#maybe my sister in law??

[swinging-stars-from-satellites]

trying to write this essay while maintaining at least a facade of academic objective voice is ridiculous, actually

[abbeyofcyn]

Can I get a raph giving comfort for krang donnie

Back scratches ok, but only with a blanket

But be careful, he might still bite when startled

[huenistar]

when i say the 2 options are kms or shifting im not joking

dont even say “u are loved!! dont give up” HO IM IN A COUNTRY THATS GETTING RID OF ABORTION AND NOW THE POLICE HAVE THE RIGHT TO SHOOT MY FATHER (a black man.) FOR SHITS AND GIGGLES. I AM NOT LOVED HERE

[bonefall]

which cats would you say are good references for bb clan gender roles? from what i parse bb goldenflower and mousefur seem to be ‘stereotypical’ mollies, and you’ve talked about dustpelt being gender non comforming as a molly-like tom.

For the ideal molly by Clan Culture standards, look no further than Speckletail. Her aggression, boldness, and dedication to her legacy at all costs are above and beyond the basic expectations of yaow-assigned warriors. Even her LEGENDARY death in defense of the camp in BB!TNP is part of that. It's hard to get more femme than Speckletail in the eyes of Clan cats!

She was a VERY traditional person. It's why her kittens are also all good examples of their genders. You clocked Golfy, but her sister Mistleclaw was also a good one (died young of plague). Lionheart is also a great example of a tom.

In fact most of the toms of that era are good examples. Lionheart, Whitestorm... and Tigerclaw most of all. Tigerclaw was perfect as far as toms are concerned.

Until it was known what he'd done to Redtail, his grace and passivity to his Clan was admired. His contributions to Clan arguments were level-headed and measured, unlike the ferocity with which he leveraged against outsiders. He was a wonderful mate to Golfy and a beloved father to Swiftpaw and Lynxkit.

Some folks ask me about Thistleclaw specifically because he's so aggressive, but he's also a decent example of a ssuf-gender cat! Defending BORDERS violently is expected, being xenophobic in the way he is was what was expected. The constant arguing with authority (Bluestar, Redtail) was not-- but his friends would say that's just THEIR problem. After all, whaddaboutsnowfur.

(Whitestorm also has opinions. But he's too mild and passive to enter this discussion.)

I feel like Oakheart is also a REALLY good example, especially after the Forget-me-nots sadly drift apart. Incredible dad, surrounded by friends, fantastic fighter. I imagine it makes it ESPECIALLY hard whenever he has to fight Bluestar because this is incredibly attractive.

(I kinda want Oakheart to accidentally take one of her lives, because they're in the middle of a battle over Sunningrocks and they're suddenly drawn into a battle SO intense and SO passionate that the entire world around them becomes a blur. And then he launches her into orbit and she falls into the swollen river. OOPS. SORRY!!!! Goddamn himbo)

Gib, or meewa-gender, is definitely the most broad. It's about wisdom, foresight, and blessedness by StarClan. There are cats who are assigned meewa at birth, but most discover it in their kithoods.

Duckfur for example has always been sharp as a tack, and when xeir eye started to drift, that was taken as a bit of a sign. They sort of "grew into it" in adulthood, after Mistystar assumed power over RiverClan and suddenly xey were being rewarded for foresight.

Blackstar is actually a FANTASTIC example, with how his lives were given one at a time and he started thinking about the future of his Clan with his bog project. Assigned meewa at birth because of his extra toe, it kinda "went away" as his kithood wasn't consistent with the gender, and now it's back.

Wisdom, intelligence, and foresight are kind of "loose" so the matching third gender is loose as well, if that makes sense.

[tathrin]

I was thinking about the weirdness of LaCE and the whole sex=soul-marriage thing again (as you do) and a thought struck me:

what if the way it works in cases of assault (or is believed to work by the elves; in this case it doesn't matter if it's actually what happens of just what they think) is that you don't end up with a full-on bond, no, but you do get bits of connection, like hooks stuck in your soul from the other person(s)?

And—if we run with the worst interpretation of the Celebrían situation—what if that's what motivates Elladan and Elrohir to be so determined to hunt down every single orc in Middle-earth?

If Celebrían left because she couldn't bear the feeling or thought or those orc-hooks in her soul (or the ptsd flashbacks and trauma that made it easy to assume the stories were true, and that's what was happening to cause her misery) and hoped that crossing the Sundering Sea would cut them off, or at least blunt them and let the scars heal...

Well, the twins know that you can't really sail back, of course they do. They know!

But Glorfindel did. And a whole host of elves came once, during the War of Wrath. So it's not that nobody has, ever. (They can look up and see their grandfather sailing in the sky every night, out of the Undying Lands. Maybe somebody could hitch a ride...?)

If they can make Middle-earth safe for her again...well, maybe she won't come home. But at least then she could, if a chance ever came to leave and cross the Sea again. She could.

And even if she doesn't, at least when they Sail*, they can tell her that they slew her nightmares, finally.

And maybe that will be enough.

[lilithofpenandbook]

I'm starting to think maybe I was right, my mum is abusive. Not very, but still abusive.

How did I get to this conclusion? Thinking about my mum's behaviour, about my reaction to her. Somehow I got to thinking about Snape, who no one sees as a victim because he doesn't back down, he still fights his abusers and keeps on fighting them. He's the one in the wrong, despite being the victim.

And that's what made me think of something my mum says any time childhood trauma is brought up in the conversation: "If you were actually afraid of me, you wouldn't be talking back to me" "Would you still be so rude to me if you were actually traumatised?" "If I had traumatised you, you'd be too scared to speak like this to me", and similar stuff.

If you were actually abused, you'd behave like an actual victim

And that just reminded me of Snape, and how he isn't seen like a victim because he's not a "perfect victim", he isn't outwardly anxious, vulnerable, or delicate, he doesn't cry when yelled at, he doesn't stutter. He's outwardly strong, he's got self control. When emotional, he's angry, he's hostile. He's rude and sarcastic, including to the people he should be afraid of. He doesn't have any of the pretty, romanticised symptoms of trauma. He has all the ugly, real symptoms. The symptoms that mask his trauma.

Like mine. To my mother's face I am loud, I am rude, I am defensive. I show no fear. It's certain things though, that scare me. Certain things that make me angry and cry. Not in front of her. She doesn't see what's not in front of her face. She's only seen one panic attack, and that I didn't call a panic attack, I just said I couldn't breathe and my dad helped calm me but I never said it was a panic attack. I've had panic attacks in college. My friends know more about my anxiety, my trauma, more than my own mother. My teachers have seen me have panic attacks in the middle of class, after I've been stuck trying to keep it together all day. My sister once saw me, when I came home from class, exhausted by trying to keep the anxiety down to the point that even with the emotions gone the pain still had me in bed for hours afterwards. Nobody with a healthy relationship with their mother does that, do they?

But I'm supposedly not abused, not a victim, because I do not act like one in the least.

Yet if Severus Snape is a victim regardless of how he presented his trauma, maybe I'm also being abused despite my apparent lack of fear towards my mum.

Maybe that's why he's my favourite character.

Because neither of us look like we're traumatized.

Okay, so the abuse I face isn't so bad, and perhaps I'm overtly sensitive to be traumatised by it, but if I'm having panic attacks because of it then there is something there, right?

[pencilofawesomeness]

TWST Expression Doodles

I got the server to give me prompts because I wanted to doodle my boys, and I like how they turned out, so here they are. They are so in need of therapy silly. They own my heart. 

I used this expression meme in case anybody is interested. 

[spocks-kaathyra]

domestic butch4butch aliens for day 5 of @startrekfemslashweek with the prompt "learning your language"

these r my ocs Cressida and Eyal :)) Eyal is Nal's little sister! read abt her family here and her mommy issues here

[theposhperyton]

What the Hell !

[wonder-worker]

"The newly widowed Elizabeth (Woodville) was exceptionally vulnerable. Several of the trustees responsible for her jointure refused to hand over the manors that were meant to sustain her in her widowhood. Moreover, her brother-in-law, Edward Grey, had seized estates that her son Thomas should have inherited from his paternal grandfather, while her mother-in-law’s new young husband, Sir John Bourchier, had prevailed on Lady Ferrers to settle her principal properties on them jointly for life, ensuring that Thomas would have to wait far longer for this inheritance too. Rivers and Scales were pardoned in July 1461 and swiftly moved into the Yorkist establishment, which perhaps explains the success of the chancery suits Elizabeth launched to regain her jointure. Her son’s inheritance proved harder to recover. By 1463, Rivers was often in (Edward IV's) company and on his council, but Elizabeth needed someone with much stronger influence over the King. She turned to a distant kinsman, William, Lord Hastings, the King’s chamberlain. Hastings drove a very hard bargain for his aid but it was probably amid these negotiations that the King’s desire for Elizabeth was kindled."

-J.L. Laynesmith, "Elizabeth Woodville: the Knight's Widow", Later Plantagenet and Wars of the Roses Consorts: Power, Influence, and Dynasty

[lovecolibri]

.

[rearranging-deck-chairs]

disappears off the face of the earth and reappears just to say hey have you guys seen this show?

[hauntingblue]

NAMI NEEDS TO GO UP THERE AND FIGHT BIG MOM I AM SO SERIOUS!!! THIS IS A BATTLE FOR THE ROMANCE DOWN TRIO!! SANJI DO NOT DARE TAKE HER SPOT!!!

[thursdayg1rl]

one of the dramas from the wedding was one of the grooms cousins (on the other side not mine) just not wearing the clothes we had made for her specifically

[le-trash-prince]

my sister is on a long visit with her in-laws, and my baby niece has had her fill of her cousins and has started asking her parents to go home, and she’s been shutting herself in a closet in order to get alone time, i’m like “damn that’s fucked up she’s gotta do that just to get space.” and then i’m like “wait I did that all the time at my grandparents and i just got told i needed to stop being mean and hiding from my cousins.” and i’m like “…. was that fucked up for me too???”

(my sister is trying to figure out how to cut the trip short btw)

[terresdebrume]

I've started doing my Christmas shopping because I have some significant expenses coming up in the next couple of months (like buying a new large suitcase for example) and in itself it's a good idea but I will admit

I may have been a little overgenerous with myself xD