#me @ klaus: good luck buddy

[kirythestitchwitch]

Klaroline WIP Wed - Freaky Friday Time Travel Fic - Part 4

Hi @galvanizedfriend this is your shout out! 😊

Part One here

Part Two here

Part Three here

He licked his lips, opened his mouth with a sly little tilt to his lips, dimples creasing his cheeks with whatever profane thing was about to come out, and quickly she clapped her hand over his mouth, her own cheeks burning. “Don’t answer that!” she hissed, “You could break the space-time continuum, and then what? The universe implodes!”

The warm vibrations of his muffled laughter trembled against her fingertips and she snatched her hand back. Rubbed the thumb of her other hand against the faint tingle on her skin.

“I doubt those particular details will break the universe, sweetheart,” Klaus said, that curling smile that spoke of a thousand intimate secrets between them hovering on his lips. “But you are correct. As delightful as you are, you do not belong here yet.” Something familiar and dangerous filled his gaze, chasing away the humor. “If you’re here, my Caroline seems to be somewhere else, probably wherever you came from. I would like to know what she will be walking into.”

Caroline frowned. Recalled to herself that odd sensation like she had stumbled past someone else in the brightness of the time travel. Had that been the other Caroline? “I was just studying for my finals in my room. It’s almost graduation. And you!” she said, stopping to look around the dark of the balcony floor.

“Yes?” The shadowed look in his eyes didn’t seem to lessen at the mention of graduation, if anything, his expression darkened further.

Spotting the necklace in the shadow of a potted plant and the wall, Caroline triumphantly fished it out and held it up. “You sent me this!” It dangled from one hand and even though she touched the pendant with the other, it remained inert. One way trip only, it seemed.

Klaus immediately made a face. “I did not.”

“Yes, you did.” Caroline swung it a little close to him and he leaned away from getting smacked in the face. “There was one of your paint boxes on my porch with my name in your handwriting on sketch paper taped to the top.”

“Sweetheart, that necklace is ghastly; I wouldn’t have desecrated your neck with it in a millennia. And that is the most inelegant presentation.” His tone turned grudging. “One does try to impress.”

“But… if you didn't give me this ugly thing then who did?” And who would go through such an elaborate setup to get her to open it?

Klaus shot her a slightly impatient look. “You can’t think of anyone in town making your lives miserable during that period?”

Caroline blinked. “Silas? What would he want with me, I’m not important–”

“Don’t say that.” His voice was firm but soft. An odd expression stole over his face, there and gone in a moment. Something about it left Caroline feeling lost before he spoke again. “As if you hadn’t been attempting to twist me around your fingers for months,” he said with good humor.

Her cheeks warmed. Of course he knew, he wasn’t an idiot, but he’d never called her on it. “It seems to have worked out for you,” she said, deciding to brazen it through and fish for information. Maybe it wouldn't hurt the universe too much to know a bit about her future?

Unfortunately, he seemed to see that for what it was and dimpled at her. “Quite.” With a hand, he beckoned her toward him as he backed into the bedroom. “Come, let’s get off the balcony, not all our neighbors sleep at night and I don’t want to be overheard.”

He disappeared around the corner and Caroline hesitated a moment and then followed him into the room, shutting the balcony doors behind her. It was spacious and gorgeous, and exactly what she would have chosen for a classically French apartment if given infinite money a free rein. It was with an odd sense of recognition that she realized that that was probably exactly what had happened.

Bare feet sinking into the plush rugs over the hardwood floor, she wandered around the room, looking at photos from a life she hadn’t lived yet: Caroline on an elephant beaming, Caroline and Bonnie in snow gear on a snowy mountain waving at the camera, Rebekah and Caroline in bikinis on the beach looking like the best of friends, Rebekah and Kol–Kol?!–and a dark-haired man with Caroline at a paintball course liberally covered in paint. Selfies of her and Klaus were also scattered throughout the frames in gorgeous locations. 

It painted a picture of a happy life and it made somewhere inside Caroline ache. Tyler and she were trying so hard to keep their relationship together despite everything that kept coming between them, and this made it look like everything was for nothing. Hayley’s shitty interference, Klaus himself driving him out of town, Tyler’s mad quest for revenge and the consequences that came from that.

There was a soft whoosh at her elbow and Klaus appeared as she was staring down at a picture of them in front of a gorgeous waterfall in a canyon, sitting on a bookshelf next to the door to the walk-in closet. In the picture Klaus was looking at her, not the camera, and the look in his eyes was one of the most romantic things she’d ever seen. 

“Where was this?” she asked softly. She wasn’t sure if she was starting to feel lightheaded or if that was the anxiety churning in her stomach but whatever it was she was not enjoying it. 

He looked over at the photo, the corner of his mouth curling at some unknown memory. He’d pulled a loose grey V-neck t-shirt on along with a pair of shoes, and his pants appeared to have been fastened properly, finally. A blood bag was held in one of his hands. Caroline tried not to look too hungrily at it. “Morocco. We hiked into Akchour Falls, where Caroline took that picture.”

Something caught her eye in the photo and she leaned closer. “Hold on…” It took her a second to be sure, but the Caroline in the photo was definitely wearing a rock and a gold band on the ring finger of her left hand.

“Ah, about that–” “We’re married?!” Caroline nearly shrieked.

[sweetpastillas]

tom & elliot's role swap video is interesting to me because . what if luther and viktor Did switch some places in s4?

this would likely include [this is an au idea]:

a down-on his-luck luther, shifting through various jobs

in hindsight i just want more depth back for him

in this au, sloane is fully dead via reginald incompletely programming the universe & allison pressing the button early. let's visualize all the flashback montages we should have gotten over their 6 years, and insert in one where he finds her grave.

(this would cut to ben finding this out in a phone call, scowling with a hint of mourning, before turning away to greet more of his crypto buddies)

it says something like "sacrificed her life saving people from the fire of the hotel obsidian [or something heroic]."

he has no picture of her

it's not a timeline where he's fucked up, like the unshaven floorcrying on the moon or s1's furry rave breakdown. he's numb. happy to go to family events, not as stoic as s1, but numb every once in a while

he still picks up ben from prison. hugs him too tight – ben complains once.

he actually squeezes more often in his hugs. death is too real. klaus gets it but still panics for closeness and germs as they meet at the party

viktor, on the other hand, is as neutral as he's always been. happy without his powers, able to take deep breaths dealing with annoying regulars at the bar without rattling all the bottles on his shelves

he's happy to be part of the family – it's not like he has sissy or harlan left. so he answers his calls, sends the niblings pictures of canada wildlife, and is happy to go to every meetup. he's missed only a couple, because distance.

viktor's still the one most pissed about his powers coming back, at least. "i could put us at risk and the end the world again."

it's luther who's even more visibly awkward when allison shows up to grace's 6th. everyone can assume it's because of oblivion, but we the audience can guess it could be about the rumor SA and their complex history

we can take it to the town with keepers and evil santa – viktor and allison could have a different scene, one that acknowledges where they are now

("we've killed each other's children, we've hurt each other, but you asked me to trust you and i did." "i guess i can't ask you to be in my corner then." "show me a good reason to; i know you can" *cue proper alli redemption arc*)

but alli/luther... there's more hurt there because really the show broke their closeness and put a transparent bandaid to pretend it's still there despite s3. they used to be besties with a childhood that turned them into exes and circumstances have changed that into worse

so it's luther who tells her that "we can't be anything else, right now.. i don't think we can even be friends. i'm sorry"

allison and that brilliant thing where emmy raver lampman acts out trying not to cry

take your pick of reasoning – the SA, or he blames her in part along with reg for not programming sloane into the timeline. either because she went with it, or because she pressed the button early

in my au we settle loose ends btw. they talk it out or help each other in battle, as long as they make truce at the end.

we keep the exact scene as from the roleswap video. we also keep the deleted conversation with diego later on.

if we have to actually integrate the cia in any way (bc in this world, five works at an actual deli and spies on the keepers at night) one of them finds various files on them, and sloane too. takes the picture of her to keep it.

i say one of them because a viktor-diego arc would be cool and luther travelling with reg, actually calling the shots better would be interesting.

viktor's the one who both gets an insight into diego's vigilante fighter style, and is also there to let him figure out that change is ok. "the civilian life isnt so bad, here's an anecdote from something i actually liked about being ordinary back in the original s1 timeline."

(have i also said this au is just lila and diego missing the action in their lives but without cheating. they both work 9-5s and are tiredly trying to keep up and this is settled later)

no matter what the picture ends up in luther's hands by the end

it's what luther clutches amidst a proper final battle and ending, hoping to find sloane in the next life

[billboard-hotties-tourney]

The Round Two Contenders

Hello, all! As we go into round two, I'll be accepting propaganda for only the following nominees:

Sting

Glenn Gould

Link Wray

Curtis Mayfield

Bob Seger

Oscar Peterson

Eric Stewart

Klaus Voormann

Paul McCartney

Gene Autry

Rod Argent

Fang

Freddie Mercury

John Paul Jones

Sly Stone

Tom Scholz

Justin Hayward

Roger Hodgson

Bo Diddley

Rick Wright

Gram Parsons

Geddy Lee

Ray Manzarek

Sam Cooke

Jimi Hendrix

David Gilmour

Noel Redding

Fats Domino

Eric Burdon

Jim Morrison

Bjorn Ulvaeus

Smokey Robinson

Nat King Cole

Dave Davies

Ray Brown

Ron Mael

Ian Curtis

Arlo Guthrie

Micky Dolenz

Syd Barrett

Chuck Berry

Renato Zero

Bruce Springsteen

Al Green

Miles Davis

Bill Bruford

Charles Brown

Mickey Finn

Bob Marley

Eric Dolphy

Neil Peart

Alan Parsons

Brian May

Neil Diamond

Mick Taylor

Robin Zander

Billy Preston

Mik Kaminski

Tony Bennett

Mick Ronson

Steve Miller

Tony Levin

Johnny Cash

Stevie Wonder

Gordon Lightfoot

Frank Zappa

Ernie Ford

David Coverdale

Marvin Gaye

Buddy Holly

Marc Bolan

Rory Gallagher

Todd Rundgren

Willie Dixon

Joe Strummer

Carl Palmer

David Bowie

Alvin Lee

Rick Danko

Clyde McPhatter

Cab Calloway

John Oates

Kenny Loggins

Roy Orbison

John Fogerty

Richie Havens

Ricky Nelson

Denny Laine

Otis Redding

Dave Vanian

John Coltrane

Elton John

BB King

Dean Martin

Rob Grill

Don Henley

Russell Mael

Jimmy Page

Cat Stevens

Tommy Shaw

Robbie Robertson

Phil Ochs

David Byrne

Steve Winwood

Donald Fagen

Carlos Santana

Peter Hammill

Tom Jones

Bev Bevan

Clarence Clemons

Sammy Davis Jr

Robert Lamm

Bobby Darin

Johnny Mathis

Tony Banks

Robert Plant

Brian Eno

Benny Andersson

Barry Gibb

John Deacon

Pete Seeger

Phil Lynott

Andy Gibb

George Harrison

Mickey Hart

Prince

Jack Bruce

Keith Moon

Those in bold have lots of propaganda already, so they're low priority. Rules for submitting propaganda are in the FAQ. If there are multiple people in the photo, please tell me which one the propaganda's for. Good luck to the round two musicians!

[botanicallyinclinednerd]

The Umbrella Academy season 2 episode 10

Oh good! I wanted to know details of Ben's death! 2006, huh

My blood is fucking boiling

How fucking DARE he

They are all grieving so much. They are children

Guuyyyssssss

God they suck towards each other and I know it's not their fault but GUYS YOUR BROTHER'S FUNERAL BE NICE TO EACH OTHER

KLAUS

SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP

Oh. Oh no. I dont- I don't think that true. Klaus, honey, did your selfishness and refusal to let your brother go prevent him from ever being able to leave you? Until- well until he saved Vanya? (It did not)

The implications of Klaus doing that blue hand thing here means that he's KNOWN how to do that. He knew he could do that in s1, that was NOT a new power, it was an old one he refused to use

FIVE "I do feel like I'm being held hostage most days"

Guyyyssss this is exactly like what happened with Ben's funeral all over againnnnn. Stop. Fightinggggg

Vanya I love you

Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you

I hate this fucking family

I am taking away one of those fuck yous, as long as Klaus doesn't get out of this car

*OH*

EEE!!!

*deep breath* I am calm and I have hope for this fucking family

GUYS FIVE TOLD YOU TO STAY WITH VANYA AND HARLAN THIS IS NOT STAYING WITH VANYA AND HARLAN

Oh holy shit

Oh so he can teleport with others!

Big fan of the fact they repeatedly show us that Five has limits with his powers, that he can't use them when he's too tired

Luther holding Allison and Klaus to try and protect them

*O H*

Yup she uh. The answer to my question "does she have powers or is she with the commission" was "Yes"

Is her power the ability to mimic the powers of those she's faced?

"But unfortunately, they're family, so you're shit out of luck" Luther grew on me a lot this season

Oh no

FUCK

ALLISON

Luther I think you're gonna have to breathe for her, or do cpr once she's "dead" okay cool, glad it was the first one, the second one was not ideal

How many children has she stolen over the years, turning into her little weapons

Get the fuck away from Harlan you bitch

Yes, yes they do. They are dysfunctional as hell and they keep hurting each other, but there's no doubt that there is love there

She's gonna stab Diego

WELL FUCK

Oh did five actually die with the group this time? Hey! He didn't have to out live them a third time! Wooo!

Well. Is this why season 3 is an alternate time line? Cause all these bitches dead. Wait. *big sigh* I'm going to have to relearn all these characters again aren't I? Fucking bullshit

Alright Harlan, it's all on you buddy, good luck

There's still 18 minutes left...

OH COME ON FIVE, YOURE NOW THREE FOR THREE ON OUTLIVING YOUR SIBILINGS

(I dont actually want Five dead, I just feel bad for the amount of trauma the poor guy has around his dead sibilings)

OH MY GOD I FORGOT ABOUT THE FINAL SWEDE

HERE COMES HANDLER TO FINISH OFF FIVE, AND! WHATS THIS! IN COMES THE SWEDE WITH A MACHINE GUN!!!

OH HERE WE GO FIVE YOU CAN DO IT

!!!!

Yay! He's okay!

Herb and Dot!!!

LETS GO HERB!!!

😭😭😭😭

So happy over each positive sibiling interaction I get

Klaus hugging Vanya!!!

Another shoe is gonna drop here

Are they gonna meet the Sparrows in these last couple minutes?

YEAH, WHY IS THERE A PAINING OF BEN OVER THE MANTLE PEICE AND WHY IS HE WEARING RED

NO

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU

IM OUT

[pretend-writer]

Demolition Lovers (Hargreeves x sibling!reader)

Summary: Klaus and Y/N helps their brother, Luther find a perfect date.

Title Reference: Demolition Lovers x My Chemical Romance

Word Count: 1.6k words

Warning: swearing, mention of sex

✤  ·  ✤  ·  ✤  ·  ✤  ·  ✤

It was a typical day at the Hargeeves mansion. Klaus and I hanging out as we lay across the couch next to each other, scrolling through our social media and sharing celebrity gossips that was trending that day.

Diego would then barge in, bothering us to get up and be productive but then end up eaves dropping and joining our conversation.

Then we'd have Vanya that'll feed us our daily snacks. She was like a mama bird; Hearing the rest of us complaining and bickering then feeds us the goodies to shut our mouth. It honestly worked every time and now I start to wonder if that was her trick all along.

After our snack was nap time, where Klaus and I would lay there for two to five hours, usually get up when the sun was down. Then we would plan our night, typically out for dinner or a night out if it was the weekend.

But our schedule, our precious paradise time was ruined by the one and only. Luther Hargreeves.

It wasn't supposed to be this way; Allison would go out to run errands, Ben worked all day like the responsible man that he was, and Five would just be Five, roaming town and doing God knows what. Luther would be home to research and dig through dad's old stuff.

Today however, wasn't the case.

He instead came in during mine and Klaus' precious nap time, groaning and yappin' about some girl on an app. Didn't know why he had to do this in the family room but there he was.

'Do you not see us sleeping here?' I complained as I lifted my head from the pillow, trying not to move a lot so that Klaus could stay asleep.

'Sorry, sorry. I didn't mean to be loud.' He apologized as he stared at his phone, depressed and upset.

Klaus rolled his eyes. 'Well you are and you're still here.'

Luther froze in place, continuing to stare at the screen. Klaus and I looked at each other, nudging one another to see who was going to talk to him first.

The both of us got up, sitting down side to side as we looked at Luther and back at each other. Klaus seemed like he was unbothered, so I sighed and broke the silence. 'What's wrong buddy?'

'Nothing.' Luther frowned.

Squinting my eyes, I grabbed the pillow from the couch and threw it on Luther's head. 'You bitch! You woke us up from our nap and you're going to say "nothing" is bothering you?'

'Ow!' Luther rubbed his head. 'Okay, okay. Damn. It's this girl on tinder, she doesn't want to go on a date with me.'

'Well, what did you tell her? Did you say something stupid?'

Luther got up, 'See. This is why I didn't want to tell you guys becau-'

'Sorry, sorry.' I stood up and pulled Luther back onto the couch. 'Mind if I see the conversation?'

His face immediately turned red, 'Uhm. Do you have to?'

'If you want me to figure out why she's turning you down, yeah.'

Hesitantly, he pulled up the messages he had with the girl and then passed me the phone. Scrolling through the messages, I shook my head. 'Luther, she's DTF.'

'Yeah, I know that's why I don't understand why she turned me down. She brought it up first.'

Klaus blinked, 'What do you think DTF stands for?'

By the look on Luther's face, I knew he was confused. He looked over at the ceiling, thinking for a while before he replied to Klaus. 'Don't tell me I was wrong this whole time.'

'So what do you think it says?'

'Uhm... Date This Friday?'

Klaus awed, shaking his head as he left my side and took a seat next to him. He wrapped his arms around Luther, 'Buddy. No. That's not what it stands for. But that's cute of you.'

'Wait, huh? So this whole time me and her were on the wrong page? What did she mean then?'

'She wanted to fuck you.' I blurted, I felt bad that Luther was so confused. 'It stands for Down To Fuck.'

It was a dead giveaway that he had no clue what his whole conversation really meant, his whole face turned redder than ever. He buried his face into his hands. 'Oh no.'

'I didn't think you were talking to girls, honestly.' Klaus chuckled. 'You clearly got game, your noggin is just a little... outdated.'

'I got what? Game? No, I just deleted Candy Crush, it was too addicting.'

Klaus kept his laugh in, curling his lips as he slowly nodded back at his brother. 'Oh my gosh.'

✤ · ✤ · ✤ · ✤ · ✤

It had been about two weeks, helping Luther get a dream girl that he deserved. Despite Luther being the annoying sibling, he had been there for me countless times and I wanted nothing but the best for him.

We've tried talking to the girls on the app, few weren't looking for anything serious, some trolling in the messages. After constant matching and messaging, Luther found someone he potentially saw a relationship with.

'Did you check your message from Claire yet?' Klaus asked.

'No. I'm kind of nervous, actually.' Luther laughed a little under his breath, shaking his legs as he gripped onto his phone.

Resting my hand on his shoulder, I reassured him. 'Don't be nervous, I'm sure she said yes to your date.'

Luther sighed, turning on his phone and scrolling through his messages. As his face lit up, he jumped off his seat. 'She said yes!'

Klaus got up and cheered, hugging Luther tightly. 'I knew it! So what time and where?'

'Ah- Uhm. Why... do you need to know?' Luther paused.

'Cause we're coming to watch.'

'No, no, no. I don't need you two spying on me. I'm already nervous as it is.'

'Yeah, Klaus let's just let him be. He's a big boy now.'

'But-'

'Let's give him the space he needs, Luther definitely needs his alone time with his girl.'

Klaus rolled his eyes, 'Okay. Have fun and tell me everything when you get home.'

A smile hasn't fade away since he saw the text; He was grinning widely than ever, never seen him this happy in my entire life. 'This is going to be so awesome!'

'Good luck buddy.' I smiled as I watch him do his little happy dance going up the stairs to get ready.

Klaus groaned, crossing his arms and pouting like a little child. 'Why can't we go spy on Luther?'

'But we are. I just wanted him to think we weren't.' I wanted nothing but the best for Luther, if it meant that he was going to have a perfect night with his perfect date, I was going to be protective of my brother.

'Perfect! I need to get my spy gear on.'

✤ · ✤ · ✤ · ✤ · ✤

With the binocular in my hands, I looked into the restaurant Luther picked for the both of them. 'Oh my gosh, he looks so cute with his little bow tie.'

Luther was blushing, talking nervously with Claire. It seemed like it was going well, no awkward moment or embarrassing moment between them.

I looked over at Klaus, who was being too quiet next to me in the passenger's seat. He had a rather thick file in his hand. 'What are you reading?'

'Claire's life.' Klaus chuckled. 'She's smart as hell, really pretty. I'd say we did a pretty good job helping Luther.'

'How did you get a file on her life?'

Klaus smiled innocently, 'Ah. I followed Diego into his ex's job and got Ben to steal it for me.'

'You what?' I leaned my head back, staring at the car ceiling as I sighed. 'Klaus, Eudora is my friend. If she finds out that you stole someone's files from the police department, she'd hate me.'

'My bad, Y/N. If it makes you feel better, Ben rejected me a bunch of times. I made a deal with him that he could take over my body for three hours for the files.'

'Whatever.' Looking through the binoculars again, I asked him another question. 'So you didn't ask Diego to get it for you?'

Klaus shook his head. 'Nah, if I ever told him I knew he'd want to come with us to stalk Luther. I wanted some Klaus Y/N alone time.'

'Aw.' I said but immediately stopped. 'Are you saying this to make me forgive you?'

'Is it working?'

'Depends how the night goes.' After a sarcastic smile, I snatched the file off of his hand. 'Why did you want to steal this anyway?'

'You ask so many questions.'

'I know.'

It was rare for Klaus to do "the responsible thing", that was more of a me, Allison or Five's criteria. I couldn't think of a possible reason why he'd go out of his way to take a file to investigate on this girl.

'It's Luther, you know. I wanted to make sure he was going out with someone that won't screw him over again.'

'That's the nicest thing you've ever said.'

'Luther better appreciate this because I'm not going to jail for this shit.'

I smiled at my brother. 'Don't worry. I gotchu.'

A loud scream came from the entrance of the restaurant, Luther approaching us quickly as he eyed the both of us.

'Duck!' I yelled at Klaus as we tried to hide ourselves from his sight.

'Don't bother. I saw you guys from the restaurant!' Luther said as he knocked on the window. 'Why are you guys here? You told me you wouldn't come.'

'I know, I know.' I rolled the window down and squealed as I reached for his bow tie. 'I just couldn't resist! You look so adorable, brother.'

He grunted, 'Stop. Guys go home, you're going to ruin this date with the woman that I love.'

'Woah! Love!?' Klaus and I said in sync.

Luther covered his mouth. He mumbled into his hand. 'Pretend I didn't say that!'

'Pretend?' I laughed, 'Luther. I can't pretend, I'm sorry. That was sort of funny. A little little little bit cute but mostly funny as hell.'

Klaus reached over me to grab onto his hand. 'Dude, you're already whipped but that's okay. But Y/N's right. It's a bit funny not going to lie.'

'I'm whipped?' Luther cocked his head. 'I don't do that sort of foreplay during se-'

'Luther, that's not what it means!'

[seanfalco]

A little Positivity ✨

@elliethesuperfruitlover challenged us to spread some positivity this week and I think that’s a great idea. 💚

As I’m sure several of you have noticed, it’s been a little quiet lately in this little corner of tumblr and honestly I had a bit of a rough night over it last night, but I thought about it and when I started writing for Rob’s characters over a year ago, it was quiet then too and I didn’t really expect anyone to read my fics.

And I am so so grateful to those of you who have and who have taken the time to tell me how much you enjoy my silly little stories. And while some familiar names have gone quiet, due to irl stuff or found interest in other fandoms, I appreciate you.

Sometimes I lose sight of what’s important and need to remind myself (and that’s okay!). At the end of the day I know I would and still will be writing even if just for myself, because it brings me joy and that’s what’s important. I love the stories I want to tell and I love the little community that has been built up here. It may be small, but it’s good. Yep, still good.

I have made so many wonderful friends that I talk to on the daily/weekly because of our shared interest and you guys make my life even outside of fandom so much better. I want to take a moment to mention some people (and fellow writers) specifically that I would never have met otherwise and who I am incredibly thankful for:

@santacarlahorrorshow — the first person I met when starting to think about writing for Klaus. Mel has been an encouragement and inspiration for me from the beginning and quickly became a fast friend even outside of fandom through our shared love of horror films (and salt lol), and I honestly don’t know what my life would be like without her in it.

@super-unpredictable98 — my other constant companion and writing partner. We bonded through our ocs and I love this incredibly self indulgent and expansive au that we’ve created with all my heart. I admire Flor’s passion for these characters, even the most minor of Rob’s roles. I also don’t think I could survive a day without talking to her.

@magic-multicolored-miracle — whom I dragged here with me from the Witcher lol. Shye is always there to offer support or offer a listening ear to everyone and I’ve been so excited to see her expand the characters she writes for and her passion for those minor characters that don’t get as much love as they deserve.

@salvador-daley — a recent friend and confidante who always gives great advice (even if she doesn’t think so), especially when I don’t always want to hear it lol. Salv’s been nothing but supportive and understanding and is honestly the big sister I never had. Not only that, but she’s an exceptional writer as well, whose prose and imagery always blows me away.

@elliethesuperfruitlover — a constant source of positivity and support, and probably the glue that holds us all together. I can’t wait to see them grow and continue improving their writing no matter what interest holds their attention at the moment.

@bisexualnathanyoung — one of the first friends I made in the fandom and whose discord server has been a refuge and a joy to be a part of. Ry was probably the first person I really started talking to about my ocs and I love listening to them ramble about their’s and all their thoughts and headcanons. They’ve been there for me during some shitty times and I appreciate the heck outta them.

Some other people that I look up to, who have been there for me, and who I’m so thankful to know and be able to call my friends: @curtis-donovan, @falcor-thee-luck-dragon, @immortalled, @maerenee930, @catsnathan, @spanishmossmagnolia, @badsext, @the-freckled-luba, @forenschik, @070188, @haschen-writes, @seancekitsch, @ghouls-buddy, @emelieislasheehan, @handgrenadehopeful — I love you guys all so much! 💖

[angelicamerlinbarnes]

Okay but like I feel like Diego is the kind of person to flirt with really bad pick-up lines and Klaus is just Not Having It

featuring: Diego being a flustered Mama's boy and Klaus being a disaster dumbass and the two of them being completely in love with each other anyway

DISCLAIMER: None of the pick-up lines are mine, but the responses and ensuing shenanigans are :)

(there's fifty of these so buckle up kids :) sorry not sorry <3)

seriously though some of these are really bad

#1: He A Snack

Diego: Baby, you belong in the vending machine because you’re a snack.

Klaus: Diego you know I’m claustrophobic.

Diego: Don’t you mean Klaus-trophobic??? *finger guns*

Klaus: *blinks*

Klaus: I want a divorce.

#2: I’m From Hell

Diego: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?

Klaus: I’m a veteran addict and abuse victim who can see ghosts, Diego.

Klaus: Everything hurts.

#3: Animal Puns

Diego: *points to TV screen playing the Discovery Channel* Hey Klaus.

Diego: You’re my otter half.

Klaus: Diego those are meerkats.

#4: Stars

Diego: The stars are beautiful tonight.

Klaus: Yup.

Diego: You know who else is beautiful?

Klaus: Ben.

#5: Get Out Your Handcuffs Mister

Diego: You’re under arrest… for stealing my heart.

Klaus: Diego you got kicked out of the police academy like five years ago, just give up.

#6: Bad Boys

Diego: *leaning against the doorframe like a moron* So. I hear you like bad boys.

Klaus: Diego you cried because you accidentally stepped on a bee last week.

Diego: Well yeah but -

Klaus: You held a funeral for it. You made us all speak. You had Allison fly in from California. It was a fucking bee, Diego.

Diego: … I wear leather?

Klaus: So does every other kid who shops at Hot Topic. You’re not special.

#7: Prince Charming

Diego: Your knight in shining armor is here -

Klaus: One, that’s a turtleneck, not armor.

Klaus: Two, you’re covered in blood. That’s the opposite of shiny.

Klaus: Three, you smell like dead fish. Go take a shower.

#8: Chemistry

Diego: Did we have a class together? Because I could’ve sworn we had -

Klaus: Chemistry? Yup. Also English and math and foreign languages and history and like every other fucking thing because we grew up in the same sadistic boarding school, Diego.

#9: The Store Can’t Just Give Away Things For Free. That’s A Terrible Way To Run A Business.

Diego: I like your pants.

Klaus: Thanks. I got them out of a dumpster. And yes, you can have them 100% off.

Diego: *voice cracks* Really?

Klaus: No.

#10: Boyfriend Material

Diego: My jeans are made of -

Klaus: You’re wearing leather pants Diego.

Diego: Okay but -

Klaus: So they’re made of leather and they’re not fucking jeans.

#11: Digits

Diego: I lost my phone number. Can I have -

Klaus: None of us have phones, Diego.

Diego: I can… buy us some?

Klaus: Fine. I want my number to be 1-420-420-4201.

Diego: Baby no.

Klaus: *pulling out the puppy dog eyes* Pwetty pwease?

Diego: Fine, but mine’s gonna be 1-696-969-6969.

Klaus: I love you so much. Marry me. Have my babies.

#12: Love At First Sight

Diego: Do you believe in love at first sight or -

Klaus: If I did I’d have already fallen in love with a lot of hot ghosts.

Diego: - should I walk by again?

Klaus: You’ve been pacing for the past ten minutes, Gogo. I think if it was gonna happen it would’ve by now.

#13: You Have Fine Written All Over You

Diego: Are you a parking ticket? Cause -

Klaus: Diego I can’t drive.

#14: His Eyes Are Green Not Blue You Dipshit

Diego: Your eyes are an ocean, and I’m lost at sea.

Klaus: ... can’t you, like, hold your breath forever?

Diego: *blinks* Baby, I love you, but you’re ruining this with our childhood trauma.

Klaus: Well since you’ve refused therapy I just thought this was the next best option.

Diego: I take back what I said about loving you.

#15: Math Is Dumb And I Wish School Would Stop Teaching It

Diego: Are you a forty-five degree angle?

Klaus: Actually, because humans have non-linear body shapes, it’s impossible for their specific angles to be measured -

Diego: Are you high or have you been defiling Five’s books again?

Klaus: *blinks* Why can’t it be both?

Diego: *rethinking life decisions*

#16: Baby I’m All Yours

Diego: Do you have a name?

Klaus: Klaus.

Diego: Or can I call you mine?

Klaus: I mean I prefer “baby”, but sure.

Diego: *super wide eyes* Really?

Klaus: *melts into a puddle of glitter* Yeah, Gogo.

#17: (Not) Bookworms

Diego: Thank god I brought my library card. Cause I’m here to check you out.

Klaus: *through a mouthful of waffles* God isn’t real. We all die and rot beneath the earth to be eaten by maggots. There is no such thing as a higher power.

Klaus: *swallows waffles and takes a really loud slurp of an orange juice and chocolate milk combo*

Klaus: Oh, and the library’s closed for renovations til, like, Christmas so you’re outta luck, sorry.

Diego: I thought you met god? Little girl on a bicycle?

Klaus: Her? Nah, only Satan’s got that much sass. Plus, that wasn’t heaven.

Diego: And you know this how?

Klaus: *squishes Diego’s face with both hands* Think about it. Do you really think dear ol’ dad’s in heaven?

Diego: Can you let of my face please?

#18: Bad Move, Buddy

Diego: Are you a pre-historic fossil? Cause you’re my missing link.

Klaus:

Klaus:

Klaus:

Klaus: Did you just call me old?

Diego, backing out of the room slowly: What? No! No of course not! No, obviously no, absolutely not -

Klaus: *releases savage war cry*

Diego: *runs for his goddamn life*

#19: I Rate This 0/10

Diego: Are you from Tennessee? Cause you’re the only -

Klaus: I don’t know where I’m from. I’m an orphan.

Diego: Oh… I know, baby -

Klaus: And the piece of shit that adopted me lived in New York anyway. We’re in New York right now actually. Do you need a geography lesson? I think Pogo’s got a map -

Diego: Klaus.

#20: Oh Shit

Diego: If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing?

Klaus:

Klaus:

Klaus:

Klaus: *tears up* I’m nothing?

Diego: Oh no. No no no. No, baby, you’re not nothing, don’t cry, I’m so sorry, that’s not what I meant, baby - oh my god please don’t cry -

#21: You’ve Got Everything I’m Searching For

Diego: Is your name Google? Because -

Klaus: Diego. For the last time…

Klaus: My name is Kimberly Linda Aerealia Ulysses Saffron Hargreeves the Twenty-Fourth. I don’t know why I need to keep explaining this to you -

Diego, kissing him quiet: You’re my favorite person in the world, you know that?

#22: Don’t Make Bets You’ll Lose, Luther.

Diego: Luther bet me a hundred bucks I couldn’t talk to the prettiest person here. How do you wanna spend his money?

Klaus: Drugs.

Diego: Baby -

Klaus: *beams* Nah, I’m just kidding. Stuffed giraffes.

Diego: *grins* For Five?

Klaus: *nods* For Five.

Diego:

Klaus:

Diego: He’ll hate them.

Klaus: Exactly. Let’s go.

#23: Deja Vu

Diego: Have we met before?

Klaus: Yes. Obviously. Are you also high?

Diego: No -

Diego: Wait, you’re high?

Klaus:

Diego:

Klaus:

Diego:

Klaus: No?

#24: Such An Optimist

Diego: Are you a time traveller?

Klaus: No, that’s Five.

Diego: Cause I think you’re my future!

Klaus: *stares blankly*

Diego: No? Nothing? Nada?

Klaus: In the future we’re all dead dipshit.

Klaus: Because. Ya know.

Klaus: THERE’S A FUCKING APOCALYPSE COMING.

Diego:

Diego: Okay then.

#25: Please Go To The Hospital.

Diego: Are you my appendix? Cause my stomach’s fluttering and I think I should take you out.

Klaus:

Klaus: Did you drink water from the fish tank again?

Diego: *turning green* Luther dared me to okay???!!!!

#26: Suicidal Tendencies

Diego: Hey gorgeous -

Klaus: Let me guess. I should drop dead?

Diego: What?! No! Baby -

#27: Infinitely On The Naughty List (And Not The Good Kind Of Naughty List (If There Is One I’m Asexual I Don’t Know))

Diego: Are you Santa Klaus? Cause you make all my wishes come true.

Klaus:

Klaus:

Klaus:

Klaus: You have five seconds to run.

Diego: *already two streets away* Fucking shit -

#28: You Can’t Use That Every Time We Have An Argument, Tony.

Diego: Kiss me if I’m wrong, but dinosaurs still exist right?

Klaus: I mean, there’s one in the corner of our living room right now, so I guess?

Diego:

Diego:

Diego:

Diego: *squeaks* You - you can see dinosaur ghosts?

Klaus: I mean, there’s a chance that thing Ben’s petting is just a super deformed ostrich, but yeah, I think so.

Diego:

Diego:

Diego:

Diego: *tearing up* That’s so cool.

#29: A Whole New Kind Of Thirst Trap

Diego: I’m thirsty. But guess whose body is 75% water?

Diego: *smirks*

Klaus: *frowns*

Klaus: Hold on, I know this one…

Diego: Klaus -

Klaus: *snaps fingers* Oh, I know! Luther!

Diego: *horrified* What the fuck Klaus why the fuck would you say that -

#30: What A Tragedy

Diego: You must be a campfire. Because you’re super hot and I want s’more.

Klaus:

Klaus: Diego sweetheart, you’re allergic to marshmallows.

Diego: *tearing up* I know.

Klaus: You wanna hug, baby?

Diego: *crying* Yes please.

#31: That Can’t Be Allowed

Diego: Don’t tell me if you want me to take you out to dinner. Just smile for yes, or do a backflip/somersault/counter-spin gymnastics combination for no.

Klaus: *smirks*

Klaus: *does a triple flip and lands perfectly on the top of the bar counter*

Diego: *turns bright red* That was h-h-hot.

Klaus: *beams and jumps down into Diego’s arms bridal-style*

Klaus: *kisses his cheek* I know, baby.

#32: Merry Christmas

Diego: You’re the reason Santa started the Naughty List.

Klaus: *blinks*

Klaus: *pouts*

Klaus: No fair! He told me last week I was on the Nice List!

Diego: What? Klaus? What does that -

Diego: OH MY GOD KLAUS IS SANTA DEAD???!!!!

#33: I’ll Keep You Safe, Honey.

Diego: I lost my teddy bear. Will you sleep with me instead?

Klaus: *pulls out a stuffed tiger*

Klaus: He got lost in the kitchen. Don’t worry, I rescued him for you.

Diego: *takes soft tiger*

Diego: *voice cracks* Oh. Thanks.

Klaus: *kisses his forehead* You’re welcome, baby.

#34: Excuse Me?

Diego: The only thing your eyes haven’t told me is your name.

Klaus, internally: Shit. What if he finds out I stole like five of his knives and all of the cookies last week?

Klaus, externally: *blinks*

Klaus: Um… Stefonopolis?

#35: I Am Not Apologizing For This One

Diego: If you were a steak, you’d be well done.

Klaus: But I’m so unique…

Klaus: I talk to the dead, Diego.

Diego: Okay…?

Klaus: *smirks*

Klaus: So wouldn’t I be medium rare?

Ben: Ooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

#36: Leonardo Da Vinci Was Arrested Multiple Times For Homosexual Activity.

Diego: Is this a museum? Cause you’re a work of art.

Klaus: *dancing to the soundtrack of High School Musical 3* Actually Five took me back to Italy once. Leonardo da Vinci and I had some fun.

Diego:

Diego: Oh my god. Seriously?

Diego: *looks up picture of Mona Lisa, now titled Mona Klausa*

Diego: How the fuck -

#37: Why Would You Say That Though

Diego: Am I sleepwalking? Cause I’ve only seen you in my dreams.

Klaus: *sitting on the counter and eating a donut in one bite* Are they dirty?

Luther: *chokes on a pickle*

Diego: Oh my god no -

Diego: Well sometimes -

Diego: I mean no of course not -

Luther: *praying to whoever’s up there to just kill him already*

#38: Be Safe Kids!

Diego: Can you hold this for me?

Klaus: Sweetie, you need to wash your hands.

#39: Apocalypse Averted!

Diego: If looks could kill, you’d be a weapon of mass destruction.

Klaus: *blinks*

Klaus: I thought that was Vanya.

Diego:

Diego, panicking: Holy shit Klaus you can’t just say things like that -

Vanya: *crying from laughter*

#40: Attractive

Diego: Do you swallow magnets? Because you’re -

Klaus: *shoves him up against the wall*

Klaus: How did you find out? Who told you? Was it Ben? I swear to god I’ll kill him -

Diego: *squeaks* What?

#41: First You’ve Gotta Propose Diego

Diego: Wouldn’t we look cute on a wedding cake together?

Klaus: Diego. Did you buy me a cake?

Diego:

Klaus:

Diego:

Klaus: I’m waiting.

Diego: Right sir yes sir right away sir -

#42: He May Not Be A Kitten But He Is As Soft As One

Diego: If I followed you home, would you keep me?

Klaus: I’m homeless, Diego.

Diego: What? You are? Oh no, baby - you can come stay with me?

Klaus: *looks up from Disney Princess coloring book and raises an eyebrow* Is your bed available?

Diego, blushing: Ye-yeah, b-ba-baby. Whe-whenever you-u w-want.

Klaus: *smiles*

Klaus: *takes Diego’s hand*

Klaus: Okay.

Diego: *dies a little bit inside (in a good way)*

#43: It’s Just You.

Diego: Is it hot in here or is it just you?

Klaus, blushing: I -

Five: DIEGO. THE HOUSE IS ON FIRE. NOW IS NOT THE TIME.

#44: ‘Scuse Me, Mate?

Diego: You know, penguins mate for life. Wanna be my penguin?

Klaus: Eh. I’ve always been more of an iguana man.

Diego:

Diego:

Diego:

Diego: What?

#45: You Look Like… Antonio Banderas With The Long Hair.

Diego: How’s the most beautiful person in the world doing today?

Klaus: *buried in a Vogue magazine* I don’t know I’m not Antonio Banderas.

#46: What The Fuck Klaus

Diego: Do you have a map? I keep getting lost in your eyes.

Klaus: *hands him a Candyland board* Here. I stole it from Pogo.

#47: You Dumbass

Diego: I hate my last name. Can I borrow yours?

Klaus:

Klaus:

Klaus:

Klaus: We have the same last name, Diego.

Diego: *blinks*

Diego: Fuck you’re right -

#48: Okay But Diego Would Make A Great Aladdin Though

Diego: I’m not a genie, but I can still make your dreams come true.

Klaus: *wrinkles his nose*

Klaus: You can get me a pink elephant with jaundice?

Diego: *blinks*

Diego: What the fuck Klaus -

#49: HELLO

Diego: Is that a knife or are you just happy to see me?

Klaus: I don’t just have random knives on me Diego, I’m not you.

Diego: So you are happy to see me?

Klaus: I mean you just interrupted a very riveting episode of Sesame Street, so… we’ll see.

#50: It’s Always Best To Start With The Truth.

Diego: I love you.

Klaus: *beams* That’s all you had to say, darling.

[misssophiachase]

Happy belated International Firefighters’ Day, everyone! Thank you also to the gorgeous and lovely @diaz-eddie​ who introduced me to the awesomeness that is 911, Eddie Diaz, Christopher and Buddie. So this one is for you, my dear. 

Professional photographer Caroline Forbes and firefighter Klaus Mikaelson keep running into each other. It’s either the universe playing a joke on them or Katherine’s ‘accidental’ matchmaking. Or maybe it's a bit of both? 

Smoke Signals

“You, you must have been looking for me...sending smoke signals" 

Round 1 - Ocean Beach, Sunday 7:53pm

“Now, we each have to cut off a lock of hair and throw it into the fire.”

“Excuse me? I know there’s been a few tequila shots consumed already but we have to do what now?”

Caroline knew from experience that any Katherine Pierce idea was most probably a really bad one. Tonight was case in point.

She’d been best friends with her since first grade when Kat hit Liam McKenzie for taking Caroline’s turn on the slippery slide. So, she was pretty much indebted to her from the outset. They were also currently roommates and business partners so Caroline figured she had the requisite knowledge to call this latest idea one of her very worst.

Kat’s latest distraction, a rather buff looking Mason Lockwood, had decided to leave town to pursue a career in Las Vegas. Given those barely clothed, impressive attributes she’d stumbled upon in the kitchen at breakfast she figured stripping was most probably that vocational change.

Katherine insisted they were just having casual fun, and she didn’t doubt it given the excess noise emanating from her bedroom, but she decided that any break-up needed to be acknowledged hence their impromptu visit to the beach on a cool November evening. 

Katherine decided she needed to sacrifice some things to cleanse herself before moving on to the next possibly half-dressed guy, hence the fire.

“I am not sacrificing my perfectly good hair for Magic Mike.”

“What have I told you about calling him that?”

“Sorry, too soon. Although, I thought after burning his best, gold g-string we were done, Kitty Kat.”

“We have the worst luck with guys, Care, we need to completely purge ourselves and start over. So, what better way than burning something meaningful as a way to do that.”

Caroline realised she really should have confiscated the tequila much earlier.

She also wasn’t too sure what she was starting over from given she lived like a nun compared to her roommate. When Caroline was out, she was either on location taking photographs or busily developing them in her dark room. It had been her passion since she was twelve and nothing made her feel more at peace than capturing those beautiful but brief moments in time.

It also didn’t hurt that she was one of the most sought after photographers in the Bay area and had her own studio and gallery on Bartlett Street along with her partner and public relations expert Katherine whose vision and services complemented the business.

“Well, as much as I appreciate the concept, I think there are probably many other things we could do to purge ourselves of bad choices.”

“Like?”

“I don’t know, maybe not make them again? And by that I mean you.”

“Cute,” Kat growled. “We didn’t come all this way to the beach to make false promises, we need to burn something as a memento. I read somewhere that...”

“Okay, crazy, arsonist lady. I have no intention of sacrificing anything, especially my hair or this Victoria Secret, lace, push-up bra I nabbed on sale last week.”

“Well, that’s probably a good thing given this is an illegal bonfire and the fine would probably dwarf the cost of it.”

The interruption was unexpected and she was immediately hostile, even if that crisp accent was kind of annoyingly attractive. Caroline turned around, not expecting the voice to match the, uh, body. She decided to blame it on the fact she was otherwise distracted by the fluorescent, yellow, stripes on his jacket that could never be considered attractive. Ever.

Unfortunately, he still was just that; the glowing flames from the fire highlighting a pair of amused, crimson lips, the perfect amount of well-placed stubble and was that a stray dimple she spied?

Even so, this guy had a nerve interrupting them.

“Should I be worried you know how much my underwear costs?” Probably not the most important issue right now but it was the first thing that came to mind as he produced an official looking notepad.

“It probably wouldn’t be professional to respond to that particular question,” he replied, eyes cast downward as he wrote on his pad dutifully. The dimple she wasn’t completely sure existed made an unexpected but brief reappearance.

Read the rest on AO3 HERE

[writingwhywhywhy]

Gauche Chapter 2

What were you doing here? Went home with a stranger from a bar. Trying to stop your wedding. What the hell was the guy’s name again. What was it? “I am visiting my friend Elijah.” You lied

Jackson gave you a look that told you he knew the story was far from the truth. “That’s funny.”

“Why is that?” You asked.

“His buddy Marcel was the main reason the werewolves were forced to live in the Bayou.” 

There was just a string of curses in your mind. You were out of your element and damn he looked so attractive when he was mad. You were beyond out of luck. Meeting Elijah last night was definitely bad luck. You were hoping your panic had not flashed across your face. You needed to be on his good side to stop the wedding. What could you do to roll that back?

“Y/N was not aware of my association with Marcel. I am sure if she had known, she would have asked me to take up your case. Or at least she would have been upset with me.” Elijah said, saving you as he descended stairs. 

“So when did this friendship start?” Jackson asked.

Damn he was seeing through you as he always had. “Shortly after I moved.” You said.

“So a vampire and a werewolf who do not live in the same city became friends?” 

Another series of curse words crossed your mind. Why did you have to open your mouth? The story had so many holes, swiss cheese was jealous. “Yes. I doubt that you understand, but not everyone reacts as negatively to my presence as you do.” Elijah challenged.

“I can take a wild guess that my ex should have. Y/N used to have good taste, but I guess she left that in New Orleans with me.” Jackson said, glaring at you.

At this point you had wanted to come clean but he had just taken a jab at your choice to leave him. It was still a sore spot for the two of you. You knew that leaving was the only way he would understand there was a world outside of New Orleans. “I guess I took your manners with me.”

“Well, have you at least called Mary to let her know you are here.” Jackson said, hoping to cause a feeling of guilt.

“She knew before I got on the plane. Would you like to call her or would you prefer that I do? I was her favorite daughter.” You glared at him.

Jackson turned from you. It was one of the few times in your life Jackson had ever turned his back on you. The last time was when you were leaving him. “Hayley said she left something here before she went to the bayou, and that you or Klaus would have it.” 

“She called.” Elijah handed Jackson a charging cable, and walked past him.

Looking at the cable, the need for it was a lie. If something like that was a necessity, she could have gotten it at any store. You would bet anything that Hayley had wanted an excuse to come here, and you knew she was in love with Elijah. You dismissed that trail as Elijah sat next to you. “You know you could stay here instead of the hotel.” 

Well, if Jackson was going to turn from you, you could ignore him. “I would be putting you out.”

You could sense the fact Jackson was fuming. “You would never put me out. I would be troubling you by asking you to stay in the same home as Klaus.” Elijah said, also ignoring Jackson who was radiating heat.

“Klaus I can handle. Are you sure it would be no trouble?” 

“What else are friends for?” Elijah gave you a small smile.

“Okay. I need a ride to pick up my stuff from the hotel.” You faked a little laugh.

“Let’s go grab your stuff.” Elijah said, patting your upper leg and getting up.

You followed him. Jackson was directly in your path. “Oh Jackson, you’re still here. I thought you had left. After all, Hayley needs her important item asap.” The innocence in your voice was one lie that Jackson did not see through.

As he left, Jackson looked like he could turn several shades of red. You and Elijah continued to his car. “I guess we are trying to stop the same wedding.” You said once you got into the car.

“We are. You might have to actually stay with me to sell this to Jackson. I am sorry about that.”

“It will give us more time to plan.” 

“My brother is counting on this wedding to go seamlessly. We would need to avoid him while we plan.”

“Jackson’s grandmother is against it.” 

“Well this will be fun.” Chapter 1 Tagging @remembered-license​ and @akshi8278​

[guren-no-shishio]

Hello, what do you think of this chapter ? What for the next ?

I feel so bad, I have like 4 chapters here to catch up on before the one comes out! Just been a bit of a weird month for me D:

First off, 282!! We finally get to see Asta’s Union Mode form, I like it... but at the same time I was a little disappointed? I am not quite sure why...

I really did enjoy seeing everyones thoughts on Asta, they are aware he’s possessed by a Devil, but they have faith in him and cheer him on (mostly Klaus here, but still xD) Though it was really cool to see how much Asta has progressed since the beginning - he really took that Ancient Demon down fast. 

I am not going to lie when I say I got very worried and sad about this panel, Gimodelo is genuinely worried for Nacht and it was at this point I was beginning to question Nacht’s relationship with his Devils - there seems to be some sort of connection there, we do know Nacht completely dominated the four of them in regards to the Binding, so I am curious on the way these Devils feel about Nacht. 

283

Gotta say Fuego was on fire this chapter, I really appreciated the amazing panels of him and Salamander flying around, burning every enemy in sight 🔥 But it was really hard to watch that he couldn’t really do much against the Devils, someone so powerful - yet could only do so much against the current enemy... What’s bothering me though is what can Fuego do here? We haven’t seen him use anything like mana-zone or such, is Spirit Dive even a possibility for him? I really wanna know here. 

This chapter was definitely hype though, with the Bulls collecting Asta in preparation to go and save their dear Captain - then ending off with Gaja’s amazing attack, Heart and the Elves arriving to help out! I am honestly excited to see what Patri will do this arc, seeing Gaja fight for real as well! 

*side note, I absolutely love that Tabata gave Maxa snow magic in reference to Snow Man

284

Good to see that their training was convenient enough for them here. 

Honestly this page here was really nice too, I am kinda laughing at Charmy though lol

I really like that we got a new race introduced too, at first glance I thought it was the Earth spirit - but I am glad that we have to wait a bit longer for that one to make an appearance. 

Good to see we got an explanation on the magic and such too.

Luck’s form is really cool, it really does just go through and destroy those Devils - god damn.

I wonder who else can use Ultimate magic now... I am hoping for Noelle and Gaja to get some action here most of all - but Leopold would be cool as well, especially in front of his siblings this time :D

Tabata really likes to just impale characters doesn’t he? Nacht was gonna be fine, no doubt - I can’t believe people were saying he was dead or dying...

285

This chapter was really enjoyable! 

Happy to see that we got a flashback to the fight with Nacht - I am glad to see Jack just didn’t leave him to die lol. Jack getting back up despite his condition was nice too, Nacht having some sort of faith in him is also good here. 

Walgner! The final name and form we had to see for Nacht and his little Devil buddies! This one was interesting to me, I really like the design for this one - probably in order it’d be Canis, Gallus, Felis and Equus out of personal preference :D

The Echo characteristic seems really cool as well, stunning the devils with some sort of screech and taking them out and putting them into a church lmao

Nacht switching between all the forms to fight was fun to watch - but still makes me wish he didn’t have to leave Gimodelo behind... He’d definitely be a help here or even back with Dante, such a shame really.

WE FINALLY GOT MORGEN INTRODUCED!! We knew since a while that there was a brother, maybe even a twin. I am in love with the names here, ngl. 

I saw this and got sad at first, in my mind it was like “damn, Nacht looked so genuinely happy back then” but turns out it’s his brother instead! Nacht looks like such a delinquent it’s absolutely hilarious - especially when you go back to when he insulted the Black Bulls, what a hypocrite 😂

Questionable looks/fashion choice aside, I find Nacht even more interesting with the beginning of this flashback - which I didn’t think was possible! Nacht’s definitely shot up to the top of my list, absolutely in love with how Tabata has handled his character thus far! Keep up the good work!!!

I do have a lot to say for the next chapter, but I will leave that for another post :D

[thewatermelloncat]

A Light Supper

Summary: Written for this prompt from Anonymous:

…Five tries to hide the fact that he’s coming down with a cold from his siblings, so they all end up going to the dinner with Reginald. Five’s trying to remain calm and hold back his sneezes but once everyone else starts messing things up and leaving, Five leaves with them and they all realize he’s sick and was hiding it from them the whole time.

Warnings: None

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

“You’re wr…wrong” Diego’s stuttered words shatter what little remains of the spirit of the siblings around the table. They’d all agreed to go to the dinner with the expectation that their father would play mind games on them, but somehow, they ended up hoping that this version of their father would be different.

Still, Diego was stupid to bring up the matter of the President when Five had warned him against it. As if his literal headache isn’t enough, his own siblings are making it worse.

“Look, forget about the president. We have a catastrophic war coming in five days” Five attempts to save the conversation. “We need to figure out how to stop it.”

“War?” their father turns to him. “Men will always be at war with each other.”

“No, this isn’t just some war” Five hopes his voice will remain steady. If it doesn’t and it cracks, he can blame it on exasperation. “I’m talking about a doomsday. The end of the world.”

“Well… you’re the special ones, aren’t you? Why don’t you band together and do something about it?” Reginald tells them, his entire demeanour making it seem like they weren’t smart enough to have thought of his suggestion in the first place.

Five opens his mouth to reiterate his point when Klaus suddenly chokes out a gasp as his arms flail in the air. For a few seconds there is confused silence before Allison speaks up.

“Is he having a seizer?”

“Overdosing probably” Diego mumbles, sounding both unconcerned and uninterested.

As the flailing continues, a sharp tingling sensation strikes Five hard in the back of the nose and he brings his fist up to rub against it. He can’t sneeze in front of their father and risk embarrassment, not now. Holding his breath for a second, he distantly hears Luther ask whether they should do something.

He’s glad the distraction has taken all eyes off of him as he struggles to keep his composure, but he doesn’t have time for it.

“Klaus! Now is not the time” Five whispers harshly, his fist still pressed under his nose to keep from sneezing. His voice sounding strained. “What are you doing?”

“I’m” Klaus seems to choke out the word, the rest of the sentence still stuck in his throat.

“Out with it, boy” Reginald commands.

“Ben!” Klaus manages to finish his sentence before falling to the floor.

No one has any time to contemplate the meaning of the statement before their father stands abruptly. “Well… thank you for coming. I’ve seen about enough.”

Five huffs out a sigh of both defeat and the need to sneeze finally leaving him. Drawing in another breath he aims to stop his father from leaving but Luther interrupts him.

“No, I” he breaks off, slamming his fists onto the table as he stands up. Then he exceeds all expectation of stupidity and rips his shirt open. “Look at what you did to me. Look at it!”

“Oh, shit. Why?” Five huffs softly, leaning back in his chair defeated.

All hopes of saving the conversation vanish as their father steps over Klaus’ form lying on the floor and disappears behind the doors of the elevator.

Five’s sigh of despair sounds halfway between a cough and a sob as he leans forward to rest his head in his hands, his face twisting in frustration. He stays like that unmoving as Allison calls out for the check and his siblings murmur to each other around the table. It isn’t until he feels eyes being drawn to him that he sits up and slams his fists against the table.

“I should have come on my own.”

“Wait. Where’s this coming from?” Luther asks. 

“You’re all incapable of making a good first impression” Five runs his hand down his face, feigning a display of frustration while really being a cover for rubbing his nose as he needs to sneeze again. 

“Come on, Five. We get you’re frustrated but we all know that dad’s not an easy person to impress” Allison mediates. 

“He also didn’t seem like he was going to help us anyway” Luther points out. 

“We might have got him to if you’d been able to keep your shirt on” Five sniffs. 

“Hey we can’t pin this all on Luther. We’re team Zero” Diego defends him. 

Five isn’t even going to comment on the questionable branding. “All right, I won’t” he accepts, taking a deep breath before continuing. “I told you not to mention the president” he looks at Diego who stares back at him blankly. “You made Diego punch himself in the face, and you exploded fruit everywhere” he turns to Allison then Vanya, whose expressions both shift to guilt. “And you did whatever the hell that was” he glares at Klaus as he finally picks himself up from the floor.

“Look Five, we’re sorry. All right?” Luther apologises. 

“You know, this time sorry just really isn’t enough” Five can feel himself shaking and his voice sounds muted with defeat. 

“I’m sure there’ll be another way” Vanya encourages. 

“There is” Five bites back. “But it isn’t an option I want to take.” At the end of the sentence Five’s breath catches and he quickly covers a couple of coughs behind a fist. 

“Well, don’t get so worked up you choke” Klaus jokes before being silenced by Five’s glare. 

Luckily no one else comments on his slip in composure and Vanya directs the conversation away from it. 

“We’ll find another way if it’s not something you want to do. Or we can help you with it.”

Fives sets his jaw and holds off on explaining, he can’t be bothered getting into it now. So, instead he shakes his head, “let’s just go.”

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

The elevator descends at a painfully slow rate.

No one had complained at Five’s suggestion to leave, not wanting to stay in the place any longer than he did. They’d all packed themselves into the small space in a tight squeeze but Five was happy where he was, wedged in the back corner where the joining walls could hold him up.

Dinner – or what failed to be it – took its toll on him both emotionally and physically. He hadn’t expected it to go smoothly by any means given his luck but it had gone worse than he could have imagined. Now he had no choice but to make a deal that he didn’t want to do.

In amidst of thinking deeply he isn’t aware of coughs bubbling in his chest until it is too late and he quickly throws an arm up to cover them.

Immediately all eyes are drawn his way and there is an awkward shuffle of bumping shoulders to try and get a better look at him. Though there is nothing he can do while he struggles for breath. After he’d caught it back, he sighs and lowers his arm, saying nothing.

“You not feeling so hot?” Klaus looks up at him from where he slouches on the floor. His moping for himself disappears as his expression morphs into that of concern.

Five stays silent, knowing that not answering will be answer enough. There is no point in denying it, he’d only be digging himself a grave. It was a good run while it lasted.

“Why didn’t you tell us you were getting sick?” Allison asks, her posture deflating at the realisation that she’d missed it.

“Isn’t important. Not a priority” Five murmurs slowly. Small spaces had never bothered him but the confined space and many eyes upon him make him shift uncomfortably, feeling claustrophobic.

“If you’d told us we could have talked to dad while you stayed back and rested” Luther tells him.

Five scoffs and rolls his eyes. He was about to explain in how many ways that would have been stupid given the display they had all made in front of their father but the elevator doors open and Vanya’s voice cuts him off.

“There’s a couch over there” she says directing them to a seating arrangement over by the balcony.

Wordlessly Five lets Allison take him by the shoulders and lead him over the couch, the rest of the siblings following behind them.

As soon as Five sits down Allison is stopped in front of him reaching her hand out to his forehead. Though before she can get a proper measure Five moves her hand away.

“Five” she protests sharply.

“Just… g-give me a second” he ignores her complaint with his breath hitching.

“I’ktcch, I’ketchu… Ih’ketshuu” he sniffles wetly after directing the series of sneezes he had been holding back throughout the meeting into his elbow.

“You’re not too warm” Allison tells him, withdrawing her hand from his forehead where she had repositioned it after Five had lowered his arm. “Does anyone have anything that can be used as a tissue?” she asks after hearing Five continue to sniffle.

“Uh, yeah” Luther draws out as he fishes through his jacket pocket. Pulling out a handkerchief that would normally be used to wipe blood off his hands if things got rough throwing someone out of the bar.

Allison smiles at him as he hands it to her, then she hands it down Five who mumbles out a tired “thanks” before blowing his nose.

“Why didn’t you say anything? We wouldn’t have thought any less of you” Allison says.

“That’s not what I’m worried about” Five dismisses looking up at her. “The world ends again in five days and none of us have time for this.”

“Five, you’re not going to be able to keep going if you don’t rest” Luther points out.

“There’s no time for me to rest.”

“You have to find time, buddy. You’re no use to us if you crash” Diego tells him.

“I have to figure out how to get us back. It’s my fault that we’re stuck here.”

“That’s the thing” Klaus speaks up. “We’re all here together, aren’t we? We can help you figure it out.”

“Just one day, Five” Allison begs.

“One day” Five chuckles sardonically.

“That’s all we’re asking, Five” Vanya says, stepping closer to him. “Take one day off and I promise you you’ll feel better.”

Though incredibly stubborn, at Vanya’s words spoken in a motherly tone, Five’s thoughts set on refusal pause for a second. It’s easy to see why caregiving comes naturally to her. She also makes a good point. If Five takes a day to recover he can get back to it and work more efficiently, and he can no longer ignore the part of him that has been screaming for rest for days on end.

His siblings seem to sense his compliance as his shoulders drop in defeat.

“We’ll still be trying to figure things out. It’s not like no one will be doing anything” Vanya promises.

Five nods in acceptance before raising the handkerchief back to his nose. “Hiht’cht, hih’isshh.”

Allison sighs sympathetically, placing her hand on his shoulder. “Come on, let’s get you to bed.”

[emcon-imagines]

“DIEGO SLOWLY FALLING FOR YOU, A BOXER THAT TRAINS AT HIS GYM, BUT YOU BEING OBLIVIOUS TO IT (THE UMBRELLA ACADEMY)”

gif // requester: anon ​​// request here

Diego noticed you the first time you were both at the gym at the safe time

He literally couldn’t take his eyes off you and it was a major distraction

For a while he kept trying to mix up the times he went to the gym because he didn’t want to run into you

Mans can’t handle his emotions

But he had shit luck and it seemed like you were always there

It was actually you who made the first move, asking if he wanted to train with you

You two ended up as gym buddies

Diego being like “ok, this is happening, play it cool”

Every time his phone buzzed with a text from you, it was like a shot of adrenaline to the system

He even walks home with you after

Even though you assure him that you can protect yourself. But he’s still worried.

Boxing together so that you can prove to him that you’re good and don’t need his help

But then inviting him to walk home with you anyways because “what if one of us slips on ice? It’s cold out.”

Mostly because you like his companionship and also yes you’re in love with him and no you don’t think he likes you back

The entire time Diego is like “how... how do they not know?!” 

And also “so does y/n have feelings for me or...”

He had been flirting with you since the very beginning but you had been completely oblivious to it

Him facepalming a lot behind the scenes

And Klaus teases him about it constantly, how Diego is “pouring his heart out” and you’re just like “yeah Diego is cool”

But let’s be honest, Diego “pouring his heart” out doesn’t seem like much if you don’t know him well

Him finally asking you if you wanted to get dinner, deciding that he wanted to make his  intentions clear

It all clicks together and he finds out you felt the same way but didn’t want to assume anything asksnjdjdj

God two dumbasses in love we love to see it

[nobody-wants-ice-cream]

Everything Wrong With The Umbrella Academy. Episode 5, Number Five.

We Only See Each Other at Weddings and Funerals

Run Boy Run

Extra Ordinary

Man on the Moon

Disclaimer: This is all in good fun! I wanted to do a really nitpicky re-watch of the series and found some really cool and interesting things I didn’t notice before. This is meant to have a Cinema Sins-esque tone. However, I did take off a lot more sins than Cinema Sins would have because I do genuinely like the series and the people that made it possible. So all of the good things got one sin off and all the bad things got one sin added. This is a really long post, so grab some popcorn. If there’s anything that I missed, feel free to add it!

I would also like to add that normally you wouldn’t watch a show this way. I am purposefully looking for mistakes, easter eggs, and other things that we’re not supposed to notice. I am watching not with the goal of entertainment, but for analysis. So most of the things that I sin, I am seeing for the first time. 

Number Five

The apocalypse looks incredible. Well done special effects team! I know I already shouted them out, but they deserve another one. Or two. -2

Five shades Dolores with an umbrella. What a considerate dude. -1

Heat of the Moment is an awesome song. -1

Five’s survival gear. Well done costume department. -2

Also, the progression of skill and age is really well done. -1

Dolores’s little santa hat. -1

And her sunglasses. -1

“Do you remember that little mansion just outside city limits where we-- yeah” Noodle incident. However, the way Five says this implies that I really, really don’t wanna know. +1

Argyle Public Library. Suddenly the reason why Five went there makes sense. -1

How did Five get all the way up there on the library walls? Did he use a ladder? If so, that was begging for him to fall and break his name. +1

Sean Sullivan (who plays Old Man Five) does an excellent job imitating Aidan Gallagher’s vocal patterns and movements. -1

The Handler is the first person Five sees after 45 years of isolation. +1

Title screen lunch box! -1

Also, Five kept a lunch box to remind him of his family. He had Vanya’s book but nothing else with their images on it. I’m sad now, but glad that Five at least had something. -1

Five is so hungover. +1

Luther looks like he’s about to cry when Five tells him about finding their dead bodies. My boy! +1

Tom Hopper is an excellent actor. -1

Five also looks like he’s about to cry. +1

Aidan Gallagher is an excellent actor. -1

Luther lifts up Diego and holds him like Diego is an angry toddler. This amuses me. -1

See! I told you. Diego figured out that Five was involved with the shootings at Griddys and Gimbel Brothers on Patch’s doorstep! -1

“They work for my former employer. A woman called The Handler.” No one in this show is allowed to have a reasonable name. +1

Underneath how callous Five is about Patch’s death, he shows genuine concern for Diego. -1

Diego has not slept at all. And he is planning to go after Hazel and Cha Cha. Good luck with that, buddy. +1

Luther finally gets tired of Five vagueing everybody. Good job, I’m curious too. Er, I was when this was my first time watching it. -1

The Handler decides to wear three inch red pumps to the apocalypse. +1

The Handler is as vague as a Multi Level Marketing schemer would be.+1

The Commission decides to wait 45 years to recruit Five instead of a more reasonable number. Like zero years. Honestly, if I was the Handler, I would have picked up Five as a young, impressionable thirteen year old. Then he would feel indebted to the Commission and wouldn’t have had time to come up with the equations to escape. The Commission has no logical reasoning skill. +1

“You’re saying that I could actually leave here? Go...go back?” Heartbreaking. Sean Sullivan gets another sin off. -1

“All of this, was supposed to happen”. Kate Walsh is a kick ass actress. -1

The Commission is composed of dicks. +1

Five asks Dolores for permission before running off to join The Commission. -1

Five’s mustache. +1

I would watch a spin off of Five’s time in the Commission. Hopefully season 2 explores this more. Dallas plot, here we come? Sin until we get some answers. +1

You can see Five’s epiphany in his eyes. His expression says “I’ve got it! I’ve got it!” -1

The words on Vanya’s book look real. The props department did not have to go that hard. -2

However, whatever notes Five wrote are indecipherable. And for good reason if he was attempting to fool an entire time commission. -1

The fire extinguisher Klaus throws confirms for Five that the portal works. -1

Also, Five is clutching Vanya’s book. It’s like he’s nervous to see them again after so much time. -1

The fall from the portal to the ground doesn’t break, scratch, or hurt Five at all. +1

Also, Dallas plot foreshadowing? Remains a sin until we have answers. +1

I hope that they show Five picking up his hat, radio, gun, and possibly the fire extinguisher and that is why we never found any of those in a grassy knoll. Season 2 better resolve this. +1

“But that’s murder”. Luther, you threw people out of buildings when you were twelve years old. That is also murder. +1

Aidan Gallagher kills the delivery in this scene. Well done. -1

Klaus still has Dave’s blood on his hands. Also, putting Klaus through even more trauma. +1

Robert Sheehan and the heartbroken thousand yard stare. -1

The music choice really works. -1

That emotional, awful scream. -1

The briefcase exploding may foreshadow Klaus’s comic powers. Sin until we get answers. +1

Hazel and Cha Cha casually murdered Claudia. +1

“Unauthorized round trip travel to 1968”. This is how we found out where Klaus went. It requires a bit more brain power to figure out the Vietnam war from here, however, I think that this was a clever way to do it. It brings us back to the reason Klaus ended up there. -1

Honestly, Hazel was right to not carry the briefcase on him. If Five had seen it at Gimbel Brothers then he would have taken it because he knows what it is. It would be an insurance policy or could be used as leverage. Either way, Hazel and Cha Cha were going to lose their briefcase. +1

Allison, you were there when Vanya made breakfast plans with Leonard. Is the coffee and bombolini your way of trying to distract Vanya? Because based on the makeup and the nice scarf, it isn’t likely that you will be successful. +1

Vanya has a framed piece of sheet music. Either that’s some really valuable manuscript or its something kitschy. Either way, it’s a sin. +1

“What are you concerned about?” Vanya, the red flags are everywhere. +1

“Like a woman who’s based her whole life on rumors.” Ouch. Allison is trying to give you genuine advice, Vanya. This was uncalled for.  +1

Leonard is getting progressively creepier. +1

“Can you imagine sharing your birthday with six world-famous assholes who all know they’re better than you?” Choke on that irony. +1

Leonard doesn’t stop her by saying, “Wait, that’s salt!” he waits until she already put salt in it.  Dick. +1

“What happened to the other girl?” Harold, you know damn well. +1

Good use of Beethoven. -1

Klaus is back in the bath. Bookends to his tourture. +1

Klaus is haunted by memories of Vietnam this time instead of just ghosts in general. Trauma. +1

I made eye contact with Aidan Gallagher again. +1

Klaus doesn’t want to talk about Vietnam with Five because the last time he tried to connect, Five jumped away. +1

Five looks really excited to connect about time travel with somebody in his family. -1

Five doesn’t care that Klaus was tortured by Hazel and Cha Cha. +1

Five, Klaus has been tortured and then was in some war (Five wouldn’t know yet) for almost a year. This proves that Five’s decision making is impared. Presumably by his hangover. +1

Diego takes out his dagger from episode 1’s bank robbery. This is significant because of something Patch said. That Diego runs around as a vigilante to prove that what he did with the Umbrella Academy had meaning. Now that that has gotten Patch killed indirectly, he feels upset and confused. The dagger that he used as a child is now a symbol of what he did to Patch. -1

The fridging of Detective Patch. Yes, I’m still pissed about it and will continue to be pissed about it. +2

At this point, Klaus doesn’t know about Mom’s “death”. And I don’t think Five does either. The Umbrella Academy of Not Talking To Each Other should be the school’s full name. +1

Allison and Cha Cha don’t see each other when getting into or out of the chairs right across from one another. +1

Allison is doing the equivalent of social media stalking her sister’s boyfriend. Smart. -1

Extra Ordinary bites everyone in the ass. Thanks, Vanya. +1

Five and Allison have the same slow, blocky handwriting. Did Reggie teach them to write as slowly and as large as possible? +1

Hazel and Agnes’s flirting. It’s cute? -1

Klaus ran down the stairs wearing Grace’s heels and broke his jaw when they were twelve. Trauma. +1

Diego can’t park for shit either. Diego and Five need to learn how to park vehicles. +1

Klaus’s little “Hey, Dave” when he sees Dave’s picture. -1

The show fakes out the vet confronting Klaus. Clever. -1

Diego is genuinely concerned for Klaus. -1

The vet is itching for a fight. Asking a drunk person to apologize? Dumbass. +1

“I’d like to apologize...that you are depriving some village of their IDIOT!” -1

Klaus and Diego get into a bar fight in less than five minutes. Checks out. -1

Agnes sees the birds the way Hazel sees normal people. I like the analogy. -1

Agnes does not own Griddys. Who does? Is she the manager or something? +1

Hazel and Agnes theme. -1

Diego’s face when Klaus says he lost the only person he ever loved more than himself. He’s thinking, “Klaus lost his Eudora”. -1

No way in hell Five would have been able to get up as high as the chalk goes. +1

Five is still using Vanya’s book as a notebook. Checks out. -1

The rifle Five pulls out looks a lot like the one he points at the Handler. It doesn’t look like the one he pointed at Kennedy. Why would Five lie about this? +1

Luther, you murdered people when you were twelve. +1

Luther dangles Dolores out the window by her neck. Logical, yeah. Fucked, also yeah. +1

The level of concern Five has for Dolores. -1

Also, well done creating tension, show. My heart was beating like crazy. -1

The Gigue from Partita No. 2 in D Minor by Bach is one of my favorite pieces.  -1

No one stops playing like that. +1

Allison takes her not-stalking info to Vanya and presents it really accusingly. At this point, Vanya is sick of your shit, Allison. +1

“You’re trying to dig up dirt on a guy that I like, who does that?” Everyone with an internet connection does this for the people they care about. What Allison did was hella extra though. +1

Vanya is getting more assertive. -1

Vanya is a dick to Allison. +1

“They’re a real frickin’ mess”. Understatement of the century. +1

Cha Cha wouldn’t know about the moon mission because Vanya’s book came out before it. Also, Vanya wouldn’t know that Five could time travel. +1

Diego you haven’t slept at all, as soon as you drop you’re gonna sleep like a baby. +1

The motel clerk doesn’t notice Cha Cha’s pistol, which was directly in his line of sight. +1

Diego doesn’t notice Klaus’s footsteps. +1

“Yeah but you also told me that licking a nine-volt battery would give me pubes” “We were eight”. Sibling culture. -1

Klaus saves Diego from gunfire the best he can. Even though Diego still gets shot, sin off for Klaus’s heroics. -1

“Was this all part of your master plan” “Shut up”. Sibling culture. -1

Audition panels are always dicks. +1

If you start an audition the way Vanya just did with the shaky bow contact, you’re fucked. +1

Imogen is a great violinist. Ellen Page is not. It’s really easy to see when they switch out. +1

Allison goes to Leonard’s place with no backup. Come on, even Diego has backup! +1

Allison doesn’t tell Five and Diego about how she got into Leonard’s house when they were breaking in again later. The window would have been much better than breaking the door. +1

Vanya’s powers are distorting her music. It sounds like her intonation is gone. Yet the conductor looks impressed. +1

Allison almost finds Helen Cho’s body. +1

The camera cuts to the attic entrance to show that it will be significant later on. -1

The Hargreeves car has HERMES on its licence plate. A.) nice comics reference. B.) Hermes is the God of Travelers. C.) Of course Reggie has a vanity licence plate. -3

Five and Luther connecting over their forced isolation. -1

Also, Aidan Gallagher and Tom Hopper play off each other really well. -1

“I’ve lived a long life, but you’re still a young man. You got your whole life ahead of you. Don’t waste it.” Luther’s face amuses me. -1

Five threatening while Hazel and Cha Cha doesn’t look ridiculous. I genuinely belive it. Props to Aidan Gallagher. -1

Five and Luther look so confused by Klaus and Diego arriving in an ice cream truck. This is such an underrated scene. -3

Ride of the Valkyries -1

Klaus’s little wave. -1

“Whee” I love Ben. -2

I want to know how they shot this. The behind the scenes after the Handler showed up and stopped time must have been strange to look at. -1

Luther protects Five with his whole body without question. -1

Five puts his hands in his pockets but then they’re behind his back in the next shot with no motion to explain it. +1

The Handler is a creep. She’s into Five. +5

Where and When did Five get that pistol? +1

So many memes come from this scene. -2

Five doesn’t have his finger anywhere near the trigger in some shots, but in others it’s two seconds from shooting the Handler. What’s up with that? +1

The Handler is so, so creepy. The hand caressing Five’s cheek? Eww. That all but confirms that she wants to be his Mrs. Robinson. +5

Kate Walsh plays an excellent villain. -1

Five made a deal with the devil because it was his only option. -1

[Gerard Way and Ray Toro’s “Happy Together” playing.] -1

Cha Cha was planning to abandon Hazel. Otherwise why else would she open the briefcase? +1

Ben gets shotgun. -1

Klaus finally gets to flip off Hazel and Cha Cha. -3

“SHIIT” Cha Cha, you got played. I love my smart boys. -5

Vanya did well at her audition! I’m proud of her! -1

Leonard knows the exact words Reggie would have used to describe Vanya’s powers. And he uses them here. +1

“I got first chair!” Congratulations, Vanya! -2

“No one’s ever believed in me like this.” Fuck you, Reggie. +1

Having sex with Leonard/Harold desereves a couple sins. +2

Helen Cho and Reggie’s book reveal. Leonard is a creep confirmed. +2

Dr. Pogo? More like Dr. Complicit in Reggie’s Bullshit. +1

Overall Review: 

In case you couldn’t tell, this is one of my favorite episodes. Finally, all of our characters are invested in the apocalypse plot, even indirectly. Vanya’s powers emerge, the Handler and the Commission enter the chat, and Leonard is revealed to be a murderer and to have Reggie’s diary. Things are really heating up in this episode. 

I had a really hard time finding anything wrong that wasn’t character flaw is character flaw and villain character is a villain. This is a fun episode. If I wanted to show someone an episode of The Umbrella Academy to get them hooked onto the show, I would show them this episode. It moves at a perfect pace and has enough mystery to keep everyone on their toes. When I first watched this episode, I decided to stay up all night and binge the rest of them. Before I was watching one every couple of days. Episode five is what really hooked me. Props to everyone that worked on it!  

I want to give a special shout out to Sean Sullivan. He did really well playing Five! I hope we see him in season 2 for that one scene. If you’ve read the comics then you know the one. 

Sins: 4

Sentence: Watching Klaus’s breakdown after Vietnam was more than punishment enough.

[botanicallyinclinednerd]

The Umbrella Academy season 4 episode 5

YEAH ONE?!

HOW LONG ARE THEY TRAPPED HERE

*heavy sigh* from the freaking moment in the dinner in episode 1 I had a fucking FEELING they were trying to build something with these to and I fucking hate that im going to be proven right. Why. Literally *why*

YEAR *THREE*

YEAR FUCKING *FIVE*

SIX

Alright, six years in a survival situation with only one other person is gonna cause a weird dynamic. Doesn't mean I have to *like* it

Oh Klaus :(

You can see the freaking camera in the back season of their car oh my god

Hes trying to *save* you, Ben

Diego is having the time of his life

Oh my god Diego

This is clearly a filing department

Luther's got his priorities

Diego, buddy, you are so delusional

OH MY GOD HE CAN SEE ANIMAL GHOSTS

Fuck em up Allison!

Claire!

Don't be like 3 divorce guy Diego

*heavy heavy sigh*

Im not a fan of this

Oh my god Luther

Oh shit, Five's boss is one of these end of the world people

Luther, you're gonna need to Captain America your way out of this elevator, have fun, good luck

HIS PANTS WERE TEARAWAY OH MY GOD LUTHER

OH MY GODDDDD IM LAUGHING SO HARD

Luther ily

I both really don't like this and find Five to be very sweet rn

"Okay, love" how long have they been in this timeline? They were going between realities for 6 years 5 months and 2 days, but this has been longer than a day I guarantee that

FIVE. FIVE IF YOU HIDE THIS ALL BECAUSE YOU WANT TO STAY WITH LILA, YOUR BROTHERS *WIFE*...

Damnit Five

Allison and Claire are buddy! Just hold on!

HUG!!!!

HES HAD THAT FOR FIVE MONTHS?!

HOW LONG HAVE THEY BEEN LIVING HERE? probably six months and 28 days...

Hitting five repeatedly with a shovel

Oh he is so out of line here

Oh my god tell me Hargreeves dies here

SHIT, VIKTOR

Jfc, is everyone in this reality one of these world enders???

OH SHIT HES AN ALIEN LIKE HARGREEVES

FUCKING ABIGAL??? HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO SEE THAT COMING

WHAT THE FUCK

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK

YOU CANT TRUST THE NORMAL SEEMING ONES

I KNEW SHE WAS OFF

GIRL DID YOU JUST BODY SNATCH HIM

Song?

[doyelikehaggis]

The Vampire Diaries Verse (Screw-Canon Style): Klaus Mikaelson x Stefan Salvatore x Hayley Marshall | Put your arms around me and I'm home

Requested by anonymous

For a moment, Klaus can't feel a thing. It's like he's just there, floating in an abyss of nothing, without a corporeal form. Not quite existing, but just enough for him to be aware of it. Maybe this is true death, he thinks.

Or maybe it's his punishment for every sin he's committed in his life. Not quite peace, not quite hell. A limbo of sorts, where he'll be all alone, forever accompanied by nothing but his own mind. And he's content with that. It's not endless torture, and he'll take anything over that. There would be too many possibilities for ways that he could be broken.

No, this is right. This is what he deserves, and he is okay with that. In a way, he makes peace with it in that moment. 

Then it's as if he blinks, and things slowly start to form in the abyss. It turns from pure darkness to a light shade of grey, silhouettes and objects hazy and unfocused, as if just out of reach. Colours start to seep into the picture before his eyes, and his heart starts to sink. Of course he doesn't get off with simply being isolated for the rest of eternity. 

Murmurs echo around him, drifting closer, getting clearer. His eyes narrow, trying to pick out a word, something that'll help him figure out what exactly is going on. He's supposed to be dead. If he's not dead then the hollow could still take over. Everyone, especially Hope, will still be in danger. 

Laughing catches his attention. He whips around, on high alert, already trying to shift in anticipation of a fight. But his teeth stay blunt and human. He doesn't feel himself get stronger, or angrier, or feel a need for blood. Not even the presence of magic inside of him, the curse of the hollow trying to get free. It's all...gone.

"Aw, he thinks he's still the all-powerful hybrid. Isn't that adorable?"

Klaus goes completely still. His chest constricts, the air getting caught in his lungs as his head snaps up. Something won't let him turn around, though, let him see for himself. Fear. This is a hallucination of some sort. Probably caused by the hollow. Just a mind game.

"The cutest."

His heart twists, and he really can't breathe. It's not possible. Those voices. It can't be.

But he forces himself to turn around now, his heart stuttering in his chest. And there they are. His stomach drops and he can only stare wide-eyed in disbelief at Hayley and Stefan, standing so casually in front of him. So alive, their eyes bright and full of something he never thought he'd see in either of them ever again. Both wearing smiles with this look on their faces. 

"How..." he starts, but can't figure out the rest, simply shaking his head. "This isn't..."

The amusement softens across both of their features, turning to understanding. His mind can barely keep up, trying to process it and failing. It's the Hollow. It has to be. Even in death it won't leave him be, let him rest in peace. 

"It's real, Klaus," Hayley says, and her voice sounds so real. 

He just shakes his head again as Stefan nods, confirming it. He goes to step back, but stops when Hayley reaches out, her hand settling on his shoulder. The rage that had been building at this mind game he's being forced to play fizzles out like a flame underwater. It feels like everything inside of him stills, as if the whole world slows to let him catch up. 

His eyes follow her arm to her hand. He can feel it. The gentle pressure of her fingers curling around his arm, giving a squeeze of proof. Warmth emanating from her skin, and the closer he listens, he realizes with a start, he can hear her heartbeat. The same heart that he heard being crushed. The same skin he saw catch alight under the burning sun until there was nothing left of her. Yet here she is. 

Slowly, he draws in a sharp breath, light-headed all of a sudden. He lifts his eyes to meet her soft, assuring gaze. It's not a trick. He knows, because hallucinations even get things wrong, and only the real version of Hayley has ever looked at him like that. 

"It's real," he echoes back to her, and her mouth curves a little more as she gives another, single nod. 

He doesn't think, just moves, brushing her hand off to pull her into him. Her surprise is clear, but she hugs him back, arms winding around him. Klaus can barely bring himself to remember to breathe. He can feel her. Her small, powerful body in his arms, her hair against his face. Her heart beating against his chest and beneath the skin of her neck. She's real.

The second wave of realization makes him cling tighter, his breath coming out in a harsh gasp. His eyes move without him really controlling his actions. They lock onto that familiar pair of green eyes that are shining so brightly, still holding that same look that Klaus has never felt like he earned. That he thought he had missed his chance to ever see again when he heard of his death while he was too many miles away. 

Hayley pulls back, and despite the part of him that read every single letter she wrote to him wanting nothing more than to hold onto her forever, he lets her, his gaze still locked onto Stefan. 

"Well," he breathes out, "I heard you ignored me, as per usual, and did a lousy job of taking care of yourself."

Stefan's mouth curves into a grin and a soft chuckle. "You're one to talk."

Klaus can't help but laugh in return. He's crying, he realizes, feeling the wetness around his eyes. They both are. 

"I'll admit, I've missed you," Stefan says, and holds a hand out to him with dancing eyes. "Welcome to the afterlife, old friend."

Glancing at his hand, Klaus scoffs. He doesn't even hesitate in knocking it aside and pulling him in with a hand on his shoulder instead. Stefan instantly wraps his arms tightly around him, face pressed into his shoulder. Klaus grips the base of his neck and closes his eyes. For the first time, when he exhales, it doesn't feel like a weight is crushing him. 

It doesn't feel like he's going to drown in a sea of grief and despair, but is home at last. 

Yet again, he finds himself unwilling to break apart. But he forces himself to anyway, only he doesn't let go. He leans in without worry, without thought, feeling Stefan's desire as strongly as his own. Stefan, who moves to meet him as if it's the most familiar thing in the world, as if it hasn't been decades since they last kissed. 

In his heart, it doesn't feel like it has. Everything feels right now, like a rush of memories flowing through him, dropping every barrier he had in place. The same effect that Stefan has had since that day in 1922.  He just never thought he would get a chance to feel it all again, not like this.

A throat clearing draws them apart with grins. Klaus steps back and looks over at Hayley, her eyebrows raised but a smile glinting in her eyes.

"Don't worry, little wolf, there's plenty more of me for you," he says.

Hayley rolls those brilliant eyes that he's adored since their first meeting as well. "Still obnoxious in the afterlife. Got it. Are we sure this is peace and not hell?"

"Ouch." Klaus presses a mocking hand to his chest with a wolfish grin. "And here I thought you would be thrilled to see me again."

"This is certainly better than the last time we reunited," Stefan jokes, tilting his head. "Well, sort of. We're all kind of dead this time around, so I'm not too sure about that, but at least no one is trying to kill each other. That's good, right?"

Hayley doesn't agree. A dark look crosses her face. "I was hoping it would be a lot longer before this." She looks at Klaus, and he understands the glint in her eyes before she even says it. "For Hope's sake."

He presses his lips together, swallowing down the lump in his throat and the stinging still lingering in his eyes. The reality of it had slipped him for just a moment, but now he nods, smiling sadly.

"I know," he says, then draws in a shaking breath. "But she's strong. Like her mother. She can survive this." He glances at Stefan, laying a hand on his shoulder. "And she has Caroline looking out for her, along with Rebekah and Marcel, and Freya, and even Kol."

Stefan makes a noise at that, disguising the flash of pain in his eyes at the mention of Caroline. "Kol? I'm a little more worried about her now."

"Yeah, that wasn't your most uplifting speech," Hayley agrees with humour in her voice. 

"I knew there was a reason I never wanted to introduce the two of you," Klaus says dryly, and points a finger at them. "I will not be ganged up on! Elijah will be joining us soon, I assume, and the last thing I need is three against one."

"Oh yeah, no can do, buddy," Stefan says, patting his hand. He shares a grin with Hayley. "We've gotten pretty close waiting for you over here. I don't know if we can make any promises on that one."

Hayley shakes her head. "Absolutely not."

"Alright." Klaus drops his hand from Stefan's shoulder. "I'm going to wait over there for my dear brother, far away from the two of you."

"Yeah, good luck with that because we're not going anywhere," Hayley says cheerily, and Stefan agrees.

Despite the front he's putting on, he feels an insurmountable joy. He hopes they're right, because he couldn't bear to lose either of them again. Just seeing them together feels like a blessing, something far more precious than anything he has ever been deserving of in his life.

He would be happy to listen to the two of them tease and trade jibes about him for hours, because it means they're both here with him, and happy. At peace. He understands now why he's here, somewhere in the middle of the bayou. This is his peace. Stefan and Hayley. They're his happy ending, the one thing he never thought that he would get. He's happy to be wrong.

[kl4us4]

CHURCHYARD (Klaus Hargreeves x Female!Reader)

Summary: Klaus communicates with Spirits. You communicate with Angels. 

ua masterlist

general masterlist

warning: angsty af, swearing, kinda sad.

You sit beside Klaus, leaning your head against his shoulder as you watch Five serve himself a cup of black coffee. The day is bright and young, and though you had a grand rest, Klaus hadn’t. He never sleeps, that much you’re convinced of.

Klaus nudges his shoulder, giving you a forced smile as you turn to look at him. “You okay?” You wonder, examining his expression. He looks annoyed, uncomfortable.

“I feel... suffocated.” He states curtly, sending a painful ache to your chest.

“Oh. Sorry.” You’re not sure what he means but you scoot your chair away from him, frowning down.

Five shoots a look between the two of you before turning the attention elsewhere. “This coffee tastes like shit.” The boy frowns, yet he takes another sip before placing it down onto the table.

“It’s Brazilian coffee,” Klaus responds, resting a hand onto his temple as he begins rubbing it, “It’s imported.”

“Well,” Five pours the coffee into the sink, before he leaves and calls out, “Brazilian coffee is shit!”

Chuckling to yourself, you rest your hand against Klaus’ thigh. He flinched slightly. “How are you doing?” You ask him, noticing the pain evident on his face, “I know you didn’t sleep much last night-”

“How do you think I’m doing?” He shoots back sarcastically, rising from his seat with his head still in his hands.

“Is there anything I can do to help?” You wonder, voice quieter now in fear of being shut down again. You stand to follow him. He paces up the stairs and you frown, “Klaus, I’m trying to help-”

“Help?” He repeats, the inklings of a smile on his lips, “You want to help? Oh, that’s lovely, Y/N!” You look down at your feet as he walks down a step on the stairs, towering over you slightly. Klaus’ black stained eyes stare into yours. “Can you talk to your buddies up there?”

Your face falls, “Klaus, I-”

“Let them know they’re assholes,” he spits, pointing heavenward, “How is it that you get to speak to them while I get stuck with tormented dead people? Huh?”

“We don't choose the hand we get dealt,” you tell him, frowning as you clench your first by your side, “I didn’t ask for any of this. Why are you mad at me for something I can’t control?”

“I’m not mad at you!”

“Yes, you are! You’re yelling at me!”

“I’m just...”

“What?”

“I’m tired!” Klaus exclaims, pressing his hands onto his eyes as he sighs, “I’m tired, okay?! I want to sleep.” Klaus sighs, sitting down on the staircase, defeated, “I just want peace. I want the peace that you get to feel every day! Every night... and I want to be free of this torment.” He admits, keeping his eyes closed and trying to ignore the noise that comes with being two days sober. You reach for his hand, wishing that he didn’t tear himself away from you. “Don’t start.”

“With what?”

“With that angelic bullshit you always give me.” He finishes, standing from the staircase. Angelic bullshit? Your eyes widen slightly and your lips part... he always does this. He always makes you feel stupid about your powers. You can talk to higher beings, angels, whatever they’re called, they give you guidance, they help you see future events sometimes. They’ve been there for you more times than your own boyfriend has.

“I... I wasn’t going to,” you admit, slowly rising from kneeling on the staircase, “I should go. You clearly need to be left alone.”

“Good, you got the hint,” Klaus replies, his back already turned as he ascends the stairs, “Finally.”

With one last look at the figure walking away from you, you rush to the door half expecting Klaus to shout your name and apologise. But he doesn’t. Not this time. Usually, your fights start and end with Klaus’ words.

“Y/N,” comes a voice from beside you. You turn, seeing Diego and you quickly wipe the tears from under your eyes, “He doesn’t mean it, I’m sure he’s just in a bad mood.”

“Yeah,” you nod, barely looking at Diego, “I tell myself that every time.” Turning to exit, you pause before looking back at Diego, “You know what? I don’t think love is enough for Klaus... something inside of him won’t accept it. The same part that won’t accept help or that shuns out anyone who cares for him even a little bit. He takes it and he tears all the love in him apart,” you look up at the staircase, seeing Klaus stand there watching you speak of him. Your eyes never leave his, even when you begin tearing up again, “And I’m sick of being talked down to just for loving him.”

The fresh morning air does nothing to clear your mind. You sit at a park, watching people pass by, some holding hands with one another, some walking their dog, some young children with their grandparents eating icecream. A familiar man sits beside you.

“Gabriel,” you greet him, not turning to face the being.

“You know that is not my name,” his voice is deep and calm.

“You have no name,” you remind him, “So I gave you one. Are you here to bring me a vision about the future of the Hargreeves?” You wonder, know there are big things they have yet to face; bigger things than their long lost sibling coming back from the future.

Gabriel shakes his head, his hands resting in his lap. “No, Y/N.”

“Then what is it?” You turn to him, gazing at him. He watches the park goers silently before turning to look back at you.

“I sensed that you needed guidance.”

You remain silent for a second, looking away and at the scenery, “Tell me, how do people know what is hurt and what is love?”

“You need help distinguishing the two?”

You nod... but you also shrug, “He... he acts like he hates me. He says things that will drive me away, things he knows will hurt me. I’m not sure if I’ve just convinced myself that he doesn’t truly mean any of it.”

“Humans tend to push away the care and love that they do not feel worthy of.” He responds, “It’s possible that being two days sober, and so eager to fall back into his addiction, he’s pushing away the one thing keeping him on the right path.”

You think it over. “Maybe.”

“Does he love you more than he wants to hurt you?”

“I guess not,” you admit, staring at the shadows cast by the sun shining through the tall trees.

“Why do you think that is?”

“I think he likes feeling wanted, sometimes,” you admit, knowing how loving he is when you come back to him, “someone else having faith in him restores whatever faith he lacks in himself. But I also know he’s filled with fear.”

“Fear is difficult to overcome. Do you know what he is afraid of?”

“Being left alone. Losing someone.” You list it, “Klaus doesn’t know if he wants someone to love or someone to take care of him. I think he’s confused the two somehow... he’s loving and kind, but he hates having to live up to that. He’s scared of reciprocating my feelings... my care, for him.”

“Klaus Hargreeves is a complex character.” Gabriel nods, “He’s conflicted. He’s envious, at night he’s restless to sleep because of his powers,” you look to Gabriel, “He’s suffering.”

“I suppose you can’t change that.” You state.

“No. No, I cannot,” Gabriel glances at you, he takes a breath, “I don’t suppose you’re upset at me for that?”

You shrug, “No,” you admit, “It’s not your place, I guess. No one gets to choose the life they’re born into.”

“Indeed.” He repeats, “Do you believe you can live life without the Hargreeves? Knowing what you know about their future.”

You shake your head, looking off to the side, “Their future is my future. And my past is theirs. We may not all see eye to eye, but we will forever be bonded by having begun our journey together in the Umbrella Academy.”

“That is a good way of viewing things,” Gabriel hums, “I must advise you, I sense a change in the winds, Y/N.”

“A good change?”

“It depends on how you overcome it, but it is a change nevertheless.” He states, his hands clasped and resting on his lap, “I bid you good luck in the next coming days. Your decision to stay close to the Hargreeves is wise. They need you.”

“They need me?”

“Indeed.” He nods, affirming, “I cannot tell you any more. Beyond the next two weeks is uncertain. Stay close to those who feel left out, forgotten, especially in this time of need. Reginald Hargreeves has passed on and leaves a legacy of neglect in his wake.” Turning to look at you, Gabriel leaves one of his pointed hints to aid you and give you guidance, “Keep an eye out for those who feel his neglect the most.”

You nod before looking down at your feet, the sound of fluttering wings signals his departure. All you can do is let out a long sigh as you continue watching the people live their lives around you.