#mb went on a little ramble there

[pencilgutz]

Photos taken moments before disaster

[three-bunnies-in-a-trenchcoat]

Everytime I hear tears of the kingdom being referred to as "the best" Zelda game or smth like "it's truly the legend of zelda" I get one mile closer

[spinningbagel]

Universe travellers//defenders(? I guess?) au

@liendrawing7071 wanted this one talked about so it's the next one on the chopping block.

Another one where the description is in the Au title.

The basics of it is that La Résistance are a group of travellers who travel different worlds/fandoms, helping to restore the worlds back to how they're supposed to be because of parasitic creatures making their way through the worlds and destroying them. (This is this Au's version of the mutants, though there's no cure to getting rid of them besides killing them all and their leader)

Sheriff and Shooter stumble into this business by pure accident, both being new workers at a very prestigious science lab (Dr. Whites Lab). Also their friendship is established from the start. Felt like mentioning it

Anyways, they end up in an area they're not actually supposed to be in and catch Vegan and BP going through one of the portals leading to another universe. Being idiots, they follow.

Chaos ensues, they almost die. Vegan and BP are rightfully pissed at them. They almost get fired when Dr. White intervenes and says more people helping isn't a bad thing and Sheriff and Shooter join the party [[yippie]]

So that happens and now they're travelling universes, helping each of them out and stuff. Idk. That's what I've got.

Also Ryan is alive and living in this Au, nothing bad happens to him (this isn't me being ominous, I'm being genuine when I say this. Man's deserves a break.) and he's got a pizza shop because Tori started that thought and I've never been able to let it go since.

OH yeah, Brutux is present I haven't forgotten about him. He's part of the group before Sheriff and Shooter, he's like the teams tank but will occasionally stay back with White to assist in researching the parasites.

So yeah, that's the basic outline for that Au, it's definitely one of my least fleshed out ideas but yk. Fuck it we ball.

Uhhh,,, ask box is always open for further questions 👍👍

[seraphmeraph]

hi!! i recently found ur account while scrounging thru the bi han tag (theres so little bi han x reader fics 😭) and i love ur writing so i was wondering if you could do a bi han x princess reader? maybe the lin kuei made some kind of alliance with a king and he falls jn love (or lust) with his daughter? idk if that makes a lot of sense lolll. anyways thank u and i love ur work!!

i gen never expected people to really like Bi Han that much

Bi Han x Princess Reader

MK1 short story with smut at the end starring guess who?? BI HAN <3

TW: 18+, smut at end, fingering, praises, suggestive, boobs, Bi Hans not as degrading, forbidden love

A/N: mb for this shittiness anon i tried LMAO- I feel like by now everybody should know i dead just don't proofread

Your father, the kind, wanted to strengthen his kingdom's defenses. So, to achieve this, he proposed an alliance with the enigmatic Lin Kuei.

You first met Bi Han at a banquet to congratulate your alliance. Your father introduced him to you as the Grandmaster of the Lin Kuei. You couldn't help but feel attracted to his cold and rough attitude, not to mention how handsome he was.

Bi Han's heart fluttered when he saw you, but he tried to push it deep away, feeling unfamiliar with this feeling. But as time passed, he couldn't help but try to be closer to you. He wanted to hear your rambles and see your beautiful eyes and elegance.

He would purposefully run into you, planning and taking notes on locations you would stop by. One of these is the royal garden, where you'd take a walk every day. Slowly, you noticed how often you would see the Grandmaster. You found it unusual, but you didn't mind his presence.

Slowly, it went from seeing each other to striking up conversations with him. He would often give you advice for your duties as a princess.

As you two grew closer, you would often find yourself openly complimenting him and subtly flirting.

"I'm aware you're a cryomancer, but does your heart ever get cold? Maybe my presence can warm it," You spoke, gaining a little smile from him. It was the first time you had ever seen him smile, and it made the butterflies in your stomach go crazy.

Considering he's unfamiliar, you are likely the first to admit your feelings. You asked him to meet you in the royal garden at night, and when he showed up, you began confessing.

The garden was very serene and peaceful. The moon cast a pale, silvery light over the garden, illuminating the flowers and trees. It was filled with the sweet fragrance of the blooming flowers. The pathway was dimly lit with the soft glowing lanterns, casting a warm and inviting light onto you both.

"Princess," He greeted you with a bow. "Is there a reason you requested to see me this belatedly at night?" He questioned, his voice gruff, but his eyes betrayed him.

"Yes…" You took a deep breath. "Grandmaster, I believe I'm in love with you," You admitted, wasting no time admitting your feelings. Though you were nervous, you were also confident.

"Princess…" He trailed off, unsure what to say.

You stepped closer to him, feeling your heart beating faster with anticipation. "Please, don't say anything if you don't feel the same way. I just had to tell you how I feel," You said, trying to hide your disappointment.

But before you could leave him, he pulled you in and kissed you. He backed you into one of the pillars, pressing your back against it. The kiss became passionate. All his pent-up lust for you is pouring out now. His cold hands were going to cup your cheek.

Your love was forbidden, a princess with a Lin Kuei assassin? Not to mention, you were the next heir to the throne. Your father would prohibit you from ever seeing Bi Han again and most likely change the relationship between your kingdom and the Lin Kuei.

A secret relationship between you both blossomed. Bi Han would often meet you in your chambers or the garden. Occasionally, he would convince your father that he was best fit to guard you whenever you had events.

BONUS

You would leave your balcony window open for Bi Han to climb through at night. This was one of the nights when Bi Han visited you.

"Grandmaster!" You almost exclaimed, getting up off your bed to see him closer.

"Bi Han," He corrected you with a slight smirk.

"Sorry," You giggled, taking hold of his hand and bringing it to your cheek. His excellent hands felt cold against your warm cheek. "I missed you, Bi Han," You smiled, looking up at him.

His thumb grazed your cheek as you continued to hold it. "I did too, my princess," He spoke, leaning over to kiss you.

His lips pressed against yours, and you both were locked into a fiery kiss. Bi Han's other hand gripped your waist, pulling you deeply into the kiss. His tongue grazed your bottom lip, gaining entry into your mouth.

Bi Han couldn't contain his desire anymore. Pulling away from you, he threw you over his shoulder, carrying you over to your bed. You giggled at his roughness and kicked your legs, but he easily held them in place.

He threw you down on the bed, got on top of you, and continued your kiss. One of his hands gripped your thigh, pushing up your nightgown just enough to expose your panties.

Your hands went up to his hair, fingers reaching his bun. You quickly undid it, letting his hair down.

He pulled away from the kiss again, pinning your hands above your head. His hair fell around his shoulders.

"You're so handsome with your hair down," You looked at him lovingly.

"Is that so?" He spoke, his hand trailed closer to your core.

You couldn't help but shiver, feeling his cold fingers touch the sensitive part of your thigh. He then let go of your hand, using both to pull the nightgown over your head.

You sigh softly, feeling Bi Han's hands run over your body. His lips followed down your body, stopping to give your breasts extra attention. Rubbing your nipple in between his fingers while sucking the other one. His eyes looked up at you, watching as your face contorted into one of pleasure.

His hand slid down to your stomach, holding you in place as he kissed your body.

"Tell me, do I have your approval, Princess?" He said teasingly, smirking.

"Yes-Yes," You babbled, running your hand through his long hair.

He pulled your panties off, and his thumb massaged your clit as the other hand spread your thighs further apart.

You bit your bottom lip, keeping your legs open for Bi Han.

He inserted two digits into your heat, the cold of his fingers giving you goosebumps. He began pistoning his fingers in and out of you at a fast pace, not giving you any warning.

"Bi-Bi Han!" You grabbed at his shoulders as he continued his assault on your pussy.

"Tell me how you feel, pretty girl," He spoke, his eyes never leaving your face, obsessed with your reactions.

Let's hope you don't wake the whole castle up.

[xf-cases-solved]

i'm aware that ACNH hasn't been relevant since the plague, so i'm not really sure why this headcanon even came to me in the first place--mb it was gifted to me by god like a prophecy or some shit idk--but i came to the sudden and unrelenting realization the other day that, if given the opportunity, scully would get WAY too into animal crossing

[this ended up being a ridiculously long stream of consciousness headcanon ramble, so i'm putting it under a read more bc it is silly and self-indulgent, but i had to write it out somewhere 👇🏽]

to clarify, the scenario i'm specifically picturing is if switches existed in the 90s and original-run scully got to play new horizons

she would never pick it up on her own accord, but imagine her at her godson's birthday or something and he introduces her to this silly little game that has cute animals and "oh, that's nice and wholesome, glad there are at least some video games out there that aren't all about violence" etc etc

but then somehow she ends up with her own copy. mb she does it for the social aspect of having something to share with her godson or whatever, the why of it doesn't matter. what matters is that, due to some series of events, scully ends up with a copy of animal crossing that she then proceeds to lose her entire sense of self inside of

it's the literal perfect game for her! first off, it's incredibly chill, and lord knows she can never get enough chill time. second off, the little quests in the game would stimulate the parts of her brain that like Tasks and Puzzles and Validation. she'd get a huge kick out of figuring out how to breed all the different types of flowers, and knowing during what time of day/type of weather/time of year certain bugs or fish were around. the good grades she would get on her house and island would fuel her. she would have the EXACT right amount of trees. no weeds. all the fruits. she'd find the most logical way to terraform her island so that it was both cute and efficient. she would lose HOURS to this shit, ok?

and it would take mulder a little while to notice

bc scully obvi wouldn't play at work, and also would be kind of embarrassed that she was spending so much time with a video game, so she'd hide it. but the longer it went on, the more there would be slip-ups

mulder asks her one day when they stop for gas in some random town how much the sunflower seeds she grabbed for him cost, and she says, "75 bells," before immediately correcting herself and saying, "cents! 75 cents!" (this wouldn't be the last "bells" slip)

mulder's on the phone with her one night rambling about a case, not really noticing that she hasn't been listening to a word he's been saying until he hears her mutter, "oh fuck you, astrid," and when he questions her she hastily explains that astrid is her annoying new neighbor (who is decidedly NOT a kangaroo, obviously)

she's always been brilliant, but suddenly she knows a lot of seemingly random trivia about different types of beetles and butterflies for some reason

he wonders if she's always had such a strong aversion to sea bass

eventually he catches her in the act, probably when he bursts into her hotel room through the adjoining door one day to tell her a new theory, only to find her curled up in her bed wrapped in her comforter, clutching her little yellow switch, and staring at him like he just caught her with a vibrator

and ofc he makes fun of her a little, but mostly he thinks it's cute

until

she makes him get a copy so they can trade items

which he does, bc 1. he always likes to have a reason to spend time with her outside of work, and 2. he cannot tell her no

which is how, on nights when there aren't any monsters to chase down or aliens falling from the sky, he finds himself lugging virtual supplies to scully's island (bc "i need more hard wood, mulder" and like, it's not the type of hard wood he wants to give her, but ya kno), and getting chastised for how cluttered his dumb animated house is ("you won't get a good ranking from the happy home academy if you don't coordinate your wallpaper, carpet, and furniture, mulder"). he hasn't picked a weed on his island the entire time he's had the game and it drives her Insane, which is why he does it, bc watching her silly little character running around his island in a frenzy plucking weeds is adorable (and god, how pathetic is it that he finds her adorable even in animal crossing character form??)

he does find some personal entertainment from the game. he likes collecting shooting stars and swimming and trying to guess which pieces of art are counterfeit. mostly, tho, he just likes how much scully likes it; he likes how, when she's playing or talking about the stupid game she laughs easier. he likes seeing her do something silly, just for the fun of it, and he likes that she lets him be a part of it

she invites him to her island one night, and she takes him to the shore, where she shows him where she terraformed a little area with a bench, flowers, and a telescope, and tells him she made it for the two of them to go stargazing together

their dumb little characters sit next to each other and watch pretend stars in the dark, and they both feel immensely loved

(she'll ask him if he brought her that new seasonal wardrobe he got later. she needs it to complete the set, but she can wait. not like, a super long time, obviously--the happy home academy sends their letter tomorrow and she'll be pissed if she doesn't get an A--but they can stay out under the night sky together. for a little longer, at least ❤️)

[trashbag-baby666]

Twin Dads Clegan AU :3

MB made by the lovely @austeenbootler as we bring you a little piece of something we’ve been creating!! (afab!androgynous!gale)

C/W:Mentions of miscarriages

MOTA Masterlist!

John and Gale struggled with fertility for years, the first few times were extra hard. Gale was living alone on an air force base while John was deployed. They were young and hadn’t even been married a full year.

Around week eight of Gales pregnancy and Johns first tour, Gale sends him a letter with the photos of the sonogram. theoretically, he could've told him over email or Skype. But it just didn't seem like something he could fathom saying out loud if this wasn't something John wanted.

Curt can attest to the actual tears John shed after tearing open the letter, he was so excited. He spent the next month blabbing about how excited he was to be a dad. He would blab in the fighter jets during missions about what he was going to name their kid. John literally talked about being a dad 24/7.

Then he got the heartbreaking email then call from Gale. He was at the hospital and he had miscarried.

Curt ends up emailing his partner Ken what’s going on and maybe to stop over.

Ken and Gale become instant friends after the day.

Unfortunately, John and Gale had six different miscarriages over the next eight years. Getting less and less excited and hopeful each time.

Then it happened after they stopped trying for awhile. Gale was pregnant and unsure if he even wanted to try and go through the pregnancy. He didn’t want to suffer the heartbreak of losing another one. But after lots of discussion with John and his doctors and therapist they decided to continue the pregnancy.

They were worried and scared their entire pregnancy. Every time Gale had unexplainable cramps or anything abnormal they would rush to the hospital. They would assure them everything was alright.

Then they found out they were having twins!!! They were boys and they were so very excited. They spent a full month thinking about a second name before landing on Andrew and Arlo.

They also went out and basically bought an additional second of everything…

They would sit in the nursery together a lot. Gale would sit in John’s lap in the chair. His long hair tied back and John’s got his arms around him. He’s rambling about how great of dads they’re going to be.

Gales pregnancy cravings were INTENSE but John was jumping up to get him whatever he wanted!! No matter how odd it is.

Strawberries, peanut butter, and Doritos…pickles and ice cream…spaghetti o’s…

John almost passed out while Gale was giving birth…the nurses literally had to get him juice and crackers. Gale was rolling his eyes and telling John to quit being dramatic. …He almost passed out again when they cut the umbilical cords.

The first week of course was rough, Gale was healing the boys weren’t sleeping. John was jumping up to take care of them at night and making Gale lay down.

After a couple weeks they’re more under control, Gale sits in the chair they got for the nursery. Gale breast feeds one while John holds the other. He leans against the footrest singing blue skies to them softly rocking them.

Arlo ends up having dark brown curls like John and Andrew has cute little blonde curls. Gale loves to sit and play with the boys curls.

Curt and Ken are the go to baby sitters, obviously. They literally live next door to them.

The first vacation they have after the twins are one is hard for them. Gale feels guilty leaving them but John keeps assuring him that the boys will be okay.

However, Curt and Ken do FaceTime Gale and John a couple times a day so they can see the boys.

They really do get to relax though, couple massages, and spa days, Gale really got the treatment he deserved.

[sophieswundergarten]

In the very, very crack AU that's been swirling around my brain for a while, I've been wondering who would be a Time Lord in a Doctor Who/MBS crossover

Now, obviously, it could be Nicholas & Nathaniel for the Doctor & Master conflict.

However, I think once you get past the easy options it gets a lot funnier

Milligan. Just, Milligan as a Time Lord. Wandering around. Maybe he uses the Chameleon Arch thing and gets amnesia while pretending to be human, maybe he's just messing around and pretending to have amnesia because he panicked and couldn't think of a proper cover. The thing is, then, is Kate his biological daughter? I mean, she still could be, but I'm not touching the disaster that is DW genetic familial relationships with a ten foot pole so that's not my problem

Rhonda would actually be really, really good at disguises and blending in. I think she'd actually be great at just popping into random situations and helping but not freaking people out. She still does a lot of vandalism stuff because honestly sometimes people deserve it, but now she's got a psychic paper that just lets her get out of whatever trouble she might have been in

Number Two. That's all I've got to say

Miss Perumal, similar to Rhonda, I think would be absolutely great at the helpful part. She just settles down and pours herself into helping a few people or a certain community. Everyone loves her, and she occasionally lets very special people she trusts go traveling with her, but for the most part everyone just thinks she's a really sweet, eccentric lady who's a bit mysterious

Garrison... is still having her breakdown, but this time it's not just about Curtain. He's the final straw after years of human stupidity and misuse of her technology that she's been trying to help them with. She's Not Doing Alright. She loses her faith in humanity for a little bit, and Curtain was kind of her last-ditch attempt to see if people could be better but then he went off the rails and she's not sure what to do now but she just can't leave because he's actually got some powerful alien tech

After you rule out most of the adults, it gets even weirder in my book, but I don't think anyone wants to hear me ramble about which of the kids it most likely to secretly be an immortal time traveling alien with the current state of my mind

[safety-pin-punk]

HI PUNK IM ALIVE MY COMPUTER BROKE WHATS UP HOMIE HOWS MOUNTAIN BOY

LMAO, no worries 😂. BUT ALSO OH NO YOUR COMPUTER I AM SO SORRY

And uuuhhhhhhhh. Yeah so. Mountain Boy is my boyfriend now 😅. But we are both insanely busy this month so our ‘official’ first date is gonna be mid October (*cries*). But is okay cause we’ve been trying to do a bunch of little things inbetween

He bought me ice cream last week, and then this week we went and watched airplanes land at night after work. Idk what we are gonna do this week, but I wont see him until after the weekend anyways cause hes out camping with his dad and I’m going to oktoberfest with some friends from the thrift store (its nice knowing they haven’t forgotten about me since I got a new job lol).

But it honestly doesnt feel like much has changed between me and MB? Maybe just cause we haven’t gotten to go on a date date yet? Or maybe cause we’ve kinda been dating without dating for years anyways? Idk. But like. Its not stressful and Im happy when Im with him soo (usually anyways lol - he did royally piss me off way earlier this summer but we’re good now). And yeah apparently all it took to actually date him was to first date a different guy who was also an asshole and then MB just got jealous. And also drunk mario party helped but that was back in June and apparently has stuck in his head since

Okay Im done rambling lmao. HOW ARE YOU????

[icharchivist]

hello icha!! as a celebration to getting thru drawing all of spring troupe for the first time I went through the a tag team for halloween event. honestly, I thought this event would be overshadowed by the knowledge that nocturnality is right after it (of which. funnily enough I’m actually not sure what the play is about? my bet is on gay vampires.) but this event… it was so good!!! like, it didn’t emotionally devastate me or anything but it was sooo good. such a cute ending too. but it gave me like so many thoughts so this message might get a lil long lol.

well first off the very moment tasuku showed up and was like “…” abt the Halloween event bc he was getting into his god troupe angst I was putting my hands together in prayer like. tasuku taichi as the center of this event please. and I was right! also I love how like. by now it feels like my thoughts sync up with a3 the gane quite often lol. like juza and hisoka got paired and I was like “they are just going to eat the candy” and banri immediately says that and then they do. someone suggests azuma be a demon and I was like “oh yea he’d be a sexy demon” and boom izumi says he will look seductive. oh one thing I did not agree with tho is during the improv battles someone was like “oh this mummy skit is so funny bc they both look like such tough guys!” which is like. okay omi I understand but tsuzuru looks like he could keel over with a strong wind. he’s got the whole delicate vibe abt him. and a side note i like to imagine yuki was like… hm I only have enough fabric for one mummy really… guess they’ll just be mostly topless. sakyo will be proud of my budgeting skills. jokes aside the whole spiderweb on tsuzurus face and the hand details. they’re good I checked out his ssr card and very much liked it.

anyways the true highlight of this event was quite obviously the taichi and tasuku dynamic and everything. I had a lot of thoughts so I’m just going to ramble. first off it’s really nice to get some more glimpses of how tasuku might have felt being in god troupe—I feel like he’s got this very heavy guilt associated with it and also I think he felt very. lonely. and since he was the Star of the troupe I also imagine he rly felt like yknow a little dehumanized. propped up as the top. what rly struck me was how while ppl like yuki and tenma r so whatever abt haruto, tasuku is like “fuck you. still not at the top, huh?” like immediate confrontation. he probably had a much more personal experience there after all. ah and with tasuku and taichi, what with taichi never really acting within the troupe, I was thinking about how like so much of winter act 1 is about acting with subtlety in comparison to how grand the god troupe is—that’s tsumugi’s style and when he tries to imitate tasuku is does not go well. i was also thinking abt like. tasukus role in that play… I mean he’s got his grand moments for sure but a lot of that character is just abt being quietly affectionate I think. and that’s subtle too. i think tasuku Can be grand but I do wonder if his acting was mb a lil stifled in god troupe…? anyways I bring this all up bc I think taichi’s style of acting is very the same way! he’s not powerful as in loud but I think his acting is very all abt charming you into how natural it is like. he’s very much a moodmaker to me? and that again is a much more subtle part of acting. i do think abt how like. taichi himself is pretty good at faking being cheery and with the whole being a spy and all for autumn troupe it’s like. well clearly he has some acting chops to pull that off. anyways all of this is to say. i really did like this event. it was nice to see taichi face it head on and I liked that he went straight for the top with the wizard costume and won! and the event cg is ADORABLE. also I was thinking abt tenma and sakuyas improv team and what they’d do and I realized. oh my god it’s Halloween. did tenma get too scared of a ghost to perform properly lmao

HIIIII!! GLAD TO SEE YOU AGAIN! oh god you're really getting closer and closer to Nocturnality huh. Soon…. BUT!!! TAG TEAM HALLOWEEN!! glad you enjoyed it!!

under cut again bc long enough as it is

the fact you're synching up more and more with a3 is so nice. it's also a testament to a3's writing how, the characters are so specific you can expect "this" would be the best course to explore those characters, and then it is! Tasuku Taichi in focus was sooo good, the sweet tooth pair still makes me laugh, sexy sexy Azuma beloved…

"okay omi I understand but tsuzuru looks like he could keel over with a strong wind. "

HOWLERING

"and a side note i like to imagine yuki was like… hm I only have enough fabric for one mummy really… guess they’ll just be mostly topless. sakyo will be proud of my budgeting skills. "

this is genuinely so funny. Yuki arguing that them being shirtless is good for budget both because it means less fabric AND because it'll attract more people, Omi and Tsuzuru being "huh.. i'm not so s-" and Sakyo just being "no he's right, let him". The unlikely team up. But yeah the mummy designs are genuinely so good :sob: Tsuzuru looks so good especially.

Everything you say about Tasuku gets right to my feelings, you know how to speak to me so well. But yeah, man like. The isolation of being at the top and knowing you've been set up to crush the people around you by being there, even though you never wanted to be this high and you were prompted that high… Taichi especially directly suffered from it and Tasuku is so aware now of how much it broke him and how it pushed him to do horrible things that he just feels so guilty and it's just gnnnhhh Tasuku i love u. tho yes him imediately slamming Haruto was pretty funny. So i really love that once Tasuku understands Taichi's deal he immediately jumps on doing anything to have Taichi shine, even though Taichi didn't ask him to do that. Like, Taichi wanted to be the wizard but he never asked Tasuku to be the werewolf, it's Tasuku who, the moment he understood, went "i'll give Taichi exactly the night he wanted to have when we were at the Godza". And tbh Tasuku is so much better as a support actor (as in, how he works out specifically to help the person he supports shine) that it is just so good and satisfying.

And yes omg everything about Taichi's acting! He's just really great and you can also totally see how he doesn't fit the God Troupe AT ALL. One thing that strikes me too is that Taichi is especially good when he is reacting to the people around him and feeding off from what he's given. In the first Autumn play, he becomes really really good the moment all of Autumn tries to "outshine" each other and put themselves in a competition, but they therefore also feed on each other and each other's reaction, and Taichi's darkness moment especially was really a reflection of that. But in the Godza he was written off right from the start and never given an opportunity to even have this type of bouncing off with the other actors. I think Taichi both have the very subtle acting that Tsumugi also does so well, but also just how much he is so good at interreacting with others that this is how he shines and sublimes the people around him as well, so if you basically ask him to carry something solo (which is likely the way the Godza organized their audition) he will likely stumble a bit. Not to mention it does take him a moment to get into the heat of things, re: how long it took him to grasp how he wanted to play Zero. Which is good! that's what reharsal are for, to get a better vibe of your own character! but, compared to Tasuku who immediately can get into a role, this basically constantly work against Taichi. It's like the Godza is only seeking perfection and immediate Talent, but the thing is that Taichi stumbles a little /at FIRST/, you just need to let him figure out how to do it which he will do it more quickly than you expect (just like the yoyo tbh), that he's more subtle to start with so it makes for even more work to show it off, and that he's going to shine and make people shine brighter if you specifically let him improvise on the actors around him, which doesn't work for such a solo, isolated mindset in the Godza. (very slight spoiler but it is mentioned very much later down the line that the actors at Godza were basically discouraged from trying to talk with each other outside of the plays and befriend each other, and i can't see Taichi bloom in this situation.)

I'm just so happy Taichi went on and decided to indulge himself, and that Tasuku took one look at it and just, decided he'll be his support no matter what, it was really emotional and they worked so well together. I keep thinking about how, when you play the game, if you put Taichi and Tasuku in the same team, they have the team tag "They entered Heaven, not knowing it was Hell" and it's just, GOD, the imagery of that. THE CG WAS ADORABLEEEE

AND HELPPPPP. Tenma probably got scared shitless yeah. Rest in pieces sweetheart, you tried.

Thank you once again for sharing your thoughts on this event <333 i'm so glad you liked it.

Also it makes me think, i probably mentioned it before because it makes me cry everytime, but in 2019 the A3 cast had a massive concert where they played the solos, group, and duet songs they've done so far (the duets too were made in full cosplay recreation of each play, it is incredible to watch). Point is, i still cry and think about how.

At some point Tsumugi's will have his solo, Keyword, on the stage, pouring out all of his emotions about taking this strength in and accept the spotlight and the support he got from Tasuku right? A song that ends also with this bit: "I’ll search for as long as it takes to reach a future with you / I won’t stop anymore; let’s tie these loose ends and walk together / These feelings I just couldn’t let go of / Will become the key that creates our next show" As he ends the song, he points to the audience, and there, only there, you see that on the special, recluse stage in the audience, Tasuku's VA is standing, smiling and pointing at Tsumugi on stage, sending the clear message "i'm the audience this time, go ahead and shine, i support you".

There, Tasuku has his own solo, Beyond the Wall, which is basically just him proclaiming how much he's going to support Tsumugi and everything, and especially about Tasuku making the effort to meet him halfway this time, that they have to work together ect... And then. Tasuku's Va ends the song, and then he points back to the stage;

Where Taichi's VA is on, taking the full spotlight, before he gets to sing Living The Dream. Which is this whole song about his mess of feelings, about how he wanted to be popular, his guilt about betraying everyone, how now he wants to work even harder to get to his dream. "Someone stop time / Make my dream come true /One day, to the other side of the dream / Yes; while gazing at everyone's backs /I learned the importance of the flow of time"

And it KILLS MEEEEEE because like, it sets up, as the live is made, Tasuku as taking the step back in the audience and asking YOU, the audience, to pay attention to Tsumugi AND Taichi, the two people who ended up crushed by him being on stage, and now he's there!! giving THEM the stage, giving THEM the spotlight!!

Froting in my mouth, POINT Is, i think about it everytime because this event also does it, but, they really set up Tasuku as just wanting to be the unconditional support for the two of them. and i'm crying. And i probably told this story before but indulge me in repeating it because i'll never be okay.

(if you want to watch it, it's here at the 2:01:00 mark and it lasts for about 10 mins- it's just after Juza's solo if you want to go back a bit to see that tho)

Event - 1 before the Nocturnality Experience, hanging in there? :3c

HAVE FUN SWEETIE AND THANKS AS USUAL FOR THE THOUGHTS <33333

[three-bunnies-in-a-trenchcoat]

Still so funny that if not for my typical "Hey maybe I should put this off for a while" strategy for the end of games I would've walked directly into the Ganondorf fight without seeing a single one of Zelda's memories

[dialovers-translations]

DIABOLIK LOVERS MORE BLOOD Vol.2: Mukami Kou [Track 1+2]

Original title: 目隠しされて & 無神コウ

Source: Diabolik Lovers More, Blood Vol. 2: Mukami Kou [CD not owned by me]

Audio: Here (00:00~14:03)

Seiyuu: Kimura Ryouhei

Translator’s note: Continuing my marathon of MB CDs, everyone’s favorite idol Kou-kun is up next! I’m not a huge Kou fan myself, but he’s the main bias of my best friend so I’m always reminded of her when I translate his CDs. :p I used to find his voice quite annoying in the past, but in this CD, it didn’t bother me too much.

Track 1+2 ll Track 3+4 ll Track 5+6 ll Track 7+8 ll Track 9+10

→  LIKE MY TRANSLATIONS? SUPPORT ME ON KO-FI!

Track 1: Blindfolded

“...Hey!”

*Creaaak*

“Hey, you...!”

*Creaaak*

“Are you listening?”

*Rustle rustle*

“Say, say...~”

*Rustle rustle*

[00:15] “...Ah! Seems like you finally woke up! Ahー Thank god! You just kept on snoozing forever, for a second I thought you’d never wake up again!”

You look around, seeming confused.

“Eh? You want to know where you are...? Eeh...~ How cruel! You don’t recall? ーー Everything that happened before getting here, I mean.”

You flinch.

“Ahaha~ Seems like you remembered, huh? Exactly. I kidnapped you here~”

You ask him why.

[00:52] “...’Why’? You’ve been asking an awful lot of questions this whole time, haven’t you? Oh well, I guess it can’t be helped. After all, you’re currently stuck in pitch-black darkness. I guess it makes sense to grow anxious or scared...Fufufu~ But rest assured.”

*Rustle*

“I’ll explain the whole situation step by step, okay? First and foremost, you’re currently blindfolded, lying on top of my - Mukami Kou-kun’sーー

*Rustle*

ーー bed, you see~”

*Rustle rustle*

[01:31] “As for why I kidnapped you. Hmー There’s a few, but one of them would be because you’re a special human. ...Fufu~ Do you know what that means? It basically implies that you’re in a different league from just any other regular human out there. You might not be aware of it yourself, but to our species, your existence stands out as extraordinary.”

*Rustle*

“Actually, you know that already, don’t you? You’re being kept as a pet over at the Sakamaki manor after all.”

You protest.

“...Eh? You’re not being ‘kept’? Ah, sorry, sorry! I didn’t quite put it right, did I? I take back my words. More accurately, you’re their...prey, aren’t you?”

He pins you down.

*Thud*

[02:23] “Fufu...Ahahaha~ No need to look so dissatisfied. It’s the truth, isn’t it? Besides, that’s the second reason which made me interested in you so I dare argue it’s a good thing?”

*Creaaak*

“Hm? You want to know who I am? Didn’t I name myself earlier? You’ve got such bad memory.”

You shake your head.

[02:51] “Ah...That’s not what you meant? Ahー Gotcha. Hm...Can I spill the beans already? But I feel like Ruki-kun will give me an earful if I do and he’s a pain to deal with when he’s upset. ...Let’s see...~ Fufu...~ I’ll tell you when I feel like it, okay?”

*Creaaak*

“Anyway, I gave you an answer to your questions so happy now? More importantly, I want to know about you first. All sorts of things...~”

*Rustle*

[03:32] “We actually managed to get a hold of their weakness, so just like Ruki-kun is always saying, I should get an idea of what I’m dealing with. So to start off, I better do a little investigating to find out what exactly makes you so special...~”

*Rustle rustle*

“Fufu~ You’re shaking...My touch is still foreign to you, isn’t it? No need to be so scared though. I’m a nice guy after all.”

He pulls you close.

[04:04] “Here, I’ll stroke your head for you. ...Good girl, good girl...So stop trembling, okay?”

*Rustle*

“Hm...You’re more alert than I thought. Fufu~ You’re letting them have their way with you despite that?”

You protest again.

[04:28] “How odd...Or perhaps you’re simply feigning this cautious attitude? In that case, you’re one hell of a naughty kitten~ They say that a skillful hunter gets a kick out of going after highly alert prey and honestly, I think I may understand where they’re coming from. It’s boring when something is too easy to get. ーー I can already get my hands on pretty much everything I want through my job after all.”

*Rustle*

“...Ah! But I don’t really like how I’m implying those guys are skilled by saying that. What do you think? As the one they’re hunting for, how do you feel about them?”

You remain quiet.

[05:17] “Heeey~ Aren’t you going to answer? Giving me the silent treatment is a little mean, don’t you think? Hmー I guess it’s a little difficult of a question to start off with. In that case, let me ask you an easy one. Ah, right! How about this? ーー Does it really feel good to have them suck your blood? You know, does it make you feel like you’ve ascended to another world? Like your body is just floating mid-air~”

*Rustle*

“...No answer once again? You really are dull, geez. What will get you to talk? Should I ask you about your favorite spots? Or perhaps you really don’t care about those guys at all?”

*Rustle*

[06:12] “Ahー I’m kind of fed up with this already. I’m out here trying my best to be nice and all I get in return is the cold shoulder. What are you playing at?”

You explain.

“...You can’t say those things to someone you’ve only just met? Heh~ I see...That makes sense now that you mention it. In that case, I suppose I have to introduce myself  first.”

Track 2: Mukami Kou

He removes the blindfold.

*Rustle*

“Here. Take a cloooose look at my face. I removed your blindfold as well. See? I’m this close to you. Our lips could almost touch.”

You look straight at him.

[00:19] “...Fufu~ Can you see me? I guess I should say ‘nice to meet you’? I’m sorry for suddenly abducting you like that earlier~ However, it would have been difficult to take you away otherwise. I guess you could say it was the optimal timing? It really was my one chance.

...Say, are you the type who doesn’t watch television very often? Well, I guess you don’t strike me as a girl who would.”

You tilt your head to the side.

“Ah, no, I’m just talking to myself. I just figured that you’d probably recognize me if you watched TV every now and then. Not that it matters though.”

*Rustle*

[00:57] “But really, things went surprisingly well if I may say so myself. I’m sure those guys are frantically looking around for you right about now. After all, their precious little treat was snatched away from right underneath their nose, haha~! Fufu...Ahahaha! Just remembering those foolish expressions on their faces makes me laugh.”

*Rustle rustle*

“And I’m going to dig into their precious meal soon...Haah...Somehow just being this close to you makes my breath hitch.”

*Rustle*

“Is this what you’re capable of? Say, how come you’re this delicious?”

*Sniff sniff*

“...You smell amazing. What kind of scent is this? Hm...~”

Kou takes a deep breath.

[01:55] “I can’t get enough of it...I wonder where it’s coming from?”

*Sniff sniff*

“Not here...”

*Rustle*

“Then here maybe?”

*Sniff*

“I can’t quite tell through your clothes...”

*Rustle rustle*

“Why not take them off? It’s not like you need them, do you? ...Come on, hurry. The scent on the fabric is throwing me off.”

*Rustle*

“Come on, go ahead!”

You hesitate.

[02:29] “...Hurry up, will you? You might not guess it, but I’m not the most patient guy around. If you refuse to take them off yourself...You’re not going to have a good time.”

You refuse.

“...Tsk. Ahー What a fucking drag! Do you think I’m a joke or something? Do you have any idea what’ll happen if you oppose me like that?”

*Creaaak*

“Ugh...”

*Thud*

“I’ve gotten a little irritated you see. And once that happens, everything starts to annoy me. So that look you’re giving me...Ahaha...It pisses me off.”

*Rustle*

[03:12] “...I’m going to gauge out those eyes of yours, for real. I happen to kind of like that sorta stuff.”

You start taking off your clothes.

“...Huh? You’re gonna strip? Ahー So you’ve chosen to obey? How boring. I just had so many good ideas of things to do to you.”

*Rustle rustle*

“Anyway, if you’re just gonna bend to someone’s will in the end anyway, wouldn’t it be better to simply listen from the very start? Or did you want me to snap at you?”

You shake your head.

“Ah, I see! Right! You’re that kind of girl, aren’t you? You wanted me to lose my temper...so I’d treat you horribly, right? Fufu~ What an M-neko-chan you are~”

You seem confused by the nickname.

[04:03] “Hm? You want to know what ‘M-neko’ means? Isn’t that obvious? You’re more stupid than I thought. The ‘M’ is the same one as in ‘Do-M’, duh! Masochists, you know? You’re the type of girl who gets a kick out of the pain, aren’t you?”

*Creaaak*

“With that kind of personality, I can understand why you’d enjoy spending time with those guys. We’re capable of pleasing you in ways a regular human never could after all. Fufu...~ Is it true the pain is addictive?”

You try and explain.

[04:45] “When you put it like that, I almost want to turn into a human girl for one day and have a bunch of Vampires feast upon my blood~ Well, of course, I much prefer being the one doing the sucking. ...Aah, I was told this as well. Apparently having your blood sucked feels like strong currents of electricity running through your entire body, is that true? How nice~ I’m envious~”

You frown.

“That being said, I’d rather not get bitten myself. I’d love to get a taste of that pleasure, but I’d rather die than let some other Vampire pierce me with his fangs. Heh~ ...Ah, oh no, I’ve been rambling...”

*Rustle*

[05:39] “Come on, take those clothes off. I’ll figure out where this delicious scent is coming from first. You’re hiding it underneath that dull (1) outfit of yours, aren’t you? ーー Your precious secret~”

You start to take off the rest of your clothes.

“Fufu...Exactly~ You’ve got to show me your meek side like that, or else I might just poke your eyes out~”

You tell him you’re done.

[06:08] “...Eh? You took them off? Now don’t be ridiculous. When I say ‘strip’, I obviously meant everything, right? You move your jacket to the side a little and call that ‘taking off your clothes’? Heeh...You really must be making fun of me, aren’t you? ...Listen, I hate being ridiculed more than anything...There are many girls in this world who would kill to be in this kind of situation with me, you know? Yet here you are, living that dream...”

*Rustle*

“Ah, right! You’re just pretending to be embarrassed but you’re actually happy, aren’t you?”

*Rustle*

“Oh! Or perhaps...You want me to rip you apart? I would never resort to such violent actions though. I mean, there’s nothing fun about tearing apart someone who won’t even scream from the pain, is there? Fufu...~”

ーー TO BE CONTINUED ーー

Translation notes

(1) More specifically, he describes her clothes as lacking even the faintest hint of sexiness.

[miladycasserole]

⚠️ Spoilers Warning for the Bad Batch ⚠️

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Alright this one might be brief because I watched it last night at 1 am and now it is 6 so I'm just going off what I remember

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Another masterpiece this week just as the episodes have been every week. Dave really knows how to make a good show

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The fact that Crosshair referred to them as Clone Force 99 with literally no emotion in his voice 😭

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Wrecker teaching Omega how to disarm a b*mb and then doing the little scare prank thing 🥺😂

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Just the way that the whole Bad Batch is you can tell that they are literally brothers by how they talk with and about each other 🥺

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Wrecker kissing the explosive 😂

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Echo and Hunter's disagreement on who they are and where they stand and how Echo wishes they went with Rex

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Just the way that Hunter (and the rest of the Bad Batch) talked to Crosshair 😭🥺

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And the fact that they were trying to get through to him and couldn't. Them bringing up the inhibitor chip and Omega bringing up the moment they shared in the holding cell 🥺😭

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When Hunter saved Tech from falling 🥺😭

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The way Crosshair said "Try it again, Hunter!" 😭 (That might not be the exact line but it's what I'm pretty sure he said)

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Poor Crosshair getting burned the way he did 🥺🥺 I mean I know he's the bad guy but still

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Cad freakin' Bane! Of all people I was not expecting him to show up and Dave Filoni is a genius

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When Bane shot Hunter I was livid but also sobbing. 😭 And then the fact that he took Omega. 😭 I was happy to see Bane for 5 seconds and then that ended 😭😂

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The fact that (and this happens every week) I can go from saying "Filoni is a genius!" to five minutes later cursing his name to the sky 😂

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Just the scene when Hunter was waking up *chef kiss* beautiful 😭 and the way that they were all so worried about him but Wrecker's first question was asking where Omega was 😭

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The fact that Hunter was more worried about Omega rather than if he was okay or not 🥺

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Filoni is going to destroy me and I don't know if I can take this much longer 😭😅 I am way too worried about Omega and the rest of the Bad Batch 😂

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Anyway this was my weekly ramble and I'm so excited (and nervous) for next weeks episode haha

[waynedunlaptheorgandonor]

caryl first date headcanon

i wrote a stream of consciousness caryl headcanon i was thinking about when i couldn’t sleep last night. no i did not proofread it. yes it is rambling nonsense. yes you can read it if you want: 

so i genuinely don’t know what the timeline for canon is gonna be now that we got bottle episodes, s11, and the spin-off, but just for a moment let us pretend that it happens during the bottle episodes and then we have all of s11 to watch caryl trying to figure out how to navigate a relationship with each other

cuz like, they gon fuck right away, bc things are gonna get heated, and tensions are gonna be high, and they’re gonna snap like a trip wire and fucking ravish each other, that’s without question

so the first little while of their relationship will be mostly getting intimately familiar with each other’s bodies down to every last freckle

but once they’ve simmered down some they’re gonna need to address the “oh shit, wait, how does a relationship work?” problem

cue: caryl’s first date

it’ll take place in commonwealth, and i’ve never read the comics and i know jack all about it outside of what i’ve skimmed, but we’re gonna ignore that for the sake of my fun post

i know enough about it to know that there are definitely places to have a date

daryl knows this too, tho he doesn’t rly think about it right away. at first he’s more confused and sort of standoffish about the whole place, bc he was always a forest-dweller even before the apocalypse, so seeing this new metropolis-like place after years of living like a gd pioneer is gonna throw him way off kilter

right up until he’s chillin’ with judith and she’s talking about how she’s excited to see her first concert, and they have restaurants, and things she’s only ever read about, and then out of nowhere she’ll pull out, “are you gonna take aunt carol on a date?” 

and daryl will stare at her

and she’ll be like “rosita was telling me about how father gabriel took her on a real date and how nice it was. you should do that for aunt carol” 

and daryl will stare at her

and then will hastily change the subject (she’ll see right through him, ofc, but she’ll let it slide)

but the thought will stick with him, and suddenly he’s looking at the schedule of upcoming concerts and plays and wondering if carol would care about any of it. does she like shakespeare? the most experience he would have had with shakespeare was ripping out a couple pages of his school copy of romeo and juliet to use to light some firewood

but maybe she’s into it???

eventually he’ll reach the inevitable conclusion that the only way this is going to work is if he actually asks her to go on a date with him, which should be easy, right? like, he was ball’s deep inside her last night and told her good morning by putting his face between his legs, so surely asking someone on a date is simple

it will not be simple

bc yeah, they fuck all the time, and obviously they’re head-over-heels in love with each other, they’re each other’s soulmates, yada yada, but also daryl’s extremely emotionally repressed and has the romance skills of a fifteen year old having his mom drive him and his date to his first homecoming dance, only worse bc he never even went to any school dances

but after Dwelling On It for ages he’ll finally get fed up with himself and will vow to stop being a pussy. he’ll ask her before the day’s over or he’ll shoot a bolt into his own foot, ok, no more excuses

so the whole day he’s jittery af

you’d think he’s trying to pop the question, but all he wants to do is go eat dinner with carol and then watch some people recite lines from a play written hundreds of years ago, like, what is his Deal(tm)??? 

(his deal is, ofc, that he waited so long to have her, and now every new thing feels tenuous, bc he’d rather die than lose her, and sure she knows him better than anyone, but never in this context, and plus her last dude basically bled passion and romance no matter how obnoxious, and what if she realizes just how fucking clueless he is and decides she doesn’t really want to be with a middle-aged man who still gets tongue-tied around a pretty girl?)

(but also she deserves a gd date, alright? she deserves it, and so he’s going to give it to her, even if going face-to-face with a walker horde is less intimidating)

carol notices something’s off with him right away, but she waits until after dinner, when the kids have gone to their rooms and the two of them are alone washing dishes to ask, “hey, so what the fuck?” 

and daryl will be like, k, it’s now or never

and he will 100% make a fool of himself by stumbling alllll over his words, like, “nothin’s wrong, i’m fine, everythin’s real fine, i was just wonderin’ if mb you’d wanna, y’know, i dunno, they got all these shows and shit that we ain’t had in forever and i didn’t know if mb you’d wanna go see one? and mb get some food? with me, i mean. like, together. like i’d take you there and we could do those things, like a, you know, a date. but it’s cool if not, no worries, i get it if it’s not your thing, but i just thought i’d ask, but no, you’re right, it’s stupid, forget i said anythin’, hey look at the time, well i’m beat, gonna go to sleep now, goodbye”

and carol will go, “hold up”

and she’ll take daryl by the wrist before he can flee the room (bc he definitely intends to), and pulls him close and kisses him all sweet, and she’s gotta stand on her tiptoes to do it bc she’s in a pair of knit socks and he’s got his boots on so there’s more of a height difference than usual, and after she’s successfully managed to keep daryl from falling straight into a panic spiral, she’ll whisper, “i’d love to, let’s go this weekend”

and then she’ll just turn back to doing dishes without another word on the matter 

(bc, as previously stated, she knows daryl better than anyone, and she knows exactly what all his insecurities are and how much it must have taken him to ask her that, and so she’s not gonna harp on it or tease him)

(daryl recognizes this and loves her desperately for it)

the actual date is way easier than daryl expected

bc he spent all this time hyping it up, but when it comes right down to it, he just gets to spend a night with carol where they don’t have the kids to worry about, or any council business, and they just get to enjoy each other’s company

she even dressed up a little for him, which was unnecessary, but he most certainly appreciates it and can’t wait to tear the outfit off of her later

(it does make him regret the fact that he’s only had one pair of pants for the past ten years, but she doesn’t seem to mind)

they end up seeing a shakespeare play

daryl understands like 2% at best, but carol holds his hand and rests her head on his shoulder the whole time, and apparently it’s a comedy bc she laughs a lot, and that alone makes it worth it

they fuck like crazy when they get home, obviously

but it’s different than it had been previously, bc now their “togetherness” seems more solidified

like, they’re officially a “couple” now

like the type of couple that gets a babysitter for the night so they can go to the apocalyptic version of dinner and a movie together and then have sex and then fall asleep right afterwards bc they’re domestic af

and like, deep down both of them knows that this isn’t the life that they’re meant to live in forever, a la commonwealth/domestic bliss, and he wasn’t kidding when he told her new mexico was still out there, and he can feel a shift coming sooner rather than later

but he also knows they’ll be together when it happens, and they’ll figure out their own version of “date night” when they’re out exploring

but for now he’s content to do it the old fashioned way, though

when she falls asleep on his chest that night he rubs her back and kisses the top of her head, and he’s already planning their next night out

he might pick a show with modern english, though

but it’s not required

just so long as they’re together

the end 

[paradise-creator]

drop genshin!helios and scara hcs n stuff mb? {i haven't met him yet i just know he has a cool hat} or genshin!helios lore mayhap? idk i just wanna hear u ramble for a bit

Leting me ramble is a vv bad idea BUT LET’S GO :DD 

And yes Scara is also known as the fandango man <33

ANYWAYS My rambles are under the cut <33

SO Helios, more commonly known as Angel now, was apart of the adepti group that pledged to protect Liyue. He is half human and half adepti who is around 900-1000 ish in present time. The thing is, he never really knew much about his illuminated beast part of him. Seemingly as they was raised as human by their mother. All she knew is that there were some it had something to do with snakes. As evident with her fangs and some white scales found scattered around.  Their father was often away to fulfill his contract with Morax at that time. She was born in Mondstadt along with her little sister. 

She wasn’t apart of the Yakshas however she did protect Liyue for most of her life. She learned her fighting skills through Xiao and Zhongli. Though, she never fully mastered the pole arm, she was able to learn swordsmanship first. She wasn’t as good as her peers until she took possession of a catalyst.  However throughout the years, she never thoroughly enjoyed her job. It was her duty and was bound by a contract. Even bound to her contract, she found herself enjoying company of some kids. Who she’ll entertain with stories from her long life. 

So, she asked Morax for a small break which Morax agreed to. She was not to return to her duties for 2 and a half years, per what they agreed. In those two years she found more about herself. This was the time where she struggled to fit in. After all, she was half-illuminated beast. There are barely anyone like her. Even if Ganyu, who signed a contract too, and Yanfei, who didn't,  were around, she never really fit in. As they were really focused on their duty while she was confused. 

Though, he found himself when he came to Inazuma for the first time. He had to sneak in and was successful with his attempt. There they were ambushed by some fatui, who had mistaken them for their target. But when he was taken to The Tsaritsa, they recognized each other. Even with her frozen heart, The Tsaritsa  treated her with kindness. Why? Well, they knew each other personally! 

Basically the Tsaritsa asked him to join. After all, having a half-illuminated beast in her rank would be advantageous. Helios agreed on a few conditions. 

1. was that his little sister would be kept safe and will not be lumped into fatui business. 

2. he would be free to roam 

3. She won’t fully join the Fatui until the children they have been taking care off are well 

and 4. All her past, them as an adepti, would be a separate being from who they were 

And of course The Tsaritsa approved <33 

Hehehehehe Yeah I went overboard sjhdzgfxhdj

[mulletcal]

when did you first know? -- a calum hood one shot

a/n: okay so i was hit with inspo for this like 8 hours ago and here we are.  it’s the origin story for cal & mama from my twin universe, but you don’t need to have read those to know what’s going on here!! pls enjoy

words:  3.9k

warnings: cavity inducing fluff mb???

-------------

Soulmate was always a word that Calum heard, and while he believed that they existed, he was never certain that a soulmate would be something he’d find in his lifetime.  He saw his friends pair off with their respective partners, and it warmed his heart to see the people he loved so happy.  Calum grew content with the fact that he was meant for platonic soulmates, already having found those in his best friends.

The fans never let the idea go that Calum was preparing for his soulmate though - citing his quitting smoking, and in general cleaning up his act as the source.  That was never consciously what Calum was doing though, rather just choosing to better himself for himself.  

It was a Tuesday when he first met her - the sky was clear and the moon full, the air was warm, and he was surrounded by his best friends as they shared stories from their past.  Why Michael had decided to have a party on a Tuesday, he’d never know; but he knew that he would one day need to thank the man. 

Andy had brought her along, saying how she was an old friend from his hometown who just moved to L.A. and had zero friends there other than him.  Maybe it would be Andy he’d need to thank - in all the years he’d been alive, he had never met someone so beautiful.  The night carried on in similar fashion to previous nights, most of them crashing in various rooms in Michael’s house rather than heading home.  She went home, though, without Calum being able to say goodbye, or get her number - she was gone.

For days thoughts of her clouded his mind; the sound of her voice, her laugh, how she danced with his friends as if she’d known them for years.  It tugged at his heart how well she fit in with them, and he wished he knew her well enough to invite her along to things they had plans for.

In a vague attempt to rid his mind of her, he thought he’d distract himself with the one thing that always seemed to cheer him up - dogs.  Duke enjoyed wandering the dog park, even if he didn’t interact much with other dogs, Calum was always there to toss a ball or two for his old baby. 

Pressing a kiss to the side of Duke’s head, he set him down onto the grass and took his leash in his hand, at least till they got away from the busy parking lot.  Letting him begin to sniff around, Calum’s eyes scanned around the park - it wasn’t a particular busy day for a Friday, they may be able to have a wider range for Duke to roam.

He froze, though, when he saw an oddly familiar face underneath a nearby tree - it was her.  This had to be some form of serendipity, right?  There was no way she knew he would be there, at that time, on that day, so maybe this was his chance.

Calum’s feet took over before he got much of a chance to overthink it, stopping when he and Duke reached a few feet away, “Hey, didn’t expect to see you here!” Oof, lame line.  He could’ve done better than that, truly.

She looked up, lifting the sunglasses off of her head as she met his eyes, a bright smile spreading across her lips, “Calum, hey! How are yo- Is this your dog?” Her eyes were wide as she looked at Duke, whose head was cocked to the side as his dad interacted with this woman he never met.

“It is, his name’s Duke.  He’s wary of people, so maybe just approach with caution.  It’s not his fault, he’s old and grumpy.  I feel as though he should be back at home readin’ the dailies.” Calum was rambling, and he knew it - but his comment made her laugh, so it counted as a win to him.

“Me too man, you have no idea,” She shook her head as she spoke to Duke, as if he could understand her.  She held out her hand and Calum waited with baited breath while his dog gave it a sniff, usually Duke would huff and walk away from the offending person - but after what felt like an eternity, Duke’s tail began to wag as he looked at her expectantly.

“That absolutely never happens,” Calum stated, stunned; and the responding smile that he got was brighter than the sun that was high in the sky that day.  “D’you wanna come toss a ball for ‘im?  He seems to like you,” While Calum had been deep in his own thoughts, Duke had taken to putting his front paws on her legs so she could have better access to behind his ears.

“Really? Are you sure? I don’t want to intrude on a quiet day at the dog park.”

“It seems as though if anything, we’re intruding on you,” Calum motioned to the tablet and pen beside her and she responded with a wave of her hand, standing up to dust off her pants.

“Thinkin’ bout it now, I was very likely sitting in dog pee, wasn’t I?” She pouted, continuing to brush off the back of her pants.  Gathering her things, she slid them into her bag before turning to the pair, “We ready boys?”

The rest of Calum’s afternoon was spent exchanging stories of their pasts, and how they came to be where they were today.  He found out that she was a graphic designer, working on animation as well, and she moved to L.A. because she was offered an amazing job she couldn’t turn down.  The more he learned about her, the more infatuated he became; and when his phone went off to remind him of a time slot they had at the studio.

If Calum didn’t act now, he knew he’d miss his chance - he could sense it deep down that the universe had given him the perfect opportunity and he couldn’t waste it.

“Hey, d’you have plans for tomorrow night?” Tomorrow night? What an incredible way to sound desperate.

“I don’t actually, I was supposed to go for coffee with Andy but something came up!” She grinned, adjusting the bag on her shoulder, “Why what’s up?”

“Would you want to go out tomorrow? On a date, maybe?” Calum swallowed thickly, running his fingers through his hair, avoiding any and all eye contact with her.

“I’d love to, actually.”

Calum’s heart soared, breaking into a toothy grin that brought out the crinkles by his eyes.  She said yes, and it wasn’t just him imagining things.  He tried to prevent his hands from shaking while they exchanged phones and phone numbers, the promise of the next day hanging from their lips when they departed.

***

Calum had been pacing through his house for the last hour, the anticipation leading him to sweat through the first shirt he had picked for the night.  He couldn’t remember the last time he had been so nervous for something, even crowds of people watching them perform.

He could be vulnerable, he could be himself, but what if she rejected him? What if he opened a door as an insight to himself, and once he did he couldn’t close it again?

The drive to her apartment was shorter than he would have liked.  Then again, maybe he shouldn’t have been left alone with his thoughts for too much longer or he may have backed out.

Calum wanted to be a gentleman, but the whole process of buzzing up to her apartment and her waiting at her door to be picked up seemed a little awkward - so instead he waited by the passenger side door of his car, a small bouquet of wildflowers in hand.  He almost started to pace again while he waited, but then his eyes landed on her.

Her silk, navy blue dress swayed as she walked towards him, tucking her keys and phone into her purse but her eyes never left Calum’s.  He couldn’t help to notice that the dress hugged her upper half in all the best ways, flaring out to stop just above her knees.

“Hi,” She breathed, standing up on her tippy toes to press a gentle kiss to his cheek. 

A spark radiated from Calum’s cheek, causing goosebumps to raise on his skin, “You look absolutely stunning,” he spoke softly, extending the flowers to her.  “These are for you.”

The expression on her face softened ever so slightly when she saw the flowers, a smile present on her lips while she thanked him with another kiss to his cheek.  Calum opened the car door for her, assuring she was in before rounding to the other side.

Conversation flowed easily between the two, and Calum’s cheeks were beginning to ache from the amount he was smiling- he genuinely couldn’t remember the last time he ached because he was so happy.  It continued well through dinner, her even offering up a forkful to him of her meal.

Once dinner was finished, Calum paid and escorted her again out to his car, grabbing the door even though she insisted she was fine before they headed to the second part of their date.  This part was met with confusion from her, a teasing smile quirking at her lips.

“Ah, I see.  The infamous Calum Hood shows a gal a good time, and then takes her out to the beach late at night to kill her, is it?” She asked, raising an eyebrow at him.

It wasn’t an entirely unfair assumption - the only light illuminating the road ahead was his own headlights, and those of the occasional car that would pass by.  She had guessed right about the beach, though, and Calum faked an incredulous gasp.

“How could you think I’m a murderer? I know we’ve been driving down a dark road for half an hour, but that’s irrelevant to the matter.”

“I’ll have you know I’ve sent Andy my location, in case you do choose to kill me.  At the very least he could come locate my body.” She was biting her tongue to keep from laughing, but ultimately failed and she squeezed Calum’s hand in an attempt to let him know she was kidding - but also possibly a poorly veiled attempt at wanting to hold his hand.

Thankfully, Calum took the hint and laced their fingers together, bringing their joined hands up to his lips, grazing against the back of hers.  He heard her breath stop, and he quickly glanced at her with a hint of a smile.

The rest of the drive was silent, only the faint sound of Louis Armstrong playing in the background.  The lights of their destination came into view, and Calum chewed on his lower lip while he tried to gauge her reaction.  It would be impossible to tell what it was just from a glance, but the smile that came across her face was enough for Calum.

While the sound of Louis Armstrong was now gone, the sounds of a vibrant jazz band filled her ears, and her smile went from soft to ear to ear within seconds.

“What is this, Cal?” She asked softly, reaching for his hand when he had met her at the front of the car. 

The first thought at the forefront of his mind was how he could get used to the feeling of her hand in his, but the next thought he had was that he should probably answer her question. “Well…” He began, tugging her hand gently so she could follow, “There’s this jazz band I’ve come across that plays here once a month and I love to come and watch them.  They’ve even let me play for them a handful of times.”

Her eyes scanned the people, wide with wonder as she did so.  She saw couples of all ages milling about, and much to her delight some were dancing.  You often heard about things like this, but she never could have dreamed that this beautiful man standing beside her would have taken her here.

“Wanna dance, doll?” Calum asked, looking down at her expectantly, giggling softly at how quickly her gaze snapped up to him.

He didn’t need to say anymore to her before he was dragged out to the ‘dance floor’, proceeding to sway and spin to the music.

After a few songs, they decided to take a break, sitting down at a table beside this elderly couple Calum appeared to know, excusing himself to go get you both a drink.

“You don’t see that often, do ya Ruby?” The man spoke up, clearly trying to the attention of his wife, as well as the young lady that sat beside them.

“What’s that darlin’?” The woman, Ruby, said to the man, leaning her chin onto her hand.

“Calum seems to have brought a special lady with him tonight.  Don’t think he’s ever done that before.”

Now he had her attention, turning her head to look at Ruby and her husband, chewing on her lip before she asked, “He hasn’t?”

The couple shook their head practically in unison, knowing smiles on their lips, “He must really care about you.”

It took her off guard when Calum came back, setting down waters for them.  Sipping it absentmindedly while their words echoed through her head.  If Calum truly had never brought anyone there before her, this place must have been special to him; and what lead him to want to bring her there? Her chest was warm with the implication that she, too, could be special to Calum in the same way this place was.

Not much longer later, they made their decision to leave.  She had been making her rounds, getting to know the regulars of the area, and them doing the same for her.  It didn’t take her very long to be invited back by the regulars, all of them kissing her and Calum’s cheeks before they finally departed.

Arriving back at her apartment, there was a sense of hesitation in the air, neither of them wanting their night to end.  It needed to though, if only to let the night continue on and they could venture into the future together.

“Walk me to my door?” She asked, glancing over at him with a hopeful expression in her eyes.

“It would be my pleasure,” He answered honestly, hopping out of the drivers side, quickly making his way to her side to offer his hand to her.

The nerves from earlier returned while they made the short trek upstairs to her apartment.  Calum knew before he reached the door that he wanted to kiss her, but the thought of it being the typical awkward first date kiss hurt his chest while it constricted in panic.

He could tell she was nervous too when he saw her fumble with her keys, and it made him breathe a little easier.  When they stopped in front of her door, she spun around to face him, stumbling back despite the lack of alcohol either of them drank that night.

“I had an amazing time,” She began, licking her lips when she finally met his eyes.  “I’d love to do it again sometime, if you’d like.”

“Trust me, I’d like nothing more.” Oh, so he was back to desperate, that’s good. 

“Good, good…” Her words died in her throat when Calum stepped closer to her, bringing his hand up to brush against her cheek.  Their eyes seemed to take turns glancing from their lips, back to each others eyes - a wordless request for a kiss.  It was just a matter of who would move first.

Calum couldn’t wait any longer, the anticipation enough to kill him, so he closed the gap, capturing her lips in the most breathtaking kiss she had ever received.  His lips were so gentle and soft against hers, and she couldn’t help but to tangled her fingers in the front of his shirt, desperate to have him closer.

A long moment later, they pulled apart, both slightly gasping for air and sharing breathless giggles.

“Alright, so I’ll talk to you later then?” Calum teased, his fingers still dancing along her waist, enjoying the feeling of the soft silk under his touch.

“You’d fucking better honestly.”

With that half threat, they shared one more kiss before she slipped inside, pressing her back against the door with her hand against her head.  The whole night had been a whirlwind, and it was difficult to believe that it was her real life - every series of events felt movie like, and it was the last thing she expected when she moved to the City of Angels.

Calum had begun the walk back to his car, waiting until he was fully inside before he rested his head against the steering wheel and laughing softly to himself.  He had never felt such a strong connection to anyone before, his heart was racing at the fact that maybe he had just met his soulmate.

Taking his phone out of his pocket for the first time that night, he noticed the group chat was blowing up with questions of his date, shaking his head before he sent a simple reply:

[9:54pm]: She’s perfect. I’m gonna marry her.

Once that was sent, he silenced his phone again and headed home, proceeding to write the same words down in his journal with a date, almost as a manifestation of his future.

***

Their relationship only blossomed from there - In ways they were completely inseparable, but both knew the times when to step back, letting one another have alone time, or time with their friends.

It made the boys so happy to see their best friend completely and totally in love, excited that he had met someone who matched him on different levels.  It was rare to see them argue, and when they did, it was resolved almost as quickly as an issue came up - it was almost then that everyone realized that the two really were meant to be together, knowing how much Calum despised conflict.

At the year and a half mark, Calum began to plan his proposal.  Their friends demanded to be in on it, but being in on it revealed the only thing he ever kept from his friends - the one thing that was just for them. 

In the end, it was worth showing them if it meant she said yes to him, and the promise of their future together was more set in stone.

When the day of the proposal finally arrived, Calum was a nervous wreck all day - he had to call Andy to help get her out of the house so he could panic in private.  Ashton showed up at one point in the day so someone could force him into the shower, so he’d be ready for the night.

Calum lost count of how many times he was told to relax by his friends via text, after his shower Ashton was long since gone, not wanting to be there when she got home in an attempt to not give away the surprise - as if him being there was anything out of the ordinary.

When she arrived back home, she got ready for their typical once a month Saturday night date, still seemingly unaware about what was in store for the night.  It put Calum at ease a little, to see her go through her routine of getting ready without the knowledge that he was going to ask her to spend the rest of her life with him.

“Ready baby?” She asked softly, smoothing out her skirt, cocking her head to the side while she waited for an answer.

“Yeah, love, let’s go,” Calum smiled, lacing his fingers with hers as they headed out to their destination.

The familiar lights were a welcome sight to Calum, further easing his nerves for the night.  It helped knowing that everyone that was there loved them, and only wanting what was best for them.  When he wrapped his arm around her waist, she shivered slightly and curled into him.

“We gonna dance, angel?” Calum whispered, his lips lingering near her ear, leading her to the dance floor regardless.  His eyes scanned the room, not giving her much time to look around before he pulled her close to him.  

Over her head, he saw Luke getting into position behind the mic, smiling at Calum. ‘Dream a Little Dream of Me’ by Louis Armstrong began to play, Calum continuing to move her to the music with him until Luke began singing.

‘Stars shining bright above you

Night breezes seem to whisper "I love you"

Birds singing in the sycamore trees

Dream a little dream of me…’

The moment she recognized the familiar voice, she spun around, a bright smile on her face.  She started to suspect something was up, especially considering that at any given chance, Calum would never be able to turn down playing with his best friends.  He wrapped his arms around her from behind, swaying from side to side as she watched the boys play the song. 

As it came to an end, Calum felt her take a deep breath before turning to face him, suspecting what was about to happen.

Calum took his arms from around her, rubbing his hands on his pants to wipe the sweat that was forming, taking the small box from his pocket.  “I know you can kind of guess what I’m about to say, you’re too smart for your own good - but at least I managed to keep this a surprise this far.  Anyways… Before I met you, I wasn’t quite sure that a soulmate existed out there for me.  I watched my friends pair off and meet their amazing significant others, leaving just me usually.  But then you came, and my world turned upside down.  I didn’t know what to do with myself, but I knew I had to be near you.  You simultaneously stole the air from my lungs, but breathed a new life into me I didn’t know I was capable of. I’ve become a better man because of you, and for you. So, I need to ask…” He finally got down on one knee, opening the ring box with tears in his eyes, “Will you marry me?”

She couldn’t contain the tears streaming down her cheeks any longer, nodding fervently as she dipped down to his level to kiss him, nearly knocking him over, “A million times yes. In every universe, in every lifetime, yes.”

She hadn’t realized that all their close friends and family were there, and it caused more tears to flow when she saw them.  Never in her life had she felt more loved, and it was all thanks to the beautiful boy who brought her to a jazz bar on the beach.

Despite having a lot of friends and family, they kept their wedding small.  They wanted it to be intimate and sweet, and everything about it spoke to who they were as people, and it represented their relationship perfectly.  Growing up, she never had brothers, but as she swayed with Michael to the song playing, she couldn’t resist the urge to rest her head on his shoulder and tell him how they’re all the brothers she’s always wanted.

Later in the night, the newly wedded couple decided to exchange gifts.  Hers was a set of shadow boxes, with pressed and dried flowers from their first date that she had kept for the now almost three years.  His gift to her was a simple frame, but in it was the paper he wrote after their first date.

“Baby, this isn’t the day of our first date.”

“You’re absolutely right, my love, it’s the day I realized I wanted to marry you.”

tag list: @cals-wildflower​ @talkfastromance4​ @softbabiestan​ @roseycal​ @calum-uncrowned​ @boyfriend-cal​ @wildflowerirwin​ @irwindoll​ @gosh-im-short​ @atlcalm​ @thesubtweeter​ @heavenisapeach​ @ridingcthood​ @loveroflrh​ @wokeupinjapanisabop​

[theres-no-protocol-for-this]

Restaurant Snake

Part III of an alternate universe fanfic loosely based on the Murderbot Diaries. The guardian is kind of MB. Sort of.

Also available on AO3 (in chronological order).

Several hours later, the alarm on my phone went off, so I dragged myself out of bed and got dressed. Andre was still dutifully guarding the front door when I came upstairs, for at least some definition of guarding. I'm not sure what idiot would try to rob a building that housed monsters, but here we are.

"You heading somewhere?" the bastard drawled. 

No, just here to spend time with your charming personality, I thought. "My clients requested a meeting."

"Don't cause any trouble." Andre liked to remind people of the rules. "Be back by curfew."

I gave him a mocking salute and went to meet the investigative team. All I knew about them at that point was that they were my clients and had signed a multi-month contract with the department. They got access to the Archives in exchange for banishing some of the monsters they came across, and I was supposed to help keep them safe. 

They were already at the restaurant and seated by the time I arrived. It was one of those fancy, sit-down places that served mouthwatering food on cute, little dishes. Under any other circumstances, it wasn't an establishment affordable to a were-creature. 

I got plenty of amused and puzzled glances from patrons and staff when I walked inside. Everyone else was dressed in business casual, and here I was in ripped jeans and some punk-band shirt that came from a thrift store. I glared at the receptionist, who asked me if my party was already here.

I almost turned and left when Ratthi spotted me, and then it was too late to disappear. I came over and sat down and tried to behave like a civilized person. The whole situation felt like a terrible idea and was getting worse by the second. 

"Good evening," Dr. Mensah said. "Thank you for meeting with us. I imagine you don't normally take your work home."

"Hello."

Staring at the tablecloth helped with the panic a little. I reached out with what might loosely be termed magic and let it sink into the floor. Were-creatures have some magical abilities, usually a form of wild magic. We're stupidly unpredictable and dangerous because of it. 

When I didn't volunteer anything else, Pin-Lee said, "We wanted to make sure you were OK, for one. And we wanted to consult with you on a couple of things."

"Yeah, we were worried," Arada confirmed, "because you got hurt."

A waiter brought over a menu and placed it on the table in front of me. He smelled like mold inside an old cellar, but when I glanced up at him, he looked normal enough—some short dude in a tie with dark circles under his eyes. 

"I'm fine." I have these two words down!

It was a stupid conversation, and I had nothing to contribute. I really should've just shut my mouth, ordered something from the ridiculous menu, picked at it, and let the investigators ramble. It's a basic survival strategy, as far as I'm concerned.

Instead, I blurted out, "I don't like it here," because it was far too much light and cutlery, and they were friendly people, and they shouldn't have to deal with a werewolf.

"Have we done something wrong?" Mensah asked quietly. 

I opened my mouth to tell her that they were nice and I didn't belong here when a loud crash echoed through the entire restaurant. The smell of mold permeated the air, followed by screams.

My magic alerted me to the presence of something large and dark somewhere in the back. Whatever it was slithered through the kitchen and then out into the dining room. It looked like some cross between a snake and a swamp monster, complete with moss that grew across its limbs and chest.

"What the hell is that?" Gurathin asked, looking at me.

"How the fuck should I know?" I retorted. 

The creature growled at the nearest patron, grabbed one in two of its six arms, and started gnawing on the man. Its jaw dislocated when its mouth opened, and everything about that looked wrong.

I pushed back my chair and grabbed the nearest knife, one of those stupid butter knives that would do absolutely nothing against the monster's scaly skin. 

"Guardian, wait!" Mensah also got up and lightning arced between her outstretched fingers.

"Don't get too close to it," I warned them and then lunged at the asshole.

Step one: get the squishy human out of its jaws. 

The injured man was screaming, which up close, sounded painfully loud. My hearing is better than most humans, so ear-splitting noises hurt. I stabbed the monster's right eye with my butter knife. It screeched and let the human go, so I grabbed him with both hands and yanked him as far away as I could, dodging arms in the meantime. 

"Over here!" Pin-Lee was pointing where she and some of the bystanders were hiding behind a tipped-over table. 

I placed the bleeding human on the ground.

"It got you." She was pointing at a new cut on my arm.

"It's fine." 

There was no step two.

I got back up, grabbed another knife, and went for the obnoxious magical snake again. The monster wasn't happy to see me, and it batted at me hard enough to send me flying into a table. I landed with a sickening crash, but meh, that's not enough to stop a guardian. 

"You'll have to do better than that," I told the monster and transformed into a wolf. 

Now, this was easier because I had all the sharp weapons I could ever want. The monster screeched again as I got a running start and lunged myself at it across half a dining room. We landed on the floor and rolled for a moment before I came out on top. The scaly bastard unhinged its jaw again and tried to bite at me, and maybe it would've done more damage, but suddenly Ratthi was standing over its head. 

The master magician pointed his wand at the creature's forehead and began chanting. I didn't know what spell he was going to use, but the bastard I was growling at sure did because it tried to grab at him. Then, Mensah shocked the monster with a burst of electrical current; it hit me, too, and I yelped.

She looked horrified, even though it had been an accident. "Sorry, Guardian."

Ratthi finished his spell, cast it, and it blasted a dime-sized hole through the creature's head. It stopped twitching and went limp. I jumped off the snake and took a few cautious steps away from the corpse. 

Not bad for a surprise attack.

Mensah came over and knelt beside me. "You don't have to change again, but stay with us, OK? We'll take care of this."

I nodded.

One of the cowering receptionists came over to talk with the humans, and sirens wailed in the distance. Anxiety reared its ugly head—I'm not supposed to get into trouble outside of a contract. If the department found out, I would be in a world of hurt.

I started to turn, so I could make a hasty escape before the cops showed up. 

But then, Mensah said something to the rest of her group, and they came over to stand beside me with me while she and Pin-Lee dealt with the officers. No one asked me any questions, and when one of the officers tried to come over, Pin-Lee deftly diverted his attention.

Ratthi whispered, "That was scary."

Overse nodded and took Arada's hand again. "And we didn't get any dinner, either."