#maybe i just got lucky with the moveset

[ichorandpride]

i still think the dudebro side of elden ring being "WAAAH if you use summons or play with other ppl, youre CHEATING" is so fucking funny because guess what

Solaire wouldnt want you to say that.

he'd want you to be helped on this lonely journey. he'd want good old jolly co-operation!

[darkx-the-dragon-kn1ght]

Chapter 30- Part 5

Uh…I’m gonna…move on from that rant of mine and get back to explaining what makes Suna so neat. 

The third thing is her moveset:

Specifically, the fact that she has Sand Tomb, a move that gets powered up on Ashen Beach. Combine that with Suna’s pretty good Sp. Attack, and she can probably do real damage with that (and Shadow Ball once she learns it).

Of course, that's just one team member. The rest…well, lemme think about this.

I'm expecting Kiki to have a Medicham and/or a Lucario, those seem like staples of Fighting teams, and they can learn moves and have Abilities that synergize nicely with Ashen Beach. I don't think she's gonna have another Fighting/Psychic-type in the form of Gallade, since Victoria already had one and there are plenty of other Fighting-types to choose from. Like…Hawlucha! To use special Flying moves to mess with my own team's Accuracy! And maybe Heracross to deal with Psychic-types? 

She doesn't seem like the type to use Dark-types, and using Poison-types seems…darkly ironic given her condition so I doubt we're gonna see any of those either.

But Ame also brought up the move Meditate specifically. Other Fighting-type Pokémon who can learn that move in some fashion include:

Hitmonlee

Mienfoo/Mienshao 

Mankey/Primeape

Machop/Machoke/Machamp

Ame also said something about her Pokémon still being able to hit despite Accuracy drops, so that makes me think of Mind Reader. Other Fighting-type Pokémon who can learn that move somehow include:

Poliwrath

Tyrogue/Hitmonlee/Hitmonchan/Hitmontop 

Breloom

So…yeah, a good amount of options, still. So now, let me see what I can do in terms of teambuilding. I already mentioned Suna, and Riptide is a given, but outside of that…I mean, I already know not to rely on Flying-types, so that's one option out. That just leaves Psychic- and Fairy-types. Kirin seems good with Zen Headbutt, and Asano can learn that same move so I can probably add him too. I could also add Glare to the team, Intimidate goes hard and she can resist Fighting moves as a Poison-type. And…heck, let's bring Gust back in, priority Cotton Guard and Charm also go hard.

So in the end, the team's looking like this:

I'm gonna get everyone up to Lv. 44. I was considering Lv. 43 at first, but I'm also highly paranoid and so I'm going an extra level to be safe. Training time!

(Yet another training montage la

So I made a mistake.

I trained, I even got Asano to evolve-

But while I was training, I thought to myself, “Huh, shouldn't Asano have gotten Zen Headbutt by now?” And Bulbapedia seemed to agree with me…until I realized I was looking at the wrong thing. I was looking at Meditite/Medicham's Gen IX moveset, not their Gen VII set. And in Generation VII…the only way Meditite or Medicham can learn Zen Headbutt is through the Move Reminder. In fact, they can't learn any damaging Psychic-type moves (besides Confusion) just by leveling up. 

So…I can't use Asano for this fight. I need a different Pokémon, someone who can actually take advantage of Ashen Beach. Another Psychic-type probably, hmmm…

Looking at my Boxes, I can see…OH! Shimmer the Munna! She's got-

She's got Lucky Chant! That protects against critical hits! That'll be really helpful in case Kiki has more Telluric Seeds! And…she can also learn Psychic, which gets boosted on Ashen Beach! And I have a good amount of Moon Stones too, so I can easily evolve her!

Okay, so-

Yeah! This is gonna be the final team! Now we can really do some training!

(One ACTUAL training session later…)

So, with everyone evolved, this is what things are looking like now:

Shimmer is holding the Twisted Spoon to further boost her damage output with Psychic, while Suna is holding the Zoom Lens to make sure Sand Tomb will actually land. I didn't think anyone would really benefit from the Telluric Seed this time, so I'm holding onto it for now.

So now, here we are again. The other NPCs don't really say anything interesting, so let's talk to Victoria instead.

Thanks Victoria, no pressure-

Alright, let's see how this goes. I'm going to lead with Shimmer to start strong, and go from there.

Oh, Victoria's acting as the referee? That's neat, proud of her for moving up in the world.

What, can't even open your eyes to look at who you're fighting, Kiki? More disrespect! Can't have anything in the Reborn region …

Also- I'm sorry, but what the heck is this music? It's like…I can't even describe it, but it's not at all what I was expecting. What kinda whimsical wizard boss theme is this?? 

(Future edit: So I tried to look for what this track was because it was killing me, but I couldn't find anything. I'm sure it's a remix of some kind, by GlitchxCity or otherwise, but I just can't parse it. This is going to haunt me until the end of my days, if someone knows what this track is, let me know-)

Lv. 40…am I overleveled? Maybe. But still…let's just make sure we can kill and open with Calm Mind.

Oh, that might not be good. Unless…I mean, as long as it doesn't use a super effective attack, maybe it'll still be fine.

Previous

Next

[syrupspinner]

i just beat the messenger

there's a joke about shooting the messenger in there somewhere

so this is one of those games with a very specific thought process. let's add a unique and enticing gimmick, but make it a surprise reveal! I always thought this was a bit silly. like, if you're a fan of horror, then you have no reason to play doki doki literature club, because it's just a normal dating sim. but if you do know it's a horror game, then you just had half the game ruined for you, because so much of the presentation and writing and atmosphere and... EVERYTHING is done with the intention that you're going in blind. it's a weird conundrum between trying to market the thing that makes your game stand out and trying to maintain a cool subversive reveal.

the messenger has that in two parts. the first reveal is the time travel gimmick. you start off in an 8bit ninja gaiden-like platformer, and eventually upgrade into a 16bit ninja gaiden-like platformer, complete with world swapping puzzles. yeah, I love world swapping puzzles! link between worlds was my shit back on 3ds

the second part is that the game has a minor genre shift, going from a straightforward platformer to... a nonlinear platformer. I know that all the advertising says a metroidvania, and you can call me a genre snob for this, but I'm not sure if it really counts. sure there's some overlap, like the hub area, but like... you unlock all your cool new movement abilities during the platforming bit, so once the "metroidvania" part starts you don't unlock any new abilities, which is kinda stupid to say out loud. that's like saying you're playing as a roguelike without random generation, I think we lost the plot here.

don't get me wrong, just because it's not a metroidvania doesn't mean it's not fun. act 1 (the platformer) is already a fantastic retro platformer, reasonable difficulty that's juuuuust tough enough to keep you engaged without making you feel like you're being asked for too much, great controls and a good kit that gels with the level design really well, it's good shit. I don't play a lot of retro platformers, so I dunno if saying it's one of the best I've played holds much weight, but damn

act 2 (the not-metroidvania) is also fun! like I said, slut for world swaps. I'm VERY lucky that I was saving up my currency (gems?) so I could get all the map upgrades at once, I would have a very unfun time fumbling for all the collectables without the sparkles. there's also the prerequisite of backtracking through earlier areas, but I think the hub teleporters being in unique spots and the time travel make it more fun that it would've been

WAIT. RED ALERT. so as a peak behind the curtain, I usually write these as I play. maybe not the most professional form, but it helps me collect my feeling in the moment so I don't forget shit. I played like an hour and a half of act two, getting those green coin things and even got a few music notes, the one from the colosusses which was just a world swap puzzle and the yellow one that was just a platforming challenge. also, the fact that I could traverse what I thought was the whole world with my normal moveset made me complacent. but uh. I just got the Lightfoot tabi and I can now walk on water. so never fucking mind I guess! this is a certified metroidvania

ironically, I think the game is at its best with the linear design. when the game opens up, there are a lot of points that feel... easy to lose. there isn't that feeling of exploring for cool new movement tech, feeling your character get objectively more skilled and having that reflected in the map. there are spots like that, like the seashell and the candle. but just as much is like, talking to someone and then being like "don't worry I'll do the thing" and then they do the thing and you get a macguffin, which is much less satisfying in my opinion. like, there's the big where you have to go to an out-of-the-way spot to talk to a monk, and she just opens a path for you in another location. it's fine to have a progression system that isn't based on movement, but the genre shift makes it feel less... impactful. it feels like the game is caught between being a tradplat and a metroidvania, and suffers from trying to fit into both molds at once

so all in all, it's not a perfect 10/10, but it's still a great game that is absolutely worth your time. personally, I'd love to check out a full retro platformer from this team without the mid-game shift, something in the vein of Primal Light

also, there's this whole wrap-around thing when act 2 begins, where Manfred takes you so far east you wrap around west. then it's revealed that you're part of a time cycle thing, but... is Manfred part of it too, or is it like a different dragon every time? and if there's been a bunch of messangers before me, how come my village is still standing? and if the implication is that Manfred flew us around the literal whole world, like... why? why not just... oh fuck it it's not that important

[sadlazzle]

this got long so. rm

okay so i hav beat malenia, i jst got the demigod felled screen the split second i died but for some reason it decided not to count it as a win, but i am bc defeat message = defeated so. is what it is. but anyway. i don’t think she’s as good a boss as everyone loves to say. is she really good and fun and genuinely interesting ? yes, yes she is. is a lot of that interest sullied by a move born from such absolute bullshit that it can kill someone with 80 vig in one go ? also fucking yes. n ive seen a lot of ppl using the ‘git gud’ argument n sayinf shit like ‘well she’s an optional boss in an endgame area she should b hard’ b like. im not disputing she should b difficult, she’s hard enough on her own without wfd and that’s a straight fact. n like if u wanna get into it n compare the fight to other similar bosses in previous titles, let’s take two frm everyone’s favourite(for some reason) entry: DS3. slave knight gael and sister friede. both incredible bosses that challenge u quite a bit, with gael in my eyes being the perfected version. they’re both challenging bosses, and when i defeated them i didn’t feel like id gotten lucky - i felt like id learnt their movesets and figured them out, and earnt my wins. i’ll b real, im yet to feel like ive earnt a victory against malenia cause it was pure luck. pure and utter luck. and idk maybe it’s just me, but im not a huge fan of bosses that rely on luck and rng over actual skill. malenia does hav a lot of parts of her fight that involve skill and learning, but the fact that there’s a pretty significant luck element there rlly takes away frm such an amazing boss. ik i keep going on abt it but it jst rlly upsets me cause i think malenia is so fucking cool n they didn’t need to add artificial difficulty to an already amazing boss

[selfindulgentsillinessbracket]

Why Each Character(s) Were Chosen, or, Why These Sillies Are Special To Me - CHAPTER 1 of ??

This is a series of posts documenting why each silly in this bracket is in this bracket & why they're each special to me.

These will be getting fairly personal & I may ramble on too long but I want to be sincere so I won't hold back my overly silly manner of typing if need be.

These will be covered in order of appearance on the brackets from first to last contestant(s).

#1. Wario & Waluigi

Wario is straight up my favorite mario character. No cap. He's number 1. His character, his games (Wario Land is peak 2D platformer with the only series beating it in existence being Donkey Kong Country), his moveset. He's a king if you ask me. Waluigi is by all accounts my other fav. I'm so mad they refuse to use him in the Wario land games. The one series he SHOULD be in. I demand they treat him better. Anyways love these two goofballs & they've always struck a chord with me. I'm all about the goofy rivals. Wario & Waluigi are just pure fun. Love em. Also play Wario Land 4 because it's literally peak. I promise you it's worth your time.

#2 Calvin & Hobbes

Back when I was a wee lad, the thing that made me wanna do art in the first place? That was comic strips. In particular, Calvin & Hobbes, & Garfield. These two series are why I'm an artist. I owe it all to these two along with that fat orange cat. But we'll get to Garfield later, for now, let's focus on Calvin & Hobbes. They were the first ones I was introduced too. I didn't read Garfield til a few years after I met Calvin & Hobbes. I loved these two. And their comics are timeless. The writing is just out of this world with how smart & hilarious it is. It doesn't matter that it's from the 80s or 90s, they still ring true now. They're still God damn hilarious. These guys made me wanna make my own comics. Which led to me making my own characters. Which led to me becoming an artist. Thank you Calvin & Hobbes. Thanks for shaping who I am today.

#3 Squeek

Ok so there's not much to cover here. Squeek here is from a game called Oddworld: Squeek's Oddysee. Never heard of it? Yeah of course not, it was canceled. Like many Oddworld games sadly are. See the teason I have SO MANY oddworld reps on this bracket is 1. Yeah oddworld is extremely special to me. But 2. I'm hoping it'll cause more people to give the oddworld games a shot. They're so underrated. Legit my favorite story, world, lore & narratives in all of gaming. Squeek is a character who from what little we know, he's got so much potential. His lore is tragic and depressing but that makes you want to see him beat the odds like how Abe & Munch did. Squeek was meant to be our third protagonist. And maybe someday he'll get that chance again. Anyways please I implore you guys to give this series a shot. They're not perfect, but there's so much to love.

#4 Zoey

Ok Zoey is a character who I need to get personal to explain why she was a special enough OC to be in this bracket. So this is gonna be a long one. Zoey has been around for a while now. I mean like a while. She was created back in March of 2016. Yes I actually remember the exact time she was made. So yeah, that's her origin. The very first artwork of Zoey ever made has the original time saved on the upload date. Lucky us, bc we know her time of creation.

Zoey was officially created on March 3rd, 2016. Here was the first drawing of her. Comparison to her current look included :)

Now I know what you're thinking, yes this does look awful. I was not nearly as good at art back then. 2016 was a terrible time. But after that Zoey was just left forgotten, never had a real idea what to do with her. Until this past year, I uncovered her. And with a new design and finally having a solid personality to give her, she was given life. My life. Because the personality she ultimately found was just mine. She is quite literally the definition of a self insert. When I write Zoey I am literally just writing myself. Or to be more accurate, I'm writing a very cartoonishly exaggerated version of myself.

The fact people vote for her at all, it genuinely got me to cry more than once. It means so much to me. Bc Zoey means so much to me. So, thank you. And Zoey thanks you all too, she's humbled & would hug all of you if she could (and if we both were more open to physical contact but autism yknow yeah)

Next Chapter of this coming idk anyways Polls are still open so voting is still here for group 1 & 2!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[gaymer-hag-stan]

Who are your most wanted characters for TEKKEN 8?

I already have Nina and Jin and Jun secured so that's a good start

Other than them I want:

~Xiaoyu - Guaranteed, has been part of the main cast in every game since her debut

~Hwoarang - Same as Xiao

~Lili - She's too popular, I don't see her going anywhere

~Anna - She's missed 4 and was only added as DLC in 7 and she's been a locked character for much of the series history so I'm scared she may just be DLC again, but if she at least makes it in, even at a later stage in Tekken 8's lifespan, it'll still be something. I think there was backlash over her initial absence from 7 so maybe we're lucky this time!

~Miguel - I'm not sure if he's popular enough to make the cut, he was missing from Tekken 7's initial arcade release but he made it on consoles so maybe he'll be like season 2 DLC this time around or something like that?

~Zafina - I think the excuse for initially cutting her from 7 was that she wasn't popular enough in tournaments in previous games and that her moveset was too expensive and complex to animate, but this time they have ¥¥¥¥¥ from Tekken 7's amazing series sale record so they have no excuse

~Katarina - She was cool enough in 7. Not sure how popular or not she is but I'd love to see her again

~Shaheen - Same as Katarina. He's a guy so I feel like he's chances are better though

~Lucky Chloe - Absolutely loved her, her secretly bitchy personality and fake cutesy persona, the fact that she's a weeb catgirl idol hired by G Corp to make them look less evil, her trolling moveset, the whole DRAMA Americans caused when she was revealed and Harada jokingly threatening to make her a Japan and Europe exclusive character. Amazing 🤣 My only wish is that her mean side may occasionally sip through in her pre and post battle quotes this time, or even during gameplay! Like imagine her breaking character and yelling at her opponent during a combo or something and then snapping back into character in a "just kidding" style. I'd love to see that honestly!

~Christie - I will forever be bitter that they had both Kuma and Panda in Tekken 7 but somehow having Christie alongside Eddy was too much! I honestly don't care if Eddy makes it, I don't think he's that much more popular than Christie, I just want her back! She's too cool and pretty and fun and I miss her. She's the only Tekken 6 girl to not make it in 7! That's not fair! I really hope Harada doesn't exclude her this time only to spite the people spamming him on Twitter about her..!

~Lee - I think he's more or less guaranteed too. His role in the story has been expanding more and more since Tekken 6 and he seems to be harbouring Lars, Alisa and even Jin since Tekken 7 so he'll probably make it

~Asuka - If Lili is in then Asuka will probably make it too because they've been pushing them hard as the new, younger and cuter version of Nina Vs. Anna since Tekken 6, completely brushing Asuka's own story arc aside so... Yeah...

~Forest Law - Yeah... It's not happening since Marshall is already in but I kinda like the fact that he's a goofier, accident-prone version of his father

~Kunimitsu I - This one's not gonna happen either, since she already got the trademark Namco cutesy kiddie replacement in Tekken 7 (🙄) but one can dream I guess

[fierykitten2]

Okay going back to the whole UNITE concept stuff I’ve been working on - so I did swap the roles of Primarina/Rillaboom and Raging Bolt/Iron Crown because I didn’t think Bolt and Crown fit the Supporter role only now I’m thinking Prima and Rilla don’t fit the Supporter role either (I’d say Meganium is the closest any starter gets to Supporter and even then it doesn’t feel quite like it fits with the other Supporters) so I think I’m gonna have to change their roles again even though I liked how I had exactly two of each role. No one’s becoming a Supporter in their place because I think Wake and Leaves (Attackers), Chesnaught and Fire (Defenders) and Quaquaval and Boulder (Speedsters - yeah maybe I’m pushing Quaqua being a Speedster just because Aqua Step increases its speed) work well with the roles I’ve assigned them

Also another problem I’ve got (which probably wouldn’t be noticeable if it only happened once unfortunately it happens with almost all of them although Chesnaught starts off with a Rock-type move turning into one of two Fighting-type moves, Rillaboom has a Normal-type move turning into either a Normal-type move or a Grass-type move and Quaquaval has a Flying-type move turning into either a Flying-type move or a Fighting-type move) is forgetting that move slots don’t have to exclusively contain one type and the available moves don’t all have to be STAB moves (case in point Ceruledge getting the option to upgrade Lava Plume into Psycho Cut. Also none of the three moves available for its second slot share a type (Take Down is Normal, Phantom Force is Ghost, Flame Charge is Fire)). As a result, Leaves has ended up with moveslot 1 starting as Agility for some reason (maybe a dash attack similar to Sprigatito’s Hone Claws just with movement speed being increased instead of basic attack strength and speed) and then having the option to change it to either Psyblade (signature move, you know I had to include it. Genuinely the only reason I’ve tried using the moves for Delphox and Greninja that mean I can’t use the moves that used to be their signature moves is because I’m working towards their achievements for Holowear tickets so I can get Gren’s Fashionable style. I also have no idea what Ceruledge’s Psycho Cut is like because if I tried it out I only did it once because I didn’t realise the alternative was Bitter Blade) and Psychic Terrain (please Game Freak when you inevitably bring back Iron Leaves in Gen 10 at least let it learn Psycho Cut and Zen Headbutt. And since I’m making complaints about Paradox movesets please make Nasty Plot and Amnesia as well-distributed as Swords Dance and Iron Defense) so yeah I may try to work something out with these movesets or we can just accept the fact they’re not that good and some feel very forced (I tried to avoid reusing any Dragon-type moves for the Proto Beasts however I also wanted Fire to only have physical moves and Wake and Bolt to only have special moves. That didn’t work out well either. I got lucky with the Neo Swords because while I tried to do a similar thing with their Psychic-type moves Leaves (who would’ve had to share physical Psychic-type moves with Boulder) can’t actually learn any damaging Psychic-type moves that the rest of the Neo Swords can also learn)

[hazelplaysgames]

i'll just start counting. Lusy fight two, attempt numbah 1, her lead is Clefable, with an aura for +1 Sp. Def. level 50, perhaps the whole team will follow that number. i think i'll need to lead this fight with Cinnabar, for Spore and Acid Spray... hmm, Metronome for who knows what, Moonlight for longevity. Spore works just fine. still tanky as a wallnut at minimum Sp. Def, though, maybe i should get a Poison Barb on Cinnabar? hard to tell if that's better than a Scope Lens.

second 'mon is Bewear, +1 in... defense, actually. i was worried about attack or speed. well, try a similar strat, but instead of using Acid Spray, use Electro Ball. it KO'd Viridi with Hammer Arm, so it's slower still, and Cinny's Electro Ball did. oh that was like a 1/6th if i'm lucky. i got lucky here, it stayed asleep for the max amount of turns, that's KO two.

third up, Lilligant. i'm expecting it to have Teeter Dance, so Fuchsia for Own Tempo. set up Roc- it outspeeds!? and it has + sp. atk, ok, that Petal Dance is lethal. i can't rely on Spore for this one, it's grass type, uh. Cerulean to just Icicle Spear it straight out? nah, that needs at least 4 hits, but she does outspeed. it misses a Stun Spore, maybe i can two turn it? well, if i only need four hits, yeah, always.

fourth is Milotic, which is gonna be a bit hard with how little i have. i think i'll need Cinnabar for Milotic, and she's at 35 health right now. it has plus attack, i think i only have the chance to get 1 Spore off here, Acid Spray int- immediately woke up and KOs Cinnabar. Vermilion still has Struggle Bug, can that buy some time? it has Safeguard and Recover, pretty good for me to have her use those. i think i can safely Nuzzle it now... and then Hydro Pump crits, i don't think Cerulean can beat this alone, and -2 Sp. Atk makes Milotic's Hydro Pump do just past half health on her, but she can still Power-Up Punch through Milotic thanks to using Flail instead. 3 health left though...

fifth and last is Mismagius, who i can only presume has +1 speed. yep, and its Power Gem seals the match, yep.

definitely further than i thought i'd get, i was thinking about getting rid of Struggle Bug coming into this, but there's yet still purpose for it. i suppose i will still keep it. and to review what i have for the other three... nah, i think i will keep their movesets as is. Thunderbolt isn't a real option, my literal only chance for that in Moon(base) is Hau's Raichu. also, that goes for Psychic as well, those are some big name moves i'll could be missing out on if i can't beat Gladion before the other few hit 61. moving on from that for now, there's other details that might work in my favour, gotta wait and see.

i think the two biggest issues might be making Fuchsia put in work, and getting through Lilligant. i never got rid of Night Shade, is Clefable just fairy? ah, it is! i'll lead with Fuchsia actually, for Rocks... mmm, maybe not Leech Seed, possible Magic Guard, and hit it with Night Shade.

as for Lilligant, i'm not sure if it'll work, but if Viridian can hit Clear Smog, then Cerulean might be fine to take it out with Icicle Spear. dunno how it'll shake with Milotic and Bewear, the former is just real dang good, and the latter just made weird choices, i can't tell if things will be fine. that's enough theory crafting, i'm gonna consider held items and be back for the next try.

[cerastes]

El Bromas? Yeah, Batman is like the scariest mother fucker alive, but besides the asswhooping of a lifetime, every other day, you know you have a CHANCE. Dude's still human, sure, at the actual freaking peak of human performance, but human nonetheless. You can hope to get lucky one day and nail him with a stray bullet to the head.

The Flash's rogue's gallery? AFAIK most of them are people Going Through It, and Flash is like a really nice guy, so he'll roast you but then have a drink with you or something, and tuck you to bed after you calm down. That or he'll put you down so instantly that you kinda just speedrun the stages of grief. You're not winning this one, but at least dude's like high impact therapy.

Whoever is Wonder Woman's villains? Actually they are kind of in the same boat as Lex, thinking about it. What do you even DO. Scratch this one, I think WW is even worse, again, I don't comics but she's got no kryptonite as far as I know. Maybe Lex has it second worst.

Green Lantern? He's got weaknesses and shit, the color yellow, no? Also his own willpower. Like yeah he has every moveset in the world but also he has a way to get killed or disabled.

Superman? Technically kryptonite, but that's like saying "enough apple seed will give you cyanide poisoning" good luck with that Lex boy.

I don't comics but holy shit it must suck to be Lex Luthor. Imagine your nemesis being fucking Superman. What do you even DO.

[valdotpng]

Confession... I found Malenia really easy! I've been seeing people call her fight unfair (wildly disagree) or saying it took them like a hundred tried but it only took me five! It's just such a wild feeling. She hard punishes dodging backwards and she can heal even if your shield is up so I just... Switched into the Bloodborne mindset. Two handed (shields only engender passivity as it were) n dodge to the left or the right. Suddenly the boss was easy... Then phase two happened. I don't know how I did that actually.

5 tries.... wowie!!! well either u got super lucky or youre a god gamer. maybe both. in any case, good for u & congrats!! i play all souls games w/out shields bc of bloodborne, and i was only able to beat her after like.... probably 70? 80?? tries, and Only bc i summoned my mimic in phase 2 + got lucky w/ the attacks-- she didnt do waterfowl dance once during it. i think that one attack is the reason why people call her fight unfair! like, it IS possible to dodge it, but it requires such precise timing+positioning that it Feels really unfair to a regular player, yknow?

its a really fun boss otherwise though, imo <:] (& also the most punishing fromsofts ever made.) i had a blast learning her moveset + how to dodge it!!

[pokemoncreepypasta]

My Shining Star

[STORY SOURCE]

Up until some recent events, I used to be an aspiring shiny hunter. Technically I was pretty good at it, too, at least by encounter standards. But even though I was great at finding my fair share of shiny Pokémon , I’ve never been able to keep any of them.

The first one of these shiny Pokémon I found was by a random encounter. I’d gotten lost in Rock Tunnel after forgetting to bring Flash, and spent so long in there that I ran out of Repels. Just as I was giving up hope that I’d be able to escape on my first run, she appeared.

I knew about shiny Pokémon, but hadn't ever thought I'd encounter one of my own in the wild. I was unprepared, and after a moment of staring in surreal wonder, I concentrated on figuring out how to catch her with my limited supplies. Thankfully it wasn't very hard, and soon I had my first legit shiny.

I normally wasn't creative with naming my Pokémon, but I wanted her to have a special name. I asked my mom for help, and she suggested "Star." I liked it, but the name itself seemed short and boring, so I added a couple stars to the ends to give her name a little flair.

I was beyond excited to put my first shiny into my team, and plowed through the rest of the cave. She was the light at the end of the tunnel, and I had to get out to the nearest PC, because I knew a shiny baby Cubone was waiting for me to adopt her.

I quickly fell in love with the little green dinosaur, and soon she was the shining star of my team. I used her more than my starter, and neglected the rest of my party a bit in the process, but still made it through the game alright. Setbacks didn't matter when I had a shiny.

Lots of time and multiple trips through the Elite Four later, I proudly turned ★Star★ into a level 100 Marowak. She was the first Pokémon I ever raised to level 100, and I couldn't have been prouder of her.

It had been a couple years, and I was starting to feel unsatisfied with just ★Star★. I was itching for more, and felt like I probably should have found some other random encounters by now, with all the time I'd spent playing.

Feeling inspired by all the shiny hunter videos I'd been binging on YouTube, I decided to start taking up shiny hunting. I was feeling ambitious, and decided to go straight to hunting for a shiny legendary Pokémon. I was a weird player who didn't really bother going after the birds or Mewtwo in my HeartGold, since I planned on transferring up my legends from my LeafGreen. I decided to rework ★Star★'s moveset for capturing legendary Pokémon.

The moveset I settled on was Bonemerang, False Swipe, Stone Edge, and Swords Dance. I decided to keep her moveset mostly offensive because she was still a member of my team, and not just a shiny-catcher. I planned on replacing False Swipe with Aerial Ace at some point, but I never got the chance to.

I decided to pick Mewtwo as my target. Lots of people find green shiny Pokémon overbearing and unattractive, but ★Star★ made me fond of them. Plush, Mewtwo was awesome, and I thought the two of them would look great together.

I spoke to ★Star★ aloud, saying, "Are you ready to do some shiny hunting, ★Star★?"

"★Star★ let out a roar!"

I thought she was just as enthusiastic as me.

I made it to Mewtwo, saved my game, and started the tedious process of soft resetting.

I’ll spare the details of how long it took, but eventually I came across the sparkling green Mewtwo.

I led with my team's Ampharos to paralyze it, and switched to ★Star★.

I remember being very lucky with this fight at first, with Mewtwo being fully paralyzed every turn.

I used Swords Dance to fully buff ★Star★'s attack stat so False Swipe would do as much damage as possible.

But even though I swore that I had chosen to use False Swipe, ★Star★ proceeded to use Bonemerang.

Shocked, confused and distressed, I watched as ★Star★ mercilessly beat the shiny Mewtwo down, knocking it out in one hit with her increased stats.

I felt crushed and dejected as I went back to the overworld. I blamed myself, thinking I had misclicked the wrong move and killed the Mewtwo myself. In my wave of disbelief, I absentmindedly talked to ★Star★.

"★Star★ is green with envy!"

I decided to go back to square one and start over.

A dozen thousand resets later, I saw it sparkle again and I was shaking with anticipation. Part of me felt twitchy and paranoid, like I should have used my Master Ball right away.

I decided against it because I wanted to hunt the birds later, but decided that if the Mewtwo seemed like it would run low on moves, then I'd use it as a last resort.

I probably should have listened to my guts though, because the same thing happened all over again. I knew for certain this time that I had chosen False Swipe, but the game purposefully made ★Star★ use Bonemerang. I saw it completely clear.

After seeing the Mewtwo go down a second time, I just cursed and slammed my desk a bit. I glared accusingly at my Marowak.

I decided to put my shiny hunting on hold. I used an Escape Rope to leave, and decided to place ★Star★ in the PC, quarantining her in an empty box for a time-out.

As I dejectedly hunted for a third time, I thought to myself what was wrong with my game. I wondered if it was just glitchy, or if I was misinterpreting the situation. I decided to convince myself that it was a mistake on the game's part; otherwise I wouldn't have been able to handle killing the Mewtwo twice in a row.

Finally, it sparkled one last time. I decided not to screw around while reclaiming this shiny. I had hunted it twice before, and decided to just use the Master Ball on it.

I had earned this.

After the initial rush of finally obtaining the shiny, I decided not to nickname it until I thought of something good, and watched as it got sent to the PC. I excitedly saved my game, and made my way out of the cave and to the nearest Pokémon Center.

But when I got there, the Mewtwo wasn't anywhere to be seen.

I shouted curses in confusion as I scrolled through every box in a state of denial. Where did it go, what could I have possibly done? I thought of all the ways I couldn't possibly messed up, did I have an evil hacked Pokémon from the GTS that deleted it, was this actually a bootleg game and Nintendo's anti-piracy revenge was to delete my legendary?

After a few minutes of searching, I gave up. My Mewtwo was gone.

I scrolled back to ★Star★'s isolated box and looked at my only green shiny in mourning. Obviously it wasn't something wrong with just her, but the game itself. In a game as glitchy as this, I was seriously worried that I might lose her, too.

After looking at her for a bit, it seemed like she might've been looking at me? I wasn't sure if she was supposed to do that, but in a game that was acting up like this, I didn't doubt it.

I took her out of the PC and put her at the front of my party to talk to her, to see if anything else was up.

"★Star★ nodded slowly."

She only did more random friendly things after that. Quite chipper for someone whose life might be threatened, I thought.

I decided to trade her over to Platinum for safe keeping. I wasn't sure what to do about the rest of my Pokémon on HeartGold, but ★Star★ was the most important one to me right now.

As I traded her over, I noticed that her eyes were red now, instead of the green I was just looking at. I was off-put by this inconsistency, especially with the recent events surrounding her. I forced myself to brush it off, however, notice I could do about it.

Even though I had an unfortunate experience with my HeartGold, my thirst for more shinies still persisted. Maybe it was the fact I had lost my shiny three times that I really had to fill the void, now.  A couple weeks later, I found out about a method of shiny hunting called chaining, and wanted to try it out. I felt a little more at ease, since if you accidentally killed a shiny with this method, the chain wouldn't break, and you could keep going. Plus, Platinum should've been fine.

I chose Route 208, as it had a good selection of Pokémon for me to choose from. I wasn't picky, so I just started chaining whatever Pokémon I liked until I got a decent chain. I heard that the shiny odds max out at a chain of 40, so after that you can just keep resetting the radar until the grass sparkles.

I landed on Roselia, and sent out my shining star Marowak.

I started with False Swipe, since I wouldn't need to buff up ★Star★ for a LV. 19 Pokémon.

"★Star★ used Swords Dance!"

Oh no.

I panicked as memories of the last incident came flooding back, and how it had started out with her disobeying. Not giving her a chance to kill it, I frantically switched to the items menu to start throwing PokéBalls instead.

(Name omitted for personal reasons.)

I had plenty of them, so I stared throwing Ultra Balls, since they had the highest odds. At least one of these would probably work.

" blocked the Ball!"

"Don't     !"

I tried throwing one, but it failed, as if I tried using it on a trainer's Pokémon.

I had no idea what in the world was going on, what could be stopping me from catching a wild Pokémon? Was my Platinum glitched out too? Was I cursed??

I tried using different balls, but nothing would work.

Eventually, I ran out of PokéBalls to throw. I'd failed the shiny.

Frustrated, but not enough to kill the Roselia, I fled the battle.

I had no idea what to do after that, and was exasperated. I wanted to berate myself, and that I should've tried test catching a normal Pokémon in Platinum first to make sure it was going to work okay. But really, how was I supposed to know that was going to happen? And always, conveniently when I was in the middle of hunting a shiny. I thought of berated my parents instead, if they had bought all my Pokémon games for me on eBay.

Was it really my games, thought? I don't even know if you can trade Pokémon from fake games. Was it my DS could it have been hacked? Can you even bootleg a DS? I tried going to the Internet for answers, and read some Reddit and random Pokémon forum posts about glitches and bootlegs for an hour, but gave up without finding a real conclusion.

So, I'd given up hunting for some time. But, I hadn't gotten tired of Pokémon. I bought Black for myself, and played through the story just fine.

I found out you could get a Shiny Charm if you completed the Pokédex. That made me excited, until I remembered my past luck. Was it worth trying again?

Shortly after transferring up all my Pokémon, I decided, yes. It was. I went for the hatching method this time, since the Pokémon ends up right in your party afterwards- no catching, no PC transfer. It would be my final test, and if THIS didn't work, I would officially give up on ever getting nice things.

Foreign Ditto in hand, I went to work. I went for a shiny Flygon, since they were one of the best looking, and it'd be a nice addition to my competitive team.

One long hunt and a really late night later, eyelids barely able to stay open, I saw it.

I'd never seen anything more beautiful.

Skipping the nickname, I rushed to immediately save my game, wasting no time. I checked my party to see my Trapinch was still there, and chalked it up as a success. I was an official shiny hunter now.

Since ★Star★ was level 100, I figured she could battle for my baby Trapinch until she could hold her own in battle. I only wanted to take her up a few levels, so I could personally train her afterwards. Just raising her immediately into a Flygon would be too soon.

I attached an Exp. Share to her, and started running around in the tall grass. After a little bit of grinding, my Trapinch made it up to level 8 before I accidentally stepped into the thick grass and triggered a wild double battle.

Knowing the wild Pokémon were too strong for the underleveled baby Trapinch, I wanted to flee, but I first noticed ★Star★'s sprite as it asked me what to do.

The end of her bone facing the wild Pokémon was no longer symmetrical, being sharpened at the end of it. I'd seen her sprite enough times to know it wasn't supposed to look like this.

I tried to flee, but it failed.

"★Star★ used Swords Dance!"

"The wild Pidove is watching carefully!" 

"The wild Patrat is watching carefully!" 

"Trapinch is watching carefully!" 

★Star★ had started using moves on her own. Stunned, I tried to switch out.

"★Star★ can't be switched out!"

Giving up, I told ★Star★ to use Stone Edge on the Pidove, and told the Trapinch to use Bite on Patrat.

"★Star★ ignored orders!" 

"★Star★ used Bonemerang!"

I gasped as she struck my Trapinch instead.

"★Star★ is green with envy!"

As soon as I read that text, it hit me. This wasn't any ordinary friendly fire.

"Trapinch fainted!"

It finally allowed me to run, so I immediately tapped the button and rushed to my party to see the damage.

My Trapinch was gone.

I tried resetting to bring her back, but it was hopeless. My shiny new baby had been murdered.

Connecting all the dots in my head, I realized the reason I'd failed every encounter was because of ★Star★.

My grief and fear quickly turned into outrage. I couldn't believe she'd done this to me. She'd made me suffer hunt after hunt, just to take every shiny away from me.

This was the source of my games acting strange, and I knew there was only one way to correct it.

Feeling rash, I rushed over to the PC and hovered over the "Release" option for a few minutes.

"★Star★ was released."

It hurt to let her go, but I didn't want my game behaving strangely with her around.

"★Star★ came back!"

"★Star★ will never leave you."

But she refused.

Resorting to desperate measures, I did the only other thing I could think of.

I traded the stubborn Marowak over to my nearly empty White version that I never got around to playing, and deleted the save file.

"Deleting all saved data... Don’t turn off the power."

"★Star★ will n"

Sayonara, ★Star★.

After deleting the save file, I thought things would start working like they should. Sometimes, I'd replay other Pokémon games just for the fun of it, hoping I'd find other shiny Pokémon with ★Star★ gone.

Almost comically, I somehow thought it would be a good idea to go full circle and try hunting on HeartGold for a shiny starter. I had heard from other shiny hunters that it was an easy hunt, and it was, only taking a few days.

I affectionately named him "Chico."

My first step into the tall grass, and...

"★Star★ is green with envy!"

I had never been so unhappy to see a shiny.

I guess she's been out in the wild all these months. And looking at her sprite, I can only wonder what she's been up to. I wonder how she feels to see me again?

Oh, no.

“Can’t escape!”

"★Star★ used Bonemerang!"

"Chico fainted!"

Of course, Chico was no match.

The game froze after I blacked out.

I figure it was because ★Star★ killed my only Pokémon.

"The save file is corrupted. The previous save file will be loaded."

My save file, corrupted with the loss of my starter's data, brought me back right to this spot that I was all too familiar with. Through frustrated tears, I begrudgingly went to pick a normal starter so I could play the game normally.

“I dare you to love again.”

And I’ve never found a shiny since.

[darkx-the-dragon-kn1ght]

Chapter 30- Part 7

Still going, still going, it's a war of attrition right now…

OH NEVERMIND! IT FACEPLANTED AGAIN!!

She…does have a Poison-type?? Okay, horrific irony aside, I know how to deal with this- Shimmer time again!

I'm sure Psychic can one-shot, but in case it uses Sucker Punch, I'm gonna use Calm Mind.

Poison Jab? Not Sucker Punch? Well- okay, maybe it'll do it on this turn, so I'll have her use Moonlight.

Poison Jab again?? Does it…not have Sucker Punch or something…? I mean, works for us, she can just kill with Psychic now-

Panic panic panic panic-

Okay- maybe it'll start by setting up...I dunno, Swords Dance. In that case, we can heal with Moonlight, then go into Lucky Chant.

PANIC PANIC PANIC PANIC WE NEED LUCKY CHANT FIRST oh wait Shimmer’s slow there's no way she outspeeds…

Okay- send in Gust first to buy time to Revive Glare.

Well, at least now we know Gust can live a Night Slash crit.

Poison Jab, fascinating. Now bring in Glare, Intimidate is only one part of this…

Paralysis is the key. Do your thing, Glare!

Okay, apparently this Gallade has Rock Slide as well (which missed, luckily). So now we heal Shimmer, and then…

Your sacrifice won't be in vain, Glare!! Also its final move is Strength apparently. Fascinating moveset it's got here.

Now, I'm…not actually sure if Shimmer can outspeed even with the Paralysis, so I need to hope for a stun.

OH SHE LIVED THAT, OH SHOOT-

Well that allows Lucky Chant to go through, so now I can send in Suna-

A Paralysis proc also helps. So now, we have four turns to do this…let's see what Shadow Ball can do!

Oh, that definitely helps- though I feel like a second Shadow Ball would kill anyways.

Yeah, I knew a Lucario would show up. I think Suna can handle it, but I need to heal her, so let's bring in Riptide for the time being.

Previous

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[twothpaste]

putting my long-winded reasonings below the cut, 'cause i spent way too much time thinking them through, and my work musn't go to waste

Ness: Blastoise: They have the exact same energy, I can't explain, Ness and Blastoise are just on identical vibe wavelengths. Dragonite: A bulky and reliable mon, heals itself with Roost, also haha the Bag of Dragonite item. Slowbro: Teleport, healing moves, all-purpose support mon, straight up looks like an EarthBound enemy. Subtle nod to Magicant seashells even though that's a Mother 1 thing, shhh. Toxtricity: PK Rockin'!!!!!!! Also Paralysis. Musharna: Magicant for real though, Hypnosis, another squishable healy Psychic-Type for good measure. Garbodor: Checking every trashcan for items, homage to all the gross-out humor, "this game stinks!!!" Garbodor is adorable and Ness would think so too.

Paula: Vanilluxe: PK Freeze!! The notorious ice cream Pokemon was created as a humorous homage to American sweets, and I am giving it to an EarthBound character for the same reason here. Also this thing's Ice Beams and Blizzards hit as hard as any high-level PSI attack. Ampharos: PK Thunder!! Somethin or other about sheep appearing in a lot of nursery rhymes for preschool-age children. Somethin else about lighthouses symbolizing hope ie. Paula's prayers during the Giygas fight. Walk with me here. Delphox: PK Fire!! This guy and Braixen seem the most Paula-core of the Pokemon with future vision abilities. Quietly slipping in an aside about how my Paula is a D&D DM (the Kalos starters are based on classic RPG archetypes). If she were a party member, she would absolutely play a sorcerer. Bewear: Tebby dear :) Uses its Ability to sponge physical attacks like the EarthBound item, but also watch the fuck out Paula will wreck a bitch. Togekiss: Metronome in reference to Pray's random combat effects, immobilizes opponents with lucky rng and secondary effects much like Paula often does. Could loosely reference the eggs & chicks & chickens that fill your inventory over the course of the game. Meowstic F: The Polestar Preschool cat, Light Screen / Reflect, more offensive capabilities than its male counterpart.

Jeff: Dragapult: Rocket launch bazooka kapow kaboom brbrbrbrbrbr. Ghost-Type for a guy who joins the party during the Threed shenanigans. Potentially powerful mon that's often used for speedy utility instead, may run a bazillion different items but will almost always be very reliant upon them. Inteleon: Finger guns, reference to his Spy ability, also British af. Corviknight: Excruciatingly British, Spiteful Crow, a support mon with lots of utility moves. Flying Taxi schtick as a parallel to the Sky Runner. Excadrill: Much like Jeff, this thing's a monstrous attacker with the right items & team support. Also packs a lot of supportive utility moves. Reference to the Guardian Diggers and Mole Playing Rough. Magnezone: Sky Runner / UFO, literally looks like something Jeff would wrench and cobble together in a hotel room overnight. Ambipom: Bubble Monkey, nod to all the other 5000 monkeys in EarthBound, look at its fucking bangs it's got Jeff's haircut.

Poo: Thundurus: PK Thunder!! Covered in clouds like Dalaam, rides on stormclouds like Poo & the Starstorm Master do that one time, kinda looks like it could be an Earthbound enemy come to think of it. Annihilape: Ruthlessly powerful fighter, runs remarkably tactical movesets, ghostly spirit as a nod to Poo's Mu Training Master, Vital Spirit and Inner Focus and Defiant are all pretty Poocore abilities. Mienshao: A more elegant fighter, with loads of strategic utility and self-healing moves / Abilities. Ditto: That Mirror technique though. Starmie: PK Starstorm let's gooo!!! Also Teleport. I think there was an implication that humans learned PK Starstorm from aliens, Starmie is implied to maybe be of extraterrestrial origin. Neato. Chien-Pao: PK Freeze!! Sword of Kings baybeee!!! An embodiment of human greed and malicious impulses, a trainer must presumably be quite self-disciplined to earn this thing's respect. I can think of few better equipped for the task.

Porky: Spoink: Obligatory hog, pearls before swine, only fitting he'd have a little wind-up toy unevolved mon because he refuses to grow the fuck up. Araquanid: Spider mech, spends its entire existence in a capsule-like protective bubble, uses tricks like Sticky Webs to inconvenience opponents. Beheeyem: Mandatory alien mon, also it fucks with memories and could probably brainwash people, isn't that just neat. Dracovish: This thing literally looks like it crawled out of the Chimera Lab. An oft-detested menace that wreaks complete havok upon any metagame it's allowed in. Duraludon: It's the Empire Porky Building. And a really fucked up dragon. Also, its G-Max move borrows the effect of the move Spite. Haha. Guzzlord: Is it an extraterrestrial horror beyond human comprehension, or a metaphor for capitalism's insatiable drive toward unsustainable consumption? The answer is a resounding Yes.

Tracy: Shelmet. It'll evolve into a speedy Accelgor one day. Escargot Express, that's my whole bit.

Ness' Dad: Gh. Gholdengo. That's all.

Lucas: Leafeon: Same humble vibes, mandatory Grass-Type for a nature-loving fella, its stats (especially that 130 Defense) make it way more resilient than it looks, Chlorophyll Ability befitting of a "brilliant young sun." The Pokedex says it doesn't like to fight, but will do so to protect its friends 🥺!!! Maushold: Representing all the little white mice you befriend over the course of the game, 10-hit combo attack rock your whole world, Friend Guard Ability, it is a wholesome family of four isn't that sweet :^) Politoed: "Hop hop, save your game?" Drizzle as a loose reference to the rain that puts out the Sunshine Forest fire (there's a parallel with Claus' team here wait for it). Marowak: Almost too obvious at face value, but dude. It fights with a stick-like weapon, this down-to-earth little dude needs a sturdy classic Ground-Type, also it can learn fire ice and electric moves, maybe that constitutes a cute nod to Smash Bros Lucas if you squint. Oh, and it's packing the very obligatory Lightningrod Ability :'). Dubwool: Comin out of my sheep farm and I've been doin just fine. Bulletproof, Fluffy, and Steadfast are all Abilities that suggest a capacity to withstand damage and take hits in stride. Cough. Wheeze. Latias: Psychic Dragon Twins, bulky mon with so many ways to support its teammates, Wish, Light Screen / Reflect, tends to play patiently with boosting and healing moves. A plain n' gentle creature amongst the ranks of legendary Pokemon, much like Lucas is about as plain n' gentle as prophesied heroes come.

Claus: Jolteon: And the lightning and the lightning and the lightning. Iron Thorns: He who fights Mecha Dragos only to become the very monster he sought to destroy ends up with one on his Pokemon team. Talonflame: The upending of this kid's whole life started with a forest fire. Tiny nod to the advice sparrows. A hasty attacker whose best moves deal recoil damage. Stealth Rock is its achilles heel, which I think fits a character who got thrown off a cliff to a rocky demise. It is also my strong personal conviction that Claus would think falcons are one of the coolest animals ever. Bisharp: Looks the part, wields blades, made of metal. Based on chesspieces, lo and behold, the Masked Man is but a mindless pawn. Its Abilities are Defiant, Inner Focus, and Pressure. Good fucking lord. Type Null: Press F to cry. Latios: Psychic Dragon Twins, a swift and dangerous sweeper, sometimes plays the role of a "revenge killer," often strapped with a Choice Item locking it into potentially reckless plays. Incidentally, its greatest nemesis is a big green mountain godzilla who 1-shots it with Pursuit. Remember that movie where Latios gave his life trying to be a good brother? I sure do.

Kumatora: Incineroar: PK Fire!! Also look at this lovable tough guy, flavor text says it's great with kids, you know Kuma would go hog wild for WWE. Bearctic: PK Freeze!! She has bear in her name, what's a guy to do. Nod to Snowcap Mountain, which most players brave with Kumatora as Lucas n' Boney's sole companion. Electivire: PK Thunder!! Usually runs mixed sets, meaning it can use its Attack stat to punch you in the face and its Special Attack stat to electrocute you. Nod to Thunder Tower as well. In general I think she'd gravitate toward these kinds of tough "masculine" lookin' Pokemon. Gengar: Osohe Castle Ghosts, same energy, if Kuma were a Pokemon fan I feel like she'd love this thing, she would be buying Gengar pins and socks and plushes off etsy, but more importantly it's a frail yet versatile special attacker just like her. Clefable: PK Starstorm!! Looks like a Pokemon her folks would give her. Fandom comparisons between Gengar and Clefable could parallel Kuma's dual nature as a fiesty badass but also a supportive friend. :') Garchomp: PK Ground!! Shout out to the Rough Skin Ability I think it suits her too.

Duster: Thievul: I mean come on it even has his mustache, speedy mon with support moves, often overlooked but lowkey pretty nifty. Hitmontop: Kicking moves and supportive tactics, Intimidate = Scary Mask, Fake Out parallels Duster's trick where he flips the opponent and earns you an extra turn. Cinccino: Tickle Stick, speedy little fucker, Skill Link Ability cuz for some reason I manage to get combo attacks better with Duster than anyone else. Ninjask: Siren Beetle, Speed Boost, notorious for its team support gimmicks, quick & stealthy as hell. Weezing: Smoke Bombs, Duster is canonically smelly, also just look at it, it really shares his silly gloomy slightly miserable demeanor I think. Orthworm: Hear me out. It ain't a snake, but it is a funnyguy who looks more like Rope Snake than most snake Pokemon do. It's based on subways and tunnel infrastructure, straight up looks like a Mother 3 critter you'd encounter in the train tunnels & highway areas, which you explore en route to Duster / with the newly-recruited Duster. I also just think Duster would be over-the-moon enamored with this ridiculous thing.

Boney: Boltund is a speedy Wooloo-herder with a perpetually doofy expression. Daschbun looks the part better, and might be a cute allusion to all the baked goods you can eat in Tazmily. I don't think either suits him perfectly, can't quite choose between them. Funnier third option: He is still just an ordinary dog. Nobody questions it.

Flint: Dubwool again. Galarian Farfetch'd. Mudsdale. I think Scovillain would be funny.

Dark Dragon: Reshiram & Zekrom. One and the same, two sides of the coin, themes of paving a new future led by truth or ideals or both, Reshiram's torch tail and Pokemon Black's traditionalist vibes vs Zekrom's electrical generator tail and Pokemon White's futuristic vibes. It just works.

Ninten: idk but like Eiscue for sure right. Slowking as well. Magicant creature for real.

Lloyd: Palafin bigly. Zero to Hero, dude. Look me in the eyes and tell he isn't a comic book herd. Perhaps 1 sad little Magnemite.

Ana: Mega Audino feels like the most Christian Pokemon somehow. Xurkitree has one of the highest Special Attack stats in the game. It's loosely based on a Christmas tree. It's really winning me over here, please disregard the fact it's my favorite Pokemon. "My mom got kidnapped by aliens, but joke's on them, I caught one." Imagine.

Teddy: Kingambit tho. Cyclizar. Pangoroooooo. Oh. Squawkabilly too. The hair. Intimidate. Guts. Sheer Force. Please.

updated my silly little earthbound pokemon teams recently. hello everybody and happy generation nine ( 9️!!! ) of pocket monsters 🥳

[diffractor]

I was thinking back to childhood memories, and just realized that the gba game “Sonic Battle” I played a very long time ago was plausibly a subconscious motivating factor for finding AI safety to be an important thing to work on. Said game is a Sonic fighting game, with a hell of a story, though it only really clicks once you do a second playthrough with enough context to see what’s actually going on there. So, this is the plot with full context (and filling in tidbits of info that you only get on the second playthrough), and I’m doing it from memory so there may be some inaccuracies. Once upon a time there was the 4th great Civilization. Key word, “was”. The thing that wiped them out was that they made a very specific robot, as a weapon of war, named Emerl (though that isn’t the original name), and... it didn’t go so well. Emerl’s ability was to be able to copy any attack or weapon used against it, or that it observes. This manifests in the game as Emerl not having a fixed moveset, you can splice together whichever moveset you want from the moves of all the other characters you’ve fought against. Just stitch the best healing and the best movement speed and the best attacks and best projectiles and a “self-destruct after you die” special ability together from all the different characters, and plow through the rest of the cast. Anyways, it was built as a weapon of war, and the creators didn’t last too long after that, though it isn’t specified precisely what happened. Eggman’s father (or grandpa, maybe?) is tasked by the military with creating weapons of war. He doesn’t really want to do this, and so tends to make freely willed things that can reject being a weapon. One of which was Shadow the hedgehog, and also, as his logs show, he found Emerl on an archeology trip too, and kinda freaked out when he realized exactly what that particular robot was. He wasn’t able to completely override the original programming, just put in some modifications. Later, Eggman gets a hold of Emerl somehow, and after a bit of testing and using it to make crappy knockoff robots, deems it a useless pile of trash and certainly not the civilization-ending weapon it’s supposed to be and throws it away on the beach. Sonic finds the abandoned robot, and shows off his moves. Emerl bonds with him (read: follows Sonic around and obeys commands and if Sonic tells Emerl to obey someone else then Emerl has a new master), because one of the things it’s programmed to do is to obey someone who displays sufficient power. It can barely talk, isn’t that good at fighting, and Tails is trying to figure out what the deal with it is. It seems to be attracted to Chaos Emeralds, and after getting the first one, there’s a notable boost in its ability to copy things, fight, and talk, going from “barely able to talk” to “low-quality chatbot trained on a corpus of sonic and tails talking” to “gpt-2 trained on sonic, tails, knuckles, and amy” to “gpt-3 trained on the whole sonic cast” as the game progresses and you acquire more. There’s a bunch of adventures which are mostly pointless, by my estimation, with a bunch of characters trying to use Emerl for their own ends, and getting into shenanigans, and fighting off Eggman, while nobody seems to realize they’ve got a civilization-destroying weapon on their hands. The only sane character worthy of any respect in this entire shitshow is Shadow the Hedgehog, who knows what Emerl actually is and is trying his best to kill the damn thing, while everyone else unreasonably insists on getting in his way and feeding Emerl more Chaos Emeralds because he’s their friend. Idiots. We get to the Shadow arc. Apparently Shadow and Rouge have found Eggman’s (dad’s? grandpa’s?) logs, and apparently when it gets all 7 Chaos Emeralds, it will awaken to its original form. And he managed to set things up so if you say the password “bring hope to humanity” upon Emerl fully waking up... it gets sealed again, and acts as just a friendly Sonic character with free will again, having fun with the rest of the cast. Shadow gives Emerl the last Chaos Emerald and does that, after some meaningful chats. And then the Emerl arc, the final one. Eggman has apparently made some villainous spaceship floating in the sky and being ominous, and the sonic crew sends Emerl up to give Eggman an ass-whooping, which he does. And then Eggman reveals that it was a trap, fires the big spaceship gun (which apparently wipes out some stars, but I reject this because physics and my headcanon is that it just made a big new crater on the moon), and reveals that there’s one last bit of knowledge that nobody knew about. Emerl will always make a bond with anyone that displays overwhelming power, far in excess of what has previously been shown. And all the happy-go-lucky friendly robot nonsense is wiped away, and the ancient weapon of war (which Emerl always was, Shadow should have turned it into scrap) awakens at full power, and starts gathering energy. Eggman tries to direct it (and fails). It aims the big spaceship gun at earth, and Eggman is quite put out by this, because he just wants to rule the world, not destroy it. But, y’know, if you play around with civilization-destroying robots, your civilization might end up destroyed, who would have thought. Emerl beats Eggman up. Sonic takes the Master Emerald (capable of controlling the Chaos Emeralds) and teleports onto the ship to try to use it to reign Emerl in, as their last hope. The heroic victory at the last moment. Emerl unceremoniously smashes it before it can be used. 30 seconds until end of earth. Shadow chooses to go out with a few edgy lines about “the final voice of the last war machine” and “natural result of ignorant human desires” Cream chooses to go out with “are we all... going to die? :(” Tails chooses to go out frantically advising Sonic on how, if he can inflict massive damage on Emerl, since Emerl has too much power stored up and is highly unstable, it should be able to take him out. Sonic chooses to go out fighting Full Power Emerl entirely equipped with blink-fast 2-hit-ko attacks. And then you defeat Emerl and he suffers but shuts down back to normal and looks like he’s gonna live... And then beeping. Apparently Eggman’s grandpa put in a self-destruct safeguard. Emerl dies via self-destruct, and everyone is sad, and I cried a bit as a kid, and they talk about making a better world... And (it may just be me), there’s one last note of discontent in your mind after beating the game. You didn’t beat Emerl in 30 seconds. In fact, I don’t think it’s even possible to beat that final battle in 30 seconds. If the situation had actually happened, there wouldn’t have been a heroic final victory after Emerl shattered the Master Emerald. Sonic would have had his ass handed to him, or not won in 30 seconds, and the Earth would be destroyed thanks to Dr. Eggman and everyone involved in waking Emerl up and thinking they were helping, and Shadow failing at killing the robot early on, and that would be that. You now probably see why this old gba game could be a subconscious motivator.

[broken-clover]

AU-gust Day 6- Hospital

I’m here early! Mostly because I had a lot of this written earlier, so if that didn’t make it obvious enough I really liked this prompt. While it’s a hospital prompt is isn’t especially intense or gory, after yesterday I tried to make this one pretty lighthearted. Honestly I feel like the only really uncomfortable part of this is how much effort I put in trying to make a Pokemon expy. Hehe.

Sorry-not-sorry for more Sin and Bedman, it’s a bit more ‘romantic’ then last time but still pretty much platonic friendship. Enjoy!

Though it felt weird to say, Sin knew his least favorite thing about his father was his charity. Helping out people in need was a good thing, obviously, but a ridiculous amount of his childhood memories involved being dragged along to food banks, hospitals, and shelters so his dad could give corny, well-wishing speeches and lend a hand to those less fortunate, forcing him to help out alongside the other volunteers. Sin had used to wonder if it was because something about having a cute little kid around raised everyone’s morale, or whatever.

Well, considering he was now a grown-ass teenager at the age of sixteen, and Ky was still dragging him along, maybe he’d been off the mark.

At least he’d been allowed to take a break after an hour of schlepping donation boxes up to the children’s wing. Of all the places his dad went to for charity work, hospitals were by far his least favorite. The colorless, sterile atmosphere was just unnerving to be around. As soon as he could, he made a dash for the nearest sign pointing him toward the courtyard.

Sin swiped his guest ID through the maglock, which released with a cheery beep. The white walls and stench of antiseptic gave way to an array of soft colors and the smell of flowers. He took a deep whiff of the aroma and sighed with relief. He reached into his back pocket and pulled out his handheld, fully charged for when he got a break and could take a minute to loaf off and relax.

Which game had he left in it this time? He popped out the cartridge and smiled. That was right. Pocket Beasts: Light version. His current favorite. He just needed a comfy place to hunker down and play.

A few stone benches were placed in between bushes and flowerbeds, all unoccupied. The place looked really empty, but it made sense. Everyone who wasn’t already busy was probably at Ky’s speech. At least it meant he’d be able to get some peace and quiet and privacy.

He spotted a pretty lavender flower poking out of the bushes and approached. The ‘flower’ moved, making him realize he’d seen wrong. Sin groaned inwardly at the sight of another person, perched on the short stone wall surrounding the flowerbeds. They didn’t glance up, if they’d even noticed him at all, appearing too absorbed in their own handheld device to care about much else.

“H-hey.” He raised a hand at them, and offered a twitchy half-smile. There were so many ways he knew this could go wrong. Sometimes people screamed at him until he fled, or immediately launched into the most boring small-talk possible. Sin just wanted to play his game, he really had no interest in causing any trouble. “Can I sit down?”

Sin braced himself for a response, but he didn’t get one. “Hey?” He tried again, waving harder. Maybe they were deaf? “Is it ok if I sit out here?”

Eyes glanced up at him, but only for a half-second before they returned to the screen. Well, it wasn’t a ‘no,’ so the best he could assume was they just didn’t care.

Hesitantly, he found a place to sit. If the hospital gown and IV hadn’t already given it away, it was pretty clear that he was a patient, not a visitor. He was scrawny and spindly to the point where it was almost disturbing, his skin was pale and sickly, and the messy bedhead was only slightly offset by the awkward purple hair dye. Why was he out here in the first place, instead of at Ky’s speech?

He knew staring was rude, but he just couldn’t stop himself. Every time he tried, there was another odd little detail that caught his attention. A peculiar little hairclip in the shape of a pink arrow. A purple charm bracelet half-hidden by his standard-issue hospital band. Glittery star stickers on the sides of his handheld, and- hey, he recognized that game!

His expression brightened. “Oh, you play Pocket Beasts too? That’s my favorite! Who’s your starter?”

The only response he got was a couple of button clicks. Sin found himself sinking back into an uncomfortable silence. Well, he supposed it was better than being yelled at. He switched his game on.

Dad said he wasn’t supposed to use the internet at the hospital because it would mess with all the fancy machines, so online matches were out of the question. Well, there was always the battle tower. Maybe he could item grind to kill time. He still needed to finish his Soup Encyclopedia and some of the rare cooking items could only be found there.

Any discomfort he had was wiped away with the familiar music and intro screen of the game. How could he worry when there were battles to be won? All he had to worry about was making the most of his free time.

His avatar flickered into existence, still in the last town he’d visited. As soon as he moved towards the nearest building, though, a little indicator popped up on the bottom of the screen. Puzzled, Sin took his stylus and tapped on the icon.

Trainer BEDMAN would like to battle!

>Accept Decline

‘Bedman?’ He looked up at the little avatar that had appeared, then glanced off to the boy at his side. The messy lavender dye-job was surprisingly close, as was the magenta arrow pinning his bangs out of his eyes. Was it just some weird coincidence? If he wanted to play, he could have just asked…

Despite his confusion, Sin clicked ‘Accept.’ PvP battles were more fun than doing the same grind he had done over and over again. Even if he did lose, it was in a totally unique way.

The usual introductory animations played out as their avatars posed and tossed their first beasts into battle. Sin had to snicker at the disparity between their choices. He always liked sending his biggest and toughest beasts out in the beginning, and pretty much anything looked tiny beside it.

But smaller meant faster, so he wasn’t all that surprised to see the other one attack first. He braced himself for a tough starting move...only to be confused at the sight of a sand cloud being thrown at him.

Enemy Used SAND TOSS!

Accuracy Lowered!

Sand toss? What a waste of a turn! Sin grinned as it switched to his turn. Karate chop, a pretty powerful start, it always hit, and he had the type advantage, what a great way to start a match- !

Attack Missed!

“What!? How did that miss!?”

“Karate chop has a standard accuracy of 100%.” A low, quiet voice spoke up next to him, making Sin practically jump back in shock. “But I lowered your accuracy with sand toss, so now there’s a 15% chance it won’t hit.”

“...Huh.” He looked back at his screen. “Never see people use sand toss out of, like, NPC fights.”

“Most players treat accuracy-modifiers as a waste of time, but if you have a Pocket Beast with a high enough defense, then the turns spent not attacking are made up for when the opponent can barely hit you later.” The strange boy had such a casual tone to his voice, as though they’d been conversing for hours already.

It was a bit jarring, but Sin tried to roll with it. “I guess that does make sense. Sorta like when a beast has the ‘Decoy’ ability and the first attack never hits?”

“Kind of. But a lot of players know which beasts can have Decoy, so they know ahead of time to focus on stat-altering moves or poisoning instead of wasting a turn when they know attacking won’t do anything. Take your turn.”

It took him a moment to process the last bit, but he noticed the battle menu had popped up again. He picked another attack. “Why’d you want to battle me? Did you just pick at random?”

“You were the only opponent available.” Another sand toss. “It’s hard to find people to play with on local, and I’m not allowed to use global matchmaking in my room because it needs an internet connection.”

Sin waited for his two-turn charge move to activate, but before it could be his turn, a swift attack managed to knock his beast out cold. “Damn it! I thought I had that…”

He spotted a triumphant little smirk out of the corner of his eye. “Pocket Beasts is all about tactics. You have to take everything into account. It’s easy to just care about how much damage a move can do, but you’re doomed from the start if you don’t have the right stats, or the best moveset to compliment them.”

He couldn’t help but grin along with him. “Wow, you’re really good at strategy!

‘Bedman’ managed a small, awkward smile. “Well, um, not like I have much else to do…”

“Really?” Sin tilted his head. “I guess it’s good you’ve got something fun to do while you’re here, all this hospital stuff skeeves me out. When do they let you go back home? I dunno how long you’ve been here, but I think I’d go nuts after a couple of days.”

“I’m not sure. I’ve been here a while, already.” A lucky hit from Sin’s beast managed to knock his first one out. “Since...last January, if I remember correctly.”

Last January? Jeez, forget a few days, he was sure he’d be past insanity after a whole year!

Sin donned a look of pity. “That sucks. What’s wrong with you?” The words came out before he could think or realize that it wasn’t an especially nice thing to say. “Uh, shit, sorry-”

“Mmm. It’s okay. At least you don’t mince your words. I have a neurological disorder that affects how my brain processes information. It’s a bit hard to describe. Let’s say a human brain is like a computer, it processes the inputs that are fed into it. Powerful, modern computers can process a lot of information all at once, but if a computer is old, or wasn’t built properly, trying to process too much information can make it overheat and crash.”

“Oh. So how do you keep it from ‘overheating?’”

“Sleep, mostly. I’m only awake for a few hours every day. When I’m awake, and I don’t have tests to do, I like to play games. My sister and I play multiplayer sometimes, but usually I have to play by myself. She has the same problem I do, so a lot of the time one of us is asleep during the times the other’s awake.”

Was it weird to get all this personal information from someone he’d just met? Sin wasn’t sure. But he did like talking to this guy. “Well, want to swap Friend Codes? If we’re registered as friends then local multiplayer should work, then you don’t have to use an internet connection!”

“Where do you live?”

“Central Illyria!” Sin beamed. “Like, half an hour at most. It should still work from there.”

The other boy gave him an odd look. “I’m sure there’s plenty of hospitals closer to you, then. Why did you come out all the way here?”

That got him to roll his eyes, making an exaggerated gagging noise. “My dad. He always drags me along on his charity stuff, carrying boxes and shit. He only let me take a break because he’s making some dumb speech up in the-”

And the regret came just as fast as he saw his companion’s expression shift. He hated the visits, obviously, but he knew it was important to a lot of people. And if someone had been stuck in a hospital for that long, maybe they’d be happy to have someone new come by. He must have come off as such a dick-

Before he could stew on it more, he heard a little laugh. “Yeah. I hate those, too.” Bedman was smiling at him. “You’re Kiske’s kid? That’s got to be awful.”

“Heh. Yeah, it really is.” He rubbed the back of his head. “Never gave you my name, did I? I’m Samson, but everyone just calls me ‘Sin.’”

“I was curious about your name, that does make a bit more logical sense.” His companion nodded. “It’s nice to meet you, Sin.”

“Same! What about you? Can’t imagine your name’s really ‘Bedman,’ is it?”

“More of a screen name, really. My name is-”

“Mattie! Dr. Baldy says you’ve gotta have your IV changed!”

They both jumped at the sudden noise, accompanied by the slam of a door. A girl with shaggy blonde hair and familiar features limped into the courtyard, setting her sights on them as soon as she was visible.

“There you are! I just knew you’d be out here.”

“Well, there’s not many other places I could be…” He said. “When did you wake up?”

“‘bout half an hour ago.” She replied. “Just in time for mom and dad to send me out to look for you.”

The girl’s expression changed when she noticed Sin. “Oh! Mattie, who’s this?”

“Sin, this is my twin sister, Delilah.” ‘Mattie’ pointed to her. “Delilah, this is my...new friend.”

“New friend?” Delilah reached out and shook Sin’s hard with a remarkable amount of strength. “Did my baby bro talk your ear off about his favorite game again?”

“You’re only older by nine minutes, Delilah!”

“He’s really good at Pocket Beasts.” Replied Sin. “It was fun playing with him!”

At that, he realized neither of them had selected anything in a while. He looked down at his screen

TIME UP

DRAW

“Aww, maaaaan…”

“Do we have enough time for another match?” Mattie asked.

“Dr. Baldy looked really serious. We probably can’t make him wait that long.” Delilah shook her head.

Sin tried to bring the mood back up. “Well, we were still gonna swap Friend Codes, right? Then we can play whenever! Either of you have something to write with?”

Delilah pulled a thick black sharpie from her sock. “I have a marker! But no paper…”

“Oh! Hold on a sec.” Sin rolled his jacket sleeve up and held out his arm. Just write it on the back!”

The two of them looked hesitant. “Is that safe?”

“It’s totally fine! It’s a little hard to wash off, but that means it won’t smear before I get home!”

Mattie took the marker and began scribbling on his forearm. “You’re really quite strange, Sin.”

“Thanks!” As soon as the wet feeling on his arm went away, he twisted around to see two series of digits.“What’s this other number?”

“Our phone number. If, um, you ever feel like calling.” Despite his attempts to hide it, Sin could see the faint blush to the other boy’s cheeks. “Do you think you could do one more thing very quickly?”

He couldn’t think of what it could have possibly been. “Yeah?”

“Can you draw something on me? I’ve never done it before. I want to see what it’s like.”

He grinned. “Hell yeah! I’ll try and draw something cool real quick!”

Delilah winced. “You know mom and dad are going to kill you, right?”

“Just say it was my idea!” Sin beamed. Mattie flinched the first time he pressed the marker to his skin, but he managed to still draw a straight line. He couldn’t think of anything in particular to draw, so he settled for a series of sharp, criss-crossing black lines circling his forearm. “How’s that?”

“...woah.” Simple as it was, Mattie looked utterly awestruck. “It’s…

“C’mon, Mattie, we’ve gotta go!” Tired of waiting, Delilah all but dragged him off the wall.

“See ya!” Sin waved as they departed. “You’d better bring your A-game next time we battle, I don’t lose easy!” He folded up his game and tucked it into his back pocket. That was probably his cue to leave, too.

As he hopped off the wall, he could make out a faint voice trailing away to the other side of the courtyard.

“Huh? What’s the deal with you, Mattie? You never look that happy!”

Sin smiled as he turned to leave. Ky was probably waiting for him.

He couldn’t remember the last time he’d been excited for the next visit.

[bronzeflower]

The Opposite of a Fake Relationship

Also on ao3

Chapter 1: The “Introduction”

-----

“The Flying Pigs commissioned me for a few major renovations to their headquarters. Looks like I’m gonna be seeing a lot more of you at work,” Victor informed. “Which means you’re gonna be all serious and authority-like.”

“I have a reputation to keep,” Arlo insisted, and Victor giggled and squished Arlo’s cheeks.

“Yeah, but the moment you look at me, you go all soft and adorable,” Victor’s point was proven immediately by Arlo looking at him with utter adoration. “Everyone’s gonna know we’re married the moment they see us together in any capacity.”

“They have more important things to worry about than my marital status.”

“Sure they do.” Victor gave Arlo a quick kiss. “I’ll see you later today if everything goes well. Make sure the kids get to school safe and on time.”

“Like they’d allow for us to be late by even a minute,” Arlo joked. “Remi has started to a big stickler about what time they actually arrive at school. She said, and I quote, ‘They have to be there at 7:40 at the latest otherwise they’ll die.’”

“She’s always been dramatic.”

“Dad! We’re going to be late!” Remi yelled. “Let’s go! Let’s go! Let’s go!”

“I’m coming!” Arlo responded. “Bye, darling.”

“Bye, bye,” Victor kissed Arlo again, and he smiled as he heard Sam complain about how school started at 8:00, so there was no way they were going to be late, with Remi reminding him that death would imminent if they were, so it was always best to be early to avoid even the possibility.

Victor didn’t know where Remi got the idea that she and her brother would die if they were even a minute late to school, but it got them out of bed in the morning, so he supposed it was an improvement on Remi and Sam refusing to even acknowledge the world when it was early.

After waving off his husband and kids, it was time for Victor to get to work. This was a big commission, and there were a lot of materials to gather.

Of course, the Flying Pigs would never dumb down on defense, so Victor ended up feeling like he was gathering materials for making reinforcements rather than an entire expansion to the building.

It took about a week for Victor to gather and craft all the materials he needed, even with the materials he already had, but he had finally done it, and, for that, he was glad.

Now, all that was left was bringing the materials over to the Flying Pigs to get started on the expansion.

Victor was giddy, excited to build and excited to see his husband at his workplace.

But, of course, Victor had to get through security first, which was stringent for good reason. Regardless, Victor managed to get in, and someone showed up to bring him to where he was building the expansion.

His name was Barin, and he was weirdly nervous, but he was generally friendly and pointed out things and people they came across.

“Th-that over there is Arlo,” Barin pointed towards where Arlo was training with other Flying Pigs members. “You’ve probably he-heard of him. He’s one of the strongest folks over, over here.”

“So are you going to introduce me?” Victor asked kind of as a joke, but Barin frantically nodded and awkwardly tried to get Arlo’s attention.

“Arlo, e-excuse me,” Barin had his arms out slightly, as if warding off anything that would try and hurt him.

A girl with long black hair that was set in a ponytail looked up from her stretches to glare towards Barin before turning her head towards Arlo.

“Arlo!” She barked. “There’s some new kid in here!”

Arlo looked over, and Victor grinned at him, waving hello.

“Y-yes, this is the builder who’s g-going to be working on the new expansion,” Barin explained. “So-sorry, I forgot your name. What was it again?”

“Victor! Victor of the Victory Workshop. It’s good to meet you,” Victor threw Arlo a wink, and he didn’t miss the way Arlo’s mouth turned up slightly.

“Arlo, member of the Flying Pigs.”

Victor and Arlo shook hands, and Victor gave Arlo a challenging grin.

“Barin over here was telling me how you were one of the strongest folks in this joint. Care to demonstrate?”

Barin looked absolutely mortified while the girl with the long ponytail let out a loud laugh.

“I like this kid! Name’s Aureall. Good to meet you.”

“I’ve got a least a decade on you, Aureall,” Victor pointed out, but Aureall didn’t really seem to care, so he focused his attention back on Arlo. “So, what do you say? How’s a sparring match between men?”

“Don’t you have an expansion to build?” Arlo said in what probably sounded like his usual serious voice to others, but Victor could detect the hint of amusement in there.

“Just one sparring match. One minute. No weapons,” Victor laid out their typical sparring rules. “I’ve got the time.”

“Are you sure? I don’t hold back, and I wouldn’t want to leave you incapable of doing your job,” Arlo teased, and Victor found himself laughing.

“Lucky for you, I don’t hold back either,” Victor got into a subtle fighting stance. “I’d be offended if you did.”

“A-Arlo! Pl-please don’t spar him!” Barin begged. “He’s just a builder-I-I doubt he can go up against you without getting hurt!”

“If you’re worried, I can spar you first,” Victor suggested. “I think you’re a lot stronger than you let on.”

“No sparring!” Barin demanded, and Aureall protested.

“I wanna see Arlo kick some nobody’s butt.”

“Don’t assume someone’s strength before you fight them,” Arlo advised. “That’s a good way to lose.”

“Does that mean you’ll accept?”

“Don’t hold back,” Arlo got into a fighting stance, and Victor’s grin turned manic.

“Like I’d ever.”

Victor was very familiar with Arlo’s moveset, and he wondered if it was obvious from watching them spar that he knew exactly when to move to avoid getting hit and where exactly to aim for to do the most damage.

Of course, the same could be said for Arlo, and it was a hard battle full of blocking and dodging and landing hits. Victor was pretty sure Arlo was trying even harder than usual in an attempt to look good in front of his coworkers.

However, in the end, Victor was merciless and managed to be victorious.

“Thanks for the sparring match!” Victor declared. “Maybe we could do a rematch sometime, but I’ve got work to do now. Hey, Barin, show me the rest of the way.”

Victor left, and Arlo couldn’t help but watch him as he left the area. It felt a little weird to say goodbye without exchanging at least one kiss, if not more, but, then again, this place wasn’t exactly the most appropriate area for PDA.

“Wow, in love already?” Aureall teased. “Didn’t strike you as a man who believed in love at first sight.”

“I don’t,” Arlo shook his head.

“That was an impressive battle,” Helene spoke up. “I kind of want to spar him myself now…”

“Me too!” Aureall agreed. “Next time he rears his head around here, I’m gonna beat him up so hard!”

“You sound like a school bully,” Helene said. “And besides, what makes you think that you can beat him? Even Arlo lost against him.”

“He only sparred Arlo!” Aureall claimed. “And weren’t you considering sparring him too? Why get into a fight that you’re so sure you’ll lose?”

“He had an interesting fighting style. I want to see it up close.”

“Why don’t you stop talking about him and get back to training?” Arlo interrupted, back to being serious.

“What, jealous?” Aureall joked, but she and Helene got back to work after a glare from Arlo.

Arlo and Victor talked about what happened that day when Arlo got back from work.

“We should probably tell them that we’re married,” Arlo suggested.

“But, consider this, it’s hilarious to make them think we’ve never met before,” Victor countered with a grin. “And it’s not like it’s interfering with anything.”

“I won’t deny that it’s amusing, but it is a little on the unethical side.”

“We can always just say that we wanted to stay professional in the workplace,” Victor pointed out. “You know, for when people do find out. But I wanna see how long it takes people to do so in the first place.”

“I guess it would be a good lesson in observation,” Arlo reasoned. “Alright. So what’s the plan?”

“We interact with each other relatively normally, with the exception that we will be keeping everything workplace appropriate.”

“Sparring me wasn’t exactly workplace appropriate.”

“Of course it is! It’s the Flying Pigs!”

“Aureall and Helene really want to spar you now,” Arlo mentioned, and Victor smiled.

“Tell them I’ll spar with them next time I see them. It’ll be on sight.”

“You should give them more warning than that.”

“Maybe, especially if we wanna keep up the idea that we don’t know each other outside of work.”

“Aureall already thinks that it was love at first sight.”

“Oh my god, that’s so funny,” Victor laughed. “But not that too far off. We pretty much got married as soon as we had the downtime. And now we’ve been married for, what? Almost ten years?”

“I think I lost count after the fifth year.”

“Honestly, me too,” Victor nodded. “But I don’t think I’ll ever forget how I fell for you.”

“Yeah, and how did you fall for me?” Arlo asked even though he almost certainly knew.

“When you asked me to join you in training for the Flying Pigs and had me run all around Portia for a week,” Victor started. “And you told me about your dream of joining the Flying Pigs, and that’s when I fell for you.”

“Liar,” Arlo poked Victor, and he laughed.

“You’re right, I fell for you when we were eating at the Round Table, and I made you laugh so hard that milk came out of your nose.”

“Maybe it’s a good thing we’re keeping our relationship from the Flying Pigs. You have to avoid telling that story to everyone you meet.”

“Oh my god, you’re right. Now I can’t decide what’s better - fooling everyone into thinking we’ve never met before or embarrassing the hell out of you with terrible stories. Whatever shall I do?”

“You can wait until people figure out we’re married.”

“You’re a genius, and I love you.”

“Love you too, darling.”

“Dad! I’m hungry!” Sam came clamoring in just as Arlo was leaning down for a kiss. “Ew. You’re being gross.”

Sam stuck his tongue out, and Victor let out a soft laugh as he pulled away from Arlo.

“Well, my dear and beloved child, what would you like for dinner?” Victor asked. “We’ve got the ingredients for seafood noodles or for bamboo papaya and seafood with rice.”

“Hmm,” Sam thought very seriously. “Noodles. Oh! And can we have some stewed mushrooms?”

“Of course!” Victor responded. “Would you like to help me prepare our meal? And ask your sister if she’d like to help as well.”

Sam nodded and left to go inform Remi of how it was time to start making dinner.

“Alright, babe, the children demand sacrifice, so I’ve got to go.”

“When are you gonna stop calling dinner sacrifice?”

“Never.”

Victor swept at Arlo’s leg to knock him slightly off balance and kissed him once Arlo was low enough.

“I regret you becoming friends with Sam and Remington,” Arlo stated when the kiss was over.

“They’re your friends too,” Victor responded. “But, anyway, the children are hungry, and they’ve got to eat, and so do we.”

“I’ll join you in cooking this time,” Arlo offered, and Victor smiled.

“Sure, we’ll have the whole family cooking together. Make sure Remi uses the knife safely. I’m gonna put Sam on stewing duty.”

Cooking dinner was generally chaotic, with Sam getting impatient often with waiting for the food to cook, Remi generally not have a great idea of knife safety, and Arlo simply not being all that great of a cook, but, in the end, they made something delicious, and they had a lovely dinner together.