, the sun has disappeared into the horizon and the pit of my stomach is the size of a category five hurricane. I can't remember the last time I ate or drank anything and the pounding in my head feels like a hundred bullets are penetrating my skull.

Kie's brilliant idea is to somehow get to Sarah and convince her to go to the police to confess what actually happened.

"Perfectly focused," Pope says to himself, which makes me glare at him. Pope is anything but focused.

"You sure this is a good idea?" JJ says.

"She's the only one who can clear John B," Kie says.

"Last place they'll look because of how stupid it is."

Kie ignores JJ and gets out of the car with Pope following right behind her. When I open the door, JJ pulls me back and closes the door again.

I look at him. My first reaction is to be concerned. Something in JJ's expression makes me fold. For a second I forget the mess we're in and I get lost in his blue eyes. It's just me and JJ and the world outside of this car no longer exists.

His warm hand wraps around my smaller one and he pulls me closer into him. His other hand cups my face, right underneath my jaw. My face feels like it's physically sparkling with the touch of his breath and forget butterflies - there is a zoo in the pit of my stomach. I glide into JJ like magnet.

His lips press into mine and I cave in. I pull him close enough to where I'm straddling him. Time stops as does my breathing. My fingers run through his blonde hair, tugging on the ends. He stifles back a moan and my face flushes pink.

I pull back for breath and rest my forehead against his. I don't know how many more times we're going to get to do that. And it hurts me thinking it might come to an end.

"I'm sorry," I say.

JJ ignores me. "When we get to Yucatan, we're getting a bungalow. We're going to live in bathing suits and get drunk off of pina coladas every day. Skinny dipping is going to be our main source of exercise - well, other than the hot dangerous sex we're gonna have every night. I'm never going to leave your side and I'm going to keep you safe until the day we die. In a few years, we'll get married. You're gonna wear that dress you wore to Midsummers and we're gonna have beautiful beach babies who will go on to win surfing championships by the time they're ten because they're going to be prodigies. Our prodigies. And John B is going to be there with us. Because he's not going to jail for a crime he didn't commit. Okay?"

I don't even realize tears are streaming down my face until he's wiping his thumb against my wet cheek.

"Promise?" My voice cracks and I really wish it didn't. But that's the life I want. That's the life I need. I don't care if it's in Yucatan or in the middle of a deserted island. I just need my boys, Kie, and Pope.

JJ kisses my left cheek. Then my right and my nose. "I promise."

"I love you, J."

"And I love you. Everything is going to be okay. I'm going to make sure you're okay."

"Okay."

"Okay?"

"Okay."

JJ laughs. "Okay."

As much as I don't want to leave him, as much as I'd rather stay here with JJ and forget about all our problems, I know I can't. Because Kie is probably freaking out, waiting for me. Because John B is on the run somewhere and I need to do something, anything to help him.

"I should probably..."

JJ rolls his eyes playfully. "Yeah I know. Be quick. Okay?"

I nod and jump out of the car before my head or my heart can make me do otherwise. I push my legs, that feel like rubber, over the stone wall that lines the Cameron's property.

I stop in my tracks when I hear Pope and Kie in some kind of intense conversation...well as intense as Pope can handle right now. I think he's still super high.

"Pope! Pope! Pope! Sh!" Kie says in a hushed tone.

"Hey, I'm trying to tell you, I love you."

Oh shit. I look at the stone wall I just jumped over and consider jumping back over it to avoid eavesdropping on this conversation.

"First of all, I need you to be quiet," Kie says.

"Okay, yeah. Quiet, I mean -"

"No. Stop talking, like, now." Kie says. This time, Pope doesn't speak. "Second of all...thank you for saying that."

I can't help but physically cringe at that statement. Because I know what's coming next.

"Okay," Pope chuckles.

"Now, that's very sweet, but it's - look it's not gonna happen."

"Okay, well, why not?"

This is like a car wreck you can't look away from. I had a feeling Pope was in love with Kie for years now. But he never acted on it. Didn't even flirt with her the way JJ did before we were together. A part of me always hoped he did. Because I wanted to see how Kie would react. I think the two of them would be really cute together. Kie could teach Pope to take more risks and Pope could give her a beautiful life that didn't require her working for her parents forever. They compliment each other. Always have.

"Because Pogues can't mack on other Pogues."

Pope scoffs. "That rule doesn't make sense, and nobody follows it. I mean look at JJ and Marleigh -"

"Look, I - I want something different."

"Okay, I-"

"I - I wanna go to Antartica, and I wanna ride camels..."

"I want to do those things with you."

"No. Pope, it's not gonna work."

"I want to be that person!"

"No. It's not gonna happen," Kie shakes her head. God, this is brutal. I can't wait to tell JJ. "Do you understand what I'm saying? Like..." Kie sighs. "Look, I know that that's really hard to hear right now, but we don't have time for this, and this is a really bad place to do it." She pauses and Pope doesn't respond. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah..." He says, but his voice has completely changed. It's dark and cold and doesn't match my Pope's personality.

"Are you ready for the plan, or..."

"Yeah."

"Okay..." Kie says and this is when I decide to make my entrance. I can't help with the situation at hand but at least I can cause a distraction.

So I cough. "Sorry for the hold up. JJ and I were just fighting over who has to be look out. So..." I force myself to look between Pope and Kie as if I didn't just witness their whole conversation. I try not to focus on the tear streak down Pope's cheek and look at Kie. "Ready?"

Kie nods and leads us towards the Cameron's. A house I almost called my home.

Kie is in charge of getting to Sarah Cameron by her bedroom window while I stay with Pope and create a distraction. We decided it was best if one of us stayed with Pope so I offered myself, considering what I just watched.

Pope still seems to be upset. He's not exactly being quiet trying to stay hidden like we should be.

"Gotta stick to the plan," Pope mumbles to himself and plays with the grill. I find the closest pillow on their patio set and place it on top of it. "I like camels. I like Antartica."

"Pope..." I say softly. The last thing I want is to piss him off more but he's making me nervous.

He ignores me. "What's wrong with that plan?" He bends down and picks up a rubber duck in a paramedic costume and looks at it thoughtfully. "Same." I don't know exactly what that means but he throws the duck into the grill and finds the lighter fluid. When he saturates the pillow...and duck, he turns the grill on. The fluid quickly ignites and flames shoot out from the grill. Pope's head is close enough to the fire that his hat catches on fire. "Shit!"

"Holy shit," I throw my arm at his head and knock the hat off of him. I stomp on it until the flame dies under my sneakers and pull him behind the closest tree that can hide us both.

Less than a minute later, I hear two pairs of footsteps come out. I recognize Ward's voice as he curses at the destructed grill until he stops and mutters the name "Sarah" under his breath and makes a beeline back in side.

Taglist: @notyourcupofteax @acvross-the-universe @jjmaybankzz @moniamaybank @realistic-breadstick @urbinoutfiters @jeeperky @brebear121 @x-lulu @freddymaybank @jjpouggues @lemur46 @is-it-really-a-secret @kkmikayla @folkloverr @alexa-playafricabytoto @jjxrudy @migilini @stellarskys @rochyu @itsagurl @dazzlingnights 

[redcreekstudios]

Red Creek: dark realm Chapter 4: i see demons

Warning: this story contains, violance, weapons, death, suicide, gore, horror aspects, and other forms of death and horror, talk of spirits religion and the underworld and things manifested in between. if not prepared do not read i wouldnt want anyone to get triggered the grass stood still but tall enough to where you couldn't see the ground, as the grass led to the cabin, beaten battered as if it stood in a million wars murders before it. Clark would have his eye twitch as he saw a shadow man rise from the ground and look twords Clark and crick its neck as if it where broken by something. more bodies of shadows rose up, some had pieces broken off parts of limbs and parts of their face were missing. Clark shivered a bit and saw his breath in the cold air as he kept his eye on the cabin but was distracted by the whispers of the disembodied people. some of them were kind others tormented by hate and loss "you have nice eyes" whispered one "kill kill kill" said another "you haven't lost your mind?" asked one as the voices got louder and he felt a hand touch his shoulder and he looked back holding his gun to Marcus's chest "GAH!-" his breath had left him and he sighed "damn it im-...im sorry" he continued to apologize and he looked back to the cabin as Marcus was scared but wasn't terrified "Deputy i think it is time to leave" he said as he looked at the sky as the sky burned orange "you know the legend of mountain man deputy im sure Otis told ya mountain mans out here we gotta go" he said sounding more afraid as the sky almost looked empty with a few clouds overhead as well, the whispers had stopped but one sounded like a girl and it caught Clark's attention "hi Clark...i miss you" it said as he looked in the window of the cabin and there was another shadow figure tall slender and its head tilted like all the others "it'll be to late before we get back, the cabin is our only shot. ill take first look" he said slowly making his way and he looked at Marcus "come on" he said as the sun had set on the right of the left of the mountain and the moon slowly had risen from the grave as Marcus followed. the silence was broken by a grunt and a kick and the door swung open and Clark held his gun up and his flashlight "what the hell..." he said taking a step inside and looked at the walls and table with a metal tea set and skeleton hand rested clutching a knife, "this place is pure evil..." Marcus said as he slowly closed the door and he rubbed his hands together "i dont suppose you have a lighter?" he said as Clark was crouched on the floor and ran his fingers against the floor "...dried blood? or...something else" he said as he looked to Marcus "oil lantern is on the table along with this furnace and appears to be a second one in the room down the hall" Clark said and shifted his sleeve on his arms and sighed "ill check it out" he said handing him a metal lighter "hurry up ok?" he said to Marcus nodded and got to it as Clark slowly made his way to the backrooms two doors both of which were bedrooms. in his dream the room was on the left so he opened it slowly with his gun drawn and held his flashlight up and and he looked around the room "this place...its...sad" he said feeling a sadness and force around his chest as he walked in further and saw a music box along with a toy box and cradle "a child? this...this is impossible" he said looking at the bookshelf and narrowing his eyes "this place...inst even on any maps of trails nor towns" he said as he heard shuffling behind him and a dismembered laugh as he held his gun up and looked around "hey Marcus?!" he called out as he heard a reply "yeah?" he called back as Clark looked at the ceiling and there was a hole and what looked like a hand sliding away from it above "is that fire started?!" he asked and Marcus slowly opened the door with his boot and Clark saw the light of the lantern and out of fear jumped and put his gun in its holster "...knock next time but good work" he said walking out of the room and into the

main entrance room and sat at the table "so deputy why is it you dragged me out here?" he said raising a brow and opened his bag pulling out a

bottle of whiskey and two glasses, Clark looked at the bottles and took his hat off and set it to the side "well if i told you id sound like Otis or just crazy" he said laughing at himself a bit

looking to Marcus as he poured their drinks "oh come on deputy ive heard crazier stories by that old hag and more importantly i wont tell anyone even if you were crazy" he said sliding his glass to Clark, he looked at it and took it drinking it and put it back on the table "well...i saw this place in a dream" he leaned back in his seat as Marcus chuckled a bit "well explain this dream to me" he said already finished his shot "well it was like i was here but their was a family and a father mother and their child but it was off their was a presence like...like something bad was going to happen" he said putting his hands together and pumped his foot a bit as he looked out the window "and what happened next its...its a blur" he said looking to Marcus as he finished another shot "sure...hey you said a family right? husband and his wife along with his kid?" he said raising an eyebrow "sounds like the Becker family" Marcus said as he hooked the lantern on a pole sticking out of the wall "legend has it the wife was forced into the marriage but didn't speak much and they had a child...they were only one when they died poor guy..." he said as Clark had a look of confusion "wait like mountain man?" he ask pointing his finger twords him and narrowed his eyes again "no no mountain man was long dead after this it was around say 1818? but it was after the mountain man story thats for sure" he said as he looked to Clark "but as i was saying the wife and the child were in danger they had this house built but the husband didn't know, so the wife takes the child with her" he continued saying and took another drink, the crackling of firewood and flames could be heard in the corner "the husband found them though and luckily enough he came alone, but the man enters and well with a gun and fires a shot hitting the wall to my your left but was killed by a swing of the axe by his wife" he said and looked down "as for the child?" Clark asked as Marcus looked up swirling his glass "the bullet...went through...the wall..." he said as he rose a brow and Clark felt a stir inside his stomach "horrible" he said pushing his glass away" Marcus nodded and looked to the fire "as for the wife? she disappeared into the woods never to be seen again" he said as some sparks flew from the furnace "wandering looking for her lost child...forever" it started to get really dark outside as the moon had peaked in the sky "im going to sleep now alright?" asked Marcus and he set out his sleeping bag and slept on the floor, the fire from the furnace would keep the house warm but the second one was still needed, so he went back into the kids room and looked at the cradle and had tears in his eyes as he filled the furnace and heard a voice "i was watching her" it said as Clark stood up and looked to the window and saw the mountain man standing tall as his coat covered his body with his satchel and wooden mask with antlers his lantern lighting up his side a bit "the woman had no choice" Clark felt his heart race and watched him "y-you can...talk" he asked the man and he chuckled a bit "so it seems but i never thought you'd hear me" he said as he set the lantern on the table "my curse is what you see my soul trapped in the hands of hell" Clark tilted his head "c-curse? hell? soul? what?" the man nodded "yes you'll see soon enough i grant you a night of peace" he said before Clark blinked and he was gone again and Clark finally lit the fire and looked at the bookshelf seeing a brown book and it had gold lining and he took it "property of Rose Becker" he flipped through pages and their were scriptures legends prophecies and other kinds of beast monsters demons angels souls and relics within them "what the hell...was she crazy or was she...doing something" he said before taking it out of the room and into the room Marcus was sleeping in ad sat down watching the fire. the dawn of a new day slowly casted over the cabin and Marcus awoke and sat up "deputy?" he said seeing Clark half asleep leaning on the table "Jesus deputy did you sleep at all?" he said as he got up and packed

his things "yeah im fine just couldn't sleep as hard as you can haha" he laughed a bit and yawned as he got up slowly, they left the cabin and he saw in the window the girl pressed against the window and he heard her whisper again "dont leave me..." it said as Clark looked back from the treeline "ill figure it out..." he said to himself as Marcus looked back "say something?" he said as Clark watched the shadow dissipate into nothing "n-no just lets go" he said as they walked away and made it back into town and he was dropped off in town and Clark would wave him off as he looked at his hand and the book "i need answers" he said to himself before walking in town and made his way to a school and looked at it as the sky flickered red again and he looked forward at himself in the reflection and was scared of himself as he waited for the bell of the church to ring

[faithylilac]

The Party Party Part 6

So... there was a bit of a situation... a very bad situation. Not a terrible situation, Faithy and Echo are doing quite lovely.

“Well we wouldn’t have been in this mess if I was the party leader!” Dax shouted at the shorter god. She simply huffed and started tapping her foot.

“Well I didn’t see you throwing any ideas around!” She looked around the dark cave they were in, double checking for a way out. “You twat” she said off handedly.

Dax’s eyes widen, sure what he said was rude... but not to deserve that.

What happened between the two residential celestial beings?

There they were, five papers spread across the floor, each with a different task. Cj explained that they decided to pick up side jobs to do on the way to wedding. Ash and Jo had realized they would be a week early if they went straight there, so this was a perfect idea.

Faithy just shrugged her shoulders. She wasn’t party leader anymore so if anything happened, it wasn’t her fault.

“Wait which one is first on the list?” Dax finally decided to pipe in, as he knew he was free of compasses.

Carter held up their’s proudly, “we’re going after this thing called the uh....” he quickly flipped the paper around to read, “Mortem Spera... I don’t know if I said that right.”

“What is it exactly?” Ash asked. Carter read some more and shrugged. Apparently no information on it... weird.

Carter on the other hand, was having a tougher time that the two gods. Both of Ash’s and Jo’s cloaks were ripped to shreds. So their ears were out and the open, reminding Carter plenty of what they truly were.... Nyah Nyah kawaii anime cat people.

Jo had on a large hat, thank Gjhar feiiled, but her tail was sticking out. Ash on the other hand was a free cat boy, disgusting...

Carter was scurrying to look for a blind fold, make it out of anything... But there was hinderance to that plan.

“So Carter... Do you like oranges?”

Carter pulled all of his mental strength to not freak out that this cat girl was speaking to him. He took a deep breath and shut his eyes tight. “Why?” Jo just blinked at him. “I don’t want to answer that” carter continued. “I swear it’s not a deez nuts joke.” Jo replied. Carter kinda just roll his eyes but not, being that they are closed. “Kinda... but that’s so random— I’m confused.”

Jo giggle, “I just wanted to know if you liked oranges.” She replied. “I don’t hate oranges.”

“Anyway, I guess you can ask questions about me, or I can ask more about you— whatever you are more comfortable with.”

Carter shrugged, walking past her to pick up something he spotted once he opened his eyes. It was a clothe that was sticking out of rubble. “Uhhhh...” The nymph examined the clothe, it was embroidered with strange writing and lots of stars.

“Ash, you’ve studied a few ancient languages right?” Jo looked over him to find him staring at a large tapestry on the other part of the cave.

“No, where did you get that idea?” He asked. Jo just shrugged, “I didn’t know if you did, was just trying my luck.”

Carter brought over his clothe to compare the writing. It seemed to be the same letters, but slightly different... maybe it was handwriting? Ash looked over at Carter’s finding but they jumped away from him, trying to keep some distance.

“Oh shoot I forgot.” Ash said, flattening the ears on his head. Carter frowned and took a deep breath and inched back toward the bard. “Take this hurry up!” Carter shoves it at him and scurries farther away.

“Ok I guess.” Ash went back to the tapestry, trying to figure out the reoccurring letters.

Jo scooted closer to carter and smiled widely. “So... what happened with cats that caused you to be terrified so much?” She asked sweetly. Carter pauses. “Uhhhh....”

Earlier....

“Ok, everyone stick together. The shop keeper says there’s major stress at the entrance of the cave.” Cj explained as she examined the map that they bought from a gift shop. It was a old mine that housed crystals, but now it’s a tourist attraction.

The whole surrounding town was super old and and had a temple for just about every religion in the land. Even Gjhar feiiled.... Faithy kept her cloak on put away any loose jewelry. The main temple was up north, so as they traveled that way, more and more of them were more common.

But I’ll stop there. The shop keeper said someone covered in dragon scales came through the shop with a large box and went straight into the caves. He seemed like he was running for someone, so whatever was in the box seemed important.

As they ventured in the unconsciously huddled into three separate groups, Faithy and Echo on the left, Carter, Jo, and Ash on the right, and Dax and Cj in the middle.

Definitely unrelated though, Echo was tracing a wall painting with it’s finger and the mountain started shaking. “WHO DECIDED TOUCHING SOMETHING WAS A GOOD IDEA?!?” Ash screamed. “IT WAS CJ” Dax yelled back.

Like it was an action movie or something, rubble came tumbling down and separated the party.

“Ok whatever. Can you use your plants to get us out of here?” Dax asked he traced the walls of the cave.

Cj’s face read “oh duh” but as she went to feel the walls for roots or anything else she frowned. “No good. If I call them I have no idea what it’ll do to integrity of the cave.”

Dax huffed, frail mortals had to be so... frail. Sure the two of them would survive, but his favorite humanoids definitely wouldn’t.

A whistling noise echoed through the tunnel and they taking a fighting stance. Dax signaled her was going further in and Cj followed. They walk around a corner to see a green light emerging from further in.

“You got a few more millennias to live, I’ll go ahead.” Dax said dramaticly. Cj rolls her eyes and crosses her arms. “Like someone would be able to kill, much less defeat a Chaos god.”

Dax slapped a hand on either side of his face and acted surprised.

“To think you’d have so much faith in me!”

Cj just punched his arm, “that would be Faithy, not you.”

“Can I help you two?” A voice from behind them caused them to scream and Dax jumped into the smaller God’s arms.

Even though she was a goddess, she didn’t have supernatural strength of any nature. So her small frame was having trouble keeping him up.

It was a very very very very very very very old person. Now, Cj and Dax had no room to talk, but they had a better skincare routine.

Dax jumped out of Cj’s arms suddenly and her arms flung upwards in a very fast motion, knocking her down in the process. Dax helped her up and they readjust themselves.

“Are you the reason I heard some rumbling?” He asked as he shown his blue lantern around.

A sweat ran down CJ’s back.

“Actually, it was a lizard thing.” Dax spoke up. Cj looked at him with audacity. He had just blamed her for touching the thing she shouldn’t have, causing the mountain to come down on them. So he knew....

The old person simply nodded, “ah well, it’ll take them some time to dig that out. It earns the nearby too much money from tourist to let it stay caved in.” He explained. “Now, why don’t we talk for a bit? I’ll pour some tea.”

They reluctantly follow him into his little cave house. Well it was a small cave room, what’s the term for that? Google isn’t very helpful because all it’s wanting to do is give me tips for a man cave layout.

“So what brings you into an empty crystal cave? You seem more like adventurers than tourist.”

Back to Carter and the cats.

“Oh yeah... cats.” Carter looked away, trying to avoid the question.

Jo sighed and took a step back. “Ok it’s ok, you don’t have to answer that.”

Carter sighed in relief and turned straight around. “But how did you learn to be so swag?”

Carter paused and slowly turned back to them and was about to answer when Ash interrupted.

“OK GUYS! The thing we’re are after is a weapon!” He then broke his instrument and tore off a part of his cape to make a proper torch. Now you might be wondering how they could see without a torch. Ash and Jo could see enough not to bump into anything and Carter could tell where the general area of something is. That piece of clothe was just pure luck.

“Jo can you light this?” He asked her. She nodded and snapped her fingers to start a flame and lit it like a birthday candle.

“How did you do that? I don’t think archers can do that.” Carter said in confusion. She laughed and pointed at her hat. “I can change my class depending on my hat. Not that I have any control of it... if kinda just happens and I can’t ever remember what hat goes with what, we kinda just got lucky.”

Carter blinked slowly. The hat made no sense and there was so no sense of making sense of the thing.

“Guys look!” Ash held up the torch near the tapestry to show the words formed a picture of a weapon. There were also stars scattered around it.

“How do you even know that’s the thing we’re looking for? It could just be something relating to something else?” Jo asked.

“Carter give me the flier.” Ash asked sticking his hand out. Carter scrambled around to remember where he stuffed it, “it’s on your belt of daggers.” Ash said. He grabs it and hands it to the cat boy.

Ash holds it up and looks for any similarity between the flier and the tapestry. “Well thats only convenient.” He said. Jo and Carter look over his shoulder and the weird drawing on the flier almost matches the tapestry.

“It’s missing the words that make up the weapon.” Jo pointed out. Now that was very apparent to Carter and Ash but ummm.... Jo is nice and is explaining what’s going on for you sweet Reader-Chan!

(Aughh that took thirty years off my life. I feel like I’m writing on Wattpad again)

But every single star was present. “Wow I feel smart for figuring this out.” Ash said proudly.

“Do they make a pattern?” Carter asked. Ash shoved the flier at him and started kicking random rocks until one fell apart. He picked it up and grabbed the flier back from carter and plopped down.

He used the fragile rock as chalk and connected each start. “Oooh smart.” Jo added.

There were five large stars and a few smaller stars scattered as well. When Ash connected them all together it looked like a deformed turkey.

“Surely that’s not right.” Ash quickly dusted off the flier and connected only the large stars. “Ok tell me if I’m wrong, but does this look like a straying path?” He pointed out.

It started at one point, split into three, then back to another. “Oh yeah I can see that.” Jo replied.

“Maybe we were going to split up anyway and the rubble just sped it up.” Ash purposed.

“I still don’t see how this has anything to with the Mortem Spera“ Carter replied. Ash thought on his question for a minute but shrugged. “Most of these stupid quest have no reason to link up together the way they do.” The cat boy replied.

“Wait, that means we should be able to meet back up with the others then.” Jo replied. Ash quickly rips the tapestry off the wall and rolls it up. “I don’t know if this will be helpful, but it’s worth a shot.” They then head off the find the others.

“So these star forgers are immortal?” Cj asked before taking another sip of tea. The elder nodded.

“The only thing known to strike down one of these beings is something called the Mortem Spera.” He replied, drinking some of his own tea.

The two gods looked at each other, remembering that was thing they were hired to receive.

“But hear my warning. No mortal has managed to get their hands on it, and if they did they would surely meet their end.” He added.

“So who wielded it?” Dax spoke up. Dax did not have tea, he was drinking black coffee. Not that the old man had coffee, he made it himself— French press and everything.

The old man fell silent and put down his cup. “I don’t know the answer to that question. My theory was a dying god.” Interesting, interesting cool story bro.

“But I don’t actually know that. But I don’t think too much about the subject.”

“Well thank you for your time, but we need to find our friends.” Cj announced and pulled Dax up with her.

“Thank you for humoring me, you young folk have fun.” He said as he was went back to drinking tea.

Cj and Dax scurried out and proceeded further into the cave. “I’m sorry I don’t think he knows what’s he’s talking about.” Dax said.

“How so?” Cj replied. The older god sighed. “As long as I’ve lived, I would have at least heard about a dying god THAT desperate to live. Sure some seek out the fountain of youth, but trying to kill something like a star forger.”

Cj thought on it and nodded, “he did seem like he belonged in a loony bin.”

They then turned another corner to find... Faithy and Echo having a tea party?

She had on a fake crown and Echo had on a fake mustache and top hat. But this wasn’t your average tea party, it was the real thing. With delicate dishes, a tower of Pastries, and Gjhar feiiled forbid... a white lace table clothe.

“Is this what you’ve been doing this whole time?” Cj asked, not that she was one to ask.

“We ran into this lovely dwarf who owns a restaurant in here and we’ve been waiting on the rest of you.” Faithy explained before drinking out of her cup with her pinkie at ninety degrees.

Dax and Cj looked at them confused, “how did you know we were coming this way?” Cj asked.

“Ahh... so the shop owner was telling us that the cave coming down on itself was just a illusion.” Echo replied.

Cj flops down onto the ground and leaves an indention around herself.

“Yeah the whole thing is tourist trap role playing adventure. At the end they trick you into trading a sack of gold for a wooden spear.” Faith added.

“That does explain why it didn’t get any darker when the rocks blocked the entrance.” Dax replied.

Cj shot up from her Cj shaped hole in the floor and started screaming incoherently. She then stop and narrowed her eyes at Dax. “You’re a Chaos god and you couldn’t sense an illusion?”

Dax just shrugged. “I’m a chaos god, everything I do is legit. I have no use for mortal’s artificial magic.” He said with disgust. “That and I wasn’t thinking about it.”

Then. A loud thundering noise echoed through the cave, causing everyone to get up and put up their guard. But here comes ash carrying a stupidly large tapestry and Jo carrying Carter like a baby. How were they making so much noise????

“Ok good, we all found each other and someone isn’t trying to get through rocks like an idiot.” Ash said in relief.

“How did you know about the illusion?” Cj asked. Ash raised his eyebrow, “what illusion? The freaking flier made a map. It’s stupid simple but it works I guess.” He replied.

So... this was so freaking long.

And color coding is a pain

Never again

Ever

I hate everything

Masterlist

Figure out who everyone is, I dare you

[wanderingsoul210]

Ranger Charlie

(This is a story where Charlie meets Mike, a boy who had run away from home and had gotten lost. The 2 wound up even more lost and must work together to avoid dangers, hunters, and to get back to safety. But there seems to be a hidden past behind Mike, and Charlie wants to find out what exactly he’s hiding. If you don’t know, Mike is my Panlie fan kid who “spoiler alert” gets adopted by the Panda and Charlie.)

P.S( Apologies ahead for typos, bad writing, and of course, this weird formatting. I promise I’ll get better, I have to, because the WBB/Panlie fandom is dying fast!)

Chapter 1: The Lost Boy

It was an accident.

That’s all Charlie could think as he walked through the woods in what appeared to be his Ranger uniform. He wore long boots that neared his knees, a tucked in collared shirt along with a sash that contained useful items for being about in the outdoors, and finally a pair of shade sunglasses hung from the base of his collar shirt and a long hat similar to Tabes.

The twigs snapped under his steps as he casually walked through the woods. His eyebrows were burrowed as he was deep in thought, barely even paying attention to his surroundings. The events that had transpired earlier had kept eating away at his mind and he couldn’t help but stay unfocused as he pondered around with these thoughts.

He closed his eyes for a moment and slowly the events replayed themselves in his mind...

-/-

5 hours earlier...

“Right! I’ll let him know right away! Uh-Huh! Yes sir! Goodbye!” Ranger Tabes hung up the phone and looked out into the woods. Her mind filled with worry with what her supervisor just informed her.

She bit her lip and grabbed ahold of her phone before she paused.” This is serious. Do they really think he can handle something like this?” She thought about it for a moment before she shook her head to shake away any doubt.”No! Of course he can do it! If anyone could it would be him...”

She bit her lip as she contemplated her choices.” No one knows the woods like Charlie , so he’ll be perfect, but...this is nothing like our usual rounds. Whoever or whatever is screaming in that part of the woods needs ours help! It could be a deer giving birth, or an injured animal, or worse, a hiker who needs help...!”

Without wasting another second, she grabbed the phone and began to dial someone up...

Meanwhile, the Bears sat on the couch, watching what appeared to be a weird reality show about making urban people survive in rural areas and vice versa.

A guy dressed in overalls and a straw hat watched helplessly as his roomba drove out the front door and began to drive down the street.” My roomba! It’s running away!” He said in a heavy country accent.

Grizz chuckled as the show cut to commercials.” Heh-heh, this show is so crazy! Who comes up with this stuff!?” He said, turning to his bros. Ice Bear shrugs and Panda frowns.” I don’t know, but couldn’t he have just, you know, picked up the roomba an problem solved?” Asked Panda confused.

Grizz just tskd tsk’d and shook his head.

“You just don’t get it,”he says.” Where’s the drama in that? Where’s the action or adventure?” At that moment Charlie stuck his head through the doorframe and turned to the bears.

“Hey y’all, sorry I took so long.” He said as he walked over to the couch.” What’d I miss?”

Panda rolls his eyes and sighs.” Nothing much, just idiots being idiots...” Grizz squints at Panda for a moment before he turns to the tv.” Meh, some guys roomba ran away and now he’s all sad or something...huh, I guess it is kind dumb...” said Grizz.

Panda turns to Charlie and glared at him .

Charlie’s face blushes a bit as he put on a nervous smile.” Uh, what’s up Panda? You look a little...”

“Dude, were you in my room again?”

“Huh?”

Panda sighed and shook his head.” You said you had to ‘drain the main vein’ and that was 15 minutes ago...so what took you so long...”

Charlie was silent for a second before he sputtered.” I...may have clogged the toilet again...and needed...a....really big pillow to unclog it...and stop the water from going to the living room...”

Panda was silent for a moment before he leaned over and peered into the hallway.

His face lit up with anger as he saw the mess in the hallway and the pillow...the pillow!?

“Miki-Chan!”

Panda hopped and pushed pass Charlie as he ran up to the soggy mess and knelt down. His paws shook as he reached down and caressed her face.

Shocks soon converted into anger as he spun around and pointed a finger at Charlie.” Charlie! Why would you do this to my Miki-Chan!?” He cried out causing Charlie to take a step back.

“I-I’m sorry Panda! I thought... I thought she was just a pillow, y’know? I didn’t think...” he sputtered before Panda interrupted him.”Just a pillow!?” Panda let Miki-Chan fall to the ground as he rose to his feet.

“I know she’s not alive, but she’s a better friend than you’ll ever be!” As soon as the words left Panda’s lips, he knew he regretted them. The look of pain on Charlie’s face once he said it. With one final cry he carried Miki Chan off the floor and ran into his room leaving a trail of water behind.

Panda slammed the door and locked it before Charlie ran forward and tried at the the knob.”P-Panda wait! Please! I’m sorry!” Charlie apologizes before pounding on the door.” Please! Let me make it up to you! I-“

“Will you just go away and leave me alone!?” Panda cried out.

And Charlie let his head fall in silence.

He messed up. He knew that. He turned to see Grizz and Ice peeking their heads around the corner. Grizz was the first to step out.

“Hey man, I’m sorry Panda’s acting a little over dramatic with Miki-Chan. He’ll get over it, trust me...” Said Grizz. Charlie just shook his head and looked at the water in the floor.” No, no I should’ve thought about how Panda would feel about this...” Charlie frowned for a moment before sighing.

“Well, I guess I’m gonna head home before I make things worse. Tell Panda that I’m really sorry for all this, and I promise I’ll make it up to him...” Charlie said as he made his way to the front door.

Grizz turned to Ice for a moment before running towards Charlie.” Wait! Charlie, we can fix th-!”

Before Grizz could finish his sentence, a familiar ringtone began to play from the living room. They all paused and turned their heads towards the sound. Grizz walked forward and picked his phone up from the table and looked at who was calling.

“Oh hey, it’s Tabes!” He stated before answering the call.” Hey Tabes!”

“Hey Grizz, Uh, would you by chance happen to know where Charlie would be? It’s kinda urgent...” She stated. Grizz let out a small chuckle.” Sure I do, he’s 3 feet behind me!”

Tabes sat up in her chair at what she just heard. She was relieved that it was much easier to find Charlie than she anticipated. Grizz turned, phone raised up to Charlie’s face, and smirked.” It’s Tabes, she’s asking for you.” Said Grizz.

Charlie looked at the phone and hesitantly grabbed it and raised to his face.

“H-hello?” Charlie stammered, to which he joked when Tabes called his name.

“Charlie! Glad to hear your nearby!” She said, turning on her chair to look at a nearby map.” Listen, I need you to swing by my station as soon as possible.” Charlie burrowed his eyebrows in confusion.” What? Why?” He asked.

“Is it serious? Cause me and Panda just fought and I really want to make it up to hi-“

“There’s no time for that!” She interrupted.” Look, this is serious, probably the most serious mission you’ll get, so please partner, try to get here soon...!” Charlie looked down in silence for a moment before sighing.” Ok, yeah, Tabes, I’m on my way. See you soon...”

Charlie presses the hang up button and turned to Grizz and Ice Bear.

“Well guys, looks like I’ll have to make it up to him another time,” he said followed by a sigh. Grizz frowned.” Thats ok, but is everything ok with Tabes?” He asked.

Charlie shrugged.” I dunno, but she said it was urgent, so I guess I better skidaddle,” and with that he left the cave, stopping at the edge of the clearing to wave goodbye before continuing...

-Present time-

Charlie sat motionless for a while, his eyes closed as he stayed silent. Slowly though, a sound began to ring in his ears which drew him out of his focus. He shook his head before looking around realizing, that this might be what he was looking for.

“Huh, the cries sound like they’re coming from over...there!” He stated as he instantly took off towards the noise. As he ran, the noise began to grow louder with each step. Charlie ran and ran until the sound was in seeing distance. He slowed down to a walk as he approached a clearing. What he saw made his heart drop and his blood freeze.

Charlie stopped dead in his tracks when he noticed a young human boy around the age of 12. He wore cargo shorts that passed his knees as well as a black shirt and a small back pack. He had scraggly black hair and brown eyes. A look of worry was plastered on his face and he appeared to be filled with fatigue as he weekly struggled to pull his leg free from 2 logs that had somehow managed to trap him.

Charlie kept his distance and watched as the kid manage to pull his leg free before he fell over and landed hard on the ground. It was quiet for a moment before the a small cry came from him. The boy turned over and sat up before examining his ankle by raising his pant leg. Even from the distance Charlie kept, he could see that the ankle was swollen and red.

“Oh C’mon!” The kid cried out, tears welling in his eyes as he tried to stand up, but only fell back down upon feeling the intense pain.” Crap...this is it...I messed up...I should’ve never run away from home...dammit...!”

Charlie knew as a Ranger, it was his job to protect any wild life that needs the help, but did this kid count as wild life? He leaned more against the tree and tried to get a better view, but to his dismay, a twig snapped under his boot causing the boy to snap his head in the direction the sound came from.

“Wh-who’s there!?” The boy cried out with a shaky voice only to get silence as Charlie ducked behind the tree, but it was too late.” Hey! I can see you behind that tree! Pl-please! I need help! I’m hurt! Can you help me...!?”

Charlie’s heart raced as he took a breath and stepped out from behind the tree. The boy looked at Charlie before it dawned on him what exactly he was looking at. His eyes widened with fear as Charlie slowly and carefully walked towards him.

“N-no! Stay back!” He cried out as he tried to crawl backwards, his gaze not leaving Charlie’s as he continued on. “Get the hell away from me! Leave me alone! Someone help! Anyone! Save me!!!”

“Hey, it’s ok little guy...!” Charlie Said causing the boy to shake his head in disbelief. “I’m not gonna hurt you! Calm down, please. I’m here to help...!” The kid stopped moving and swallowed nervously as Charlie knelt down in front of him.

He wasn’t sure what exactly he was staring at, but it spoke to him. And...he was wearing Ranger clothes? What the hell was going on? He thought as he tried to calm down.

“Y-you...you spoke...” The boy sputtered causing Charlie to chuckle.” Well yeah! So can you!” Charlie Said. The boy tried to wrap his head on what was going on.

Was he hallucinating? If so, this was one hallucination he couldn’t see past.

“But...you’re a monster...”

Monster?

That was a new one. Charlie had been called many things, Chupacabra, big foot, heck, even a mysterious creature. But monster?

“I know I’m not the friendliest looking Charlie, but I promise, I want to help you,” explained Charlie as he took off his hat.” That’s my job, to help the helpless...”

The boys fear turned into anger as he scoffed.” I’m not helpless...! I’m...just kinda lost...!” He muttered before Charlie pulled out a gauze from his pouch and wrapped it around the boys ankle. He winced as the pain extended up his leg for a moment before he relaxed as the pain subsided. He looked up at Charlie before turning away.

“But...um...thanks anyways...” He said, causing a smile to break on Charlie’s face.” Aww, shucks! Don’t thank me yet! We still gotta get you back safe and sound...!” The boy nodded his head.

“Yeah, but that should be easy right? Since you know the way?” The boy asked as Charlie helped him slowly stand upright. With a grunt, the boy stood steady on his feet, a slight wobble to his stance.

“Sure Do!” Exclaimed Charlie as he took a few steps back to give the kid some space.” Just follow me and I’ll bring you back to the Rangers Station, er, wait, I don’t think I got your name? What was it?”

“Oh,” the boy looked down quietly for a moment before he chipped up.” It’s uh, Mike...” Charlie gleamed with excitement as they began to walk down the path.” Mike Huh? My name’s Charlie! Or you can call me whatever if that makes you comfortable.”

Mike shook his head.” Nah, Charlie’s a good name for you...it really suits you...” he stated with a smirk. This just seemed to make Charlie more excited as they got to know each other more, so he had to ask.

“Thanks...But um...how did you get wat the heck out here Mike?” Charlie asked.

Mike’s walking slowly came to a halt before he looked up nervously at Charlie.

“I...I was on a hiking trip with my parents...and I guess I kinda split up from the group...and gotten lost...”

Charlie burrowed his eyebrows and frowned.” Oh man! Then we better get back to the station quick! Your parents must be worried sick about you...!” It was after a few moments before Charlie realized Mike had stopped walking and was several feet behind him.

“Hey!” He called as he ran back to him.

“What’s wrong pal?” Mike shook his head as he let his bangs cover his eyes.

“I doubt that...” Mike said with a weak smile. He looked up at Charlie before turning on his heel.” There the reason-“ He sped off in the opposite direction before Charlie could react.” Why I’m here...!”

“M-Mike!” Charlie called out before he took off right after him.” Wait!” Even though the pain in his ankle made every fiber in his body shiver and ache, he knew he had to keep going. He wanted to find civilization again, but not if it meant by meeting his parents again.

Mike hopped over a fallen over tree and continued running, ignoring the faint calls of his name in the distance. Without warning, a vine wrapped around his ankle causing him to tumble and slide down a steep slope. Mike desperately grabbed at every branch and shrub on the floor, but to no avail.

He looked back in the direction he was sliding down towards and his eyes got wide. Growing nearer was a literal cliff drop, that appeared to go hundreds of feet down with no chance of surviving.

Mike could only watch in horror as every second that passed, he grew closer to his death. His life flashed before his eyes as they welled up with tears. With one final cry, he shut his eyes and grit his teeth and braced himself for the fall.

As he felt himself fall over the edge, he could only accept his fate. Was this his fault? Probably. All he could think about was how his death would go unnoticed. No one would care that he was gone, not even his parents. He just wished that at least someone was here to comfort him. He was a scared kid after all.

With a breath, he waited for the impact. And waited. And waited. But it never came. In fact, it didn’t even feel like he was falling at all. He slowly peeked open an eye before he opened both of them wide. He realized he was dangling upside down, swaying softly to the wind.

“What the?” He muttered. His leg above him appeared to be caught on something around the ankle. Hesitantly, he looked up and gasped at what he saw.

“Whew! I got you!” Said Charlie, one hand enclosed on his ankle and the other hanging on for dear life to the cliff edge.

“Just hang on! I’ll get you outta this...!”

Mike could only watch as Charlie struggled with what to do.

This is my fault.

Tears welled up in his eyes as they blurred his vision. Just moments ago, he was afraid to lose his life, but now? It’s all he wanted. Because of him, he was going to get this nice...creature killed... With one final breath Mike couldn’t take it anymore. He let out a cry of despair.

“What do you think you’re doing!?” Mike cried out.” Just let me fall! If not, we’re both gonna die...!” Charlie just shook his head and scoffed.” That wont happen! Everything in this forest is mine to protect!” Charlie shouted, gritting his teeth as his grip got weaker.” The trees, the life, everything! I’d give my life up for it all if it meant I could save you...” Mike looked at Charlie hysterically and yelled.”What!?”

Charlie began to sway Mikes body slowly building momentum. He looked down at Mike and grinned.”And I won’t let you down! Not on my waaaaaatch!!!”

And with that, Charlie used all his might to swing Mike high over the ledge and smack dab on the clearing. With a grunt, he pulled himself up and later on his back, panting for air. Mike was also doing the same, his breathing more heavier than Charlie’s.

As he lay there, reality set in his mind and he felt guilty when he realized what he had cause.” Charlie...” he started, trying to hold back any tears as he sat up.

“I’m sorry...! I’m so so sorry...! I almost got us killed...I...can you forgive me!? I didn’t know what to do...! You were gonna take me back to my parents and I-“

Before he could finish, Charlie leaned in and embraced him in a hug.” Hey, hey! It’s ok!” Comforted Charlie while his body trembled slightly from his own near death experience.” I’m sure you had your reasons. It’s not your fault...”

Mike tensed up a bit before he leaned into the hug and finally, the tears began to pour. He just wanted to get away from all this. He just wanted to go home, but he knew that could never happen.

Mike noticed how scared Charlie was, so in an attempt, he pulled away and let out a shaky breath.” We should get going...” Mike muttered getting a confused look

from Charlie.” It’s gonna get dark soon...”

Charlie turned his head and did see the sun nearing towards the ground of the horizon. With a nod of his head and huff, he stood up.” Yeah, you’re right. We better get moving...”

Mike pursed his lips as Charlie pulled out any leaves that got caught in his hat as the two continued to walk. Mike was completely silent the whole time, afraid to do anything that’ll land him in more hot water than he already is.

“All he was trying to do was help me,” he thought as he stole a glance at Charlie. “If only I could tell him...but...how would he react...?” Suddenly Mike crashes into Charlie before taking a step back.” Huh? What happened? What’s going on?” He asked.

Instead of getting a response, Charlie hopped onto the nearest tree. Mike watched in awe as Charlie easily scaled the trees as if it was nothing. Clearly, he had been doing this for years because he made it look like child’s play .

In a matter of seconds, Charlie reached the peak of the tree and looked around the whole area. That’s when a worried look formed on his face. He was up there for some time, but after another a moment, he slid all the way down the side of the tree before landing with a thud.

“This isn’t good...” Charlie muttered taking off his hat and scratching the back of his head. Mike stood there and watched as Charlie paced back and force, deep in thought. It was obvious something was worrying the cryptic so Mike had to figure out what was bothering him.

“Charlie...” Mike started catching the squatch’s attention.” What’s wrong? Did I do something wrong...?” Charlie burrowed his brow for a moment before sighing.” To be honest kid, none of this looks familiar...” Charlie muttered causing Mikes face to fall.” I don’t think I’ve been to this part of the forest yet... everything is new to me and...I have no idea where we are...!”

Mike swallowed nervously as he fell back and sat down on the ground.” You mean, we’re gonna have to try and survive out here? With no equipment or food or anything!?” He asked, a feeling of despair washing over the two. Charlie nodded.

Mike looked down and let out a small laugh.” Man, could this day get any better?” As if on que, thunder roared across the woods causing several birds to fly out into the sky. Mike could only shake his head before turning to Charlie.

“So what now Mr. Expert?” Asked Mike.

“Got any bright ideas?”

Charlie nodded his head.” Yeah,” he said helping Mike back up on his feet.” First things first, we gotta find some shelter before nightfall, or before it rains, because the woods become extremely dangerous with one of those around...”

Mike sighed before nodding his head. And with that, the two began to walk deeper into the woods, with the storm and nightfall closing in in them...

(End of Chapter 1)

Ok I’ve been meaning to post this for a while now, but it’s something for the whole We Bare Bears Hiatus. Sorry for spelling errors and typos. It’s my first story in a while and I’m working on this to be made into a illustrated comic. Anyways, part 2 is already almost done, so stay tuned! And feedback is greatly appreciated!

[maryannalush]

Rant on Voltron season 8

I dont know how long this will be and im sorry if i ramble.

Okay so i just finish watching Voltron and let me tell you i am not amused. And it is more than just the last episode. I mean that was pretty weak in my opinion. I know some people liked it. Power to them. But not me. I felt like my intelligence had been insulted.

First i will start with Allura. I knew when I first started watching Voltron that she was going to die. And at first i was like "yea okay, last altean, i see where they are going with this". I didnt really like her character at first. She seem to happy, and just to much. But as the seasons when on i felt like she gained something. She wasn't just this hollow, one dimension, self sacrificing character. But at the same time i felt like she was constantly trying to die to save people and that's good and all but it was way overused (not just with her but all the paladins) and i just felt it was really stupid. Like you are the only people who can save the universe (and all realitys) and yet you are willing to throw away your life at the drop of a hat. 💁‍♀️ bitch what. And then with her romance with Lotor. That just rubbed me the wrong way. I get it. She thought he was the last one of her kind. I just felt forced. Like really forced. It felt to me like a plot point and nothing more.

Then we have Lance. Some things with his character were really good. Like he was a ladies man but not in the creepy way that a lot of them are played out to be. He was kind and never tried to really force his was with Allura and i loved that. He respected her and didn't treat her like some object that he could have if he tried hard enough. Everyone knew he liked her but he wasn't constantly showing her with affection and offers and gifts like i have seen over and over again in TV shows. It was really refreshing. But outside of that there wasn't much to his character. He could shoot well, yea. But that's not really a character trait. Just a skill. I think they could have done so much with his character if they tried. But he was literally like a side character the entire time. Nothing about his character really shown through the whole show. He was just sure of himself and sometimes but the team in danger. Plus he was super annoying at times. Don't get me wrong i think hes a good character but just way under done.

Next us Keith's character. I think he went though the most changes thought Voltron. With a few occational backtracks. He started out as this out cast kid who didn't like authority and wanted to be alone (the emo kid) into someone whole led the fight against the Galra. (More about becomig leader later). And i loved his character growth, but we didnt really get to see it happen. One minute he was with his mom outside of the Colony the next he's back with Voltron and hes ready to be a leader. Before he left he was still this kid who was running away from responsiblitly, running g away from being the Black Paladin and then he gets back to the ship and boom hes a leader. I understand he aged and matured and probably learned a thing or two from his mother but we never really see that. Shiro was alway "ill never give up on you" but it didnt make him the leader. Another thing that frustrated me was when Shiro left for space Keith got himself kicked out of the Garrison. Its kinda like all the stiff Shiro did to get him in and keep him in was for nothing. Especially after they thought he died. All those flash back and the time he spent with him added up to nothing. Sure it was used later to show the bond between them and help them a time or two, and that great, but i feel like that could have been achieved though the other things they went through. I also find it weird that no one ever knew that he wasn't fully human, i feel like something would have shown before he activated the Blade. All other half breeds showed outwardly that they were part Galra but he didnt. He looked totally human until then. Once again i think it was a plot point. Especially when Allura was avoiding him because he was part Galra was super stupid, or at least i thought. Mainly because i feel like really had no reason to dislike him, like he never did anything and she was like "thats because your Galra". He wasn't mean or anything. Loner, yes. I dont know it just kinda made me made.

Pidge is next. I feel like Pidges main thing was learning to accept herself and find her brother. I like how they did it and that she didnt start dressing girly once they found out. She was who she wanted to be. And being male or female didnt change that. Even when she got back to earth. I also low key forgot they were looking for her brother and farther like half way through because they never really made way on it until she saw the picture of her brother. I mean yes they hinted at it. But it seemed like she put it on a back burner, then all of a sudden it was all she cared about. And that just doesn't seem very Pidge to me. And even thought she is a girl they didnt make her less of a character than the rest like Allura was for a while. She was always super important and stayed that way.

I dont really have much to say about Hunk. I loved him and he was a good supporting character to the main people but that's just about all her was.

Okay now one of the things i really didnt like about the whole thing. The switching lion. Why, why..... why. To me it felt silly and unessisary. At the time Keith was no where near being ready to pilot the black lion and Allura had been a dull character. Lance was perfect for Blue and Keith for Red. But when they switched it made me feel like they were being forced into role that really didnt belong. I feel like Allura should have piloted the black lion in Shiros absences but given it back when Shiro returned. She had shown.she was a leader and respected by everyone and it was almost a slap in the face to see her in the blue lion. And Lance in the red lion felt wrong too. Shiro should have stayed Black paladin and in his absence Allura. Like a mom and dad duo. (Not ship wise tho) They gave off the vibes of both being the leaders, Shiro being the to and Alloura his second i command. As i srated ealier Keith did eventually step up as a leader but i feel like as the red lion he could have been a leader like Shiros right hand man. I feel like the shift was unessisary and cause more problems then it solved. And then they didnt change out fits either so you have the red paladin wearing a blue outfit and the black paladin wearing a red outfit. It irked me to no end seeing that. Like you change lion you change suit. Boi 😤🙏

And then the last season. Oof. I feel like it was pulling in so many different directions. It was so much confusing, more like info overload. They could have either made another season or took some pointless thing out. Like they kept having to prove their bond with each other every other episode. It got boring. I under stand it happening once or twice but how often i heard Keith saying we have to work together it the power is within was over kill. They already established they were super strong together. I understand they wanting the audience to know that were strong but really. Almost every episode. Come on. Give me a break. It almsot it like their bond before wasn't really a bond so they had to do it again. But whatever.

Now Alluras death. Let me tell you that made me mad. Like wtf. The was they did it was alomst lien they pulled ut out of their ass. "Hey how should we end this" "i dont know... it had to be something epic" "how about all the paladin combine their strength with all the last paladins and Hagger and fix the universe and channel it thought Allura ( how i thought it should have gone. Because we literally see the past paladins before she goes but idk) " naw lets just kill Allura and make it as unrealistic and simple as possible". I feel like they could have done so much more, something so much more meaningful. It just felt so rushed and almost pointless. Like they didnt know what to do and took out the most useless paladin and called it a day. It just wa ssooo freaking stupid and dull. And then when They were saying goodbye they were all okay with it. Didn't question it. Didn't try to come up with a different solution like they have done ever time in the past that someone tried to sacrifice theirselves. Nope just was like if you say so. Boop. Big freaking ooof. Like ever other time someone tried to sacrafice themselves they found a was to do something else but there they where kind ooc a bit. And lance. Man. I feel like he was under reacted. That was the love of his life. The girl he would never get over a d he barely argued. Like no. No. Just no. All his character development, poof gone. All im saying is they wouldn't have just accepted it. Of all the things they went through i just dont think they would.

Lastly the after credit(?) Thing. There was so much wrong with that. Like lance. I feel like he would have not moved on per say but found someone else to love. Because Allura wouldn't have wanted him to grow up and be alone for the rest of his life. It was sad and kinda pathetic. She would have wanted him to find a nice girl and have little baby lances. Instead he was forever heart broken and unable to move on. Blah. And Chip i wanted more about chip. Why did she build him. Was he supposed to be a son like figure because he looked like a child. Did he even work. I have so many questions. And then Shiro marring some random bimbo. They had no build up, nothing. He just in a few shots aboard the Atlas. It felt like a last minute decision. They could have done so much with them becoming a thing. But nope they show Shiro may or may not have been with Adam and then decided just to give him a random gay marriage. They aaidsomething about him finding happiness but never once did it seem like that was what he was looking for throughout the show. Not like Lance was. He never even seemed interested in anyone thought out the whole thing. Like maybe he traveled the first earth mission thought space or something idk. It made his character feel sallow.

End of rant. If you disagree with me or think i jave something wrong feel free to discuss it with me. Like and adult.

Thanks for your time.

[taxesdeathtrouble]

so! about that hogwarts au

im gonna get housing/birth status (??? whats the word for that) done right off the bat

alex is a slytherin, as stated in my previous post (i’m gonna put it in the same tag: hogwarts au)

Molly is a Gryffindor, through and through. the second it was placed on her head the hat was yelling

Chase is a Hufflepuff, which i know is controversal but it boils down to boy needs a hug and people who care about him and he gets that in Hufflepuff

Nico is also a Hufflepuff and I’m right. her sisters one too but thats not my main reasoning my main reasoning is that she’s really loyal and a fucking awesome friend and she’ll go to great lengths to protect the people she loves. 

Karolina is a Gryffindor, but she was also a hatstall because she really really wanted Hufflepuff because her mother drilled it into her that it’s the only truly good house but the hat sees her potential and puts her in with the lions and she ends up ruling them all through her kindness and how willing people are to follow her

Gert is a Ravenclaw, she was a hatstall too but she really didn’t want to be Slytherin (’not that there’s anything wrong with Slytherin it’s a great house’ but it’s just not what I want’)

So Chase and Karolina are purebloods (well, chase is. karolina’s dad is secretly a mythical being but she doesn’t even know he exists so thats for another time) nico is a halfblood (me mum’s a witch. dad’s a muggle. bit of a nasty shock for him when he found out) gert is a pureblood that doesn’t know she’s a pureblood because her mother died when she was three-four and she barely remembers her- she has dreams sometimes where she’s flying on a broomstick with a dark haired woman who’s face she can’t see. the moon is bright, and they are both laughing in joy. she got adopted by the Yorkes, a well meaning muggle scientist couple who make fast friends with their new neighbors, the Hernandezes, a pair of wizards with a child of their own. when Gert is seven and starts making the flowers in the backyard grow like crazy and begins to float down the stairs every morning, Gene and Alice spill the beans that she’s probably a witch and explain about the wizarding world. they give them Neville Longbottom’s card because they’re personal friends (he and gene go to the same bookstore a lot and are kind of buddies) and he explains about the wizarding world and hogwarts and gives gert a bunch of books about their history which leads to an obsession with Hermione. Neville checks in a few times and Gert chatters nonstop and Neville is like ‘i know her, actually’ and Gert screams. anyways Molly gets adopted by the Yorkes when her parents are killed by a mysterious accident and she’s not a pureblood because her family was never obsessed with that purity bullshit but it does make her family tree kind of...........spotty, and other relatives hard to find.

now, on to the good stuff aka Plot

- the five of them meet near the beginning of first year

- gert and chase are friends first because they meet on the train

- by the way this is going to be gertchase heavy dont @ me

- so anyways they meet on the train, and gert sees this very pretty boy sitting alone in a compartment as she walks the length of the train looking for a place to sit for the trip

- and he looks really sad. this is because ten minutes before boarding the train his father had just finished a long, self righteous lecture on why he should ask the hat to be in Gryffindor because ‘that’s what house i was in and you should be like me’ which is the last thing Chase wants.

- ‘hey, mullet, mind if i sit?’ gert asks, flouncing in and plopping down without waiting for an answer, and chase, who’s never been called a mean name by a peer in his life, and certainly never by someone this pretty, is flabbergasted.

- ‘excuse me? i do not have a mullet’ by the way chase is british gert is irish the others i dont care as much but these are the ones i’m attached to because i’m writing something else where that’s their nationalities

- ‘uh, yeah you do, mate. the name’s gert.’ she sticks out her hand, and it’s covered in scribbles. chase takes it hesitantly, and says, ‘uh. my name is chase stein.’

- gert spends that entire first year trying to get him to stop acting like he’s a grandmother at tea time and talk like a normal kid because he’s literally never hung out with anyone his age before

- the way the rest of them became friends: gert decimates alex at gobstones, alex is friends with nico, nico is friends with chase because #puffsolidarity and karolina is friends with gert from like, day two of their first year when they both got detention (the story of which they will Never Tell) (they conspired together to let the frogs from the transfiguration course escape) (they got two weeks detention)

- when chase gets sorted into hufflepuff, he cries. years later, he still doesn’t know why.

- chase develops a big crush on gert in their third year, which is also around the time she decides she’s going to be an animagus (alex told her she couldn’t do it and she got so pissed at him they didn’t talk for a month but it did start her on that path so she’s not super mad anymore) 

- so for about a month she’s being secretive as hell and won’t talk, which she comes up with a variety of reasons for, ranging from ‘i’ve taken a break from talking so you all remember how funny i am’ to ‘i have a debilitating non life threatening illness so i can’t talk until the month is over even if i wanted to’

- chase totally calls bullshit, and he’s kind of upset with her because he JUST figured out he’s likes her and now she won’t even talk?

- when she finally becomes an animagus she doesn’t tell anyone because it’s technically illegal but the first thing she says to anyone is ‘hey, mullet, pass the eggs,’ to chase (because he’s thirteen and still has the mullet although she’s probably going to be calling him that even when they’re married) and he cries. she’s like ‘woah what’s wrong?!?’ and he says through tears ‘you’re (sob sob) talking to me (sob sob) again (sob sob)’ but he gets a hug out of it so the ribbing from the guys on the quidditch team is worth it

- speaking of quidditch

- oh wait right gert’s animagi form is a kitty cat which she’s pissed about because she wanted something badass but nope she’s a fluffy calico with glasses markings around the eyes (and a purple tuft when she dies her hair)

- anyways quidditch

- gert and chase are both on their respective teams, gert is a beater and chase is a chaser (haha) and later on they become captains

- nico is the announcer for the games and a common theme is her dramatically making fun of their sexual tension/basically being a couple without being a couple bullshit

- ‘oh and there goes yorkes hitting stein with the bludger again, now, we have to wonder how bad their little lovers quarrel was’ 

- in fourth year, there’s the tournament and the yule ball

- karolina gets picked to represent hogwarts, and she doesn’t win but she still ‘loved the experience!’

- she takes nico to the ball, and that’s how they get together it’s really cute

- so obviously chase was planning to ask gert to the ball

- but he gets nervous and waits too long, and he’s literally mid sentence about to ask her when this girl from Beauxbatons (abby, if you’ve read one of my previous fics) waltzes up all cool and asks Gert straight up ‘will you go to the ball with me?’

- gert looks at chase first, just for a second, then says, ‘of course!’ because she really didn’t think anyone would ask her and abby is really really pretty and nice

- so gert looks gorgeous the night of 

- she’s wearing this long, shimmery dress, and her long, dark hair is in ringlets, and chase is enamoured

- she asks his opinion first, because best friends and all

- gert: so what do you think?

chase, completely heartbroken that he’s not taking her to this dance but trying to be cool: you look nice :) 

- gert thinks hes being insincere tho and it kind of hurts her feelings

- the dance is fine until gert goes to get her and abby drinks and abby is making out with someone random and gerts heart breaks in two

- she runs out of the ballroom in tears, and chase, who’s been sitting at a table all night completely ignoring his date, to her annoyance, sees her leave. he immediately gets up and goes after her, and finds her crying her eyes out in an empty classroom

- ‘hey’ he says, sitting down next to her. ‘hi,’ she says, voice cracking, and he wraps his arms around her and she presses her face into his chest as she cries.

- and then she starts rambling. ‘so i just saw abby kissing on some other girl, and i mean, i knew this was too good to be true, but i didn’t want to believe it, you know? i was just happy someone wanted to take me, but i should’ve known when she kept calling me beautiful. liars don’t make good dates.’

- ‘what? gert, you’re, um, you’re beautiful’

- ‘pfft yeah right i know you think so, sure-’

- chase holds her face in his hands in a rare moment of fourteen year old boldness and says ‘gert. you’re gorgeous’

- ‘o-oh’

- he seems to realize what he’s doing and pulls away, and they don’t talk about it after, but gert gets the beginning of a crush that day.

- so fifth year

- gert and chase don’t see each other all summer, because gert’s parents drag her and molly to america for research, which is where gert meets tandy and ty, super cool american wizards and she posts a picture with one of them on insta and Chase gets mega jealous even if he doesn’t say anything

- gert cuts and dyes her hair with tandy and molly’s help but keeps it a secret so she can surprise him

- they text more than call because chase’s voice is in the midst of dropping and he’s embarassed

- and the whole summer he’s bored as hell so he just goes to the gym every day

- and he finally gets a good hairstyle

- so that first day at the train station gert sees him and literally doesn’t recognize him

- who is this broad-shouldered, deep-voiced beauty standing beside her? and staring at her like he can’t believe what he’s seeing?

- ‘gert?’ ‘oh my god, chase? you look............so different. so what do you think? of my hair, i mean.’ her brain’s a little wonky. chase is so attractive, what the fuck

- he reaches over and winds his finger around a curl. ‘it’s really pretty.’ his voice is soft and to her ears, intimate, and oh, fuck you, hormones, this is the last type of reaction she wants to be having to this.

- she blushes really red and chase is like hmmm this is new

- that whole year there’s something different underlying everything. they spend a lot more time alone, doing homework together or going out on their broomsticks or splitting off from the group when they go to hogsmeade

- coincidentally, they both also make prefect that year, and through a lot of twisting schedules around by the kids (nico and karolina make prefect and there’s a few other interhouse relationships so gert and chase get paired up) they do patrols together

- and there’s a metric fuckton of flirting

- they also start playing dumb magic pranks on each other around this time, so often one of them will show up to breakfast with green hair or galaxy freckles

- chase did the freckles to piss her off but, oh no, she looks so cute, this isn’t fair

- fifth year is also when gert’s anxiety starts to get bad, so there are a lot of nights where she roams the castle in cat form, still kind of pissed about the tuft of purple that sticks up

- on one of these nights, chase can’t sleep. and i mean really can’t sleep. so he puts on the little device he wired up to make teachers not notice him because im lazy and cant think of anything else and heads down to him favourite alcove where he can look up at the moon and the snow falling and just think.

- gert comes across him, still in cat form, and she still hasn’t told him, or anyone, that she’s an animagus, so she considers just walking away, but then chase sees her and is picking her up and babytalking at her and oh, this is so cute, she can’t leave now

- so she settles in his lap and he starts petting her, saying, ‘you’re so soft, yes you are, pretty girl, yes you are,’ because ya know. he thinks hes talking to a cat.

- and then he just starts rambling about his issues and hes kind of maybe vaguely talking about ‘this girl’ (gert) and he doesnt say that he likes her but if you listen closely its clear, and okay, gert needs to transform back now or she’ll fall asleep, and she’s been meaning to tell chase anyways.

- so she changes back and oh, she didn’t think this through, because she’s sitting in his lap in her- oh, shit- pyjama shorts and tank top and no bra, what the fuck was she thinking?

- chase screams, and gert slaps her hand over his mouth so they don’t get caught. ‘are you done?’

- chase is wide eyed as he nods, and gert takes her hand off his mouth.

- ‘so. you’re an animagus, right?’ ‘yeah’ ‘how long?’ ‘remember that time in third year when alex said i wouldn’t be able to do it and we fought?’ ‘oh my god’

- his arm settles around her waist, fingers brushing against bare skin where her shirt has ridden up, and they’re both staring at each other and thinking ‘what if we made out right now’

- but then they hear a loud banging noise and jump to their feet, running back down the hallway. gert turns into a cat midstep, and chase whisper-shouts ‘that is SO not fair!’

- they make it back to their respective common rooms, just barely, and neither of them are able to sleep the entire night because of what almost happened between them

- at the end of the year, at the train station, they share a very long hug and promise to see each other over the summer. their friends are definitely making fun of them in the background

- near the start of sixth year they’re still doing patrols together, and one night, out of the blue, chase kisses her. they end up making out for like, an hour, then go back to their dorms smiling their asses off

- but guess what? they’re idiots. so they don’t get together right then

- they don’t actually talk about it. but every night they’re on patrol together, guess who’s ignoring their duties to make out in some dark corner? them

- but during the day they’re kind of ignoring each other and everyone is so sick of it so one day nico shoves them into the room of requirement (which she definitely found really early on in her hogwarts career- hufflepuffs are particularly good finders, after all) to force them to talk to each other and locking the door.

- they kind of just stand their awkwardly for a minute until gert is like ‘wanna make out’ and chase, being chase, says yes

- so they do that for a while, and there’s a couch in this nondescript room because story reasons, so it gets a little pg-13 up in the room of requirement if you know what i’m saying

-but chase gets hit with this wave of i wish she was my girlfriend why isn’t she my girlfriend what are we doing and stops kissing her. he’s so tempted to just dive back in, just from how she’s looking right now, but he really, really needs to say something.

- ‘look, gert, i want you to know.........i have feelings for you. there, i said it. and i’m not comfortable with just messing around when i care about you so much- mph!” 

- Gert cuts him off with a kiss. she pulls back, and says, ‘I like you too, mullet.’ and then they make out some more and when they come out of the room of requirement their entire friend group is waiting outside the door with Bertie Botts and chocolate frogs waiting to see the results and they come out holding hands and everyone starts cheering dramatically, like, ‘FINALLY, AFTER SIX YEARS, I KNOW PEACE!’

- and they all live happily ever after the end

[bloody-hands-pure-hearts1329]

How Ace gets her fire power and meets the Turtles. (Part 2)

Almost twenty minutes later...

Donnie looked nervously over the beauty laying clothed in nothing except a sweat shirt of Mikey.

He tried to take some blood from her but her arm turned to fire and made a hole on the place where he tried to touch her with the injection.

"Interesting her body is protecting her even thought she is unconcious!" he realized. So he scanned her body instead and looked in to his hollogram. "This is amazing she is like...made of fire now, her whole organs the same but at the same time they can turn in to fire whenever she gets in trouble. Its like she is made of fire. SHE is living fire!" he shouted and looked in shock at her as she started to burn he grabbed the extinguisher to put it quick out.

"I ask myself..." the purple masked turtle to himself and tried to take blood from her again this time he succeed and took her blood to test it.

"So water and cold stops her fire power interesting to...."

"Hey Donnie is my girlfriend finally awake I made some pizza for us!" Mikey broke in to the lab.

"MIKEY!" Donnie screamed in shock at his younger brother as he almost let one of his tools fall.

The orange masked turtle ignored him and walked over to the young woman. He leaned over her to carefully wipe her wet black lock out of her face.

"Why is she so wet?" he asked his brother blushing as his eyes fell on his sweater glued to the body of the new girl.

Donnie quick put white lab coat over her to stop Michelangelos eyes from falling out.

"Hey Donnie are finally finished with your tests?" the big brute of the family walked in to the lab this made the genuis turtle let out a deep sigh.

It was almost impossible to work on something with his curious brothers making him almost go crazy by walking in to his lab. That was the main reason why he kept his lab locked but because he was been so excited to find out more about this woman, he forgot to follow his important rule to lock his lab before starting his work.

"Mhm..." all three looked at the woman letting out a moan as she came to herself slowly sitting up on operation table she was laying on.

"What happend?" Ace asked them confused for a few seconds before she stare in shock at the talking humanoid turtles standing before her. "Who are you?" she asked staring at them in awe. Turtles! Talking Human like turtles! She always adored this animals.

"Miss please dont be scared we safed you from..."

"The bad guys I did the most of course I am Michelangelo but you can call me your future boyfriend" the youngest sibling interupted his older brother winking at Ace.

This made her giggle and looks over at the growling red masked turtle.

"Raphael and you call me Raph why dont ya screaming freaks or something?" he asked her.

"BECAUSE YOU ARE AMAZING!" she screamed making all three look at her in shock.

"I want to know all about you, are you born this way? Are you a new kind? Are you some kinda experiment? Are you...." suddenly the young woman fell back and shocked all even more but make them sweat drop as she snored loudly laying asleep before them.

"She is sleeping so beautiful!" Mikey cheered looking at her as she scratched her head.

"Yeah like fucking sleeping beauty on drugs" groaned his golden eyed brother shaking his head at her.

"She is really sleeping this is surprising maybe we...Wahhh!"

All three screamed like little girls as the young beauty sat suddenly up looking at them with half closed eyes dizzy from her short sleep.

"Where was I?" she asked the three mutants confused and yawed.

"Y-You wanted to know what exactly we are Miss...are you okay? I think you should take some more Rest" Donnie first found his voice after a while just staring at her.

"Oh this is nothing to worry about really I only have this narco-thing so this will happen from time to time" Ace waved it off like nothing.

"What is the Nacro-thing?" asked Mikey looking at Donnie who thought for a few seconds before he looked in surprise and shock at her.

"Its a long-term neurological disorder that involves a decreased ability to regulate sleep-wake cycles. Symptoms include periods of excessive daytime sleepiness that usually last from seconds to minutes and may occur at any time." the purple masked genius explained to his brothers.

"Okay....I still dont get it" Mikey said smiling making Donatello slap himself.

"One more try then she has a sleep disorder, she can not controll this moments when she falls asleep her body shuts down for a few seconds or longer time. It can happen any time" Donnie tried to explain it to him again.

"I fall asleep sometimes nothing to worry about really" said and stand slowly up looking curious around in the big lab. "You have a nice place here did you build this all by yourself smartass in purple?" she asked Donnie while winking at him.

This made him blush and only nod at her not trusting in his voice. This woman was something else for sure.

"Ya he did so who the fuck ya are and how ya get in to this mess?" asked Raph her annoyed over his brothers being all over her. Yeah she was hot and all but she was also some kinda weird and this confused him.

"I am Alisa, Calina, Ekaterina but all call me Ace. I tried to help a man from getting kidnapped and was knocked out in process. All I know is waking up from pain, becaus if this weird ooze they pumped in to my body" she explained him rubbing her head missing her hat.

"Ace mhm have family up there?" the big brute asked her while looking down at her arms crossed over his plastron.

"SHE IS BURNING!" Mikey screamed as Ace pulled her hand from her head to look at it on fire.

"I AM BURNING! WHY I AM BRUNING" she screamed and starts running around until Mikey throw two of his famous water ballons at her. She stopped and calmed down looking at Donnie for explantation.

He carefully took her hand and pulled her over to his chair to make her sit down while telling her all her found out about her mutation.

Ace listened to the turtle genius in silence. It all sounded amazing and scary at the same time to her. She was a mutant now a fire mutant to be exact and the scary part on it was she couldnt controll it.

"I understand but how can I controll this new power? I cant turn to a walking tortch before my family and friends" she told Donnie who nodded.

"I will try my best to help you in this" he promised her even thought he didnt know how he could help her but as the so called fixer of this family, he always found a way to fix any situation.

Ace gave him a wide smile. "Thank you"

"I wanna help her too!" Mikey yelled and get closer showing her his water filled ballons. "I will put the fire out when ever you start burning!" he promised her as well.

Only Raphael stayed silent shaking his head at both looking over at the leader as he walked in to the room.

Donnie quick filled the blue masked turtle in by what he find out about Ace.

"Miss Ace you can stay here until you in full controll over your power about your family you can let them now that you needed to leave the city for a while" he offered her. The dark haired beauty nodded silently before she took out her phone to write a message down for her boss and another one for her family the old house keeper and the kids of the orphanage she grown up at once.

"Thank you for the offer I could use something to eat now" she explained to the four brothers.

She laughed as Mikey suddenly pulled her up in his arms cheering. "Thats perfect I made some pizza for us babycakes" He run out of the lab before anyone could say something against it.

Raph looked at the other. "Ya really want her to stay here fearless? What if she burns down the lair?"

"Yes I want her here and we will keep an eye on Ace so nothing will happen to the lair" his oldest brother explained to him.

"I can try to make her back human" Donnie offered starting to talk to fast explaining that with help of her blood he could try to make the antidode to the ooze who changed her.

Leonardo trying to follow his middle brother rumblings managed to catch the most important and nodded. "I trust you Donnie to make this antidode but as long she has the this power she needs to learn to controll it to not become any danger to us" the leader told them his decision.

Mikey and Ace arrived in the kitchen and Mikey put the young woman carefully down on a chair before he quick putt the food on two plates sitting down beside her to eat with her.

"Its really delicious" she told him after she took a bite of one slice.

"Yeah it is the best food ever! So do you have a boyfriend?" the cheerful turtle asked her directly.

Making Ace blush slighty looking down to hide it. "No....not right now" she tried to stay calm but she didnt liked to talk about her non existend love life.

Mikey wanted to ask more but was interupted by April and Casey coming in to the room.

"You are awake? Good I have some questions..."

"Jones" April stopped her boyfriend from letting his officer self out on the young woman.

"I know you, you are the news reporter April O´Neil of chanel 6?" Ace said smiling to her.

"Yes I am looks like I am a bit famous" she chuckles and looks smiling at the younger woman. "But please just call me April and this is Casey we are friends of the turtles who saved your from the Shredder" April told her smiling and sat down across from her.

"I am Alina, Calina, Ekaterina or short Ace really a pleasure to meet" the brown eyed girl told them with a slight bow of her head.

"Okay Ace can you tell us how you end up in this mess?" wanted Casey to know while sitting down beside April across from her.

Ace told them what happend and gave all three almost a heart attack as her head fell down face first in the pizza.

The youngest turtle quick pulled her back up while April cleaned her face and Casey put pillow on the place of the food to lay her back down on it letting her sit there snoring.

To be continued...

[v3-killing-harmony-imagines]

Valentines day with the v3 cast!

lets just ignore the fact that its march whoops 

Also this took be 3 hours to type ugh

Saihara: 

he buys you flowers, chocolates and a stuffed bear 

he spend the entire day with you, doing everything you ask

he’s very flustered the whole day, complimenting you every chance he can get 

No!hat!

he takes you out to a restaurant for dinner 

he insists that you get anything you want, he’ll pay for it all!

he gives you a very fancy necklace at the end of the night 

cute bushy kisses afterwards

you decide how long it lasts ^

Kaede

she’s pretty new to this, so she does the basics, chocolates and flowers 

She invites you to stay the night!

so you two are in your pj’s when she offers to get you something to drink

about a minute late you hear the sound of a cup smashing

you rush down and she’s standing beside a broken mug, the contents spilled over the floor

she starts apologizing, she lost her balance and then her hand slipped and then-

you calm her down and help her clean up, insisting that its fine! It happens!

she plays the piano afterwards, to calm you two down

She shyly kisses you before you two go to sleep

she’s curled against you when you wake up

Kaito:

He takes you to one of those science center things that has stuff about 

he’s so excited to show you everything !

you better have lots of energy, he’s not leaving for at least 3 hours

he buys you a necklace as well

you two take the bus home, your head on his shoulder 

its so warm, and he gives you his jacket for protection

afterwards you two go home and end up ordering take-out 

he buys you a heart necklace

it has glitter in it, making it look like your looking into the milky-way.

You two crash when you get home, exhausted 

he curls you in his arms,planting a kiss on your head

Happy valentines. 

Maki:

She isn’t quite sure what to do today

she lets you decide, shes happy as long as your happy

you eventually decide for a walk by the lake, and dinner 

She gives you a bouquet of flowers; they’re roses

She flushes when you ask her to hold hands 

you two cook dinner together

the entire experience is very normal, but it’s lovely all the same 

She reminds you that she loves you at the end of the day, placing a kiss on your lips

Korekiyo:

He tells you to close your eyes

he drives you to a building

when you open your eyes again, he’s dressed up and your in a candle-lit room. 

he shows you to your seat, across from him.

and then the food starts to come 

course upon course of fine dishes, and they don’t stop coming 

after you two have eaten, he takes your hand and you two dance.

he tells you how radiant you look

your swinging in his arms, as the last note plays out he finally gets down to the main course

getting on his knee

“S/o, You are the most divine creature I have set eyes on, will you make allow me the honor to marry you?”

Iruma:

.......

WeLL

you wont get this unless SOMEONE ASKS

VERY KINKY 

ROPES AND TOYS INCLUDED 

on the other hand, she’d give you a nice choker as a gift 

Gonta: 

wants to make you very happy today

so you come home...

“Ah! S/o! close your eyes!”

He leads you upstairs and tells you to open your eyes

surprise! 

there’s a blanket spread out on the floor, lots of pillows, a wrapped present and.... is that a scrapbook?

yes, yes it is 

you two make a scrapbook about you two, gotna’s prepared refreshments and offers a movie if you get bored!

its very fun!

he makes you open the gift, its a small pin of a butterfly.

you thank him with a gentle kiss

Himoko: 

She puts weeks into her plan

finally the day comes 

the sits you down, making sure your very comfy

and then the show begins 

BAM 

streamers fly and glitter flies through the air as banners fall into place 

and the show begins 

she’s moving everywhere, pulling a dove from her hat and then turning it into a flower and then the flower is flying in the air..

so much is happening, and its breathtaking 

at the very end, she walks over to you and takes out a box

she wishes you a happy valentines day, before collapsing, exhausted 

after she rests, she asks if you liked it

you kiss her on the forehead

“ It was splendid.”

Hoshi:

if you want to, he’d let you decide what to do

drive-in movie? drive-in movie 

he gets you popcorn and soda and you two relax

romance movies are too cheesy

so you two are watching some horror film

you’ve got your shirt pulled up past your nose when the jump scare happens 

you just weren't expecting him to scream that high

in actuality, its a normal scream, but for his vocal cords its high 

you two make eye contact for one second 

and then you cant hold in your laughter, popcorn is going everywhere but that doesn’t matter.

you have to cheer him up afterwards 

you don’t ever let him fully live it down

Angie: 

shes so excited! 

she paints you a special picture to show her love 

she’ll even make a statue of you if she gets the chance!

lots and lots of kisses today 

she’d be so happy if you two made dinner together

there’s avocados 

she almost goes through he roof when you get her something 

shes!just!so!happy!

get ready for another round of kisses

Kiibo:

KIIBO HAS READ ALL ABOUT HIS AND HAS WATCHED LOTS OF ROMANCE MOVIES AND THEREFORE HE IS CONFIDENT TO TAKE YOU OUT AND HAVE A GOOD TIME unlike before 

he’s shows up to escort you two, dressed as well as a robot can be 

he’s constantly blushing the same color so when you gently take his hand your afraid that he’s going to overheat 

the date goes well! And the food is really good!

so you two return home..

he tells you to go look in your bedroom

.........

kiibo whAT

THERE’S HONESTLY NO ROOM, JUST PRESENTS

HOW DID YOU GET THESE IN HERE WHAT 

he explains that he couldn't decide what gift to get...

so he got them all

good luck eating all that, s/o

Tenko:

what of course Tenko has a plan, she’s a responsible woman who knows how to treat her s/o right 

internally, shes p a n i c k i n g

what if you don’t like her gift? what if you hate her afterwards?

she so scared that she wakes up early because of nerves

she’s pacing the kitchen floor by the time you come down 

“Tenko, its 4 in the morn-”

“AHH! H-HI THERE S/O I KNEW YOU WERE THERE DON’T WORRY I HAVE A SPECIAL GIFT FOR YOU AND I WOULD LIKE IT VERY MUCH IF YOU COULD TAKE IT BUT ITS OK IF YOU DON’T LIKE IT TENKO IS OK WITH THAT-”

  poor girl

she finally gives you the present, a cute little charm with a tiny bell on it

she’s stuttering about how it will match the one she has so you and her could be a matching couple 

but onLY IF YOUR OK WITH IT< ITS FINE IF YOU DON’T WANT TO

you tell her its perfect

she blushes and says her thanks, placing  kiss on your lips

Rantaro:

he’s been disappearing the past week for a couple of hours

you don’t really confront it because honestly your intrested on what he’s going to do.

so finally valentines day is here...

Amami doesn't mention anything all day, he gives you a present but thats at

and then you two head out for dinner.

And then you get a look at the place

lanterns, fine table cloths, waiters and people ready at your every comand

its like you two are royalty 

the food is divine and there’s live music and everything is in a deep red color which just makes you fall deeper and deeper in love withe the boy

whe you two are alone, he cradles your face and slowly kisses you, wraping his hands in your hair, by your waist, pressing closer and closer to you

its up to you what happens next ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

happy valentines day s/o ;)

Tojo:

you decide to do all the cleaning, and cooking for the day!

she gives you a kiss of thanks when returns home

you offer her a bath and she graciously accepts 

she tells you to join her, and who are you to deny her?

So your sitting naked with your lover also naked now

she’s 100% calm

internally she’s panicking

You wash eachother’s hair and wait until the water gets cold to get out

 you have her cosy pj’s laid out for her! new ones!

you serve dinner and force her to sit still because she will get up if you don’t keep your eye on her 

and then she brings up that she bought a pet...

she what

SHE WHAT

THE TOJO KIRUIMI HAS GOTTEN YOU A PET 

he did not 

oh my goD SHE DID YES SHE DID 

ITS A BUNNY AND IT LOOKS JUST LIKE HER

IT’S SO CUTE SHE EVEN BOUGHT IT A RIBBON 

lots of kisses for her! 

she explains that while they do shead, at least it can be kept in a certin area

and its like you two are parents now!

 you thank her sosoosos much 

happy valentines day!

Ouma:

oh no

oh no no no

don't get me started 

he’ll pretend he doesn’t know what day it is, the majority of the day is him complaining on why theres more couples outside than usual

your about to think that he forgot about it completely when he takes you out 

your blindfolded, and are just relying on him to guide you

you get there in one piece thankfully 

you and him are watching a movie, in his.. private? living room?

he’s got everything you could possibly need, chips, cookies etc.

so when the movie ends, its dead silent 

and then he slithers behind you, whispering in your ear

you two have been together for some time now...

so now might be a nice chance to start.... doing it

he of course is stuttering slightly and is clutching onto to tightly 

so... when you say yes....

he laughs, and carries into the other room 

no one is going to bed early tonight 

Shirogane:

she makes special clothes for you two! its a special day !

sweet walks in the park, and nice dinners at the local resturant, you two make the very best of the day 

you and her go shopping and critique a movie, and go feed birds

all in one day!

so when you get home your wiped

the bed is oh-so soft and fuzzy

your about to drift off to sleep when you hear her clear her throat 

you give a tired glance in her direction and bolt right up 

shes in loungerie

she made it herself 

you’re babbling and she’s blushing from head to toe

and now you can see very curve of her body, every hair that stands on end

and hell if she doesn’t look stunning 

she explains that she doesn't intend to do anything explicit... she just wanted to surprise you

well you’re definitely surprised 

you sleep close to her, for warmth as exhaustion takes over 

happy valentines!

[padfoot-ing-around]

Saved|| Andromeda & Sirius || Dec.20 ‘70

The snow was just starting to fall outside the large mansion house in the middle of the countryside. A huge, extravagant Christmas tree, decorated especially for the occasion filled the entire main foyer. It would have been a quiet evening, perfect for a book by the fire, if not for the party happening. 

The Blacks annual Christmas party was well underway, being hosted by a distant third cousin- twice removed, in their luxurious country vila. Carols were playing and the champagne flutes were being passed around. Some couples had started to dance on the floor to the sounds of a lively piano as the girls played. 

Sirius had found a fairly quiet corner, after having been dragged downstairs by mum, from where he’d been playing pogs with a cousin. 

“You need to socialize. You can’t go around hiding in the middle of a party. now go talk to your relatives and find your father.” She said sharply, pulling at his hair and sighing as she gave up. 

“I thought I told you to wear the red shirt.” She hissed, pushing him back into the main room. Sirius let out an audible groan at the sight of all the boring old people, getting a glare from his mother. He shut right up and found a comfy armrest, grabbing a glass of champagne on his way. No one would tell him otherwise. 

As soon as he found his spot it seemed like flies to honey, his weird uncle came calling. 

“Sirius! Come say hello!” He called over, obviously slightly intoxicated already. “Your father was just telling me about your spot on the Quiddich team. How’s the green doing this year, you leading ‘em to victory yet.”

For the ten billionth time, he reminded his family that he did in fact belong to the Gryffindor house. The conversation turned boring really fast. Sirius finished his champagne in under a minute and cursed himself that he hadn’t kept some to sip on to keep himself awake.

Does he think I care about his son’s business? Why does it sound like he’s trying to sell me a chair? I wonder if I get up right now and just walk away- nah shit, mums right there… Maybe I could get another glass? He knows theres a speck of green in his teeth right? God stop talking you stupid oaf.

“Oh yes yes I completely agree,” his aunt cooed, sucking up to the man. “What do you think about that SIrius?”

“Uh..” Sirius nodded, “Oh yes,” he said very enthusiastically (unbeknownst to them, with heavy sarcasm). “I completely agree.” he nodded, playing along. 

“I was wondering how to get them outta my garden when I realized- You just pay their child support!” The group burst out laughing. Sirius’ nervous laughter died away, wait what? 

“You see I have exactly the same problem!” A woman agreed, trying to interject herself into the conversation. 

Wow, that is one very big hat.

"Annnnnd I told Winston," she patted her husbands forearm, as he zoned out with his whiskey. 

"Huh? Oh yes." The man nodded. 

"I told him right before we left to Italy, and he didn't listen. And they stole his wallet, right off him!" The listeners gasped at such an exciting story. The woman revelled in the attention.

Sirius sat there, what are they talking about? 

"And you know me Col, I love muggles. I worked with them practically everyday for the last 20 years." 

"Yah well you have the patience of a saint." 

"Back then maybe. Couldn't do it now. The amount of times I would get calls from them, oh Merlin, asking for the craziest things. Really darling, but I swear they don't know how to take care of their kids. They don't parent." She stated as fact. 

 "Well that's why I always get balls through in my window!”

Haha he said ‘balls.’

“And Mikey got run over the other day by a car- got their driving permit in a chocolate frog box?" Laughter. "Well their system is a lot different. Culturally, we can't really expect them to follow normal rules. It's just impossible for them. Rules and laws don't carry any weight." 

"It's respect. They don't respect their elders and their parents don't discipline...”

“Then they end up calling us and we pay for their children on welfare. And the alcohol and the drugs, gosh!" 

 Sirius' eyes had begun to glaze over. A record three minutes before the muggle bashing had begun. 

"I told Tish that she could bring home a muggle boy, and you shoulda seen Howard. Oh Merlin! He nearly fell off the chair.” More laughter. “But you know, she has her eyes on other prospects-" the group went quiet and the eyes shifted to the young Black, who was currently staring at Aunt Helen trying to get her far arse up outta the seat. He burst out a laugh, which looked quite random to the eyes that were all watching him. He stopped finally and turned, realizing everyone who had been talking had suddenly stopped. He might as well have been picking his nose.

“Darling, come away from that piano and sit with mummy,” the woman called to Tish, a horrid looking girl. “Oh she just loves to play piano, can barely take her away from it! Did you just hear her play, she learned that piece in under a day! Sirius, do you play?” The woman’s hand was still waving in the air for her daughter to come join them.

“Uhhh..” Sirius looked like he wanted someone to shoot him. “No.” He said flatly.

“Man of few words!” His uncle laughed and pinched the back of his neck roughly. Sirius flinched away. 

“Tell them Tish, what you want to do this summer?” His aunt looked at him intently to make sure he was listening. Sirius tried not to roll his eyes and instead focused on the large pimple on Tish’s nose. 

“Well me and daddy were in the shop the other day and I saw this little girl and it like just inspired me. I’m gunna work with muggles, because like, everyone needs help and like who better to give it to them then us. Sometimes they just need to be saved.” 

“Brava! Not many young girls would volunteer with muggles. Thats so dangerous, you're so brave!” 

Sirius gave a snort. His smirk was spreading faster then herpies in the Hufflepuff house and he had to look at Tish, “wow. That’s pretty rad Tish.” he said as best he could. 

The girl giggled, “thanks. Like its the children I’m most worried about, yah know? They live such sad lives, if just wanna bring them some joy.”

Sirius nodded, his face feigning like he was getting her on a deep emotional level (fully sarcastic, though they wouldn't know that). “Mmmhmm oh yah, I understand.” he added. 

“Or we could just kill them all and call it a day.” he said flatly. His face was serious, as he deadpanned their shocked faces. 

[ryleejaybyrd]

ANSWER ALL THE EVENS BWAHAHA

Jesus christ Taylor XD Nobody cares but here I go!!!!!!!

lol like how I tried to play it off cool but I’m actually super stoked rn

2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day?

Yes and no... for like the first day of winter when it’s all pretty and pristine but when it get’s to the point of ‘fuck me do i still have toes?’ I’m over it.

4: how do you take your coffee/tea?

I like my coffee with french vanilla creamer and lovingly call it my princess froofroo bullshit drink. On the tea side of things I like herbal without anything added becuase I feel like a fairy drinking flower water.

6: do you keep plants? 

I love thinking I could, but the only plant I haven’t killed is the one that I keep in my papa’s sunroom where I’m never anywhere near it because everything I touch dies screaming.

8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings?

Is internal screaming a viable medium? I like to think I can write, but that’s still under investigation

10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach?

I’m all over the place, you can usual tell by my hair tho. Seeing as it sticks straight up on whichever side I sleep on.

12: what's your favorite planet?

Jupiter!! It has all those awesome moons that are v cool.

14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like?Hmmmmm, it’d probably be a homey mess of books, fandom knicknacks and random coffee mugs with random socks laying everywhere. (there may or may not be a smiley face painted on the wall that is outlined with bullets.. crazy night..)

16: what's your favorite pasta dish?

I’m very uncultured so spaghetti is how imma roll

18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up.

oh god, you mean every other moment I’m in their presence? My shining moment would probably be when I had a minor stroke after getting v excited about making cinnamon pancakes for @klskipper13​ and I stuttered so bad I said “ Cinininamonon pancancancakes” 

20: what's your favorite eye color?

Probably green! 

22: are you a morning person?

HAHAHAHA. that’s cute

24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets?

Honestly I’m a pretty open person? I’ll tell anyone anything, especially if I think it’ll make them laugh.

26: what are the shoes you've had for forever and wear with every single outfit?

YOU MEAN THE ONES THAT JUST BROKE AND I’M STILL GRIEVING OVER. They’re brown combat boots that go to just under my knee with laces all the way up. I lovingly named them my Katniss boots, may they rest in peace.

28: sunrise or sunset?

I like the idea of sunrise. There’s just something about beginnings that make me all poetic and shit

30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared?

Yup, 100% when my friend and I got busted after drinking at her mormon grandmothers house. In retrospect, probably should have done it elsewhere.

32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends.

At my 13th bday party my friends and I were staying at a house on a golf course and we streaked nude up and down the 18th hole. Till this day I wonder if they had surveillance cameras.

34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it?

It was a doe deer beanie baby named Whisper. She was that stuffed animal that went everywhere with me. At age 12 I lost her somewhere at my cousins house and am still sad about it till this day. She had one eye and a pink nail polish stain on her chest. Bonus story: my oldest friend @haleygalik​ had that same beanie baby and gave it to me since I was so upset about losing mine. I still have Whisper 2.0 till this day

36: which band's sound would fit your mood right now?Right now? Uuhh, I’m not sure tbh. I’m kinda feeling serene so something celticy. I’m also uncultured in music.

38: tell us about your pet peeves!

Dogs that beg when you try to eat. My dad passed that down to me. I will literally stare a dog straight in the eye and eat slowly. Don’t get me wrong, I love dogs more then humans, but that bothers me. I also get very twitchy when a computer desktop is just full of icons (yes I’m talking about you Tay.)

40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what's it's story? does it have any meaning to you?

I have this wedding band set that I found when my great grandma jay passed away. I think it was her wedding rings, but I never knew for sure. I wish I knew their story more then anything.

42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it!

There’s a shop that’s in our town called grump monkey. Its small and kinda modern themed but still comfy.

44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything?Hmmm, probably when I was swimming in the ocean last November. The ocean is my home.

46: tell us the worst pun you can think of.

The fact that Barbara Dunkelman from Rooster Teeth is so bad at puns she gave herself the title Barbara Punkelman....

48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today?

Being abducted by one of the aliens from Signs. Well duh.

50: what's an odd thing you collect?

Tbh I don’t collect anything really... but I do have a thing about small intricate boxes and bottles. I don’t usually keep them long tho. I move a lot.

52: what are your favorite memes of the year so far?

The only one I’ve noticed is the thing with the cowboy hat. I’m not the most observant

54: who's the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face?

I just saw a friend of my mom’s who’s brother passed away, that was rough.

56: what are some things you find endearing in people?

It is so great when people talk with their hands more and more as they get excited. The best story tellers look like they’re being pulled around by a drunk marionette person.

58: who's the wine mom and who's the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why?

@brigadepuppy​ is probably the wine mom, and @klskipper13​ is the vodka aunt who doesnt really drink but has a bottle thats filled with water so people wont nag her to drink with them.

60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves?

Robert Frost is my main bitch. His path diverging in a yellow wood will always be my fave. tho in english class we once read this poem about a lady who kept one of her lovers locked away in a hidden room and continued to sleep by the body even after the person died... to this day i cant find it anywhere. had something to do with roses. creepy as fuck but great.

62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind?

Orange is the bomb!

64: what color is the sky where you are right now?

a black satin canvas speckled with the iridescence of millions of different cosmic lights

66: what would your ideal flower crown look like?

Oh! I really like colorful leaves and vines instead of flowers.

68: what's winter like where you live?

A mythic bitch. #upperleft

70: have you ever used a ouija board?

Fuck to the no. I like not being haunted thank you. Tho, I am 100% convinced a ghost named Tina haunts me. I’ve had flickering lights, random bangs, and things falling off shelfs happen every once in awhile. I’m surprisingly calm about it mostly.

72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you'll forget it?

Absolutely. Helps keep my mind clear too. If i write it down it’s not swirling around in my brain and distracting me. Once its tangible its easy to toss aside.

74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns.

I have only two friends

Friend 1: My lil Asian

Friend 2: Lil Bitch

76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren't?

Oh for sure. I should be buying a ticket from Florida to New York, researching my trip to New Zealand, and double checking my bills are payed. HAHA NEXT QUESTION

78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub?

I’m a fanclub! I have a lot of love for people I’ve never met

80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why?

White, sadly. I didn’t, like I said. I move a lot.

82: are/were you good in school?

100% was a fly on the wall. Put in minimum effort and left with a 3.5 GPA cuz our school system is a joke.

84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones?

Yas!~ I want to do my Harry Potter house with my friends and something to do with space/the ocean or mythical creatures

86: do you like concept albums? which ones?

Uh sure, I totally know what those are and they’re great...

88: are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy?

The lil animatic videos people are doing for musicals! I love them so much!!! For example @galactibun​ and @raythrill​ do some really neat ones! (or at least I’m pretty sure they do??? I always see them blogging that style anyway)

90: talk about your one of you favorite cities.

Austin! Mainly because Rooster Teeth, but also it was such a vibrant place! I would like to live their someday.

92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch?

All the cheese. It’s cheese with a side of pasta. I love cheese.

94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday?

My Aunt Kelly!

96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot? 100%  procrastinator. They take forever.

98: when's the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it?

Way to long... uh probably last summer with a friends dog! Of course! Being outside is always cathartic

100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why?

I’d go into the past! I’d miss so much if I were to skip ahead that I’d feel anxious I think. 

Here you all go, XD thanks Tay, I appreciate you booboo

[fendergirl87-blog]

Biography of a women with PTSD and bi polar

The child's short-term response to abuse: For instance, an elevated heart rate post-abuse has been documented as increasing the likelihood that the victim will be later suffer from PTSD.

When aspen was 6 years old, Back when her and her twin sister still shared a room, one of her earliest childhood memories were sitting on her bedroom floor Being so confused and lost about her existence. She didn't understand why she was alive.

Tho her child was full of heart felt memories with her siblings and grandparents, but her own parents hardly played a part in that picture.

Her mom as emotionally unavailable. And her dad was physical and emotionally abusive. And not the little kind. He had spurts of anger that became physical and verbal attacks. Only to apologize for it shortly after or sometimes not. You never knew when it would happen. One of the first memories- being 6 years old running down the hallway, with my dad kicking her ass with his logging boot because they were running late.

His control was humiliating.

Being drug out to the car in the middle of church to be spanked and punished for being to rambunctious. As aspen got older the abused got worse and her mother turned a blind eye. When aspen was 9 she got in trouble for pulling razor blades off of pencil sharpeners and collecting them. She never hurt herself but her and her friend Leif would make pretend weapons with them. Not knowing how dangerous they were. She caught the attention of her teacher and was sent to the principal.

Aspen started going to art therapy because of it. she made cool crafts and drank soda with the art teacher. The only thing that she remembers about them talking about was about how her brother ran away and that she would never see him again.

The abuse of aspens father worsened by age. By 11 or 12 it became her fathers constant behavior. His moods worsened, his rules were stricter, and his physical abuse more prominent. My families denial worsened too. She was viewed as disrespectful, mouthy, and moody.

The blur of memories, the constant walking on egg shells and the rebellion of aspen worsened with age.

When aspens dad got mean and started to yell, didn't even have to say a word and he would either slap her across the face or her would threatened and belittle her.

He flew off the handle and the drop of a hat. It was a cycle.

I was walking in egg shells, trying to keep, the peace then it would happen. He would freak out. He would slap me across the face, pin me to the ground. punch me. Shove me. Threaten to break my bones.

The it would be over. Sometimes he would act like I asked for it. And that it was my fault for being disrespectful. And sometimes he say that he was proud of me for standing up for myself. Then everything would be ok for awhile. He would be kind and nice. But it only last for a little while.

The it would happen again. Sometimes not for a few days. Sometimes not for a week. But it always happened.

Over and over.

The fist fights the screaming. The name calling. The constant belittlment. And my constantly feeling of feeling bad started.

The first time aspen cut herself wasn't because of her father. Aspen started sexually experimenting with boys at 12 when she had her first boyfriend. It all started innocent like a first kiss but then she let her boyfriend do things to her. She like the attention. The worse time was probably when they were in band class together and they were sitting behind the piano. Off to the side of the room while the music teacher lead the class. Her boyfriend stuck his down her pants right in the middle of class. No one could tell with them both sitting behind a piano and her with a guitar in her lap. It didn't last for a few seconds. It was several minutes.

This groping thing became a new thing with aspens bf. they didn't see each other outside of school so they didn't have sex yet. They dated for a year.

I can't remember why we broke up tho. All this can remember is everything time aspen tried to break up with him he would say that he was going to hurt himself and finally after the 8th time of finally trying to break up with him she did. And he cut himself over it. Bad. Really bad. And that's where Aspen's battle with self harm started. She was 14 now. Interested in a new boy. One that like the things that she liked and was even in the school band with her. She started sneeking see him. He didn't live very far away.

The last time that she snuck out to see him she got naked for the first time in front of a boy. It all felt very awkward and uncomfortable. They didn't have sex but he touched her and tried to finger her. It felt painful and dry. Something like off a porno. Luckily she was able to make up an excuse to go home.

She really liked this boy but he didnt hardly talk to her except when he was horny. It broke her heart to feel so abandoned and unwanted.

That's when it happened. She was in the bathroom with a pair of scissors. She was so upset over this boy that she decided to try cutting herself. It something her ex bf did.

The panic feeling, the unbearable pain, the kind that makes your heart hurt and you can't breathe, well it all went away when she opened the scissors up and used one blade slice her forearm.

It was like everything went away.

The physical pain was so overpowering that I couldn't feel the heart ache. I could see and feel was the blood pouring. And it felt relieving.

Start cut more more as the fights got worse. My mother, she was never there for me she would go in the other roomand pretend to make cookies or she heard my dad screaming and hurting me. I cut the escape. I cut because it hurt too bad. I cut too feel numb.

It's not like I didn't have religion in my life I did have a big support system but I could never believe in God like everybody else and never spoke to me it never came I pushed and pushed it was never there. But neither was my identity.

At an early age i began to seek comfort in women, mostly people that were close to me or related to me. My mom did show me affection. She would hardly even hug me. She wouldn't talk to me about the hard stuff. She wouldn't talk to me at all. I found abandonment in the person that was suppose to protect and nurture me. So I improvised, a lot of my friends were older. My 7th grade teacher was one of my best friends and helped me through a really hard time in my life.

i thought it was obsession.wantiing to be close to them, seeking the comfort i was missing in my life from my own mom. My 4th grade teacher was the first person than i went to to seek comfort and love. She was an identical twin too, so she made it a point to always talk to me. One day, i found myself in the girl bathroom. I was only 9 at the time, i remembering pulling my sweatshirt hood over my head and feeling so alone but seeking comfort. The kind that they confuse with borderline personality disorder,

It didnt make sense. How all these feeling stuck with me. they never went away, all i every felt way alone. When i was in middle school,Ms shanahan became the person i went to for comfort, i even kept in contact with her until shortly after highschool. I cant explain our relationship. she was my teacher but she also felt like a person that no matter i could go to. So i did, and middle school was the best years. full of memories and support. When i entered highschool. Shas still there but not completely. I was withdrawn, Everything hurt too bad, I searched for the closeness that i could never reach. I nurturing and protectence.

how could i be surrounded by people and feel this way,

i never told anyone about these feelings. the obessiveness. To me it was just me, creepy and uncomfortable, well thats atleast how i felt.

I went through highschool. With near perfect grades and with a lot of athletic activities. I was involved in band and played the guitar which was a way to help me cope. But most of the time. The hurt was so bad, I could hardly breathe with my head above water. In 9th grade my heart started to race and my blood pressure was high all of the time. I remember getti a physical exam, which was required to compete in volleyball and the doctor that examined me pulled me in a room with us and asked me a million different times and in a million different ways if I was using illegal drugs like meth because my heart rate and blood pressure was so elevated. When I was in the 9th grade. My doctor put my on a high blood pressure medicine that is meant for old people and I was on a a hearty dose of Zoloft. All I ever wanted to be was numb.

Highschool was probably the worst time in my life and parts of it are really hard to remember. I was barely keeping myself alive between the extreme physically abuse of my father and the emtional burder that I had been carrying my whole life of never really feeling whole as a person. With all the broke and missing feelings. I kept myself alive by staying numb. And I began to start cutting alot. My left forarm became the main spot that I would cut myself that I would wear long sleeves to cover it up. Everything is such a blur.

I began pto feel differently. My attraction to women began to surface more clearly and I began to become interested in some of the girls in my school.

The cuts started small. But I began to cut everytime I became stressed. Then I became psychotic. It was anything to calm me down. To stop the overwhelming and feelings. The hatred towards myself started to build. I was trying to be a good daughter a good Mormon. While subconsciously dealing with a fight with my sexuality that I didn't realize until years later. I hated the way I looked even tho I was thin and muscular had great boobs.but all I ever felt inside for myself extreme disappointment and hatred. I cut to numb the pain of never feeling good enough. Never being a good enough person for the Mormon religion . Fighting feelings of attraction towards women. It was really confusing because I hadn't thought of myself as being born a lesbian. Things that like didn't happen in the Mormon faith. It didn't exist.

I felt different. Out of place. Days where I was struggling to survive. I've always wondered if it was this hard for everyone else? I never opened up to anyone. I had no close friends but mutal friends in chior. There was no one my age where I could tell anything to. I was stuck inside my walls. Inside my shell. The one person who I considered a special person that has greatly impacted my life was my techer mrs noland. She was my English teacher starting in the 9th grade. She was a person I clung to because of her nurturing personality. The things i lacked. She has become a very important person in my life because she was the only one there when I had absolutely no one. The only one for several years. When I was 10 or 11th grade. I took her poetry class and it became a way for me too write my feelings down inside. All the nasty thougts. It's kind of parculiar though because when I was in highschool I kept a huge binder of my poems in it. And some pretty detailed graphic ones about my fathers abused and magically I haven't been able to find that binder for years. It's like my parents found it and through it away because they didn't want anyone to know. There was things written in there that were so descriptive, it went into the wrong hands. I wish I could just read it. The proof of child hood abused leading to life time problems like complex ptsd.

To be continued.