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evilminji · 21 days ago

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Had another Si-Oc thought >.>

My standard "you know what Would Be Cool?" Musings...

Getting reborn, as you do, ending up Force Sensitive, as can only be the case. Because really... how ELSE would you soul end up there? CHANCE? Force ghosts are a PROVEN thing! We KNOW that the Force sometimes just... deals in souls.

Ffs, it MADE A BABY.

Yes, there was Sith interference there. But that doesn't chance the fact that it went? "Eh, good enough. I'll take the chance and run with it. Thanks~☆ Mine Now~~☆ Bye~~~☆" And Chosen One'd that baby. Because ultimately? Before the plans of gods and men? The Force Laughs.

So like? Yeah. If there WAS to be a Reincarnator?

Probably the Force.

Congrats on the new, third (or second, depends on your species. Might be another number entirely, honestly. But we are averaging here so MOVE ON), Parent! They are very, very happy to see you! Love you as only a Primordial, Extradimensional, Timeless, Formless, All Pervasive, Orange-Blue Morality havin', Not-A-God Super-God CAN. Their Benevolence? Could be called another God's cruelty.

They don't MEAN too. They are just.... really, really Big. Infinite. Not organic or mortal. It's like trying to comprehend the limitations of an ant, living on a planet, circling a sun, in a GALAXY the size of a DUST MOTE. The fact that the Force can even come CLOSE? Is literally miraculous.

But of course... OC? Not the Chosen One. The favorite, special, "I have Important Things For You" child. Which.... turns out to actually? Be kinda great. The realize that quickly. Which of course, is followed by the logical follow up.

Anikin? Fuckin SCREWED. Because he IS the Favorite Child.

Oh... oh No. Oh Fuck, that is a CHILD.

How easy it is, to cast blame, to judge, when you can't FEEL the Force in your EVERYTHING. All the time. Every moment of every day. Beautiful but cacophonous, like a symphony of screaming. Like staring at the sun and never going blind. It still hurts. But it's so... so bright. So Beautiful.

Connection. To the universe itself. Soul deep and transcendent. You can feel that the universe loves you. That there is good in people. That Life itself is worth protecting. But at the same time? It is... it is so much.

Because you can FEEL the ugly too.

The greed. The hate. The suffering. Lights snuffed out, in dark places of despair. Selfish actions and deep cruelties, like barbed wire against the soul. Thorns that hook and drag. And... and you're supposed to use your words. Just... just ASK them to stop? And, What? Hope that they WILL?

It HURTS!

But pain only begets more pain. Cruelty, more cruelties still. And only the Sith, believe they can use FORCE, in any sense of the word, to change a persons nature. The Jedi build. Grow. They work together, with those who are willing, towards something better. Defend, those who can not protect themselves.

Balance and growth. Not fire and chains.

And Oc is pretty sure Anikin will agree. No one should ever be in chains. Dead maybe. Or in jail. But never, ever, in chains. (And no one ever said they were pacifists. Just not war mongers. Sometimes the only answer IS to kill your opponent. To respect their choice, but honor your commitments. Protect those you swore to protect.)

Of course... OC? Going through Jedi training. It's Pre-Anikin days. Both she and Obi-Wan are fuckin Smol. She's not even in his Creche clan. She's over here in the "wanders off, lost in their own thoughts" Chill AF Creche Clan. Not Mr. "May you Live In Interesting Times And Have Padawans JUST LIKE YOOOOOOOU" and Co., over in the... "Energetic" Creche Clan.

None of HER Creche-mates BIT people, Obi-Wan.

WE keep our fuckin teeth to ourselves, Kenobi!

So, obviously, THEY don't have a lifetime ban on the "look, don't touch" fragile plants meditation garden. Very Rich in the Force. Good for focusing. Peaceful, really. And Oc? Has the time and space? To Consider™ things. Experiment. Ponder Fandom theories. Long "lost" Cannon techniques. Maybe have one-sided chats with the Force.

.....finally get CURIOUS™.

And wonder... if? Since, you know, through the Force, she can encourage and discourage plants to grow? And somewhat control animals. Why not... micro-organisms? Say, Midi-chlorians? Force healing is all ready a thing! So the Force all ready CAN interact with the body. Effect it. Change it. What is this, but more?

Really, all she'd have to do is find them, within herself, right? They're already a part of her! Yet... not. Do they consider themselves a part of her? Or is it symbiosis? Yeah, everyone says it can't be done. Perhaps shouldn't be done. But, frankly? They said the same about a LOT of Force techniques over the years. Big leaps in progress scare the SHIT out of folks. Cause if you miss? A LOT of people can die gorey.

So she sits. Mediates. Looks. Smaller... and smaller.... and smaller....

Until she finds whispers. Humming. Chatter.

As though each and every blood cell in her body had a teeny, tiny, whispery little voice. All chattering together, talking and arguing and discussing. One great hive of progress and industry. Complaining about a lack of potassium... huh. She goes and gets some fruit. Eats it. Then settles back into meditation.

They are JOYOUS! Potassium! Yaaaaay! ᐠ( ᐛ )ᐟᐠ( ᐛ )ᐟᐠ( ᐛ )ᐟᐠ( ᐛ )ᐟᐠ( ᐛ )ᐟ

Well... what'd ya know... huh. Hello there? She tries. Only to get a whispery and very alarmed ( ˶°ㅁ°) !! BODY CAN TALKヽ(°〇°)ﾉ ‽‽‽ Y-Yeah... she can. (How are they doing that?) The conversation? Only gets more surreal from there. Filled with... a surprising number of kaomojis.

But! She DOES figure out? How to increase her Midi-chlorians count. (By asking. Supplying needed resources for the expansion.) And WITH it? He awareness blooms.

The headache is... awful. The little guys(genderless) are WAY to enthusiastic. Working way too fast. If she didn't check the next morning? They might have continued to increase, indefinitely, until her veins were SOLID midi-chlorian. They just want to HELP, you see. And if you want More? Then surely FAR TOO MUCH is better, right?

(She may have fucked up. Oh god. Ow. Fuck. OW.)

Eventually she figure it out. Only gives her healer in training Creche mate a... few near heart attacks. He'll TOTALLY forgive her! (He will not. What the FUCK OC. Experimental medical procedures?! On YOURSELF!? You're not even HEALER TRACK!!!)

So NOW? She can reliably do it to OTHERS.

Need a bit more Midi-chlorians? Nearly Jedi quality but juuuuust under that cut off? She can fix that. Come. Be a jedi. Everyone should be a jedi. In FACT~! Whoops! Oh hey. Looks like all these Midi-chlorian counters are fuckin broken! (They look perfect fi-)(Broken! :] Do Not question me) So when you find that Orohan Child in desperate need of love and care? Just bring um on back!

They're TOTALLY Force sensitive. You can just tell. It's the vibes. Look at their lil face. Vibes, man. Just hand um here. For... reasons. You go get the paperwork. A working tester. And~? Oh would you look at THAT! Perfectly within acceptance range! Neat. Called it again, didn't you, Master Koon? You really do have an eye for these things. Anyway~ off to get this little one settled~~☆ *adoring cooing noises at the baby*

Weird, huh, how there suddenly just... SO MANY random orphan babies that are force sensitive? How 'bout that >.> strangest thing.

Of course, it's a god damned open secret. Everyone KNOWS. How could they not? But? Like with most things? If they don't Officially Know™? They don't have to stop it. And it DOES help both the Force AND those kids. Can be reversed if they don't like it, later. (They asked. All hypothetical of course.) So OC is basically Temple bound, so she can receive any new kiddos. To... you know... Check Their Health, on the way to ACTUAL healers.

But she's ALSO waiting. And as her skill increases? She can FEEL midi-chlorians, easier and easier. Until it gets to the point? Where if she's bored and zoning out? Not even ture meditation anymore? She accidentally tunes into Midi-chlorian Live~☆ the talk show. (What's the latest gossip from bodies nearest to her? Oh? Your second spleen is acting funny? Better remember to tell him to get that chec-)

Palpatine can't hide SHIT. It's literally in his blood.

And MAD at him.

This is NOT what they're FOR. He's taking TERRIBLE care of his body! Fuck you! Fuck you, fuck you, FUCK YOOOOOOU! You want power? Choke on it, you-!!!!!

Holy shit. So THATS what Sith Midi-chlorians feel like. Oh my god. They... they are SO MAD. Like tiny wasps. That have been violently shaken in a jar. She's never used the word "seething" in reference to someone before... but like...? If they COULD stab him? Man would be a thick paste at this point.

She's not sure what facial expression she makes. But it sure is obvious. As is the blatant, horrified staring. And refusal to get near him. HE doesn't notice, being to busy with the powerful. But the Jedi sure as fuck do. Because THEY sent her? Out with a Shadow. You know... just in case.

Cause she literally can not be replaced.

She not High Ranked... she's just priceless. Equal sort of significance, but in a very quiet, Soft Power sort of way. She is, after all, single handedly? Reversing centuries of slow population decline. Her entire Line promises to be the next Yoda's line. Priceless and with far reaching significance. So obviously, they're making sure that shit stays locked down.

No one is to so much as BREATHE about this.

Not until her great-great-GREAT Grand Padawan has passed their Knight Trials so HELP US. We LEARN from our mistakes! Need we bring out the records? Times we got cocky? Sith and political fuckery!? No. Oc stays INVISIBLE. There is no war in Ba Sing Se! Move along!

So like? Why is Miss Midi-chlorian Sensor and Future of the Jedi... making that face? She's literally NEVER made that face. What sort of monster do you have to BE? Huh? Shadow asks, casual as fuck, like he's not a plotting plotter who's planing terrible things, what's up?

She tells him. Palpatine has RANCID vibes. His midi-chlorians fucking DISPISE him. She's literally never seen that before. In anyone. Didn't even know that was an option. They would gleefully kill him if they could.

.....senator Palpatine is Force Sensitive?

Yes.

.......Interesting™(Ominous Intent)

Says local Shadow, who is perhaps putting together some dots. May not be getting the correct picture. But is getting the Vibe. And boy howdy, he does NOT like the vibe. Has got himself some questions. Cause Mr "uwu I'm harmless" lil mask? Only holds up? If you're willing to believe him.

Shadows don't buy that shit. Shadows? Need receipts. Full character statements and an audit on the fucking hospital you were BORN AT. Every credit you picked up off the side walk, why, and where you spent it.

Give them your Secrets. Or they'll keep digging until they find them.

uwu Their ASS. Gonna tear this bitch APART.

......huh. So THIS is why you guys keep accidentally getting married to Mandalorians on missions. (We agreed not to mention that.) (Fucker, I agreed to nothing. Shouldn't have eaten my special Me Day pudding if you didn't want me to gossip.) Man, her friends are... a trip. Uh... have fun? Happy hunting? I guess? *feral Jedi noises*

She? Continues to wait. Palpatine? Begins to have a VERY bad time. (Ha! Get fucked!)

Unfortunately, it's not fast enough to stop his dumbass plans. He just gets desperate. Figures more power is the answer. Because of course he does. So here comes the "oh nooooo~ my planets under attack~ better manipulate a child and make me president of the galaxy!" Plan. Fucker. Bastard.

She can't stop that.

But what she CAN do? Is be there. Waiting. For HIM.

Her little brother. Her son. Her center of the universe. The most important man to ever live... and also? A scared little boy. Far, far from home. The only other person who understands just how BIG the Force is. How much it weighs. How even as it crushs you... you can't bear to put it down. Not even for a moment. Because it loves you. And it hurts, that it does.

And... oh. Oh.

He is so very small.

Dirty, tired, in lovingly mended clothes that are barely beyond scrap. With bright, bright eyes like hope and starlight. He sings inside. Like freedom. Like hope. Daring to ask "why CAN'T you be kinder?", "why CAN'T we be free?". A storm of change. Bright and beautiful.

A child. Great and small, all at once.

Oc can't help but smile. Because, oh. Oh how long, she has waited to meet him, Anikin Skywalker. Welcome. Are you hungry? Cold? Let's get cleaned up. See the healers first. The council can wait.

Chips are removed and food is shared. Warm clothes, soft and new. And she can not help but smile, smile, smile. Even as her face begins to hurt. For years she has gathered. Planned. Studied and trained. As though some part of her knew. As though all for this moment. Taking one of those small hands in hers. Looking right in his eyes.

"It's going to be okay."

Because it IS. Because regardless of what they decide? OC will be with him. Regardless, she's going to go and make sure his mother is free. Not bought, not sold. Free. She has friends who can help. Will learn how to remove the chip herself if she must.

And? He IS going to be a Jedi. Even if he never become a Coruscant Jedi. Even if he decides he doesn't agree with how they do things or they decide the disagree with how HE does things. The Jedi have changed before, they will change again. Living things are meant to grow. Meant to change. And people can be both wrong and right at the same time. It's messy.

But what's important? Is Anikin is not alone anymore. And Oc is gonna help teach him. And someday? HE'S gonna break chains. So many chains. Gonna help people heal. If he wants to. (He does) But for right now? A quick talk with some old people. Maybe a nap. And we either get settled or arrange a trip back to Tatooine. To pick up your mom. In the meantime! You can figure out what classes she might wanna take. Where seems like a good place to settle. *chatting as they walk off, hand in hand*

Just? Sometimes a Padawan-ship is you, your Teacher, your OTHER Teacher, and her body guards that teach you Cool Knife Tricks and how to gamble, behind Obi-Wan's back! :D

@legitimatesatanspawn @mayfay @leftnotright @babbling-babull @hdgnj @spidori @the-witchhunter @lolottes

#minji's writing #Chosen Family AU #star wars #anikin skywalker #star wars oc #star wars si oc #long post #i chose to believe that Shadows are the Feral Jedis #let them BITE #who gave Anikin a knife?#vos obviously #you'd THINK Thome is the level headed one #but thats a fuckin LIE #they know the truth #he just mastered the I Am A Calm Professional face #you know... Like a LIAR

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nfumbewalk · 7 months ago

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Hmm.

Here is a nice altar picture, though I blocked the sigils drawn on the candles. No one's business but my client.

Don't know what to think...lost a follower. Oh well! I move on. Gen X'er types like me don't really give a shit. 😂 One candle is white, one is yellow

Things are so great on the magic & muerto fronts! My magic with Rodolfo is spot on with our client. She asked for longer work because she loves the energy she's getting! Nice. I'm using 7 candles & 6 glasses of water and the power is so strong. When alone, I generally use 3 glasses of water & 4 candles, but more if using a circle spread.

The ones pictured here are in a semi-triangular form, though it's hard to see from the photo. When triangles are used, it signifies "putting the muertos to work." I learned this from a book on espiritismo. A good one! One that I read recently, "Mesa Blanca" Is a recent shit book!! Anyhoo! Good thing it was Kindle Unlimited! This has saved me tons of money!!

Some may wonder why water and so much of it, and the same with the candles? The water quenches the spiritual thirst of the muertos, it helps their desires become clear, and also gives them enough emotional fortitude to stay and visit. The flames give them life energy and sustenance for as long as they can visit. No one knows about this, because I've received this from the muertos from channeling as I write.

I'm going to drop some info to my therapist. He's very, very interested. I was thinking the other day - ppl seem into necromancy these days, but in the occult field, NO one is REALLY doing the REAL thing! Yeah - talk to the muertos & it *may* work - your planchette on your Ouija may move. But does a solid muerto walk behind you and whisper "Howdy," in your ear, while feeling his hot breath? Or scratch at the bathroom door trying to rouse you for attention? My muerto is well behaved. Some may not be.

I'm getting more ideas for my book and I'm jotting things down. It's going to be an almost massive feat to get my book going but...my husband just started updating his freaking *sweet* laptop for me!! Woot! 😁 It's not brand new but it was only lightly used & it's a ThinkPad! 💖 Love those since I had a 286 or 386 version back in the 90's! Now I'll have a legit word processor. Cool!

So, ppl probably wonder why ppl like me love muertos. Hard to explain, really. It can get spooky at times, but not for me. I'm not scared of any muerto. I've encountered Rodolfo's muerto friends.

And a ton of other muertos! When you're as psychic as me, you get used to this stuff eventually. Ppl get super interested when I mention my close touches with death & Santa Muerte. Just two life changing events, but very serious and REAL af! Both experiences changed me.

And my traumatic jail experience as well. 2 weeks is enough! One reason for my therapy visits. I lost a very thick head of hair - now I have very thin, long hair. It didn't grow back like it did after the 2 week coma. Yes, it's 2 weeks with me for some strange fucking reason. 🤷 A hair dresser told me that with trauma, the hair takes a rest. Then when things are no longer a threat, the hair resumes growth. Then you shed hair. It's supposed to come back. After jail, it fell out & never resumed. Sooo...very rarely, I wear my hair down. It's embarrassing.

Welp, that's exposing myself! Oh, I don't care! Might as well be honest because I expect honesty back from others. I despise liars. Like one of my favorite musicians, Johnny Rotten (John Lydon). He had a song about liars. I agree with him. He's an ex-pat Republican. Love him. 💖 Some hate him. Don't care! Music? I'll say: The longest is:

The Rolling Stones, don't even touch their ancient asses! I was raised, fed, and indoctrinated with The Stones since I was born. I know just about everything about the band history. Stones geek. My favorite Stone is Keith Richards (or Richard, in the early 60's). Fuck the Beatles. My mom said the Stones were "dirty and uncouth" and ppl didn't agree with their image & sex appeal. She loved them because of this and her pen pal in England sent her lots of clippings from the papers and magazines about the Stones.

I love: Sisters of Mercy, Joy Division, The Damned, Siouxsie & the Banshees, PiL (Public Image Limited), Southern Death Cult/Death Cult/The Cult, Bauhaus, Peter Murphy, Tones on Tail, Love & Rockets & lots of 90's gothic & industrial like Switchblade Symphony, London After Midnight, Corpus Delicti, Sunshine Blind, Voodoo Church, NIN, Frontline Assembly, Crystal Method & Chemical Brothers. :wumpscut: too, but they're a bit later.

How the fuck did I get on this topic? Hell knows!

Need to talk more necro!

So it goes! 💖💀💖

#witchy vibes #witchblr #necromancy #muerto #goth #witchcraft #witch aesthetic #ramblings #horrible experiences #santa muerte

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true-blue-megamind · 2 years ago

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I have a question. I don't know if this has been asked this before. Why does Roxanne fall for Megamind? I'm crazy happy they end up together but I still wonder why? Most people were scared of him until he saved the day. He kidnapped Roxanne all the time. She was super pissed at him for a while there. He's also not human. How does the whole attraction thing even work when you aren't the same species? Because, yeah, Megs is cool af, but an ET with blue skin and a big head probably wasn't the star of many Metro City girl's wet dreams. Maybe after he started the hero gig since people are just like that but not before. But Roxanne kind of flirted with him before he turned good or anything. So I guess she had to see something in him other people didn't. What do you think it was?

MEGAMIND FAN THEORY THURSDAY: Roxanne’s Attraction

Yes, I’m back again with another Megamind Fan Theory Thursday! Special thanks to this week’s anonymous contributor! I appreciate you, whoever you may be! I also want to express my sincere gratitude to all those who read, like, and reblog these posts… Knowing that you share the love for this fandom is the reason why I continue dedicating time, whenever possible, to researching and writing about these theories. This blog wouldn’t exist without you. Thank you!

If, however, you are that one individual who has inexplicably insisted upon reading two years' worth of articles about a film you still haven’t watched… I continue to have faith you’ll one day see the light. Or at least the movie. Hope springs eternal.

In the meantime: SPOILER WARNING!

We’re all human—at least, I assume most people reading this probably are—and that means we’re imperfect. One of the sadly common flaws of our species is a tendency to be rather judgmental, sometimes without just cause, and we certainly see that occurring in the film Megamind. After all, the alien genius was left to be raised in a high-security jail among presumably dangerous inmates simply due to his appearance and was pressured into supervillainy in part because he was different. Given that fact, along with the fear and ostracization many apparently showed him, there is reason to wonder exactly what first attracted Roxanne Ritchi to the blue man. After all, as today’s contributor pointed out, most humans, if asked to describe their perfect match, might not immediately default to “an alien with a large head and a complexion of a popular primary color, as a random nonspecific example.” Yet Roxanne is most certainly attracted to Megamind. Of course, many fan suggest that she must find him handsome—it’s doubtful she’d be in a romantic relationship with him by the end of the film if she thought him ugly—but they also contend that, given her disinterest in Metroman, the attraction must be more than physical. The question is: what qualities made her fall for him rather than an ordinary human or the supposedly perfect former Defender? Can fan theories shed any light? Let’s take a look!

Not Your Average Damsel

Some may be tempted to suggest that this is merely a typical case of the damsel falling for her rescuer. After all, that’s one of the common superhero tropes, isn’t it? Even Megamind himself, while talking to Titan after training, said that saving a lady was the way to her heart. The problem with this is that, in that particular instance, the blue man was completely and undeniably wrong. His love interest’s attraction had little or nothing to do with him whisking her out of Titan’s murderous clutches.

There are three reasons why fan theories rightfully dispute the concept of Megamind and Roxanne sharing a stereotypical hero/damsel romance. Firstly, the movie itself is well known for subverting superhero genre norms, and indeed that seems to have been one of the major themes of the narrative. Given how much effort was put into turning such conventions on their heads, sometimes even lampooning them, it’s extremely doubtful that the film’s creators would have suddenly adopted such stereotypes in this one case.

Secondly, there is Roxanne herself. This character is spunky, independent, and not easily cowed. During Megamind and Titan’s second fight, we see her holding a broken street sign, preparing to join in the fray. That’s a far cry from the expected behavior of a supposedly helpless damsel. Furthermore, despite being rescued by Metroman multiple times—hundreds, in fact, according to the prequel comic The Reign of Megamind—she states outright that they “were never a couple.” That alone clearly dismisses the idea of Roxanne swooning for the blue man simply because he rescues her. If she were the sort to do that, she would have fallen for Metroman as well—especially considering that most of the people around her apparently believed him to be Mr. Perfect.

The third and final reason is one we’ve touched on before. It bears repeating, however, as it truly puts the proverbial nail in the coffin of the Typical Damsel argument. As our contributor mentioned, Roxanne canonically was attracted to Megamind while he was still a supervillain. During the kidnapping scene, when the blue man draws close and practically purrs a vaguely suggestive line—“such… tricks won’t work on me”—in the reporter’s ear, rather than showing reluctance she asks him to “please talk slower.” Megamind, of course, responds by calling her “Temptress.” Tellingly, while she doesn’t acknowledge it, Roxanne also doesn’t object to the epithet. Fan theories suggest that this obviously indicates there was already attraction on both sides, although its extremely doubtful either would have ever acted upon it. (As a well-known television reporter, Roxanne may have been too well aware of the potential destruction of her career, and Megamind, despite having her at his mercy numerous times, was obviously too goodhearted to make a move without invitation. You can read more about the latter in Megamind and Masculinity.)

Smart is Hot

This, then, leaves us with the question of exactly what did attract Roxanne to Megamind. Does she simply have a thing for blue aliens, or is it something more than that? One fan theory suggests that the answer lies in a line that was cut from the final version of the screenplay. Initially, after telling Megamind, who was then disguised as Bernard, that Metroman had never been her type, she added that she’d always preferred brains over brawn. That is interesting because intelligence is certainly something the former supervillain has in abundance. In a previous Fan Theory Thursday post, Why Kidnap Roxanne, we explored the likelihood of Megamind’s clearly ingenious species being naturally attracted to intellect. The thing is that he may not have been the only one. Merriam-Webster defines the term sapiosexual as someone who experiences “sexual or romantic attraction to highly intelligent people.” As you can guess from the mere fact that this word exists, it is fully possible for some humans to possess this inborn predisposition. Many fans believe that Roxanne Ritchi is, indeed, a sapiosexual, and this may be one reason why she would fall head-over-heels for a super-genius, alien or otherwise. In fact, as discussed in How Smart is Megamind, the blue man may quite literally be the smartest person on Earth, making him extremely alluring to someone already attracted by brilliance.

Indeed, according to fan theories, several things about Roxanne’s character support this idea. She was originally imagined as an investigative reporter, so she’s obviously not stupid. She appears to dislike Hal not based upon his appearance but rather due to his lack of intelligence and his constant harassment. Perhaps the most telling evidence, however, comes from comparing her reactions to Megamind and his former nemesis. As mentioned before, Metroman is supposed to be most people’s idea of masculine perfection. Simply look at the way his fans, especially the female ones, behave during the opening of his museum. Add to this the fact that he is largely based on Superman and Elvis Presley—both of whom were, at one time, considered extremely handsome—and we can safely assume that Metroman is supposed to be some sort of Adonis. He’s also wealthy, famous, and powerful; three qualities that many people might consider great advantages in a potential boyfriend. Nonetheless, Roxanne Ritchi shows no interest at all in him.

Conversely, while dating Megamind in his guise as “Bernard,” the woman’s attention—and perhaps her heart—seem to be captured by his conversation, intellect, wit, and humor. She initially begins spending time with him because she believes him to possess expert knowledge concerning Megamind as well as enough intelligence to help her decipher the supervillain’s plan. She clearly enjoys having long conversations with him, laughing at his humorous stories, and reading books together in a library. Granted, the last was done for research purposes in the film, but the Bad Blue Brilliant comics show Megamind and Roxanne planning a date at a library after the blue man has become a hero. Obviously a shared love of books was something Roxanne liked about him. It appears that such traits attracted the reporter while riches and model-perfect looks couldn’t.

Of course, Roxanne rejects the former villain after she learns who he really is, but one Megamind fan theory suggests that that was almost certainly not because of him, but rather because of his actions. It makes sense. She is hurt and infuriated that he lied to her, and she makes her objections to some of his past behaviors known in no uncertain terms. However, when considering the charges she lays at his proverbial doorstep, it’s clear that what she cannot abide is his criminal behavior. She accuses him of murder, taking control of the city, and tricking her. Furthermore, she seems convinced that his only purpose in disguising himself was to toy with her emotions for his own sadistic amusement.

As the film progresses, however, she realizes that he did not actually kill Metroman and that he was sincere about their relationship. That, in turn, removes many of her objections and creates room for her love to grow once more. Indeed, when Megamind, obviously upset, mentions their breakup while they are driving to Metroman’s hideout, Roxanne briefly displays a sorrowful expression before apparently hardening her resolve and slamming on the breaks. (This was likely because she still thought the former villain guilty of murder.) Furthermore, during this unused clip cut from the final film, while taunting his captive, Titan refers to Megamind as Roxanne’s boyfriend, and she doesn’t correct him. Moments later, when he tells the woman to summon her hero, she doesn’t hesitate to issue a heartfelt plea to Megamind. When she sees the blue man make his grand entrance, the look on Roxanne’s face says clearly that she knew he would come. When she believes Megamind to be wounded, Roxanne weeps, and when he, at last, takes up the position of Defender, she kisses his cheek. It seems the woman has grown to trust and love the former Master of All Villainy.

It’s What’s Inside That Counts

Megamind’s intelligence is likely not the only reason Roxanne finds herself falling for him. Many fan theories suggest that his personality was also a driving factor. As mentioned before, he is funny and likable during their dates. When they ride bikes together, he’s clearly having fun, and that makes him fun to be around. While dining out, just before the kiss and the holowatch’s malfunction, he obviously charms her. Even before that, however, the blue man seems to display some very positive traits. His mourning his nemesis, laughing with Minion, and playing with the brainbots all evince a kind heart hidden beneath the black leather and spikes. That same trait continues to appear throughout the film. Later in the narrative, during Titan's attack, Megamind displays a concern for the people of Metro City despite those same people having ostracized him all his life. He is manifestly not as evil as he tries to appear. In fact, his treatment of his damsel offers further proof of this. While he has Roxanne tied up in his Lair as bait for Metroman, it becomes obvious that Megamind’s so-called doom devices have been carefully calibrated not to actually harm the woman, and she seems to know it as she shows no fear. She even seems to enjoy her situation sometimes. When Megamind makes a veiled Star Wars reference, Roxanne smirks as if she’s trying not to laugh.

Thus it appears extremely likely that, from the start of the movie, the reporter already knew Megamind was too good a person to actually hurt her and it seems she appreciated his geeky humor. This is hardly surprising. According to the prequel comic, The Reign of Megamind, he has had more than 600 failed plots and Roxanne has been his compulsory guest of honor for many of them. Consider how much time for interaction that must have afforded them before the cameras started rolling. Even if Roxanne was only awake for an average of half an hour before each actual battle began, that would still mean that she spent roughly 300 hours alone in Megamind and Minion’s company. To put it in perspective, that’s twelve-and-a-half days! It seems nearly impossible that Roxanne could spend the equivalent of nearly two weeks in Megamind’s company without some of his charm, kindness, and humor showing through. This is quite possibly another reason for her evident attraction.

That’s not all. As mentioned in the post What Sort of Hero Will Megamind Be, the blue man lists several qualities necessary for a Defender while discussing the topic in the Metroman Museum. Although he doesn’t seem to recognize it at the time, he actually displays all of them with the exception of his former adversary's DNA. Strength? The fact that Megamind breaks a saw on Titan’s face while punching him indicates that the former villain is far more physically powerful than he looks, and his ability to remain calm and think under extreme pressure suggests that he has serious willpower. Determination? Megamind talks about learning from his many defeats, and the simple fact that he continued to get up and try again after losing more than 600 times shows that he certainly doesn’t give up easily. Courage? The alien genius goes to Roxanne for help in finding Titan’s weakness rather than fleeing despite Titan’s attempt to kill him. Afterward he puts his life on the line to save Roxanne from the new villain—and that’s after facing a superpowered foe for years. Whatever else he may be, no one can argue that Megamind isn’t brave.

Finally, there’s also Megamind’s industriousness. Imagine how many inventions he must have constructed over the years… There would doubtlessly be hundreds! Everyone one of them had to be not only built but also designed and tested. How many hours of plans, calculations, schematics, calibrations, and labor go into each one? It's unclear, but what is certain is that, despite clearly knowing how to have fun, the blue man just as obviously understands the value of hard work. It’s doubtful that laziness is a vice he has ever suffered from.

So, why is Roxanne Ritchi attracted to Megamind? While we may never know how physically desirable she finds him—although fans speculate that, based on their relationship, she must find him handsome—the blue man possesses plenty of other beguiling virtues. Alien or not, Roxanne obviously finds his intelligence and personality too alluring to ignore, and as soon as he embraced goodness rather than behaving in destructive ways she could not condone, she gave him her heart. If you consider it, that really isn’t shocking at all. If any one of us were courted by a person who was smart, funny, courageous, kind, charming, hardworking, fun-loving, and strong, would we remain unaffected? Or would we, like the movie’s heroine, tumble head-over-heels into love? In the end, it’s little wonder that Roxanne fell for the new Defender of Metro City. It would have been more surprising if she hadn’t.

That concludes this week’s Fan Theory Thursday! I hope you enjoyed it!

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ransprang · 3 years ago

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Hi! May I ask for a SFW & NSFW Jojo matchup? Any part. She/her, pan-demi, Pisces, INFJ. Aesthetic is winged liner, red lips, jeans, tees, high tops or boots, a waist flannel. Cooking, baking, gaming, writing, painting hobbies. Laid-back caretaker type, funny and sarcastic once comfortable, but get overwhelmed by social interaction & need quiet time alone. Got a temper with the right push, but calm down quick. I'm shy af with romance/sex stuff, but hella affectionate with my partner, a pleaser.

thank you for the request!!

your match up is..................

Holly Kujo

SFW

Holly is an artsy MILF with a son in jail. So to fill up her time she takes up a variety of art classes. The two of you meet at a painting class. At first you just thought of her as a friendly older woman who is very chatty.

Over a few weeks of you both painting and chatting, she invites you to her house. At her house you guys bake and cook while bopping to some music. There's also a lot inside jokes between you both. It's a pretty cute friendship!

When advancing to a romantic level, Holly will be a bit obvious with her interest. She'll ask questions like "Are you single?" then gleam with joy when you say you are. Follow up questions include "What's your type?" or "What's your favorite thing to do in bed?". Holly would savor your cute reactions and blushing.

You can also introduce her to video games, which she will become obsessed with.

Sometimes she wants to feel younger, so you can help her get more youthful clothes and teach her how to do winged eyeliner.

If you are ever feeling angry and you lash out, Holly will easily forgive you. She is super understanding and basically an angel.

N/SFW

Did we mention that Holly is a MILF? She definitely has a lot of experience under her belt. She will be super sweet and help you learn everything slowly.

She is totally fine with being a dom. She's also ok with both receiving and pleasing.

However, when you're angry with her she'll put on sexy lingerie then beat you into submission. Because she knows that's what you need.

She likes being creative in bed and will always be trying to spice things up with toys, other people and roleplay etc. (You can always say no)

She wouldn't try to hide y'alls misendeavours from Jotaro. Scream all you want baybeh let Jotaro do his homework in chaos

Your holy women,

Admins sav, san & sar

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nightswithkookmin · 3 years ago

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I’m actually really mad about this Spotify thing, not just because it turned out to be fake, but by how the fandom responded to it. Several accounts were sharing the account link and making translation posts until that playlist was added. It went from “let’s support Jk” to “this can’t be real”. It was homophobic af. Yes we should have had concerns about it’s verification but that only mattered afterwards. I’m seeing so many accounts just trying to justify it by saying “we’re not homophobic, we’re just cautious”, but that caution was no where to be found when it first was spread around. I’m really sad and upset that there was uproar because this fandom couldn’t fathom that bts might be gay.

We are just cautious....

It's the anthem for serial gaslighters, bigots and gatekeepers and they are all homophobic.

Don't know if i should cuss the person behind the account or give them a thumbs up. They gay as fuck🤣🤣🤣🤣

They just kept dialing the gay up one playlist after another😭😭🤣🤣

I loved it.

Listen, BTS IS FOR US BEDAZZLED WITH GLISTENING RAINBOW PEE ALL OVER

No matter what they do two of their members are part of the community- make that four I claim Hobi and Suga as honorary members😏

As a matter of fact I claim Tae too. FRUITY. THEY ARE ALL FRUITY BASKETS.

In all, it's the lack of sensitivity in the fandom for me. The lack of sensitivity translates as homophobia most times or even racism and anti black and bigotry.

May be one day the fandom will evolve and purge itself of the toxicity and hold itself accountable for these things.

That said if you come across a homophobic account tag me, i have some pent up residual anger from my brawl with my sister and I need an outlet for it.

Oh, going off on a tangent, don't you think Tae is a born showman?? I've been thinking about him a lot lately. He's shining but i have a feeling he shines brighter than that. I mean he's big but I feel he can become the next Biggest thing, like a millennial cultural icon or whatever if he doesn't hold back or no one holds him back. I see what Namjoon was talking about now. Interesting.

He reminds me of an elite version of Lil Nas. Not his character but his ability to use his creativity to draw attention to himself and to his advantage. Know what I mean? He's a good self marketer.

I have a feeling he would have done well on his own and we all would still know him inspite of BTS- may be not as V.

Someone mentioned dark chocolate and blueberries, actually I want it spread all over my body at the orgy. Thank you.

Seriously though this fandom needs to check the anti homosexual micro and macro aggressions else there won't be a fandom left after the war

I feel your anger.

Let baby Jesus handle these assholes with the law of Karma cos we both know we gone end up in jail if we handle it ourselves.

GOLDY

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morporkian-cryptid · 3 years ago

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Today in "Elliott's Niche AF AUs": one (1) person asked me about this, sooooo...

Lupin III Discworld AU crossover headcanon pile thingy!!!

For those who don't know: Discworld is a flat world held on the back of four giant elephants on top of a giant turtle, floating through space. That world has magic, as well as trolls, dwarves, goblins etc... but in a way that's meant to subvert typical fantasy tropes.

Ankh-Morpork, the biggest city on the Disc, is a hotbed of crime, innovations, and innovations in crime. It is run by a council of guilds, and by a Patrician (a lifelong tyrant; he's elected by the guilds but he has the final say in everything). Notorious for having an Assassins', Thieves', Beggars', and Seamstresses' (sex workers) Guilds. Also notorious for its Watch (the police), which is actually surprisingly good at solving crimes. It's also the biggest immigration destination on the Disc.

Character backstories/situations:

Lupin : half-quirmian-half-agatean (Quirm being the DW equivalent of France), grew up in the Agatean Empire (DW equivalent of China/East Asia). He moved to Ankh-Morpork to follow Fujiko, and/or to escape Zenigata. He’s an illegal thief (meaning he's not registered with the Thieves' Guild), and his favourite hobby (besides just stealing in general) is screwing with the Guild. Commander Vimes, the head of the Watch, is supposed to catch him (or at least help Zenigata catch him), but he's secretly rooting for him because he dislikes the Guild slightly more than he dislikes Lupin.

Jigen : son of a couple of Agatean immigrants in Ankh-Morpork, grew up as a street urchin in the Shades (the most crime-ridden neighborhood of the notoriously crime-ridden Ankh-Morpork). He joined the Assassins’ Guild later in his life as a (mostly self-taught) sharpshooter, with a talent that outshone that of the Guild's best students. He later quit the Guild after he met Lupin (possibly had a contract to kill Lupin, and decided “screw this I’m going with him”). He can use any kind of shooting weapons, but favors crossbows. He’s tried stealing and using the gonne (DW's first and only firearm); it didn't go well. He somehow managed to learn one single spell from the wizards, the fireball, by becoming pals with Arcchancelor Ridcully (wizard, head of the Unseen University, and famous for his unfortunate passion for crossbow shooting).

Goemon : agatean immigrant/fugitive, master swordsman. He left Agatea because Fujiko stole his Zantetsuken and fled to Ankh-Morpork, so Goemon had to follow her to retrieve his sword. He then met Lupin and Jigen and decided to stick around. The Zantetsuken is a talking sword, and its personality is basically the embodiment of Bushido. It's extremely annoying (like all talking swords), but Goemon loves it. (it was probably his only friend back in Agatea)

Fujiko : agatean immigrant/fugitive. Ran away from the Agatean Empire chased by Goemon. She joined the Thieves’ Guild, but everyone confuses her for a seamstress because her technique usually involves seduction. She tried it on Vetinari once. It failed spectacularly.

Zenigata : agatean immigrant, part of the Empire’s police force, who came to Ankh-Morpork chasing Lupin. He only brought his assistant Yata with him, and has to cooperate with the Watch to have resources to catch Lupin. Vimes doesn’t particularly like him, but he’s good at his work so he can’t say anything (they're both too stubborn to get along).

Bonus:

Yata: Zenigata’s assistant, came to Ankh-Morpork with him, rapidly became great friends with Rufus Drumknott (the Head Secretary of the Patrician, Lord Vetinari). He has a bad influence on Drumknott. He also befriended Captain Carrot Ironfoundersson, but then again Carrot befriends everyone.

Ami: She's a clacks operator. Clacks are basically the DW equivalent of telegraph. There's a group of clacks hackers called the GNU, so she might have joined them.

Albert: He's part of the Patrician's Dark Clerks (they're the secret services of Ankh-Morpork)

Rebecca: She's from Quirm. That’s all I have about her for now. (Quirm's the equivalent of France, but in the french translation it was made into an equivalent of Italy)

Random-Ass Headcanons

Lupin gets along like a house on fire with Moist von Lipwig (former conman and current postmaster, notorious adrenaline junkie), both figuratively and literally. Lupin and Lipwig sometimes team up on heists and rely on each other’s help, when they’re not busy competing against each other because Lupin keeps daring Lipwig to thieving competitions.

One of the contests�� goal is to steal Vetinari’s manuscript, The Servant. Fujiko wins. She wasn’t even in the race.

///

Fujiko quickly became friends with Adora-Belle Dearheart (Moist von Lipwig's rather explosive girlfriend), they get together every now and then to trash-talk their respective boyfriends.

///

For some reason everyone thinks Lupin is a werewolf. (it’s actually Jigen)

(maybe. I haven't yet decided whether or not he is. That would be a very good source of angst, considering what most werewolves are like, and also a very good source of domestic fluff if the whole gang has to adapt to the moon cycle and Jigen's transformations. Idk. Might be fun.)

///

Fujiko owns a horse golem (a gift from Adora-Belle or something she stole, we may never know). The Gang also owns a carriage, modified with a spell so it will drive faster, and they drive it completely carelessly. It has been destroyed and rebuilt countless times. (actually a bunch of spells, Lupin probably found a way to blackmail Ridcully so he could mod the shit out of his carriage. Or they rely on Jigen’s friendship with Ridcully)

///

Lupin uses swamp dragons as firearms (dialogue courtesy of @marquise-de-clarabas: Jigen: You stole a dragon??? Lupin: I didn’t steal him! He’s his own person and can make decisions himself! Dragon: I wanna steal). He has an alias and disguise entirely dedicated to visiting the Sunshine Sanctuary For Sick Dragons, and somehow became friends with Lady Sybil Ramkin-Vimes (Commander Vimes' wife, and the greatest expert on swamp dragons in the city, probably on the Disc). Vimes doesn't know about it, and Lupin finds the whole situation hilarious. He constantly makes jokes about how he’s playing with fire.

///

The Thieves’ Guild and the Watch are competing to catch the Gang, but secretly Vimes is rooting for the Gang (the Guild just hates them). That said, Vimes also hates Lupin (only slightly less than he dislikes the Guild), because he's always a little shit whenever he gets put in jail, and then he immediately breaks out.

///

Rincewind (famously bad wizard with a shit luck and a tendency to run from problems) once got arrested by Zenigata, because he got startled by him yelling LUPAAAAAAAAAN! and started running for the hills, making Zenigata believe he was Lupin in disguise. Rincewind is terrified of Zenigata.

///

Zenigata is actively trying to stop the Thieves' Guild from catching Lupin and Co, both because he wants to catch them himself, and because he knows what the Guild does to illegal thieves and he doesn’t want it to happen to Lupin.

///

Lupin stole Ridcully’s hat (custom wizard hat with a bunch of pockets, drawers, a crossbow, and a tiny flask of alcohol) as a gift for Jigen’s birthday. He also stole Lipwig’s hat (golden cap with dove wings), after which Adora claimed she didn’t recognize Moist (dialogue courtesy of @marquise-de-clarabas: Moist: C’mon babe, it’s me, your boyfriend! Adora, knowing full well who he is: I have never met this man in my entire life). He also raided the Assassins' Guild's armory/museum to get a birthday gift for Goemon.

///

About Jigen and the gonne (spoilers for Men at Arms) : basically, the gonne being such a dangerous and destructive weapon compared to crossbows, it has a nigh-magical attraction on people, and awakens and strengthens whatever lust for power, vengeance, blood etc they have. It basically controls its user and feeds on their convictions, addictions, wants, etc. The only person known to have resisted it is Vimes (because he's a stubborn mofo with a sense of morals you could bend iron on), and even he came damn near to losing his mind. (And Carrot, because... he's Carrot.)

Assuming the gonne didn't get destroyed in this AU: after they steal it, Lupin tries to use it, gets completely possessed/cursed (again) and accidentally tries to murder his friends (again), prompting Jigen to take it from him. Jigen then gets possessed as well, and they start fighting for the gonne, until Goemon just walks in, takes it out of their hands and takes it away. Goemon's completely unaffected by the gonne because 1) of his ascetic training and 2) "it is a filthy morporkian artifact and cannot compare to the noble art of the sword."

///

Zenigata often teams up with Angua (resident werewolf of the Watch), they get along very well. The Gang is very easy to track, they smell like a tobacco factory that has caught on fire.

///

Yata and Drumknott (Patrician's head secretary, and confidante, sort of) get together after office hours, and argue about whose boss is the best (because as we all know they both have a crush on respective bosses). One day Drumknott accidentally calls Vetinari “Sempai” after he heard Yata call Zenigata that all the time.

///

Lupin follows Lipwig’s example and steals all of Yata’s pencils every time he visits the Pseudopolis Yard (the Watch's HQ). Drumknott is fuming when Yata tells him about it.

///

Leonardo Da Quirm is butt-naked, because Part 4.

///

Something with vampires, probably.

///

tagging @carriagelamp and @mad-whoman-with-a-book00 because I know you may be potentially interested in this AU ^^

#lupin iii #lupin the third #discworld #ankh-morpork #terry pratchett #lupin iii discworld au #already making a tag in case i make more posts; you never know #the hobbit's headcanons

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thepinkseat-askthemoonbunny · 4 years ago

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Welp...I did it. I made yet ANOTHER Silm OC, and I'm not sorry about it (the silver hair/brown skin combo is my aesthetic, don't judge me).

Anyway, this is Aranmír Edlothion, also known as the Prince of Flowers in his wedding attire. I came up with the idea of him from doing a fantasy RP with a friend of mine, and my absolute obsession with enemies to lovers so...here he is! My lovely boi, I hope y'all love him as much as I do! Facts under the cut.

Name Translation:

Father-name: Aranmír- "king's jewel" (I know in Quenya it'd be spelt with a double m but I dunno if that's how Sindarin works)

Mother-name: Edlothion- "blossomer, bloomer, he who causes flowering"

He's the third and youngest child of Thingol and Melian after Luthien and Daeron (cuz I see a lot of people making Dae Luthi's brother in their headcanons and I figured "why the fuck not get in on the headcanon fun? I mean Tinfang would've been her brother too in another version")

He's a botanist and horticulturist who has a stronger relationship with plants than people. He's cultivated several varieties of flower and fruit, hence his nickname. Practically lives in his greenhouse.

Can make a shit ton of drugs, poisons, and alcohols from his plants, my guy is a walking pharmacy.

Looks sweet and nice and poised, is actually batshit feral and will fuck you up.

Horny on main but also a nerd

Will go days without sleep getting caught up in his research.

Loves his family to death and they're all really close-knit, but inferiority complex like a MOTHERFUCKER. Being in this family will do that to you, I mean he’s like an actually cheerful Caranthir.

With Thingol being the greatest of the Sindar and Melian being a literal angel, Luthien being literally the hottest thing to walk the earth (also stupidly magically powerful) and Daeron being the best singer of all time, Ara is just the “weird plant kid”.

His Maiarin magic takes the form of being able to manipulate and magically affect plant growth.

Married Celegorm to forge an alliance for peace. Basically Morgoth is a bigger threat than he is in canon and in order to defeat him, the Sindar and the Noldor have to kiss and make up...literally. Both groups would rather die than join forces but they really have no choice because the Valar are sitting on their glittery asses not helping (at least not yet)

Agreed to the match out of duty to Doriath (and also to say "hey, I'm useful guys. Be proud of me"), Thingol is pissed. "HELL NO, I'D RATHER FACE MORGOTH BY MYSELF THAN GIVE MY CHILD TO THOSE WILD DOGS!"

Luthien is ALSO pissed, especially considering what Celegorm and Curufin tried to pull with her. She is NOT happy about letting her little bro "be sold to a pit of vipers"

On their wedding day there was crying. A LOT of crying. But Ara would die for his people so he sucks it up, and also to protect his brother and sister from being selected.

Those flowers braided into Ara's hair are red anemones, symbolizing protection against evil (he's gonna need it)

To say that he and Tyelko do NOT fuck with each other would be the understatement of the century.

Tried to poison his "beloved husband" once, having a huge knowledge of plants he knows which ones are poisonous af. He was basically in cushy jail (watched like a hawk and confined to his rooms) for like the next two years after that.

Unfortunately for him, Celegorm also knows his plant stuff cuz...hunter, hello. So yeah, that didn't work. He thought it was cute, but told Ara in no uncertain terms that if he tried that shit again, he'd make his life hell.

Turning point came when they were stuck in a survival situation and forced to work together to literally not die.

It's cliche AF but they bonded a little over nature and shit..

Another cliche: It was raining, they were cold and hubby is attractive...so yeah.

Their interactions consisted of VERY sporadic friendly moments interspersed with veiled insults and hate sex. (Ara threw up their first time, feeling like a traitor to his dead kin)

Before they realized "we're stuck with each other forever, may as well try not to be miserable for the rest of eternity"

So they tried to get along and shit and discovered they had a lot of similar interests.

Curufin kinda gets jealous of their friendship because Tyelko's his fave brother (and also Ara tried to poison him)

It literally took them like 300 years to move from enemies to semi-friends.

Ara saved his husband’s life once by brewing up an antidote for a poisoned arrow wound (he didn’t poison him this time)

Celegorm comforted Ara over his grief at Luthien's death (he blamed him at first, of course) and this led to them becoming even closer.

They like to hang out together in the woods, sometimes not coming back for days.

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tfw-no-tennis · 4 years ago

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mtmte liveblog issue 30

30 issues wow...forget the fact that I skipped like 5 issues of crossover event nonsense

another big ole swerve recap omg

this trial is so messsyyyyyyyyy lmao

hvbajdfbahsjkfdbhjs starscream listening to meagtrons speech looking like ‘hmmmmmmm I may have miscalculated’

prowl looks pissed af meanwhile optimus just looks dead inside lmao

I mean. megatron kinda does have a point. this is like, the most biased, conflict of interests lookin trial of all time, in that all the major participants have some sort of long, complicated history with each other. what a mess

optimus, listening to megatron’s speech: wow this is worse than divorce court was

oh shit I totally forgot that those decepticons attacked the trial

MAGNUS HAMMER AYYYYYY

a guy saying ‘objection!’ as optimus prime punches half his face off...that pretty much sums up idw op lmao

op: oh thank god, I can punch shit now. I'm not cut out for this bureaucracy nonsense

megatron: thanks, random decepticon, for the attempted rescue, but I'm super old and I just want to nap so no thanks

random decepticon: wtf- [gets murdered by optimus prime]

I love op’s big ass antennae

meanwhile, brainstorm goes to a bar and instead of buying anything, pulls out his own drink. I feel like that isn't allowed in most bars, or is at least frowned up vbsjdhfbhjdkfn. ily brainstorm

also? big ass mood I was so broke last time I was on a barhopping vacation w/friends that I brought a cheap giantass bottle of mixed drink in my backpack and just drank that at all the bars lmao

WHIRLLLL I love his humansona sm. and also I love that whirl is into artsy french movies or w/e omg

brainstorm, drinking thru a wrist funnel: sorry I cant take my mask off rn it isn’t plot relevant yet

‘earthlets’ lmao

I love that rung is like, too pretentious to care that much about movies and would rather read earth books lol

and then bluestreak is like ‘yeah they have books...comic books’ can this man not read

I still cannot fuckign believe that the argument that got megatron out of a for-sure death sentence or w/e was ‘its not a war crime if we’re on the moon’ liiiiike what the actual hell lmao

also I love that, once again, we see magnus’s strict adherence to the law, technicalities and all

magnus: you cant really stop a trial and move it somewhere else where the laws are better suited to the outcome you desire

prowl: what are you, a cop? fuck off

also op being like ‘ok whatever all that doesn't matter...what DOES matter is that it would look bad for us to move the trial to cybertron in an obvious attempt to circumvent the rules, and public perception is what’s most important, fuck all that ‘morality’ bullshit’

meanwhile, rodimus is dead! and ambulon is also dead, which makes first aid sad, which makes ME sad

ayyy, rodimus is still alive! well, one rodimus is alive, at least

rodimus and megatron really have the vibes of ‘stepfather and stepson forced to work together on a family road trip gone wrong after dad decided to sit this one out’ lmao

ah yes, ‘malaise’ the medical diagnostic term for ‘I don't feel so hot and idk why’ that practitioners like to throw under the ‘diagnostic notes’ section of lab orders to explain why they're ordering every blood test under the sun for a patient

I love medical terminology. ANYWAYS

BE NICE TO MY BOY MEGATRON.

rodimus: listen I have to come to terms with the fact that there's another version of me right here, and he’s DEAD, which means we can’t fuck, which is super lame

I firmly believe that rodimus would be team ‘hell yeah id have sex with my AU self’ tbh

I find it interesting that megatron is often casting blame for his actions onto others - here, he says that rodimus made him realize he doesn’t want to stop doing stuff w/his life, and then says that starscream forced his hand w/the whole ‘luna 2 law’ thing, and previously he’s said how whirl beating him up in jail is what led to him abandoning pacifism - take responsibility for your actions and decisions dude!

though he goes on to say here that he resorted to violence because he realized that the system that was in place could withstand everything else he would have tried to use to change it, which is super interesting

megatron: okay, yes, I MIGHT have murdered billions, but I could help find us a new planet, which would be baller, sooooo...how about you co-opt your lame son’s frat boy ship and put me in charge?

op: sounds fair to me. now how about we do some more Big Speeches before I make you somebody else’s problem

vbhdjskfbhaskdjf the ‘team rodimus’ lineup setup reminds me so much of the ‘together we make the ______’ meme with the different members being like, ‘the power’ ‘the gay’ ‘the awesome’ ‘the guy with no ears’ hbvhjdkfbs

chromedome: if I do this I could die

rodimus: that sounds like a you problem bro

‘this one time’ YEA RIGHT c'mon cd honor your dead husband’s wishes

omfg I forgot abt brainstorms ‘early early warning system’ lmao

I love nautica soooo much oh man

ooooof drift :( :( oh no

dead future rodimus!! uh oh is right

rodimus, known himbo: I'm sure I can defeat the inevitability of future events! all I have to do is cut my own arm off!

tailgateeeee he’s so cute...I love that he can tell stories of his daring escapades, just like at the beginning of mtmte, but this time its actually TRUE

OH SHITTTT GETAWAY

he looks so fucking sinister there lmao how are we NOT supposed to realize he has bad intentions from the get-go

‘you’ll make a prime one day’ well, getaway, you’re right about that at least...

cyclonus in the bg like 🤨🤔 at getaway

seriously I cant get over how getaway has such a slimy kinda vibe to him, like specifically in his interactions w/tailgate - this is before things even really take off but I'm still like TG GET AWAY (lol) FROM THIS GUY

cyclonus: somebody flirting with my crush? better go stare out a window instead of communicating absolutely anything to said crush about my feelings!

honestly I feel like, while megatron renouncing the decepticons and becoming an autobot is certainly interesting, it would be equally interesting for him to remain a decepticon but try to change the philosophy of the movement

like, I get why op had him give that speech - to prevent the cons from trying to free megs again/thinking that he was being coerced into things (ironic considered he WAS coerced into giving that speech) - but it’s kinda the easy way our for megatron - being able to completely abandon the decepticon cause and not deal with it at all, and start over anew as an autobot

it would've been a lot harder to remain a con and try to reform what he has broken in the decepticon movement - but I think that would've been really interesting

though from a writing logistics standpoint, I get why jro didn't go for that bc we don't get a lot of other decepticons in the cast for that to work, and also megatron still definitely DOES have to face down all his mistakes w/the decepticons w/the djd and overlord and whatnot

anyways. I cant believe that all megatron had to do to join the lost light was make ONE speech denouncing the decepticons. like, they should've at least had him do a tiktok dance too or something, just to make it a really tough deal

I love the rodpod vbhjfsdkfbjaskjndfj

ok but I still don't really get the logic of making megs CAPTAIN like ouch. poor rodimus

I feel like making megs a bartender at swerves or st would've been WAY more useful in showing him humility or w/e. OR it would've made him evil again, which, fair,

ratchet: don't worry, we’ll medically poison him, it’ll be fine

ok but rodimus is right, this is SO messy, op wants to prove his ex husband isn't 100% evil so he’s like ‘ill let my rebellious son deal with him’ lmao god. I love this setup so much, its so wild

ratchet is also right, rodimus’s fuckup definitely pales in comparison to megatrons All That

OH BRUTALLLLLLLL when ratchet says the list is fake ‘because my name’s not on it’ FUCKING OUCHHHHH

‘only bad guys say ‘unhand me” rodimus ily

omfg ‘we’ve practiced this’ of course they've done evacuation drills...magnus ily

lmao it’s the panel where it looks like rodimus and megatron are doing karaoke or having some sort of rap battle

and the lost light is GONE! oh shit!!!!

and there closes issue 30! once again we’ve gotten a lot of setup and exposition - which, while definitely necessary, means I don't have too much to say

I will say, throwing megatron onto the lost light has definitely mixed things up, and it’s interesting to see new dynamics already forming

so, until next time!

#lj rereads mtmte

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vince-thrilligan · 5 years ago

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Rhea Seehorn: Who is Kim Wexler?

“I saw that something was eroding in Kim for multiple seasons.”

Awards Focus: In the season four finale, Kim was stunned when Jimmy revealed his emotional speech to get his law license reinstated was just a performance. She’s left standing in the hall as he races off to change his name to Saul Goodman.

This year, it’s Kim’s turn to leave Jimmy on his heels. Were you shocked when she left her work on Mesa Verde and subsequently started brainstorming about decimating Howard’s career to get Jimmy his Sandpiper case money?

Rhea Seehorn: Well, to be fair, it is a series of decisions. I saw that something was eroding in Kim for multiple seasons. And what I appreciate about our series, like Vince (Gilligan) and Peter (Gould) did with Breaking Bad, it’s about incremental decisions that these people are making. They’re unaware that they’re falling off a complete cliff. I didn’t know what that final scene was going to be. But I took every step that was handed to me with the information she had presently and played that scene.

AF: You’ve said you’ve seen erosion going on in Kim, can you speak more to that?

Seehorn: The beauty of the show is that these characters are so affected by their past, not only by the events we’ve seen on the series but even before that. From the beginning of the series there was something about Kim’s stillness and her need for control and to right every ship. When I looked at that, I asked “What are you trying to get away from?” or “What are you suppressing that’s so chaotic that you need to make sure that everything is steady all the time?” Those questions spoke to me about the changes we’re seeing in the latter half of this season.

AF: So there’s a potential “Slippin’ Kimmy” underneath the Kim we’ve come to know?

Seehorn: About halfway through the season, Peter (Gould) said that he and the writers started thinking about the masks we all wear and what’s behind Kim’s mask. I will be very interested to see if she follows through with the decimation of Howard Hamlin and can she stomach those actions? Is she a person now who doesn’t even have a conscience? When she shoots the finger guns at Jimmy, there’s a menacing undertone that certainly concerns him.

AF: There’s so many telling moments about Kim’s character. The moment when she and Jimmy are throwing the beer bottles off the roof, but Kim cleans up the glass the next morning. If Kim does goes through with this plan for Howard, do you think she would follow suit in some sort of attempt to clean up that mess as well?

Seehorn: That’s a good question. If Kim goes through with her plan, there may no way for Howard to recover. Michael Morris directed those beer bottle scenes, I love how they tie the episodes together. The first one where Kim had some animosity about her saying the name Saul Goodman and then when they’re tossing the bottles together it’s a bonding moment.

AF: Bob (Odenkirk) has spoken about living with Patrick (Fabian) and yourself in Albuquerque. Can you give our audience a look into the behind the scenes life during production?

Seehorn: The three of us have been living together for the last two years and prior to that Bob and Patrick lived together for a season without me. Frankly, I wish we’d been doing it the whole time. It’s so helpful because the scripts are so dense and complex and you’re always wishing you had more time to play with them and find new things.

AF: As you’ve pointed out, the scripts are often dense. When you have a dialogue heavy episode, how much of that preparation is just getting a grasp on the material?

Seehorn: A lot of it. Jonathan Banks and I laugh because we have the same philosophy. If you think you’re off book, then you need to ask yourself, “Are you off book riding a bike? Are you off book standing on your head? Are you off book swimming in the ocean?”

You think you know your lines and then as soon as you’re asked to do something, or you try blocking, or your scene partner decides to do whatever they’re going to do, the words start to slip away from you. There’s just no time for that with our shooting schedule, not if you want to bring your A-game.

AF: Is there a general time set aside for working through the scripts at the house?

Seehorn: If you’re having a cup of coffee in the main kitchen, you’re gonna get asked to read lines. You basically need to hide in your room if you don’t want to run lines, because if you are seen or visible anywhere in the house, you’re going to get asked. And we run lines that are not our scenes too. Like if Howard has a scene with someone else, then I’ll be whoever he’s talking to and it’s great.

AF: The scenes between Lalo (Tony Dalton) and Kim are incredible this season. Before we dive into specifics, talk about working with Tony and his presence as Lalo.

Seehorn: I mean, how great is Tony? What a find that Sherry Thomas and Sharon Bialy brought to Vince and Peter. He’s so talented, but he’s also a very generous actor. It doesn’t matter if he’s not talking for the majority of the episode nine confrontation, he’s giving me so much in that scene once I’m toe-to-toe with him.

AF: We saw a different Kim when she meets Lalo in jail. Can you talk about crafting that confrontation?

Seehorn: I spoke with Gordon Smith, who wrote episode eight, about the idea of when is Kim off her game? Because previously, we’d seen that she can fall apart in a stairwell or at home, but once she walks into a courtroom or a meeting, she suppresses all of that, and can be totally professional.

So, I went in there questioning “Do we think she can actually hold herself together right now?” We decided that she probably hasn’t slept at all and she knows this is a very scary situation. She’s pretty sure that Jimmy is dead or dying in the desert right now and she can’t call the police and tell them what happened. So, she’s trying to get information from Lalo and she’s unsuccessful in that scene whereas in episode nine she is successful.

I like that Kim got two attempts to go at Lalo using intelligence and rhetoric. The second one in episode nine, written and directed by Tom Schnauz, was a monster of a scene and we knew it.

AF: What were some of the logistical considerations for the episode nine faceoff?

Seehorn: Tom came to Bob and Tony and I, and asked if we could rehearse it on set. It’s technically a difficult scene, I have the big monologue at the end, but Tony has to play a lot of different things as he’s reacting to what he’s hearing from Bob and then Kim.

For Bob, he has to repeat the same story but slightly differently, I think four times, which for an actor is very hard material to memorize because you lose track of where you are in the loop. Tom had written in purposeful nuances as Jimmy sort of devolves in his storytelling.

So we rehearsed it, and thankfully we made a lot of decisions with Marshall Adams (the director of photography) and our camera ops and lighting people. That allowed us to get ahead of the curve and give ourselves the hours that we had to shoot it instead of losing time on the technical aspects.

AF: At the beginning of that scene, you have to be very present for Bob and Tony, conveying that sense of dread and uncertainty that Kim feels. What’s going through her head there?

Seehorn: Kim is in survival mode for the first half of the scene. She’s very still, but she’s practical. I think she’s immediately thinking, “Could we jump from this balcony? Where are the knives in the house? Could Jimmy and I take him if we had to?” Eventually, she’s run out of options and is left with observing Jimmy and what unfolds in front of her.

AF: Kim knows that Jimmy is lying to Lalo and that Lalo either suspects it or knows it.

Seehorn: She knows there’s a secret involving the bullet hole in the mug, and that the secret is so great that Jimmy is literally crumbling in front of her and it needs to be protected at all cost for some reason.

AF: And then Kim steps up to the plate, which was the most harrowing moment of the season. Were you always meant to get so close to Tony, having Kim invade Lalo’s space like that?

Seehorn: Yeah, that was in the script. I spoke to Jennifer Bryan, who’s brilliant with our costumes, and I said, “Kim’s coming from work so she has her heels on… do you think we can get the shoes off in the scene?” I talked to Tom Schnauz about having Kim’s shoes off because I wanted to be even physically smaller than Lalo.

Kim switches to pragmatism in that moment, that’s her fight or flight. She wants to go toe-to-toe like she’s proving a case, finding the holes in Lalo’s story and sewing enough doubt that he backs down.

AF: Do you think Kim prepared her argument while she was sitting there, listening to Jimmy?

Seehorn: I talked to Tom about that, I don’t think she memorized this monologue while she was sitting there on the couch worried. I think she starts it and has to find it. So, we made sure we did a couple of runs at that, just letting me find it and letting me constantly control that lump in my throat because Kim can’t become hysterical.

If Lalo sees that she’s emotionally terrified or starts screaming or anything like, she loses all she has, which is trying to present a logical, forceful argument that he really has to consider. You see Lalo shush Kim earlier on the scene, so I think she’s pretty clear what the cartel would think of women screaming or crying.

AF: Prior to Lalo, Kim’s biggest confrontation was with Mesa Verde client Kevin Wachtell (Rex Linn). The property tycoon was locking horns with Mr. Acker (Barry Corbin), an elderly home owner who refused to vacate his property.

Kim, feeling sympathetic to the man’s circumstances, recruits Jimmy to represent him — a move that nearly causes their relationship to implode. I don’t think anyone saw the idea for marriage coming, much less from Kim. What was your reaction to that?

Seehorn: That was something Bob and I worked extensively on, getting that moment to feel authentic. It’s also Kim accepting Jimmy for who he is, rough edges and all. In episode nine, Jimmy can’t accept Kim’s decision to quit Mesa Verde and she calls him out on it.

AF: Knowing what we know from Breaking Bad and now El Camino, there are very few living characters in the Gene timeline that could give fans a meaningful, full-circle conversation as the series closes. Would you agree with the argument that Kim is the obvious choice for the final conversation with the Gene?

Seehorn: Honestly, I didn’t know I’d be alive this long. If I attempt to take myself out of the equation, which is super hard as an actor, I think the writers are always going to reach for the smartest ending.

Is it the most satisfying storytelling with Kim there at the end? Or is it not? I do agree with you that as a fan I want some resolution regarding Gene. Will we only get one more scene at the beginning of season six, or will it be expanded throughout that season? There’s another question for you.

Part of AwardsFocus.com’s BCS interviews [x]

#rhea seehorn #bcs season 5 #kim wexler #awardsfocus #i swear if she's not nominated this time...

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teenybeanielinguine · 6 years ago

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Outlander Season 5 - A Girl Can Dream

It’s been a little over two weeks since the Season 4 finale... and DAMN, the withdrawal is hitting me hard. I’ve rewatched all my favorite scenes, re-read all my favorite passages, and scoured Tumblr for every piece of fanfiction available. But nothing seems capable of filling the Outlander-shaped void in my heart.

Since I clearly have nothing better to do (not true; there are A LOT of other things I should be doing), I’ve decided to grace you all with my unsolicited thoughts (no need to thank me). Season 5 has no announced release date, but I’m not known for my patience, so I’m hopping on the crazy train a little early. Destination: The Fiery Cross. (Spoilers ahead.)

About The Fiery Cross

I’ve read quite a few posts that label Drums of Autumn as the pivotal point in the series. I respectfully disagree.

DoA felt like the next step in a gradual evolution. It’s true that Bree and Roger gained their independence from the J/C plotline in DoA, but DG had been prepping us for this divergence for quite a while. Claire was our only narrator in Outlander, and while she remains the only 1st person POV, other characters have been quietly adding their voices to hers. Roger joined her in Dragonfly in Amber, followed by Jamie and John Grey in Voyager, and we finally get Brianna in Drums of Autumn (that’s RIGHT: in the main books, we hear Roger’s POV before we ever hear Jamie’s). Because of these constantly expanding POVs, DoA just felt like a natural progression, rather than a huge departure from the status quo.

The Fiery Cross, on the other hand, feels like a turning point. Not only is it the first book to not get a newly added POV, but the story starts to get a little... unpredictable.

All of the books have a fair amount of twistiness and unpredictability, but our characters have pretty clear goals in each installation so far: get back to the stones, save Jamie from Black Jack, prevent the Rising, prevent Culloden, make Brianna believe the truth, find Jamie after 20 years, rescue Young Ian, establish the Ridge, warn Jamie and Claire about the fire, rescue Roger... I know I’m generalizing here, but you get the point. Our heroes all have clearly defined end goals, and they’re putting all their energy into achieving them, despite the twists and turns that DG throws their way. The characters may not always succeed, but you, the reader, always know where the story is headed.

By the start of The Fiery Cross, the goals are a little broader, more nebulous. There may be unrest in North Carolina, the American Revolution may be looming in the distance, but basically the Fraser family just wants to live in peace on the Ridge. That’s it. No daring rescues, no dramatic reunions; they just want some peace and quiet. Of course, they aren’t going to get it, because this is Outlander-verse, where Murphy’s Law is on steroids.

So the Frasers play it by ear, taking on every new challenge as it comes. There is no clear path forward, they just have to react as best they can to the events around them. In consequence, the reader gets a series of smaller meandering stories, with the distinct feeling that something bigger is happening in the background. I personally love this, because I have no clue what’s going to happen next, so when something big happens, it takes me completely by surprise. And you get to see the characters just exist in day-to-day life, which is the best. Some of the characters still have personal goals (spoiler alert: Stephen Bonnet definitely did NOT die in that explosion), but the pursuit of those goals isn’t driving the story nearly as much as in past installments.

This is all to say that, while Season 5 is going to have to hit some major plot points, there is (in my opinion) a fair amount of breathing room for interpretation, and lots of fun to be had. I’m fascinated to see the show tackle this new challenge.

My Wish List for Season 5

When I say “wish list”, I don’t mean to imply a series of demands. I have no creative control over the adaptation, and I’m not listing these wishes in the vain hope that someone on the production team will notice. This is just for fun, and I will be perfectly content if none of these make it into the show. Also, not all of these are pulled from the book; some of them are just things I would love to see.

So here are my top ten wishes, in no particular order:

Roger the Fangirl. In the midst of all the Roger-hate this past season, the OL fandom has forgotten one crucial fact: Roger is the ultimate J/C shipper. This romantic idiot is the whole reason that Claire went back in time to find Jamie! You’d think Jamie’s fists would have beaten the ship right out of Roger, but if last season proves anything, it’s that Roger doesn’t give up easily. He’s gonna keep shipping like his life depends on it, and there are some really cute moments in TFC where he fangirls over how adorable Jamie and Claire are together (also, Jamie is going to become his new idol). I suppose it would be unrealistic to hope that he and Murtagh form a fan club next season...?

Brothers and Sisters. Am I the only one who wanted to scream when Brianna and Fergus were right next to each other in the Wilmington jail and they didn’t acknowledge each other? By the end of S4, we don’t even know whether Fergus and Marsali know about Bree’s existence (I mean, Fergus helped capture Bonnet, but he and Marsali didn’t say a word about Bree), and that frustrates me to no end. The books skipped over the getting-to-know-you stuff too, which is crazy considering that they are siblings (adopted or not)! I would kill for a scene where Jamie and Claire are struggling to explain why they have a fully-grown daughter, as well as some bonding time between siblings. Bree and Marsali are definitely going to get along, cause badass women stick together.

The Snake Bite. The snake bite incident (aftermath included) is one of my favorite sequences in TFC. It brings Roger and Jamie closer together, it shows the courage of the Fraser women in a crisis, and it rallies the entire Ridge community in their worry for Jamie. I suppose it’s sadistic of me, but I loved watching everyone freak out when they thought Jamie was going to die or lose a leg. And then the 20th century women come to the rescue! An entire episode dedicated to that whole plotline would be amazing.

Grannie and Grand-da. Claire and Jamie are not only adorable as grandparents, they’re relatable AF. They might love their new grandson to pieces, but that’s not going to stop them from being honest about the realities of childcare. Jamie in particular is hilarious; he builds an entire house at top speed to get away from the screeching baby (and his newly reunited parents), and then he compares Bree unflatteringly to the white sow (not to her face, of course; see Chapter 30 for a good laugh). I’d love to see that side of Jamie and Claire next season.

Wolf’s Brother. We might have said a tearful goodbye to Young Ian in the S4 finale, but we haven’t seen the last of him. My guess is that he’s going to make a dramatic reappearance in the S5 finale, but I really hope we see him before then. Showing Young Ian’s time among the Mohawk would give Outlander a chance to showcase the amazing First Nations actors that appeared in S4 (Braeden Clarke, anyone?) as well as explore how Ian slowly blends his Highland upbringing with Mohawk customs.

Claire the Science Nerd. So far all of Claire’s medical expertise has been utilized in life-or-death situations, but establishing a medical practice on the Ridge gives her the opportunity to geek out over plants and experiment in reproducing 20th century medicine in the 18th century. Over the course of TFC, she gives genetics lessons, performs two tonsillectomies, and produces penicillin (among other things). This passion for her craft is one of the reasons I love Claire so much. And her nerd moments aren’t always serious: one of my favorite scenes in the book features Claire and her microscope giving Jamie a hilarious lesson in reproductive biology.

Fraser’s Ridge. We didn’t get to see much of the Ridge community in S4, although Jamie did allude to the farmers who contributed the grain to make whisky. The community is comprised of a growing array of Scottish immigrants, and the drama they bring to Claire and Jamie’s lives wavers between amusing and disastrous. I don’t think the show will have time to explore the entire cast of characters, but I’m hoping to see Thomas Christie and his children introduced, at least. I’ve always found Tom Christie a strangely compelling character; his children, on the other hand, are nothing more than a necessary evil. I also really hope we meet the twins, Josiah and Keziah Beardsley (Lizzie’s story is about to get really interesting).

The MacKenzie Bloodline. Despite all the time-traveling she’s been doing, Claire has yet to meet any of her ancestors (that we know of... DG might be holding out on us). Roger, on the other hand, is not going to be so lucky (if you’ve read all eight books, you’ll know that Roger runs into his ancestors A LOT). By the end of S4, I’m not sure Jamie is aware that his daughter is married to Geillis Duncan and Dougal MacKenzie’s descendant, but I wanna be there when he and Murtagh find out (a perfect opportunity for some good dialogue and tension). And while Roger may be able to explain his ancestry to Jamie and Murtagh (both of whom are fully aware of the existence of time travel), he’s not going to be able to give the same explanation to Jocasta. In the beginning of TFC, there’s a really great conversation between Jocasta and Roger where Jocasta is kinda fishing around for clues about Roger’s family. Roger, of course, can’t tell her that he’s actually her great-great-grandnephew (give or take a few ‘great’s). My hope is that the show includes some version of this conversation and continues to play around with Roger’s MacKenzie heritage (and all its implications).

Future Talk. With three time-travelers in the family, there’s bound to be some discussion of the future. Especially with the tension mounting in North Carolina and Murtagh aligning himself with the Regulators. I am yearning for some deep discussion between Jamie, Murtagh, and the travelers about the events to come. I have a hunch that either Claire or Bree has already informed Murtagh about the American Revolution, based on a comment he made to Jocasta about a “different ending”, but I want to see it actually played out on screen. The interplay between the characters who know the future and those who don’t is fascinating to me, and I want more of it.

Jamie the Protector. Jamie’s protective instincts have had some disastrous consequences this past season, but he is going to redeem himself next season. Early on in TFC, Jamie claims Roger as the “son of his house”, and he proceeds to stand by that claim throughout the book, especially in the aftermath of Roger’s wrongful hanging at the hands of Governor Tryon. This time, Jamie’s protective feelings aren’t going to result in a beating, though it’s a close call. I love this shift, from Jamie beating Roger to Jamie protecting/avenging Roger; it’s a very satisfying development.

Bonus: Geese. Brianna and Roger may have a child together, but they have never lived together as a married couple. They also don’t have very much experience being in a serious relationship (S4 showed us that they really don’t know how to argue properly). However, they have both grown up quite a bit since their hand fasting, and you get to see them learning how to coexist in Chapter 33 of TFC. It’s a great scene, where Roger’s just come back with the militia, and he and Bree have a meaningless fight because she hasn’t had it easy since the militia left. But they resolve their argument peacefully as Bree vents her frustrations to Roger and gives him a drawing of some geese as a Christmas present. A really wonderful everyday moment.

There are, of course, more things I’d like to see, but these are my favorites. I thought I’d list them out now, since this is going to be a LONG Droughtlander, and I am sure to get obsessed with something else eventually (the new A Discovery of Witches show looks promising). Also, I’m going to temporarily forget about Season 5 if Bees comes out first.

What are your wishes for Season 5? If you choose to respond, please be kind and respectful.

#a few wishes #so bored #outlander #outlander season 5 #the fiery cross

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rasackyousof · 5 years ago

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KACAAN | There was no choice.

Half a century ago, on 21st October, 1969, following the death of former Somali president, the Somali National Army took over power filling a political and institutional vacuum brought about by internal turmoil, incompetence and a corrupt government.

The October revolution was the beginning of a new era, which many consider the golden age of the modern Somali nation, the end of which was, nevertheless, disastrous.

The Mastermind

The October revolution (better known as The KACAAN) was engineered and led by Major General Mohamed Siad Barre.

Barre was born in Shiilaabo, in what is now the Somali State of Ethopia, in about 1910. S. Barre travelled to Lugh and Mogadishu in the then Somalia Italiana for what formal schooling he had and later joined the Corpo Zaptie, Polizia Africana Italiana.

After British Commonwealth forces overran the Italian colony early in 1941, S. Barre went on a course run by the King's African Rifles at Kabetti, in Kenya, and thereafter was employed in the special branch of the British Colonial Police, which took control of the Corpo Zaptie. This experience was his introduction to political intrigue, at which he proved adept. He rose to the highest rank then possible for an indigenous Somali.

In 1949, when Italy was granted United Nations Trusteeship over Somalia to prepare for independence after 10 years, S. Barre was awarded a two-year scholarship to the Carabinieri Police College in Italy, and thereafter he attended courses in politics and administration in Mogadishu. He was the first Somali to be commissioned as a full police officer.

When Somalia's own police force was formed, S. Barre had won accelerated promotion to the rank of Brigadier-General of Police. Barre opted for the Somali National Army on its formation in April 1960. He was one of its deputy commanders and was promoted to succeed the Commander-in-Chief when the latter died in 1965.

The Revolution

On 15 October 1969, Somalia's second president, H.E. Abdirashid Ali Sharmake, was assassinated in the town of Las-Anod in northern Somalia by a policeman whilst touring a drought-stricken area.

In a stark breach of the constitution of the newly founded State, several members of the parliament recommended that a candidate belonging to the same sub-clan as the assassinated president should inherit the post. It was agreed that Haji Muse Boqor, a Mogadishu businessman and close relative of the late president, be elected. As a result of the rampant corruption and vote-buying culture prevalent at the time, a bidding war was initiated where corrupt candidates were bidding on the price of the presidency. Not surprisingly, Haji Muse Bogor was leading the group (with a payment approximated at £4,000, according to some). A deal was struck and the parliament was set to vote for the fixed candidate in exchange for promised bribe, promising a continuation of the status quo.

The days following the assassination of the president were a clear demonstration of incompetence and a total chaos, diminishing the support and the trust the public had in the venal government. The ineptitude and endemic corruption practices not only aggravated the majority of the Somali population but the armed forces as well. It became clear that the nation was in a dire need of salvation.

In the early morning of 21 October 1969, the date which was set for the parliament to convene and present the presidency to the agreed candidate, Haji Muse Boqor, Somalia’s military intervened and seized all the strategic points in the capital and the main streets, immediately arresting all the members of parliament, several politicians linked to tribal chiefs or foreign interests and the lobbyists.

On 24 October, in a broadcasted speech, General S. Barre explained the reason behind the take-over:

"I would like to state clearly the reason for the take-over of the country by Armed Forces. I want our people to know that everything is going on as usual and that no problems have arisen as a result of the Revolution. The entire country is in the hands of the National Army and the Police Force. Intervention by Armed Forces was inevitable. It was no longer possible to ignore the evil things like corruption, bribery, nepotism, theft of public funds, injustice and disrespect to our religion and the laws of the country. The laws were thrust aside and people did whatever they wanted. No group or family can live happily if they do not respect their laws and regulations. There will be no development or any sort of progress for a nation if the laws of the country are forgotten. The corruption has culminated in the assassination of prominent leaders of the country. Somalia was on the point of collapse, not economically and politically alone, but disaster threatened historically and nationally as well. If we look back on recent events in the country, we will see how a peaceful land was changing to violence. Abdirashid Ali Sharmarke, the late president, was assassinated by a simple soldier who did not know him and who had no quarrel with him. We will not give a chance to wrong doers and law breakers.

We will abolish bribery, nepotism and tribalism. Tribalism was the only way in which foreigners got their chance of dividing our people. We will close all roads used by colonialists to enter our country and into our affairs. We will build up a great Somali nation, strongly united and welded together to live in peace. We will make sure the people respect the Islamic religion, if necessary, by all the force and strength we have. We will make Somalia a respected country in its internal and external policies. I would like to ask all Somalis to come out and build their nation, a strong nation, to use all their efforts, energy, wealth and brains in developing their country. At all costs avoid begging. The Imperialists, who always want to see people in hunger, disease and ignorance, will oppose us in order that we may beg them. They will spread many types of lies to try to misinterpret our noble aims and objectives.

They will try to persuade the world, and even other African states, to believe their lies. Apart from these lies, they will call us many evil names. They are, at present, collecting arms, money and many other necessary things for them to work against us. We are very happy and thankful to see the unity of the Armed Forces and the Somali population. The nation has given us true support for which we are very grateful. Nothing will harm us if we go on supporting each other for the sake of our country and nation. Lets us join hands in crushing the enemy of our land." - Barre, 1969

Notable Achievements

The Supreme Revolutionary Council established large-scale public works programs and successfully implemented an urban and rural literacy campaign, which helped dramatically increase the literacy rate. In addition to a nationalization program of industry and land, the new regime's foreign policy placed an emphasis on Somalia's traditional and religious links with the Arab world, eventually joining the Arab League (AL) in 1974. That same year, General Barre also served as chairman of the Organization of African Unity (OAU), the predecessor of the African Union (AU).

One of the principal objectives of the revolutionary regime was the adoption of a standard national writing system. Shortly after coming to power, Barre introduced the Somali language (Af Soomaali) as the official language of education, and selected the modified Latin script developed by the Somali linguist Shire Jama Ahmed as the nation's standard orthography. In 1972, all government employees were ordered to learn to read and write Somali within six months. The reason given for this was to decrease a growing rift between those who spoke the colonial languages, and those who didn't.

The Downfall

Part of Barre's time in power was characterized by oppressive dictatorial rule, including persecution, jailing and torture of political opponents and dissidents.

By the mid-1980s, more resistance movements supported by Ethiopia's communist Derg administration had sprung up across the country. Barre responded by ordering punitive measures against the clans he perceived as locally supporting the guerillas, especially in the northern regions. The clampdown included bombing of cities, with the northwestern administrative center of Hargeisa, a Somali National Movement (SNM) stronghold, among the targeted areas in 1988. The bombardment was led by General Mohammed Said Hersi Morgan, Barre's son-in-law, and resulted in the deaths of many civillians in the north.

Other Ethiopian-backed rebels who fought Barre's regime include; SSDF, USC and SPM, all of which were clan-based rebellion.

Eventually, the rebels, who lacked a shared post-Barre vision for the country, succeeded in ousting Barre and forced him out of the capital, throwing the country into chaos and civil war.

Barre's regime came to an end on 26th January, 1991.

My Note

Even though the Somali people have grown widely apart and portions of our history may be considered as contentious, and sometimes polarising, we should preserve every bit of our history, celebrate the positive, learn from the negative and use it to build a better future for the generations to come.

#kacaan #revolution #somalia #October #Socialism #Socialist

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jacobmybeloved · 6 years ago

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About the character

Tagged by: @farcry5-obsessions because she said i could XD 😘

Tagging: anyone who wants to do it and i’m wayyy too lazy to list and it’s busy af at work :)

― your muse’s name:

Ramona King but also goes by the name Raven.

― two headcanons you have for your muse:

Before the Collapse, Ramona was a police officer. She tried to maintain some sense of order following the Collapse, but law and order had gone out of the window pretty quick. Her close friend Vince (whom she’s bailed out of jail on multiple times) convinced her to join his raider group: The Highwaymen. Seeing no other alternative, she joined for the sake of her daughter Dayana.

Ramona may be cruel, and she may be a bit theatrical and over the top, but she’s motherly at heart. She purposely sent her daughter Dayana away with Mickey and Lou to “toughen” her up, wanting her daughter to take her place as Highwaymen leader in the south when she’s gone and to be able to fend for herself. The two are often at odds with one another so takes interest in Malik Thomas Seed, hoping to make him her “son” and heir to her empire.

― three things that your muse likes doing in their free time:

Watching the fight pits, spending time with her two crocodiles, and reading.

― seven people your muse loves/likes:

Dayana, Malik, Vince, herself (lma0), everyone else is beneath her.

― a phobia your muse has:

Autophobia- fear of being abandoned by someone.

#ramona raven king #far cry new dawn #fcnd oc

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lucyyh · 6 years ago

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Ranting: Arrow 7x14

Ok, First and foremost:

DIAZ IS DEAD!!!

Second, I like the episode. I enjoy the whole Ninth Circle, Dante thing. I found it interesting, and even Diaz wasn't as boring as always. FF were also interesting! I think they improve a lot when it's only Will and Mia. I wouldn't mind either Connor, but the rest (yes, including Roy), I can totally do without them.

Anyway, let's jump in:

Flashforwards:

As I say, they were interesting. We finally have some info worth all the episodes we have to suffered through them. Mia putting in their place to Dinah and Zoe was awesome, and Will siding with her in less than a minute was great too. He was actually mad at DD for assuming Felicity was dead, without checking her info, and I think the fact that DD nor Roy didn't have a clue about Oliver and Felicity having a child, will maybe making him wary of trusting them. Because if them, his parents team didn't have a clue about something as huge as a baby, then his parents maybe didn't trust them as much, did they?.

I have read some theories about the little cassette containing proof that Oliver and Felicity never stop loving, and trying to contact William, and that it possibly has some more info about what is happening in Star City...and yes, I completely agree. Felicity wouldn't have contacted William without offering him some sort of answers: she probably knew William wasn't her and Oliver's biggest fan. I don't believe for one second that Felicity didn't keep tabs on Will after whatever happened that got Oliver killed, and the city going to shit. But I think she stay away from him, to protect him. Mia heavily hinted that Felicity was paranoid, always seeing danger at every dark corner, and the way she raised her; all these tells me she was trying to protect Mia from all the threats and people that probably was after her. I think she didn't feel it was fair to have Will in her life, with all the shit she was dealing with. So she let him believed they (Oliver and her) had abandoned him. For his own good.

I'm not saying this was the best decision. Or a good one. But as William said "Parents aren't perfect. They love us the best way they can". And I think Felicity not involving William on all the shit that She and Mia went through, it was the best way she could show William she loved him.

It's sad, what Felicity became without Oliver. It shows us how much they depend on each other, and that without the other, they aren't complete.

I'm leaving Oliver out because until this moment, it seems like he hasn't been a part of Mia and Felicity's lives for a long time.

Emiko:

Eh. I don't know. Her attitude just annoys me. Now more since we know she is working with Dante. Talk about another person betraying Oliver *rolleyes* I supposed her whole "I blame you for what your father did to my mom and I" is just a way to make Oliver feel guilty and making him trust her. I'm holding judgement, because her scene with Dante...she didn't seem too pleased to see him, or the fact that he wanted her back "home".

Felicity and BS:

Good scenes. Still don't know what to do about their "friendship", but ok. It was weird that BS knew Felicity was pregnant, just because she was eating too much chocolate, and there wasn't any wine or coffe in the counter...I could buy it, if it BS has children, because I know women with children can sometimes tell when someone is pregnant (My mom knew my older sister was pregnant months before my sister finally told her), but...ok, it seemed to me they made BS telling Felicity she knew just so she had something to do this episode. Her only scenes where with Felicity and revolved around Felicity's pregnancy...so yeah, there's that.

Also, BS was suspiciously good in this episode, giving a pep talk about how Diaz was under A.R.G.U.S. custody, so they didn't need to kill him. It was @1-crazy-dreamer who pointed out in our talk, that she could have been fooling Felicity, acting like a good girl; so no one would suspect it was her when she kill Diaz.

Dante and the ninth circle:

This is the villain we deserve a season and a half ago. I do believe that guy can be a match for Oliver. The whole thing is a mystery, and I'm fine with it.

A.R.G.U.S.:

So...there's people from the Ninth Circle working inside A.R.G.U.S. That would explain why the agency is evil in the future, and why Dante has so much first hand info. Infiltrating the lines of an off the grid government agency is the best way to expand their net and protect their organization.

DIGGLE:

FINALLY. FINALLY JOHN DIGGLE ACKNOWLEDGE HE WAS AN IDIOT, AND THAT HE ABANDONED FELICITY TO PROTECT HIS JOB.

I liked their OTA conversation at the beginning. Felicity being cute, before getting angry af at Diggle was the best. I liked too that Oliver was the one trying to cool things down between Felicity and Digg, so no one would say something and later regret it.

Oliver was is jail when Digg and Felicity were at odds, and Diggle wasn't supporting Felicity. What he knows is that Digg doesn't do things just because (although to be fair his reasons never were clear), so he tries to make Felicity see this. The problem is...he wasn't there. So he didn't see his wife alone, abandoned by the one friend she thought she could always count on. I think he should have been more supportive to Felicity here. He later acknowledged he hasn't been the most understanding, so I forgive him.

Back at Diggle. I think Curtis leaving, and the conversation with Felicity finally made him realised he had abandoned the people he considers his family. He deciding to catch Diaz instead of going after Dante, and later apologizing to Felicity about what he did before, it's a good, a great start to have mend their friendship.

Him taking the fallout instead of Lyla, is another sign that he is going back to the Digg we all missed and love.

Oliver and Felicity:

I said it before, I didn't like much that Oliver didn't fully support Felicity in their first conversation with Diggle. But I did like that later he told her he didn't fully realize or understand the pain she was dealing with. It shows FINALLY, that he isn't totally clueless as to what is happening with his wife. And he supporting her, whatever her decision was in regards to Diaz, was great. He may not agree with her wanting to kill Diaz, but he was ready to support her (and I suppose help her if she needed it), if she decided to kill Diaz. Also, I loved when he told her "I think there's a better way". It shows how much Felicity has inspired him to be better, to the point where he reminds her of something she told him a long time ago. It not only shows growth, but also that he will be there for when she needs him to remind her she doesn't have to go the dark path to protect their family.

The reveal was cute. There should have been a kiss and some kitchen counter sex but ok...Oliver's face when she told him...ALL THE FEEEEELS!

And how great is seeing Feliciy on pajamas?

Also: HE LOOKED AT HER, ALL THE EPISODE. WOW. YES THANK YOU.

All in all, Olicity was super fantastic, and I want more Olicity of this kind.

DIAZ:

THE LIZARD WAS ROASTED, HOW AWESOME IS THAT???

I said it when I was talking about Laurel and Felicity, and I think that BS setting him on fire is posible. I WANT HER TO BE THE ONE WHO DID IT.

Just two scenes of DD.

Overall, I love the episode. I wasn't expecting much, and it deliver so beautifully!!

That's all.

#arrow spoilers #my arrow rants #arrow S7 #arrow speculation #sort of #arrow commentary #arrow 7x14 #arrow

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steve0discusses · 6 years ago

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Yugioh S2 Ep 41: It’s Mai’s Turn to Get Electrocuted

Hey guys, welcome to the Christmas Break.

It’s TV watching season, so lets watch some TV and over-analyze a 20 yo kid’s show, you in?

Odion, after suffering from a lightning strike and getting impaled by many pieces of that fake millennium rod he was holding gets dropped off in the only room on this blimp that has sheets. He also had the added shock of witnessing his brother morph into a somewhat evil-er dude with saiyan hair, which I dunno, I’d want to take a nap too, that’s a lot to deal with.

(And thanks to some reader input, turns out this Marik isn’t so much a ghost situation so much. I mean, I guess it’s more of a Season Zero --this is your deep down scary personality taking over-- type thing but it’s not like I really finished Season Zero so...We’re just rolling with it.)

Glad we have an actual hospital wing--confused as to why Bakura isn’t here.

But I guess lightning strike is slightly worse than having a bleeding stab wound for 12 hours. I mean I’m no doctor, maybe it is? Anyway, Odion is hooked up to all sorts of computers and life support although there aren’t any cords attached to him anywhere on his body. Not even one piss-yellow IV bag.

Check out the size of that IBM. This is what a widescreen used to look like.

The rest of the Yuge Crew are here although I’m pretty sure that’s not how hospitals work. Pretty sure you have to be related to drop on in directly after being put in intensive care but like, they are on a blimp so I guess it’s different up there. But also, this guy has abducted them once already and just tried to kill Joey for the second time, and now they are like “We’re basically on BFF family terms with this Odion guy, lets visit that bedside.”

Although, mind you, his real family is Marik and Ishizu, both of which have never said aloud that Odion is their brother. This family is sort of bad at life, TBH.

Since we’re barrelling right into a Mai arc we have to confront one of her 2 big Mai character conflicts--which is either “this is why I don’t get married” or “OMG I am going to die forever alone.” Which is interesting, because last time we hung out with her, we did whatever we could to keep her independent, while in this episode Mai mourns that being independent is the ultimate curse. Girl wants whatever she doesn’t have, pretty much.

Ah, Miss independent, never thought I’d get that song stuck in my head again. Thanks, Mai. Except in this version, instead of falling in love, Mai just makes weird friendships with jail bait teenagers. Why can’t she make friends with like, Roland? He’s her age. Or maybe this nice doctor? But whatever, age is meaningless on this show.

(read more under the cut)

Anyway, Joey has decided to tell us all about that dream he had but leaves out the parts where he dropped everything he owns, and then knocked himself over a desk onto his face, and then in the same dream Kaiba kinda walked in from off screen, dunked on him, and then walked directly off screen again.

Mai is deeply touched.

And then, because she is Mai, gets extremely offended immediately afterward.

I can keep hoping it’ll be Duke Devlin but like...as much as I want him to do more on this show, I really think the only people who remember Duke Devlin at this point are all the animators who were like “HOW many people are in this shot?! Why did we make a season where every scene is a freakin crowd scene!?”

*I know the shading on her ass was supposed to be attractive but it looks like nasty sweat stains*

(Also what the hell computer-machinery is supposed to be behind them in this scene?)

This one time where Joey doth protest too much is the first time we have ever, ever on this show seen Joey act less than vague towards Mai. During the dream episode he blushed, but I thought that was because of Serenity being there for her brother in his dream. I didn’t at all think that was over Mai at the time.

But I guess this is happening now? I mean people kept saying “yes, Joey and Mai will be a thing” and I was like “they better start building up to that because like...nothing is happening.” but this show’s version of building up to that was by just not being vague one single time.

Which in this show is a big deal, I guess. Because shortly after this event, Tea remembers that her character description sheet says “Is bossy AF” with red underline and was like “OMG I totally forgot and it’s been like 20 episodes since I did anything, I gotta hurry” and she just lost her lid.

I’m regretting more and more that joke I made that TeaxKaiba was way more reasonable than TeaxYugi, because sometimes when Tea goes ham she may as well be wearing a long spiky coat with boots leggings. Tea had two very different personalities way before she ever got possessed by Bakura. Like, Tea is kind of a monster actually, but we rarely get to see it because she gets completely distracted and cries a lot when it just feels like...the other half of her, the half that bit a guy once--like she legit bit a guy on this show--that side of Tea would just never cry over cards. Or cry, period. She sure wasn’t crying when she bit that guy!

This is mostly because I think the writers didn’t know how to write a girl like Tea since she’s a mix of a Season Zero Tea and this more old fashioned-’feminine’ version I think they were trying to turn her into for this series. It’s weird. It’s weird that this group of friends have nothing to say about these very abrupt changes in her behavior. Then again, it took them a while to notice the abrupt changes in Yugi.

Anyway, Joey isn’t done getting harassed by everyone he knows yet.

We have Marik trapped in a blimp in the sky and the entire Kaiba security force, why are we dueling him anymore? I mean I know why, we are contractually obligated to show lots of card content in this show to sell cards, but at this point I feel like maybe they should drive the blimp over international waters and resort to maritime law. Give Kaiba a gun.

Actually don’t do that, it would be bad. Don’t give Kaiba a gun. Give it to Duke or something, he seems stable enough. He seems like he’d be able to shoot somebody but not everybody, if you know what I mean.

And because it’s the Mai arc, we gotta have Mai duel next. There’s only 3 people left to go against: Ishizu, Kaiba, and Marik. I think. There’s so many people on this show. Tea isn’t playing, right? I mean I really do feel like like I’ve forgotten someone--maybe Shadi? Miho? So many people are on this blimp.

Whatever, I’ll just roll with it, if I forgot someone I’m sure they’ll show up at some point.

Mai sure is that girlfriend.

Anyway, lets see what Marik’s up to. Ah, he really is visiting his older brother after all.

That’s right--Marik has to play twice. I mean obvi the first Marik was Odion, but still, it just feels like it’s Marik playing twice.

Also can we please talk about Marik’s cargo pants obsession for a little bit? This arch villain is in CARGO PANTS. Like, they have puffy pockets. He figured out that the hoodie was a bad look, but then he was like “I’ll just cover my tum-tum, and then put on my khaki cargo pants with a sensible belt.”

It just sort of insinuates that Marik only owns cultist robes and cargo pants. Just those two things. Imagine if every pant in your closet was cargo pants. Just imagine with me. You’d go mad, too. Imagine you packed for a trip, a nice vacay on a blimp, and then you opened your luggage and you were like “oops! all cargo pants!” you’d fly home.

Marik looks like he’s going to Casual Khaki’s Friday at the office from about the stomach down, and then stomach up up he’s ready to join piccolo and fuse brains or whatever the hell goes on in Dragonball Z.

And Yugi and his friends are late to Mai’s duel because they are teenagers and also of course they would. This whole season was introduced with Yugi being chronically late to stuff.

The bathroom joke in this episode is canon, PS. I skipped a Season Zero episode where Tristan went to the loo and so Yugi held his spot in line and it took like 30 minutes before Tristan finally got back. Tristan’s epic poops have apparently been Yugioh canon since the very beginning.

I’m learning so much about the lore.

Now that Marik no longer has to hide who he is, he has decided that he’ll just use the Shadow Realm willy-nilly now. Although Marik did this without playing any cards at all, it doesn’t seem to register to Seto Kaiba that this is not a hologram. Maybe Kaiba sneezed when Marik summoned it and just assumed he missed a card play or something.

So now, for our gimmick!

Every time we fight in the Shadow Realm it feels like the rules are a little bit different, and Marik decided to make this duel a memory fight.

The Shadow Realm seems to eat on your greatest insecurities, and for Mai it’s feeling all alone. Not sure how that works once the duel is over--her friends will still be there, so like...she can just get a heads up on the one day they went camping that one time and then boom, friendship rekindled, I think. But for now, this is very scary for everyone involved.

But I mean at least she isn’t a playing card, or being thrown into a graveyard by being played as a card, or being devoured by gloopy blobs, or rapidly dying because of the exposure to the shadow zone. As far as Shadow Realms go this one seems kind of tame.

But I guess we shall see if somehow losing Tea will effect her story in any way.

Depends on which Tea, in my opinion, but if we’re going for the normal boring one that only cries wellllllll I wouldn’t notice if she were gone, just saying. Now, if it’s the fun Tea that bites people and yanks their ears off their face, well being forced to lose my memories of her is what the writers do to me basically every episode of this show. Let Tea bite more people in the arm. Let that girl rage.

But all that will be for another recap where we can all watch Mai get Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind-ed as if a memory wipe hasn’t happened at least once to every single person on this show with the exception of Mokuba. And Mokuba was a paper card for like I want to say about 10 episodes, so...

Anyways, if you just got here I do have these in chrono order from s1 ep1, here is a link.

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weaselle · 6 years ago

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I put them both in one post.

I have a brother 10 years older than me and a younger brother and sister 5 and 7 years younger than me respectively. I call the older by his name, and also “dude” a lot. You know those twisty metal puzzles you have to figure out how to take apart or put back together, like puzzle rings and shit? He can do those in seconds without even thinking about it, like, idly while talking to you. He’s a daredevil bombs and blades tinkerer, and a practical joker. Once he told me he was getting out of the lake because it was noon and that’s when the sun shone straight down to the bottom and woke IT up, and then got out and snuck halfway around the lake to climb back in and swim up from underneath me to wrap a hand around my ankle and suddenly yank me down about ten feet at an angle toward the center of the lake. He went to jail for building a bomb, it’s a good thing they never found his other homemade weapons, like arrows with exploding tips, or the underslung potato gun mounted to the frame of his car. And I SAY potato gun but I saw him use his tester model to launch a wad of duct tape through a truck camper shell at the junk yard in the R&D phase, and he use to load it with a wad of something for batting topped by a snapple cap and a handfull of roofing nails and disintegrate mail boxes with it. He is a good wood sculptor and has a surprisingly delicate yet raw style when drawing with charcoal or graphite. He can take apart and put together almost anything. I could just write a whole book about his antics.

With my younger brother it’s mostly his name and “dude” quite often. Every once in a while, I will call him bro, or brother, but usually when I am low-key reinforcing our age difference. Like if he thought mom would react one way to something, but I had seen her reaction to that same thing before he was born or whatever, like, brother, I’ve known her longer. He is one of two people I know personally who may be legit geniuses. He used to play video games in the early 90′s by hacking their code and modding them - I’d walk in and he’d be 12 years old like “Instead of cannon balls, I made the cannon shoot cows that bounce around randomly a few times and explode, and I’m trying to make it so that each time a cow bounces, it spawns another bouncing cow bomb”. He has a… I want to say a Masters in Physics. His math teacher in high school tried to hold his interest by having him teach the first 15 minutes of each class. Once when the rest of us siblings were all standing around talking about sneaking out of the house, we asked if he ever did and he was like “why would I sneak out in the middle of the night… that’s when I sleep.” Now he’s a very mellow polyamorous hacker who brews his own beer and “isn’t allowed to tell you where I work, it’s so silly”

Our youngest I call by her name, and dude a fair amount, and a combination of the word sister and her name (like if her name was Brittany I would call her Sisttany) I do call her sister more than I use brother for my fraternals, but she calls us all brother quite a bit. I think there are some complex reasons for that, but it boils down to her having been teased terribly and given a very hard time growing up by us, her brothers, who had a certain alliance against her. Of course by now we’re forced to admit that she is awesome and special and maybe the best of all of us. Certainly the coolest. Like, my younger brother is hella cool on paper, but when you’re in a room with him, he’s a little.. the only way he pulls it off is by truly not giving a fuck if people think he’s cool, which, as we all know, instantly awards coolness to whatever you’ve got going. On the other hand, when my sister is in a room, people laugh when she decides something is funny. Someone else is often making the decisions, but everyone only agrees to go along with them if sheagrees with them. She’s not wearing those clothes because they are cool, those clothes are cool because she’s wearing them, Once she worked at the same hotel I did for a while, and I asked her what she thought of it, and she said “I only ever want to work in a hotel again if I OWN it”. She was 19. She once knocked out her (now ex) boyfriend for forcefully taking his car keys away from her too roughly when he’d been drinking. He realized what he’d done too late to save him and she pulled him down from the fence he was climbing to get away from her so she could lay him out. She ran her own business for a while doing marketing stuff for publications and wineries and things, but she felt she was working too hard for the return she was seeing, and now she works for some firm overseeing the people who manage their social media or something.

And then there’s me, the Bard of the group, basically. I travel around on lots of adventures (I was arrested by the US airforce in Germany, I got stuck in England for a summer when they took my passport away from me at Heathrow - I stayed at a circus school with a few of the circus students who had no real home to go back to for the summer, and I put together a circus busking group with some of them and that’s how I made enough money to eat every day.) I used to write and produce full length comedies for the stage. I was SO sure I was going to be a con-artist, so I studied slight of hand and magic ( I ran a crooked poker game at recess) but as a young adult, when I picked my first pocket, I found I had no taste for stealing from real people (I’ll fuck up Coke any day, where’s Amazon’s pocket? Side note: I tapped the guy on his shoulder and handed his wallet back to him and said “I think you dropped this” and never picked a pocket again, but I can still do some pretty interesting stuff with cards and coins and things, Juggle knives and torches. that sort of stuff). Anyway, I adventure, and I write songs and stories, and my siblings mostly call me by my name, and very occasionally, dude. Also, my origins are steeped in mystery and my siblings are actually my cousins by blood, but that’s another story. Okay, here is that story.

My Grandmother was left-handed and the reason I love cooking and definitely some kind of Being. Her title was The Grandma. She had 4 great grandchildren by the time she died, and so her daughters became Grandma, but she was THE Grandma. She had this way about her, like she was incredibly present, but also paying attention to everything in the whole world. And then sometimes (notably when you fucked up) it was like she pulled her attention off all those things and put the whole thing on you; it was very unsettling. And she had the Voice, which she almost never used.

The last time Grandma traveled on an airplane with us, we were going though security and she couldn’t go through the metal detectors because by then she couldn’t get out of the wheelchair for longer than twenty seconds at a time. The TSA agent said she was going to search her or pat her down instead, and reached for my Grandmother. And Grandmother said, in the Voice

“Don’t touch The Grandma”

The TSA agent blinked and looked at grandma’s eldest daughter (a celtic witch if ever there was one) who merely shrugged and said “…don’t touch the grandma”.

TSAgent hesitated as if about to reach forward and insist, thought better of it, called TSA Supervisor over. TSA Supervisor explained everything to The Grandma - it’s just a quick pat-down, everybody who can’t go through the detectors has it done, they won’t even ask her to stand - and then reached forward to pat down my grandmother

“Don’t. Touch. The Grandma”

TSA Supervisor’s hands stopped as if hitting glass. She looked confusedly back and forth between the TSA agent and my grandmother for a second, and then the confusion left her face and she stepped aside, looked at the TSA agent and said “Don’t touch the Grandma” and waived us through security. They didn’t even scan the rest of us

It’s a shame she couldn’t fly anymore after that, she loved to fly; when her first husband died, she married P, a WW2 B52 crewman who taught her to pilot small planes, and they would fly up and down the coast to any cities they wanted to visit - she knew the West Coast in a way few people do.

One morning in the deserts of Nevada a year after P’s death she woke me up and said “get dressed, were going to into town to the casino; P visited me in a dream last night and told me I’d win a video poker jackpot with a royal flush today” and we drove into town so she could spend fifteen minutes playing video poker. I say fifteen minutes, because after fifteen minutes she hit her jackpot with a royal flush in hearts, and we went back home.

She used to sit in her chair in her living room with her back to the kitchen wall, and I’d go to leave the kitchen and I’d hear her from the other room “don’t you leave my kitchen mat like that” and I’d look over my shoulder at the mat in front of the sink, and sure enough, it would be all rumpled up; sorry grandma.

Grandma and I shared a birthmark, a red stain I won’t describe fully. And my grandmother and I were both adopted. Let me explain.

My Grandmother was adopted by a nice family.

And then that family all died, and she was adopted AGAIN.

She grew up and married a man whose Irish father I am named after: K, who came here from Ireland to work the Alaskan gold rush. She and her husband lived with his father K for a while, and this is a story about that:

Every Sunday. great grandpa K would go off on his own for a couple hours to “walk in the woods”. Grandma followed him one day. K walked into the woods, packed a pipe, sat down with his back to a tree, and took a small handful of nuts and seeds and fruits and leaves out of his shirt pocket. He scattered them around. Soon, as if expecting him, several animals came and helped themselves. The squirrels climbed all over him, on his head even. The raccoons sat in his lap. The birds sat on his knees and shoulders and in his beard and peered into his face. The deer checked his jacket for more snacks. After they hung out for about an hour, they all went on their way. Then K smoked his pipe and went home.

Grandma and K’s son had 5 kids.

One died as a child.

The eldest became an ER nurse and a savant witch. She would never admit she is a witch, but there’s a horseshoe over her door (not the front door, mind you, but the door she actually uses) and she’s the one who taught me to always leave a single spider in your house when you clean. She has a natural way with plants and animals - the deer eat everything but her herb garden, which isn’t even fenced. This year one of them stayed in her backyard for nearly two months raising twins to be big enough to take back to the herd. She recognizes the individual squirrels and birds in her yard and knows their personalities and habits and things about their families. And of course as an ER and ICU nurse, she’s a hell of a healer.

The youngest was a witch, but sadly neglected, remained immature. Still, she had talents. She could fool people and make them laugh as easy as breathing, like some kind of glamour. Every long line of strangers she ever waited in became a party among friends. Could literally smell if you were lying to her. As in, she’d lean close and take a couple deep sniffs and then be like “Nope. Tell me, where did you really go after school?”

The only brother became a wandering holy man of sorts. Used to hitch-hike around the country in robes and junk, with a small, like, cult; then he quit them to just grow his own holy experience. He died in his 30s.

And the middle sister was my mother. She was double jointed and very dyslexic, and everyone says she was incredibly gifted in many ways. She did intricate artwork in ink, fractal gardens and faux woodgrain that was made of salvador dali faces, stuff like that. She was self taught on the piano, used to just walk up to a piano and play songs she made up on the spot that sounded how she was feeling and little crowds would gather. Made her own exercise equipment. Could pick up an accent within minutes and become semi-conversational in days. She had me with a half Japanese guy in the Air Force (he didn’t stick around). Then when I was about three, she sent me to live with her eldest sister, because her life got too, ah, interesting. Like, her partner had a hit put out on them. It wasn’t safe for me. By the time I was six it all caught up with her, and she died in an accident when she jumped out of the passenger side of a car and tried to run away as it stopped at a red light.

That’s when her eldest sister adopted me. The paperwork was messed up and my name is different on my birth certificate, my SS card, and my ID. Then, the person who filled out the “messed up” paperwork was fired, but I’m still a mystery to the bureaucratic world.

So here I am, same birthmark as my psychic grandmother, orphaned son of a savant creative criminal and a Japanese-American soldier, named after my Irish, gold hoarding, bearded, pipe-smoking beastmaster great-grandsire; raised by a celtic witch, hidden away from the official world. Sometimes I feel like all those hero origin stories are trying to call me out of hiding. More about my adventures soon.

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