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qweerhet · 10 months ago

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we really, desperately need language to discuss the specific material experiences, and ensuing marginalization, that come from your body visibly differentiating from the sex binary, and are not described by intersex language.

currently, discussions of exorsexism like to point out that "nonbinary" is not a label that meaningfully conveys any information about material experiences, that there is no core "nonbinary transition." this is a line of reasoning that i will accept at its bare bones; it's frequently deployed in the most bad faith contexts i have ever had the misfortune to see, but on its face, the bare facts are true. there are, in fact, plenty of nonbinary people whose medical experiences are indistinguishable from binary trans people's, and whose medical experiences are indistinguishable from cis perisex people's. this is true at higher rates than it is for any other trans demographic, given what a broad coalition "nonbinary" covers. i accept the conclusion that "one's physical traits are not connected to being nonbinary whatsoever, any large-scale patterns are mild correlation at best."

regardless of that, however, there is a specific marginalization that does affect nonbinary trans people at higher rates than cis perisex people or binary trans people when it does occur, and that is the marginalization of bodies that are visibly in violation of the sex binary. this marginalization overlaps quite a lot with intersexism--in fact, an unspoken driving factor in binary transitions is frequently not only to "pass as cis," but specifically to "pass as perisex." however, being intersex is a particular life experience & should not be conflated with otherwise violating the sex binary--the marginalization described here is in solidarity with intersex experiences and overlaps heavily with how intersexism manifests materially, but is not described by that language itself.

to define "violating the sex binary": your body does not align with perisex, cisgender, binary constructs of male and female bodies. someone with breasts and a beard falls under this. someone with testes and a uterus falls under this. someone with breasts, a dropped voice, and testosterone-dominant fat and body hair distribution falls under this. someone with a flat chest, a dropped voice, and estrogen-dominant fat and body hair distribution falls under this. there are many thousands of ways to violate the sex binary.

additionally, visibly violating the sex binary as a "transitional" stage in one's binary transition does involve undergoing this marginalization. this marginalization affects cisgender people whose bodies do not align with the sex binary. it also affects people who actively attempt to hide their sex variations, to varying degrees. binary trans people also experience this marginalization, and are welcome to discuss it and feel out language for it, with the understanding that the experience of someone moving intentionally away from experiencing it is fundamentally not the same as the experience of someone who will always experience it and does not have the options to "hide" or "pass," or the experience of someone who actively wants that body. care should be taken to remember that a large number of people who experience this marginalization are actively pursuing the bodies that are subject to it, not as transitional states, but as fully realized bodies in and of themselves.

this is not a post where i am coining language--that is really not my area of expertise. this is a post where i'm hoping to open up discussion, because the transfeminist sphere on this website has a pretty broad effect on trans language and discourse overall, and the things spoken about and coined here often ripple out into the wider world.

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ladythornofrivia · 3 months ago

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The Devil’s Tongue (pt. 3)

a/n: i’m alive! i have been busy for the past few months and have been struggling with my health, but i’m doing okay. i’m here. i never forget about you guys. here’s part 3 of the devil’s tongue. hope you enjoy. i kinda forgot how to use tumblr for a second, but it’s all coming back to me. 💚

warnings: smut, heavy implied smut, dirty talk, horny reader, nerdy michael stalking, profanity

Another set of roses.

This was the second week of full package right outside of your doorstep at the dorm, brick television blasted through the walls, and those who live nearby could hear it.

“Who the fuck delivered this shit?” you asked aloud, ludicrous.

You were hoping for new packages of big dildos. But who the hell delivered flowers at night while you’re deeply focused on finishing a boss battle on a Kingdom Hearts game?

Obviously somebody annoying, you assumed, but it comes with a certain consequences and package.

Since you garnered more attention from males audience, you have received more than $1000, each day before classes, and nights before going to sleep, less stressed, less fucked out.

Lets still sore, and your pussy getting pounded by a plastic dick helps to forget the idiotic moments from a guy who won’t stop pursuing your pussy.

Up until now, you still didn’t know who kept sending you flowers—gets larger and more obnoxious. Moreover, having alongside of candies in the packages. Each time it gets bigger.

Annoyance.

As soon as you looked into your messy room, you’re fucked. There’s no way, a college staff would allow childish presents and compliments. Although once you did give it away by pretending to send package to someone’s door, but magically ended up at your doorstep.

More annoyance.

Oh, it’s getting worse, although you haven’t seen the worst yet.

You hated roses, but you love the color and its fragrance, so preserving one would suffice and threw the rest into the trash—attraction of flies and other infested bugs. Though roses weren’t wasted if distribute to some lonesome women who yearn romance with their inner Shakespeare, or those who are fond of things that wither too soon for a perfect Edgar Allen Poe quote to go alongside it.

Either too romantic or too gothic would suffice—perfect in a sense they’re almost the same, but different font.

The first day you arrived in college—in England—it was stupendous. Away from folks, from cultish family and liars you once called “friends”. Crisp air and crisp sips of tea and munching scones and a full English breakfast and cup of excellent tea you’ve heard so much, from the vast side of the other world—with a profound lack of research, and a town stuck in their own ways.

When traveling, the possibilities are endless. And to unpack and trash all things annoying, family and even old friends.

Friends…

Pfft!

Friends are such a stupid thing of annoyance such as hope to cling hope. “Friends” can only lead to disappointment and betrayal, so why keep them, they’re just baggage needs to be dumped. And who needs friends when you have a large attraction of male audience and big time cash deposited into your fat bank account? And what better way to end interactions than focusing on how to finish junk food in less than 1 minute?

Money wins in the end.

Money prevailed and endured—an ongoing reward for self-pleasure.

Money buys happiness.

Always.

And food. But both were just as good as previous. Stacked on goods and snacks for a late night somber mood would do a trick.

Except it wasn’t.

Junk food has been forgotten when the flowers and a box package of your favorite candies and chocolate decided to show up on this very hour. There was no name, no phone number, no signature. Not even a compliment was showing.

“Who the fuck sent these during my gaming hour?” you asked yourself, guessing. Probably that no good piece of shit you hung out with last time. And with a small grunt, you picked it up and slammed—locking—the door, thinking about buying a sign of “no soliciting/tresspassing” from an online store.

“Ah. Better than nothing,” you added, appeased as you were closing the front door.

Thank god.

~~~

Numbing cheeks stretched to a giant yawn during a productive hour was the worst thing ever occured after the video game night. Couldn’t stop rethinking of last night’s gift from a secret admirer.

Trying to come up with conclusions on who sent numerous gifts by your door. Could it be the recent guy you dumped or was it an ex friend? An ex-friend wouldn’t do this. They’d automatically give you an intense cold-shoulder and fuck you stare on their eyes and spread false gossip about you behind your back.

Unless if it’s an ex-boyfriend you have back in America. But boys in America lack romantic aspects.

Unless if it’s a family member, or members, then they’re sick fucks in the head that needs to be douse in gasoline and set them alight on fire.

Hence why your mind was running. And it didn’t help. Hence why you came and moved into England. Starting fresh without bringing the mentions past scars would be the best course of action.

Nothing is simple, nothing is easy, but traveling far is duo-able.

After a long session on studying Italian culture and a long-dead language Latin, it has been quite some time since the cultish collection of flowers kept you occupied. You haven’t found a way to make a use of the flowers yet.

Hand tucked under your chin as you sighed, unfocused and relented at your current studies, unaware a lean hand distributed a chocolate crunchy bar.

Gazing upwards, there you saw none other than Michael Gavey.

Michael, Michael…

Michael.

The cute nerd you wanted to see.

To fuck his glasses out of his aquiline nose bridge, squeezing at the back of his head while riding your drenched cunt against his face. The boy—the nerdy college boy—to moan equations under your grasp, showered him with your squirt like how your dreams went.

Your recent dreams have been wet.

Frequently wet.

From the innocent acts until escalated to frequent fucking in college’s library to the college class, to the kitchen counter in the dorms, then the bed, once cold now warm with squirt and jizz. Fun and erotic sights to see in your dreams and yearn for an experiment and watch the outcome resolve itself.

Up until now, the roses had come up subconsciously, an urge to unveil the mystery.

“Michael…” you uttered low, trying to maintain eye contact as possible without the possibility of crushing over someone who is a weirdo who loves math equations.

“You look exhausted,” he assumed.

But he assumed wrong.

“I was up. I was up all night,” you managed to say.

“Studying, I assume.”

“Playing video games,” you said. “I can’t stand quietness around the dorm. Makes me feel isolated.”

He hummed.

“I figured you wanted a krunchy,” Michael said, one of the little corners of his lips turned upward, seeing your eyes twinkled at the chocolate.

“I—I do,” you stuttered. “I love chocolate, especially with juicy jizz—glaze! Glaze! I just love glaze! Especially with donuts with nice glaze with nice ultimately sweet goopy filling on the center inside!”

Stomach coiled in embarrassment that you might as well tuck yourself to shame somewhere no one finds you on this earth.

You sighed, as Michael quirked his brow, unreachable but slightly—ever so more—confused. Even with shut eyes, the glint brightness of his nerdy glasses were glaring at you.

Daring to look at his long glance, your shoulders tensed. “Sorry, I had something on my mind since yesterday. It got me busy,” you explained, sighing, thinking of the afterthoughts of what to do with the flowers. Still useless of decorating, still useless with charitable case of donation. “I didn’t have coffee this morning.”

Knowing that in England, people prefer nice plain organic tea and biscuits or scones.

Distracted, the heat on your cheeks arise.

“Quite a little spectical, I’ll give you that,” Michael said with a dry chuckle, as your legs crossed, one foot making little kicks while Michael came and sat down beside you, almost with disinterested, but a peak of intrigued, hopefully not with a daunting comment.

Hoping he doesn’t know what jizz is. Better yet, a whole language of slang from the west.

For days you have been searching videos at the porn website. Masturbating over the spare time became quite useful for someone who’s randomly horny as you. Day or night.

Horny and desperate from wanting to touch you, but the moment some guy touches you, you instantly kicked him to the boot—nothing more.

They say every guy’s hands are experienced. But what experienced does a guy have other than being insensitive and dull and careless?

They offer nothing to the table, offered no speciality that could qualify or overreached your expectations. Every boy are dull, dull after dull. Nothing is exceptional.

Unless…

Michael’s red sweater kept you more occupied with a rather distinct distraction. It was a nice shade of rich red. A burgundy. Reminded you of the vibrant roses from previous nights.

Nearly groaned at the sight of his top, your legs crossed and clenched tighter. Lips bruised from your teeth clutching, no gash leaking over your lush red lips, as eyes wandered and admiringly over a single spectate.

He looked good in red. For a good, weird nerd.

I wonder if I bruise him good, too.

A good nerd. A weird nerd. Obsessed about equations and numbers.

I bet I could make him cuss out during sex. Moaning in numbers and letters while bucking yourself against does seem tempting. Not a typical guy who touches women, but does the lusty temptation escalated.

But he’s so stubborn.

Red scars and red bruises.

Red tears, maybe.

You fear as if your invisible red horns were sprouting on your head. Not that you dislike red horns. You fear someone might see it. In shadows, in daylight. You like to think yourself as a perverted, moody devil who’s in for a good long fuck. Except you haven’t had a proper date on a long run.

“There’s a Halloween party coming up soon,” Michael’s voice barged into your occupied thoughts. “Have you been looking into that?”

“Um, no,” you said stiffly.

“But I have. Apparently, only those who are qualified enough to go to party. As if I’m going with those looosersss.”

But you knew he’s been longing on being a cool kid but doesn’t know how.

Shoulder shrugged. “I don’t care much about the party. Not really my style.”

“I thought you’d go.”

“What makes you say that?”

He stared over your shoulder, and the indication is clear. Both Felix Catton and his cousin—what’s his face? You didn’t know.

“I saw them speaking to you in the morning.” Michael’s lips pouted.

Cute as fuck.

“Who? Them?” you scoffed. “I don’t know those fuckers. They just came up to me and I thought they’re trying to sell drugs or something.”

“But they were inviting you,” he persisted.

“So? I don’t care much the party life. If I actually want to go, I would’ve said yes and would fuck them in some way. But then again, I did say I’m going to think about it, just to make them back off. Especially that weirdo cousin.”

Michael’s brows tucked. “Fuck?”

Fuck. Wrong phrase.

“Anyway, it’s not my business…I have other plans to go for. Just not in the mood with parties for now. Unless….you’re going?”

Michael scoffed, taking out his math textbook and notebook.

“Guess not.” You went back to concentrate on your unfinished homework.

“What happened to your boyfriend, by the way?”

You shot at him with a dirty look. “Wait, that ugly fuck? I don’t care much about the dude.”

Talking about exes is a no-no, on a girl’s standard and rule when talking to the opposite sex. Especially when the said opposite you found oddly attractive with equation.

After shoving you out of the elevator, a dealbreaker has set in and decided to break things off as if you consider the guy exist.

You don’t even recall his name.

Michael’s relaxed hand recoiled to a fist. It was subtle.

Your eyes softened. “So…I do need help with something. Something that I’m having a hard time with, and I need some assistance with sums. Does that ring any bell?”

Michael smirked, his fist hasn’t uncoiled. “Math.”

You flashed a wink at him. “So, are you going to help a damsel in distress, or are you going to sit there and be emo?”

Michael’s eyes flickered. “Emo?”

Thank god he doesn’t know the slangs. He’s cute. I can feel my red horns are growing.

“Just help a poor girl out, please? With a red cherry on top?”

My cherry was dying to get out. I want Michael to pop my cherry.

Michael hummed, watching you. “Listen carefully, (Y/N). I’m not a patient man.”

“I can take the pain. Whatever you give me,” you said, winking.

Thank god Michael is oblivious to my pervy statement.

Michael hummed again. “The sooner we do this the better.”

You nodded and get the math textbook, but you knew it wasn’t enough, so you’re planning on gathering textbooks. But Michael is already a walking math textbook. Maybe he would explain things better.

“You’re nails. They’re red,” he said.

Your heart palpitated. “You like them?”

Michael hummed.

You wanted to tackle and jump on his face with your wet cunt.

Despite the randomness crossing your mind, you took it as a yes.

Dear Diary,

I want to shove my fingers in his mouth as I bounce on his cock.

~~~

It’s been hours since Michael taught you with math problems, including xyz and triangular shapes and parentheses. As much as you despise the numbers and the math’s creator, you watched Michael’s lips formed in soft curls and once in a while his tongue peaked out.

I want him to lick my hot, wet pussy.

Make this perverted girl happy.

Lick my wet cherry.

Not long before, the library is almost empty. And thus, the conclusion of tutoring session is over. So you devised a plan.

“Instead here, why don’t you go at my dorm? You know, we could study there. The library is too echoey and I hate it when my voices gets suddenly too loud. How does that sound?

You swore you saw Michael’s eyes suddenly glinted, like a pouted cat turned mischievous, almost naughty. But in plain sight.

Without Michael saying anything, you said, “Great. I’ll see you there. Don’t forget your smart pants when you meet at my dorm.”

~~~

Michael’s plan came into a fruition. He knew that offering for a tutoring session could get closer to you. With that annoying boy-toy you used to hookup with has been nagging in. As he knocked on your door, you opened, revealing your bright smile and welcoming, realizing she kept all the flowers he gave you, hoping you enjoy the gift.

His heart skipped a beat.

The closer to you, the more chances to get a glimpse of your personal life. The more he’ll see the true you.

His heart skipped a beat.

As for the boy you casually hook up with, hopefully no one finds his body.

Taglist: @remuslupinwife1 @kittendoll05 @xcharlottemikaelsonx @paninisstuff @angeljcca @marvelescvpe @heavenly1927 @snh96 @httpsmenace @domithebomi @moonseye @faesspace @liannafae @buccini555 @watercolorskyy @taangie @qardasngan @jolixtreesunn @screaming-potato @dixie-elocin @momowhoo @saturnssrings @dani5216 @blackgaladriel @theboleyngirlx @elaratyrell @fun-loving-peach @jmliebert @ilikechocolatemilkh @20thcentwriter @sepherinaspoppies @venmondiese @snowprincesa1 @witchy-v1xen @1800-fight-me @fan-goddess @persephonerinyes @anukulee @justablondeee @viktoriaashleyyx @lcolumbia1988 @ilikemintpeassss-blog @arcielee @hippiedippiekitty @bellaisasleep @lokiofasgard12 @barnes70stark @vipervixxen @f1girlieee @namelesslosers @darylandbethfanforever9

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crazyalien87 · 2 years ago

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tell that to my eyes then

what

#i simultaneously have dysphoria over not having a dick & a combo of dysphoria/disgust over my ugly face & male fat distribution #it is confusing #my brain is like “u look like a disgusting basement moid” & “u are not male enough” in the same breath

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mikary-art · 10 days ago

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✦°Enmu Headcanons°✦

《Side-Note》 ☆ = Canon in the Manga and/or Anime as well.

♤ = Mix between canon and based/implied facts.

◇ = Based of a canon or implied fact in the Manga and/or Anime.

□ = Purely Headcanon

_______________________________________

✦ Physical Headcanons ✦

☆ Height: 168cm

☆ Weight 62kg

☆ Is in his/was turned into a demon at his mid-twenties.

-> □ Specifically when he was 25.

□ He is left-handed.

☆ His nails are painted in a light blue grey polish and are kept short and blunt.

☆ He is mildy toned in his arms.

◇ Enmu seems to have a more bottom heavy* body type 《*Lower body is broader/wider than the upper body,also known as triangle or pear-shape body type.》 with broader legs and thighs.

-> □ Personally I believe that it's both a blend of muscle and fat tissues. As biological male individuals can also tend to store fat in the thighs,due to lower levels of testosterone. That being said Enmu doesn't strike me as someone with high testosterone levels. His thighs but legs in general have a more soft look and feel to them,due the fat tissue being subcutaneous,meaning it's directly underneath the skin but above the muscles. Though despite that,Enmu has quite the strength in his legs.

□ To compliment the fat distribution a little,I like to think that Enmu has a little subcutaneous fat on the lower portion of his abdomen as well. On the outside this isn't very noticeable,but he's got a small bit of chub there.

◇ He appears to be fairly flexible and athletic,evident by how he is able to evade Tanjiro's attacks. Ontop of that Enmu seems to have a good balance,judging by how he is capable of balancing himself on one arm,doing a handstand backwards while on the roof of a moving train and keeping himself stable in the air,when unleashing his Blood Demon Art.

◇ Enmu seems to have smallish and shorter fangs,both in his upper and lower jaw,which are however still pronounced enough to be recognized as fangs.

-> □ Additionally his fangs are on the thinner side,as I headcanon Lowermoons to have fangs that lean on the more shorter and thinner build. Whereas Uppermoons have longer and thicker fangs.

☆ He is shown to be capable of detaching and re-attaching his left hand on will and move it independently,when separated from his body. Furthermore Enmu is able to speak through his hand-mouth as well as see,by growing an additional eye on his left hand.

☆ The tongue,lips and jaws of the hand-mouth are depicted to be able to move just the same as the features of an actual mouth.

-> □ However,unlike an actual mouth,the mouth on Enmu's hands barely produces saliva,due to the lack of the respective glands. Neither is the hand-mouth able to consume the flesh or liquids of prey,given it doesn't have an esophagus,nor is it connected to Enmu's digestive system.

☆ Enmu relies on defensive movements in combat,instead of offensive when in one-on-one/direct fights. His fighting style mostly consists of precise dodges to shield his body and paralyzing his opponents with his blood demon art,instead of trying to attack them head-on.

[▪︎--------- •✦• ---------▪︎]

✦ Biographical Headcanons ✦

□ Birthdate: 26th of October around the late Meiji-Era

□ Place of Birth and Upbringing: Gifu 《Gifu is the capital city located in the south-central portion of the Gifu Prefecture.》

☆ Occupation: Sham-Doctor,specialized in Hypnotherapy 《Former,but still partially active as a Demon》 ; Lowermoon One of the Twelve Kizuki 《 Current》

□ Sexuality: ◇Homosexual/Gay & Demisexual

□ Romantic Orientation: Demiromantic

□ Sex/Gender: Male

□ Pronouns: He/Him

□ Gender Expression/Representation: Androgynous with a slight masculine lean

《Side-Note:During the Period that Demon Slayer is set in,Enmu would be seen as masculine though.》

[▪︎--------- •✦• ---------▪︎]

✦ Psychological Headcanons ✦

□ MBTI-Type: ISTJ/INTJ both assertive and turbulent

☆ Enmu dealt with Dream-Reality-Confusion 《DRC》 since he had been a young child.

□ As a result of having issues to decipher what was real and what was not,Enmu quickly developed to be excessively organized and wrote down import events in a journal,regardless if they were confirmed to be true or not. In the hopes to gain more orientation and control over his Consciousness and Unconsciousness.

□ Thus it was to be expected that Enmu grew to get anxious and stressed when his own life threatened to spiral out of his control. That being said,Enmu does not reach out for help if his control should slip,he is too [self-]control oriented to pass the power that comes with it onto someone else,regardless of how well that person might mean.

□Additional this anxiety over losing his [self-]control over situations,his life,etc. causes Enmu to be quite the clean-freak,excessive organizer and overhead-thinking,evident by how carefully and throughout he planned his operation on the Mugen Train. 《 From mixing his blood into the ink for the tickets,to getting three children and the train conductor to follow his orders without disobedience. 》

-> In conclusion to these,I headcanon Enmu to have OCD,as well as Insomnia due to being partly afraid of falling asleep because of the risk of not being able to decipher what happened within a dream and what in reality,resulting in sleep loss/deprivation which also lead to occasional narcolepsy.

《Side-Note: Nacrolepsy isn't always genetically due,as it can also be caused by major psychology distress as well as sudden changes in sleep pattern,which given Enmu's sleep loss/deprivation is unfortunately prone to happen. Excluding his OCD,Enmu's sleep related conditions lessened in severity when he became a demon,but they didn't fully dissappear.》

☆ Enmu is both sadistic and masochistic,though the latter is selective. Given he only expresses ecstasy and pleasure at the hands of those he admires/envious/idolizes and sees as his superior. For instance at how he voiced to be in state a of ecstasy after experiencing pain from receiving a doses of Muzan's blood. However such a state was not the case whilst fighting against Rengoku and Tanjiro in his train-fused state,who caused him genuine physical pain,evident by how Enmu screamed out in pain upon having his tendril appendages severed by either of their breathing techniques.

◇ To come back to Enmu's sadistic tendencies,it is easy to assume that he is apathetic and selfish,taking how he sourced out the conductor who lost his wife and a young boy with tuberculosis,amongst the other two misery-ridden children for example to cooperate in his plans. His apathy and cruelty towards humans is only accentuated by his statement of "All human hearts are the same. So fragile and weak, like glasswork." punctuating how he doesn't view humans as individuals [All human hearts are the same] but as vulnerable creatures,who in turn of their vulnerabilities are easy prey to a demon like him.

♤ Enmu shows to be self-aware when it comes to his own physical weaknesses and takes them into account in order to counter-messure them,given he avoids direct confrontation and unfolds his plans when certain that he is undetected. Relaying on stealth and secretiveness,but also overwhelm and exhaustion,to get his targets into vulnerable and defenseless positions without them noticing it,so Enmu can overpower them via the ambush method. In addition to the overwhelm and exhaustion method,this is evident by how the demon slayers had to protect over 200 hundred hostages while fighting him at the same time,which would have tired them out eventually. This shows that Enmu knows that he isn't able to hold and get the upper hand through brute force. This also reflects in how he only recruits vulnerable people that are easy to manipulate and exploit,through false-hope and promises and pretended empathy and sympathy. Kowing he can offer them an escapism to their misery,that would present himself as attractive to agree with his conditions and bindings and hold onto their end of the whole bargain. Although Enmu doesn't seem to give his recruits an all too vital role in his plans,evident by how he only expresses a mere acknowledgment that the children are struggling to shatter the demon slayers spiritual cored,instead of any real worry in regards to his plan. Proofing that the children were rather an optimization in his operation rather than a necessity. Accentuating how he is too control oriented to task someone with something that he has to put his trust in to be done right,in other words being dependent on another person.

-> □《 One could say that he operates strongly after the saying "If you want it done right,you should do it yourself.》

[▪︎--------- •✦• ---------▪︎]

✦ Likes & Dislikes ✦

□ Despite growing up in a city,Enmu prefers the quiet and peaceful places,where he can be on his own. -> Enmu doesn't dislike being in public,a crowd or living in the city per say,he just prefers being left alone.

《 ♤ Through Lady Tamayo it is confirmed that demons can potentially modify their bodies to drink tea without regurgitating it later on. ◇Although it is more of an exception to the rule rather than the norm,I headcanon that demons who are part of the Kizuki and/or able to manipulate the flesh/blood/cells of their body to a potent degree,such as being able to summon weapons or objects from their bodies -like Kokushibo or Gyokko for example- are capable of doing this as well. However it is important to note that drinking tea is a hedonistic/indulgent act for demons,as the rule still stands that they don't gain nourishment from anything other than human flesh and blood.

->□ That being said Enmu is capable of and enjoys drinking tea. His favorites being green tea,mint,chamomile and Hojicha.

□ As a human,his favorite flavors were salty-sweet,cheesy and spicy.

□ Enmu likes going on walks in forests and nature early in the mornings as long its still dark and fog still clouds the lands. Finding being surrounded by mist to have a mysterious,dreamy and calming atmosphere.

□ He likes incense and scented candles,with his favorite scents being vanilla,mint and lavender.

□ Leaning into his dream-themed characteristics,I like to think that Enmu made and likes dream-catchers and their aesthetic. Furthermore he occasionally wrote and still writes philosophical poems about dreams and incidents in his life,as a way to better process his thoughts about them and cope with difficult feelings and moments.

□ To come back to his statement about human hearts being like glasswork,I headcanon Enmu to like collecting trinkets and knickknacks out of clear glass that are on the decorative and artistic side.

□ Additional I can picture Enmu liking rain and the sight and sounds of lakes and rivers. He strikes me as the type of person to enjoy leaning onto a window ledge,the window itself open and just watching as well as listen the rain pour from above. Given most water surfaces easily ripple,there this association of the misty and distored edge that dreams tend to have. That and Enmu just finds the element of water to be fascinating and soothing. If ever having the means to,Enmu would travel to the coast to see and experience the ocean in person. Watching the waves wash up at the shore,feeling the water before his very eyes and feet as he walks along the beach.

□ Given his more lone-wolf/introverted type of personality,Enmu doesn't favor the presence of (young) children. Thinking of them as inconvenient,nuisance,and troublemakers or easy to manipulate for selfish gains at best.

#Enmu Tamio #Enmu #Enmu Headcanons #Headcanons #character headcanons #mika-writes #Demon Slayer #kimestu no yaiba #long post

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bonefall · 1 year ago

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bones im doing the math and a stellers jay cooked properly can feed like four cats. no wonder clan cats have so many rules about prey distribution birds are so full of nutrition you can just coast on it. bones i did the math and if they take down an eagle they could feed like a hundred cats oh god boar meat is so worth it isnt it

EDIT: Boar math update

The average male boar is 440 pounds, which is 200 kilograms, 200,000 g x 5 = 1 million calories.

That will feed an entire Clan for months. All through the three months of winter. Boar meat is sososososo worth it, it's INSANE. ThunderClan should actually be The Fat Clan, these guys are partaking of the sweet fat of the hog and absolutely rolling in extra calories.

(This is actually why I draw a lot of my ThunderClan cats with bellies, like Lionblaze. This man finds himself in the path of food because his Clan has lots to offer lmao)

^ Lionblaze the first day Willowpelt took him on as a secondary apprentice

Ducks are a REALLY good target for Clans, also. Average mallard drake is 3.5 pounds, 1.5 kilos, 9,000 calories. One duck feeds the entire Clan for a day.

I will say though, EXTRA knowledge; remember that calories don't necessarily satiate hunger! A lot of factors do, but you can summarize them with weight in the context of cats. My cat's usually full around 85 grams, but I know some cats who can hoover a big can of food in a single sitting.

(long answer: protein, fiber, thickness, if you had a drink beforehand, eating slowly, etc. But we're talking about prey meat here)

So your stellar's jay example is usually about 100 to 120 grams (though since my guys are in England, they wouldn't encounter those), which would basically be a meal two cats share. If that's breakfast they'll have hit all their calories for the day, but they'll still feel hungry for lunch and dinner.

This is why soups are so cool btw. This was a soup post all along. It's soupaganda time

Not only do you get that boost from cooking the meat here, but the value is more evenly distributed through the whole dish, the weight of the broth languishes in the stomach to make you feel full, AND ALSO IT'S A CLEAN SOURCE OF HYDRATION. You BOILED the water and didn't even think about it. That 120g prey item is now nutrition for 3 cats, a whole meal for 6, plus an easy way to get more water into sick warriors who may not feel like eating.

Get yourself some mushrooms, a couple pieces of prey, whatever leftovers that would otherwise go to waste, and BAM you've got your whole Clan stuffed and happy, even if they didn't manage to hit the caloric minimum of the day.

#The biggest flying bird that your basic British BB!Cat would be encountering is a wood pigeon #Which is larger than a stellar's jay weighing around a pound #nutrition guide #clan culture #better bones au

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grison-in-space · 8 months ago

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the thing that you miss when you remove gonads from an animal is that you keep all the organizing effects you got and you lose all the activating ones (until and unless you start HRT but I digress).

the organizing effects are the ones where a particular hormone profile permanently changes tissues using feed forward inhibition routes. Hair growth is one of those in humans! Once you start growing hair somewhere, you're going to continue growing hair there until you either fundamentally change the tissues structurally (e.g. electrolysis) or you die. Same as voice depth or breast growth in humans. These are one and done shifts.

The activating ones are the ones where removing the gonads and returning to a prepubertal or postreproductive circulating hormone profile means the effect ceases. For example, most sex specific plumage color is like this on birds—and when a hen's remaining ovary goes, she will often feather in like a male of her species rather than her old feathers. In humans, you can think of muscle-to-fat ratios and fat distribution patterns under this category.

The thing about sex differences is that they are not necessarily predictable, including the ways in which they interact physically with health problems (eg ehler danos diagnoses... bc testosterone enhances collagen production which can help compensate for poor collagen generated by the EDS genetic state). And again a LOT depends on what else is going on in the background: what is the impact of sex hormones on this or that tissue, and where within the fitness landscape ("functionality zone") is the tissue before we consider putting sex hormones in it?

so anyway that's what you're varying if you're moving time of spay/neuter around; either way you intend to clear out all the activating stuff out, but you can decide how much organizational change you want to happen before you remove the gonads.

hi, I do actually work on sex differences and I have a font of knowledge tonight

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female-malice · 2 years ago

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Wait, do you have examples? (of what you just posted about, artists just adding boobs to male references) I haven't seen this before and it sounds weird

here's what gen-z artists think buff women look like:

"buff musketeer"

and here is what literally the buffest woman on the planet looks like:

fencers/duelers/musketeers are thin and agile, not buff. but whatever. that's not the point

buff women do not look like buff men with boobs. you can't just take a reference photo of a buff man and add boobs.

women's ab muscles look different from men's

women have different fat distribution than men do so we look different when we put on muscle

boobs on strong women don't look like two random circles on top of a male chest

pseudoscience gender lunatics went around saying men and women are physically identical so now kids don't know anatomy

rhea exists and yet still. still. these hacks refuse to honor the raw power of the female form

i'm so tired

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boy-gender · 1 year ago

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Post-Top Surgery Weight Gain: Will My Breasts Grow Back? (Nope!)

I've had a couple people message me asking about this privately, and it was something I had a fear of when I was getting ready for top surgery, so I wanted to address it in a public post:

After top surgery, your breasts will NOT grow back, even if you are not on testosterone. No, not even if you gain weight.

The chest is, to borrow Shrek's wisdom, like an onion, and has many layers. The ones top surgery is concerned with are the chest wall (muscle), the breast tissue, fat, and skin, in that order.

Your chest wall is a bunch of muscle that protects your organs. This will not be removed or touched. Your breast tissue sits on top of that, and this is what will be removed during surgery, leaving just enough tissue to make your chest proportional to your body. Very few people have totally flat chests. On top of this is body fat, much of which will also be removed or reshaped during surgery. Then there is your skin, and your nipples. Typically nipples (including areola, the area around your nips) will be taken off, trimmed down to a smaller 'masculine' shape, then grafted back on. Or you don't have to get your nipples back at all! I didn't, so it's up to you.

To reiterate: your breast tissue will NEVER regrow. Your nipples and areola will NEVER regrow, regardless of if you are on T or not.

However, FAT may fluctuate in this area. If you lose weight, whether on T or not, you will probably lose fat here and may have loose skin, which many surgeons can address in revisions. If you gain a substantial amount of weight and are not on T, you may gain more fat here- take a look at your close female relatives. When they gain weight, do they gain it in their breasts and side-boob area? When they lose weight, do they go down a cup size?

If you are on T, testosterone will change the way your body distributes the weight it gains. Look at your close male relatives. I'd be willing to bet money that when they gain weight, they gain it predominantly in their stomach. When you are on T, your body will probably begin to redistribute the way it gains fat to a more 'typically male' pattern, like the stomach, as opposed to hips, thighs, and chest.

Something to keep in mind, especially for fat people but really for anyone getting top surgery: YOUR ANGLE IS DIFFERENT! Look down at your chest right now, pre op. You can see aalllll the way down your cleavage. But if you asked someone standing in front of you if they could see all your cleavage, they could not. Even if you were naked, you seeing your own chest from a top-down angle makes things look further out/rounder/bigger than how other people see you.

Please keep this in mind when you look at your surgery results- the fat that was left behind and reshaped on me looks bigger/rounder to me, looking down, than to other people looking at me. And this is only in resting position! Move your arms around (once it's safe dont do this freshly out of surgery please dear god), raise them over your head, put them out to your sides and T pose. Look at the way the fat moves under your skin and around your body; how it looks 'flatter' in some positions and 'rounder' in others. This is totally normal! This is what skin and fat are supposed to do, and do on everyone who has skin and fat! These are NOT breasts, and they will NEVER be breasts again.

I hope this helps some peoples fears be assuaged. I know it can feel silly to ask if your breasts will grow back, but it is a valid fear, especially for plus size people, and it is also a fear I hope is now at rest. Your breasts will never come back. You're gonna look and feel great.

tl;dr- no, your boobs will never come back after top surgery, regardless of whether you are on T or not. you might have leftover fat here or gain fat here, but this is a universally human experience, and happens to cis men just as much as any other person. also, your angle viewing your own chest from the top-down is a misleading optical illusion that is not accurate to what other people see looking at you front on.

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detransition · 9 months ago

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from missmastectomy

A mastectomy has physical AND social repercussions. A therapist or a surgeon might tell you the obvious, like that you can’t breastfeed and that your breasts won’t grow back post-mastectomy, but they won’t tell you about what the mastectomy *feels* like. They can’t. They have never experienced it.

I can tell you, though.

I am 3 years post double mastectomy (top surgery, not cancer related). It is nothing like having a naturally flat chest. Even without my incision scars, my chest doesn’t have the same fat distribution on either side, though it’s small enough to be noticeable to me and not anyone else. I have sensation, but it’s very much dulled, especially on my nipples. I’ve seen it described as the chest feeling like a black hole and I have to agree.

I don’t look like I have a “male chest,” and a big part of that is because I have curves. Males and females FUNDAMENTALLY have very different chests and removing your breasts WILL NOT give you a flat, girly look or a male look. That is highly unlikely. You are much more likely to look like a woman with scars and just a generally “off” chest.

There’s so much trans art out there that just doesn’t represent what a double mastectomy looks like in real life. It is highly romanticized and often portrayed as ✨ cutesy scars ✨ on an otherwise masculine body. No. No no no, that is not what this procedure does! I promise you that when you look up trans mastectomy results, you are going to end up seeing the “best ones,” the most successful ones, often on transmen who pass quite well and already have pretty masculine body types.

You are far less likely to hear about the botched surgeries, which thankfully mine is not. The surgeries where people need multiple revisions, the surgeries where people lose ALL sensation, the surgeries where people develop chronic pain.

When you get a mastectomy, you are removing a body part full stop. There are going to be side effects because this procedure is no joke, and mine are comparatively mild. I get itching on my scars sometimes and a mild burning sensation, which can be triggered by stress. Even if it’s elective and you think you want this, your body will remember it has lost a piece of itself. It doesn’t matter how dysphoric you are. There used to be something on your chest and now it is gone forever and nothing will bring it back, barre more surgery that is nothing but an imitation of the real thing.

I cannot express to people considering this surgery how difficult recovery is and living with it afterwards, even if you’re happy at first. I was happy at first. But then I detransitioned and realized I had been taken advantage of by a sociopathic, money hungry surgeon as a teenager. Even if I had persisted as trans, I would still deal with the fact that my flatness was not natural, but surgically constructed. My body could never forget the physical trauma of being sliced into like that, no matter how much I thought I wanted it.

You are not a Mr. Potato head. These are serious surgeries and they have serious, life long repercussions. Your breasts are not baby feeders or male attractors - they are a part of your body, your temple. And your body will feel the loss, even if (at first) you do not.

Do not get this as an elective procedure. These surgeons are lying to you. They don’t care about you. All they care about is money. The next time your dysphoria acts up and you’re considering a mastectomy, don’t think about the fantasy you’ve constructed in your mind where you’re just a male with chest scars. Instead, think about the fact that I’m order to achieve this “look,” you literally need to maim yourself. Think about the total loss of sensation, the dangers of the surgery itself, the feeling of complete and utter violation you will live with permanently if you ever regret your decision.

And then make your choice.

thinking of detransition? you are not alone

#detransition #detrans #ftmtf #1st #detrans ftm #detrans female #ftm detransition #ftm detrans #actuallydetrans #actually detrans #mastectomy #top surgery

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ckret2 · 2 years ago

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hey ^^ I love your bill goldilocks cipher, and I was wondering why he possesses a female-presenting body. I am a huge fan of your art btw so don’t take this the wrong way, I just would love to know how you designed him!

The short answer: because he's canonically referred to with he/him pronouns.

The long answer: if you meet somebody who, at a first glance, appears to be anatomically female, and everyone refers to this person with he/him pronouns, you don't immediately know what's going on.

Maybe he's a trans man who's comfortable with his body the way it is as long as everyone around him still treats him as a man. Maybe she's a trans woman with really transphobic acquaintances. Maybe he's nonbinary, maybe he's genderfluid, maybe he's a drag queen who's dressed up for an event but not currently in character, maybe he's a he/him lesbian—you don't know, and it likely isn't your business.

There's only one thing you do know: whatever's going on here, it probably ain't cishet. This person has something going on that does not fit the gender binary. All you can say about him is that he's queer.

Bill's gender is triangle. This simply does not fit within humanity's popular ideas about the male-female binary. Whatever his sexual orientation is, it is not restricted to "only females/only males (as humanity defines femaleness/maleness)"—and so he can't possibly be heterosexual in a manner readily recognizable to human beings. Amongst Bill's own species, maybe he was the most cishet guy you've ever met, I haven't decided; but if you stick Bill amongst humans, regardless of how he sees himself, he'll look queer to us.

On top of that: stick Bill in a human body, and there's a disconnect between his self-identity and the shape he's wearing. Strangers will see him as something he's not: human. He feels trapped in a wrong-shaped form amongst people who think this is normal and what he feels he should be is strange—and if he ever explains that psychological weight of feeling wrong-shaped, the humans most likely to go "I think I get it" are the trans folks who know what dysphoria feels like.

I don't think Bill cares what pronouns humans give him; I think he's called "he/him" either because his human victims decided he sounds male-ish, or else because he consciously decided to take advantage of sexism by presenting himself as male to seem more authoritative. And I don't think Bill cares about the anatomy of the human body he's in; he could have been given any variety of genitalia, secondary sex characteristics, hormone balances, body fat distributions, etc., and he would have been equally uncomfortable in any because they're not a triangle. It makes no difference to him.

But it does something to you (you, The Readers In General): it makes you wonder about his relationship with his body.

Because we're speaking English on the Internet in the 21st century, you and I are participating in a culture that sees having both a vagina and he/him pronouns as Not The Default. It makes Bill look genderqueer-in-a-human-way, and that makes it easier to slide readers over to seeing him as genderqueer-in-a-nonhuman-way. It makes you think about queerness, about dysphoria, about nonbinary folks who defy the expected correlations between pronouns and anatomy without changing their bodies to make them "match."

This is the second or third time somebody's asked me why I put Bill in a female-presenting body. If I'd done the opposite, nobody would have ever asked me why I put Bill in a male-presenting body. Because that's "normal." And I want you to ask questions! I want you to think about Bill's self-image, his internal landscape, the gulf between who he is mentally and what he is physically.

Before I ever directly draw attention to queer topics, I can get folks primed to think about them and to understand that his body doesn't accurately represent his identity just by slapping a pair of boobs on him.

So I slapped a pair of boobs on him.

#anonymous #ask #about my writing #bill goldilocks cipher

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