#masculine spy??? femme spy?????

[homkamiro]

"nice dress, spy! heheh"

"don't get so jealous, we'll buy some for you too"

[the-river-rix]

*taps mic* Owen Carvour and Curt Mega are both gnc (but in diff ways)

[akkivee]

me: *going about my day*🙂

the brain: hey remember how you said ichijiku and ramuda are the only two people we’ve heard crying over a loss of life and purpose???? ramuda had this whole character arc where he came to terms with hating everything he’s done now that he sees he has better options and ichijiku is going thru the exact same thing with nemu telling her that they could be better which makes ichijiku and ramuda parallels of each other—

me: 🫠

[the-laughing-lunatic]

headcannons for spy, medic, scout, and sniper, with a transmasc S/O?

(Hell yea man, trans guy myself so this is right up my alley B) Thx for requesting! :D)

Spy, Medic, Scout and Sniper w/ a trans masc S/O!

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ─── 

☆Spy☆

He took up drag both femme + masc in his younger years to help his disguises, so he’ll help you look more masculine 

“Mon chéri, you really must stop using gauze to bind, it is not doing your chest or yourself any favors. If you don’t have a proper binder you can use pantyhose, you know.”

He’d take you to help you get a tailored suit and put on a tie if you were never taught as a child

When you get the horrors (dysphoria and or period ) he’ll stay with you to help you in his smoking room

“Darling, will you please stop grabbing my knife so you’ll respawn without your period? It’s not gonna work, you’ve tried it before.”

“Ugh, fine. …can I pretty please get a kiss then?”

“...You’re not getting the cyanide in my teeth either.”

“Come on!”

☆Medic☆

He’s pretty well versed in this kind of thing, as an ex-doctor who isn’t bound by the law at all he’s definitely performed gender-affirming surgeries in secret in the past (for the price of a few unnecessary organs or course)

He’d offer to do your top + bottom surgery for the boyfriend discount of not stealing any of your body parts

He’s completely fine if you don’t want that though 

“It doesn’t matter what you have in your pants, schatz, what matters is that you have a man’s heart.”

“Aw, Ludwig—”

“And a man's kidney, lungs, ohoho! And an especially manly appendix.”

(it’s medic he’s gonna be a little silly)

The second you mention you’re on your period he immediately gets so much stuff for you, painkillers, a hot water bottle, blankets and snacks for you

Will pamper the hell out of you

If you’re getting hit with dysphoria he’ll reassure you

“I just- I just don’t feel like a man right now.”

“You? Not a man? Nonsense! If you weren’t a man, I wouldn’t be dating you, now would I?”

“I know, but-”

“But nothing, you are sehr männlich, and my mein Freund, those silly thoughts won’t change that.”

☆Scout☆

You’re gonna need to help him out a little bit

“So like– you’re a guy right? But you got a girl’s body or whatever, so is this gay or not?”

“It’s gay, Jeremy.”

“Okay, okay, just double-checkin’.”

If you’re on your period he tries to help in the main way he does with you: cuddles

He’d wrap his arms around your waist from behind and hold you and the hot water bottle pressed to your stomach close to him

Kisses your neck and just rambles about how handsome you are

“You’re a real hot guy, y’know that, prince? Jus’ makes you even stronger that you go through all this shit.”

“Shut up.”

“You picked the wrong guy to date if you wanted someone who could shut up, hotcakes. You’re stayin’ here and hearing about how handsome you are for a while.”

☆Sniper☆

Bro does not give a shit imma be real

“Mate, I couldn’t care less whether or not you’re a gal, a bloke, or a bloody alien. You’re sweet, and ya make me smile.”

Def relates to you with not fitting in with the other kids in childhood

If you’ve had top surgery y’all are chest scar bfs

When you get dysphoric he’ll get you two to do stuff to distract you

[quick, instantaneous, sudden] camping trips, hunting, hiking, or even trying to shoot at the blu base for funsies

Can’t be dysphoric when you’re running for your life, right?

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

[as8bakwthesage]

My TF2 Sexualities/Genders Headcanons

Scout - closeted bisexual and biromantic (prefers women and femme presenting folks) / cisgender (he/him) and doesn't understand gender stuff too much Soldier - heteroromantic and heterosexual / cisgender (he/him) also doesn't understand gender stuff Pyro - aromantic and asexual (very much sex repulsed) / unknown but probably masc presenting (any/all) Heavy - homoromantic and demisexual (doesn't tend to date often, he prefers friends) / cisgender (he/him) and is very well read on trans stuff Demo - biromantic and bisexual (very open about this, will flirt, preference for men) / transgender (he/him) and is very stealth. His relationship with gender is funky. /pos Sniper - biromantic and asexual (sex favourable/positive with a romantic preference for androgynous folks) / demi-man (he/they) (he blames Hacker for converting him to the enbie side) Medic - biromantic and aceflux (sometimes he's favourable, sometimes he's neutral, with a preference for anybody. He used to think he was gay for the longest time.) / cisgender (he/they) but is very comfortable in dressing however he damn-well pleases Spy - heteroromantic and heterosexual (he likes the ladies and thinks sleeping with men is gross <-- personal preference, absolutely supports the gays) / cisgender (he/him) and doesn't like dressing non-masculine (he has an unhealthy relationship with feminity at times unfortunately. He's working through it.) Engie - homosexual and homoromantic (this man is so fucking gay like wtf--) / cisgender (he/him) and is masculine but has a healthy relationship with feminity Hacker - biromantic and asexual (sex favourable, but a preference for men) / non-binary/transgender (they/them, and sometimes they/him) but presents very andro most of the time, sometimes presents as masc, but almost never as femme

Miss Pauling - homosexual/lesbian and demisexual (she's big gay but not very open about it, also never has the time to date people) / transgender (she/her) she's been on HRT since she was 11.

[aprofessionalwithoutstandards]

This may just be me but I’m tired of medic and spy constantly being the only one that’s getting the gender’nt / feminization / non strictly male treatment. I’m all for putting buff men (and spy) in dresses don’t get me wrong but. It’s always either them two, it’s hard for me to put into words but just because they have traditionally less masculine jobs dosent mean they aren’t as masculine as the other mercs. They’re definitely fruity yes, but so are mercs like demoman and soldier, and you barley see as much art of them in something like a bikini, what I’m getting at is that I need more art of solider in a skin tight dress and feathered hat right the fuck now

Sighs. Another thing I've of multiple minds about. I agree that more gender variance should be , but I disagree with an assessment like "that doesn't mean they aren't as masculine as the other mercs", which is worded in a way that to me at least insinuates that masculinity is by default A Good Thing and that it's in some way bad to "deny" the masculinity of Medic "The Foppish Physician" tf2. "Fem Medic" so you think regular Medic tf2 is masc? Medic is giving butch realness? Medic isn't a femme queen? Like idk the reason people give Medic tf2 "gendern't" (which they don't, really, he's put in dresses because people think it's hot and that's it. Trying to post about trans guy drag queen she/him pronouns Medic tf2 on here is like pulling Fucking teeth) is because he's like almost Definitely coded as SOMETHING like at least a little bit, in ways that most of the other characters are not. I feel like the only reason people insist he's Actually Very Masc in the source is because they think broad shoulders = masculinity or something lmao. However I do generally agree with you, I think people should be more comfortable with a very broad spectrum of gender variance. I notice that Demo gets it very very little, not even in like the hypersexualized Soldier tf2 cowprint bikini way (not complaining btw!), wow I wonder what could be different about Demo that would make people view him as more inherently masculine than the other tf2 guys

[artemis-potnia-theron]

Examining Artemis & the Myth of Actaeon

And discussing transphobia in her worship space

***(tw:sa)

I've seen a lot of people reference Artemis' myths and her often violent retribution against the men in said myths as her disapproval of masculinity in general.

But Artemis' punishment never came without cause, especially in reaction to violent actions/harmful intent. And if you naturally and inherently equate masculinity with violence, that is a wildly transphobic mindset.

She was just as brutal with women who offended her. (Look at the stories of Euthemia, Chione, Niobe and her children) If you take her myths literally/as evidence, you have to accept that as well.

Yes, she has consistently been a protector of women/femmes/female identifying people, but that does not mean that she hates men inherently and without purpose.

Let's look at the story of Actaeon;

"...the story of Actaeon, a young prince and hunter of Thebes in Boeotia who incurred the wrath of Artemis by spying on her as she bathed, is terrifying in its cruelty and gruesome details.

Though some say he came across Artemis by accident, the young man nevertheless failed to avert his gaze, and this voyeuristic violation was met with swift and terrible punishment. Artemis transformed young Actaeon into the very thing he was hunting, a stag, and then incited his loyal hounds to tear him apart in a mad frenzy.

It is not just that the young hunter is torn apart by the very tools (dogs) he has trained and brought with him to tear apart his prey, but the fact that the hunter becomes the hunted due to his inappropriate gaze at the naked body of a woman/goddess.

This young man feels the violation, feels the vulnerability as prey, and experiences the violence of attracting unwanted attention. This myth is profound in its expression of victim psychology, particularly the vulnerability women experience on a daily basis for simply being in their bodies and gazed upon as like prey.

As such, Actaeon experiences the helplessness of being a body of prey firsthand, held against his will and hearing the cheering of his friends before being torn apart by those he trained for his own protection."

- She Who Hunts: Artemis: The Goddess Who Changed the World by Carla Ionescu

I think one of the reasons victims/survivors (like myself) focus on this myth is because it can invoke not only a feeling of catharsis, but also of power. It helped me release a lot of my rage and grief (metaphorically through the use of story).

But this all shifts when Artemis' myths become 'men are all violent scum and Artemis is repulsed by them.' No. No. No. That isn't the same thing as finding meaning in the story of a perpetrator who has to feel the violation, powerlessness, and fear of victims/survivors.

That kind of attitude is the same one as people who believe trans individuals shouldn't be able to use their gendered restroom because 'of the fear/threat of violence' that doesn't exist. If you think like this, you are actively contributing to the contributed oppression of trans and gender nonconforming people.

Think more critically about what this myth is actually speaking to. It is not men=bad. It is instead about violence against women and other vulnerable bodies. Which, I should add, is felt horrifically and brutally in trans/gender nonconforming communities.

Don't use Artemis' myths to support your own transphobia and bigotry. You don't know what you're talking about. You're just using her protective energy to support your hate.

This is a deity that protects with all the ferocity of nature incarnate. She gives so many victims/survivors strength. What right do you have to say that some people deserve that and some people don't?

What right do you have to speak for a goddess in your own bigoted voice?

[myscalesofjustice]

Genderbent names for Spy x Family:

Loid: Locke. It’s the German word for “I lure”, and “loid” refers to a lock picking technique. May as well name femme Twilight after the lock. The nicknames her ass-in-law comes up with are Lolo and Locksie.

Yor: Still Yor. It’s an original name, so there’s no reason it can’t be masculine.

Anya: Ivan or Vanya. Ivan is the equivalent “staple Russian name” for boys, and Vanya is the short form.

Franky: Still Franky, maybe Fran. If that’s the best alias Franky could come up with, I doubt any version of him would do better.

Yuri: Yulia. It’s written as Yurya in Japanese, so there’s hardly a difference.

Damian: Daphne. Greek for laurel, a symbol of fame and victory. Demetrius’ counterpart would be named Drusilla.

Becky: Bobby. I thought it sounded almost like “bomb”.

Handler: Severin. As elegant as Sylvia, and it means “severe”.

Fiona: Finn. The name still means “white frost”, and I’m not messing with that.

[agent-calivide]

Can we talk about how even though Phoenix is “whatever the player is” they are incredibly male coded? Like, the only think keeping this from being about a man is use of they/them pronouns- and while gender is so much more than just your presentation and pronouns, there does come a point where it feels less like a choice and more like a last second sticker slapped on to make it more inclusive. In this tangent, I will be discussing gender through the eyes of binary stereotypes and expectations of the 1960’s, I am well aware that gender is a lot more than just external presentation, this is simply what I’ve noticed as someone who thinks about small details to an unhealthy degree.

For example, throughout the entirety of both games, there is exactly one feminine accessory, a hat in the tutorial level of the second game. This is a game that takes place in the 60’s, where- as silly as it sounds- things like the shape and decoration of hats was incredibly conducive to a gender binary. And every hat, except for the one red one with a bow, is structured in that “men’s fedora” style, or is part of a man’s uniform, like knight helmets or police hats. This may change in the third game, but only one accessory in the entirety of both games isn’t a good track run. Even outside of the hats, you can put on a mustache, but not lipstick. You can put on a wristwatch, but never get a bracelet. If the problem is that it doesn’t fit the setting, then I present to you: The Fabricator’s Workshop. The Fabricator is definitely femme presenting, wearing a large women’s hat, effeminate sunglasses, and indulges in feminine interests like style and elegance. Would it really be too far to say she’d take off an accessory and drop it in a desk drawer so she wouldn’t damage it while working on a project, that we could then interact with after she’s left?

Then, there’s the consumables, specifically the booze and smokes. Throughout the game, you can only smoke cigars, and in the 1920’s-1960’s Cigars we’re seen as the “man’s smokes” while cigarettes were the “women’s smokes”, cigarettes were smaller, daintier cigars. If the issue is that a cigarette would be too small to grab (though doubtful since you’re able to pick up individual screws and eat them in Rising Phoenix) you could add a box of cigarettes just as an aesthetic addition to the office or van.

When we look at the booze, we’re never given the option of “girly” drinks other than wine in Juniper’s cellar- more on that in a second- and this is especially true when it comes to Zor’s offices. Zor is depicted to stock bourbons, whiskeys, and other “men’s” drinks for the time, and seeing how Schell can’t seem to commit to Zor being non-binary in public interviews, it’s safe to say they also perceive these beverages and Zor by extent as masculine.

When we look at Juniper, he does have access to wine, and we can drink copious amounts of it, however, Juniper is far from a “manly” man. He acts, he accessorizes, he collects pretty masks and throws tantrums. At the end of the game, he begs for mercy. Even though he’s a man, he shows a lot of effeminate traits. Juniper is able to be viewed as a man while not being particularly “manly”

There’s also the actual in-game base of Phoenix. Whenever Agent Phoenix starts to suffocate, a recording of what sounds like a man choking plays, and Phoenix’s hands are built in a more thick, boxy shape, both indicators of them being amab. But these both can be chalked up to design choices, programming needs, rendering, and making the hit boxes large enough to function well in the game.

Then there’s fundamentally how Agent Phoenix is a spy. They’re a masculine, James Bond spy. Growing up, I was always shown women spies being put in skinny suits, crawling through vents, and being generally sexy and sensual, James Bond never had to put on a speedo and get tied to a chair while a mind control device played. And Agent Phoenix was a character that I loved because they let me indulge in being James Bond, not just kidnapping and romance fodder, but the hero. The one who blows up a building while flying away in a helicopter like a badass. But, the more I see how the environment was built, the less it feels like it was made for just anyone to be Agent Phoenix.

And I personally feel these sorts of presentations reflected in the fandom too. I’ve seen dozens of conversations where Phoenix is casually called “he”, fandom art where they’re always masculine presenting, if Phoenix is gonna be assigned a gender in a fic, he/him outnumbers she/her almost two to one it feels. Whenever I discussed Phoenix with she/her pronouns, I’d be met with people asking why I’m calling them she/her, but I don’t see that same response to people calling Phoenix he/him.

In truth, I’m really glad I edited my fanfic, Unconventional, even if it had a really bad rough patch of perspective messes for a while when I first started rewriting it from first to third person, then back to first. I found that I leaned really hard into “MY PHOENIX IS A GIRL, AND SHE CAN DO ANYTHING THAT A MAN CAN DO BUT BETTER” because I was incredibly insecure about how my interpretation of Phoenix would be perceived by the eyes of the fandom as a whole.

I’m not saying I want to fire up the game and have it be “CHOOSE YOUR GENDER” where if you pick Female suddenly your telekinesis is pink and Juniper flirts with you through the door. I just wish that when something claimed it was neutral, it was neutral. Not just masculine with they/them pronouns.

[canichangemyblogname]

I blocked this person *before* I posted the original screenshot (and also made sure to block out their User and PFP in my posts), so I am so happy (/sarcasm) to see that the 911 Buddieblr “spy network” is still going strong:

Couple things? Being called “homophobic” for your rhetoric is not itself homophobic, even if you are queer. It is very much possible to be a queerphobic dick when you are yourself queer. Being a member of a protected class does not insulate you from perpetuating lateral violence or from holding reductive views about other queer people yourself. Gay men telling you that you’re supporting “purity culture” with your rhetoric and “fetishizing” queer men also, similarly, is not oppression. We are asking you to see us as human instead of fantasies and your response is “But that hurts my feelings and holding me accountable for homophobic tropes I use is actually a homophobia itself because I’m queer!”

MONTHS. Months of death threats, rape threats, and being spammed with CSAM fics in inboxes. Months of being told that we queer men aren’t actually queer; we’re all fakers and liars who are all actually (exclusively or partially) into women, we just haven’t realized it (or… we are all purposefully lying about who we are) and need to be forcibly “shown” this. Months of being called “Its” and “bummers” and “faggots” by people who proclaim to love and support queer people and queer representation. Months of people calling us groomers and predators for being attracted to men. Months of blogs hoping we’d off ourselves or fantasizing about men like us being executed or hate crimed.

FOR MONTHS, WE HAVE BEEN ASKING YOU TO LOVE THE REAL LIFE QUEER PEOPLE YOU HURT with your rhetoric more than you hate a fictional character for not sucking face with the “right man,” and y’all really said, “Mmm. No.” You cannot even bother to have empathy for the very real queer men who want you not to treat them like fantasies. But—yeah—being called “too sensitive” (over fucking WHAT, may I ask? The daddy joke?) hurt your fucking feelings.

I’d still like you to drop the blog names of the people who are behind these campaigns to call y’all “fake queers.” I’ve seen wide usage of “BoBs” and “Besite Boos,” but certainly not wide queerphobia. I genuinely think the call is coming from inside the house. Have you considered that maybe the fans who keep joking about Buck and Tommy contracting and dying of AIDS may have a queerphobia issue? That the fans who have a history of sending death threats to the actors and harassing them off twitter may have other toxic tendencies? No?

Might the same group of people who have been complaining about how Buck & Tommy are homophobic for being “masculine” (instead of “femme, twink bottoms”) and “straight-passing” have an issue with queer people proving their queerness and meeting arbitrary metrics to be “truly queer?” Might the same group of people who have been arguing that Buck isn’t actually into men, he’s actually into women and Tommy coerced him, have a problem with common bi-phobic rhetoric that bi people are actually just straight? No? It’s the fans who *aren’t* campaigning for ABC to cancel and erase it’s queer representation who are responsible for the proliferation of queerphobic rhetoric on 911blr and who are just… standing by while y’all are bullied.

Drop the names. Who is being called a “fake queer” and who is calling them that? Because don't you think it strange that we people who are incredibly vocal about homophobia, no holds (or blogs) barred, in fandom are suddenly “silent” on this wide queerphobic bullying of buddie stans? I know I have a considerable chunk of this fandom blocked and they have me blocked in turn, specifically for this reason. I know I’ve not made my blog a safe space for that kind of rhetoric, and I find it fascinating you assume any of us do. Is it because the blogs you tolerate this kind of rhetoric from changes based on whether they agree with your fandom takes?

This really feels like a collective DARVO campaign. First it was “That’s not happening, we never said that. Besides, we’re queer, and it’s a harmless joke anyway.” Then it was “What are you getting worked up over, anyways? Why do you have a problem with everything? You all make mountains out of molehills.” And now it’s, “You’ve never stood up for me! I think you’re the real [insert bigotry of your choice]. You’re bullying me!”

I’d personally like to know what fandom they’re in because every third day since May of this year, I have been subjected to takes that include statements like:

Tommy will cheat on Buck because gay men cheat.

Tommy will give Buck an STI because gay men sleep around.

I hope Tommy dies of AIDS.

Tommy is homophobic for dating Buck instead of a “femme twink bottom.”

If I were Buck, I’d have killed Tommy for flirting with me.

If you like Buck x Tommy, you’re just a fetishizer. Even if you’re a queer man. I said what I said.

We should stone Tommy.

M/M romantic relationships have always centered women.

Temu is a predator for dating a grown man who’s younger then him.

Jakey only wants Buck for his body and youth because gay men are shallow and superficial.

Which crime makes you want to execute Tteokbokki the most? Cutting a date short or calling a man by his given name?

Gay men are never actually gay; they just think they are. They actually like women, but don’t realize it or are lying.

Men like T*mmy should be beheaded for flirting with men the way he has with Buck.

Tommy is such a typical gay man, forcing himself on Buck in his loft and turning him gay.

Gay men are all liars, so I don’t expect Buck to put up with Tommy long.

Stereotypes about gay men obvi come from somewhere, and that’s real life! I have good cause to think Tommy will be bad for Buck as a gay man!

Buck’s not actually into men; Tommy is your typical man and pressured/coerced Buck into a relationship.

Tommy and Buck dating makes light of women’s relationship trauma.

Someone needs to tell Buck that he’s actually in love with his best friend!

The gayest thing to ever happen to Buck isn’t kissing a man or the implication he’s had sex with that man, but the one time he told his best friend he’d beat him up.

Buck x Tommy is problematic because they’re both men.

Tommy is a pedo because queer people prey on children and a teen in the show called him “cool” off-screen.

Any number of takes calling fans of 911’s recent decision to expand queer representation by including a same-sex male couple “bummies” or “bummers” << UK queer people have told y’all to knock it off. It’s a slur.

Also any number of takes saying that Buck & Tommy’s relationship feels “off-putting,” “creepy,” “gross,” “weird,” “nauseating,” or “obscene”

If you flirt with men like Tommy, you’re a predator. Simple.

Tommy is a freak and a fetishizer.

Relationships are only meaningful and worthwhile if it’s a slow burn and you more friends for the better part of a decade first.

I think this queer guy is secretly in love with and pining for his (straight) best friend.

Queer guys and straight guys can’t be friends; the attraction gets in the way.

Buck is going to cheat on Tommy because Tommy’s old and has a low libido and Buck’s a bisexual slut.

Tommy is grooming Buck!

So, yeah, I’d like to know what fandom you’re in where people are being homophobic to real queer people for *not* liking Tommy, because all I’ve seen is people literally sending death threats and CSAM fics to queer people—often specifically targeting queer men—who support 911’s newest canon queer couple. It has been MONTHS of targeted harassment. Months. I’d like to know WHO these people are who are harassing queer people in the name of defending a “homophobic queer character,” and then I’d like to know how that character is homophobic.

Please—I beg—tell me how Tommy is a “homophobic” gay man. How is he anything like the self-proclaimed “homophobic gay men” of buddieblr? Do tell. Without relying on any tropes about gay men being predatory. Because the only reason y’all think he is and can and would “groom” or “prey upon” a grown man is based in very popular irl queerphobic stereotypes about queer men. Y’all have spent the last five months essentially saying: “I want to subject this fictional character to violence because of real life false conceptions about men like him.”

[parker-d-bloodrose]

Thinking about how your frogs get boiled when you're in an abusive relationship and you don't know it until it's too late. So like CW for that under the cut and also maybe this is a little venty and personal for me. But it's like "why don't people get away from their abusers" and this sorta stuff is why.

You know sometimes your frog gets boiled and slowly you start to lose your sense of identity because your spouse at the time very strictly enforced the idea of you being high femme and you don't realize that it's abuse because your frog has been boiled by your parents and your mom is definitely abusive and literally threatened to kick you out of the house for growing out your hair. So you think maybe you'd like to try it out for a bit. You realize after a while that no, you prefer your older butch goth look. But your spouse insists you need flowers and color. You don't want them but they guilt you over and over into wearing them. You see a pair of black jeans you desperately want to wear and almost buy them until you remember your spouse admonishing you for not having enough color in your wardrobe.

Your frog is boiling and your spouse pulls you aside one night to show you a drone that somebody is flying and they start talking about how they think that's the government watching them and you're used to this kind of thing already because you grew up around people being paranoid about FEMA and other nonsense, so this at least sounds reasonable because we live in a post 9/11 world. But a part of you doubts the drone that they're talking about is actually a government spy drone. Later they talk about how the governments lasers that can light trees on fire from the inside and that's what is causing the wild fires and you're still like "okay this sounds a bit more outlandish" but you aren't sure how to approach this so you take them seriously.

And now your frog continues to boil. Your spouse tries to make you "eat healthier" because it's good for you and you're like "yeah okay fine" except their belief that your diet is bad because you aren't eating fresh "clean" food and it's mostly frozen stuff or instant noodles. With the occasional fast food thrown in because you just don't want to cook that night. So they try and show you how to cook more food, using fresh ingredients and you earnestly want to learn so you ask questions and they take the utensils away from you in anger and you just let them and don't learn to cook because every time you ask a question it's treated as though you're asking for them to take over and you're not.

And your frog by this point is just so boiled it's barely a frog and you're living together for three years and then they start slowly isolating you from your friends and making it difficult to make any more that they don't approve of and by this point the frog is just. Not even resembling a frog anymore and you're just tired. And you spend more time with your friends and you bitch and complain and don't understand why your mental health is shit and it's because your frog is so boiled and then one day your spouse decides that you've been flirting with one of your friends that you've kept in contact with despite their best efforts to make you end that friendship.

And they decide that yeah you're cheating on them and that yeah you're actually just a horrible person and that maybe you're secretly a lesbian and you're just dating them because they're afab but no you're not their profile picture on okcupid was extremely gender ambiguous and they were presenting as masculine at the time. And then the next thing you know they suggest a break to think things over and you agree and you think maybe it'll be a good thing that you need to do so you can sort out your priorities and maybe everything will work out and you two talk about going to couples therapy and you're all for the idea but you never do. And your frog is less than bones at this point but the boiling has stopped. But you're talking to a friend that wasn't deemed a threat and that friend is like "hey your spouse has been treating you awfully and also maybe don't you think the conspiracy theories were a red flag?" And you like go "oh yeah" because your spouse believed that the government started wild fires with lasers and that they also think there's drones monitoring them and you when it's probably just hobbyists because you lived in a beach town at the time. And you look into your pot and your frog is dead and you realize it's because you haven't had a healthy relationship in a very long time with anybody who wasn't a friend. And you ask for more time when your deadline for your break up with your spouse comes up and you two take another two months and you realize that without your spouse you've actually been feeling better and it's because your frog is getting unboiled and you realize oh okay my spouse is the problem and the final deadline comes up. And your spouse asks if you're getting together again and you say "No" and you try to stay friends but you slowly realize after the last phone call you actually don't care if they never call you again and they dont.

[delta-queerdrant]

everything's subjective nothing lasts (Ex Post Facto, s1 e8)

I take it that some people find "Ex Post Facto" to be a pretty stupid episode but I think it is cute! It has an aesthetic (midcentury noir! aliens with fancy chicken hairdos!) A science fiction take on an unreliable narrator! Detective Tuvok with his very own parlor scene! A space dog that is actually just a dog!

(Apparently the doggo was a chihuahua / Brussels Griffon mix. I had never heard of a Brussels Griffon, which sounds like a philosophy problem or a D&D construct. I really cannot object to it appearing on an alien world as, well, look at the weird little creature.)

Nothing about the story is at all novel - there's a femme fatale, a mystery, some Cold War spy shenanigans (in general the political milieu of Voyager seems to fluctuate between Cold War and post-Cold War vibes in a way that I suppose feels right for the nineties). The solution of the mystery is quite boring.

Nevertheless it's a romp, as the noir sensibility is self-aware and tongue-in-cheek (at least that's what I take from the music score, which is doing a lot of work). Robin McKee, as Lidell (hmmm that name is a choice) brings some fun, vaguely-Kim-Novak-adjacent energy to her by-the-numbers Bad Lady role. (Some of her costumes were pretty fun!)

What on earth is this show doing with Tom Paris and his construction of bad-boy masculinity? As a homework shirker, negger, and sarcastic antihero, this character is legible to me, but as a man who is allegedly attractive to women, I've got literally nothing. He has nice eyes? His attempts to project "suave, confident pilot" have an uncanny Ken-doll flatness to them.

I suppose Lidell isn't actually into him and is just stringing him along to frame him for her husband's murder, which leads me to the amusing/alarming conclusion that we have no evidence that anyone actually finds Paris charming and he's actually just a bit of a loser. Certainly this episode doesn't position him as the main character - he's completely passive, some dope who gets in trouble and has to be rescued. If this were a hardboiled detective story, he'd be the broad who steps into the detective's office and begs for help.

I misspoke, of course, as Harry Kim apparently still likes Tom Paris, or something. Had to giggle at this line: "Someday it will be you, Harry. You'll meet her, and you'll know it's wrong from the first moment you see her, and you'll know there's nothing you can do about it." Harry conspicuously does not respond. I could write the fanfic, but I shan't.

In short, I had a good time! 3 out of 5 marob root teas, shared on rainy afternoons (may be drugged).

Dogwatch (we may as well institute one): one. Neeka, a scraggly weirdo space dog, appeared as witness for the defense.

[altelchagla]

Lgbt+ Spy Romance Novella "Bon Espionage, Love" characters brief info

Sporty Butch x Suit Butch Lesbians - Saba x Esen

shorter Femme x taller Femme Lesbians - Aigerim x Yosma

Futch Trans x Tomboy Trans Lesbians - Mengi x Tulpar

Curvy Femme lesbian x sporty futch bi - Gulshen x Okta

Femme t/Pan woman x Masculine b/pan man - Katun x Pamir 

Futch cis lesbian x Femme trans lesbian - Zeren x Sevin

Aro Ace curvy short futch woman - Dogha

Aro Ace man - Koray

Masculine x masculine Gays - Tagai x Savash

Trans t/gay x cis b/gay - Ayaz x Ilgar

Femme cis lesbian x femme trans lesbian - Chagda x Eezel

Suit sw/gay x sporty b/gay - Yoler x Aybek

Intersexual They/he with female outlook - Gorkem

Homoromantic Demisexual - Batu

[smytherines]

Honestly I'm so delighted by this conversation. This will probably sound weird, but I'm a big admirer of your art, and you are one of the handful of people who I really feel aligned with in terms of how we view these characters, so it's been amazing to get to talk about it with you!

And I think you're right. I think Curt is careless, and cruel. Even before his big trauma, he is consistently kind of an asshole in A1P1. There's also the tendency for the fandom to minimize or ignore Curt's alcoholism in a way that really undercuts what makes his character so full and real and fascinating to me.

I see him as being very ADHD, leading to him being overly defensive and showing off as much as possible to 1. Prove to himself he is good enough, and 2. Prove to others that he doesn't care what they think about him (even though he obviously does). I also see him as having this... I dunno, masculinity crisis?

Maybe I'm just too in my head because this is basically what the next chapter of my fic is about, but having that push and pull between being what a super spy should be (this like ideal cold, cruel, brutal, cocky Bond-style masculinity) and being a man who loved another man and has more sorta... femme traits (?) than he wants to admit to himself.

Like he's spent so long sanding down all those soft parts of him to be able to be a spy (aka be a killer on the payroll of empire- totally agree that he is utterly brainwashed by the US govt and has a black and white sense of morality) that he instinctively rejects care and tenderness from others, and when he finds himself caring about something or someone too much he cuts them down just as brutally.

I think Owen was the one person he allowed to see him as he really was, so when he kills his own safe harbor it really destroys him. Not just because he loved Owen, but because Owen was the one person who actually knew him and accepted him. And in some horrible tragic cycle, when Owen comes back into his life he kills him again. I think it's an impulsive choice that comes from pain and anger and confusion. But it also reads almost like he's killing off that part of himself that can love another man, if that makes sense?

It's hard for me to look at the staircase scene and not think about this being a gay man killing his ex-lover ostensibly on behalf of a government that would put him in prison or otherwise ruin his life if they found out he has relationships with men. It feels like Owen has long since accepted this reality and is now ideologically committed to Chimera because of it, but Curt can still only see in that Good guys vs Bad guys mentality. Owen's trying to explain that the surveillance network is happening regardless of whether Chimera controls it or not, but Curt just hears "I'm the Bad Guy. Here's my Bad Guy scheme."

Anyways during the show he gradually starts to become... not exactly a better person, but to at least let people in a little bit. He's still obsessed with winning (him going rogue and telling Barb "I need a win here" is such a big character moment to me), he is still desperate to be The Guy, but he's a little less hostile about it. Which is why what he does on the staircase feels emotionally disconnected to me, because it feels like when he's with Owen again he becomes the guy he was at the start again.

And if that's the way the show ended that would honestly be fine. Sometimes you just stay an asshole. But A2P7 very much tries to imply that actually he's fine now. Yes he's drinking whiskey in his coffee at 9am but he's fine. He's going to go take Chimera down on his own, but he's fine. He's asks his mom to restock the bar, but he's fine. I mean, even TCB have said that they added Spy Dance at the end because otherwise it's kind of a bummer ending. And while it's a bop, that basic issue is still kinda there.

It's just... I don't know, I'm getting so far in my own head that I feel like I'm not communicating clearly anymore. So before I ramble any more I'll just end it here and say that it has been an absolute pleasure to talk about this with you, thank you!!

this screenshot lives in my bones I swear. Like... Owen looks so devastated and uncertain, and Curt looks so determined, and I just want to stop that bullet Max Jagerman style and send them both to therapy

[mogai-headcanons]

Medic from Team Fortress 2 is a rabiespunk GNC flamboric femme medcoric gorecoric goreaesic darkangelcoric angelcoric chaosgodic bloodaesic violencecoric intimidangelic evilcoric malmasc lexeprofane scivillainic harvelunaic faggot prettygender doriangender cruorangeligender fouscizte genderfag genderqueer whitegender evillaughgender ultragender redgender genderdead villainic screfian bloodgender genderpunk killgender anarchogender antagogender dovegender demongender angeligender angelfalleen bonea rabiesan hellgender incubian vampiregender corpsegender genderdamned devilgender madscientistgender evilqueer genderpierce knifegender rawbonegender polyamorous T4T bi gay man with ASPD, HPD, NPD, and hypersexuality who is dating Heavy, and the two use dove/doves pronouns for each other as a sign of their relationship! Medic is in a queerplatonic relationship with the Devil, an abrosexual devilgender person who uses only it/its pronouns and can change its physical appearance at will, but prefers to present as masculine!

Spy is a GNPNC flamboric polyamorous T4T midnight sapphic omnisexual postmale overfemme transfeminine succubian lunarian lunar-aligned victonoiric knifegender acrifgender diamondgender dappergender rosenkein suitgender winegender gendernoir darkrosegender wolatorix trans woman with PTSD, HPD, depression, hypsexuality, and anorexia who uses any pronouns besides he/him, but especially likes she/her, they/them, xie/xers, lune/lunes, noir/noirs, pri/prins, fleur/fleurs, purr/purrs, and meow/meows, and now goes by the name Celine! She’s in a queerplatonic relationship with Sniper and engineer and is still on good terms with her ex-wife, a transhet woman with OCD! The rest of the team supports Celine throughout her transition and help her overcome her internalized transphobia and body dysmorphia!

Sniper is an autistic rabiespunk casualic polyamorous T4T demiaroace angled aroace pan gay man naturecoric animalcoric coffeeaesic eucaromic coffeehouseaesic forestcoric transmasculine coffeegender knifegender hookknifen kiwiian rabiesan bozotician foretidian faunagender pannaturae veggender autigender riflegender froggender birdgener buggender mothogender buckgender felisgender bungender lizardgender reptilegender forestgender dirtgender wolfgender papiliogender rodentgender herbgender crochetforaestic fossiligender rawbonegender koala bear naturegender agender man with PTSD, social anxiety, generalized anxiety, OCD, depression, and selective mutism, and woof is a pronoun collector who uses he/him, they/them, it/its, woof/woofs, grr/grrs, howl/howls, roar/roars, hoo/hoos, meow/meows, buzz/buzzes, fir/ferns, branch/branches, leaf/leaves, twig/twigs, hor/horns, liz/lizards, claw/claws, fluff/fluffs, sta/stags, and any other animal- or plant-themed pronouns! He’s in a queerplatonic relationship with Demo, Scout, and Spy!

Heavy is an autistic casualic polyamorous T4T deminebularomantic aroacevague bi gay wintercoric wintfloric coffeeaesic coffeehouseaesic minimalaesic sweateraesic comforwinteric histudystrongic dymalic metallarian autimain libramasculine transmasculine asteroid-aligned crowgender coffeegender emphauntgender cassgender silencegender rawria beargender glaciagender polarnull blizzgender snowgender silinterow bibliogender librainian bear agender man with PTSD and selective mutism due to depression, and dove shares dove/dove pronouns with doves partner Medic as a sign of their relationship!

Demo is an autistic beehearted GNPNC casualic polyamorous T4T non-sam mspec turian ply gay heliancoric cottagecoric beecoric honeycoric solneu beegender genderhoneybee gilfleurabee mellowapis supernova-aligned boomgender genderbang hestiagender heliosgender genderhoney honeycolexic phoenilexic sunboy sugelian panapisgender calidatierramielgender sunfleurian yellowgender solsteseric bear with PTSD and alcoholism who is legally blind due to having one eye, and fae is a pronoun collector who loves finding new neopronouns related to suns special interests of bees, sunflowers, warm weather, and explosives! Some of faer favorites are fae/faer, ey/em, hy/hym, shay/sham, lad/lads, warm/warms, boom/booms, blast/blasts, flam/flames, bang/bangs, sol/sols, sun/suns, buzz/buzzes, yell/yellow, pol/pollens, and beau/beaus, and ey is in a queerplatonic relationship with Soldier, Engineer, Sniper, Scout, and Zhanna, a GNC butch bisexual azurgirl nonbinary man who uses she/her and he/him pronouns!

Engineer is an autistic casualic polyamorous T4T cupioromantic cupiosexual gay-oriented aroace cowboycoric comfycoric farmcoric coffeeaesic coffeehouseaesic cyberminimalaesic botic robothypic killerobotix robiline planet-aligned drustagemasculine modmasculine bullgender sweetteagender coffeegender metalligender botgender videogender arithmogender techgender gendertech cybergender digigender robotgender codegender pantechnicum techfluid tealgender aquagender mniofirin koala bear trans man with ADHD who is physically disabled due to being an amputee, and bo uses he/him, bo/bots, aut/autos, 101/101s, 10101/10101s, exe./exe.s, gear/gears, machine/machines, met/metals, bolt/bolts, nut/nuts, cog/cogs, beep/boops, da/datas, and any other technology-themed pronouns! He’s in a queerplatonic relationship with Spy and Demo and, along with the rest of their team, has informally adopted and raised Pyro as their own!

Scout is an autistic rabiespunk casualic polyamorous T4T bisexual kidcoric arcadecoric soursweetcoatic glitzimusica saturatic neonic rainbowcoric 80scoric trippyaesic glowwavic speedcoric quantum-aligned rabiesan transmasculine neoncoric animecoric boyflux maxspedan boyloud lexechaosic lexebonkyic laughgender gamegender gummygender energydrinkgender chickengender dykegender graffitigender boydyke luniangender adhdgender emojigender ravegender neongender plurgender 90scoric 00scoric zvachgender lesboy nonbinary man with PTSD, dyslexia, and ADHD who uses he/him, they/them, dy/kes, lesbo/lesbos, le/les, bonk/bonks, dino/dinos, rawr/rawrs, xd/xds, x3/x3s, h3/h1s, nya/nyas, loud/louds, cartoon/cartoons, toon/toons, pi/pikas, gummi/gummis, ne/neons, prank/pranks, and any other neopronouns aside from she/her and similar sets, and he’s in a queerplatonic relationship with Soldier, Demo, Sniper, and Miss Pauling, an autistic alloaro bi lesbian who uses she/her and they/them pronouns!

Pyro is an autistic dollhearted GNPNC polyamorous T4T objectum intersex adoragoric dollcoric sweetcoric marofloric floracornic agedreplushic agepetresoftic pastelpinkgender unicorngender sweetiegender plushpinsic fem-kudispec fuwaun pyrogender princessgender vitlisgender vitlisgender cookiegender candygender gendercute lovergender genderwarmth magicalgender joygender dollgender swufegender arsongender flamegender southgender amplexian genderplasma genderplush genderfluff pinkiegutgorgender kamomi kindgender genderblankie firegender ecstimmian pyrocesse nonbinary person with PTSD, DID, ADHD, epilepsy, maladaptive daydreaming, selective mutism, bipolar I disorder, psychosis, undiagnosed dyslexia, and pyromania who is a pet and age regressor and uses no pronouns! Pyro is a gender collector and collects xenogenders related to Pyro’s special interests, and Pyro is in a queerplatonic relationship with Pyro’s unicorn plush, a gay twink named Pinky, and Pyro’s flamethrower, a butch firegender akoisexual lesbian named Pepper! Besides the team, who Pyro consider to all be parental figures, Pyro also sees Pauling, Zhanna, Celine’s ex-wife, and the Devil as part of Pyro’s family!

Soldier is an autistic rabiespunk polyamorous T4T heteroflexible trashcoric maderaromic abandoe amasculine bitrashidae calighn metallarian brearomic rabiesan autigender skunkgender raccoongender cryptidboy awolgender feralgender warhistogender mayonnaisegender breadgender rockgender metalligender malewife trans man with PTSD, Tourette syndrome, epilepsy, dyslexia, psychosis, and an unspecified traumatic brain injury that causes memory loss, mood swings, and partial deafness who kept his birth name, Jane, and mainly uses he/him pronouns for personal convenience, but is open to any pronouns! He’s in a queerplatonic relationship with Demo and Zhanna!

dni transcript here

[aprofessionalwithoutstandards]

im gonna be honest i headcannon all the mercs besides spy as at least masculine, this is because im a gay guy and want to sex them all (besides spy, she's weird bc i kin scout)

I mean, they're all portrayed as masculine men canonically. That's not a headcanon. I personally like to let them play with gender a little bit, not necessarily in a non-masculine way but a less heteronormative way. "Fem Medic" you think Medic isn't already a femme queen? You think Medic is giving butch realness?